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Prologue: Welcome Back Despair!!!
???: …
???: …Huh, where am I?
(I woke up in a dark room completely alone)
???: What is this place?
???: It looks like a classroom, but I don’t remember a classroom in Lunanova that looks like this?
???: Professor Ursala, Lotte, Sucy, Diane, is anyone there?
???: Huh… What is this?
(I picked up a piece of paper on one of the desks, I thought it might have some information on what is going on here?)
???: What is this, Akko Kagari, Ultimate Witch Student?
Akko: Ultimate??? Witch Student???
Akko: WHAT!!!!! WHAT THE HECK IS AN ULTIMATE? AND WHY AM I THE ULTIMATE WITCH STUDENT AND NOT JUST THE ULTIMATE WITCH??? Aw…
(I slucked for a second but I didn’t let that distract me, I gave another quick look around the room, it looked like the windows were covered up with metal plates and there were monitors and cameras everywhere?)
Akko: Maybe I should get out of this classroom and see where exactly I am?
(I ran to open the door to the classroom when I suddenly bumped into something or more specifically, someone.)
???: Ow!!!
Akko: Oh my god, I’m so sorry, I should’ve been watching where I was going!
(I looked at who I bumped into and I saw what looked like to be a teenaged boy with red hair, some kind of school uniform, and kinda creepy looking eyes)
???: Nah, don’t worry it’s fine, trust me I know a lot of people that can hurt me even more than you and your weak little shove.
Akko: H-Hey I’m not weak, who do you think you are?
???: Who am I? My name is Karma Akabane, and according to this paper I’m the Ultimate Assassin.
Akko: K-Karma? What kind of name is that?
Karma: I could ask you the same question? I mean what kind of name is Akko?
Akko: HEY! It’s a completely normal name!
Karma: Whatever, anyways…
Karma: Who the hell are you and where are we?
Akko: I don’t know? I just woke up in this classroom with this piece of paper saying that I'm the ultimate witch student.
???: Hold up… that happened to you two as well?
(I heard a voice and when I turned around to see who it was, I saw two people, well… one looked like a medium sized human with green hair and the other one looked like their head was in the shape of a cup?)
???: Ay… look Leaf Head, we have a wannabe witch and a red headed looking pimp!
Karma: The fuck did you just say to me you little shit!!!!
???: C-Calm down sunshine, we don’t want to start a fight?
Akko: W-Wait, you guys also woke up in a classroom alone with a paper with your quote on quote Ultimate talent?
???: Yeah, oh I’m so sorry, we never introduced ourselves!
???: Hello there Sunshine, I’m Herb Cookie, the Ultimate Gardener.
???: Jezz, I just call you Leaf Head, Leaf Head!
Karma: Okay and what's your name you little shit!
???: Well my name is Cuphead that stupid piece of paper said I'm the Ultimate Gambler!!!
Akko: Well it's nice to meet you. My name is Akko. I'm apparently the Ultimate Witch Student and this is um.. Karma the Ultimate Assassin.
Karma: uh uh… Cuphead, got it, you’re officially on my shit list!!!!
Cuphead: Well right at Ya Tomato Head!
Karma: Call me one more nickname and you won’t have a neck anymore, GOT IT!!!!
Herb: C-Calm down Sunshine, we still need to figure out the situation we're in!
Akko: Y-Yeah, Mr. Herb Cookie’s right! We shouldn't be fighting. We should be trying to understand our situation!
Herb: Please Sunshine, you can just call me Herb if that’s easier!
Akko: Oh ok, that’s way easier, ok thanks Herb!!!
Herb: Ok, well now that we are all acquainted, can we please try and figure out our situation!
Karma: The little green cookie is right. I mean the sooner we figure out our situation the quicker we can get out of here.
Cuphead: So let me get this straight. You guys woke up in a strange classroom alone With this piece of paper and phone thing in your pocket?
Akko: W-What weird phone thing?
Karma: You didn't get one? There's this weird phone thing in our pockets.
Akko: There is?
(I quickly rummaged around in my pockets and just like they said there was a weird phone looking thing in my pocket that said something weird on the back?)
