Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It had been a horribly slow night, one that seemed to drag on forever. It was filled with the occasional child with an ear piercingly painful ear infection that just couldn’t wait until tomorrow and some adults who were drunk stupid and been thrown inside by police officers with a request of ‘just make sure they don’t die.’

Other then that there was nothing. It was exasperating, she hated working the ER. It was always rather so busy that there wasn’t even a chance to pee or there was nothing to do but try and balance the shitty ballpoint pens they handed out on their ends and tip them over like dominoes.   

She had wanted something to happen, anything to cure her from this horrible boredom of sitting behind the desk clicking random keys hoping something new on the monitor would pop up. Of course everytime she found herself thinking like that she always ended up regretting it. The whole ‘knock on wood’ thing seemed arbitrary and stupid but whenever she failed to do it it always ended up like this.

It was 2:21 AM when she heard some of the nurses screaming and running into the back room, the sound of their tearfilled voiced muffled by the shit they had bumped into falling and shattering into a messy heap on the floor. The feelings of annoyance and concern were fighting for dominance in her heart. Whatever caused them to be so worried was definitely serious, but was it serious enough to knock over a million files and a set of blood samples and create a biohazard on there floor?

Standing up with a loud sigh she pushed her chair back in and grabbed a pair of gloves out of the line of boxes strapped to the wall. The latex slapped against her skin as she snapped them on, years of wearing them and she still cringed every time she felt the fresh power they were filled with in between her fingers.

As she kneeled in front of the mess with an old roll of paper towels and biohazard bucket she gently scooped up the glass shards and slipped them in. It would’ve a been a rather simple mess if it weren’t for the fact that the blood had stained a bunch of files that would now have to be rewritten. The very thought of the hours of work they now had made her head throb.

“...Should we call the police?” Her ears perked up as she overheard one of nurse’s nervous voice. Looking over towards her coworker with interested eyes she watched as he nervously twisted his hands together and shifted on his feet. He looked like he was trying to stay rational but the fear was overcoming him and making his shoulders shake.

“I mean, I’m not going back out there until he’s gone.” The nurse who had been the one to knock over the majority of the mess on the floor said it firmly, shaking her head and crossing her arms to reaffirm her point. Standing up from her spot on the floor she rolled off her gloves, her interest was now thoroughly peaked.

She wanted to know what was out there.

Walking over to the door that sat in between the waiting room and the main center of the ER she peeked out the little window at the top, careful not to show too much of her face and alert the man’s attention.

Immediately she grew confused. The guy looked a bit crazed sure, his hair was matted and greasy and he was looking around wildly for a nurse or a receptionist, anyone that could help him with whatever was going on. There wasn’t anything that particularly alerted her or made her think he was dangerous. He just looked scared, and that wasn’t anything unusual to see in a ER. Most people came in thinking they were dying or something.

It wasn’t until she stood up more that she saw what had scared her coworkers. This man was naked. Fully nude standing in there waiting room and letting it all hang out. The blood drained out of her face as she took a shaky step back. Maybe her coworker was right, maybe they should call 911. Keep all the patients with them in in the backroom until they could get someone to drag him out.

In fact she was pretty sure that was the right thing to do, at least until she noticed that his nakedness wasn’t the only weird thing going on with him.

Things only got more confusing when she noticed that the man was clutching onto a limp slip of a man that was covered in drying blood. She had opened the door before she could even consider if it was a good idea or not, ignoring the yells of her coworkers she made her way towards the odd couple.

Her heart leapt into her throat when the man caught her eye and looked towards her with an intense desperation.

She tried to ignore all the fear racing through her veins as she kept pushing forward. She didn’t need to get any closer to know the man in this guy’s arms was dying and someone needed to help him.

As she finally got close enough that they’d be able to address each other without yelling across the room she took a deep breath. This was it, she was 3 feet in front of a guy who had run downtown stark naked to get to an ER. Looking up at him with all the strength she could muster she was shocked at what she saw.

The dude was crying. He looked like a kicked puppy. He whimpered slightly and shakily extended his arms as if he was offering the dying man to her. Begging her to take the man and make him better. It made her uncomfortable and made her heart twinge at the same time. There was something about this guy that she might dare to call cute.. To say it was unexpected was an understatement.

