Work Text:
One: how to know if you’re gay??
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Katsuki caught himself staring at Deku’s reflection in the window during class again. This isn’t normal. Dudes don’t stare at dudes like this, especially nerds like Deku. What the h*ll is wrong with me?
“Young Bakugou, are you paying attention?” All Might asked, bringing Katsuki back to reality. Denki giggled.
“Yeah,” he grumbled, glaring daggers at the so-called ‘Bakubro’.
“Great! Continuing on…” Katsuki stopped listening again. I’m f*cked. This is NOT normal. It’s not even mutual! What the actual f*ck?! I need help. I need to get hypnotized or something. Does anyone here have a quirk that erases feelings? Or… no. No no no no no. I don’t need my sexuality erased, I’m into girls.
Girls
Girls
Girls
Girls
Girls.
That’s it. Time to Google.
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Google was of no help. The only thing Katsuki got was ‘are you gay?’ quizzes and sh*t like that. He didn’t take any. They are a complete waste of time. He did find a video with a weird looking guy summing up homosexuality in 5 minutes. He was annoying as f*ck. The only thing Katsuki got out of it was ‘if you think you like dudes, you’re gay’. What is that supposed to mean?!
Katsuki decided to just not care and forget everything that happened that day.
Two: how to get rid of fellings
Did you mean: ‘how to get rid of feelings ’
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It’s not that Katsuki had accepted that he liked Deku. It’s f*cking Deku, of course not. He’d just accepted that he had a problem and that something was wrong with him.
I just got hit with… a personality switching quirk. Yeah, some sh*t like that. My brain and heart are both just super f*cked up. I need to go to Recovery Girl and see if she can remove all quirk effects from me. Is that possible? Better be. That general studies sh*t Shinsou or whatever is probably brainwashing me. He’s probably still pissed about the sports festival or something.
No, that sh*thead Monoma copied Shinsou’s quirk and is getting revenge on class A! Bakugou’s intelligence tried telling him otherwise. What? No, of course it’s not teenage hormones! CLASS F*CKING A IS UNDER F*CKING ATTACK!
“BAKUGOU!” The spiky blonde looked up at Eijirou, who was standing over him, arms crossed and left eyebrow raised.
“What?!”
“You keep zoning out, are you okay?”
“F*cking peachy.” Katsuki suddenly felt a warm, sharp pain in his shoulder, causing him to jump up and turn around. Denki was smirking, with his finger right by where Katsuki had been ‘attacked’. Denki shrugged.
“You looked like you could use something to wake you up.” So he f*cking zapped me. I see.
“Are you getting enough sleep, Bakubro?” Mina asked, practically pouncing on him, her hands on his shoulders, as if they hadn’t been getting enough attention already. “You have this weird, dreamy look in your eyes all the time…” She drifted off, looking into Katsuki’s scarlet eyes, waiting for an answer.
Her head quickly shot up and she gasped. “Could our Bakubro be in love?!” Katsuki gnashed his teeth and snarled, standing up and pushing everyone away with some minor explosions.
“No! F*ck off, can’t I have a single day without you motherf*ckers prying into my private life? I’m not f*cking in love!” He stormed out the room and heard some nervous laughs.
“Well… that was intense!” Hanta quietly commented. F*ck. This is all Monoma, Shinsou, and f*cking Deku’s fault.
Three: how to become human rocc
Showing results for ‘how to become human rock ’
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Not like sh*tty hair, Katsuki silently told himself. Um… how to hide emotions? How to hide your true feelings? HOW TO HIDE THE FACT THAT YOU’RE IN LOVE BECAUSE NO MATTER WHAT YOU TELL YOURSELF YOU FEEL LIKE YOU’RE LYING TO YOURSELF AND THAT YOU PROBABLY ARE IN LOVE??
F*ck. Deku really f*cked up my life.
Why does he have to be so annoyingly, disgustingly, pretty? Those… freckles. Adorable. I hate adorable. He’s just so… sh*t. He’s too nice, too caring, too selfless, too helpful… too easy to like. F*ck him.
Okay, so now that Google has FINALLY loaded…
Bakugou likes to think his research helped him more than it did. He learned that if he acts like nothing bothers him, people will think nothing bothers him. I just have to be half ‘n’ half until these gross feelings go away.
