Archive of Our Own ^beta

Her past was just like shadow — no matter how fast she would run, memories were always right behind her. Nightmares of things that are stuck in her mind, no matter what. Some people have it easy, some just don't. Life full of tears, screams and assurance that she's nobody to everyone. She has no worth, no purpose, that she's impossible to love.

Every day was a fight, but she was losing, even before the start. She didn't know how it is to truly smile, laugh or simply — how to be happy. Constantly told to shut up, to go away, to not take others space. She was alone, too scared to reach for help. Abused by the only person she had, she was silent, because she couldn't lose her, no matter how hard it was.

Maybe she was hurting, being hit hard almost everyday, but who would care? Maybe she was coming home to smell of alcohol and ciggarets but it was fine. Maybe she was trying to hide her scars, but who would notice anyway? Maybe she was dirty, but no one even tried to understand why. Maybe her heart was broken all this time, but there wasn't anybody to care about it. About her.

She was tired, very tired. At some point, waking up became the biggest nightmare. The struggle was real, but should she care about it? Other kids were just passing by, forgeting her name. She didn't try to smile or play happy, her life wasn't worth trying. All she ever deserved was pain, nothing more.

Then if she knew that, what really broke her? Maybe it was this growing pain in her chest, maybe those little dreams where she was something more than just this lonely burden. Or maybe it was the day when her mother figure told her that she never loved her. She heard a lot of times that she doesn't matter, that she shouldn't be born, but somehow this was too much for her.

She was ready for another punch, another scream but this time there was nothing. She just told Catra to go away and never come back. That's it.

So she did as she was told. She walked away, spending many hours roaming the streets. Finally she stopped, halfway through the bridge, letting her weak tears fall dawn the sidewalk. In this moment she had enough, she was too tired to come back, too tired to run away, too tired to stay.

Looking down at the river, everything seemed to look different. Maybe tomorrow, after this she would finally wake up happy. Without feeling like oxygen isn't something for her.

It was getting dark, less more cars driving through. She had no idea, how long she was standing here, trying to find another life on the other side of this stupid river. She was ready.

But then suddenly she wasn't alone. Unfamilliar warmth of another human appeared next to her. She looked to the side, where the person stood, quickly noticing young, blonde girl.

"It's beautiful from up here." She said, looking at Catra with little smile on her face.

Catra had no idea what just happened, or why it was happening but she couldn't look away from the stranger girl. She knew there were still tears in her eyes, pain on her face, but the blonde didn't ask questions. She just was there. Like she knew, even if it was impossible for her to read Catra's mind.

"Though it's even better in the morning, just when the sun goes up" she continued.

In this little smile was something she needed to see. Maybe it sounds stupid, but it was true.

"I'm Adora, by the way" she added after a while, pulling her hand in Catra's side.

"Catra" she said, just a little bit louder than a whisper.

She wanted to ask why the girl is here. Why she decided to say anything to her. But she already knew the answer, even if she wouldn't said it out loud.

"Do you mind if i stay here with you for a little while? I don't want to go back yet" Adora said and Catra just nooded.

Both of them knew, what happend that day but they didn't want to name it for a long time. But one thing was certain for Catra — this day she met her purpose. Her guardian angel showed up and just stayed with her. From now on everything could be perfect, because maybe she finally wasn't alone.

Cold pain stopped being so hard to handle. When Adora was close, warm spread through her heart. Something she never felt before.

That day they stayed there the entire night, just watching stars mirrored in the river. Talking little from time to time. But for Catra it was enough to forget about bad things at least for one night. When the sun started rising, another life just began.

Sitting next to blonde stranger, watching sunset together was a fresh start for her, and this time she didn't mean to lose before trying.

Everything could be perfect, because she finally found her guardian angel.

And when the sun was high enough, Adora was ready to come back home, but at the same moment, Catra was hit by the truth — she didn't have anywhere to go. Sure, it was stupid to just walk behind the blonde girl, but after this night, she couldn't lose her.

