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Aou opened the door to his condo and entered, Boom dragging in behind him. Both were exhausted from a long day of work. Without hesitation, they entered the bedroom and let themselves fall, face first, onto the bed.
“Do we have to take a shower?”, Boom mumbled, his face smushed into one of the pillows. Aou gave a little exhausted chuckle.
“Yes, of course we need to shower. You’ve been sweating all day, don’t think I’ll let you sleep in my bed like this!”
“But I’m already in your bed, so it won’t make a difference now anyways.”
“Do you want me to kick you off?”, asked Aou, pretending to prepare to shove Boom’s body off the bed with his foot. Boom instinctively held his arms up in surrender. Aou immediately let his foot fall again, subconsciously scooting a little bit closer to the man next to him.
“Give me ten minutes, then I’ll go”, said Boom with a heavy sigh.
“Five minutes”, retorted Aou sternly, but a soft smile stole itself onto his lips. Both knew Aou would give him as much time as he wanted. Boom’s eyes had fallen close, trying to regain some energy, but Aou next to him was fixated on him, his eyes showing the emotional turmoil within him.
As much as Aou didn’t want to admit it, he’d started to struggle to disconnect from his characters emotions - or that’s what he thought was happening, ignoring the very real feelings that were blossoming for his friend - especially after shooting days where he had to be particularly close to Boom. Like today, when they filmed their NC scene for their new show. It didn’t help, that this scene had been especially intense and long – more so than any other scene they had filmed before. Aou had always found it easy to fall into the emotions of his characters when it came to his connection to Booms characters. That’s why they made such a great team, he thought. Both always knew how completely give themselves over to their roles. But as easy as it was in the beginning, to rid himself of those emotions again, over time it has become increasingly difficult. The feelings his characters felt seemed to linger, longer and stronger each time. Right now, looking at Boom, one of his best friends, he should feel nothing but platonic affection for him. He shouldn’t want to stretch out his hand and let it graze across Boom’s arm. He shouldn’t want to let his palm rest on the slight curve of Boom’s waist. He shouldn’t want to pull his friend closer to him until he could sling his arms around him and never let him go. He shouldn’t want to trace every line of Boom’s face. And he definitely shouldn’t want to kiss him, the way that he wanted to, right that second – passionately, deeply, desperately.
Scenes from their shoot that day started to replay in Aou’s head. The way Boom’s lips had felt against his. How Boom’s body had felt, pressed against him. The feel of his hair between his fingers, when he had to refrain himself from pulling it, in the hopes of eliciting even the smallest of reactions from Boom.
Aou started squirming on the bed, trying to stay as still as possible to not alarm Boom, but at the same time trying to get rid of the frantic energy that has been building up more and more inside him. His pulse was racing, his breathing fast and shallow. The only thing he was able to think of was Boom. Every other thought has left his mind. He finally managed to tear away his eyes from staring at his friends face only to look back at him again mere seconds later, because looking away felt even worse than keeping his gaze fixed on him.
A small strand of hair had fallen over Boom’s closed eyes. As if in a trance, Aou’s hand slowly stretches towards his face and tenderly smooths the piece of hair back behind Boom’s ear. Surprised by the sudden touch, Boom opened his eyes, only to be met by the piercing gaze of his friend. Heat started to pool in his cheeks, his ears turning bright red within seconds. He wasn’t sure what Aou was thinking, but his eyes made him feel both embarrassed but also seen.
“Aou?”, he whispered, not trusting his voice enough to speak out loud without trembling. The thoughts in Aous brain went haywire. It took every ounce of self-control to not jump his friend, right then and there. Boom’s big, dark eyes were looking at him expectantly, but he couldn’t answer. His brain was focused on one thing – how to get away with kissing the man in front of him, without destroying their entire friendship. The option of not kissing him had gone out the window. His thoughts were racing, trying to find even the smallest excuse to get Boom’s lips on his.
They didn’t have another kiss scene schedule in the next few days, so he couldn’t pretend that it was practice. There was nothing on Boom’s side of the bed that he would need, that he could lean over and pick up, while “accidentally” letting their mouths touch. Aou scoffed at the absurdity of his own ideas – was he really that desperate to kiss Boom?
He knew the answer was yes.
Suddenly, a memory flashed through his mind. It was the memory of another shooting day a few months back. They were filming a kiss scene for their show We Are. He still remembered how much he enjoyed filming that scene, how exciting it felt. But that wasn’t what ran through his mind now. The memory that came up was from in between takes. Aou was laying down on the bed, the white sheets covering up his naked upper body. He’d been giving a small interview for the behind the scenes crew when Boom suddenly came up to him, leaned over him and said “You need some lipstick”, before kissing him.
Hope started growing in Aou’s chest. This could work. Boom had done it before himself, so he couldn’t be angry with him, right? And if he’d ask why Aou was doing this, he could just tell him, that it was payback for the time he did it to him.
