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Elizabeth had noted with growing concern her youngest sisters’ proclivity to hover around redcoats and was therefore not surprised when Lydia declared a great need to walk to town nearly double what had heretofore been an average of once or twice a week. Indeed had not Jane’s illness consumed much of her care, and Mr. Darcy’s unpleasant if not unjust judgment of herself and all her family filled the rest of her thoughts while staying at Netherfield, Elizabeth would have much sooner seen the advantage verging on need to accompany the two youngest Bennet sisters whenever they went out. Although the scenery on walk to Meryton was not so picturesque or the wind so fresh as on her preferred paths, she did not begrudge the extra exercise when the opportunity presented itself quite nearly directly after the family broke their fast Monday morning.

Having returned with relief to the familiarity of Longbourn’s unique set of inhabitants, she did not find the volume of Lydia’s voice or the near instantaneous agreement of her mother for them to go out when the request was made as grating as she had before. Lydia, however, had not mentioned any specific errand nor had she been asked to. Recalling the embarrassment that had flooded her when Lydia had been so bold as to directly inquire after a ball in the very man’s home whose funds would be required to hold such an event, in front of not only the hostess presumptive, but also the most disagreeable, proud Mr. Darcy, Elizabeth was loath to allow such a scene to occur again unchecked. It was decided the two eldest would accompany two youngest sisters, with Jane proclaiming she would take the opportunity to increase her strength and enjoy being out of doors after her cold.

Confident some opportunity would present itself and Lydia rise to the occasion, Elizabeth was prepared when, after entering town after a brisk walk uninhibited by any less-than-fit parson, she heard Lydia call out to Denny. She would have scolded her for not addressing the officer by anything besides his surname in such a familiar manner had not she noticed the man walking alongside and his handsome face. Recovering herself, she took her sister’s hand to slow her crossing to the front of the shop the men were currently passing, and facilitated somewhat civilized introductions. His companion, Lt. Denny explained, was a friend come lately from town to join the militia. Lydia was in raptures considering the already pleasing figure would soon be shown to best advantage by donning a red coat and saber.

Seeming to forget that one usually come to town intending to spend some time in the vicinity, Lydia quickly arranged for the soldier and his soon-to-be compatriot to accompany the ladies back to Longborn directly. Perceiving the look the men exchanged, one of amusement and something less favorable she could not quite find the precise descriptor for, Elizabeth was glad she had come and began to attempt to temper the boisterous behavior of her youngest sisters and steer the conversation to a polite, if not overly engaging subject.

After crossing the bridge, she heard hoofbeats approaching from behind and quickly got the group to the side. Mr. Darcy appeared over the apex of the bridge but had not yet seen them, as he was looking behind him over his far shoulder. As he turned his gaze forward, Elizabeth witnessed Mr. Wickham react and then a moment later Mr. Darcy’s face change dramatically as it shifted from her’s to that of the man on whose arm she was on. One turned white, the other red. Mr. Darcy was prevented from immediately riding away as Mr. Bingley was in the process of crossing directly in the center of the bridge, oblivious to the tension but not to the fact that his angel had appeared immediately before him.

He called out to the party and expressed concern that Miss Bennet may be overexerting herself so soon after her recovery.

“You must allow me to insist on accompanying you back to Longborn.”

Dismounting, he turned to the two men in the Bennet party, “Not that you are in any way unable to ensure these ladies’ safety, Lt Denny and…? I don’t think we’ve been introduced, have we Darcy?”

The gentleman he addressed thus did not react and was still, save for the slight shake of his fists, which were balled on the reigns so tightly his knuckles had turned white. His horse seem to be extremely well-trained as it merely flicked its tail in annoyance at such treatment.

Unable to resist, Elizabeth added her voice to Bingley’s, “Indeed, allow me to introduce you. Mr. Darcy, this is Mr. Wickham. He is come to join the militia. I’m sure you will relish this opportunity for a new acquaintance to spare you from the confined and unvarying society here.”

Darcy reacted in a barely perceptible manner. It almost seemed as though he had given them the cut direct. Elizabeth was incensed, Bingley absorbed in ensuring Jane was indeed well after such a walk, and Lydia uninterested in anyone without regimentals. Indeed, after the first instance had failed and no one seemed to mind Mr. Darcy’s detached manner, Elizabeth determined to add a rejoiner to force the issue. Before she could speak though, Mr. Wickham intercepted her attempt.

“You do not acknowledge me. Well, Darcy, if you think to affect me or my new acquaintance with these obliging young ladies, it shall not be so. I doubt not that your typical behavior in an unknown society would make it all to easy for me to expound on our intimate ties and certain disappointed hopes on both sides. And I am certain your pride would prevent you publicly voicing your concerns over the family matters that transpired this summer.”

Only Mr. Darcy’s gaze showed any sign of having heard this as it flicked instantly towards his challenger. His jaw locked and his nostrils flared. Elizabeth was unused to such intensity from Darcy and involuntarily gasped slightly. His demeanor changed for the briefest of moments and his head whipped towards her. He seemed to be somehow even tenser than before.

“Your commanding officer seemed to be a reasonable sort when Bingley and I dined with him last week, but perhaps not as well informed of certain events as another Colonel may be. I would like nothing better than to put those gentlemen into contact. Their actions are not bound by civility as mine are. Meryton is by no means unprotected.”

”Bingley, you will excuse me from joining you and the Miss Bennets. I find I have some pressing correspondence to see to.” At the last sentiment he looked directly at Elizabeth and continued solely to her, “Good day.”

With that, he swiftly turned his horse and rode towards Netherfield at a trot.

Bingley took as little notice of the details of his friend’s departure as he had those of the introduction Elizabeth had attempted. He had Jane on one arm and the reigns of his horse in his other hand ready to spend the walk to Longborn in conversation. Kitty and Lydia attached themselves to Denny and Wickham respectively, much to the former girl’s chagrin. Elizabeth attempted to coral their loud conversation but was side tracked by the interaction of the two gentlemen who had such a history as to produce such palpable tension and produced such expressiveness even from the unreadable Mr. Darcy. If he looked at her to find fault, he seemed to do so to Wickham with not only success in that very endevour but a history full of what he considered express proof of egregious flaws.

She recalled their conversation at Netherfeild. Convinced as she was that she had no thought or care for Mr. Darcy’s opinion of her person, beyond that which she knew of his view of her lacking any beauty, she was confident she would never garner such wrath justly from that quarter. Indeed she could not see how anyone could have. She was quite lost to what Mr. Wickham was replying to Lydia’s decreasingly polite questions and topics of conversation.

They reached Longborn and the men were entreated to come refresh themselves inside, which was easily done as they were all eager for such an invitation. The day was rather warm for the time of year and the company pleasing. Mrs. Bennet was within the morning room the group repaired to, and after introductions were made, fell inline with the discourse of her younger daughter, giggling as if she were a girl and not a matron of her own house with five daughters out.

Had not the visit produced the opportunity for Jane and Mr. Bingley to have private conversation outside the influence of his superior sisters and proud friend, with the added benefit of novel connections distracting Elizabeth’s own sisters or mother from interrupting, it would have still been enjoyable as Elizabeth was much more likely to enjoy Lydia’s folly in the privacy of her own home. As it was, she had a pleasant time due to both amusement and gratification of Jane’s current happiness and the hope for further felicity in that corner solidifying, and Mr. Wickham’s quick wit and merry, warm eyes. After the quarter hour passed, Mr Bingley departed in high spirits. The officers bid him farewell before they to stared they would need to be returning to their camp. Lydia insisted Mr Wickham come to their Aunt Phillips’s later that day, an invitation he eventually accepted.

The ladies left within were no less pleased and Mrs. Bennet especially so, for although Mr. Wickham had been her focus for conversation, she was peripherally aware of Jane’s visitor and her eldest daughter’s success during the visit, which she bragged of later at the Phillips’ card party.

The gathering at the Phillips’s was pleasant. Mr Wickham told Elizabeth privately of his history with Mr Darcy which shocked her greatly. Upon relating this to Jane, her elder sister supposed there must have been some great misunderstanding. This could not be so and Elizabeth was glad to have reason to dislike Mr Darcy aside from his previous slight and was not entirely surprised to hear that Mr. Darcy was cold to those he once called friend as he was to new acquaintances he deemed beneath him.

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The Bennet family received their invitation to the Netherfield Ball with joy, but the rain between its delivery and the event itself put Elizabeth quite out of sorts. With only those of her immediate household for company she was soon bored, and woefully without the respite of her near daily walks. The days stretched on, but inevitably the hour to depart for the ball arrived and then passed by nearly a quarter hour, for as Mrs. Bennet claimed it was fashionable to be slightly late but they did not wish to miss greeting their hosts before the evening of dancing commenced.

Her father handed Jane and Lizzy out of the carriage and the two sisters ascended the steps towards Netherfields well-lit windows. After they had been received by the host and hostess they proceeded to the ballroom on the arm of the former, much to the latter’s distaste. Mr. Darcy was not near so this distinction given to Eliza truly had no benefit to Caroline. Upon entry into the large room, Jane was taken to line up for the first dance and Elizabeth sought out her friends. She had no luck locating Mr. Wickham but it did not occur to her to doubt his attendance. Approaching Charlotte with a smile, the two greeted each other and entered into a pleasant but routine conversation. After the first dance, when Charlotte noted Mr. Bingley had chosen to sit out to continue in Jane’s presence, the topic shifted. Before much could be said on the subject, Denny joined their circle with compliments and Mr. Wickham’s apology by proxy.As Elizabeth was expounding her feelings on the subject, Charlotte hushed her in time to receive the unexpected application of Mr. Darcy for the next set. She unfortunately had not the time to concoct a reason to decline that would not preclude her from the rest of the night of dancing.

The dance was as unpleasant as she expected, and could only have been made worse if Mr. Darcy had gone in the wrong direction or trod on her toes. As it was, he was an excellent dancer and they argued, both ending the dance incensed. Elizabeth threw to the wind the warnings she had been given both by Mr. Darcy and then Caroline regarding Mr. Wickham’s temperament and guilt respectively. Another ridiculous piece of advice issued from Charlotte, who proscribed how she thought Jane should go about her interactions with Mr. Bingley. At dinner and the dancing thereafter, Elizabeth’s family embarrassed themselves despite her attempting to hush her mother or otherwise intervene. Her three younger sisters were then disgraced by their actions or their father in Mary’s unfortunate case.

The next morning, Jane received a letter from Caroline explaining the whole party had left for London and her own hopes of staying there that winter. Elizabeth and Mrs. Bennet were united in mind on the subject, a rare occurrence, both assuring Jane this could not be so. Three days hence, another missive arrived confirming the Netherfield party’s plans for the Season. The house was not quiet as Lydia, Kitty, and Mary were inmates of it, but the mood of the eldest sisters and their parents was considerably dampened until Mr. Bennet announced to the family to expect a guest on Monday by four in the afternoon.

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Elizabeth found Mr. Collins to be as ridiculous as the style of his letter implied and would have enjoyed her father's subtle mockery of their guest at dinner more had not Jane been suffering such disappointment. It was not likely to be of long duration and Elizabeth fully expected Mr. Bingley to return within 10 days to Jane's side to dine at Longborn and resume his residence in the neighborhood. Mr. Bingley was amiable but possessed taste and judgment, regardless of the speed at which he made decisions. Jane had sent a letter to Caroline and hoped that lady's reply would indicate any changes to the party's plans for the winter.

Mr. Collins had been openly appreciating Jane's beauty and serenity since his arrival, but had attempted to include all the girls and even Mrs. Bennet in his compliments. He then had an enlightening discussion with Mrs. Bennet surrounding the details of the proverbial olive branch he intended to extend, that of marrying one of the Bennet daughters to ease the burden of his inheritance of Longborn. This was eminently agreeable to Mrs. Bennet as was his preference for Jane. As there was not a imminent promise that Jane would very soon be engaged, or indeed any assurance Mr. Bingley would come back to Netherfield, she did not discourage this. To her credit, she also did not fail to only encourage the idea of Mr. Collin's marrying any one of her dear girls, never specifying Jane, hoping to preserve the chance that should Mr. Bingley return Jane would not be engaged and unable to make a better match than a mere clergyman. She has also thought it best to advise the man not to make a hasty choice as he had a fortnight to get to know her daughters, all of whom she assured him would make him a fine wife.

He was not deterred from showering all his attentions upon Jane who bore them with patience but was nonetheless relieved when Mary would seek out Mr. Collins, if only to discuss religious topics with one who had be educated in them. Jane was no simpleton and was aware of what these attentions meant and while she would not accept a such a man to secure her own comfort, she would to secure a home for her family. Elizabeth saw this all unfold as well as her parent's passiveness towards consigning Jane to a fate with such a fool for a husband.

One evening, when the two eldest sisters were prepping for bed near the end of Mr. Collin's first week when Elizabeth breached the subject.

"Poor Mr. Collins. You are too good to distance yourself but I wonder at Mama that she has not advised him that Mr. Bingley was there before him."

Elizabeth regretted mentioning that gentleman by name as Jane's face fell and she sighed. "He is gone Lizzy and must be forgot. Caroline has not even sent a reply to my latest letter so I must assume her brother is similarly well-entertained by his London acquaintance and has no time to think of us here or returning."

"He is hasty in many things," mused Elizabeth, "but I do not think he would be so quick to take a year-long lease and leave the house uninhabited for months on end. I do not see how even his disagreeable friend could not see the waste and discourage such rash disregard for expense."

Jane begged off continuing the discussion and the two retired to the bed, but neither found sleep for quite some time as their minds were full of unresolved hopes and fears.

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This distressing mode continued through the Sunday service, after which Mr. Collins critiqued the local parson's conduct and words. Privately, Elizabeth wondered how Mr. Collins should think himself only lately ordained one to have such lofty perception of the ideals for leading a congregation. He was careful to attribute everything to his honorable patroness, but she had no more expertise in the profession having never received orders herself. Elizabeth smiled at the image of the proud, opinionated woman being in employment of any sort.

Elizabeth was even more eager than usual for her Aunt and Uncle Gardiner to arrive for their yearly Christmas visit as there was a woeful lack of sense at Longborn. Jane's tried to disguise her discontent, but despite her carefully controlled behavior and countenance Elizabeth noticed the emptiness of her smiles. Not only that, but her sister's appetite and thus her complexion had waned and she indeed seemed unwell. That Mr. Collins not to mention Mrs. Bennet took no notice of this shift sunk each farther in Elizabeth's estimation.

Even Lydia had commented on this when her eldest sister stood up from the table one evening "La, Jane you have scarcely eaten two bites!" But this statement was followed by laughter, so it was not made out of concern. Elizabeth was hoping her Aunt would bring the necessary balance and trusted she would be a valuable asset in restoring Jane.

That Wednesday afternoon, the Gardiner's arrived and were greeted by a nervous Bennet matron, and amused host. Mr. Collins gave his compliments to the whole party with his usual mixture of pride and awkwardness. His attitude towards the children was enough to have Elizabeth stifling laughter despite her concerns. He treated even the youngest at only 7 as a small adult and used large words and long sentences to the point that the children could only nod in confusion. The evening meal continued in this way.

Afterwards, Elizabeth sat by Mrs. Gardiner and quietly told her all that weighed on her mind concerning her beloved sister. "Truly Aunt, she has not been herself for a fortnight. I do not see how she will be able to have the energy attend the Christmas party at Lucas lodge tomorrow evening but she is too a good to beg off going. And yet, my mother sees none of it and does nothing to dissuade Mr. Collins. It's clear she intends the match to secure her own comfort!"

Mrs. Gardiner pointed out that to secure Longborn after Mr. Bennet's death was not nearly for comfort's sake as it was to preserve the roof over all their heads and as much independence as could be found as a widow with unmarried daughters and not nearly enough to live on. This Elizabeth could see, but she countered, why did it need to be Jane who was sacrificed?

"What would you do, Lizzy, if you were in her place? Would you be able to insure your whole family's security as Jane seems to be doing? What is truly wise and good? To marry for love of your future husband or love of your own family?"

This left Elizabeth speechless and with much to think on the next morning on her ramble. There had been so much going on within the walls of Longborn with their visitors and the constant calls from officers, having time to herself was a rare treat but her mood was decidedly pensive. She could not have the strength to marry such a man, not even for her dearest Jane. And in Jane's attempt to do so for her and all her family, her sister was fading away before her eyes. In the few novels Elizabeth had read, melancholy of the heart was usually short lived as the romantic ladies who authored the stories did not leave their heroines too long without their dashing beaus or a more honorable suitor to replace the unworthy. She was sure her father would treat Jane's distress with the same levity as her own mother's nerves, which must sometimes be a genuine burden, though much less often than she complained of it.

What was to be done?

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Jane did in fact attend the party at Lucas Lodge. As she was handed down from the carriage by Mr. Collins, Elizabeth could not but note the difference that had come over her sister in the nearly 3 weeks since the ball. Yes, Jane was still beautiful but now it was with a fragile rather than a glowing quality. Even her dress was slightly loose on her frame. Elizabeth stayed by her side and neither danced once Lydia called for The Bonnie Mode, though Mr. Collins applied for Jane to partner him. She begged a headache and assured him the compliment was felt and honored, if not in the traditional way. Mr. Collin's accepted this without much trouble expressed through a great excess of words.

In all Elizabeth's fret over Jane, she had nearly forgotten her friend Mr. Wickham who was currently dancing, and that she had intended to discuss with him why he had not attended the ball. It had been her understanding prior to that event that he had strongly implied he was looking forward to attending.

In order to give Jane some peace, Elizabeth endeavored to have Mr. Collin's as busy and as far away from her older sister. To that end, she even attempted to arrange it such that he would dance with herself and Charlotte, but it was not to be. In a show of what he believed to be romantic loyalty he refused to dance with anyone but his fair cousin Jane. Charlotte was kind to assist Elizabeth therefore in securing Mr. Collin's attentions otherwise, introducing him to her father. The two men blistered over grand architecture and it's grand expense required.

With Mr. Collin's attention secured for presumably a quarter hour at the least, Elizabeth brought Jane some punch.

"You do not look well Jane. Come let us have the carriage called."

"No, Lizzy. I'm simply a bit tired after the exuberance of the Gardiner's children. I am well enough sitting here."

Jane shooed her away. Mr. Wickham approached then and attempted to make pleasant conversation. His company was welcome but her mind wandered during their interaction. She found he truly said very little of any substance and her in attention was therefore not a hindrance to his apparent enjoyment. He even teased her at one point for not having danced yet, setting her up to receive his invitation should she wish it, but Elizabeth merely agreed with his observation.

Elizabeth heard only in the following day from her youngest sisters of Mr. Wickham's pointed attentions to Miss King at Lucas Lodge Thursday evening. This only affected her in that their complaints were frequent and frustrating. Their mother was more likely to comfort her youngest girls about the loss of one redcoat's attention than her eldest about the unwelcome attention of a man of the collar. Elizabeth was counting the hours until Mr. Collins' departure the next day after breakfast so he might be back to rest Saturday night at Hunsford and resume his duties in his parish by giving the sermon that Sunday. It could not come soon enough. Even with her Aunt's presence, Mr. Collins had become even more attached to Jane such that morning walks were abandoned in favor of being the means of distracting and distancing him from her sister as much as possible.

This was less and less effective until after luncheon, Mr. Collins expressed the wish to speak to Jane alone. Jane sat down mutely, turning white beyond her newly attained pallor. Elizabeth's protests fell on deaf ears as her mother ordered her to her room. Hot tears ran down her face as her feet ran up the stairs to her room. She closed the door quietly, resisting slamming it to hear what she possibly could from this distance which was limited to when the undoubted proposal had ended. She presumed this would be either by hearing the door of the morning room open, or if she missed that, Mrs. Bennet crowing her victory.

What she heard instead after a few moments was Mr. Collin's calling out, "Mrs. Bennet she is overcome by joy no doubt and has fainted. Once you are tending to her I will go to your estimable husband's book room for his permission."

