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The Start
Louis has no idea how he ended up here. Some mainstream pop song is blaring on the speakers and there’s people surrounding him on all sides- some betas and omegas, but mostly alphas. Their scents are enveloping the room and digging into Louis’ nose, making him shudder and go dizzy under the pheromones. He’s sweaty from all the body heat and there’s a drink stuck to his hand, sticky and cool against his clammy skin.
He doesn’t even really drink, not because it’s illegal and he feels ashamed but more because he’s not too fond of the taste but he’ll still indulge every once in a while. He hadn’t really wanted one tonight, wanted to remain sober and aware, but Niall had shoved it into his hand before he could protest.
Niall, who had been right next to him a second ago but he’s nowhere to be seen. Louis wishes, not for the first time today, that Zayn had stayed behind on campus for the summer and would be right here with him. It’s a reach even if he had stayed. Zayn wouldn’t dare step foot into a frat even if the parties in the biggest alpha-beta frat in the university were known to be legendary.
Their reputation is what ultimately convinced Louis to try one out despite his prior reluctance to attending frat parties, and while he can recognize that it’s a pretty sick party (even in the end of the summer when more than half of the students are gone), he’s not sure how much he’s going to enjoy it.
And in fact, if Zayn were here, he’d probably be scolding Louis for what he wanted to do. Going to a party desperate for rebound sex is definitely a big no in Zayn’s book and he’d probably force Louis to not do it… Only, Louis hasn’t actually told Zayn that Sam broke up with him yet, and it’s been almost two weeks.
To be fair, he’s been pretty distracted by his heartbreak- always busy crying or shoveling down ice cream and other comfort food or screaming at the wall or scrolling through pictures of the two of them on his phone (he can’t even consider deleting them right now) or staring at the familiar contact and willing himself not to press the call button and beg for Sam to take him back.
He hadn’t told anyone but Niall who had invited him out to have some fun and take his mind off the numbing pain ingrained in his heart. But if Niall knew Louis was looking for a hookup to forget, he’d probably be more concerned too. He sighs and decides that he can’t stall any longer. Okay, maybe a little bit longer - at least long enough for him to calm down a bit. A drink, he decides. He’ll get another drink.
The kitchen is pretty empty save for a stray couple sucking face in the corner and a guy who’s out dark, slumped over the counter with his mouth gaping open.
He dodges the other people and pours himself another glass, humming under his breath. The sudden presence of someone on his right has him stilling slightly. The heavy scent of pine, vanilla, and the slightest bit of dark chocolate has his omega whining. He turns to meet the eyes of an alpha who’s already running his eyes over Louis unashamedly.
Louis returns the appraisal. The alpha is lean and broad, dressed in black skinny jeans, a thin white shirt that hints at the outlines of many tattoos and wearing a red snapback in his dark curly hair. Definitely a frat boy, but a very, very attractive one. He also has dark, intense green eyes that latch onto Louis’ own as he smirks. “Nice party?”
“Alright,” says Louis nonchalantly.
A thrum of anticipation runs through him, zinging through his body and getting stronger when the guy leans in closer, opening his mouth and saying -
“Oi!” someone shouts. They both jump, turning around to see another frat boy who seems a mixture of pissed and panicked. “Styles, we need you!”
The alpha sighs next to him and disappointment rises in Louis. It’s stupid- they spoke a total of three words to each other. Nothing happened. Yet Louis feels like he’s missing something important.
The guy gestures impatiently and the alpha next to him shoots him a rueful grin, before loping off. Louis watches him go regretfully. He seemed like he’d be good a good fuck. And Louis really wanted to be fucked tonight. Oh well, he sighs.
After gulping down another half of his drink and blinking dizzily as the familiar rush of endorphins and energy courses through him, he decides now is a good time to dance. He loves dancing.
Pushing past people and couples, he makes his way to the living room, heading to the center of the room and just… letting go. Dancing has been one of his passions since he was eight years old and now he’s here on campus, at a frat a week after classes got out, ready to attend a summer’s worth of an advanced ballet course at the university.
He sways his body, relaxing all of his muscles and moving gracefully. He dances for a few songs, completely comfortable dancing alone, but when a big hand slides around his waist, he’s not entirely opposed. Louis opens his eyes and blinks up lazily at the tall alpha. The smell of pine and vanilla envelops him. He shivers.
“Hey,” says the same alpha from the kitchen, the weight of his palm heavy through the thin fabric of his white shirt. His eyes are hooded as they wander over Louis’ body. “Mind if I join you?”
Louis breathes in more of his scent before shaking his head and turning back around: an invitation. The stranger’s arms slip around him and big hands grip his hips. Louis bites back a whine when the alpha crowds closer, body heat spreading over his back. “M'Harry,” whispers the stranger, soft lips brushing Louis’ ear.
“Louis,” he replies. Harry.
He begins moving again, drawn out and sensual. He can’t help it- his omega wants to show off how that it’s in the presence of a handsome, sexy alpha. Louis hadn’t come here with plans to hook up with a frat boy of all people but when Harry lowers his head to mouth over his throat, nipping lightly at the skin, he finds himself getting more and more eager.
Biting his lip, he pushes his ass back, grinding into the growing bulge in Harry’s jeans. The alpha groans, grip tightening. “Naughty,” he smirks, voice gruff and smooth like honey. Louis pretends like it doesn’t affect him and grinds back even more. He tilts his head back, exposing his neck right as Harry dives in to suck a particularly large bruise onto the curve of his throat.
He moans a little bit when Harry bites down roughly, leaning back further. Harry growls a little bit and Louis slips his arm back and around Harry’s neck, ignoring the strain from reaching up so high. Louis would never deny that he absolutely adores being smaller than his partners. He loves being cuddled and he loves when alphas wrap themselves around him like Harry is doing now. He feels safe, pine and vanilla whirling around him and seeping into his cells, making them relax.
Pheromones are filling the air around him and Louis’ dizzy with lust. The music changes into something slower and Louis’ movements slow down with it. Their dance becomes more deliberate and sultry. He feels Harry’s hardness grow against his bottom- he’s not far behind himself. Louis didn’t come here to get laid by a frat boy, no… But plans change apparently. He tunes back into the music. The beat drops and so does Louis, a sly grin on his face. Harry practically yanks him back up, groaning into his ear.
He spins around and slides his other arm around Harry’s neck, resting his head on Harry’s firm chest. The alpha’s arms envelop his waist and he’s tugged even closer until they’re not even dancing anymore, just swaying like a couple at prom. “Are you in this frat?” he asks, voice coming out slightly slurred.
Harry chuckles, the movement jostling Louis slightly. The omega just nuzzles into the soft fabric of Harry’s shirt. “I’m the co-president of this frat,” says Harry.
“Must be fun,” says Louis, mouth dry. He doesn’t even know what he’s saying anymore. His brain is going fuzzy like it does when all he can think about is cock. He’s pretty sure Harry has a big one. He wants to find out if he’s right.
Harry hums in acknowledgement. “Wanna know what one of the best parts of being a co-president is?”
Louis smirks. He knows where Harry’s going with this. “What?”
“A bathroom,” Harry says. Louis blinks, disappointed. Harry huffs into his hair. He dips in so his lips are once again brushing Louis’ ear and says, “and a nice bed.”
He doesn’t hold back the shiver this time. Next thing he knows, Harry is guiding him away, a solid hand on his lower back. He quells the urge to whine out loud as Harry presses down firmly, secure and safe.
Of course, because apparently the universe gets off on cockblocking Louis when he needs it the most, Niall appears out of nowhere as they reach the stairs. “Harry! Lou! I was just about to introduce you guys,” he exclaims excitedly. His speech is slurred from the alcohol but his eyes are focused as they take in Harry’s deliberately placed hand and Louis' flushed face. He smirks, switching his gaze between them smugly. “Guess you didn’t need me. Carry on, children.”
Louis blushes harder, a mixture of embarrassed but also relieved that Niall is too drunk to consider whether Louis is in the right mindset to sleep with someone right now.
“You know Niall?” he asks Harry when the beta has scattered off again, calling out to some random beta (Niall is somehow friends with everyone, Louis will never understand).
“Yeah,” Harry says. “He comes to every party, he’s a good guy.”
Louis nods. “Definitely… So, your room?”
Harry laughs. “Patience, darling.”
“Darling?” Louis repeats, amused.
“Darling,” repeats Harry, looking smug. Louis doesn’t normally go for cocky alphas- they always seem to be over-compensating. But there’s something about Harry’s confidence that intrigues him rather than disgusts him. He exudes self-assuredness but valid self-assuredness, with a hint of modesty Louis thinks, based off his comment earlier.
Harry spreads his fingers on Louis’ lower back even more and Louis shivers. Then they’re moving again, Harry leading and Louis following in a daze. He’s wet. And judging by the quiet growl Harry lets out, he knows it. They climb the stairs, pressed together. Vanilla and pine is swirling around him, grounding him as a haze of arousal overtakes him.
Harry guides him to a door at the end of the hallway. It says Harry Styles on it.
“Is that your real name?” he blurts.
“Yeah, if you’d believe it.”
Louis doesn’t answer. He swallows roughly, fighting against the thought that popped into his head. Louis Styles.
That’s wildly inappropriate, he thinks. And very primary school.
A hand grips him by the neck and his lips part in a hushed gasp. Harry nudges him inside the room, grip firm but gentle. The alpha switches on the light, illuminating a messy but cozy room. Louis blinks, taking in the posters, a bookshelf filled with a surprising amount of books, and- his stomach lurches, a sour feeling rising inside him… abandoned hockey gear.
A hockey player. Of course Harry has to be on Sam’s team. Louis never really came to any of Sam’s games and Sam never really expressed his desire for Louis to be there so Louis had absolutely no idea Harry would be one of his teammates.
The sour feeling festers as he realizes he’s having rebound sex with his ex’s teammate and that’s all types of wrong.
Harry might even change his mind if he knew.
His inner turmoil is cut off as Harry drags his thumb over his skin teasingly before yanking him into his firm chest and catching his lips. Maybe Louis won’t mention it… it’s not like he’s going to see Harry again after this.
He moans as Harry bites roughly at his bottom lip, slipping one hand up his shirt and the other one still unyielding as it grips his neck. He can feel the cool metal of Harry’s many rings, a sharp contrast from his burning skin. Harry walks them backwards until Louis’ legs hit the side of the bed. He stumbles back, lying back on the mattress and gasping as Harry follows, balancing over him on his forearms and leaning down to lick his neck. Louis closes his eyes and tilts his head back, exposing his neck for easier access.
A whine is ripped involuntarily from his throat when Harry pulls back. “I just want to make sure we’re on the same page,” says Harry slowly. “This is a one-night stand.”
Louis raises an eyebrow. “Oh really, I thought you were inviting me up for a game of Scrabble?”
Harry smirks. “Just want to make sure we both agree. I think you’re the prettiest omega I’ve ever seen but I’m not looking for a serious relationship. Not right now, at least.”
“It’s only casual stuff for you then?” asks Louis breathlessly. He internally slaps himself- why is he continuing their conversation when his cock is throbbing and slick is literally leaking out of his hole?
“Not even casual stuff unless I can’t help it during the school year,” Harry says. He licks his lip. “I’m a very dedicated athlete.”
“Hmm,” Louis says, coyly squeezing his bicep. “I can see that.” He leans up close to nip at the side of Harry’s jaw. “Now fuck me.”
Harry obliges, slotting their lips together and swallowing Louis’ moan. His hands are everywhere at once. Roaming under his shirt, gripping his jaw, sliding through his fringe, then dancing over his collarbones. One hand slips under his body to palm at his arse. Louis moans again, arching up into Harry’s touch. Harry groans, thrusting into Louis’ thigh.
Then he’s pulling Louis’ shirt off, running his hands over his exposed skin. Louis shivers, savoring the feel of Harry’s warm, calloused hands and long fingers. He can’t wait to feel them inside.
“You’re so gorgeous,” Harry murmurs, green eyes blown wide and fixed irrevocably on Louis and his now naked body. He shivers under the alpha’s heavy but admiring gaze. There’s something about being half-naked and vulnerable while Harry is still completely clothed that makes his omega go woozy with an urge to submit.
Except, those fantasies can wait because Louis wants to see Harry naked immediately. He clutches the material of Harry’s shirt desperately until the alpha gets the hint and yanks it off, tossing it almost across the room. Louis’ eyes follow the hard lines of Harry’s muscles, swallowing thickly when his abs clench. He’s fitter than he initially thought- lean and broad, exactly Louis’ type. And he has tattoos, fucking hell.
Louis reaches a hand out and traces the moth on his lower abs, shivering as Harry’s breath ruffles his hair. He flicks one of the alpha’s nipples and smirks when he growls, pushing him down again. Harry covers his body with his own and dives back down for a bruising kiss.
Louis whines into the kiss, grinding up into Harry’s hardness. “Please,” he gasps out, voice already wrecked and wanton. Do something.
“Alright, baby,” Harry murmurs roughly, nipping at the skin under his ear and mouthing over it to soothe the sting immediately after. Louis whimpers, clutching at Harry’s biceps (which he internally notes the size of, Jesus Christ). He tangles one hand into Harry’s curls and then he pulls, just a little.
Harry groans. “Being naughty again,” he hisses, grasping Louis by the chin. He licks into Louis’ mouth, swallowing his little whimpers and gasps. Louis hasn’t been kissed this thoroughly- this well in a long time… maybe ever.
He releases another wave of slick, trembling in unabashed desire. Harry’s hands skim over his sides, flicking at his nipple in retaliation from earlier and evoking a high pitched sound from Louis, then tracing over the curve of his waist with feather light touches. He slips a hand under the waistband of his jeans, teasingly, and then pinches the material of his cotton panties, eliciting a gasp from Louis. “Lift your hips for me, sweetheart,” he whispers, his breath caressing the skin of Louis’ neck.
Lifting up, Louis bites his lip as Harry gently pulls down his jeans, rubbing the soft skin of his thighs as he drags them down his legs and over his feet. Louis shudders at the gentle touches. They’re unusual for the situation but Louis revels in them all the same.
Then Harry ducks down and nips at his inner thigh. Louis yelps at the sting, releasing a wave of slick. The alpha peppers kisses over his sensitive skin, hands coming down to grip his knees and spread his legs. His touches are reverent and tender. Then he leans in, breath hot, and mouths wetly over the skin on his navel, one of Louis’ most sensitive spots. He squirms, crying out. Harry pins him down with steady hands on his hips, continuing to suck marks onto his stomach.
He bites down particularly hard just under Louis’ belly button and Louis convulses, legs kicking out. He’s leaking a steady stream of slick and his cock is so hard, it hurts. He can’t bear it any longer. “Harry, Harry, Harry,” he begs, words spilling like honey.
“I’ll take care of you,” Harry says, punctuating the promise with a bite on the soft skin of Louis’ inner thigh before soothing the sting with a sweet kiss on the same spot. “Dressed so pretty just for me, aren’t you, doll?” he murmurs. Then his fingers are slipping under the elastic of his panties and pulling them down. Louis bites down on his knuckles, feeling hazy and overwhelmed. His omega is whining for release.
Harry gently maneuvers Louis into bending his knees, exposing his puckered and pink hole. “Pretty omega has a pretty hole,” he murmurs before leaning back and shoving his own jeans and boxers down in one swift movement.
Louis exhales thickly, eyes fixed on Harry’s cock. It’s thick and long. And hard. He watches with barely concealed anticipation as Harry jacks off with controlled movements. The alpha throws his head back, groaning as he strokes over the head. Louis licks his lips.
Then Harry’s crawling back to him, fitting between his legs, and pecking him gently on the lips, tugging his bottom one a bit as he pulls back. His hands slide under his waist and grab at his arse, squeezing and kneading at his flesh. Louis moans, pushing back into the touch. Harry chuckles, pulling his cheeks apart, his index finger tracing over his crack teasingly. Louis moans again, heart pounding. Big hands are definitely his weakness.
“Wanna get my mouth on you,” Harry murmurs, and Louis just - can’t.
“Please,” he says, begs. He’s on fire, burning to ashes. The only thing keeping him drifting away is Harry’s hands, his voice, his eyes, pinning Louis to the mattress with their hungry stare. Dark, hooded, and utterly captivating- utterly alpha.
“Maybe later,” Harry agrees. And Louis doesn’t have time to overthink the later before Harry’s sliding his finger inside, gliding in easily from how wet he is. He keens, whining high in his throat. He’s fingered himself plenty of times in the past few months, but his fingers aren’t as long and thick as Harry’s. As all-encompassing and skilled. And-
Fuck, he sucks in a breath as he feels it.
Harry retracts his finger before fucking in again and this time Louis is paying attention as a cool, hard surface rubs against his walls. A ring. Harry’s still wearing his rings. He’s wearing his rings as he finger fucks Louis. He shudders.
“Like that, don’t you, baby?” Harry drawls. He’s not even looking at Louis. His gaze is concentrated on the slow drag of his finger into Louis’ fluttering hole. His other hand is firm on Louis’ hip, keeping him from thrusting frustratedly up into Harry’s touch.
After a few moments of hushed pants and stilted noises that spill from Louis’ lips despite his best efforts, Harry adds another finger. There’s two rings on this one and he feels their rough edges distinctively as the alpha scissors his fingers, fucking in deeper and deeper. He crooks them just right and Louis squirms, crying out.
Louis is completely slack, laid out and spread for the taking. He’s being loud, he knows, but he also knows that Harry loves it, telling by the way he grips him harder with each moan, whimper, or gasp.
Finally, finally, Harry pulls his fingers out and reaches for the bedside table, undoubtedly going for a condom. Louis has to bite his lip to prevent himself from stopping him. He wants Harry to fuck him bare, to knot him. And that’s certainly a dangerous thought for a one night stand.
So he endures watching Harry slide on the added layer of protection, using slicked fingers to lube up his length. Then he’s positioning himself in between Louis’ legs. Louis wraps his legs around his waist, pulling him in even closer.
He inches his way in slowly, allowing Louis ample time to adjust. Louis moans, writhing down on the bed subconsciously. Harry’s so big.
“So tight, doll,” Harry says, breath warm against his skin. His head is buried in Louis’ neck, biting down harshly on the point where his neck meets his shoulder. Louis yelps again, clenching down.
Harry doesn’t give much time to adjust before he’s pulling out and slamming back in. The headboard jolts from the impact and Louis makes a strangled sound, arching up.
He plants one hand on the mattress and keeps the other on Louis’ hip as he fucks in, harder and harder until Louis is sliding up the bed from the force of his thrusts. Pleasure overtakes him and he succumbs to the feeling, eyes shutting. Everything goes floaty and if Louis didn’t know better, he’d think he’s close to dropping.
He’s not. Harry’s just really good at fucking, holy shit.
Harry shifts, hitching Louis’ legs up until they’re over his shoulders and he’s almost folded over in half. “Flexible,” says the alpha, teeth grit. He sounds pleased, albeit tense, his natural instincts obviously very close to being unhinged.
“I dance,” Louis manages to get out, choking on air. Harry wastes no time in slamming back in, jolting Louis even further up the mattress. The angle allows him to fuck in deeper than before. Louis shouts, hands scrambling for purchase in Harry’s sheets. The next thrust has Harry hitting his prostate which he continues to hit until Louis is whiting out, spurting up his chest. He falls completely lax on the mattress, spent and dazed.
“Yeah,” Harry grunts, “I can tell.” He goes almost animalistic as he rams into him. Louis, dazed, can focus on nothing but the constant slide of Harry’s cock driving in and out of him.
“I can feel you here,” he says mindlessly. He punctuates it by cradling his stomach and Harry falters, jamming in one last time, as deep as possible before he’s shooting his load.
Louis frowns, disappointed he won’t be filled up. He loves it. Most people are annoyed with having to clean up afterwards, but Louis has always treasured it- the feeling of your partners cum dripping out of you and knowing what and who put it there. The feeling of being filled up and bred (even though Louis is always on birth control, he still loves the idea). The way alphas get all possessive when fucking bare- he has a feeling Harry is one of those alphas.
Alas. Harry pulls out and ties off the condom, throwing it into the trashcan across the room and somehow making it in. Then he just sort of just… stares.
Louis meets his gaze with hooded eyes. Harry’s looking at him almost reverently. It makes his omega preen. Then Harry’s leaning in and kissing him. Louis makes a small noise but returns it eagerly, tilting his head back as Harry licks into his mouth.
There’s cum drying on his stomach but he doesn’t particularly care at this moment. Not when Harry’s hand is holding him by his nape like that- so dominant and overwhelming yet still gentle and careful. “Good boy,” he whispers smugly and Louis keens, flushing all the way down to his chest. He feels light and hazy under the weight of Harry’s appraisal. But it’s not a bad feeling, no, Louis kind of loves it.
Harry leans down and sucks at his nipple and Louis makes a needy noise, wriggling away from the unexpected assault. The alpha bites his nub quick before leaning back with a smirk, “You’re a squirmy little thing, aren’t you?”
Louis can’t even reply, heart pounding too loud to process any potential answer in his brain. Harry thumbs over his probably-swollen lips, eyes admiring and thoughtful.
“Next time I’ll tie you up,” he says easily. Casually, as if it’s a completely rational thing to say. Louis chokes, mouth dropping in shock.
When he finally gathers himself, he blurts, “What makes you think there’s going to be a next time?”
Harry doesn’t reply at first. He kisses Louis and Louis once again falls silent, opening up for Harry’s tongue instantly. Harry squeezes the back of his neck, his other hand trailing down his side and under him until it’s teasing at Louis’ sensitive hole. Louis jerks, whining at the touch and Harry smirks into his lips.
“I have a rut coming next week,” he says, breath tickling Louis’ skin. “I’d really appreciate some assistance.” He’s still smiling cockily, hooded eyes flicking up to Louis’.
“What happened to, ‘this is a one-night stand’,” Louis repeats, amused.
Harry shrugs. “A one-night stand and a rut.”
Louis considers it. The sex is really good- that much he knows. Plus it would mean another distraction. Harry’s assessing him unabashedly. Louis stares right back, matching his blatant staring with an appraisal of his own. Harry is sweaty and flushed, hair hanging damp from his head and lips red and swollen.
“Okay,” he agrees. “Why not.”
“Great,” Harry smiles.
Eventually, Harry finds a towel and wipes Louis off. Then he hands him a shirt to sleep in, making it clear that Louis is free to stay over. Louis thinks of his bed back in his apartment and how Zayn’s back home with his family and he’d be alone. It’s easy to make the decision.
Harry also lends him a toothbrush and they brush their teeth together. It’s all awfully domestic and Louis finds himself giggling when Harry pulls funny faces in the mirror, red toothbrush sticking out of his foamy mouth. The alpha grins every time, pleased with himself.
Then they’re sliding into bed. Harry’s only in boxers and Louis is naked save for Harry’s shirt but it isn’t awkward. There isn’t any hesitation as Harry pulls Louis into his chest, one hand cradling the back of his head and the other one snug around his waist. It’s all much too familiar for what’s supposed to be a one night stand, but for now at least, Louis’ too satisfied and comfortable to worry about it.
Louis rests his hands on Harry’s biceps, cuddling into Harry’s chest and smiles when Harry kisses the top of his head, lips lingering. He’s happy Harry is like him in that he needs cuddles after sex- casual or not.
“Goodnight, Lou,” he says, his deep, slow voice sinking into Louis and relaxing him.
“Goodnight, Harry,” he says back.
The next morning, Harry fucks Louis against the wall, holding him up with one arm (a feat that makes Louis’ knees weak) and the other hand stuffing two fingers into Louis’ gaping mouth, commanding him to suck. By the time they’re finished Louis’ struggling to walk.
Afterwards, Harry cooks him breakfast and offers to drive him to his apartment, which Louis rejects even though he despises driving because Perrie was already picking him up to go for a manicure. It sounded like the perfect ending to an exhausting few days.
Louis doesn’t think of Sam more than twice, which he considers more than just a small victory.
-
Harry input his number into Louis’ phone that night, so over the course of the week they discuss the important stuff. No condoms had been the first point of concession. Knotting is essential for a satisfying rut and since they’re both clean and Louis’ on birth control, it was practically a done deal.
They agreed that kissing was okay too, and all of the other normal sex stuff. If Louis is helping Harry with his rut, he’s going to get the most pleasure out of it as possible. They also talk about limits in which Louis reassures Harry that he’s fine with rough sex including gagging, choking, marking, spanking, and other feral actions Harry may be desperate for under the haze of rut.
In the end, they decided that Louis would meet Harry after dinner right when his rut was going to start. Arriving earlier would be more preferable but Louis had a later class that day and he didn’t want to go straight from the studio to Harry’s frat with already-sore limbs and a hungry stomach.
He shows up to the frat at half-past 9, hair still damp from a quick shower and dressed in leggings and a thin shirt- oddly reminiscent of his dance clothes. He also brought a small bag with some extra supplies and toiletries for the next few days.
There’s a few alphas that give him curious looks as he climbs the stairs and one of them even gasps when he realizes Louis is headed for Harry’s room. He stifles a laugh and knocks on the door gently.
“Lou?” calls out a familiar, deep voice- it sounds deeper than before, a side effect of an impending rut.
“Yeah,” he replies belatedly, cringing at his awkwardness.
“Come in,” says Harry so Louis pushes the door and steps inside gingerly. Harry’s lounging on his bed lazily, dressed in sweatpants and a threadbare shirt that’s ridden up to expose his belly button and happy trail. Louis averts his eyes.
He’s not supposed to be the horny one right now, he reminds himself.
“Lock the door,” says Harry firmly, voice low and gritty. Louis bites back a shiver and obliges, checking twice to make sure it’s secure. Then he turns around right in time to see Harry rake his eyes over his figure, pupils dilated and gaze hooded.
“Hey,” Louis says belatedly, a bit awkward as he toes at the floorboard. He’s never done this kind of thing with someone he barely knows and he feels out of his element, nerves clawing their way up his throat.
“Hey,” Harry parrots, looking amused. He pats the bed beside him, not once moving his attention from Louis. “Come lay down with me.”
Louis drops his bag near Harry’s desk and slowly approaches the bed. Harry’s eyes close, head tilting back until a few stray curls are flopping down onto his forehead from where they’re normally pushed back. He quietly crawls onto the bed and lies down a foot from the alpha, not wanting to be the one to initiate contact since Harry’s the one who needs it.
Harry doesn’t hesitate before reaching out and grasping the hem of his shirt. He tugs gently, mumbling, “C’mere.”
Louis obliges, carefully resting his head on Harry’s chest right and placing a timid hand on his side, fingers curling into the fabric cautiously. Harry’s arms envelop him around his waist and shoulders and then Harry’s burying his face into Louis’ scent gland, groaning deep in his throat. Louis shivers, Harry’s intoxicating scent even more overwhelming than before. He still feels awkward, but much less so now that Harry’s touching him.
“You smell so good,” the alpha whispers as he nuzzles into his skin unashamedly. “Fuck.”
A smile quirks his lips despite himself. “Is there anything else we have to talk about?” asks Louis.
Harry exhales, breath fanning across Louis’ skin teasingly. “Nothing I can think of... but, uh,” he pauses to clear his throat, sounding sheepish as he continues, “I just want to emphasize how much this is just- you know, not serious at all. I’m not really looking for a relationship right now.”
Later Louis will find it curious that Harry didn’t say, “I’m not attracted to you,” and instead stressed how much he couldn’t be in a relationship, but for now he just says, “That’s perfectly fine with me. I’m not in the mindset to date anyone right now either.”
Harry pulls back to meet his eyes, brows furrowing. “Bad break up?” he guesses.
Even though he expected it, Louis can’t help the reflexive grimace. His heart pangs woefully. “Yeah,” he replies, just a tad too late to corroborate his feigned nonchalant demeanor.
Harry frowns sympathetically. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
“Let’s not talk about it,” says Louis, biting his lip. He hasn’t forgotten about his omission of important details from last week- as in, Harry doesn’t know he’s fucking his teammate’s ex. He’s in too far now to back out. Harry just nods, returning to his task of scenting Louis unabashedly. He noses along Louis’ throat and nips down at his pulse. Louis hisses and Harry presses his smirk into the now pink skin.
“What else should we talk about then?” asks Harry casually, right before he suctions himself to Louis’ skin. Louis whines at the feeling, subconsciously exposing his neck as Harry greedily sucks a red bruise onto his collarbone, big and unavoidable.
“Is it starting soon?” inquires Louis breathlessly. He suppresses another whine when Harry bites down on his neck, a low growl rumbling in his throat.
“Soon,” says Harry, vaguely. Then he’s tightening his grip around Louis and rolling them over. Louis stifles his yelp and bites his lip as Harry leans over him, forearms bracketing his head unyieldingly. “What are you majoring in?”
Louis rolls his eyes, shuddering as he releases a small wave of slick. “English. And a minor in psych. Are we playing 20 questions now?” he snaps, the pitch of his voice raising higher as Harry leans closer.
“I’m just trying to make some conversation before I bend you over and fuck you. It’s the polite thing to do,” Harry drawls, almost petulant. “And you didn’t ask me back.”
Louis scoffs. “Okay, Styles. What’s your major?”
“Music.”
“Music?” asks Louis, genuinely surprised. Harry nods. “So what’s your dream- hockey or music?”
“Hockey first,” says Harry easily. “That’s what I want my career to be but since I have to major in something, I figured I might as well choose something I like. I love music but it’s more of a hobby for me.”
“Do you play any instruments?” questions Louis, hissing when Harry bites down on his neck again. Harry gives him major feral and possessive vibes and Louis isn’t even someone he should feel possessive of…
He’s not complaining either way.
“Guitar and piano,” says Harry.
“Ah, the cliche ones,” Louis muses, an easy smile on his lips.
Harry huffs. “What, should I learn the accordion next?”
“That’d be more interesting, yeah,” says Louis teasingly. Harry bites his earlobe. “Geez, calm down, Alpha.” He meant it to be condescending but Harry stiffens, growling low in his throat.
Louis swallows thickly, blinking at the sudden outbreak in pheromones. He shudders, arousal pumping through his veins. Harry’s lips skim his skin from his ear, across his jaw, until he’s mouthing at Louis’ pulse again. Louis bites back a whine. Jesus.
“Okay, okay,” says Louis hastily, feeling flustered under the veil of Harry’s heady scent and the close proximity- all he can feel, see, hear, and touch is Harry. It’s suddenly too much to handle. He gently turns away from Harry’s incessant mouth and wills his heart to stop hammering in his chest. “I think I officially smell like you- you can stop.”
Harry pouts and Louis ignores it. To his relief, Harry moves off him with a sigh, plopping down on his side so they’re facing each other. Louis blinks lazily, eyes locked onto Harry’s intense and somewhat thoughtful gaze.
He decides he needs to distract Harry so he brings up hockey again. “You going for captain?”
Harry nods slowly, eyes lingering on Louis’ lips and eliciting a blush on his cheeks. “That’s the plan… I dunno if I’ll make it though.” Harry’s usual talking pace is more drawn out than the average person, however now he’s slowed down to almost a slurred drawl.
“Well, good luck,” Louis says consideringly. There’s something about Harry that makes Louis think he’s got a really good chance of being chosen.
Instead of replying, Harry’s eyebrows furrow and then his hand is reaching out to brush a few strands of Louis’ fringe out of his eyes. Louis stills, holding his breath as Harry’s long fingers brush across his hair softly. Harry watches him carefully, switching to petting Louis’ hair.
Unable to help himself, Louis practically purrs, sinking into the mattress in bliss. His eyes flutter shut and he hums as Harry continues.
The alpha is most definitely smirking as he notes, “You’re like a cat.”
Louis doesn’t dignify that statement with a response, nuzzling into the sheets under him.
Harry chuckles lowly. “My little kitten.”
The pet name sends a shudder down his spine. Louis flushes, bashfully hiding his face.
“Aw,” says Harry affectionately. “Do you like that? Being my kitten.”
Something uncoils in his stomach as Harry leans in closer, breath tickling his face gently. He’s the epitome of smug alpha and Louis would normally scoff but right now he feels like his heart is going to burst right out of his chest. His blush deepens when Harry’s eyes visibly darken. He’s mere centimeters away at this point and Louis is paralyzed in place, not able to back away even if he wanted to.
A wave of desire passes over Harry’s face and he blinks lazily, gaze sensual and predatory all at once. Louis shivers, recognizing the shift in pheromones.
“Is it..?” he asks quietly.
Harry answers by sealing their lips together. Louis moans as once again he is effortlessly rolled over, Harry claiming the spot between his legs. Harry bites down on his bottom lip and Louis’ lips part inadvertently, whining when Harry hungrily sucks on his tongue. The kiss is wet and demanding, firm and unrelenting.
Louis grips helplessly at Harry’s biceps which flex and strain against his fingers. Harry slides one hand under him and wastes no time in groping his bum. He bites down on Louis’ lip again when the omega’s scent intensifies: slick.
Harry grinds down into his thigh, hard and desperate. Louis whimpers, hands scrambling for Harry’s shirt helplessly. He tugs harshly until Harry gets the hint and leans back to pull it off completely, exposing his taut muscles and vivid tattoos. Abandoning any semblance of taking it slow, Louis runs his hands over his skin, tracing along the divots and indents until Harry’s growling and sucking a mark onto his collarbone.
Large hands yank his shirt up his chest to expose his tummy. Harry sucks a trail of love bites down to his belly button which he mouths at messily. “Gonna put a baby in you,” he murmurs hoarsely. Louis shivers, legs falling apart. To say he’s turned on by the thought of being knocked up is an understatement. Thankfully it seems Harry feels the same.
“Do it,” he urges. Harry shoves their lips together again, fucking his tongue into Louis’ mouth commandingly. His hands roam over his skin, leaving goosebumps in their wake. And then he’s curling his fingers over the waistband of Louis’ leggings, inching them down painstakingly leisurely. Louis suppresses his whine of impatience, disgruntled. Harry’s supposed to be the desperate one, for fuck’s sake.
Finally, Harry slides the leggings over his bum and down his thighs, breaking their kiss in favor of sliding them all the way off. He skims his fingers over each sliver of revealed skin- touches equally reverent and tantalizing. He caresses his calves and then his thighs, taking his time until Louis is practically trembling with need.
“Alpha,” he pleads, exposing his neck. He’s not ashamed of using his given assets. Harry hums his acknowledgement, pressing chaste kisses on his inner thigh until he’s reached Louis’ soaked panties.
“Pretty kitty,” says Harry, grinning obnoxiously as he fingers the lavender material. Louis smacks him in the ribs with his leg, scoffing at his smug expression. Harry’s falling into rut and yet he’s still ridiculous.
However, that ridiculousness goes out the window when Harry slides his underwear off, flinging it across the room. “Since you’ll have to take care of me for the next couple of days, I’m going to take care of you now,” he drawls, deep timbre sinking into Louis’ insides.
Louis can’t even comment before Harry’s gripping his thighs and pressing them to his sides to expose his leaking hole. Then he’s leaning in and licking up Louis’ slick like a man possessed. Louis jerks, caught off guard. Harry’s actions are unexpected but definitely not unwanted. He moans, spreading his legs wider as Harry really gets into it.
The slurping sound he’s emitting is obscene and Louis is already halfway to coming, his smaller cock impossibly hard against his tummy.
Harry retreats and Louis moans at the loss. Fortunately, Harry just turns him over gently before diving back in. He circles Louis’ rim teasingly, nipping at his cheeks in between. Louis ruts down into the mattress, pressing his wet eyes into his forearms as he desperately chokes back sobs. Harry flattens his tongue and licks up another wave of slick, groaning.
“Taste so sweet, baby,” he says, before pressing an open-mouthed kiss to his hole.
Louis moans, trembling with pleasure.
Then Harry’s tongue dips in infuriatingly slow and he gasps, coming on a silent scream. Harry doesn’t let up even when he slumps, still tonguing at his hole greedily, murmuring nonsense about how good Louis tastes.
Though his cock is rapidly becoming sensitive as it’s trapped between his body and the mattress, Louis finds himself unable to move.
He’s beginning to think he’s really going to enjoy the next few days.
-
Louis whines, burying his head deeper into the pile of sheets. He’s sensitive after coming just a minute ago but Harry hasn’t knotted him yet. The alpha’s grip on his hips is like steel- desperate to make sure nothing can take Louis away from him.
Louis wouldn’t have it any other way.
He squirms, arms straining from where Harry has them pinned down- wrists pressed into the mattress with one big hand circling them.
A slap to his ass cheek elicits another high whine and the following one makes him whimper, his flesh stinging and undoubtedly red with Harry’s handprint. He pounds in deeper before growling, his knot catching on Louis’ sore rim and joining them together. Louis slumps, tears in his eyes and muscles straining.
Harry maneuvers them onto their sides, nuzzling into Louis’ nape and scent marking him for probably the dozenth time. At this point, Louis is sure he smells like nothing but the alpha and he knows that’s what Harry wants. Louis hums in appreciation as Harry sucks a bruise on his shoulder. He’ll have a necklace of bruises by the time Harry’s finished with his rut.
It’s the second day and Louis is exhausted. But very satisfied. He’d been right. It is definitely good. They’ve gone at it so many times in the past thirty hours but every single round is just as good as the others. On the bed, on the counter in the bathroom, in the shower, on the floor, on the bed again, against the wall…
Harry is shamelessly doing everything he can to knock him up and Louis is enjoying every second of it. He’s seeing the extremes of Harry’s breeding fantasies play out in front of him now.
He dozes off for a bit, unbothered by the drying cum on his stomach and chest and the feel of more cum pumping into him from Harry’s knot, and is awakened as Harry slips out. The empty feeling doesn’t last too long however as Harry quickly stuffs two fingers into his sensitive hole. Louis hisses, squirming a bit in Harry’s hold. The alpha growls, splaying a large, possessive hand over his stomach and pressing down.
Louis relaxes, allowing Harry to plug him up and prevent his cum from leaking out. “You’ve definitely knocked me up now,” he goads, knowing Harry wants the reassurance. He puts his smaller hand over Harry’s and presses down gently on his tummy. “I can already feel our pup growing.”
Harry snarls, tugging him closer and nuzzling into his neck possessively. He’s six feet of sweaty, breathing warmth and Louis is not complaining. They stay like that for a bit but eventually, Harry starts rutting up against him again, cock growing hard against his bare bum cheeks. Louis grinds back into it but he’s exhausted, whimpering quietly as Harry rubs his cock over his crack. When Harry rolls him over, he closes his eyes and arches his back, presenting. It’s a show of trust and surrender of control.
Harry slides in immediately, not waiting to adjust before pulling out and slamming back in. Louis whines at the feeling, bottom throbbing from soreness. It feels good but it also hurts. “Gonna put more pups in you,” Harry grunts mindlessly. “Your body was made for this…”
Louis moans, muffled against the sheets. Harry jolts him higher up the mattress with every thrust, hard and rough. Harry reaches over and cups his jaw, tilting his head back so he’s gasping and blinking dazedly at the headboard as it collides with the wall over and over. Dimly, he wonders how thin the walls are and if Harry’s frat brothers can hear them- can hear how good Harry’s giving it to him. How good he’s taking it.
Harry slams into him again and Louis’ mouth opens wider helplessly. Harry sticks his thumb in his mouth and pulls at the side of his cheek he can feel the strain in the corner of his mouth. “Mine,” he says roughly.
“Yours,” says Louis weakly, as best as he can with Harry’s finger in his mouth. He closes his mouth and suckles on it, whining as Harry hits his prostate.
“Never gonna let you leave,” says Harry fiercely. “You’re mine. Gonna keep you barefoot and pregnant always. Gonna make you happy. Gonna take care of you- gonna keep you safe.” Louis whines again, spurting up onto his chest. It’s a smaller trickle than before since he’s mostly worn out, but he still feels marginally better. He slumps, letting Harry speed up to almost a feral pace, mumbling more things about knocking Louis up and keeping him safe that honestly make his heart flutter.
His knot locks in and this time, he just collapses on top of Louis, his weight heavy on Louis’ pliant body. But he doesn’t mind it. Harry wraps his arms and legs around him, covering him entirely- always trying to keep Louis safe even as his breath evens out and he falls asleep. Louis is relieved. His ass hurts like a bitch and he’s slightly hungry.
So, like any sensible omega, he rolls over and falls asleep instead.
He blinks his way into lucidity right as Harry drives into him. He yelps, hands scrambling for the sheets as once again just as Harry slams inside. This is the third time he’s awoken to a cock in his hole and he has to say- he’s not completely mad about it. He squints his eyes and glances at the clock, whimpering as Harry slides a hand underneath his body to tweak at his nipples. It’s early afternoon now.
The alpha is breathing- more like panting- into his neck, grunting and groaning on every thrust. Louis fumbles for his hand and when he finds it, he squeezes reassuringly. Harry bites down on his shoulder. “Lou-baby,” he says breathlessly, sounding a bit more lucid than earlier that day. A few more thrusts and Harry locks into him again, rolling them over so Louis is laying over his chest. He hadn’t come, but he doesn’t think he’s physically capable right now.
Harry runs a gentle hand over his hair, brushing his sweaty fringe off his face. Louis’ eyes flutter shut and he nuzzles into Harry’s chest. “You clear?” he slurs out with some effort.
“Hmm, yeah,” says Harry while one of his hands sneak down to feel around Louis’ enlarged hole. Louis hisses, batting at it half-heartedly. He feels Harry’s smirk as the alpha presses an open-mouthed kiss on the side of his neck. “Hungry?”
Louis’ stomach growls on cue.
“Alright,” says Harry, and then he’s shifting. Louis reaches back to cling to Harry’s neck, panic rising inside him. His limbs stiffen and panic rises in him.
“Wait, wait-” he fumbles, reaching out for the alpha blindly.
