Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“I can be a good boy for you.”

“What?” Hongjoong blinked, completely dumbfounded.

There was no way that this was actually happening to him, not again.

“I said I can be a good boy for you.”

Hongjoong waved his hand in front of his face, “that’s not what we’re here to talk about.”

His date nodded with a wide grin on his face, “oh, so you already have that much faith in how good I can be for you?”

“What?” Hongjoong frowned and shook his head. “That’s not what I said at all.”

“So, anyway,” the man leaned forward with his elbows on the table, “how do you feel about cock cages?”

“I’ve never used them before,” Hongjoong answered plainly as he tried to school his expression into something a little more neutral than the slack jawed look of exasperation that he really wanted to have. “I thought we agreed that there wasn’t going to be any kink talk tonight.”

Before they had even agreed to meet up Hongjoong had made it clear that he didn’t want any kink talk on the first date. For him, first dates were simply an opportunity for him to get to know his date. If they were compatible, then they could go to the next phase and see how well their kinks lined up.

Right now, Hongjoong didn’t even know if he was attracted to the man across from him yet. How was he supposed to know if he wanted to lock his cock up and throw away the key?

“Oh,” his date shrugged. “I didn’t think you were serious about that.”

“I was very serious about it,” Hongjoong answered. “I like to move onto kinks after I know I like whoever I’m on a date with.”

“I thought this was going well,” the man frowned a little and covered it by taking a sip of his drink.

Hongjoong couldn’t help but sigh, “I thought it was too.”

“Then we’re good,” the man gave Hongjoong a winning smile. “How do you feel about being called Daddy?”

“What?” Hongjoong blinked.

“Don’t let being young hold you back. Daddy is just a mental state you know?” His date shrugged and smiled. “Anyone can be a Daddy if they have the right vibe.”

“Nothing is holding me back, it’s just not something that I’m into.” Hongjoong lifted his hand and pinched the bridge of his nose with two of his fingers. “I’m also not into talking about this stuff in public where anyone can hear us. That’s part of the reason I wanted this to be a normal date. I’m not really into public displays of kink.”

“Oh,” the man nodded like he understood everything. “So, you’re like, ashamed of the lifestyle.”

“What? No.” Hongjoong answered firmly. “I’m just not into strangers, including kids, hearing conversations like the one that you want to have. No one here consented to being involved in other people’s kink”

“Right,” his date nodded a few times. “So, this is just like a vanilla date?”

“Yes,” Hongjoong breathed out. “That’s what we talked about, and you agreed to before we decided to meet up.”

“Okay so let’s end this part of the date go back to my place to talk more,” the guy pushed his plate away from himself before he looked around to find their server.

“Finish your food,” Hongjoong mumbled.

“Oh?” The man turned his head and smirked at Hongjoong.

“Not like that,” Hongjoong groaned and just barely resisted the urge to slam his head on the table.

“You’re giving me mixed messages,” the guy pointed at Hongjoong. “What do you want?”

“To finish dinner,” Hongjoong answered through gritted teeth. “I’m not even sure if this is going to work out anymore.”

“I don’t have to call you Daddy,” Hongjoong's date shrugged. “That’s not like a deal breaker for me.”

“I already said I wasn’t into it,” Hongjoong said as he squeezed his hands into two fists under the table. “Are you even listening to me?”

Hongjoong watched as his date dramatically rolled his eyes.

Without thinking Hongjoong stood up and placed his napkin on the table. The date was over. It was just another failure to add to his long list, but he wasn’t willing to cause a scene. There was no reason to humiliate the man across from him, or bring strangers into the situation

Normally, even on a failed date, he’d stay and finish eating. Hongjoong had suffered through worse, but there was something about the guy across from him that was starting to make Hongjoong want to scream out in frustration.

“I’m leaving,” Hongjoong stated firmly.

“Do you still want to hook up?” The man looked up at him expectantly. “I prepped and wore a plug.”

“Oh my god,” Hongjoong said louder than he wanted to. “No, we’re not going to hook up. I’ll send you money for dinner. I’m leaving.”

“You know,” the man pointed at Hongjoong. “I should have known not to go out on a date with a Dom that doesn’t know what they’re doing. Everyone warned me.”

“Yeah, well, your mistake I guess,” Hongjoong shrugged, he wasn’t going to take the bait.

“Are you sure you’re not actually a submissive?”

Anger prickled under Hongjoong’s skin. Rather than lash out, he closed his eyes and took another deep breath before he spoke, “I am very sure about who I am, and I think that’s part of the issue. I hope you find the Daddy Dom of your dreams.”

Without another word Hongjoong turned away from his date and headed towards the exit. He was thankful that the man hadn’t chosen to follow him. There was only so much drama he could take in one evening.

This was just another failed date. There had already been so many that he should have known better than to be disappointed. In the last month he had only met one person who he had been compatible with, and they never made it past the third date. Their interests were too different, and they couldn’t compromise.

Realizing that he was into kink had been a slow process for Hongjoong, and even after a few years of navigating the community online he still felt like an outsider. A big part of him felt like he was too prude or old-fashioned to really participate in the community. Hongjoong wanted to fall in love, and he wanted his partner to also be into kink as a lifestyle. For him it wasn’t just a fun way to have sex, he wanted a dynamic that would leak into the more mundane and vanilla parts of his life with whoever his future partner was.

Honestly, at the beginning, it didn’t feel like that kind of partner was going to be hard to find. There were so many people online with healthy and happy relationships that heavily incorporated power play into their daily lives. Then Hongjoong started dating within the community, and he quickly found out how hard finding a partner was going to be. Almost everyone was just looking for a hook up. Hongjoong didn’t want to Dom a stranger, he wanted to learn and grow with someone. He wanted to pull someone apart, figure out everything they wanted, and spend the rest of their time together giving his partner all of those things.

It was too romantic for kink, but Hongjoong wanted to be a slave for his submissive.

Except he had seen so many people living his dream, and that kept a small flame of hope alive in him. There had been so many examples of couples with the level of open communication and devotion to each other that he longed for. The kind of relationship he wanted existed; it was just completely out of reach.

There was also the issue of his inexperience.

Hongjoong had been tempted to lie about it a few times, but he knew he had to be honest. He had never engaged in a formal scene or anything beyond typical kinky vanilla sex. Hongjoong was a novice, and most people weren’t willing to take on that kind of risk. At best novice Dominants were over eager, and at their worst they were dangerous. Hongjoong wasn’t dangerous even if he was eager, but he knew he had lost potential relationships over his lack of practical knowledge.

He also didn’t fit into the fantasy of who a Dominate was. So many people wanted someone who was older, physically imposing, and rich enough to have a sugar baby or two. Hongjoong was still young, and he had just finished his master’s degree. He wasn’t struggling, but he still lived with two roommates to make paying bills a little easier. There was no way that he could consistently spoil another person with expensive gifts or cash. Hongjoong couldn’t cater to every single whim that someone had no matter how much he wanted to.

Hongjoong was stuck in a limbo of inexperience and failed dates. He wasn’t even sure where he’d have a scene once he found someone to date. It wasn’t like he could kick his roommates out of their own apartment while he did unspeakable things in their living room. Constantly buying hotel rooms for the night was also out of the question.

Maybe it was time to finally stop trying.

When Hongjoong finally got home he closed the door behind himself gently but kicked his shoes off hard enough that each one hit the wall with a large thunk. He dropped his bag on the small table they kept by the door just as dramatically as he took his shoes off and looked up towards his living room.

“That good?” Mingi asked from his seat on the floor in front of Yunho who was sitting on the couch.

“Not the worst, but not the best either,” Hongjoong plopped down onto the couch. “He wanted to call me daddy and kept pushing kinky talk even though I asked him not to.”

“And you hate a disrespectful boy,” Yunho attempted to say with a straight face but failed miserably.

“I do,” Hongjoong whined.

“Was this one from that stupid app or the shitty forum?” Mingi questioned.

“The app,” Hongjoong mumbled. “I’ve had more luck there.”

“Going out on three dates with one guy before you ended things isn’t luck,” Mingi pointed out.

“Bad luck is still a type of luck,” Yunho chimed in.

“Stop,” Hongjoong whined. “I already decided to give up. I’m just going to live everyday with you two throwing your love in my face and suffer.”

“We literally never do that,” Yunho frowned.

“Ever,” Mingi shook his head.

“You do that thing where you finish each other’s thoughts all the time,” Hongjoong straighten up a little. “And you look at each other.”

Yunho let out a loud laugh, “you want me to not look at Mingi.”

“Yes,” Hongjoong nodded firmly. “That’s exactly what I want. You look at each other like you’re in love.”

“We are in love,” Yunho said between giggles.

Mingi made a face, “we’re not going to stop looking at each other.”

“Gross,” Hongjoong made a gagging noise. “If you loved me you’d break up.”

Both Mingi and Yunho erupted in laughter.

“You’re so bitchy after you have a bad date,” Mingi said once he caught his breath.

“Come here,” Yunho pulled Hongjoong over into his side until they were smushed together.

“I hate this,” Hongjoong mumbled.

“You love it,” Yunho tightened his grip on Hongjoong. “And we love you and someday you’ll find your dream person and you’ll ride off into the sunset together.”

“And you’ll get to pick out their clothes in the morning and make them cry or whatever you’re into,” Mingi added in a soft tone.

“You guys know too much about me,” Hongjoong groaned.

“Yeah, well, you overshare when your drunk,” Yunho laughed.

“And I’ve seen your browsing history,” Mingi finally pulled himself up from the floor to sit on the couch. “It’s kind of an academic nightmare, but in a kinky way?”

“What?” Hongjoong wiggled out of Yunho’s grip, but left their bodies connected. “Why did you look at my browsing history? It’s private.”

“Your searches pop up when you type stuff into the browser. I guess I shouldn’t have started a search with the words how to,” Mingi shrugged.

“Was the first autofill how to get a boyfriend?” Yunho teased as he wrapped his arm back around Hongjoong.

“You two are the worst friends ever,” Hongjoong twisted his torso away from Yunho so that his back was pressed to his friend’s shoulder and crossed his arms.

“We already knew Yeosang was your favorite,” Mingi shrugged. “We’re just here to split the bills.”

Hongjoong nodded, “as long as you know that’s your only function in my life.”

“Sure Joong,” Yunho moved his arm to pat Hongjoong’s head. “We’re also here to cheer you up after bad dates.”

“I still think you just need to start hooking up with people,” Mingi pointed out. “It might help with the frustration level.”

“It’s not that easy,” Hongjoong made a face. “I don’t want to just have vanilla sex, it’s not that fulfilling. It’s just like masturbating. It’s good, but it doesn’t take the edge off.”

“Okay then have some casual consensual kinky sex,” Mingi shrugged.

“To do that in a safe way you need to talk about it, and plan it out,” Hongjoong explained. “I can’t just go find a stranger and engage in a power dynamic with them.”

“You might be taking everything too seriously,” Yunho pointed out. “You can’t tell me none of your dates wanted to hook up. You can do some quick negotiations and get your dick wet.”

Hongjoong groaned.

Yunho wasn’t completely wrong. Hongjoong could have gone back to his date’s home. They could have set up some boundaries and safe words. He could have easily had the other man on his knees, that much was clear. It wasn’t what he wanted though.

“Yeah, but I’m not like that,” Hongjoong frowned, but mostly at himself. “I like long term stuff. Even if I was going to have a platonic play partner, I’d want them to be long term.”

“Such a romantic,” Mingi cooed.

“What’s a play partner?” Yunho questioned. “Is it a sports thing?”

“It’s for sex,” Mingi nearly yelled.

“For scenes,” Hongjoong corrected. “You are both aware that everything in a power dynamic isn’t sexual right?”

“Don’t act like you don’t want to cum on a pretty boy,” Mingi shook his head.

Hongjoong threw his hands up almost hitting Yunho, “everyone in this room wants to cum on a pretty boys face.”

“Thankfully mine is right here,” Yunho reached past Hongjoong to squeeze Mingi’s cheeks.

“Please don’t make me think about that,” Hongjoong fake gagged.

"You’re kind of a prude for someone so into kink,” Mingi laughed.

“I just don’t want to think about my childhood friends cumming on each other,” Hongjoong frowned. “I know your mothers.”

“Okay okay,” Yunho held his hands up in defeat. “We won’t talk about that again.”

“At least for a few days,” Mingi nodded.

Hongjoong let out a little laugh, “just thank you for being quiet and never letting me walk in on anything.”

“That you know of,” Yunho added quickly and Mingi reached out to hit his shoulder.

“I don’t want to know, don’t tell me, don’t involve me,” Hongjoong wiggled out of Yunho’s grasp again and stood up. “I think I’m just going to go to bed.”

“You sure? We can play something,” Yunho pointed to the TV.

“I’m bad at video games,” Hongjoong shrugged.

“We’ll let you win,” Yunho offered.

“I’m good,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Thanks for cheering me up though.”

“That’s what we’re here for,” Mingi gave him a bright smile and two thumbs up.

Hongjoong waved them off and stopped by the bathroom before he crossed the hallway to his bedroom. He let the door click shut behind him before he pulled his clothes off. Each article fell to the floor before he kicked them all in the general direction of his overflowing laundry basket. It was something he could deal with in the morning. The only thing that was currently on his mind was getting under his blankets and hopefully falling asleep quickly.

Before he plugged his phone in to charge Hongjoong looked at the notifications and grimaced at the cash request from his date. Apparently, he was paying for the whole dinner. Hongjoong sent the money and then deleted the dating app off his phone. It obviously wasn’t working so why would he keep trying?

There was also a huge chance that his date was gossiping about him with other people in the local community. Not a lot of people seemed to be into the lifestyle and so many of them already knew each other. Sometimes Hongjoong worried that he was getting a bad reputation before he got the chance to even try anything.

With a grumble he burrowed under his blankets and let out a sigh before he forced himself to sleep.

**

The morning had been busy.

Hongjoong woke up late and got to the school with seconds to spare. His co-teacher gave him a concerned look, and he just shrugged it off as they got the classroom ready for the day.

“Are you late because you finally had a good date?” Yeosang asked.

“I’m on time not late,” Hongjoong shot back.

“That wasn’t an answer,” Yeosang said as he walked around and set a piece of blank paper on the table in front of each little chair.

“It was terrible,” Hongjoong breathed out. “I deleted the app. I’m done trying.”

“Get off that terrible forum too,” Yeosang shrugged. “You need to meet people in real life not through the internet.”

“That’s not that easy,” Hongjoong frowned as he started to organize crayons into small baskets for each child. “And you know it.”

Yeosang wasn’t deep into the kink community, but he was close enough that Hongjoong trusted his judgment. They had gone through university together and Hongjoong had seen him in enough compromising positions to know just where Yeosang’s boundaries were.

“You need to go to a munch,” Yeosang pointed out. It wasn’t the first time he had suggested it either.

“I’m not going alone,” Hongjoong shook his head.

“Fine,” Yeosang finished his task and went over to help Hongjoong with the crayons. “I’ll go with you.”

“Aren’t you still doing whatever with that married couple?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Yeah, but it’s not serious,” Yeosang shrugged. “They’re just having some fun and so am I. I’m not even sure if it’s going to go on that much longer.”

“Did something happen?” Hongjoong looked at Yeosang seriously.

“No,” Yeosang smiled. “They just had a list of stuff they wanted to try, and we’re almost done with that list. They’re super in love and apparently only had a third once before. It was when they were a lot younger, so it was just sex. Nothing too formal or thought out.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong nodded. “How did you even find them?”

“I go out in the world,” Yeosang laughed. “I voice my needs to partners and we figure it out or we don’t.”

Hongjoong let out a groan.

“Yes, Hongjoong, not hiding behind a screen will fix your dating issues,” Yeosang teased.

“I’ve been dating,” Hongjoong pointed out.

“Losers that you aren’t vetting before you take them out,” Yeosang rolled his eyes. “All you do is complain about the app you use and that cesspool of a forum. You need to give both those platforms up because you’re just going in circles expecting different results.”

“Fine,” Hongjoong’s voice got louder. “You’re right, but I’m not that bad. There has to be someone good somewhere.”

“You are that bad,” Yeosang nodded. “Mingi and Yunho agree.”

“You guys talk about me?” Hongjoong made a serious face.

“We worry about you and these dates,” Yeosang corrected. “We want you happy and drained.”

“That’s disgusting I hope none of you actually said happy and drained,” Hongjoong laughed.

“None of us said that,” Yeosang confirmed with his own laugh. “We do want you happy though.”

“Okay let’s go to a munch,” Hongjoong shrugged.

“Cool,” Yeosang pulled his phone out of his pocket to check the time. “Ten minutes till the kids show up.”

Hongjoong nodded even though Yeosang wasn’t looking at him, “how are you even going to find a munch?”

“Found one already,” Yeosang held up his phone to show Hongjoong. “We can go after the kids get picked up.”

“What?” Hongjoong looked at him surprised. “How did you do that?”

“I put in a small amount of effort and searched for local munches,” Yeosang shook his head with a smile. “I guess you’re dressed nice enough. You do like when the moms flirt with you.”

“Oh stop,” Hongjoong rolled his eyes.

Yeosang moved to start placing the crayon baskets on the tables, “just don’t let the kids spill anything on you.”

“Where is the event?” Hongjoong censored himself as he opened the classroom door.

“A restaurant. It looks like they rented out the function hall in the back of it,” Yeosang shrugged. “It said queer friendly.”

“Oh, that’s good,” Hongjoong nodded.

“You don’t have to go,” Yeosang walked over to him and put his hand on Hongjoong’s arm. “It’s just an idea to get you out of your rut.”

“It’s fine I want to try,” Hongjoong nodded.

“I have one condition before we go,” Yeosang perked up.

“What?” Hongjoong groaned.

“I want to watch you delete your account on that forum,” Yeosang beamed. “And I want you to stay off of it.”

Hongjoong found himself rolling his eyes again, “it’s not that bad.”

“It fosters abusive behaviors, and you know there’s minors lurking,” Yeosang pointed out.

“Okay yeah fine,” Hongjoong held up his hands. “You can watch me delete it after class.”

“Good,” Yeosang nodded firmly. “Now get ready, your fan club of moms will be here soon. Too bad you can’t date one of them.”

Hongjoong laughed, “why are you like this?”

Yeosang just grinned and shrugged. Hongjoong didn’t have a chance to reply because the first child of the day was already heading right towards him holding his mother’s hand.

**

Hongjoong slumped back against the doorframe as the last child left the room. He looked over to Yeosang and let out a deep breath. There had been no opportunity for a break that day. The kids spent their time working each other up and there was nothing Hongjoong or Yeosang could do to calm them down. They had no choice but to lean in and go with the chaos as much as possible.

In a way it was good. It saved Hongjoong from coming up with a million imaginary scenarios that could happen at the munch. There was always a chance that he’d meet someone, and an even bigger chance that he’d leave frustrated and disheartened.

“You still want to check out the much?” Yeosang asked.

Hongjoong pushed off the wall, “yeah we can still go.”

“Delete your profile and we can go,” Yeosang grinned.

Hongjoong laughed but pulled his phone out of his pocket anyway. He navigated to the forum and gave it a quick once over. He had five new private messages. Curiosity got the better of him and he clicked the envelope icon.

“That’s not deleting it,” Yeosang said as he made a face. “Here I’ll do it.”

Yeosang snatched Hongjoong’s phone out of his hand, and Hongjoong didn’t even try to put up a fight. Not looking at the messages wouldn’t be the worst thing. They were likely just people telling him that his faceless photos were hot. Sometimes he’d look at their photos and find them attractive too, nothing ever left their messages though. He’d roleplay a scene with whoever messaged him and pathetically jerk his cock to the fantasy. It was just frustrating, and so far from an ideal situation. Plus, Yeosang was right when he said the forum fostered abusive dynamics, and that minors lurked.

The forum was a red flag, and Yeosang was just doing him a favor by deleting it.

“There,” Yeosang handed him back his phone.

“What if the one was in my DMs?” Hongjoong whined as he started to put the kid’s chairs on top of the big circular tables they sat at.

“Your future partner isn’t going to be someone who’s DMing you there,” Yeosang rolled his eyes as he started to pick up the chairs on the other side of the room. “You need someone stable, who can support you emotionally and maybe monetarily until you decide if you’re going to do more school or use your new degree.”

“That’s…” Hongjoong started.

“A good point,” Yeosang finished for him with a grin.

“I can’t believe people think you’re just quiet and nice,” Hongjoong grumbled. “Yunho is still amazed when you get chatty.”

“Because you don’t invite me over enough so he’s still a stranger,” Yeosang shrugged as he finished putting the last chair on top of it’s table. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong breathed out.

Once they were on the street Hongjoong ended up a few steps behind Yeosang. The other man seemed to know where he was headed and Hongjoong was fine with being a few steps behind. He couldn’t focus on anything right now anyway. Thoughts of how good the munch could go swirled around in the back of his head. Maybe he’d meet someone who was like minded. Hongjoong knew that everyone wasn’t going to have the same views and philosophy on kink that he did, but eventually someone had to be a match. There had to be someone out there that he aligned with enough to make a relationship work.

“We’re here,” Yeosang stopped and reached out to grab Hongjoong’s arm. “Don’t be an asshole to anyone.”

“I’m not going to be an asshole,” Hongjoong made a face.

“If you’re not into it just tell me and we can go,” Yeosang titled his head into Hongjoong’s face until they were making eye contact. “Okay?”

“Of course yeah,” Hongjoong nodded and took a step back.

Yeosang turned away from him and headed in through the open doorway. Hongjoong followed him again like a little puppy. He didn’t know exactly what to expect when they entered the function hall at the back of the restaurant, but everything seemed normal. It looked like it could have been a birthday party. No one was in full fetish gear though there were a few people in decorative harnesses dotted around the room. If anything, the harnesses looked like fashion pieces and not an outward sign of anything kink related in a very public space. Hongjoong breathed out and let his body relax.

Then he heard it.

There was a high-pitched gleeful screech before a young child ran past them closely followed by two more. Hongjoong’s jaw dropped slightly as he looked between Yeosang and at the crowd again. This time he spotted a few teenagers. Most of them were sitting bored on their phones but a few were talking to the adults in the room.

What was happening?

“Is this the right place?” Hongjoong frowned.

“Yeah,” Yeosang held up his phone.

Hongjoong scanned the event post, and his stomach dropped, “it says family friendly.”

“It doesn’t,” Yeosang took his phone back. “That doesn’t even make any sense.”

“Right after queer friendly,” Hongjoong whisper yelled.

No one had noticed them yet and he wanted to keep it that way.

“Shit,” Yeosang shook his head. “I mean maybe it’s not that bad. You do like to just vibe before you get into the power dynamic stuff.”

“I don’t want to say power dynamic around kids,” Hongjoong frowned. “The little ones don’t know what that means, but the older ones do.”

“Maybe it’s just a community thing. Let’s give it a chance,” Yeosang grabbed Hongjoong’s arm and squeezed. “We might be the weirdos.”

“Okay, okay, yeah,” Hongjoong nodded and took a few steps into the room. He couldn’t help but continuously scan the room looking for something wrong.

Nothing was glaring wrong until Hongjoong watched, horrified, as a man dropped to his knees in front of another man that Hongjoong could only assume was his Dom. The man who was still standing put his hand in the kneeling man’s hair and gave it a light tug.

“We need to go,” Hongjoong nodded over to them. “That’s not cool with the kids around.”

Yeosang froze and looked over to the display that Hongjoong had spotted, “wait.”

Hongjoong clenched his fist and watched as a women walked over to them. Words were exchanged and the man that was kneeling stood up. Hongjoong could hear them apologize, but he was still disgusted by the whole display. Not all kink was sexual but open displays of power dynamics didn’t belong near small children, and they didn’t belong around teenagers who could understand what was going on. He didn’t want to be in a room with people that thought it was okay even if it was only two of them.

“I want to go,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’ll buy you dinner to make up for whatever mess is happening right now.”

“Sure,” Yeosang nodded and frowned. “Sorry. I should have looked at the posting better.”

“It’s fine,” Hongjoong waved his hand and headed out of the hall as quickly as possible. He didn’t want to be stopped; he didn’t want to introduce himself to anyone.

“At least they got called out,” Yeosang said when they were back on the sidewalk.

Hongjoong shrugged. “I still didn’t like it. There are so many things you can do to have a dynamic around other people and kids without anyone noticing. Or you can just not. I don’t understand why they couldn’t wait.”

“I’m sure they didn’t mean anything harmful,” Yeosang supplied.

“I doubt they even thought about what they were doing but that’s the issue,” Hongjoong made a face as he started down the street in the direction of his apartment. “Teenagers are old enough to know. Can you imagine how awkward that is? Even if they think it’s funny now it’s not going to be later.”

“I get it,” Yeosang mumbled. “I’m sorry I missed the family friendly part.”

“It’s not your fault,” Hongjoong paused and turned to smile. “I’m not mad just a little weirded out.”

“I really thought it was going to be okay,” Yeosang scurried to keep up with Hongjoong’s quick pace.

“Not mad,” Hongjoong repeated before he turned into a dark little restaurant that focused on mandu.

Hongjoong paused at the ordering kiosk in the entry way and looked at the screen. He pressed a few buttons and paid before he realized that he ordered way too much food.

“Did you order everything on the menu?” Yeosang tried to joke.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Don’t worry it’s my treat.”

They sat down at a table at the back of the small shop away from the kitchen and the tiny bar.

“Soju?” Yeosang offered.

“Beer,” Hongjoong replied. “Please.”

Yeosang nodded before he stood and Hongjoong found himself tapping his fingers on the table nervously. It was time to give up completely, and he was going to have to figure out a way to be okay with that. A relationship with a power dynamic wasn’t in his future and that was going to have to be okay. He could pivot, he could find someone who wasn’t completely vanilla and make that work.

“Can I apologize again?” Yeosang said when he came back with two beers.

“Don’t,” Hongjoong held his hand up. “I’m just not into anything in public. Maybe I take consent too far.”

“I get that,” Yeosang nodded. “I don’t think you take things too far though. Sometimes people are too loose. What those guys did could have still left an impression on one of the kids even if it was just a few moments.”

“Exactly,” Hongjoong nodded. “I just need to know that everyone is of age and good with what’s happening. I don’t need everything to be this big production or show either. I just want to be with my partner and do the things that work for us.”

Yeosang nodded.

“Like your couple. You said they have kids right?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Yeah,” Yeosang said after a sip of his drink.

“You’ve never seen them, and they don’t know you exist right?” Hongjoong questioned.

“I wouldn’t have even known that they have twins if I hadn’t walked in on them video chatting with them,” Yeosang laughed lightly.

“That’s what I want,” Hongjoong shifted in his seat. “I just want to get up to whatever I want to, with someone that consents, and not involve anyone who doesn’t need to be involved.”

“A lot of people are kinky between them and their partner with no big community,” Yeosang offered.

“Yeah but,” Hongjoong started and abruptly stopped as an older woman brought them over everything that Hongjoong had ordered.

They both thanked her with a small bow of their heads.

“I know I don’t need to rely on the kink community for a date,” Hongjoong sighed. “It just feels so hard to find someone the normal way. I’m just supposed to hope that I find someone amazing who just happens to be into kink? I’m into harder stuff, I can live without it, I have been, but I don’t want to.”

“You deserve the things you want,” Yeosang paused to shove a dumpling into his mouth. He chewed a little before he spoke again. “But you need to be realistic too.”

“I know,” Hongjoong made a face. “I just don’t know where to start anymore, and I feel so stupid centering kink sometimes.”

“Then don’t center it,” Yeosang shrugged. “Or maybe try a club or house event where you can walk in and know what you’re going to see and what people are there for.”

Hongjoong sighed and poked at a dumpling, “I think I’m done for now.”

“Don’t be done,” Yeosang looked at him seriously.

“It’s okay,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Maybe I was trying too hard. I don’t know. Maybe a break will be helpful. I can figure out if I want to go back to school again or use my degree.”

“I can see if my husbands know anyone,” Yeosang offered. “They don’t do anything too kink related with me, but I know they’re into it and that they have a set dynamic.”

“No,” Hongjoong quickly answered. “Don’t do that.”

“I could just see if they know any events or clubs or whatever that meet your standards,” Yeosang looked up from the food to Hongjoong. “That munch was my fault, let me make it up to you.”

“I know that wasn’t normal,” Hongjoong cut the dumpling he had been poking in half with his chopsticks. “What if it was just the universe telling me to chill for now?”

“That’s dramatic,” Yeosang laughed. “Don’t be like that. Let me help.”

“Please don’t help,” Hongjoong held up his hands. “I don’t even want to talk about this anymore.”

“Okay fine,” Yeosang nodded. “I’ll drop it for now.”

Hongjoong nodded once and they changed the topic to work gossip.

He was truly thankful to have friends that he could be open and honest with when it came to what he wanted in a relationship. Not everyone would care or even think it was normal for him to be so honest. Yeosang just always got it, and Yunho and Mingi had been in his life too long to not know too much about him. Sure, his love life was embarrassing, but Hongjoong had three of the most amazing friends that anyone could ask for.

Hongjoong held onto that thought as he waved Yeosang off after they finished eating, and headed home where he was welcomed with the sight of Yunho and Mingi cuddled up on the couch.

“No, it didn’t go well, and no I don’t want to talk about it,” Hongjoong said before they could ask anything.

“We just started a movie we can go back to the beginning if you want to watch,” Yunho offered.

“We’re only like five minutes in,” Mingi smiled. “Come watch.”

“Sure,” Hongjoong nodded as he kicked off his shoes.

He didn’t normally give into hanging out with them so easily, but Hongjoong didn’t have any resistance left in him. He just wanted to end the night with people who he knew cared about him.