When they both stopped, Catra finally said that she can't go home, because she no longer has one. Later that day, Adora knew everything, and promised to help her somehow. All really could be perfect, right?

—

But it wasn't. Not entirely at least.

At first everything seemed to find it's proper way. After telling her story of abuse, Adora told her about different ways to help her get free. Few months later, Catra was on the right road to happiness, living in child care home, until she turned eighteen. She still had Adora on her side, holding her hand, whenever she needed it.

First time in her life she was finally feeling alive. Stupid jokes made by Adora always caused smile on her face — something she didn't knew existed. After coming back from school she wasn't beaten or screamed at. It was silent, peaceful. She was getting closer with Adora everyday, missing her after seconds apart.

But this didn't mean she forgot all the pain. Even if now was alright, past wasn't that colorful. Nightmares were constantly haunting her almost every night. She was waking up, all sweaty with tears in her eyes, afraid that all this happiness was just a dream, and the reality is still the same. It took really long time, before it became normal for her to let anyone hug her, or just simply be close. She was scared that any touch will bring back dark memories.

After leaving child care home, Catra found herself sharing room with Adora, at first it was supposed to be temporary. Everything changed when Adora found a way to stop Catra's nightmare by sleeping next to her, holding the broken girl in her arms. Even if Catra had a bad dream, she was there, grabbing her harder, and assuring her that this is real.

They simply became roommates, Catra found a job in the cafe, when Adora was still focused on school. She tried to be more open for people, but it wasn't easy. It was hard to think that nobody can't hurt her anymore. Without Adora on her side, everything was way harder.

Everyday they were becoming closer to each other, and finally something Catra had never expected happened. One night, being so close to her one and only friend, she felt their foreheads brushing together. She could breathe the air Adora was exhaling. It was already the closest they ever were, and just when Catra thought they can't be closer, Adora touched their lips together, ready to pull back. Instead of doing this, she closed her eyes, letting herself kiss softly Catra's lips, and Catra didn't want her to stop.

From the only good person in her life, from her only and best friend, Adora quickly turned into love of her life. Suddenly all of the things she felt when the blonde was around made sense. After such a long time she was finally loved.

Then everything started to fall apart. It was supossed to be just one party that Adora took her to meet her friends from school. She didn't know that anybody will have any drugs in there and if she knew, they would never go there. But Adora couldn't see the future, after all she was just a human.

Besides, Bow always seemed to be an innocent, nice boy, that's why she left him alone with Catra just for a moment. But when Adora came back, her girlfriend was high as hell on drugs, clinging to her side. Of course she screamed at his colleague, even if he didn't understand any of it. This night started a new chapter of their life, and it wasn't happy.

At first, Catra promised that this was just one time and she will never take drugs again. Well, that was a lie. About a week later, Adora found her girlfriend and Bow high on the floor of their bedroom. She kicked out the boy and screamed at the girl for the first time in her life.

Catra felt good, so fucking good. When she took drugs, she was living in a perfect world, without painful past and haunting memories. There was just here and now, nothing more. She could laugh at anything, even if there was nothing funny at all. After the toxine hit her blood, life was amazing and she wished to stay there forever.

Of course, she didn't want to break the promise, that she gave to Adora, but she was always weak. This one time of feeling free was enough for her to want more. Catra knew it was wrong, that she shouldn't do it. Weakness was stronger than her.

When Bow got her what she needed, world was perfect again. She was so high, she couldn't even see the tears on Adora's face. Catra didn't know that she was also screaming and causing those tears. She was in her own world.

It was addicting. Even if she knew, how wrong it was, she still wanted more and more. Even if she knew, it was causing pain to the love of her life. She was addicted pretty quick and didn't want to stop.

They were arguing more often now, almost everyday. Most of the times when Catra was high, sometimes when she was sober. But it was only a few times. Almost always it looked the same — angry, sad Adora and extremly high Catra screaming at each other, Catra sometimes also throwing things.