“I got you, baby,” says Harry easily, arms sliding around to hold him under the legs. Louis makes a soft sound. This is definitely not safe, he thinks. His back is to Harry’s chest and Harry’s gripping him under the thighs while Louis holds onto his arms. He’s pretty sure this is some sort of sex position but walking in it seems dangerous.
“Don’t drop me,” he says anxiously.
Harry kisses the top of his head. “I won’t, kitten.”
He takes five terrifying steps to his desk where the food is set up, before sitting down on the chair and rearranging Louis so he’s sitting more comfortably on his lap. Louis relaxes slightly, heart still pounding. “Don’t do that again,” he scolds with all the energy he can muster.
Harry chuckles, before grabbing one of the tupperwares and putting in the microwave. Louis leans back on Harry’s chest and sighs.
“Can we shower after this?” he asks.
“Okay,” says Harry, but he’s frowning. Louis rolls his eyes. Possessive bastard.
“If we shower, I’ll let you come on my face and then afterwards you can smother me with your scent for as long as you want,” he compromises.
“Deal,” says Harry.
The alpha feeds him every bite of the pasta and Louis lets him, content to just lie there, mostly motionless even after the knot in his hole deflates. He does make sure Harry eats his share too instead of getting distracted in his desperation to take care of Louis. “You have to eat, Harry,” he scolds gently when Harry protests.
Thankfully, Harry doesn’t put up much more of a fight and lets Louis feed him back. He also forces him to chug down two glasses of water and then sits still while Harry scents him again, not bothering on pointing out that they’re literally going to go shower and wash it all off in less than a few minutes.
After he’s satisfied with his claiming, he scoops the omega up bridal style- one arm underneath his knees and the other bracing his back. He’s careful as they make their way to the bathroom. Louis fits himself into the crook of Harry’s neck as Harry steps into the shower and gently sets him down.
It’s a small shower but thankfully the spray is big enough to submerge them both. Harry turns the water on medium-hot and then Louis makes him lean down so he can wash his hair. Harry practically purrs as Louis thoroughly massages shampoo into his messy curls, keeping his big hands firmly on Louis’ hips. His thumbs rub gentle circles over Louis’ hip bones, digging into the skin unabashedly.
Harry does him next, switching between mouthing at his nape and rubbing the shampoo into his hair. It’s unscented of course- the only thing Louis is allowed to smell like right now is Harry. And when they’re both mostly finished, Louis turns off the water and falls down to his knees.
Harry groans, gripping at his thick cock which has been hard since they got into the shower. Louis doesn’t say anything as he opens his mouth wide, tilts his face up, and clasps his hands behind his back. The alpha blinks dazedly, nostrils flaring.
“Fuck my mouth,” Louis prompts, kicking the alpha into action. Harry snarls, crowding closer and reaching out with one hand to grasp Louis firmly by the back of his head. He buries his fingers in Louis’ wet hair and tugs him close, using his other hand to rub his cock over Louis’ open mouth. Precum is smeared over his pink lips.
Unable to help himself, Louis’ tongue darts out for a taste. Harry hips buck subconsciously and Louis smirks. With another growl, Harry thrusts into Louis’ mouth- no warning. Louis lets his muscles fall slack, relaxing his throat as Harry begins to fuck in earnestly. He has pretty good control of his gag reflex but he still finds himself choking around Harry’s length as he thrusts in further and further. Harry seems to love it, fucking in until his head is brushing the back of Louis’ throat and he’s gagging at the feeling, eyes watering and throat convulsing.
He swallows around Harry’s cock, savoring the rich taste of skin and sweat and pure alpha. Vanilla and pine pheromones circulate the steamy shower, seeping into his nose and smothering him in their protective embrace.
“So good for me,” Harry praises and Louis’ omega preens. Harry fucks in deeper and deeper until Louis is sure he can feel the alpha practically down his throat. Harry’s hand slides along his head until he’s thumbing at Louis’ cheek where there’s an obvious bulge from the cock in his mouth. Harry swears, ramming in a little more forcefully. Louis gags, eyes watering. He does it again and again while Louis takes it, desperate to please his alpha as much as possible.
Louis opens his eyes, knowing how debauched he looks: big, wide, and glazed over blue eyes framed by his eyelashes that are clumped together while tears stain his cheeks. Harry comes with a guttural moan. Predictable, Louis thinks smugly. He swallows diligently but there’s just so much of it that some of it spurts out onto his chin and cheeks, dribbling down his skin.
Harry lowers himself to his knees in front of him and collects all of it on his fingers, holding it near his mouth. “Suck,” he says gruffly. His voice is deeper than before which means he’s losing lucidity again, soon to be fully under.
Louis sucks obediently, suckling around the digits and savoring the slight soreness in his jaw muscles and throat. “So good for me,” praises Harry, jamming them in a little further. Louis chokes, whining and trembling from overwhelming emotions.
Then he’s hauling Louis up, attacking his lips with a brutal kiss as his hands skate down his sides to grope his tender arse. He locks his legs around Harry’s waist, clinging to him when Harry climbs out of the shower. The alpha half-heartedly wipes them both down with a stray towel before carrying Louis back into the bedroom, both of them still extremely damp.
Harry starts working on another addition to his love bite necklace as he sets Louis down onto the bed, pushing him back to lay on the mattress. Louis’ legs fall open instantly and Harry takes his rightful place between them. Apparently they’re going missionary this time. “Need to get you pregnant,” mumbles Harry and Louis nods, tilting his neck to the side to expose his throat.
“Put a baby in me,” he says breathlessly, whimpering when Harry dives down to bite his bottom lip. He sucks it into his mouth, hands stroking Louis’ outer thighs possessively. Louis grasps Harry’s biceps helplessly.
A finger prods at his rim, making sure he’s still open. It’s quickly replaced by Harry’s hard length. Louis shivers. He’s so incredibly sore yet he still falls pliant like putty when Harry’s cock comes near his arse. His omega is built for this, he reminds himself.
“My omega,” says Harry reverently as he pushes in. “Mine.”
“Yours,” says Louis, half-moaning. Harry grabs his wrists again, pinning them to the mattress above his head with one hand. Louis shivers at the sheer size difference and how Harry can hold him down with little effort.
Thankfully (for Louis’ hole), this round doesn’t last as long. Harry changes angles halfway through before ramming into him deeper than ever before, groaning when Louis arches off the bed desperately.
“Fuck,” gasps Harry, eyes wide in awe and lust.
Before Louis can ask what he means, Harry’s pressing one flat palm over his stomach. Louis jerks at the touch, eyes lolling in his head until he’s narrowing in on the slight bulge in his tummy.
The slight bulge which is Harry’s cock. Fuck.
He moans at the sight, shuddering when Harry presses down. “This is where our pup will be,” he says mindlessly. Louis whines, body jolting with the image.
And then Harry speeds up quickly, fucking deeper and deeper until Louis’ vision is going spotty and his prostate is being hit on every other thrust. Harry grips Louis by the chin again. “Open,” he says. Louis opens automatically, confused.
Harry leans down, curls brushing Louis’ forehead gently. He furrows his brow, a concentrated look in his eyes, and then… He spits.
Right into Louis’ mouth.
The omega’s eyes widen in surprise but he swallows anyway, face burning in embarrassment and lust. Harry growls, kissing him harshly as his knot expands and latches. Surprisingly, Louis comes too, a pitiful spurt but an orgasm nonetheless. His body is thrumming in shock and pleasure.
Louis is still blushing moments later when Harry begins his frantic routine of scenting him, nosing along his jaw, the curve of his throat, his collarbone, and underneath his ears, mumbling on about how good Louis is, how sweet and perfect he is, how good he’s going to look filled up with Harry’s pups, how he’s going to be the best mom to them.
Spitting, Jesus. Louis didn’t know he’d be into that. But then again, it’s Harry. Judging by how it’s gone so far, whatever he does, Louis is very into.
They end up napping again, waking up for a quick dinner before going for another two rounds. Then they fall asleep for real, both realizing Harry’s rut is slowing down and it’ll probably be over the next morning.
Harry fucks out the last remnants of his rut under the glow of the rising sun, lifting Louis up and down on his cock with strong arms while leaning up against the headboard and sucking a bruise onto the juncture between his shoulder and neck. Louis’ thighs are shaking by the time Harry’s knot locks in and Harry gently adjusts him so he’s laying against his chest and sitting in his lap.
They both pass out and Louis awakens completely laid down with a tongue licking at his used entrance, leaving him conflicted on whether to writhe away or deeper into the rough, wet intrusion. The wave of slick that’s released from his hole makes the decision for him.
Harry pins him down with his hands on his legs, pushing them so they’re folded over and touching Louis’ sides. “Flexible,” Harry notes smugly, raising his head to meet Louis’ eyes, before plunging back tongue-first. Louis yelps as Harry fucks into his hole before retreating to circle his rim teasingly.
Louis shifts around, desperate. “Harry,” he moans breathily, drawing out his name helplessly.
The alpha responds by nipping at his rim. He soothes the sting with small kitten licks and then he’s dipping into his hole again, lapping up at the slick and making obscene slurping noises that go straight to Louis’ cock. “Taste like strawberries, so fucking sweet, baby,” Harry groans.
Louis shivers at the grittiness of his voice. He’s beginning to think Harry genuinely enjoys eating people out- his sheer enthusiasm and skill are obvious signs.
A resounding slap rings through the air as Harry’s hand comes down on his right arse cheek. Louis shouts, cock throbbing. Another slap follows quickly and Louis gasps, choking on air.
The licking doesn’t stop even as Louis squirms. Another two slaps land on his other arse cheek, followed by a soothing hand rubbing at his red flesh. He sputters, fingers scrambling for the sheets and thighs straining as Harry pushes them down into Louis’ sides more.
“My kitten,” says Harry, pressing a gentle, open-mouthed kiss over his hole. “My omega.”
Louis mewls at the tender display and blushes as Harry continues to press chaste kisses over his fluttering hole. He nips at his rim after the dozenth one and Louis convulses, limbs shuddering.
Harry leans back smugly, some saliva on his chin which he wipes away subconsciously. A second later, a finger is taking the place of his tongue and inching its way up to Louis’ hole. Harry fucks in hard and fast, and soon Louis is coming, moaning into the mattress and slumping backwards. His legs fall to each of Harry’s sides.
The alpha himself looks pleased and completely energetic despite just finishing his rut. He’s grinning as he ducks down to lick into Louis’ mouth.
Louis groans, turning his head away. “I’m tired,” he whines.
“I know,” Harry murmurs, nosing along his neck and pressing his dimpled smile into Louis’ throat. He nips at his Adam's apple playfully and Louis smacks him on the shoulder.
“Thank you for helping me out, baby,” he says, face turning serious. “You did so well.”
Louis makes a noise he hopes Harry will interpret as, “No problem,” before his eyes flutter shut. He honestly doesn’t know what to do now that Harry’s rut is over. The alpha is still calling Louis terms of endearment like it’s completely normal and doesn’t make Louis blush every time.
Harry kisses his forehead tenderly, before cupping his face gently and thumbing over his cheekbones. Louis knows he’s frowning. “I hope I wasn’t too rough.”
“I liked it,” he admits honestly, eyes still closed. He shifts, wincing as the sheets rub up against his more tender skin. “These bruises and love bites are going to last a while though.”
“Good,” Harry says darkly, before kissing his temple. Louis flushes, stunned by the affectionate display. “Means I took good care of you.”
“You did,” agrees Louis, ignoring the warning signs in his brain telling him this was bordering on relationship territory. His mouth quirks up mischievously. He pats his stomach innocently, “Definitely put one in me Alpha, good job.”
Harry growls, nostrils flaring, and Louis giggles, turning over in a silent invitation to be spooned. Harry fits himself around Louis and kisses his nape sweetly. “I’ve got you, little one.”
Louis smiles, heart panging. If he tries hard enough, he can almost pretend he and Harry are really together- together and in love. But reality is undeniable. Louis is still in love with Sam. Harry is focused on his hockey career and doesn’t want anything to distract him.
Louis is just helping Harry with his rut and by the time school starts up again, he won’t ever see the alpha again.
-
First Semester
Louis is jolted out of his ballet bliss by the clapping of his instructor. He zones back into his surroundings, grinning at his fellow dancers as he stretches his arms and legs, shaking off the tension from the past two hours.
There are few things in the world Louis loves more than dancing. Ever since he was eight years old, he’s been enchanted by the feeling of euphoria that overtakes him when he lets go and allows his body to glide with the music. Louis often takes other dance classes for contemporary or even hip hop occasionally, but nothing quite beats his love or devotion to ballet.
He’s been doing it for eleven years now and it’s still his safe space. Nothing can bother him when he’s in the studio, surrounded by some of his closest friends, focusing on nothing but the music and the sound of his heart beating in his chest.
The studio is an orchestra of hushed sounds. The light thumps as dancers saute and jete with the grace and beauty of swans. The small exhales as dancers leap and are lifted by their partners, high into the air. The grunts of exertion from those said partners as they aim to pull off those feats in a carefully manufactured display of effortlessness and ease.
And through all of it, the crisp notes of the grand piano played by Perrie ring through the room. Perrie plays the music for every single class and the expertly played ballet remains the soundtrack to their life for those two hours five or six days a week.
Louis loves all of it.
Maybe even especially when a class is so particularly difficult, he’s sore for the following days. Or when he’s struggling with a complicated composition and even though he’s frustrated, he can’t help but relax when he hears the notes play and he slides into fifth position. Even when Mara’s being a bitch.
Okay, admittedly maybe he was exaggerating the latter. Nothing can make Louis love having to interact with the bitchy omega.
He packs up his stuff and chugs down half of his water bottle (the other half having been gulped down at the one hour mark during their usual five minute stretching break), wincing at the soreness of his calves, feet, and back muscles. It had been a grueling practice today and even though Louis hadn’t felt the full effects until now when he was stripped of his dancing rapture, he wasn’t too bothered at the familiar inconvenience.
He hugs his closer friends goodbye, laughing at some jokes and forcing a strained smile when Mara makes a comment about someone from one of her classes that irks him. Then he ambles his way over to where Perrie is furiously going over notecards. The beta often attempts to multitask doing homework (even though they just started classes that day) and playing by studying in between their run-throughs but expectedly, it doesn’t work out much.
“Hey, Per,” he greets, amused.
Perrie grins, her previous distress melting away as she hops off the bench to give Louis a hug. “Good job earlier with those fouettes.”
Louis scowls. Fouettes are arguably the most difficult spin to pull off (and a major pain for that matter) but they’re also an audience favorite. Louis despises them- mostly because he struggled for so long with them and even though now he’s able to at least execute one perfect fouette per class, he still harbors that long-time resentment. “Fucking fouettes,” he says and Perrie giggles, but then her eyes widen.
“Hey! I got a shift off work this Friday, we should go out!”
Louis grins, “Definitely, I’ll ask Zayn too.”
“Oh yeah, he arrived yesterday, didn’t he?” asks Perrie.
Louis shook his head, “This morning. He only had an afternoon class but I’ve been out all day so I haven’t seen him yet.”
“Three months without your best friend, poor baby,” teases Perrie.
Louis pouts. “I’m lonely without him, don’t poke fun.”
“You’ve got me,” says Perrie, indignant. “Just kidding, invite Z too and say hi for me, yeah?”
Louis nods. “Have fun with your Biology quiz.”
Perrie groans, sending a glare over her shoulder at her abandoned notes. “Fucking prof announces a quiz on the first day, what an asshole!”
“It is kinda cruel,” Louis agrees. He reaches up to hug her again, yelping in surprise as Perrie flicks the waistband of his leggings.
“It’s always funny to see the newbies ogle you in these,” she says, grinning cheekily. “When Madame told them to concentrate on one point when practicing pirouettes, I’m sure I saw one of them staring at your arse.”
Louis squawks, turning red. “You’re lying.”
“I’d never,” swears Perrie, eyes wide and bright. She quickly sobers up, face morphing into a more hesitant smile. “Doing alright, babe?”
Louis bites his lip, ducking his head. “I’m doing fine, Per. Let’s not talk about it.”
“Okay, whatever you want Lou, just remember that I’m here,” she says firmly, squeezing his shoulder in emphasis. Louis nods. He knows Perrie will always have his back and he’ll always appreciate her unconditional support. “Now go and cuddle Zayn to death because you’ve missed him so much.”
Louis grins, excitement to see his friend for the first time in months growing in him. “I will! Bye, love!”
“See you Friday, Lou,” she replies and Louis throws her one last wave before grabbing his bag and leaving the studio.
-
“Hey, Lou,” says a voice as Louis unlocks the door and steps into the apartment. Louis breathes out, slumping in relief. He drops his bag and takes in the sight of Zayn Malik, his best friend circa sixth form.
He’s dressed in jeans and a soft sweater and he’s wearing a beanie, grinning at Louis from the couch. Seeing him just ignites Louis’ relief that he’s back. It’s always hard to go on break and not see Zayn, especially when they can’t meet up during the summer (much like this past summer, though Louis had other reasons for those missed opportunities).
He immediately barrels into the beta, practically climbing into his lap as he falls into him. Zayn just hugs him back- cuddles aren’t exactly strange when you’re close friends with Louis. “How’ve you been? You haven’t answered any of my texts this week.” There’s an underlying layer of concern in his tone which Louis had been expecting. He had gone mia on his best friend over the past week and he feels guilty about it.
Louis fakes a nonchalant smile, lips undoubtedly wobbling. He had been able to ignore his pain and pretend that nothing happened while he was dancing but it always comes back full force by the time he returns to the dorm. “Sorry Z, ‘ve been busy. How was your break?”
Zayn raises an eyebrow at him. “Right. Now are you going to tell me why you look like you swallowed something sour or are we going to continue the awkward small talk where you pretend like everything’s fine.”
Louis sighs but sinks further into Zayn’s hold. “I’m probably going to start crying in like five minutes,” he warns.
“I know,” says Zayn. He pats Louis’ head gently. “What happened?”
“Sam and I broke up,” says Louis sadly and his heart lurches with the weight of his statement. It’s been a week and it’s still almost impossible to get the words out even though he’s already managed to tell a few people- Niall, his mom, Perrie... He looks up to meet Zayn’s shocked expression and flinches. That’s always the worst part. “We had a nasty fight and we both said shitty things and then he said, and I quote, ‘You’re too much to handle’. So y’know, fuck him.” He intended for the words to come out dismissive but instead his voice betrays him, wobbling slightly.
Zayn is silent for a little bit, rubbing circles into Louis back soothingly. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t know how,” says Louis weakly. It’s a terrible excuse and to be honest, he doesn’t know why he couldn’t gather the courage to break the news to his best friend (though maybe it was because he felt ashamed- Zayn had been right all along after all). “This is where you say ‘I told you so’,” he says jokingly. It falls flat.
Zayn looks pained. “Lou, babe, I would never. I’m so sorry if I ever made you feel like crap about your relationship. I’d support you with whoever you’re with.”
“Yeah well you ended up being right so maybe you had the right idea,” he says bitterly. “I should’ve listened to you.”
“No, none of this is your fault,” says Zayn adamantly. He squeezes Louis’ shoulder. “You really loved him didn’t you?”
Louis snorts. “I actually told him I loved him that morning. I was sick and tired of walking on eggshells for the entire length of our relationship but things were going so well and I was so sure he’d feel the same way.” He blinks back the sudden rush of tears, sniffling. “He didn’t.”
His gut clenches as he once again replays that last moment in his mind. It was a horrible fight and Louis will admit he said some terrible things (none of which he truly meant) but he didn’t think Sam would crash the roof over them and end it. He thought things were going well.
“Lou, I’m so sorry,” says Zayn sadly. “That’s awful. Sam’s a dickhead.”
But he’s really not.
“Please change the topic,” Louis begs, pulling away from Zayn’s embrace to make eye contact. “I can’t talk about this right now.”
Zayn grimaces, clearing his throat. “I went to my aunt’s house for a month over break. Uhm, Liyah tried to sneak out to go see her boyfriend in town, brat.”
Louis smiles at that. He adores Waliyah, she reminds him of himself.
“I dunno,” continues Zayn, scratching his hair absently. “I painted a ton? But you already know that- I’ve literally sent you all the pictures,” he says, getting frustrated. He’s still rubbing Louis’ back, not complaining that Louis is sitting on his lap and soaking his shirt up with tears. Louis really loves his best friend. “I can’t really think of anything else.”
“No, that was good, thanks Z,” says Louis tiredly.
“Movie?” asks Zayn hesitantly.
“Please,” says Louis. He reluctantly pulls himself off of Zayn’s lap and faceplants into his own bed, blinking away the remnants of his tears. He’s had a week to recover already yet the pain hasn’t diminished in the slightest. Louis is still heartbroken.
Fantastic.
-
Despite Louis’ aching heart, life persists. He’s relieved that his and Sam’s schedules don’t ever align as Louis’ an English major and Sam’s in business- it means he won’t bump into the alpha and he can ignore him as much as possible. He doesn’t know what he’d do if he had to face the alpha again so soon, especially when his last memory of him continues to play in his mind on loop. His hurt and then furious face haunts Louis every night without fail.
He hasn’t seen him in four weeks now. Hasn’t talked to him, seen him smile, heard his lovely voice in over 336 hours. God, Louis loves him so much.
Louis couldn’t help falling for him- he was smitten from the start. His omega was seduced first then his heart and later his mind. Sam had been everything he’s wanted in an alpha: sweet, caring, protective, charming, fun, and he has the same morals and standards as Louis. The same wishes for a future. They were a perfect match. And it’s foolish to think he’ll be able to overcome this anytime soon. Nevertheless, life goes on. Four weeks turns into six weeks before he knows it, and it’s now been over a month since everything fell apart.
Classes pick up speed and Louis buries himself in his school work and dancing. He doesn’t see Sam at all- they don’t normally run in the same circles which may seem like a blessing now but really just makes him feel sad. He went from seeing Sam most days a week and texting in between those times to not seeing him at all.
That isn’t to say Louis has no information about him.
Hockey pre-game season starts up in mid-September and while Sam is a prominent player, he’s never been the quote and quote star. Louis has never been more grateful for that.
Instead of his ex-boyfriend, it’s Harry’s name plastered everywhere in the sports section. Harry Styles, star hockey player of the school team. Louis knew this already but now it’s thrown in his face every time he picks up a school newspaper. Harry Styles scores the winning goal in last Friday’s game. Harry Styles earns captain’s title for the season. Harry Styles. Harry Styles. Harry Styles.
Everywhere he goes, he hears the alpha’s praises sung by the masses.
Whispers of how well he plays in the cafeteria. Giggles and dreamy sighs from entranced omegas in his Literature class. Rumors of his escapades and dating history traded like germs even though Louis knows Harry’s true romantic history is a lot less dramatic.
Despite Harry’s newfound fame, Sam is still mentioned too many times for Louis’ liking. The other day he heard a whisper from a random beta in the halls: Did you see Sam’s new omega?
The question had struck him like lightning.
Sam’s new omega.
Sam’s. Omega.
It’s not him, is all he can focus on. Sam being seen with an omega. People noticing this omega and assuming they’re together. It can’t help but make Louis wonder how many people genuinely knew he and Sam were together.
Was he ever labelled as Sam’s omega by others? Or was he never really Sam’s omega to begin with? One thing is for sure: Sam’s omega won’t ever be him again.
Despite his determination to appear unaffected and alright, he still rushes to the bathroom after class, swallowing back tears and shaking. It takes him twenty minutes to calm down and by then his mascara is running and his face is flushed. He skips out on his usual library study time to go home and wallow under the covers with a tub of mint chip ice cream.
And now here he is, nine weeks post-break up, at another frat party. Not Sam’s frat- he’d never dare return there so soon, but a different one. He came with Perrie, Jade, and Zayn who somehow managed to be roped in by Perrie and Jade despite all his complaining but he’s lost track of them all. Zayn had disappeared outside where a bunch of guys are passing around a joint, undoubtedly still grumbling about being coerced into coming here. Louis had considered following even if it meant enduring Zayn’s whining, but he’s really not in the mood nor mindset to get high. It sounds like a mistake waiting to happen.
Perrie and Jade are somewhere dancing. He should be with them, having a blast and screaming at the top of his lungs with his favorite girls, but for some reason he can’t make his limbs move in the direction of the living room where most of the dancing is occuring.
So he sits in the kitchen, sipping on a drink he’s been nursing for the past fifteen minutes because yes, he’s resorted to drinking in his current misery. He’s never been this bored at a party before and he’s never felt the amount of relief he feels when Niall stumbles drunkenly into the kitchen and lights up.
“Louuuuu!” he yells, tripping his way closer. Louis finds himself genuinely smiling as Niall falls into him, swearing.
He’s squeezed practically to death by the Irish beta who plants a sloppy kiss on his cheek. “Haven’t seen you in a bit,”
“Sorry bud, been busy studying,” Louis says apologetically. He flicks the lei around the beta’s neck. “Where’d you get this from?”
Niall stares down, eyes crossing. “I dunno,” he slurs. “Think it was Amy.”
“Amy?” asks Louis interestedly. “Who’s that?”
The beta shoots him a sly grin. “I’ll let you know who she is after we see how tonight goes.”
Louis swats his chest, cackling. “You animal,” he teases. “Might as well just say you’re going to try to sleep with her.”
Niall salutes him. “I’m going to go find Amy and try to sleep with her,” he says outright, winking.
“Charming,” says Louis, very amused. He waves goodbye to his friend as he fumbles his way out of the kitchen, yelling after some guy named Brad.
Louis shakes his head, entertained by Niall’s antics and feeling a bit better. He takes another sip of his drink: a screwdriver (vodka and orange juice), and decides he will go out and dance. Perrie and Jade won’t mind the company. He puts his drink down right as someone else enters the kitchen. He’s turned away but he hears a coy giggle. Rolling his eyes, he turns and immediately freezes.
It’s a couple that’s stumbled into the kitchen. But not just any couple.
Because one of them is Sam.
Sam, with his arms currently wrapped around an unknown blonde omega and his tongue most definitely down her throat. Louis doesn’t know why, but his heart drops a little bit.
Fuck. Of all the places and times they could’ve bumped into each other, it’s now and of course, of course it’s when Sam’s with someone else. Another omega. Not Louis, someone else. His replacement no doubt. Everything is crumbling around him as Louis stands there, unable to look away. Tears come to his eyes and he’s trembling before he knows it.
Eight weeks and Sam’s over him already. Two months- that’s all it took to erase the year they spent together. He really didn’t care about Louis as much as Louis cared about him. The truth is heartbreaking, too much to comprehend. But it’s real. This is real. Sam is here and with someone who isn’t him. And he still hasn’t noticed Louis, too busy sucking the face off the gorgeous leggy omega.
Louis wants to hate her but he can’t. She’s just like him after all. She fell for the alpha just like he did. Who knows, maybe Sam’ll fall for her back. And Louis will just be alone.
He slaps his hand over his mouth, just barely muffling the choked sob that’s ripped from his lips. Out, he has to get out. He curls into himself, making himself smaller, more invisible, and then sucks in a breath, trying to slip past the couple.
It’s a tight fit but he squeezes through, catching a strong whiff of Sam’s aroused scent: coconut and sandalwood, heady and strong as it intermingles with the omega’s floral scent. Louis does his best to ignore it, pushing past desperately. Unfortunately, he accidentally brushes against an arm. The arm jerks and then Sam’s voice rings through the air. “What’s- oh.”
The recognition and horror in his tone cuts through his skin like glass.
Louis doesn’t look back. He flees, weaving his way through other students with a hand clamped over his mouth- equally for keeping himself from throwing up and smothering his sobs. He bursts into the backyard, shivering at the abrupt change in temperature. It’s windy outside and Louis isn’t wearing a jacket but he finds he doesn’t particularly mind. The cold is numbing.
He lets out a strangled cry, falling to his knees. He kneels over, tears hitting the pavement as he shakes. Sam. Another omega.
This can’t be the way it ends.
“Louis?” calls out a familiar voice. Concerned and worried. Safe.
It’s Zayn. He takes in Louis’ puffy eyes and sunken form with a distressed expression, before reaching out a hand. “Let’s go home,” he says gently. “C’mon, babe.”
Louis nods, falling into step with the beta who slips an arm around his shoulders. Louis slumps against his shoulder. He feels weak. Pathetic. He’s cried so much in the past month and for what? For an alpha who’s clearly forgotten all about him. He wishes, probably selfishly, that he and Sam are in the same boat. That they’re both hurting and aching for the other. That Sam is also replaying every single lazy day spent in his bedroom or messing around with his frat brothers or making out in the hallways on campus or fucking in the back of Sam’s car even though his air conditioning is shit and they were both flushed and sweaty afterwards.
Those memories continuously haunt Louis’ dreams, impairing his ability to get a good night’s sleep and leaving him worn and devastated, and meanwhile Sam’s going out and hooking up with other people.
It’s fucking horrible.
Zayn doesn’t say anything, doesn’t need to say anything. When they get back, he hands Louis a tub of ice cream which they’ve been saving in their mini-fridge for bad days and ushers him onto his bed, pulling up his laptop to watch Grease, Louis’ favorite comfort movie.
He tries not to remember how the last time he watched it was with Sam nearly four months ago. The alpha had serenaded Louis with Summer Love which was a fitting song to encompass their relationship seeing as they fell in love over the summer like Sandy and Danny before finally getting together during the school year. The parallels used to make him so happy.
Zayn passes out somewhere around 2 am, mouth open and snoring quietly. Louis tucks him in on the couch, not even considering trying to drag him to his room. Then he stumbles into his own room, tears returning now that he’s alone and his walls have fallen.
And even though he’s hurt beyond words, he still finds himself slipping into a familiar uni sweatshirt that Sam once lent him and he never returned.
The scent has long been gone but Louis finds comfort in the soft material anyway.
When he sleeps, he dreams of happier times.
-
Louis groans, leaning away from the toilet bowl in which he just emptied the contents of his stomach. He slaps a hand over his forehead, feeling achy, overheated, and exhausted. The nausea had come out of nowhere but it’s clear he’s not fit to attend his classes today.
He rises onto shaky feet, using the walls as support as he makes his way to his bed. Zayn’s long gone, up early for his 8 am class while Louis slept in (blessed with his first lecture at 11:15). He chugs down a glass of water, grimacing as his stomach twists again. He has a feeling he’ll be making a lot of trips to the toilet for the next day or so.
After emailing his teachers to notify them of his absence and make sure he’d receive all missing work, he swaddles himself with blankets, feeling miserable and self-pitying. He decides the best course of action for the next twelve hours is binging as many Anne Hathaway movies as possible starting with The Devil Wears Prada and maybe segwaying into the Princess Diaries duology (if only for the pleasure of ogling Chris Pine in the second movie, Louis has had a minor crush on the alpha since his preteen years).
He gets a text from Zayn wishing him a quick recovery at lunch as well as a reminder to feed himself something with substance and not drown his misery in Coco Pops and sour candy. Stupid, rational Zayn.
It doesn’t even matter actually. Because Louis finds himself, for the first time in his life, completely disgusted by the thought of eating cereal. Just looking at the box he keeps stashed under his bed makes him want to vomit again. It’s odd but considering how nauseous Louis is, not completely unexpected.
By 9 pm, he’s watched five movies and has switched to rewatching Gilmore Girls, a show he hasn't seen in years but he needs something mindless and somewhat witty to quell the queasiness in his gut.
Zayn pops in right as Dean is telling Rory he loves her and Rory is clamming up like a fucking idiot. For fuck’s sake, why didn’t she at least say something? For reasons unknown, Louis is getting really invested in the story even though he already knows what happens. In fact, he’s already cried twice. Even now, tears of frustration for how Rory handles her boyfriend’s love confession are bubbling inside him.
Odd.
“What’re you doing?” asks Zayn, looking between Louis’ miserable face and the laptop screen. “You don’t even like Gilmore Girls?”
Louis sniffles, “I dunno. I just got in the mood.”
Zayn’s bewilderment doesn’t diminish which is pretty understandable. “You feeling better?”
“Actually… yes,” says Louis. “I haven’t felt fully nauseous since the morning I guess. It was more just exhaustion I think.”
Zayn nods. “Can’t say I’m surprised. You’ve been working yourself too hard, Lou.”
Louis furrows his eyebrows, “Huh?”
His friend rolls his eyes. “You’ve been spending so much time studying lately and don’t think I haven’t noticed you’ve taken another session at the studio for the weekend.”
Louis scowls. “So what? I’m keeping busy.”
“‘Keeping busy’ or ‘hiding’,” asks Zayn, crossing his arms. Louis doesn’t respond. They both know the answer. “C’mon Lou, it’s senior year. You’re meant to have some fun- don’t let that asshole ruin everything for you.”
“He’s not an asshole for not being in love with me,” says Louis defensively even though he has no reason to stick up for the alpha now. He kicks out his legs in bed and slides down so his chin is touching his neck. “Or for falling for someone right after me.” He clears his throat. “Not that that’s why we broke up.”
Zayn rolls his eyes. “Well, you won’t even tell me anything other than you fought and he doesn’t love you back.”
“I’m pretty sure that gives you the general idea,” snaps Louis, crossing his arms. Zayn is right however- there is definitely more to the story but Louis is not physically or emotionally capable of dissecting that mess and he won’t be ready for a long while.
“Alright, whatever you say, babe,” Zayn sighs. “Now if you don’t feel sick, scoot over. Let’s watch Captain America.”
Louis groans exaggeratedly but scoots over anyway.
-
Louis returns to his lectures the next day and the day after that, however on the third day, he wakes up again with the familiar nausea and empties his (already empty) stomach in the toilet yet again. The nausea disappears pretty quickly this time so he attends both of his lectures like normal, but he feels exhausted.
Not to mention he’s sore. His ballet practice from the afternoon before hadn’t been unusually difficult but his back and thigh muscles felt more tender than usual. Needless to say, Louis is in a mood for the entire day. It doesn’t help that Zayn is hanging out with a few of his other art friends tonight.
Coincidentally, Niall calls him up after ballet when he’s achy and irritable and invites him to hang out. Niall’s roommate practically moved in with his girlfriend in her apartment so his dorm has been converted into Niall’s man cave. He keeps the spare bed in the corner to keep up appearances but really, it’s used as a couch. They watch a film and eat popcorn and Niall offers him beer but the thought of having it makes Louis want to puke again so he declines.
“Y’alright, Lou?” asks Niall carefully. Louis is hugging a pillow to his chest, knees folded. He knows he looks pitiful right now, he just feels so strange.
“Think I’ve got some sort of stomach thing,” says Louis, shrugging. “I don’t know what’s up. There’s no fever, just lots of nausea and throwing up.”
“That sucks, man,” says Niall sincerely. “Have you considered seeing a doctor?”
Louis shakes his head. “If it doesn’t let up in a couple of days, I will. But I’m just going to try and wait it out first.”
“I hope you feel better soon either way,” Niall says, patting his shoulder gently. “It’s kind of weird-” The beta stops abruptly, biting his lip.
“What’s kind of weird?” Louis asks.
Niall looks uneasy. “Nothing, never mind.”
“Niall-”
“So another movie?” the beta interrupts, way too loudly.
Louis narrows his eyes. “What the fuck were you going to say, asshole? Don’t bullshit me right now, I’ve had a really shitty day.”
“It might make it worse,” Niall warns.
Louis grimaces. “It’s about Sam, isn’t it?”
Niall shakes his head quickly. “No, actually it’s about Harry.”
“Harry… like Harry Styles?” Louis echoes, taken aback. He had not been expecting that. “What did he say?”
Niall sighs. “It’s not...bad. He just asked me how you were doing. He was really concerned for some reason- asking me about your health. It’s like he knew you were sick. I dunno.”
Louis blinks confusedly. Harry was worried about him? Why? How? “What was it exactly?” he blurts.
Niall looks hesitant but he sighs in defeat. “He just came up to me the other day and we were talking when he brought you up, asking when I had last talked to you-”
“Like, randomly?” interrupts Louis, forehead creased in confusion.
The beta shrugs. “Pretty much. I was a little surprised but I told him we have a class together and he asked me if you were doing okay. I was confused but said yeah, you’re okay. Then he asked if you were healthy and not sick and I was even more confused because I’m pretty sure there’s no way he could know that.” He glances at Louis who’s completely bewildered. “Now, let’s watch another film,” he says hastily.
Louis doesn’t protest but he knows he’ll be pondering the revelation for a long time tonight.
Why is Harry asking after him? They haven’t spoken in close to two months now.
But, more importantly, why does Louis care so much?
-
Thankfully, his strange sickness pretty much subsides over the weekend the next week passes in a blur. He and Perrie go out for lunch. Zayn and him spend an evening painting- Zayn finishing an art project and Louis just painting random flowers in bold, bright colors. It’s relaxing and it’s exactly what Louis has needed after an exhausting two weeks.
However, his increased soreness and achiness after practice doesn’t let up. He finds himself using hot water bottles on his lower back and feet way more than he ever used to. It’s strange but Louis tacks it down to him not getting enough sleep which is unfortunately very prevalent. He’s been sleeping much less than he used to and it’s very inconvenient. His brain just won’t shut off.
However, now it’s the weekend and Louis intends to get some very much needed rest and relaxation. He’s got face masks set away as well as an appointment for a massage to hopefully work out his tense, raw muscles. He’s looking forward to it.
He and Zayn return from the cafeteria where they had breakfast, chatting and laughing. They sit on their individual beds as they continue to catch up. Saturday mornings for the duo are always spent recapping their week. Louis already went and now it’s Zayn’s turn.
Zayn is halfway through telling Louis about his newest unit in one of his art classes when a wave of nausea hits him hard. He runs to the bathroom and just barely makes it before he’s spewing into the toilet. His best friend is shocked, but rubs his back through all of it, murmuring that he’ll be okay and handing him a wet towel to wipe his face with.
Louis feels faint and awful and it’s all really strange because he felt fine just five minutes ago and he didn’t eat anything peculiar and this is the third time this has happened and he really thought it was all over.
“Are you sure you’re still not sick?” Zayn asks, utterly bewildered.
He slumps, shaking his head. “I haven’t checked yet but I’ll bet a million dollars I don’t have a fever and I haven’t eaten anything weird. I have no fucking clue what’s wrong with me.”
Zayn opens his mouth and then shuts it, looking pale.
Louis stares at him, “What?”
“Nothing.”
Louis scowls. “First Niall, now you? Just tell me!”
Zayn hesitates. “Um… It’s just… you haven’t slept with anyone since you and Sam broke up, right?”
Feeling embarrassed because he never did end up telling Zayn about his lapse in judgement, Louis clears his throat. “Actually… I did sleep with someone.” His friend looks shocked and it ignites a defensive side of him. “It was just a one-night stand and then he asked if I would help him with his rut and…”
The beta's mouth drops open. “You did?”
He nods slowly, fidgeting. “Yeah, why not. The sex was good.”
“Did he knot you?” asks Zayn bluntly- he looks almost crazed.
Louis rolls his eyes. “It’d be a really unproductive rut if he didn’t.”
“You were on birth control right?”
He blinks, completely flabbergasted. “Um, yeah? I wouldn’t have let him fuck me bare if I wasn’t.”
“And do you know this guy well?”
Louis chuckles, “Not really. It was a one-night stand and then a rut, there wasn’t much time for talking. Why?”
Zayn grimaces. “I just… don’t you think these symptoms are a little familiar??”
He blinks again, uncomprehending. Zayn stares at him imploringly. The realization strikes him abruptly and his mouth drops open in shock. “What the fuck?”
“I’m just saying-” says Zayn but Louis cuts him off.
“No way,” he pauses to laugh incredulously. “I’m not pregnant, you idiot!”
The beta grimaces. “Then what’s wrong with you?”
His stomach twists as the statement sinks in. Louis’ amused grin falters and the barest beginnings of doubt plant a seed inside him. “Zayn…” His eyes widen and his heart skips a beat. “My heat is a week late,” he blurts, panic spreading inside him.
He hadn’t realized until a few days before. He doesn’t really keep up with his heat schedule since his body usually reminds him a few days before by resorting more to his inner instincts and it usually gives him enough time to prepare.
He had been confused when he realized it was the general time he should be getting his typical symptoms but they hadn’t arrived yet and seemed to show no signs of arriving soon.
It hadn’t been too worrying since his heat has been late in the past occasionally.
But now…
Zayn makes a sound and Louis stands up, stricken. “Okay wait hold up, let’s think rationally-” starts Zayn but Louis interrupts him again, pacing across the room frantically.
“I’ve been throwing up in the morning for no reason and my back and feet have been hurting more than normal these past few weeks,” he says, sounding almost hysterical. “And a couple of days ago when I went out for lunch with Perrie, I had the urge to eat avocado!”
Zayn understandably looks the most surprised about the last one. “Okay, but those could all be coincidences?? You’re on birth control, right? You never skipped taking pills?”
Louis shakes his head. “No, of course not, but you know birth control doesn’t always work. What the fuck Zayn, am I pregnant?” His eyes are watering and he’s hyperventilating.
“Okay, calm down, Lou. Deep breaths,” Zayn soothes, quickly coming over to him and gripping his shoulders.
That just makes Louis even more hysterical. “Are these hormones?!”
Zayn inches back, raising his hands in surrender.
Louis exhales shakily. Now that he thinks about it, his nipples have been feeling way more sensitive than usual but he hadn’t really thought too much of it until now. “Oh my fucking god Zayn, I’m pregnant.”
“Let’s not jump the gun,” Zayn consoles, but he sounds uneasy. “I’ll get you a few tests and we’ll see.”
Louis nods jerkily, feeling nauseous again. He glances down at his stomach, even pulling up his sweater to examine the skin. It looks the same as it always does, which is to say, not pregnant. But that doesn’t mean anything. Going by the last time he’s had sex, he’d hypothetically be at eight weeks which is still pretty early to be showing.
Is he really pregnant? Is this really happening?