**

By the time the weekend came around Hongjoong had accepted, mostly, that he’d be single and sexually unfulfilled forever. Porn existed, and he could invest in some higher end sex toys. Sure, he’d be frustrated but it would take the edge off. Right now, he was suffering with nothing but his hand. Maybe he did need to go out and just find someone for a hookup. It wasn’t that he couldn’t enjoy vanilla sex, he could, he just avoided it along with anonymous hook ups because he needed more depth to feel fulfilled.

Maybe he was too romantic.

Hongjoong’s choice to stop trying was really the easiest way to get rid of so much frustration in his life. Everything was going to be so much easier now that he wasn’t going to be constantly upset over bad dates. He was free, and he could focus his time and energy on fostering his relationship with his friends. Someday, he’d be the best single uncle, always ready to babysit because he had nothing better to do.

That’s how he found himself on a Saturday night smiling lazily at Mingi and Yunho while they waited for Yeosang to show up with the food. There were already a few empty soju bottles on the coffee table and Hongjoong knew he needed something in his stomach to help offset the alcohol before he got too drunk. He didn’t feel like being a sloppy drunk, not when he had so many thoughts spinning around in his head.

A loud knock startled him, but Mingi bounced up off the couch before Hongjoong could even register that he needed to do something. He looked up with lazy eyes and his smile dropped when he saw the grin on Yeosang’s face. His other friends didn’t know what that meant, but Hongjoong did.

“What did you do?” Hongjoong asked as Yeosang dropped two boxes of chicken on the coffee table.

“Solidify my place as your best friend,” Yeosang’s grin grew.

“I’m his best friend,” Mingi chimed in.

“I think I am,” Yunho frowned and turned to Hongjoong. “Right?”

“The three of you are my only friends,” Hongjoong shook his head. “It’s not a competition.”

Yeosang plopped down on the couch next to Hongjoong jostling his body a little big, “I’m still about to win.”

“So,” Mingi took a bite of a piece of chicken. “What did you do?”

“I,” Yeosang shifted his weight. "Complained about Hongjoong’s miserable sex life to my married couple.”

Hongjoong choked on nothing as he stood up.

“Your what?” Yunho frowned.

“I hook up with this really sweet couple,” Yeosang smiled softly. “They’re just two dads that want to have some fun, but they’re pretty into kink and I figured they might know someone.”

“Yeah of course,” Yunho shrugged. “Why wouldn’t you be hooking up with some dads.”

Hongjoong stood blinking.

“Why is Hongjoong’s lack of sex your pillow talk?” Mingi asked with a laugh.

Hongjoong wanted to kick Yeosang out of the house completely. He wanted to take the gifted chicken to his bedroom and eat it alone while he contemplated just how truly pathetic, he was that Yeosang was talking about him to his hook ups.

“It was way after,” Yeosang shrugged. “They had a friend coming over and asked me if I wanted to stay and hang out. I think they want to be friends after which is cool of them.”

“I told you not to talk about me,” Hongjoong suddenly blurted out.

“Joong,” Yeosang leaned forward and grabbed Hongjoong’s hand. “I hated seeing how sad and defeated you were the other night. You deserve to be happy, and I knew I could help.”

Hongjoong pulled his hand back, “I don’t want you gossiping about me to strangers.”

Yeosang rolled his eyes dramatically, “this is a thank you Yeosang situation not a yell at me one.”

“You found him a guy?” Mingi asked around a mouth full of chicken.

“I did,” Yeosang said with a large smile.

Hongjoong’s mouth went into a tight line before he reached down to the table to find an unopened bottle of soju. Grape, not his favorite but it would do. He twisted off the cap and chugged about half of it.

“Has he always been this dramatic?” Yeosang shot Hongjoong a judgement look.

“Yeah,” Yunho shrugged. “He doesn’t know how to verbally express his feelings. He’s always been like that.”

“I can talk about my feelings,” Hongjoong cradled the soju bottle to his chest.

“After months of driving yourself insane,” Yunho shot back. “Then you come out with the most obvious self-observations like we’re supposed to be surprised.”

“Therapy helped me with that,” Mingi shrugged.

Hongjoong groaned, “why does every hang out have to be an intervention.”

“Dude, we love you and want you happy,” Mingi shook his head.

“Which is why I found you a guy that will suck your dick,” Yeosang said simply. “He might even beg to do it.”

“Gross,” Yunho gagged as he grabbed a piece of chicken.

Hongjoong finally sat back down, still clutching the bottle of soju, “you really didn’t need to find me a guy.”

“It just worked out really well,” Yeosang gave Hongjoong’s knee a pat. “Their friend came over and he was talking about wanting to find a play partner. I didn’t insult you or mention you right away. I just saw an opportunity.”

Hongjoong exhaled and some of his anxiety went with it.

“Anyway, he’s older,” Yeosang started. “He’s very into kink even though he’s a little rusty. Apparently, his ex-husband, wasn’t into it.”

“Ex husband?” Mingi set down his half eaten piece of chicken.

“Yeah, he’s newly divorced,” Yeosang shrugged and turned to focus on Hongjoong. “I don’t think that matters. He wants a long term play partner not a relationship. I thought it might be a good way for Hongjoong to get some experience and maybe meet some people. He said he didn’t mind that you were a novice. He might have seemed a little into it.”

“You already talked to this old guy about me?” Hongjoong gasped.

“Well, yeah. One of the husbands was super giddy about it and kind of pushy, but he’s cute like that,” Yeosang smiled and shrugged. “Anyway, do you want to see what he looks like?”

“Yes,” Mingi yelled.

Hongjoong reached out and shoved Mingi to shut him up, “my best option is some old guy?”

“He’s only ten years older than you,” Yeosang shrugged.

“So, he’s almost forty,” Hongjoong deadpanned.

“You’re almost thirty,” Yeosang pointed out.

Hongjoong flinched.

“I think you want to see him,” Yeosang pushed.

“I want to see him,” Mingi cut in again with a laugh.

“Yeah, I’m curious too,” Yunho shrugged.

“Here,” Yeosang set his phone on the coffee table. “Joong look if you want to.”

“What the fuck,” Yunho grabbed the phone. “These guys are insane. Are the other two your couple?”

“Yeah,” Yeosang nodded with a smile.

“Damn,” Mingi squished up to Yunho to look at the phone.

Hongjoong shifted forward but he didn’t know if he wanted to give in. It didn’t matter if the guy was attractive. He was older and divorced. It sounded like it was going to be messy. Hongjoong didn’t want messy, and he didn’t even know if he wanted a play partner, he wanted someone he could keep.

“Look,” Yunho held the phone out until it was in Hongjoong’s face.

Hongjoong blinked before he let his eyes focus on the screen. The bottle of soju he was holding rolled out of his hand and onto the floor with a loud clink of the glass.

He looked over at Yeosang with a panicked look on his face before he grabbed the phone out of Yunho’s hands. There were three men on the screen. They all were posing with simple smiles, two men with black hair were on either side of a taller man with shaggy long blonde hair in the middle.

There was no way.

“Which one is he?” Hongjoong asked as his grip on the phone tightened.

Yeosang only laughed.

“I’m so serious right now” Hongjoong looked between Yeosang and the phone. “Which one is he?”

“The two with the black hair are my couple,” Yeosang answered evenly.

Hongjoong’s stomach dropped.

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “You just pulled up a model’s instagram account.”

“I didn’t,” Yeosang laughed.

“Please don’t fuck with me like this,” Hongjoong clenched his jaw and Yeosang just continued to laugh at him.

“Is he a model?” Mingi asked seriously as he left Yunho’s side to try and peer over Hongjoong’s shoulder to get another look.

Hongjoong shoved him away with one arm.

“He’s not a model,” Yeosang shook his head.

“There’s no way,” Hongjoong put the phone face down on the couch. “Why are you lying to me? It’s not funny. This is my life. I’ve been thinking about how much I love you guys. About how I’m going to be the best uncle to your future children and now you’re doing this to me? Did you guys all get together and decide to prank me? It’s not funny, I’m not laughing.”

“Hongjoong,” Yeosang said quietly. “Breathe. It’s not a joke.”

Hongjoong held his breath for a few more moments out of spite as Yeosang picked up his phone. He tapped it a few times and handed the device back to Hongjoong.

“His name is Seonghwa, he is very real,” Yeosang said in the same quiet tone he used on their students when they were having a meltdown. “That’s his instagram you can scroll through it. We’re friends now so don’t worry if you like something by mistake.”

Hongjoong looked down to see a picture of the blonde smiling so brightly that it looked like he was in pain. No, he would not be scrolling through anything. He set the phone back down on the couch.

“He’s your type,” Yunho grinned. “Did you see his mouth?”

“Of course I saw his mouth,” Hongjoong grumbled. “Listen, a man like that won’t want anything to do with me.”

“Actually,” Yeosang smiled brightly. “He said you were attractive.”

“Of course he did,” Mingi nodded. “Hongjoong is attractive.”

“Wait,” Hongjoong held up his hand as he tried to take in all the new information. Not only had Yeosang brought up the sad state of his dating life with his hook ups and their friend, but he had also offered Hongjoong up to the most beautiful man that he had ever seen. Now he had to believe that the model man, Seonghwa, thought he was attractive?

“We looked through your insta,” Yeosang was still using the frustratingly calm voice. “He said you were handsome and asked about your dick size, but I couldn’t answer that. I just said I didn’t think you’d be disappointing.”

Mingi laughed, “he’s not.”

“Hey,” Hongjoong flushed. “I thought we weren’t going to talk about that.”

“I just walked in on you masturbating it’s not a big deal,” Mingi shrugged.

Hongjoong let out a groan and buried his face in his hands, “I hate everything that’s happening right now.”

“I think you should like the part where I hyped you up so much that this hot older guy wants to give you a chance,” Yeosang’s tone finally turned firm.

“Yeosang, I don’t know what I’m doing. He knows what he’s doing and he’s hot,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’m going to embarrass myself. I can’t.”

“You can,” Yeosang laughed. “You already passed all the superficial tests without even knowing it. He seemed kind of excited about the novice thing. Maybe he has a corruption kink. If I was that pretty, I’d want to wreck men too.”

“You’re pretty enough to wreck men,” Yunho commented seriously while Mingi nodded.

Yeosang smiled at them, “thank you.”

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “That’s not your next couple.”

The three men just laughed. Hongjoong shook his head, he’d deal with that if it happened. Right now, he had to focus on the real issue.

“There is no way that this is going to actually work though,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Look at him.”

“He seemed really nice, he has a deep voice,” Yeosang pointed out. “And a nice laugh.”

“This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me,” Hongjoong groaned.

Yeosang reached out and shoved him, “you are the most dramatic person I’ve ever met in my entire life. Do you want his number or not?”

“I want to marry him tomorrow,” Hongjoong said as he looked at the picture on the phone. “Does he need a house husband? Are we sure he’s submissive? He doesn’t look like it.”

“Don’t judge people based off of how they look,” Yeosang reached out to flick Hongjoong’s forehead.

Hongjoong waved his hands in front of his face, “sorry you’re right. I’m just in shock I think.”

“Do you want this guy’s number or not?” Yeosang crossed his arms.

“Can I think about it?” Hongjoong asked honestly. There was too much alcohol in his system, and he wasn’t sure he’d be able to make the right choice.

“I don’t know,” Yeosang finally reached out for a piece of chicken. “He seemed really no nonsense about it. He didn’t give a timeframe, but I don’t think he’d want to drag it out. You know?”

“I bet he has a bunch of guys who would say yes to him,” Mingi commented.

“That’s not helpful,” Yeosang gave him a look.

Hongjoong held up his hands, “no he’s right, this guy has to have a line of men wanting to fuck him.”

“But he doesn’t want to just fuck,” Yeosang pushed back. “He wants full scenes with a Dom, and you want a sub to learn with. We know that you’re both attracted to each other. It’s a win so far.”

“You know what?” Hongjoong threw his hands up. “Fuck it, give me his number.”

“Did he just give in?” Yunho looked genuinely surprised.

“No,” Yeosang held out his hand. “Give me your phone. We’re texting him right now.”

“We’re?” Hongjoong asked but he handed his phone over anyway. They all knew he’d never send the message on his own.

“Yes, we all are involved in his now,” Yeosang said as he entered in Hongjoong’s lock code and opened the texting app.

“I can’t believe we’re finally witnessing Hongjoong get the hot man he deserves,” Mingi cooed.

Hongjoong couldn’t process the teasing. His eyes were locked onto Yeosang’s fingers. He couldn’t read the message that his friend typed out, but he trusted that Yeosang wouldn’t make him look like an idiot. It felt like it was a little too late at night to be texting someone for the first time but no one else seemed worried about it.

“Okay there you go,” Yeosang handed Hongjoong his phone back. “Tell me when he replies.”

Hongjoong nodded and looked around at his three friends as they started a new conversation. All he could do was look at his phone as he reached out blindly towards the floor for his half drank soju bottle. Once he managed to get a hand on it, he took another sip from the bottle he looked down at the message Yeosang sent.

Hongjoong

Hi it’s Hongjoong

Yeosang gave me your number and said you might want to talk about doing a scene

Hongjoong nodded at the message as he cradled the bottle of soju between his arm and his side so he could hold his phone with two hands. A little gasp escaped his mouth when he saw a reply pop up. It had only taken Seonghwa a few minutes to answer him.

Seonghwa

Hi sorry I was just finishing up my skincare

I’d love to talk more though

Hongjoong’s fingers moved before he could stop himself.

Hongjoong

You really don’t care that I’m a novice?

“Hongjoong what are you doing?” Yeosang eyed him.

“Texting?” Hongjoong looked up from the phone.

“I told you to tell me first,” Yeosang whined.

“What did he say?” Mingi perked up.

“He said he’d love to talk more,” Hongjoong mumbled.

Seonghwa

Yeah it’s fine I mean it’s not a deal breaker as long as you’re not dumb

I’m more worried about your age

Hongjoong laughed.

Hongjoong

Don’t worry about that I don’t party or anything

I teach so I go home early and spend my weekends at home

Seonghwa

I’m more worried about you having an ego as a young Dom

Hongjoong’s stomach twisted at a stranger referring to him as a Dom. He wasn’t sure anyone had ever done that without belittling him after saying it.

Hongjoong

My friends humble me daily so that’s also not a worry

Seonghwa

Haha okay we’ll see.

Did you want to meet up to see if we click?

Hongjoong

Sure that sounds good

“What’s happening,” Mingi demanded.

“Give me a second,” Hongjoong waved his arm, but he didn’t look up from his phone.

Seonghwa

Can you meet up on Monday?

Is that too quick? We can text more if you want.

Hongjoong had to pause to set his phone down and rub both his hands on his pants. When had he started sweating? He didn’t feel nervous mentally, but his stomach was doing summersaults. This man already wanting to meet him was insane.

Hongjoong

Monday is good I just can’t meet anywhere until after school

Seonghwa

We can meet here at 6?

Hongjoong opened the link that Seonghwa sent. It was a trendy cafe in a richer part of town but it wasn’t too far from the school. He could easily walk there.

Hongjoong

6 is good

Seonghwa

See you then! Have a good night :)

Hongjoong

You too!

He set his phone down and looked up to see three sets of eyes locked onto him.

“What?” Hongjoong couldn’t hide his smile.

“I wanted to help,” Yeosang pouted.

“You’re smiling,” Yunho pointed out. “This is a good sign, right?”

“I’m going to meet him on Monday,” Hongjoong shifted. “Oh my god why did I agree to that?”

“You’re fine,” Mingi laughed. “Meeting up that quickly is good you won’t have a lot of time to freak out.”

“I can still freak out,” Hongjoong unscrewed the cap on his personal bottle of soju and finished it off.

Yunho laughed, “you’ll be okay. You just need to figure out how to woo your dream man.”

“He could be terrible,” Mingi pointed out.

“I don’t think so,” Yeosang cut in. “My couple loves him so he can’t be that bad.”

“I just need him to not be perfect,” Hongjoong nodded at himself. “I need to just lock in and get some experience with a very hot man.”

Yunho hummed, “arguably hotter than you deserve.”

“Hey,” Yeosang gave Yunho a look. “Our Joongie deserves nothing but the best.”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded.

Mingi laughed, “remember that when he’s freaking out all day on Monday.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh at that, “I’ll do my best to be calm.”

“You won’t,” Yeosang laughed.

“I won’t,” Hongjoong shook his head and laughed harder.

Chapter Text

Hongjoong watched horrified as two tiny hands reached out and gripped onto the edge of a bowl that was placed in front of them. When the child flung the bowl into the air he foolishly leaned to the side to block another child from being hit. The bowl of rice landed squarely on his chest before it fell onto his lap. Thankfully he was too stunned to be angry, and the chorus of tiny giggles around him kept him grounded.

“Oh no,” Yeosang came over to save the day. “Looks like you made a big mess.”

“Time to clean up,” Hongjoong gritted out.

“You can go I’ve got this,” Yeosang waved his arm towards the bathroom before he focused back on the children. “Now can you tell me why it was bad for you to throw that bowl?”

When Hongjoong closed the door behind him he opened his mouth like he was going to scream and balled up his fists. He was meeting Seonghwa after work. There was always a danger of the kids spilling things or being messy, but they hadn’t planned anything particularly dangerous that day. He hadn’t brought a change of clothes and now there was a dark stain trailing down his shirt to his pants. There was no way to save this. In a panic he pulled his shirt off and ran it under the water before he realized he had no way to truly wash it.

“Fuck,” Hongjoong mumbled to himself as he moved to hold the shirt under the hand dryer.

He had been distracted since he agreed to meet Seonghwa, and the only text they had exchanged since was a quick confirmation of the place and time that morning.

Hongjoong was going to look like a slob, or he was going to look underdressed and inapposite in his tank top that he always wore under his button-down shirts. With a heavy sigh he put his now damp shirt back onto his body with a groan. The way it stuck to his chest and stomach was uncomfortable, but he’d just have to deal with it. There were only a few more hours left in the day anyway.

Yeosang looked up at him when he finally left the bathroom and all Hongjoong could do was shrug. His shirt, and even the anxiety of meeting Seonghwa wasn’t the focus right now. They had a classroom full of children to teach and take care of, and he wasn’t about to let anything distract him from that task.

“Do you have another shirt?” Yeosang asked once the children were settled back in their seats and focused on their coloring worksheets.

“You know I don’t,” Hongjoong shook his head and shrugged.

“It’ll be okay,” Yeosang offered him a smile. “I’m sure once you let him know your job he’ll understand. He didn’t seem stuck up.”

Hongjoong bit his lip and nodded. It wouldn’t work if Seonghwa couldn’t handle a stained shirt, but that didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to be horrifically embarrassed about it anyway. He was an adult, the least he could have done was plan ahead and bring an extra set of clothes with him.

The second half of the day was mercifully uneventful. The children were all suspiciously well behaved and he couldn’t help but wonder about what Yeosang had said to them while he was in the bathroom. It couldn’t have been too harsh, but it was clearly enough to get their behavior back on track.

“I can do pick up alone if you want to head out,” Yeosang offered.

Hongjoong opened his mouth to reply as the little girl who threw the food onto him ran over and wrapped herself around his leg.

“Sorry,” she mumbled.

“Thank you for apologizing,” Hongjoong smiled down at her and gave her a pat on the head. “Now go get your things out of your cubby, your mom will be here to pick you up soon.”

He felt her give him a tight squeeze before she ran off. How could he stay mad at that?

“Yeah, you can go,” Yeosang nodded. “I don’t want to look at you until tomorrow.”

Hongjoong laughed, “okay.”

“Text me how it goes?” Yeosang gave him a smile. “You’ll be fine don’t be too nervous. It’s not like a real date anyway.”

Hongjoong nodded, “it’s like a job interview.”

“That’s the spirit,” Yeosang deadpanned before he made a face. “Go.”

Hongjoong waved him off with a smile before he went to grab his bag. It was already packed up and he didn’t need to do anything else to end his day. Before he left, Hongjoong checked in with Yeosang one more time to make sure it was okay to leave. He bowed at the parents and gave them little waves as he walked past the pickup line. Normally he’d stop and chat with them, but his nerves were starting to claw at his insides, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold a conversation with anyone. Not when the most attractive man he had ever seen was likely also on his way to the coffee shop to meet Hongjoong.

His only hope was that the pictures he saw of Seonghwa on instagram were old. There was no way the other man could be that stunning so close to forty. Hongjoong had never had a preference for older men before, but there was no denying the simple elegance that Seonghwa possessed in every single photo. It was something you didn’t see in younger people who were unsure of themselves.

Still, social media wasn’t real life. The photos could have been edited, even though Yeosang hadn’t mentioned Seonghwa looking any different in real life than his photos.

He was insane for wishing the other man wasn’t as attractive as he appeared to be, but it was Hongjoong’s only hope in the situation. Seonghwa needed to at least be a little human for him to be willing to give Hongjoong a chance.

The cafe was nearly empty when Hongjoong finally got there. He was early, but that gave him time to get his bearings and find a nice quiet table tucked away from everyone else. He didn’t want to risk their conversation being overheard by anyone.

When he scanned the room, his eyes froze on a blonde figure already seated at a table in the back. A cup was in front of the man as well as a slice of cake indicating that he had already been there for a while. Hongjoong inhaled sharply. Seonghwa’s posture was perfect though his head was bent down slightly, his hands were glued to his phone and a slight frown pulled at the corners of his lips. His blonde hair fell into his face, covering most of it, but Hongjoong’s pulse quickened anyway.

Seonghwa was real.

Hongjoong jumped as his phone vibrated in his pocket. As he fumbled to pull it out he watched Seonghwa set his own phone down, face up, before he picked up his cup of coffee.

Seonghwa

I’m here early

Hongjoong

I just waked in

His breath caught as Seonghwa’s frown deepened slightly before his head popped up. Hongjoong wanted to run but he stood frozen until Seonghwa’s wide eyes landed on him. They looked at each other for a moment until Hongjoong broke the spell by giving Seonghwa a dumb little wave. Hongjoong looked down out of embarrassment before he looked back up to see Seonghwa’s frown had been replaced with a small lopsided smile. Hongjoong pointed to the counter and Seonghwa gave him a nod before he turned to look back at his phone.

This was happening.

Hongjoong focused on ordering a drink and did his best to try and hide the way he continuously stole little sideways glances at Seonghwa. Somehow this felt like so much more than any date he had ever been on. In a lot of ways, it was. This wasn’t a date, this was a man who might be willing to engaged with him sexually. There was more hanging on this meeting than any date he had been on in the last few years. Even though they didn’t need to like each other romantically Hongjoong knew they still had to be compatible. He didn’t want to engage sexually with someone he didn’t even like.

Finally, his drink was done and with hands, that he didn’t even know were shaking, Hongjoong picked up the ceramic cup. He glared at his hands and willed them to stop moving. Hongjoong couldn’t risk another stain on his shirt, or the humiliation of dropping the cup on the floor. After a few deep breaths that he hoped were more discreet than they felt, Hongjoong headed towards Seonghwa at the back of the cafe.

Seonghwa stood when Hongjoong was only a step away and he reached out to take the cup from Hongjoong’s hands. The action was a little jarring, but Hongjoong let it happen. Seonghwa gently set the cup down on the table before his attention turned back to Hongjoong. He bowed slightly before he looked at Hongjoong expectantly.

“Thank you,” Hongjoong mumbled. “I’m sorry about my shirt. A little girl decided to throw her lunch at me.”

Seonghwa’s eyebrows raised slightly, and the corner of his lips twitched up into a slight smirk.

“I teach,” Hongjoong elaborated. “Sometimes the kids get kind of feral.”

Seonghwa nodded and Hongjoong tried his best not to panic as he sat down.

“I watch my friend’s twins every week,” Seonghwa smiled. “They like to cause chaos for the sake of it, but that might be their parents influence.”

Hongjoong nodded and shut his eyes for a long moment. Seonghwa’s voice was deep and soft in a way he hadn’t anticipated. Why was he perfect?

“I should really keep a change of clothes at work,” Hongjoong shrugged as he focused on his coffee cup. “I look like a mess.”

Seonghwa gave him a smile, “I’m too overdressed to be comfortable. We’re launching a new product at work soon, so everything is a little crazy and the meetings are starting to pile up.”

“What do you do?” Hongjoong asked innocently.

“I’m a marketing director for a skin care and make up company. I mostly deal with the skin care side of things,” Seonghwa shrugged but looked down like he was embarrassed about his success.

Hongjoong nodded dumbly. That explained why Seonghwa still looked flawless, save for a few lines around his eyes when he smiled.

Hongjoong wanted to see them more.

“Sounds stressful,” Hongjoong commented idly.

“That’s where you can help,” Seonghwa said evenly. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had a play partner, but I think it’ll be a fun stress reliever while I date.”

“While you date?” Hongjoong frowned. He knew this wasn’t a love match, but he wasn’t aware that the other man was going to be actively dating.

Seonghwa nodded, “yes. My divorce was finalized a few months ago.”

“Yeosang mentioned that part but not the dating,” Hongjoong tapped the side of his coffee cup with his index finger.

“My ex isn’t crazy or anything,” Seonghwa added. “It was as mutual as something like that can be, he moved out of the country anyway so there won’t be any drama or issues with him. I’m simply looking for someone to do some scenes with while I date. It’s a part of my life I’ve been missing. My ex wasn’t into things like that.”

Hongjoong nodded. He couldn’t get past how sweet and soft Seonghwa’s voice was.

“And I was told that you wanted experience?” Seonghwa added.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded. “I’m not sure why you’re willing to do this with me, but getting experience is my main focus. I’ve been on a lot of bad dates while trying to find someone that wants to be in a romantic relationship with me that has a power dynamic.”

“It’s hard to get both sometimes,” Seonghwa made a face.

“I can separate the two though,” Hongjoong clarified quickly. “I can keep sex and romance separate.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa let out a light laugh and Hongjoong found himself wondering how he could keep the other man laughing.

“I think we’re attracted to each other, right?” Seonghwa asked before his eyes dropped down to look at the floor. It was clearly something he did when he was nervous, and that made Hongjoong feel a little bit better about his own nerves.

“Yes,” Hongjoong answered quickly before he realized he might have been a little too eager. “I mean I think you’re very attractive Seonghwa. Please don’t worry about that.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa looked back up at Hongjoong with wide eyes. “You’re very handsome too.”

Hongjoong’s stomach swooped violently, and he gripped onto his coffee cup like it was the only real thing in the room. He was so absolutely fucked.

“I’m more worried about being a novice,” Hongjoong mumbled.

“It’s okay,” Seonghwa smiled. “You’re not like a full virgin, are you? Not that there would be anything wrong with that, I just don’t know if I’m comfortable with the potential emotional load that could come with that.”

Hongjoong laughed, “not a virgin, just no practical experience beyond some rougher nights.” He looked around to make sure that no one was listening to them.

Seonghwa hummed and brought his drink up to his lips. Hongjoong watched as he took a slip and then licked the foam off his upper lip.

“My schedule is busy,” Seonghwa started. “I’d like to meet on Fridays. I watch my friend’s children for them on Saturday nights.”

“So they can hook up with Yeosang,” Hongjoong said without thinking.

Seonghwa let out a delighted laugh, “yes, and they also like time and space to do more formal scenes as well.”

Hongjoong had the sense to blush, “I didn’t mean to out anyone or anything. I just assumed you knew the extent of their friendship. I’m not normally that much of a gossip.”

“I knew,” Seonghwa said as he reached up and finally moved his bangs from his eyes. “Wooyoung and San don’t really hide much from me.”

Hongjoong nodded. It was the first time he had heard their names.

“Anyway,” Seonghwa shifted. “So only Friday works for me, but I’d like to set up something weekly. I’d also like the scenes to be sexual in nature.”

“Of course yeah,” Hongjoong nodded. It had never occurred to him that they’d be doing anything nonsexual. He really needed to stop thinking with his dick.

“Is all of that okay with you?” Seonghwa pushed.

“Fridays and sexual,” Hongjoong gave him two thumbs up.

“And I’ll be dating,” Seonghwa added.

Hongjoong wanted to grimace, he wasn’t normally one to share, “that’s fine. I’d prefer it if you weren’t physical with your dates though.”

Seonghwa nodded and picked up his spoon. He scooped up a piece of his cake, “I’ll be taking things slowly with my dates.”

He popped the cake into his mouth, and it was all Hongjoong could do to not picture Seonghwa’s lips wrapped around his cock.

“I want to start a family,” Seonghwa elaborated after he swallowed. “That’s why it didn’t work out with my ex. Jumping into sleeping with someone isn’t really the best way to find the father of my future children.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but think that he’d give Seonghwa as many babies as he wanted.

“Smart,” Hongjoong nodded. “I guess knowing you’ve already got something weekly helps keep those urges at bay.”

“Scenes will also help with my anxiety and work stress,” Seonghwa stated simply. “Obviously I don’t want to get too deep into that in public though.”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong agreed. “I’m not normally into talking about these things in public.”

Seonghwa smiled, “me either you never know who’s listening and if they’d be okay hearing it.”

“Did you want,” Hongjoong paused. “To meet up again to talk about the details and your um interests?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa answered quickly with a laugh. “That would be nice. Do you have a checklist you like to use?”

Hongjoong panicked, “no. I can find one or make one though.”

“It’s okay,” Seonghwa scooped up another piece of his cake. “I can send you one I’ve used before. It shouldn’t be too hard to fill out it’ll just be things you’re interested in because you don’t really have experience.”

Hongjoong didn’t want to wait. He wanted to know everything about Seonghwa now so he could keep things moving forward. A part of him already knew that he’d be willing to do anything to keep Seonghwa satisfied. He could get over an ick if it meant Seonghwa was happy.

“I have a feeling everything is going to line up though,” Seonghwa added.

“What? Sorry,” Hongjoong smiled. “I was just thinking.”