One day it looked different. Too different. Catra said too many words she never meant to say. Screamed things that never crossed her mind before. She couldn't control herself anymore and it was too much.

When Catra said her to leave her alone for good, to go and don't come back, something broke in her. She wasn't the same person she met and fell in love. But she did it. She made her wish come true. Adora packed herself and left. Leaving part of her heart behind her.

The next day, Catra finally understood, what happened yesterday. She hurt the only person she cared about. It was the wake up call for her to trow away all drugs, to at least try. She wanted to tell this to Adora, but then Catra hasitated. The blonde was hurt by her too many times, she finally set her free, even if she didn't mean it. Adora could move on and fine someone who would deserve her.

After some time, she put her phone back, letting her go, because this would be better for her angel, right? All she caused was pain, now Adora could be free from Catra and her burden.

Adora was waiting for this call, hoping that those words weren't true but after a few days, she gave up on that hope.

They didn't know, when both of them cried, wishing that the other one would be right next to them.

—

Perfuma was a good therapist, probably one of the best in the city, if not the best. Catra found her on a forum for people struggiling with drug addiction. A lot said that she helped them so much to came back to normal life and leave this shit behind. Without thinking twice, she made a call, next day sitting across the woman.

This was almost two months ago and she was better now. But more important — she was clean. Catra hasn't touch any drugs since the last argument she had with Adora. She even went to a special rehab center to make sure everything won't fall apart. Perfuma helped her do it, so she wasn't alone in this.

But even then, she was feeling like it, because she still couldn't call Adora. She was too scared.

Everytime she was talking with Perfuma, Adora has been the first question asked. Maybe if she had enough faith and bravery she could call her and finally say all the things she wanted too. But it's been seven weeks ago, she probably moved on long ago. Thinking about it hurts, but Catra was almost sure, that this is the truth. Why would Adora wait for her after everything she had done?

Who cares, if she looks at their photos everyday. Who cares, if she cries herself to sleep, missing the touch of her strong arms around her. Who cares, if her heart is still aching for the blonde girl, which she caused so much pain.

But she was better now, right? She was clean, there were no drugs in her blood anymore. Slowly, Catra began coming back to life after almost a year of being an addict. Yes, she should be happy about it, but everything seemed for nothing, if she couldn't celebrate it with Adora.

"If you're too scared of her rejecting your call, maybe you should try to meet her" Perfuma said with a little smile on her face. Catra's eyes widened.

"It's even more stupid than calling." Because it was right? Why would Adora want to meet with her after all of this? After she told her to go and never come back.

Perfuma sighed, while looking softly at the brunette. "You're doing great, Catra but you'll never fully recover if you stay in this place. This girl went through hell with you, are you sure she will turn away from you right now?"

Catra had no idea. Their past was full of struggle and she knew it. But Adora stayed with her and would still be with her if she hadn't said what she said. On the one hand two months have passed, on the other one it was only two months. Maybe she wasn't able to move on. Just maybe.

"I'm the one who told her to get out, why would she want to listen to me after this?" she asked, even if she really had hope. Her heart always belonged to Adora, but what if she didn't feel the same?

"You're the one who told her that, yes, but that doesn't mean you can't ask her to try once again. I want you to think about it, please." And that was the end of their meeting. Catra left the room, thinking which idea is more stupid — calling Adora or going to her place.

And of course she had to choose the more stupid one.

—

Catra always said that Adora was an idiot, but she herself wasn't better. After all she was standing here, outside of the place, where she knew Adora must have live now. She said it to her, when she was leaving — that she's going to stay at Mermista's place. Catra knew, where it was, she came here with her girlfriend a few times, so it wasn't a problem to find it.

Dressed in a suit like some idiot, holding those blue flowers that Adora loves and she can't even remember it's name, she was looking at the building fighting with her own thoughts.

