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Before everything, there is an apartment. It looks out onto a theatre, and it is full of light and love and friendship. A bright and thriving community surrounds it, and it was happy. Above all else, it was a place of joy.
There is love in this apartment. It is full to bursting with love, burning with it. Although perhaps that is just one of the tenants, the phoenix. Though she is young for an immortal, she has travelled well, and was searching for her own joy after seeing so much of others.
She can’t imagine life being better.
Of course, that means that it won’t last.
—-
“Hey.” Felix says, kissing Paci’s shoulder softly. “I wish you would’ve told me.” They’re tense, unsteady. “About your other mark...”
“I know.” Star says, turning to give her a smile, slightly raw around the edges. “But-“
“-we’ll figure it out.” She says, returning their smile. “Okay? Promise.”
Rain steps away at that, turning to put on their coat. Felix steps away too, heading back to the counter. There’ll be time to talk about this.
“Hey.”
Xe look up again, at Paci framed in the doorway. They flash a charming grin.
“Best of wives and best of women.” Star quips.
She laughs. “Get out of here, c’mon.”
Paci blows xem a kiss, and is gone.
Felix sits at the counter, nursing xyr cup of tea absently as xe stare into the distance, lost in though. Xe wonder what xyr wife’s other soulmate will be like. Soulmates are said to be a balance, people who compliment each other perfectly. Xe didn’t think that Paci needed another counterweight, but whatever. Soulmates work in mysterious ways after all.
Besides, it might be nice, having someone else around. Maybe they’ll have more of a tendency for dramatics than she does, she’s sure that would make Paci happy.
Lost in daydreams, a small smile curls around her face. Yes, this would be good for them. And even if they weren’t Felix’s soulmate too, that’s fine.
Sitting in the sunlight, in a home built on love, Felix makes a promise.
I promise to love and support Paci’s other mark. I promise to love them as if they were my own soulmate, and to welcome them into our home.
I just hope they don’t get Paci hurt...
——
Divanon does not have a soulmark. He does not want one. In his opinion, they’re quite useless. He takes pride in not needing anyone, and that includes his soulmate.
There is a small, hurting part of them that wants something. Wants someone. But it’s pointless to want things like that. Doesn’t do anyone any good.
And besides, they don’t like the idea of someone knowing them, in a way that runs deeper than anything. They don’t want that, and no one else could possibly want that either. They would know.
Sitting on the lights, high above the stage of his theatre, he thinks about the man and child in the house next to the building. Thinks about nights spent separate, thinks about screaming matches while the baby cried.
A gloved hand curls into a fist, and he turns his mind to happier things.
The rebel and her wife... they fascinate him. He can see the seeds of unhappiness, hidden beneath a blanket of limerence.
The rebel is a flirt. She will go along with whatever is fun, and then if star’s committed enough, for long after that. The current faction war is a prime example, and Divanon intents to take full advantage of that.
The rebel is magnetic, even from afar, and they can feel a restless, exciting feeling pulse through their veins at the thought of star.
The issue of the phoenix is one that should be dealt with easily. She already directs and manages several events at the theatre, unknowing of the real director, watching, pulling the strings.
They smile slightly behind their mask. The phoenix is fascinating in and of herself, but the rebel is the real prize.
Soon, they whisper into the dust filled air, turning over their plan in their mind. Soon.
——
“It’s you.” Xe breathe, looking up at the figure on the stage. “You’re Paci’s other mark.”
Their hands curl into fists for a brief moment, before forcibly relaxing. “I don’t have a mark, so I don’t see how that could be true.”
“You don’t have a mark?” She asks, tilting her head curiously.
“No.”
“But everyone does.” Xe argue.
“Clearly not everyone.” They say, with a hint of iciness.
“Well, nevertheless,” xe concede, twitching xyr feathers, “you’re Paci’s other mate. You must be. I’ve never-“ xyr mouth twists unpleasantly, face darkening. “You two are very similar people.”
“Is that so.” Divanon drawls. “That says a lot about your relationship, doesn’t it?”
She shoots him a glare, refusing to rise to the barb. “I made a promise to love and support their other soulmate, no matter what. I... am willing to make that promise to you.”
They laugh. “You’re a very forgiving person, Felix.”