Not only was the fact that he was naked enough to think he’d stay firmly in the ‘creep’ column but she never would of thought she’d look at a man as scary looking as this guy and think ‘cute’. Shaking her head she tried to reorganize her thoughts. This was not what she should be thinking about right now.

Looking down at the guy in the man’s arms she tried to ignore the fact that she was also being forced to stare at the man’s copper tan chest that was crusted with gummy old blood. The guy in his arms was actually in better condition then she was expecting, most of the blood seemed to not even be his.

Still he was in critical condition, his skin was pale enough to be tinged blue and his chest was only barely twitching with breaths. Reaching down to undo his coat and see if the injuries were any worse underneath the giant fluffy cover of white he was hiding in the man holding him jumped in surprise, ripping him away from her hands.

She jumped herself, almost having a heart attack with how badly he had scared her. As soon as he realized what he had done he began stuttering over apologizes, his tears starting back up and making his voice sound wet and mucusy. Annoyance started to bubble in her chest.

It was becoming very apparent that this guy wasn’t anyone to be scared of and as she realized it she found herself growing irritated with how difficult he was making things. However his violent reaction made her realize she was letting her curiosity take control. She needed to get them checked in and into the back before she could start inspecting the man for wounds.

“It no problem, we need to get him checked in first anyway. Can you tell me what happened?” The man looked horribly scared by that question. Like answering that was going to reveal something terribly shameful. Immediately the nurse found herself growing worried as well. Oh god what had happened? Was she about to hear something that would make her question humanity as a whole?

She supposed she should’ve expected that though, if a guy comes running in stark naked with a smaller guy looking guy passed out in his arms crying his fucking heart out nothing good could’ve just happened. Her nose sorta wrinkled and she forced herself to keep a smile as her mind ran wild with everything that could’ve brought these boys here.

“I- We- There was- I don’t know what happened! There was so much blood! I think he’s dying!” The nurse paused for a second trying to decode the word vomit the man had just unloaded on her. The so much blood thing made sense, there was so much coating both of them it made her wonder if there was more people involved. There was no way all of that had come from the two of them, was there? It didn’t even look like the bigger guy was bleeding. If the guy passed out had been where all that blood had come from then he was in far worse shape then he looked.

“Okay can I get a name?” Relief washed over the man’s face as those words fell out of her lips. She had to wonder if she was relieved they were going to treat the other man or if he was glad she wasn’t going to question him any further. A shiver went up her spine with that thought. Gross…

“Akira Fudo.” His voice sounded so nasally, immediately after speaking he sniffed and there was a horrible mucus-y noise that made her want to gag. This guy really was a mess. Sighing she moved to enter a new entry onto the hospital’s computer system.

“Uhm, and his?” As weird as this guy was being he wasn’t as scary as she had been expecting. He really seemed more like a lost kid than anything else.

“Ryo Asuka, please tell me you can fix him!” Typing in the patient’s name her fingers paused over the keys for a second. That name felt familiar… Where had she heard that name before? The kid made another gross sniffling noise and she was brought back to attention.

“He’ll be fine, uh can you tell me your…” She turned a bright red as her words trailed into nothingness near the end. He cocked his head in confusion at her sudden silence. Clearing her throat she looked back at him with firm eyes, getting herself ready to ask the question that she had been pushing to the back of her mind this whole time.

“Can you tell me what your relationship is?” The man’s face froze for a second, he seemed to be stuck in processing the question. It looked like he was at a complete loss of what to do and the nurse felt her mouth quirk up in a pitying smile.

“We need to know for visitation rights.” He seemed to finally remember he was currently in a conversation after that and looked around awkwardly before answering in a hushed voice.

“Oh, Uh… He’s my best friend.” She sighed out her nose at that, turning back to the computer and entering in with only a bit of pity. He must be too scared to come out to a stranger like this. Looking at the text entry of ‘Best Friend’ she looked back at them for a second. She didn’t want this guy to get rejected from visiting the other…

Backspacing she typed in ‘Boyfriend’ before hitting enter as fast as she could, praying he didn’t see she had changed what it had said. Standing up she grabbed a clipboard for new entries and began to move back towards the door, opening it and holding it with her side for the man in front of her to enter.