“Imagining?” Seonghwa asked with a smirk.

“Not yet,” Hongjoong shook his head. He wasn’t about to admit to what he was really thinking just yet.

“I said I have a feeling that we’ll line up well enough,” Seonghwa smiled. “Plus, there’s likely a lot you’d like to try. I’m happy to be your doll.”

Hongjoong froze at the phrasing but forced himself to nod after a few long seconds. He couldn’t think about any of the things he’d like to try, because he couldn’t risk getting hard in a coffee shop.

“Well,” Seonghwa shifted. “If you’d like we can meet up again on Wednesday? I can get a checklist to you tonight.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded.

“We can meet at my apartment. Yeosang said you had roommates,” Seonghwa shrugged. “It’ll give us some more privacy, but I can get a hotel room weekly if you’re more comfortable with that.”

“Your apartment is fine,” Hongjoong brought his cup to his mouth and took a long sip. “There’s no need to spend money on hotels.”

Seonghwa flashed him a bright smile, “okay good. Now that we’ve settled all that what age do you teach?”

Hongjoong let out a relieved laugh, “mostly five year olds. Yeosang and I teach together.”

“That’s cute,” Seonghwa commented as he continued to eat his cake. “I wanted to teach when I was younger but my dad wanted me to go into business, so I did.”

“Kids are great,” Hongjoong commented. “They’re so smart and funny.”

“That’s why I want some of my own,” Seonghwa smiled. “And other reasons but I won’t bore you with those.”

Hongjoong wanted to know, but he didn’t want to be too eager. Yes, it mattered what kind of a person Seonghwa was, but it didn’t matter what kind of partner he was.

“I hope you have better luck dating than I have,” Hongjoong laughed as he finished off his drink in one long sip.

Seonghwa sat back, “I don’t think I’ll be looking for the same things you are. The things we want are a nice addition to a relationship, but I can be okay without out it. I was okay without it.”

“But you missed it,” Hongjoong pointed out without thinking.

Seonghwa frowned slightly, “we all miss things when we get into relationships.”

“No,” Hongjoong sat up a little straighter. “You don’t need to compromise that much if you don’t want to.”

There was a beat where Hongjoong was convinced he had said too much but Seonghwa just let out an airy laugh.

“What?” Hongjoong frowned.

“Now I know why it was so hard for you to date,” Seonghwa laughed a little more.

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I promise it wasn’t just me being picky.”

Seonghwa hummed, “I’ll take your word for it.”

Hongjoong nodded and scrambled to fill the silence, but Seonghwa beat him too it.

“You can head home if you want,” Seonghwa shrugged. “I think we’re good and I’m sure you want to get out of that shirt.”

“I do,” Hongjoong nodded. “I tried to wash it in the bathroom sink without thinking about how I was going to dry it, so it’s been sticking to me all day.”

Seonghwa laughed, “yeah go home. I’ll text you tonight.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong slid his chair back and watched, amused, as Seonghwa scrambled to stand up. “I’ll talk to you later.”

Seonghwa nodded, “have a good night Hongjoong.”

“You too Seonghwa,” Hongjoong reached out to pick up his cup.

“I can take care of that,” Seonghwa said quickly. “It’s not a problem.”

Hongjoong gave him one last smile before he turned and headed out of the cafe. On the way home he pulled out his phone to text Yeosang, but he was surprised to see there was already a message waiting for him.

Yeosang

How did it go

Hongjoong

I’m willing to die trying to get him pregnant

Yeosang

Disgusting

**

Hongjoong was stuck blinking blindly at the checklist that Seonghwa had sent him. It was already Wednesday, and he was sitting during his lunch break looking over the checklist that was neatly displayed on an excel file. The first tab at the bottom had his name and the second tab had Seonghwa’s name.

The school wasn’t exactly an ideal location to be looking over and rating kinks, but he had procrastinated the list long enough. It wasn’t that he was too lazy to put the effort into filling it out properly. Hongjoong was worried that once Seonghwa saw how inexperienced he was on paper that he’d back out immediately. There was also the nagging thought in the back of his mind that Seonghwa’s ex hadn’t wanted to engage in kink because Seonghwa’s kinks were so niche that they were hard to fulfil. It was ridiculous but Hongjoong couldn’t hide his anxiety.

Now he sat uncomfortably at his desk with his eyes locked onto the word armbinders wondering if he could get through this without getting hard. Seonghwa was clearly patient but also demanding. He had sent Hongjoong his address that morning, but it came with a reminder that he still hadn’t gotten Hongjoong’s checklist, and he wanted to look at it before they spoke.

Armbinders, no experience, yes he would like to try, and he would like to give not receive them.

The list being in alphabetical order was cruel, and his procrastination trapped him. The word collars mocked him. Of course he liked collars. Hongjoong was simple. He liked signs of ownership, but did that even matter with Seonghwa? He’d never collar him. Seonghwa was just fooling around until he found his next husband. A collar from a part time Dom didn’t factor into that.

Collars in private, no experience, fetish needed, he would like to give not receive.

Collars in public, no experience, yes he would like to try, he would like to give not receive.

It was one of the longest checklists he had ever seen, but somehow that felt true to Seonghwa’s character. Hongjoong didn’t know Seonghwa, but the other man seemed like he enjoyed paying attention to detail. Hongjoong didn’t personally think that there needed to be seven different gags listed, but it would make things easier in the long run. Eventually the checklist would become a document that he referenced to give Seonghwa what he needed.

His cheeks started to heat up when Hongjoong moved from the bondage category to the bodily fluids category. Almost everywhere you could cum was listed, and Hongjoong couldn’t help but look up and around nervously. There was only a half hour left of his break, fifteen minutes for the kids to eat, and a fifteen minute break for a recess.

Rimming (oral/anal play), tried, rated 5, fetish needed, give or receive.

The fetish section went quickly, and he marked most things as a maybe. He’d love to see Seonghwa in lingerie and maybe heels, but he didn’t know if he’d want to see all his future partners dressed like that. Hongjoong’s brain paused again on humiliation, and he glanced at the clock. He needed to go with his gut and adjust as needed. He should have given himself time to think deeply about everything the night before, but he was too busy being anxious about the possibilities of what could happen.

Humiliation in private, no experience, would like to try, he would like to give not receive.

Humiliation in public, no experience, no desire to try.

Impact play was easy to get through. Nearly everything was something he wanted to try, and he couldn’t help but be relieved that he could mark down that he was experienced with something. It was just hand to ass spanking but it was something he was confident with. An ex of his had loved it, and Hongjoong had been too much of a coward to ask for more. He should have pushed, but at the same time he’d never forget how the weight of their body felt squirming in his lap as he spanked them over his knees.

Fifteen minutes left.

He was tempted to write no next to non-monogamy, but something itched at his brain not too. Maybe he wouldn’t want to share a sub, but he wasn’t against them wanting to share him. Hongjoong also wasn’t opposed to showing off how good his sub could be to others. Maybe he was only against nonmonogamy in a romantic sense. His future partner was going to be his, and his alone. That didn’t matter with Seonghwa though. They’d never belong to each other.

Marking was an easy kink to agree to. Hongjoong didn’t need anything permanent, but he did like to leave reminders. Role play was something he was less into than he thought, and the classroom topic made him laugh out loud. Thankfully it helped some of the tension that had built up leave his body.

Breath Control (choking), tired, rated 5, yes he wants to try again, would like to give not receive.

Hongjoong needed to let out a deep breath and close his eyes after the Sensation Play category before he moved onto the Service & Restricted/Controlled behavior category. He felt rush but it was as good as he could do given the circumstances.

Bathroom use control, no experience, yes he wants to try, would like to give no receive.

He swallowed and breezed through the Penetration category and went into Voyeurism/Exhibitionism. They didn’t get the attention they deserved but he wanted to send the email before the kids got back into the classroom. Hongjoong finished filling everything out and added his health history and allergies before he saved the document and sent it back to Seonghwa.

The bell rang, and Hongjoong realized he hadn’t gotten a chance to look at Seonghwa’s tab. This wasn’t a mistake he could come back from.

The end of the day came quickly and how busy he had been meant that Hongjoong hadn’t gotten a chance to step away and look at Seonghwa’s list. The children had chosen that day to be their most chaotic selves and Hongjoong found himself just trying to ride the wave of their emotions. He had never been more thankful to have a co-teacher before.

When the last child left the room, they both let out a heavy sigh before they began their end of day routine.

“I guess Seonghwa liked you,” Yeosang commented.

“You need to stop gossiping about me,” Hongjoong frowned.

“Can’t do that,” Yeosang laughed. “One of the dads likes to gossip. He has a big mouth.”

“I know their names now,” Hongjoong smiled. “San and Wooyoung.”

Yeosang looked away with a small smile before he looked back at Hongjoong, “Wooyoung is the gossip.”

Hongjoong hummed and shrugged, “I’m seeing Seonghwa again tonight. I already knew he liked me enough to move forward.”

“That’s exciting,” Yeosang smiled.

“It’s good,” Hongjoong nodded. He wanted to out himself as nervous and unable to do the simplest of tasks, but he stopped himself.

His friends already knew too much about his love life and by extension his sex life. They didn’t need to know every little detail about what was going on now. There was also something in the back of his head that was telling him to keep parts of whatever was beginning with Seonghwa close to his chest. It felt special even if it wasn’t. Maybe it was just the thrill of first times, but it felt more private than any of his previous partners.

“Send me the location?” Yeosang asked quietly. “For safety.”

Hongjoong laughed but pulled out his phone and sent Yeosang the address anyway, “send the cops if you don’t seem me tomorrow morning.”

“Do you know where this is?” Yeosang frowned.

“Yeah, I don’t really want to think about it too much,” Hongjoong laughed.

“Idols and actors live in those buildings,” Yeosang shook his head.

“And your couple have a house just outside of the city,” Hongjoong shrugged. “They’re all older they should be successful.”

“Oh, someone’s grumpy today,” Yeosang commented with a laugh. “You can get going. Hopefully Seonghwa turns that frown upside down.”

Hongjoong resisted the urge to say anything back and settled on shaking his head before he grabbed his messenger bag. It was true that Seonghwa lived in an exclusive neighborhood, but that didn’t feel weird now that Hongjoong knew what he did for work. Why would Seonghwa settle somewhere else if he could afford the best? It was just another difference between them that Hongjoong had tried desperately not to think about.

The train ride was quick and Hongjoong texted Seonghwa when he was near the entrance of the building. He was worried about being turned away even though Seonghwa had assured Hongjoong that he left his name with security and they would let him access the elevator. It eased his anxiety when Seonghwa agreed to meet him in the lobby even though the text was punctuated with an upside-down smiley face.

With a soft click the doors to the building opened automatically and there was Seonghwa with his blonde hair slicked back wearing a flowing pair of pants and a tight shirt. Hongjoong couldn’t help but think that Seonghwa was likely better looking than most of the celebrities that lived in the same tower.

“Hi,” Hongjoong gave Seonghwa a small bow and shot him a smile.

“You were worried about nothing,” Seonghwa commented lightly.

Hongjoong gave him a look and Seonghwa just laughed before he turned to walk towards the front desk.

“This is Kim Hongjoong, please remember him. He’s my guest and will likely be over every Friday night for a while and maybe some other days,” Seonghwa said to the two people standing behind the desk before he turned to Hongjoong. “They’ll need your ID.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong scrambled over to the desk while he tried to pull his wallet out of his bag at the same time. He fumbled and nearly dropped his wallet but eventually got his ID out and handed it to the security team.

“Just a precaution,” one of the men said.

“I understand,” Hongjoong nodded.

“It seems worse than it is,” Seonghwa shrugged. “It’s to keep fans out, but all the idols and actors go up through the parking garage under the buildings anyway.”

Hongjoong nodded.

“Disappointed you won’t see an idol?” Seonghwa teased.

“I don’t need to see an idol,” Hongjoong replied quietly. “Just you.”

Seonghwa’s nose and cheeks turned a pretty pink almost instantly and Hongjoong couldn’t help but feel proud of himself. The security guard waved his ID at him.

“You’re on file now Mr. Kim just check in with your ID next time and we’ll let you on the elevator,” the man instructed.

“Sounds good,” Hongjoong nodded. “Thank you.”

“Have a good night,” Seonghwa gave them a wave before he shifted to move towards the elevators.

Hongjoong watched as he held his phone up to the pad below the button to call the elevator. When they were on, Seonghwa held his phone up again and hit the button for the eighth floor.

“It only lets me onto my floor,” Seonghwa explained. “There are some big names that live here, but I’m not that important. I like the security, but it seems like a lot sometimes.”

"I can see where it would be tiring,” Hongjoong commented.

“I don’t actually have a lot of people over because of it,” Seonghwa admitted as the elevator jerked to a stop. “This way.”

Seonghwa pointed to the right and Hongjoong followed him like a lost puppy. The hallway wasn’t remarkable in any way, but it was littered with obvious cameras that likely constantly recorded every inch of the hallway.

“Here we are,” Seonghwa held his phone up once again to a black box under the plaque with his apartment number 801. “I got slippers for you. I guessed on the size though.”

“Thank you,” Hongjoong bowed and looked for a place to put his bag.

Seonghwa held his hand out for it wordlessly and Hongjoong shrugged it off with a smile before he bent to untie his shoes before he slid them off.

“Hopefully I can do that for you someday,” Seonghwa commented idly.

“What?” Hongjoong blinked at him.

“We are here to talk about those things Hongjoong don’t look so surprised,” Seonghwa laughed. “I like acts of service. Taking your shoes off is an easy way to show respect and submission.”

“I just wasn’t expecting that,” Hongjoong looked down. He felt his cheeks getting hot, but he knew things were only going to get more explicit from that point on.

“Would you like a drink? I have some sparkling water or even soda. I don’t know what you like,” Seonghwa looked nervous, and Hongjoong didn’t really know what to do with that. He was the one that was supposed to be nervous.

“Can I just have some flat water?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “You can sit at the table.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong gave him a smile and when Seonghwa disappeared he took a moment to take in the apartment. It wasn’t as large or extravagant as he would have expected, but it was impeccably decorated and not a single item looked like it was out of place.

“Is everything okay?” Seonghwa’s voice asked.

“Of course,” Hongjoong turned to him and smiled. “You have a beautiful apartment. It’s not as fancy as I thought it would be, but that balcony looks huge.”

Seonghwa smiled, “it’s why I bought the place after the divorce. I was chain smoking and wanted somewhere to do it that wasn’t inside of the house.”

Hongjoong let out a quick bark of a laugh. He hadn’t expected that reasoning or that level of honesty.

“I quit,” Seonghwa added quickly. “It was just a stress thing.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong couldn’t help but look amused. “I didn’t question if you quit.”

“I only do it when I’m stressed at work,” Seonghwa whined out the confession.

“Do you need help quitting?” Hongjoong asked without thinking. He covered his mouth with his hand and looked at an equally surprised Seonghwa.

“Maybe, eventually,” Seonghwa answered quietly as he finally sat down.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Hongjoong offered him a smile.

“Okay, so, where would you like to start?” Seonghwa blinked at Hongjoong.

“I need to be honest,” Hongjoong swallowed roughly. “I didn’t get a chance to look at your list, so I was hoping to go over things now. Honestly, I had to do mine at lunch today.”

“I don’t like that you might have been rushed doing your list,” Seonghwa frowned. “Are you taking this seriously? Do you need more time?”

“No,” Hongjoong said in a near panic. “I’m taking this seriously I promise. This isn’t even a novice issue, this is a me thing.”

“Explain,” Seonghwa dryly requested.

“I was nervous,” Hongjoong answered and reached for his glass of water. He chugged down half of it and looked at Seonghwa who was waiting for him to elaborate. “I didn’t want to make my list based off what you’re into just because I’m so attracted to you. I don’t want my first experience to be me losing myself. I was also worried that you might have some more niche kinks that I just can’t engage with. I really want to be everything that you’re looking for, so I think I put too much pressure on myself.”

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa’s eyebrows went up and his mouth twitched into a smile, “okay that’s acceptable, and my main kinks are very typical. I might be more extreme with some of them, but that’s not a starting point with any partner.”

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong said honestly as he grabbed for his water again.

“It’s okay. Please try to prioritize this partnership, and if you have reservations just text me,” Seonghwa stood up unexpectedly and Hongjoong readied himself to be kicked out. “Would you like dinner?”

“What?” Hongjoong breathed out a puff of air.

“I do cook, but I ordered in tonight,” Seonghwa elaborated. “Nothing fancy, but I figured this was dinner time for both of us.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong nodded. “Yes, please.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa walked out of sight and returned quickly with a laptop. He set it down in front of Hongjoong. “Please review my list while I get your dinner ready.”

“I can do that,” Hongjoong nodded several times.

Right now, he didn’t feel like the Dom. Hongjoong didn’t know if Seonghwa was throwing subtle acts of service at him or if he was just being a good host. Either way he felt humiliated over the way he procrastinated the checklists. He still felt good about his answers, but he didn’t know if he should have explored them further.

His heart leaped into his throat as he looked at the first section. Seonghwa was apparently very into bondage and very experienced with it. Hongjoong also instantly saw that he was wrong to make fun of so many gag types when Seonghwa had inflatable and tape marked as hard limits. He couldn’t do this, he needed to leave. He had to apologize and get out of there with whatever was left of his dignity.

“Why do you look sick?” Seonghwa’s voice snapped him back to attention.

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong fumbled to stand up. “I’m not what you’re looking for. This is a bad idea. I don’t have any experience, and you know exactly what you want.”

Seonghwa set a large plate with an assortment of kimbap on it down, along with two smaller plates and two sets of chop sticks before he calmly looked at Hongjoong who was so close to bolting out the door.

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa said firmly.

“Yes?” Hongjoong leaned forward with his hands on the table in an attempt to ground himself.

“We’re going to progress slowly, you’ll make mistakes, so will I. We just need to talk,” Seonghwa’s tone evened out into something soft and sweet. “I don’t mind your lack of experience I just need to know what you’re thinking. We have to communicate well, and you need to want to do this.”

“I want it too much,” Hongjoong groaned.

Seonghwa laughed at him, “you’re going to give me an ego.”

“You deserve it though,” Hongjoong said back quickly. “I don’t deserve to have you fall out of the sky into my lap.”

“I did see that you were experienced with over the knee spanking,” Seonghwa smiled. “If you look that’s something I enjoy. We match up in a lot of ways.”

“I just don’t understand why you want to take a risk with me. I didn’t even understand why some gags wouldn’t be okay,” Hongjoong brought one hand up to cover his face.

“Because you looked at the checklist for an hour and you might not have seen one that in depth before,” Seonghwa shook his head with a smile. “Hongjoong, listen, I think you’re attractive. Physically you’re very much my type. I like the fact that you’re younger than me but still old enough to have similar life experiences. You also seem serious about this and being a good Dom even if you are giving off lost puppy vibes at the moment. Plus, maybe I kind of get off on the idea of a Dom using me as some kind of test subject.”

“That last point sounds like a red flag,” Hongjoong mumbled.

Seonghwa laughed, “don’t be like that.”

“You just want to corrupt a hot young guy,” Hongjoong pouted as some of the anxiety left his system.

“If you’d look at the checklist, you’d see that I want a hot young guy to push me around a little and rough me up,” Seonghwa commented with a smile.

Hongjoong let out a puff of air and finally sank back into his seat.

“I’m going to be honest with you though,” Seonghwa started as he began to place some of the kimbap onto a plate for Hongjoong. “I’m not really into you second guessing yourself because of your experience or because you think I’m out of your league. We both agreed to be here together. If it happens again, I’m going to have to call this off. Just tell me if you’re feeling insecure. I’ll do the same okay?”

“Okay,” Hongjoong bit his lip and nodded. “Thank you for the food.”

“It’s from one of my favorite places. I’ve been eating there since university,” Seonghwa smiled.

“I’m sure I’ll love it,” Hongjoong smiled back at him.

“Anyway, I see you got to gags,” Seonghwa waved his hand. “Inflatable and tape make me feel trapped that’s why they’re a hard limit. I prefer ball gags.”

“I should take notes,” Hongjoong looked from the computer to Seonghwa helplessly.

“You can use the computer and email it to yourself,” Seonghwa laughed. “This is why I’m okay with doing scenes with you. You’re instinctively saying a lot of right things, you’re just getting in your own way.”

Hongjoong nodded and shoved a piece of food in his mouth so he’d be forced to think before he spoke.

“I filled it out without you in mind completely, as much as I could have, that’s why collars were marked so high,” Hongjoong explained. “I don’t think that we’ll get to that point.”

“Maybe,” Seonghwa shrugged. “They can just be pretty they don’t have to be formal.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong’s eyes went a little wide before he recovered. “I didn’t think of that.”

“You didn’t think about me in a collar?” Seonghwa cocked his head to the side with a small smile.

Hongjoong resisted the urge to roll his eyes, “you’re a brat.”

“Sometimes,” Seonghwa said with a delighted smile. “Anyway, when it comes to rope bondage I’m okay with simple things, but I’d like you to practice knots first and we’ll need safety scissors.”

“Understandable,” Hongjoong waved his hand. “I don’t want to cut off your circulation or anything.”

“Exactly,” Seonghwa nodded. “There’s lots of other options for bondage anyway.”

“Do you have any toys?” Hongjoong questioned before he put more food in his mouth.

“Not really,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Just a few simple toys nothing of note.”

“I need to know what you have so I know what to get,” Hongjoong looked at Seonghwa expectantly.

“You don’t need to spend money on me,” Seonghwa laughed.

Hongjoong shook his head, “anything bondage or restraint related would really just be me buying for myself.”

“Or for impact,” Seonghwa added helpfully.

Hongjoong clicked his tongue and nodded. Rather than replying he decided to eat a little more of the food that Seonghwa had gotten them.

“I’m also into lingerie, but I can provide that for myself,” Seonghwa mentioned. “I already have a collection. It’s a little neglected, but I’d love an excuse to wear it.”

“Lingerie?” Hongjoong felt like he had swallowed his own tongue. There was no way he was that lucky.

“Oh, is that not something you’re okay with?” Seonghwa frowned at himself.

“No,” Hongjoong said a little louder than he needed to. “That’s fine, that’s really super fine and okay. I’m very into that with you.”

“Okay good,” Seonghwa smiled to himself.

“So, it seems like you’re a bit of a masochist,” Hongjoong commented. “I guess pain isn’t a punishment for you.”

Seonghwa’s lips instantly turned down into a pout and Hongjoong couldn’t help but let out a light little laugh, “how did you already realize that?”

“I don’t know, maybe all the experienced fives under anything involving pain or impact,” Hongjoong let out a louder laugh. “It’s okay. I can be into that too. We’ll just have to figure out marks and stuff because of the whole dating thing.”

“And punishments,” Seonghwa mumbled.

“I can be creative when I need to be,” Hongjoong smiled. “You don’t need to pout I’m sure you’ll be good for me.”

“I won’t,” Seonghwa admitted.

“More fun for me I guess,” Hongjoong looked from Seonghwa to the computer. “Do you just want to go through item by item?”

“I think that would be best,” Seonghwa nodded and reached out to finally serve himself some food.

They slowly worked their way through the list, mostly highlighting things that Seonghwa was into that matched up with things that Hongjoong was curious about. He took notes as they went and didn’t miss the way Seonghwa would smile when Hongjoong asked him to pause so he could add a note for a limit or something that Seonghwa wasn’t into.

When it came down to it Seonghwa did just want someone to push him around. His interests leaned towards masochism, and that was something that Hongjoong could happily work with. He knew he’d have to do more research regarding different kinds of impact play, and he knew he was going to have to decide on some punishments that didn’t resort to that. Right now, he didn’t know Seonghwa well enough to know what would get under his skin enough to be considered a punishment.

“Did you want to take the rest of the food home to your roommates?” Seonghwa asked once they were through with the list.

“Sure,” Hongjoong smiled.

Seonghwa disappeared for a moment, and Hongjoong let his eyes linger on the other man’s ass as he walked away. The fact that he’d have his hands on it soon drove him crazy. Part of Hongjoong still didn’t believe that someone so perfect had just appeared right when he had given up.

“What do you want to be called in scene?” Seonghwa asked when he appeared again with two take out containers.

“Sir is fine,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I’m not sure I’d mind Hongjoong though.”

“Sir will work,” Seonghwa answered firmly as he started to pack up the containers.

“Do you have any names you don’t like?” Hongjoong asked with his hands already on the keyboard.

Seonghwa gave him the same smile he had throughout the night, “not really. I don’t like anything too degrading, but nothing is a trigger for me or an ick.”

“Do you like praise?” Hongjoong looked from the computer to Seonghwa’s face.

“I do,” Seonghwa looked down and his hair fell over his face. “Do you think we’re good to move onto a test scene?”

Hongjoong forced himself to pause so he didn’t seem too eager, “yes. I think we’re good for that.”

“I’m glad you’re less nervous,” Seonghwa laughed. “If you didn’t calm down, I was going to call it off.”

“I’m just holding the panic in now,” Hongjoong joked.

Seonghwa let out a dry laugh, “do you have any other boundaries that you want to talk about before you leave?”

Hongjoong paused, then sighed, “I don’t know if this is overstepping but I was serious when I said I didn’t want you to be physical with any of your dates.”

"Fair,” Seonghwa nodded. “It wouldn’t be safe for you.”

“It is a risk,” Hongjoong nodded. “Who knows what kind of degenerates you’re going out on dates with.”

Seonghwa hummed, “I save the degenerates for my Doms.”

“Hey,” Hongjoong laughed.

Now that he was seeing some of Seonghwa’s humor he was really starting to like the other man.

“You’ll have to allow me some goodnight kisses,” Seonghwa pouted.

“I don’t want you kissing them either,” Hongjoong replied without thinking.

His eyes went wide as he gauged Seonghwa’s reaction. They hadn’t even tested out their dynamic and Hongjoong was already dictating what Seonghwa could or couldn’t do with his dates.

“Okay,” Seonghwa laughed out. “I can agree to that too.”

“You can tell me if I’m overstepping,” Hongjoong looked at him seriously.

“I will,” Seonghwa replied. “It’s okay. I want to move slow, and this will help me do that. It’s not just dating for me it’s finding someone to help raise a family and spend the rest of my life with. I can hold off on kissing.”

“You want to do the scene on Friday?” Hongjoong asked to change the topic.

“That works,” Seonghwa nodded. “What did you want to do?”

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “What do you want to do?”

Seonghwa let out a delighted laugh, “maybe just you ordering me around a little bit and some oral?”

“On me or you?” Hongjoong asked seriously as he took notes.

“On you,” Seonghwa nodded to himself. “It’s been a while, and in the past I’ve liked my throat to be used so I think that would be a nice place to start.”

Hongjoong finished typing the request before he looked up at Seonghwa again, “and you? How do you want to get off?”

“You can decide if I deserve it and how it happens,” Seonghwa bowed his head slightly and blushed.

“Okay,” Hongjoong smiled and pressed a few more buttons on the computer before he gently closed it.

“So, I’ll see you on Friday?” Seonghwa asked as Hongjoong stood up.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong smiled. “I’m excited.”

“Don’t worry yourself into anxiety,” Seonghwa shoved the two containers of food at Hongjoong before he disappeared around a corner.

“I won’t,” Hongjoong lied as he walked closer towards the door.

He set the food containers on the floor before he toed his house slippers off and reached for his actual shoes. Hongjoong didn’t know when Seonghwa showed back up, but when he looked back up Seonghwa was there holding his bag.

“Thank you,” Hongjoong took his bag and stood awkwardly. Should they hug? Was that what people who just spent hours talking about what got them off did?

“I’ll text you a time, but I think around eight would work best,” Seonghwa commented.

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded, and he settled on giving Seonghwa a little wave before he all but ran out of the apartment.

After a brief walk down the street Hongjoong decided to get a taxi. It wasn’t late, but he didn’t feel like navigating the crowds in the subway. He had so much to plan because he wasn’t willing to let Seonghwa down again.

Thankfully the ride was quick and quiet. Hongjoong focused on the containers of kimbap in his hands until the taxi rolled to a stop. He paid quickly and slipped out of the door and into his apartment. The lack of security was glaring after Seonghwa’s building, but they lived in different worlds. Someday Hongjoong would be able to live alone but that was really all he could hope for. He’d never be in a position financially to live in a luxury apartment surrounded by celebrities.

“How did it go?” Mingi yelled as soon as the door clicked open.

Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh as he shut the door behind him, “good. I’m going back over Friday. I have food.”

“You got us a sugar daddy?” Mingi questioned as he plucked the containers out of Hongjoong’s hands.

“It’s kimbap,” Hongjoong shook his head fondly. “It’s not anything fancy.”

“I like that I’m already getting perks,” Mingi wandered towards the kitchen. “Tell him I said thank you.”

“How do you know I didn’t ask to take the food home?” Hongjoong grumbled.

“Because you didn’t,” Mingi shrugged. “I bet you were too busy freaking out.”

“Only a little,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I’ll tell him you said thank you.”

Mingi shot him a bright smile, “I’m glad it’s working out.”

“Me too,” Hongjoong answered with his own smile. “I have to go crash though. I’m losing sleep.”

“Yeah,” Mingi waved him off as he popped the lid off one of the containers. “Oh tuna.”

Hongjoong suppressed a laugh as he headed towards his bedroom. He stripped down to his briefs before he collapsed onto his bed and let himself drift off to sleep.

**

Hongjoong could feel his stomach clench in distinct waves of panic and nerves as he walked up to the doors of Seonghwa’s building. This time there was a man waiting to open them with a deep bow. Hongjoong awkwardly bowed back before he made his way to the desk. He quietly mumbled his name as he adjusted the backpack on his shoulders. First time nerves were fine, they were normal, he could do this. Hongjoong couldn’t help but feel like he didn’t belong in that building though, and everything in his body wanted to turn and walk out.