“It’s going to be okay babe, you’re going to be okay,” says Zayn gently, bringing Louis out of his temporary panic attack. The omega nods again, trying in vain to slow his breathing. He feels out of control. Like he’s falling to pieces.. He’s twenty for fuck’s sake. Twenty! And pregnant?
Maybe pregnant?
“It’s going to be fine,” repeats Zayn, like a mantra.
“Get the test,” he bites out, trembling. He feels like he’s going to implode. Zayn must see the urgency in his face because he gets up and grabs his jacket hastily.
“Stay here,” he says, eyes wide and locked on Louis’ cowering form. “I’ll be right back.”
Louis nods, falling onto his bed and curling into a ball. He hugs his legs to his chest and swallows away the onset of tears. He can’t cry yet- not until he knows for sure.
“It’s going to be okay,” Zayn says a final time, before the door shuts and he’s gone.
The wait is agony.
Louis remains immobile on the bed, inhaling and exhaling on counts of five. He’s concentrated all of his focus into breathing deeply and has pushed everything else out of mind for now. If he stops, he’ll burst into tears and he can’t have that.
He finds himself staring at his phone, watching the minutes slowly tick by. Who knew time could pass so slowly?
The minute hand has passed the nine 18 times by the time the door flies open and Zayn rushes into the room, beanie askew and panting. He’s clutching a box of pregnancy tests in his hands. Louis’ heart drops but he scrambles to his feet all the same.
Zayn’s face is grim but he musters up an encouraging smile when he hands the box over to Louis whose hands wobble weakly. They don’t say anything.
Louis steps into the bathroom and locks the door, knowing Zayn is waiting for him outside if he needs him. Then he takes a deep breath.
You can do this, he thinks. It’s going to be okay.
He pees on the stick, feeling awkward the whole time but also too worried to really let the embarrassment settle inside him. Then he asks Zayn to start a timer, washes his hands, and then leans his forehead against the wall, breathing in and out. He zones out of the world, drowning in his distressed mind. If he’s pregnant…
If he’s pregnant, will he keep the baby?
He ponders this question for the next five minutes, stomach twisting with nerves and hysteria. He’s twenty years old, for fuck’s sake. This was never supposed to be a genuine concern. He’s always been safe and careful with taking his birth control injections and taking pills.
And yet, here he is.
Louis has always wanted kids, that’s the truth. But he never would have thought he’d be living out these dreams before he could even legally drink. Is this a blessing in disguise?
Should he keep the baby? What will his family say?
He can’t believe this is happening to him.
The timer rings, ripping Louis out of his inner turmoil. He staggers to his feet, fumbling for the phone and stopping the incessant ringing with trembling fingers. He exhales, squeezing his eyes shut as he raises the stick to his face. Panic bubbles up inside him. He has to look. There’s no going back. His eyes flutter open.
Louis’ heart lurches. Two steady lines.
He blinks, unable to escape the glaring truth. The image doesn’t change. There’s still two lines staring back at him.
Pregnant.
He’s pregnant.
With Harry’s baby. Fuck. He had forced himself not to think of the obvious paternal identity but he couldn’t ignore it now. He’s pregnant with Harry’s baby. An alpha he barely knows. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
“Lou, you okay in there?” asks Zayn nervously, voice somewhat muffled through the wood. Louis blinks, not at all surprised to find tears in his eyes. “Lou?”
Louis opens the door with shaky hands, still gripping the cursed stick with white fingers. He opens his mouth but no words come out- his heart is racing and he feels a weight drop to his stomach. Zayn meets his eyes and grimaces. He knows. “Are you going to keep it?”
Before answering, Louis just sinks to the floor, hugging his knees to his chest. It takes him a whole minute to control his breathing enough to answer. “I think…” he starts, voice trailing off lamely.
Zayn mimics his movements, cautiously sitting down across from him. “You know you don’t have to, right?”
Louis scoffs despite the tears streaming down his face. “I know that,” says Louis. He’s always been pro-choice (your body, your choice and that’s that) and he knows there are other options like adoption… but.
“I think… I think I’m going to keep it,” he blurts.
Zayn raises an eyebrow, “Really?”
“Yeah… I mean, I’ve always wanted kids… 20 was never the plan but might as well take advantage of it since it happened,” says Louis. He knows he probably sounds ignorant or stupid just deciding this quickly and casually, but he’s being entirely truthful. And, if he’s being honest, he’s still kind of in shock at the moment. But Louis has wanted kids ever since he first presented as an omega and realized he could bear his own pups whenever he wanted to.
Was now the ideal time? Definitely not. But Louis is never one to take things for granted. He’s pregnant now, so it seems only natural that he takes the chance. Or that’s how it feels anyway.
“I’m not making a definite decision right now,” he says patiently. “I’m going to think about it and schedule the first doctor’s appointment. Then I’m going to tell mom,” says Louis. “But I’m 75% sure I’m keeping it.”
It. Would his baby be a he or a she? He places a gentle hand on his stomach. He’s not showing yet but he will be soon. Soon he’ll know the sex and start thinking about buying clothes and setting up a nursery somewhere in their small apartment. Fuck. There’s so much that goes into having children but Louis isn’t too worried (well, maybe a little)- he has nine months to figure it out.
“Lou,” Zayn says, pulling him out of his daydreams. “That guy you slept with? He’s the father isn’t he? You and Sam never fucked bare.”
Instead of being revolted by the realization that Zayn knows that much about his sex life with his ex-boyfriend, Louis freezes, panic bubbling up again. “Shit, I have to tell him,” he says. He hadn’t really thought about it that much but he knows he’ll at least have to inform him.
And now, the more that Louis thinks about it… Harry’s definitely not one to abandon his kid whether he’s only 20 or not. Hell, the reason they even got here is because Harry did everything in his power to knock him up under the haze of his rut. And even outside of his alpha-induced breeding madness, Harry has a fucking breeding kink (and so does Louis for that matter) which provided no help.
His heart sinks as his brain conjures him another alternative to his situation. Where he’s pregnant with Sam’s baby and they’re still together. A world where Sam loves him and is ecstatic to be starting a family with him, college or not.
“Who is this guy anyway?” Zayn asks tentatively.
Louis swallows roughly, throat dry. “Harry Styles. He’s on the hockey team.”
“That sounds familiar,” Zayn says thoughtfully. “Is he a good guy?”
“I think so,” Louis says slowly. Harry definitely seems like a good guy but Louis is all too aware that being a ‘good guy’ only goes so far, especially when it comes to telling said person you’re having their baby.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
“Lou?” Zayn prompts worriedly and he realizes he had zoned out again.
Louis squeezes his eyes shut, willing away the sudden onslaught of tears that reappeared. “Yeah, I’m fine.” His future most likely includes co-parenting and shared custody with an alpha he barely knows, and that’s only if Harry actually wants to be involved. Or worse, if Harry decides to try to take it from him altogether.
“You’re telling him right?”
“Of course,” Louis says somewhat defensively. “He deserves to know… I’m telling him tomorrow if I can.” He regrets it as soon as he says it. Tomorrow is too soon. “Okay, maybe after the first appointment. It feels… too raw to tell him now.” He can’t believe this is happening. He’s 20 and pregnant, holy shit. It sinks in slowly.
Zayn nods but he still reminds him gently, “Don’t wait too long.”
“I know,” says Louis, huffing. He’s dreading it already which means he should get it over with as soon as possible. He’ll just pop in at the frat and hopefully not burst into tears. Then he’ll talk to Harry for the first time in two months. Totally easy. Hey Harry, remember when we realized that we both get off on the idea of you knocking me up with your pups? Well… surprise!
“I just want you to know I support you in whatever you end up deciding to do, babe,” says Zayn, interrupting his internal monologue. He reaches out and squeezes Louis’ shoulder gently. Louis meets the eyes of his closest friend and is warmed by the empathy and sincerity in his gaze. The appreciation only grows when the beta continues with, “You’re not alone.”
“Thanks, Z,” he says softly, before pulling his friend into a hug. Zayn pets his hair and he relaxes, body falling lax.
Zayn chuckles. “That always works on you. You’re like a kitten.”
Kitten. Louis tenses.
-
The rest of the morning passes in a bit of a haze. Louis ends up taking another two tests, not wanting all of this worrying and planning to be for nothing. Three tests confirm the notion as a hard fact. He is pregnant. About two months in and going strong.
At first he panics a bit, unable to remember if he’s done something potentially detrimental, or worse, dangerous, to the bundle of cells growing in his stomach. But Zayn points out that he hasn’t had any alcohol this term save for that one drink at Niall’s party a couple of weeks ago and one drink isn’t enough to leave too big of a negative impact. Louis is relieved. He then realizes that he’ll have to take a break from dancing for a few months, especially when he gets too big to physically move.
The realization makes him cry a bit but Louis can now justifiably use hormones as his excuse for being an emotional mess so he wallows in self-pity for as long as he wants before emailing the company director and informing him of the situation. He also emails the school to ask what their policies are for allowing pregnant omegas to continue their working since Louis works as a library aid a couple times a week. Then he sets up his doctor’s appointment for the following week. Now that he’s aware of his pregnancy, he’s going to do everything he can to protect what will become his future pup. His sudden protectiveness surprises him at first, but he feels like he falls into the role fairly easily, all things considered.
Then Zayn forces him to eat lunch at 12:30, fussing over him and making sure he eats something healthy. Louis gets exasperated pretty quickly but he truly appreciates it at the same time. He’s so lucky Zayn has his back.
And he knows when he tells Perrie, the beta will have his back just as much.
At 2 pm, Louis finally musters up the courage to tackle the most (okay, second most) worrisome part of the whole process: telling his mom.
He locks himself up in his room and bundles himself in blankets despite the hot weather. Then he dials the familiar number and swallows nervously.
Jay picks up on the third ring, greeting Louis with an enthusiastic and pleased, “My baby! How are you my love?”
Louis smiles, tension leaking from his rigid body at the loving voice of his mother. “Hey, Mom,” he says. “I’m alright.” Not exactly a lie. “I actually wanted to talk to you about something.”
“Oh, what is it, darling?” she asks, curiosity evident in her tone. There’s a pause, and then, “Did you meet someone?”
Louis flinches. He hadn’t expected that and now that he thinks about it, he’s pretty sure that sort of someone wasn’t in his cards for a long time. “Um, no… But there is someone else who recently became part of my life,” he continues, fiddling with his sweater nervously. He swallows. Here goes...
“Who?” asks Jay, sounding understandably confused.
“Mom,” says Louis, shutting his eyes quickly. He had initially planned on building up to it- starting with the usual small talk, asking about the girls and their antics, and inevitably stalling as long as possible before he had to bring up the elephant in the room. But now that he’s here, he just wants to get it out. He wants the comfort and assurance he knows his mother will provide. “Mom, I’m pregnant.”
There’s a stagnant pause in which all Louis can hear is the sound of his mother’s heavy breathing. Her breath hitches as she processes what Louis has just revealed and he winces, squeezing his eyes shut. Another impossible thirty seconds pass and then, “Louis, sweetheart, did I hear that correctly. You’re-”
“Pregnant,” Louis finishes, blinking back another set of tears. He’s cried so much today and it’s still only the early afternoon. He knows he has plenty of tears left to cry in the coming months. He sniffles, “I’m having a baby, Mommy.”
“Oh my,” says Jay, sounding a mixture of shocked and dazed. There is no world where she'd predict this turn of events.
In lieu of a response, Louis chokes out a sob, slapping a hand over his mouth and curling over. Jay makes a distressed sound but Louis is unable to reassure her, tears falling from his eyes freely now.
“Baby. Oh, baby,” Jay says worriedly. “Darling, it’s going to be okay.”
Louis squeezes his eyes shut, hunching in on himself.
Jay continues to reassure him. “Everything’s going to be okay. I’m here lovie, I’m here for you.” She cooes at him over the line. “Deep breaths, darling.”
He follows her cues, inhaling and exhaling shakily until he can breathe normally again. He wipes at his eyes miserably, sniffling.
His mother waits a few seconds before asking tentatively, “How?” It’s gentle and sweet, far from the accusation Louis had irrationally been expecting.
His first instinct is to shrug even though she can’t see him. “I’ve been on birth control forever, but I guess it really is true when they say it doesn’t always work.”
“How long are you?” Jay asks next, keeping her tone even and kind.
“Eight weeks, about,” Louis reveals. He fidgets with his sweater nervously.
“And you’re keeping it?”
Here comes the tough part. “I don’t know… I want to, but I don’t know if I’m ready. What if I’m not a good enough, Mom?” he asks, words coming out timid and unsure.
“Louis,” Jay exclaims, indignantly. “You’ll be a fantastic mother, don’t talk about yourself that way!”
Louis chuckles at the affronted retort. “Thanks mom, but… do you think I’m being irresponsible? Thinking I can raise a child on my own at 20 years old while I’m still trying to finish my major?”
“No, baby, not irresponsible,” Jay coos. “You’re so brave. I’ll support you in whatever you decide, always. And you’re not on your own- you have me. I’ve been through five pregnancies, I think I know or a thing or two about the whole process.” Louis grins. “And you have Zayn I presume?”
Louis grins wider. “Yeah. He’s definitely getting the godfather.”
“I’m sure he’ll be fantastic,” Jay says.
An awkward silence befalls them and Louis rolls his eyes, certain of his mom’s inability to know how to bring up her next question.
“I know you’re trying really hard not to ask me who the father is,” he says flatly, deciding to bite the bullet.
He hears his mother sigh. “You got me.” She pauses hesitantly. “Is it Sam?” There’s barely concealed anger in her tone which Louis can’t blame her for considering she was the first person he told about the breakup outside of Perrie.
“Nope,” he says quickly. What a world that would be- pregnant with your ex-who-dumped-you’s baby. But then again, maybe the reality is somewhat worse. He bites his lip, not knowing how to explain to his mother. In the end he just goes for it. “It’s a guy I helped out on his rut.” He winces in preparation.
“Oh,” Jay says after a moment.
“Yeah,” Louis says, chuckling a bit self-deprecatingly. “His name is Harry. He seems nice but…”
“You don't know what he’ll want to do,” Jay finishes. “I’m sorry, darling.”
Louis shrugs before remembering she can’t see him. He nuzzles deeper into his cocoon of blankets, sighing. “I’m the one who agreed.”
“Maybe it’ll work out,” Jay suggests optimistically.
“Hmm,” Louis says dubiously, thoughts souring as he realizes what’s ahead of him. “I have to tell him soon.”
“You do,” Jay agrees. “I hope he’s a decent bloke and will help out.”
“I think he might,” Louis admits. Maybe he’s just naively faithful, but he has a feeling.
“I hope so too, boo,” says Jay. “I hate to leave you like this, but I have to go pick up the girls from school, but call me first thing tomorrow, okay sweetheart? And let me know if you make a decision. I’m going to send you links to some helpful resources for what to do when you’re expecting. And we’re going to have a conversation about vitamins soon, so remind me, will you? Have you made an appointment with the doctor yet?”
Louis rolls his eyes again, but it’s full of warmth. “Yes Mom, I’ve made an appointment and yes, I’ll read everything I can get my hands on.” He glances down at his stomach and places a hesitant hand on the nonexistent pudge. His heart pangs. One day. “Thank you.”
“I’ll always be here for my boy,” Jay says sweetly and Louis sniffles. He loves his mother so much. “Take care of yourself. I’ll make sure Zayn takes care of you too. Stay safe and take it easy, I love you so much darling.”
“And I love you too,” Louis says wetly. He has the best mother. “I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Bye, Mom.”
“Bye, baby.”
He puts down the phone, biting his lip. He feels a lot better after talking to his mom, despite it only being a few minutes of conversation. Jay has been the most incredible mother to Louis all his life, even when it was just the two of them and equally as much when she had four other pups to worry about. Louis is glad he has such a great role model.
If he’ll be a good mother, it’s only because Jay raised him to be what he is. And he’ll do his best to raise his kid (or in the future, kids) the same nurturing, honest, and kind way Jay raised him. He wipes his eyes again, feeling very emotional.
Damn hormones.
-
Perrie chatters on about the latest escapades of her and the girls and Louis listens diligently. His heart, however, is thrumming with anticipation. It’s Wednesday and they’re having lunch. Louis’ appointment is for Saturday. Louis wants to break the news to Perrie before then which is why he invited her out to eat today.
He’s going to tell her.
“Anyway, what’s going on with you?” Perrie asks, sipping at her latte. “How’ve you been doing?”
Louis smiles awkwardly. “I’ve been doing pretty well but, there’s something… There’s something I have to tell you.”
Perrie turns serious very fast. “You can tell me anything, babe,” she reminds him and he nods. He knows.
“Um well, so remember how I was sick last week?” he starts off. He doesn’t know how to go about this. Blurt it out like he did with his mom? Work up to it?
“Yeah,” Perrie acknowledges. “Feeling better?”
“I mean, kind of?” Louis says. Morning sickness has become more and more prevalent in his morning routine. He wakes up fine but within a few hours, he’s completely nauseous and two times out of three, he ends up puking up his breakfast and pressing his forehead into the cold tile of the bathroom until the bile goes away. “Not really. But there’s a reason for that.”
“Did you talk to a doctor?” asks Perrie, still completely oblivious to what Louis’ about to tell her.
“Nope, but I am on Saturday,” he says, smiling a bit. “Listen, Per… I’m pregnant.”
Perrie’s jaw drops. For a minute there’s absolute silence as his friend gawks at him. And then, “You’re pregnant?” she shouts.
Louis flinches, blushing as people around them turn and stare. He ducks his head. “Yeah.”
When he looks up, the blonde is still gawking. She looks completely amazed. “Oh my god,” she says. “Holy fucking shit. I can’t- oh my god. Lou. Oh my god. You’re pregnant.”
“I am,” he agrees amusedly. “Eight and a half weeks.”
Perrie just stares. “Oh my god,” she says again. “I- Congratulations? You’re happy about it yeah?”
Louis bites his lip, “Well, happy now. And thanks.”
“You’re keeping it?”
“Most likely, yes,” he nods, biting his lip bashfully.
“I can’t believe this,” Perrie says, still sounding stunned. “Zayn knows?”
Louis nods. “I told him, my mom, and then my sisters last night. They cried.” He smiles fondly as he remembers the looks on their faces. Jay had set up the facetime and told them that Louis had something very important to tell them. He’s positive none of them saw this coming.
Either way, they were all lovely and sweet and amazing and Louis has never been more sure that he’s bringing a baby into the world who’ll have the most loyal and fiercely loving family in the entire world.
“Well, I’m honored you’re telling me,” Perrie says sincerely. She reaches out to clasp their hands together, squeezing lightly. “I love you Lou, and I’ll be here for you whenever you need me.”
Louis swallows back tears. “Thanks, Perrie, I love you too.” He’s never been more grateful that Perrie spontaneously decided to sign up to play piano for his studio. He’s never been more grateful that he somehow decided to approach her and strike up a conversation when he saw her reading a book he adored.
And he’s never been more grateful for how Perrie has always been an unconditional pillar of support and love for him whether they’re gossiping and laughing and getting manicures and doing face masks or if they’re laying in the dark whispering their secrets and wildest dreams to each other under the cover of the night when everything seems exposed and monumental.
As if reading his mind, Perrie grins. “I’m so glad I met you.”
“Me too,” Louis croaks, throat dry.
“And I can’t wait to meet your pup,” she adds. “I wonder if it’ll be a girl or boy? Maybe they’ll be a dancer like you.”
Or a hockey player like Harry… and Sam. He nearly blanches at the thought. Fuck his brain honestly. He brushes it away. “Maybe… Or they could be a singer in a band, who knows?”
“This is insane,” says Perrie. But she’s grinning widely and there’s genuine excitement in her voice as she continues on to wonder what Louis’ pup will be like. They spend the rest of lunch thinking about potential names and Perrie continues to assure him that she’ll be there every step of the way.
Yeah, she’s definitely getting godmother.
-
“Louis?” his doctor calls out and he nods, standing up to follow the beta to the examination room. He sits down on the chair, shifting uneasily.
“So, I hear you’re pregnant,” Dr. Jensen says, smiling. “Congratulations!”
“Thanks,” Louis says weakly.
“Are you here by yourself?” he asks kindly.
Louis grimaces. “Yes,” he breathes. He had thought about asking Zayn to come with him but the appointment clashed with the beta’s Ceramics class where he’d be having an assessment and Louis would never ask him to bail on that. So now he’s here alone.
He tries to ignore the alternate reality in his head where he’d be attending his first prenatal appointment in the company of his alpha and instead answers the doctor’s basic questions about his symptoms and struggles so far.
Louis goes through the typical physical examination, changing into the standard loose fitting robe for easier access. They also go through the process of an official urine test just to confirm once and for all that yes, Louis has been knocked up. When that test is finished, the doctor brings out the ultrasound kit. Louis’ heart starts racing, skin paling as he realizes this is it. This is the point of no going back. He lays back when prompted, sliding up the material for easier access.
He winces as cold gel is spread across his abdomen, Dr. Jensen sliding the metal transducer over his skin. Louis blinks. Right now, sound waves are being transmitted into his body and will reflect back as vibrations which will be recorded as electrical signals and translated into the familiar black and white pictures he’s seen before countless times on TV, in movies, or physically through the births of his siblings.
“Alright, Louis,” Dr. Jensen says. He gestures to a machine. “This is a fetal doppler, we’re going to check for the fetus’ heartbeat. Now, don’t be alarmed if you don’t hear anything. That’s possible when it’s this early. Your baby’s at nine weeks, so they’re about 0.9 inches long and weigh around 0.7 ounces- that’s about the size of a cherry.”
Louis stares down at his stomach - there’s the slightest bit of pudge developing there. Louis spends a lot of time rubbing over it, marvelling at the extraordinary truth that he has a living thing growing in him.
Or what will become a living thing.
His pup is only a little cherry right now. He already read all of this already of course, but hearing it out loud when he’s soon going to be able to see it for himself is entirely different. And when a faint but steady heartbeat stutters to life, echoing through the room and seeping into Louis’ heart, the omega is helpless to the influx of messy tears. He’s full on sobbing in seconds.
He’s heard stories about how thrilling it is to hear, but never in his life did he think it’d hit him this hard. That’s his baby. That’s his little girl or boy (or whoever they grow up to become) in his stomach. One day he’ll hold them in his arms.
And until then he’ll keep them as safe as he can. He’ll protect them and take care of them with everything he has. Always. He cries harder when the doctor hands him the ultrasound picture. He’s been crying so much in the past week.
His baby looks like a blob more than a human as it’s only an embryo but the barest hints of human potential are showing. That’s his baby, he thinks again dazedly. He created that baby.
He created that baby with an alpha that he barely knows.
And then he’s crying even harder, and this time it’s not fully happy.
He’s honestly quite embarrassed as he wipes his face and thanks the doctor. He knows he’s probably dealt with much worse than emotional omegas in their first ultrasound, but he feels awkward all the same.
Thankfully, the man reassures him, handing him a few brochures and packets of helpful information along with a couple other copies of the pictures. One for Louis, one for his mom… and one for Harry.
If he wanted it.
See, now that Louis has officially attended his first appointment, as well scheduled his next one for four weeks from now (he’ll have monthly appointments until the 7 month mark in which it advances to every other week), he has no excuse. He has to tell Harry.
And to prevent himself from chickening out, he gets into the car (which is actually Zayn’s car because Louis despises driving- the motivation of his first ultrasound was the only thing that got him behind the wheel that morning), straps in, glances at the ultrasound picture laying on the passenger seat, and takes a deep breath. Then he drives, setting course for Harry’s frat house.
He’s going to tell him now.
-
An alpha who introduces himself as Liam Payne opens the door for him and Louis smiles at him, hoping it doesn’t come across as strained. He keeps the ultrasound pictures behind his back as he climbs the stairs. He walks with his head held high, trying to swallow down the sudden influx of nerves forming inside him. He’s so close to talking to Harry again- for the first time in over two months. He’s going to have to look up into those green eyes and tell him that’s pregnant with their pup. Shit.
Part of him just wants to turn around and flee but he can’t be a coward. Harry at least deserves to know. Louis hopes he won’t be mad.
He’s close to hyperventilating when he reaches the familiar door. Harry Styles stares back at him on a wooden plaque. All of it is so familiar. This building, the hallway, the door, Harry’s room…
Louis inhales deeply. Now or never, he supposes.
He raises a fist and knocks on the door, wincing when the thumps come out more timid than he intended. However, a deep voice calls out, “Come in! Unless you’re Peter, in which case fuck off!”
Louis shudders, feeling weak at the sound of Harry’s voice. Deep and slow and calming. He slowly pushes the door and steps inside, heart pounding. Vanilla and pine instantly overtakes him and he breathes in the calming scent, aching slightly because he had forgotten how overwhelming and good it was. His eyes are drawn to Harry like a magnet.
He’s shirtless, fuck. Broad back and muscles on display as he stares at his laptop, completely concentrated on whatever he’s doing, probably homework. Louis hasn’t been noticed yet. He gulps. Harry has fucked him on that desk- early into his rut while burying his face into Louis’ neck and biting dangerously close to his mating spot.
“What’s-” Harry spins around and goes rigid, mouth falling slack. His nostrils flare and Louis momentarily wonders if Harry has missed his scent too. “Lou- Louis?”
Louis blushes, feeling out of place. For a moment, there’s complete silence as Harry gapes at him. He clears his throat and cracks it, “I need to talk to you.”
The alpha blinks, still looking stunned and confused. Louis feels like he’s going to throw up.
“What is it?” the alpha asks uneasily.
Louis swallows. “I… I’m pregnant.” At least he’s said it now.
Harry blinks, then blinks again. “What?” he says finally, confusion oozing from his voice.
“I’m pregnant,” he repeats, squeezing his eyes shut. He cannot cry. He won’t cry.
“Who…?” Harry questions, sounding a little bit panicked.
Louis resists the urge to smack him upside the head. Why else would he be here if it wasn’t Harry’s? “Yours,” he clarifies. “It’s yours.”
He watches the realization settle in the alpha. His eyes widen and his mouth drops further. “How?” he asks, standing up. He sounds distressed and Louis feels so guilty. It’s not like it’s his fault, he knows that, but this- this is life-changing.
“I don’t know. I never stopped taking birth control I promise, guess they weren’t lying when they said 99% effective,” he says uneasily.
“I… how long have you known?” he asks wildly, close to accusatory. He grabs a shirt and slips it on, staring at Louis with a grim expression. He’s frowning. He’s upset. Louis’ omega shies away, feeling guilty even though, again, it isn’t his fault.
“I took a few tests last week and the first prenatal visit was this morning,” he says defensively, fidgeting a bit. He holds up the paper which is folded, hiding the picture. “I have ultrasound pictures if you don’t believe me.”
Harry grimaces when Louis hands him the paper. Their hands don’t brush. It’s incredibly awkward and stiff but Louis already expected that. They barely know each other and they're definitely not friends. Harry opens the paper and just, stares.
“I’m at 9 weeks,” Louis offers. He curls a protective hand over his small pudge but Harry catches the movement. He gawks, eyes fixed on his stomach. Louis fidgets. “I’m keeping it,” he says.
“What?” Harry asks, eyes wide.
“The baby. I’m keeping it,” he says firmly. “I don’t expect you to be involved if you don’t want to since this was completely unexpected, but…” He falters. There’s so much tension between them. Harry’s only standing five feet away but it feels like they’re miles apart. “I just wanted to tell you.”
“Hang on a second,” says Harry, sitting down on the bed. He stares at the ultrasound again and Louis watches his Adam's apple bob nervously. He runs a hand through his curls and Louis’ heart pangs. He never knew yearning could hurt this bad. “I… I need to process this.”
“I understand,” says Louis shyly. “You can keep that copy, I got an extra for you… Um, don’t feel obligated to do anything.” It’s the opposite of what he wants. He can’t do this alone, but he doesn’t want to force Harry into it. Not when Harry isn’t looking for more commitments and is already so focused on hockey and studies. And of course, he doesn’t really know Louis- has no reason to want to help him.
“What?” Harry asks, looking alarmed. He meets Louis’ unsure gaze and his eyes widen. “I’m not… I’m not going to ignore this, Louis, I promise… I just need to think.”
Louis nods mutely.
“I’m not, like, abandoning you,” Harry elaborates. He’s gazing at Louis with desperation in his eyes. “This was a two person mistake, I know that. I’ll take responsibility and -”
“Don’t call it a mistake,” Louis interrupts before wincing. At Harry’s stunned expression, he continues softly. “I know it was technically unplanned, but I’m keeping it now. This is our pup you’re talking about.”
“No, I know, that’s not what I meant,” Harry says hastily. “I meant-”
“You didn’t want this,” Louis finishes flatly.
“No -”
“Don’t feel bad, Harry. This was all completely out of nowhere. We're young and busy and you've got other things to worry about. I understand, truly,” Louis says, sniffling a little bit. He feels close to tears which is both a complete overreaction on his part and also very embarrassing. “Okay, you can think about it and call me when you make a decision or whatever. I’ll do co-parenting with you if that’s what you want,” he continues hurriedly, eager to get out as soon as possible.
He glances over his shoulder where Harry is gazing at him forlornly. “Sorry,” he whispers, tears falling now. He’s so embarrassed. “You have my number, you can call me,” he says. Then he bolts.
Long strides out the door and down the hallway. He bumps into an unknown alpha and murmurs a quick apology before breaking out into a half-run. He’s crying quietly, little whimpers and sniffles as he bursts out of the frat building and rushes to the car. He takes a second to calm down, hand clutching the door handle harshly.
He did it. He told Harry. Over the past nine weeks, he’s forgotten some significant details. Like the breadth of Harry’s shoulders. His exact scent. His intense eyes. The way he says his name.
Fuck, and experiencing them now hurts for some reason. Louis can’t help but wonder if things were different- if Louis hadn’t been emotionally unavailable and Harry hadn’t made a promise to focus only on hockey during the school year. If they maybe got to know each other first instead of falling into bed together. He grips the steering wheel, trembling. He calms down slowly, taking in huge gulps of air and almost choking with how distressed he feels.
When his breathing balances out a bit more, he pushes up his sweater and studies his little pudge. There’s a baby in there, he reminds himself. A baby who’ll need him in seven months. And Louis’ going to have to take care of him. He’ll have help from his friends but it’ll be him ultimately who has to step up and mother his child.
He won’t let them down. Even if it means having to navigate a partnership with an alpha he doesn’t know and doesn’t love while the alpha he does love is completely oblivious.
-
“Mara, better posture, darling. Straighten up!” Madame reprimands. Louis bites back a smug smile as the omega scowls and adjusts her posture.
“Alright, from the top!” He moved into third position before zoning back into the music and allowing his body to move on instinct, performing a ballotte, moving back in a glissade en arriére and directly into spins. It’s a bit of a follow-the-leader improv game. Tilly, who’s in front, leads and the rest of the dancers follow, aiming to be completely in sync despite not having any idea what Tilly will choose to do next. It’s difficult and though Louis keeps up well enough, he still gets off beat when they go into jettes.
“Pay more attention!” Madame chides, shooting Louis a look. His face remains impassive but internally, he’s embarrassed. He can’t concentrate. It’s been four days since he’s broken the news to Harry and the alpha hasn’t contacted him yet.
The paranoid part of Louis fears he won’t contact him at all.
But he can’t worry about that now. He’s supposed to be dancing. This is his safe space. They end the class with a routine from the day before which Louis has pretty much mastered, much to his relief. Unfortunately, Madame calls him up immediately after class to reprimand him more blatantly for not paying enough attention.
“Louis, I heard you’re expecting,” she says and Louis blushes, his hand automatically coming up to cradle his mini bump. It’s not fully visible under his white practice leotard but there is a noticeable curve where there hadn’t been one before. Mara already made a comment on how he’s gained weight. “I understand that things are going to be difficult for you but if you want to continue classes, you must keep up,” she continues. “I don’t mean overwork yourself, you got my email on considering cutting back a day right?”
He nods. “I probably will,” he admits. He doesn’t want to but it’s the smart option.
“Good. Now remember, if you can’t handle it now, you’re always free to take an extended absence from the studio, we’ll understand. And we’ll welcome you back easily whenever you return,” she says kindly.
Louis sighs. “I don’t want to stop until I physically have to,” he explains. And he will physically have to sooner than he’d like- his feet are already beginning to swell after more grueling practices and it’s annoying as fuck.
Madame smiles sympathetically. “I know you don’t, and I don’t want you to either- you’re an incredible dancer and we’ll miss you for the Nutcracker, but I also don’t want one of my best dancers so emotionally scarred from dancing while knocked up that he doesn’t come back all together. Your health comes first.”
“I know, you’re right,” Louis says. “I’ll pay more attention next time, I promise.” He’s already bummed about missing the annual Nutcracker performance which people are beginning to audition for later this week, but he refuses to completely back out of sessions until he can’t anymore.
“Good,” she says before softening. “Take care, darling, okay?”
He nods, smiling gratefully, before slowing backing away and making a beeline for Perrie who’s packing up her music sheets and homework, humming a Beyonce song to herself.
“Thirty weeks of this,” he says glumly, taking a seat on the piano bench.
Perrie gives him a pitying look, patting his shoulder. “I’m sorry, babe.”
“It’s alright,” says Louis easily. He messes around with the keys, playing a half-formed melody in his head. He’s played piano since he was 11 but he doesn’t really get the chance to play that often. “My feet just hurt.”
“Drink more water,” Perrie says. “And I’ll send you an article I saw on exercises to reduce swelling when that picks up.” Louis groans but he’s truly grateful.
“You’re the best, Per,” he says just in case she doesn’t know. The smile she flashes confirms that she does.
They settle in a comfortable silence as Louis zones out, but Perrie breaks it carefully. “Has he gotten back to you yet?” she asks. She’s been filled in along with Zayn on his development with informing Harry.
“Nope,” he says, trying to hide his insecurities. “I can’t blame him. If I was in his place and my ex-hook up showed up with a baby out of nowhere, I’d be having a hard time dealing with it too.” He ducks his head.
Perrie grimaces. “Does… he know?”
Louis laughs bitterly. “I haven’t seen him since October,” he says, not bothering to hide his irritation. “Besides, it’s not like he cares…” He ducks his head shyly, the next words flowing out bitterly, “Especially with his new girlfriend.”
Perrie sucks in a breath. “He’s…”
“I don’t know for sure, but he was sucking some omega’s face off at that frat party a few weeks ago,” says Louis, trying to come off as casual. “I walked past them.”
The look Perrie gives him is horrified.
“I’m okay,” Louis says quickly. But she still looks pitying and Louis can’t have that.
“It’s not his fault he’s moved on so quickly,” says Louis, feigning nonchalance. “It’s… whatever. I have other stuff to worry about now anyway.”
The beta is quiet for a minute, but she pulls Louis into a hug which he returns easily. “I’m sorry,” she says. “I’m sorry you’re having to deal with all of this.”
“It’ll be worth it in the end,” Louis says convincingly. He smiles at his stomach. “I may have lost one love of my life but I know I’m gaining another.”
“You sap,” Perrie says, but she seems just as affected.
-
“You’re pregnant!” Niall shouts, eyes impossible wide.
Louis cringes, slouching more in his seat. People around them turn around and stare. He blushes in embarrassment. “Niall, lower your voice.”
They’re in a lecture. One pro of Niall also being an English major means there’s always a small chance they’ll be in a lecture together for the semester. They happened to luck out this semester in specific.
Louis had decided that morning that he was sick of setting up elaborate meetings and breaking the news and just casually mentioned it to the beta right as the bell rang.
“What the fuck,” Niall says, completely disregarding Louis’ plea to be quiet.
He huffs. “We’ll talk about this more later, pay attention!”
Niall is still staring at him so Louis reaches out and tilts his head so he’s facing front to where the prof has already started droning on about the current unit. “But-” he tries but Louis clamps a hand over his mouth.
“Shh,” he says. “After class.”
Niall licks his hand and he retracts it with a look of disgust.
“Ew,” he says, completely grossed out. He makes a show of wiping his palm on the chair rest and Niall sticks his tongue out at him.
“It’s Sam’s?” he asks, sobering up.
Louis grimaces. He hates that the initial guess for paternal identity when breaking the news will always be his ex-boyfriend. “No, it's not.”
Niall’s eyebrows furrow before he freezes, mouth agape. “Is it Harry’s?”
He flinches despite himself, and then nods slowly.
“Oh my god,” Niall breathes, sounding utterly mind blown.
“Quite a situation I’ve found myself in,” Louis jokes. It falls flat.
The beta bites his lip. “It makes sense now,” he says after a moment.
“What makes sense?”
“Why Harry was so concerned. I bet his alpha sensed it,” Niall says thoughtfully. “He was really worried a couple of weeks ago, kept badgering me to see if you’re okay. It’s like he had a feeling something was up.”
Louis blinks, trying to ignore the cluster of feelings Niall’s revelation has invoked. “That’s… a fair point. There’s a lot of research about alphas being able to sense when their omega is having their pup, but… it’s usually only for mated couples and Harry and I are definitely not mated.”
“Yeah, you guys barely know each other,” says Niall obliviously.
Louis flinches again.
Niall blanches. “That’s not- I didn’t… I’m sorry, that was not a good thing to say.” He looks ashamed.
“It’s okay,” Louis says after a moment, hunching into himself. “You’re right.”
“But-”
A loud cleared throat interrupts their conversation and the two of them turn to the front of their room where the prof is glaring at them with crossed arms. “Done socializing?” he asks, irritation very evident.
They mutter apologies and Louis stays quiet for the rest of the lecture, doing his best to focus but inevitably being distracted by a number of things floating around his head. Most of which is Harry. It infuriates him that he can’t stop thinking about the alpha even though he knows it won’t result in anything. All it’ll do is make him even more heartbroken than he already is. In effort to make it less bad, he focuses on Harry and what he’ll decide. He hasn’t gotten back to Louis yet and it’s been five days. It’s Thursday and Louis is getting even more worried with every passing hour.
What if he takes it back? What if he really does abandon Louis and doesn’t want anything to do with the baby.
His inner turmoil may have been good for something because as soon as he’s out of his lecture, he checks his phone and sees a text notification from Harry. He allows Niall to walk on ahead (promising they’ll continue the conversation later) before opening his phone to read the message.
Hey Louis, I talked to my parents and thought about it and I decided I’ll co-parent with you. I want to meet up so we can talk more.
Louis breathes out a sigh of relief.
Also if you’d tell me when your next appointment is so I can go with you?
He sucks in a breath, feeling a mixture of relieved and unjustifiably excited that Harry wants to be involved enough to attend appointments with him.
It’s December 1st, I’ll send you the address later. When should we meet?
It seems so stiff and awkward but Louis has to persevere and deal with it.
Tomorrow @ frat? Are you free at 9?
Sounds good.
He gets the read tag a moment later and sighs.
-
Louis knocks on the door, wiping his other sweaty hand on his jeans. He dressed up in his favorite light-wash mom jeans and a big jumper to hide his little bump. He’s paranoid- he knows. No one would be able to notice that he’s expecting when it’s still so early, but he doesn’t want to advertise it so better safe, than sorry.
A random alpha opens the door- a frat brother Louis hasn’t met. He doesn’t blink an eye before moving aside for Louis to enter and leaving.
He climbs the stairs silently, trying to tamp down the burst of nerves and nausea in his gut which is just great because Louis already puked today. Morning sickness is coming and going, leaving Louis dizzy and sickly throughout most of the week. The cravings are starting to grow too - this morning he had his cinnamon toast crunch with peanut butter.
Louis doesn’t even like peanut butter, but peanut butter cinnamon toast crunch is apparently what his pup wants and what his pup wants, they’ll get.
Harry’s door is ajar when he approaches and with a quick glance into the room, it becomes evident that Harry is pacing anxiously. Louis takes a deep breath, pulling his sleeves down over his hands in sweater paws, before gingerly stepping inside. Harry senses him immediately, coming to an abrupt halt and staring at Louis.
His eyes drop to Louis’ stomach and Louis blushes, shuffling fully into the room. “Hey,” he says cautiously.
“Hi,” Harry says, before they both fall silent. The permeating tension in the room becomes increasingly palpable. Louis takes a seat on Harry’s chair and the alpha sits on his bed.
“So you’ve made a decision,” Louis prompts, not wanting to waste any more time since he's spent the whole day wondering and trying not to get his hopes up.
Harry nods. “I’ll take weekends if you’re okay with that,” he says. “I’d do half and half but I don’t think you’ll mind having more time.”
“Definitely not, yeah. It sounds good to me,” Louis says quietly. Another awkward pause. He clears his throat, “So what are you thinking?”
Harry ducks his head. “I don’t know really, this is just kind of strange.”
Louis’ insides twist, feeling a mixture of embarrassed and hurt. “Yeah, imagine carrying the baby,” he jokes.
Harry’s head snaps up, looking guilty. “I…”
“No, no, I didn’t mean that as an accusation,” Louis says hurriedly. “I’m not… complaining.”
Harry nods. “Um.. How’s it going anyway? Are there any symptoms?”
He grimaces. “Morning sickness is a bitch,” he says weakly and Harry winces in sympathy. “I guess I’ve been getting cravings too. And I’m sure my roommate Zayn would tell you I’m more emotional than usual.”
Harry smiles a little at that. “I’ve been doing some research,” he says and a rush of warmth overtakes Louis. Harry’s been doing research? He wants to learn about what Louis is going through? Another voice in his head points out that of course Harry wants to know- it’s his kid too. It’s got nothing to do with Louis. “There’s a ton of diets and information about vitamins you should take and things to focus on that I’ve compiled if you want me to send you that.”
Louis already knows quite a bit about those things and he even purchased prenatal vitamins the other day but he just nods, pleased that Harry made a list for him.