“Uh, so you can come back with us, and we can get you something to… uh something to wear.” The man’s face exploded into a bright red as she said that. Had he really forgotten he was naked at some point? He looked horribly embarrassed, he fidgeted and shifted as if he was trying to shrink and disappear behind his smaller ‘friend’.

Huffing a laugh out her nose she watched as he bolted in through the door and pressed himself against the wall as he waited for her next instructions.

Chapter Text

Akira sighed, while he was glad to finally have clothes on he couldn’t help but be jittery with nerves. How was Ryo? What were they doing to him? When was he going to get to see him again? Would he be okay? Could they fix him completely?

These thoughts whirled in his mind along with the grotesque memories of all the corpses piled high at the sabbath; the disfigured and destroyed demons and humans all laying haphazardly, unmoved from where they fell. There had been a disgusting haze in the air as the rampage, as his rampage finally stilled.

All the blood staining his hands and teeth dripped off in wet clumps as he shrunk back down to size. His hands shook with a bit of a tremor as he realized what had happened, what he had done. Even back to normal he could tell he wasn’t really ‘normal’ at all anymore.

His fingers were long and spindly now, curled down ever so slightly like claws. His skin had darkened a few shades and the floor felt further away then it once had. Breaths huffed out of him turning into little hiccups before he remembered something very very important.

The reason he had stopped running in the first place. The reason he had turned around from his spot inches away from the door that would lead him to freedom. The reason he was like this.

Ryo.

Suddenly each face on the corpses around him became distinctly clearer. He ran through the piles desperately looking in between every human looking corpse he found for the blonde. There was no way… He had gone back for him… He had turned into this for him…

He couldn’t die… He couldn’t! Ripping some of the piles apart to check every cranny he could he was surprised at how easily he could throw them, at how far back the flew with the smallest amount of force he gave.

Every time he saw a hint of blonde he felt his heart constrict until he was able to confirm they weren’t who he was looking for. God. Where had he left him? Why had he left him!? He had done this to protect the other after he had gotten trapped.

Digging back into his memories had remembered how Ryo had gotten surrounded, cut off from Akira’s side and backed into a corner. Within seconds his gun was out, tearing down the demons around him. There was so many that before long the gun began to smoke and click.

Akira had still been running, he hadn’t bothered to check if Ryo was okay until he heard the gun fire stop. When he turned around he felt pure dread climb up his throat and choke him. Ryo was still surrounded, Akira watched as he looked around desperately for something else, anything else to protect himself with.

And then that demon had come down on him. Crushing his beneath it's feathery mass and making Ryo scream. Ryo wasn’t a guy who made any unplanned noises, everything he said or yelled was always obviously, infuriatingly planned. But now he yelled, making noises that were clearly being forced out of him with pain.

Akira wasn’t as much of a dumbass as most people thought, he knew he had no chance of saving Ryo from the fate that most of the party goers had already met tonight. But he still turned around. He used every bit of force he had to push himself forward. Each of his steps used his foot as a springboard as he ran as fast as he could towards his childhood friend.

He thought for a second he’d make it, that he’d at least be able to die holding Ryo’s hand. But then he felt the presence of a demon that had caught sight of him, one that was far faster than his puny human body could ever dream of going. Tears bubbled out of his eyes as he tried to make it, to at least get to Ryo before it swallowed him whole.

Instead everything froze.

Suddenly his body wasn’t moving how he wanted it to, no matter how hard he tried to push forward he stayed still as stone. He could hear the demon’s legs hitting the floor rapidly as it scrambled up behind him, he wanted to sob, to scream that this wasn’t fair but he couldn’t even do that.

When his body finally started moving again he found that he didn’t go to run again. He just turned to face the centipede like demon head on and… he tore it. Like it was nothing more than a piece of paper it split beneath his grasp and poured blood everywhere.

Akira had always been queasy, the sight of the golden yellow blood raining down around him should’ve made him vomit. But instead he laughed. He wasn’t in control of himself anymore. When he finally threw the pieces of the demons mulated corpse down he had turned towards where he had been running, towards Ryo, and licked his lips.

Akira couldn’t deny the fear that shot up his spine with that. He had no idea what he was going to do, he had no control over himself right now. His feet came down in booming foot falls as he walked towards a wide eyed Ryo who was staring up at him with… what seemed almost like pride?