“Mr. Kim, here’s a pass,” the man said as he handed a credit card sized piece of white plastic to Hongjoong. “Mr. Park requested that you be given a pass.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide, and he bowed. “Thank you.”

“It only works for his floor,” the man continued.

“That’s all I need,” Hongjoong waved his hand with a smile.

“Enjoy your evening,” the man replied as he bowed back.

With a new confidence Hongjoong entered the elevator. He tapped the white card to the censor before he pressed the button for the correct floor. It was about to happen. Everything that he had been fantasizing about for years was about to be real. He was finally going to get to experience his first formal scene.

Hongjoong let out one more exaggerated puff of air before he pressed the button for Seonghwa’s doorbell. The chime hadn’t even finished playing when the door opened to reveal Seonghwa standing in the same kind of flowing clothing he had on for Hongjoong’s last visit.

“Come in,” Seonghwa stood to the side.

Hongjoong walked in and let Seonghwa take his backpack.

“Do you need anything in here?” Seonghwa asked quietly.

Hongjoong shook his head, “no.”

Hongjoong watched Seonghwa disappear with his bag and then reappear quickly biting his bottom lip.

“Can I,” Seonghwa asked quietly.

“Can you what Seonghwa?” Hongjoong pushed back.

“Take your shoes off?” Seonghwa looked down at the floor and then back up at Hongjoong.

“You can,” Hongjoong nodded.

His breath caught in his throat as Seonghwa dropped to his knees delicately and slowly.

“Did you want to start now?” Hongjoong asked unsure of how exactly to move forward.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa looked up with a smirk before he reached out with both hands. One gripped onto Hongjoong’s calf and the other plucked at the laces of his sneaker.

Hongjoong looked down before he raised his head and nodded a few times. He could do this.

“Tell me your safe word,” Hongjoong brough a hand down to touch Seonghwa’s head.

“Green is go, yellow is slow down, red is stop,” Seonghwa answered quickly as he slipped off Hongjoong’s sneaker and replaced it with a slipper.

“And if your mouth is full?” Hongjoong pushed. He was still trying to find his footing, but everything felt okay so far.

Seonghwa looked up again and ran his fingers over Hongjoong’s other calf before he pinched it harder than necessary. Hongjoong’s eyes went wide. He hadn’t thought about what he’d do if Seonghwa pushed him. Out of reflex he tightened his hand in Seonghwa’s hair giving it a little tug before he let it go. They were still testing boundaries, no matter how masochistic Seonghwa seemed Hongjoong didn’t know where the lines were. That’s what tonight was about.

When both of his shoes were off Hongjoong found himself standing stupidly with Seonghwa still on his knees looking up at him waiting for some kind of instruction. He had thought about this moment so much over the last few days that he suddenly realized with panic that he didn’t know what to do with it. Right now, he could do anything, but the wrong move would mean that Seonghwa wouldn’t welcome him back.

“Should I strip?” Seonghwa offered.

Hongjoong could only nod.

“Follow me,” Seonghwa offered him a little half smile.

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa leaned forward until he was supporting himself on his hands and knees. He crawled into the living room area and onto a soft rug before he turned around. Hongjoong took the few steps across the apartment until he was standing in front of Seonghwa again. He looked behind himself and made the easy decision to sit down on the couch. When he sat, he spread his legs a little wider than necessary and looked at Seonghwa expectantly.

Seonghwa slowly stood up and pulled his shirt off with little fanfare. When he turned to fold the article of clothing Hongjoong couldn’t do much more than marvel at how Seonghwa’s lean muscles moved under his skin. He wanted to leave marks across the smooth unblemished skin, and he was sure that Seonghwa wanted the same. That wasn’t what the evening was about though. This was a test, and he had to pass it.

Once the neatly folded shirt was set on the coffee table Seonghwa bent to remove his socks. He folded them together before he set them down and went for the button of his pants. Hongjoong didn’t know where to look. Seonghwa’s body was lean and the closest to perfect he had ever seen. His wide shoulders tapered down to a small waist that Hongjoong was dying to grab. He couldn’t help but lick his lips as his eyes traveled up from Seonghwa’s stomach past the faint outline of his abs to his chest. Hongjoong quickly found himself trying to remember if Seonghwa was into nipple clamps or not. Either way he couldn’t wait to get his mouth on them.

Then Seonghwa’s soft pants fell to the floor leaving the man in a tight pair of briefs with a larger than expected bulge pushing at the front of them. Hongjoong looked up at Seonghwa’s face quickly and smiled at the pink that dusted his cheeks and the bridge of his nose.

“Fold those too, don’t be messy,” Hongjoong managed to say.

Seonghwa’s eyes went wide but he stepped out of the pants and picked them up quickly. He neatly folded them and set them on top of his shirt and socks. There was only one more article of clothing standing between Hongjoong and the feast that was Seonghwa’s body completely exposed to him.

“Go ahead,” Hongjoong leaned forward in an attempt to cover his nerves.

Seonghwa didn’t move.

A few moments passed and Hongjoong did his best not to panic.

“Color?” Hongjoong finally asked.

“Green,” Seonghwa smiled.

“Then let me see you,” Hongjoong made a face and shifted in his seat.

“I’m building up to it,” Seonghwa stated as he hooked his fingers in the elastic waistband of his briefs.

“Take them off Seonghwa,” Hongjoong said with a frown.

He was left speechless when Seonghwa rolled his eyes before he turned and pulled his briefs down. Hongjoong could forgive the attitude because of the view he was given. Seonghwa was nothing but soft tan skin, and lean muscles. His ass was small, but it looked so tight, Hongjoong couldn’t wait to have it under his hand until it was red, hot, and irritated.

“Do you like what you see?” Seonghwa asked as he turned around after folding his briefs.

Hongjoong licked his lips again. Of course, Seonghwa’s cock was perfect. Hongjoong’s mouth watered thinking of how Seonghwa would fill it. He was sure he could take every single centimeter until his nose was buried in the neatly trimmed hair above Seonghwa’s cock. That wasn’t the goal of this meeting though. If everything went well, he would have Seonghwa under him soon enough, torturing the older man with pleasure.

“Of course I do,” Hongjoong answered honestly. “Back to your knees.”

“I like compliments,” Seonghwa said as he gracefully dropped back down.

There was clearly years of practice behind the motion even if it had been a long time since someone had put Seonghwa on his knees. Hongjoong couldn’t believe that Seonghwa’s ex would let such a beautiful gesture go to waste.

“And I’ll decide when you deserve them,” Hongjoong said back softly.

Seonghwa scoffed and looked to the side. Hongjoong frowned and sat up straighter. He guessed that Seonghwa would have a bratty streak, but he didn’t know it would come out right away, not when he didn’t know how far he could push. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to punish Seonghwa, but they hadn’t agreed on what that would look like yet.

“Take my cock out,” Hongjoong scrambled to say. He needed to do something that would make him feel more in control of the situation.

That seemed to refocus Seonghwa’s attention and Hongjoong swallowed roughly as Seonghwa shuffled forward until he was settled between Hongjoong’s spread legs. The command was self-explanatory, but Seonghwa wasn’t moving beyond resting both of his hands on Hongjoong’s knees.

Hongjoong wanted to grab his head and press Seonghwa’s face into his crotch. He wanted his jeans to leave a light red burn on the other man’s cheeks. How could Seonghwa be this bad their first time?

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong grumbled.

“Yes,” Seonghwa’s eyes looked up at Hongjoong.

There was a flash of defiance in Seonghwa’s look and Hongjoong desperately wanted the man who had delicately taken his shoes off in the entryway back.

“I said take my cock out,” Hongjoong frowned at him. “Be good.”

Seonghwa laughed.

A cold heat went through Hongjoong’s body, and this time he couldn’t resist. He reached out and took a handful of Seonghwa’s hair and tugged until Seonghwa’s head was pulled back exposing his neck. He watched as Seonghwa’s breathing picked up slightly, his chest falling and rising in a steady but labored rhythm.

“Be good,” Hongjoong repeated.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa answered quietly.

That was what he wanted. He let go of Seonghwa’s hair and took a moment to smooth it down before he sat back again. This time there was no hesitation from Seonghwa, his hands were at the waist of Hongjoong’s pants instantly fumbling with the button but not the zipper. Thankfully this wasn’t an area that Hongjoong felt lacking, and he his eyes locked onto Seonghwa’s face as he lifted his hips to help the other man pull his pants and briefs down in one motion.

“You’re not hard,” Seonghwa frowned.

No. Why would he be? Seonghwa was a dream for him, but Hongjoong was too stuck in his head trying to figure out what was happening to truly be aroused.

“I think you can fix that,” Hongjoong replied quickly.

Hongjoong held back a laugh as Seonghwa nodded to himself, but there was no doubt that the older man’s ego had taken a hit.

When Seonghwa’s cold fingers wrapped around Hongjoong’s cock he let out a hiss of air and did his best to keep his hips down. Hongjoong didn’t miss the way Seonghwa smiled before he dipped his head and placed a soft dry kiss to the head of Hongjoong’s cock.

Oh, this was going to be torture.

Hongjoong focused on the wall as Seonghwa took him into his mouth. He was almost dizzy with how quickly he got hard; he wasn’t even sure if he had ever been that hard before. It felt like Seonghwa’s entire tongue had managed to wrap around his shaft, and it was clear that Seonghwa was on a mission to make him cum.

There was no way that Hongjoong wasn’t going to embarrass himself.

“Slow down,” Hongjoong cautioned. “If you make me cum to quick this is going to end with a punishment.”

Seonghwa made a noise of recognition deep in his throat as he pulled off Hongjoong’s cock. There was no pause before Seonghwa’s mouth was back on him leaving wet kisses along the shaft of Hongjoong’s cock. The view was dirtier than the messiest POV porn Hongjoong had ever seen. Seonghwa was clearly enjoying himself if the hazy look in his eyes was anything to go by, and Hongjoong was happy to sit back and enjoy the attention. Even if he didn’t know how long he’d be able to hold back.

“Slow baby, slow,” Hongjoong coached.

A quiet murmured no left Seonghwa’s mouth. Hongjoong wasn’t even sure he heard it until Seonghwa’s actions suddenly had more purpose behind them. His licks were focused on the head of Hongjoong’s cock, his tongue poking into the slit chasing the taste of the precum that was leaking from it.

“I said slow Seonghwa,” Hongjoong cautioned.

Seonghwa ignored him and took Hongjoong’s cock back into his mouth fully. He pressed forward, pushing past his gag reflex, and sat there with Hongjoong’s cock filling his throat.

“No,” Hongjoong frowned and tapped Seonghwa’s cheek.

Seonghwa pulled off and licked over his spit slick lips before he dipped his head back down, “tastes good.”

Before Seonghwa could make contact with him again Hongjoong did something he never knew he had the self-control for, “red.”

Seonghwa froze with his lips grazing Hongjoong’s shaft.

“We need to stop, get dressed,” Hongjoong leaned forward and pushed at Seonghwa’s shoulder.

“But,” Seonghwa breathed out as he sat back on his heels.

“You’re not listening and it’s too all over the place,” Hongjoong frowned.

“Oh,” Seonghwa furrowed his eyebrows as he stood up stiffly and grabbed his clothes.

Hongjoong tucked his wet cock back into his pants and accepted that he’d have to be uncomfortable while they talked. Without looking back at Seonghwa he stood and made his way to sit at the kitchen table. It felt a little more neutral than the couch, and he needed to collect himself before they figured out what had just happened.

“Water?” Seonghwa asked.

“Please,” Hongjoong nodded. It would give him a few more moments to catch his breath.

Soon there was a coaster set in front of him followed by a glass of water. He picked it up and took a long sip as Seonghwa sat down. Hongjoong knew he needed to lead this conversation, but he didn’t know where to start.

“I’m sorry,” Seonghwa mumbled.

“Don’t,” Hongjoong held his hand up and shook his head. “I just didn’t know you were going to be so bratty. That didn’t even feel like a scene to me.”

Seonghwa nodded, “it’s been a while for me and I had to take charge with my ex a lot, he liked teasing.”

“I like to be listened to,” Hongjoong said back instantly. “Laughing when I tell you to be good wasn’t something I expected. If you wanted a firmer hand, you should have told me.”

Seonghwa looked down and nodded again, “I know. I’m sorry. I did like when you grabbed my hair though, I like rough.”

Hongjoong nodded, “I could tell by your checklist, but I don’t know you yet. This was supposed to be an easy way to get into things and see if we would work.”

“I know,” Seonghwa’s eyes stayed locked on the floor.

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong breathed out. “I’m not mad at you. I’m just trying to figure out what happened between you taking my shoes off and you laughing at me.”

“Nothing,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I just went back to playing the part I did with my ex.”

Hongjoong nodded and took another sip of his water.

“I wasn’t perfect either,” Hongjoong admitted. “I could have pushed more and trusted you to safe word if you needed to. It was clear you wanted a firmer hand, and I was scared to give that to you.”

“I can take a lot,” Seonghwa admitted quietly.

"It’s been a long time since you have though,” Hongjoong pointed out. “I need to be able to balance your wants and needs and keeping you safe.”

He was surprised at the soft way that Seonghwa smiled at him, “that’s why I don’t care that you’re a novice by the way.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help the way he dipped his head as his cheeks got hot, “I didn’t think we were doing something that intense the first time around.”

“We weren’t supposed to,” Seonghwa admitted.

“Also, I’m not a huge fan of funishments,” Hongjoong added. “If you want rough or impact play it can be built into the scene. My punishments aren’t fun and pushing me won’t get you spanked.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa nodded. “That’s good to know. I like that.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “I’m sorry I couldn’t get control.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t let you,” Seonghwa said as his fingers started to idly play with the condensed water on the outside of his glass.

“It’s okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “At least we know now.”

Seonghwa smiled slightly, “you can’t punish me for being too good at blow jobs by the way.”

Hongjoong laughed a little. “I was struggling, and you weren’t listening. Plus, I can punish you for anything I want.”

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa laughed. “You can’t.”

“Your mouth and tongue were just a lot for me,” Hongjoong shrugged. “It’s been a while since I’ve hooked up with anyone.”

“Let me blow you then,” Seonghwa looked at him seriously. “If you cum quickly you don’t have to be embarrassed. Maybe next time just jerk off before our scene or something?”

“You’re going to let me try again?” Hongjoong looked at him surprised.

“Of course I am,” Seonghwa gave him a reassuring smile. “We both messed up and we both can do better.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded.

“Is that you consenting to your cock in my mouth?” Seonghwa slid out of his chair until his knees hit the floor.

“Yes,” Hongjoong answered firmly.

This time his cock was already hard when Seonghwa managed to fish it out of his pants.

“You tasted so good,” Seonghwa commented. “Someday will you let me play with it for as long as I want to? Till you cum more than once?”

“That’s something you want?” Hongjoong breathed out.

“Yeah,” Seonghwa nodded. “You’re just big enough for it to be uncomfortable for me and I like that.”

Hongjoong made a small noise in the back of his throat. This was fine, there was no formal dynamic here. Seonghwa was just stating his wants while he casually stroked Hongjoong’s cock.

“Don’t hold back okay,” Seonghwa continued to work his hand on Hongjoong’s shaft twisting his wrist each time the end of his fingers hit the head of Hongjoong’s cock.

“But,” Hongjoong breathed out.

“It’s flattering,” Seonghwa bend his head and lapped up the bead of precum that was threatening to spill down the side of Hongjoong’s shaft.

This time when Seonghwa’s lips closed around his cock Hongjoong didn’t have a thought in his head. His only focus was the wet heat around him and the way Seonghwa somehow knew exactly how hard to suck. It was clear that Seonghwa was putting in his full effort and Hongjoong couldn’t find it in himself to hold back when Seonghwa’s fingers grazed over his balls. He felt his body tighten, Seonghwa’s only warning, before he let go and released into Seonghwa’s mouth.

Not a drop was missed and Seonghwa stayed on his cock until Hongjoong couldn’t take it anymore. He pushed at Seonghwa’s shoulder and was happy to see a calm, sated, look on the other man’s face.

“I like,” Hongjoong took a few breaths. “Show me next time before you swallow.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa smiled up at him before he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Can I get you off?” Hongjoong questioned as Seonghwa stood up.

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head before he reached for the glass of water.

Hongjoong tucked himself back into his pants as he watched Seonghwa’s neck bob as he swallowed. Everything about the man was so elegant and beautiful that Hongjoong couldn’t help the little thrill at the thought of ruining some of that grace.

“You don’t need to punish yourself,” Hongjoong commented as he stood.

“I won’t,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I promise.”'

“Next time I want to make you cum,” Hongjoong admitted. “I bet you look beautiful.”

“Don’t say things like that,” Seonghwa said with a smile.

“I thought you liked compliments,” Hongjoong teased.

Seonghwa shoved him playfully, “don’t be like that.”

Hongjoong laughed and grabbed Seonghwa’s wrist to pull him in for a hug, “this is good, you feel okay with me leaving right now? You don’t need anything else?”

“I’m good,” Seonghwa nodded against his shoulder. “Thank you for checking in. Let me get your backpack.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded and shuffled to the entryway.

He couldn’t believe he had completed his first scene. It was a mess, and it hadn’t gone well but the after had been worth it. He now felt more confident in the direction that they were going to move in. Seonghwa was going to work on being more well behaved and Hongjoong was going to push more. Despite his lack of experience, they both might have just been a little beyond a simple scene.

When Seonghwa appeared again he set Hongjoong’s backpack on the floor before he knelt next to it and reached for Hongjoong’s shoes.

“Seonghwa, you don’t have to,” Hongjoong smiled down at him.

“I know I just like to,” Seonghwa answered.

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “You like to be on your knees, don’t you?”

“I do,” Seonghwa answered quietly. “And I like serving.”

“I noticed,” Hongjoong answered. “I’m very into that. It’s an unexpected bonus.”

“It’s not too much?” Seonghwa looked up at him.

“Not at all,” Hongjoong reached out and let two of his fingers trail down Seonghwa’s cheek. “I don’t think anything about you is too much, I just need to be ready for the brat to come out next time.”

Seonghwa let out a breathy laugh, “I’ll reign it in a little.”

“More than a little,” Hongjoong punctuated the statement with a laugh.

“You don’t know it yet, but I think you’ll like the challenge,” Seonghwa nodded firmly to himself.

“If it’s you I’ll like it,” Hongjoong admitted.

Seonghwa stood back up again once Hongjoong’s shoes were on, “I’ll see you next week?”

“You’ll see me next week,” Hongjoong nodded at him.

It felt awkward, like they both wanted more time together, but Hongjoong knew he needed to leave. This wasn’t a date. They could be friends but what they were doing was still transactional. Seonghwa was getting off and having fun, and Hongjoong was learning. That didn’t have to impact the respect they had for each other, but it did mean that he had to be careful not to blur any lines too much. Seonghwa was a successful older man who was looking for his next husband and that man wasn’t going to be Hongjoong. He was fine with being a phase he just hoped they could keep the friendship they were growing.

“Will you let me know when you get home?” Seonghwa asked.

“What?” Hongjoong asked as he slung his bag over his shoulder.

“Text me when you get home, so I know,” Seonghwa elaborated. “So, I don’t worry.”

“You don’t need to worry about me,” Hongjoong laughed.

“But I will,” Seonghwa frowned. “Just text me."

“Okay okay,” Hongjoong laughed, his hand on the doorknob. “I’ll text you.”

“Thank you,” Seonghwa shook his head with a smile. “Have a good night.”

“You too,” he cracked the door open. “And remember not to punish yourself.”

Hongjoong laughed as he slipped out of the door and down the hallway.

Chapter Text

“Why are you awake and working this early on a Saturday?” Mingi’s voice cut through the silence of the early morning.

Hongjoong startled at the sudden interruption. His arm jerked awkwardly, and he ended up decapitating the mouse shape that he was cutting out.

“What the fuck?” Hongjoong glared at him and held up the mouse’s head with a frown. “Can you be louder next time?”

“I’m not going to wake up Yunho just so I don’t scare you,” Mingi shook his head. “What are you doing?”

“It’s for a project for the kids,” Hongjoong shrugged as he looked over the mess of colorful paper and animal shapes that he had been diligently tracing and cutting out for the last two hours.

“A hot guy gets you off once and now you’re up early on a Saturday working? Is he magical?” Mingi laughed before he headed into the kitchen.

“Last night was actually kind of terrible,” Hongjoong called after Mingi as he crumpled up the ruined mouse. “Do you want to help trace animals?”

“No,” Mingi answered flatly. “And what do you mean it was terrible? You came home and floated into your room last night.”

“He’s really hot,” Hongjoong smiled to himself as he picked up a bright blue piece of paper and started to cut out a shape of a dog that he had already traced. “That helped a lot.”

“Then how was it terrible?” Mingi asked from the kitchen.

Hongjoong paused and looked up at Mingi. He never knew exactly how much of himself that he should share with his vanilla friends. It wasn’t that he was ashamed to be into kink; it was that they didn’t need to know every single detail of his sex life. There were things that they’d never understand anyway.

He wanted to keep some things between him and Seonghwa anyway. Their agreement was new and exciting and Hongjoong wanted to hold it as close to his chest as possible for as long as he could.

“The scene was a mess, but we stopped and talked about it,” Hongjoong answered simply before his focus went back to the dog he was cutting out. “Next time should be better.”

“But you got off?” Mingi asked as he appeared in the living room with two cups of coffee.

“I did,” Hongjoong fought his smile. “He’s, you know, it would have been hard not to.”

Mingi laughed before he sat down on the floor next to Hongjoong, “so what are we doing here?”

“Animal shapes,” Hongjoong stated simply. “Yeosang is doing the other part. It’s this whole weeklong unit that we’re starting on Monday. I just need to trace and cut out as many animals as I have paper for.”

“Okay,” Mingi nodded and reached for a yellow sheet of paper and a white form of a bear to trace. “Do you have more scissors?”

“Here,” Hongjoong handed over his spare pair with a smile.

“You can talk about the thing with Seonghwa more if you want,” Mingi offered. “I know we tease you, but I don’t think that any of that stuff is weird or anything.”

Hongjoong paused and looked at Mingi seriously, “oh. Thanks. I’m good though. I just hope I do a better job next time.”

“I’m sure you were fine,” Mingi shrugged. “You two just have growing pains or whatever. You are still strangers, and the level of trust and intimacy you need to do the things you want has to be worked up to.”

Hongjoong nodded, “you’re right.”

“Are you going to take it slower next time?” Mingi asked.

“Um,” Hongjoong frowned at himself. “I have no idea.”

“You should figure that out,” Mingi commented with a dry laugh.

Hongjoong nodded, “you’re right. I just kind of left though. We didn’t really figure out what we’re going to do next."

"So, you’re both idiots?” Mingi smiled.

“Just me,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I’m the only stupid one.”

Hongjoong knew he needed to be better at guiding them, but he couldn’t worry about that right now. His current focus was finishing his project so he could enjoy his day off on Sunday.

Finishing the project got easier when Yunho woke up and joined them. He spent his time tracing the animals while Hongjoong and Mingi cut them out.

They had a late lunch after cleaning up the leftover scraps of paper, and the thoughts of Seonghwa started to creep back into Hongjoong’s brain. To plan for the next scene, he needed Seonghwa’s input, and Hongjoong wasn’t completely comfortable with the idea of just calling the other man randomly on a Saturday in the middle of the day.

So, hours later, Hongjoong found himself pacing around his room with his phone clutched in a sweaty hand.

He needed to call Seonghwa.

It was five rings, nearly to voicemail, before the sound on the other line changed and Hongjoong’s heart stopped.

“Hello?”

“Hi, it’s Hongjoong,” Hongjoong spit out quickly.

“Oh, hi!”

There was some shuffling on the line and Hongjoong swore he could hear children’s music playing.

“Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, nothing serious,” Hongjoong rubbed is hand over his face. “I just realized we agreed to meet again, but we didn’t plan out anything. When did you want to do that?”

“Right.”

Hongjoong listened as Seonghwa let out a long sigh.

“You don’t need to have a solution right now,” Hongjoong corrected. “We just need some time to talk. So things can be better next time.”

“I know, don’t panic, you sound nervous.”

Hongjoong smiled when Seonghwa laughed into the phone, “I am nervous. I didn’t want to call you randomly.”

“It’s just me don’t be nervous.”

That was exactly why Hongjoong was nervous. He didn’t want to do anything too sudden or too much that would Seonghwa away.

“Okay so maybe we can meet on Wednesdays? It can be at my office after school ends if that works for you. I can put a reoccurring meeting on my calendar to block out time for you.”

“You’d do that?” Hongjoong said in disbelief.

“Of course. We won’t be able to plan well after a scene. Plus, Wednesday gives you some time to get any equipment we might need when we meet up on Friday.”

“Wednesday is good,” Hongjoong nodded to himself.

“Okay I’ll text you the address, floor and suit number. We can meet at four?”

“Four thirty,” Hongjoong corrected. “I can’t teleport.”

He was rewarded with another laugh from Seonghwa.

“Hey, um…” Hongjoong trailed off.

“Yeah?”

“Did you?” Hongjoong made a face at himself. “Did you get off last night?”

Hongjoong was answered with a surprised gasp before Seonghwa spoke.

“I did, but I can’t really talk about the details right now.”

“That’s okay,” Hongjoong said in a softer tone. “I just wanted to make sure. Maybe next time you can show me?”

“Show you?”

“A picture of after,” Hongjoong started. “Or during, or whatever you’re comfortable with. No face obviously.”

“So, if I do that tonight you’d want to know,” a pause. “You want to see it?”

“Yes,” Hongjoong answered firmly. “I want to know when you get off Seonghwa, and someday I want to be in control of when that happens.”

This time Seonghwa’s laugh was strained around the edges.

“I like everything you’re saying, but it’s not a good time. I’m babysitting.”

“Oh yeah,” Hongjoong groaned. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay. I’ll show you, but I have to go. I’ll see you on Wednesday?”

“Wednesday.”

“Bye Joongie.”

“Bye Seonghwa.”

Hongjoong hung up the phone and threw it on the bed before he put his face in his hands. Why had he ended the call like that? Could he not just be normal for a few minutes?

Thankfully Seonghwa sent the address of his work building within a half hour of their conversation ending which made Hongjoong’s anxiety lessen just enough that he could fall asleep.

Sunday morning Hongjoong woke up to a text message from Seonghwa. The time stamp was around two a.m. and there was no text. It was just one simple picture. Seonghwa’s delicate long fingers were cupped together and there, splattered across his palm, was a pool of cum. Hongjoong’s stomach clenched, and he couldn’t help the way his cock started to fill.

He didn’t get out of bed until his cum was splattered across his hand and abdomen.

**

“Can you help me get all the chairs up?” Hongjoong asked as he moved around the classroom.

The children were already gone for the day, but he was dangerously close to the time he needed to leave to see Seonghwa. A parent had gotten held up in traffic, which was unavoidable, but it was the worst day for it to have happened.

“You know, now that your sex life is successful, I don’t get to hear about it anymore,” Yeosang said as he lifted the first chair.

Hongjoong froze with a chair in his hands midair. He turned to look at Yeosang and frowned, “what?”

“I find you a guy, which you’re welcome for by the way, and then you stop talking to me about dating,” Yeosang said with a passive look on his face.

Hongjoong dramatically rolled his eyes before he finished setting the chair on top of the table in front of him.

“You haven't said one word about Seonghwa all week,” Yeosang continued. “It was either very good or very bad.”

“It was both,” Hongjoong grumbled. “I’m going to see him today when we’re done cleaning up to plan out something for Friday.”

“You can talk about your scenes with me. I get all that stuff,” Yeosang waved his hand. “Even if I’m not formal about it.”

Hongjoong groaned. First Mingi had asked him to talk over the weekend and now Yeosang was pushing. He hadn’t realized how much he had complained about all his failed dates and his lack of a sex life.

“There’s not a lot to talk about?” Hongjoong shrugged. “I’m not going to talk about the details of being intimate with Seonghwa he might not be comfortable with that.”

“Oh,” Yeosang’s eyebrows went up. “It’s like that.”

“It’s not like anything,” Hongjoong grumbled. “I’m being respectful. Plus, he’s going to be dating the whole time anyway. What we’re doing isn’t serious.”

“He’s what?” Yeosang froze.

“He’s dating?” Hongjoong looked at him and shrugged. “It’s not a big deal we set up some guidelines. I just hope he has the same luck that I did so we can keep things going for a while.”

“Hongjoong,” Yeosang said slowly and carefully.

“Don’t use that tone,” Hongjoong held up a hand. “I know what I’m doing.”

“You’re possessive,” Yeosang said flatly. “Not in a toxic way, but in a way that I don’t think you can be physical with someone and not have that be exclusive.”

“The physical part is exclusive,” Hongjoong corrected. “He’s just looking for the father of his future kids or whatever. When he finds someone that he wants to get more serious with we’re going to stop what we’re doing. It’s not a big deal.”

“Right, okay,” Yeosang nodded. “Well, I’ll be here for you when it does turn into a big deal.”

Hongjoong laughed. He didn’t think the arrangement that he had with Seonghwa would escalate into a big deal. Sure, the other man was fun to be around, and he was incredibly attractive, but that was it. They didn’t have a deeper romantic connection, and they had no reason to build one.

“Can I head out?” Hongjoong sighed.

He didn’t need to be early, but Hongjoong did want to escape the current conversation. If he let himself think about Seonghwa as a romantic option, he wasn’t going to stop. Hongjoong had already mentally put up a boundary and it needed to stay firmly in place. Hongjoong couldn’t spend his time daydreaming about future possibilities that couldn’t happen. Seonghwa was older, and he wanted to start the next phase of his life. Hongjoong wasn’t even sure if he was going to change is career path in the next year or not.