Elizabeth rushed to Jane's side, whose head was resting on the table as she had fainted whilst seated next to it. There was no bruising or any averse signs regarding her recovery, so smelling salts were called for and a cloth to wipe her brow. Jane came around quickly, but her distress nearly became that of an emotional kind.

"Lizzy, I don't know if I can bear it."

"Oh, nonsense girl!" Mrs. Bennet countered, "you will be the means of bringing security and happiness to all your family!"

The matron rushed to the door of Mr. Bennett's study, ready to greet. The man wants there discussion was concluded. Jane faithfully recounted Mr. Collins in words. He had embarrassed himself and her as he listed his reasons for marriage the last line and the entire focus on Lady Catherine de Bourg left no room for doubt regarding who would hold the most sway in the Collins household.

After Elizabeth had been told the entire affair, and that Jane had fainted before she was able to reply, these words stuck out as a means to extend Jane's freedom long enough to find a more permanent way to secure it: "This is my advice. Find such a woman as soon as you can, bring her to Hunsford, and I will visit her."

"A visit, Jane! We must convince Mr. Collins he had better have his patroness meet his choice to give her approval before anything as binding as even an engagement can take place! Indeed Jane, it is possible that you may not need to answer at all. Come, let's go to Father."

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As the two sisters were leaving the morning room, they met Mrs. Gardiner as she had been alerted by Mr. Collin's shout and was ready to lend as much help as she could. Elizabeth hurriedly explained the pertinent details as she walked purposefully towards her father's bookroom, her arm through Jane's.

It was very lucky that her uncle was already within, it only took one look between the Gardiner's before he began to convince Mr. Bennet to consent to the visit to Hunsford by Mr. Gardiner's words. Mrs. Bennet vacillated rapidly between the desire to have a daughter married as soon as may be and the desire to herself travel to Kent with Jane. As much as she "disliked going here and there at night," it had been far too long since she had traveled. Of course, she would most like to go to London, followed closely by a seaside resort town, but even she understood that these environs were a most unlikely destination. Besides, Kent had many beauties and Jane would only add to that and Mrs. Bennet longed to see how her eldest would live the first years of her marriage, the house and all that must be changed within it. As much as Mr. Collins praised Lady Catherine de Borg, Mrs. Bennet was sure she alone knew best regarding the happiness of her daughter in the long run. She then began to push her husband to agree and although her nerves had been her husband's good friends, one can tire of even the best company and he soon relented.

To Mrs. Bennet's dismay, it was then decided that, for propriety's sake, Mr. Bennet would need to accompany Jane, and as they had not the means for the whole family to sojourn in Kent and had never had any governess with which to leave her younger daughters, she herself would stay at Longborn regardless.

Lizzy realized the lack of Mr. Collin's during the entire previous exchange and enquired of her father,

"Mr. Collins mentioned his intention to seek your blessing on his perceived engagement. Wherever has he gone?"

"Oh, is that what he came in here for? He was making little sense as verbosely as is his wont so I sent him away."

"Sent him away?! Oh Mr. Bennet, how could you?" His wife burst forth, shocked by this news out of her nerves over staying behind. "You know how much I respect him to treat him with such dismissiveness!"

"Respect him, do you? Rest assured my dear he seemed to rather be in awe and used to being sent hither and thither. Reminds him of Hunsford, eh Lizzy? But truly I could make no sense of his words and told him that under no circumstance was I to be disturbed again before supper, during which we can endeavor to lead him to come to our plan as if it were his own."

It was then decided after much discussion that the visit should be delayed until the spring, as the roads were uncertain over the winter months even on the short journey to Kent, and that would allow time for Jane to be restored to her full health and beauty. Mrs. Bennet was glad her daughter would be introduced to Lady Catherine de Burg in her best looks, as she had noticed the pallor Jane's complexion had taken on the past week.

"Oh yes, it wouldn't do to have you presented to Her Ladyship in anything but your best looks!"

"She's not the Queen, Mama, no one is being presented to anyone. Besides, Jane is not well enough to travel as it is and may still need more than our father's companionship and care come spring. I must be allowed to go as a balm for Jane."

Jane squeezed Elizabeth's hand and opened her mouth to express how what was said exactly reflected her preferences, but her Mama spoke faster.

"You go to Kent? No indeed!"

Mr. Bennet and Elizabeth both began arguing against this, but she allowed her father to carry the point. If he was to be sent on this errand; he insisted Lizzy make the third of the party and would hear none of her staying behind.

"I must ensure I shall hear two words of sense together, and as Jane is often quiet and may be still a bit ill, I will be relying on Elizabeth as we know Mr. Collins cannot provide that, nor could anyone willing to be so often in his company as the famous Lady Catherine de Burg."

Upon seeing his wife's face, he preempted more of her vocal dissent. "That is my final decision."

Although she did not enjoy the sight of her mother cowed, Elizabeth was pleased with her father for securing her spot and taking an active role in family matters. She secretly hoped the Gardiners would be able to take at least Jane back to their London home, but this topic was best reserved for after Mr. Collins departure on the marrow. Her hope was not to simply postpone Jane's engagement to Mr Collins, but to ensure it could not take place as she intended to reunite Mr. Bingley and her sister in the ensuing months.

Jane was thankful to have more time at Longborn before her, in her eyes unavoidable, marriage to Mr. Collins. It was a prudent match to be sure and would bring the contentment of security to her mother and by extension the whole family. She did not look forward to a life devoid of romance but she was willing to undertake it for the love of her family. When she had told Lizzy she would like to marry for love, this was not her intended meaning, but she also was not acting against her word. It was not in her nature to scheme or make such plans as Lizzy, their Father, and their Uncle were endeavoring to carry out for her benefit, but it did engage her curiosity as nothing had in weeks. It brought some color to her lately pale face.

"I know how much you detest communicating anything untrue Jane, but you cannot be exempted from leading Mr. Collins to our desired conclusion."

Looking up as she spoke, Elizabeth noted her sister's countenance had much improved.

"There is hope yet." She added.

"As he is easily led." Their father added. "Indeed, he seems to enjoy it in his way."

"An ideal husband, not the headstrong type!" Mrs. Bennet added, at which everyone turned to her in near disbelief and none responded.

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At dinner, with Mr. and Mrs. Bennet united in purpose along with the invaluable support of Mr. and Mrs. Gardiner, it was easily accomplished that the idea of a visit before a formal arrangement came first from Mr. Collins' own lips.

"I know, I flatter myself, the sound reasoning and natural order my patroness would undoubtedly see in such an undertaking, and indeed believe she would have suggested it herself to me if I had not left in such haste in coming to see you, my dear cousins." He chuckled indulgently to give himself an air of superiority.

They let his, If not wit then words wax long as he enumerated and inevitably repeated the advantages of the plan, which flowed forth unstopped until the sexes split after dinner.

Before anyone could settle comfortably, Lydia was loudly complaining with Kitty providing a second to her concerns even as the younger girl continued.

"Mama! It's not fair!"

"It is not, Mama!"

"It will be ever so boring here come Easter. Father should let us all go to Kent!"

"Indeed!"

Mrs. Bennet sighed, sharing her youngest daughters' concerns. "Your Father would not be moved, my love. I'm sure we shall have to find our own amusement once half the family has deserted us come Spring."

Privately, Elizabeth observed that indeed these three would be much worse off in such a situation than the group that was to travel, as they cared nothing for intellectual or productive pursuits and sought entertainment and merry company above all, neither of which was readily available when so often at home. Her mother would likely host more than she was permitted to when Mr. Bennet was here to curtail her and prevent excess expenditure. She would have to discuss this with her father to ensure they did not return to find the yearly budget ruined by Mrs. Bennet feeding the whole regiment on multiple occasions.

The three who were to remain continued to discuss their misfortune and the cruelty of Mr. Bennet. Mrs. Gardiner shared a look with Elizabeth and both decided to leave them to it, as dissuading them from their inaccurate notions would be a feat best not attempted. Despite encouraging Jane to participate in guiding Mr. Collins to come to his own resolve to leave without being engaged, she had said nothing at dinner. It had not been necessary, but it was disheartening none the less.

"Jane my dear," Mrs. Gardiner began, moving to sit near her eldest niece with Elizabeth following. "Are you feeling any better since our meal?"

She was not referring to Jane's appetite as they had all observed, or any who cared to watch, that she had eaten more than the past few days but still much less than before her disappointment. Her countenance was more serene, but not changed in any real way regarding her complexion or the fullness of her cheeks. Those would take time to be restored.

Jane understood that her Aunt was enquiring regarding her feelings towards the table conversation and the inevitable success of their plan.

"Indeed, Aunt, I find myself relieved. I have gained some months of peace."

"Some months?" Elizabeth interjected, "I should hope it will be more than that. No thanks to your efforts!" She attempted to tease her sister as she had not dared to in over a week. Jane understood that observation was mostly in jest but also a very gentle rebuke.

"Well, I shall have you tell the gentlemen I was feeling unwell and repaired to my room early for the night. This will be more effective than any attempts I might make to otherwise forward our goals."

And with that, she squeezed their hands and stood to tell her mother she would be going above stairs. Mrs. Bennet was absorbed and merely gave a distracted "Yes, my dear, rest well" before turning back to the lively discussion of what each would do if they were lucky enough to go to Kent and meet Lady Catherine de Burg.

Mr. Collins took in the room with a sweeping look, and seemed not to mind that Jane was absent, but was sure to ask after her in a most solicitous, and in his opinion, Christian manner. Although her presence was never unwelcome, the lack of it was no great hinderance to his contentment.

In the morning after they broke their fast, he took his leave of them with much ceremony, fawning over Jane and wishing her health to return and promising to think of her and write her esteemed father for news concerning her recovery, which he was confident would be aided by the milder weather that would come in some months. He seemed to think a delicate constitution a sign of good breeding,

"Miss Anne de Burg enjoys the Spring best of all seasons and the sun brings some warmth to her complexion. I'm sure it will do the same for you, fair cousin. I bid you the fondest of farewells, until we are together again at Eastertide, which represents hope and renewal. And, if I may be so bold, those ideas encompass my thoughts on our burgeoning relationship, and my Patroness's, I'm sure, once she has been acquainted with the particulars."

Jane merely bowed her head in a slight curtsy, which the other girls followed in.

"Yes, well, travel safely, Mr. Collins." Mr. Bennet had enjoyed his cousin's frivolity long enough and was eager to have him gone. "Until Easter then."

Mrs. Bennet was thankfully quiet, not prolonging the farewells as she had not yet got over her disappointments regarding her lack of travel plans.

Chapter Text

The Gardiners stayed into January and the Longborn party was a happy one, for the most part that week. Of course, there was always noise amongst the Gardiner children and Lydia and Kitty had their oft-daily spats. They visited the Lucases and other families some mornings and were visited by the officers on others. Jane was less subdued each passing day and Elizabeth's worry for her reduced in kind, allowing her mind to seek amusements and contentments once again. Indeed, when Mr. Wickham visited with some other officers, the emptiness of his discourse and conversation was not much of a detraction of Elizabeth's enjoyment of it. Insubstantial chatter was amenable, and one could grow tired of serious topics and decisions.

After seeing that Jane ate a good portion of breakfast on the third morning, she set out for a walk as she had not in weeks. The chill of the morning air was so refreshing as it nipped at her nose and filled her lungs as her breath came out in foggy puffs. Frozen plants crunched beneath her boots and the robins which were not scared of overwintering in colder climates flitted to and fro, chirping and occasionally landing near the path.

The Lucases annual Twelfth Night celebration was later that week and Elizabeth and Charlotte were busy planning. They passed out the character assignments, pulled from the Bard's play of the same name, as soon as may be as the play would be acted out for the appointed King and Queen of the Bean, Elizabeth's enjoyment would have only been increased had the Netherfield party returned. She would be more than willing to tolerate the less than amiable persons to gain Jane's true happiness, and could not deny that Mr. Darcy would be ridiculous at such an event.

Elizabeth privately acknowledged that "Twelfth Night" was not amongst her many favored Shakespearean comedies, but the opportunity to insert the annual frivolity with some novelty was irresistible. Charlotte had suggested that instead of having the guests draw their roles upon arrival, they would send out the cards a few days in advance. They had taken the opportunity to discuss their plan for a little play with the gathered group at the Phillips's on New Years'. After much thought and rereading the play, the roles were assigned.

In addition to information regarding their parts, lines, and pertinent character details, the guests were assured there would be plenty of clothes to choose their costumes from on the night of the Feast but that any additions were welcome. Lady Lucas set about the finer details of the night including the food and wassail, songs and games, and the all important cake. Mrs. Bennet set about proclaiming she should like to have a grand party and would carry it off much better as hostess.

Charlotte and Elizabeth had done their best to assign roles that played to the guest's strengths as well as honoring the tradition of allowing oneself to be entirely different and uninhibited on Twelfth Night. As such, they were confident in their choice of Mr. Wickham to portray the cross-dressing heroine Viola/Cessario and, as a balm to any adverse feelings, had assigned Mary King as the love interest Duke Orsino. They both accepted their parts and would be seen practicing their lines together in the coming days.

Kitty would portray the sea captain who aids Viola in disguising herself as man in the first scene, Mrs. Foster was assigned the role of Olivia the melancholy Lady who many are failing to court, Colonel Foster was chosen as Sebastian, the one dimensional twin of the heroine that marries Olivia, and Captain Carter would be a serviceable Antonio who follows Sebastian despite personal risk. Lydia would play Malvolio, the serious steward with hidden ambitions to raise his status through marriage, Mrs. Bennet was chosen as Feste the wise fool, Lady Lucas the quick-witted handmaid Maria, Sir William Lucas Olivia's drunk uncle Sir Toby Belch, Jane as his chosen suitor for Olivia, Sir Andrew Aguecheek, who mistakenly thinks well of himself and his intelligence. Elizabeth would be Fabian a honest servant who enjoys pranks, Charlotte took a minor part of Valentine and Mariah her counterpart Curio both serving as messengers to the Duke.

At last the evening arrived. The costumes were sorted, as was the ring and parchment needed as props. They had considered the play to be the finale, but there was such excitement around it that it was done first. There was a secondary advantage to this order, that was when the Bean was found, the Queen or King would not be precluded from the cast and another untrained understudy needed to fill in. So it began.

Miss Mary King impressed Elizabeth with her delivery of the opening lines of the play and brought unbidden to Elizabeth's mind the last person whom she had spoken of the food of love, Mr. Darcy.

"If music be the food of love, play on.
Give me excess of it; that surfeiting,
That appetite may sicken and die…
Away before me to sweet beds of flowers.
Love thoughts lie rich when canopied with bowers."

The others did justice to their roles as well. Sir William Lucas was rewarded with uproarious laughter as he delivered this line as he patted his rotund stomach,

"But I am a great eater of beef, and I believe that does harm to my wit." And Mrs. Bennet gained the same response without effort as she proclaimed, "Many a good hanging prevents a bad marriage."

In the second act, Mr. Wickham continued to amaze as he imbued each of his lines with sincerity, and had Elizabeth not known his words were written for him they would have seemed to come from his heart.

"Poor lady, she were better love a dream.
Disguise, I see thou art a wickedness
Wherein the pregnant enemy does much.
How easy is it for the proper false
In women's waxen hearts to set their forms!"

The players were tired, so after Sir William Lucas read his line,"Dost thou think, because thou art virtuous, there shall be no more cakes and ale?" the whole party agreed to have an intermission and enjoy the bountiful table Lady Lucas had arranged. The cake was set aside for after the conclusion of their little theater.

Lydia relished her time on stage, proudly proclaiming, "Be not afraid of greatness. Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon 'em… I do not now fool myself, to let imagination jade me; for every reason excites to this, that my lady loves me… I thank my stars, I am happy. I will be strange, stout, in yellow stockings, and cross-gartered, even with the swiftness of putting on. Jove and my stars be praised." Her enjoyment was evident even as her character Marvollio was supposedly grievously used, as she could not help but grin the entirety of the time she was on their makeshift stage, regardless of the circumstances. She was never one to shy away from showing her feelings.

Elizabeth was stuck with an idea when Mr. Wickham recited, "I have one heart, one bosom, and one truth, And that no woman has, nor never none Shall mistress be of it, save I alone." He was not the author of the words themselves, but perhaps his sincerity was not forced as they reflected very closely his own views.

Nearing the end, many faltered and resorted to passing a book between them for their lines. Despite this, Miss Mary King once more delivered admirably as she closed the story whilst gazing at Mr. Wickham

"Cesario, come –
For so you shall be, while you are a man.
But when in other habits you are seen,
Orsino's mistress, and his fancy's queen"

And Lydia, also on stage, lost her grin for the first time that evening as she saw how Mr. Wickham looked at her perceived rival.

Chapter Text

Jane's energy lasted well through the night, and that she had improved so materially after just a week provided Elizabeth with renewed determination, but also the less dire nature allowed room in her thoughts for the distractions of less pressing matters.

The Gardiners were set to leave midmorning on January 7th, having a day to recover after the revelry that was Twelfth Night. That morning at breakfast, Mrs. Bennett made her case to secure herself some travel. As her husband was no help in this, she turned to Mr. Gardiner.

"Oh how I wish to be able to travel as you do, brother, always coming to Longborn for the charms of the country and then easily traveling the short distance back to Gracechurch Street. And to have such comfortable accommodations!"

Elizabeth and Jane looked down to hide their respective chagrin and embarrassment as their mother praised her own hostess skills. Before either girl could think what to say, their mother continued with hardly a breath.

"You are lucky indeed, and 'tis short enough of a journey to avoid roadside inns! If I were to be able to pop in and out of town so easily, I would be sure to do so even more than your some twice or thrice a year! And we are always so happy to welcome you and exchange news. I dare say nothing can compare to the country air, but London has something else entirely! The society! The shops! The balls! I always longed to have a season you know Edward, although I did not NEED one as Mr. Bennet so eagerly spoke for me before I had been out long enough to make the plans!"

Here Mr. Bennet seemed to pause chewing as if his mouth had gone dry, and he took a deep drink from his glass to get the taste of the memory off his tongue. His lady continued,

"But all the same, every genteel girl should have her time and so should Jane. Oh, it's such a shame she will feel the same loss I do once she is married by the end of this year, whatever month pleases Her Ladyship I suppose, as she sounds so high handed! Who will think of Jane if not her mother!"

Elizabeth realized what her mother was coming to just as she came out with it forthrightly,

"I do hope you will be able to host myself and Jane in a month or so. Indeed you must. She must have her time and I must insist on accompanying her, as I shall have to be home for whoever knows how long!"

Well, that was an idea. Elizabeth had turned over the idea of sending Jane to London immediately and had even gone so far as to discuss it with her Aunt privately. They had decided that Jane's health and energy, though improving, were not yet sufficient to sustain her away from home. They had convinced Mr. Collins of this very thing and had not relied on deception, but merely forcing his notice to the obvious he was wont to overlook or ignore. But in a month's time…

"Sister…" Mr. Gardiner began in a placating, almost pleading tone and began cajoling her without committing to any plans immediately, like the good businessman he was. "We are indeed lucky to have your family so close to us to be able to visit every Christmastide and spend that season with all of you."

"And the children certainly benefit from the hospitality and cordiality of yourself and the girls as much as they can from the clear air." His wife added, looking to Elizabeth with a question in her eyes who in turn found herself receiving more than a couple such looks. How she was perceived as the decision-maker in this case she could not make out, but she could use it to her or rather Jane's advantage.

Jane shocked the whole room by taking the opportunity to speak her mind, always finding the good in people and the small bits of truth the others had been leveraging, saying warmly, "Yes, we are ever obliged to spend such merry times with our dear little cousins. They make the candles in our windows seem dull with how their faces and presence light up the household!"

The children were present and all looked adoringly at their most patient and attentive cousin, the youngest at 7 old enough to know to show this appreciation quietly for now, feeling the import of the current discussion.