“Okay good,” says Harry. “And obviously, I’ll be there for the next appointment. December 1st, right?” Louis nods. “I can pick you up and drive you if you want.”
“Please,” Louis blurts before blushing in embarrassment. Harry looks a little startled but then he chuckles.
“Right, you hate driving,” he says amusedly.
Louis makes a face, heart racing.
“I told my parents too and they’ve been completely supportive,” continues Harry. “I mean- they’re not happy about it of course, but they understand the situation and have been really accommodating about it. They want to meet you though.”
His heart stutters. “Oh… yeah of course. Definitely. You should probably meet my mom and stepdad too.”
Harry nods. “We’ll figure something out for Winter Break, does that sound good?”
“Yeah,” Louis says, feeling faint. He’s going to meet Harry’s parents- not as his boyfriend/omega, but as his baby mama.
“Okay…” Harry says awkwardly. There’s a pause before Harry hesitantly continues, “I know this is kind of an awkward situation but I want you to know Louis, that I was to be as involved as I possibly can. If you need anything from me, I’ll do my best to get it for you and be there for you. Always feel free to contact me.”
Louis relaxes a little bit. They’re on the same team, he reminds himself. “Thanks Harry, I appreciate that,” he says genuinely. “I was thinking… do you want to know the sex as soon as possible or do you want to wait?”
Harry bites his lip, considering. “I think I want to know… I’m too impatient to wait.”
“Me too,” Louis agrees, slightly relieved. Technically if he hadn’t wanted to know, Louis could still probably ask for himself and not tell the alpha but he’d feel weird knowing the sex of their baby while Harry was oblivious. But they’re on the same page – ironically, in every single way but the most important one. “That’ll be in January I think.”
“When’s your due date?” Harry asks curiously.
“June 5th,” Louis says. They estimated the date of conception as August 30th (aka the last day of Harry’s rut) and 280 days from August 30th is June 5th. A summer baby.
In fact, Louis will have graduated by then. As will Harry.
And next year they’ll be doing different things. Harry will probably end up drafted into the NHL and Louis will probably get a job in freelance or publishing like he’s been wanting. Staying close to his family is an easy decision for him, but he doesn’t know about Harry.
Actually, the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes he and Harry really will have to get this right. They’ll have to communicate easily and work out a system for switching custody. Louis already knew this but it’s now beginning to fully process. The only way this will work is if they work together as partners and friends.
Harry is watching him curiously. “Everything alright?”
“Yeah… just worried about school work and stuff,” he fibs. It’s not a total lie- he is worried about that.
“Have you told your professors yet?” asks Harry.
“Yeah, I’ve emailed all of them and most of them have promised to send me recorded versions of the lectures so I can take notes and do assignments remotely which is good. And I’ve only got four classes this semester and three next semester so it hopefully won’t be too much work,” he says. He’s still stressed about it. “I’m worried about my thesis too. I’m going to have to finish it early since I’ll be out of commission for most of Spring.”
“I figured that would be the plan anyway. You seem like the type to finish stuff early,” says Harry with a half-smile. “But seriously, if you need anything over the next six months, please let me know. I’ll even help you write your thesis if you want.”
Harry? Helping with his thesis and spending long hours with him? His smile is a little strained. “Thanks H,” he says before wincing. Was the nickname too much?
If it was, Harry hides it well. “Have you thought about names yet?”
Louis shakes his head. “Probably not until we know the sex, I guess.”
Harry nods.
Sensing another awkward silence, Louis clears his throat. “How’s hockey been going? I heard you got captain.”
Harry blinks, startled. “Oh... yeah.” Neither of them mention how Harry spent most of the summer agonizing on whether he’d be elected or not and Louis constantly reassured him every time, swearing that Harry was the best guy for the job.
He was right.
“That’s… good,” Louis says. “Congrats.”
“Thanks,” Harry says, tone softening. He clears his throat. “Have you come to any games?”
“Oh... no, not really,” he says lamely.
“Oh,” Harry echoes.
Louis blinks. What was that? Why did Harry ask him that?
“How about ballet, how’s that going?” Harry asks hastily.
“Alright. I’m going to have to stop in less than a month,” he says sadly. “My feet are already swelling.” He winces, he definitely did not need to mention that. Thank god he didn’t mention how his nipples were feeling sensitive and he’s pretty sure he’ll be developing breasts any day now.
“That sucks,” Harry says sympathetically and he doesn’t sound disgusted so Louis forces himself to relax. It doesn’t matter what Harry thinks about him anyway, he tells himself. Except it definitely does.
Louis clears his throat. “There is another thing I wanted to talk to you about,” he adds nervously.
Harry waits, obviously curious.
He ducks his head, feeling a light blush form on his cheeks. “Um… well, pretty soon I’m going to be nesting soo…”
“You need some of my clothes?” Harry supplies.
Louis grimaces, nodding. “You’re the father so our pup will be more comforted by my and your scents.”
Harry nods, standing up and walking to the dresser. He digs out a myriad of things: a gray sweatshirt that says Muscle Machine (Louis internally scoffs), a black college one, a few random shirts, and then most interestingly: a hockey jersey. It’s green and white like their school colors and has “STYLES” and “28” printed on the back.
“I wear this one a lot so it’ll work well,” Harry explains when he notices Louis’ raised eyebrow. He hands the pile to Louis and Louis has to take a deep breath through his nostrils to avoid sighing at the sudden rush of Harry’s scent. “If you need more or want me to re-scent them, I will,” he adds. “Just let me know, okay?”
Louis nods slowly, fingers curled into the mess of fabric, already thinking of which pieces from his own wardrobe would join the pile for his nest. He glances down at them again, feeling a peculiar weight in his chest. There’s deep yearning inside him to bury his face in the clothes but thankfully, he has enough self-control to resist.
When he finally manages to rip his gaze away, Harry’s watching him with an unreadable expression. “Thank you,” he says sincerely.
Harry smiles at him softly. “No problem, Louis.”
Louis ducks his head to hide his blush. “Is there anything else we need to discuss?”
Harry runs a hand through his hair awkwardly. “I don’t think so…” Despite his response, he looks like he’s itching to say something.
“What?” Louis asks, intrigued.
Harry shakes his head. “It’s... nothing. Never mind.”
Louis nods slowly, confused. “Right, well, I have to go back and have dinner.”
“You haven’t eaten yet?” Harry asks, looking concerned.
“No, not yet,” Louis confirms. At Harry’s worried expression, he chuckles. “Relax, it’s okay. I’m going straight back and eating.”
Harry frowns. “We have leftovers downstairs. None of the boys would mind if you ate some.”
“Thanks, Harry, but I’ll be fine. I have to cook with my roommate anyway,” Louis says reassuringly. Harry’s still frowning, looking like he wants to protest. Louis is certain this is another side-effect of alphas when they’ve impregnated an omega- having the overwhelming urge to take care of them. His omega preens at the attention but Louis knows he can’t encourage it. “See you… soon,” he says uneasily.
Harry nods, pursing his lips and still looking pained.
Louis ignores it, standing up and walking to the door.
He’s just reached out for the doorknob when Harry calls out, halting him in place. “Wait!”
Even though Harry isn’t his alpha and he isn’t using his alpha voice, Louis still automatically obeys- stilling completely and letting his limbs lock in place. With a great amount of effort, Louis carefully turns around. Harry’s standing up now too, looking sheepish.
He clears his throat, eyes wandering down to Louis’ sweater, “Um… are you showing yet?”
Louis flushes, not expecting that question. “A little bit,” he reveals quietly.
A small expression of wonder passes over Harry’s face and then he’s blinking rapidly. “Can I…. I mean- is it okay if I-”
“You want to see?” Louis guesses, feeling a layer of tension settle around them.
Harry nods, eyes dark and intense.
Louis bites his lip, considering. Then he slowly approaches Harry, goosebumps running down his skin and heart pounding in his chest. Harry’s eyes don’t leave him- specifically, they don’t leave his stomach.
Deciding to just do it, Louis yanks up the hem of his sweater, exposing his small bump to the cool air of the room. Harry sucks in a breath, eyes widening. Louis lowers his vision to the barely-there curve as well, not wanting to watch Harry’s reaction.
“The doctor said it was the size of a cherry last week,” says Louis timidly. “But now it should be the size of a strawberry.” According to the websites he’s been looking at, his baby is now officially a fetus weighing about 0.14 ounces and somewhere around 1.2 inches long.
Harry exhales heavily. “Wow.”
Louis nods. Wow, indeed. He suddenly feels a desperate tug inside him to grab Harry’s dangling hand and press it to the skin of his tummy. Stupid pregnancy urges, he thinks.
They remain in that awkward position for a little longer, Harry staring at his stomach and tiny bump intensely and Louis switching between glancing at him and his bump and trying not to dwell on whether or not Harry’s awed by the phenomenon like he is.
“Right, well… I should go now,” Louis says after another minute. Harry doesn’t lift his gaze even when Louis tugs his sweater down again, choosing to nod slowly in acknowledgement. Louis clears his throat and Harry’s head snaps up, looking embarrassed.
“Sorry,” he mutters. “Uh, remember to call me? If you need anything at all, anything.”
Louis nods again, desperation to get out rising inside him. “I’ll do that, thanks,” he says. Harry looks like he wants to say something else but Louis just backs away hastily. “Bye, Harry. Good luck on your next game.”
“Thanks, you too,” Harry says before shaking his head endearingly. “I mean-”
“I got it,” Louis says with an unintentional grin. Harry smiles back at him and then Louis steps out of the room and closes the door.
He stands there for a minute, hands clutching at his pile of clothes and heart racing. His omega is whining at the loss of Harry’s familiar scent and he feels his previous exhaustion and fatigue return to him in waves. Even though he’s read about the impact of the alpha during pregnancies, nothing could have prepared him for this.
The safety and comfort he had felt. The way he couldn’t help but relax being surrounded by Harry’s scent no matter how little he’s been exposed to it in the past.
And the way that all of it disappeared immediately upon him shutting that door and now he’s back to the normal pregnant misery.
Brilliant.
-
He brushes off Zayn’s questions during dinner, focusing on eat his lasagna and also a banana smoothie because for some reason he’s really been craving bananas. When he asks, Louis informs him vaguely that Harry’s agreed to being involved and that he’s sure the alpha will live up to those promises. He had hidden the clothes in his room upon arriving so Zayn didn’t see and it was honestly torture knowing they were on his bed, easy for him to cuddle and smell and leech comfort from whenever he wanted.
So after dinner, he refuses Zayn’s invitation to watch a movie, claiming exhaustion which isn’t too far from the truth. Then he rushes into his bedroom, locking the door behind him.
The one aspect of pregnancies Louis has been very familiar with after his mother’s experiences, is nesting. The process of building a nest for your future pups to keep them safe and comfortable with the use of clothes, blankets, pillows, and most importantly: infused with the most consoling scents- the scents of a mom and dad.
He’s already begun the process of building his nest- thick blankets around the perimeter with pillows and more blankets piled methodologically on top of them. He’s already made use of his most comfortable sweaters and sweatshirts- wearing them to immerse them in his scent and then tucking them into the gaps in his nest.
But it’s definitely been missing something.
Something meaning the bundle of clothes he left on the foot of the bed, already suffocating the room with the smell of strong, pure alpha.
Louis takes a deep breath, inhaling the strong scent, and getting to work.
To say that Louis didn’t bury his face in Harry’s jersey for a few minutes to soothe his inner omega would be a gigantic lie. But Louis wouldn’t even feel ashamed to scream it from the rooftops at this point- his brain has gone all fuzzy and hazy and his omega is at ease surrounded by the smell of his alpha.
No.
Not his alpha, Louis corrects firmly.
An alpha. Just an alpha - it could be any alpha and Louis would still feel the same.
Definitely.
He clears his throat and then reluctantly spreads said jersey over a pillow- it’s one of the innermost ones, right by where Louis will ultimately curl around when he falls asleep. Then he continues with his routine: pick, smell, place, pick, smell, place, pick, smell, place.
It’s all based on instincts- skills he’s developed ever since he was five years old when he built his very first nest with his mother’s clothes and his favorite stuffed toys and allowed no one but her to enter.
All too soon, he runs out of clothes. He adjusts the arrangements a bit, eyebrows furrowed and nose crinkled in concentration. It has to be just right. No pillow too droopy, no blanket creased, no shirt or sweater misplaced.
It takes him another twenty minutes to settle on a layout and by then his eyelids are drooping and the intoxicating blend of his and Harry’s scents are seeping into his body and coursing through his veins creating pure solace.
He (very painstakingly) rips himself away from the bed to go brush his teeth and go through his skin routine- he’s eager to see if he’ll gain the classic 'pregnancy glow' that all expecting mothers seem to get but that doesn’t mean he’s going to abandon his current regime.
And then he changes into sleep shorts and an old shirt that may or may not be one of Sam’s (the scent is long gone but Louis is still woefully attached), switches off the light, and then crawls back into his nest, careful not to disrupt his hard work and labor.
He sighs softly, curling into himself drowsily. For once, he isn’t going to bed with a busy mind. Every worry, concern, and fleeting thought has fled his brain and all he can focus on now is savoring the aroma of pine and vanilla and safety and alpha.
His eyes flutter shut slowly and then he succumbs to sleep.
For once he doesn’t dream of the past.
-
“Look at this one- it’s cute!” Perrie exclaims excitedly. She gestures to a pair of light-wash jeans that definitely resemble a good percentage of Louis’ closet.
Louis grimaces, eyeing the navy blue elastic strip. “Yeah…”
Perrie rolls her eyes. “You do realize you’re going to have to get used to stretchy pants.”
He winces. “Yeah I know. Give me a break, I’m mourning my fantastic figure.”
She shoots him an amused glance before holding it up again. “Yes or no?”
He bites his lip. “Fine, yes… I suppose I actually have to buy something today.”
“No kidding,” Perrie says. “You’re getting bigger by the day.”
He glances down at his stomach which is concealed by a sweatshirt, but he knows underneath is a larger bump than it was the morning before and that’s absolutely crazy. “I’m just over 11 weeks so it’s normal for me to be growing faster.”
“What size is Baby now?”
“A lime,” Louis answers, unable to suppress the giddiness in his voice. “They’re 1.6 inches across and weigh 0.25 ounces.”
It’s the same exact information he told Harry the day before via text- true to his word, Harry’s been checking in on him. Whether it’s a short message asking him how he’s doing or a reminder to take vitamins, he’s actually been involved. In fact, they already agreed to meet up in a couple of days for lunch where Louis would return the clothes Harry lent him so the alpha can re-scent them and replace them with different clothes in the meantime.
Louis has never been so grateful.
“Bigger and bigger,” Perrie says with a marvelling smile. He returns it with a curve of his own lips.
“Yeah, I can’t believe it,” he says softly. He presses a gentle hand over his bump and smiles wider.
“Okay, enough fonding. We have a list of clothes to buy you,” Perrie says determinedly.
Louis sighs dramatically. “You know, my feet really hurt…”
Perrie shoots him a look and he trails off in a huff. “I’ll drag you along if I have to,” she threatens.
“Right, okay then,” Louis says dryly.
Despite his grumpiness, the shopping trip is a success… about as successful as it can be when Louis is still against the idea of having to wear maternity clothes. Perrie finds it hilarious that he’s been so in love with the idea of being pregnant with pups one day but now that he is, he keeps complaining.
“It’s not like I’m not happy,” Louis defends when they finally leave the complex, loaded with bags of maternity sweatpants, jeans, and some baggier sweaters and shirts (not that Louis needs any more of those). He places his hand back where it belongs on his stomach. “I’m really excited. It’s just that some of the extra stuff sucks.”
“Everything worth doing sucks sometimes,” Perrie says.
Louis narrows his eyes. “If you say-”
“Even sex,” Perrie continues with a grin. Louis rolls his eyes. Typical. “Speaking of sex… how’s Harry?”
Louis sputters. “How do those two things have any correlation?” he asks, cheeks burning.
Perrie directs a pointed look to his stomach. Touche. “He’s fine,” Louis pouts. “He’s been texting me every day to check in with me and the baby which is honestly really sweet. And I’m seeing him in a couple of days so he can give me new clothes."
“New clothes?”
Louis blushes. “For my nest.”
Perrie raises an eyebrow. “Ahh.”
“Don’t look at me like that,” he complains. “I barely know the guy.”
“That didn’t stop you the first time,” Perrie says teasingly. Louis rolls his eyes. “Plus, you’re going to have to get to know him pretty well considering he’s the father of your pup. You have to trust his abilities to raise a kid and your ideals, goals, and wishes for how that’s going to happen are going to have to match up.” She pauses, taking in Louis’ tensed posture. “Lou?”
Louis exhales harshly, mind racing with the implications of everything Perrie said. “I didn’t think about it as much as I should have.”
Perrie softens. “I’m not trying to worry you, babe, but this is kind of a big deal.”
“No, you’re absolutely right,” says Louis nervously. He swallows roughly, “I do have to make sure we’re on the same page.” Fuck, what if Harry has a completely different vision for how they’ll raise their pup? He barely knows anything about him.
What if Harry’s secretly a flat-earther or something?
That one seems like a bit of a stretch considering Louis has seen how well-read he is, but the possibility is always there.
“Well, you guys should talk over it more when you see him,” Perrie says. “Don’t worry, Lou, it’ll be okay.”
He nods. It’ll be okay. He’s way out of his comfort zone and he has no idea what he’s doing, but it’ll be okay.
-
Harry and he decided to meet up at a small cafe on campus because Harry has practice afterwards and it’s more convenient for him.
He’s waiting at a table for two along with their food outside when Louis arrives, having ordered for both of them already after texting Louis about what he wants.
“Hey,” Louis greets cautiously.
Harry smiles warmly at him. “Hey, Louis.” He immediately gets up and pulls out the chair which Louis smiles at, ducking his head to hide the small blush that rises on his cheeks.
“What a gentleman,” he says jokingly, sliding into the seat.
Harry shrugs. “I try.”
Louis’ smile goes a bit strained after he realizes that this- and their short exchange- feels like they’re on a first date. And though his omega isn’t too mad about it, the reality is still a lot more complicated.
“I brought more clothes,” Harry says, gesturing to a small duffel that looks like it’s stuffed full. A wave of eagerness floods through him as his omega gets excited at the thought of being able to improve his nest and surround himself with Harry’s scent.
“Thank you,” says Louis, face warming as he tries to hide his thoughts.
Harry nods, brushing it off. “So, was there anything you wanted to talk about?” he asks.
Louis winces. How does he say I barely know you and it’s freaking me out because I’m planning on handing my child to you for two out of seven days of the week… without sounding paranoid and strange? “I just thought we should get to know each other better,” he says nonchalantly, shrugging a bit.
Harry raises an eyebrow. “Okay… what do you want to know?”
“Do you believe the earth is round?” Louis starts, far past fear of embarrassing himself at this point. This is his future kid’s life they’re talking about.
Harry blinks. “Sorry… what?”
“Are you a flat-earther?” Louis asks bluntly.
The alpha stares at him, mouth dropping open in a little bit of shock. “Um, no.”
Louis nods, internally relieved he didn’t sleep with someone who denies science multiple times. “Okay, good.”
Harry blinks again. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, it’s just…” he hesitates. “I just feel like I don’t know you that well and I need to if I’m going to trust you with co-parenting. And I know you may think that’s hypocritical but-”
“No, I totally understand,” Harry assures, looking amused. He chuckles. “Do I give you flat-earther vibes?”
“Don’t say vibes,” says Louis, wrinkling his nose.
Harry stares at him, smirking. “Vibes.”
“Okay, so I’ll add ‘immature’ to the list,” Louis jokes. Harry grins at him. “What about hockey? Is that what you intend to pursue as a career?”
Harry nods, sobering. “Yeah, and as of now I have a pretty good shot of making the major leagues… If financial support is what you’re worried about, I assure you, that won’t be an issue. And I don’t intend to get drafted anywhere far away either, because that’d be even more difficult and I also don’t want to be too far from my family because I want them close. My dream would be to get drafted by the Capitals, but I don’t really get to decide who picks me, so… We’ll see.”
Louis tilts his head, endeared by Harry’s loyalty to his family and relieved at the news that he wouldn’t be moving a thousand miles away. He’s been terrified that Harry will end up being drafted into a Canadian team and abandon Louis and their pup to pursue his dream. The scariest part is that Louis would have let him do it without a second thought. Harry’s extremely talented and he’d never want to infringe on his future success or keep him from following his true potential. “Your team has been playing really well so far,” he offers.
“Yeah, I’d say so,” Harry agrees. “You should come to a game.” It comes out slightly unsure, like he isn’t quite certain if he should ask.
Louis hums his assent. “Sure,” he says, before he can properly think it through. Besides, Sam had never invited him to games. It feels so messed up looking back on it- hockey is one of the biggest parts of Sam’s life and he never tried to include Louis in it.
He frowns at the realization, missing Harry’s quieter but still enthusiastic, “Great.”
Louis decides he should probably start eating at some point so he takes a bite of his pasta salad. He never used to be a pasta salad person but apparently his pup is, so pasta salad he will eat.
Harry initiates the next question: “How’ve your classes been?”
“Umm, alright,” Louis says with a shrug. Their conversation progresses and they stick with more pleasant topics, allowing themselves to learn more about the other. They talk about classes, hockey, ballet, and music. Harry is just as nice and agreeable as Louis hoped he would be and as time went on, he felt himself relaxing a bit.
He still didn’t know Harry Styles, but he’s pretty sure he will soon.
They’re wrapping up lunch and beginning to stand up when Louis catches a familiar scent and goes rigid, panic rising in him.
Sam.
“Hey, Sam,” Harry says easily, completely oblivious to the tension Louis is emitting.
“Hey, Styles,” says that familiar voice. Louis carefully looks over, throat closing up as he sees Sam with that same omega from the party. She looks gorgeous and happy, hand in the crook of Sam’ arm. The alpha looks guilty when he meets Louis’ eyes. “Hey, Louis.”
Louis smiles sheepishly, muttering a greeting. Harry looks confused.
“Well, me and Lucy have to go,” Sam says abruptly and Louis exhales in relief, glad he won’t have to endure a conversation with his ex and Lucy. “See you at practice, Captain.”
“Bye, Sam, see you then,” Harry says, voice leaden with confusion. He’s frowning when Louis gathers the courage to look at him again, Sam and Lucy already gone. “Everything okay?”
He nods insistently. “Yeah, sorry. Just feeling a bit off…”
Harry raises an eyebrow, clearly not buying Louis’ bullshit. “Okay,” he says anyway.
Louis feels guilt bubble up inside him. He’s trying to improve the relationship between him and the father of his future child which means he shouldn’t be lying- it’d be hypocritical of him. “Actually… I guess I better tell you now. Sam’s my ex.”
Harry blinks, mouth dropping open. “What?”
His face burns in embarrassment. “I’m sorry I didn’t mention it sooner, god. I hope this isn’t a dealbreaker. I didn’t want to ruin anything for you and one of your teammates.”
“No… it’s…” Harry trails off, looking pale. “It’ll be fine,” he says eventually, but he sounds uncertain.
“Shit, I’m really sorry,” Louis says, covering his face in embarrassment and shame. Harry probably thinks he’s a terrible person now, sleeping with your ex’s teammates only two weeks after breaking up. “He doesn’t know about the baby yet either.”
“Hey, Louis, I’m not mad,” Harry insists. “I… I’ll probably have to talk to him and make sure it won’t affect anything but-”
“He’s clearly moved on so it probably won’t,” Louis interrupts, unable to keep the bitterness out of his voice. Harry frowns at him, looking sympathetic.
Louis ducks his head. He doesn’t want Harry’s pity.
“Well, thank you for telling me,” Harry murmurs gently.
Louis nods, before clearing his throat. “I just realized I have to pay you back,” he exclaims, eyes wide. He takes out his wallet only to still as Harry grabs his hand gently.
The point of contact nearly elicits a shiver but Louis tamps it down, chiding his inner omega for being so needy. “Don’t worry about it.”
Louis opens his mouth to argue but Harry’s firm shake of his head makes him give in. He nods, “Thank you.”
“It’s not that big of a deal,” Harry assures him, looking at him thoughtfully. “I hope we can become good friends, Louis.”
Something jerks in his chest at the statement but he ignores it. “Me too,” he murmurs, offering a smile.
Harry returns it, dimples flashing. The sight sends his heart racing again. He’s going to have to decide how he feels about being friends with Harry, and he’s going to have to do it soon.
-
When Louis met Sam, he had been attending another set of summer classes, high off the summer partying and events and high off Sam’s electric personality and neverending charm. They hit it off at a frat party, going on a date the day after and living out of each other’s pockets for the next month and a half. There wasn’t a day Louis didn’t visit Sam at his frat. Whether it was just laying around in his bed, watching a movie, hanging out with Sam’s friends, fucking, or just existing together, it was always perfect.
September was like a bucket of cold water dumped on their unsuspecting heads. Dates and hanging out became infrequent even though they still texted and distance grew between them. But both of them were still committed. Things got better… and then they got worse… and then they got better again.
It was back and forth and up and down over and over but never once did Louis think of giving up. Never once did he think Sam would give up.
But he had.
And Louis never saw it coming - it’s something that’s been eating away at him ever since. He should have done something, should have known. He replays their last conversation and winces, feeling the familiar insecurities rise inside him. If he had just been better than maybe…
He stops that thought, knowing it’s the exact kind of idea that got him here.
Here being where he lays in his nest, bundled up in Harry’s clothes. The nest for the most part has been scaring away any nightmares or late night inner turmoil crises, but tonight is an apparent exception. He feels like he’s on the verge of falling apart and there’s nothing he can think of to stop it except hoping that Harry’s scent will wash it away.
He sighs, nuzzling into the freshly scented jersey he’s laying on. Harry wore it during his game the night before and it was still almost completely immersed in his scent. Louis breathes it in unabashedly, letting the scent seep into his insides and ease the tension in his limbs. Despite his physical relaxation, flashes of Sam (his face, his smell, his smile, his laugh) whirl around his brain, making him groan.
His omega seems particularly annoyed, bristling at his focus on an alpha that isn’t the father to his pup. It’s strange but Zayn had told Louis that morning that Louis’ omega now sees Harry as his alpha since they’re having a pup together.
It hasn’t been a surprise that Zayn’s been doing some extra research about pregnancies since he’s always been supportive and thoughtful like that. In fact, Harry’s been doing the same: texting Louis randomly throughout the day with little tidbits he finds about advice for getting proper nutrients, information about Braxton-Hicks cramps, and a load of other stuff that Louis is simultaneously grateful for, but also often mortified.
They’ve also been texting about other random stuff, talking about their days and getting to know each other. It hasn’t been more than a couple of weeks since Louis and Harry had lunch but he already feels a lot more confident in trusting Harry with coparenting. Harry is smart and hardworking and dedicated and he’s also a good person, kind and respectful and holding the same ideals and standards and political/social beliefs that Louis does.
It’s very reassuring. Louis wants to raise their kid to be humble and self-aware and educated. And of course he wants them to be kind and open-minded and generous. He thinks Harry will encourage those characteristics as much as he will himself.
And today is December 1st, which means it’s his second doctor’s appointment. He grabs his phone, opening it to see an unsurprising reminder from Harry that he’ll be picking Louis up from his flat. Zayn had been curious when Louis told him, saying that he wanted to meet the acclaimed hockey player before they left.
For some reason, Louis feels a bit anxious about the introduction.
However, he doesn’t get much time to worry about it after another battle with morning sickness and the resulting hours of misery. He ends up dozing off after lunch in his nest, cuddling one of Harry’s sweaters and snuffling in his sleep.
Zayn rouses him at three so he can get ready. He puts on some sweatpants and a sweater, not concerned with looking nice considering he and Harry will be seeing a lot of each other, undoubtedly at inconvenient times.
He slides a beanie on his head right as a knock rings through the living room. Louis freezes, whirling around anxiously as Zayn strides to the door and opens it.
Harry’s dressed in a simple gray henley and black jeans, a black coat slung over his arm. He looks a bit confused, frowning at Zayn.
“Harry Styles,” Zayn drawls with an obvious edge to his tone.
Louis rolls his eyes and intervenes, shoving in beside Zayn. “Hey, Harry,” he says awkwardly. “I’m ready to go.”
“Uh…” Harry trails off, looking between them nervously.. “Are you Louis’ roommate?” he asks, directing the question to Zayn.
“Roommate and best friend,” says Zayn, with a bit of a threatening smile. “Nice to finally meet you, man.”
Harry blinks. “You too?” He sounds unsure about it.
“Right, great,” says Louis. “Bye, Zayn,” he chirps, before shoving past him and out into the hallway.
“Have fun,” Zayn says dryly. He shoots a stern look at Harry and Louis stifles a laugh. Zayn is the least intimidating person on the planet except for when it comes to being an overprotective best friend. Louis can relate, he’s the exact same way with Zayn’s partners, few and far as they are since the beta’s very cautious.
“Uh, nice to meet you again,” says Harry, waving awkwardly right as Zayn slams the door shut.
Louis chokes out a laugh, attempting to mask it as a cough but Harry catches it.
“Evil,” he mutters, but he’s grinning.
They head down to Harry’s car in which Louis realizes Harry drives a fucking range rover. He stops short. “What the hell?”
Harry shrugs sheepishly. “Sponsorship money?”
“The NCAA doesn’t allow sponsorship money,” Louis says, crossing his arms. “I may not pay attention to college sports but I’m not completely ignorant.”
“Okay fine… my parents got it for me,” Harry admits. He looks embarrassed.
“Harry… I’m not going to judge you for being well-off especially since you’re clearly ashamed of it,” Louis says gently, amused. “Having family money isn’t a bad thing as long as you’re not a dick about it and you acknowledge your privilege.”
Louis can’t deny his first thought immediately went to relief at the knowledge his pup will have a strong financial support system behind them. He feels simultaneously annoyed with himself and curious- is this the type of thing mothers feel or think about?
Harry sighs, “You’re right. And I definitely acknowledge I’m privileged. I’m a white male alpha athlete after all.”
“As long as you’re aware of it,” Louis teases.
-
“Ah, Mr. Tomlinson, good to see you back!” Dr. Jensen says. Louis stands up from his chair in the waiting room, nervously fiddling with his fingers. He absorbs the look of surprise on the beta’s face when Harry stands up with him.
“I’m Harry Styles. I’m the father,” Harry says, reaching out to shake hands.
Dr. Jensen smiles warmly. “Nice to meet you.” He turns to gesture. “Right this way.”
Louis enters the familiar office and takes a seat in the examination chair, catching Harry’s eye as the alpha sits in a nearby seat. He sends Louis a reassuring smile. Louis exhales.
“So you’re at 13 weeks officially! You’ve almost passed the first trimester, congratulations!” Dr. Jensen says. Louis blinks, taken aback.
He’s been tracking the days and weeks pretty well and he knows he’s over three months pregnant but he hasn’t had the time to process the information and what it meant… He’s nearly a third of the way through, a third of the way to being a mother.
“Is there going to be another ultrasound today?” Harry asks, sounding eager. He’s leaning forward in his seat, large hands braced on his knees as he focuses his attention on the doctor.
“Yes, there is,” Dr. Jensen says, smiling. He turns to Louis. “Have there been any complications in the past few weeks?”
Louis grimaces, knowing this is the part where he’ll have to discuss his symptoms in front of Harry, even the more… embarrassing ones. He keeps his eyes on the beta as he answers his questions, blushing when they get to his nipples.
“Yeah… they’ve been growing a bit,” Louis admits, completely mortified. He doesn’t look at Harry.
Thankfully they don’t linger on the topic for too long. Dr. Jensen asks about whether he’s started getting Braxton-Hicks and Louis admits he had his first bout the day before. It had been at lunch and he had been eating with Zayn in the kitchen, blissfully unexpecting before the first wave of cramps hit him like a bus.
It had been terrifying at first- the possibility that something went wrong and his pup was in danger, but Zayn soothed him and they went through the steps online for getting through them as painlessly as possible. Louis gulped down drink after drink of water, and then took a warm bath in which he focused on breathing.
The experience definitely hadn’t been pleasant but Louis was more upset by the confirmation that he’s now in the stage where he has to take his absence from the studio. Unpredictable menstrual or pre-heat cramps are already a bitch to deal with, but Braxton-Hicks are almost impossible to endure while dancing. Not to mention, his endurance is dropping bit by bit. He’s not as agile as he was a few days ago, let alone before he was pregnant.
Eventually, Dr. Jensen brings out the metal transducer and applies the familiar, uncomfortably cold gel over his stomach. Then he’s bringing out the ultrasound kit and using the fetal doppler. Harry quietly moves his chair beside Louis and takes his hand. He intertwines their fingers and squeezes.
Louis glances at him, surprised but grateful.
And then they’re staring at a blob on the screen- bigger and more prominent than what Louis saw last time. He feels the familiar tightness in his lungs as he exhales shakily, tears forming.
Harry looks awed, lips parted as he stares at the screen.
“Your pup is about three inches long now,” Dr. Jensen whispers.
“The size of a peach,” Harry murmurs, a distinctive heaviness in his voice.
Louis swallows, clinging to Harry’s fingers almost excruciatingly. That’s- that’s their pup. A little blob that’s only going to grow bigger and bigger. He can already see the head of the baby, making up almost half of its small size. The sight makes his eyes water.
Harry seems just as affected, lips pursed and eyes glimmering when Louis forces himself to glance at him and rip his gaze away from the screen. As if sensing he’s being studied, Harry looks up, eyes locking onto Louis’ in a searing stare. For a moment, they just look at each other, tears beginning to fall from Louis’ eyes but he doesn’t dare brush them away. Indescribable depths of emotion are mirrored in Harry’s eyes as they must be in Louis’. Harry offers him a small smile and Louis feels a shudder travel down his spine.
A surge of feeling arises in Louis’ chest- something incomprehensible, something unrelenting and overwhelming. Harry blinks heavily, eyes still fixed intensely on Louis’ face. He gently squeezes his hand again and Louis finally smiles back, lips curling almost shyly.
The rest of the appointment passes in a blur, the most significant information being that Dr. Jensen highly recommends that he and Harry make sure to see each other as much as possible for the remainder of the pregnancy so as to not endanger their pup. According to him, getting pregnant has created a strong soul bond between them, which means constant human contact is vital for them as individuals, not just for the pup.
Louis hadn’t been surprised and he’s sure Harry wasn’t either. Their intense connection even after weeks apart was a clear sign that they’re secondary genders have recognized each other as a future mate, hence the “soul bonding” to display that. The side effects are increased empathetic and physical understanding of each other as well as a strong impact over each other’s instincts for things such as comfort, safety, and much to Louis’ initial embarrassment, arousal.
He also recommended that they try to initiate some physical contact to make sure their soulbond doesn’t become threatening to either of their healths, especially as the pregnancy progressed. They were able to survive without each other for the first two months, but apparently they’d ‘gotten lucky’.
They listen to Dr. Jensen’s warnings before assuring him that they won’t have any issues in that regard.
Soon they’re back in the parking lot, walking slowly to Harry’s car. Neither of them say a word, lost in the haze of seeing their pup and knowing they’ll be a living, breathing human soon.
It’s like there’s a layer of acceptance and mutual understanding enveloping them. Louis feels a strange urge to reach over the center console to grab Harry’s hand and hold on, but that would be wildly inappropriate, so he keeps his hands in his lap and tries to change the subject.
“So what did you think?” Louis asks timidly when the silence becomes too restricting.
Harry glances at him out of the corner of his eye. “It was…” He trails off, looking thoughtful. “I didn’t think it would be so emotional,” he admits after a moment.
Louis nods. “I cried the first time and I thought I wouldn’t this time… but then I did.” He shrugs. “It’s just so crazy there’s someone growing inside me and soon they’ll come into the real world and I’ll be able to hold them.”
Harry bites his lip. “I don’t think I’ve said it Lou, but I think you’re so amazing for doing this.” He glances at Louis again, eyes wide. “Not for getting pregnant, obviously, but like… for balancing school and dance and having a baby… God, that’s so incredible. And having to carry our pup and endure stuff like morning sickness and Braxton Hicks- I can’t even imagine. But I’m grateful.”
Louis smiles softly, endeared by the honesty and appreciation in his words. “I appreciate it, Harry.”
The alpha smiles at him. “I feel like this would be the right time in a film for us to hug and we have to touch each other anyway, so…” He holds his arms out and Louis doesn’t hesitate to lean over the center console to lean into his embrace.
Harry is warm, body heat leeching onto Louis’ perpetually cold skin as he rubs his back gently. The close contact makes his omega purring, no doubt relieved to be close to its soul bonded other half.
He’s optimistic. None of this is going to be easy, he knows, but it could definitely be worse. Harry is a good alpha at the end of the day, and he’s already made Louis feel worlds more comfortable with the situation.
“Any cravings?” Harry asks, pulling away to put the car in drive.
Louis blushes, settling back into the seat. He bites his lip, meeting Harry’s eye. “Maybe… some mint chocolate chip ice cream?”
Harry laughs deeply, a grin splitting his face. “Ice cream it is,” he says.
Smiling wide himself, Louis puts a hand on his lower stomach and splays his fingers over the bump. He feels a rush of affection for Harry and for their pup, eagerly growing in his stomach.
What Baby wants, Baby gets.
-
A few days later, Louis is walking out of his Social Psychology lecture when he sees him across the pathway.
He sucks in a breath, frantically searching for an escape route but it’s too late. Sam spots him and makes his way over, an uneasy smile curving his lips. At least he’s not with her, he thinks. Sam and Lucy, the happy couple. Sam’s omega who he’s not afraid to bring to games and parties and introduce to his friends…
Sam stops a few feet away, hands raised slightly as if to show he means no harm. If only all warnings in their relationship were communicated so obviously.
He looks good, Louis notes bitterly. His blonde hair is soft and styled casually, eyes glinting and expressive as always, and he’s dressed in a college sweatshirt and jeans. He looks immaculate, handsome.
Not like Louis, who may be glowing according to Harry but who’s also sporting dark eyebags and messy, flattened hair because he can’t be bothered to brush it in the morning. He’s also pretty sure there’s a stain on his sweater and he’s pretty horrified about it.
“Hey, Louis,” Sam greets cautiously. He looks a bit nervous, like he’s afraid Louis is going to blow up at him. Louis swallows, tamping down the hurt.
“Hey, Sam,” he replies eventually, keeping his tone polite and unaffected. He glances down panickedly at his concealed bump, breathing out a sigh of relief when he realizes the curve isn’t too noticeable under his baggy sweater.
He has no idea what Sam wants. In fact, he’s convinced that he’d never want to speak to Louis again, which is why he’s shocked at his response.
“I was wondering if we could talk,” Sam says slowly. He fidgets with the material of his jumper, shoulders hunching in awkwardly. “I understand if you don’t want to but I think it would be a good idea.”
Louis blinks, taken aback. “Sure,” he blurts instantly, his yearning overpowering any attempts at thinking through his options and making a decision based on logic and ration.
He bites his lip, letting Sam guide him off the path to a nearby bench. He sits down cautiously, crossing his legs and sitting on his cold hands anxiously. Sam sits down a foot away, the distance between crackling with tension and unspoken words. A wave of sandalwood and coconut overtakes Louis and he switches to breathing through his mouth, unable to stomach it.
“What is it you wanted to talk about?” Louis asks, trying to keep his tone unaffected and most likely failing.
However, Sam doesn’t seem to notice. He sighs, “Look… I’ve been hearing some rumors and I guess I’m a bit… concerned.” He glances at Louis then, lips pursed into a frown.
Louis grimaces as Sam’s eyes drop obviously to his stomach. He rests a hand on his bump almost subconsciously, like an inadvertent instinct to protect his pup. “About me…” he starts.
“Being pregnant,” Sam finishes, looking uneasy.
“It’s true,” he admits, ducking his head.
Sam is silent for a moment, then, “It’s… It’s not mine, is it?”
Louis' head snaps up and he gapes, completely shocked. “No, of course not!” he exclaims, horrified. “I would have told you!”
He expects Sam to believe him but instead he frowns. “How far in are you?”
“I just passed the first trimester,” he says, confused then defensive. “It’s not yours.”
Sam looks unconvinced. “The timeline seems awfully close, s’all. I’m not trying to accuse you of anything but-“
“You always used a condom,” Louis interrupts, getting angry. This is not how he pictured his first genuine interaction with Sam after the break-up, and it hurts. It hurts that Sam doesn’t trust him enough to believe him instantly, despite them having dated for a year. Meanwhile, Harry accepted it immediately, even though he barely knew Louis or anything about his sex life. It hurts that Sam is looking at him with this skeptical frown, staring at Louis like he barely knows him.
He does know him, no matter how much he pretends like he doesn’t. And Louis knows him in return, knows his likes and dislikes and habits and fears and how to make him laugh, smile, cry, and groan. He wants to scream all of that out loud, to show Sam what he’s lost.
“Condoms break,” Sam points out. “And unless you forgot it once, apparently birth control doesn’t always work either.”
Louis shakes his head annoyedly. “Yeah, but those aren’t true for this situation. This isn’t your baby, I’m sure of it. According to the blood test I took at the beginning, conception happened over two weeks after we broke up,” he explains. “You don’t have to worry about being a parent.” The last part slips out bitterly and he can’t quite make himself regret it.
“Whose is it then?” Sam asks, and he has the actual nerve to look relieved. That specifically feels like a knife to the chest. Secretly, Louis had been dreaming of this moment for weeks. The moment when Sam inevitably found out he’s pregnant with a baby that isn’t his. His deepest wish is that Sam finding out would ignite some sort of jealousy and regret in him, driving him to plead to have Louis back.
And in this dream, Louis accepts him. They live happily ever after with their baby (and Harry, he supposes). All is right again.