Akko: Student E-Handbook? What is this?
(I opened the E-Handbook and a bunch of tabs opened up, I was curious so I clicked on the one that said map)
Akko: So… wait? This is a school?
???: Amazing!!! These “E-Handbooks” are amazing!!!!
Akko: AHHH!!!
(A weird voice startled me, but when I looked around me I couldn't see anyone?)
???: Uh, hello! Down here!
Akko: AH!!!!
Herb: By golly, you're almost as short as me?
Cuphead: Yeah, now Leaf Head over here has a shorty twin!
???: Hey!!! I take offense to that!!!
Akko: Um, I hate to interrupt, but who or what are you?
???: Oh, I’m terribly sorry, allow me to introduce myself!!
???: My name is Fan, as you can see, I am a fan, this piece of paper says that I’m the Ultimate Blogger!!!
Fan: It’s nice to meet you all!!!
Akko: I think I must be dreaming? I mean, I’ve seen animals talk before and I’ve even flown on a broom before, but I’ve never seen an object straight up talk and move by itself?
Cuphead: Nope this isn’t a dream, I see Paper Brain walking and talking to.
Fan: Paper Brain!!!! I take extra offense to that!!!
Akko: I think I need someone to pinch or slap me to wake me up!
(And as soon as I said that, I felt something cold and hard slap my.. Uh… Bottom back area?)
Akko: OWWWWWW!!!!!
???: See, you're awake!!!
(I turned around again to see a tall man with a green shirt, blue pants, and major lack of hair?)
Karma: Hitting a girl's ass with a wooden ruler, not cool man?
Akko: IS THAT WHAT HIT ME!!!!!
Fan: Um… who are you?
???: Oh, I guess I should introduce myself to all of you students?
???: Hi, my name is Baldi, that’s me, and I’m the Ultimate Math Teacher!!!
Cuphead: Pfft… No way your name is actually Baldi, “Baldi”!
Baldi: But it is! That’s my name, Baldi!
Cuphead: Come on, how am I supposed to come up with a stupid nickname for Ya if you already have a name as stupid as Baldi?
Karma: Says the guy with a cup on his head whose name is literally Cuphead.
Cuphead: Shut up Strawberry Head!!!
Akko: Anyways, why did you slap my butt with that ruler?
Baldi: I thought you said that you wanted someone to slap you?
Akko: On the wrist or cheek, not my butt!
Baldi: Oh… Well next time, specify!!!
Herb: I don’t think hitting a stranger, specifically a girl, anywhere is okay.
Karma: Putting this aside, can we explore more of this place so we can find a way out? We've been standing here for how long and my legs are starting to fall asleep.
Akko: Oh… Sorry Karma, I guess we could investigate some more?
Herb: Um, may I come with you?
Akko: Sure Herb, the more the merrier!
(Me, Karma, and Herb split up from Cuphead, Fan, and Baldi to explore more of this place to find a way out. We then entered a place that said “store” on it.)
Akko: H-Huh??? There’s a store here? I thought this place was supposed to be a school judging by the classroom and interior of the place? So why is there a store here?
Herb: Why don’t we find out!
(With a bright smile on his face, Herb opened the door that said store on it and when he opened the doors, we saw two more eh-people?)
???: I told you, I ain’t selling that faulty product!!!
???: Oh come on, all I ask is for you to sell this product in your stores for about ten thousand bells!!!
???: First off, I don’t know what bells are, second, if your so-called “bells” are the equivalent to dollars, then you want me to buy this rusted shovel off of you to sell in my stores, for ten thousand dollars!
???: So… what’s the problem?
???: Oh my god, you are such a greedy little rat!
???: Actually, I’m a tanuki.
Herb: U-Um, excuse me, sorry to interrupt.
???: Huh??? Well look at this, more open wal- er- I mean customers.
Akko: Cu-Customers?
???: Don’t buy anything from him, he’ll just scam you of all of your money!
Karma: Hey man, that is my job, who do you think you are?