"Oh, yes, yes!" Mrs. Bennet added a sincere if less guileless rejoinder, "their exuberance certainly fills the whole house when they are here!" She said this with a positive tone and, as she was surrounded by those most familiar with her temperament, it was taken in the complimentary light she undoubtedly intended.

Before Mrs. Bennet could find a way to foil her own plan, Elizabeth threw her shoulder to the wheels to speak to aid her mother in perhaps accidentally helping Jane. Or further Elizabeth's plan to reunite her sister and her admittedly flighty admirer. She smiled indulgently at the children,

"They make Christmas as magical to me as it was when I was a child! It would not be near as enjoyable without their company." She then turned towards a more delicate matter, "I do think Jane would be strong enough to not only undertake but even enjoy a small time in town and perhaps even renewing some acquaintances! I should dearly like to be there myself to see that as well as the museum and theater..."

As she drew breath, preparing to add "but" and continue lobbying for her sister's so-called season, when her Mama looked at her disapprovingly.

"Oh, Lizzy, do not be so selfish girl! You are soon to be off to Kent with Jane and Mr. Bennet!"

"Aye, leave some opportunities for enjoying oneself to the rest of us!" Lydia's petulant and confident voice indicated she assumed her mother meant to take her, for Mama had always said she would be loathe to part from her dearest girl. And what would this be if not a separation if Lydia was not included in the party. She looked triumphantly at Kitty and Elizabeth in turn over this perceived show of favor and her own pleasure.

Mr. Bennet had been ready to speak but Elizabeth did so for him. "You put the cart before the horse, Lydia. Our Uncle and Aunt have made no answer as to if they can house even two of our family." He was satisfied with this rebuttal and was amused when his favorite daughter added drily "and they have enough exuberance in their household without your presence amplifying it."

Lydia did not infer the veiled rebuke, but clearly understood her sister was denying her.

"La, Lizzy, I was not seeking your approval. Mama, shan't I come along? We would make such a merry party!"

Mr. Bennet was quick with his words and his wit, "I don't believe the house, let alone the coach, could withstand such merry-making! The noise, let alone the expense…" He shuddered for effect, "I shudder to think of imposing such scenes on my dear brother-in-law. Indeed it may undo whatever good his children have benefitted from here, if there is any. No, Lydia, you certainly will not be going to London, now or in the foreseeable future."

At this, the youngest Bennet girl whined and petulantly put her utensils and napkin quickly and somewhat roughly onto her plate in a semblance of the correct positions and stormed out of the room. Her footsteps were heard stomping up the stairs, as was the door of her room slamming shut. Kitty looked distressed but at a loss of what to say or do. Not so Mary,

"I shouldn't like to go to London even if it were no trouble."

Her mother glared at her, never practiced at subtlety. As amusing as this exchange had proven to be, Elizabeth was eager to solidify plans to get Jane where there was hope of her being in Mr. Bingley's society once more. For if her saw her again, he would be unable to leave her radiant and warm presence again.

"I do think it would be a shame that Jane not have the opportunity to enjoy a Season out before she is… left with only the, um, wholesome conversation of our cousin and … condescension of his Patroness for company. Imagine, seeking such excitement outside her estate, as it enjoys such security as to be boring to such an elevated mind." Her praise at the end was an afterthought as Elizabeth did not want Jane to feel pressed to defend those two individuals.

"Yes, and even if she did go, she would be lost without me there to show her all the best warehouses and get her properly clothed for such balls and assemblies. They are a much grander affair than those we have here, even the Netherfield ball will pale in comparison to them, Jane, I'm quite sure!"

The mention of the house swept the contented smile off Jane's face, and it saddened Elizabeth to see it. Before her sister could make a comment that severely undersold her own deserving and angelic nature, Elizabeth rushed the first few words out breathlessly as she said,

"Oh I'm sure no entertainments we have ever been privy to within our unvarying society" she internally winced at having unintentionally echoed Mr. Darcy's words, "no matter how grand the house, or how grand the hostess thought herself. But let us not dwell on bygone enjoyments when so much is open to Jane, should you be willing, Uncle."

"Yes indeed, what say you?" Mr. Bennet said as he wiped his mouth. As he had finished his meal, he was now eager to return to the peace of his book room. If he could have the Gardiner's take his wife to London, that peace would extend to their shared bedchambers. A quiet room to sleep in was something he had gone far too many years without, many nights opting to sleep in his chair before the fire of his small library, and had gone as far as to tell the small number of staff in his employ that such rest was not to be disturbed. Their supposition that he must be more comfortable in his bed was woefully incorrect when his wife was present there as they had long since passed the age at which marital activities occurred at all, let alone with any semblance regularity.

All eyes turned to Mr. And Mrs. Gardiner who were sat next to one another surrounded by their children. It was decided that come March only Mrs. Bennet and Jane would go to London as the Gardiners could truly only afford to host two and Mrs. Bennet would not be gainsaid. Perhaps her mother would be able to facilitate Jane's entering the only society that mattered, Mr. Bingley's, due partially to her lack of propriety, with more success than Elizabeth could have ever reasonably aspire to. Beyond the particulars of her mother's unique brand of persistence, her position as a Matron would allow her certain liberties beyond what young ladies could achieve.

Chapter Text

Elizabeth found herself at peace with this within a few days, surprising even herself. She had never been one to embrace monotony but she could see the wisdom, nay necessity, of the current arrangement. She would simply have to make duowith letters when the time came, and while Jane was yet in Hertfordshire to do all within her power to instill in her sister the confidence that she deserved happiness and her comfort was as important as that of their mother and sisters.The supposition that Jane may be acting to protect specifically Elizabeth had not even entered the latter's mind as she had proudly told her elder sister she would gladly die an old maid and spend any time between the present and that potentially inevitable future being of as much use to Jane as could be.

Her Aunt had left that morning but her words lingered in Elizabeth's mind. Perhaps it would be better to acknowledge her own reservations and boundaries, she would not give control of her life to a man she could never respect, but everything short of that would be done. Jane had no such reservations, but sometimes where the mind and spirit are willing, the body is weak. Even the most selfless individual's subconscious will balk at the idea of consigning oneself to decades of quiet discord at best.

Mrs. Bennet went about excitedly discussing her plans for Jane's "season" in London with anyone within earshot whether or not they were a willing listener or active conversation partner, as was not the case with her husband. The topic may have been somewhat novel, but the necessity of blocking out his Lady's effusions was a fact of life as old as their marriage itself. Unavoidable and also without an end in sight excepting one outlive the other.

It may be unchristian but Mr. Bennet hoped he would be the one liberated by a loss in the family and not the other way around as he would dearly like to enjoy his own home in peace. But such an opportunity had presented itself quite unexpectedly, Mrs. Bennet would be 20 miles away for at least the better part of a month. While Kitty and Lydia, and even to a certain extent Mary would no doubt keep the volume level within the walls of Longborn steady without Mrs. Bennet, a father was not remiss in lacking respect for his young and very silly daughters.

Lydia's thoughts were less pleasantly occupied in the month interim before her mother abandoned her. There had never been someone treated as poorly and as unfairly as she had been. To her heart, be left out of the wonder of visiting London was as good as her own death, or being disowned by her mother. She would not care if her father's disapprobation never ceased, but to so obviously lose the favor of Mrs. Bennet was a blow her confidence did not have the resilience to withstand. She resorted to pettiness towards all her family and spared not a single kind word or thought for any of them.

Kitty was wishing she were pretty or interesting, while Mary wished the same but with entirely different approaches to whether this could be accomplished and if so how to achieve the distinction of being respected and valued. Discordant coughing fits and piano sonatas filled their days through a frigid February.

---

The week leading up to Jane and Mrs. Bennet’s departure broke the stagnation, and although it was changed to frenetic energy and many complaints from more than one quarter, it was an improvement over the monotony that had settled over Longborn. Elizabeth and Mr. Bennet had never welcomed so wholeheartedly Mrs. Bennet’s lamentations of her nerves, or Lydia’s of her bleak spring. Not only was she not to travel anywhere, but Mr. Wickham was much courting with Miss Mary King, which was very vexing and she did not hesitate to tell the whole neighborhood of this, let alone her family, on as frequent a basis as she saw any of them. For Kitty, it was nearly an hourly conversation, for the women of the house every meal, and Mr. Bennet dinner as long as he could stand it. And Mary always had a new verse to solemnize regarding her sister’s preoccupation, which of itself was impressive due to the sheer amount and frequency that this occurred.

As Elizabeth finished assisting Jane in selecting what to pack and folding her gowns into her truck the night before she was set to leave, she broached the topic of the Bingleys. Attempting to feign disinterest, she mused aloud whether other ladies in London preferred as brightly colored silk as Caroline did or if that was a personal interpretation of fashion. Jane made no reply, so a more direct approach was needed.

“Jane, you know our Mother is determined to have you at every ball and event she can procure an invitation to, and fill the rest of your days with outings with the design to allow as many people as possible to see you, your beauty, and your serenity. London is large, but there can only be so many such destinations and social gatherings, I daresay you will meet with many people again unexpectedly.” Elizabeth had still been unable to be fully transparent with which people in particular as she was aware of her sister’s delicate feelings on the subject, but it was necessary to fortify Jane so that if, nay WHEN, she was present in the company of Mr. Bingley she was able to be internally calm rather than just act such. No one could act sensibly in a panicked state, not even her angelic older sister.

Jane sighed, and Elizabeth took this as an indication that her hints had been understood. That was all the response that she was given so after some long moments of silence between them, she continued:

“You must be prepared, dear Jane. I will not have you taken off guard and therefore unable to make use of such an opportunity. To wish for one’s own happiness is not shameful, indeed it is not selfish or unchristian. If our hearts are not filled with peace how can we serve others and soothe their’s? We cannot truely be of use to anyone while in misery.”

Jane smiled ruefully at this, “then I shall be happy in whatever situation I should find myself in, not only in London but in my future life. I will not let anything hurt my chances of being of service to you, all my dear family, and anyone else that may fall within my circle of influence in the coming years.”

“That is not what I mean, as you well know. If you insist upon being so obtuse I may be required to brandish my frankness at odds with your … demurity.”

“I don’t believe that is a word, Lizzy.”

The girls sputtered with unexpected but very welcome levity.

“It conveyed my meaning nonetheless. Even the bard himself created words that had not before existed when none served his purpose. Why should I not do the same?” Elizabeth said through the last of her laughter. Then, taking a fortifying breath she ploughed ahead with the topic she had heretofore been dancing around. “My hope, dear Jane, is that you shall meet a man that could make you happy and secure, hopefully Mr. Bingley as you will be in London but four weeks and that is far too short a time to plant the seed of a new acquaintance and have it grow to such a stage. You had much better revive an old one that was previously strong and do all you can to make it so again.”

Jane made no reply and would not meet Elizabeth’s eyes, but if her breath was anything to go by she was quite affected.

“Goodnight, dearest Jane.” Elizabeth said, blowing out the candle.

Chapter Text

February 29th

My dears,

Jane and I have, after a day of cold jostling in that old carriage, arrived at my dear brother’s in time for an early supper.

I had thought I would be unable to post this until the morrow, but Mrs. Gardiner had explained the London Post is much more frequent than what I am used to. London is already proving to be more convenient than even I imagined. Surely I shall have much more to praise to communicate before the week is out!

Your loving wife and mother,

Fanny Bennet

——

March 2nd

Lizzy,

Sunday in London is certainly curious and much different than in our own little parish. I do admit missing our parson’s simple sermons as the one presiding yesterday was very long winded and the children could scarcely keep from nodding off on multiple occasions.

Mother is much as you predicted, and indeed I am not surprised. She is eager to provide as many opportunities as can be for me. My Aunt and Uncle live happily and keep much to themselves, so there are no balls they have yet been invited to, much to my mother’s displeasure.

According to my Aunt there are some public balls that do not require specific invitations much like our assemblies in Merryton, so perhaps things are not so different here after all.

Do let me know how you all are at home.

Yours,

Jane
——

March 3rd

Jane,

I wish I had your patience. Our sisters are acting as I predicted as well unfortunately which means there is hardly a conversation free of mention of red coats or scripture, which is quite the juxtaposition as you well know.

Lydia tells me to write you to buy her some ribbon or lace to redo a bonnet with. Kitty says she would like a small necklace as all hers are ones you and I no longer wear. Mary would no doubt enjoy new sheet music although she will not admit to it.

Our father keeps to his book room as usual, but does join us at dinner and afterwards in the drawing room as long as he can stand to before retiring upstairs. It falls largely to me to chaperone and attempt to guide our sisters as they go visiting or receive visitors.

Do not pity me as these daily absurdities have my mind well occupied. I wish you good luck and happy hunting as you are paraded about by a proud mother. I usually disagree with her taste, but you are the most wonderful and beautiful of us all and therefore deserve the best.

Your sister,

Lizzy
——

March 11th

My dearest Lizzy, I have had some opportunities to get presents for our sisters that I hope they will like. What would you like for me to find for you? I know I have not your or fathers knowledge of books, but there are quite a few bookshops I believe you both would enjoy. If you could consult with father and perhaps get me a short list of volumes you both would like, I should be happy to see if I may procure them. What do you suppose Charlotte would accept? She is nearly as dear to us as our sisters and deserves something new.

Here we continue at Gracechurch Street to be quite comfortable. Aunt and Uncle could not be kinder or more attentive. All I lack here, dear Lizzy, is you, to make me laugh at myself.

As for happy hunting, I’m sure I know not what you mean. Yet I know you would be cross if I not tell you that three days ago, when our Aunt was going to that part of town, I took the opportunity of calling on Miss Bingley in Grosvenor Street. I was very eager to see Caroline again. And I thought she was glad to see me, though a little out of spirits. She reproached me for giving her no notice of my coming to London, and I thought it very strange that both my letters should have gone astray. My visit was not long, as Caroline and Mrs Hurst were going out. They promised to call at Gracechurch Street in a day or two.

The parks in town are pleasant to take a turn about in, although I do not think they would be to your tastes. We will be hosting some of Uncle’s associates tonight. Mother vacillates between hoping the best for the possibility of making new acquaintances and the doubt that these Londoners will be refined or worth knowing in any respect. She doesn’t hesitate to voice her skepticism toward them regardless of their being contemporaries and peers of my Uncle, so anything said against them must be an insult to him not only by social association but also anything she has said of merchants as a whole cannot but include him in it.

If we do find a public assembly will be held, I do hope our Mother will consider the varying positions in society those in London may hold, as it is not so in Meryton, during her conversations. We also have plans to go to the Museum, which I anticipate enjoying greatly. My Aunt says she goes once a year or so and she will be glad to have our company.

Yours,

Jane
——

March 14th,

Jane,

You absolutely do know what I mean.

Was mother as tactless as you feared at the dinner? How did you like our Uncle’s associates? Were any particularly interesting or interested? I’m sure men of business must have taste in order to be successful and know something of worth when they see it.

Kitty has been relegated to Lydia’s second most favored person (even when they are not arguing) as Coronel Foster’s young wife came to join her husband and the regement this week. Harriet is much after Lydia’s own heart and temperament and I cannot say I dislike her, but it is tiring to be about when they are together. I stay near in order to draw Kitty into conversation or take her with me out on a walk to help ease her discomfort. She has been seeking another confidant since Lydia listens even less to her than before and has strengthened her friendship with Mariah Lucas, who’s own brand of childishness is much more of a charming and innocent type, so Kitty and I often visit or are visited by Charlotte and Mariah while Lydia is busy with Harriet.

One advantage of Harriet’s friendship with Lydia is that she, as a married woman, is an acceptable (if not very responsible) chaperone and her presence has been invaluable. She socializes with all the officers happily and they with her, and Lydia is no longer the most determined for their attention. Together they are indeed a force to be reckoned with but require less supervision than Lydia did on her own. I relish the distance this allows me from our youngest sister and her very limited topics of conversation.

Mary is unchanged by these happenings as you might imagine. She seems to be practicing at the piano even more often and earnestly than before but without much improvement in fundamentals even if her memorization of some pieces in her repertoire is improving.

Our father subtly mocks them all, but thankfully they do not understand his meaning most of the time, which I’m sure saves much heartache on their part. I do think this tendency is amusing but unhelpful, especially towards one’s family and those dependent upon you. I have tried to discuss this with father but he merely deflects and tells me I cannot truely think his comments unwarranted and argues that if they are not understood, they can do no harm, and if they are, they can only help as our sisters are made aware of areas for personal improvement. I have not seen the latter to bear any truth as they usually wilt under his criticisms, feeling hopeless rather than determined to be better.

I thought I would be most busy watching over our sisters during visiting hours but I find they are much more likely to be upset at dinner, as mother is not there to attract fathers attention and acerbic comments. That is not to say my sisters are require any less of my mental energy than I expected, which is a great deal, so the addition usually has me exhausted by the time we all go to bed.

I think it will do our sisters good to have father away for a time, but I do recognize there could be further unseen problems when Mother returns alone as the sole decision maker for day to day concerns.

Your sister,

Lizzy
——

March 16th,

Mother,

I have met the most wonderful friend, Mrs. Harriet Foster has come to spend the winter with her husband Colornel Foster. She makes every visit more entertaining and I cannot wait to introduce you. Our Aunt Phillips is quiet taken with her and Kitty is so envious of our bond.

Since writing the above, I have heard terrible news! Mary King has been taken to Newcastle and Wickham has pursued her thence. The other officers are as charming as always, but may I admit some distress at his leaving? He had been solely focused on her but hearing his laugh was still wonderful.

Oh if only I had some dowry I’m sure I could find an even handsomer and more charming beau.

Your despondent daughter,

Lydia
——

March 16th,

Mother,

You cannot come home soon enough.

Lydia and Mrs. Foster are blind to all else when in each others company and will not allow me into their confidence. The officers also pay them more attention than me. Indeed at social gatherings I am left to my own devices and must either consign myself to the same solitary ways as Mary or find something to discuss with Mariah Lucas. She is very sweet but not the most engaging conversationalist, I must say. But she is a dear girl and has not an unkind bone in her body. Or a fashionable one. But I suppose it is better to have a friend who will easily forgive and not distract others from oneself as Lydia is wont to do.

But you still must come home and tell her it is not fair for her to ignore me so!

Kitty
——

March 18th,

My dears,

Lydia, it is wonderful to hear you have gained such a particular friend and do be sure to include your sister. Harriet sounds like a joy and I cannot wait to meet her.

Kitty, you must not always be following after to your younger sister! Mariah Lucas is also a wonderful friend, I’m sure, if not overly clever. There are many virtues. Not everyone can be as beautiful as Jane or as sociable as Lydia, but everyone has their own charms, my love.

London is nothing without your company. Jane sends her love, as do your Uncle and Aunt.

Your loving mother,

Fanny Bennet
——

March the 19th

My Uncles associates proved to be respectable individuals, quite entertaining conversations were had the evening they spent with us last week. Two of the three brought their wives and the third was a self-proclaimed confirmed bachelor even if he is yet in his prime. Mother’s disappointment with him soon waned upon another revelation, he offered to take us to a public assembly this Saturday and introduce us to his friends. He seems quite charming and assured us his friends are as well and hinted they may be solidly out of trade.

I can well imagine fathers comments and I agree they do no good for anyone.

March 20th

I have not posted this yet and have news regarding Caroline Bingley.

I waited at home every morning this week, and at length, today she came. I know, my dear Lizzy, you will be incapable of triumphing at my expense, when I confess I have been entirely deceived in Miss Bingley's regard for me. She made it very evident that she took no pleasure in seeing me. When I asked after her brother, she made it clear that he knows of my being in town, but is much engaged at present with Mr Darcy and his sister, and is in fact currently staying with them. I must conclude then that Mr Bingley now no longer cares for me.

I must find ways to be happy where I am and who I am with. Considering this, I have requested that my aunt prepare to host you all for an extra night when you come so we may all enjoy the museum together. While waiting I have not had the time to go.