But this dream isn’t reality. Because Sam doesn’t care. He doesn’t care- all he cares about is that he has no responsibility or obligation to a child he doesn’t want. It sends a rush of anger through Louis’ blood. “It’s none of your business,” he says coldly. “Nothing to do with me is any of your business now. You made sure of that.”
Sam flares his nostrils, looking ticked off. “Let’s not do this right now, Lou.”
Don’t call me that. “Fine, thanks for the ‘talk’, Sam. It was delightful, really,” he bites, standing up. “I can’t believe you have the nerve to come up to me and interrogate me about if the pup’s yours or not, then proceed to not believe me even though I’m the mother and I attended those doctor’s appointments and slept with an alpha thirteen weeks ago. I know better than anyone whose baby this is, you bastard.”
“I didn’t mean to offend you,” Sam protests, at least having the sense to appear guilty. “And I’m sorry for not believing you. I was just worried.”
Louis snorts. “Worried? You’re worried? You’re concerned? Is it stressful, Sam? Are you overwhelmed? What do you think I’ve felt these past few months? When you broke up with me out of nowhere and then got a new girlfriend within weeks. While you and Lucy were having a blast, my entire life has turned upside down,” he snaps, voice going wobbly. He sniffles, averting his gaze from Sam’s shocked and horrified face. “I’m going to go,” he whispers, holding back a small whimper.
Sam doesn’t stop him as he hurries away, face crumpling right away as he moves out of hearing distance.
-
Try as he might, Louis ends up spending the rest of his day in bed. He curls himself into his nest, dressed in one of Harry’s newly dropped off shirts since he can’t bring himself to wear any of Sam’s after their stilted conversation.
He cuddles another one of Harry’s shirts too, scenting it desperately and hoping the pine and vanilla pheromones will quell the aching in his heart. His omega is wailing, completely and utterly distressed.
It’s dangerous, is the thing. Incredibly dangerous for an unmated omega, especially an unmated pregnant omega, to fall victim to deafening levels of stress. It’s made worse by isolating yourself, but Louis can’t help it. He could scream for Zayn to come and cuddle him, but his throat feels swollen and dry. He’s physically incapable of getting up, shrinking in his nest until he’s wound into a small ball.
The real panic arrives when he realizes he’s trembling, little steady quivers that rack his entire body. He’s shivering too, despite being wrapped in dozens of clothes and blankets. He feels clammy and feverish, eyelashes clumping together from his tears and teeth chattering.
His omega is still weeping, incessant throbs of aching and longing crashing against his tattered heart. He doesn’t know how long it’s been- an hour? Two? Five?
Everything feels loose and blurry, like he’s blinking through a rose-tinted kaleidoscope. It feels like he’s simultaneously drunk and blood cold sober.
God, he can’t move.
Harry’s scent has faded to a ghost of what it was, a flimsy comfort against his cornered omega. His throat feels tight, lungs compressing and contracting in his chest as he struggles to breathe. More tears form in his eyes, falling like rain from his straining eyes.
Terror strikes through him. This is bad, he thinks fearfully. But he can’t do anything to stop it.
He needs an alpha. He needs his alpha.
It feels like weeks have passed when the door creaks open and a worried voice cuts through the thick, suffocating silence. “Lou?”
It’s Zayn. Not his alpha. His omega wails again and he shuts back down.
He’s somewhat aware of Zayn trying to talk to him, voice slowly raising from mildly concerned to overwhelmingly panicked. A hand squeezes his shoulder and then the door is swinging shut with a muted thud.
Louis lays entirely still, shivering excessively. Bile is rising in his throat, nausea and sorrow intermingling and banding together as they claw their way up his esophagus. His fingers go numb, pale and cold as he clings desperately to Harry’s clothes.
Alpha, he thinks dazedly. He needs his alpha.
A low thrum starts up in his mind, heightening with every passing second until his head is literally throbbing in pain. He lets out a tiny gasp, choking on his saliva which causes his whole body to jerk with the movement. The buzz grows louder and louder, overtaking everything else until Louis is left surrendered to its will. He feels himself slipping, body slackening and sliding into that dark place where omegas go on their worst, most vulnerable days.
And in this dark world, Louis is surrounded by his most profound fears- worse, he is his biggest fears. He never finds love. He’s a terrible mother. He’s hated by Sam. His family is disappointed in him. Niall and Zayn and Perrie abandon him.
Harry abandons him.
They all leave him, making his darkest secret come to light: he is alone.
His omega thrashes and keens, devastated. Louis stills in place, all feeling bleeding out from his weary limbs. He doesn’t just fall under, he tumbles over the edge into an endless free-fall.
-
For a while, all that exists in the world is a heart.
A heart that’s being gently traced and retraced over and over again. Drawn with tender fingers that caress soothingly and unyieldingly, engraving heart after heart into the sensitive skin of Louis’ stomach.
The rough but gentle pad of the finger is a stark contrast to his soft tummy, making the sensation feel like an anchor rather than an assault.
A barrage of alpha pheromones is the next thing that registers. Woodsy and sweet and safe.
Louis rouses slowly, eyes fluttering open only to squeeze shut at the bright light. He mewls quietly, nuzzling further into his pillow. It’s then that he realizes why he feels so warm and secure.
There’s two arms wrapped around him, tightly pulling him up against a firm chest and keeping him caged in protectively. Two large hands are underneath his shirt, one with fingers stretched impossibly wide against his upper chest so that the tips of the fingers are resting above his heartbeat.
The other hand is tracing the hearts around his belly button, movements languid and oh so careful. There’s a soft brush of lips pressed into his hair, a knee nudging the backs of his calves, and a leg slung over his thigh securely, bare skin against bare skin.
And he’s so warm.
Every point of contact between them burns with tenderness and comfort, intense and grounding and safe. Fuck, he’s never felt so safe.
The movements eventually stop, hand falling flat against Louis’ stomach as Harry lets out a soft sigh, falling back asleep.
Careful not to stir the alpha, Louis exhales heavily. He leans back into the embrace slowly, sighing in contentment. He shivers when the movement jostles Harry’s head so that he’s breathing into Louis’ neck, breath warm against his throat.
How did Harry get here?
The wisps of a memory tug at his mind.
“Lou, I called Harry,” Zayn had whispered, running a gentle hand over his fringe. Louis blinked at him slowly, his mind still woozy in between different waves of his omega-drop.
Harry crouched beside the bed looking frazzled and disheveled, dressed in worn gray sweatpants and a college shirt. The sudden rush of his familiar pheromones eased some of the weight contracting on his chest and Louis exhaled shakily. “Hey, baby,” Harry whispered, “Can I come into your nest?”
Louis’ omega whined at the thought, but he couldn’t pry his lips apart to acquiesce, couldn’t even gather the strength to nod his head.
A gentle hand had cradled his face then, warm and comforting as he thumbed over Louis’ cheekbone. “Darling,” he murmured, “I don’t want to get in if you don’t give me permission. I know how sacred nests are. And yours is so beautiful- I’d never want to come in and disturb all your hard work.” His voice was low and soft, simmering with an undercurrent of worry.
He tried his hardest, but he couldn’t respond. He felt himself slipping once again, watching Harry’s eyes widen in fear and the hesitation disappear. His other hand came up to cup the other side of Louis’ face, tilting his head up as it lolled back. Tendrils of sleep wrap around his body and tug.
“Okay, kitten, I’m getting in because you’re scaring me,” he said slowly, frowning as Louis’ blinks grow farther apart. “Don’t give in, Lou-baby. Not yet.” He used his alpha voice, but it was still oh so gentle and more sweet than forceful. Louis felt his body untense at the command.
Harry tugged off his shirt, leaving him in his sweatpants as he crawled into Louis’ nest. He moved cautiously, careful not to disrupt the walls of blankets and clothes Louis had built. Harry settled at Louis’ back, hands sliding down his sides reverently.
Louis’ omega keens, fighting against the urge to drop under again. However, it’s a losing battle and Louis once again finds himself slipping into that dark space.
Except this time, there’s a single light. Bright and steadfast, sealed with a featherlight kiss to the top of his head. It was at moments like that where Louis almost thought he could feel their bond, pulsing between them like an unbreakable thread that keeps them tied together through everything.
“Harry,” Louis breathed, so quiet that he was sure Harry hadn’t caught it.
Then, Louis assumes, he dropped again.
His eyes flutter shut, inner omega purring at the satisfaction of being in his nest with his alpha and pup, safe and sound.
He freezes, eyes flying open in shock. He-
Harry’s not his alpha, he thinks hysterically. His omega is just confused, blinded by its current bliss and feeling very connected with Harry who’s right next to him. Still, he shouldn’t be having thoughts like this, thoughts about having more.
He understands why of course. They’re soul bonded which means his omega feels a distinct link to Harry’s alpha and the truth that they’re having a pup together. Not to mention, he just brought Louis out of a drop, a feat that can only be achieved by an alpha who his inner omega trusts wholeheartedly.
His heart races as the words register in his mind. He does trust Harry wholeheartedly… but when did that happen?
They’ve been spending a lot of time together, yeah, and Louis’ omega has been attached to him since the beginning. But when did that friendly attraction and mutual understanding morph into trust.
His breathing goes shallow again, igniting another level of panic. He can’t be stressing over the implications of his subconscious reaction to Harry right now, not when his omega is still in such a vulnerable spot. So he forces himself to let those thoughts drift away, sinking back into Harry’s hold and letting his soft breaths lull him into that sleepy content state where he feels like a spider could crawl onto his hand and he wouldn’t scream.
Okay, maybe that’s an exaggeration, but he still feels entirely tranquil and soft.
He savors the feeling of being wrapped in the arms of an alpha. It’s been too long since he’s slept with someone else in his bed, and he hadn’t realized how much he’s been aching for it. Aching to be spooned and held and treasured.
Harry shifts slightly, snuffling in his sleep. His lips brush over Louis’ hair gently, making him shiver at the feeling. Louis gently uncurls his fingers from one of Harry’s sweaters, flexing them with a wince. He had been holding on so tightly and now his fingers feel sore.
Then he carefully slides one hand under his own shirt to rest on top of Harry’s larger one, letting out a jagged breath as he fits his fingers into the gaps of Harry’s.
He wonders if his heart pounding underneath Harry’s palm is what ultimately stirs the alpha awake, because the first thing Harry does is turn his hand over to grab Louis’ properly. He tugs their linked hands out from his shirt and holds them up near Louis’ face. Then he hooks his head over Louis’ shoulder and presses a soft kiss to the back of his hand.
Louis flushes, omega preening at the show of tenderness.
“Good morning,” Harry rasps, voice gritty and deep. It grazes Louis’ insides, smooth like honey. Harry’s other hand traces another heart around his belly button, before settling so his palm covers most of the bump, almost posessively.
“Morning,” Louis breathes, voice muted. He lets out a small sigh before turning over so they’re facing each other. He immediately buries his face in Harry’s neck, breathing in the pure scent of alpha that saved him last night.
Harry tightens his hold on him, releasing soothing pheromones and smoothing a hand over Louis’ head gently. He hums under his breath- the song sounds familiar but Louis can’t quite pinpoint what it is. He sneaks his hands up to Harry’s chest, fingers digging into his bare skin right near his swallow tattoos.
“When did you come over?” Louis whispers.
“One in the morning,” Harry says, breath tickling Louis’ temple. “Zayn called me and told me you dropped and I came as fast as I could.”
Despite his best efforts, tears still come to his eyes. Damn hormones, he thinks, sniffling. “Thank you,” he says, pressing his watery eyes to Harry’s shoulder embarrassedly. “I don’t know what would have happened if you didn’t show up.”
Harry squeezes him at that, sounding distressed when he says, “I don’t even want to think about it.”
Louis raises his head so he can meet Harry’s eyes, bright and hooded in the early morning. Even after just waking up, Harry looks beautiful. The slope of his nose, the angle of his jaw, the bow of his slightly parted lips- he’s devastatingly attractive. But it’s the little things that get to Louis the most. The stray curl falling onto his forehead, the faint dusting of facial hair above his upper lip, the small birthmark on his chin. They’re all perfect.
Harry is appraising him right back, eyes roaming over his face with an unreadable look on his face. Louis feels a bit self-conscious, knowing how prominent his eyebags are and how tousled his hair must look, but Harry’s seen him in a much more disheveled state so he doesn’t let the paranoia linger for too long.
“You’re beautiful,” Harry whispers then, as if he’s somehow read Louis’ mind. He blushes deeply, ducking his head. Harry presses another kiss to his hair and then slides down to press a kiss over his clothed bump and Louis blushes harder.
He appreciates the alpha’s attempt to ease the remnants of his drop by lathering him with touches and tender displays of affection, but it’s both a blessing and a curse.
His omega feels even more sure that this is how things should be. That Harry is his alpha. Maybe it’s the bond, or maybe it’s something else. Louis doesn’t want to think about that.
And even more worrying, Louis is pretty sure he’s just had a revelation about Sam, or more specifically, why he’s feeling certain things about Sam.
He’s been so hung up on the alpha for so long, always aching with the weight of just missing him. But now he finally understands the truth. He wasn’t missing Sam himself, he was missing the things he did with Sam.
Hugging. Cuddling. Kissing. Sex.
The intimacy of it all. The proximity. It’s the guarantee that you’re never alone, the promise that you’re one half of a pair, part of something bigger than yourself.
That’s what he’s been yearning for all these months.
It feels like a bucket of water’s been dumped on him, but also like he’s been freed from the confines of a trap for the first time in ages.
He feels lighter… but also somewhat terrified for what this means for himself considering the only intimacy he’s been getting is from Harry, also known as his future co-parenting partner, friend, and the other half of his soul bond.
However, his inner turmoil doesn’t last long as Harry’s stomach rumbles. The alpha grins sheepishly. “I’m used to having breakfast by now.”
Louis frowns, glancing at the bedside clock. “You’re used to having breakfast at almost 6 in the morning?”
“I have practice at 6:30,” he explains, perfectly nonchalant.
“You came here five hours ago even though you have practice?” Louis gapes, stunned at the admission.
Harry furrows his brows. “You dropped, Lou. I wasn’t just going to abandon you- especially because I had the best chance of bringing you out of it.”
Louis shakes his head, throat feeling dry all of a sudden. “Thank you,” he says again.
“It’s no problem,” Harry brushes off. He frowns. “By the way, I don’t know if you remember or if you were already under by then but I used my alpha voice on you last night to get you to relax because I was losing you. I’d normally never use it without consent but it felt like an emergency. Same with me getting into this nest in the first place. I understand if it makes you uncomfortable and I promise it’ll never happen again.”
“Oh- No, Harry, I completely understand,” Louis assures him. “Don’t worry about it. You did what you had to do to help me and it worked. I won’t fault you for any of it. I know you’re a good person and you’d never do anything to intentionally harm me.”
The alpha looks relieved, as if it’s been grating on him for a while.
“Now get up, we have to make you something filling if you’re going to go slamming into a bunch of alphas for practice,” Louis says.
Harry huffs out a laugh, amused, before sitting up and stretching his arms out wide. Louis averts his eyes, face warming at the flex of his muscles and the contrast between the dark ink of his tattoos and his tan skin.
It takes far more willpower than Louis’d like to admit to drag himself out of bed. He graciously allows Harry to use their shower as long as he promises to use Zayn’s shampoo and not Louis’ expensive organic one that he splurges on way too much.
Then he trudges to the kitchen, biting his lip as he considers what to make. Harry needs something substantial to fuel him through an undoubtedly grueling practice, but Louis also has limited time especially since Harry now has to drive himself back to campus- a much longer trip than his usual one.
He decides on a veggie omelette with chicken for extra protein and also a berry smoothie to make it even more healthy. He hums to himself while he cooks, monitoring the sizzling pan as he cracks the egg.
As always, his internal background music ignites an itch to dance inside him. He’s been away from the studio for two weeks now and the urge to plie and jeté is getting harder and harder to ignore, though the latter would definitely be a mistake at three and a half months pregnant.
But he still prances across the kitchen to grab the blender and then pauses to use the counter as a barre and does an admittedly sloppy arabesque but he doesn’t particularly fault himself seeing as he’s still sore and exhausted. He had gotten five blissful hours of sleep thanks to Harry, but it’s nothing against his weeks of headaches and constant midnight bathroom trips.
He pliés as he plates the omelette, performing a stage-worthy pirouette and then a second, just as perfect one, to the glass cabinet. He pours Harry a glass of the berry smoothie and himself a glass of banana smoothie which he froze for later in the fridge. Then he attempts a sauté which he quickly decides is a mistake, wincing at the sudden rush of nausea it triggered.
Shaking it off, he sticks to stepping. Pas du bourrée to the table with the plate and drink in hand, and then he risks a glissade back to the kitchen for utensils, keeping his core stable and movements light just in case. He’s still moving in glissades when Harry enters the kitchen, stopping abruptly at the sight of Louis leaping from foot to foot.
Louis freezes immediately, blushing as he gestures to the table in front of him. He sets down the fork and knife shyly and steps back.
Harry’s smiling softly at him when he gathers the courage to meet his eyes, his curls damp and eyes bright. “You’re a good dancer,” he says earnestly.
“You’ve barely seen me dance,” Louis protests, flushing even redder.
“I already know,” Harry swears, taking a seat at the table. “You have the grace and control of a seasoned dancer, it’s obvious. And the way you move so smoothly, even while pregnant, is amazing. I wish I could see you dance more though. Maybe in the future.”
Louis bites his lip, flattered. “Thank you,” he murmurs.
“Thank you for breakfast,” Harry says, cutting into his omelette carefully. “You didn’t have to do any of this.”
“Oh, it was the least I could do,” Louis scoffs. “To thank you for last night, er… this morning.”
Harry smiles. “You can sit down, y’know.”
Louis just barely manages to suppress another blush, timidly sitting next to Harry and clearing his throat. He fidgets with his sleeves, toes curling into themselves as he crosses his legs.
He feels tense and awkward, like his limbs and extremities are disconnected from his mind and he can’t make them work together. Somehow, he manages to take a sip of his smoothie.
Harry raises a curious eyebrow. “Is that a banana smoothie?”
Louis nods, wiping off any excess on his top lip before responding. “Yeah, I never really liked bananas but Baby really does so that’s what Baby will get.”
Harry smiles at that and they both return to their meals. Louis will have an actual substantial breakfast in an hour or so, content with just a drink for now.
The alpha eats quickly, the bob of his Adam’s apple obscene as he chugs down the berry smoothie. He sends Louis a quick grin, “That was delicious. Especially the strawberries- love those.”
Louis might be hallucinating, but he swears Harry just winked at him.
Throat dry, he hums his acknowledgment. “You stressed for finals?” he asks, deciding to play it safe.
“Fucking hell, yes,” Harry sighs, stabbing his remaining omelette piece viciously. “I’ve got no time between studying and practice and frat responsibilities. We had a dilemma with two of the boys last Saturday over chores and now they’re refusing to be in the same room together which is just another big fucking headache. And Coach is stressed about the next game which is why he’s been having me schedule extra practices where we can run drills and basically run ourselves to death. And I have no fucking idea how I’m going to pass my Music History exam. I don’t even fucking know why I have to take the class,” Harry huffs, “My area of focus is teaching with a side in industry.”
Louis blinks, taken aback at the rant. He hadn’t expected Harry to say so much but he hurries to respond, not wanting to alienate his venting. “That sucks,” he starts, “But the fact that you juggle so much is so fucking incredible, Harry. You’re so dedicated and hard working and I’ve seen how you put all your effort into everything you do.” Both in his endeavors and in the bedroom, Louis thinks embarrassingly. “I have no doubt you’ll be able to pull it off, but if you ever need it, I promise I’ll do my best to help as much as I can.”
“You’re sweet,” Harry says directly. Of course, Louis blushes again. Why does Harry affect him this much? Is it the bond or just Harry being Harry? “And I appreciate that. I hope you know you’re free to do the same.”
Louis chuckles. “I don’t play a sport nor do I manage a crew of brash, dramatic alphas on the regular, Styles, I’m just a lowly library aid. I don’t even have dance to worry about this month since I can’t participate in the Nutcracker this year,” he says.
He pouts, still upset about missing a second round of him playing Clara, the main lead. He had auditioned and gotten the part last year, running on pure adrenaline during finals week where he somehow balanced exams and extended sessions at the studio with Zach, his Prince, with ease.
As grueling and exhausting those days had been, Louis aches with how much he misses it. Misses the buzz and the thrill and the pride at performing well and having hundreds of people clap for you, all loud and praising. He misses the strain in his calves and thighs and the sores on his feet from dancing till almost midnight, sweating so much that his usual white practice shirt clings to him like a second skin.
“I’m sorry,” says Harry, reading the disappointment that pinches his face.
Louis shakes his head. “It’s okay. But more importantly, it’s 6:15 and you really should be going or you’ll be late to your death drills, Mr. Captain.”
Harry’s lips twitch as he stands up. “You’re right. Thanks again, Lou.”
“No problem,” Louis assures honestly. He glides up to Harry and takes the plate from him, shooing him away. “I got the dishes. Now go.”
Harry laughs. “Okay, okay,” he pauses, eyes narrowing. “Wanna get lunch on Thursday? I don’t have practice until late that day.”
Louis nods before Harry even finishes talking. “Sure, text me where,” he says. “I’ll even help you study if you help me go over Literature notecards.”
“Deal,” Harry says, flashing him a final smile before he heads off. Louis follows his figure as he walks to the door and opens it.
He averts his eyes, forcing himself to focus on washing the plate and placing it on the rack to dry, trying to rein in his now whining omega, pained at seeing his alpha walk away without a proper goodbye.
The door slams shut when Harry leaves and Louis finally exhales, trying hard to ignore the way the warm, fulfilling, safe feeling leaves along with him.
-
Louis startles awake, face flushed as he pants. Flashes of taut skin, heady pheromones, and gentle, large hands course through his brain, intimate but obscene. He lets out a pitiful whimper, hand immediately going down to feel damp fabric.
Burning arousal and simmering embarrassment fight within him.
He knew this was coming, he did. He’s read plenty of pregnancy books by this point and he’s known that hormones are going crazy, especially now that he’s in the second trimester. And he knew he’d be feeling… more desperate for certain things, but didn’t realize to what extent that would be.
In other words, he didn’t realize he’d be this damn horny.
With shaking hands, he reaches for the bedside table top drawer where he knows a variety of dildos are stored. It’s light in his room which means it’s morning, but he assumes it’s around five or so and he needs to be up at eight.
His sudden alarm cutting through the lurking silence refutes his guess.
Louis whines, hand falling to the table which he grips with pale, quivering fingers. His omega squirms, aching for attention and relief. But he can’t.
His first lecture is at nine and he needs to get ready, have breakfast, and get to his class which is on the far end of campus. Maybe he can tug one off in the shower, but it won’t leave him as satisfied as he’s craving.
Another wave of slick releases from his hole and he whimpers, sitting up slowly and wincing at the sticky feeling. He gets out of bed, sighing.
He definitely needs a shower.
-
Though he does tug himself into an admittedly pitiful pathetic orgasm, his desperation doesn’t diminish and soon he’s on his way to meet Harry for lunch.
Harry had texted him the place earlier so he inputs it in the GPS and drives. Louis frowns when he arrives, leaning back in the driver’s seat as he takes in the setting which is much fancier than his ripped jeans and baggy sweater would suggest.
But he goes in anyway, nervously twiddling his fingers as he tells the host he’s with Harry Styles and she nods, beckoning for him to follow.
Harry hasn’t arrived but he had texted Louis earlier saying he might be a bit late so he isn’t concerned. He flips through the menu, pretty sure he’s just going to order pasta. A quick glance at the drink menu confirms that yes, they don’t serve banana smoothies here- it was worth a shot in Louis’ opinion.
“Hello, my name is Aidan and I’ll be your waiter today,” says a deep voice. Louis glances up at the alpha who flashes him a suggestive smile. “We don’t get many omegas as pretty as you here,” he adds, winking.
Louis blinks, taken aback. The alpha is attractive, he notes. Dark hair, brown eyes, and a broad build, and a confident air that would be appealing to any other omega in his place, or even to Louis himself a few months ago.
However, Louis is definitely not in the right mindset nor situation to return this alpha’s casual flirtations so he smiles politely. “I’m waiting for someone,” he says, right as the familiar scent of pine and vanilla enters his consciousness.
Harry strides towards them with a frown on his face. He looks good in a dark button up and black jeans, hair damp from showering after practice and a jacket over his arm.
“He’s waiting for me,” Harry supplies, sliding into the booth next to Louis instead of the spot across from him. He’s radiating major territorial pheromones and they seep into Louis’ skin like a claim, making his omega whine in contentment.
He blushes as Harry wraps an arm around his waist, focusing his attention on Louis as he asks, “How’s my baby?” His voice is low and leaden with an edge of what feels like jealousy. It sends a shiver down Louis’ spine, only getting worse when Harry presses his other hand to Louis’ stomach possessively.
“The baby is good,” Louis murmurs, feeling embarrassed and flustered under the weight of Harry’s intense gaze.
“Uh, I’ll let you guys have some time to look over the menu,” the forgotten alpha says nervously, looking apologetic when Harry shoots him a look.
He walks off and Louis smacks Harry on the chest, rattled and maybe a little bit aroused.
“What was that?” he hisses.
Harry looks sheepish but it quickly morphs into guilt. “I’m sorry, my alpha got pissed and it just happened. But I shouldn’t have done it,” he says hurriedly. He hesitates. “Did you… did you want to flirt with him?”
“God, no,” Louis says, making a face. Harry laughs at that. Louis ignores the way his heart is racing after the encounter, insides rippling with the imprint of Harry’s hand on his stomach like a claim. He cannot get horny right now, he scolds himself.
When the nervous alpha waiter returns (much more subdued this time), they order and then proceed to talk and vent about finals, pausing when the appetizers arrive to scarf those down before continuing their conversation. They do go over flashcards for a bit before agreeing that they both need a break from studying and stuffing them back into their bags.
The conversation slowly moves from school and finals to hockey and how the team is still undefeated well into the season to details about their upcoming Winter Break. They’ve been texting about the full details. Harry will drive down to meet Louis’ family on the 23rd and stay through Louis’ birthday/Christmas Eve and Christmas before they drive even further south to visit Harry’s family on the 26th where Louis will be welcome to stay till New Year’s if he so wishes.
It seems so crazy now that Louis thinks about it. Everything is becoming a lot more real now that families are being involved. It’s like he and Harry are dating, deciding to take the next step to commitment by introducing each other to their families. But in reality, they’re taking the next step in commitment to co-parenting.
And Louis is just as nervous as he would have been for the first. However, Harry seems sure that Louis won’t have any issues getting along with his mom, stepdad, and sister, Gemma. Louis feels the same, already imagining how Harry will end up charming the Tomlinson household.
They then somehow start talking about football which Louis doesn’t watch and Harry seems very offended about that, but by now their food has arrived and Louis is having some… trouble concentrating.
He tries to remain engaged and retain everything Harry’s saying to him while also eating his pasta, but his omega is getting antsy at the close proximity, especially when Harry’s side brushes his every time he laughs or gets excited about something. He’s so close. And every touch is electric, tingling in Louis’ skin long after the moment has passed.
When Harry squeezes Louis’ shoulder sympathetically as he complains about his current freelance piece and how he’s struggling with it, how he leans into Louis’ space with sparkling eyes as he explains why the Packers are the best team in the country, and when their fingers brush as they both reach for the bread basket at the same time.
It’s all so distracting. And his omega is practically squirming with desperation inside him.
Harry doesn’t help, now taking a break to drink from his glass of water, jawline pronounced and Adam’s apple bobbing enticingly as he swallows.
Louis mimics the movement with a dry throat, forcing himself to not focus on how Harry’s massive hand takes up most of the surface area of the glass, gripping it firmly with his strong fingers. Tries not to think about that same hand gripping him by the nape firmly.
He hurriedly stuffs a bite of pasta into his mouth, blushing.
But Harry’s still drinking water. Throat muscles contracting and his lips curling around the rim to suck up the last drops before setting it down. “God, I’ve been so thirsty,” he remarks.
Louis makes a small sound of acknowledgement, heart pounding.
Apparently the universe has decided to torture him because Harry then starts to eat. He ordered a side plate of oysters and that’s what he starts with, picking up a shell and slurping out the insides. The sound triggers a different memory for Louis, sending a shiver down his spine as flashes of Harry rimming him flood his brain.
He feels overheated all of a sudden, eyes glazing over as Harry continues unsuspectingly eating his oysters. His lips are red and stained with sauce and Louis can’t help but remember when they were stained from his slick.
And of course, right at that moment, he lets out a small wave of slick, biting back a whimper and flushing deep red.
Maybe no one noticed, he thinks. But it’s too late because Harry stills, an oyster shell poised in his hand and lips still parted. His nostrils flare, his breath hitching audibly.
Louis exhales shakily, feeling himself radiate aroused pheromones. He’s mortified, praying that Harry won’t say anything.
“Lou,” Harry breathes, voice deep and strained. Louis glances at him under his lashes, heart stuttering when he sees Harry’s eyes darken, latching onto his face. His own scent spikes, undoubtedly reacting to the traitorous pheromones of his unmated, desperate omega.
“Sorry,” Louis whispers, quickly scooting away. “I’m-”
He’s cut off as Harry grabs his wrist. The movement is fast and his grip is firm and deliberate, long fingers easily enveloping the entirety of his slim bones. It elicits a whine that slips from Louis’ lips with a jagged gasp despite his best efforts. He shudders as he releases more slick, close to soaking through his jeans and staining the upholstery.
His pheromones are going crazy and the conversation between a group of mostly alphas in the booth next to them halts abruptly, all of them fighting against the smell.
“Don’t do that,” Harry says panickedly, tightening his grip on Louis’ wrist and scanning their surroundings. A rush of territorial pheromones surround them, Harry’s way of informing everyone else that Louis’ omega is accounted for.
Louis lets out another whimper when Harry shifts closer, caging him in against the booth sides. “I need it,” he breathes, mind being overtaken by his eager omega. It’s clawing at his insides, desperate for relief and satisfaction that only an alpha can provide.
It feels like he’s in heat but without the loss of coherence. Harry’s staring at him worriedly. “Okay, we have to go now,” he says, tugging him closer as he moves to leave. Louis whines, gripping his shoulders and pulling him back.
Harry stiffens, letting Louis dig his fingers into his shoulders as needy little whimpers fall from his lips. “Need it,” Louis whispers.
“Not now,” Harry shakes his head, looking almost scared. “Louis, we need to get you out of here. You’re affecting all of them, making them want you.” The last part comes out harder than the rest, a possessive edge to his voice.
“This is your fault,” Louis whines, digging his nails into Harry’s shoulders.
Harry’s mouth drops open and Louis realizes what he just revealed, face burning. He opens his mouth to attempt some damage control right as Harry growls, low and quiet but distinct and forceful.
Louis goes rigid, his omega submitting immediately. He tilts his head back, exposing the line of his neck.
“If it’s my fault,” Harry starts, voice hoarse and terrifyingly steady. “Then I’ll take care of it.”
The words register and Louis’ body jerks, insides turning molten hot as the implications settle in. “Where?” he breathes, desperate for whatever Harry’s going to say or do.
“There’s a perfectly nice bathroom that neither of us have seen,” Harry says, before his lips curl into a smirk. “Unless you’d rather I get you off surrounded by everyone-” His eyes darken, his look almost predatory, stroking a line up the sensitive skin of his forearm. Louis shivers. “You’d have to be quiet and good, kitten. Or else everyone would hear… but maybe that’s what you want?”
Louis whines, body trembling as he releases yet another wave of slick.
“You like that? The risk of anyone seeing you all flushed and gagging for it,” Harry breathes, squeezing his arm firmly.
“Please,” Louis begs- for what, he doesn’t know. All he knows is that he’d take whatever Harry deemed enough without a second’s hesitation. He’s still quivering, squirming in his seat as he searches for some much-needed friction.
Harry squeezes his wrist, stilling him instantly. “You have to do everything I tell you,” he whispers. He softens for a moment, other hand coming up to cradle the side of Louis’ face. Louis leans into the touch eagerly, whimpering when Harry thumbs over his cheekbone. “Does that sound okay? Yeah, Lou?”
Louis nods languidly, unable to speak.
“And if you want me to stop,” Harry prompts. “Say ‘red’ and I’ll stop immediately.”
He nods again, firmer this time.
Then Harry’s inching closer, turning to face Louis in the booth and blocking him from the sight of any waiters or other fellow customers. Harry leans in close, breath fanning out over Louis’ skin as he whispers, “Get in my lap.”
Louis exhales, scrambling to oblige. He straddles Harry’s waist and wraps his arms around the alpha’s neck, burying his face in his neck and inhaling his natural scent, comforting and safe.
Harry’s hands stroke down his sides soothingly, before sliding down to his arse. He gropes him a bit, kneading at his cheeks through the denim before his fingers sneak up the low hanging sweater hem and skim over his waistband. Louis doesn’t even have a second to feel embarrassed about the stretchy waistband before Harry’s sliding his fingers underneath his jeans and his underwear until his fingers are brushing his leaking hole.
He jolts, pressing his moan into Harry’s throat. Harry shushes him, resting his chin on the top of Louis’ head protectively as he circles Louis’ rim with two fingers.
“Fuck, you’re so wet,” Harry breathes. Louis shivers. Another caveat of pregnancies- he’s capable of producing copious amounts of slick at the simplest of triggers.
“Hurry,” he whines, pushing back into Harry’s fingers only to have them move away. Harry tsks at him and he whines louder. Harry moves his other hand to his chin, discreetly slipping two fingers into his gaping mouth. Louis moans, suckling on them easily and keeping his head hidden against Harry’s chest.
A permanent blush is staining his cheeks, especially when someone in the booth behind them laughs, utterly unaware of what’s going on less than a few feet away.
If anyone were to look at them, they’d think he and Harry were embracing intimately but innocently. However, if they looked closer…
He whines again, gasping out as Harry’s index finger catches on his rim and slides in up to his knuckle easily thanks to his pregnancy symptoms which include more slick and less resistance from his muscles.
It doesn’t take much to ease a second finger along with it. Harry fingers him slowly, keeping his movements dragged out and thorough. Louis grinds into the motions, sucking hard at Harry’s fingers whenever the alpha spontaneously decides to fuck in faster or scissor his fingers. The friction against his constrained cock is almost excruciating, but Louis’ already so close.
Finding his prostate doesn’t take long and Louis bites down harshly on Harry’s fingers, body jolting as Harry hits his prostate once, then twice, then over and over.
The host from earlier leads a couple past their table, chatting aimlessly and completely missing what’s occurring right under her eyes. Harry inches a third finger in with his other two and in the end, that’s all it takes.
Orgasms are a lot easier to achieve in Louis’ heightened, hormonal state but it still washes over him like a wave, his body trembling. He shudders, slumping further into Harry’s hold.
Harry carefully extracts his fingers, but only from his mouth. He keeps his three fingers in Louis’ hole, plugging him up and keeping him full. “Good, good boy,” he praises. “Did so well for me, darling.”
“Harry,” Louis breathes, clutching his shoulders desperately. He feels sticky and disgusting but doesn’t know how to ask.
He doesn’t have to. Harry figures it out immediately. “I’m going to give you my jacket. It’s long enough to cover everything if you keep it zipped. I’ll take care of the check and get your pasta boxed. You go to the bathroom and clean yourself off.” He seems pained saying the last part- like he wants to do it himself but can’t.
Louis nods, gathering up the remaining strength that hadn’t just been fucked out of him as he slides off of Harry’s lap. The loss of Harry’s fingers feels crushing but he powers through.
Harry helps him put the jacket on, holding it as he slips his arms through the holes and then zipping it closed, pressing a kiss to his forehead.
Then he slides out to let Louis get up, squeezing his wrist gently. Louis tries his best but still ends up waddling to the bathroom. Thankfully, he’s pretty sure no one noticed or caught his small winces from the soreness.
In the bathroom, he cleans up the best he can without a new pair of underwear or jeans to replace the soiled ones. He washes his hands, studying his dazed expression with hooded eyes. His heart is still pounding and he isn’t sure it’ll stop any time soon.
As he walks back to the table, observing as Harry hands the check to the waiter and picks up the to-go boxes, the panic starts bubbling up inside him.
They just… Fuck, Harry just got him off.
In a restaurant. Surrounded by dozens of people.
That’s betraying their unspoken agreement to be friends and nothing more in all types of ways. The nerves grow as Harry catches his eye, standing up and grabbing the boxes.
“Ready to go?” Harry asks.
Louis nods, confused because they both drove here so technically, this is where they’d separate. Still, he lets Harry guide him out of the restaurant with a hand on his lower back. It feels grounding especially since everything still feels floaty and blurry.
“I think we should talk before we go,” Harry says. Louis winces. There it is.
But he nods anyway. “Definitely.”
They sit in Louis’ car because it’s closer. Louis decides he really can’t bear having to sit through awkward silence as they both stress over what to say. “Thank you,” he says. “For doing… that. I’ve just been really, uhm, excited lately, I guess.” He blushes at the last part, still mortified.
Harry shakes his head. “No, it’s… That’s natural, whether you’re pregnant or not. And you… you deserve to be taken care of in that way. If you want… we could do things like that more often.”
Louis blinks. “Wait, what?”
Harry’s blushing now too. “I just mean… We’re both so busy and it’s hard to go so long without certain pleasures so since we’re in the same boat, and arguably the most convenient choice considering we have to see each other often. And as long as we both know it doesn’t mean anything beyond mutual satisfaction, then I think it’d be good for us.”
“But…” Louis trails off, shaking his head. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
Harry shrugs. “To be honest, not really… But, I mean, it was like you were in heat back there. Who knows what could have happened? This is what happens when you’re not being properly sated.”
And you can satisfy me? “That was only because you were turning me on,” he protests, blushing deeply.
Harry smirks at that before shaking his head. “As flattering as that is, my handsome face can’t invoke that strong of a visceral reaction without there being an additional factor, in this case being that you’re pregnant. Which means that being pregnant makes you more vulnerable when it comes to lust and so if I can help you quell that desire by getting you off, while also getting off myself…” he shrugs, “Seems like the best option to me.”
Louis huffs, considering the true consequences of them blurring the lines of their still newly established friendship. For one, if it ends badly- it has the potential to endanger their co-parenting deal.
As if reading his mind, Harry adds, “I promise literally nothing that could happen would make me bail on you. It’s my pup too and I already love them so much. I wouldn’t leave them or abandon you.”
He lets out a sigh of relief, but he’s still skeptical. “How often would this happen?”
Harry shrugs. “Whenever one of us needs it. It doesn’t have to be a set routine. Sex is always better when it’s spontaneous, but I understand if having a guarantee could be helpful. I think we’d figure it out as we go.”
Louis bites his lip. In truth, he didn’t need that much to convince him. The idea of being regularly sexually satisfied is enough to drive his decision. “Okay,” he says, before hesitating. He glances at Harry shyly. “Do you want me to return the favor?”
Harry shakes his head. “No! I mean, yes, but you don’t have to! This doesn’t have to be, like, a business transaction. If you’re not up to it, you don’t have to feel obligated to reciprocate, especially when it’s much harder for you than me to get off individually.”
“Okay,” Louis whispers.
Harry smiles at him, and suddenly it doesn’t feel so awkward anymore. “Okay,” he echoes.
Their conversation fades into quiet once again, Harry’s eyes dropping to Louis’ lips. He leans closer just slightly, his eyelids lowering just enough to seem intentional. Louis can’t help it when he watches him tongue over his bottom lip, growing desperate to feel that kind of connection again.
He tilts his own head as Harry continues moving forward, close enough now to feel Harry’s breath on his skin. Just another inch or so and they’d be touching, kissing, being together in the way that Louis hasn’t been able to stop thinking about. All of a sudden he feels the same way he had back in the restaurant, paralyzed with only his steady heartbeat sounding in his ears.
Harry’s lips quirk upward and twitch, his eyes flicking back up to Louis’ for a second.
“Maybe ‘okay’ can be our always,” Harry breathes. A second later he bursts into bright, loud laughter and backs away to his own side of the car to leave, but Louis’ still stuck in the moment.
Honestly, poorly timed cliche teen fiction jokes aside, he can’t say that he would’ve minded.
-
Though it feels for some points like he’s never ever going to be done with studying, he takes his final exam on Friday afternoon for his Literary Theory class, waving goodbye to his professor before heading home to stuff himself full with peanut butter crackers (today’s official strange craving) and take a nap in his lovely nest.
He gets a text from Harry, asking how he did.
I think I aced it :)
I know you aced it :)
The reply makes him grin. He hasn’t seen the alpha since they met up on Wednesday to study and vent to each other while studying. They had been in Louis’ room and Louis even let Harry into his nest, blushing when the alpha showered him with praises over how beautiful it is and how he could tell Louis spent a lot of time on it.
Zayn hadn’t been home which meant it had been a prime time for them to… make use of their newer method of stress-relief. However, they were both so stressed that they just exchanged quick handjobs (which still worked so he shouldn’t complain) and called it a day.
Harry has a game tomorrow morning so he’s probably on his way to practice right now, eager to cram in some last minute training and strategizing before they play tomorrow. Louis feels guilty because he, once again, is not attending. At this point it’s not even a matter of his disinterest in sports- he wants to go, at least once to see if it’s worth it, but this time he has an inescapable dentist appointment which is really just the perfect ending to a stress-filled week.
He makes a promise to himself to attend a game when they come back next semester before walking to the art wing to wait for Zayn, whose final exam finishes in twenty minutes.
After that, they’re both free. Zayn and him are both leaving for home on Sunday, while others they know such as Perrie, Niall, and Harry are sticking around until a few days prior to Christmas.
He’s scrolling through a string of supposedly related memes that Niall sent him, not paying attention to anything in front of him until he bumps into a firm chest. He stumbles, gasping as he fumbles for balance.