He wanted to yell at Ryo to get away, even though he knew Ryo obviously couldn’t pinned like he was. That was the whole reason this had happened. As he grew closer and closer to blonde, who he couldn’t help but notice looked absolutely tiny now, he felt his dread grow.

He had only been one step away when his attention ripped elsewhere. A demon somewhere behind him had begun messily eating a screaming woman, Akira turned to the sound of wet slurping and crying dying down into wet gurgles and then silence.

The demon noticed him and wiped it's mouth, hopping around a bit before taking notice of Ryo, who at this point was probably the only human still alive here. It's tail wagged a bit above it before starting to run over with crazed eyes.

For the first time since this weird changed he felt his body move to his own command. He grabbed the demon and lifted it up like it was nothing more than a stuffed animal. He could’ve killed it mercifully, could’ve smothered it under his hand with how small it was. But his anger wouldn’t of been appeased by that.

He saw how it was looking at Ryo, he knew what it had wanted to do to him. There wasn’t nothing remotely merciful about the way he slaughtered the beast. It's torn open corpse hit the floor dully as Akira licked his blood stained hand.

It didn’t take long after that for him to forget what he was doing. Why he was here, why he was this demon. At first he only killed the demons that got close to Ryo, desperate to kill the last remaining human that was so perfectly defenseless pinned to the floor like that.

But after a few tastes of blood, a few tastes of the power of feeling a demon die beneath his claws he lost control. It wasn’t until he was out of it, until he was finally in the body he was familiar with… or at least more familiar with. Did he realize how wild he had gotten.

There didn’t seem to be anything living left. He wandered around the piles of corpses and didn’t see a hint of life. When he finally found the stage looking area he had lost Ryo at, complete with the limp body of the black demon bird and broke out into a sprint.

He was shocked at how much faster he was, within a second he was at the steps, staring up at the hint of white that was practically enveloped by the black feathers around him. He almost didn’t want to go up there. He was far too scared of what he’d see.

His legs easily took the steps 2 at a time, he moved up to where Ryo was laying before falling to his knees. He brushed the feathers gently away from Ryo’s face. Akira’s mind halted. Acid climbed up his throat. Ryo was so pale he looked almost blue. Even worse was that Akira couldn’t see any indication that he was breathing.

Ripping the demon corpse off of Ryo he had thrown it against the wall with vengeance. His breaths came out in angry huffs and tears dripped down his face. His anger didn’t last long however, he was still far too concerned to beat up the already dead demon more.

Floppin back down onto the floor he grabbed at Ryo, cradling the bundle of white in his arms he wondered if Ryo was always this small… He looked so much more fragile, so much weaker then he had before… was it because he was wounded? Placing his hands as gently as he could against the blonde’s neck he held his breath as he waited to hear a heartbeat.

A second passed.

Then two.

And then there was a beat.

He almost slumped down with relief. Oh god… Oh thank God. He was still alive. The relief was only momentary though, he knew the boy in his arms was still fading fast. Collecting himself as best as he could he stood up, making sure Ryo was firmly in his arms and he ran.

That’s how he ended up here. On this uncomfortable plastic seat staring at an empty exam bed with a glare fiercer then he could’ve ever dreamed of making before now. He hadn’t been able to shut up his mind since they took Ryo.

Everything from a horrifying replay of the nightmare they just lived, to the embarrassment that he had ran in here naked, to the worry that they wouldn’t be able to save Ryo and he’d really be left alone after all of that looped endlessly through his mind.

The hardest part to handle was the idea that Ryo was really going to die. Akira had to hold back a sob as his mind reminded him Ryo could already be dead at this point and he’d have no idea. That Ryo’s last moments would be spent surrounded by a bunch of unknown doctors because Akira had left.

Clawing his hands through his hair he choked on sobs. Without Ryo, what would he even do? Without the blonde everything just seemed so much more pointless.

Akira’s heart had leapt into his throat when Ryo had ran onto the dock just hours ago. He had wanted to cry he was so happy. So long Ryo had been gone, so long he had gotten nothing but letters from the blonde.

It was disgustingly familiar of his relationship with his parents.

But, the fact that Ryo had come back, that the blonde trusted him to help with his life’s work… That was something his parents never gave him, no matter how badly he wanted it. He was, for the first time since Ryo had left, being seen as someone worthy…  

Life wouldn’t be so cruel to rip that away the second he was given a taste, would it?

