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When Rafe starts ignoring him, it takes Nate a while to notice. It’s not that he doesn’t pay attention – if anything, all his attention goes to Rafe – but he apparently doesn’t pay attention to the right things. It’s hard to pay attention to those when he’s on the other side of the world, chasing treasures and lost cities.
The things he has noticed, for example, is the way Rafe’s pale green eyes shine when they’ve found just a sliver of clue, when it starts to rain or when Nate shuffles closer to him, gives him a soft little kiss when he gets frustrated. How good he looks when his hair isn’t in its usual style, but it’s messy and soft and beautiful. How the stubble on his chin accentuates his jawline, tempting Nate to just pepper it with kisses and rub his cheek against it. He notices how much he misses Rafe, how much he wishes he was still in the cathedral with him, that he wants to hug and kiss Rafe until he’s sure that Rafe actually believes that Nate loves him too.
All in all, he notices a lot.
The fact that Rafe ignores him, however, goes unnoticed until he’s done with El Dorado and has some time to think and breathe. There were no packages, no letters, no calls or texts or mails. He worries.
He worries so much that he spends the next month continuously calling, texting, mailing, trying everything he can think of to reach Rafe. He goes back to Scotland, to the cathedral, in order to search him out but Rafe isn’t there either. Either something happened or Rafe just doesn’t like Nate anymore and goes to the extreme to ignore him.
The last thought stings.
He throws himself into his work. City after city, treasure after treasure. He gives everything he has, and then some. The times he almost dies and the times where he gets injured are the only times he allows himself to think of Rafe. Otherwise it would hurt too much.
And then Elena, his best friend, who is almost like a sister to him, suggests that they should marry. Nate is confused, because everything between them has only ever been platonic. When Elena explains the pressure her father puts on her to marry, how her parents are blatantly ignoring what she wants, he agrees. It’s not like he has someone else waiting for him anyway, and he would do anything in order to make Elena happy.
Their marriage is fine. They agree to start living a normal live, they go to family gatherings together and they buy a house. There’s no romantic feelings involved, no kisses or intimacy or sex, but that’s something that only they know. They don’t care. That’s not why they married each.
Just when Nate thinks that this is it, this is what his life is going to continue as, Sam comes back. With great stories of escaping prison, Hector Alcázar, finally finishing what they started years and years ago. He can’t help but be pulled back into the adventure.
Elena supports him, even though she does so reluctantly. He tells her immediately, refuses her help when she offers, and suddenly it feels like nothing changed. Like he’s still a young twenty-something, trying to finish his mother’s research with his brother.
And then Rafe is there, telling him that Hector Alcázar died six months ago, and Nate doesn’t know whether to be happy, sad or disappointed. In Sam, in Rafe, in himself. He stands there, trying to decide what to do, and he just doesn’t know.
And then he looks at Rafe, really looks at him, and he sees that same shine that he did years ago. Something in him relaxes – Rafe doesn’t hate him – and he knows. Whatever it was, whatever it is that made Rafe go away, they can still be okay.
He thinks about Elena. He feels sorry, if only slightly, for going against her plan. But then he remembers Nadine Ross, how she wasn’t fazed with any guys at all and how well the two of them would fit together.
He thinks that Elena won’t mind him choosing for his own happiness if he can grant her a little bit in return.