“Well... I try to be.” Xe say carefully. “And actually, the more that I think about it, the more it makes sense. You said that you were doing this to prove a point, right? To get Paci’s attention?”
“To prove a point, yes.” Divanon says, carefully dodging xyr other question.
“Then there you go. Only Paci’s soulmate would do this, would kidnap someone for their cause.” Felix’s face is drawn with bitterness, and anger glints behind xyr eyes.
“Ah.” He says, voice twisting in a curious mockery. “What does that say about you, then?”
She blinks, biting her lip. “... I don’t know.” She says, glancing towards the side door.
“Hm.” They say, rocking back on their heels. The conversation lapses into silence, both lost in their own thoughts. Felix stares at the door, knuckles clenched against the arms of the chair.
“Say that I am Paci’s other soulmate.” Divanon says suddenly, crouching at the edge of the stage. “How would you have known? It’s not something that anyone other than a bonded pair themselves could know.”
Xe blink, turning to look back at Divanon. “I don’t... fully know. It just... feels like it’s right. If you subscribe to the idea that soulmates are each other’s “better or worse half””, xe say, using air quotes, “then I’d say that I’m Paci’s better half, and you’re their worse one. And besides, your mask and her mark match.” Xyr voice and face are carefully neutral.
“Is that all you’re going off of? Not very scientific.” He says, smile evident in his voice.
“No- it’s mostly just a feeling. It makes sense. It clicks, I suppose. I don’t know how else to explain it.” She says, brow furrowed. “And also, soulmates aren’t meant to be scientific. That negates the point of them, I think.”
“Hm. Well, I guess we’ll see.” Divanon says, and they do not speak again for the rest of the day.
——
After Paci leaves, Felix sits silent and still in her chair, head bowed. It is quiet in the theatre, dust motes drifting through the muted air. A man sits on the edge of the stage, porcelain mask hiding anything they might be thinking or feeling.
“I think you may be right.” He says suddenly, drumming his fingers on the stage.
Xe say nothing.
“About my soulmate.”
At that, xyr ear twitches, and xyr knuckles clench on the armrests of the chair. “And how-“ xyr voice breaks, and xe swallow dryly. “And how was it. Everything you dreamed it would be.”
“No,” he says, swinging his legs idly. “I never really dreamed about it. Seemed like a waste of time.”
A pause, not too dissimilar to the one from yesterday, if only one could ignore the fact that everything has changed since then.
“It was electrifying.” They say quietly, reverently.
She nods mutely, a single tear dripping onto her lap. Divanon doesn’t notice, busy staring off into the distance.
“They have that effect on people.” Felix whispers to the floor.
The conversation, if could be called that, lapses into silence. Divanon eventually returns home, and the sunbeams slant across the rows of chairs until they disappear. Night falls.
And only when the moon is high in the sky, when darkness cloaks the room, does a noise ring through the quiet.
Felix sobs, great heaving gasps that are absorbed by the shadows. Her soulmark burns on her chest, the arrow feeling as if it’s piercing her heart.
The moon is the only witness to xyr tears.
——
They say that when your soulmate dies, you feel as if you’re the one dying. The pain, the loss of your match no longer being alive can shock some into an early grave as well, and most who survive the initial all encompassing grief pass away less than a year later.
Few widowed matches last longer than that.
Most of those widowed describe the feeling as an aching, hollow emptiness. “Like the pain of it is eating you alive.” said one.
Curled in a bed made for two, feathers and hair unkempt and messy, Felix wonders idly how long it’ll be for her. A few months? A year or so? More? She can’t really bring herself to muster anything more than a feeling of mild relief at the thought. At least the constant, soul deep agony would be over.
(Distantly, like an echo, xe know that thinking like that is bad, that xe once rebelled against it. Again, xe cant really bring xemself to care.)
Xe watch the moonbeams glide across the emptiness of the bed. The moon is full and gorgeous in the sky, gleaming like a pearl. It’s beautiful. It hurts to look at, to think about.
It’s achingly quiet. Downstairs, the clock ticks distantly, the only testament to the passage of time. With each second, she continues to breathe. It’s torturous. It’s glorious. She’s never wanted to do anything more or less.