“Bakubro, whatever it is you’re trying, you need to stop,” Hanta softly ordered one day after class, crouching in front of Bakugou’s desk.
“Yeah… you’ve been acting like Todoroki. If something happened, you HAVE to tell us. We’re your friends,” Eijirou added.
“The longer you don’t tell us what’s up, the more we’ll pry. And we’ll get even more worried until we don’t stop bugging you. Bakubro, whatever’s up, we’re going to find out. You might as well tell us,” Mina chimed in. Katsuki growled. He knew it was true. They’d keep prying.
“What do you mean, ‘acting like Todoroki’? I’m me, still me,” he calmly objected. Denki groaned and slapped him across the back of his head. THAT was hard for Katsuki to not fight back to.
“See? You’re too calm. The real Bakugou would’ve blown my head off by now. He would’ve screamed ‘DIE!’ at Ashido after she said what she said. He would’ve threatened to hang Sero by his own tape. The whole classroom wouldn’t be here anymore. WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND?!” The electric student yelled, waving his arms around.
Katsuki let a single explosion pierce the silence.
“There. Happy now?”
And then he left. I guess I have a thing for dramatic exits.
Four: how to distance yourself from your classmate
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Katsuki had given up on trying to fix his ‘broken feelings’. He resorted to just staying as far away from Deku as possible, as the urge to kiss him was becoming stronger.
Good thing he isn’t a pro hero yet, I’d probably have a pillow of him or something by now. Ew, those cliche... stupid little... gross… rom-com girl movie things. Gross.
“Bakugou. Late for class,” Aizawa pointed out in the middle of his lecture.
“Whoops,” Katsuki sarcastically mumbled, dropping into his desk.
“We’ve already assigned partners. Everyone, go find your group and start working on your project. Remember, part of being a hero is making the right decisions, so your maze needs to have difficult choices with drastic differences.”
Katsuki looked around, waiting for Eijirou, Hanta, Denki, Mina, or someone to come over. Instead, he looked up from his desk and was bet with 2 giant emerald eyes.
“Okay Kacchan, so our assignment is to make a digital maze and-”
“Why the h*ll am I partners with you?!” Katsuki thundered. Deku chuckled nervously and rubbed the back of his neck. Ugh, it’s too cute. He needs to stop!
“Well, um Kacchan, Aizawa put everyone into their groups, he said we need to work on teamwo-”
“F*ck off. I’ll do it all myself.”
“We get one grade for both of us. If I don’t do any work we’ll both end up with a C, because of your A.”
Katsuki grimaced and held onto his desk for dear life. I’m f*cked. Something’s going to go wrong. Deku continued explaining the assignment.
“So, we have to make a digital maze, but it’s like a roleplay video game where the decisions you make will affect your journey! Like, one question could be ‘do you save the townspeople or attack the villain?’ or something! This is really fun and exciting!”
He seemed really happy about the assignment, and although he’d never admit it, it warmed Katsuki’s heart. I… okay, find a way to be as far away as possible.
“Okay, well, I… I don’t feel great, so I’m going to stay in my room after school. How about we work on this via… like, Facetime or something?” Deku seemed worried but being the nice guy he is, wanted to make sure Katsuki did what was best for him.
“That’s fine, you can Facetime me after school, I was planning on working on schoolwork so I didn’t make any plans.” So f*cking… smart.
“Good.”
Now I just have to make it through the rest of class without vomiting, blushing, or getting shy or flustered. Well, this is going to be rough.
Let’s start with not staring.
Five: how to be yourself but also hide everything you don’t want people to know about you because your friends are nosy pieces of sh*t
Your search - ‘how to be yourself but also hide everything you don’t want people to know about you because your friends are nosy pieces of sh*t’ - did not match any documents.
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Katsuki had deemed himself hopeless. No matter what, someone was going to figure him out. Whether that was his parents, friends, or ‘f*cking Deku’ himself.
Forcing himself to be straight didn’t work because feelings are inevitable. Getting rid of feelings didn’t work because love is inevitable. Hiding his feelings didn’t work because feelings are inevitable. Avoiding the source of his feelings didn’t work because feelings are inevitable.