What should she do right now? Just go there and ask her to come back after all she had done? It sounds even more stupid than the fact that she is already standing steps away from the entrance.

'Adora, i'm sorry that I fucked everything up, but I'm trying to be better for you so can you come back please?' she thought to herself. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Catra can't just walk through her door and ask her to go with her. It's not that simple.

She was super nervous, tapping her feet on the sidewalk, non stop watching the entrance. Maybe she shouldn't think and just act? Let the words flew through her without controling every sentence? There was only one thing she was sure about — if she's already here, she won't leave without at least seeing Adora.

And just as she was ready to finally make that first step foward, she saw the familliar blonde hair by the corner of her eye. Catra immediately turned her head in that side, finding Adora but with someone else. She had no idea, who was this girl, she had never seen her before. Catra would remember someone with pink hair, even on drugs. It was someone new, it had to be.

Catra couldn't go there and say the things she wanted, when Adora was with somebody, who probably didn't even knew her. She was ready to wait, hoping for the small girl to walk away so she could run and finally talk to her guardian angel. But then her heart broke into milion pieces and there was no chances to fix it this time.

The pink-haired woman stood on her toes, placing a really quick kiss on Adora's mounth.

The flowers have landed on the sidewalk, tears starting to run dawn her cheeks. So she moved on. Of course she did, why would she wait for her after everything she had done? Catra had hurt her so many times, Adora should finally find someone better. And she did. Catra thought of it so many times, so why did it hurt so bad?

Suddenly, the whole world was dark again, without a reason to stay and fight. All this time she was fighting for Adora, hoping to fix things someday, to make everything right. But it all didn't make sense now. Her love finally found her happiness. Without her. And Catra should be happy for her.

She had no idea, when she turned around, starting to walk away. It wasn't supossed to be like that. Sure, Catra was scared of this, but it shouldn't be real. It was just two months, Adora couldn't move on so easily from her. But she saw it, so it had to be true.

Her heart was broken in a way like it never had before. She knew that she shouldn't come here and probably if she didn't maybe there would be still a reason to fight. But now? Adora will never come back to her, she will never hold her hand again, and hug her when she had a bad dream. This was the end of their story.

Catra stopped, letting her tears hit the sidewalk. She closed her eyes, hugging herself so hard, she almost couldn't breathe. This is not how she wanted it to end. She never wanted it to end. But she caused this. All of it was her fault. Catra had told Adora to get out and she did. Then she moved on.

The brunette could feel the pain in her chest, burning her alive. So many years ago she stayed because of Adora, and maybe that was a mistake? If she knew back then how much it will hurt, she would just jump. Her guardian angel gave up on her.

All of the struggle to be better, to stop taking drugs, to find herself again — was it all for nothing? Suddenly her fight was over. She lost. Again. But this time, she wasn't strong enough to get up. There was no more reason to fight for. It was time to finally gave up. Forever.

—

An hour later, she was home. Her jacked thrown somewhere on the ground, shirt taken out of her pants and phone in her hand. Catra decided already what to do now, but she couldn't just leave. Maybe it was stupid but she had to say what she wanted to. She needed to let Adora know that she really tried.

It's been almost twenty minutes of her, looking at Adora's phone number, when she was still thinking about what she should say if the blonde would pick up. But even if she did, Catra wasn't going to back up. It was too late for her anyway.

Finally she took a deep breath and clicked the button, choosing to call her. One signal, second, third, fourth... she didn't pick up. Seconds later she heard the voice mail asking her to leave a massage. So she did.

"Hey, Adora" she started, already feeling new tears appear in her eyes. "I know you probably don't want to talk with me and... I understand. It's been two months and you should move on, it's really fine."

No it's not.

"I decided to call you this one last time. Just to tell you the things i couldn't say to you face to face." She cried hard and it was just a beggining of what she wanted to say. "Damn, it's really harder than i thought."

Catra thought that without Adora on the line it would be much easier, but it wasn't. Saying all of it out loud was like admiting to killing someone.