With each rattle of air in her lungs, she tries to picture a future without her mate. All she sees is a gloomy, hollow shell of herself, wandering through life as a living ghost.
Xe sigh, shifting slightly to lightly touch xyr mark. They never did talk about it.
—-
Surprisingly, having several tonnes of steel and lighting equipment fall on you hurts like a bitch.
Divanon comes to with a stage light crushing where his lung cavity would be, if he had any lungs. Twisted shards of metal pierce their leg, pinning them to the splintered stage. Thankfully, they all seem to have missed his core.
Experimentally, they shift slightly. If they can get out of this with regenerating, that would be ideal.
Sobs echo around the theatre, the verbalization of soulwrenching pain, and Divanon grimly clenches his jaw against his answering agony.
The rebel- she was his soulmate. And she’s dead.
—-
It has been six months, and Felix is still alive. Barely.
Her hair is matted and clumped, her eyes dark and tired. Xyr wings drag on the ground, uncaring of any dirt. Her hands shake constantly now, and she is eerily thin.
It has been six months, and Felix is still alive. Practically unheard of for a widowed match, but xe suppose, bitterly, that it’s due to xyr phoenix blood.
Stumbling, xe drag xyrself to the balcony. It’s quiet outside, dark gray clouds hanging low over the skyline. Xe avoid looking at the partially collapsed building a few blocks away, careful to keep xyr eyes focused on safer things.
All the plants are dead in their pots, brown and withered. Collapsed sunflower stems crunch beneath her talons.
Xe look out towards the centre of the city, absently rubbing the mark on xyr collarbone. It hasn’t faded yet, for some reason. The marks of dead mates always do.
She doesn’t know why she came out here. The world is still torturously bleak, an endless stretch of misery and pain. It doesn’t matter if the plants are dead anymore.
A high pitched roar echos across the city, sending an involuntary shiver down xyr spine. Xe’ve been hearing those more and more recently, ever since the blood rain started.
Idly, she wonders where everyone else went. The neighbourhood used to be so lively. With a sudden icy jolt of fear, she realizes she doesn’t know if they’re even still alive. How long has it been? Is the war ended? What of Lauri?
Her hands clench around the rusting railing, and xe suck in a cold breath.
“What happened...” xe whisper, horrified. It’s as if the world suddenly came into focus, fog briefly clearing for the first time in months.
Xe clench xyr eyes shut, looking up at the ominous clouds. Thunder rumbles.
Xe turn back inside, a rediscovered steel in xyr eyes. Whatever happened out there in her absence, she intends to learn.
——
It has been six months, and Divanon is still alive. Barely.
They are, above almost all else, a survivor. The lab, the lava, the falling lights couldn’t kill them. Sure, they all hurt like hell, but they always get back up again. Unshakable, untouchable, unkillable. No matter what.
Doubled over in pain, he thinks wryly that the loss of his soulmate might just do the trick this time.
It comes and goes, this pain. Some days it is merely a dull ache around his heart, like a beating bruise.
Other days it’s an all encompassing agony, leaving him incapacitated for however long it lasts.
Clawing at the ground, he curses Paci’s stupid fucking memory, making him suffer like this. The beautiful, intoxicating bitch.
Distantly, through a haze of misery, they wonder if she is suffering like this too. Probably. It’s likely far worse for her though. Being Paci’s real mark.
He growls at the thought, thrashing in pain. He doesn’t hate Felix. Never really has. But sometimes, in his weaker moments, he feels overwhelmingly, stupidly jealous.
Another wave of agony washes over them, and they groan. Bullshit. Complete fucking bullshit that the death of a dramatic bastard they knew for a week was causing this- this torture.
Yes. That’s what it was. Torture. Souldeep, pointless torture. They knew their mate, their Paci, was gone, they didn’t need a constant fucking reminder.
Divanon clenches his fists, shakily raising himself up as the pain starts to fade back to the space around where his heart would be.
He gags, feeling that familiar fire start to ignite in him. The snakelike urge to bite and hurt and snarl, coiling dark and menacing around his spine.
They stand on stiff knees, wiping bile from their chin with the back of their hand. A plan starts to form, one that fulfils the fire, calms the snake.
After all, he thinks grimly, setting out into the blood rain, it’s never over.