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Fighting—to Kai it was as natural as breathing. The swing of his fist connecting with something hard, the familiar burn of pain that followed. The adrenaline that drummed beneath his skin, free of all other thoughts. He could feel the power pulsing in his blood. It was exhilarating and Kai loved it.
The dim light of red lanterns shone down on his now bleeding knuckles. He shouldn’t be surprised he ended up here again. Kai dodged a blow and then made another jab at the man, knocking him over. The crowd roared, full as it ever was on a Saturday night. Kai smiled as he won yet another round. He’d promised Lloyd he wouldn’t come back here, but the tavern’s pull was too much.
He couldn’t resist the temptation. The others wouldn’t understand. The swing of a blade, the quick instincts that fueled him, they were what got him there today. They were familiar and fleeting but they powered him. Fighting was ingrained in him, and though peace was a welcome release, it was easy to turn to old habits.
He’d learned early, barely a boy when he’d first fought off bullies for his sister. They had no parents to protect them anymore, so it had to be him. It had felt good to be able to do something, to have situation where he’d been able to make a choice. For once, he’d felt powerful. He wouldn’t let anything happen to Nya if he could help it. He had to be stronger.
And he made sure he was. Working hard in the forge, taking care of most of the chores, walking hours into town in the hot Ignacia sun when they needed something. Supporting two kids in such a village was difficult. It was a constant fight for survival. He didn’t want Nya to have to fight the same battle.
Over the years, his strength grew. He left school and forged weapons full-time; another part of his life centered around fighting. Naturally he picked up some things about how to wield a sword from what his parents had left. It made for better sales if he could tell it would be good in battle.
And given what some of his customers were involved in, (honest farmers didn’t need thatmany swords) it was good to know how to defend himself if necessary. Only a skinny underfed kid standing between them and shiny steel sometimes looked like too much of a deal. Kai didn’t want to repeat how he got his scar.
After that, he started teaching Nya to fight too. He never wanted her to have to learn but at least it would keep her safe. They would spar every so often, in the snatches of time after the shop closed and she was done with homework. Nya was a fast learner and soon enough they had fair fights. They were both still learning though and that’s what Kai feared. What if it wasn’t enough?
He had to protect her; he’d made that promise to mom and dad, that he would take care of her no matter what. So, when she was taken by the skeletons, it was everything he feared. He fought and he still wasn’t strong enough to save her. He drove himself into a single-minded fury, training harder than ever before, angry and impatient. He still didn’t trust Sensei Wu or the others; they didn’t understand how hard he’d fought for the life he’d had with Nya. All he cared about was getting her back.
But they did find her, and Kai found a new life among the ninjas. Finally, he’d found what he was meant to do. That there really was more for him in life than just surviving. That belief, that newfound purpose powered him. He trained harder and honed his skills. He felt stronger than ever before, no need to fear the weakness of the past. Especially with his powers.
Needless to say, he was disappointed when he wasn’t the green ninja. But he found it in him to fight to protect and teach Lloyd like he did with Nya all those years ago. Duty towards Lloyd and the team carried him forwards in his new life. It was hard work being a ninja, but it paid off well, getting to see his team and world in one piece. And of course, Kai didn’t mind the fame. It felt nice to be appreciated.
But it didn’t last.
Of course, it didn’t. He was so stupid. When you fight enough battles, you’re bound to lose one. Well, they didn’t quite lose, Zane made sure of that, but they didn’t win either. Without him, there was no team. Kai was once so comfortable in going it alone, now he couldn’t imagine the team or the world without him. It just felt wrong.
So, when things fell apart, Kai fell back to what he was good at. The slice of his sword, metal against skin, the physical pain, it grounded him. Distracted him from everything that happened. He found a tavern at the edge of Ninjago City that could keep its mouth shut. Had too anyway with what most of the other patrons were involved in. Kai didn’t care. Everything that mattered was gone, his brothers split apart. Worst of all, he knew it wouldn’t be like this if it was him in Zane’s place. It should’ve been.
It burned him up inside that he didn’t act then. But there was nothing he could do to go back, to fix anything. Rage accompanied him to the fights, and he wielded it like a double-edged sword, both for attack and for being too careless on defense. What were another few scars, a couple more bruises? It wasn’t like he didn’t deserve it.
Eventually, he tried to let himself forget. Kai let his confidence grow as he won fights, gaining scars and the adoration of the crowd. It felt good to lose himself in the haze of pain and adrenaline. He even went so far as to try the drinks at the tavern, they certainly seemed to help. He fed off the energy surrounding him, the rush of the fight, leaving him in a daze. It even helped push away the guilt whenever Lloyd showed up. It was easy that all he had to worry about was winning. It was easy to lose himself in the fight. But that didn’t last either and soon Kai was thrust into a much larger battle, the tournament.
The tournament went like all their adventures seem to go. They fought, they struggled, and eventually things worked out. Luckily this time, they regained a member. Though they still lost another, Lloyd’s father. It hurt to see Lloyd so upset, and guilt clawed its way back into Kai’s chest. Thoughts of the staff and all that power he held, how he let it consume him.
He almost hurt Lloyd.
And then he hurt him in the end anyways. Questions constantly nagged him. Maybe if he hadn’t let himself be controlled, they could’ve stopped Chen then, before they took Skylor, before the Anacondrai, and before Garmadon made the sacrifice. Kai couldn’t stop thinking about it. He failed them again.How was he so stupid that he didn’t think he’d be weak to something as powerful as the staff?
Kai’s time in the slither pit itched at the back of his mind. He grew restless as they put together the new tea shop. The tournament and all his mistakes filled his head in the monotony. Even training more didn’t help. He needed release. He needed to fight.
Kai kept the urge hidden. The others wouldn’t understand, they all had something else. Jay and Nya had their inventing and building, Zane had his cooking, Cole had his sweets, and Lloyd had his candy and new leading role. Kai had nothing, only what he’d been doing his whole life. He threw all of his energy into it. Every training session, every battle, every spare moment. It still wasn’t enough. In his worst moments he longed to return to the pit and lose himself in it again. For now, much to his family’s dismay, he settled for launching himself into battle without a care. He took the hits, made a run for that risky blow. Kai would do anything if it was him in danger instead of them. It should’ve been him all those times.
But even then, when it counted, he was useless.
He couldn’t save Lloyd. Morro took him away right in front of his eyes. Kai had tried everything and still it wasn’t enough. He had to watch his little brother be used and all of his skills, his rage, couldn’t help save him. Guilt stabbed at him throughout their search for the tomb and after. Even when Lloyd was free, Kai could tell it had hurt him badly. Just like before. Just like before, Kai had failed him again. After all the weeks of ignoring the itch, of filling his time with training and the tea shop, he finally caved. So that’s where he went; to do the only thing he knew how.
The slither pit welcomed him back with open arms.
Kai relished in the energy of the place, chasing away guilt with another round in the pit or another glass. He knew it wasn’t right or “healthy”, but nothing else felt the same. Nowhere else could he get the same freedom. Being here just took his mind off things. He could lose himself in the violence and the pain, feel the hum of his body and nothing else. With every new bruise, every hit landed, Kai felt alive. And best of all, there were no high stakes that the world would end if he failed, no siblings in danger, just himself ready to win.
Kai entered the ring again with a crack of his knuckles, fingers rubbing against dried blood. He winked at the crowd’s cheers, waiting for the next opponent to enter. A knife thrown from the sidelines marked the next battle and left a red line dripping from his arm. The wound stung but it was nothing new. A green serpentine stepped into the ring. Kai smirked, drawing his own blade.
Kai fought. After all, there was nothing he knew better.