Chapter Text
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Stepping out into the fields, Seras stops and looks at the Hellsing Manor. It's funny to think that this place was almost destroyed over thirty years ago. Her memory floods with the times before: Walter, Young Integra, the Wild Geese Crew.
It hurts to think that she'll eventually have to leave this place behind. To leave this place that's a grave for fallen soldiers and comrades in battle. 'They were friends too...' she thought. She remembers how they often trained together and stayed up ''late'' with them, watching CD movies and playing board games.
She sighed, "Well, it's no use dwelling on the past now, Seras." She took careful steps into the manor, closing the huge door behind her as she went in.
Empty.
The halls were empty. How unusual. Servants would often be walking in the halls at this time before they retired to bed. 'Perhaps they went in early?' She paid no mind to it and headed for the stairs that led to the basement.
When she had first joined the Hellsing Organisation, traversing down these stairs always gave her an eerie, unsettling feeling in her stomach. Though over the years, she has grown rather used to it. Sure, the eerie vibe didn't leave, but she had to just get used to it. But unfortunately... it feels deathly uncomfortable tonight.
'It's fine, Seras. You've been down here a billion times. Heck, I live down here. So...' Why does she feel this way? She tries to ignore the feeling in her gut. She probably feels this way because of the earlier events that transpired in Integra's office. Maybe, maybe not.
She finally reached her room and opened the door, as usual, dark. Darker... than usual. Her eyes actually needed to adjust to the dark this time. Infact, when she came into the manor, she had to adjust her eyes to the dark.
'Something's...not right.'
She gulped. This is unknown, and Seras doesn't like the unknown. Maybe she's just overreacting and simply making herself scared for no reason.
"Pip?" She called out.
No answer.
She started to bite the inside of her mouth, feeling nervous. Suddenly, Pip appeared. Seras jolted, bolting to her bed. He stood there, looking at her with confused eyes. "Somethin' wrong?" She let out a relieved sigh, climbing up on her bed and kicking off her boots. "I'm just.. feeling really jumpy, I don't know why." She rubbed her arm with her head down. Not knowing what to tell the former captain.
Pip looked at her worriedly and walked over to her. "It's fine... It's probably Alucard's weird attitude." Seras looked up at him. Alucard's attitude? What does he have to do with anything?
"What do you mean?" Pip rubbed his neck nervously. "I mean, the guy barely comes out of his little cell, aye? The man's practically a loner. And with Integra slowly but surely dying, the poor guy is a loner." Seras rolled her eyes at his joke. But.. he might be right. In that moment in Integra's office, she was all too focused on herself rather than Alucard. He was there... she just wasn't paying much attention to him.
"I wonder how much different things would be if Walter were here..." She leaned back on her bed and sprawled out like a starfish, staring up at the dark ceiling. "Sometimes I wonder too, Seras dear." Pip collapsed on the bed beside her and stared at the ceiling, also.
She pouted. It was heartbreaking that day, figuring out he had betrayed Hellsing, and most importantly, betrayed Integra. They rarely or don't mention his name nowadays. Integra forbids it. Even though she didn't outright say it, everyone knew not to say anything. For they were sure a Bullet would be through their skulls.
She vividly remembers hearing small sniffles from Integra's room at night, draws ruffling in the dead of night. She pictured that Integra was simply looking back on old photos. The poor woman... the war did something to everyone; it scared everyone.
The two sat there in comfortable silence, each in their own little world.
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A week later.
A week has passed, and Seras keeps a close eye on Integra, practically stalking the woman. Secretly following her when she left the manor to attend to business, or making it seem that they bumped into each other "randomly."
Integra is in her office, sitting down comfortably behind her desk. Occupied with a chest match against herself. Her thoughts drift to Seras. 'Maybe... I should call her to play a match with me.'
She made a move, and won, white, won. She smiled weakly. In any match she played with herself, white always seemed to win. She turned her gaze to her calendar.
Thursday, March 14, 2052.
They've come a long way. As she stared at the calendar, her mind drifted to the war back in 99'. How their forces kept reducing, how England's people were being massacred. It still pains her after all these years. Those innocent people who died, all because of a war-crazed man. She sighed. Walter's betrayal had to be one of the most heartbreaking moments she witnessed that day, Alucard's separation second.
She lost a second father that day. A friend, a comrade. She remembers the nights she'd silently cry and have nightmares. Both Walter and Alucard. She looked back on the countless pictures she and Walter had taken together in her childhood. The same ones where her father was alive, and the ones after where Alucard came into the picture.
She wouldn't admit it, but she never thought she'd grow to like Alucard. He always annoyed her when she was a child. She seriously hated him and called him names. Though eventually she matured and started to loosen up a bit.
She remembered how Walter would plead to her to just give the vampire a chance, after all, he saved her life when she was 12.
She smiles. Content with her life. Not a single regret. She lived her life how she imagined at the ripe age st 16. No kids, no husband or lover. Just business.
And now, her life is coming to an end. It's a sad thought. Dying and leaving.. all her life's work behind. In the face of death, he never dared to waver, kept a cool head, and ran with rational thoughts. She always thought she'd be killed.
It was kill or be killed. She chose the former. To think that she will die a peaceful death.. brings her a slight relief. She has time to prepare and bid her goodbyes to ones she held close. But it's not so simple, is it? She'll be gone forever– living in their thoughts rent-free. The only place she'll truly exist after death.
She sighed. How was she to bid Seras goodbye? Their relationship blossomed beautifully after the war. She experienced for the first time what it felt like to have a close friend.
"That's..enough." She said to herself. She could feel her face about to twist into emotions that she rarely saw the light. She packed up the chessboard and its pieces, setting them down on the bottom of her shelf.
She exited her office, unaware of where to go, but her feet dragged her away anyway. Closely her door quietly, she looks around the hall. Servants all around, cleaning and gossiping. Laughter and secrecy. She smiled sadly; only very few times could she let herself go and live freely.
Her feet dragged her to countless rooms in the manor, the kitchen, Walter's old room, the library, the round tables meeting room, and lastly, her father's Study.
She opened the door and stood still. Dust and cobwebs had invaded the room, making it their own. She stepped inside, the old wooden floor creaking beneath each step; While the whole manor had been renovated, a few rooms remained the same, and this room was one of them.
She stopped at his desk; it's still the same. Nothing changed. Identical to the one in her office, dark oak with fancy designs etched into the wood. Her frail fingers brushed across the picture of both her and her father. And another only with her father and Mother. Those two were inseparable before Integra came; she could hear it in her father's voice anytime she spoke about her late mother.
"Your mother..uhm.. Unfortunately had passed away when she gave birth to you, Integra."
Those were the words of her father. At age four, she learned why she didn't have a mother. She didn't feel sad about it, but she paid her respects at the grave, and often wished her a happy birthday at times.
"I have no doubt... that you were an incredible woman." She gently caressed the picture of her mother, beautiful dark brown hair and those gorgeous light brown eyes. Her golden brown skin that radiated in the sun.
Integra smiled and put the picture back in its place. Leaving the room as it was when she entered, stuck in time.
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