Chapter Text
It started at the banquet that winter.
Kevin was not drunk this time, but that was not surprising. Riko was dead. The Ravens were no longer a threat. The Foxes had moved on with their lives, into what they all hoped was a better future for everyone, one where they weren’t involved in a deadly mob war.
Allison thought Kevin would still be drunk, though. Thea had just broken up with him.
After the Nest was dismantled at Edgar Allan, after the Foxes won against the Ravens in finals last spring and after Riko was killed, Thea took it hard. Once a Raven, always a Raven (with a few notable exceptions), and Thea seemed to place part of the blame on Kevin for causing the team’s downfall. They’d managed to make it through the rest of that spring and summer, but last week, Allison had heard the news from Nicky that Thea and Kevin had called it quits.
She didn’t really care all that much. Yes, Kevin was hot (she had eyes, after all) but she’d never even considered going down that road with him. He was too single-minded, too Exy-obsessed, and damaged in more ways than one. (But then, weren’t they all?) And then there was the matter of Kevin just being a dick in general. Allison had never pictured Kevin Day as anything other than what he was.
And he came with a slew of baggage. Not that Allison wasn’t used to baggage.
Allison hadn’t been with anyone since Seth. She hadn’t even thought about it. It hurt too much at first.
But she’d had a year to mourn and grieve, and she was more or less healed by now. She knew it wasn’t that easy - there would always be the memories - but Allison felt better than she had in a long time, and that counted for something. She was on her way to whole again.
She just never expected ‘whole’ to include Kevin Day.
The winter banquet that year was tame. At least compared to last year’s. The Ravens weren’t attending, so there was no one for Neil to run his mouth at, and that meant Andrew didn’t need to step in. And with no Ravens and no Riko, Kevin wasn’t itching for a bottle. The atmosphere was docile. Calm. Allison was almost bored.
Twenty minutes into the banquet, she discovered she was wrong about Neil having no one to run his mouth at. Jack and Sheena, two of the new recruits to the team, had been dogging Neil since they’d showed up on campus over the summer. Allison could see Neil’s jaw tick every time Jack and Sheena teamed up against him. She had several bets going on how long it would take for him to snap.
She was only half-listening to the conversation as Jack threw taunting jibes in Neil’s direction and Neil shot back with his typical retorts. Andrew was twirling his fork around on his plate, uninterested in the proceedings as usual. He hadn’t stepped in yet where Jack and Sheena were concerned, and it had been months. If he hadn’t done anything yet, Allison knew the newbies weren’t a real problem. Annoying, but not a real problem. Not until they hurt or threatened Neil physically, and Allison didn’t think they would go that far.
The third recruit, the one Neil had picked (a girl named Sam), was sitting on Neil’s other side. Allison hadn’t bothered to get to know Sam all that well, but she seemed alright. Allison already knew Kevin didn’t think Sam was worthy of a spot with the Foxes. He’d made that clear the minute she showed up, and he and Neil had (predictably) fought over it. But by now, their issues were mostly settled. Sam had a habit of asking invasive questions that made the other Foxes cautious of her, but every time Sam felt the need to ask Allison about her past, Allison just stared her down until she shrugged and moved onto something else.
Sam was sneering at Jack, making crude gestures at him and Sheena. Neil turned away from Jack with a stiff posture and started a quiet conversation with Sam to distract them both. After a few minutes, they were both relaxed and talking a mile a minute about Exy.
Besides the in-fighting (but that was nothing new), dinner was uneventful. Kevin was hamming it up with the other teams, smiling for the public and piling on the charm. Allison could usually see right through it, but when she looked closer this time, she realized it wasn’t so fake. Kevin actually seemed . . . okay. She wouldn’t call him happy, but he wasn’t as haunted as he used to be. His shoulders weren’t as heavy. His eyes were a little brighter.
When the dancing portion of the evening started, Allison and Renee took to the floor. Matt and Dan were next to them, and the four of them danced in a close circle. The rest of the team was scattered - Nicky was dancing with the date he’d brought, Aaron and Katelyn were dancing with their arms around each other, and Kevin was on the sidelines, still socializing with the other teams. Neil and Andrew weren’t dancing; they were talking to each other near the corner. Neil was doing the talking and Andrew was listening intently, his eyes on Neil and nothing else. Allison smiled to herself. The money they’d won her in the bets she’d had going on them was nice, but she was also just happy for them, though she would never admit it. Allison liked what Neil was doing to Andrew.
She would never really get along with the monster, and she would still never forgive him for attacking her last spring, but she liked watching him with Neil. It was really something.
“I need a drink,” Renee said, leaning into Allison’s ear to be heard over the music. She was smiling and slightly sweaty from the close crowd. Allison nodded and took the hand Renee offered. They left Dan and Matt behind and headed towards the refreshments table. Renee poured them both cups of spiked lemonade. Allison took a cool sip of hers before she noticed Kevin approaching behind Renee, looking earnest. It was a strange look for him to have, and Allison raised an eyebrow over the rim of her cup. Renee turned to see what Allison was looking at. She smiled.
“Hello, Kevin,” she said politely.
“Hi,” Kevin said. He put his empty cup down on the table beside them and slid his hands into the pockets of his expensive suit trousers. It was a nice suit. Kevin always wore Italian. Armani or Versace, usually. Allison preferred Dior, or Givenchy, if she was so inclined. Her dress tonight was Givenchy, one of her best. Standing across from each other, she and Kevin looked like the most expensive people in the room. She’d always known that they would look good together, but it was a fancy thought she never entertained for more than a minute.
Kevin smiled at Renee and said, “Do you mind if I speak to Allison for a minute?”