It wouldn’t work out between them.

“Sure,” Yeosang nodded. “There isn’t much left to do anyway.”

“Thanks,” Hongjoong held up his hand and scrambled to grab his bag and his backpack. “See you in the morning.”

Hongjoong wasted no time getting out of the school and to the nearest subway station. Seonghwa’s office was only fifteen-minute ride, and a quick walk away from the school. He knew the area well enough to know which building Seonghwa was in without much direction because one of his favorite coffee shops was hidden behind the row of large office buildings that sat against the street.

Without much thought Hongjoong turned towards the coffee shop. He had a few spare minutes and figured bringing Seonghwa something to drink wouldn’t hurt anything. The issue was that he didn’t know what Seonghwa liked. In the end Hongjoong took a chance on a sweet pistachio latte that was their flavor of the month, and a matching pastry.

Seonghwa’s building was intimidating, but Hongjoong had navigated worse for some of his working trainings and certifications. He double checked the floor on his phone and looked at the directory displayed on the bright LED screen near the elevators. It was obvious that Seonghwa had a good job, but Hongjoong wasn’t expecting him to work for one of the biggest beauty brands in the country.

His nerves had built back up by the time the elevator doors opened. Hongjoong had also realized that he looked like a mess when he caught his reflection in the metal doors. His backpack was dangerously low on his back, and his shoulder bag was bulging with projects that the kids had worked on that day. Both of his hands were occupied with the coffees that he was holding, and the small bag that contained Seonghwa’s pastry. Hongjoong really needed to learn to be more effortless, or at the very least more organized.

“Can I help you?”

Hongjoong looked up to see a man, that was likely a little younger than him, standing behind a tall desk looking at him amused.

“I have a meeting with Park Seonghwa?” Hongjoong said in an unsure tone.

“Are you sure about that?” The man teased him.

Hongjoong frowned then nodded, “yes.”

“Is he aware of your meeting?” the man pressed.

“He set the meeting,” Hongjoong said. This time his tone was a little more annoyed when he spoke.

The man laughed, “what was your name? I’ll call and see if he’s ready for you.”

“Kim Hongjoong,” the frown stayed on Hongjoong’s face.

“Hello Sir,” the man started. “There’s a Kim Hongjoong here for a meeting with you. Should I escort him?”

Hongjoong watched the exchange silently and felt his annoyance grow a when the man went right to typing something into his computer after he hung up the phone.

“Well?” Hongjoong grumbled.

“Patience,” the man answered.

Hongjoong narrowed his eyes and looked for some indication of the stranger’s name on his desk so that he could properly complain to Seonghwa about how rude the other man had been. Maybe it was something about the culture at big companies to look down on people who didn’t seem like they belonged there.

“Okay follow me,” the man finally said as he came out from around his desk.

Hongjoong followed him down a hallway, past a few other offices, and rows of cubicles. No one paid him any attention, which was fine. He didn’t want Seonghwa to feel like he had to explain Hongjoong’s presence.

Once they were at the end of the hallway the man knocked on a large wooden door twice before he opened it up.

“Jongho,” Seonghwa laughed. “You could have helped him.”

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa stood up with a smile.

“He seemed fine,” Jongho shrugged.

“It’s pistachio,” Hongjoong added in lamely as he held up the coffee. “And a pastry.”

“Thank you Hongjoong,” Seonghwa smiled brightly as he took the bag and cup from Hongjoong’s hand.

Hongjoong didn’t miss the way Jongho rolled his eyes.

“Jongho, Hongjoong will be here weekly for a while,” Seonghwa started. “Please try to be kind to him.”

“I was just making sure he wasn’t some creep,” Jongho said as he eyed Hongjoong. “He doesn’t look like your type.”

Seonghwa flustered slightly, “this isn’t like that, he doesn’t need to be my type. Just be kind and expect him next week.”

“Fine,” Jongho grumbled.

Hongjoong silently watched the exchange and wondered how often Seonghwa met men in his office. He wanted to know what had gone wrong in the past to cause Jongho to be so distrusting. It wasn’t Hongjoong’s place, but he was more than willing to confront any men that made Seonghwa feel uncomfortable. He was also going to ignore the fact that he wasn’t Seonghwa’s type. It was already clear that Hongjoong wasn’t Seonghwa’s type when it came to a husband, but that didn’t matter. He was obviously Seonghwa’s type when it came to a Dominant.

“Don’t mind Jongho,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Thank you for the coffee and the pastry.”

“It’s from my favorite cafe. It’s behind all the buildings,” Hongjoong made eye contact with Jongho as he left the room.

The office wasn’t completely private, the back wall was all windows that looked out onto the street, and the front wall was all glass aside from the door. Seonghwa, or someone, had set up long blinds that were currently closed giving them just enough cover from any prying eyes.

“You went to Two Foot?” Seonghwa asked.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded twice. “I just picked what I thought you might like.”

“You picked my favorite,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I always just get their monthly special, but the pistachio is so good.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help his smile. Even if they weren’t romantic, he wanted to take care of his submissive and spoil the other man as much as he could manage.

“You can set your things down,” Seonghwa gestured to a table and chair in the far corner of the room.

“Thank you,” Hongjoong gave him a little awkward bow before he turned to set his bags down.

“What’s all that?” Seonghwa gestured to Hongjoong’s bag as he spoke.

“Projects that the kids completed today. I have to grade them,” Hongjoong answered simply.

“They’re children what are you grading?” Seonghwa asked with a laugh as he settled back behind his desk.

"It’s more than grading. I need to go through and make sure everyone is where they should be and developing correctly. Then, if they aren’t, I need to figure out how to help any of the kids that are a little behind. Sometimes we need to involve the parents as well. It’s very important to grade them.” Hongjoong answered.

“Oh,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I didn’t even think about that.”

Hongjoong nodded, “with teaching kids this young it’s all about making sure they have strong foundations and are building basic skills.”

“That makes sense,” Seonghwa commented. “I never really thought about it though. My friend’s kids are still babies. They just started walking. I guess I never really thought about how they’re learning to do everything for the first time.”

“Exactly,” Hongjoong sat down. “And they all learn differently.”

There was a quick awkward silence as Hongjoong took a sip of his drink to delay the start of their conversation.

“How would you like to do this?” Seonghwa asked quietly. “The door locks, but for obvious reasons I’m not comfortable doing anything sexual in here.”

“I’ll scratch that fantasy off the list then,” Hongjoong smirked.

“All men are the same,” Seonghwa grumbled. “Everyone wants me bent over a desk.”

“It’s a good mental visual,” Hongjoong laughed.

Seonghwa made a face before he reached for his coffee.

“I think this is weird,” Hongjoong gestured between them. “I’d rather you on your knees by me. We can talk freely, but I think we should have a dynamic for these kinds of conversations.”

“Okay.”

Seonghwa stood and moved slowly to stand next to Hongjoong’s chair. Without a word Hongjoong shifted the chair so that he was facing the left rather than the desk. When Hongjoong was done moving Seonghwa dropped to his knees and shifted to get used to the feeling. Hongjoong couldn’t help but reach out to cup Seonghwa’s cheek and lift his head up until they were making eye contact. His breath caught in his throat at the pure beauty of Seonghwa’s easy submission.

“I think the next scene should still be basic, but maybe more detailed,” Hongjoong started. “We need to introduce more of what you’re into, so you have more of an incentive to be good for me.”

Seonghwa nodded against Hongjoong’s hand.

“I’d like you to be wearing some pretty lingerie for me too, is that okay?” Hongjoong asked quietly, more to set the tone than preserve their privacy.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa answered.

“I also want to introduce impact play. Nothing crazy just a hand spanking, maybe over the knee. I haven’t decided yet,” Hongjoong dropped his hand and brought it to rest on his thigh.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve been spanked,” Seonghwa breathed out.

“Then we have to get you used to it again, don’t we?” Hongjoong smiled brightly.

“We do,” Seonghwa nodded sharply.

“I also want to include some cock slapping, and fingering,” Hongjoong added. “I’ll get you off if you deserve it. Does that sound good?”

“What about you?” Seonghwa asked.

Hongjoong clicked his tongue, “you answer my questions first.”

Seonghwa visibly flustered and he looked down briefly before he looked back up, “sorry Sir. Yes, that sounds good, but what about you?”

“We’ll see,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I haven’t thought about me, maybe I’ll use your throat.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa breathed out.

“You don’t like that?” Hongjoong questioned.

“No, I do,” Seonghwa nodded. “I like rough.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile, “you’re very pretty like this Seonghwa.”

“Don’t,” Seonghwa looked down again and this time when he looked back up his cheeks were stained a pretty shade of pink.

“Oh, now you don’t want compliments,” Hongjoong teased.

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I want them Sir. It’s just,” Seonghwa moved his hands from where they were behind his back to gesture around the room.

“You know I could reach my foot out right now and put it on your pretty cock,” Hongjoong paused to gauge Seonghwa’s reaction before he continued. “I bet you could get off rutting up against my shoe.”

Seonghwa inhaled sharply.

“But we can’t do anything sexual in here,” Hongjoong finished. “Maybe we’ll save that for another time.”

“That’s not fair,” Seonghwa pouted.

“It doesn’t have to be fair darling,” Hongjoong reached his hand out again. This time he just wanted to feel Seonghwa’s hot cheek against his fingertips.

“So, I have,” Seonghwa made a face at himself. “I have a friend for you.”

“What?” Hongjoong pulled his hand back and shifted his whole body back further into the chair. They had just started and Seonghwa was already going to pass him off to someone else?

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head and waved his hands. “Not like that. He’s a Dom. I thought you’d want to talk to him about stuff. Like a mentor?”

“What?” Hongjoong asked again.

His head was spinning.

“My friend Wooyoung,” Seonghwa answered. “He and his husband are very into all sorts of kink, and he’s been involved in the community off and on for a while. They’re not active now because of the whole having kids thing, but they still do formal scenes and stuff. It might be good for you.”

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong shook his head.

“Is that over stepping? If it is we can forget I said anything,” Seonghwa shifted again nervously.

“It’s something I’ve wanted for a long time,” Hongjoong commented honestly. “I just need to make sure that it won’t be weird for Yeosang first.”

Seonghwa nodded, “I can give you Wooyoung’s number before you leave.”

“Thank you,” Hongjoong smiled. “I mean it.”

“Wooyoung also knows me very well, so that’ll help too,” Seonghwa shrugged.

Hongjoong wanted to ask how well Wooyoung knew him but that was crossing some invisible line.

“Thank you Seonghwa,” Hongjoong smiled.

“You already said that,” Seonghwa smiled back at him. “Sir.”

“Don’t use Sir sarcastically,” Hongjoong reached out and tapped the top of Seonghwa’s head.

Seonghwa curled in on himself slightly, “sorry Sir.”

“And we should talk about that picture you sent me,” Hongjoong commented.

“Was it not good?” Seonghwa asked.

“It was perfect,” Hongjoong smiled. “I’m not ready to completely control when you cum yet, so keep showing me. You can be as creative as you want.”

“I’m okay with doing that when you’re ready,” Seonghwa nodded. “But I’ll keep taking pictures for now.”

“Good boy,” Hongjoong breathed out. “I think we’ve gone over everything. You can stand up.”

Seonghwa pouted, and Hongjoong laughed lightly.

“Up,” Hongjoong poked his foot against Seonghwa’s thigh. “We can’t do more, you’re at work. Remember?”

Seonghwa stood with a sigh and bent to wipe off his knees, “for the record you could have pushed me into that whole humping your foot thing.”

“Too bad I respect your limits,” Hongjoong shrugged.

“Too bad,” Seonghwa echoed.

Hongjoong let out a laugh, “I can tell that you’re used to getting your way.”

“Well,” Seonghwa gestured around his office. “I’m the boss here, and with my ex I did normally get my way.”

“It’ll be fun to tell you no,” Hongjoong couldn’t stop smiling as Seonghwa’s lips turned down into a pout.

“I don’t like how well you can read me,” Seonghwa grumbled as he picked up his phone. “It’s not fair.”

“I think you’ll be fine,” Hongjoong laughed.

“I’m going to text you Wooyoung’s number,” Seonghwa cleared his throat. “I kind of told him you might message him.”

“Kind of?” Hongjoong shifted the chair back to face the desk.

“I mentioned him talking to you when I handed over their kids last weekend,” Seonghwa grinned. “He said it was fine.”

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong sighed. “Is this crossing a boundary?”

“No not at all,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Wooyoung will love getting to impart all his wisdom on a young Dom, and it gives him space to brag about San and that’s like more than half of his personality. They’re disgustingly, and loudly in love. They made me feel single even when I was still married. Just a warning.”

“I live with a couple,” Hongjoong laughed. “They’re not that bad, but they look at each other in this way I can’t even describe.”

“Doesn’t that make you feel lonely?” Seonghwa asked as he looked over at his computer.

“Sometimes,” Hongjoong answered. “I’m happy for them though, and they don’t ever do anything to exclude me.”

Seonghwa nodded, “I get that. It was hard to see my friend’s marriage get better while mine got worse, but seeing how they are with each other was how I knew I needed to end things.”

Hongjoong nodded, “I get that.”

“Anyway,” Seonghwa set his phone down. “I sent you his number, and I’ll see you Friday night?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong moved to grab his bags before he returned to the desk for his coffee. “Pick out something pretty to wear.”

“I will,” Seonghwa smiled. “Maybe I’ll show you my collection someday.”

“Maybe I’ll add to it,” Hongjoong commented without thinking.

“You don’t need to buy me gifts Hongjoong,” Seonghwa answered seriously.

“I know,” Hongjoong shrugged. “But gift giving and acts of service go both ways.”

“Just don’t spoil me,” Seonghwa laughed. “If you do that, the guys I’m dating won’t stand a chance.”

Hongjoong nodded but didn’t reply. He wasn’t entirely sure how he felt about that statement. He didn’t want to blur any of the lines that they were establishing, but he did want to keep spoiling Seonghwa.

“I’ll see you on Friday,” Hongjoong gave him a wave.

“See you Friday,” Seonghwa chirped back.

Hongjoong let out a breath after he shut the office door behind him. He paused briefly to adjust his bags before he made his way back down the hallway. When he got to Jongho’s desk he paused briefly to debate if he should stop and say something or not.

“Good meeting?” Jongho questioned with a smile.

“It wasn’t like that,” Hongjoong shot back despite the fact that it was very likely exactly what Jongho assumed it was.

“Okay sure,” Jongho nodded. “Have a good afternoon Hongjoong. I guess we’ll see each other next week.”

“We will,” Hongjoong answered before he scrambled to the elevators.

He could hear Jongho laugh at him as the doors slowly shut. Next week he’d have to try to win over the younger man. It wasn’t that he felt like everyone had to like him, but Hongjoong suspected Jongho was at least a little important to Seonghwa. He felt like he needed to win Jongho over even if Hongjoong knew he’d just be passing through the office and Seonghwa’s life for a short time.

Right now, he couldn’t worry too much about Jongho. Hongjoong had to figure out a way to ask Yeosang if he was okay with him contacting Wooyoung. The prospect of having a mentor couldn’t override his ability to be a good friend.

Yeosang had picked up the phone by the time Hongjoong walked off the elevator and into the lobby.

“Hi.”

“Can I meet Wooyoung?” Hongjoong blurted out.

“What?”

“Seonghwa suggested that I could talk to him about stuff. I wouldn’t talk about you, but I think talking to him could be good for me and help me learn what I’m doing and how to do it better.” Hongjoong rambled out. “I just wanted to make sure you’d be comfortable with that.”

He was answered with Yeosang’s laughter.

“That’s fine. I don’t care.”

“Okay cool,” Hongjoong said quickly. “Are you sure?”

“I don’t own them.”

“I know, but I want to make sure you’re comfortable,” Hongjoong stressed.

“Hongjoong I’m comfortable, I consent. Are there any other magic words you need to hear?”

Hongjoong let out a dry laugh, “that covers it.”

“I’m about to walk into the gym I can’t really talk right now. Did you need anything else?”

“No,” Hongjoong laughed. “Have a good workout or whatever, get swole.”

The phone line went dead and Hongjoong laughed as he checked the screen to make sure Yeosang had hung up on him.

The next thing he did was add Wooyoung to his contacts with nervous fingers. Hongjoong had wanted a mentor for years and never found anyone that he meshed with well enough for that to happen. There was just some advice that only someone with practical experience could give him, but he knew not to get his hopes up too high. Just because Wooyoung knew Seonghwa and Yeosang didn’t mean that he was someone who Hongjoong would get along with. They could have completely different approaches, but he needed to try anyway.

Hongjoong

Hi it’s Hongjoong. Seonghwa said I could message you.

He was shocked when his phone immediately vibrated in his hand with a reply.

Wooyoung

Hi! He told me. Did you want to meet up?

Hongjoong could feel his heart beating faster.

Hongjoong

I’d love that

He regretted his reply as soon as he sent it.

Wooyoung

Tmrow okay?

Hongjoong

Sure

Wooyoung

Ok dinner tmrow @5

The text was followed by another one with Wooyoung’s address. It was on the edge of the city but still easily accessible by train.

It didn’t hit Hongjoong that he had agreed to dinner with a stranger and likely that stranger’s family until he was walking through his front door. A wave of nausea hit him and Hongjoong swore he turned green when he looked up to see Yeosang sitting on the couch in his living room.

“I changed my mind,” Yeosang deadpanned.

Hongjoong froze.

“Don’t fuck with him,” Yunho’s voice chimed in. “You know he’ll internalize it and not meet that guy.”

“You’re right,” Yeosang nodded. “It’s okay Hongjoong I really don’t care. They’re just my friends. You can be friends with them too.”

“Not that kind of friend,” Hongjoong mumbled.

“They’re hot,” Yeosang added. “Maybe you’ll want to be that kind of friend with them.”

Hongjoong made a face.

“He’s already focused on one guy,” Yunho commented. “You know he can’t split his attention like that.”

“True,” Yeosang shrugged. “Did you already message Wooyoung?”

“We’re meeting up tomorrow,” Hongjoong breathed out as he finally took his shoes off. “He asked me to come over for dinner.”

“Oh,” Yeosang made a face but recovered. “That’ll be nice.”

Yunho seemed to also notice the face, and he quickly changed the topic, “we are going to game. Are you in?”

Hongjoong shook his head no, “I have to grade.”

“One of us should work,” Yeosang laughed.

“Okay, we’ll let you know when Mingi is back with the food,” Yunho nodded.

“Cool,” Hongjoong answered.

He shuffled to his bedroom and shut the door with a loud sigh. He had no idea how he was supposed to focus on grading.

**

Navigating to Wooyoung’s house was a little harder than Hongjoong had anticipated. They were still in the city so he could get there easily by train, but their home was at the end of a few narrow alley ways, some of which were nearly vertical climbs. Hongjoong didn’t think of himself as out of shape, but he did second guess if he needed a mentor when he was forced to go up a large set of stone stairs. They saved him from yet another hill, but his thighs were burning by the time he reached the top. Thankfully he was only a few more steps away from Wooyoung and San’s home. It was a modest size, tucked away on its own hill, and surrounded by small trees and bushes.

Hongjoong couldn’t help but wonder if a home like that was in his future or if he’d aways be living in an apartment. He hadn’t ever put much thought into the future, but someday Mingi and Yunho would need their own space and he’d be on his own. Hopefully he’d have the money for a house when that happened, maybe he’d even have his own partner by then.

Somehow, Hongjoong wasn’t nervous as he knocked on the front door. It was only a few seconds between his first knock and the door swinging open. Hongjoong’s eyes went wide before he collected himself. It was San in front of him, holding a baby girl who had a fist full of his hair.

“Hi Hongjoong,” San bowed as much as he could while holding the child and stepped to the side.

“Hi,” Hongjoong mumbled as he walked into the house.

The sounds of bright children’s music hit Hongjoong’s ears, and he took in the toys scattered across the living room as he slipped his shoes off. For some reason he hadn’t expected the home to be so domestic and lived in, but it was already so clearly full of love that it made his heart ache.

“Youngie is finishing up dinner,” San explained as he set the little girl down. “Sorry about the mess.”

“Oh, don’t worry about it,” Hongjoong shook his head. “My classroom looks worse than this at the end of every day.”

“Oh yeah you teach,” San’s eyes went a little wide as he nodded. “Seonghwa mentioned that.”

“I co-teach with Yeosang,” Hongjoong clarified.

It was better to mention Yeosang now and get it out of the way.

“Right yeah,” San gestured to the couch. “You can sit down. Want a drink or something?”

“Sure,” Hongjoong nodded as he plopped down.

“Can you keep an eye on them for a second?” San pointed between the twin girls who were playing with a kitchen set.

“Do they have names?” Hongjoong asked with a smile.

“Oh,” San laughed at himself. “The one in green is Seoha and the one in blue is Isol.”

“Cute,” Hongjoong smiled.

San nodded and disappeared through a doorway into what Hongjoong assumed was the kitchen. Immediately he understood why Yeosang was casually hooking up with the couple. He hadn’t seen Wooyoung yet, but San was enough. He was classically handsome, and just glamorous enough that he assumed San had to be in the entertainment industry in some aspect.

“Is Milkis okay? We’re not always fancy around here,” San said as he appeared again this time holding a can.

“Strawberry is my favorite,” Hongjoong commented taking the can.

“Seonghwa’s too,” San commented as he sat next to Hongjoong. “The girls just started walking confidently and it’s been hellish.”

“How old are they?” Hongjoong asked.

“Ninteen months,” San answered.

Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh, “right on track then.”

“I guess, they just run around babbling like crazy drunks right now,” San laughed fondly. “It’s a lot, but they’re fun.”

Hongjoong hummed and nodded in agreement.

“So, are you having fun with Seonghwa?” San casually asked.

Hongjoong froze mid sip of his drink. He knew he was here to talk about what he was doing with Seonghwa, but he didn’t expect it to feel so casual.

“I mean yeah, I’m learning a lot,” Hongjoong answered.

San nodded, “I don’t know if I could be with someone without experience, I lose too much of myself, but Seonghwa hasn’t complained. He just seems really excited.”

Hongjoong paused again. How much had Seonghwa talked about him?

“Then again I’ve only ever been with Youngie, so what do I know,” San shrugged.

“Everyone is different,” Hongjoong mumbled before he finally took a sip of his drink.

He wanted to lead the conversation back to the girls, but he wasn’t sure if San purposefully changed the topic or not. Even though he instantly felt comfortable in the home, San was still a stranger. Hongjoong didn’t know the man next to him, and he didn’t know what he would be comfortable talking about.

Before he was forced to come up with a new topic Hongjoong was saved by a loud voice calling out from the kitchen that dinner was ready.

“Follow me,” San smiled as he stood up.

Hongjoong stood up slowly and he watched as San scooped up both of the girls, one in each arm. They both giggled at him and Isol gave him a few little kisses while Seoha patted his cheek. It was cute and made San look boyish in a way that Hongjoong wasn’t expecting. This was a man that was likely a decade older than him and Hongjoong would have easily believed that San was younger than him.

When they entered the kitchen Wooyoung gasped loudly and hopped over to his husband and their girls. He gave all three kisses before he pulled Seoha out of San’s arms to put her in her highchair. He then did the same with Isol. There was already food cut into tiny pieces on small plates in front of them. While Seoha contemplated eating Isol wasted no time and grabbed a fist full of what looked like spinach and smeared it over her mouth and chin.

“In your mouth pretty girl,” Wooyoung laughed as he reached over and used a small baby spoon to direct the mess into her mouth.

Hongjoong stood frozen.

This was what Seonghwa wanted.

“You can sit,” San laughed.

“Hongjoong!” Wooyoung nearly shrieked as his attention shifted away from his daughters.

Hongjoong couldn’t do anything but stand stiffly as Wooyoung hugged him tightly.

“Yeosang complains about you all the time,” Wooyoung laughed brightly.

“He would,” Hongjoong mumbled. “Glad he finds time for that.”

“We’re friends with him now,” San answered simply as he sat down.

“And now we’re friends with Hongjoong too,” Wooyoung announced. “San is on baby duty tonight so we can talk.”

Right. Hongjoong was here to get knowledge and wisdom from the loud man in front of him.

“Yum yum yum yum,” Isol chanted as she smacked her lips.

“That’s right, Appa makes yummy food,” San cooed at her.

“This is a lot,” Hongjoong commented.

He hadn’t even realized he said it out loud until Wooyoung answered him with a bright laugh. He had the same boyish quality to him that San did and Hongjoong didn’t really know what to do with that.

“We threw you right into the deep end,” Wooyoung said as he pushed Hongjoong towards a chair. “You’re a teacher though so we figured you could deal with a family dinner.”

“I don’t know anyone else with kids,” Hongjoong commented as Wooyoung set a bowl of stew and a bowl of rice in front of him.

“Right, you’re a baby,” Wooyoung nodded.

“I am not a baby,” Hongjoong stated firmly.

He was answered with a laugh from Wooyoung and San that only got their daughters laughing. He was outnumbered.

Seoha banged on her tray before she pointed at Hongjoong.

“That’s Hongjoong,” San answered. “He’s friends with Seonghwa.”

“Hwa,” Seoha happily squealed before she picked up a handful of rice and shoved it into her mouth.

Apparently, everyone loved Seonghwa.

“They’re very cute,” Hongjoong commented.

“They take after San,” Wooyoung smiled at his husband. “He’s the cute one.”

Hongjoong couldn’t argue with that, but he didn’t know if Wooyoung would be comfortable with him agreeing.

“You can complement him,” Wooyoung laughed. “I don’t get jealous easily.”

“That’s obvious,” Hongjoong commented without thinking. He was surprised to see San turn pink while Wooyoung just laughed.

“Anyway, enough of that,” Wooyoung waved his hand. “Do you like the food?”

Hongjoong nodded, “it’s really good.”

“Thank you,” Wooyoung grinned.

“So, what do you guys do for work?” Hongjoong questioned in an attempt to make small talk.

“Choreography for idol groups,” Wooyoung stated simply.

“Both of you?” Hongjoong looked between them.

“Yeah,” San nodded. “We have different styles, so it works out well.”

Hongjoong nodded. He was glad that his impression of San working in the entertainment industry was correct and it only made sense that Wooyoung worked with him.

“It’s not as fancy as it sounds,” Wooyoung shrugged. “It’s a lot of work.”

“I’m sure it’s very demanding. Are the girls in daycare?” Hongjoong gestured towards the kids before he took a big bite of his food.

“When they need to be,” Wooyoung nodded.

Hongjoong swallowed, “that’s good though, you need to socialize them, and when they go to school you might want to make sure they’re in different classrooms so they don’t get too dependent on each other, and they can grow independently.”

“Oh?” San’s face scrunched up slightly.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded. “Twins are hard. You don’t want them to only be known as twins, they need to be individuals too. We went over a few case studies when I was in school.”

“For teaching?” Wooyoung asked.

“No,” Hongjoong waved his hand. “I just finished grad school, child psychology. I might not teach forever, but I really like it for now. Kids are cool.”

“So, you want kids someday?” San asked with a smile.

“San,” Wooyoung said in the most serious tone that Hongjoong had heard him use so far.

“It was just a question,” San whined.

"Kids would be good someday,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I have a while to think about it though.”

“Don’t say anything,” Wooyoung pointed at San.

Hongjoong watched as San immediately closed his mouth without question or hesitation. He was a little too focused on seeing the blurred edges of their dynamic leaking out into the exchange that Hongjoong didn’t stop to think about why Wooyoung would be upset over San’s questions.

The rest of the dinner flew by in a flurry of smiles and jokes between the couple. Hongjoong was happy to sit and take it all in only interjecting when it was completely needed. Part of him felt like he was peeking into something extremely intimate that he had no business being a part of. What he was witnessing was also so clearly Yunho and Mingi’s future. This was the kind of happy life that he wanted for his friends someday.

“Sannie you’re good with both girls?” Wooyoung questioned as he started to pick up dishes from the table.

“I’ll clean up after I put them down,” San reached out and grabbed Wooyoung’s arm as he spoke.

“Okay,” Wooyoung leaned down to drop a quick kiss to San’s mouth.

Hongjoong looked away when San smiled into the kiss. He didn’t need another reason to be jealous of the couple.

“You can come with me,” Wooyoung gestured to Hongjoong.

Hongjoong stood and followed Wooyoung a little deeper into the house. They ended up in a small office that had papers and folders scattered everywhere.

“We’re staring a company,” Wooyoung explained. “We want to have our own back up dancers to work with and hire out.”

“That’s really cool,” Hongjoong commented.

“Thanks,” Wooyoung smiled. “Sorry for the clutter everywhere.”

Hongjoong shrugged, “it’s okay.”

“We could talk in the living room, but bedtime is chaos, and I don’t really want the girls to hear anything even if they wouldn’t understand anyway,” Wooyoung pulled the chair from the opposite side of the desk around to sit next to Hongjoong. “I like a firm line between family and all the kink stuff. You know?”

Hongjoong nodded. “I don’t like anyone who didn’t consent involved in anything and exposing kids to even little stuff that they might not understand is gross.”

“So, you do get it,” Wooyoung sighed.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong sat back in his chair.

“I’ve never really done this before,” Wooyoung explained. “I’ve had Dom friends, and we’ve talked and shared knowledge and stuff, but I’ve never taught anyone anything.”

“That’s fine,” Hongjoong waved his hands. “I just wanted someone normal to talk with about this stuff. My friends know, but they don’t get it. Plus, I don’t have a lot of practical experience and Seonghwa is well, a lot.”

Wooyoung let out a giggle, “he’s demanding but good.”

“I’m not sure about his ability to be good,” Hongjoong laughed. “We had a shit first scene, so I really want to do better for the next one.”

“I think he told San about it, he didn’t give me any details,” Wooyoung explained. “He still seemed excited though.”

