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The enemy have a sex change ray. Of course they do.
Super villains always have the worst timing. They never operate within office hours. It's never nine to five with them, or on Sundays when nothing much is going on, or on a slow afternoon when the team just happens to be in one place and geared up. Oh, no. That would be too easy. It's almost always like this: extremely inconvenient.
Tony had been on his way out the door to the Tony Awards party, for heaven's sake. It would have been so much fun; he had planned to find some B-list actress stupid enough to believe him when he said the awards were actually his idea, hence the name, and then bring her home. Just for laughs and sex, obviously. Not like he had any vested interest in the awards themselves. But still, Tony had plans.
And then Director Fury called them all to let them know that someone was shooting up Central Park with an as of yet unidentified ray gun. It could be anything. So Avengers, assemble. You've got shit to do.
Tony turned on his heel and went back into his lab, got the armour on, and flew to rendezvous with the others in the park, ranting at Jarvis all the way there.
“I mean, it's not like they even know what the gun is,” he says, turning a corner building. “And it's Central Park. How many people can possibly be in there at this time of night?”
“Director Fury expressed grave concern, sir,” Jarvis says smoothly.
“His life is grave concern,” Tony bitches. “It's what he's paid for, to be gravely concerned. Okay, we're here. Where are the bad guys?”
“The north-east corner, sir,” Jarvis offers helpfully.
“Iron Man, where are you?” Steve demands over the comm link.
“Present and accounted for, Cap,” Tony sighs. “Update?”
“We're half a block away,” Steve informs him, and from the slight hitches in his breath, Tony can tell he is running. “Can you get an overview of the situation before we arrive?”
“I'll just go blast 'em a few repulsor shots,” Tony says, lifting off and heading for the north-east corner.
“No!” Steve yells, and Tony ignores him. “Iron Man, do not go in alone, I repeat, do not – damn it, Tony, wait for backup!”
“Yeah, yeah, I'll catch you there,” Tony says, unconcerned, and steers the suit a little higher to get a better look of things.
Which is when the bad guys' ray hits him square in the chest. The noise of the waves clashing with the metal of his suit are disturbing, like the rushing you hear inside a conch but magnified thousandfold. Tony yells in surprise and drops down to the cover of the trees again.
“Tony?” Steve demands, his voice urgent in Tony's ear. “Tony, what happened?”
“I got hit,” Tony says, and his voice doesn't sound right, there must be something wrong with his microphone or his speaker. He takes a quick second to feel his body while hovering. “Not hurt. The ray isn't immediately dangerous.”
“Avengers, be advised the enemy have a ray with so far unknown effects,” Steve advises them over the comm link.
“We heard him, too, Cap,” Clint says drily. “Stark, what the hell are you doing to yourself?”
Tony wants to explain that, hey, he didn't do anything, it was the super villains. But just then, someone yells and someone shoots, and the bad guys start firing at random, and yeah, another Avengers party in the making. They all throw themselves into the fight, Bruce hulks out, Tony fires at their ray gun (which is shaped like a big, old-fashioned cannon, seriously, what are these people thinking), and Steve rounds everyone up at the end and ties them up for the authorities.
A normal day at the office, in other words.
So it's not until they get back to the Club House (Clint is to blame for that charming nickname for the Stark Mansion) that Tony notices something is, indeed, wrong. He lands on the small roof pad, the suit is removed, and Tony heads down to meet the others in the living room. He gets as far as the door, reaching out to scan his prints for entry, before noticing it.
His hand doesn't look like his hand.
“Sir,” Jarvis interrupts, “your vital statistics are notably altered since you left earlier this evening. Your body temperature is a degree lower and your heart rate is slightly elevated. Are you feeling quite alright, sir?”
“No,” Tony says, and his voice doesn't sound like his voice. “Jarvis, tell me what's wrong with me. Aside from the obvious, normal stuff.”
“Sir, based on mathematical calculations of your facial features and physical measurements -”
“I never thought I'd say this, but mathematical blah blah, Jarvis, I'm freaking out here!” Tony demands.
“You appear to be female, sir.”
Tony stops. Stares into the air. Opens the door and goes inside. “Jarvis, remind me to uninstall and reinstall you. You've lost it.”
“Yes, madam.”
“Maybe even delete all your files and create a new AI,” Tony mutters, heading down the stairs to meet the others.
Steve, Bruce, Clint and Natasha are all there when he gets down. The loud singing in some dead language emanating from the adjoining kitchen tells him where Thor is. Tony strolls up to his liquor cabinet and greets them all with a wave.
“Celebratory toast, anyone?”
The next thing he knows, Tony finds himself on the ground, the air slammed out of his lungs, Natasha sitting astride his legs with one hand holding his throat in a death grip and the other holding his wrists pinned above his head.
“Wow, surprise lethal sexy times,” he says. “Not that I'm not loving this, but next time, maybe warn me so I don't wet myself?”
Natasha looks down at him, then frowns slightly. “Stark?”
“Uh, yeah?” Tony asks, confused.
“What about Stark?” Steve asks, even more confused. He looks down at Tony and then at Natasha. “Who's this?”
Tony stares up at him. “Uh, did you get hit over the head, Steve? It's Natasha. You know her. The sexy Russian who calls people by their last name?”
Steve's eyes bulge halfway out of his head. “Tony?”
“Yeah, I'm right here!” Tony snaps, getting annoyed now. “What is up with everyone?”
“You're... you're,” Steve begins, gaping. “Tony! You're a girl!”
Tony rolls his eyes. “You and Jarvis. You both need some serious upgrade work.”
Natasha gets off him, and Tony wishes she hadn't, but then she reaches out a hand to help him up. This is weird, and kind of creepy. Natasha only ever gives Clint a hand up, and that's only when she's knocked him flat on his ass first. Tony takes her hand and lets himself be pulled to his feet. Natasha is deceptively strong for such a finely shaped woman.
“Jarvis, can you get us a mirror right quick?” Bruce asks, his voice strangely quiet.
Jarvis confirms and converts one of the windows into a reflective surface with a thin layer of film pulled down. Tony turns a raised eyebrow at Bruce, but the scientist only gestures towards the window. Tony turns and looks at himself.
He's a girl.
