Chapter Text
He never knew his heart could beat so fast. Kasen had to do all he could to keep it from pounding right out of his chest. The palpitations made his blood rush to his pale visage, setting him on the verge of heartfelt tears. His life just changed for the best and every pound of his accelerated heartbeat nudged him closer and closer to running out the door to scream him happiness to the heavens. Goodness he wanted to tell Shokudaikiri. They’ve waited so long and now he just wanted to run and find him and-
No. Not yet. He couldn’t tell him just yet. He had to announce it. It was the only way a sword of elegance like himself could do something like this. So, he stopped in his tracks and thought for a moment. Today was Tuesday. He had to give himself time to plan something special. How long would he need? He wanted at least a week and he could make sure he could get Shokudaikiri alone.
Thursday came into his mind. So that evening in the kitchen as his love was over a pot of broth, Kasen simply asked, “Do you have any plans for next Thursday evening?”
“Next Thursday?” Shokudaikiri echoed as he stirred the liquid around, letting some of the steam rise across his structured jaw. “Aside from this as we always do, I don’t have anything planned.”
Kasen continued mincing the onions on his cutting board. “You don’t have any plans with Tsurumaru or Taikogane or anyone?”
“Well, you are oddly nosey today, aren’t you?” he played, with no more intention than to tease his lover. He’s been asking him a lot of questions this evening. A bit uncharacteristic of his cherished Kasen.
“I just miss you, that’s all,” Kasen said calmly as he finished chopping, refusing to let his hidden excitement onto the Tachi. He put the knife down and took hold of the cutting board and walked over to his lover’s side so he could drop the vegetable pieces into the bubbling broth.
“Miss me?” he crooned as he pulled Kasen into his arms as soon as he was in arms reach. “Seeing me everyday isn’t enough for you?”
Kasen lurched into his grasp. “Careful! I’m going to drop onion everywhere-”
“No you’re not,” he murmured into Kasen’s ear before placing a soft kiss upon the outer rim of his ear. Slowly he began to sway side to side and Kasen could not help but follow with the soft motion. “Now, about this proposition: you say you want to make special time for just the two of us this Thursday?”
“Only if you’d like.”
“Well, if you want to make it so special, why don’t we ask someone else to take over for dinner that night? We’ll take our dinner to our room, and eat alone. Sound good?”
Kasen was glad he suggested it first. “That’s a nice idea.”
The rest of the evening and the evenings following went as they always did. They took care of their daily duties and cooked every night. Three days passed from that Tuesday, making it Friday. He had a little less than a week left until their date, and Kasen decided he was going to write a poem for Shokudaikiri. He already wrote the poem about four times. It was all he could think about. Cooking diner he would recite the verses over and over again in his head. Making him in a constant state of preoccupation. Should it be obvious? Should it be vague? What would make it perfect? Every moment he had, he wrote and rewrote because it had to be perfect. Something like this was so special, especially for them considering all they have been through to get here.
He told Shokudaikiri he wanted to spend their night beneath the tree. That was when he was going to give him the poem. It was March, so the tree may not be blooming as Kasen would have dreamed, but that would not matter. It didn’t matter so much where they were as to what he had to say.
Finally Thursday came, but the sky was dark for the entire day. The greyness of the day forced Kasen’s heart into his throat. It looked like it was going to rain. Actually, it was going to rain. He prayed and prayed it would wait until after they had their evening together or at least until after he could give him the poem. He even would have taken it before their allotted time; the petrichor in the air could have added something quite romantic to the night. But of course, such a thing did not ensue.
They took their dinner to their room as they planned, and soon after they finished Kasen insisted they get a move on their evening. Shokudaikiri suggested that maybe they should just stay inside tonight or move it to another day. After all, they did not need to be beneath the branches to have a nice night together. But Kasen was absolutely steadfast, and he knew better than to fight Kasen on something he was persistent on. He loved him more than anything, but he can be quite stubborn sometimes. Thankfully he loved him enough to deal with it on a daily basis. Nevertheless, he could not believe Kasen wanted to take the risk of being caught in a torrential downpour just to sit outside.
“Looks like the skies could open up any second,” Shokudaikiri pointed out as they trudged up the hill.
“Oh, ye of little faith,” was all he said.
“It’s not faith, Kasen. It’s the weather-”
“Shokudaikiri, please,” Kasen accidently snapped. Shokudaikiri shut up right away, which gave Kasen a little bit if guilt. But if he wasn’t so steadfast, their privacy would be tarnished due to the oncoming storm; the citadel would be filled with swords, eliminating whatever privacy they had, and that was really important for this.
In silence they made it to the base of the tree. They both turned around to overlook the field back at the citadel. It was practically silent, minus the whistling winds of the oncoming storm. Other than that, it was just them and the quiet. Complete and beautiful privacy.
Kasen gazed over to the dimly lit citadel windows, but his focus was on the humble paper beneath his robe. It weighed heavily like a stone on his chest for now was the time to tell him. He was not nervous before, but now that the time came he felt his hand start to tremble.
“I have to say, this privacy is lovely.” Shokudaikiri turned to see Kasen with a distant gaze and how he flinched when he spoke. “Are you alright? You’ve seemed preoccupied lately.”