“That’s good,” Hongjoong breathed out. “Wait is it weird to talk about your friend like this?”

“Oh no,” Wooyoung shook his head no. “We’ve known Seonghwa forever. We’ve had scenes with him and hooked up with him before too. It was all when we were younger before we got married and he met his ex. Honestly, I think Seonghwa would have just come to me for a few scenes after the divorce, but we have the whole thing with Yeosang right now so we’re a little occupied.”

Hongjoong swallowed down his jealousy. This was good news. Wooyoung knew Seonghwa and he knew what Seonghwa was into and how he reacted to things. This was the level of guidance he needed to help navigate the older man.

“Don’t make a face,” Wooyoung laughed. “There’s only Sannie for me. We just like to have fun too. San has always had a little crush on Seonghwa, but it’s completely harmless. Also, watching them kiss? Who’s going to say no to that?”

The image of San and Seonghwa kissing popped into Hongjoong’s head immediately and he swallowed roughly. This was just a talk, and he wasn’t about to get hard in front of a stranger.

“Okay we’ll move away from that,” Wooyoung laughed at him more. “Have you tried to get into the community?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong made a face. “Everyone kind of sucks? They all take themselves too seriously, or our kinks don’t line up, or they want this insane twenty-four seven thing that doesn’t exist outside of stories and porn. Then there are a lot of people who just don’t want to acknowledge me because I don’t have experience.”

Wooyoung hummed, “I agree about everyone sucking. You just need to find your own group of people and vibe with them.”

“I went to a munch, and it was family night,” Hongjoong groaned.

“That’s…”

“I know,” Hongjoong threw his hands up. “Obviously you can balance a family and kink, but not at a kink event.”

“Okay, so, you’re more private and that’s fine,” Wooyoung nodded. “I get that.”

“I mean I wouldn’t be opposed to showing off a sub, but I don’t need to scream my lifestyle to strangers that might not want to know,” Hongjoong shrugged.

“I bet you’d like clubs,” Wooyoung shifted. “They’re hard to find though because they’re not always legal depending on what goes on in them. Ones with demos and stuff are cool. It’s all adults doing adult things in a safe and monitored environment.”

Hongjoong nodded, “I’ve never found any of those.”

“Doesn’t matter you’ve got me now,” Wooyoung smiled. “And San. Talking to a sub can be good too. Anyway, what are your plans for Seonghwa on Friday?”

“Oh,” Hongjoong shifted. “Light impact play. I think he’s a masochist, and that might be why he was a little pushy the first time. He needed a firmer hand, and I was a little too scared to give it to him, so I just worked it into the next scene.”

“Smart,” Wooyoung nodded. “He can take a lot.”

“Yeah, but he’s out of practice,” Hongjoong pointed out. “We both need to ease into it.”

“True,” Wooyoung’s face got serious. “What’s the biggest issue that you’re having?”

“Confidence,” Hongjoong admitted quietly. “Sometimes I’m good. We had a conversation in his office, and it was so good and natural, but sometimes he says things that throw me off. Plus, I get hung up on being younger and inexperienced. We talked about it, but it’s still in the back of my head.”

“You’re attracted to him, right?” Wooyoung asked.

Hongjoong looked at Wooyoung like he was stupid. Of course, he thought Seonghwa was attractive. Seonghwa was likely the most beautiful man any of them had ever seen.

“Yes,” Hongjoong finally answered.

Wooyoung laughed brightly at his answer, “don’t let any insecurities get the best of you. He wants your arrangement to work out.”

Hongjoong nodded a few times before he yawned.

“We can end this for now,” Wooyoung commented. “It’s getting late and I’m sure you have work in the morning.”

“Sorry,” Hongjoong made a face at himself. “I’m enjoying the conversation I’m just tired we don’t have to stop.”

“It’s okay,” Wooyoung smiled. “You can message me anytime. We can meet up too.”

“We can?” Hongjoong perked up slightly.

“Yeah,” Wooyoung reached forward and grabbed Hongjoong’s hands. “I have a feeling you’ll be around for a while.”

“What?” Hongjoong asked as he resisted the urge to pull his hands back.

“Seonghwa is picky, he’s not going to ride off into the sunset with the first guy that takes him out,” Wooyoung commented.

Hongjoong wanted to argue with that. Seonghwa couldn’t be that picky. He picked Hongjoong even though he was just some inexperienced kid next to Seonghwa.

“Come on,” Wooyoung stood, still holding one of Hongjoong’s hands, and pulled him into the living room.

Hongjoong stumbled behind him and paused when they got to the living room and Wooyoung dropped his hand.

“He passed all the tests,” Wooyoung called out.

“Good,” San answered as he appeared in the living room carrying a large canvas bag.

“What tests?” Hongjoong frowned.

“You think we were going to let just anyone Dom our Seonghwa?” Wooyoung teased.

Hongjoong frowned, “no?”

“Exactly,” Wooyoung slapped his shoulder. “But you passed so it’s fine.”

“Here,” San thrusted the bag towards Hongjoong. “Leftovers and snacks.”

“What?” Hongjoong took the bag and looked into it. “Why?”

“You look like you need it,” San smiled.

It felt like an insult, but Hongjoong just bowed his head in thanks.

“You can call me or text me on Friday or Saturday if you want,” Wooyoung commented as he led Hongjoong back to the doorway.

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded as he fumbled with his shoes because he refused to put the bag down.

“Next time you come over you can bring the bag and the containers back,” San instructed.

“Okay,” Hongjoong repeated.

After a wave from San and another forced hug from Wooyoung he was ushered outside confronted with the cool night air. Hongjoong frowned at himself and let out a deep breath as he looked up at the sky. He’d need at least a day to process everything that had just happened. There was no way that some of their conversations didn’t go over his head. The whole experience had been as comforting as it was overstimulating.

The walk back down the winding alleyways was easier than the hike up them and soon Hongjoong found himself back in the relative comfort of his apartment. It was obvious that he had interrupted an intimate moment between Mingi and Yunho, but he was too tired to care.

“What’s in the bag?” Yunho asked when he finally managed to untangle himself from Mingi.

Hongjoong was burnt out on seeing couples in love, he just wanted to be alone in his room.

“It’s mine,” he held the bag closer to his chest.

“Do we need to find older men to spoil us?” Mingi asked as he tried to look into the bag.

“Yes, get your own,” Hongjoong grumbled. “These are my leftovers and snacks.”

“Are you sure you’re the Dom if all these men are babying you?” Yunho teased.

Hongjoong glared at him, “don’t even start.”

“I bet it’s just the I can hardly take care of myself vibes that he gives off,” Mingi commented.

“Probably,” Yunho nodded.

“Don’t,” Hongjoong pointed back at them as he walked to the kitchen. “Touch my food.”

There was no doubt that the leftover rice and stew wouldn’t be there in the morning, but Hongjoong knew enough to take the bags of chips and instant noodles into his room.

**

This time when Hongjoong entered Seonghwa’s building he didn’t feel any of the nerves that he had during his first two visits. He entered the elevator after a quick nod and bow to the security team and scanned the card he had been given. The ride up to Seonghwa’s floor was mercifully short and Hongjoong couldn’t help the giddy excitement that curled through his body. Everything seemed to be falling into place, and he had a feeling that their scene was going to go well. He had even taken the time to get off before he left his apartment.  

When Seonghwa opened the door Hongjoong was surprised to see him standing there in a well-tailored suit. It was a deep blue color with a lighter dress shirt underneath the jacket, and a patterned tie. The fit stood out more than the style, but Seonghwa looked otherworldly in it anyway. Hongjoong was so used to meeting him while Seonghwa was wearing softer lounge clothing that the suit felt like a special treat.

Then he remembered his instructions for the scene and his excitement turned to lust as he realized what was likely going on.

“I asked for lingerie,” Hongjoong stated simply as Seonghwa reached for his bag.

“I know,” Seonghwa nodded. “I have it on.”

“Did you wear it all day under your pretty suit?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded again before he slipped away to set Hongjoong’s bag aside.

Hongjoong stood in the entryway and waited for Seonghwa to return. He wanted to know if Seonghwa would take his shoes off for him again. When Seonghwa reappeared Hongjoong wasn’t disappointed, the other man dropped to his knees and took Hongjoong’s foot in his hand.

“You know, I didn’t ask you to wear it all day,” Hongjoong said with a smile as he looked down at Seonghwa. So far everything felt so much more natural than their first scene.

“I know, I wanted to,” Seonghwa looked up at him quickly before he switched feet.

“Do you like to feel a little naughty Seonghwa?” Hongjoong asked.

Seonghwa looked up at him with wide eyes and nodded. It was clear he was also falling into his submissive role much easier than he had the first time around.

“You look like a scared little bunny,” Hongjoong commented.

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa shut his eyes. He took a few breaths before he opened them again and looked up at Hongjoong.

“I’m excited,” Seonghwa answered. “But I’m also nervous and anxious.”

“Cute little bunny,” Hongjoong commented. “Don’t be nervous. I’m going to give you exactly what you want tonight.”

Seonghwa nodded and his tongue darted out to lick over his lips, wetting them prettily.

“Stand up,” Hongjoong ordered as he took a small step back to give Seonghwa the space he needed.

Hongjoong quietly noted their size difference and smiled to himself. Seonghwa was bigger than him in nearly every way, but he was so willing and pliant right now.

“Are you ready to show me what’s under your suit?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa nodded sharply.

Hongjoong looked towards the living room and was happy to see that Seonghwa had moved the coffee table to the side. He walked over to one of the armchairs in the living room and pointed to the floor in front of him before he sat down. Seonghwa easily followed the instruction and stood directly in front of Hongjoong. His toes were wiggling nervously against the carpet under them, and Hongjoong knew he needed to push things forward.

“Take the suit off Seonghwa,” Hongjoong sat back and spread his legs. “Clearly you had a plan so show me what it was.”

Seonghwa shrugged his jacket off and laid it on the coffee table before he pulled his tie loose. It wasn’t a show, but Hongjoong hadn’t asked for that. He appreciated the way that Seonghwa was being methodical, somehow it suited him more than a strip tease would. Someday Hongjoong would ask for that though. He just wanted to know if Seonghwa would be nervous and blushing or if his confidence would take over.

Hongjoong watched closely as Seonghwa bent to set his tie down. His pants stretched deliciously over his ass, and Hongjoong couldn’t help but lick his lips. He wanted his face buried in that ass.

When Seonghwa turned around his fingers played with the top button of his shirt before he gave up and pulled the shirt out of his pants before he unbuckled his belt and pulled it off.

“Don’t tease,” Hongjoong warned.

“I’m not,” Seonghwa threw on a fake offended face, and Hongjoong was happy to see that Seonghwa was still going to be at least a little defiant. He wanted the challenge now that he felt better about pushing back.

Hongjoong raised his eyebrows in answer.

It was enough of a message that Seonghwa quickly set his belt down before he turned to face Hongjoong and slowly undid each button on his shirt. Seonghwa’s fingers were trembling slightly and Hongjoong couldn’t help but wonder why he was so nervous. Hongjoong looked at Seonghwa’s face and he was surprised to see a tight look of focus displayed.

Before he could ask Seonghwa what his color was the submissive turned around. As he moved Hongjoong saw a flash of white lace with a little green detail that made his mouth go dry. Hongjoong didn’t have time to recover before Seonghwa dropped his shirt off his shoulders and let it slide down his back.

Hongjoong swallowed dryly, “show me.”

Seonghwa paused before he turned around. His face was fully flushed, and a few strands of his blond hair had broken free from their styling and fallen into his face. Hongjoong had never seen anyone or anything more beautiful in his entire life.

The bra Seonghwa was wearing had a white lace base with an intricate floral design sewn into it. The fabric over Seonghwa’s pecs sat flush against his skin and Hongjoong couldn’t help but wonder if the bra was made for men, or if it was specifically made for Seonghwa.

Either way he wanted to rip it off Seonghwa’s body until nothing was left but tiny shreds of the delicate fabric.

“Is this okay Sir?” Seonghwa asked quietly as his dress shirt finally fell to the floor.

“You’re beautiful,” Hongjoong answered quickly.

Seonghwa looked to the side, causing more hair to fall into his face. It looked like Seonghwa was trying to hide behind it. Hongjoong didn’t want Seonghwa to hide himself, but he was frozen. It wasn’t an exaggeration when he said Seonghwa looked like a scared bunny earlier. He still looked like he would run away if Hongjoong said one wrong thing.

“Show me more please,” Hongjoong coached.

Seonghwa nodded to himself, and his hands went to the waist of his dress pants. Hongjoong thought idly about what it would be like to rip open the back of them and fuck Seonghwa through them, but that wasn’t for today. Today he was going to focus on giving Seonghwa the kind of experience that he truly deserved.

When Seonghwa pulled down the zipper on his pants Hongjoong saw the white fabric underneath and he could not look away. Then Seonghwa turned around again. Hongjoong let out a frustrated groan, and he was answered with a nervous laugh from Seonghwa.

“I told you not to tease,” Hongjoong gritted out as he pressed the palm of his hand down on his hard cock.

Seonghwa didn’t answer, he bent to pick his shirt up and set it aside before he bent over more purposefully. This time, as he bent at the waist, he pushed his pants down over his ass and Hongjoong was treated to a perfect view of the way the white lace panties pulled tight across Seonghwa’s ass.

Hongjoong’s mouth started to water.

Seonghwa to turned around slowly and Hongjoong wasn’t ready for the full visual. He hadn’t expected Seonghwa to be hard, but there his cock was, deliciously full and tucked to the right. A large dark spot by the head let Hongjoong know that he was even leaking.

“Oh Seonghwa,” Hongjoong cooed at him. “I thought you were nervous?”

“I am Sir,” Seonghwa’s hands were clenching and unclenching at his sides.

“Then why are you so hard?” Hongjoong stood. “And leaking.”

Seonghwa inhaled rather than answering.

“Do you like being embarrassed Seonghwa?” Hongjoong questioned as he reached out to run his fingers over the bra. His fingers pressed against Seonghwa’s nipples, and he smiled at the gasp he got in response to the action.

Seonghwa nodded, “I’ve never done this.”

The realization of what Seonghwa was trying to say hit Hongjoong and he couldn’t help but be surprised. Seonghwa had been very open about having a collection of lingerie. How could he have never shared it with anyone before?

“Not even your husband?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Ex husband,” Seonghwa shook his head. “And no. Only you Sir.”

“Thank you for sharing this with me Seonghwa,” Hongjoong said honestly as his eyes roamed over Seonghwa’s face. “My pretty little bunny.”

Seonghwa exhaled and his posture became a little more laxed.

Hongjoong brought his hands back to Seonghwa’s chest and this time he grabbed Seonghwa’s pecs before he massaged them roughly. Before Seonghwa could get too into it Hongjoong dropped one hand down so his fingertips could graze over the sticky wet fabric at the head of Seonghwa’s cock.

“Do you always get this wet?” Hongjoong asked.

“If I’m turned on,” Seonghwa answered. “Sir.”

“My perfect boy,” Hongjoong murmured.

Hongjoong watched, amused, as Seonghwa fought a smile that spread across his face.

“I promise I love the view,” Hongjoong reassured Seonghwa as he reached around him to unclasp the bra. “But your bra is about to be in the way. I can’t wait to see what else you have in your collection though.”

Seonghwa nodded and let the article of clothing drop to the floor. Hongjoong watched with a smile as Seonghwa looked down at the bra clearly trying to fight the urge to pick it up. Hongjoong took a step back and looked over the room. He hadn’t asked Seonghwa to get anything ready for their scene, but he needed lube, and he had no idea where his backpack was so he couldn’t get it himself.

“Seonghwa?” Hongjoong asked as he tried to mask his mistake.

“Yes Sir?” Seonghwa’s eyes moved from the bra on the floor to Hongjoong.

“Even with how wet you are we’ll need lube today,” Hongjoong smiled as Seonghwa’s eyes widened. “I have some in my backpack, but I don’t know where you tucked it away.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa nodded. “I can get mine.”

“Go,” Hongjoong nodded.

Once Seonghwa was out of sight Hongjoong bent down and picked up the bra. He was tempted to put the garment in his pocket but settled on dropping it on top of the neat pile of clothing. Someday he’d have to destroy one of Seonghwa’s sets and take the tattered pieces home.

“Sir?”

Hongjoong froze for a moment before he turned. Seonghwa was simply standing there, in his pretty panties holding a bottle of lube, but Hongjoong couldn’t imagine anything more perfect.

“Is this okay?” Seonghwa asked nervously.

“Yes,” Hongjoong nodded. “Sorry I keep staring, but you look like you walked out of one of my wet dreams.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa’s cheeks reddened.

“Hold that bottle for me,” Hongjoong smiled.

Seonghwa cocked his head to the side and looked nearly panicked as Hongjoong dropped to his knees.

“Remind me of how you safeword bunny,” Hongjoong ordered.

“Yellow to slow down red to stop,” Seonghwa mumbled. It was obvious that he was trying to figure out exactly what was going on.

“And when your mouth is full?” Hongjoong pushed.

“I pinch your leg or thigh,” Seonghwa finished.

Hongjoong reached his hands out to place them on Seonghwa’s thighs as he spoke, “good boy.”

When Hongjoong looked up Seonghwa was staring down at him with his mouth slightly parted. He ignored the look and looped his fingers under the elastic of Seonghwa’s panties by his hips, but he didn’t tug them down. He ran his fingertips over the soft skin before he dropped his hands.

Hongjoong wanted to lean in and lap at Seonghwa’s length through the fabric, but that wasn’t what he had planned for the evening, and he knew he’d get carried away. Tonight, he was determined to give Seonghwa exactly what he needed.

“You’re so over eager,” Hongjoong commented.

“I’m sorry Sir,” Seonghwa muttered in reply.

“Don’t be sorry,” Hongjoong spoke as he cupped Seonghwa’s length.

There was a moment of quiet before Hongjoong pulled down the front of the panties until the elastic was nestled under Seonghwa’s balls. It caused the fabric near Seonghwa’s hips to dip and dig into his skin. Hongjoong didn’t bother to fix it, he was about to make Seonghwa far more uncomfortable.

Hongjoong took Seonghwa’s cock in one of his hands and raised the other one. In an instant he brought it down on the length careful to avoid the head until he knew just how sensitive Seonghwa was. Seonghwa’s body reacted beautifully, he tensed, but didn’t move, and gasped softly in shock.

“Color?” Hongjoong asked.

“Green,” Seonghwa whispered.

“What was that?” Hongjoong pushed just to tease him.

Seonghwa shifted his hips and spoke louder, “green.”

Hongjoong’s reply was another harder smack to the length of Seonghwa’s cock. It pulled another gasp out of Seonghwa, but he still didn’t move. The next time Hongjoong brought his hand down he didn’t avoid the head of Seonghwa’s cock. This time Seonghwa let out a grunt and when Hongjoong looked up his face was tense and scrunched up.

“You’re still so hard,” Hongjoong commented as he slapped Seonghwa’s cock again. “Do you like this?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa gasped when Hongjoong hit him another time.

“Tell me what you like Seonghwa,” Hongjoong paused to look up at him.

“I like when you,” Seonghwa moaned as Hongjoong’s hand came down on his cock. “Slap my cock.”

“Then I should stop,” Hongjoong dropped his hands and gave an amused smile when Seonghwa’s cock twitched at the lack of contact.

“No no,” Seonghwa mumbled.

Hongjoong stood, “I make the rules here bunny, go bend over the arm of the couch. And I don’t want your needy little cock touching it.”

Seonghwa’s eyes went wide, and he paused just long enough for Hongjoong to worry that he had done something wrong, or that Seonghwa’s disobedience had returned. Before Hongjoong could fully gauge the situation Seonghwa moved, and shuffled, to the couch before he bent over the arm. Seonghwa’s body was beautiful even though Hongjoong could tell that the position was uncomfortable. The way the arm dug into the spot under Seonghwa’s ribs had to be adjusted.

“Move up a little bit,” Hongjoong requested.

Seonghwa shifted forward until the arm was pressing against his stomach and his forearms were on the couch cushion. His legs were still stretched uncomfortably, and Hongjoong knew he couldn’t be left in that position for too long.

“Do you know what happens now?” Hongjoong asked as he pulled the panties down enough that Seonghwa’s entire ass was exposed.

“Spanking.” Seonghwa mumbled into the couch.

“Yes,” Hongjoong pulled the panties down under the cleft of Seonghwa’s ass, stretching them over his thighs. “And why am I spanking you?”

“Because I want it,” Seonghwa answered breathlessly.

“Exactly,” Hongjoong nodded to himself. “Color.”

“Green,” Seonghwa looked back at Hongjoong with a frown on his face.

Hongjoong didn’t hold back his laugh. He liked Seonghwa’s bratty side when he knew it could be controlled. This part of the scene was the perfect part for Seonghwa to push back slightly. They both knew what he wanted, and Hongjoong was making him wait for it.

Spanking was something that Hongjoong was familiar with. It was one of the reasons that he wanted to bring it into the scene.  They both needed to be comfortable for it to go well and Hongjoong was confident that he could color Seonghwa’s ass nicely before he gave in and played with it.

The only issue with hand spanking was that it didn’t take long for Hongjoong’s hand to start stinging from the constant contact. It was easy enough to ignore when Seonghwa’s hips danced from side to side so prettily each time Hongjoong’s hand made contact with his ass. It was addicting, and Hongjoong got completely lost in the moment when little whines started to spill out of Seonghwa’s mouth.

There was a specific shade of red Hongjoong had in mind and he was determined not to stop until Seonghwa’s ass got there. As Hongjoong continued to spank Seonghwa he found himself in awe with the fact that Seonghwa would trust him with something like this.

It was easy to get lost in the moment and lose track of time completely. Before he knew it Hongjoong noticed that the right rosy hue had taken over most of Seonghwa’s ass and he forced himself to stop. His hand hurt, and Seonghwa’s back was heaving with how hard he was breathing.

They both needed to calm down, but Hongjoong wanted more.

Hongjoong dropped to his knees behind Seonghwa and when he leaned forward, he could feel the heat coming off the other man’s skin. Seonghwa’s ass was angry and red, but it wasn’t anything that wouldn’t be completely healed by the next morning.

Without thinking about it too much Hongjoong leaned forward and ran his tongue up Seonghwa’s right cheek, and bit down when he reached the plumpest part.

“Sir,” Seonghwa yelled out as he shifted forward.

The word when right to Hongjoong’s cock and he wrapped an arm around Seonghwa’s hips to pull him back. Again, with very little thought he pushed his face forward and buried himself in Seonghwa’s ass. He shouldn’t have done it without warning, but Hongjoong couldn’t hold back. He needed to taste his Seonghwa.

Seonghwa was completely his in his moment, and Hongjoong needed to make him feel so good that he couldn’t have a successful date because Hongjoong was always there in the back of his head.

Seonghwa tasted like clean skin and smelled lightly of whatever soap he had used to clean himself with. Hongjoong lapped wetly over his hole before he traced the creased and wrinkled skin with the very tip of his tongue. It was hard to breathe but he honestly didn’t mind dying with his face buried in Seonghwa’s ass.

“Oh god,” Seonghwa moaned out. “Sir.”

Hongjoong’s cock was throbbing, but he ignored it and pulled Seonghwa even closer to him as his tongue finally slid wetly into Seonghwa. It was just the tip and Hongjoong couldn’t believe how amazingly tight Seonghwa felt.

“More,” Seonghwa gasped.

That request broke Hongjoong out of his spell and he pushed himself backwards until he flopped back onto his ass on the floor. His breath came out in heavy puffs as he ran his arm over his mouth to wipe away the spit that had accumulated there. Seonghwa’s ass was red, and slick with spit but Hongjoong couldn’t look away from the obvious bite mark. Each one of his teeth was perfectly outlined in Seonghwa’s skin.

Seonghwa was his, even if it was just until the mark faded.

“No, more, please more,” Seonghwa pushed up and looked back at Hongjoong.

Seonghwa’s eyes were wide and wet and Hongjoong couldn’t move.

Their eyes met, and somehow Seonghwa found the confidence to smirk. Just how wrecked did Hongjoong look?

That small smirk was enough to light a fire in Hongjoong’s brain. He stood slowly and ran his hands over his shirt and pants before he took a few steps towards the couch. With a sigh he sat down on the edge of the couch right next to Seonghwa’s head.

“What?” Seonghwa looked at Hongjoong. “Sir?”

Hongjoong laughed and patted his hand on his thighs. Seonghwa’s eyes went a little wider, but he slowly slid backwards of the couch and stood up. His fingers went to his now very stretched out panties to pull them down.

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I didn’t tell you to take them off.”

“Oh.”

Seonghwa’s bottom lip jutted out into a little pout, but he laid his torso over Hongjoong’s lap anyway.

“Hands on the floor bunny,” Hongjoong reached back to slap Seonghwa’s ass.

Seonghwa obeyed instantly and shifted forward until his thighs were pressed against the side of Hongjoong’s leg. It was another uncomfortable position, but this wasn’t about Seonghwa’s comfort, it was about getting him off. Selfishly it was also about Hongjoong finally getting a chance to explore Seonghwa’s body.

“Good bunny,” Hongjoong commented as his eyes looked around for the bottle of lube that Seonghwa had been holding.

It took him a moment, but he looked down at Seonghwa’s hand and couldn’t help but smile when he saw that Seonghwa was still holding the bottle.

“Give me the lube,” Hongjoong ordered.

Seonghwa’s hand came up a little too quickly and Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh. Everything they were doing felt so right and natural. It was insane to think about how awkward their first meeting had been. Right now, it was like someone else had taken over Hongjoong’s brain and given him the confidence to say and do everything that he would have overthought doing a few weeks ago.

Hongjoong popped the cap and turned the bottle until the lube was dripping out right over the crack of Seonghwa’s ass. He didn’t want to ruin the couch, so he was careful to stop when it was too much even though he wanted to make it as wet and sloppy as possible.

“Stop,” Seonghwa breathed out. “Stop teasing.”

Hongjoong’s eyebrows went up and he debated how to handle the request. He wasn’t completely aware of exactly how far he could push Seonghwa, but he hooked his pointer finger and slid it into Seonghwa’s body without any prep or finesse.

“Fuck,” Seonghwa spat out as he shifted forward.

Hongjoong laughed again as he worked another finger into Seonghwa, “this is what you wanted. I’m not teasing.”

The desperate noises that came out of Seonghwa’s body as Hongjoong fingered him were sounds that Hongjoong had never managed to pull out of any of his other partners. Seonghwa could have just responded prettily but Hongjoong didn’t care. His confidence grew with every whimper that slipped past Seonghwa’s lips. It was so obvious that Seonghwa was on the edge and Hongjoong didn’t have it in him to correct Seonghwa when he felt the submissive grinding his cock against his thigh.

When Hongjoong pressed in a third finger Seonghwa stilled. Hongjoong was ready to ask for the other man’s color and then Seonghwa started to move his hips again. There was no doubt that Seonghwa was enjoying himself, and the tight heat wrapped around Hongjoong’s fingers was starting to drive him crazy. To keep himself grounded Hongjoong brought his free hand down on Seonghwa’s ass a few times despite the awkward angle and was rewarded with Seonghwa clenching around him tightly.

It was then that Hongjoong truly realized he didn’t know Seonghwa’s body yet. Without warning, Seonghwa’s body went stiff before his thrusts against Hongjoong’s thigh got sloppy. When Seonghwa let out a low satisfied groan Hongjoong knew exactly what had happened. They hadn’t talked about Seonghwa needing permission to cum, but Hongjoong couldn’t help but feel like this was something he could push on.

“Dirty boy couldn’t hold back?” Hongjoong commented as he slowly slid his fingers out of Seonghwa’s body. “Get on your knees.”

Hongjoong let Seonghwa take his time as he slowly got down onto his knees despite the way his legs were shaking slightly. Hongjoong looked down at his lap, and the cum that was painted across it. He absently hoped that none got onto the couch before his attention went back to Seonghwa.

“Clean up your mess,” Hongjoong pointed to his lap.

Seonghwa’s mouth bypassed the cum and went right for Hongjoong’s hard cock. He couldn’t help but groan at the sudden attention.

“Slut,” Hongjoong nearly growled. He had no idea where he got the self-control from, but he grabbed onto Seonghwa’s hair and pulled his head back. “Clean up your mess and maybe I’ll let you get me off.”

Seonghwa nodded and his tongue slowly extended out and licked over the material of Hongjoong’s pants. Hongjoong watched on in amazement. There was no way this was real. He couldn’t have the most beautiful man he had ever seen, on his knees, lapping his own cum off Hongjoong’s pants.

But here he was completely awake basking in his new reality.

“Good boy Seonghwa,” Hongjoong cooed and petted Seonghwa’s head gently before he smoothed back the hair that he had messed up over the course of their scene.

Seonghwa hummed happily and when he was done, he sat back on his heels and opened his mouth. Hongjoong wanted to laugh at the tiny pool of cum on Seonghwa’s tongue, but he could only smile.

“Take my cock out,” Hongjoong said firmly. “Don’t do anything else.”

That made Seonghwa snort out a laugh and Hongjoong couldn’t help it when his own smile grew. He sat back against the couch and watched closely as Seonghwa fumbled with his pants. Once his cock was out Seonghwa’s hands went to Hongjoong’s thighs, and he gripped them tightly.

Yet again, Hongjoong knew he wasn’t going to last. That wasn’t the issue though. Hongjoong had no idea how he wanted Seonghwa to get him off. He remembered Seonghwa saying that he liked to be used but Hongjoong didn’t know if he was ready for that just yet. Maybe he could try though, just to get a sneak peek at how pretty Seonghwa must look with his throat stuffed full of cock

“I’m going to use you,” Hongjoong announced. He wanted to give Seonghwa an out if he needed one.