"Remember when we met? You came into my life just when I was ready to finally end it all and literally gave me a second life. I never said it to you, but I always thought that you're my guardian angel, who found me just in time. I was so tired back then, I didn't had any hope and then you just stood beside me. You fought for me, when I wasn't able to and I'm not sure if I had ever said a proper thank you. Thank you, Adora. Thank you for saving me that day. I know you never said it, but I know that you knew why I was there. And you could just walk past me, but you didn't. Thank you for pulling me out of that hell and for holding my hand all the way through it. Thank you for staying with me, even when I didn't deserve it. Thank you for showing me, what a friendship looks like. You made me feel like I'm not useless anymore. That I can be somebody. You showed me what it's like to feel needed, loved. Thank you for loving me, even when i was an asshole that you didn't deserve. You should have find someone better, who would treat you in the way you deserve it. Someone who wouldn't hurt you in the ways I did. Someone who would carry you to sleep, snuggle all night and whisper sweet little things. Someone who would buy you those stupid blue flowers everyday and would remember the name of it. Someone who would go with you to those nice parties you always wanted me to go. Someone who would dance with you in the moonlight every night to your favourite song. You know, the one that is always making me laugh. You deserve someone who would never gave into drugs and got addicted to them. Someone who would never scream at you in the way I did. Someone who would listen to you when you said it's wrong and bad. Someone who would give you their hoodies intead of stealing yours. Someone who would go with you to all of the scary movies in the cinemas instead of being a chicken. You really deserve better, Adora. I was never good enough for you and you were always to perfect for me. I was a total disaster, when you were fucking ideal. All I ever did was cause you a lot of pain. I'm sorry for that, Adora. I'm so fucking sorry that it had to be you. It could have been anyone, but it was you. You were hurt all over, because I was around. I'm sorry, Adora. I really am. You made me free from the darkness and I locked you in hell. You never deserved that. I'm sorry."

She had to stop for a moment to take a breath. Catra was crying so much, that she couldn't see anything around her, instead repeating memories of Adora in her head, what made her cry even harder. It was so hard, but she had to do it.

"You know, I'm not taking drugs anymore. I haven't taken any since you left. I'm clean for you." She laughed even if she didn't mean to. "I went to rehab and therapy to try and fix things between us someday. I know that I destroyed everything that we build but I really wanted to fix it. I tried calling you so many times but I've hurt you so bad, why would you want to talk with me after all of this shit. I needed you but you deserve better. It's time to finally let you go. I've hurt you enough. When I was trying to fix myself, you moved on. I'm really happy that you did, because it's better for you. You can be free from me. My therapist told me to try and meet you, because I can't fully recover, if thinking about you is stopping. So I went to the place, where you told me to look for you and... I saw you."

Memories of the vision flashing through her eyes, heart aching even more than seconds before. Why the hell it hurt so bad?

"I hope she will treat you better than I did. That she will give you the love you deserve, not tears and pain I gave you. I'm sorry that I was stupid enough to think that you would rather come back to me than find real happiness. Please, find someone who will love you in the way you loved me. Don't let anybody hurt you ever again. Please, Adora, be happy. Forget about others, you deserve to be truly happy."

She paused, taking a deep breath before the last part of her goodbye. The last words before leaving. The last goodbye.

"I really love you with all my heart and soul and even when I was bad for you I still loved you like crazy. You gave me the most beautiful years of my life, even when there were dark times. I love you, I always have and I'll always will. No matter what. You could stab me in the hart but it wouldn't kill me, because you're my heart, Adora. I'm sorry I wasn't able to show it to you. All I ever truly wanted was for you to feel loved and happy and then I fucked it up. You're the love of my life, Adora, always have been, always will be. My love for you won't change even in another lifetime. Thank you for giving me those few beautiful years, for making me smile and laugh. Thank you for giving me hope and will to live. This is my goodbye, if you haven't already notice. I won't ever call you again, so you can finally start a new life. I'm gonna give it to you, just like you gave me one on that stupid bridge. Be happy and think about me sometimes, okey? Just sometimes is enough. Thank you for everything. I'm sorry for even more. I love you, Adora. Goodbye."