He yells in shock, stumbling a few steps backwards. His manly yell comes out as a much too high-pitched scream, because damn, he's a woman! Boobs, wide hips, no beard, the whole shebang. He's a woman.
“Wow, Stark, you look a lot better as a woman,” Clint notices, leaning back against the couch with perfect calm. “This is going to make things so much easier on my eyes. Especially mornings.”
“The ray,” Bruce breathes, coming over to stare blatantly at Tony. “The ray gun they used at the park today. Did it hit you?”
“Yeah, square in the suit,” Tony says, unable to stop staring at his reflection. His hair is short and ruffled, his chin is delicate, his lips are pretty. His boobs are amazing. “Wow, I really do look amazing as a woman.”
“The enemy had a sex change ray?” Natasha asks drily, arching an eyebrow to voice her shock, outrage and/or disbelief. It's all pretty much one face with her.
“How else can you account for the fact that Tony is a girl?” Steve says with a helpless shrug of his shoulders. “I mean... He was a man earlier today, we all saw him at the meeting. But this is clearly Tony.”
“Yes, I'm Tony, and yes, I am normally a man,” Tony confirms. “So, sex change ray. You think they patented it? They could make a fortune with that thing on the transvestite market.”
“Tony!” Steve gasps. “You can't joke about this. We have to do something!”
“Maybe it's temporary?” Clint suggests. “Hey, Stark, can I see your boobs?”
“Get in line, I'm seeing them first,” Tony says, absently palming his new assets. Wow, they're so soft. Squishy. Malleable. Pepper, may she be his ex in peace, has excellent breasts but Tony's are so much bigger.
“This is crazy,” Steve decides loudly. “I am going down to the precinct, to see if the people we caught today can explain this.”
“I'll come with you,” Bruce says, getting to his feet quickly. “If they have research to back this up...”
“You're not going without me!” Tony declares, turning to face them, hands still on his awesome boobs. “It's my ass on the line – literally!”
“You've been compromised,” Natasha says coolly, sitting down in the couch without taking her eyes off Tony. “If you go down there, you'll let them know their weapon worked and hit one of us. Containing that knowledge could give us a tactical advantage later. You should stay here.”
Tony groans and shifts impatiently. “But this is so absurd! I can't stay here and just be a girl while you interrogate the people who made me a girl!”
But the others won't listen, and so Tony finds himself alone in his living room with Clint, Natasha and Thor, who just needed a quick explanation before nodding sagely and settling down on the couch.
“My brother Loki once became a mare and gave birth to a foal,” Thor says with a careless wave of his hand. “And I once disguised myself as a bride to regain Mjolnir from the jotun Trym. It is not such a hardship.”
Tony stares at him. Seriously, Thor in a gown? He could not possibly have fooled anyone. The Loki part, now, that was fare more easily believed.
“Yeah, but I'm not just dressed up,” Tony says, then lifts his shirt to look down at his boobs. His perky, pretty boobs. With an arc reactor glowing between them. “I've actually got real boobs, look!”
Thor looks, and a smile breaks out across that godly face. “They are indeed pleasing to the eye.”
Clint sporfles his coffee. “Stark, dude, you can't just flash those at a guy!”
“Hey, I'm just setting a good example,” Tony says innocently, poking a little at his boob with his finger. It jiggles. Cool. “I hope if I do this enough, Natasha will start doing the same.”
“Yeah, that's not gonna happen,” Natasha says, but she is staring at his boobs. “Really, Stark, put your shirt back down, or I'm going to forget that I kind of like guys these days.”
Tony gapes at her. “Seriously? You're into girls? Oh, man, that is so hot!”
“I'm into nothing,” Natasha says scathingly. “But when I do indulge, women are usually superior in every respect.”
Clint just shrugs at Tony's open-mouthed stare. “Hey, she told me Pepper is better at going down on her than I am. And that was, according to Pepper, the first time she had ever done that. I've known Nat for too long to be insulted.”
“So, Natasha,” Tony says, his mouth going a little dry. “You sure you don't want me to help you indulge? I mean, with my experience and a woman's body, it's bound to be awesome, right?”
Natasha snorts and rolls her eyes. “You couldn't make me wet with a hose, Stark, despite your lovely new assets.”
And now it's a challenge.
So Tony, in his woman's body, with wide hips and full breasts and a strange feeling of heat clenching between his legs, sidles over to the sofa and gets to his knees on the floor in front of Natasha. He looks up at her, puts his hands on her thighs very slowly – very, very slowly, so she won't get mad and suddenly kill him – and slides them upwards. The material of her loose sweats bunch under his palms.
“Can I try?”
Natasha's eyes go a little wide, her lips open just a fraction. “Here?”
“Don't care,” Tony says, his voice a little deeper and huskier, but still nowhere near his normal register. He grins up at her. “I have a huge bed. But I'm thinking you like this.”
The way her pupils dilate tells him everything he needs to know. He pushes her thighs apart, very gently and slowly, and fits himself between her legs. Leaning in, Tony puts his mouth – his much smaller, firmer mouth – on her inner thigh, the material of her sweat pants becoming damp with his breath. Natasha spreads her legs a little wider and doesn't kill him.
“Nat?” Clint asks, softly, and his voice is rough.
Natasha doesn't answer, and her eyes stay locked with Tony's as he mouths his way up her thigh, finally encountering the heat of her radiating through the pants. Tony nuzzles into it, drawing in a deep breath as if he could smell her through the material.
He actually can, for a second, and it hits him like a freight train. He hasn't wanted anyone like this since Pepper.
Tony slips his hands into the waistband of the sweat pants as he climbs onto the couch. Kneeling on the cushions next to her right leg, he slides his hand (so much smaller, damn it, and delicate, how is he supposed to do this?) down beneath the elastic. He leans in to mouth along her cloth-covered breast as he feels the cotton of her panties.
“Stark,” she says, and her voice is almost a little breathy. “You're still not doing it for me.”
Tony cups her sex through her panties, nipping gently at her shoulder as he does so. “Give me a second.”
He uses his left hand to dip into her bra and thumb her nipple slowly. Her breathing quickens a little and she spreads her legs further. Her sleeveless top has ridden up a little in the back and Tony can see a sliver of perfect porcelain skin exposed there. His own, even in his female form, is still a little ruddy and tanned. The contrast looks so good he wants to taste it.