Two familiar hands grip his hips, rings digging into Louis’ skin and confirming along with the rush of a familiar woodsy scent that yes, this is Harry.
“Hey, Lou,” Harry says, sounding pleasantly surprised. Louis smiles at him before he realizes Harry isn’t alone. A familiar alpha smiles at him.
Liam Payne, Louis remembers abruptly. He shakes his offered hand.
“This is Louis,” Harry introduces. “He’s the mother of our pup. And Lou, this is my best mate, Liam. He’s my co-president in the frat and the right wing defender for our hockey team.”
Louis nods, sharing a brief look with Liam. “We’ve met.” Liam nods too.
Harry furrows his brows, looking between them. “How?”
“When I came to tell you about the baby,” Louis supplies, “He opened the door for me.”
“Oh,” says Harry. He claps Liam on the back. “What a gentleman.”
Liam rolls his eyes. “C’mon, Captain. We’re going to be late to practice because you wanted to talk to your omega.”
Louis and Harry blush at the same time. “He’s not my omega,” Harry denies, looking embarrassed. Louis avoids eye contact, flushed with the idea of Harry spotting him from a distance and wanting to come say hi. “You know that already,” Harry adds, a sharpness to his words.
Liam looks amused. “Yeah,” he agrees. He slings an arm around Harry’s glowering form. “Now let’s go, idiot.”
“I’m the boss of you,” Harry retorts, “So let’s go, Payne.”
Louis giggles at the indignant look on Liam’s face, smiling as the two alphas say goodbye and practically run away.
His grin doesn’t leave his face even when he arrives at the art block, searching for Zayn and finding him immediately. Zayn raises an eyebrow, taking in his happy face. “What’s up with you?”
He shrugs. “I dunno, just happy I guess,” he says.
Zayn looks even more incredulous. “I can smell Harry on you.”
Louis freezes, before frowning. “There’s no way.”
“I can,” Zayn insists. But he’s a beta which means he can only smell extremely strong alpha or omega pheromones. “You reek of him.”
“But I barely touched him,” Louis protests.
Zayn shrugs. “It’s common with soul bonded or regularly bonded couples.”
Louis blinks. “That’s so weird,” he says. Then because his finals have literally sucked all the common sense and sanity from his brain, he raised his exposed wrist to his nose and sniffs. “I don’t smell it,” he says.
Zayn chokes on his laugh. “I think you’re used to it by now. You guys have been spending so much time together.”
“Because we’re supposed to,” Louis insists. Zayn raises his eyebrow again. “And because we’re friends, geez. I like hanging out with Harry- he’s nice and funny and he doesn’t harass me like you do.”
The beta shakes his head. “There’s nothing wrong with any of that. But it’s like… things are suddenly different.”
Louis stills. “How so?” he asks, praying his minor voice crack went unheard.
Zayn’s unimpressed look shatters his hope. “What’s going on between you two?”
He shrugs in reply. “We’ve just gotten… close.”
“You’ve- oh my god, you’re sleeping together, aren’t you?” Zayn accuses, groaning into his hands. “Louis.”
“How’d you know?” Louis hisses. “Wait no- we haven’t even slept together yet… well, again.”
Zayn shakes his head in disbelief. “Louis,” he repeats. “This is such a bad idea.”
Louis crosses his arms, begrudgingly allowing Zayn to drag him to the nearest bench. He tries not to think about how the campus benches are quickly becoming the backdrop to all of his confrontations. “Why is it a bad idea? We’re two consenting adults.”
“Because Harry doesn’t do relationships during the school year, babe,” Zayn says.
“What does that have to do with anything?”
“It has everything to do with everything, because you’re going to fall for him and then he’s going to break your heart because he can’t give you what you want,” Zayn says firmly. “And then you’re going to have to suffer through awkward conversations and drop-offs of your kid because you’re too stubborn to let things fade away.” He gestures wildly, almost hysterical. “I’m going to be hearing bitter stories of your interactions for years to come.”
Louis gapes. “That is not going to happen.”
Zayn levels him with another equally disbelieving and unimpressed look. “Really, babe? Must we go over your track record when you’ve said you weren’t going to fall for someone… And then you did.”
“This is defamation,” Louis denies, scowling.
“It’s the truth,” Zayn corrects. “And you denying it even though we both know it’s true is just proving my point about the stubbornness thing.”
Louis doesn’t respond. Zayn’s got a point there.
“Look, you can do what you want especially if it makes you happy,” Zayn continues softly. “Just be careful, babe.”
“I will,” Louis promises. “Or I’ll try I guess.” He scoots closer and leans into Zayn’s side. “I appreciate you always having my back.”
“Always,” Zayn confirms. “You don’t have to thank me. You always have mine in return.”
Unsurprising to literally anyone, Louis feels tears form in his eyes. He sniffles, “I know but… sometimes it feels like there’s no way I’ll be able to pull this off, but then I talk to you… or Perrie or Niall or my mom or yes, Harry, and I realize that I’m going to go into parenthood surrounded by the best, most supportive and encouraging group of people ever. And then it feels less daunting.” He pats his stomach gently. “Baby is so lucky they’re being born into this family.”
Zayn looks a little misty-eyed himself as he nods. “The best family.”
-
Compared to the sheer amount of stress and worry Louis felt about Harry meeting his family and himself meeting Harry’s family, the actual events are a walk in the park.
Harry charms all the Tomlinsons just like Louis predicted, winning Jay over with his chivalry and courtesy when offering to help cook on his first night and later helping with the dishes, and then charming his sisters with stories or jokes or just sitting there and listening- something that is hard to come by in the household of eight, now ten. He bonded with Dan due to hockey and football, somehow leading to Dan promising to keep up with the hockey standings this year solely for Harry.
Louis’ twenty-first birthday goes even better. Most of his presents are predictably baby related, but he can’t say he minds. He also gets a bunch of books and gift cards which are also greatly appreciated.
He hadn’t expected Harry to bring him a separate gift for both his birthday and Christmas, but he had nearly cried when he opened the box and saw two crisp tickets for the Royal Ballet production of Swan Lake in April during Spring Break.
“You don’t have to go with me,” Harry had assured him. “But I remember you mentioning that you’d love to go so I-”
Louis just launched himself into Harry’s arms, squeezing him tightly. “You’re going with me,” he said. “I don’t want to sit by posh, rich people without my favorite one beside me.”
“I am not posh,” Harry had said, feigning annoyance.
And though Louis isn’t able to have his “first” sip of alcohol as a legal drinker, he still has a blast with his family, blowing out candles, singing, and screaming.
At one point Daisy smashes cake into Phoebe’s face and they almost start a food fight worthy of a trashy teen tv show, but Jay reprimands him. Lottie sneaks off to facetime her boyfriend. The younger twins shriek every five minutes for no apparent reason. Seeing them in particular makes Louis feel emotional. His own pup will be just a bit more than a year younger than them and it makes him happy to know they’ll have Doris and Ernest to make friends with and cause all sorts of trouble.
Because, looking at how messy and energetic the twins are, Louis knows they’ll be getting into lots of trouble.
It’s utter chaos. It’s home.
And somehow, Harry fits right in amidst the loudness and the messiness, with his dimples permanently out and grin stretching his lips, eyes shining whenever they meet Louis’.
Christmas morning is just as wild and disorderly, wrapping paper everywhere, tape on people’s pajamas, and everyone walking around with lids drooping blearily. Louis gets more baby gifts, tearing up when he opens a box of baby ballet shoes from Harry along with a leotard.
“Maybe Pup will take after their mother and be a dancer,” Harry says, shrugging. “Might as well start them young.”
“They could be a hockey player too,” Louis says, right after Harry opens his gift: a set of three hockey themed onesies, one of which says “Daddy’s Hockey Star”, the second saying “First Hockey Season,” and the final plain white with doodles of pucks and hockey sticks all over it.
Sometime in the evening, Louis finds himself laying against Harry’s chest in between his legs, holding back moans as Harry massages the knots out of his aching back. His hands are strong and large, perfect to knead flesh (in more places than one) and uncoil all of the perpetually sore spots.
Louis groans when Harry works on a particularly pesky one, fingers digging into Louis’ skin and into the crevices of his muscles, kneading vigorously. He massages like he does everything else- deliberately and meticulously, thoroughly.
It feels like heaven.
Then the alpha offers to massage Louis’ swollen feet and Louis has to stop himself from kissing him then and there. He slides out from behind Louis, leaving him to lean against the couch. Then he sits cross-legged across from him, gently picking Louis’ feet off and taking off his fuzzy socks.
He’s just as firm but still overwhelmingly gentle as he starts rubbing Louis’ right foot, humming along to ABBA which is blasting in the kitchen where the girls are helping make dinner.
Louis knows that Harry’s read tons of stuff about pregnancies but he’s still surprised when the alpha somehow seems to know which areas of the foot to ignore in order to prevent unexpected dangers that can be triggered by rubbing the hollows of his ankles or the corners of his pinkie toes. Harry is so careful and cautious, always treating Louis with the utmost care and respect.
He’s so distracted by Harry’s ministrations that he nearly misses the slight jolt in his stomach. It takes him a few moments to realize the jolt is actually a kick.
He freezes, choking out a gasp right as Harry kneads unforgivingly at the muscles near his arch. He lets out a small shudder, letting Harry move to a less explosive section of his foot before he speaks up. “Harry,” he says urgently, right as he feels a second kick. He gasps, going rigid.
Harry predictably panics. “What? What is it, Lou? Are you okay? Is it Braxton-Hicks? Are you hurting?” Louis shakes his head to no avail, Harry lost in a whirlwind of worry in his own mind. “What can I do? Tell me what I can-”
Louis grabs his hand and presses it flat stomach right as a third kick is felt. Harry’s breath hitches, fingers curling into Louis’ shirt subconsciously.
“Holy shit,” Harry breathes. “That’s… That’s-”
“That’s our pup,” Louis whispers, feeling more tears.
Harry’s own eyes are glistening too when Louis meets them. They wait a few more minutes, feeling a few more kicks including one instance of two kicks in a row. “They’re so enthusiastic,” Harry murmurs, sounding a mixture of astonished and awed.
“Future hockey player, then?” Louis guesses.
Harry grins. “Or a dancer.”
“Or both,” Louis adds, giggling.
“Or neither,” Harry laughs. “But we’ll love them all the same.” It comes out as low as a whisper, but with an easy confidence, as if there was no other possibility. And Louis really wouldn’t. Hockey player, ballerina, musician, teacher, scientist, doctor, lawyer- whoever their pup grew to be, Louis would love them.
This is what being a parent feels like, he thinks. A mess of unconditional love and pride and excitement and fear and confusion and almost any human emotion you can think of.
“Those books I read said the baby starts kicking between four and five months,” Harry says. “Ours was too impatient to wait the next six days I guess.”
“They’re an overachiever,” Louis grins. “Future athlete for sure.”
“Can you believe we’re going to watch them grow up?” Harry breathes, sounding emotional. “I mean- I haven’t even started growing up but the idea of seeing our pup learn to walk and talk and then send them off on their first day of school…”
Louis nods, deciding not to point out that only one of them will get to see those firsts. It’s more sad than it should be. “Watching them present, seeing them graduate high school or college, watch them get married- but only if they want to, and grow into a human being with their own thoughts, dreams, and feelings.”
“It’s going to be incredible,” Harry finishes.
“Do you think we’ll pull it off?” Louis asks, voicing dipping to a whisper. He lets some of his vulnerability slip through.
Harry nods. “Yes, I know we will. I’m going to be the best father and you’re going to be the best mother. We’ll figure it out.” He sounds so sure and Louis feels himself getting emotional again.
“Sorry,” he stutters, Harry staring at him with worry in his eyes. He shakes his head. “I’m just so glad you’re doing this with me.”
The alpha smiles softly, curling his arms around Louis’ middle gently and hugging him. Louis buries his face near Harry’s scent gland, letting the pheromones soothe him. “Me too,” Harry murmurs. “If I had to get someone pregnant that I barely knew, I’m glad it was you.”
In his stomach, their pup expresses their agreement, kicking three times in a row at the same time Louis is thinking the same amount of words in his head.
-
“Be quiet,” Harry grunts, backing Louis into the door while Louis clings to him desperately, biting back a whine.
He has no idea how things escalated so quickly, but he can’t find it in him to be annoyed. Dinner with Harry’s family had gone well, both of them a bit tired after a long drive in which they spent singing and laughing.
Harry drove of course, leaving Louis to doze off at intervals and man the radio.
However, all their energy has returned and has been building up ever since Louis ran his socked foot up Harry’s calf sensually and the alpha dropped his fork. He had stiffened, letting Louis continue his teasing ministrations until he finally snapped, trapping the foot with both of his legs.
Louis had whimpered at the action, masking it with a cough. But Harry knew. They traded dark, lustful looks throughout dinner, somehow remaining discreet even when Harry reached down to squeeze Louis’ ankle, making him jump.
Now, Harry cages him in against the wood, hands sliding down his sides to knead at his hips. They had dismissed themselves after dessert, heading upstairs for ‘an early night’ - except their night is far from over.
Instead of turning left to the lavish guestroom Anne and Rob had set up for Louis, he let Harry drag him right to his own room, promising that no one would bother them.
Harry ducks down to suck a mark onto Louis’ neck and Louis can’t hold back the small moan this time. He bites his lip harshly, heart racing at the thought of anyone hearing them.
Maybe he does have a thing for almost getting caught.
Except, being caught by Harry’s parents or his sister would be mortifying so he plays it safe, hand closing around the knob and turning so it swings open. He stumbles back, almost falling if it weren’t for Harry’s strong grip on his waist.
Harry nearly slams the door behind him, walking Louis back until his calves hit the bed frame and he jumps from surprise.
Louis shudders, letting Harry turn them around so he’s laying on the mattress and Louis is straddling his waist. He can feel the bulge of Harry’s cock nestled against his arse and he grinds down onto it helplessly. “Need it,” he gasps.
“Being on your back is risky,” Harry breathes, bucking his hips up. “So we’re going to have to do it like this.”
Louis whimpers, nodding jerkily. He lets Harry pull him into his chest, ignoring the sound of his inner omega whining. Harry’s room already smells like a mix of the two of them: woodsy and sweet and perfect.
They don’t need to bother with condoms, or lube considering how wet Louis is, so they quickly help undress each other, Harry mouthing over his firm stomach and eliciting another moan.
Harry quickly gets two fingers in him, stretching him open while Louis sucks on his pulse comfortingly.
He adds a third, scissoring and crooking them until Louis is squirming in his lap. The room is filled with nothing but the slight squelching sound of Harry opening him up, their rough pants, and their heartbeats.
Louis flattens his hand over Harry’s heart, letting the steady beat lull him into a state of peace. His omega surrenders full control to the alpha, completely pliant and trusting. Louis, for once, doesn’t overthink it.
A knock on the door interrupts them. Louis and Harry both go rigid, Harry’s fingers still tucked into his arse.
“Harry?” says a voice. Louis’ heart drops, panic bubbling up inside him. It’s Gemma.
Harry clears his throat, but his voice still sounds raspy and affected when he replies, “Yeah, Gems?”
“Just letting you know I’m going to be waking up early tomorrow morning for a run if you want to join me,” she says.
“Sure,” Harry agrees, breath hitching when Louis grips his length firmly. He stares at Louis with wide eyes and Louis smirks, stroking him slowly. He hisses, jamming his fingers up into Louis’ hole in retaliation.
Louis bites back a whine, circling the head teasingly and thumbing over the slit. Harry’s head drops to Louis’ shoulder as he lets out a small groan.
“Okay, goodnight,” Gemma says. “I think I’m going to turn in early too.”
“Goodnight,” Harry replies, voice shot and muffled against Louis’ bare shoulder. Thankfully his sister doesn’t notice and they both wait for the telltale sound of a door closing before Harry resumes his fingering.
“Brat,” he mutters, biting down on Louis’ shoulder when he lets go of Harry’s cock, leaving him painfully hard.
Louis bats Harry’s hand away when he tries to add in a fourth finger, pushing at the alpha’s chest until he lays back, arms crossed underneath his head and looking smug.
He rolls his eyes before straddling Harry’s waist, grabbing his cock and smiling when Harry hisses, hips jerking.
Aligning himself carefully, he sucks in a breath and sinks down, inch by inch. He goes ever so slowly, but he feels every little bit, moaning when he’s fully seated on the alpha’s cock. He waits a few seconds to adjust, marvelling at how deep everything feels.
Harry gropes his arse, squeezing as Louis raises himself off his cock and then back down, shuddering at the feeling. It’s like Harry’s cock is entering his stomach-
Where their pup is, fuck.
“That’s right, doll,” Harry slurs. “Look at you, so fucking pretty and all mine. Gonna put on a show for me, kitten?”
A show? Louis will give him a show, alright. He braces himself with hands on Harry’s lower stomach, feeling the taut abs constrict and flex underneath his fingers. Then he picks up the pace, switching between grinding against his cock and fucking down on it, knowing his arse looks amazing as it bounces with each thrust.
Harry groans as Louis digs his fingers into his skin, hips jerking up like he can’t help himself. Louis tutts, before leaning back and lifting his hands up. He smirks, fingers gliding up his own torso and flicking at his peaked nipples. He whimpers as he squeezes one of the buds particularly hard, teasing himself as Harry looks on with his mouth agape and practically drooling.
“Fuck, baby. You’re so good,” he whispers.
Louis squeezes his left nipple, shuddering and mewling quietly.
He slows down to a teasing grind, revelling in the way Harry starts to lose control. He groans, hands searing into Louis’ hips and most likely leaving imprints in their wake that’ll last for days. His hips continue to buck up, like he wants to flip them over and lose control completely.
“Someone’s impatient,” Louis teases. He traces one finger up Harry’s chest and traces over Harry’s swollen lips, still grinding painstakingly slow.
Predictably, Harry loses all his patience, growling as he begins driving up into Louis at an unforgivable pace.
Louis moans, thighs stuttering and quivering as he continues to move in tight, little circles. Harry thrusts up particularly harshly and Louis whimpers loudly, head thrown back and lips parted. Harry grips his hips with large hands, squeezing and kneading at the flesh. "Harry," Louis yelps when Harry leans forward to bite his sensitive nipple.
"Mmm, be quiet, kitten," Harry grunts, hands roaming up and down Louis' sides, warm and soothing. He tweaks Louis’ swollen nipples, making the omega stutter in his motions. His nipples had always been sensitive but while pregnant, it’s a whole other level. "My sister's in the room next to us and my door doesn't have a lock. If she hears you, she'll walk right in and see you all filled up and desperate..." He glides one hand up to Louis' lips and stuffs two fingers into his mouth.
Louis moans quietly, suckling around the lengths. There's a flush running down his entire body, all pink and glimmering with sweat. Harry seems entranced, still running his free hand over his chest with feather-light caresses. He makes no attempt to hide how his fingers linger especially on Louis' growing bump, eyes glazed and dark.
"You're all full of me aren't you?" Harry growls. "Full of my fingers, full of my cock..." He yanks Louis closer by the back of his neck, his grip rough and deliberate as he tangles his fingers into the soft parts of his hair.
Breath tickling the side of Louis' face, he shivers. The room smells like a mix of them, obvious and intoxicating. Louis wonders briefly how often Harry's mother comes into his childhood room- if she'll come in to change the linens and smell the remnants of their desperation and lust.
"Full of my pup," Harry breathes, finally. Louis shudders, keening forward with a whine as he comes. He slumps forward, relieved when Harry folds his arms around him gently, carefully flipping them over so he’s on top. He returns his fingers to Louis’ mouth which he sucks on obediently while Harry slams into him again, headboard creaking from the force.
If Louis could speak without whimpering, he’d scold Harry for being a hypocrite.
It doesn’t take long for Harry’s thrusts to go sloppy and animalistic, ramming into Louis and hitting his sensitive prostate on every other thrust as his knot begins to grow. He shoves in as deep as possible right as his knot locks in, locking them together and filling Louis with wave after wave of cum.
He groans, dropping his head to Louis’ neck and licking lazily up his scent gland. Louis whimpers again, feeling sensitive and sated.
Harry raises onto his forearms, his eyes intensely fixed on Louis’ own. “Open,” he grunts, voice hoarse and deep.
Louis opens, shuddering when Harry connects their lips and spits into his mouth. He swallows, feeling dazed and flushed. He doesn’t know why Harry has such a thing for spitting, but he definitely can’t complain considering the way it makes him feel: embarrassed but in a good way, a trusting and vulnerable way that he really doesn’t want to analyze right now.
Harry nuzzles into his neck again, blatantly scenting him. Louis hums, tilting his head back for easier access as Harry noses along his skin and then begins licking. It’s like he’s been rendered to his most instinctive desires and actions as an alpha: to claim, protect, care for…
Louis can’t lie and say he doesn’t like it.
After the knot deflates, Harry cleans him off and helps him get redressed. Then he helps Louis back to the guest room, trying to be stealthy. It feels like they’re teenagers and sneaking Louis back to his house without waking up his parents. He finds himself muffling his giggles with a hand over his mouth as Harry almost trips not once, but three times in the dark.
And though he’s struggling himself, Harry still keeps a protective and solid hand on the small of Louis’ back, grounding him as they make their way down the hallway.
He’s grinning when Harry says goodnight to him and also to their pup, pressing a kiss to Louis’ belly button before backing away.
It’s pitch dark but Louis can still see the shadow of Harry’s matching grin.
“Don’t trip,” Louis whispers.
“I’ll try,” Harry promises, and then he’s gone into the darkness.
Louis stands there for a few more moments, heart racing. He ignores the pang of his heart as he realizes that sometime in the past few days, Louis has grown to hate watching Harry walk away from him.
For the first time since he agreed to it, Louis’ beginning to wonder if this whole stress-relief thing wasn’t that great of an idea in the first place.
-
Second Semester
Louis attends his first hockey game their first weekend into second semester. He drags Perrie along with him because she knows more about the sport, despite the fact that Louis dated a hockey player for over a year.
It’s weird to see Sam play but Louis mainly focuses on Harry. In spite of Perrie’s valiant attempts to explain the game, Louis is completely lost. He just cheers when everyone else cheers and watches Harry as he skates down the ice, fast and confident and good- even if Louis can’t tell, he knows Harry’s amazingly talented.
He can also see how good of a captain Harry is. He’s a natural leader, huddling with his teammates during intermission and going over plays. Everyone follows his example on the ice, but he never takes advantage of their admiration.
Their team is exactly that: a team.
Every player is vital and they all play a big role in the ultimate win of 3-1, Harry scoring one goal and the center attacker, Anthony, scoring another.
Harry meets him after the game, eager to know Louis’ thoughts. Seeing his happy and proud face, damp curls dripping water onto Louis’ shirt when the alpha pulls him into a tight hug, just makes Louis’ heart swell even more.
“You were brilliant,” he says honestly.
Harry’s grin grows, eyes soft and fond as they look down at Louis.
Louis blushes under the attention, glancing at his shirt hastily. “You got me all wet.” He catches Harry’s smirk and glares, “Don’t.”
The alpha stays silent but he still looks smug. “Next time you should wear my jersey,” he says. “You’ve already got my spare with you.”
“Okay,” Louis breathes, heart racing. Harry wants him to wear his jersey.
“You’d look so cute in it,” Harry continues, oblivious to how much he’s affecting Louis who is now flushing all the way down his neck. “But no pressure.”
“I will,” Louis says, trying to sound nonchalant. In reality, he’s freaking out.
Tons of omegas show up to school games wearing their boyfriend or girlfriend’s jerseys, is the thing. It’s a cliche, but sweet tradition. Except there’s two things that are freaking him out. One, Harry and Louis aren’t dating.
And two, Louis has now just realized he wishes they were.
Fuck.
-
Whenever Louis needs a haircut, he always goes to the salon right by campus and he always requests the same person to cut his hair.
“Louis!” exclaims Hayley excitedly. She abandons her task of mopping up the previous client’s hair and barrels into him. However, it only takes a few seconds for her to realize something’s different. Her eyes widen, mouth dropping open in shock as she stumbles back. Her eyes drop to his stomach first before raising to lock onto Louis’. There’s a lengthy pause and Louis smiles nervously.
She shrieks.
“Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god! Lou, you’re pregnant!” she yells, before shrieking again. “How far along are you? I can’t believe this!”
Unable to hold it back, he grins. Telling people the news never gets old, he realizes. He has to physically hold himself back from blurting the news to random people on the street. “Just under five months but they’re a fast grower,” he says fondly.
He and Harry had actually gone for their second appointment together a week and a half ago on the 5th or the eighteen month mark. They had been eager to see if that was the appointment where they finally found out the baby’s sex but unfortunately, it was still a bit murky.
However, Dr. Jensen informed them that their pup was the size of a cucumber, weighing around 5 or 6 ounces and about 5.5 inches long. It had been astonishing to hear that their baby now had its own unique fingerprints and even more exciting, can hear them.
Harry whispered to Louis that he intended to talk to Baby as much as possible so they can recognize their daddy’s voice. Louis agreed, excited to both talk to his pup and also to start cultivating an early love for Avril Lavigne, ABBA, Oasis, Arctic Monkeys, and the other ‘classics’ which he considers a significant foundation that Baby needs in their life.
“We’re going to find out the sex at the next appointment,” he adds, grinning wider.
“Holy shit!” she yells again, before pulling Louis into another hug. Despite his best efforts, tears form in his eyes. Will he ever be able to go more than a couple days without crying during these nine months? Definitely not.
Eventually, Hayley lets him go and ushers him into the nearest seat, scolding him for not sitting down immediately with his ‘precious cargo’. She finishes cleaning up, still babbling excitedly about Louis’ baby and how they’re going to be just as beautiful as him and how she can’t wait to meet them. It warms Louis’ heart just like every time he shares the news with someone important to him.
“So what are we going for today?” she asks, messing with his hair eagerly. Louis smiles shyly.
“Just the same as usual,” he says, thinking of how Harry says he likes Louis’ soft, messy hair. He blushes at the thought of Harry running his fingers through his hair and glances up, meeting Hayley’s narrowed eyes in the mirror.
“What was that?” she asks, eyebrow raising.
Louis blushes harder. “What?” he says, fidgeting nervously.
Hayley squints at him, before sliding the apron over him and tying it. “That blush! Who are you blushing for? It’s not your sucky ex is it?”
Louis winces. “No… someone else.”
Hayley grins, “New baby and new man, I see someone’s been busy!”
“Oh no, no, Harry’s not-” He pauses, realizing he just gave it away and sighs.
“Harry, huh?” Hayley says, curious. “Who is he?”
“Another hockey player,” Louis admits, embarrassed. “Sam’s teammate, actually. He’s the captain.”
“Damn,” says Hayley.
“I know,” says Louis, groaning. “But we’re not… we’re not really anything. The baby was… unexpected.” He pats his stomach softly.
“But he’s still going to be involved right?” she asks.
“Yeah, he’s really nice actually. We’re going to co-parent, but um…” He pauses, and Hayley begins brushing through his hair, humming under her breath. “I think… I might like him,” he says slowly, the confession slipping from his lips like a weight off his shoulders. “Like a lot.”
“But…” Hayley guesses, looking sympathetic.
Louis sighs. “He’s got a policy for not dating during the school year because he’s so focused on hockey all the time… We’ve…” He trails off, blushing. “We may have been…. Um, messing around a bit. But I don’t think he’ll ever want to pursue more.”
“Oh, babe,” says Hayley, sadly.
He shakes his head. “It’s okay… As long as he wants to be involved, I’m happy. I’ll get over it eventually.”
Hayley doesn’t say anything, sensing he doesn’t want to continue the conversation. The next ten minutes are filled with their usual chatter: an update on Hayley’s writing endeavors, some pictures of her dog (which Louis tells her constantly he will steal if he gets the chance), and some harmless gossip. Louis laughs and giggles and ultimately loses all the tension he’s been carrying for the past twelve hours since Harry left his apartment.
“There, you look stunning as always,” Hayley praises, turning his chair so he can see his hair from all angles.
“And you did perfect as always, thanks babe,” he says, but his smile is strained now that he can’t ignore his feelings and focus on their conversation anymore.
Hayley sends him a sympathetic glance. “Call me if you ever want to talk,” she reminds him.
“I will,” Louis says, “And you call me if you ever need to talk. Or just put Moose on the phone, we have plenty to discuss.”
Hayley laughs. Louis leaves the salon feeling a thousand times lighter than he had when he walked in, a fresh haircut and Harry’s inevitable reaction if he ever gains the courage to confess on his mind.
-
Time passes quickly in a blur of studying, cramps, and hanging out with Harry as much as possible, whether it be on walks because being cooped up inside all the time is a lot less fun than he expected it to be, watching movies, making banana smoothies (Louis has taught Harry the art of the whole process), and more. Louis may be a masochist but he genuinely can’t see himself going through the days without seeing the alpha. He’s gotten increasingly dependent on his presence, his smile, his hugs, his scent…
And now it’s February 1st, also known as Harry’s twenty-first birthday and also the date of their next doctor’s appointment.
As in, they’re finding out the sex today.
Harry said it was the perfect birthday present but Louis still showed up at his frat, stopping to chat with Liam for a bit, to give him his true present. It’s a body art painting: a black canvas with the blue outline of Louis’ side, showing off the curve of his bump. In the corner it says, “To Harry, the best future father ever.” Louis also bought him a new guitar case but the painting was the true gift. As expected, Harry loved it and practically picked Louis up with the strength of his hug.
“Zayn helped me make it,” Louis has said shyly, brushing off Harry’s praise.
Harry’s grip on his hips had tightened then, lips curling into a frown. “Wait, Zayn’s seen you naked?”
Louis smacked him on the chest.
And now, forty-five minutes later, they’re sitting in the examination room as Dr. Jensen pulls in the ultrasound kit cart. Louis shifts restlessly, relaxing when Harry squeezes his hand, releasing some calming pheromones.
“Ready?” Dr. Jensen asks.
Louis exchanges looks with Harry, each of them making sure this is what they both want. Harry nods almost imperceptibly and Louis nods too.
“Yes,” Louis says, suppressing his urge to flinch like always when Dr. Jensen spreads the cool gel over his bump using the transducer.
The image processes and Louis squeezes Harry’s hand tighter. “Final guesses?”
“A girl,” Harry says thoughtfully. “I dunno why, just giving me those vibes.”
“Stop using ‘vibes’,” Louis scolds. He glances down at his stomach. “I think it’s a boy.”
Harry leans in close, breath tickling his ear. “If you’re right I’ll let you sit on my face and if I win, you can suck me off.”
Louis raises an eyebrow, fighting his blush as he lowers his voice. “I thought the point was you aren’t supposed to be rewarded for both winning and losing.”
Harry just smirks.
“Okay, guys,” Dr. Jensen interrupts, oblivious to their topic of conversation. He smiles warmly. “It’s a boy.”
Louis and Harry gasp, all wagers fading away as Dr. Jensen hands them the ultrasound picture. Louis starts crying again, letting Harry slide an arm around his waist supportively. “A boy,” he whispers.
Harry puts a hand on Louis’ stomach, both of them smiling when they feel a kick in response. “Hey, little man,” Harry murmurs, looking so happy and pleased despite being wrong. His eyes are watering too, a small tear sliding down his cheek. Louis wipes it away, sniffling when Harry turns his grin on Louis. “We’re having a boy.”
“I know,” Louis breathes. A boy. He can’t wait to tell everyone, especially his mother who’s already texted him a dozen times, reminding him to let her know as soon as they find out.
Dr. Jensen gives them a few moments to gather themselves before he continues with his usual spiel. Their little boy weighs around a pound, close to a foot long. Louis thinks about the one-pound bag of sugar he bought at the grocery store recently. That’s how big his baby is.
“Remember, Braxton-Hicks is a lot more likely during these weeks of the pregnancy so take it easy,” Dr. Jensen warns. “And otherwise, your health and everything looks good. Keep up with the vitamins and make sure you’re getting enough sleep. I know it’s starting to get hard to get comfortable but hopefully by now you’ve built a nice nest and you’re able to rest properly.”
“He has,” Harry says proudly. “And it’s beautiful.” Louis blushes, smacking Harry on the chest. Harry just beams at him. Heart racing, Louis tries not to think about what it’d be like if Harry slept with him in his nest every night.
If they were having this baby and raising their son together.
They say goodbye and walk outside, already talking about names.
“I was thinking something more gender neutral,” Harry says. “I know we said we weren’t going to think about names until we knew the sex but I sort of already made a list?”
Louis giggles. “You’re fine, so have I.”
They sit down in Harry’s car and decide that they’re too excited to not start thinking about it now so Harry pulls up his list. “Okay, I have a lot but my main contenders for a boy were: Jonah, James, Sawyer, and Noah.”
Louis nods. “Those are nice. But Sawyer Styles really?” Harry stiffens. “I mean, it’s a cute name but won’t it sound like a bit much?”
“Lou,” Harry says urgently.
“What?” he asks, confused by Harry’s affected expression. “Oh, was that one your favorite? I’m sorry but I just don’t think-”
“You said Styles,” Harry interrupts. He sounds like he’s about to cry.
Louis stills, lips parting. “Oh,” he breathes, heart racing. “I did,” he says carefully.
Harry stares at him earnestly. “You want him to take my last name?”
There’s an awkward pause in which they both just stare at each other. There’s something heavy and unreadable in Harry’s eyes, focused on Louis in all its intense glory. It sends a shiver down his spine. “Yeah,” Louis blurts eventually, blushing.
“Because you know, I wouldn’t mind if you wanted him to have your last name- you’re the one carrying him after all,” Harry rushes, looking worried. Louis smiles, endeared at Harry’s eagerness. “I mean, I’d love if our son shared my last name but… I don’t want you to do it only because you feel like you have to and because of traditional stereotypes of taking the alpha’s last name.”
Louis shakes his head. “No, it has nothing to do with that. I just like the idea of him having that connection to you. He’s going to be with me for much longer so it’s also fair.”
Harry smiles at him, soft and affectionate as he pulls Louis into a hug over the console. Louis relaxes in his arms, inhaling the smell of pine and vanilla. “I’m honored,” Harry whispers, voice thick with emotion and happiness.
“It’s really not that big of a deal,” Louis brushes off, still blushing.
Harry tightens his grip. “It is,” he says firmly. Louis doesn’t argue.
His heart is pounding and he feels uneasy and guilty because he didn’t quite say the whole story. He does like that their pup and Harry will share such a strong connection. But it’s also because he wants to make sure Harry has a strong attachment to their son and them having the same last name increases that chance. Because even though he knows Harry would never, he still wants to do as much as possible so Harry never leaves.
Because he likes the idea of it being obvious when their son is introduced that he’s Harry’s son. Even when Harry goes to the major leagues and inevitably becomes famous and one day settles down with an omega that isn’t Louis- Louis sighs shakily- at least their son will always be their link, the only thing tying them together.
Maybe it’s because he internally wishes that he had the same fate of surnames.
He remembers the night he met Harry and childishly pondered what his name would sound like with Harry’s.
Louis Styles.
The Styles family. Harry, Louis, and their son. All together. He swallows heavily, clearing his throat and hoping Harry can’t feel how fast his heart is beating. “What about Jamie?”
“Huh?” Harry asks, sound vibrating in his chest against Louis’ cheek.
“Jamie, as a name,” Louis clarifies, looking up at Harry and fidgeting with his sleeves. “That’s the one I found that I like the most and it’s sort of close to James already. And it’s gender neutral.” He shrugs, trying to be casual when in truth, he’s really hoping Harry likes it even just a bit.
“I love it,” Harry says, eyes bright. He squeezes Louis again, grinning lazily. “Jamie Styles.”
“Jamie Styles,” Louis echoes, throat dry.
At least one of them would have it.
-
Though it’s inevitable that his body is going to be changing a lot and very quickly, Louis still feels self-conscious about it.
At twenty seven weeks and on the cusp of the third trimester, Louis’ stomach is now the size of a basketball. Jamie is the size of a lettuce head right now, weighing around two pounds and over fourteen inches long.
Not to mention, his feet and hands have started swelling and he’s gained extra fat on his face and thighs. Right now, he stands in front of the mirror, completely naked, and studies himself.
Fingers grabbing at the flesh of his hips, he frowns. He’s also started slowly developing stretch marks over his stomach and though he knows they’re natural, he can’t help but stare at his body in its new unfamiliar shape and feel uneasy.
He and Harry have still been hooking up quite frequently, usually after Harry returns from practice, hair damp and inner alpha desperate to channel frustration or excitement about hockey into making Louis feel good. But the last few times, Louis couldn’t help but flinch whenever Harry tried to undress him, shying away from his touch and suggesting that they keep their clothes on instead.
It’s pretty obvious that Harry’s noticed something’s wrong, but he doesn’t say anything and always indulges Louis. Not undressing all the way just means they can get to the main event much faster, he figures.
However, he does spend the rest of these hookups murmuring praise into Louis’ ear and biting his lobe, running his hands up Louis’ sides and grabbing and kneading at his plumper curves. But Louis can’t help but… not believe him.
Instead of confronting the problem, he just ignores it. Some days are worse than others.
Like today.
Harry comes over late in the evening after Louis finished his homework and was working on a freelance piece, freshly showered and thrumming with adrenaline as he stalks into Louis’ apartment and immediately grabs him, hoisting him up. Louis yelps, legs slotting around the alpha’s hips. He winces at the thought that he’s too heavy but Harry seems to have no troubles carrying him to the bedroom and onto Louis’ nest.
“Want me to eat you out?” he asks, caging Louis up against the mattress and licking over his scent gland. Louis lets out a small whimper, shuddering. “You never did get to sit on my face like we talked about…”
Louis flushes, arousal coiling in his stomach as his omega keens. But weaving in with his desire, is deep worry and fear.
Fear that Harry will be disgusted or revolted by his thicker thighs. He knows the alpha is obsessed with his stomach, but what about everything else?
What if he’s been lying every time he calls Louis beautiful?
His omega whines in protest, convinced that Harry would never be anything but honest to him. Rationally, he knows his omega is right, but his brain can’t accept it.
Especially now that he has feelings for him and cares more than ever what Harry thinks of him.
“Okay,” he says finally before Harry can see the panic on his face.
He lets Harry switch their positions and watches him strip before sliding off his pajamas and straddling the alpha’s waist. He keeps his shirt off and doesn’t say anything, ignoring Harry’s frown and hoping he’ll let it go like he's done in the past.
Except apparently the world is not on Louis’ side today. “Kitten, can you take off your shirt? Wanna see you,” Harry coaxes, fingers curling into the hem of Louis’ oversized shirt.
Louis shakes his head slowly, ducking his head in embarrassment.
Harry’s hands settle on his hips and he flinches, cringing at the thought of Harry feeling the difference in their size. “Why not?” Harry asks, sounding confused and concerned. “It’s not anything I haven’t seen.”
“Yes it is,” Louis whispers, face burning in mortification.
The alpha frowns, sitting up so that Louis is in his lap. Louis crawls off slowly, scooting to the edge of the nest and ignoring the look of hurt on Harry’s face. “Wait, what?” he says.
Louis doesn’t respond, feeling embarrassed and wanting to run but not being able to because of his belly.
Jamie, why are you doing this to me? he thinks woefully.
Harry is frowning. “Lou, you don’t… you’re not actually worried about being naked around me, are you?”
He doesn’t answer, confirming the statement.
The alpha looks forlorn. “Why?”
Louis crosses his arms over his stomach protectively, shrugging helplessly. “I’m just… insecure I guess.”
Harry looks even more confused. “I get that, baby. That’s natural during pregnancies because your body is changing and that’s why I didn’t say anything at first when you started hiding- I didn’t want to draw attention to it and I figured it’d fade away. But… you’re worried how I’ll react, is that it?”
Louis nods slowly, still flushed all the way down his neck.
“Lou…” says Harry, disbelievingly. “How can you think like that? I think you’re gorgeous.”
Louis scoffs despite himself and Harry frowns.
“What?” he says. “You already know I think you’re the prettiest-”
“Stop,” Louis hisses, irritation and hurt rising in him. “Stop it.”
Harry looks stunned. “What the hell?”
Louis just shakes his head, throat feeling dry and leanden with discomfort. “I know how you thought but things are different now- I look different now.”
“You look just as beautiful as you always have,” Harry insists, slowly shifting closer. Louis flinches when he reaches out to touch and Harry retracts his hand, looking hurt again.
“You can’t think that,” Louis says, voice dropping to a whisper. His eyes burn with unshed tears, “You think my stretch marks are beautiful, all the extra weight? The fact that I can’t even fit into any of my old clothes?”
“I do,” Harry says firmly, almost flabbergasted. “All of you is perfect. Even now- especially now.” He looks distressed as he continues, “For fuck’s sake, you’re carrying my child. You know what that does to me, right? Knowing our pup is in your stomach. That I’m the one who put him there.” Carefully, he extends his hand again, flattening it against his small bump.
Louis lets him, eyes tracking the movement. He swallows. “You don’t have to lie to me,” he whispers.
Harry sputters. “Louis,” he says, sounding offended. He doesn’t give Louis a chance to respond. “Lay back,” he says, no, orders. “And take off your shirt.”
He’s not using his alpha voice but once again, Louis automatically has the urge to submit. He lays down and slowly takes off his shirt, using his arms to cover his newly exposed skin embarrassedly.
Harry growls, grabbing his wrists and pinning them above his head with one hand. Louis shivers, squirming as Harry rakes his gaze over his skin and all its imperfections unabashedly. Then the alpha ducks down and presses a soft kiss to his belly button. The contrast is jarring, making Louis gasp aloud.
Soft lips trail over his stomach, lingering where Louis knows the skin is red and stretched. He squirms in Harry’s hold, wishing Harry would skip over them but of course he doesn’t. He continues his path of featherlight kisses, reverent and gentle as he covers the expanse of Louis’ bump.