Kasen did not answer directly. Instead he abruptly reached into the flap of his robe and handed the paper to the man beside him. “This is for you.”
“A poem, huh? Is this what’s been keeping you so occupied?” he said with a grin, thinking of it as nothing more but one if his occasional romantic gestures.
“More or less.”
Shokudaikiri did not outwardly question his curtness. Instead he read the poem silently to himself:
A Heart and a Soul,
A Kiss and a Wish,
A Bond that is mine
And mine to cherish.
For flowers to bloom
And spring to thrive,
Naught is needed more
Than love at one’s side.
I as a sprout,
And You as my warmth,
Adoration become
The source of my growth.
Then as warm springs pollinate
And as blossoms bear fruit,
It was just about time
Our bond grew someone new.
We were just a heart and a soul
And just a Kiss and a Wish.
But the bond that was mine
Is no longer mine alone to cherish.
Coming to the last verse, he took a long ponder about it. It was very rare for Kasen to refer to himself directly in a poem, which meant he was trying to tell him something. This was more than just a gesture, but a message. He reread it, and his heart skipped a beat. He wasn’t sure exactly what he was trying to say… But he had a sneaking suspicion about something. Something deep within him knew what this was about. He was just unsure because he thought they swore to forget this fantasy, this dream that they could never seem to grasp despite their greatest efforts. This fact was always looming above them but now... Could it be that maybe they could bear that hope again?
“Kasen, this is beautiful… but…”
Kasen cut him off. He did not look at Shokudaikiri as he turned to face him, or even as he tenderly took both of Shokudaikiri’s gloved hands. He did not mind the paper that wrinkled beneath his grasp as he guided the warm palms down between the two of their statuesque bodies. He let the satin silence of the cooling evening build for a moment as he took a clean, crystalline inhale. Even when he felt a raindrop pat against his sleeve, he still built his confidence. Slowly he looked into Shokudaikiri’s glinting iris with a misty smile and told him what he had been waiting to tell him for so long now…
“I’m pregnant, Kiri.”
The raindrops began their consecutive fall to the Earth below. Shokudaikiri’s jaw lay agape as he watched the fresh raindrops stream down the side of Kasen’s blushing and beaming face. The cold water began to soak his black locks as the raindrops just got heavier and heavier with every passing moment. He tried to speak, but all he could manage were those shaky, wordless breaths as he stared into Kasen’s melting aqua eyes. Three years. After waiting for so long, something like this was just a fantasy, a hopeless dream. But now…
“Kasen!” The exploding warmth in his heart urged him to throw his arms around his lover and by the hips he lifted Kasen into his arms, spinning around in a circle as the rain pounded against their skin. Kasen huffed in surprise as he threw his hands to Shokudiakiri’s shoulders and let out a blissfully emotional laugh. He could not tell if it was because of the growing downpour, but he could see something drip from Shokudaikiri’s eye, and it just made his heart pound and he could not stop his smiles. Set back down on the ground, Shokudaikiri pulled him into a fervent kiss as the rain made their clothes heavy and plastered their soft locks to their heads.
“Kasen, I can’t believe it.” He said loud enough to compete with the heavy downpour. Shokudaikiri rubbed his palm against his soft cheek, and Kasen leaned into it affectionately. “Are you absolutely sure?”
He looked up to his lover and gave a heartfelt laugh that made the tears he was holding onto for the past week finally stream along with the rain. Shokudaikiri’s own euphoria was a reminder of how blessed this was. “Yes. I’m sure.”
They didn't care about the rain. They didn't care how wet their clothes were. All that mattered was that they were just given a second chance, and Shokudaikiri just pulled him into his warmth.
“I promise I’ll be careful, Kiri,” Kasen murmured into his chest. “I won’t mess it up this time.”
“That wasn’t your fault,” Shokudaikiri insisted as they held each other in the rain. “Let’s just focus on this, alright? Because this…” he pulled back and placed his hands on Kasen’s sides, “ This is wonderful.” Kasen’s hair was starting to fall into his eyes, so he took the moment to brush it back for him. “How long has it been?”
“I only found out last week. I… I had a strange feeling, so I decided to take the test and…” Kasen had to wipe his sleeve across his eyes to see him clearly. “I was so shocked it came back positive, I wanted to run out and tell you right away but… I wanted to announce it to you properly because…” he paused and squoze his hand. “Because I have a good feeling about this.”
He smiled. “I do too.” And he pulled Kasen back into his arms. “Hey,” he said abruptly, still yelling to have his voice reach over the pattering raindrops. “With your condition, you shouldn’t be out in the cold, wet rain.” And without any permission from Kasen, he swung him up into his arms, making him let out a playful scold. Bridal-style Shokudaikiri carried him back to the citadel as fast as he could manage as they continued to be pounded by the unrelenting rain. Even so, their gaiety was beyond controllable, which gave them many questioning glances as they came through the citadel doors. They were soaked and dripping water everywhere, but their smiles remained bright. Their fellow swords never got a straight answer for why they were in such a blissful state, so they were left to assume they were just in a casual lover’s state of happiness.
The pair hoped that one day they could share their happiness with the world too, but now wasn’t the time. So until then they would just relish in this just the two of them. Hopefully this would finally give them the future they always wanted.