Yours,

Jane

Chapter Text

A/N so they aren’t going to Almack’s cuz that would be ridiculous, it’s too exclusive. Further reading has revealed the Argyll Rooms and that some events there were much less exclusive, but not all. Anyway we make do with what we have and we ignore the rest!
—-

Elizabeth folded Jane’s latest letter, thinking of how she herself would enjoy a public assembly in London, if only to watch more individuals to practice her study of character. There were surely plenty of ridiculous attendees who would outdo even her mother in ridiculously bright silk dress to rival Miss Bingley’s. From what she had gathered from Lydia’s incessant chatter, Almack’s was out of reach but that had hardly any significance as that venue did not admit anyone from a family with a history in trade, such as the Bingleys. No doubt Mr. Darcy would have no trouble being admitted but she could scarcely imagine a place he would be more miserable.

Patience(or lack thereof) not withstanding, she finally was, upon arrival to Gracechurch Street with her Father two days after the assembly, told of how it had been from the two contrasting reports, one from each Jane and their mother. That no Bingleys were in attendance and that Kitty and Lydia would have immensely enjoyed the evening's festivities were the only overlapping details from the accounts.

Neither could be accurate regarding the degree to which Jane was noticed. According to Mrs. Bennet, there was no one as admired as Jane in the entire room, but the company of strangers and the noise within the assembly hall soon grated on her nerves. Jane said she danced no more than anyone else and had a fairly pleasant time even surrounded by strangers as she was. There were no specific partners she enjoyed more than the others, or even remembered the names of. The food was not out of the normal way but also very suitable and refreshing according to those same reports respectively. Neither included any sensible or critical observation of the general company or any individuals within it.

Overall, there was nothing noteworthy in either telling of the evening’s entertainments as they revealed more about the narrator rather than the event itself. Elizabeth was looking forward to their visit to the museum planned for the next day as it would be an opportunity to not only view the marvelous exhibits, but the other visitors as well. Artifacts were fascinating but nothing could capture her attention more than the little observable follies inevitable in every person.

Both Jane and her mother mentioned their disappointment regarding the Bingley’s, but both privately, but agreeing that Caroline had made it very clear she valued the connection not at all. Jane valiantly sought to not let their cruelty affect her, whereas Mrs. Bennet complained of it without ceasing.

After breaking their fast, the party made their way to the British Museum. It was more wonderful than Elizabeth had imagined and she and Jane often had to catch up after spending more time than their companions looking at the exhibits. Mr. Bennet was fascinated intellectually by the Rosetta Stone on display, and Mrs. Bennet was morbidly curious about the Egyptian mummification rituals. There was conjecture about the beneficial properties of mummy dust, but Elizabeth was certain those had been grossly exaggerated. Her uncle agreed, stating that for every honest businessman, there were at least 3 selling nothing but proverbial snake oil. Mrs. Bennet, of course, argued they had no way of knowing. Jane seemed in relatively good spirits, and Elizabeth was unwilling to disturb that by discussing any previous acquaintances and their despicable treatment of her dear sister.

After spending a good amount of time at the museum, they returned home. Jane and Elizabeth awoke rather early the next day for a walk in the park to stretch their legs in anticipation of a long day of travel to Kent. Along the way, after talking of inconsequential matters, Elizabeth breached the topic,

“You must not feel you have no choice but to accept Mr. Collins you know.”

“And what other choice do you see for me, Lizzy? All my silly dreams have been shown to be just that, dreams. Our reality is not shaped by what we want, but what we do with what we are given. My choice is my own and I will make it with my eyes open. Now, I beg you, let’s speak no more of it.”

Chapter Text

After leaving Gracechurch Street in the carriage her husband and Lizzy had arrived in two days previous, Mrs. Bennet directed the driver to head towards Longbourn. A short while later, before too long, she then gave the address to go visit Caroline and give her a piece of her mind. Jane had not said as much, but her mother was able to read her daughter’s hurt and genuine sorrow. It was not yet visiting hours she knew. She would wait as long as she needed to.

Mr. Bingley was settling in to his rented London townhome after spending a month at Darcy House mostly to escape his sisters and their social calls. He had been in no mood to be in company since they had joined him, and indeed had been quite displeased to learn of their quick manner of departing Netherfield and the nature of their farewells. He wrote to Sir William Lucas to ease the sting of his sisters’ impoliteness. Clearly, the money his father had spent on the seminary for young ladies had been wasted, although Mr. Bingley was unclear whether it was the fault of the teachers or the fact that it was his sisters as their pupils. He knew they both had strong wills which in and of itself was not a bad thing, even if it was not viewed by most as a desirable quality in a well-bred lady.

He was in the morning room, basking in the rare sunshine coming through the opened curtains and awaiting the post to come before attempting to see to any business in his windowless study after having left Darcy House on the 21st and spent the past 3 days trying not to mope too much. He was even less in a mood to be left alone and to his thoughts and his wishes that could never be. He knew not every young woman was afforded choice as he allowed his sisters and even fewer had the will to act against the obvious wishes of her parents. Surely, sweet Jane would not hesitate to submit herself to whatever would make those dear to her the happiest despite her own qualms. He had thought she had been genuinely happy, if a little demure in showing it, to observe his increasing attentions, and indeed she may have been pleased. But it was not because she loved him. It was because she was an angel.

The hired housekeeper entered and announced Mrs. Bennet, who before the servant had finished pushed into the room with fire in her eyes. Now here was a woman of the same sort of will as his sisters. Perhaps this is where Miss Elizabeth had gotten her streak of what Caroline quite hypocritically dubbed “conceited independence” which he had always found charming in others and somewhat intimidating in his own sisters. Despite her stormy countenance, he greeted her warmly and without guile, if not without some hidden guilt and trepidation. He was no stranger to a woman on the war path.

Mrs. Bennet skipped over the niceties of returning his greeting as well as that of discussing the weather and the health of their respective families. Instead she refused a seat and drew herself to her full height. She was by no means a tall woman, but the message this sent was not less effective due to that fact.

“Well, Mr. Bingley, you do not even deign to visit Jane in the fortnight we have been in London! No doubt your sister, who is a spiteful creature indeed, passed along her report of her few meetings with my daughter. Caroline was only too proud to be rid of the association as soon as may be. Her dowry does not put her above the daughter of a landed gentleman, no matter what her mistaken pride leads her to believe!”

Mrs. Bennet quite missed the look of surprise and even frustration on Mr. Bingley’s face. He attempted to reply, but was immediately cut off. Again, something he was all too used to.

“Besides this insult, you yourself did not even have the decency to make your farewells to the neighborhood at large, let alone my daughter! What could you have meant by it? Leaving before the rest of us had risen after standing up with her a second time at a ball at your own home. Or at least the estate you have leased. If you are able to be comfortable in a home you are merely renting, all the better, indeed it must be all you have ever known!

Oh, I shall always say you used my daughter extremely ill. And, if I was her, I would not have put up with it. I should not like to see my dear Jane with such an undeserving young man. She would have been the most loving wife and mother, and indeed she still will be! Your short influence in her life will soon be but a fleeting memory. Her heart will heal. No thanks to you or yours.

Her chances are as good as they ever were, and indeed better as they are quite nearly decided. I wanted to be sure to give her the opportunity to choose herself whom to spend all the days of her life with, but it was not to be. Yet, it gives me so much pleasure to know she will soon be in a position to be the mistress of Longbourn when my dear husband passes on, as we all must. She will be much happier than you could have made her, what with your flighty nature and rash decisions. You were never worthy of her, even if she still cries over your abandonment when she thinks no one can hear.

She cannot fool her own mother with her attempts at serenity. Her peace will soon be restored, I’m sure. She is off to Kent to secure the approval of a Lady so beyond your sphere that it is not worth mentioning to you. The eldest son of a wealthy merchant is nothing to a clergyman with such a condescending patroness, whether your behavior and visage has the advantage. He will be devoted to her as you have proven yourself incapable of being. I thank God she learned of your weak character before she was bound to you in marriage, which one can only escape through death or loss.

Perhaps she shall experience that sooner than others. My comfort is she will die of a broken heart, and then you’ll be sorry for what you’ve done.”

It was rather difficult to follow this tirade and its intended impact on his choices, as one moment Mrs. Bennet seemed to be saying Jane was better off without him while the next saying her daughter had was suffering with a broken heart. Mrs. Bennet swept out of the room and then the front door before he had a chance to rely.

Then it struck him. A broken heart. She HAD loved him. Surely a mother would know better than a disinterested observer such as Darcy. But what had she meant that Jane was all but settled? Perhaps he had better not make this decision as hastily as was his wont, nor consult his usual guides.

What was to be done?

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After putting up with Mr. Collins's incessant attentions to her sister, Elizabeth found herself eager to have a change of pace with their upcoming visit to the ever-talked-of Rosing to meet the ever-praised Lady Catherine de Burg. Her father's jokes about Mr. Collins were growing repetitive, adding to the distant Elizabeth felt towards him in light of the very real possibility that Jane would have to live with this ostentatious and obsequious toad of a man. And that her father not only would do naught to prevent it but he also seemed genuinely unbothered by that increasingly possible outcome. It was clear that he had agreed to the visit plan more for his own amusement rather than his eldest daughter's chance at a happy marriage.

While walking to church on Good Friday, Elizabeth was frustrated that she was unable to take the necessary actions to prevent Mr. Collins renewing his addresses to her sister and them being accepted. On the one hand, there were limitations due to society and her place within it, and on the other was her own intrinsic self preservation. The latter thought was as close to admitting to herself that Elizabeth could that, should she truly desired it she clouds, shield her sister by replacing her If only she could write to Mr. Bingley! But that was scandalous. Even if she could, his ear would always be turned to the advice of his proud friend.

Speak of the devil, Mr. Darcy was in the church. Here. In Kent. He must have heard her gasp which escaped her, or simply turned towards the noise of their entry as silence was kept for observance of the Holy Day, for he met her eyes almost immediately. What she saw there was confusing, not because it was incongruous but because she honestly could not work out, even remotely, what Mr. Darcy was thinking or feeling. She thought she may safely rule out joy, admiration, and mirth mostly due to her understanding of his character and general opinions rather than the enigma that was his countenance at this moment. Had his eyes always had such a piercing quality?

Elizabeth pondered what it would be like to have the ability to shape her situation, and the situations of those she loved, as easily as must Mr. Darcy. He certainly held nothing back when it came to openly sharing any of his thoughts and directing those around him. Like he had Mr. Bingley. But surely Mr. Bingley had nearly as many qualities that allowed for self determination within their society, his choices were comparatively limitless. And yet he let himself be led so cooperatively. He had once attempted to excuse his rash nature behind the guise of innocent ignorance and caprice, but he was not a stupid or inexperienced man. His choices were his alone, as were her own. It did not do to reject responsibility for them.

The congregation stood and the liturgy began, "Eternal God, in the cross of Jesus we see the cost of our sin and the depth of your love: in humble hope and fear may we place at his feet all that we have and all that we are, through Jesus Christ our Lord." She and all the congregation answered "Amen." Her mind towards her current hopes and fears for Jane. If only she could set them down, place them with another who would take care of them all. Her father did not, her mother could not.

Mr. Collins's voice did a disservice to the Passion Narrative from the book of John, yet some words stuck out to Elizabeth as they had not before. Even the Lord had to submit to His father's choices… or his own choices, as He was only part of one God. "Then said Jesus unto Peter, Put up thy sword into the sheath: the cup which my Father hath given me, shall I not drink it?'" He then worried for his mother, the theotokos. "When Jesus therefore saw his mother, and the disciple standing by, whom he loved, he saith unto his mother, Woman, behold thy son! Then saith he to the disciple, Behold thy mother! And from that hour that disciple took her unto his own home." Even the Lord had needed to care for his mother. Since antiquity mothers relied on only their sons, yet her mother had only daughters.

Those able-bodied in the congregation dropped to one knee immediately after the narration of Jesus' death, the rest bowed their heads solemnly. The cross was carried in, there was solemn singing, and veneration of the sacrifice of Christ on the cross. Elizabeth held to the cross she wore daily on her necklace with one hand and silently reached for Jane's with her other. Sacrifice. Jane did not need to be the one to save her family by giving up her life, if not literally then at least figuratively. If you had no choice and no joy, did you truly live?

Then there were the anthems and finally the conclusion. "Most merciful God, who by the death and resurrection of your Son Jesus Christ delivered and saved the world: grant that by faith in him who suffered on the cross we may triumph in the power of his victory; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who is alive and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever." The congregation joined in for the final, "Amen" and began to leave church in silence.

The next day, Elizabeth was heading out the door before breakfast for a walk when Mr. Collins came down the stairs that he was so proud of.

"Cousin, surely you are not going out!"

Her hand was on the doorknob and she was dressed for the weather. As such, rather than replying, she raised one eyebrow and held his gaze with a challenge in her countenance.

"Indeed you are not on this day, Easter Even, where we reflect upon Christ's Harrowing in Hell. In this household, these traditions are venerated, and as such we will fast and be silent until after the service."

With that he swept into his book room with what he must have thought was an air of confident authority. Elizabeth rolled her eyes, but removed and put away her outerwear, she should not antagonize the man. She figured a few mornings of discomfort would be worth it if she were able to do anything about the situation, although with her hope for Mr. Bingley being instrumental in her solution were dashed once and for all.

The Easter service was nothing out of the ordinary. The congregation was dressed brightly in stark contrast to being draped in black like the altar three days ago, which was unveiled to signify Christ's rising from the tomb. It was less moving as the words were read by Mr. Collins with his usual tone of over exaggerated piousness. The whole party was, while exiting the church, instructed to come to Rosings that evening for dinner.

Chapter Text

Mr. Collins, upon walking up the drive to the main house, could not contain his enthusiasm, “There are thirty-two gardeners, and other gardeners. Mark the windows; there are sixty-four in all. Sixty-four. And I have it, on good authority, that the glazing alone originally an excess of six hundred pounds.”

Jane replied, ever patient, “It is a very handsome building and prettily situated, sir.”

“and by no means lacking in windows.” Elizabeth chimed in. Her father smirked, Mr. Collins looked like he had taken her comment seriously, and Jane held Elizabeth’s eyes communicating disapproval and a gentle warning.

“No, indeed.” The rector continued, “and my noble Patroness is being visited by her honorable nephew Mr Darcy, who is destined for Miss Anne de Burg. They will soon be joined by his cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam, the youngest son of the Earl of Matlock. It is astonishing her condescension extends to sharing her Easter dinner with us despite her elevated company. She is kindness itself!”

Hearing Mr Darcy was staying at Rosing should not have been as shocking as it was. Why else would he be in the county with all his personal business and meddling in that of others? It dawned on her that she would be required to be civil to the man that was at least marginally responsible for the precipice Jane had been placed on regarding her future, and by extension, that of her family.

Upon entering her presence, Mr. Collins introduced Mr. Bennet and the girls to Mr Darcyand Lady Catherine and was greatly surprised they already knew the gentleman and could talk of naught else for a good 5 minutes. At this display, Elizabeth and her father exchanged a glance of exasperation and amusement respectively. She turned back to the conversation, or rather Lady Catherine who was currently monologuing about something not even adjacently relating to anyone in the room but herself, and caught Mr Darcy had been observing the silent exchange between herself and her father. As usual, she could not read his face and was left to blindly guess his thoughts as he was unlikely to speak at all if he could help it.

Lady Catherine had a commanding voice and presence, “Your cousins appears to be quite a gentile, pretty sort of girls, Mr Collins. Her father's estate is entailed on Mr Collins, I understand.”

“Yes, Ma'am, and I am, believe me—”

Mr Darcy turned as if looking for a window, but there was not one in this room, so he had to settle for gazing at a large and excessively grandiose painting. This behavior, at least, was somewhat predictable to Elizabeth. He was looking away from the principle people in a room if not a majority of the time at least as often as he could get away with it, not caring how anyone felt about it so long as it did not constitute lowering his own opinion of his behavior. She was unsure if there would ever arise a situation in which the latter would ever occur so it was surely some act of God that he spent any of his time away from windows while in company.

“Do you have other children, Mr. Bennet?”

“Yes, in addition to the two you see before you, Mrs Bennet and I have three younger daughters.” Mr. Bennet replied

“Your wife must be very responsible not to come here herself and leave the girls to their governess.” Without waiting for a reply, which was for the best as even Elizabeth knew it would not do to have her father discredit her mother in such company, Lady Catherine turned towards the sisters who were seated side by side, “Are any of your younger sisters out?”

Jane managed to speak first, “Yes, Ma'am, all of them.”

“All?! What, all five out at once? The younger ones out before the older are married? Your youngest sisters must be very young.”

Mr Bennet replied, “Indeed, the youngest is not sixteen.”

Seeing how this statement was received by all outside of her immediate family, especially as it seemed Mr Bennett disagreed if his tone was anything to go by, but had done nothing in his own house to ensure their respectability, Elizabeth hasted to add,

“She is full young to be out much in company. But, really, Ma'am, I think it would be really hard upon younger sister, that they not have their share of society and amusement, simply because their elder sisters have not the means, inclination, or suitable men to marry.”

“Upon my word, you give your opinion very decidedly for so young a person.”

Seeing this as an indication the his Patroness was displeased and in a bid to prevent any further damage, Mr. Collins steered the conversation to safer topics. Elizabeth saw this for what it was, but she had no desire to actually antagonize the man, so she did nothing to prevent this, taking as much amusement from the frivolous nature of the discussion between parson and patroness. A servant soon announced dinner was ready to be served and the whole group repaired to the formal dining room.

After the meal, the ladies and gentlemen separated. It seemed that Lady Catherine had determined to evaluate Jane at this time while Mr. Collins, with his often-repeated opinions, was in the other room. This had the added benefit of being able to interview the daughters away from their father’s presumed protection. Her plan must have been formulated based on her general understanding of paternal responsibility rather than Mr. Bennet himself as it was less certain, even to Elizabeth, whether he would be an encumbrance in such a way.

The interaction was discomfiting and, when viewed in a certain light, inspiring, Elizabeth had to work several times to curtail her instincts to defend or explain themselves, as she watched her sister questioned, worthiness decided by a woman who had heretofore unrelated to herself and her family. Jane answered each of Lady Catherine's questions honestly and with poise and Elizabeth could see at each of these responses the conversation became less and less one of estimating whether or not Jane was fit to be Mr. Collins bride, but rather in what ways Lady Catherine should anticipate benefiting her education and household management once the union was inevitably finalized.

“You do not play the pianoforte, but your voice is sweet enough to be it’s own instrument. Take care that you begin learning how to read music” Jane attempted to reply that she did already have that skill, but Lady Catherine continued heedlessly, “and practice as much as you can. Perhaps, before the wedding, you shall have time to practice with one of your sisters to make a duet.” The lady did not have any insight into the particulars of the art but considered none to be needed to give her advice. “Indeed, as one of your sisters is here you can begin at once. I enjoy music and small gatherings, so we shall make an evening of it.” Here Lady Catherine turned to Elizabeth to inquire if she played and sang, which she affirmed in such a way as to not excite anticipation of anything beyond her decidedly mediocre skill.

While communicating that Jane had met with her approval as an exemplary young lady of her station, Lady Catherine was verbose in detailing her own familial connections both by birth and marriage confident this highlighted her own generosity. Elizabeth had considered Mr. Darcy to be the proudest person she would ever meet, yet she was proved wrong as this made his pride seem altogether reasonable and just, and his interest for his friends Christian charity as opposed to what his aunt displayed which was blatant meddling.

This manner continued as Lady Catherine listed every piece of wisdom regarding managing a household she considered herself to possess, whether or not such topics would be imminently useful. “This nonsense about having no governess! When you have children, you must hire one and set aside dowries for any daughters. Your parents were shortsighted indeed not to have done so! But I shall find a suitable woman for such a position whether you are still residing at Hunsford or in Hertfordshire, I have many such connections not limited to Kent.”

