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Notes:

It's been awhile since I've written anything and this is one of two poems I've written to get my anger and frustration out on a horrible parent in my life: MY FATHER. As of late, he has been a total disgrace-he doesn't do anything with his family, he watches the same stuff on eternal loop for years, he doesn't do much around the house, and he only helps with business stuff-BUT NEVER THE EMOTIONAL DEPARTMENT.

On sunday, HE NEARLY RUINED THE positive and happy flow of my convention weekend by being a jackass and pissing me off when he talked smack about mom and other crap. You will not believe how mad I was when I told him off in the car when he was taking me downtown. Thankfully, the convention's pure blissful atmosphere chased away the negative energy that dared to cling to my energy.

Ever since Sunday, I've had a lot of reflection on my relationship with my father even BEFORE that. During the past 2 years since the Pandemic even perhaps before that-A LOT OF skeletons have come out of the closet about my father and I was even in therapy for awhile to deal with my mix emotions regarding him and how he has made my mother feel and the state of the family.

HE'S A LAZY, GOOD for nothing S.O.B.! HE has no regard for others' emotions, he can't accept people for who they are, he can't even take criticism when somebody is standing up to tell him off! MY FATHER IS A Narcissist! He only thinks of himself! He thinks the world revolves around him, he thinks he's all that and a bag of chips and thinks he knows it all! WELL HE DOESN'T! He's a liar, a thief, a manipulative jerk! AND YA WANNA KNOW WHY he thinks his kids show no respect for him-BECAUSE HE DOESN'T RESPECT HIS FAMILY OR THE OFFSPRING HE MADE!

I'm tired of his attitude, I'm tired of his deceit, I'm tired of the lies and bull shit he tried to shove in my brain for years-trying to make me turn on my mother and believe all his crap! I'm tired to have to say sorry to him because ya know what!? I DON'T FEEL SORRY FOR WHAT I SAID TO HIM SUnday! I don't feel sorry for having to stand up for myself! I DON'T FEEL SORRY TELLING MY PIECE OF MIND! I don't feel sorry at all nor feel pity on him!

This poem along with another is my declaration of my disconnection to my father! He maybe my father, he maybe family, but when ya got someone toxic in your blood line-ITS OKAY TO cut ties! He can keep helping me with other stuff, he can keep taking me to work at times, BUT THAT'S IT! HE ONLY DOES THE BUSINESS STUFF! He doesn't know jack crap about the emotional department!

His hugs are hollow and cold, his words are rubble and crumbly like crumbs, his presence is putrid and disgusts me just looking at him! HE THINKS that if ya don't expect anything, your never disappointed! HE THINKS HE cannot redeem himself because he's too old! HE THINKS ITS TOO LATE TO CHANGE OR FIX THINGS! WHAT KIND OF CRAP IS THAT!? WELL I AM THROUGH WITH HIS ATTITUDE AND HIS WHOLE BEING!

As of today-THE MAN WHO WAS ONCE MY FATHER, HE IS nothing, but a MOOCHER mooching around our house! I've given him many chances, but he failed each one without even trying to fix things! SO FATHER, I BID FAREWELL TO YOU BECAUSE AS OF TODAY-I CUT YOU OFF EMOTIONALLY!