When his hand slides inside her underwear, Natasha actually voices a little gasp. Tony finds her wet, her heat clinging to his fingers as he draws them through her folds. His own body is giving him trouble; the arousal response is not at all what he's used to, but he grits his teeth and focuses on Natasha. Her eyes flutter closed when he finds her clit. Rubbing it in slow circles, Tony watches her closely for cues.
“Want to tell me what you like?” Tony asks, softly and femininely. Because, duh, his voice is also female. It sounds like something out of a porn hotline, and Tony almost turns himself on even more.
“Harder,” she breathes, bucking her hips a little against his hand. “And higher, just a – there, there!”
Tony focuses all his considerable skills of concentration on making her shudder in his arms. Her breathing is coming faster now, her eyelids opening and closing like butterfly wings. She pulls her feet up on the couch and Tony has to move his arm to make room for her bent leg, but her shapely hips are slowly grinding against his hand and she has to be getting close.
“Wow, Natasha, I never thought you could look better than you do in your uniform, but apparently you can,” Tony breathes, then leans in to breathe in her scent along her throat. “You want more? Anything else? Just tell me, I'll give you anything.”
Natasha gasps and Tony can feel her twitching under his fingers. She's getting close. He shifts his hand so that his thumb is on her clit, rubbing harder and higher like she wanted, and his next two fingers are thrusting shallowly in and out of her. She moans so softly he might not have heard it if he wasn't so close.
“I'll go down on you if you want,” Tony offers, his wrist beginning to strain but not willing to slow down until he sees her come. “Put my mouth where my hand is. You want that?”
And Natasha comes, beautifully, her back arching and her tight walls clamping down on Tony's fingers in spasms of pleasure. She gasps loudly and openly, her head thrown back and her legs twitching helplessly. Tony works her for what seems like endless moments until, finally, she starts to come down, and moans again as she pushes his hand away.
“See, Stark, that would never have happened if you weren't female,” Natasha says, her voice a little rough. She draws a deep breath and looks up at him through her lashes. “How do you feel?”
Tony allows himself to register all the sensations his body has been throwing at him since he reached the couch. His belly feels tight, as if it's clenching without his input. He knows he's wet, can feel it between his thighs. His breasts are aching dully, as if he needs something he can't even put into words.
“I'm... I'm so wet right now,” Tony says slowly, and a huge grin breaks out across his face. “Wow, that's awesome, I always wanted to get to use that phrase!”
Twin groans from either side of them alert Tony to the fact that, oh, hey, they're not actually alone. He looks back over his shoulder and sees Clint, seated at the far end of the couch (and Tony's couch is a huge, monstrous thing of perfect comfort) with one hand in his pants and the other in his mouth, biting the knuckles. It is obvious how he is feeling at the moment.
At the other side of Natasha, in the armchair angled slightly towards the coffee table, Thor has disposed of pants all together (they're shoved down around his ankles, and Tony would protest that nobody should be naked in his chair except him, but it's Thor, damn it). He's fisting his cock, stroking it quickly, and those blue eyes are flashing.
“Oh, okay, orgy time,” Tony says breathlessly, and he can feel a strange, pinching sensation in his chest region. Oh, right, sensitive nipples, okay. He looks at Natasha, finds her watching Thor with the same hungry look Tony can imagine is all over his own face right now, and grins.
“Good girls share, right?”
Natasha arches an eyebrow at him. “Fine, have Thor first. I can wait.”
“What am I, wallpaper?” Clint grunts, and Tony turns back again to see him pulling his hand slowly out of his pants. “Nat, are you... Is this gonna happen?”
“Thor, would you like to fuck me?” Tony asks, ignoring the others for now.
“I would like nothing better,” Thor growls, releasing his dick.
Tony launches himself off the sofa, then crawls eagerly into Thor's lap. “Fantastic. How do we do this? I've never been a woman being had sex with before.”
“Remove your garments, and I will show you how an Asgardian prince pleases a woman,” Thor says with a wicked glint in his eyes.
Tony gets naked so fast. So fast.
Thor gets to his feet, throwing off the rest of his clothes as he does so, and then resettles in the chair. “Come, friend Tony, let us make the beast with two backs like the best of warriors.”
Tony climbs back into the thunder god's lap and looks expectantly at Thor. “Well?”
Thor pulls him down for a kiss first, and Tony feels like this should be weird, with his own skin so smooth and soft and Thor's all bearded and prickly, but it's great. Even the beard burn on his new girl cheeks is great. And when Thor's huge, huge hands find his breasts and start to sort of knead them, Tony moans.
Damn, those babies are sensitive.
“Your new body pleases me,” Thor says, grinning against Tony's mouth. “Your form has always been appealing, but the novelty of this is tempting beyond reason.”
“Are you saying that you liked me even before I got boobs?” Tony pants, shaking all over from the restraint he's showing by not just riding Thor like a prize rodeo bull. He did that once or twice in his youth, and this is clearly a situation where Tony's old cock-riding skills ought to be brought out and dusted off. “This could happen again while we're both guys?”
“I would gladly take my pleasure with you in any form,” Thor confirms, and slides one hand across Tony's well-rounded thigh to slip wide fingers over the soft, wet flesh between those shapely legs.
Tony screams.
“Wow, Stark, you're like a fourteen-year old with her first boyfriend,” Clint says from behind Tony.
“Oh holy fucking Thor,” Tony gasps, his body shaking like a tree in high wind as Thor's digits caress his new lady parts. He never knew anything could feel this intense; having his dick sucked doesn't even compare. Every time Thor's finger rubs over his clit, his hips buck of their own volition and Tony can't breathe for a second.
“Your reactions are gratifying,” Thor murmurs, grinning at Tony before he kisses him briefly again. “Tell me, is it different? Does a woman take her pleasure like a man or unlike him?”
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Tony moans. He presses his forehead against Thor's and breathes heavily into the air between them; one of Thor's fingers is rubbing hard, intense circles on his clit and he can't think or speak properly while that is going on.
“Like... like nothing... I ever...” Tony breathes, but gives up and whimpers into Thor's neck as his body lapses into shudders again.
“I will take you now,” Thor growls, and his hands clamp onto Tony's hips, lifting and guiding him. “I will make you scream my name.”