Jane nor Elizabeth found a response to this. Again, the lady seemed to be content to carry on the semblance of conversation without their aid.

Mr Collins was overflowing with gratitude towards his Patroness when the men rejoined them as she told him Jane had met with her approval. Mr Darcy seemed almost embarrassed by the scene as much as Mr Bennet was openly enjoying the display. Jane did not allow this to disturb her, as she had always been able to take everything and attribute it to the good of others whereas Elizabeth was unable to do so. Their party were not allowed to walk home and that fact was oft repeated.

Chapter Text

In watching and assisting Jane with singing, Elizabeth saw fire in her sister more than she had since they were much younger. Their mother had never demanded they undertake the serious study of accomplishments or provided opportunities for them to truly become proficient if they showed special interest or talent in any artistic or musical pastime. Anything the girls learned was their own undertaking as with Mary’s piano-forte playing, or a happy accident of some natural talent like with Elizabeth’s singing. In the house, the closest thing to an artist was Lydia with her bonnets and the nearest thing to an educated woman was Elizabeth with her self-direct reading, beyond the novels Kitty favored. Jane was proficient at embroidery as they all were and patience, the latter of which was inborn but refined by the household she grew up in, especially once Lydia had learned to talk as a young child.

While Jane was very generous in thought towards others, she was unused to applying her forbearance to herself. She had never tried overhard or overlong at anything she had not enjoyed or enjoyed anything she had no aptitude for. Determination notwithstanding, she had trouble with rhythm and supporting her song with deep breaths to achieve appropriate volume. Elizabeth did her best to help, counting out loud and sometimes singing along quietly for other practices. She herself had never been taught to sing, and since Mary had taught them all the rudimentary skill of reading music, Elizabeth had no experience to draw on in her attempts to teach Jane, whose performance had not improved when it was decided she should sing in English as her pronunciation of lyrics in Italian and French was mediocre at best.

Mr Bennet was always giving false compliments, often in front of Mr Collins, which Jane flushed in displeasure at with more fervency each time. Whether or not the younger man was aware these words from father to daughter were barbed was doubtful so Jane’s reactions could be attributed to blushing with pleasure to maintain his ignorance at the very least. This fact prevented Elizabeth from defending her sister in more obvious ways than glaring at her father, or a subtle shake of her head. Mr. Collins had clearly no ear for music as his compliments seem to be genuine, although misguided, misplaced, and awkwardly given. He occasionally did manage in all his words to accidentally bolster Jane’s self-worth, as he would often incorporate the virtue of hard work as she had been devoting many hours every day to attempting to better herself.

The fire that Jane had was not one of passion or heightened interest, but rather one of building frustration and fighting against hopelessness regarding her inevitably mediocre performance and Lady Catherine's judgement of it. One evening, Elizabeth attempted to comfort her after a particularly disastrous practice session when the gentleman were out in Mr. Collins garden, saying that as Lady Catherine‘s daughter was in no way accomplished due to her personal situation, she must not scorn other young women who have had no opportunity to become so for other reasons outside their control. Miss De Berg could no more heal herself than the Bennet sisters could arrange what was needed for their own refinement. Jane didn’t really reply to this and set her jaw and wanted to keep at it, although it had been hours. Elizabeth advised she rest her voice as to not become hoarse, impeding her practice or worse her performance. She also wrote to Mary requesting her to send some simple but pretty pieces that she had already memorized in her much more advanced repertoire who obliged by sending some Mozart, Brahms, and Beethoven pieces, as well as some familiar hymns and airs that would be suited for such a performance, wisely excluding the various genres for specific dances.

Elizabeth attempted to learn not only her duet with Jane but two other pieces in addition to reviewing and polishing some simple country music she already knew, including one which required her to sing and play, although she was unsure if she would yet be able to memorize the song sufficiently to achieve that in two weeks time. If not, she mused, she would default back to a simpler piece to accompany herself. She was determined to work for her sister to have the final say in her own future, it would not do for Jane to have been so long suffering only to lose the approval of Lady Catherine. If Jane was to be denied her right, in her mind she supposed, to be the means of securing for her family happiness and comfort, the resulting repercussions in body and soul would be much greater than that she would doubtless suffer if married to Mr Collins.

Early the next morning the practice resumed with more urgency, which led as it often does to heightened emotions and so it happened that after a volley of frustrated exchanges, Jane spoke harshly to Elizabeth in a way that had not happened in years. Elizabeth had stormed off out of doors. Once she had calmed herself, Elizabeth realized she should be proud of her sister for standing up against any person even if that individual was herself. She should not be required to submit to everything, not excluding Elizabeth’s instructions which had become increasingly exasperatedly delivered as Jane failed to have the ability to follow them.

She continued her walk not only to enjoy the spring, but also to extend her respite from the tension that permeated the parsonage and her inevitable apology to her older sister, which was necessary. Elizabeth gloried in the dewdrops in the underbrush and the new growth that came with the spring and she crossed into the woods surrounding Rosings, was happy to hear the sounds of birds and other small woodland animals. She was absorbed in appreciating each leaf and each breeze so she could fill her soul with peace that would be required once she returned indoors.

As she was thus absorbed, she noticed the sound of hoofbeats and branches cracking, then a brief pause followed by a louder sound of impact which must indicate a jump had been undertaken successfully as the previous rhythm continued. Eventually, the horse came into the clearing at the far end from Elizabeth, and she noticed the rider was Mr. Darcy who met her eyes and held them for an uncomfortably long time before turning his horse around, stirring it forward with squeeze his legs and a Commanding but kind hiya. His voice was melodious and brought unbidden the thought that the voice might be well suited to song. But she has thought Jane’s speaking voice was pleasing as well, which must prove that there was not always a connection between one and the other. Until she heard it, she could not wager whether or not his voice would be displayed best advantage in that activity. She then remembered she had heard him singing at church and no male voice had been apparently jarring. She had also heard Jane nearly every Sunday their whole lives and her voice never struck her as weak at those times as it was surrounded and supported by those joined in song, leading her the right notes at timing for songs she had known since she was a girl and had therefore memorized over years without effort.

Once she returned, refreshed from her walk, she sought out Jane to make peace.

“ I know how diligent you are and I should not have expected you to be able to do what I was asking of you this afternoon. “

“It is reasonable to expect more progress and I have been able to make, but I assure you your frustration with me is nothing compared to my own disappointment with myself. This is surely only the first of a great many failures, both in accomplishments and managing a household and eventually caring for children that I must learn from as a wife and mother. It saddens me that I had no desire to expand my capabilities before now, so any suffering now is merely a result of my past poor decisions, and therefore not to be avoided or the responsibility of it relegated to another.”

“That is not so! You have the most patience in the world for myself and our whole family, combined with a genuine desire to do good by and please everyone, to think well them regardless of their treatment of you. Lady Catherine’s demanding this of you shows more about her than your attempt to fulfill it says about you, dear Jane, and besides no person is entirely responsible for oneself. Our flaws are shaped by our experiences and those around us and our experiences are largely shaped by those very same people. I begin to see that the lack of intentionality of both our parents in all aspects of our upbringing can do nothing but share in some responsibility for our not developing any talents further. Our dear Mary has been unaffected by such lack of encouragement, but such an outcome is unlikely at best. “

Jane continued to explain that she felt inadequate and that she should be able to do these things which came so easy to Elizabeth, and she assumed she must account her struggles as resulting from a personal failing with regards to effort or sensibility, the former of which she would do all in her power rectify, and the latter which she hoped dedicated hours practice would mitigate the effects of. Elizabeth maintained that to be expected to perform with any semblance of proficiency with only a fortnight to develop an entirely new skill was ridiculous in the extreme. Jane did not seem any closer to seeing things the way her younger sister did, so Elizabeth ended that discussion and assured Jane of her love.

Chapter Text

Later that day, when the polite hour came, Elizabeth was astonished that Mr. Darcy had come to the parsonage, apparently of his own volition, to introduce his cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam who was a very gentlemanly man although perhaps not the most handsome. His warmth and friendliness lit up his face so that his countenance was rendered quite pleasant despite lacking classically attractive features. After Mr. Darcy had performed the introductions, he became quiet as he had after greeting them on Easter and Elizabeth smirked to herself, wondering if he was attempting to escape his aunt because he did not seem to be enjoying himself in the visit nor exerting himself to do so or be pleasing to anyone. He glanced about the room and at all its occupants and discovered that luckily Mr Collins was not present nor did anyone move to have him called for. A maid entered offering to fetch tea and explaining to the visitors that Collins had taken his daily walk towards Rosings later than usual and so he would not be home until later in the afternoon.

While Fitzwilliam was entertaining his daughters, Mr. Bennett approached Mr. Darcy to stand near the gentleman who had taken to standing in different locations of the room. He hoped due to this proximity Mr Darcy might address him but it was simply an impetus for the austere young man to return to his abandoned seat, which was far enough removed from Mr. Bennet’s new position to facilitate polite avoidance of conversation. Mr. Bennet sensed a opportunity for novel amusement which was scarce as it had only taken a few days for him to grow exceedingly tired of the company. Surprising even himself began to miss the familiarity of his lady and their daughters and the surrounding community which held a certain charm by virtue of their regularity rather than the monotony of unchanging behavior and conversations that were inevitable in company of Mr. Collins and Lady Catherine. Niether were very complex characters and required little study, merely ridiculous in a predictable commonness which lost his interest quickly. Mr Bennet sat in the chair adjacent to and greeted that gentleman,

“Good day, Mr Darcy. Fine weather we have today, it makes me wish to go for a ride through the park surrounding your Aunt’s estate, but alas we had sent our horse with Mrs. Bennet’s carriage which returned her from London after she and Jane had stayed there in March.”

Elizabeth’s attention was pulled from her amusing conversation to pay at least some portion of it to that of her father‘s. The Colonel did not mind her inattention but rather shifted his main energies towards Jane, showing a social awareness and consideration for those around him that was refreshing and in great contrast to the gentleman Elizabeth had been in company with recently. Mr Darcy looked at her and his eyebrows made minuscule movement at the mention of the two Bennet ladies, mother and daughter being in London, but as Mr. Bennet had not seemed to mention this intentionally, he relaxed and responded that spring was always refreshing and being out in the air, one of the advantages of living in the country. Which was an amiable sentiment, if not overly original or interesting. His daughter would have gone about this in more pointed ways with a glint of mischief in her eyes, but Mr. Bennett had more experience in hiding his intentions.

“Easter is an ideal time for traveling and visiting, not only because of the holiday itself, but the weather is so mild and pleasing that carriage rides are bearable and the roads often dry comparatively to other seasons,” Mr. Bennet mused, “and that with this in mind Mrs. Bennet insisted on joining her brother, Mr Gardiner at his home in London after. She and Jane enjoyed themselves though the society was somewhat limited by Mr Gardiners business and the general appearance of moderation many feel the need to portrait during Lent. Regardless of the fashion one can always depend on visiting old friends or the museum, both of which they endeavored to do with varying degrees of success.”

Mr Darcy said “London can be disappointing even at the best of times, but the museum is not impacted by Lent as the other entertainment are.”

“I joined them at the museum, as did Lizzy. We especially admired the Rosetta Stone and the artifacts from Egypt. Mrs Bennet less so, as is her nature, and told me in great detail of the public assembly they had attended the night before, mentioning that it was nothing compared to the ball at Netherfield in company or sophistication.”

Mr. Bennet was moving towards his goal like a hawk hunting, slowly circling to make its strike precise and escape for the prey impossible. The conversation included the exchange of a few other niceties with Mr. Bennet all the while peppering mentions of things connected to the Bingleys. He was careful to do so without upsetting Jane in the current company because although he did not mind needling her in front of Mr. Collins, even he had enough sense that these gentlemen should not be dragged into frivolous teasing. Mr Darcy was hard to read, so Mr Bennet was unsure the impact of his pointed comments but ceased his efforts as
Elizabeth had him walking on eggshells and he did not want to set her against him any further.

Mr Darcy basked in the silence Mr Bennet allowed to stand for the moment before turning his attention to seeking his own amusement inquiring of both young gentlemen whether either played chess or backgammon and whether they consent to matches next time they were in Rosings, which according to Mr. Collins’ report could not be more than a few days off if the twice weekly schedule was to be maintained. This was easily agreed to.

Elizabeth made her excuses to both gentlemen saying that she and her sister had, while very happy to receive them and have made a new acquaintance, constraints on their time seeing to the task given them, to provide Her Ladyship with a pleasing musical entertainment with only two performers. As Colonel Fitzwilliam was unaware of the particulars, Mr Darcy explained then with a tightness at the corner of his lips. Once thus informed, the colonel suggested that to round out such an evening he might be able to lead them through some basic formations as calling out the ranks was as close to a song as he could get. He more seriously added that his cousin had a great affinity for poetry and could potentially be convinced to recite some which was much closer to the caliber of performance that was expected. As Elizabeth dissolved into giggles she did not see the change that came over Darcy‘s countenance, but the others did observe that his features relaxed, making the naturally well formed visage all the more handsome, with varying degrees of interest and amusement and all making their own silent assumptions.

Elizabeth spoke then “I’m sure Mr. Darcy has exquisite taste in poetry, but I do not imagine that he would put his valuable time and effort towards such frivolity.” She looked from the cousin she was addressing to the one she was discussing, the latter which found himself rising from his chair and walking a few paces forward, crossing his hands behind his back, looking down at her.

“Indeed I find my sentiments are aligned with yours, Miss Elizabeth, but as you have seen my aunt does not often take other’s sentiments into account so I had much better be prepared for the likelihood that she will volunteer me as my cousin, so kindly, has already done. And I would not wish to brook her disappointment.”

“it is always best to be as prepared as one can be for any possibilities. Which poems will you review for such a situation? Will they be Romantic or pastoral?”

Fitzwilliam chimed in, “In Darcy’s eyes there may not be such a distinction as you hold between those two subjects with how he waxes poetic about the woods surrounding Pemberly and even the sheep his tenants shepard. It has the reverence and adoration of any romance” which drew delighted laughter from all three Bennets and a chagrined expression from his cousin.

“And should I not deeply care for all that I am responsible for?”

This was a thought of such caliber that she was surprised, but she was quite sure upon hearing this that he was capable of such. Elizabeth recalled what the colonel had reported of Mr Darcy’s praise of her person and wondered at her previous assumption that there must have been some goodwill imposed by a kind listener. The others continued in an animated tete a tete and Jane’s laughter was a welcome sound even as Elizabeth was withheld from giving this her full attention being consumed by ruminating on the gentleman she had previously thought of little feeling.

After dinner at Rosings the next day, Elizabeth went to the pianoforte with purpose as Hunsford did not have an instrument. Jane did not practice in mixed company nor was she cajoled by her family to do so, and easily resisted the entreaties of Lady Catherine and Mr Collins politely declining. Colonel Fitzwilliam soon came to share the piano bench and initiated a pleasant conversation which Elizabeth was amenable to provided it was brief, especially after she was invited to use the piano in Mrs Jenkinson’s room which would have seemed ridiculous in another situation. As it was, she thanked Lady Catherine with the intention of beginning to practice daily. Jane was admonished to do the same, which she assured the lady that she had been and would continue to.

Mr Darcy approached the piano but said nothing. Elizabeth was more than happy to initiate a verbal spar and making sport of his behavior at the assembly they had met at. He attempted to explain his reservations, stating he had no talent for giving good first impressions. She countered him thus,

“I do not play this instrument as well as I should like, but I always thought that to be my own fault for I would not take the trouble of practicing”

He complimented her then, which was unexpected to her in the extreme and she found herself admitting that pleasing thought her performance may be, it would not do any good if she did not know more than a very few pieces.

“We are all beholden to the expectations of others yet it is impossible to hide one’s flaws overlong, even to those we do not know intimately.” She sighed.

“We may not be able to but many are practiced in such deceptions as you describe.” Colonel Fitzwilliam added as the tone of the discussion shifted to completative. “It is unfortunate that one is required to be pleasant regardless of personal preference or circumstance.”

“Disguise of any kind is my abhorrence.”

“Indeed it is not anything as sinister as that! If one’s preference is against dancing, good opinion could be garnered with intelligent discussion and the consideration of others’ feelings. A person does not need to be disingenuous and hide the essence of their character to be pleasant in company.”

Colonel Fitzwilliam turned away from her towards Mr Darcy such that she did not see his face but the standing gentleman removed himself from the conversation then without another word. Mr Bennet watched this all with intent but also amusement catching more than even his daughter had in the exchange.

Chapter Text

The topic stayed in Elizabeth’s mind until she was lying in bed.

What made up one’s essence? Was it accomplishments, behavior, or experiences? It must be all three. How to show that to best advantage? It must be without disguise.

Jane must not try to become someone new but show herself to best advantage. Focus on the quality of the singing, not the complexity and refinement of the pieces. She should perform something she knew and had grown up singing. She had no success sleeping and remembered her mother’s lullaby and recalled the simple and beautiful tune and lyrics translated from German (Mozart Weigeied K 350) which ran through her head:

Sleep dearest one be at rest
Birds are asleep in their nest
Forest and meadow are still
Folded the sheep on the hill
Luna appears in the sky
Holding her lantern on high
Clouds now are dream ships alight
Guarding your peace with starlight
So sleep, rest
be blessed

Elizabeth presented her idea that this is what Jane should sing to her sister the next morning, who was uncertain as a lullaby was not what Lady Catherine would no doubt expect of her as suitable for a performance. She did agree to add it as her one piece she’d sing unaccompanied as she needed Elizabeth’s support for pieces they had started working on the past week. A familiar tune and words would allow her to focus on her breath and tone. Elizabeth also added that Jane would be much more often singing to comfort parishioners or children more often in her future than in the parlors of the upper gentry. The song had always calmed her which would be welcome amid her stress. The majority of the morning was spent writing down the words they remembered from the lullaby.

Along with her own selections of Mozart’s sonatas, Mary had obligingly sent Elizabeth’s mostly empty songbook which included pieces she had worked on including Beethoven’s calm and almost soaring Pathetique 2nd movement, his Six Variations - of which she could only play the first three but she was relying on the ignorance of her audience, Clementi’s simple and pleasant Sonata op. 36 no. 4, as well as the piece she had dabbled with most recently, Mozart’s Voi Che Sapete. Jane would sing the English lyrics, which is what they had been practicing the past several days, and Elizabeth would play the accompaniment. Her original intention when she had started on the piece at Longborn had been to play and sing but she was aware her voice was stronger, making the inevitable comparison unflattering.

As she walked, she was not able to fully enjoy the nature surrounding her as she was looking over the pieces to recall the difficult portions which most needed practice. There was no pianoforte at the parsonage so her time would be limited at the instrument which she intended to make the best of. She was then taken by surprise when Mr Darcy greeted her such that she started and placed a hand at her chest nearly dropping the music. It was mortifying and she observed the tightening of his lips and slight squinting of his eyes and concluded he was silently amused and thinking all manner of mocking sentiments. She took a steadying breath, curtsied, and replied in kind attempting to seem unaffected.

Regardless of her efforts, assuring him she knew the way and recommending other paths to enjoy, he walked with her for some time. He chose to discuss music and with this her hopes of an uneducated audience died. Although he did not play or sing, he was familiar with a handful of the pieces in her book and had heard his sister play the Clementi.

“I am sure Miss Darcy’s performance is excellent and I warn you not to expect such perfection from me. Although I will endeavor to play pleasantly, you already know I have not the practice that she has dedicated significant time and effort to. You are familiar enough with the pieces to be able to detect any mistakes but your countenance is unreadable and your presence often a silent one. Thus I have no fear that your awareness will disclose these moments to others. Unless they are enough to make you speak or derail the composition in so obvious a way your aunt, with her elevated but untrained taste, will be unable to overlook them.”

“I would not have you worry on that account. Beyond familiarity with your repertoire, I consider your past performance in the art to be representative of what you will show in a fortnight.”

“Indeed I suppose it will not surprise you.”