“Harry,” he breathes- pleads.
“You’re ethereal,” Harry whispers, sealing the words with a kiss to his hip. His breath skims over Louis’ inner thighs and he jolts at the feeling, letting out a small whimper. Harry bites down on the flesh, sucking marks on his upper thigh. Louis moans, hips bucking up into the air as his cock fills up and slick starts steaming from his hole. “Gorgeous,” Harry continues. “Your body is making room for Jamie, baby, and that’s the most incredible thing I’ve ever seen. How could I not love the evidence of that?”
Louis whines, legs trembling on either side of Harry’s body. “Harry, please,” he begs.
“Not until you understand,” says Harry firmly. He kneads at Louis’ thighs and the omega almost loses it. “Fuck, kitten, your thighs.”
“They’re thicker now,” Louis adds lightly, feeling that familiar embarrassment bubble up again.
Harry hushes him, kissing his skin repeatedly to soothe. “They’re beautiful. God, Louis, I’ve always loved your thighs and your hips but they’re wider now, so much more. I want them to smother me when you ride my face.” The last part comes out in a low growl.
Louis mewls, hips bucking up again, searching for friction.
“You’re going to sit on my face. Okay, baby?” Harry breathes. “And I’m going to love it. God, there’s nowhere I’d rather be than between your thighs, remember that.” He trails a path of kisses back up Louis’ torso, pausing to lick and nip at his erect nipples like he’s trying to imagine he’s sucking milk from the darkened buds.
Then he returns to his original position of planking over Louis’ body, breath tickling his face. Louis aches to reach up and break the distance between their lips, but he holds himself back. Harry is studying him again, an awed and adoring look in his hooded eyes. “Your body is a dream, sweetheart,” he murmurs.
Louis flushes all the way down his chest. The words sink into him, coursing through his veins like nectar or ambrosia. In that moment, Louis believes him. “Okay,” he breathes, dazed. His hole clenches, begging to be filled up.
Harry smirks at him before flipping them over. Louis straddles Harry’s waist, shivering when Harry groans at the slick leaking onto his crotch. “Get up here,” he commands.
Louis inches his way up, grabbing the rungs of the headboard before squatting in front of Harry’s awaiting open lips. Harry sends him an encouraging look from underneath his eyelashes. “Sit on my face,” he breathes, sticking out his tongue impatiently.
Exhaling shakily, Louis lowers himself so that his hole is above Harry’s tongue, thighs straining. He waits for a minute, his worries returning in an inescapable wave until two large hands grab his hips and pull him down.
He shouts, body jolting at the first lick.
Harry tugs him down further and secures his arms around his legs, face indeed smothered by Louis’ thighs. Louis is entranced at the sight and even more so at the groans and grunts slipping from the alpha’s mouth. He’s enjoying this, he realizes. He really isn’t disgusted.
The alpha flattens his tongue against his entrance, licking thoroughly and slowly until Louis is trembling above him. He’s just as amazing at this as Louis remembers, if not better.
Louis moans as Harry’s tongue finally breaches his rim, licking up into him like a man starved. Slick is still gushing from his hole with no signs of stopping but Harry seems to have no qualms drowning in it, the liquid falling down his cheeks and over his chin and neck.
As always, it doesn’t take long for Louis to come like this. Harry slides a finger in along with his greedy tongue and that’s all it takes as Louis spasms, thighs locking in place as he lets out a moan and spurts up his chest.
Harry lifts him up by the hips, hair all messed up and left over slick staining his skin. Louis almost comes again as the alpha wipes up all the remainder slick and laps it up as if he can’t get enough. “You taste so fucking good,” he grunts, eyes closed in satisfaction. “Strawberries and sugar and everything sweet and lovely.”
Louis is blushing- isn’t sure he’ll ever stop at this point. “Should I-” He glances down at Harry’s crotch, expecting to see his cock just as hard and thick as it was before, and breaks off. “You… You came.”
Harry looks smug, eyes flickering with something unreadable. “Of course I did. I’ve been dreaming about this for months,” he says, smirking.
“God,” Louis whispers.
The alpha gets a rag and wipes him down gently, pressing another layer of kisses over his stretch marks. Louis forces himself to stay still and not squirm away. “Don’t ever hide from me again,” Harry murmurs. “You’re beautiful and I’ll make sure you know it one way or another.”
It’s worded a bit like a threat, but it comes out like an oath instead.
-
Harry shows up to their flat the next day looking disgruntled and pissed off. Louis lets him in silently, curiosity growing as Harry stalks to their couch and flops onto it, taking up the entire piece of furniture.
Louis cautiously sits down on the armchair, freezing when Harry grunts.
“C’mere,” he says, voice low and hoarse.
He blinks, taken aback. Harry doesn’t use his voice or anything but Louis still has the urge to comply, letting his feet take up to the couch right as Harry lifts his hand. Understanding what Harry wants, he sits down and lets Harry rest his head on his lap. He’s releasing a ton of angry pheromones but they’re muted, like he’s trying to suppress them for Louis’ sake. Harry turns his face into Louis’ stomach up against his bump right as their baby boy kicks.
Harry lets out a small sound of surprise, lips parting.
“Jamie’s saying hello,” Louis whispers, unable to bite back his fond smile.
Harry presses a kiss to his stomach, lingering for a bit before murmuring a quiet, “Hey, buddy.”
Louis gives Harry a few minutes to initiate the inevitable conversation, content just petting through his hair gently. Harry nuzzles into his stomach, his angry pheromones slowly morphing into contentment. They mix with Louis’ soothing pheromones until they’re both immersed in each other.
“What happened?” Louis asks when it becomes clear that the alpha is purposefully avoiding the topic, keeping his gaze averted and his mouth sealed shut.
He doesn’t respond, grimacing into Louis’ shirt.
“Harry, what happened?” Louis presses, scratching his scalp soothingly. “You can tell me.”
Harry frowns, sighing as his eyes flutter shut. “M’just mad.”
“At who?” Louis asks.
He just grimaces again.
“Harry,” Louis sighs. “C’mon, you know bottling up your emotions isn’t healthy.”
“Ugh, fine,” Harry grunts. “But don’t you dare psychoanalyze me.”
“Who says I haven’t already,” Louis retorts, pulling on Harry’s hair playfully, “Maybe I’ve been judging your narcissistic tendencies for months, or your inherent need to take care of everyone and thing, and-”
“Like you and Jamie,” Harry interrupts. Louis stills, face burning.
“Yeah,” he says belatedly, his laughter fading into a quiet smile. “Guess it’s a good thing since you’re going to be a dad in a couple months.” It’s mid-March now and Jamie is twenty seven weeks old. It’s crazy to think about it. Louis is in the home stretch now. “Now back to you. What happened?”
“I got into an argument with one of my teammates,” Harry admits.
Louis hums in sympathy, already knowing how much responsibility and care he feels for his team. It’s one of the reasons Harry is such a good captain. “Did they do something?”
“They said something, more like,” Harry says, lips curling into a scowl. “And I got pissed.”
“What did they say?” Louis asks, thumbing over Harry’s temples and massaging them a little. Harry’s been giving him free foot and back massages for months now so it’s about time Louis attempts to repay the favor.
Harry doesn’t answer, frowning harder.
Louis glances down at him. “Harry, what-” He freezes. “It’s Sam, isn’t it?”
The alpha grunts, looking angry again.
“What’d he say?” Louis asks timidly, insides twisting with apprehension. “It’s about me, isn’t it?”
Harry growls which is enough to confirm it really. Despite himself, Louis flinches, feeling that familiar sadness rise in him. As if sensing it, Harry sits up and pulls Louis forward into his lap.
“Stop it, I’m too heavy,” Louis protests, face burning.
“You’re only a pound heavier which means you still weigh literally nothing. Stop being so self-conscious. I love your body,” Harry says, pulling him into a hug. Louis flushes at the compliment. Harry’s silent for a minute, scenting Louis mildly until he finally relaxes. “Do you really want me to tell you?”
“Yes,” Louis whispers. “I think.”
Harry sighs. “Lou.”
“Just tell me,” he says, resting his head on Harry’s shoulder.
“Okay, but remember that Sam is a dickhead-”
“He’s really not,” Louis interrupts. Maybe I should stop defending him, he thinks belatedly. “But thanks.”
“He is for saying this,” Harry insists. “He was talking to Michael and he said he broke up with you because you’re too needy for him and he got tired of having to deal with you.”
Louis jolts despite himself, the words sinking like knives in his skin.
“Hey, no, stop that,” Harry scolds. “None of that’s true.”
“He thinks it is,” Louis pouts. Harry looks even more anguished and he immediately feels guilty for making it about himself. “But continue.”
Harry just shakes his head. “I yelled at him and we had an argument and Coach had to break it up and now he’s disappointed because I’m Captain and I shouldn’t be having petty fights with our best offensive defender.”
“You were defending me,” Louis protests. “Which you didn’t have to do by the way.”
“He’s not allowed to talk about you,” Harry insists, looking furious again. “He lost that right when he broke up with you.”
Louis shakes his head, a movement made difficult since it’s still leaning on Harry’s shoulder. “It’s a free country, of course he’s allowed to talk about me. And he’s allowed to talk shit about me- I’m his ex.”
“But he’s spreading lies,” Harry spits, letting out another wave of angry pheromones. Louis wraps his arms around Harry’s neck.
“If he genuinely thinks that way, then they’re not lies,” he says gently, sadly.
“It just pisses me off,” Harry mutters. “How am I supposed to look at him without wanting to punch him?”
Louis groans. “Harry, no. He’s your teammate. You can’t afford to let this ruin your ability to play together, especially because championships are starting.”
Harry scowls.
“I appreciate your loyalty and I think it’s sweet that you stood up for me,” Louis assures him. “But the last thing I’d want is for mine and Sam’s problems to jeopardize your team’s chances. Our school could win championships twice in a row and that’s huge.”
Harry still looks disgruntled so Louis cups his face, ignoring how sharp his jawline is against his palms in favor of maintaining eye contact.
“You’re going to regret it if you let this fester into resentment,” he says firmly. “Hockey is the goal, isn’t it? The most important part of college and your future career. You can’t risk it.”
The alpha frowns, looking like he’s going to say something before he falls silent. “Right,” he agrees. “I’ll try not to,” he says and Louis rolls his eyes.
“I’ll take it,” he decides.
Harry is silent for a few moments, letting Louis smooth the wrinkles of irritation on his forehead. “Why did you guys break up?” he asks.
“Oh,” Louis says, letting his hands fall. “We talked about it, didn’t we?”
“Yeah… but barely,” Harry says. “You told me you said you loved him and then he broke up with you.”
Louis sighs. “That’s exactly what happened, there isn’t much else to it. He invited me over to watch movies and I just blurted it out and he stared at me and said, ‘Lou, we have to talk.’ We got into a nasty argument and then I stormed off,” he explains. He shrugs, willing the sudden onslaught of tears away. “I was so sure we were on the same page.”
“Oh, Lou,” Harry coos, holding him tightly as Louis’ face crumples and he starts shaking with silent tears. Harry gently tugs him away from his chest, thumbing over his wet cheeks with a concerned frown on his face.
“I don’t know why I’m so upset,” Louis murmurs, voice wobbly. “It’s been seven months and I’m over him now.”
“It’s okay to still have feelings about a relationship even if you don’t have feelings about the person anymore,” Harry soothes. “And you guys dated for a long time.”
“And yet, it wasn’t long enough for him to fall for me,” Louis says sadly. He shakes his head ruefully. “Is it bad that sometimes I think he’s right? That I’m too clingy?”
“You are not clingy,” Harry denies angrily. His brows are furrowed and he’s gritting his teeth. “And he’s a jerk for making you think that.”
We aren’t dating, how would you know? Louis bites his lip, refraining from saying the question aloud. “It’s other things too… He never invited me to see a hockey game, y’know? And we didn’t go on fancy dates- not that every date has to be fancy, but it’s nice sometimes, to be spoiled. He never introduced me to his friends or teammates. We went to a lot of parties together but he usually left me with Niall or later, Perrie while he went to find his friends. And he never asked to see me dance,” Louis says, trembling. He sniffles. “You’re actually the first guy to ever say you want to see me dance.”
“That’s a tragedy,” Harry murmurs, looking as he is personally offended by the statement. “Anyone would be lucky to see you move.” He rests his forehead against Louis’ and Louis sucks in a breath, taken aback by the tender gesture. “It seems to be the one with the issue in your relationship was Sam, not you.”
Louis’ heart pangs. “You know… I hadn’t realized it at first but recently, I’ve been beginning to. You’re right, I think.”
“What changed?” Harry asks curiously.
“I realized that our relationship was so one-sided from the beginning,” Louis admits. “That I wasn’t being treated like I deserve. And what helped me see that is actually you.” He blushes at the confession, feeling more exposed than ever.
“Me?” Harry breathes.
“From the moment we met, you’ve treated me better than Sam has in every way,” Louis murmurs. “And you showed me what it feels like to be valued by someone.”
“God,” Harry says. “Fuck, Louis. Of course I treat you like you’re valued. Because you are, so much. And you deserve an alpha who will treat you right and treasure you. Any of them would be stupid not to take care of you properly.” Louis flushes. “And to be honest, this isn't really making me want to play nice with Sam.”
Louis sighs exasperatedly. “Don’t make me do the ‘this is your future’ spiel again, Styles. Besides, as shitty of a boyfriend Sam may have been. I genuinely believe he’s a good person… who’s made some stupid mistakes.”
“And said stupid things,” Harry grunts, sounding peeved.
“That too,” Louis agrees. “But I’m not fully blameless. We never communicated properly. We were on different pages, yes, but that’s because neither of us talked about it. Well, until it was too late. And clearly we aren’t right for each other. It didn’t work out- that’s the way it goes.”
“I’m still pissed,” Harry clarifies.
“He can talk shit about me if we’re going to talk shit about him,” says Louis rationally.
“That sounds fair… I hate it.”
“I really don’t mind,” Louis says quietly. “Besides, if that all hadn’t happened I wouldn’t have met you.”
It’s quiet for a moment as his words sink in, Louis blushing while Harry raises his head, a heavy look in his eyes while he holds his gaze. Feeling like he’s accidentally revealed too much, he scrambles for a subject change.
“What about you? We never talk about your love life.”
Harry groans, laying back down. “You mean my nonexistent one? Oh yeah, it’s real fascinating.”
Louis rolls his eyes. “So you’ve never dated anyone?”
The alpha frowns. “Not since high school, no. I’ve only ever been in two serious relationships… Olivia Hernandez in ninth grade for about eight months- we drifted on friendly terms, and then Jesse Park in junior and part of senior year. He broke up with me just a day before the Spring Formal because he realized I cared more about hockey than him. That’s sort of when I realized that hockey had become my priority and ever since I guess it’s just been easier to keep it that way.” He shrugs. “I guess I’m lucky that I haven’t had a traumatic experience but sometimes I just feel… lonely? I don’t know.”
“Do you think your no-dating rules will keep up if you go major league?” Louis wonders.
Harry shrugs. “Part of me thinks that’s what’s going to happen, but I also don’t want to be single forever.” He frowns. “I like the idea of settling down and having a family.”
Having a family. Louis’ insides twist. Harry thinks about having a family, as in his own family. Not the fake Styles family that Louis yearns for, the real one. Harry and his future omega and any children they have.
Bile rises in his throat but he tamps it down, swallowing thickly. “You’ll get that,” he says confidently. “I know it.”
Harry looks almost pained when he smiles. “Thanks, Lou.”
Louis clears his throat, eager for a change in conversation. Biting his lip, he shifts in Harry’s lap deliberately, suppressing a smirk when Harry automatically grips his hips, letting out a soft growl. If he can’t have the relationship he wants, he’s going to take what he can get.
“What’re you doing?” the alpha asks, nostrils flaring.
Shifting again, Louis hums. “Just getting comfortable.” He carefully mouths over Harry’s jaw and down his neck, sucking at his scent gland lazily and beginning to grind in small circles over his rapidly hardening cock.
Harry slides his hands under Louis’ shirt, his warmth leeching onto the omega’s skin as he caresses down his sides, lingering at the curve of his waist. “What do you want, baby?”
“Want your cock,” Louis breathes, feeling the familiar tug of arousal burn in his gut. “In me. Preferably while I can’t see.”
The alpha groans. “You want me to blindfold you? So you’re completely vulnerable and dependent on your alpha? Is that what you want?”
Louis’ brain stutters at Harry calling himself ‘your alpha’, whining as he releases a small wave of slick. “Yes,” he pleads, desperate as he speeds up in his grinding. Oh how he wishes it were true. “Alpha,” he moans, letting himself revel in it even if it’s just this once.
Harry growls, and then Louis is being picked up and carried to his bedroom. Louis’ eyes widen when he realizes they’re going to have sex… in his nest.
It should be distressing- knowing there’s no way his nest will remain intact considering how animalistic Harry always gets, but instead Louis just feels eager. Even if he changes his sheets, his bed is going to smell so strongly of them, together.
Harry sets him down gently on his side (laying on his back is risky). Upon Louis’ guidance, he rummages through his dresser and pulls out a silk scarf that Lottie got him for Christmas last year.
This is definitely not how she wanted me to wear it, he thinks as Harry ties it around his eyes securely, pressing a kiss to his temple soothingly.
Harry opens him up carefully, blooming a path of kisses and hickeys down Louis’ back as he leans on his hands and knees, presenting and submitting. He slides a hand underneath Louis’ body to play with his sensitive nipples and Louis squeaks, his weight falling to his forearms as he trembles.
The soft material of the blindfold is distinctive against his skin, eyelashes brushing against the fabric with every blink. He can’t see anything but darkness, forced to rely on touch and sound as Harry lines up behind him, fingertips skimming over his hips and spreading his cheeks firmly.
The sound of their breathing is harsh against the silence of their bedroom, the blankets and clothes around them providing warmth and comfort as Harry inches his way in.
Louis moans, still overwhelmed by the sheer stretch even though they’ve done this multiple times in the past few weeks alone. Harry peppers kisses over the arched curve of his back, murmuring praises and compliments and telling Louis how beautiful, pretty, stunning, perfect he is.
Multiple times but each time it gets even harder for Louis to ignore that he’s more attracted to Harry than just their fantastic sexual compatibility. When Harry hits his prostate, he’s shouting with more feelings than just pleasure. When Harry’s knot locks in, his large hand loosely wrapped around Louis’ throat and pressing down slightly, he’s crying from more than just his relief.
When Harry finally pulls out, he’s aching from more than just the soreness. And he knows the next day he’ll see himself in the mirror, feeling branded by more than the marks Harry has left imprinted on his skin, thrumming with the ghost of his touch.
God, Louis is so fucked.
He’s tried to ignore it as much as possible, pushing all of his feelings and problems under the sheets like he always does and claiming he’ll figure them out later. Like it’s a simple decision and he’s “sleeping on it”, but he isn’t really. Unless he’s solving everything in his dreams.
All he’s doing is hiding from his problems. Hiding from Harry and Zayn and everyone else. He did it after he and Sam broke up, bottling everything up until he snapped and went out seeking a one night stand to replace his pain with pleasure.
He did it again when he found out he was pregnant, throwing himself into figuring out his schedule and the paperwork and treating it like it was a to-do list that he needed to complete as soon as possible. And while all of those things were still important, he was doing them in place of confronting his inner fears and worries.
But Harry. Harry’s helped him open up, even if he did it completely unknowingly. He’s helped Louis understand that he could pull this off- that he could be the mother Jamie deserved.
And today, he admitted that Harry helped him realize the issue with his relationship with Sam, helped him see how he ought to be treated. He’s not saying Harry changed his life or ‘saved’ him or anything, but he was there for him irrevocably from the beginning.
Steadfast and protective and safe and lovely.
He’s made Louis want to be a better person. He makes him want to be open about everything, except he can’t- not about this, about telling Harry of his growing feelings.
It’s so inconvenient, is the thing. If Louis is pining over Harry for the foreseeable future, he’ll only grow farther and farther away from him as he fights to stop his feelings. It’ll ruin their friendship and more importantly, they’re ability to co-parent functionally.
And for a very small chance that Harry may feel the same… As far as Louis knows, the alpha is still adamant about his no-dating rule and it seems like that’ll extend to his professional career. And if he made an exception, what’s the guarantee that they’ll work out? That they won’t crash and burn and make co-parenting even more awkward and tense for the rest of their lives?
It’s not worth it, Louis tells himself firmly. But his omega wails that it is, that they’d be enough.
Louis bids Harry goodbye at ten, the alpha having stayed for dinner (making sure to gush over Louis’ average-except-when-he-tries cooking skills). He ignores how the pain whenever Harry leaves has only gotten worse since that fateful back in December.
He remains at the door long after it’s been shut, just standing there and breathing. He can hear Zayn rustling around in the kitchen. The beta came home late after hanging out with some friends who live farther away and was now eating his and Harry’s leftovers.
In a few moments, Louis will go sit with him. Maybe he’ll crack a few jokes or let Zayn explain his current art assignment to him. Maybe he’ll complain about his thesis or flaunt his privilege of not having to physically attend classes now that his belly has grown enough for him to warrant special arrangements, in this case studying from home.
Basically, he and Zayn will talk about everything except Harry and Louis will let his feelings once again be buried in the confines of his mind.
He’ll continue sleeping on his problems, ignoring that they’ll lay abandoned but not forgotten under the sheets. He’ll hide from his feelings and pretend like everything’s okay. He’ll be strong. Strong for Jamie and strong for himself.
Because, really, that’s all he can do.
-
March slips from Louis’ fingers like sand and soon it’s Spring Break. He and Harry take a train to New York, staying at a hotel on the outskirts of Manhattan. Louis has been to NYC plenty of times over the years, but walking down the streets surrounded by skyscrapers and billboards and so many people never gets old.
He and Harry go sightseeing, strolling aimlessly and carefully through Times Square and eating churros, taking a walk in Central Park, and then a nap because Louis’ endurance has diminished significantly over the past month. Through all their activities, Harry keeps a firm, protective hand on the small of his back, steering Louis away from brash or careless pedestrians and glaring at leering alphas on the street who catcall the pregnant omega.
They also go baby-shopping. They buy a ton of onesies and other supplies at various baby stores, getting way too carried away. Harry even ends up buying them a fancy crib, much to Louis’ exasperation. Harry lugs the box around for another few hours before Louis takes pity on him and they return to the hotel.
By this time, his back is sore and his feet are aching so Harry makes him sit down and receive yet another massage from his magic fingers. Louis indulges Harry, letting him pet dangerously high on his thighs before shoving him away. “Take me to dinner first,” he sniffs.
“I literally am,” Harry complains, looking disappointed. They grin at each other. Louis ignores his traitorous mind pointing out how much it feels like they’re taking this trip as a couple, like a romantic getaway complete with touristy activities and appreciating the arts by seeing the ballet.
They get ready at six, heading to the theatre where Harry booked them a reservation for a pre-show meal. Louis doesn’t feel comfortable attempting to dress fancily when he knows it’ll just end with him feeling miserable and constrained so he keeps it casual, pleased when Harry does the same in solidarity. They stick out like sore thumbs among the other impeccably dressed restaurant eaters and later, audience members. At first Louis feels awkward and out of place, but then Harry intertwines their fingers and leads him to their seats and his apprehension fades away.
Swan Lake is incredible. Louis cries through all four acts, overwhelmed and utterly amazed as he watches one of his most favorite ballets performed so beautifully in front of him. Everything is perfect: the dancers, the costumes, the scenery, the music, and Harry’s hand on top of his on the arm rest, solid and unwavering.
Louis keeps glancing at him as Siegfried and Odette dance in the forest, pleased when he sees the alpha completely captivated. It makes him happy to see Harry liking something so important to him, both the story and ballet itself.
When it’s over, Louis cries again, feeling exhilarated and heartbroken at the same time. Seeing the ballet made his own deep longing for the dance all the more prominent. It’s been months since he’s been in the studio and with his growing stomach, even his kitchen dance sessions have faded away.
However, while seeing the performance increased his pining, it also eased it in a way. His love for the dance, the music, the story, and the costumes have been validated tonight and he feels inexplicable joy as they walk out of the theatre. Swan Lake had always been one of his favorites and seeing it in person was phenomenal. He doesn’t know how he could ever thank Harry enough.
But he does his best, flooding the alpha with all of his gratitude only to have Harry brush him off with a simple, “As long as it made you happy,” every single time.
God, how is Louis not supposed to fall in love with him?
They return to the hotel at almost midnight, raving about the performance as they trudge up to their room. It’s not an elite hotel by any means, but the room is still gorgeous and spacious with two beds and a beautiful view. Louis savors it for a bit, sitting curled up on the window seat as Harry takes a shower.
His heart feels so full.
Harry comes out of the shower with a towel wrapped low on his waist, droplets of water streaming down his chest. Heart heavy, Louis struts towards him, swaying his widened hips sensually. Harry’s eyes darken with want as he approaches, hands automatically coming up to still him with a firm grip on his hips.
Louis swallows down his sadness, fingers raking down the skin of Harry’s back before he tugs down the towel. Harry lets out a low groan as Louis grips his cock.
An hour later, they’re both in bed. As in, the same bed. They’re both still naked, entangled in each other’s arms and just breathing in the same space.
Harry is petting Louis’ hair softly, smiling when Louis purrs at the feeling. “Kitten,” he whispers fondly. Louis hides his blush, pressing it into the alpha’s chest.
I’m in love with you, Louis thinks. He feels empty, weighed down by his sadness and the loss of Harry inside him just moments ago before his knot finally went down.
There’s moments where he’s sure Harry feels the same. Like now, when he’s gazing down at Louis with so much adoration and tenderness. It’s like they’re both on the cusp of something more, but neither of them ever say a word.
His confession is on the tip of his tongue ready to slide out like honey, and yet he remains silent. They both do, looking at each other and recognizing the reluctance mirrored in each other’s eyes. It’s then that Louis realizes they’re both scared.
Pursuing the link between them may lead to something truly amazing, but as Louis knows all too well, the greatest of romances can end in heartbreak. But their potential heartbreak will be even more devastating than his and Sam’s.
Because it’s not just the two of them they’re risking.
It’s the pup nestled in Louis’ stomach, close to eight months old and already so dear to both of them. Louis feels like he’d rather not try at all than take the chance and have it end in agony that will affect their son.
Louis sees the same feelings shared in Harry’s sorrowful eyes, knowing it’s been decided.
Harry takes his hand, pressing a lingering, loving kiss on the back before he lets go and sits up. Louis lays still, blinking rapidly and breathing hard as Harry returns to his own bed. He can feel the loss of Harry’s warmth, his touch a ghost on Louis’ skin. Louis clings to the wisps of it, biting down on his lip harshly.
Neither of them say a word, they both know.
No more sleeping together, no more blurring the lines, no more more.
Louis curls up on the mattress, letting the surviving remnants of Harry’s scent lull him into his dreams. Once again, Louis stuffs his problems under the crisp linen and succumbs to sleep.
-
The moment he steps into the apartment and calls out a falsely cheery greeting to Zayn, the beta levels him with a look of sympathy, easily breaking through Louis’ defenses and seeing the hurt in his heart.
Louis falls into his arms, shaking with tears. “You were right,” he whimpers.
Zayn sighs, hugging him tightly. “Lou,” he says sadly.
He just shakes his head. “I’m going to call Niall and he’s going to come over and we’re going to watch Clueless and I’m going to pretend I’m Cher Horowitz and we’re going to eat pizza and we’re not going to talk about it, alright?”
“Alright,” Zayn agrees, looking pained. “I’ll order, you go take a bath.”
Louis exhales. A bath sounds good, especially if he uses his beloved AHAVA bath salts and allows himself to just soak and not think about anything. He nods to himself, still sniffling. A bath sounds good.
He sets it up, bracing himself on the edge of the tub as he slowly slides in. The water is lukewarm and soothing against his eternally cold skin. He lets out a sigh, leaning against the side and closing his eyes.
It takes him about ten minutes to realize that his mind refuses to be ignored, flooded with reminders and memories of him and Harry together. Them studying together, laughing, watching Friends, that one time Louis came to Harry’s frat and Harry introduced him to all his frat brothers, interacting with all of them effortlessly like the leader and role model he’s been destined to be…
Flashes of taut skin and sharp teeth and hooded eyes, glimpses of tender kisses and gentle touches, and endless replays of them wrapped in each other. Louis will never get to have that again.
Before he knows it he’s crying again.
Why does all of this have to be so hard?
“Jamie,” he whispers, fighting to regain his breathing. “Jamie, baby, you’re going to have the best father ever.” He pets his bump warmly and lets out a whimper when Jamie reacts, kicking up against his mom’s hand. “He’s going to be so good with you, I know it. He’ll be busy sometimes, I’m sure, but I know him. He’d never let that stop him from being there for you, always.”
He doesn’t know why he’s making himself hurt even more like this, but he continues. “He’s kind and good and he always treats me right. He’ll treat you right too.” He breathes in and out shakily. “He’s smart and hard working and determined. He always makes me laugh and he’ll never let you leave his sight without pulling a smile onto your face.”
“He’s special,” Louis whispers. “He’ll love you so much, darling. And that’ll be enough for me.”
It has to be.
When he finally drags himself out of the bath, water long gone cold, he changes into some maternity leggings and one of Harry’s sweatshirts, far past the point of feeling ashamed for always taking what he can get. It doesn’t smell like the alpha anymore, but it’s warm and big enough to fit comfortably over his stomach.
Niall arrives quickly and they put Clueless on. For once, the movie doesn’t wrest a smile for him. He watches in silence, nodding and humming his acknowledgement whenever Niall or Zayn make a comment, trying to make him laugh.
When Cher and Josh admit their feelings and kiss, Louis sours, practically simmering with his jealousy. That’s when Zayn pauses the movie, sighing.
“Lou, what happened?” he asks. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I was trying to give you space and let you tell me, or us-” Niall smiles sheepishly, lounging on the armchair nearby. “Did you tell him how you feel?”
Louis shakes his head. “I didn’t have to,” he says. “We both knew.”
“Wait, what?” Niall interrupts. He stares at Louis confusedly. “You both knew?”
“Well, we both realized,” Louis says, shrinking in on himself. “Do we have to talk about this?”
Zayn pulls on his sweatshirt strings, “Yes.”
Louis groans.
“So… he doesn’t feel the same?” Niall continues, furrowing his eyebrows. “That doesn’t sound right. Harry’s-” He stops short, eyes widening. “Or should I not say?”
“Harry feels the same,” Louis says flatly. “But he also feels the same in that we can’t risk Jamie’s stability by trying to date and potentially ending up heartbroken and resentful.” He shrugs, laughing bitterly. “We can’t gamble with our child’s future like that.”
“Jamie?” Niall wonders, sounding awed. “Is that his name?”
Louis blushes, patting his stomach proudly. He and Harry have already blabbed the sex of the baby to everyone from their family and friends to random people at Target, but they’ve kept the name pretty under wraps. “Yeah.”
Niall smiles softly. “I love it.”
Louis glances at Zayn, expecting to see a similar expression on his face as he also didn’t know the name but instead Zayn looks angry.
“You two gave up without even trying?” he asks, sounding pissed. “With all due respect, Lou, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.”
Louis gapes, taken aback at the conviction in Zayn’s voice.
The beta shakes his head. “I can’t- Louis, you can’t just surrender a chance at love because you’re worried about how it’ll end,” he spits, looking more saddened than mad now. “If Harry feels the same, why would you not try?”
“Because what if everything falls apart,” Louis murmurs, voice dipping to a whisper. He looks down at his belly. “Jamie deserves to have two parents who will be able to interact with each other.”
“Don’t you think him having two parents living with him together who love each other as much as they love him is even better?” Zayn says cautiously, softening up slightly.
“That won’t happen if we break up,” Louis says, shaking his head.
Zayn scoffs. “Not every relationship is going to end with a breakup, Louis. And even if it did, isn’t it better to have had and lost rather than to have never experienced at all?”
Louis grimaces. “You got that from a magazine,” he accuses.
“I don’t think…” Niall interrupts, looking hesitant. They stare at him. He clears his throat. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen Harry so attached to someone like he is to you.”
Despite his best efforts, Louis’ heart still skips a beat. “It’s because we’re soul bonded,” he denies, “All of that will fade away once I have the baby.”
Niall shakes his head. “It’s different, Lou. He’s- He’s never been this happy.”
Louis stops short, lips parting in surprise.
“And neither have you,” Zayn says gently. Louis ducks his head, face burning. “Isn’t it worth it to be happy?”
“It’s not that simple,” Louis whispers, “You guys don’t understand. There’s a reason Harry doesn’t date in the first place. Hockey is his priority and he’s only going to get busier and busier after we graduate.” In fact they’re graduating in a little less than four weeks, exams taking place the week prior. It’s crazy to think that after four years of constant work and stress and occasional sleepless nights, he’s finally getting his major (and a minor too).
“If it’s worth it, you can always make time,” says Zayn firmly. “Besides, I’m not sure hockey is his main priority anymore.”
His heart pangs. “What if you guys are wrong? What if he doesn’t think the same?” Louis implores, “About how trying is better than not trying.”
“How will you know if you never ask?” Niall says wisely.
They sit there in silence for a few moments until Louis finally sighs, pouting. “I hate you guys.”
“There he is,” Zayn grins.
Louis smiles at them and tries his best to joke around, doing his best to not let his sudden realization show outwardly - that what he feels now for Harry is so much stronger than anything he ever felt for Sam. Stronger than anything he’s ever felt for any alpha.
-
Louis winces, back cramping as he takes a seat on the cold bleachers. He’s dressed in those maternity jeans and Harry’s jersey with his hair styled for the first time in weeks, determined to at least look good while he’s miserable from the freezing weather and ear-splitting cheers.
They’re sitting a bit farther up on the bleachers rather than close to the glass, because Louis wants to avoid the crowds as much as possible. There’s a lot of people here, much more than the previous games he’s attended.
He can see Harry among his teammates, all huddled together at the sidelines, a mess of green and white. It hurts to look at him. It’s been a week since they returned from their trip and Louis confided in Zayn and Niall and he hasn’t seen the alpha at all. The text he sent last night had been the first point of contact between them in days.
Semis is tomorrow and I’d really appreciate it if you came.
Despite the time passed, he still didn’t hesitate to type out his reply: I’ll be there.
And here he is, wearing Harry’s jersey, ready to cheer for him and support him like nothing has changed. Because nothing has changed. Louis is still in love with the father of his pup, and he’s pretty sure nothing can stop it at this point.
“Why are there so many people here?” Zayn asks, interrupting his internal monologue. He glares as a woman pushes past them, chattering loudly about her coworker. Louis stifles a laugh at the beta’s miffed expression.
“Because this is a school event, dumbass,” he says once he composes himself, “And we’re pretty good at hockey, so...” He shrugs.
“Isn’t Harry, like, some sort of hockey star?” questions Zayn unsurely. Louis opens his mouth to tell him yes, Harry is a star, the team captain to be exact. However, someone else interrupts.
“Harry Styles?” says a voice. They both turn around to see a group of girls sitting behind them. The one who spoke- an omega with long, brown hair- pipes up again, looking sheepish. “Sorry, you guys looked confused. Is this your first game?”
“It’s his first game, and my third,” Louis says, feeling an irrational sense of pride at the fact.
“He’s definitely a hockey star,” says the same girl. “He’s so fucking fast too.”
“Emily, I’m pretty sure he knows considering he’s wearing his jersey,” says the other girl- an alpha with shorter brown hair and an amused smile. Louis recognizes her from somewhere, an art class from last year he thinks. He’s pretty sure her name is Alex. “I didn’t know Styles had an omega,” she says, looking intrigued.
“I’m not-” Louis begins to protest, even more sad at the inaccurate assumption.
“Yikes, I hope you’re prepared for the bloodbath today,” says Emily, shuddering for emphasis.
A feeling of unease ignites inside Louis. “What bloodbath?”
The girls exchange looks. “You don’t know?” Alex asks.
Louis glances at Zayn nervously before shaking his head.
“Well, I mean it's the semifinals… and they’re playing our biggest rivals,” Emily explains. “And Simmons is going to have it out for Styles. I feel bad for him already.”
“Who’s Simmons?” Zayn asks while Louis bites his lip, anxiety rising inside him.
“Howard Simmons, right defender and a major pain in the ass for Harry since he’s the right wing attacker,” Alex explains, “He’s been holding a grudge since last year when Harry slipped a goal past him in the last five seconds of championships.”
Louis blinks, remembering the stories of how Harry won them the championships last year as a junior. He remembers how Sam was walking on air for a week, proud of being their school’s first championship victors in over a decade. He never even considered the implications of Harry’s skills. Of course he’d be the main target for opposing players during games.
The past games Louis had attended had been tense, but Harry and his team glided to victory with ease each time. But this is the semifinals against their school rivals apparently, and an alpha who’s been holding a grudge against Harry since last year is going to be right at his toes…
“Hey, we didn’t mean to worry you,” Emily says cautiously, noticing his panicking. “He’ll probably be fine. He’s fast, remember?”
Louis nods but he’s not so convinced and telling by the little furrow between Zayn’s eyebrows, he feels the same. “Do you want to go?” Zayn asks with a low voice. “I know how you get and I think that’ll be bad for the baby.”
“No… I can’t abandon Harry- he wants me here,” Louis whispers back,“I’ll be fine.”
Zayn looks skeptical but he gives in at Louis’ pleading face.
They talk a little bit more to the girls behind them during which Louis tries to calm down, heart still pounding. Against his best efforts, his eyes skirt to the other side of the ice where the team of alphas in red and gold sit huddled together.
The animosity between the two schools seems ridiculously obvious now that he knows- alphas glaring and shooting each other murderous looks across the ice, a palpable tension settling in the air and among all viewers.
All too soon, the teams are making their ways into the ice. Louis tracks Harry as he ambles to the center for the face-off. He doesn’t look nervous- striding on his skates with pure confidence and deliberate efficiency. Harry’s teammate, Anthony, is the one to face-off against one of the sturdy alphas wearing red and gold.
The ref holds the puck and drops it at the whistle, backing off right as Anthony steals it and sends it flying to the left to Michael who shoots off to the attack line, dodging two players from the other team.
Louis picks out Simmons easily. He’s the right defender, burly and whip fast as he steals the puck from Anthony and sends it barrelling to their left winger.
The alpha races down the ice, quickly being surrounded by Anthony and Harry who corner him against the glass, forcing him to surrender the puck. Harry passes it to Michael who sends it back to Liam who dodges one of the other alphas and passes back up to Anthony.
It’s a constant game of back and forth, puck sliding from defense to offense within seconds of each other. The tension between both sides is increasingly evident, many penalties and deliberate shoving, pushing, and scowling directed to the opponents. Louis watches, sitting tensed with hands curled into fists every time a player brushes Harry.
Harry himself is playing just as confidently (and rashly) as ever, getting called for not one, but two penalties in the first period alone.
Then Anthony scores a goal in the final seconds, puck sliding in just inches from the goalie’s spread legs at an extreme sixty degree angle.
Louis screams with everyone else, mouth almost hurting from how wide his lips are stretched. 1-0, he thinks. They’re off to a great start.
The pause before the second period doesn’t last long and soon the alphas are piling onto the ice again. Another battle for the puck which is unfortunately won by the opposing team who race down the ice, going on offensive as the attempt to strike but are deterred by Sam, Liam, and Jaden’s strong defensive maneuvers.
An alpha on the other side gets a penalty putting their team on power play. However, the wounded offenders seemed to have kicked it up a notch in terms of aggressiveness and all of their team’s valiant attempts to increase the gap are squandered. Louis sucks in a breath, heart skipping a beat as Harry shoves into Simmons. He can see the fury on the alpha’s face from here but thankfully, he doesn’t retaliate quite yet, skating away from Harry in a fluid movement to chase after the free puck.
Don’t tempt the devil, Louis prays, wishing Harry could hear his pleads and oblige.
It feels like a slap to the face when the other team scores a goal, the other side of the arena erupting in cheers. Louis glowers, brooding with his resentment for the rival team and desperate for their team to catch up as soon as possible.
Zayn pats his shoulder reassuringly. “They’ll get it,” he promises. The most surprising part of the game so far has been seeing Zayn slowly grow invested in the game and their team’s fate. However, he’d feel a lot more smug about it if not for his profound stress for Harry and his team.
C’mon, he thinks. C’mon, Harry.
The constant seesaw of possession starts up again, switching from side to side of the ice, neither side allowing the other to hold the advantage for too long. The number of penalties and the amount of violence rise dramatically. Harry and Simmons once again go head to head, colliding in what looks like a very painful double-attempt at checking. However, both of them brush it off, already chasing after the loose puck.
There’s a palpable tension between them, visible even from this distance. Louis' stomach twists uneasily. He’s got a bad feeling about everything and he really, really hopes it’s just hormones and paranoia, not anything significant.
The second period ends at a stalemate, each team going to the sidelines and chugging water. Harry looks battered but faithful as he huddles with his teammates. He sees Harry clap Sam on the back, a clear attempt at maintaining peace.
It makes Louis smile. Harry listened to him. He knew he would but it still feels nice to see, to know that Harry values and takes use of his opinions and advice.
Anthony wins the battle this time, hitting it back to Liam to slide it to Sam who then takes off like a rocket, dodging the left defender and then dodging Simmons. He passes it to Michael who feints left before barrelling forward to shoot and-
The goalie blocks it, just seconds before it would have slid in past the post.
Louis groans, leaning further in his seat and shifting anxiously.
Both teams are desperate for another score, especially as the time starts ticking down. It seems like a nightmare when Harry gets penalized again, leaving their team vulnerable from the opposing power play as Thompson, the opposing right wing, slips past their team’s defenses and shoots a goal straight through the middle of Will’s shin guards.
