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Rose stared down at the device in her hands. Her black lips pressed into a thin line as she contemplated her life choices up to this point.
Carefully she opened the bathroom door and called out to her beloved.
“Kanaya dear, do you have a moment?”
Kanaya walked into the room curiously. Her casual robes falling elegantly over her curves. If this situation wasn’t so strange Rose would be tempted to see what’s underneath.
“Of course my love what is it?” Kanaya questioned
Rose held up the pregnancy test that depicted a small pink plus sign on its screen. Three more just like it were left on the bathroom counter because Rose could not believe it the first time.
“Did you know that trolls could get humans pregnant?” Rose asked primly despite knowing the answer.
Of course they couldn’t- shouldn’t, be able to get humans pregnant. Never mind being different species Kanaya was a woman. Although trolls were more hermaphrodite than binary…
Besides the matter Rose was a goddess! Shouldn’t there be like, divine birth control or something?! She should’ve known something like this would happen, The Game makes a mockery of her still.
Kanaya mimicked her earlier look of shock. Delicate lips spread open gaping like a fish out of water.
“I- no I did not know that” she said faintly
“That’s what I thought” Rose sighed
She walked over to where Kanaya was standing frozen and gently guided them both to the bed. Her hands clasped Kanaya’s to keep them both from trembling.
“I can’t say this is something I ever thought would happen, but now that it has how are we feeling?” Rose said ever the diplomat
“It’s not me who’s carrying” Kanaya retorted “how are you feeling?”
Rose huffed a laugh through her nose.
“I’m surprised, and a bit nervous on how this could turn out but if you want to, to keep them-“
“Yes!” Kanaya blurts “yes, yes of course I do! Oh Rose the idea of starting a family with you” she smiles wide and Rose squints a little at the literal light coming off her in this moment.
“Well then” Rose says “we should make a doctors appointment first, and of course we’ll have start telling people-“
Rose was cut off by the ring of her cell phone. The sounds of shitty rap playing over the speaker. Dave. Frowning she reached for her phone and unlocked it putting the call on speaker.
“Hello brother dearest” Rose says “you better have a good reason for calling-“
“Yeah yeah or you’ll skin me or something listen” Dave says the next part lowly “are trolls able to get pregnant?”
Rose blinked. Then blinked again. She stared at Kanaya who stared back. The silence went on for too long because Dave started panicking
“Because, and this is going to sound crazy I know, but Karkat’s been acting really strange and he’s gained some weight. Not that there’s anything wrong with that, you know I like a body with some meat on it if you know what I mean, he was already a beefcake but now he’s the whole cow. Wait that came off wrong, I didn’t mean, whatever he’s also been throwing up in the morning and craving really weird things. Like beyond troll’s eating weird stuff weird, and I don’t really know if pregnant is the right word for it but-“
“Dave I am pregnant” Rose interrupts before her brother can go too far into this tirade
There’s another long silence and Rose stifles a giggle imagining Dave’s open mouth expression.
“Congratulations?” He says weakly “it’s Kanayas I presume?”
“You presume correctly. Congratulations to you too” Rose says “how are you feeling?”
“Well I’m still trying to figure out how the fuck this is even possible” Dave starts
“Trolls used to be able to reproduce with each other before the Condesencion put into place the mother grub” Kanaya says “perhaps the DNA is still within us, like you humans and your tail bones”
“Was I on speaker phone this whole time?” Dave asks
“Yes” Kanaya and Rose say and share a look as Dave curses
“I am not mad at you for, what’s the phrase you humans use, knocking my moirail up?” Kanaya says “so long as Karkat and you are rational going forward I see no reason why this wouldn’t be a joyful situation”
“That’s. Good. That’s good” Dave says faintly “trolls can get pregnant, and get others pregnant. That’s good to know. Uhm.”
“How about you let Karkat know the situation and we can all meet up for tea and discuss things?” Kanaya suggests
“Yeah. Yeah I should do that. Thank you K, uh, congrats again on the baby, wiggler? Grub? Yeah I’m gonna go talk to Karkat” Dave stammers through his goodbye before the phone goes silent.
“Well, this has been eventful” Kanaya says
“Yes” Rose says before making a face like she’s sucked a lemon
“What is it dear?”
“I do not like the implication that Dave and I conceived in the same day” Rose says
Kanaya almost falls off the bed laughing.