Renee inclined her head. “That’s up to her.” She turned back to Allison with a question in her eyes, and Allison nodded, patting Renee’s shoulder. Renee’s smile was serene as always. “I’ll give you two a moment, then.”
“See what Andrew and Neil are up to,” Allison suggested, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “Get me some good gossip.”
Renee chuckled softly and shook her head as she walked away, leaving Allison and Kevin alone.
Allison towered in her five-inch Louboutin heels (red soles, the most expensive) but Kevin was still taller than her. That didn’t stop her from looking at him as if she had the higher vantage point.
“I assume you’re not here just to chit-chat,” she said. That earnest look on Kevin’s face was a little more muted now, almost nervous. The green eyes flickered down to the floor, and Allison noticed Kevin’s shoulders tense just a fraction. He took a deep breath.
“I’ve been working up the courage to say this for months,” he said quietly, low enough that Allison had to take another step forward to hear him. “I should’ve said it much earlier, but I wasn’t - I couldn’t.”
Suddenly Allison’s skin prickled with anxious anticipation, and she stepped back again, shaking her head. “You don’t have to say it.” Her intuition told her what Kevin had come over here to say, and she didn’t want to hear it. Not here.
But Kevin said, “I’m sorry. For Seth.” And the breath left Allison’s lungs in a quiet rush. She tightened her hands into fists, crossing her arms over her chest.
She had to look away from him, or she might’ve punched him in the jaw.
Allison closed her eyes and focused, using the deep breathing techniques Renee had taught her a long time ago. She calmed herself. As much as she could. She shook her head.
“Neil already apologized a long time ago,” she said.
“But it was my fault, too,” Kevin insisted. “And I didn’t know how to face you.”
“It’s fine.” Allison dismissed it carelessly, waving it away. “Whatever. Thanks for the apology.”
Kevin looked like he wanted to say more, but the look on Allison’s face must have stopped him. So he just mumbled, “Sorry,” this time an apology for bothering her, and walked away.
Allison watched his retreating back, her eyes narrowed at him.
Fucking Kevin fucking Day.
*
Wymack had the Foxes working out in the gym on the second floor of the stadium. Allison was doing squats in front of the mirror - she always liked to watch herself when she worked out. She wore pink leggings and a matching pink sports bra, her hair tied up in a high ponytail. Sweat dripped down her neck and back; the team had been at it for half an hour already, and they had thirty minutes left to go until Coach dismissed them for cooldowns.
Renee and Dan were doing squats with her, and facing the mirror, they had a view of everyone else behind them in the gym. Allison could see Kevin seated at the pec deck, eyes focused nowhere in particular as he pushed his arms in and out to the sides. He was shirtless, wearing only basketball shorts, and Allison admired his chest. God, he had a good body. She’d always thought so. It was fucking irritating, but she was allowed to look and admire from afar.
She didn’t turn her gaze away when his eyes suddenly met hers in the mirror, and she saw them flicker once to her ass as she pushed it out in another squat. Then Kevin pursed his lips and looked away. She smirked. At least own up to the fact that he was checking her out.
It wasn’t the first time - she’d noticed his gaze on her more and more in the last few weeks, during every practice or team workout. She’d put it down to his misplaced guilt and unresolved feelings over Seth’s death, and hadn’t given it a second thought. She was used to guys looking at her. That it was Kevin Day didn’t really make a difference.
Not much, anyway.
“Do we want to talk about that?” Dan asked quietly. She’d noticed Kevin and Allison’s silent exchange in the mirror. Allison shook her head.
“No, we don’t.”
“Are you sure?” Renee asked. “We’re here to listen if you want advice.”
“I don’t need any,” Allison said. She softened her voice. “But thanks.” Renee smiled at her; Allison smiled back.
There was nothing to talk about. Kevin was just a normal guy with hormones, and Allison was just a pretty girl.
They would never work, anyway. Their personalities were too abrasive. She was too headstrong with high standards and he was too . . . Allison’s thoughts trailed off. She didn’t really know what Kevin was, actually. Not below surface level. All she’d seen of him was his borderline alcoholism, his subdued and repressed emotional scale when it came to Wymack and Riko and Exy.
Now that Riko was dead and everyone knew Wymack was his father, Kevin was noticeably calmer and more peaceful, but she knew he still had trouble with drinking, and he was still walking the road to a normal relationship with Coach.
But that was all Allison needed to see of him to know him, anyway. She didn’t need or want to go deeper. She and Kevin were teammates, but they didn’t have to be friends. And besides, it was her senior year. There was no point getting involved with anyone a handful of months before she graduated.
Though Neil would’ve argued that being teammates made them family, and Dan probably would have too. Allison almost rolled her eyes. Fucking Neil getting in her head. She glimpsed at him and Andrew in the mirror; they were running on treadmills next to each other on the far side of the gym, Sam and another new team member named Robin on the last two treadmills next to Neil. Those four had become a gang among the team. The New Monsters, jokingly dubbed by Nicky.
Allison went back to looking at Kevin, who had moved to a bench to lift weights. Aaron was his spotter, standing over him while he pressed the bar over his head. His chest glistened with sweat, and since he couldn’t look at her now in his position, Allison let her eyes rove shamelessly over his body, down his sculpted abs, the V of his hips, to the outline of his bulge in his shorts, his legs spread on either side of the bench.
She licked her dry lips, her thighs burning as she finished her last set of squats.
Renee was looking at her with a knowing smile and an eyebrow raised, but Allison grimaced and tore her gaze away, shaking her head.
No. There was nothing to talk about.
They would never work.