And, wow, there is an absolutely monstrously huge dick between his thighs, Tony notes; that thing is about to be inside his awesome new body. Tony laughs in anticipation and shifts obligingly under Thor's directions until he's right over it, ready to just -
“Ow! Ow, what the fuck, what are you doing?”
Thor looks up, brow creased in confusion. He stops, the tip of his dick just nudging Tony. “I am making the beast with two backs. Are you hurting?”
Tony tries to press down, but the same searing pain that stopped him a moment ago is suddenly there again. It feels like something is about to tear, and that something is his whole vagina.
“Well, hell. Natasha, you're a full-time girl. Why does this hurt?” Tony demands.
“Maybe you're too dry,” she says, almost smiling smugly on the couch.
Thor's fingers are back and Tony gasps. “Definitely not the problem.”
“I am perhaps too large,” Thor says apologetically. “This has happened before.”
“But I've been having sex for nearly thirty years, and once, this guy – no, that can't be it,” Tony insists.
“You're still a virgin,” Bruce says.
Tony turns to find Bruce and Steve standing in the doorway, a stack of folders in Bruce's arms and three pizza boxes in Steve's. Captain America is gaping, beet red and unable to stop staring at the naked people, while Bruce's eyes have gone dark and hungry, but otherwise the scientist is perfectly composed.
“I mean, your new female body is. The first time can hurt.”
Tony snaps his fingers. “Dude, why didn't I think of that? Okay, so it's just the once and then I'm good to go, right? It's not like it'll hurt every time?”
“There's no guarantee,” Bruce says, and puts the folders down on the nearest table. “But I'm not sure an orgy in the living room is the right way to start.”
Tony snorts and waves a hand. “I was always a little ahead of the pack. But, uh, Thor, big guy – in all senses of the word – yeah, sorry. I don't think you should go first. Maybe second. But you're about to tear me in two with that thing.”
Thor looks disappointed, but Tony is never out of ideas. “But I want to suck your dick, though. Can I?”
Thor's growl is loud and affirmative, so Tony slides out of his lap – still buck naked – and goes to his knees in front of the chair so his eye level is equal to Thor's one-eyed snake.
“Bruce, get your ass in here and get naked,” Tony demands. “We're about to have an orgy, and I'd hate for you to miss it. Steve, too, if he thinks he can stand the indecency.”
“Tony!” Steve gasps, finally able to speak. “You can't... We can't... You don't know what your new body is going to do! It could change back! We need to sort this out first!”
“Actually, I was thinking, orgy first, sorting later,” Tony counters, looking up to find Steve in the exact same spot, still blushing and still holding pizza boxes. “Because I already know what my girl body does. It feels amazing.”
And he swallows as much of Thor's cock as he can fit inside his new, much smaller mouth.
Being otherwise occupied, Tony doesn't see the flurry of activity going on behind him. He can hear the sounds of fabric dragging across skin, of Natasha and Bruce murmuring, of things being placed on surfaces (he guesses the pizza boxes and folders) and of furniture creaking. But he can't see a thing, because Thor's godly thighs are blocking his vision, and Thor's cock is leaking copiously into his mouth, and Tony just wants to suck him dry.
“Don't finish him,” Natasha says, and soft heat at his back tells Tony she's right behind him. “I want a go first. I think I can take it.”
“Mmph,” Tony concedes, and pulls slowly off. He looks up at Thor, whose eyes are dark blue and glittering hungrily, and draws a deep breath. “Yeah, I think this will still be awesome.”
“I've got some ideas for later,” Natasha whispers into Tony's ear. “But first I want to see you get fucked.”
Which is when none of the others seem able to hold it anymore. It might be the hot promise of girl-on-girl action, or the sight of two naked women kneeling in front of Thor, or the fact that Clint loudly declares “I found lube!” Whatever it is, Tony finds himself picked up and carried across the room, and wow, that's a novel sensation.
“Dude,” he says dazedly, and looks up to find Steve standing over him in front of the couch.
“I want you so bad, Tony,” Steve says, biting his lip and looking so damn innocent. Except for his amazing pecs, which are doing their usual job of defying gravity and looking awesome. Even through the shirt. “I just... I wanted us to do this differently.”
Tony stares at him. No. No, that can't really be what Steve means. He's just... confused. By Tony's perky, really visible new boobs.
“But, if we're doing this now, I wanted to ask... if maybe... I can be the first. Please?” Steve stutters, and the words are barely out in a rush before he colours like a brick wall and stares resolutely at the floor. “I mean...”
“Aaw, Steve,” Tony grins, placing his hands cockily on his hips. “I didn't know you liked me! I mean, more than everybody else, because come on, everybody likes me, but hey! You learn something new every day, I guess.”
Steve dares a look at Tony. “I like... you. Not this new you. I mean, gosh, you're beautiful, I think you're the second most beautiful woman I've ever seen -”
“Hey!” Tony snaps, crossing his arms across his chest. Which turns into under his boobs, because they're kind of right across his chest.
Steve's eyes are drawn there magnetically. “I mean... I mean, you're gorgeous like this, but I like you as yourself. If, if you still want to, when we turn you back, I want to take you out. And, uh, maybe more. If you want to.”
Tony laughs. “If I want to? Come on, Steve, my body may be female but my libido is all my own. I want to, alright. And sure, you can be the first. Go ahead, soldier, deflower me.”
“Great!” Steve blurts out, a grin breaking across his face. Then he cocks his head to the side, looking confused again. “Uh... How do we do this?”
“I'm gonna lie down on the couch here,” Tony says, and does so. Moisture between his legs makes the leather feel a little sticky underneath his ass, but hey, new experiences. Tony grins up at Steve. “You pull your pants down, get over me and impale me. Oh, man, I've always wanted to say that!”
“You're turning into a porn movie,” Clint says, and Tony looks up to find him half sitting on the couch's back. “Seriously. I never heard a girl talk like that. Unless someone paid her.”
“I'm not a girl,” Tony grins, moving his hands up to knead his own breasts again. Sooo malleable. “So I can talk however I want.”
“Uh, guys, I'm... I'm not really sure I can do this with you watching,” Steve stammers. Tony follows his gaze and finds Natasha, Bruce, Clint and Thor all gathered around the couch.