They lapsed into a silence then and she wondered at Mr Darcy’s close proximity. He walked closely such that had not she been carrying her music in both hands it would have been expected for her to take his arm. Before they exited the wooded area to approach the house, he made his excuses and took his leave of her, turning to continue his walk. Moving into the clearing and approaching the manicured lawn, Elizabeth wondered at such odd behavior.

The next several days, Mr Darcy joined her either for her walk to or from Rosings with few exceptions. He discussed seemingly unconnected topics with her “about her pleasure in being at Hunsford, her love of solitary walks, and that in speaking of Rosings and her not perfectly understanding the house, he seemed to expect that whenever she came into Kent again she would be staying there too. His words seemed to imply it. ” (ch. 33)

When he accompanied her home she felt obliged to invite him in for some refreshment, which he had waved off until one particularly warm afternoon he accepted the offer readily. This ought to have been natural and predictable, but Elizabeth found herself ill at ease and surprised. This feeling of disquiet was amplified when upon entering the parsonage she was informed the other principle inhabitants had recently started walking into town. She had tea brought with other refreshments and served them both. Using the food and drink as cover, she let the silence linger uninterrupted by either of them for ten minutes. She was tense but observed that Mr Darcy seemed the opposite and nearly absent minded. The maid came then, announcing Colonel Fitzwilliam who then strode into the room and greeted Elizabeth warmly. She, having stood to receive the guest, inquired if he like his cousin would benefit from refreshment as the day was rather warm.

Colonel Fitzwilliam then turned to see Mr Darcy sitting in a chair positioned such that it was not in view when entering the room. He replied he would enjoy some tea in an amused tone and once she had poured his cup, she inquired after the source of his mirth as she dearly loved to laugh and had not had the opportunity in days. Fitzwilliam settled where he could observe the two others which were of course the source of his continued entertainment but he did not own this to either party and allowed the conversation to move naturally onwards without his definitive reply.

Elizabeth was quick to explain how they had come to the parsonage not many minutes past after having chanced upon one another as she returned for her daily practice on the pianoforte and were both surprised the rest of the inhabitants had gone to town. The contrast between the gentlemen’s reactions to this was comical, the Colonel was as invested as one could be whilst the other was again seemingly lost in thought rather than attending to her words. She decided to test this, adding “is that not so, Mr Darcy?” to which he merely nodded.

“We would have continued in silence no doubt but for your timely arrival Colonel Fitzwilliam” she declared, sending him a conspiratorial look.

“I well believe it,” replied he, observing his cousin, “and I am happy to provide such relief, Miss Elizabeth.”

She laughed then, and the visit continued in a pleasant manner with both of the active conversants subtly mocking the third occupant of the room, who continued on in his silence broken only occasionally by brief comments.

Chapter Text

Jane welcomed the brief distraction afforded her by receiving a letter thanking her for the gifts she had sent from London. Her joy was not dampened by the frivolous sentiments therein as she viewed it as simply the truest expression of her sisters enjoying a carefree youth which she was actively protecting. She had not had such a physical reaction to Mr Collins’s company and was gaining confidence she would be able to content herself here in Hunsford in her future life. She was also pleased with Elizabeth’s support, she thought well of people partially because she was fairly averse to those dear to her disagreeing with her or thinking her foolish and her sister’s help was proof enough that she had at least made peace with Jane’s decision. This added to her strength and her appetite was unaffected the entire first fortnight in Kent.

Her serenity was genuine but was disturbed when the day of the musical evening arrived. Breakfast held no inducement and she began practicing until luncheon, the food still held no interest. She forced herself to drink her tea and added more honey than usual for her stamina to last until the evening. The nerves which her mother often complained of must be akin to this and it was quite unpleasant indeed and she would have felt a swell of empathy had not her general state of being made her temporarily unable to do so.

Mr Collins did nothing to calm her, as he seemed possessed of the same flustered energy and was unable to keep his worries to himself. Several times that day, he would walk into the room she had taken to practicing in with self importance, bestowing what he must think to be timely advice. As the day progressed, these statements morphed from what was first somewhat optimistic thoughts such as, “it is good you sing in English so that Miss De Berg may understand the words” and “you will be sure to mark each word carefully as you said yourself one is a cradle song your own mother sang to you and all your sisters” to more realistic, “Lady Catherine will no doubt be surprised you selected a lullaby to perform for Her Ladyship” and finally resorting to communicating that he could not but expect the worst. Mr Bennet withheld any observations he made regarding the absurdity of the situation and the principal participants, including his two daughters, as for once he was able to have the foresight that this evening would impact their lives in a significant and long-lasting manner.

Elizabeth was confident both of their efforts would be sufficient but worried Jane would work herself into quite a state to make a performance quite difficult and in this vein attempted to comfort her older sister and in so doing elevated Jane’s nervous energy. Her father had been silent, which she chose to take the credit for, and no one could stop Mr Collins from speaking except Lady Catherine, and even she was only temporarily successful. She hesitated to, in an attempt to garner support, further reveal to their father that she herself was quite nearly as wound up as was Jane as she imagined this would only serve to invite his ridicule. When they all happened to be in the same room, Elizabeth suggested that Mr Collins show his garden to Mr Bennet, who had heretofore declined such a tour despite it having been offered nearly daily since their arrival, while directing a look to her father that dared him to voice again his disinterest.

“He is a scholar of the sciences and I cannot fathom why he has allowed such an opportunity to study such well-kept specimens. I imagine he will have many questions for you, Mr Collins, regarding your cultivation and care for each plant as well as your bees. Did you not mention you have begun to look into the art of bee keeping? Surely there are many fascinating details to discuss with such an educated man as my father.”

She added the final praise to add a pull for Mr Bennet to acquiesce to her obvious scheming. At least to his eyes, for Mr Collins could not see interference from anyone as anything but charity, especially if he considered them above him in station or worth paying obsequience to. When Mr. Collins had easily accepted this idea and turned his outer clothes towards getting his outer clothes from the room, Elizabeth’s father turned to her with eyebrows raised knowingly, nevertheless he did not interfere with her plans. Unsure if Mr. Collins was still within earshot Elizabeth gave this parting Instruction

“Be sure not to leave any potential question you may have unasked, father, for there is plenty of time before we must get dressed for dinner and go to Rosings.”

She trusted he would understand what she was really telling him, that he was to distract Mr Collins for as long as possible, and was then given an eye roll along with a brief nod. The two gentlemen left the house and could be seen from the windows, Mr. Collins gesticulating with sweeping motions and her father absentmindedly nodding.

Lady Catherine had sent a carriage for them all at the appointed time and all went according to plan. Before dinner, the same guests as the previous fortnight gathered in the same room as they all had many times previously. Though Jane’s singing voice had remained very weak, her rhythm and melody were carried by Elizabeth’s accompaniment, who was by no means ostentatious even in her sonatas. The Colonel alone took notice of Mr. Darcy’s expressions during the younger Miss Bennet’s performance and smirked to himself. Conversation could not be had when Jane sang in order to hear her, especially when Elizabeth ceased playing for her sister to perform the cradle song.

Lady Catherine let it be understood that she was not impressed with Jane’s voice but she also did not disregard her effort and the pertinent detail that, as a clergyman’s wife, she would never be truly expected to have the same accomplishments as the young bride of someone as illustrious as her nephew. Elizabeth stifled her mirth and schooled her expression as she glanced towards his intended, Miss de Berg who was remarkable only in her natural frailty and chronic malaise. She of course could not be blamed for her limitations preventing her from developing artistic skills but the complete lack of any opinions or knowledge could not have result from physical weakness alone. Whether this mental insufficiency was one of choice was less certain, whether the determining factor was her lack of health or expectations from her mother.

As they were all about to be called to dinner, Elizabeth noticed that Jane was waning and to avoid any unkind judgement to fall upon her sister, she herself complained of a sudden headache.

“I shall not disturb the rest of the party’s evening, but I must selfishly ask that Jane accompany me home. You will excuse us, Lady Catherine, gentlemen.”

Mr Collins looked as if he would have entreated her to stay, but his patroness instead agreed and had the carriage called with a magnanimous statement.

Jane was able to eat a bit before retiring for the night and although she stayed abed the next morning, Elizabeth brought some breakfast up to her. She ate less than usual but enough yet that Elizabeth was not overly worried as long as Jane’s appetite returned by the evening she would have no ill effects.The difference in her sister in such a few months was extremely evident, and although the fate hanging over Jane’s head had not changed, her ability to bear the burden at least physically proved to Elizabeth that Jane did not need saving but she still yearned to release her elder sister from a marriage out of necessity.

When Elizabeth returned downstairs to break her own fast, she was informed that both Mr Collins and Mr Bennet had left together to walk towards Rosings. This was indeed a surprise but as she felt she must stay inside this morning in case Jane had any need of her she was grateful that the serenity usually only afforded on a morning walk was present as the sole servant returned to her duties and no other person was below stairs. She was thoughtful as she had her morning meal. Her comfort was that if she was unable to do anything to prevent the engagement, which was unfortunately likely as she saw no way to do so, she was confident Jane could withstand it and would continue to grow stronger in herself. If this was all that was accomplished by her scheme for the Kent visit, it would be effort well spent for Jane had had months to recuperate and now would be able to endure if she was indeed to marry Mr Collins.

She settled into the morning room as she desired to be at hand should Jane find herself wanting her for either assistance or company. Settling onto the chaise after having arranged the window dressings to allow the dappled sunlight to bathe her seat, she began to read one of the very few books she and her father had brought with them. She was sure he had read them at least twice over during the course of the visit and was no doubt loathe to touch them again for months. How he would subsist without any worthy reading, as none of Mr Collins’s meager collection met their shared criteria to be considered as such, she knew not.

Chapter Text

The maid of all work entered the room and announced Mr Darcy. Elizabeth was all astonishment as it was not yet visiting hours and he had come without his amiable cousin in tow as he had before. She curtsied and greeted him politely and with some curiosity, welcoming company even of one of such a taciturn nature as she was not one to enjoy long stretches of solitude even spent reading.

“My father has joined Mr Collins on his daily trek to Rosings, it seems, and my sister is still resting. You find me alone this morning.” She explained, smilingly, while indicating he should join her in the room not caring overmuch regarding the impropriety that could be assumed, for she knew Mr Darcy had the sense to avoid gossip involving a young woman “not handsome enough to tempt” him. He inquired with sincere kindness and concern whether her headache which had indisposed her the prior evening had resolved which she confirmed by saying she felt very well this morning.

He proceeded to pace the room, only to sit a few moments in evident discomfort. He was silent save for his breathing and the sounds of his clothing as he moved in an anxious manner. She looked at him expectantly with no little undisguised amusement at such a display but did not provide him the relief to rescue him from himself by further carrying the conversation, if it could be called such. He stood again, approached the mantle, upon which he rested his forearm, before turning to her with an incredible fervor in his eyes and a determined set to his mouth.

“In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you. In declaring myself thus, I am fully aware that I will be going expressly against the wishes of my family, my friends, and, I hardly need add, my own better judgment. The relative situation of our families is such that any alliance between us must be regarded as a highly reprehensible connection. Indeed, as a rational man, I cannot but regard it as such myself, but it cannot be helped. Almost from the earliest moments of our acquaintance, I have come to feel for you a passionate admiration and regard, which, despite all my struggles, has overcome every rational objection, and I beg you, most fervently, to relieve my suffering and consent to be my wife.”

Jane felt fully recovered after a morning nap but stopped abruptly before she began down the stairs, as she heard Mr Darcy’s words to her sister, stifling a gasp of surprise. Not that she should be shocked that Lizzy was admired, for that was expected and well-deserved, but rather from whom it came. Her astonishment increased every moment as he continued pouring out his heart, soul, and even his logic in what could only be considered the second most ridiculous proposal she had ever heard of. Mr Collins had surpassed the awkwardness of the scene she was surreptitiously overhearing. Mr Darcy quieted and Jane waited for Lizzy to give one of her set-downs, a skill she had learned from their father.

“In such cases as these, I believe the established mode is to express a sense of obligation,” Lizzy began and Jane began to smile in as kind a way as can be achieved while anticipating the hurt that would result from rejection of such an impassioned suit. After an uncharacteristically long pause, she had never known her sister to be speechless or purposefully silent in such a situation, Elizabeth continued in the most unexpected manner.

“I am flattered by your sentiments in equal measure to my extreme surprise. Indeed there seems to exist between the two of us an extraordinary misunderstanding for I had come to suppose you more than indifferent to my person and I to yours. The honor of your proposal is also not lost on me nor are the extreme advantages which such a union would provide, yet I cannot in good conscience bind us without gaining a proper understanding between us and so I will accept only a private courtship. My previous understand of your thoughts and behavior are clearly misinformed and I’m sure yours are of me as well. I expect my father would laugh inwardly and mock you should you request his permission to exchange letters so I advise you not to make him aware of our current understanding, nor do I plan to disclose it.”

Jane was sure her jaw would fall to the floor and she sat down silently, leaning against the banister and continued her rapt attention on the discussion unfolding below. She heard Mr Darcy puff out an agitated breath. His tone seemed agitated in a distinct manner than it had as he declared his conflicting feelings but she did not know the man well enough to discern his feelings more precisely.

“And how, pray tell, will we come to an understanding if not through correspondence? You are to leave Kent next week and I have no current plans that would take me to Hertfordshire, excepting to court you. I am willing to do so but my presence there will not but invite gossip surrounding our persons.”

Elizabeth stirred and must have been about to reply crossly, for Mr Darcy hurried on,

“Which should be avoided due to your evident desire for privacy in this matter. Is it not so?”

“It is” replied Elizabeth tersely and sighed. There was a few beats of silence and then the sound of them both pacing. Jane smiled to herself at the similarity in the seemingly opposite characters of the two in the morning room. After another silence, Mr Darcy continued,

“Then what you have me do Madame to court you? I assure you it will be done to the best of my ability so long as I am truly given the opportunity and your sincere thought.”

“I…” Lizzy gathered her thoughts and her breath, “I should think a house party at Netherfield would put us in one another’s company, would you not agree Mr Darcy? We both know our friend Mr Bingley is an amiable host and familiar with hastily laid plans. He would not ask for any specific reason for a summer in the country.”

“You have sketched his character quite accurately, I assure you.”

Not wishing to hear any more of that man, Jane returned to her bedchamber.

After some further discussion on possible opportunities or plans, Mr Darcy bid his farewell and when Elizabeth rose from her curtsy, he kissed the back of her hand. Meeting her eyes with intensity, he quietly declared

“I shall conquer this, I shall.”

Elizabeth maintained her composure until she was alone once more, and heaved a deep sigh and let herself collapse onto the chaise. She was serious in her intentions of allowing Mr. Darcy to court her as she was not one to torment a genuinely respectable young man, even if his behavior was not always above reproof.

Chapter Text

After she had a moment to gather herself, Elizabeth recalled her discussion with Mr Wickham regarding how abominably he claimed to have been used by Mr Darcy, which at the time she had no reason to doubt or dwell on it. But that very same evening, Mr Wickham had all but given his word to dance with her at the Netherfield Ball, which had all come to naught, though it had been no great disappointment then and even less so in hindsight. Jane’s assertion that there was a misunderstanding still seemed ridiculous, but there was cause to believe Mr Darcy was at the very least much less to blame than Mr Wickham presented him to be. Elizabeth truly did not have any special interest in Mr Wickham nor he in her, so the supposed injury to his livelihood was not a matter she had pondered with much time and even less feeling but now she wondered whether that history indicated what one should expect from Mr Darcy.

There was no way to ascertain the facts so she purposefully set these thoughts aside for the time being as they did nothing to calm her agitation. She went to check on Jane, who replied to her knock saying she felt well enough and would join her downstairs.

The next morning, Elizabeth set out on a walk hoping to find clarity of mind and solitude in the woods surrounding Rosings. Not long after entering into them, though, she encountered Col Fitzwilliam. If she was to have a walking partner she was relieved that it was not Mr Darcy and she would be able to have a carefree conversation. In this too, her desires were unknowingly thwarted as Col Fitzwilliam brought the topic of his cousin into their discussion unbidden, mentioning he had extended their visit to their Aunt. Elizabeth replied that Mr Darcy seemed to like very much to have his own way and therefore ensures it at any opportunity, both in his personal matters and those of his friends.

“Oh, yes, I believe Darcy does take care of his friends. I, er, I understand that he congratulates himself on having lately saved one the inconvenience of a most imprudent marriage this past Fall.”

“And he is happy to meddle in such a long-lasting manner? I would think one would not maintain friendships well with such behavior as this!”

“It may not be so long-lasting as my cousin would wish. Indeed he received a letter earlier this week that indicated his friend had reconsidered the advice he had been given and whether it had been based on accurate assumptions in the first place.”

“His friend was able to find that he disagreed with Mr Darcy’s estimation of the young lady?”

“Well might you sound shocked, Miss Elizabeth, as was my cousin. He is confident his original assertions are correct and has worried for his friend a great deal these past few days. I believe he was finally able to pen a satisfactory letter as I saw him place it on the tray when he came down for breakfast very early with a great yawn. He must have lost sleep over it but he also seemed confident that he will convince his friend once more”

He chuckled then but noticing his companion did not seem to share his amusement, he inquired

“Miss Elizabeth, are you well?”

“Yes, yes, merely shocked to the extreme. Losing sleep regarding his concerns over his friend’s chosen bride is much outside of what I had come to expect of Mr Darcy based on his taciturn behavior, which would seem to belie an unfeeling nature. I pride myself on my ability to sketch characters accurately but your cousin has flummoxed me much this past fortnight, forcing me to continually reevaluate my estimation of him. It is interesting to be sure, but I do not like to be proven wrong, so it is a greater share frustrating.”

The Colonel escorted her to the parsonage after Elizabeth indicated she needed some refreshment and had tired after an overlong walk, blaming the increasing heat of late morning. As they approached, Jane greeted them as she had been enjoying the warmth in the garden. Elizabeth wanted to go inside to be alone with her thoughts but more so to prevent any of the topic which had unsettled her be repeated in front of her sister, and so she was forced to agree to whatever the gentleman said which she had not the wherewithal to attend to and awkwardly hurry along the impromptu visit, alternately urging the Colonel to resume his walk and Jane to accompany her inside.

Finally he took his leave and Jane followed her into the house hurriedly as Elizabeth was moving quite quickly in evident agitation. She headed up the stairs immediately rather than acquiring the aforementioned refreshments. Jane arranged a tray for her with water, fruit, and cheese and, upon knocking on their shared bedchamber door, heard her sister crease pacing and take a few deep and fractured breaths.

“Lizzy, do take some refreshment” she cajoled when the knock was not immediately answered. After a great groaning sigh, Elizabeth answered the door. Schooling her expression to the best of her ability, she thanked Jane and took the tray, placing it on the vanity near the entrance to the room, and then attempted to make excuses for heightened color and obvious agitation.

“I am merely overheated from the exercise of a walk in the late morning heat.” When this was met with a skeptical look, she continued, “Truly Jane there is nothing the matter with me! I am fatigued, that is all. You are a dear for your concern and the tray, but do not fret!”

“Lizzy…” Jane began before being interrupted.

“Oh well, I suppose I could rest a bit. That will set me to rights! Please do not trouble yourself, return downstairs, I will refresh myself and join you when I feel restored.” Elizabeth quite nearly pushed her sister out of the room and closed the door then turning her back and leaning against it while attempting to listen for Jane’s steps descending the stairs before allowing her emotions to affect her physically.

Once she had this confirmation that she was once again alone, she took the glass of water and drank deeply from it. This assuaged some of her discomfort but none of her emotional turmoil. She had always suspected Mr Darcy had a hand in the closing of Netherfield, but this confirmation coming not even a full day after she had agreed to a courtship with him to protect the very sister he had caused irreparable harm was impossible to accept. Of course logically she did not doubt the veracity of the Colonel’s report as it aligned with her first impression of Mr Darcy and assumptions she had drawn when Mr Bingley did not return. She had begun to believe that it had been her own prejudice against Mr Darcy had blinded her usual perception due, embarrassingly, to humiliated pride and vanity. But to have his character unequivocally proven to be abominably controlling and self-congratulatory was galling to her. She groaned again in frustration and felt a genuine headache beginning behind her eyes. She wiped at the furious tears gathering there, and furiously finished what Jane had brought.