???: Who am I? My name is Nook, Tom Nook, I’m the Ultimate Entrepreneur!!!
Mr. Nook: But just call me Mr. Nook!
Herb: Greetings Mr. Nook, and who’s this fine specimen next to you?
???: Huff… do I really need to tell you who I am?
Akko: I mean… it would be nice to at least know your name and talent, good sir.
???: G-Good Sir?!?!?
Akko: D-Did I say something wrong?
???: You sure did!!! If you really want to know who I am, then I'll tell you!!!
???: My name is Lollipop, the Ultimate Saleswoman!!!
Akko: Saleswoman??? Wait, that means…
Lollipop: Yes, I’m a girl!!!!
Akko: Oh my god, I’m so sorry! It’s just your voice is just so monotone and a bit deep that it sounded like you were a boy.?.?
Lollipop: It’s fine, just don’t forget that I’m a girl okay?
Akko: Got it, MS. Lollipop.
Lollipop: Just Lollipop is fine.
Mr. Nook: SOOO… Can we get back to business Ms. Lollipop?
Lollipop: Are you still wanting me to buy that shovel for me to sell? The answer is still, NO!!!
Herb: Um…Maybe we should leave before a fight breaks out?
(I nodded in agreement and me, Karma, and Herb all left the store before we got involved in their argument.)
Karma: Those were certainly some interesting characters?
Akko: Yeah, and I thought some of my friends were weird?
Herb: Well then, shall we keep exploring?
Akko: Sure!!! Where to next?
Karma: How about that room across from us to the right?
Akko: Okay, let’s go!
(We went to the room Karma pointed to that said, “Broadcasting Room”, and when we entered, we saw two more people in the room, however…)
???: Ahh… I told you to get the hell away from me you monster!!!
???: Aw… Sis, your screaming in fear just makes me want to be with you more!!!
???: Eh… Just get away from me!!!! I don’t care if this is heaven or hell, but whatever afterlife this is I’ll make sure I never see you ag-
Akko: Um… Excuse me?
(When we walked into the Broadcasting Room, we saw two girls in pink and purple pigtails who looked almost identical to each other.)
???: Th-There are more people here?!?! Oh thank god!!! Please help me!!!
(One of the girls ran behind me and hugged me tightly like she was afraid of the other girl?)
???: Oh come on sis! Stop hiding behind this stupid bitch like a meat shield and come to me!!!
Akko: EXCUSE ME!!!!!!
???: N-no!!! I thought when I died, I would go to heaven and you would go to hell, but now I’m stuck here in afterlife with-
Karma: Um, excuse me, are you insinuating that you and your sister died or something?
???: Y-Yeah!!! She forced me to help kill my best friend and both me and her died shortly after that!!!
???: Oh come on sis, stop living in the past, the Cyclopes Billiards Bitch, got on my nerves anyway, thinking she could touch my precious little Hibiki!!!
Karma: I hate to break it to Ya miss little sis, but this isn’t the afterlife, you’re very much alive.
???: W-what!!! I’m alive!!!
Akko: Yeah, now let’s just calm down and both of you tell us your names and talents.
???: O-oh, okay!!! I’m Hibiki Otonokoji and I’m the Ultimate Vocalist!!!
Karma: Aaand who’s the girl who looks exactly like you that has a look of blood lust in her eyes?
???: Oh well my name is Kanade Otonokoji, and I’m the Ultimate Guitarist- Pft, yeah that’s a fucking lie I’m actually the Ultimate Murdurous Fiend!!!
Akko: U-Ultimate Murderous Fiend!?!?!
Karma: Why do you look so shocked? I mean, I’m the Ultimate Assassin?
Akko: Y-Yeah but, she doesn’t look like the type to be a serial killer?
Karma: Are you sure about that? Yo, Miss Little Sis, what’s your body count?
Kanade: Well, I started killing at the age of three, and even though I don’t keep track of all the people I’ve killed, I’d say that my body count is in the sixties.
Akko: SIXTY’S!!!!!
Herb: JESUS SUNSHINE!!!!
Karma: Oookay, you win, my body count is around two or three?