“You're going to take Tony Stark's virginity,” Clint says drily. “The world has been lamenting the fact that nobody knows when that happened; it's lost in the mists of time. Now we'll know.”
Steve's blush deepens to an almost indecent shade. “But... but...”
Natasha slides over the arm of the couch, and wow, she's so naked. Tony heartily approves. She puts her arms around Steve's neck and draws him in to whisper in his ear, just loud enough for the others to hear: “He wants you to, Steve; he needs you to. Come on, let me show you.”
Tony knows the others are all watching, but he was always an exhibitionist, he doesn't mind. Steve's dick is bulging under his jeans, but it doesn't look anywhere near as threatening as Thor's, so Tony doesn't flinch at all when Steve – guided by Natasha – lies down between his spread thighs. He's still got all his clothes on, and man, that is so hot.
“Open your pants and push them down,” Natasha suggests, her voice velvety soft and commanding. She helps Steve as he does, their fingers dancing slowly over fabric. Steve's knuckles brush Tony's inner thigh, and Tony moans.
“Tony, did you... already...?” Steve asks, voice strained.
Tony blinks up at him. Did he what? Oh, right, come, probably. “Uh, no. Figured I'd wait until I got fucked.”
Natasha laughs, then. Actually laughs. “What, are you afraid of spending them too quickly? You know you can probably come several times in a night, right?”
“You know, I actually forgot,” Tony says, slapping a hand to his own forehead. “How can I be so smart and so stupid at the same time, right? My sexiness usually makes up for it. So, orgasms. Feel free to help a guy – well, a girl – out at any time. But Steve? I want fucking, and I want it now.”
“No,” Steve says, and he actually looks a little relieved. “No, I want to do this for you.” And he starts backing down a little.
Natasha, that wonderful sex coordinator, helps them all out. “Tony, move up a little, will you? Spread your legs wider. Can you hook your knee over the backrest? That usually works for me.”
“I noticed,” Tony says hoarsely. He scoots backwards until he's leaning against the armrest. A big, calloused hand grabs his right knee, pulling it upwards. Looking up along that arm, Tony meets Bruce's warm gaze.
“I want seconds,” Bruce says in a deep voice.
Tony's body shudders, telling him in no uncertain terms that Bruce will get his way. But just at that moment, Steve lowers his head, eyes turned up to Tony's, and puts his mouth on him. Her. Whatever.
“Oooh,” Tony exhales. “Oh, yeah, I love that.”
“Don't listen to him, he's just trying to stroke your ego,” Natasha says, and fuck that bitch, who does she think she is? “You'll know when he actually likes it. Try sucking on his clit. Hard.”
Tony is about to protest that he does like it, because he does, it's nice, when Steve follows orders, apparently. Because it suddenly feels as if Tony's whole body is being pulled tight into a tiny, tiny needlepoint of intense pleasure.
“Fuck!”
“See, now he likes it,” Natasha says, and even though Tony's head is thrown back in pleasure so he can only see upside-down Thor, he knows she's smiling.
“Again, again, fuck!” Tony demands, fisting one hand in Steve's perfect hair. He tugs on it, and Steve sucks in a breath – that rushes over Tony's new lady parts. Oh, God. Holy fucking Thor.
And Steve sucks, and licks, and bites gently – with Natasha's constant guiding murmurs filling the air. Tony thinks he's about to go stir crazy. Just like before, the pleasure is a completely different thing to what he's used to; it's so much more intense. Everything seems to be centred on that one point that Steve keeps finding, but then someone strokes lightly across his breast and Tony bucks.
“Don't neglect the other parts of the body,” Natasha advices, kneeling on the floor next to Tony's new, bouncy chest. “It's different with girls. Almost every... single... inch of our bodies...”
And here she leans in and sucks Tony's nipple into her mouth, making Tony yell in pleasure.
“... is an erogenous zone when treated right.”
So then suddenly Thor is kissing him upside down, and Bruce's hand is busy at Tony's other breast, and Clint leans down to lick lasciviously around the tender skin of Tony's inner ankle. Tony can't take it; the sensations are building up like a red hot, constant throb in the small of his back. He's arching, grinding his hips against Steve's face, and he knows, instinctively, that he just needs...
“Oh God, Steve!”
With that flick of Steve's tongue, Tony's whole body convulses as he comes, his abdomen drawing tight, his face crumpling into a disbelieving grimace. Fuck, fuck, fuck, it's so good...
“Put your fingers in him now,” Natasha orders, looking up at Tony's face with dark eyes. “Feel how his body is loving this.”
Steve does, and Tony whimpers a little as two of those broad digits invade his sensitive new body, but he can feel it as well – he's contracting around them, almost rhythmically, as the aftershocks of his orgasm linger in his body.
“That,” Tony slurs, unable to quite open his mouth wide enough for proper words, “was amazing.”
Steve is grinning up at him, but there is something un-Steve-like about the grin. The pinnacle of human perfection is moving up along the couch, between Tony's spread legs, looking at the skin underneath him with wide, hungry eyes.
“Can I, Tony? Please?”
“You don't have to beg,” Tony grins wiggling a little to get more comfortable under Steve. “But I kinda like it when you do, you know? Okay, deflowerment time. Hit it.”
Natasha scoffs delicately. “Judging from your reaction to Thor earlier, you're not necessarily in for a treat. If I were you, I'd ask him to go slow.”
“No, I'm sure it's like a bandaid, just rip it and it'll be fine,” Tony argues. Then he notices Steve is looking a little worried, and back-pedals. “No, hey, I just mean it'll hurt a little at first, but no biggie, just get it over with and we can get on with the orgy business, right?”
Steve is still not moving. Tony figures he should use his new girl skills.
“Steve, I need you inside me,” Tony purrs, hands on Steve's shoulders pulling him down. “Now. Please, Steve, I need you to fuck me.”
A chorus of groans confirms to Tony that this is, indeed, what makes women so sexy. The dirty talk helps, of course, but what it all boils down to is this: guys just can't resist a girl wanting to be filled. It's probably very biological.