She hung up, throwing her phone on the floor and leaving the apartment. It was time for her.

—

This time it was completely dark outside, raindrops slowly falling down on her, mixing with bitter tears still coming from her eyes. Right now no one was able to tell, how broken she was. Soaked from walking all the way here, she finally leaned against the railing of the bridge, looking down at the river. There was no starts mirrored in the water tonight, because the sky was full of clouds. This night was entirely different.

Catra combed her short hair back to free her forehead from wet strands. The street was empty, silence being her only friend right now. She was standing in the place, where streetlights couldn't reach, so nobody could see her. Nobody could save her.

It was over now, finally she lost her fight and it was okay. She fought long enough to make Adora pround of her. Now, Catra could let go of everything.

There were times, when she came back to this place in her thoughts and dreams, thinking about what would have happened if the blonde girl wouldn't stopped next to her. Maybe the world would have been better? She didn't knew this, but one thing was for sure — Adora wouldn't suffer like that. If she jumped, everything would be better for everyone around her. Catra was a mess and all she was capable of was making others hurt. She could only cause pain and damage.

She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. There was no point in thinking so much, when it's finally over. Catra won't have to fight again. It was her finish-line.

Her lips were trembling when she grabbed the railing a lot harder. Just one step, one jump and all will finally be fixed. Her heart stopped, when in the darkness of her closed eyelids she saw Adora, smiling at her with outstretched hand. It will be okay.

Another deep breath and she was ready. Catra lifted one of her legs to move it to the other side of the railing, when she heard something from far away. Someone was running and she had to wait a second. She couldn't risk for anybody to save her, not this time. With every drop of the rain, the footsteps got louder and the person was getting closer. Catra was hoping they would run fast past through her, ignoring her existance, but she was wrong.

When the footsteps were just right next to her, she suddenly felt strong arms wrapping around her hard. It took her less than a second to recognize this hold and to notice the silent cry, coming from behind her. Catra couldn't open her eyes now, it felt to unreal to be true.

"I'm not too late." She heard quiet whisper in her neck. "Thank God, I'm not too late."

Was it real? Or did she just jumped and went to heaven? She felt this warm breath on her skin, those strong arms holding her so hard, like if loosing the grip just a little bit would made her dissapear. Could it be true?

"I'm so fucking sorry, Catra. I was so stupid for leaving you back then, I thought you hated me and I was scared to come back. I should never leave you, I should have stayed with you and help you. I'm so sorry." She cried hard and Catra's heart was breaking even more with every sob coming from Adora.

If it was real, she couldn't let her hurt like that again, not after she found her here again. Scared as hell, Catra had finally opened her eyes, looking down at Adora's hands wrapped around her. Slowly she lifted her hand, placing it on blonde's wrist. She was real, she could feel it.

"I've never moved on from you, Catra. I didn't want to. Glimmer asked me to watch a movie with her and I had no idea she had a crush on me, I promise. I pulled her away but I think it was too late, I'm so sorry it meant nothing to me." Every word was louder and quieter at the same time, warm tears making Catra's neck wet again. "I don't want anybody else, you idiot. You're mine, no matter what. My life is so fucking empty without you that it hurts more than anything else. I won't let you go ever again. I'll do anything to stay with you forever, you dumbass. I was scared that drugs made you realize that you don't love me anymore and I wanted to give you space, I'm sorry."

Catra turned around slowly, taking Adora's face in her hands, bumping their foreheads together. She was real. She came here to save her again. Her guardian angel, her love, her best friend, her savior.

"How did you know?" The brunette asked, looking straight into those blue eyes, filled with fear and love. "I didn't said anything."

Adora shook her head.