“Fudo-san?” Snapped out of his thoughts he looked towards the opened door, surprised to see a nurse had come in at some point. Blinking dumbly he cocked his head in a silent question.

“You can see him now.” He was up on his feet before he had even consciously processed her words. Apparently his sudden movement scared the nurse, who clutched her clipboard to her chest and stumbled back into the hall.

“Where? Where is he?” Following her out he grabbed onto either of her shoulders, he couldn’t bring himself to care about how he was acting, to feel bad about how he was scaring her. He needed to know, he needed to see the other. He needed to feel his heartbeat and know he wasn’t being left alone.

“D-down in room number 12?” He didn’t wait for her to lead him or help him find his way or anything, he was all but running the second the number was said. As each room passed him by he couldn’t help but grit his teeth in annoyance. Why was there so many rooms? Why was number 12 not right next to him? How far had they taken him?

When he finally found the room he swung the door open hard enough that the hinges loosened slightly under his grasp. He really was too strong for his own good now, wasn’t he? Slamming it back closed behind him he ignored how the door didn’t close right anymore and ran up to the curtains, pulling them away fast enough that they kept fluttering for a bit even after he had let go.

Ryo was laying there, a furrowed glare on his face that melted into the kind and warm expression he saved for Akira. Diving onto the bed he grabbed onto the blonde and held him as tightly as he could, burying his face into the crook of the others neck and kicking his legs up until he was entirely on the other’s hospital bed.

The other’s heartbeat made him want to cry, the way his breath tickled his ear made his heart soar. He was alive, oh thank god he was alive. Ryo’s arm, the one that didn’t get squished between Akira and the bed, held him back and clenched onto the weird paper like shirt they had given him. His arm wasn’t as encompassing as Akira remembered it being, it no longer fit all the way around him like it once had but it was there. It wasn’t limp like it was last night.

Tears bubbled out of his eyes hot and wet as they poured down his face. His back shaked with his sobs and he could only cry harder when Ryo started to rub his back comfortingly. All the thoughts he had, the ones that were sure to come up later, the questions he had about what he’d do now that he was devilman… They were all forgotten. Right now all that mattered was that they were alive, that they had both made it out in one piece.

Pressing himself further into the other he breathed in Ryo’s scent of gunpowder, lemon and some flower Akira knew he’d never be able to identify, mixed with the hospital like scent that surrounded them. It was soothing enough that he felt as if he could fall asleep like that, deep in Ryo’s grasp safe and warm…

For a second he thought he would. But then he heard a horribly strangled squeak of pain as he shifted his weight weirdly on the now smaller boy. Immediately feeling a wave of guilt come over him and reluctantly pulled away. He knew he should probably get completely off the others bed and move to one of the chairs that had been placed near the bed. The ones he was probably meant to be sitting on.

He wanted to give the other room, to make sure he didn’t make the damage on Ryo any worse than it already was but he found he couldn’t. It was already painful enough to be not right up against the blonde. After everything that happened he didn’t want to be even an inch apart from the other.  

He’d tried to make himself feel better by thinking that at least this way they could see each other face to face, but really it was all just ways to distract himself from squishing the other underneath himself again. There was so much about this new body that he had to get used to, for his own sake and others. Not smothering Ryo was the first problem he had run into but he was sure there was going to be many more in the future.

Suddenly he remembered the door not 5 feet behind them he had broken just minutes ago. Okay, maybe this wasn’t the first problem he ran into, but it was the first he really cared about. Realizing that he had yet to say anything to Ryo he turned bright red. God, what could he even say though?

His mouth opened for a second with a lame drawl of ‘uhhh’ before he finally found the words he wanted to say.

“Ryo I- I was so scared you died… I don’t know what I’d do without you.” He didn’t think he could go any redder but as he finished what he said he found himself practically steaming from the ears. Ryo didn’t seem phased though, he just chuckled ever so slightly before he responded.

“I won’t die Akira, I need to stay here and take care of you don’t I?” Nodding his head he sniffled pathetically. Ryo smiled a bit, he was looking up at Akira with slightly lidded eyes. One of his hands came up to caress the side of Akira’s face, and a slight flush of red started to grace Ryo’s features.

