Work Text:
Dorian thanks his lucky stars that there's a Starbucks not five minutes walk from his new job in Honnleath. The entire place is strange enough as it is, and he's possibly a little too grateful to have the familiarity of a Starbucks to help him through this transitional period. He breathes deeply when he enters, taking in the warm aroma of roasted coffee and toasted bread, and approaches the counter.
The barista is unfairly attractive, and Dorian adds another mark to this establishment's grade. Close to work, check. Smells good, check. Cute barista, check, check. He smiles at the blonde man and places his usual order.
The man -- Cullen, according to his nametag -- looks singularly unimpressed with Dorian's order. It's not too strange, surely -- a tall, non-fat latte with caramel drizzle is fairly straightforward compared to some of the drinks Dorian had heard people order in Minrathous. Perhaps out here in the ass end of Ferelden, it's a little odd.
"So that was a tall non-fat latte with caramel drizzle?" Cullen glances up at him. "You know the caramel is full of sugar, right?"
Dorian rolls his eyes. "Yes, I'm aware, thank you." He doesn't offer any further information -- why should he? -- and Cullen shrugs and puts the order through.
He checks his phone while he waits at the other end of the counter, and when his coffee arrives, he picks it up without even looking as he replies to a text message from Felix. It's not until he's out on the street that he happens to see the name written on his cup.
"Oh, that jerk," he mutters. Written in clear, bold print is the name "Doreen" with a smiley face underneath.
Minus one mark for getting his name wrong, but Dorian can't deny that the coffee is really good. He heads back to his office, carefully holding the cup to hide the name written on it.
The Starbucks is busy the next morning when Dorian stops by to pick up a coffee before work. The same barista is at the counter, taking orders and money with the smooth efficiency that speaks of a long time spent working there. When Dorian gets to the counter, Cullen looks up at him and grins. "Don't tell me," he says, "tall non-fat mocha with caramel drizzle?"
"Close," Dorian says, smiling. He'll never be able to understand how baristas can remember individual customers' orders like this. "Latte, not mocha."
"Doreen, wasn't it?"
Dorian glares at him. Cullen doesn't even blink, but the corner of his mouth turns up in a sly smile. "Dorian, not Doreen," he says with a sniff.
"Sure." Cullen is openly grinning at him now, and Dorian sighs and hands over his money.
This time, the name on the cup is Dory. Dorian's never coming back here ever again. Until he takes a sip and Maker, if it doesn't taste even better than yesterday.
Perhaps Dorian can deal with his barista being a jerk. And Dorian is pretty sure he can be a jerk right back at him.
"Tall non-fat latte with caramel," Cullen says immediately the next morning. "See, I remembered this time."
"Pity you can't get my name right," Dorian says with a sigh. "And no, I'm going to have something different today." He taps his lip thoughtfully, trying to remember what he'd planned. "A triple venti half sweet non fat caramel macchiato, please."
The look on Cullen's face is worth it. He looks horrified, then glares. "Triple venti half sweet non fat caramel macchiato? Maker's breath. For Dory."
"Dorian. Dooreean," Dorian grumbles, and hands over his money. He's actually impressed Cullen remembered all that. Dorian had had to write it down and read it over several times before he came into the store.
The name on today's cup is Door Eee An. He supposes he deserved that. He glances at Cullen on his way out, and can't help smiling at little at the shit-eating grin on the man's face.
"Iced half caf ristretto venti four pump sugar free cinnamon dolce soy skinny latte," Dorian reels off.
"No. You have got to be kidding." Cullen looks disgusted. "Um. Please tell me you're kidding."
"Did you need me to repeat it?" Dorian says smugly.
"No! No. I think I got it. Soy? Are you sure?"
"I'm trying dairy free," Dorian says serenely.
"Maker take me," Cullen mutters, and is almost ungracious as he takes Dorian's money.
Today's cup doesn't even have a name on it, and the barista at the end of the counter clears his throat and says, "Uh, coffee for the jerk with the moustache?"
Dorian's quite pleased with himself for not bursting out laughing. Instead, he just grins and raises the cup in Cullen's direction, who scowls at him.
It's quite possibly the worst coffee Dorian's ever had. He only takes a few sips before tipping it down the sink in the kitchen at work, but it was worth it.
The next morning, Cullen has a haunted look when Dorian approaches the counter. "Please," he begs, "just order your blighted fat free caramel latte again."
"I don't know," Dorian says thoughtfully. "Today I think I'll try a tall non-fat latte…"
Cullen looks at him hopefully.
"... with two percent foam."
"No. Nope. Can't do that." Cullen throws his pen down. "You win."
Dorian grins at him. "Excellent. I love winning. Tall non-fat latte with caramel drizzle, please."
Cullen looks incredibly relieved. "Oh, thank the Maker." He even smiles when Dorian hands his money over, and Maker but it's a wonderful sight.
The coffee arrives without Dorian’s name again, but this time it’s addressed to cute guy with the moustache. Dorian’s so busy grinning that he almost doesn’t notice the phone number written underneath.
Perhaps Honnleath isn't going to be such a bad place to live after all.