Kanade: Then how the fuck are you the “ULTIMATE” Assassin?
Karma: That’s none of your business!!!
Kanade: Whatever, I have business to attend to! Come here my precious Hibiki!!!
Hibiki: N-No, stay away from me you psychopath of a sister!!!!
(Hibiki ran out of the Broadcasting Room with Kanade following her in hot pursuit.)
Akko: …
Herb: …
Karma: Well, those two seem really weird!
Herb: Y-Yeah, but I wonder what Hibiki meant by, “We should be dead”?
Karma: I don’t know? Let’s just ignore it for now and just keep on exploring.
Akko: G-Good idea.
(We left the Broadcasting Room, we kept looking around and passed by a room with a big metal door and a room that said “Infirmary”, we kept walking and we eventually made our way to the Gym, where we saw three more people.)
???: Um, girls? How much longer am I going to sit like this? Shouldn’t we be exploring?
???: Look, I’m a bit stressed out right now, and when I feel stressed out, painting a picture of someone calms me down a bit.
???: And I’m just drawing because I’m bored.
???: Huff- fine, just try and be a bit quicker okay?
Akko: Um, hello?
???: Oh look, more people, maybe we should take a break and say hi?
???: Okay, fine.
(The three girls got up and put down the things in their hand and walked over to say hi, and I have to say, these girls looked actually normal! The one who was drawing with paint and paper had long messy pink hair and was wearing a blue apron. The one who was drawing with a digital pen and tablet had long brown hair, was wearing a purple shirt, and whose face was… white? And the one who was sitting in the chair looked like just a normal girl with a brown ponytail and beige jacket.)
???: Now then, shall we introduce ourselves? I’ll go first!
???: My name is Nao Egokoro, and I’m the Ultimate Artist!!!
Akko: Ultimate Artist, that’s a really cool talent!!!!
Nao: Thanks, I appreciate it!!!
???: Okay, I’ll go next. My name is Jaiden, I also go by my YouTube name “Jaiden Animations” as well, I’m the Ultimate Animator!!!
Karma: Does that mean you're famous or something? Because, I’ve never heard of you before!
Jaiden: Well, I mean, I’m an animator who sits at her desk animating stories for like ten million people to see, but I don’t see myself as someone famous, I just see myself as someone who makes goofy videos for everyone to enjoy!
Herb: That’s an amazing mindset Sunshine!!!
Jaiden: Aw, thanks!!!
Akko: And what about you Ms.…
???: Oh, that’s right, I’m Katie Forester, and apparently, I’m the Ultimate Average!!!
Akko: Ultimate… Average???
Karma: How the fuck can being average be some sort of “Ultimate Talent”?
Katie: Yeah, I don’t really get it either?
Nao: I mean look at it this way, at least you're probably the most normal one here!
Katie: Yeah, I guess you’re right Nao, thanks.
Nao: You’re welcome, now can we get back to me and Jaiden drawing you?
Katie: Fffine….
Jaiden: Sorry Katie, we’ll be done soon though!
Akko: Okay well, it was nice meeting you three, see you gals soon!!!
(The three of us waved goodbye to Nao, Jaiden, and Katie and left the Gym, the only place we really haven’t gone to besides the infirmary is that big room with the metal door, so the three of us made our way to that room and we saw two more strange looking characters)
???: Oh, my, gosh, why can’t you open this door, it looks like it would be easy to open!!!
???: If it’s so easy then why don’t you do it?
???: WHAT WAS THAT?!?!?!?!
???: N-Nothing… Just give me a little more time okay…
???: Pfft… Whatever!!!
Karma: Um… Hello there?
???: Huh? Oh great, more idiots!!!!
Karma: Oh, I already don’t like you, you little blue bitch!!!
???: C-Calm down, let’s not get in a fight please.
Herb: That boy over there is right, let’s not start conflict, Karma!
Karma: Pfft, she started it.
???: What!!!
Akko: Please everyone, let’s just calm down and introduce ourselves, okay.
???: Great idea, I’ll go first, my name is Magolor, and I’m the Ultimate Researcher, I hope we can be great friends!!!