It was clear Seonghwa didn’t need an out. He opened his mouth and stuck out his tongue. Hongjoong’s cock twitched at the action, he could look at Seonghwa in lewd positions all day long. Maybe someday Seonghwa would be comfortable with him taking pictures.

“Okay,” Hongjoong said mostly to himself as he shifted forward.

He positioned himself in a squatted pose and angled his cock down until it came into contact with Seonghwa’s tongue. Hongjoong bit back his moan as he pushed his hips forward and watched as his cock disappeared back into Seonghwa’s throat. When Seonghwa gagged Hongjoong only paused for a moment before he pressed forward more. He didn’t stop until Seonghwa’s nose was buried in his pubic hair and his tongue was teasing Hongjoong’s balls.

“Fuck,” Hongjoong muttered.

Then Seonghwa opened his eyes and looked up.

It was all Hongjoong to do to not cum instantly at the visual, but he had to have some level of self-control.

He rocked his hips forward and was rewarded with another gag. The way it made Seonghwa’s throat tighten around him was maddening. There was no way that Hongjoong was going to last even if he wasn’t already so worked up to begin with. So, Hongjoong moved his hips slowly and threw his head back to look at the ceiling rather than the god that was on his knees in front of him.

Hongjoong’s cock was still buried deep in Seonghwa’s throat when he felt a familiar tightening behind his balls that let him know he was too close to hold back anymore. Hongjoong pulled out of the warm mouth and instantly wrapped a hand around himself. Seonghwa didn’t flinch. He held the same pose with his mouth wide open and his tongue out only now his eyes were closed.

When Hongjoong came his cum splattered across Seonghwa’s nose and cheek prettily while he moved forward so the rest would get in Seonghwa’s mouth. When he was done, he rubbed the head of his cock over Seonghwa’s clean cheek before he flopped back on the couch to catch his breath.

Seconds later he realized he had no idea how to end the scene, and that they really hadn’t gone over any kind of aftercare. Hongjoong felt himself panic as he sat up and realized that he didn’t even know where Seonghwa’s bathroom was. How was he going to clean the other man up?

“I don’t know where your bathroom is, or where you have clothes to change into,” Hongjoong said quietly.

Seonghwa opened his eyes and smiled, “I guess we missed that.”

“Are you good?” Hongjoong leaned forward. “Let me clean you up.”

“I’m good,” Seonghwa nodded and nearly fell over when he went to stand.

Hongjoong scrambled to get up, “hold on.” He tucked his now soft cock back into his pants before he leaned down to help Seonghwa stand.

There was a moment where he had to decide what to do with Seonghwa’s panties. Hongjoong bent down and pulled them further down Seonghwa’s hips. He frowned at the red lines from where the material had cut into Seonghwa’s skin. He hadn’t realized the fabric had been stretched that tightly. Seonghwa didn’t seem to notice, and he obediently stepped out of the garment when Hongjoong tapped at his ankles indicating him to lift his feet.

Hongjoong stood up straight again and awkwardly held the panties out to Seonghwa.

“You can keep them,” Seonghwa smiled. “Pervert.”

Hongjoong’s eyebrows went up, but he tucked the panties into his pocket anyway, “takes one to know one.”

Seonghwa let out a breathy laugh, “the bathroom is this way.”

Hongjoong followed him and was embarrassed that he hadn’t thought to ask about aftercare when he knew they were going to do impact play.

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong sighed.

“What?” Seonghwa looked back at him and frowned.

Hongjoong couldn’t help but reach out and wipe some of the cum off his face. He couldn’t take Seonghwa seriously like this.

“I didn’t ask about aftercare,” Hongjoong admitted.

“This time it’s okay,” Seonghwa admitted as he opened up a drawer and pulled out a package of wipes.

Hongjoong snatched it before Seonghwa could open the pouch. He pulled out two and wiped down his dirty fingers before he took Seonghwa’s chin in his hand so he could hold him still while he cleaned off his face.

“I think we did better this time,” Hongjoong commented.

“You think?” Seonghwa laughed in a giddy way that Hongjoong hadn’t heard before. “I haven’t cum that hard in so long.”

“Oh?” Hongjoong smiled. “It was that good?”

“It was,” Seonghwa nodded. “I have no idea how you got that good that quickly.”

“That’s not nice,” Hongjoong frowned as he turned Seonghwa around.

“I know I had to adjust my attitude, but you just,” Seonghwa rambled. “I don’t even know Hongjoong. That was a really good scene, better than some I’ve had with people who are experienced.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile as he cleaned Seonghwa’s ass, “thank you. Do you need a shower? Or just something to put on?”

“Just a change of clothes. I’ll shower later,” Seonghwa answered.

“You were good too,” Hongjoong admitted as he moved to wash his hands. “I think both our brains finally realized what we were trying to achieve.”

“I think so,” Seonghwa nodded. “Let me go get changed and then I’ll show you around so you can be better prepared for next time.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded.

They exited the bathroom together and Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa disappeared behind a door at the end of the hallway. He respected that Seonghwa didn’t want him in his bedroom, but he wanted to be the one to dress the other man. After one last look at the door Hongjoong sighed and made his way back to the living room. He went to the couch and scanned it for any wet spots or cum.

“Did we make that much of a mess?” Seonghwa asked as he came back into the room.

“No,” Hongjoong looked up.

He was surprised to see Seonghwa in sweatpants and an oversized hoodie. So far, he had only seen the other man in suits and flowy loungewear. In this outfit, with the hood up, Seonghwa looked younger and more approachable. Hongjoong’s fingers itched to touch him and pull him into a hug.

“We’ll need a towel next time,” Seonghwa commented.

“We might need a supply list,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Do you normally bounce back this quickly?”

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I just feel high right now. I have no idea how I’m going to sleep.”

“You’re going to crash in like an hour when all those feel good chemicals wear off,” Hongjoong commented.

“It’s going to be the best sleep,” Seonghwa said with a smile.

Hongjoong laughed, “hey, did you mind me calling you bunny?”

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Not at all.”

“Were you really that nervous?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes, and excited,” Seonghwa admitted. “It just felt different."

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “Show me around. Like where do you keep putting my bag?”

Seonghwa laughed, “it’s in the closet. Come on.”

Hongjoong followed him blindly to the far side of the living room and watched as Seonghwa pressed on the wall. A door popped open, and a collection of shoes, coats and umbrellas was revealed along with Hongjoong’s bag. Seonghwa handed it over to him with a smile.

“There’s an office back there,” Seonghwa pointed to a door. “But there’s not much else. It’s just a lot of empty space. There’s only the one bathroom, and you’ve seen the living room, dining area and the kitchen.”

Hongjoong nodded.

“I think Wednesday we need to talk about aftercare more,” Hongjoong said with a nod. “Is that good?”

“Yeah,” Seonghwa nodded. “I can’t think straight right now anyway.”

Hongjoong laughed, “I get that.”

“Do you?” Seonghwa’s smile dropped into a little frown. “You seem kind of low energy. Do you need anything?”

“No,” Hongjoong answered quickly. “I feel amazing, maybe a little in shock.”

“Shock,” Seonghwa echoed with a laugh before his face turned a little more serious. “You did an amazing job Hongjoong.”

“You too,” Hongjoong nodded. “I think you could even be a little more bratty if you wanted to.”

That brought the smile back to Seonghwa’s face, “okay.”

“Was there anything you didn’t like?” Hongjoong questioned. “And I didn’t realize you hadn’t worn lingerie for anyone else before. Thank you for being comfortable with showing me that side of you.”

“You could have taken the panties off,” Seonghwa answered.

“They were pretty,” Hongjoong pouted.

“That’s why they’re in your pocket,” Seonghwa laughed. “And you’re welcome. There’s just something about you that makes me feel safe. I want to be myself with you.”

Hongjoong smiled and reached out to grab the arm of Seonghwa’s sweatshirt. He tugged on it until the other man tumbled forward into his arms. Hongjoong gave Seonghwa a tight hug. He wasn’t aware of what he’d need as aftercare, but Hongjoong did feel like he had to be close to Seonghwa right now. It was going to be hard to leave and fall asleep alone.

“I’ll see you Wednesday?” Seonghwa questioned as he pulled away from Hongjoong.

“Yeah of course,” Hongjoong smiled before he reluctantly turned towards the entryway.

“Don’t you dare,” Seonghwa said in a firm tone as Hongjoong leaned down to grab his shoe.

Hongjoong let out a breathy laugh and looked down amazed as Seonghwa got to his knees and put Hongjoong’s shoes on. He’d have to think of more simple acts of service that they could engage in during their weekly meetings.

When Seonghwa stood back up Hongjoong knew it was time to leave. It felt like they were missing something though.

“You’re sure you’re good,” Hongjoong said to stall. “It’s your first real scene in a while.”

“I’m good,” Seonghwa nodded. “I’ll call you if that changes, okay?”

“If you need me to come back I will,” Hongjoong nodded firmly.

“Okay,” Seonghwa smiled. “I think I’ll be okay though.”

Hongjoong nodded. “Okay, so I’ll see you Wednesday.”

“Wednesday,” Seonghwa smiled and held his hand up in a wave as Hongjoong opened the door.

An empty feeling settled in Hongjoong on his way home. It sat right next to the pure joy of a successful scene. Hongjoong logically knew it was likely just his brain chemically coming down, but he couldn’t shake the melancholy feeling no matter how much he rationalized it. He should have stayed with Seonghwa longer, he should have cleaned his body better, he should have been there to shower with him, there were so many other things Hongjoong should have done.

With a sigh he pulled out his phone and dialed Wooyoung’s number. He wasn’t surprised when it went to voicemail, but rather than hanging up he decided to leave a message.

“How much aftercare do Doms need? The scene was so good, but I don’t feel great. I should have done more for him after. I didn’t even know where his bathroom was. Seonghwa seemed fine, I just don’t feel as good as I did in scene. Is this normal? I’m not like in crisis or anything. I know I’ll feel better in the morning. I’m just confused because it was great, all of it was so great, but my brain is mush. I don’t know. Anyway, sorry for calling so late. I’m glad you didn’t answer.”

Hongjoong hung up the phone and finished his walk home. When he got into bed, he fell asleep almost instantly, which wasn’t something he had done in years. He didn’t even know he had it in himself to sleep that deeply anymore.

When Hongjoong woke up, later than he wanted to, he had two messages on his phone. One was a thank you from Seonghwa that he hearted and the other was a message from Wooyoung. He assured Hongjoong that his feelings were normal, and then demanded that they meet on Tuesday during Hongjoong’s lunch break.

At least he was well supported.

Chapter Text

Hongjoong had felt off all weekend and into the start of the week. His bad mood was obvious enough to everyone around him, but he still managed to force a smile for the kids in his classroom. They didn’t need to know he was going through something.

It was like this heaviness had settled over him, and he couldn’t pin down where it came from. The scene had gone fine, Seonghwa was happy, and Hongjoong knew he should’ve been happy too.

Still, even now, sitting in the back of a café waiting for Wooyoung, he couldn’t shake the dark cloud hanging over him. He hadn’t even been able to think of an idea for the next scene with Seonghwa, and they were supposed to meet the next day.

“So, you’re an idiot,” Wooyoung said as he dropped into the chair across from him.

Hongjoong straightened up, frowning, and then immediately flinched when Wooyoung leaned over the table and flicked him in the forehead.

“Dom drop,” Wooyoung said, flopping back into his seat and grabbing his coffee.

“Doms don’t drop,” Hongjoong muttered, still scowling. He wasn’t about to rub his forehead, even though it stung.

Wooyoung laughed so loud a few people turned to look, but Hongjoong kept his eyes down.

“Okay, you’re both dumb, actually,” Wooyoung said. “Hyung knows better, and should have noticed plus you had to have seen Dom drop mentioned somewhere in all your, like, horny BDSM studying.”

Hongjoong let out a breath, sharp and annoyed. No, he hadn’t seen it mentioned before, but it made sense.

“Explain,” he muttered.

“It’s the same as sub drop,” Wooyoung said with a shrug. “Doms need aftercare too. Emotional, physical, whatever. Usually after a heavy scene, but your first real one would be enough for a drop too.”

Hongjoong squinted at him, then groaned and dropped his head onto the table. This was why he had Wooyoung, but God, he hated that he was right.

“So how do I fix it?” he mumbled into the table.

“Well… what actually bothered you?” Wooyoung asked.

“We didn’t talk about aftercare,” Hongjoong said as he lifted his head. “I didn’t even know where his bathroom was. Then he was just glowing and happy. He had the dumbest smile on his face, but he didn’t need anything from me. He showed me around and then I left.”

Wooyoung nodded. “He was fine, by the way. He loved it enough to refuse to give me details.”

Hongjoong smiled. “Yeah, I wasn’t questioning if he liked it at all.”

“What did you need from him then?” Wooyoung tilted his head a little.

“To know he was good? To sit with him for a little bit, maybe?” Hongjoong shrugged. “I like to pamper my partners. Seonghwa didn’t even really want me to help him clean up.”

“Oh.” Wooyoung nodded. “You need to tell him you need more. Was there impact play?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded. “That didn’t bother me though. He was very into it, and so was I.”

“Sounds about right,” Wooyoung mumbled before taking another long sip of his drink. “He bounces back quickly most of the time, but Seonghwa isn’t going to say no to you pampering him.”

“I feel like I failed because I didn’t even think about aftercare, or knowing where the bathroom was,” Hongjoong said with a frown.

“Because you’re an idiot,” Wooyoung said fondly, smiling. “You’re learning, and it didn’t hurt him. It’s okay, don’t beat yourself up. Just do better this week. Don’t you guys have a date tomorrow to go over that stuff?”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but fluster at the word date.

“How did the scene go anyway?” Wooyoung asked as his eyes roamed over Hongjoong’s face.

“It was good,” Hongjoong said with a nod. “He was so good, but pushed just enough. I think he could be a little more bratty and I’d be fine with it. It was like everything just dropped into place the second the door shut. We were both so excited. He was nervous too, and so pretty about it. His body and how he moves when he’s in that submissive space is something I’ve never seen. Even how he drops down on his knees is so elegant, but it’s not the same Seonghwa I see outside of his apartment. I still can’t believe he’s slumming it with me.”

“Oh wow, okay.” Wooyoung frowned and pressed his lips together. “That’s a lot to unpack.”

Hongjoong felt his face turn beet red. What had he even just said?

“Firstly, he’s not slumming it,” Wooyoung said, straightening. “You’re attractive, and clearly good at this whole thing even though you haven’t done it a lot. I’ve been told you communicate well.”

“Well enough,” Hongjoong grumbled.

“Stop.” Wooyoung held up his hand. “No beating yourself up around me. That’s banned. It’s either something you can work on or something you’ve mastered.”

“I’m not a sixteen-year-old you’re teaching new choreography to,” Hongjoong muttered.

“Then don’t act like it,” Wooyoung shot back with a smirk.

Hongjoong opened and closed his mouth. He didn’t have anything smart to say to that.

“Secondly, I think it’s important that you remember Seonghwa isn’t yours,” Wooyoung said plainly after a long silence.

“I know that,” Hongjoong replied instantly, even though the comment made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

“It’s hard to let a sub go no matter what, and Seonghwa is very lovable,” Wooyoung sighed. “Don’t set yourself up for more hurt.”

“I’m not trying to,” Hongjoong said with a frown. “In a not-being-mean-to-myself way, I know I don’t stand a chance.”

“If you thought you did, you should tell him though,” Wooyoung said with a shrug. “Save you both some headaches.”

“It’s not like that.” Hongjoong waved his hand. “What we’re doing is transactional. I learn, he gets to scratch an itch before he finds a guy to start a family with.”

“Right, transactional,” Wooyoung said with a nod.

Hongjoong looked around the café and then down at his cup. Had Seonghwa said something that made Wooyoung suggest they could be more? No. That wasn’t a possibility, and Hongjoong knew he couldn’t focus on that hope or even keep it in the back of his mind. Seonghwa needed things from a life partner that Hongjoong couldn’t provide. All he could do was be the best play partner he could be for Seonghwa.

“What are you guys doing this weekend?” Wooyoung asked, breaking the silence.

“I’ve kind of been wallowing too much to think about it,” Hongjoong admitted. “More impact play. I think it helps him relax.”

Wooyoung nodded. “If you want to run any plans by me, let me know.”

“I will,” Hongjoong said with a nod. “I think it’ll be more like last time, just with better aftercare.”

Wooyoung nodded again. “Sounds good. So, San asked me to float something by you. Feel free to say no, but I think it could be helpful.”

“Okay.” Hongjoong checked the time on his phone. He had to be back in his classroom soon.

“It’s quick.” Wooyoung waved his hand. “We think watching us do a scene might be helpful. There aren’t really any good or active clubs that I can safely recommend to you for demos. We’d just do something simple, like some edging and overstimulation.”

“You want me to watch?” Hongjoong asked, looking at him in surprise.

“Yeah,” Wooyoung said with a nod. “San isn’t as masochistic as Seonghwa, but it’s still good to see dynamics and techniques for other subs, you know?”

Hongjoong nodded a few times. He didn’t want to give up the opportunity to watch the couple. Not only was he likely to learn something, but they were hot. He wasn’t expecting to be added into the scene, but he had no doubt he’d enjoy the show.

“Sannie is a bit of an exhibitionist, so I know he’s always looking for excuses to show off,” Wooyoung laughed. “But why wouldn’t I want to show him off, you know?”

“I get it,” Hongjoong said with a nod.

He wanted to say he’d show off Seonghwa, but he bit his tongue. Seonghwa wasn’t his to show off, and Hongjoong knew that if he was, he’d want to keep him closer than that. A private treasure, all to himself.

“You don’t need to decide right away,” Wooyoung said with a shrug.

“I just need to ask Seonghwa and Yeosang if they’re okay with it,” Hongjoong replied. “I’m good. I just don’t want to upset anyone.”

“Very thoughtful of you,” Wooyoung said with a smile. “Also, Sannie wanted me to give you this.”

“I can take care of myself,” Hongjoong said, eyeing the bag Wooyoung placed on the table. “I’m not nineteen. I can cook for myself and everything.”

Wooyoung laughed brightly. “It makes him happy. Just take the snacks and bring the bag and containers back with the other one on Saturday.”

“Thank you,” Hongjoong said with a small laugh. “Sorry I’ve been a mess since Friday.”

“You could have called me sooner,” Wooyoung shrugged. “I like you, Hongjoong. I want to be your friend, and having someone to talk to about stuff like Dom drop, especially when you don’t know what’s going on, is important.”

Hongjoong nodded and wondered if he’d get to keep Wooyoung and San when Seonghwa was done with him. The couple had quickly wormed their way into his life without him really realizing it. He also needed to talk to Yeosang seriously about their new friendship. He wasn’t going to risk the bond he had with Yeosang just to keep them.

“Okay, I think we both need to get back to work now,” Wooyoung yawned with a stretch. “These kids are rough today.”

“My kids aren’t much better,” Hongjoong laughed as he stood. He took the bag and frowned at it. “Does this need to go in a fridge?”

“He put freezer packs in it,” Wooyoung shrugged. “San’s really good at all that domestic stuff.”

“Yeah, but it’s your cooking,” Hongjoong pointed out.

Wooyoung smiled brightly. “It is. We’re a great team.”

“Yeah, I’m leaving before you keep going. We get it, you’re in love with your husband,” Hongjoong said, rolling his eyes but smiling at Wooyoung as he waved goodbye.

Hongjoong felt lighter through the second half of his day. He didn’t miss the way Yeosang eyed the bag he was carrying, though. There was no way he could put off the talk they needed to have. Hongjoong wasn’t willing to ever do anything that would hurt Yeosang. They had been friends too long, and they were great partners at work.

“Hey, can I talk to you about something before we leave?” Hongjoong asked as Yeosang was switching the lights off.

“Sure?” Yeosang looked at him. “It’s about them, right?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded.

“Did they ask you to join them or something?” Yeosang asked in a harsh tone.

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Nothing physical. Wooyoung asked me if I wanted to watch them do a scene, but I wasn’t going to say yes unless you and Seonghwa didn’t care.”

“I don’t know,” Yeosang shrugged. “I don’t think I care, not really. It’s just complicated. Everything reached a natural stopping point last week, and I’m just kind of lost.”

Hongjoong frowned. “Are you okay?”

“Maybe? I know I will be eventually,” Yeosang said, looking down as he leaned back against the wall behind him. “They’re great. I mean, you already know that. It’s weird to see you just be friends with them. I’ve never met the girls. I just know they exist. I’ve never even been in their house. They were really good at separating things.”

“It hurts when things end, even if you know they’re going to,” Hongjoong commented. He couldn’t help but think about what Wooyoung had said to him earlier that day. Maybe Wooyoung had given him that advice to remind him of it.

“They didn’t do anything wrong either,” Yeosang laughed. “They’re so great. Wooyoung is so fun and he’s great to banter with. Same with San, he’s just a little bit gentler. It was just time to stop, you know?”

Hongjoong nodded. He knew Yeosang wasn’t done talking yet; he was just finding the right words.

“They said they wanted to be friends,” Yeosang laughed. “Like, I was literally inside his husband three minutes before that, and then Wooyoung is telling me they don’t want to hook up anymore, but they want to build a platonic friendship. What kind of shit timing is that?”

“Humans make mistakes,” Hongjoong said quietly.

Yeosang groaned. “I know, and I do want to be friends, just not right now. How are you supposed to be friends with people you had that kind of connection with? For me, it was hard not to give a piece of myself away. I think your guy is the only other third they’ve ever brought in, so it was special.”

Hongjoong nodded and ignored the way his stomach twisted when Yeosang called Seonghwa his guy.

“It’s just complicated and messy right now,” Yeosang said, closing his eyes. “I don’t care if you watch them, I don’t care if you’re friends with them either. I just might not want to talk about it until I’m ready. Is that okay?”

“Sangie, I’m not going to ever do anything that’s going to hurt you, so just say the word and I’ll back off completely,” Hongjoong said firmly.

“It’s okay,” Yeosang said, opening his eyes. “I promise. I’ll eventually be friends with them. I kind of set myself up for this anyway. We had clear boundaries, and I got a little too comfortable and let myself live in it a little too much.”

“I get that,” Hongjoong nodded. “I hope you can be friends though.”

Yeosang nodded. “Me too. I’ve been texting San a little bit, just about work and stuff. They might want to have me over to eat and see if we can all do the just-friends thing.”

“Their house is chaotic,” Hongjoong warned with a laugh.

“I can only imagine,” Yeosang laughed. “I just need to take small steps to reframe that whole relationship.”

“Go as slow as you need. They’ll get it,” Hongjoong said with a nod. He didn’t know Wooyoung and San that well, but he knew he was right. “And you can always talk to me about this stuff.”

“I know,” Yeosang nodded. “You’ve just been really down and kind of angry lately. Before the Seonghwa stuff and all of this week. I didn’t want to add more to your mental load.”

Hongjoong made a face at himself. “I just want a relationship, and I don’t want to compromise the things I want to have one because it won’t last. It just gets frustrating.”

“Are things okay with Seonghwa?” Yeosang asked carefully.

“We’re figuring it out,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Last week was really good, but I made some mistakes that hurt me mentally a little bit. I know what they are, though.”

Yeosang nodded. Hongjoong knew he didn’t totally understand, but Yeosang didn’t have to. They had been friends long enough to support each other without the details being important.

“You’re good though?” Yeosang pushed off the wall.

“I am. Are you?” Hongjoong took a step toward the door.

“Getting there,” Yeosang shrugged.

“I’ll take it,” Hongjoong said, letting out a little laugh.

He stood awkwardly until Yeosang took another step forward and wrapped him in a quick but tight hug.

**

By the next day, the heaviness that had hung over Hongjoong had lifted just enough for him to feel normal about his meeting with Seonghwa. It was obvious that he had to talk about the Dom drop, but he wasn’t sure how Seonghwa would react. Wooyoung had said he didn’t need much aftercare, but Hongjoong was itching to pamper and softly worship Seonghwa.

He had no issues being rough with the other man, even marking him up, but Hongjoong needed Seonghwa to know he was precious. He wanted Seonghwa to understand that he did those things because Seonghwa wanted them. He also wanted them himself, but that wasn’t the point.

Hongjoong had always thought of himself as a pleasure Dom, but Seonghwa was already teaching him that pleasure came in many different forms.

This time, when Hongjoong came face to face with Jongho, he was a little more put together. The second coffee he was holding was for the younger man, along with his own sweet treat.

“You don’t have to suck up to me,” Jongho frowned.

“I’m not sucking up,” Hongjoong rolled his eyes. “I’m being nice.”

“Okay.” Jongho nodded, and Hongjoong thought he won, but it only lasted a moment. “You don’t need to be nice to me either.”

Hongjoong let out a strained laugh. “Just say thank you.”

“Thank you,” Jongho deadpanned, but he picked up the coffee and took a sip anyway.

The sip was enough of a reward for Hongjoong, and he couldn’t help but smile. “Should I see myself back to Seonghwa’s office?”

“Hold on.” Jongho held up a finger before picking up his phone. “Sir Hongjoong is here.”

There was a pause, and Jongho nodded. He hung up the phone and looked at Hongjoong as he took another sip of his coffee.

“You can go back,” Jongho nodded. “For future reference, muscat grape is my favorite for pastries, and then lemon.”

“Noted,” Hongjoong said with a laugh.

The walk down the hallway to Seonghwa’s office felt quick. Hongjoong noted right away that the blinds on the large windows were already shut. It might be dumb to do anything with a dynamic at Seonghwa’s job, given how high his standing was, but Hongjoong didn’t want to move their meetings to another location. He also suspected that Seonghwa liked to feel naughty. Plus, the door was locked. Seonghwa only had to stand and unlock it. No one would question how his chair was positioned to the side.

Hongjoong used the back of his hand to gently knock on the door, then opened it and stepped inside. He didn’t see Seonghwa immediately, but he noticed the chair was already turned to the side. He smiled and shifted his gaze to see a composed and poised Seonghwa standing off to the side.

“Hello, Seonghwa,” Hongjoong said, setting the coffee and the bag with a pastry on his desk. “What’s the deal with Jongho?”

Seonghwa’s facade cracked as he smiled and giggled a little. “He’s a softie. He’s just a pain in the ass too.”

“What does he do?” Hongjoong asked. “Is he reception?”

“Technically reception and one of my assistants,” Seonghwa smiled. “He’s my favorite, but don’t tell anyone that. The assistants watch the desk when we don’t have them doing other things.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong nodded.

“We like to feel small even though we’re a very large company,” Seonghwa explained. “Something about company culture.”

“Sounds like making the lower employees grind so the company can get more work out of fewer employees,” Hongjoong shrugged.

“Company culture,” Seonghwa repeated with a smile.

Hongjoong let out a breathy laugh. “I’m sure you’re a great boss though, aren’t you, Sir?”

The look of abject horror that passed over Seonghwa’s face was worth the comment. Hongjoong had expected a blush, not a look of disgust.

“Oh,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I didn’t like that at all.”

“I’m only teasing,” Hongjoong said, shaking his head. “I did bring you something though.”

Seonghwa perked up at that. Hongjoong wasn’t sure if he was going to be excited once he saw the gift, but he knew he’d have to treat the other man to something else soon if he got that excited over something so small.

With a little difficulty, Hongjoong pulled a plush, deep-purple satin pillow out of his bag. Seonghwa’s already big eyes went wider, and his mouth popped open.

“You should be comfortable,” Hongjoong explained.

“Thank you, Sir,” Seonghwa said, giving him a bow.

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa bent to set the pillow on the floor before dropping to his knees on it. Seonghwa shifted slightly to get the best position, then his eyes traveled back to Hongjoong, who was just standing and watching his submissive. He could watch Seonghwa all day.

“We do have a few serious things to talk about,” Hongjoong said, setting his bag by the door. “But I have a question first.”

Seonghwa nodded silently.

“Are you wearing lingerie right now?” Hongjoong asked. He didn’t know why, but he guessed that Seonghwa was.

Seonghwa nodded again as Hongjoong finally sat down.

“Don’t get shy now,” Hongjoong laughed. “It’s a shame I can’t see.”

Seonghwa smiled devilishly, and Hongjoong couldn’t wait to find out what he was going to say.

“If you get my phone, you can see,” Seonghwa nodded. “I also fell asleep last night before I could send you a picture. I have that for you too.”

Hongjoong turned to the desk a little too quickly, trying to look cool. He brushed off Seonghwa’s quiet laugh and grabbed the other man’s phone. It was easy enough to find, with the shiny case that looked like liquid metal.

“There’s a picture from Sunday and Monday too,” Seonghwa added as he took his phone.

“Oh?” Hongjoong frowned. “You can’t follow simple instructions? And I thought you didn’t masturbate much.”

Seonghwa’s cheeks went pink. “I never have, not really, until now.”

Hongjoong desperately wanted to push at that comment and find out more, but he decided to leave it for his own sanity.

“Send me the pictures, and then show me everything starting from Sunday,” Hongjoong said, leaning forward slightly.

It was quiet while Seonghwa texted him, and Hongjoong felt his phone vibrate in his pocket when the text was finally sent. He was happy to have his own masturbation material. It would help when he needed to get himself off before their scene later in the week.

“Sunday,” Seonghwa said, holding his phone up.

Hongjoong inhaled at the sight of Seonghwa’s nude torso. His tan skin was painted with white stripes of cum. Hongjoong wanted to ask what Seonghwa had thought about as he got off, but he knew the man would be honest, and he didn’t want to know if Seonghwa had fantasies that didn’t involve him. He waved his hand, indicating for Seonghwa to go to the next picture.

“Monday,” Seonghwa said.