“You’re so much bigger now…” Ryo ran his fingers over Akira’s cheek with wide fascinated eyes. Akira couldn’t help but blush. Was he really that much bigger? He could tell the moment he went back to normal that he was tanner, buffer and taller than usual but he didn’t know it was by enough that other people would take notice.

“Is that a bad thing?” Ryo hummed shaking his head and letting his eyes drift closed. He continued to hum as he moved his hand upwards to pet at Akira’s hair. Going so far to scratch it every once in a while like he was petting a dog. There was a moment Akira just sat quietly, trying to figure out why Ryo was acting so weird.

He didn’t have to wonder very long though. Out of the corner of his eyes he noticed a weird tube trailing up into an IV bag, and sure enough it connected to Ryo’s arm. Akira had to bite his lip not to laugh when he finally put together what was wrong.

Ryo was high. Completely shit faced off whatever painkillers they were pumping into him.

Immediately a million ideas ran through Akira’s head. There was so much he wanted to do, so much he wanted to try. Still… the other was pretty banged up… and he’d never forgive Akira once he was back to normal…

The mischievous part of his mind reminded him that would only apply if he even remembered this when he woke up. He didn’t manage to fight with his curiosity much longer after that. He figured it’d be best to start small though, to test the waters.

At first he just gently brushed his hand down the other’s face. He was shocked at the instantaneous reaction that had. Immediately Ryo began to chirp and chirr, nuzzling into Akira’s hand and dropping his hand from Akira’s hair to hold the hand close to himself.

Akira had to steel himself for a second. He had to physically stop himself from running out of the room screaming in overwhelment. Was he dreaming? This couldn’t be real could it? He immediately wanted to try something else, but when he moved to pull his hand away Ryo began to whine horribly. Nuzzling his face further into Akira’s hand and clutching it tight enough Akira couldn’t help but hiss a bit.

As soon as the shock of the suddenly too tight hold pasted Akira’s smile immediately came back, it crawled up the sides of his face with every dumb idea he had. Ryo was going to kill him when he remembered this… But at least at this point he knew he was already dead and might as well have fun while he could.

“Ryo you feeling alright?” He couldn’t completely hide the way his voice wavered with his attempts to not start laughing. He sort of wiggled his hand back and forth giggling at how Ryo sort of swayed back and forth with it instead of letting go.

“I’m fine… Just… Tired…” Ryo drifted a bit between each word, like he was physically struggling to stay awake for Akira. Akira felt his smile drop completely with that.

“Should I leave?” Ryo flew up from where he sat so suddenly that all Akira processed was a weird flash of white. In the sudden movements Ryo had managed to completely throw of the blanket and Akira felt his heart catch in his throat.

Ryo was wearing a random white T shirt they must’ve given them and nothing else. It wasn’t until he saw the other’s bare legs that he understood why. Gauze wrapped around his upper thighs and spotted with blood, his right leg was held together with pieces of metal and long strips of medical tape.

Bruises stained every bit of skin Akira could see, the where the IV went in was covered in tape and gauze and a weird strap that kept the blonde’s arm straight and still. It made the way Ryo was sitting look awkward and uncomfortable. Akira was pretty sure he had been trying to get into Akira’s face and bring their bodies close again but got stopped by the strap before he could get very far.

Without his jacket Ryo looked so much smaller… or was that only because Akira was bigger? Either way every mischievous thought he had of messing with Ryo because he was high flooded away in an instant and was replaced with guilt.

Ryo had almost died today. He had practically forgotten in the rush of relief and calm that had come with the other’s soft touches and reassurance.   

“Don’t leave Akira… Please don’t leave me here.” He had no idea how long they were going to let him stay here, but like hell he was going to tell Ryo that. If Ryo wanted him here he’d stay here until they dragged him out.

He had a good feeling Ryo was going to tell him to leave before that happened though. As much as Akira hated to admit it, he knew the only reason Ryo was saying all of this right now was because his normal sense was buried under layers of post traumatic clinginess and chemical relaxants.

“I won’t leave…” It was a promise he wanted to keep but knew he never would be able to. Not unless Ryo stopped being so goddamn stubborn. So it stayed a lie as white as Ryo’s clothes, as pure as the twinkle in their eyes.

A lie to give them a moment of rest before being thrown back into hell.