Karma: Good, good, now, who is this little blue bitch next to you!!!
???: If you must know, I’m Aquamarine, the Ultimate Kidnapper!!!!
Karma: I see, so you’re the one who kidnapped us, okay! Can someone hand me a knife?
Herb: Calm down Sunshine!
Aquamarine: Only a hooligan like you would think someone of my size could kidnap so many people!!!
Magolor: I mean, you are the Ultimate Kidnapper.
Aquamarine: SHUT UP YOU IDIOTIC CHILD!!!!!!
Magolor: AHHHHH!!!!!
Akko: Hey, leave him alone you bully!!!!
Aquamarine: What did you say you little-
*BING*BONG*DING*DONG*
(All of a sudden one of the monitors in the room started to turn on and what appeared on the monitor was…)
???: Ehemm!!! This is a school announcement!!! Everyone please report to the Gym immediately for a very special pep rally!!! So don’t be late!!!
(The monitor then turned off leaving the five of us in the room confused?)
Magolor: W-What was that?
Aquamarine: Don’t know, don’t care! Let’s just get back to trying to open this door!!!
Herb: But shouldn’t we do what that voice said, I mean, what if this “pep rally” explains why we’re here?
Akko: Herb is right! Come you four, let’s go back to the Gym, maybe now we’ll get some answers!!!
Karma: I’m cool with that, come on let’s get stepping!!!
(After Karma said that me, Karma, Herb, Magolor, and Aquamarine all started to make their way to the Gym. Once we got there, the other ten people we’ve already met were there as well. Waiting to see what that announcement was all about?)
Fan: So does anyone know what this pep rally is about?
Cuphead: I’m pretty sure none of us know what this is about yet Paper Brain!!!
Fan: Can you please stop calling me that?
Lollipop: Hopefully that voice will tell us how to get out of this place.
Mr. Nook: I hope so, I got wares to sell, I don’t have time for these stupid little games!
Baldi: Maybe it was the principle on the loudspeaker?
Nao: P-Principle?
Katie: What do you mean by principle?
Baldi: Well, this is a school, right?
Jaiden: It seems to look that way.
Baldi: So obviously, there has to be a principle somewhere in this place, right?
Hibiki: Y-yeah, maybe you’re right?
Kanade: ...
Karma: Hey, psycho!!! What are you thinking?
Kanade: Oh nothing, this just seems a bit familiar to me, that’s all.
Akko: Familiar how?
???: Why don’t you wait and find out?
Akko: H-Huh?
Aquamarine: Oi, you little cry baby, stop making voices already!!!
Magolor: That wasn’t me?
???: Nope, it was ME!!!!
(We all turned to the direction of the main stage where the strange voice seemed to be coming from, and when we did, we saw…)
???: Ehem… Greetings students, is everyone here good now let’s get-
???: …
???: WAIT A MINUTE? HOW MANY OF YOU ARE HERE?
Jaiden: W-What the hell are you?
???: I’LL ANSWER THAT IN A MINUTE, JUST ANSWER THE GODDAMN QUESTION!!!!
Baldi: Well, including me, there are fifteen of us.
Herb: Wait? Why are you asking?
???: Goddammit! We’re missing one!!!
Akko: Wait? There’s someone else here?
(Just as I said that the doors to the Gym opened and a teenage looking boy with orange hair, a purple and black vest, and purple and black headphones walked into the Gym.)
???: …
???: YOU’RE LATE GOOD SIR!!!! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
???: Sorry, I was sleeping in the Infirmary.
???: Hff, well you’re here now so we can begin this announcement.
Akko: Hold on wait!
???: Ugg, what is it now?!?!
Akko: That boy over there, what’s his name and talent?
???: Oh, he never introduced himself?
Karma: No, he hasn't.
???: Well in that case, chop chop, introduce yourself Phones?
???: …
???: Neku Sakuraba…
Herb: And your talent?
Neku: I don’t have one, my paper just had question marks on it?
Baldi: Welllll Greatttt! That makes sixteen of us now!!!