“Tony,” Steve says, almost tenderly, and he's shifting, his hips stuttering a little against Tony's, and then there's something hard and hot pressing against –
“Oh fuck,” Tony gasps, because yeah, that hurts like a motherfucker. But a second later, Steve is inside him, fully inside him, and Tony can feel every inch. It feels, strangely, a lot more invasive than the few times he's been fucked by a guy. Uh, before. Whatever.
But it's Steve. Who's looking at him like he's pure magic. Whose eyes are dark blue with the need for permission. Who is shuddering slightly above Tony, not even caring any more that three other guys and a sexy, lethal Russian are all staring at them. Tony grins up at him and lets his nails dig into Steve's still clad shoulders.
“Saddle up, cowboy.”
Steve almost laughs, but pulls himself together and begins fucking into Tony, pushing deep, letting Tony feel it all in intense detail. Tony moans and thrashes underneath him. Holy Christ, this is good. Too good. Too much.
“Yeah, yeah, like that,” Tony encourages, clawing greedily at the massively muscled body above his own. He loves this; he loves being smaller, being covered and filled by a body so much bigger than his own, he loves the rough scrape of boring, beige trousers against the insides of his own thighs. He loves it just as much as he loves being on top of a girl, feeling her softness underneath himself.
“Tony,” Steve gasps, burying his face in Tony's neck. “Tony, I'm – I'm gonna...”
“Gimme, Steve,” Tony grins, then licks at Steve's perfect jaw. He knows guys love this, because he does, and he's a guy. Normally. “I want your come in me.”
Steve is biting his lip when he raises his head to look down at Tony. “Kiss?”
Tony opens his mouth eagerly, and then Steve's tongue is in his mouth, and they're kissing, sloppily and interrupted by the movement of Steve's thrusts. Steve moans against his lips and pushes harder, and Tony winces a little, but it's so good, and he wants Steve to feel that, too...
“Tony!”
Tony can feel it; can feel Steve coming in him, twitching against his new female body, shuddering and tensing up as he comes. Tony curls his legs around those bucking hips, grips Steve's arms hard, moans and wriggles and feels every second of it. It's so fucking good!
“Wow,” Steve breathes, shaking slightly over Tony. Tony can tell the super soldier is keeping his weight up on his elbows and knees, so he pulls down on that perversely broad back.
“Gimme,” he repeats, smiling as he feels Steve sink down over him. Heavy. Really heavy, but in a really, really good way. “Yee-haw.”
“My turn,” Clint says with a chuckle.
“No, I called second,” Bruce says, voice hoarse but brimming with laughter. “Or maybe we can pass him around? Also, what about Natasha?”
“I've got a plan,” the sexy Russian says, and when Tony looks up at her she's smirking. “Something that I don't think Tony's quite up for yet.”
“Are you kidding? I am so up for anything!” Tony scoffs, then wriggles a little under Steve. “And so is Steve, I see. Wow, Captain, you really are super in every conceivable department, aren't you?”
Steve meets his eyes with a bashful grin. “Uh, thanks. I mean, the serum...”
“So, double spitroast?” Natasha purrs.
Again with the chorus of male groans.
“Totally,” Tony says, holding his hand up for a fist bump. Natasha doesn't bump him, but she does help get Steve out of his shirt. Then his pants. In fact, all six of them are naked pretty quickly, considering Tony and Thor are the only ones who had already begun undressing before the great deflowerment.
“On the couch, everyone!” Tony cries gleefully, then crawls eagerly over assorted limbs to get to Natasha. “Do I get a kiss?”
“Hmm, no,” she says nonchalantly. “At least, not on these lips.”
Tony shrugs and ducks his head towards her thighs. “Whichever's fine with me.”
But Natasha stops him with a hand to his cheek. “Later. Right now I want to be fucked. Thor's mine first.”
“Alright, everyone, logistics time!” Tony declares gleefully.
They get Thor settled against one armrest, Natasha kneeling with her back to him and her hands greedily pulling Steve closer to her. Clint is back to back with Steve, looking weirdly small next to Captain America in the flesh, but with a surprisingly thick cock just standing at attention, waiting for Tony's mouth. Bruce is backed up against the other armrest, and Tony is between them, facing Clint's dick. Because there is nothing else in Tony's field of vision right now.
“Tony, is this okay?” Bruce asks, voice gravelly and restrained. “I need this, but just tell me... I can get a little rough.”
“Ooh, secretly kinky scientist,” Tony chuckles, then wiggles a little, displaying his sexy new hindquarters. “I like it. Come on, mount up!”
Bruce is thrusting into him in three seconds flat, and Tony cries out at the suddenness of it. His body is still a little tender after Steve, and it feels so good it's bordering on too much, but he just can't help himself. It's Bruce. Fucking him.
“I always thought it was a shame you weren't a woman,” Bruce growls, and then Tony is taking a solid pounding, rough hips slamming against his own until he can't draw breath. “I normally don't like guys. But you're... you're so...”
“Suck my dick, Stark,” Clint demands, a little breathless but still grinning. He tangles his hand in Tony's hair and tugs, very gently, to get the engineer's attention. “Someone should finally get to fuck your face.”
“If you all – Christ, Christ, Bruce, oh fuck!” Tony gasps, then licks his lips and looks up at Clint. “If you weren't such stiffs, someone would have been fucking my face ages ago.”
“Take it,” Clint demands, holding the head of his dick against Tony's lips. “Take it all, Stark, yeah, let me see you suck it -”
“Clint!” Steve groans, leaning back until his head is resting on Clint's shoulder. “Shut up, I can't... I can't hold back!”
“Wait,” Natasha gasps, and from Steve's groan Tony can tell she just tore her mouth off his cock. “Wait, Steve, I want you to fuck me, too.”
“But Thor -” Steve moans, and now even Bruce is pausing, waiting to see how this will play out.
“I can take two,” Natasha growls, and now even Tony joins the chorus of groans.
Thor picks her up as he sits down, leans back against the armrest, and brings her with him. Then Natasha gets to her knees, pushes up enough to make Thor slip out of her – and that's no easy feat, what with the Midgard Worm standing at attention there – and reaches for the lube on the floor.
“Thor, lube up,” she demands, and then reaches a hand back and begins prepping herself.
“I do not – oh,” Thor breathes, his eyes drawn like magnets to her fingers. Tony can see him twitch all over. “Yes. Odin, yes!”