"When you called I was in the shower so I couldn't pick up and before I came back, you hang up. So I opened the voice massage right away after I saw that it was from you. You were crying, even when you tried to hide it so hard. Yes, Catra you didn't said anything about what you're going to do but after just a few lines I was running to your place, and then you said something and I knew it's worse than i thought. You said goodbye, Catra. You never said this before, even when you wanted me to get out of your life, even when that bitch was finally going to jail, you didn't tell her that. I stopped for a moment and turned to run here. Because I knew that if you're going to do it, it would be this fucking place. I was running as fast as I could, praying that by the time I'll get here, it won't be too late. I was so scared, Catra. I thought that I lost you forever and..." She stopped here looking carefully in those heterochromatic eyes, skipping from blue to yellow like she wanted to remember every detail of them. "I can't lose you, Catra. If you would die, half of me would die with you. I couldn't live knowing that you're gone."

The brunette wrapped her hands around Adora's neck, taking a step closer to hide her face in the girl's neck, holding her just as hard as she was held. The taller woman rested her head on Catra's wet hair, closing her eyes.

"I'm sorry." The smaller one whispered, letting another tears fall from her eyes. "I'm so sorry."

"Stop apologizing, please. It's okay, I'm here and I'll never leave you again. Maybe you're not perfect but you're all I ever wanted. I don't care about the pain from the past, it doesn't matter anymore. It's all behind us, alright? It's gone. Remember when we were standing here all those years ago and opened a new chapter in our lives? Let's do it again. An empty page, without guilt. Without drugs. I'm pround of you. Because of the rehab, the therapy. You're so fucking strong, Catra and that's why I love you so much. If I'm the one thing keeping you here, let me hold you like this forever. I promise that I'll never leave you again, no matter how hard you would scream at me or push me away. I'll stay with you this time. There's nothing in my life that I regret more than letting you get rid of me so easily. I should never go anywhere outside that stupid doors. From now on you won't get rid of me. Never."

Catra was crying so hard, that it was difficult to breathe. She had hurt her so many times, throw her away from her life and still, she was here. Adora had came back to grab her before she could fall. After everything they went through, she wanted to stay beside Catra.

"You're such an idiot." She said quietly, slowly pulling away to push their foreheads together one more time. "Why do you still want me?"

Adora smiled so bright that Catra could have swore it became daytime for a second. The taller woman slowly moved her hands to brunette's cheeks, grabbing them lightly. Her thumbs tried to wipe away tons of tears dripping down her face.

"Because I'm your idiot, dumbass. Nothing matters when you're not with me. Those two months were the hardest of my life. There was no time that I wasn't thinking about you, about how you're doing and if you're okay. I was so stupid for leaving you that it hurts. I want you because you're the only one I've ever wanted. I don't care if you will throw tanks or airplanes at me, I'm not leaving you again. All I will ever want is you, Catra. That stubborn little brat, who steals my hoodies and loves clinging into me. I want to help you recover fully, to hold you through this and lead you to light again. I've done this once and I want to do it twice. I can do it for the rest of my life if that's my job. If my only purpose on this world is protecting you, I'll do it with the biggest smile on my face. Let me keep you safe, let me save you one more time and thousend more if needed. Let me love you for the rest of my life. Because that's all I want to do in this world."

Catra smiled, giving the other girl those loving eyes she remembered so brightly. "Stay. Forever." It was all she was able to say after all of it. And for Adora it was more than enough. She placed a light kiss on Catra's mouth, second later pulling her closer to hug her tight again.

"As you wish, babe." She said and Catra was smiling wider than ever.

"Hey, Adora?" The silent question was met with a soft grunt. "I love you too, you idiot."

And in this moment, another dark chapter ended, opening a brand new page for them. Sure, it wouldn't be easy to start and write another story but it will be worth it. Catra had her guardian angel back and Adora made a promise to never leave her again. It was more than enough for them to close this old book and find a new one. They were the writers of their story and this time it will be perfect. It has to be.