A hand on his arm ripped him away from his new plan. Boom had grown increasingly concerned over the silence from Aou.
“You okay?”, he asked, looking deep into Aou’s eyes, as if he could find the answer written there.
“Wait here for a second”, said Aou, while jumping off the bed and running into the bathroom. Frantically he opened every drawer until he found what he was looking for – lip balm. He knew he was being ridiculous; he knew he shouldn’t be doing this, but if he didn’t then he would combust right then and there. He quickly applied a generous amount of lip balm, before running back to his room.
When he saw Boom, still lying on the bed, although face up now, he faltered for a second. His bravery, that came from nothing but pure desperation at this point, leaving him for a second.
“Aou, what’s going on?”, Jelly asked in a concerned voice. Aou wanted nothing more than to reassure him that everything was fine. Slowly he stepped towards the bed. He sat down next to Boom, right next to him, their bodies touching slightly. Electricity ran through Aou’s entire body, emboldening him in his plan. Carefully he leaned forward, upper body now hovering over Booms. One hand next to Boom’s head to hold himself up, the other cupping the man’s cheek.
“Everything is okay, I promise”, he whispered with a small smile on his face. With his thumb, he started caressing Boom’s cheek and the emotions in his chest swelled when he felt Jelly leaning into his touch slightly. Boom’s eyes stayed trained on Aou, still some uncertainty visible in his gaze. What was going on with his friend? Why was he behaving like this, all of the sudden? Had he figured out how much Boom craved his touch at every given moment?
Boom’s breath hitched when Aou’s thumb suddenly grazed over his lower lip. Aou took a deep breath.
“Phi, your lips are dry. You need some lip balm”, he whispered, barely audible, but he was close enough to Boom for him to understand. And without any further hesitation, Aou kissed him. Their lips connected a little more forcefully than intended, but Aou had barely any control over himself left. For a second Boom was in shock. He should have seen it coming but he didn’t. Aou’s lips against his felt so familiar and yet, this kiss felt also completely different from any other kiss they’ve had.
Aou wasn’t moving, his lips just firmly planted on Boom’s waiting for his reaction. When Boom didn’t move, fear spread through Aou’s body. What had he done? Did he really think that Boom would be okay with this? He backed away, breaking their connection, staring at the man under him like a deer in headlights. Panic flooded through him, and he was about to run out the room, when suddenly a hand wrapped around the back of his neck, pulling him down again. Boom’s brain had finally started to react after the shock of Aou’s sudden kiss and now he wanted nothing more than to keep Aou’s lips on his for as long as he could. He crashed their mouths together and this time neither of them froze. Their lips moved together in their all too familiar rhythm, as if they were made for each other. Boom’s hands started traveling along Aou’s back, leaving a trail of goosebumps on his skin, urging him to climb on top of him for a more comfortable position, by carefully grabbing Aou’s hips and slowly guiding him over his body. An incredulous giggle fell out of Boom’s mouth into their kiss and Aou didn’t waste a second darting his tongue in between his now opened lips. He deepened their kiss, one of his hands finding their way into Boom’s silky hair. Without even thinking about it, he grabbed onto it and pulled – not hard, just enough so Boom could feel it, just so he would lean his head back a little, giving Aou more access to his neck. Aou immediately began to trail kisses along the length of his neck. When he got to the junction between neck and shoulder, he gave him a little nibble, which elicited a small little moan from Boom, who was squirming underneath him. Aou’s brain went haywire. This was the sound he was waiting to hear the entire day – the response he couldn’t get while filming but could freely enjoy in the sanctity of his bedroom. Like a madman, he reconnected their lips again, reigniting their fiery battle. This time he didn’t wait for Boom to open his mouth he ran his tongue across his lips and immediately was granted entry.
They lost all sense of time and when they finally parted, panting lightly, they couldn’t tell if minutes went by or hours. Slowly their brains were coming down from their adrenaline high, leaving them with the sobering reality of what had just happened. Fear was reflected in both their eyes when they looked at each other. How could they ever justify what just happened within the bounds of their friendship? It was Boom, who found his voice first.
“I just needed more lip balm”, he whispered the only thing he could think of to explain his actions. A deep sigh of relief washed over Aou, and a small smile stole itself onto his lips. He used one of his hands to smooth out Jelly’s hair, which he had left in a state of utter disarray. Aou let himself fall sideways onto the bed next to Boom before he answered.
“It’s okay. Glad to have been of service” After a second of just looking at each other, they both broke out in laughter. Both were aware of how ridiculous they were being, not acknowledging what had happened just now, but neither of them was ready to deal with that reality just yet. So, they let themselves believe their excuse of applying lip balm for one another.
“Come on, you had your time. Go take a shower now! I want to go to sleep!”