Cuphead: Yeah, Yeah, whatever, anyways. WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU, AND WHY ARE WE HERE!!!!!!
???: Oh right, I never introduced myself because “Phones” over there was late!!!
???: Anyways, my name is Monokuma, and I am this school’s headmaster!!!!
Katie: Well, I guess you were right Baldi, it was the principle?
Baldi: WOW, I EXIST!!!!!
Monokuma: Yeah whatever, anyways to answer your second question, the reason you are all here is to play a game!!!!
Fan: Um… A game???
Kanade: This seems really familiar???
Neku: Not going to lie, same?!!?
Hibiki: H-Hey, don’t agree with her, she’s a psychopath, she’ll probably kill you next!!!
Neku: I’ve faced more than psychopathic bitches!!!
Kanade: I’m just going to ignore that, anyways, I feel like I know where this is going!!!!
Akko: You do?
Monokuma: If you all will Finally shut up, then I can Finally tell you all the game you’re going to be playing!!!!
Herb: Okay fine, so, what game will we be playing then?
Monokuma: A KILLING GAME!!!!!!!!!
Akko: A-A what??!?!?!
(We were all waiting to see if he was kidding, but I think he was dead serious!!!)
Jaiden: What?!?!?
Lollipop: A killing game??!?!
Kanade: Called it!
Hibiki: WHAT, NO NOT AGAIN, I WON’T DIE AGAIN, ARE YOU RELATED TO MONOCROW SOMEHOW?!?!?!??!
Karma: Wait, again? Do you know what’s going on?
Kanade: Shut the fuck up Hibiki!!!!
Monokuma: Anyways, let me explain, you all are stuck here in this school for the rest of your Lifes!!!
Jaiden: Oh God, I hate school, I can’t live here forever!!!!
Nao: Ye-Yeah, we all have friends and family to return to!!!
Monokuma: Don’t worry, there is one way one of you can leave.
Mr. Nook: And that is?
Monokuma: Kill someone!!!!
Akko: WHAT!!!!
Magolor: No way, I’m not killing anyone!!!
Monokuma: Well, sucks to suck, that’s the only way to leave this place, and once the killer kills someone, they have to get away with it in a class trial!!!
Katie: Tr-Trial??
Monokuma: Let me explain!!!
Monokuma: The goal of Class Trials is for the students to uncover the "Blackened", the student who has, either voluntarily or involuntarily, murdered another student as part of the mutual Killing Game. During the Class Trial, they oppose all the other students, who are known as the "Spotless". The students determine who they believe is guilty by participating in a vote at the end of the trial. If the Blackened aka, “The Killer” are found guilty, they will be executed by Monokuma and the Killing Game will continue, but if the students find the wrong student guilty then every student except the Blackened will be executed and the Blackened will be allowed to leave. Participating in Class Trials is mandatory for all students alive at the time. Students who have been murdered or executed prior to the trial are represented in the courtroom in portraits displayed on stands at the student's former podium.
Monokuma: Soooo, what do you think?!?!?
Aquamarine: This is complete hogwash, what makes you think any of us will play this stupid game?
Monokuma: Oh trust me, this has happened before, and honestly, I’m getting tired of the whole, “We won’t kill crap”, but anyways, that’s it for this pep rally, everyone, please make your way to the dormitory area of the school, just check your map and go to your rooms for now, adios, toddles!!!
Akko: He-he can’t be serious, right?
Karma: I think he is.
Neku: Well, if that’s done with, let’s just go to these so called dorms and sleep on this for now, and tomorrow we’ll think of a game plan.
Aquamarine: Since when were you the leader?
Neku: I’m not, I’m just making a suggestion.
(Thoughts flooded through my mind as I looked around at the people in the Gym)
(I realized that I knew no one here, everyone is a complete stranger to me, some of them seem nice, but will we all resist the temptation of murder just to escape, and if someone does die and we need to go through one of those Class Trial thingies? Who is going to live, who is going to die, and most importantly, will we be able to survive?)
Prologue: Welcome Back Despair!!!
END