Will falls forward, bracing himself against the ice in clear devastation as the other team piles onto each other aided by the chorus of screams from their school’s audience.
Louis remains entirely still, aware that he’s most likely unintentionally releasing a whole load of distressed pheromones.
He’s not the only one gutted. From his vantage point, he can just barely catch the slump of Harry’s shoulders as they get back into position. However, the moment the ref blows the whistle, everything except sheer determination and ambition fades away and Harry explodes.
The next few minutes progress in a rage of frenzied actions and brash decisions. It’s an even match in every sense of the world, the desperate and determined home team versus their cocky but still cautious opponents. A never ending fight to victory, whomever may prevail in the end.
Harry takes the lead, controlling the puck for longer periods of time than any other player. He’s whip fast as he races down the ice, every movement wholly profound and purposeful. Louis can’t help but marvel at the depth of his abilities. And though they’re currently losing with eight minutes to go, Louis can’t help but feel an intense pride for the alpha and how all of his hard work had paid off to make him easily the best player on the ice.
And no, Louis is not being biased when he says it with complete vehemence. Harry is so fucking good, it would be stupid to deny it.
He knows when to utilize his own skills but as a good captain, he also knows when to utilize everyone else’s. He walks- no, he saunters the line between when to defend and when to assert with ease. And never for a moment does he give anything less than his all.
It’d be stupid not to see how valuable he is.
Unfortunately, Simmons is also not stupid.
Harry’s just made it to the offensive line, close to the glass and ready to shoot an almost clear shot to the goalie. The opposing goalie crouches lower, swaying slightly as he does his best to cover as much space as possible. Harry raises his stick, poised to hit right as Simmons slams into him.
It’s not just an average check though, no. Simmons rams into him, pushing so far that Harry stumbles face first into the glass, body jerking as he falls to his knees.
Louis screams.
Harry raises his head, turning over to lay on his back and hissing in pain. Louis freezes at the sight of blood.
Dark and thick and wrong stained against the crisp white of the ice. Louis' heart rattles in his chest, a tremor racking his body as he sees Harry’s hands come up frantically to clutch his face as blood gushes from his nose.
“Holy shit,” Zayn whispers right as Louis stumbles to his feet, body shaking.
He watches dazedly as Harry is guided off the ice. The refs are huddled together, no doubt discussing the best course of action for Simmon’s consequences. Louis wants to scream.
But instead he’s close to sobbing.
“Lou,” Zayn coaxes, wrenching Louis from his furious thoughts, “Lou, babe, are you okay?”
“Harry,” he grits, breathing harshly. It feels like he’s going to have a panic attack. The whole scene is replaying in a loop at the front of his mind, the blood stark against the white of the ice. He shudders. ‘Harry… He’s hurt… Zayn, help.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Zayn says, squeezing his shoulders worriedly. “Calm down, Lou. You can’t freak out like this.”
“Harry,” Louis pleads, squirming out from the beta’s grip. “He’s hurt. What if, what if-”
“He’s going to be okay,” Zayn promises, “Look, the medical experts are going to handle everything.”
Louis just shakes his head desperately, unable to speak. He meets Zayn’s eyes urgently, on the cusp of a breakdown. Please, he begs internally, willing Zayn to understand.
It ends up being unnecessary when Emily from earlier speaks up. “You should go down to check on him,” she says.
Check on him. His omega perks up at the idea, still trembling with worry.
“Will he be allowed to?” Zayn wonders, sounding doubtful.
“If you’re persuasive enough, I’m sure,” Alex interrupts. She meets Louis’ watery eyes, “It’s going to be okay.”
He nods, letting Zayn take his hand as he stands up.
“Thank you,” Zayn says, before he tugs Louis forward, whispering an ‘excuse me’ to the couple sitting nearby, who they carefully maneuver around. They reach the stairs and Zayn pauses for a moment, craning his neck to scope out the best route. When he presumably finds it, he nods. “C’mon,” he says.
Louis clings to Zayn’s hand like a vice, trembling with nerves and terror as they weave their way down the bleachers and onto the ground.
“Excuse me, excuse me, pregnant omega over here,” Zayn repeats, pulling them through the traffic of bystanders until they’re close to the sidelines. Louis follows blindly, eyes blurred from tears and sobs racking his body. He places his other hand on his stomach protectively as some random beta shoves past him particularly roughly.
He’s officially at eight months now, which means Jamie is the size of a melon weighing about four pounds. Louis is exhausted by the time they reach the end.
They stop near the glass and Louis immediately scans the area for Harry but his view of the alpha is blocked by all the medical experts huddling around him. Someone from the staff raises an eyebrow at them when he sees them loitering, opening his mouth undoubtedly to inform them they aren’t allowed to go any further but Zayn interrupts.
“This is Harry’s very pregnant and very worried omega so if you have any human decency, let us through,” he demands, gesturing to Louis.
The beta frowns, but nods right after, gesturing for them to follow him. He lets them through the glass via a barred off gate and ushers them through the constricted space to where Harry is sitting, clutching his nose. The sight of gushing blood sends another wave of fear and nausea through Louis and he freezes in place, shaking.
His omega is wailing inside him, terrified that Harry won’t be okay.
He won’t know until he makes it over there but he can’t get his feet to move. He’s stuck in place, limbs locked and quivering obnoxiously.
It takes him a moment to realize that Zayn is trying to coax him forward, worry tinting his voice. Louis grits his teeth, still trembling. He squeezes his eyes shut as he sees Harry jerk in pain. The idea of Harry being hurt and in pain, makes him want to claw his insides out.
He doesn’t hear Zayn yelling Harry’s name until the alpha snaps his head up, eyes immediately locking onto Louis. And it’s just so typical Harry, that the alpha’s first instinct is to try to get up and get to Louis, eyes filling with concern even while blood is gushing from his nose and there’s a cut on his jaw.
Louis opens his mouth to protest but it’s too late. Harry strides over to him, arms immediately opening to wrap Louis up. He slumps in Harry’s hold, muffling his sobs into Harry’s messy jersey. The alpha coos at him, holding a paper towel to his nose with his free hand.
“Kitten, I’m okay,” he consoles but Louis just cries harder at the term of endearment, no doubt leaving snot and tears on the green fabric. Harry slides a solid hand to the small of his back, heat bleeding into Louis’ spine through his jersey.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers, letting out a small whimper. “Are you okay? What happened? Does it hurt? Why aren’t you sitting down? Sit down, H, please,” he rambles, near hysterical.
“I’m fine, little one, just a little bruised up,” Harry insists, voice lowering as his lips brush Louis’ ear. He rubs Louis’ back. “You should sit down, darling. This stress isn’t good for you or the baby.”
Louis smacks Harry on the chest weakly. “You getting hurt isn’t good for me or the baby, dumbass.” But it comes out wobbly and wet.
Harry chuckles, dimples making an appearance as he clutches Louis closer. The contrast of the nasty cut on his jaw and mangled nose to his wide grin is making Louis dizzy with relief and also inescapable affection.
The team physicians flock around them then and Harry answers their questions and lets them prod at his nose, wincing and grunting, all while Harry keeps a steady arm around Louis’ waist. Louis knows he should probably move out of the way but no one tells him to go and Harry seems to appreciate his presence so he stays.
“Ah shit, my nose is going to be fucked up after this, isn’t it?” Harry says after they’ve bandaged it up. He seems more amused than anything else, gently feeling around the dressings curiously. It’s clear he’s trying to be light for Louis’ benefit and Louis can’t help but feel so warmed that even when Harry’s in pain and in danger of missing the rest of one of the most important games of the season, he’s still trying to protect and take care of Louis first.
“I’ll still think you’re sexy,” Louis says firmly, preening when Harry grins at him, grabbing his fingers and holding them tight. It’s like they’re at a standstill. The pet names, the flirting, the pretending- this is definitely not what they both agreed on back in New York.
And yet Louis is sure he’s never felt so relieved in his life. The thought of Harry in agony makes him want to scream and cry and fight someone, even with his eight month belly in the way.
He ends up staying the remainder of the game on the sidelines with Harry next to him. The time is ticking down and their side is still one down and not making any progress. To make matters worse, Simmon’s penalty ends and he gets back out onto the ice, brutal and fast in his movements as he stops every attempt of scoring. There’s only five minutes left when Harry stands up and goes to plead his re-entry to the game.
Louis can’t deny he feels anxious when he sees Harry jump over the barrier, skating back to his position at right wing while Ben high-fives him and pulls out. Harry just got hurt and now he’s back on the ice, back in easy access for Simmons.
They do the center face-off and the alpha from the other team- Lennon- wins the battle and sends it to the right. Louis can’t lie and say he pays that much attention to the puck. His eyes are entirely latched onto Harry’s form as he skates across the ice, body checking someone and stealing the puck before taking off like a rocket to the attacking zone.
Simmons gets close, preventing Harry from scoring so he sends it to Michael in the left wing. However, the left-side attacker on the other team cross-checks him resulting in a minor penalty for the alpha.
Louis exhales, fidgeting with his jersey. Harry and his team are on power play again which means their chances of scoring have increased dramatically due to playing six versus five.
“It’s going to be okay,” Zayn whispers and Louis realizes he’s been squeezing his hand almost excruciatingly.
He lets go sheepishly, clearing his throat. “I just want them to win,” Louis confesses. He wants Harry to win and then win championships like he deserves. He’s been working so hard all year and he deserves this.
“It’s not over yet,” says Zayn confidently. There’s three minutes left as Michael takes off like a rocket to the attacking zone, trailed by only two defenders. He gets caught but spins and makes a quick pass to Sam who’s tailing him. Sam dodges Simmons’ desperate attempt to check him and shoots.
The puck flies into the goal at a perfect angle. Everyone screams.
Louis definitely screams.
Tied, they’re tied.
With two minutes and ten seconds left on the clock, there’s no way they won’t be going into overtime, especially when Harry and his team automatically go on the defensive, stalling their time as the opposing team gets desperate and aggressive.
The time runs out and everyone disperses for a short fifteen minute break. Harry comes over to Louis, taking off his helmet to reveal his bandaged nose again. “Everything okay?” Harry asks, sitting next to him and grabbing his water bottle.
“Are you okay?” Louis deflects.
Harry grins. “Yeah, it hurts a bit but I barely focus on it on the ice. It’s tied up, Lou. We can still win.”
Louis smiles too. “You will,” he says confidently. “I know it.”
Harry pulls him into his side as he gulps down the water. His gear is all wet and messy but Louis doesn’t mind. He slumps into Harry’s side and closes his eyes, breathing in the comforting scent of pine and vanilla. He loves him so much, he realizes. So, so much.
Fifteen minutes runs out quickly and then Harry’s skating back onto the ice and Louis’ nerves are returning.
A face off. The opponents win but Anthony steals the puck right away, sending it up to Harry who weaves around the center attacker and even dodges Simmons in favor of feinting left only to pass back to a waiting Liam, then Michael, then back to Harry.
For a while it seems like they’re unstoppable, but then Michael gets a penalty putting the other team on power play.
Louis bites his knuckles, stressed as Harry and the others are forced to go on the defensive. Thompson swerves around Anthony and takes a shot, going wide. Louis exhales heavily, feeling dizzy and relieved.
It gets even worse when Simmons comes in from behind and takes a second shot. Will has to dive to block it, skidding against the ice and falling awkwardly on his leg. Louis' heart seizes as Will’s leg twitches, the alpha wincing.
If their goalie is injured-
But then he’s standing up with the help of Harry, talking in low murmured voices. Will nods firmly and Harry claps him on the back.
They move to the nearest face-off circle and the ref drops the puck for what must be the twentieth time this game. Anthony wins the battle and sends the puck up to Harry who takes off like lightning.
Simmons and the other defender flank him, zeroing in on him until he’s forced to pass back between his legs to Jaden who passes it to Liam and then is intercepted by Thompson. The alpha dodges the defensive and aims to shoot, only to have his stick knocked away by Harry in a quick, strategic move.
The crowd roars at the action and Louis grins, feeling proud when the commentators praise his quick instincts. They talk about how Harry’s been a fantastic captain and impact player all season and he’s surely destined to do amazing things.
It’s as they’re talking about Harry when he races down the ice, passing to Anthony who passes it back to him right in time for him to feint right, pretending like he’s passing to Sam who has skated all the way to the offensive for what seems to be a preplanned play.
But he goes left, dodging Simmons who attempts to check him, and spinning like a fucking figure skater as he shoots and-
Scores.
Everything implodes, launching a stadium wide reaction as Harry and his teammates fall into each other, screaming and grinning and squeezing each other.
Louis is frozen in place, dimly aware of Zayn cheering beside him and the reserve players getting up to pile out onto the ice. It feels like the stadium has come alive, reverberating with the strength of people’s joy.
They won. Harry won. He did it. He won semifinals.
The opposing team slunks away, already forgotten as the sea of green and white. Louis stands up then, mouth curving into a wide grin as Harry breaks away from his teammates and comes his way, flinging off his helmet and shaking his mop of sweat-soaked hair like a dog.
He opens his mouth to congratulate Harry and shower him with more praise, only to shriek as Harry hoists him up and swings him around, grinning like a madman.
“You did it,” Louis screams, wrapping his arms around Harry’s neck and inhaling his scent, pine and vanilla and ice and sweat.
Alpha, Louis’ omega thinks. Home.
He falters at the thought, mouth gaping as it registers. However, Harry is looking at him now, grinning wide and looking happy and proud and everything Louis has ever wanted for him. “I did it,” he echoes. Then he’s leaning in close and Louis is swallowing, brows furrowed in confusion.
Harry cups his face with gentle, warm hands and kisses him.
It lasts a few seconds, completely chaste but groundbreaking all the same. Louis sputters, stumbling back. Harry looks ashamed.
“I’m sorry,” he says, looking horrified and guilty. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that without asking. I just needed-”
Louis shakes his head. “Harry,” he breathes, grabbing the alpha’s hand. He feels the tears returning. God, he’s cried more in the past year than he’s cried in his entire life. “I want you to be my alpha,” he says, voice unwaveringly steady much to his own surprise.
Harry freezes, mouth dropping open.
“Harry!” Michael hollers, cupping his mouth so it projects. They glance at the alpha, but Harry sends him a not now gesture.
The alpha turns back to Louis, eyes wet. “You do?”
Louis steps closer, emboldened by Harry’s hopeful eyes. “I’m in love with you,” he says honestly, voice wobbling. He intertwines their fingers. “And I want to try.”
They’re surrounded by people on all sides, a litany of screaming and cheering and yelling supplying the background music as Harry steps closer, looking down at Louis with so much raw emotion. “Are you sure?” he asks.
“Yes,” Louis breathes. He squeezes Harry’s hand, happy when Harry squeezes back. “We’ll take it slow, Harry. We won’t mess up.”
“There’s no way of knowing that,” Harry denies, rubbing circles on the back of Louis’ hand with timid fingers.
“There’s no way of knowing any of this will work out unless we try,” Louis whispers. “And I want to try. Please tell me you feel the same?”
Harry exhales jaggedly, leaning down and slotting their lips together. This kiss is longer but still innocent, all soft slides of their lips. Harry cradles his face again, holding him so carefully and tenderly, like he’s a treasure. Louis clutches his biceps in return, straining up on his tiptoes to reach better.
No one interrupts them, probably letting the lauded team captain get his reward however he so pleases. The voices around them never fade, but Louis and Harry are lost to them all, wrapped in a cloud of pine and vanilla and apparently, strawberries.
Louis pulls away eventually, desperate to hear the words come out of Harry’s mouth. “Is that a yes?”
“I love you,” Harry says instead, looking so sweet and earnest.
“Okay, that works too,” Louis grins, shrieking when Harry hoists him up. He clings to Harry’s shoulders, laughing uncontrollably as the alpha spins them around. Once again, his heart feels full. Just as full as his stomach if not more so. Speaking of his stomach- “Is this safe?” he asks, yelping when Harry spins them even faster.
At that, Harry stops abruptly, looking apologetic and guilty as he sets Louis down carefully. Louis just rolls his eyes, reaching up to wrap his arms around Harry’s neck and just hug him like he’s been wanting for the past seven days apart.
“I expect you to take me out on a date,” Louis threatens, voice muffled against Harry’s uniform.
“Of course,” Harry says, grin audible in his voice.
“And lots of cuddles… and your clothes… and kisses and massages and-”
“I’ll give you everything you want,” Harry interrupts. “Everything you need. I promise, Lou.”
Louis blushes. “You don’t have to be so sappy right now,” Louis mumbles shyly. “We’re taking it slow, idiot.”
“What can I say? You’ve got my entire heart in your hands already, sweetheart,” Harry smirks. He presses a hand to his stomach, fingers spreading out. “And your stomach.”
Louis just drops his head to the alpha’s shoulder, sighing in relief and utter happiness. He glances up, freezing as he instantly makes eye contact with Sam.
The alpha is watching them, looking pensive and something else indecipherable. When he realizes Louis has seen him, he doesn’t look away.
Instead, he smiles. There’s so much packed into that soft, maybe a bit sad smile: regret, apology, acceptance, and most of all, mutual happiness.
I’m happy for you is what it’s saying.
Louis smiles back. Thank you.
Then he turns his attention back to the alpha holding him lovingly, sinking into Harry’s embrace and letting the weight he’s been carrying for months and months slide off his shoulder and disappear. With a pup in his stomach, Harry draped over him, and a smile on his face, Louis finally feels complete.
-
Much to Harry’s relief, his nose isn’t mangled forever. It may be a bit more crooked now, but Louis doesn’t mind (he might think it’s actually a bit hot, but he’ll deny it to anyone that asks).
On April 11th, Harry’s team wins championships for the second time in a row, the first instance for the college team in existence. The game was held in Boston so Louis watched back in his flat, Zayn on one side and Niall on the other as they emerged victorious 1-0.
Harry didn’t end up scoring, but he had the assist for Sam who scored the game’s only goal in the second period. The two alphas have finally made peace now that Harry is secure in his role as Louis’ alpha and boyfriend, much more than Sam will ever be again.
He calls Louis right after the game. Both of them blushing and smiling into the phone, knowing they’re finally allowed to fawn over each other the way they’ve been wanting to.
He comes back the next day and takes Louis on their first date: a picnic at a local park which inevitably leads to making out in Harry’s car until a mom and her kids park next to them and they break apart, embarrassed.
Their dates continue, most of them indoors and involving movies and blankets and cuddling. And many of them just consist of them going shopping, splurging on pastel onesies and space themed decorations for the nursery they plan to build when they move out together because that’s another thing they’ve been talking about.
One thing is for sure, baby Jamie is going to be spoiled rotten for his first few years of life.
They’re not the dates Louis has ever planned on participating in, but he loves them all the same. He also loves the future date plans that Harry always takes the time to describe to him. He grows to adore the sentence, “When Jamie’s born, I’m going to take you to…”
Despite those joys, Louis continues to grow more and more frustrated and most definitely exasperating through the final month of the pregnancy. He somehow manages to take all of his finals (all of which were scheduled to his leisure and modified to accommodate him as best as possible- a small comfort) and on Saturday, May 9th, he graduates with a BA in English and a minor in Psych.
Both Harry and his parents both come to see them, fussing over their gowns and certificates before taking the couple to lunch which featured a lot of crying. Louis is not ashamed his own tears made up a solid 30% of it. That’s also when they announce the name of the baby, exchanging amused glances when their parents immediately start gushing over it.
Harry moves out of his frat house, him and Liam passing the reins to the next year’s set of seniors. He moves out and immediately moves in with Louis much to Zayn’s (feigned) annoyance. It’s only temporary but it’s not like the alpha takes up much space seeing as there’s nowhere else he’d be sleeping when he can sleep with Louis in his- their nest.
Jamie keeps growing and growing until Louis literally needs help standing up and sitting down, completely drained and bone-tired all the time. His mood also slowly deteriorates, until he’s unintentionally snapping at everyone at all hours of the day.
Harry doesn’t ever let it deter him, coaxing Louis into cuddle sessions and back massages and bubble baths, taking care of him unfailingly and lovingly.
Compared to how much Louis had worried, them deciding to date barely changed their relationship. As all of their friends made increasingly obvious in their teasing, Louis and Harry have been unintentionally dating since December. They can both admit that their friends are right. Louis believes the day everything started to change was when Harry brought him out of his drop, but it was all solidified the moment Louis said yes at the restaurant.
Though they argue sometimes and have their bad days, neither of them regret trying, not even a little bit. Louis’ love for the alpha only grows with every passing day, his affection skyrocketing whenever Harry greeted him in the morning with a kiss to the forehead and a kiss to his stomach, murmuring hellos to their pup and then handing Louis a cup of his favorite tea.
Harry somehow becomes even more doting now that he’s been given full consent. In public, he’s never farther than a few steps from Louis at all times, hand braced protectively on Louis’ lower back and asking him if he’s tired or needs to sit down every few minutes. He carries around water for Louis if he gets dehydrated and offers himself for massages whenever Louis wants them. And Louis doesn’t even have to ask for a banana smoothie- it’s like the alpha keeps them pre-made and stored somewhere, for fuck’s sake.
He never ever makes Louis feel like he’s not enough or too much. He tells Louis how much he loves him multiple times a day, showering him with compliments and praise and kissing his hands and hair over and over. He’s serenaded him with songs on the guitar or just with his lovely raspy morning voice, breath ticking Louis’ nape as he murmurs the lyrics under the beam of the rising run.
Louis has never felt so loved.
In fact, they’re curled up together on the couch watching Clueless- Louis needs to erase the bad memories that become associated with one of his all-time favorites the last time he attempted to watch it- on June 3rd when his water breaks.
Louis had been smiling softly as Harry patted his stomach after Jamie kicked particularly hard (he’s such a squirmy, energetic little pup), whispering, “Be nice to kind to your mother, buddy,” in a scolding tone.
Seconds later, he feels the telltale wetness and gasps.
From the moment they get into the car, the hospital bag in the back seat and hands linked over the console as Harry pulls out into the street while praising Louis for how well he’s doing even though all he’s doing is squeezing the life out of Harry’s fingers and grunting in pain, Louis knows that they’re entering a new chapter of life.
Newly graduated, newly in love, and by tomorrow, newly parents, they’re going to take on the world. Together.
Jamie Alexander Styles is born at one in the morning on the dot after seven hours of intense labor and Harry’s almost injured hand muscles.
And then it begins.
-
Harry looks down at a sleeping Jamie who’s laying nestled in his crib, sucking on his thumb messily. He sighs, a fond smile curving his lips when his son snuffles adorably in his sleep.
The nursery is dark save for the dim gleam of the glow and the dark stars they plastered across the ceiling in the shape of the most popular constellations.
It’s his turn for ‘sleeping duty’, having spent half an hour rocking Jamie gently on their rocking chair before the baby finally drifted to sleep. He had stared at him wondrously for another ten minutes, heart swelling for the amount of love he feels for the boy.
Jamie is a month old now, the cutest little boy Harry’s ever seen and already a perfect mix of him and his Louis. Wisps of blonde hair that remind Harry of his own hair when he was a baby curl around his precious little face, and though they’re shut right now, Jamie has Louis’ eyes. Harry was so pleased with the latter- there’s not much in the world he loves more than the color of Louis’ eyes but now it’s immortalized forever in the irises of his two favorite boys in the world.
Speaking of his two favorite boys, the familiar and just as intoxicating as always scent of strawberries wafts through the room as Louis shuffles in, rubbing tiredly at his eyes. He looks adorable bundled up in one of Harry’s sleep shirts and some pink hello kitty pajamas. His hair is sticking up and there’s dark bags underneath his eyes- a mirrored version of Harry’s own- but he’s still the most gorgeous creature Harry has ever seen.
His hair is feathery and soft as always, blue eyes bright and lovely even while tired, and features just as delicate and angelic as the day he first met him, absolutely floored by Louis’ beauty at their last summer frat party when the omega was standing in the kitchen and their eyes first met.
Louis tucks himself into Harry’s side, sliding his arms around his waist to steady himself as he leans his entire weight on the alpha. Harry hums, pressing a kiss to Louis’ hair and pressing a solid hand to his spine just below his shoulder blades.
“Jamie’s asleep,” the omega breathes, sounding awed.
Harry chuckles. “He does do that sometimes, as infrequently as it may seem.”
Louis makes a small sound, nuzzling into Harry’s shirt and scenting him for comfort. Harry licks a small stripe up his scent gland, smiling when Louis shivers, breathing out shakily.
In two weeks, they’ll be given the call to be able to have sex again and Harry’s hungry alpha is counting down the days.
Harry presses another kiss to Louis’ head, lips brushing his temple this time. “Sleep?”
Louis nods into his chest, murmuring a muffled, “Yes.”
Harry walks them out of the room, keeping his arms wrapped around his boyfriend securely until they enter their own bedroom. He pulls them onto the bed, stripping off his shirt and letting Louis curl up against his chest like he always does. Louis rests a hand over his heartbeat and Harry places his own on top, fingers filling the gaps of Louis’ smaller ones.
“Congratulations again,” Louis whispers after a bit, rousing him from his drowsy thoughts. Harry had assumed Louis had fallen asleep already, the omega having somehow mastered the ability of dropping unconscious at the most inconvenient of times over the course of the last month.
“Thanks, baby,” Harry murmurs, petting over Louis’ hair softly with his other hand. He grins despite himself, still giddy as the email he received that morning replays in his mind. Dear Harry Styles, We are pleased to inform you that you’ve been selected as a pick for the Washington Capitals.
“Are you sure you’re okay with moving to DC?” Harry whispers.
“I’d follow you anywhere,” Louis murmurs. Harry groans, squeezing him tight.
“Don’t say stuff like that or we’re never going to go to sleep,” he grunts. Louis giggles, the little minx.
“I’m just happy it’s only a few hours away,” Louis says after a bit, lips brushing the area between Harry’s pecs. “I know Mom and Anne are too,” he says and Harry can feel his smile against his skin.
“Mhm, speaking of which. Mom wants to come by and steal Jamie from us sometime next week,” Harry says, yawning quietly.
“Everyone wants to steal our boy,” Louis mutters, “Your mom, my mom, Perrie, Zayn, Niall, even Liam.”
“I think Liam’s trying to beat Zayn for the title of best godfather,” Harry says, smiling at the thought.
“Hmm, I dunno. They looked pretty cozy last week at Movie Night,” Louis says coyly.
Harry stills, taken aback. “Wait, what? What did Zayn say? Liam didn’t say anything to me!”
“He hasn’t said anything, but I can see his shy smile whenever Liam comes in in conversation,” Louis says, shuddering. “Disgusting.”
“I guess it’s only fair we’re subjected to months of awkward flirting and pining,” Harry muses, “Considering they watched us do it for the entire school year.”
Louis smacks his chest. “Knothead. My pining was justified considering you were so adamant about not dating so you can focus on hockey.” He scoffs.
“Hey. I was plenty obvious, kitten, s’not my fault you didn’t notice,” Harry denies, “I was pretty much smitten with you from the beginning.”
“That’s true,” Louis agrees. “But how was I supposed to know I was the exception?”
Harry shrugs, jostling Louis’ body only slightly. He ignores the jab to his ribs he gets in return, settling for sliding a hand under Louis’ shirt and rubbing soothingly up and down his cold back, warming him up. “I didn’t even know until it was too late and I had already fallen for you,” Harry simpers, smiling when Louis gags. “But seriously, I never thought anything could be more important than hockey when I was still so young, but… then you and Jamie came and proved me wrong.”
Louis doesn’t respond but Harry knows he’s blushing, hiding it against Harry’s chest. He feels a flash of jealousy towards his shirt for getting to feel Louis’ pretty pink cheeks, wishing he could see his delicate flush himself but knowing it’s too dark.
“You didn’t make it obvious,” Louis says grumpily. “I guess you didn’t…”
Harry frowns in confusion as the omega trails off. “Didn’t what?”
He feels Louis’ cheeky smile before he hears his words. “Didn’t send the right vibes.”
“Brat,” he grunts, squeezing Louis against his chest as the omega tries to squirm away. Harry doesn’t let him get far, caging him in his arms where he belongs.
They fall into a comfortable silence, both of them relishing being able to just rest and breathe after weeks of screaming and crying and no sleep or breaks.
“Do you think we’re doing alright?” Louis asks quietly, “With parenting?”
“I think we’re doing amazing,” Harry murmurs, “You’re an amazing mother, baby. Jamie is so lucky.”
“He’s lucky because of you too,” Louis breathes. “Best father.”
“Best parents,” Harry decides, still stroking through Louis’ hair tenderly, “Not perfect, but still the best.”
Louis hums in agreement. “Do you think he’ll take after me or you the most?”
Harry thinks it over carefully. “I have no idea,” is what he settles on. “But I hope he’ll be intelligent and loving like his mother-”
“Strong-willed and determined like his father,” Louis adds.
“A mix of both of us,” Harry says. “But also someone entirely different. His own person.”
“Yes,” Louis agrees, “Ballet dancer or not.”
“Hockey player or not,” Harry adds, grinning.
“We’ll love whoever he grows to be,” Louis finishes. “We love you, Jamie.”
As if hearing his name being uttered, Jamie lets out an ear splitting cry. They groan simultaneously.
“Your turn,” Harry says smugly.
Louis scoffs. “Which one of us had the most sleepless nights over the past ten months?”
Harry rolls his eyes, but he starts getting up anyway. “You can’t keep playing that card,” he grumbles, but they both know Louis will and they both know Harry will let him.
“Love you,” Louis calls, almost being drowned out by the sound of Jamie’s wailing. Harry smiles.
“Love you more,” he yells back, automatically switching into father-mode as he picks Jamie up and coos, rocking him in his arms gently until the sounds subside and he returns to his sleepy state.
“We do love you,” he whispers softly. Jamie blinks, almost as if he heard him. Harry presses a sweet, lingering kiss to his soft forehead, insides fluttering with his emotion for the little pup.
Minutes later, Harry sets a sleeping Jamie back in his crib and stumbles back into his room, collapsing onto the bed and smiling fondly when he sees that Louis is also asleep, mouth slightly open and fingers curled into the sheets in the spot Harry had been laying.
“Goodnight,” he whispers to nobody as he settles in behind Louis to spoon him, pressing a hand flat against the omega’s stomach with vague thoughts of the future flitting across his mind.
-
Epilogue
October 2017
Louis bites his knuckle, heart pounding as he leans forward in his seat in the VIP section to see better. He sucks in a breath as Harry steps out into the ice, crouching low as he reaches his hand back to tug a partly obscured hand.
Jamie comes into view timidly. It’s odd to see him so shy, the young boy is usually so charismatic and confident, borderline cocky.
He takes after his father in more ways than one.
The boy looks adorably small in the oversized hockey uniform and clutching his mini stick, nervous face masked by his chunky helmet. He’s wearing a jersey identical to Harry’s, looking like a mini version of the alpha with his dark short curls and intense look of concentration. But it's Louis’ blue eyes narrowing as Harry tries to tug him through the door. Harry’s teammates cheer them on until Jamie finally obliges.
Harry coaxes him through the gate, squatting down on his skates and taking Jamie’s hands to help him cross over the slight raised bumper so he can enter the ice. The alpha lets go of one hand, guiding a wobbly Jamie even further onto the center line.
Louis clenches his fists, trying to tamp down the worry growing in his stomach. His protective mama bear tendencies as Harry has lovingly dubbed. Next to him, the omegas of Harry’s fellow Capitals teammates do their best to reassure him, reminding him that Harry’s a professional and he’d never let their son get hurt.
He knows that of course, but it doesn’t stop his heart from seizing when Jamie suddenly stumbles, a mess of flailing arms until Harry catches him carefully. He exhales in one long jagged breath, letting some of the tension seep out of him. However, his inner omega is still anxious.
“Well, well, well, ladies and gentlemen,” greets the commentator. “Right now on the ice we’ve got the Capitals’ favorite right winger and beloved Captain, Harry Styles, high off his team’s victory and scoring the leading goal of the game. But he’s not alone. We’ve got a mini hockey legend in our midst everyone! This is Jamie, Styles’ three year old son who looks like he’ll be following in his father’s footsteps in the future.”
Louis smiles despite himself, thinking of how many times Harry has begged Louis to let him teach Jamie how to skate until he obliged. He’s only three years old for god’s sake but Harry was too eager and Louis couldn’t deny him.
And now he’s making his debut in front of thousands of people after the season’s first victory in their annual kick-off game. Louis experienced three of them now, but the thrill and excitement still hasn’t dulled.
The only thing that’s changed over the past three years is that he now has friends, the wives and husbands and occasional girlfriend or boyfriend that he’s in contact with plenty of times over the season making it only rational to befriend one another.
Jenna taps him on the shoulder right then. “Oh my god, Lou! Look at him go!”
Louis grins, feeling some of his uneasiness lift as he sees Harry help Jamie glide across the ice, keeping a firm grip on his small gloved hand.
Jamie’s bashfulness slowly ebbs away until he’s full on grinning, pulling on Harry’s arm and undoubtedly begging to go faster. And of course, because it’s Harry, he indulges him. Louis grimaces, insides twisting with panic as Jamie lets go of Harry’s hand to try and skate by himself.
Harry hovers nearby but Louis is still nervous, especially when Jamie takes a step on his own and immediately teeters. His heart skips a beat, nearly lunging out of his seat right as Jamie finds his balance and rights himself.
“He’s got it,” Jenna assures him. “Harry taught him, didn’t he? You can’t get better lessons than that.”
Louis nods, unable to speak since his heart is clawing up his throat. Again, he knows he can trust Harry. He’s trusted him for years at this point, trusted him with moving to DC, trusted him when the alpha first got overwhelmed with all things hockey and became distant only to find his way back to his boyfriend and son in the end just like Louis knew he would, trusted him when he asked Louis to marry him on December 1st, the anniversary of their first doctor’s appointment together even if Harry claims that was unintentional, trusted him always and that isn’t changing now.
But that doesn’t mean he can’t be nervous.
Jamie is still upright, skating confidently but with wobbly legs. Like Bambi, Louis muses. Harry is grinning as he follows their pup as he gains speed and stability. He looks proud and it makes Louis’ apprehension ease up a bit more too.
“See? He’s doing brilliant,” Jenna says. Next to her, Lana expresses her agreement. She’s not a member of the wives/husbands club but the beta and her boyfriend, the Capitals’ main center wing, have been going pretty steady for close to two years now so Louis figures it’s just a matter of time.
“Yeah, I guess I’ve just been emotional,” Louis brushes off, ignoring their looks of confusion in favor of watching his husband and son skate around, looking giddy and excited. He’s also sore, having visited the studio last night for some extra practice. Yes, he’s found a new dance studio in DC where he goes three to four times a week, participating in the adult advanced classes and occasionally leading some of his own for the younger kids.
On the ice, Harry brings out the puck and Louis groans.
Jamie looks excited through, swinging enthusiastically but much too hard seeing as he trips and Harry catches him, looking undeterred. They practice some more swings until Jamie is able to hit the puck a good ten feet away, cheering excitedly when it happens. Louis’ heart swells at the look of pride and joy on his darling’s face.
Eventually, Harry and Jamie are herded off the ice, waving at Louis from a distance happily. Louis himself stands up, grabbing his bag and thermos and bidding his friends goodbye Most of the audience has left by now, leaving behind the players and their families and friends. Well, and the reporters, one of which corners Louis on his way to meet Harry and Jamie outside the locker room.
“Louis Styles, aka Harry Styles’ omega,” a loud, pushy beta says, shoving a microphone into his face and getting much too close.
Stepping back and placing a protective hand on his stomach, Louis bristles at the reporter. “I prefer, ‘Louis Styles, aka valued editor and journalist for NPR,’” he says annoyedly. “Or, ‘Louis Styles, author of a New York Times bestseller which you can buy at your local bookseller.’ Either works.” He flashes a smile and moves to step away.
“Wait, Mr. Styles,” the reporter continues tenaciously, “You and Captain Styles finally got hitched this past May before honeymooning in Maui. How was the wedding?”
“It was delightful,” Louis says curtly, backing away slowly.
The beta follows him eagerly. “You and Harry have had… somewhat of an unconventional relationship.” Louis stiffens, frowning as the bastard goes on. “Pregnant in college and deciding on co-parenting, then you two started dating. You mated in early 2017 but didn’t get married until over a year later, very interesting indeed.”
Louis scowls. All of what he just said is common information- he and Harry have been pretty open with the fact that they had Jamie young and it was unintended but still one of the best things Louis has ever done. However, he doesn’t like the tone in the beta’s voice, the slight edge of judgement.
He and Harry mated in January of 2017 when they realized they didn’t want to wait for that when it had recently become clear they would have to wait longer for their dream wedding, both of them too busy climbing the ladders of their respective careers.
Louis never saw himself falling into journalism, especially political journalism, but when in DC, he supposes. He’s been awarded many rewards for features, most of them centered around omega rights and other causes close to his heart. Upon the advice and encouragement of his coworkers and colleagues as well as Harry, Zayn, and his other friends and family, he published a book last November which quickly became a bestseller.
When Harry proposed a month later, he hadn’t been expecting it. They were both still so busy and things weren’t going to slow down anytime soon. But Harry realized before he did that there’d never be a perfect time unless they made time.
It felt like a repeat of history, Louis once again falling into his old habits of ignoring all his problems and worries until it became too much. Thankfully, he has an alpha to keep him from getting too carried away just like Harry has Louis to do the same.
They got married in a theatre as per Louis’ wishes and it quickly tied Jamie’s birth as the best day of his life. He remembers the awed and reverent look on Harry’s face when he walked the aisle, clutching his bouquet of white calla lilies, hydrangeas, and baby's breath.
The memory pulls a smile onto his face, as well as the memory of Jamie as their ring bearer, the boy nearly stumbling as he reached the altar but righting himself and flashing the crowd a charming smile so no one noticed his slip.
Harry’s son indeed.
He returns to the moment and the nosy reporter, grimacing. His and Harry’s relationship may have been unconventional when it comes to stereotypical alpha/omega standards, but Louis would have it no other way. He had never been ashamed to show off his bond mark and ringless finger even if that finger is no longer ringless and the same goes for being a young mom.
Before he can open his mouth to tell him that, a familiar and strong arm slides around his waist from behind, tugging him back into a firm chest.
Even after all these years, Harry’s scent still affects him so easily and overwhelmingly. Pine and vanilla comfort pheromones seep into his muscles and course through his veins, urging him to relax because he’s safe.
“Hey, man,” Harry says casually, “We’re not doing interviews today. Have a nice afternoon.” He goes to walk them back and away, only to be interrupted.
“I just wanted to ask some questions to your lovely and beautiful omega,” the beta rushes.
The emphasis on ‘lovely’ and ‘beautiful’ has Harry stopping them in their tracks. Louis stifles a laugh as the betas’ eyes widen, no doubt intimidated by Harry’s possessive glare.
“My lovely and beautiful omega doesn’t want to answer your questions which would have been obvious, you know, had you actually cared,” Harry retorts, “Now if you’ll excuse me, we have to go get dinner with our child.”
The beta sputters his apologies and Harry waves them off, taking Louis’ bag from him and slinging over his shoulder before leading them off to the side where Jamie is high-fiving Harry’s teammates. Harry hoists Jamie up onto his hip and keeps his free arm wrapped tightly around Louis’ waist as they chat with a few people until finally they’re alone again.
“Mommy, was I good?” Jamie asks excitedly, eyes shining with enthusiasm.
Louis smiles fondly, gently taking Jamie onto his own hip while Harry keeps a steadying hand on both of them. “Of course you were, darling. You were a natural,” Louis praises. “Future hockey star just like your dad.”
“Maybe even better than your dad,” Harry adds, looking proud and happy.
Jamie gasps. “That’s impossible!” he whispers, sounding flabbergasted at the idea.
They both chuckle. “We’ll see,” Harry says, letting Louis lean against him. Harry curls them both into a hug. “My loves,” he whispers, pressing a kiss to Louis’ and then to Jamie’s.
Louis feels an uncontrollable burst of happiness ignite inside him and in that moment, he makes a decision. “Harry, can you pull out my water bottle? I need a drink.”
Harry obliges and Louis sets Jamie down so he watches with bated breath as Harry finds the transparent glass water bottle. He studies the alpha’s face as it scrunches up in confusion, and then he watches as the realization settles and Harry’s eyes widen, mouth dropping open in a little o.
“Baby,” he breathes, voice thick with disbelief and reverence as he stares at the banana smoothie. “Sweetheart, is it…?”
“Maybe this one will be a dancer,” Louis whispers, shrieking when Harry scoops him up in a spinning hug, pressing kisses onto every expanse of skin he can reach and murmuring I love yous which Louis returns with no hesitation.
“Mommy, daddy, what’s going on?” Jamie asks, tugging at their shirts impatiently. He’s completely bewildered by the sight of his parents grinning with tears running down their faces.
“Mommy and daddy are very happy right now,” Harry explains, never taking his eyes off of Louis’ face.
“Why?” Jamie asks quickly, tugging harder at his shirt when he doesn’t respond immediately. “Daddy, tell me why!” he begs, eyebrows furrowing and lips pouting adorably.
Harry and him exchange a soft glance before they both squat down, intertwining their fingers and each holding one of Jamie’s hands as well so they’re all connected. The Styles family that Louis once thought he’d never be a part of.
“Jamie, darling, how do you feel about being a big brother?” Louis grins.
Jamie’s answering scream and following celebration dance is enough of an answer. When he’s distracted by his own excitement, Harry tugs Louis into a soft kiss, slotting their lips together and smiling into each other dopily.
“I love you,” Louis says.
“I love you,” Harry echoes, thumbing over his bondmark tenderly. “Always.”
Soon Louis will have three days tied for the best of his life. He still has no idea how he ended up here, but he couldn’t be happier about it.
-