F*cking… stupid… inevitable… f*cking… feelings… The ‘Bakusquad’ picked up on his weird behavior. His mom even asked him if he had a girlfriend back on Valentine's Day, and when he said no, she shrugged, and said, “I thought maybe you would, the girls worshipped you in elementary and middle school.”
But Deku didn’t notice anything. He appeared to be worried about Katsuki’s health, but he didn’t question the fact that Katsuki was only sick around him. He hadn’t picked up on the fact that Katsuki was avoiding him. Maybe that’s because he’d avoided Deku all of their childhood. Maybe he didn’t see a difference.
The door to Katsuki’s dorm opened and light poured through the gap. A familiar spiky silhouette appeared and shut the door behind him.
“There’s this thing called knocking, and people who don’t do it get f*cking destroyed,” Katsuki yelled. Eijirou shrugged and grinned toothily. He invited himself to sit on Katsuki’s bed and wrap an arm around the blonde’s shoulders.
“So… you wanna Detroit Smash Midoriya?” So many things happened in that second. Explosions went off, arms hardened, faces paled… Katsuki gasped and threw Eijirou off his bed, with a few small explosions. His face paled, all but his bright red cheeks.
“Why would you f*cking dare accuse me of something that f*cking disgusting and stupid?” Katsuki screeched after composing himself. He towered over Eijirou, who was smirking, curled up on Katsuki’s floor.
“Because it’s true?”
“No, it was a f*cking uneducated guess. In fact, you’re so wrong, I might just have to shoot you straight into the sun with one of my explosions, how does that sound?”
“Pretty f*cking hot.” Katsuki growled.
“Well, thanks for the talk, I’m going to go tell Ashido the news.” Eijirou walked to the door and left, but then peeked his head in.
“She’ll help you find the best positions.” He left and his sh*t-eating grin was burned into Katsuki’s memory. He’s got no f*cking clue what he’s talking about. If he does, he won’t for long, because I’m going to shove my fist down his throat and pull his stomach out through his mouth if he says a f*cking word.
One: how to confess to your crush
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Katsuki officially gave up. It was eating away at him. It was like the buried affection had overstuffed his heart and had to be stored somewhere else, so it made its home in his stomach. He didn’t eat as much.
He avoided Eijirou at all costs, but he and Mina hadn’t said anything, so he felt like he didn’t have to do anything yet. He still couldn’t help but notice the encouraging smiles Eijirou would give him whenever Deku was near.
Almost like that f*cker wants me to say something. But alas, I can’t help but feel butterflies in my stomach, or whatever they're called. I call it nausea, weakness.
Katsuki decided to go for something simple: he got Deku a tiny bouquet of yellow roses. But even though yellow roses are a symbol of friendship, he knew Deku isn’t particularly a genius when it comes to flowers or symbolism of things. He figured Deku would like them anyway. When it comes to Deku, it’s the thought that counts, right? Katsuki took a deep breath and entered the classroom. Out of the few people already there, everyone was chatting in groups except for Deku, who was sitting at his desk, reading a rather large book. The blonde walked right up and stood directly in front of the desk. Deku didn’t seem to notice.
“Hey, nerd.” Deku quickly shut his book and looked up.
“K-Kacchan?” Katsuki took a deep breath, gripping the bouquet behind his back.
“Deku… I don’t… hate you.” Deku cocked his head to the side. This is hard . Katsuki closed his eyes and focused, looking for the right words. “Um… I’m not quite sure what I’m trying to say, but… I get butterflies in my stomach when I… uh, feel your presence? I guess? So I’m still not quite sure what this feeling is, but…” Katsuki opened his eyes and noticed the bright pink blush intermingled with his freckles. Adorable.
Katsuki inhaled and held his breath as he timidly pulled the bouquet out from behind him to hand to Deku. “My research said this was a good way to get a boyfriend.” Deku’s jaw hung open as he took the flowers.
“I… K-Kacchan! I have no words! This is so…” He stood.
“Will you be my boyfriend or not?” Katsuki snarled, slamming his hands on Deku’s desk.
“I- Yes! Kacchan, yes, I will!” Katsuki left a gentle kiss on the tip of Deku’s nose before turning to walk to his spot.
“Good.”