Her angelic sister deserved the best. If she could help her have the choice and opportunity to get it, surely she must do whatever she could. Even if that meant attaching herself to a man she had always disliked and would surely grow to hate. She laid down and the melancholy and hopeless thoughts plagued her mind until she fell into a restless slumber.

Chapter Text

She woke up to the dim light of the predawn and could not settle again. She decided she had to write her thoughts down but could not do so in her journal for fear of it being discovered somehow and needing someone to direct her vexation towards. So she penned a letter to Mr. Darcy.

After the ink had dried, Elizabeth sealed the letter. She felt much better after the hours she had spent late into the night writing it and was more capable of logical planning now her emotions had been expressed. This was unexpected indeed, but perhaps it made her current situation much more simple as she no longer felt as if she would explode without delivering this. The merits of still handing the letter to her intended recipient were worth pondering, but for now it was nearer dawn than dusk but there were hours yet until the sun rose. She put the letter under her pillow and quickly fell asleep.

Mr Darcy stared at her throughout the service. She looked at him disapprovingly and increasingly angrily, hoping in vain he would heed her silent censure and cease. He did not. That evening at Rosings, he continued in the same manner. When Elizabeth noted men were proud of stupid, it was under the pretense that he was the merely the former. She realized she gave him too much credit and as such resolved not to give the letter to him as she could not see how he would be able to alter Jane’s future in any material way. So she herself would do all in her power to and if she was to predict her success in this based on the past few months, she figured she should give herself much MORE credit.

She had carried the letter with her as she had not yet settled on her course of action, and would not have herself unprepared or cornered by her previous indecision. His staring was less irksome once she had this resolved. She would act in a manner which will constitute her own happiness and those she held most dear without reliance on anyone outside herself.

The letter did not deviate in its purpose and was dropped before the Hunsford party left for the night. The letter found the gentleman who was much shocked to receive it and even more so after he had read its contents.

Sir,

Do not be alarmed upon receiving this letter that it should renege upon our agreement. It does not, but upon having my previous suspicions confirmed of your involvement in, nay, orchestration of my dear Jane’s ongoing heartbreak and current presumed match to Mr Collins which will do naught but worsen it, my thoughts and feelings could not be contained and I cannot speak of it to those around me without causing more pain.

I do not have anything to change about our discussion including the prohibition on correspondence. This was an urgent matter and I believe you will see the necessity of this missive. We will not have the opportunity for any private communication until we see each other again in Hertfordshire with your lately saved friend, by which time my sister will likely have agreed to be wed Mr Collins least I can devise and execute a further delay. There is no basis upon which I can imagine this occurring as Lady Catherine is much more involved and that force will not be turned aside at such proximity.

In my experience, the men I have met are quite often stupid or proud, and in some cases such as that of my cousin they are both. Many people may entertain the perhaps comforting notion that happiness in marriage is a matter entirely of chance. I have no such hope. Such a man cannot make any intelligent woman content. But perhaps joy extends beyond one’s spouse and is contingent upon their situation in life, their home and children, and their social influence. In this, Jane would, in her goodness, find this where others could not.

Yet I cannot leave her to such a fate. Therefore I lay this responsibility at your door. As you have quite the interest in your friends, you will have such in saving my sister.

Elizabeth Bennet

Chapter Text

The next morning as she was headed out for her usual morning walk, Elizabeth put her hand in her pocket and discovered the letter was missing. She turned back and searched Hunsford parsonage as quietly as she could as the other occupants hadn’t left their rooms yet. As not to disturb Jane, she did not return to her own reasoning that should her sister find the letter, she would not open it. But seeing who it was addressed to in Elizabeth’s own hand would require some explanation.

With this in mind, as well as the thought that it could have been lost between here and Rosings, she set out at a quicker pace and along a different route than usual so as to trace their path to dinner the evening previous. If she had dropped it in the carriage or heaven forbid the great house itself, there was nothing that could be done. She consequently did not encounter Mr Darcy who spent more time than he would care to admit wandering her usual preferred walks hoping to see her.

She also did not find the missing missive. Upon returning to the parsonage, she found the others breaking their fast and joined them to avoid arousing suspicion but was anxious throughout the meal. Her father and sister noticed but chose not to enquire in the present company. Their silence was no barrier to the conversation Mr Collins believed them to be having, which as usual consisted entirely of his own sentiments and voice. He barely paused his speaking to greet her, to which she bowed her head in a casual curtsy-like gesture. Once she had finished her food, which she had done quickly, she strode up the stairs and to her bedchamber. But the letter remained lost and her mind remained in a jumble.

How should she proceed? She had nothing to go on except she no longer knew the location of a potentially ruining letter. It could not but fall into the wrong hands, as even the initially intended recipient would fall into this category as she had summarily decided against delivering it to Mr Darcy. Perhaps his finding it was the best case scenario, besides the letter somehow ceasing to exist entirely, as all other potential discoverers would be disastrous if in much different magnitudes.

The colonel may be the second least dangerous person to happen upon it. At least she had an incline of what to expect his behavior to be if he were to find it as his was not a complex character and although recent experience had taught her caution regarding her character sketching abilities, she was confident yet in her impression of him. Surely he would present it to Mr Darcy in private. But the timing was less certain. Perhaps he would wait until they were traveling together to have Darcy at his mercy to tease without the respite of walking out of the room. Miss de Burg did not seem to notice much of anything, and neither did Mrs Jenkinson, excepting everything even peripherally related to her delicate charge. Lady Catherine’s finding it could be entirely disastrous. The woman was nosey without remorse and a decided meddler and Elizabeth had no doubt an unaccounted for letter in her possession would be quickly opened. As far as the servants and staff, she could not say what would occur should one of them find it but it was doubtless the most likely scenario.

They were not expecting to be invited to Rosing before leaving the county tomorrow morning. She would likely not have time for a walk and had not encountered Mr Darcy this morning as her route had been novel. Any actions she might take to preempt the letter’s discovery could also act as a catalyst for the worst possible outcome so she was forced to do nothing and hope to continue to hear nothing. Indeed it was possible the wind had caught the letter and carried it away.

Chapter Text

Elizabeth’s anxious curiosity built over the rest of the day. They were to travel back home, leaving Hunsford after breakfast on Tuesday. She had stayed with Jane but Mr. Collins had not even after returning from Rosings he went to his book room.

Jane was serene in the face of the impending discussion on becoming engaged to one of the stupidest men in England. This attitude baffled Elizabeth who had heretofore been impressed by her elder sister’s angelic disinterest but found herself unable to in this situation.

To add to her worries, after dinner Mr Collins insisted upon the separation of sexes which he had not done away from Rosings and officiously ushered Mr Bennet into his book room. At every question Lizzy asked, Jane insisted she could not guess what the gentlemen were discussing as neither had consulted her.

“I have scarce spoken to Mr Collins since we returned from our Sunday dinner at Rosings last night. Which I am not fretting over!” She added the last upon seeing Elizabeth quirk an eyebrow.

“Then he must be settling things with father. He never swayed from his initial understanding of your consent by fainting. How anyone, no matter their intelligence, could see it as such…” she trailed off, expression shifting to concern. In an attempt to comfort her outwardly calm sister she quickly reassured, “even in that case, you cannot be forced into a marriage you do not want! Do not forget you have sisters and as charming as we all are, one of us is sure to make a match that will secure the rest of the family’s wellbeing. It need not be you.” She looked down at her hands and emphatically added, “Truly, Jane, believe me.”

When she looked up to meet her sister’s gaze, she was shocked to see the emotion in it. It was certainly not relieved, resigned, or even content but rather more akin to one of their mother’s when she would insist upon something. Determined and a bit offended, even. Elizabeth opened her mouth but Jane cut her off quietly but crossly,

“I am not as naive or unwise as you think, Lizzy! You act as though you know what is best for everyone and interfere without anyone’s consent regardless of if they would wish it! My future is mine to choose and I will do so however I see fit and no one, not even you, will decide it for me.” Silence followed for several seconds. Elizabeth tried to speak but Jane merely held up her hand and shook her head. “Let us not argue about the future.” Jane stood and placed a kiss on her forehead and moved across the room, picking up her embroidery to further discourage conversation.

Elizabeth sighed in resignation and paced the room until the gentlemen returned. Her father reacted not at all to her questioning look and Mr Collins said nothing of substance as per usual the rest of the evening. While preparing for bed, Jane quietly brought over their brush and they took turns brushing each others hair, a wordless apology from each sister reaffirming their bond and trust. This calmed Elizabeth considerably but she still found rest quite elusive that night. She must have fallen to sleep as she found herself waking even before dawn.

The next few days passed with much anxiety but no news. Elizabeth was with Jane during waking hours as well as when they retired to their room. No conversations of significance occurred between her sister and Mr Collins, and their father was frustratingly tight lipped. They loaded the carriage on Tuesday without having any indication anything had changed, or the chance to visit or be visited by anyone at Rosings.

Chapter Text

The carriage ride provided no relief as neither Jane nor Mr Bennet had anything to say on the matter of Jane's situation. Upon arriving home, Elizabeth's hopes of her mother being able to draw the truth out of one of them as the marriage of one of her daughters had long been a favorite topic were dashed as Mrs Bennet instead was caught up in excitedly relaying the news that Netherfield was being prepared to open for a short summer house party. Mr Collins was not thought of, let alone spoken of. There was more to wonder at, as in her usual style of communication, Mrs Bennet mentioned something altogether unexpected and seemingly unknown to anyone,

“I was so certain he was never to come back after I spoke to him in March. Spoke to, mind you, the man had nothing to say to defend himself or otherwise. It's a wonder he is known as such an amiable man if speech escapes him in that manner, why it must have been a full 5 minutes.”

Jane looked shocked and was speechless and Lydia was laughing.

"Ma… Mama!” Elizabeth said, nearly before drawing breath, "You visited Mr Bingley in London?”

Her father was amused but at least helpful in a round about way, "What ho! Defend himself from what, my dear? I suppose a man should not be overly surprised when a slighted girl's mother descends upon him. But do tell, when was this accomplished? If he did not reply, where there other signs of how he received your undoubtedly wise words?”

Mary ceased playing, for even she could not resist such a tale.

“Oh, yes! My dear there was nothing for it. He sat there in his townhome as idly as you please but I let him know what I thought of him and indeed what the entire neighborhood thinks of his behavior. In no uncertain terms, I told him he would not be missed and was an undeserving young man.”

“Ïndeed? So what is this about his coming back to Netherfield? From what you've said, yourself and the whole community are prepared to welcome him back with open arms. Is it not so Mrs Bennet?”

"La, Papa,” Lydia cut in, “It shall only be a week and perhaps he will bring a more balanced company. Our Aunt Phillips said she heard the party would be in the area for our next public assembly in Meryton.”

“On the 12th of June!” Kitty added.

“I shan't scorn him overmuch so long as he brings gentleman enough to dance with!” Lydia finished, without acknowledging her sister's input.

“It is Christian to forgive those who trespass against us” Mary supplied.

Through this boisterous conversation, Elizabeth drew in a fortifying breath and looked to her elder sister, who had sank to her seat and looked more lost than she had in weeks and Elizabeth was unsure whether she should rejoice at Mr Bingley's return or if he was indeed too late. And if her sister were still unengaged, there was no reason to suppose Mr Bengley would seek or be given another opportunity. She was pulled from her thoughts upon hearing a certain gentleman’s name.

“Well, well, what company will he keep this time? Maybe his grand sister will deign to grace the neighborhood with her … bright presence” Mr Bennet had inquired of his wife, the conversation entertaining enough to hold his attention.

“Öh, Mr. Bennet, I do not know! Surely he must have her with him as Mrs. Long says there will be a mixed company at the house! Already, his man of business, a Mr James Langston, has arrived just this morning to set about preparing. To put on the airs of a gentleman and act as if he had enough duties as to need someone akin to a steward! How absurd.”

“I had supposed,” mused her father, “that Mr Darcy had been fulfilling that role, and indeed more, serving as a mentor of sorts. Why would Mr Bingley need to employ anyone when he already has a friend so devoted to his continued success.”

“Indeed I am sure I do not know.” Her mother began.

“Does Mr Darcy no longer intend to act in such a role any longer? Will he be present at all, do you think?” Elizabeth asked, attempting to be only as interested as the rest of the room.

“What good will Mr Darcy do at an assembly?” Kitty asked quite earnestly.

"None!” Lydia exclaimed, “Except to guard the corners of the room and perhaps keep the plants company!”

There was much laughter as the conversation continued, but no clear indication of whether Mr Darcy would be in attendance.

Chapter Text

The Tuesday after Elizabeth had returned to Longbourn a letter arrived from Mr Collins to Mr Bennet, which the latter received without much reaction and simply placed it in his pocket for latter perusal undoubtedly within the sanctuary that was his book room. Her father was a lax correspondent at the best of times, and as it had taken him a full month to even share with the household Mr Collins first, his delay in communicating any of the contents of this second missive was more frustrating than surprising especially this behavior could not be used to support either of the mutually exclusive scenarios Elizabeth could even consider as possibilities for the nature and contents of the letter. She tried many times to weasel the information from her father and even attempted to take the letter for her own perusal but had not the skill or the opportunity to do so as her father seemed aware of her anxiety and it cause and enjoyed teasing her much as he did his wife for other perhaps less realistic, or at the very least less imminently pressing worries. So the rest of April passed, with all the women of Longbourn caught up in some concern or another.

Lydia had the honor of being grouped with Jane in that theirs both were regarding their summer plans, but hers were much more convivial as she seemed to enjoy as her mother did complaining near as much as gossiping and her father’s refusal of her going to Brighton due to the cost and others of her family having traveled most unnecessarily provided an opportunity to do both, while Jane’s were not spoken of but of a much more serious nature as she could be a marriage she had a few days ago considered inevitable even though she had not officially accepted the suit of her cousin, she had intended to before leaving Hunsford but the topic had simply not come up. Whether she was engaged was a mystery, and not one she enjoyed as perhaps Lydia may have.

Kitty had not got over the slight of her younger sister or her friend Harriet for a closeness that she was not privy to and the growing frustrations of hearing everyone worth talking to only wishing to discuss on or the other of the two ladies whose accord had betrayed her.

Mrs Bennet and Elizabeth were united in their preoccupation with Jane and Mr Collins and what, if any, agreement there was, and very nearly as much the news of the Netherfield summer house party and how it could, if it indeed could affect the eldest and handsomest Bennet daughter. The matron seemingly never tired of this topic and her constant comments drove Elizabeth out of doors even more than he usual wont and even without her mother to voice these worries, her own thoughts would fill in the silence with nearly identical ones if perhaps more reasonably expressed.

One day, Lydia ran out to the garden with Kitty on her heels to triumphantly exclaim to her mother and Elizabeth that she had been invited to stay in the Colornel’s house as the guest of Mrs. Forster, as she was Harriet’s particular friend. Kitty took exceptional umbridge to this loudly and nothing of sense was said even when Elizabeth petitioned Mr Bennet to prevent his youngest from exposing herself in such a public place away from what little control her family cared to exert upon her behavior, or at least in diminishing the ill effects of them. With this besides her father’s reticence to the point of abstinence regarding Mr Collins’s communications, both in Hunsford’s book room and in his letter, led to a very heated discussion on Elizabeth’s end. Mr Bennet seemed not at all phased which only increased his daughter’s ire as she shifted to focus on a different sister than their previous argument had centered on.

“Father! This is not to be borne. Has Mr Collins made another offer of marriage to Jane?”

Mr Bennet blinked and said nothing.

“Tell me once and for all! Is she engaged to him?”

“She is not” admitted her father.

Elizabeth sighed in great relief. “And you will refuse to allow it in the future I trust?”

“I see no need for that, my dear.” Upon seeing his favorite daughter draw herself up again to resume disagreeing with him, which he was quite tired of after thoroughly canvassing Lydia’s Brighton trip, he waved her over to his desk and took out Mr Collins’s latest letter.

“Truly, listen to his words. ‘Lady Catherine de Bourgh, does not look on the match with a friendly eye.’ I will not try your patience with his missive verbatim but it seems that his esteemed patroness has decreed that Jane is not to be his wife.”

While she was very glad Jane was not tied to Mr Collins, she was met with the uncomfortable truth that her father was in no way correct in his handling of this or many other matters. Elizabeth attempted to calm her breathing,

“And does Jane or Mama know?”

Mr Bennet looked scandalized, “What? And lose what small bit of peace I will gain with Lydia’s absence? I am no fool, Lizzy.”

Without more than a glare in response, she left him. Her respect for her father was in tatters and her love for him barely intact. She was seething. Never before had she seen his utter disregard for the comfort of those he was responsible in such high relief.

Chapter Text

It came as an enormous shock when, finding her mind still unsettled after a walk and longing to discuss the whole sordid affair with someone, she found the person she most wished to do so with was Mr Darcy. As soon as that unbidden thought had come, another was on its heels and it was even less pleasant. He would not listen let alone care or help. She shook her head and had to forcefully think of another. Jane had always been her confidant and though she found herself dreading the process of renewing that bond, she in equal measure longed for it to be reforged. Turning towards Longborn, she walked home purposefully, if slowly.

Although Jane could be trusted with delicate things, she did not want to risk shocking her sister with Lydia still at home, so she waited for what seemed to be the longest week of her life. Her family’s antics were more frustrating by the day where she hoped they would be an amusing diversion, but here she reminded herself of her father so she attempted to be more engaged with her younger sisters and protecting them.

Finally, Longborn was less one inmate for the night and Elizabeth did not allow her fear to overcome her need to talk with her most beloved sister. As she was brushing Jane’s hair she began,

“Has father told you about the extraordinary news in Mr Collins’s letter?”

Her sister cocked her head and met her eyes through the mirror before replying with the smallest hint of bitterness, “No. I have not been informed of many things of late.”

“Lady Catherine has apparently rescinded her approval of you as a bride for Mr Collins. He did not renew his addresses to you not because he was resting on his laurels but rather that his patroness did not wish him to, and therefore that wish of his heart died.”

She watched her sister closely for any reaction, but Jane’s face was serene.

“You are not bound to him, dearest. You are free. Are you not relieved?”

Jane froze. She felt her body reacting: her breath sped, her face flushed. All words fled in the wake of the rage that was consuming her. Abruptly, she stood, turning to face Lizzy and snatched the brush from her hand. She felt the sudden and terrifying urge to throw it or otherwise physically strike out. Her fear overcame her anger and with tears rushing down her face she left their room with a hissed,

“Do not follow me. You do not know my wishes and you share nothing of your plans with me. Our father’s obvious preference for you must result for how alike you are regarding how you see fit to care for your family. Do not offer apologies I know you cannot mean. I will never speak to you of this again.”

She closed the door quickly but remembered the rest of the house was abed and at the last moment to muffle the click of the closing door. Furious tears streamed down her face as she realized the only place for her to go was Mary’s room. Thankfully, the middle Bennet sister was pious about being early to rise and early to bed and a fairly heavy sleeper, and her room had a comfortable enough chair that Jane settled heavily into. The next morning she would ask Hill to make arrangements to make her move to this bedroom workable, after she discussed it with Mary of course who she had no doubt would welcome her not exactly with open arms, but most willingingly.

——

Elizabeth stared at the door that had been nearly slammed by her sister. What had just happened? She felt alone and went to the empty bed that she had shared with Jane since Kitty was born. She stared at the ceiling, trembling but also numb with no tears falling, just a buzzing in her head. She must have fallen asleep momentarily because she had the feeling of jolting awake. This repeated throughout the night such that she got no rest.