“Steve, come on, closer,” Natasha tells him. Then she shifts, grabs Thor's wrist to make him hold it steady, and she backs slowly – so tortuously slowly – onto Thor's dick, letting it fill her ass. She hisses, drawing a breath between her teeth, and stops. Tony can see a fine sheen of sweat forming on her forehead.
“Good, come on, more,” she bites out, backing further onto that monstrous cock. “Slowly. More.”
And she's seated there, in Thor's lap, legs spread wide, her eyes dark and hooded and unfocused from the pleasure. All of Thor is inside her, and the Norse god's face above her delicate shoulder is euphoric.
“She grips me like a glove,” he breathes.
“Now, Steve,” Natasha gasps, reaching weakly for him. “Come on, do it, now!”
Steve slowly shuffles closer, then reaches between them to adjust himself, and Natasha lets out a single soft little whimper as Steve's ass cheeks clench – Tony can imagine, in perfect graphic detail, just how his dick is sinking into Nat right now. Slowly, they sink together, until Natasha is gasping and sighing continually and Steve is swearing softly into her neck and Thor is glowing with godly energy or whatever it is.
“Bruce, you fuck me and you fuck me hard right now,” Tony demands, body shaking from the strain of not rutting against something until he comes. Watching the trio in front of him is just too much. “Fuck me or I go find a dildo.”
Bruce resumes his thrusts, fisting one hand in Tony's hair to give it a good tug before he releases the dark locks. Clint, who had moved aside so both he and Tony could watch while the three others got started, is now getting back in position. Tony grabs his dick at the base, then puts his mouth back on it. The sounds are overwhelming; flesh slapping, the soft wetness of Bruce and Steve entering Tony and Natasha respectively, the constant whimpers of the sexy, lethal Russian.
“Oh, God, Natasha,” Steve gasps, and Tony can just hear the need in his voice. “Natasha, I can't go slow, I need... I want...”
“Fuck me,” she gasps, and her voice is urgent and shaky. “Steve, just fuck me, fuck, let me have it!”
With his mouth full of Hawkeye's dick, Tony closes his eyes and listens to the sounds of Steve coming hard. The super soldier is crying out, Natasha's name and Tony's and prayers, praise for higher powers, anything he can manage as he empties himself into her tight heat. Tony moans around Clint; he's so aroused his body is shuddering with the need to come again, but he can't, not like this, he needs more. So he sucks harder and bucks and shivers while Steve is groaning out the last of his orgasm.
“Holy Christ,” Clint grunts. “Tony, I'm gonna come in your mouth.”
“Yeah,” Tony says, but his lips are still around the archer's hard shaft so it's more of a guttural mutter. He sucks harder and starts using his hand to jack what he can't fit in his mouth. He wants it, wants the taste and the filth and the look on Clint's face as he comes. Tony moans again.
Clint doesn't cry out when he comes; he growls. He makes this deep, throaty sound of approval and his hips start stuttering against Tony's hand and face. Tony swallows some, lets some hit his chin and face, looks up at Clint and grins at the other man. This is so awesome.
“You're such a whore for cock, Stark,” Clint grins tiredly. He slowly pulls out of Tony's mouth and fists a hand in dark hair to pull Tony's head back. “Are you always like this, or did the sex change ray do something to your preferences as well?”
Tony is about to answer when they're interrupted by Natasha's wail as she comes, too. Tony shoves Clint out of the way so he can watch. Natasha is still leaning back against Thor, still being fucked slowly by that enormous cock, and the demigod has one hand on her breasts, petting them, and the other between her legs, rubbing her clit hard. She cries out again and again, her lips red and panting, her chest heaving with her gasps.
She has never been this beautiful.
“Thor,” she sighs, sliding both hands up around his neck behind her. “Mm. That's nice.”
“Understatement much?” Tony grits out, rocking back onto Bruce's thrusts. “Seriously, someone give me an orgasm right now, I can't stand this sexiness anymore.”
“No, wait, you need to feel this,” Natasha says, then hisses as Thor thrusts upwards again, still hard inside her. “Thor, Thor, stop, let's give Tony a chance as well.”
Thor's face looks as if it's physically painful, but he slowly stops thrusting into Natasha's ass. “You wish me to take him also?”
Clint gets off the couch and leaves for a minute, but returns surprisingly quickly with a wet towel. Natasha, moving slowly and just a little stiffly, moves off Thor and then gives him a hand with the towel, which makes the god of thunder hum appreciatively. Bruce pulls out of Tony even though Tony protests.
“This is going to take some reorganising,” Bruce says, and his voice is full of quiet laughter.
Natasha pushes them all around until Tony is kneeling over Thor, who is lying back against the armrest. When Tony starts sinking down on Thor this time, it doesn't hurt. Tony is starting to seriously love that first brief moment of entry; the second when a cock pushes into him and his sensitive body gives way. With Thor, that feeling is magnified and he feels gloriously full.
“Ooh, yeah,” Tony sighs, sitting up to experimentally rise and fall on that monster cock a few times. “Yeah, this is great!”
“Come here, lie down for Bruce,” Natasha suggests, and Tony finds himself draped over Thor's massive chest. Then a lubed cock is pressing against his ass, and Tony gets it.
“Hey, wait, I don't know if this is gonna work,” Tony says with a frown. “I mean, it's fine for Nat, she's done this before, but I -”
“Let's give it a shot,” Bruce says playfully, then starts pushing in gently.
Tony wriggles. The pressure is kind of intense, but not...
“Ow,” he says plaintively. “Hey, that actually hurts a little.”
“Christ,” Bruce swears, but stops. His hands on Tony's hips are shaking. “You want me to stop?”
Tony takes a deep breath and feels everything with his amazing new body. He feels full, and everything is burning, but not with pain. He needs, wants, more than he can articulate right now. He needs someone to touch him. He needs them to fuck him raw. He needs to see Steve and Natasha making out, oh, wait, that's exactly what they're doing. Right there. Over Thor's head.
“All units go,” Tony gulps, and Bruce groans with relief and pushes in all the way.
They stay like that, quiet and shuddering, for a few moments. Tony can feel Bruce pulsing behind him, inside him, and Thor nearly buzzing with energy underneath him. He's completely filled, impaled, held in place by their hard flesh all around him. Inside him.
“Wow,” Tony breathes. “Wow, Nat, everyone really needs to feel this.”
“Not gonna happen until we get ourselves one of those rays for recreational use,” Bruce snorts, then begins thrusting slowly in and out of Tony. Of Tony's ass, the engineer reminds himself and moans.
“Tony, I have been patient,” Thor gasps, and the whole godly ensemble of flesh is trembling. “Please, let me... I need...”
“Oh God,” Tony whimpers, because Thor is begging and is there no end to the demigod's hotness? “Thor, for the love of pie, fuck me and fuck me now!”
Thor sobs in a breath and starts thrusting, fucking up into Tony in perfect little earthquakes of need. Tony feels himself jolted back against Bruce for each thrust, and then Bruce picks up their rhythm and starts fucking in counterpoint, and all Tony can do is lie there, feeling their bodies move his.
“Oh, Tony, the look on your face,” Steve says, and Tony looks up, dazed, to find Captain America kneeling next to the couch, their faces surprisingly close. Those blue eyes are soft and almost unfocused with afterglow (Tony's favourite feeling ever). “You're so... you love this, don't you?”
“Rrghn,” Tony agrees, his mouth unable to work as he feels his sensitive nipples being rubbed against Thor's hairy chest. “Love you. All.”
Thor's hands clench on Tony's hips. “Tony. I will reach my...”
“Oh, fuck, Thor, do it!”
And wow, that was Bruce, the repressed scientist with secret kinks! And Thor does, and Tony watches his face and nearly comes himself, and then Bruce shouts incoherently behind him and Tony feels everything get slick and hot. Inside himself.
“Hey,” he manages weakly, because wow, he can feel their jizz all over the place, and apparently Bruce has been storing that for a while. Thor probably just always comes in significant quantities, in every conceivable way. He feels... kind of gross, but also so frustratingly horny and desperately needing to come that he doesn't care.
“Hey, don't, nrrrgh,” he insists.
Bruce slowly pulls out of him, and Tony finds himself lifted gently up and away from the tangle of manly limbs and sweat and chests and all good things. It's Steve; of course it's Steve. The paragon of human perfection has Tony straddling his lap, seated in the chair, in seconds flat.
“Want,” Tony elaborates, fucked stupid and left hanging (so to speak).
“Yeah, come here,” Steve says, smiling, and pulls Tony to him. He doesn't fuck him; doesn't let Tony get near his cock, only pulls the now-female engineer down for a long, deep kiss. Then Tony feels one of those broad, wholesome fingers pressing against his clit, and he cries out with relief.
“Come on,” Steve coaxes, rubbing steadily until Tony is a shaking mass of nerves in his arms. “Show me, let me see what you like. I want to make you feel good.”
“So good,” Tony agrees, clutching Steve's arms. “Gooood...”
“Harder?” Steve asks, suiting action to words. Tony gives a long wail of approval. “Yeah, I thought so. God, Tony, you're gorgeous like this, but I can't wait to see you as yourself, with your own body, writhing for me. Wanting me. I want you so bad, Tony, I can't wait to feel what you're like underneath all that armour...”
The words blur into a hot murmur in Tony's ear; his mind can't process any more pleasure, so it just focuses on what he's feeling between his legs. That hot, throbbing knowledge that he's going to come, going to lose it completely.
“Gimme,” Steve whispers in his ear, and Tony comes, and it's wave after wave of white hot pleasure singeing his nerve system until he collapses, spent, in Steve's superhuman arms.
“Well, that was awesome,” Clint says from somewhere behind Tony.
“So awesome,” Tony agrees, then presses closer to Steve. “Let's do it again tomorrow.”
“Meanwhile, we did find out a few things about the sex change ray,” Bruce says, and when Tony finds himself able to open his eyes, it turns out everyone have collapsed on the couch together. Natasha is in Thor's lap, but Clint and Bruce are maintaining a polite post-coital distance from each other.
“Uh, yeah, Tony, it's supposed to wear off in a few days,” Steve says apologetically. “But we couldn't make them tell us how to reverse it immediately.”
“Awesome, we'll have time for another round before I get my dick back,” Tony says with a tired grin. “And then we can all take turns being chicks. Or dudes, in Natasha's case.”
Thor looks intrigued. “I would make an attractive woman, I think. Perhaps the fair Natasha could be a man while I am a woman?”
Bruce looks unfazed. “Pass on the female Hulk, thanks. Also, I think we should devote a little more time to discussing the fact that Tony Stark is a woman, and the only thing we did about it was fuck him sore. Do we need to talk about team ethics?”
“No, no team ethics,” Tony insists. “I like being fucked sore; in fact, I insist upon it. So let's just carry on as usual, with the added bonus of team building sex when the opportunity arises. For now, I want a shower. I never thought about how gross this stuff gets when it dries inside a person.”
A chorus of disapproving groans tells Tony that his team mates do not approve of graphic details where bodily fluids are concerned. They do, however, appreciate his fancy steam room and the perversely enormous shower next to it. And nobody is averse to a mountain of Indonesian take-out, either.
When they're all gathered around the living room later, wrapped in fluffy bathrobes and Tony's collection of silk dressing gowns, and the food is served, Tony gives Steve a grin. “So, you wanna try the sex change ray? See how good you'd look as a woman?”
Steve frowns and looks down into his nasi goreng. “Well... If you wanted me to. I mean, if you prefer women. But I'd rather... I'd rather not. I like the thought of us, just us.”
Tony gives him the puppy dogs. “Just us, no team mates? No Natasha being the filling in our man sandwich?”
It turns out Captain America looks good when he gets so embarrassed he forgets to chew. “Like... like with you, Bruce and Thor?”
Tony shrugs. “Or like the spitroast, where she sucks one and gets fucked by another. Or we could see how she likes both of us going down on her. Maybe you could be in the middle; I fuck you while you fuck her.”
Steve grasps his hand. “That. Yeah, Tony, I'd like that. I mean... I like you. That's about as far as I got before you got turned into a woman.”
“Which turned out surprisingly well,” Clint adds, clearly having listened in on their conversation. “Hey, Stark, you think we could try all being girls? Hot girl gangbang?”
Tony's grin widens. “I think we could work something out.”