In the morning, she heard her mother exclaiming loudly and Mrs Hill bustling about as Jane’s exodus from their shared room was meant to be permanent. Much ado was made about whether she should merely take Lydia’s side of Kitty’s larger bed, or if they should switch Elizabeth to Mary’s single bed. Every possible arrangement was discussed at the loudest volume possible, but then in stark contrast merely a quarter of a hour later, the breakfast table was nearly silent. She would never feel at home again.

Chapter Text

It was decided that the best thing to do would be to have Jane room with Kitty as Lydia would be gone all summer and Mrs Bennet had not been informed that Mr Collins was not going to wed her eldest so her hope was Jane would not need to relocate to another room within Longborn once Lydia returned. Kitty was pleased to have the company and Mary was thankful not to. Elizabeth felt alone, her closest sister was not speaking to her and her opinion of her father was such that Lizzy hardly spoke to him either.

She spent much more time reading and walking than even she preferred. Sometimes she and Kitty would visit the Lucas’s, Elizabeth to speak with Charlotte and Kitty to Mariah. Mr Darcy was often in her thoughts and she nearly wished to write to him simply to have someone else to talk with. Charlotte was her dearest friend but one can grow tired of the best of company when there are no other options. Well, she always had her mother but her conversation was more tiring than relieving.

May finally came to a close and Netherfield well and truly was reopened. The previous weeks had seen Mr Langston coming to and from London frequently but not staying long in Hertforshire and not paying any social calls. That did not prevent there being much gossip about his person and speculation over the guest list of the upcoming house party. Lady Lucas said Mr Bingley had written to her husband lately and mentioned that his sister would again be keeping house for him as it was indeed going to be a mixed company. How many gentlemen and ladies was not guessed at.

Mr Bingley arrived on the first Tuesday of June, accompanied by his sisters and brother in law ahead of the rest and immediately called upon the principal gentlemen in the neighborhood. After he had spoken with Mr Bennet and went on his way, Mrs Bennet was remarking to her husband what a rash man he seemed to be when Mr Bennet told her quite frankly in front of all the girls that Mr Collins and Jane was not to be. Her discourse shifted dramatically and it was decided that it was high time for the family dinner Mr Bingley had promised to attend, so the invitation was dispatched to Netherfield before the party beyond the family had arrived.

The dinner was a relief in that it would end Mrs Bennet’s speculation regarding the behavior of their guests and her own daughters, but was excruciatingly stilted and awkward for everyone involved. Jane was serene but unsmiling, Mrs Bennet was alternately chastising the Bingley’s for their inattention to social niceties when they left the neighborhood so abruptly and ignored their society when she and Jane had been in London, expressing her hope they all stay at Netherfield in a more as a permanent residence despite the previous offenses, and complementing Mrs Hurst’s appearance. She did most of the talking as Elizabeth was not able to be invested finally having to accept that she could not control other’s happiness and not knowing how to engage without that, as well as feeling more isolated than ever without the warmth of Jane’s calming gaze or the mirth shining in her father’s, as the former would not meet her eyes, and she wasn’t keen on looking to the latter. Mr Bingley’s ease in social settings was the saving grace of the evening but even he seemed uncomfortable. Elizabeth’s only respite was a petty satisfaction in seeing Ms Bingley silently seething.

The day the guests were set to arrive at Netherfield was the following Tuesday and Mrs Bennet’s effusions and complaints had reached a fever pitch, having called for her salts directly after breakfast as she had been dismayed at Jane’s behavior towards Mr Bingley both at the dinner Friday and then at church. Jane seemed cold towards him and would not be persuaded otherwise no matter how shrill their mother became.

Elizabeth slipped out for a walk to Oakham Mount and busied her mind with her journey then finding a new path to a wooded section of river not directly on her way home which was much longer of a distance than she had supposed. After enjoying the shade and the sound of the river flowing, she began to make her way back toward Longborn. The heat of the day was increasing and she did not bring any refreshment with her as the thought to extend her constitutional was not had until she was quite a distance afoot.

Her feet were sore and her throat dry. The sun was too hot on her face despite her bonnet. She was quite senseless to her location relative to anything besides home and was no longer basking in the symphony of sounds around her and did not notice the hoofbeats approach, slow, and once they had stopped the footfalls of the rider dismounting and calling her name.

“Miss Elizabeth.”

When his greeting was ignored, Mr Darcy repeated,

“Miss Elizabeth!”

She seemed genuinely surprised as she turned to him with haste, one hand resting on her chest. Perhaps unnoticed rather than ignored, then, he thought with some amusement until he noticed her flushed countenance did not fade and must not have been a response to him. After she had curtsied and returned his greeting, he enquired with more genuine interest than the enjoined usually carries,

“How do you do?”

She answered in a polite but informative way and he was unsatisfied and pushed for more details,

“It is past the time of day for your morning walk.”

She drew herself up, set on edge, “And what if it is, Sir? I shall be returning to Longborn. Good day.” And turned away from him to continue in that direction.

“Are you well?” In his urgency he sounded demanding and she whirled to face him again.

“Oh, quite well indeed!” She seethed, her physical exhaustion reducing the already slim chance of controlling her outburst at seeing him so unexpectedly.

She spun on her heel but was unsteady on her feet as she had walked too far and had gotten overheated, forcing her to sit down as she was suddenly dizzy and lightheaded.

Mr Darcy exclaimed and dismounted coming towards her. Holding out his water skin wordlessly and she took it in the same manner as she was ashamed of her display and that this assistance was rather necessary. After a few sips, she relocated to the shade of a nearby tree and leaned against the trunk using her bonnet to fan herself, continuing to drink and catch her breath.

“You will find standing and shifting from foot to foot will serve your purposes much better.”

Mr Darcy was standing nearer than she had supposed as her senses had not alerted her to movement or much else. The fire had gone out of her and she nodded, taking another sip and a deep breath before beginning to stand. He offered his hand, which she took until she regained her feet. She listened to more of his advice regarding ways to stretch and cadence for breathing to ease her over exertion and he monitored her closely. Once she was fairly recovered after more than a quarter hour she offered his waterskin back, thanking him.

“I am as ashamed of my initial behavior towards you today as I am of needing such assistance as you so timely offered.”

She looked down ruefully.

“Please do not trouble yourself.”

He sounded as if he wanted to say more but did not so she looked up and noticed his soft expression.

“Well, I should be returning home…”

“Do allow me to accompany you.”

She began to dismiss this, but he held up a hand and continued,

“You are much recovered, I grant you, and I have no doubt of your abilities but I must insist on this. Indeed, if it were possible for you to ride aside I would offer my horse…”

He sighed, “but it is not so. Unless you would prefer to wait here while I fetch another mount. My sister’s saddle would do well,” he mused, “but I do not think I would find you here upon my return.”

He apparently had dimples. She attempted to be as unaffected by his teasing affectation and handsome appearance enhanced by the expression of it.

“Why, Mr Darcy, you do not trust a word I say! It is no matter and I see you are not to be turned away in this purpose, but I must warn you my mother and sisters are all at home so perhaps you could be convinced to only walk with me as far as the edge of the woods.”

He put his hand to his heart, as her mother did so often, and with obvious enjoyment added a good deal of offence to his tone,

“What sort of suitor do you take me for? Come, I am not afraid of your family.”

“I wouldn’t have you be, Sir, but I will merely remind you of my mother’s tenacity…” She teased to cover her reaction, which she couldn't quite name, to his assertion of their arrangement.

“Oh, I recall, Miss Elizabeth.”

He offered his arm, and she took it. He clocked his tongue and his horse walked sedately behind them as they made their way to Longborn.

Chapter Text

Mr Darcy’s visit went as well as could be expected. Mrs Bennet was clearly surprised that he arrived with Elizabeth but not much pleased as her opinion of him had not changed since his refusal to deign to dance with her daughters the first assembly he was in town. As such, she treated him with cool civility and clipped responses even when he proved to be well-informed on the particulars regarding the guests expected tomorrow at Netherfield. She felt she had acted as a welcoming hostess, gathered valuable gossip, and supported her daughter by showing she did not care for the wealth of a man if he slighted her Lizzy. When he left, she said as much to her daughter before setting out to spread the news to Lady Lucas.

Lydia had heard the first two names, Colonels Fitzwilliam and Ash, and her attention was not kept further. Her mother and Elizabeth heard the latter’s sister, Lavinia Ash, the only daughter of the Baron Burnham, mentioned as well as Mr Langston who it seemed was an odd addition as his connection to the Bingley’s was from their past in trade but seemed both a friend and an advisor.

Elizabeth was rather surprised that Mr Darcy had brought his sister, Georgiana. He did mention in passing his knowledge of the militia’s removal from the vicinity so he must have been satisfied of her safety and relative comfort at Netherfield for the planned two weeks visit.

Jane, for her part, was unobtrusive and listened rather than engaged, while attempting to feel the serenity she so often displayed. The additional guests would stay for ten days and would be seen at the assembly. Miss Ashburn was a hindrance to this calm, as Mr Darcy spoke highly of her which in itself was to be wondered at, but in such matter-of-fact way that it was obvious there was no affection towards her but viewed her as a model of gentility for his sister.

If the Darcy’s were hosting, Jane mused, this would have been reason enough for her presence. But Mr Bingley was master of Netherfield, if only by lease, and would have had a hand in guest selection more so than the visitors. Perhaps she was Caroline’s particular friend. Here she stopped herself. Why should she care about the single female company Mr Bingley chose to keep? She ought to be more preoccupied that Lizzy had arrived on Mr Darcy’s arm. But she could not control her heart as much as she could her thoughts.

The next morning, Elizabeth was prevented from taking her normal morning walk by a passing rain. It did not last, and though the skies cleared her mood remained cloudy through most of the day. She had less patience than usual when Aunt Phillips visited once the fleeting storm had passed but was grateful she remained their only caller as she stayed the entire morning gossiping with Mrs. Bennet. Although she could not find any of the customary amusement of watching the two concoct their own reality about themselves which was ever changing, Elizabeth stayed in the parlor partially for Jane’s sake as Mr Collins and Mr Bingley were ever favored topics. She also could not bring herself to withdraw as there was a chance, admittedly a very small one, that there would be news.

The older women rapidly changed their opinions even more so than was their usual wont regarding the two men who they perceived as Jane’s suitors as well as which match was best. Their discussion did not center on compatibility but rather the more material aspects which inevitably contribute to happiness in marriage such as the size of the house and staff, the larger neighborhood and society, and how those in it perceived the hypothetical husband. Mr Collins was commended for his peacemaking attempts but scorned for his indecisiveness, while his deference to such a great lady and Catherine de Bourg was alternately praiseworthy and a hindrance. Jane did not seem to need to hide any sensitive emotions during that discussion, but when Mr Bingley was thus analyzed she began to shift uncomfortably and even momentarily quit the room, excusing her behavior stating it was time for tea and that she intended to serve them all.

During her absence, Mrs Bennet said, “I visited him in London, you know Sister, and he had nothing to say for himself! Nothing at all. And now he is back again and even I do not know what to think of it! I would be quite happy to receive him still, and indeed I did welcome the family party to a small dinner not three days hence, if he would prove more steady. He seems quite unchanged, still as pleasant as can be in whatever company he keeps, which is of course a perfectly gentlemanly quality. But when I think of this winter, Sister, how capricious his character must still be! I cannot be easy until I see that settled.”

Mrs Phillips agreed, “Aye, sister. I always suspected his ease in a new neighborhood could only mean he was always going about here and there, being introduced to strangers more than any properly settled and steady gentleman would have cause to. Mr Bingley may not ever stay long enough in one house to become a fixture in a local society!”

Amid their mother’s effusive nods, Jane returned with all that was needed to serve tea to the small gathering. Kitty had gone to the Lucases and Mary was practicing at the pianoforte. Upon hearing Mr Bingley’s name she stopped and turned away.

“I should not neglect dear Mary, I will go take her a cup.”

“She has still not regained her equanimity about him,” said Mrs Bennet, “and I cannot say that I blame her, Sister. When he was dining with us, she spoke only a little. The only one quieter at the table was Mr Darcy, if you would believe it. Oh! Sister! Did I tell you that Mr Darcy himself visited yesterday? Lizzy, you came in from your walk on his arm, you clever thing!”

Aunt Phillips was in raptures despite Elizabeth’s assurances that he was merely behaving as any gentleman should. Jane returned again and could withstand easily the discussion of Mr Darcy’s merits as her closest sister could not. The tea was served and then the tray was again the cover for escaping a discussion of one’s suitor.
“I will take father his tea,” Elizabeth said and went to the bookroom. So great was her hurry that she neglected to knock and unceremoniously burst through the door. Her father was reading, unsurprisingly, but he held correspondence rather than a book or newspaper. He started and began to put it away in a hurried manner, all while chiding her.

“Lizzy, knock before entering this room! It is my only sanctuary in this house!” His tone was more harsh than he regularly used with her and along with the flustered motion of stuffing the letter out of sight piqued her interest.

“I… Father, I did not mean to disrupt your privacy but it was not as simple as to knock” she indicated with her chin to the tea tray in her hands and attempted a wry smile, “would you like you tea as usual, or will it also be bitter today?”

He did not soften at her attempt at humor but did thank her for bringing him refreshment and fell silent as she prepared his tea as he always took it. After a sip, he sighed.

“Your aunt and mother are having quite a pleasant visit, it would seem.” His expression slowly lost it’s hardness and gained a far away nearly sorrowful expression, “well at least they can find amusement in these events.”

“These events, sir?” Elizabeth probed. Mr Bennet shifted uncomfortably under her enquiring gaze and did not reply for a protracted moment. “You do not often have correspondents.” He looked away for her.

“Indeed I do not.”

“You have news, father.” Elizabeth stated rather than asking. He nodded at her in a distracted manner. She stood and put out her hand, “Well, if you will not tell me, allow me to read it for myself.”

He set down his cup while rubbing his other hand down his face in slight agitation before taking the letter out from where he had concealed it.

“If you must read it, take it with you. You will want to be away from your mother and sisters and I would like my bookroom back to myself.” He rose and walked to the door, handing her the letter only as she was leaving. “I’ll call for Hill to get the tea tray,” he said as he closed the door on her.

Chapter Text

My Dear Cousin Bennet,

I write to express my deepest gratitude both for your visit to Hunsford with your daughters and your prudent suggestion of it. Regrettably, I had not fully resolved on the details of how to move forward with making amends to you and your amiable wife and daughters before you took your leave of me these past weeks. My noble patroness was concerned after Miss Bennet’s charming performance, that she would not be well suited to the rigors of the life of a rector's wife and no longer looks on the match with a friendly eye. 

This could not fully dissuade me, however, until I chanced upon Mr Darcy reading a letter as I was leaving Rosings the next day. He then provided me with such Christian solicitude, eloquently detailing that Lady Catherine will require many evenings of entertainment and that it would greatly benefit the felicity of my situation to take a great deal of care that I obtain a wife with such accomplishments as to fill the halls of Rosings Park with music. Do not be offended, Sir, he meant no slight to Miss Bennet, indeed he complimented her delicacy and the feeling she poured into her singing. 

Privately I considered her performance and preparation exemplary but it could not be said to have sufficient volume to fill such a grand space and decided I could not with satisfaction continue. It gave me great pain to part with you as I was thus absorbed as I had not reconciled with the notion of finding a bride elsewhere. 

Again it was Mr Darcy whose astute advice shows his aunt’s hand in his air and generosity who brought the solution to my attention. He recalled that all of your daughters are out and Miss Mary in particular is the most accomplished pianist in her circle and well able and indeed accustomed to providing such entertainment. I admit to noticing her enjoyment of performing and her devotion to practicing while staying with you at Longborn.

I now come to the point. Although I had previously made an offer to the eldest Miss Bennet, I must immediately release her. Please do pass on my deepest regret as to have caused her the inevitable pain this news will bring, but I flatter myself in my understanding that hers is a character that will forgive in a most Christian way and be able to fully congratulate her sister.

Included is a letter I have written to my dear cousin Mary, which I hope you will allow her to read, explaining to her my wishes for her to agree to become my wife. With your blessing, I would like to correspond with her throughout our engagement. No doubt she will wish to be married from Longborn and as my duty is here I will not be able to visit her for long. As my duties as a clergyman will be greatly aided by her as my wife I wish for as short of an engagement as she and your estimable wife will allow without drawing undue attention. Perhaps six weeks. When I shared that I was to write this to you, Mr Darcy most generously offered to ensure a piano forte is purchased for my humble abode as a wedding gift.

Please respond regarding the length of engagement, unless you allow my dear cousin Mary the honor of communicating that happy news.

Yours,

William Collins

Chapter Text

Elizabeth sat in her room stunned into stillness for some minutes. Rereading the letter Mr Collins had written to her father did not provide any calm, what was he about thinking to switch one Bennet sister for another? It was true that Mary seemed to hold him esteem and listened to his near never-ending speeches with rapt attention, so she had no doubt that the match would be not a burden for her sister. But to be singled out only after Jane?

The letter was dated late April, so it was the very letter Mr Bennet had received shortly after they returned home. That was six weeks past! Mr Bennet had not given her the letter for Mary. Had he given it to her sister? Had he even replied to Mr Collins? Mrs Bennet would never get over the loss of a chance at one of her daughters being mistress of Longborn, and in a certain light it was the best way to ensure her daughters and herself were provided for once she became a widow.

Shaking her head, she stood to look out the window which faced in the direction of Netherfield. Mr Collins was a fool and her father a terrible correspondent, this was no surprise. But Mr Darcy’s actions? She did not know whether to be thankful or furious. He was meddling in her sister’s life again! Not that she had any complaints regarding the outcome as Jane would never be Mrs Collins thanks to his actions. Mary had always hung on Mr Collins’s words and would enjoy the distinction given to her and her musical accomplishments. Indeed, she would have arranged it thus herself, protecting Longborn and her mother without making anyone miserable. Well, she supposed, happiness in marriage isn’t precisely chance but it is unpredictable at best even for well-matched couples. She could not guarantee Mary and Mr Collins would always be happy, but his presence and company was not galling to her middle sister. He had been quite generous, a pianoforte as a wedding present!

She again looked through the epistle and took notice that Mr Darcy had been reading a letter, likely the one she had written. Perhaps he hadn’t acted unbidden, perhaps he thought he was fulfilling her wishes in this matter. She steeled herself for another confrontation with her father regarding what was to be done. She was prepared to summon Mrs Bennet if necessary should he not comprehend that immediate and decisive action was required of him. The thought came unbidden to her mind that another gentleman was much more suited to such behavior and she realized her admiration for her father was well and truly gone forever.

After a prolonged discussion in his book room. Elizabeth was able to determine that her father had replied some weeks ago to Mr Collins communicating his understanding the Jane was not engaged but he had not mentioned Mary. Nor had he given his middle daughter the letter Mr Collins wrote to her. Due to the time that had passed, they were unsure if that letter should be delivered now.

“We cannot give rise to false hope! Father, you must write to him asking if his wishes are unchanged.”

“Oh, I see no need for that. What other opportunities has he to find a suitable wife?”

Her father was determined to maintain his sense of presiding over his family, a rare occurrence, and dismissed Elizabeth’s concerns. He gave Mary her letter from Mr Collins the next morning as they broke their fast, which caused an uproar. Mrs Bennet was the first to open it, for Mary refused to open correspondence from a man she was not courting, and read it aloud in snippets skipping the unimportant parts.

It contained praise for Mary’s musical accomplishments and the question of what date she would like the wedding to be. Beyond her skill at the piano, not much else was said of her person, not even her pronounced piety and their divisions of scriptures or other religious topics. There was also no indication Mr Collins had asked for Mary’s hand, rather assuming it to be already quite his own.

“Well! That is a relief indeed!” Mrs Bennet exclaimed, but then say the date at the top. “Mr Bennet! What can you mean by keeping this a FULL SIX WEEKS!”