This time, Seonghwa was sitting down, maybe on his couch. His pants and briefs were pulled down to his thighs. His spent cock was still thick against the crease between his thigh and abdomen, but wet splotches of cum dotted his white dress shirt.

“Dirty boy,” Hongjoong commented.

Seonghwa pulled the phone back himself and swiped to the next day. He held what Hongjoong assumed was last night’s session up and looked away from Hongjoong, towards the blinds on his glass windows.

“Oh, bunny,” Hongjoong cooed.

The picture was just of Seonghwa’s crotch. Again, his cock was still thick with a messy tip after cumming, and Hongjoong did enjoy the view of the cum pooled in Seonghwa’s bellybutton. But the star of the picture was the bright pink dildo peeking out from under Seonghwa’s smooth balls.

“Did you need to be full?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes, Sir,” Seonghwa squeaked out an answer.

“Show me how pretty you look under that nice suit now,” Hongjoong said, reaching out to pat Seonghwa’s head. He didn’t need to linger on the pictures. They were already on his phone, and he could look whenever he wanted.

Seonghwa nodded and swiped his phone again without looking. Hongjoong couldn’t help the little groan that escaped the back of his throat. It was clear that Seonghwa had spent time curating his collection of lingerie, and Hongjoong still itched to know if the bras were made specifically for him.

This time, Seonghwa was standing, dressed in a deep red matching set in front of a full-length mirror that Hongjoong assumed was in his bedroom.

“You’re so beautiful, Seonghwa,” Hongjoong commented. “And you matched your panties and bra to your tie. So cute.”

Seonghwa’s blush deepened in color.

“Thank you again for sharing that side of yourself with me,” Hongjoong said. “It’s important that you feel safe with me, and this lets me know I’m doing a good job making you feel like you can be yourself.”

“Yes, Sir,” Seonghwa squeaked.

“Okay,” Hongjoong smiled. “Give me the phone. We need to talk about a few things now.”

Seonghwa handed the phone over. “Am I in trouble, Sir?”

“You didn’t listen,” Hongjoong commented. “At all, actually. But I already have an idea in mind for a punishment for that. We’ll talk about it Friday.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa nodded. It was easy to tell he was getting nervous.

“So, Wooyoung and San have offered to let me watch them have a scene,” Hongjoong started.

Seonghwa scoffed and rolled his eyes.

“What?” Hongjoong laughed.

“They’re so horny,” Seonghwa made a face.

“Says the man that touches himself every night,” Hongjoong reminded him.

Seonghwa shut his mouth.

“Anyway,” Hongjoong continued, “I wanted to make sure you’re comfortable with that before I do it. I already checked with Yeosang, and he said it was okay.”

“It’s okay with me as long as anything with them doesn’t interrupt our meetings,” Seonghwa answered.

“Nothing will ever get in the way of my time with you,” Hongjoong said with a smile. Now came the harder part. “So, now we have to talk about aftercare.”

Seonghwa nodded. “I’ve never needed a lot. Sometimes I just drop like a rock, but normally I’m fine right after.”

Hongjoong sighed. “Apparently, I’m not.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa nodded and sat back a little. “What do you need?”

“I’m not totally sure,” Hongjoong answered honestly. “I left too soon. I wanted you to need me more. I hardly cleaned you up. I guess I want to pamper you a little after, let you relax, clean you up better, rub any areas that might be sore.”

Seonghwa nodded as Hongjoong spoke.

“Is that something you’re comfortable with?” Hongjoong asked. “We can always just hang out on the couch afterward and talk if that’s better. I just felt like I didn’t really know if you were okay.”

“We can spend more time together,” Seonghwa said firmly. “You can run me a bath or shower with me if you want to. I also love massages. I just might fall asleep if you make me cum as hard as you did last time, every time.”

Hongjoong laughed. “That’s the goal. But also, I didn’t do much to make you cum. You did that all on your own.”

“Yeah, but you—” Seonghwa started, then closed his mouth.

“Good boy,” Hongjoong laughed again. “Don’t fight with me.”

Seonghwa let out a huff, and Hongjoong was delighted by the reaction. What a little brat, pretending to be so tough. Hongjoong knew better now. He knew he could make Seonghwa fold with just a few words if he really wanted to.

“So, the next scene,” Hongjoong said, getting Seonghwa’s attention back on him. “I don’t want to push too far. What do you think?”

“I want more,” Seonghwa stated simply.

“What kind of more?” Hongjoong leaned forward until his elbows were on his knees, nearly face to face with Seonghwa. The other man held his gaze, and Hongjoong couldn’t help the quiet thrill that went through him. Seonghwa was such a good boy.

“Choking,” Seonghwa said clearly. “You can hit or step on my cock more too. And mark me more.”

“Oh?” Hongjoong smiled. “Mark you more?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “Obviously in places clothes can hide, but I’d like that.”

“What about toys? Do you have a plug?” Hongjoong asked.

Seonghwa furrowed his eyebrows. “Of course I have a plug.”

Hongjoong laughed. “Okay. Maybe I’ll have to see your toy collection someday.”

“We can do that,” Seonghwa nodded.

“Are you comfortable with me leading, just going off of those kinks?” Hongjoong leaned back again.

“Of course I am,” Seonghwa nodded, his brows still dipping closer together in a frown.

“Hey,” Hongjoong reached out and lightly tapped Seonghwa’s cheek with two fingers. “Don’t push too far.”

Seonghwa’s body immediately relaxed, but he hung his head in shame.

“I want you to have a towel, lube, and a plug ready for us on Friday,” Hongjoong started. “Then I want you to have wipes out, and something cozy to change into in the bathroom.”

“Yes, Sir,” Seonghwa nodded.

“And keep wearing pretty little things under your suits for me,” Hongjoong smiled.

“I ordered more,” Seonghwa whispered. “The company uses my measurements, so everything fits, but it’s embarrassing to call them.”

“Call them?” Hongjoong questioned.

“It’s a boutique in the city that’s queer-friendly,” Seonghwa breathed out. “They have lines for men, but I pay to have things tailored to my measurements.”

“I thought so,” Hongjoong smiled and nodded. “We’ll make sure you get some use out of your collection.”

It took all of Hongjoong’s self-control not to thank Seonghwa again for sharing that side of himself. It was clear that Seonghwa felt some shame about it, but Hongjoong had no issues proving him wrong. He also wasn’t sure if Seonghwa was getting off on the embarrassment or not.

It wasn’t the right time to mention it, but he kept Seonghwa’s panties under his pillow like a creep. Hongjoong had held himself back so far, but all he wanted was to wrap the soft fabric around his cock while he jerked off. Maybe he’d finally give in that night.

“I think that’s it for today, then,” Hongjoong nodded and shifted in his seat. “Unless you have anything to add.”

“No, Sir,” Seonghwa shook his head.

Neither moved.

After a few quiet moments, Hongjoong reached out and tapped Seonghwa’s head. “Pretty boy, you can get up and get back into boss mode now.”

Seonghwa looked up at him with bright eyes, and Hongjoong resisted the urge to bend down and place a soft kiss on Seonghwa’s plush lips. It had been something he thought about often, but he respected that some people were weird about kissing if their arrangement wasn’t romantic.

There was nothing romantic between him and Seonghwa.

Hongjoong saw Seonghwa shift, and he stood quickly before the other man could. He reached a hand down for Seonghwa to use to steady himself as he stood.

“Thank you,” Seonghwa smiled.

“You’ve got old knees; we have to keep them in good shape,” Hongjoong teased.

Seonghwa frowned and shoved Hongjoong’s shoulder playfully. “That was extremely rude.”

“Just thinking of my elders,” Hongjoong smiled.

“Yeah, you can go now,” Seonghwa grumbled.

Hongjoong’s smile turned into a laugh.

“Don’t laugh, I’ll tell Wooyoung to take back his offer,” Seonghwa pouted and crossed his arms over his chest.

Hongjoong wanted to kiss the pout.

He needed to leave.

“Okay, okay,” Hongjoong held up his hands. “Do you want me to take the pillow?”

“It’s my gift,” Seonghwa kept his pout. “You can’t take it back.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh more. “Okay, you can keep it here. I just didn’t know if you’d have issues explaining why there’s a pillow in your office.”

“I’ll be fine,” Seonghwa nodded.

“I’ll see you Friday?” Hongjoong asked as he picked up his bag.

“Yes, of course,” Seonghwa grumbled.

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong shook his head. “If you’re going to be a brat, you need to be able to take a little bit of teasing.”

“Get out,” Seonghwa pointed to the door, but the corners of his lips twitched into a smile.

“As you wish,” Hongjoong bowed and slipped out of the office.

Hongjoong couldn’t get the smile off his face as he headed home. Once on the subway, he pulled his phone out, intent on getting Seonghwa a gift to make up for his teasing. After a quick search, he found a flower shop that could deliver to Seonghwa’s office and was on his way home.

The train jerked to a stop, and Hongjoong skipped the escalator, bouncing up the stairs two at a time. The flower shop was a little out of his way, but it was worth it. He walked in and grimaced at the chime that sounded. An older woman popped up from behind the counter with a smile.

“Hello,” she waved. “Can I help you?”

“I wanted to get a bouquet for someone and have it delivered tomorrow,” Hongjoong shifted nervously.

“Is it for love?” she asked.

“What?” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide.

She laughed at him. “Sorry, most men are looking for love bouquets or ones to apologize. You looked like love.”

Hongjoong exhaled. “It’s more of a sorry. I teased them for being older and then made it sound like I wanted to take back a gift.”

“Okay, come here,” she said, leaving the counter to stand behind a cooler that had a few displays. “Do any of these look good?”

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. They were all too bright or too muted, though each had its own elegant charm.

“Right,” she nodded. “Let’s start at the beginning then. What color do you think of when you think of them?”

Immediately, the pink of Seonghwa’s blushing cheeks popped into his head. “Pink.”

She smiled and bent down. Hongjoong watched as she grabbed a few flowers out of the bottom of the cooler and set them on the counter. He had no idea what anything was beyond the long branches of eucalyptus. She quietly pulled a few more flowers out, light pinks with a few whites, and arranged them around each other, with the eucalyptus on the edges. It came together beautifully, and Hongjoong had no idea how she had managed to create something perfect with no information.

“White and peach anemone for love and passion,” she explained. “Solomio for charm and affection, but it also means my sun. Garden roses, we all know about those.” She moved her hand. “And peonies to sweeten it with more love and luck.”

“The eucalyptus?” Hongjoong questioned.

“To break up all the pinks,” she laughed and shook her head. “Is this okay?”

“I have no idea how you did that,” Hongjoong shook his head. “It’s beautiful.”

“Fifty years of doing it,” she smiled. “How big do you want it?”

“I don’t know,” Hongjoong frowned. “I really don’t know anything.”

“It shows,” she teased lightly. “We’ll go big, but not too much. Here, follow me.”

She moved to leave the counter. “Wait. Can I have the small one that you put together?”

“Of course,” she nodded and picked up the mini bouquet. “For you?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded.

“I’m not even going to ask if you have a vase,” she shook her head. “I’ll give you one on the house.”

“You don’t have to do that,” Hongjoong waved his hands at her.

“I want to,” she smiled. “Now come over here so I can get their address and take your money.”

Hongjoong laughed but followed the woman to the other counter. She produced a vase and plopped the small bouquet into it.

“Tomorrow is fine for the delivery. I’ll have it there around noon,” she said, poking at a keyboard attached to her register.

“That’s great, thank you,” Hongjoong nodded.

“Who are they for?” she smiled up at him.

Hongjoong swallowed roughly. Doing these things for another man wasn’t always acceptable, and older generations seemed even less tolerant.

“Park Seonghwa,” Hongjoong finally breathed out.

“Beautiful name,” she smiled as she typed, and the nerves left Hongjoong. “Address?”

Hongjoong rattled off the address and passed off his card without a second thought to the cost.

“And your name so I can address it? Did you want a message in the card?” she questioned.

“No,” Hongjoong waved his hand. “It doesn’t need a message.”

“It needs a message,” she pushed.

Hongjoong laughed. “Okay, maybe: ‘You’re my favorite new adventure’?”

“Barely acceptable, but sure,” she shook her head, and Hongjoong laughed again.

Soon he was pushing the door open to finally head home.

“Good luck with your man,” she called out. “He’ll have to forgive you for the old comment, but don’t take any more gifts back.”

“I won’t,” Hongjoong called back with a laugh before he walked out onto the street.

What Hongjoong wasn’t expecting was the immediate reaction the small bouquet he took home was going to have. He had only wanted the smaller version as a reminder of what Seonghwa was going to have. It was a little secret just for him.

“Did you bring us flowers?” Mingi froze mid-step.

“I brought me flowers,” Hongjoong answered.

“Why?” Mingi looked back at Yunho for help.

“Did someone die?” Yunho stood. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Hongjoong waved his hand. “I just thought it would be nice.”

“No, there’s more to this,” Yunho said.

Hongjoong hung his head and quickly decided if he should lie or not. “I got Seonghwa flowers because I teased him a little too much today. I just thought they were pretty and wanted to take the example home.”

“You got him flowers?” Yunho looked at Hongjoong dumbly.

“You’ve never gotten me flowers,” Mingi said to Yunho.

“Was I supposed to?” Yunho turned his attention to Mingi.

“Yes,” Mingi whined. “They’re not even dating, and Hongjoong is doing cute romantic things.”

Hongjoong took the bickering as his chance to slip into his bedroom. He set the flowers on his bedside table before reaching under his pillows for Seonghwa’s panties. Yes, tonight he was going to use them, and he’d bring them back to Seonghwa on Friday.

**

Seonghwa hadn’t texted about the flowers, and Hongjoong refused to be nervous about it. He trusted Seonghwa to tell him if he crossed a line, but he couldn’t help the sinking feeling that Seonghwa might have assumed it was from one of his dates. The message had been vague enough that it could have been from anyone. Seonghwa was an adventure, though, and the message had been sweet enough without being too over the top.

Had he messed up, though?

Hongjoong groaned to himself as the elevator came to a stop. Maybe he was nervous. He should have thought the gift over more carefully. They weren’t dating—gifts like that might have been inappropriate. Even more so after the talk they had about aftercare. Hongjoong was making things romantic. They didn’t need romance. They only needed communication and attraction.

“Hi, Joongie,” Seonghwa said as he pulled the door open. “Thank you for always being on time.”

Hongjoong smiled as he stepped into the entryway and shut the door. “You’re welcome. You’re lucky I’m not always early.”

“Don’t be too eager,” Seonghwa commented as he reached for Hongjoong’s bag.

“Hold on,” Hongjoong said, digging in his bag. A large bouquet of flowers on Seonghwa’s dining room table caught his eye. He panicked for a second, thinking they weren’t his—but they were.

He froze.

“Those were you, weren’t they?” Seonghwa asked quietly.

“Did I cross a line?” Hongjoong’s eyes stayed on the flowers.

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Not at all.”

“I made you pout so much, so I figured I’d say sorry even if you did look cute,” Hongjoong admitted.

“It was a nice surprise, I promise,” Seonghwa said with a smile that Hongjoong couldn’t see. “I would have left them at work, but I wanted to see them as much as I could before they wilted.”

Hongjoong nodded and continued digging through his bag. Finally, his fingers came in contact with the soft lace of the panties Seonghwa had told him to keep the week before.

“Do you have another gift for me?” Seonghwa asked, and Hongjoong couldn’t help but pick up on the hopeful tone.

“Kind of,” Hongjoong smirked and handed over the panties. He wasn’t completely sure how Seonghwa would deal with the article of clothing once he realized what it was, but it was worth the risk.

“What?” Seonghwa took the lace in his hands and frowned. “I said you could have these.” He turned them over in his hand, and the realization hit him. “Oh. You. Oh.”

“I appreciated them,” Hongjoong nodded.

“You did,” Seonghwa looked from the lace in his hand to Hongjoong. “I think this should be gross, but it kind of turns me on to think about you touching yourself with them.”

“I had them wrapped around my cock,” Hongjoong stated as he handed over his bag.

Seonghwa flushed slightly and nearly dropped the bag when Hongjoong handed it over. He waited patiently as Seonghwa tucked his bag away in the closet he now knew was there. His eyes went to the living room, and he was happy to see a towel, a bottle of lube, and a modest flesh-colored plug on the coffee table.

“Next time I choose the toy,” Hongjoong stated when Seonghwa returned.

“Is it not—” Seonghwa cleared his throat and looked over. “Is it not good enough, Sir?”

“I’m just willing to bet you can take something bigger, and that you have prettier ones,” Hongjoong said, looking at his feet and then to Seonghwa.

Without a word, Seonghwa went to his knees and quietly took Hongjoong’s shoes off, leaving him in his socks.

The lack of an answer was enough to let Hongjoong know he was right.

“If you’re ready to start, tell me your safe word,” Hongjoong said as he reached down to put his hand on Seonghwa’s head.

“Yellow is pause, red is stop,” Seonghwa looked up. “I pinch your leg if my mouth is full or if I can’t talk.”

“You can pinch my arm too,” Hongjoong added.

“Okay,” Seonghwa breathed out.

“Now strip,” Hongjoong took a few steps toward the living room.

He could feel the confidence settling in him. It was a welcome change from the last two scenes. Hongjoong had a loose idea of what he wanted to do with Seonghwa that night. It was just enough to have some structure, but also loose enough for wiggle room if he needed to pivot and do something different. It was the first time he was going into a scene fully confident.

When Hongjoong turned his attention back to Seonghwa, the man had already pulled his shirt off. Hongjoong was delighted to see a green silk bra with scalloped lace around the edges. He kept his comments to himself when Seonghwa pulled his socks off before tugging his lounge pants down. The panties were an exact match, and Seonghwa’s hardon strained lewdly against the fabric.

Hongjoong couldn’t wait to touch Seonghwa.

“Such a good boy, keeping everything neat,” Hongjoong said as he stepped forward. “And you got everything ready for me. I hope you remembered to put something to change into in the bathroom.”

“I did, Sir,” Seonghwa nodded.

Hongjoong hummed and licked his lips. He reached his hands out because he couldn’t resist anymore. One landed on Seonghwa’s stomach with fingers spread wide, and the other gripped Seonghwa’s hips. He dipped his head toward Seonghwa’s neck and ran his tongue up to his ear.

That was all Hongjoong was going to allow himself. No marks that people could see, but he could still leave them. His mouth went just under Seonghwa’s collarbone by his shoulder; he licked over the skin, bit it, and then sucked on the spot. These marks were just for them.

Seonghwa gasped, and Hongjoong gripped his side harder when his hips stuttered forward. Right now, Seonghwa just needed to take what Hongjoong was giving him, and Hongjoong wanted to play.

“Just take it, bunny,” Hongjoong murmured against Seonghwa’s skin.

He kissed down to Seonghwa’s pec, right where the muscle started to swell, and bit down as hard as he dared.

Seonghwa let out a loud whine that turned into a gasp, but he didn’t pull away.

“So good, so pretty,” Hongjoong said, just loud enough for Seonghwa to hear, as he lapped over the bite mark.

Hongjoong’s mouth went down further over the silk and focused on Seonghwa’s nipple. The man squirmed under him as Hongjoong sucked on the nub until the fabric was soaked. He moved his hand from Seonghwa’s stomach to his other nipple and smiled at the gasp he got when he pinched it.

“Do you like this, or are you just letting me play?” Hongjoong asked, pausing for a moment to remove Seonghwa’s bra.

“I like it, Sir,” Seonghwa said, looking down to see the bite mark.

“Thought so,” Hongjoong nodded.

His mouth went to Seonghwa’s other pec, this time closer to his armpit. Hongjoong knew the area was more sensitive, so he took his time, sucking and running his tongue over the impossibly soft skin.

“Sir,” Seonghwa moaned.

“I know, baby, but you’re just so pretty I can’t help myself,” Hongjoong said, looking down at the mark he had made.

Hongjoong smiled before leaning in again, letting his teeth run from Seonghwa’s collarbone to the line where his bra had left an indentation. This time, he bit down harder, holding Seonghwa’s waist firmly as he sucked the same spot.

There was no way Seonghwa could be intimate with anyone else now. They’d see clear evidence that he was with someone else. The idea made Hongjoong’s head spin. All he could think was mine as he dropped to his knees.

“Sir?” Seonghwa said in a panicked tone.

Hongjoong paused and realized Seonghwa was likely embarrassed at the wet spot now staining his panties.

“Oh, you do like this,” Hongjoong teased.

“I wouldn’t lie, Sir,” Seonghwa answered as his breathing picked up.

Hongjoong watched Seonghwa’s abdomen rise and fall with each rough breath. He couldn’t help the dumb smile spreading across his face. This time, when he moved forward, he used his tongue to trace along the lines of Seonghwa’s abs. Every so often, he’d stop to sloppily suck a spot, but never with any real intention.

When he reached Seonghwa’s stomach, Hongjoong couldn’t stop himself from biting the soft skin there. His tongue worked over the area in his mouth, eliciting a pleased noise from him.

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa gasped.

“Color?” Hongjoong asked, pulling back and eyeing the mark he had just made.

“Green,” Seonghwa answered quickly.

Hongjoong suspected the quicker Seonghwa answered, the more impatient he was feeling.

“That’s good,” Hongjoong murmured. “You’re so smooth. Do you wax, or is it all lasered off?”

“Lasered off,” Seonghwa replied, still looking down at Hongjoong.

“Spread your legs,” Hongjoong said, slapping Seonghwa’s thigh.

Seonghwa slid his legs apart, and Hongjoong wasted no time dipping his head between them to bite at Seonghwa’s inner thigh.

“Stay still, bunny,” Hongjoong coached.

By the time he was done sucking a deep purple mark into Seonghwa’s inner thigh, the submissive was shaking. Even though he was truly enjoying himself, Hongjoong knew it was time to move along. Hopefully, he’d have more opportunities to mark Seonghwa up.

“Go get the lube and your toy, then come back,” Hongjoong said, slapping the outside of Seonghwa’s thigh again.

Seonghwa jumped at the action and moved to grab the items. While he was distracted, Hongjoong picked the bra up from the floor and tossed it on top of Seonghwa’s neat pile of clothing. Then his attention returned to Seonghwa. The marks across his body only added to how beautiful he was.

“You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen,” Hongjoong commented. “My bunny, so pretty.”

Seonghwa smiled and handed over the lube and toy.

“Stay in position, pretty boy—legs spread,” Hongjoong said, setting the toy on the floor and flipping the cap on the lube. “Sadly, it’s time to take your pretty panties off.”

It was hard to ignore Seonghwa’s cock as it came into view, but Hongjoong stayed on task. When Seonghwa successfully stepped out of the garment, Hongjoong tucked it away in the pocket of his jeans before adjusting his own cock. Yes, he was hard, but it was easier to ignore his desire than he ever thought it would be. Sure, he’d like Seonghwa gagging on his cock, but right now he wanted to see if Seonghwa could stay standing while getting fingered.

Hongjoong picked the bottle of lube back up and squirted some onto two of his fingers. Without warming the liquid, he spread it from Seonghwa’s balls to his hole before adding more. Hongjoong didn’t know what Seonghwa’s prep for scenes looked like, but he was confident Seonghwa could take two fingers. It was likely he could take the plug without much prep either, but Hongjoong was having too much fun to skip prepping Seonghwa.

“Be a good bunny,” Hongjoong reminded Seonghwa.

Then, without much warning, Hongjoong reached between Seonghwa’s legs and watched as his fingers were swallowed up by Seonghwa’s greedy hole.

“Oh God,” Seonghwa cried out as his knees buckled.

“Stay standing like a good boy,” Hongjoong cooed. “Be a good bunny for me.”

Seonghwa let out another cry as Hongjoong began thrusting his fingers. His movements weren’t targeted, but the stretch was enough to have Seonghwa struggling to remain upright. The submissive’s knees bent dangerously, and Hongjoong decided to test just how good Seonghwa could be.

His mouth settled high on Seonghwa’s thigh.

“No, no, no,” Seonghwa shook his head.

Hongjoong froze, waiting for a color, but all he got was Seonghwa’s hand in his hair. He let it happen and began fingering him again. This time, he ignored the tiny chants of no slipping out of Seonghwa as he sucked on the skin under his lips.

Eventually, Seonghwa crumpled to his knees, eye to eye with Hongjoong.

“Grind down,” Hongjoong said simply.

Seonghwa rolled his hips and cried out.

There was no way Hongjoong could sustain the pressure on his wrist, but it gave him a good idea for their next scene. He used his free hand to grab the plug before letting his fingers slide out of Seonghwa’s body. The bottle of lube slipped out of his hand twice before he managed to pour some over the toy.

They needed the towel, but he wasn’t stopping.

Hongjoong brought the plug between Seonghwa’s legs and pushed until he felt Seonghwa’s body start to give way.

“Sir,” Seonghwa’s mouth dropped open.

“Yes, bunny?” Hongjoong said lowly as he continued pushing the plug further in.

“Full,” Seonghwa moaned.

“Baby, the toy isn’t that big,” Hongjoong laughed. “You’re not full. I know you can take so much more. Can’t you?”

Seonghwa nodded a few times. “Yes, Sir.”

“If you can’t take more, then I’d never fit inside of you,” Hongjoong dared to say.

“I can take you,” Seonghwa answered quickly. “Sir.”

Hongjoong let out a breathy laugh. The plug was at its widest part. Without thinking, he leaned forward and bit down on Seonghwa’s trap as the toy finally slid past the widest point, and Seonghwa’s body easily accepted the rest.

“Is it good?” Hongjoong asked as he sat back up.

“Not enough,” Seonghwa whined, wiggling his hips.

Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh. Was he that far gone?

“Baby, I thought it was enough,” Hongjoong laughed more. “You just said you were full.”

“No, no,” Seonghwa shook his head. “More.”

Seonghwa’s eyes were wide and glassy as he spoke. He was gone, lost in some other place, and Hongjoong couldn’t help but feel proud. It was also a good indication that they needed to move things along, but he didn’t want to ruin Seonghwa’s carpet. Hongjoong stood and turned toward the table where the towel was. He froze when Seonghwa let out a long, almost pained whine.

“I’ll be right back,” Hongjoong said softly. “We don’t want to ruin your pretty carpet.”

This time, when Seonghwa whined, Hongjoong rolled his eyes. He was only gone a few seconds before he returned and laid the fluffy towel over the carpet.

“Get on the towel,” Hongjoong pointed. “Right on the edge, not in the middle.”

Seonghwa looked at him for a moment before nodding. Hongjoong’s breath caught in his throat when Seonghwa fell forward and crawled to his new position. He watched, hand squeezing his cock through his pants, as Seonghwa paused before sitting up and spreading his knees again.

“Do you feel good?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “Cock?”

Hongjoong swallowed hard. “Not right now.”

“Please?” Seonghwa’s mouth dropped open.

“No,” Hongjoong said weakly. He wasn’t ready for this.

Seonghwa wasn’t even really begging yet, but Hongjoong was ready to throw his plan out the window.

“But, Sir,” Seonghwa’s bottom lip popped out in a pout.

“How about I step on your pretty cock?” Hongjoong offered. “It’s been leaking this whole time.”

Seonghwa nodded absently and closed his mouth. Hongjoong smiled fondly. Right now, in this moment, he could truly do whatever he wanted to Seonghwa, and the other man would likely thank him. It was a trust he wasn’t going to abuse.

Slowly, Hongjoong moved to stand in front of Seonghwa. He reached his foot out and pressed it against Seonghwa’s cock.

“Oh, fuck,” Seonghwa hissed.

Hongjoong noted the reaction and quickly realized Seonghwa was teetering on the edge. He’d have to draw things out as long as possible. Hongjoong changed the angle of his foot, and Seonghwa dropped his hips further. Hongjoong was thankful for the action because it allowed him to press Seonghwa’s cock down against the floor.

Seonghwa’s cock felt hot under his foot, and Hongjoong was surprised at how easy it was to press down. Each change in pressure made Seonghwa cry out, and he only stopped when Seonghwa reached out to grab his leg. Hongjoong waited to feel a pinch, but it never came. He pressed firmer and backed away when Seonghwa let out a strangled cry.

Hongjoong stood with his hands on his hips, looking down at Seonghwa as the submissive caught his breath. Seonghwa needed to calm down enough for what Hongjoong wanted to do next. Once they started, Seonghwa could cum as quickly as he wanted to.

This time, when Seonghwa looked up at him, his eyes seemed ready to spill over with tears. Hongjoong wanted to push, wanted to see it, but he knew better. They had a plan.

Seonghwa wanted to be choked.

Hongjoong leaned down, grabbed the lube again, and kneeled in front of Seonghwa, taking a deep breath.

“Give me your hand,” Hongjoong ordered quietly.

Seonghwa held out his hand, and Hongjoong poured lube over his fingers. Seonghwa looked confused, but he’d understand soon enough.

“Do you still want me to choke you?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes, green,” Seonghwa nodded. “Please, yes.”

“Okay, okay,” Hongjoong chuckled.

He reached into his pocket for Seonghwa’s panties as he placed his other hand on Seonghwa’s sternum.

“You’re so soft,” Hongjoong marveled.

Seonghwa moaned in response, and Hongjoong let his hand slide further up toward Seonghwa’s neck. This was another area he was comfortable with; he knew exactly where to apply pressure without truly hurting him.

“You’re going to touch yourself until you cum,” Hongjoong started. “And I want you to cum all over your pretty panties.”

Seonghwa nodded obediently.

Hongjoong pressed the panties into Seonghwa’s free hand while his other hand wrapped around his cock. Seonghwa hissed at the sensation and closed his eyes.

“Make sure nothing gets on the floor,” Hongjoong warned. “I want every drop on that silk.”

He watched Seonghwa for a few moments before remembering why his fingertips were grazing Seonghwa’s neck. Hongjoong’s hand slid fully up, curling around Seonghwa’s throat. He applied only light pressure, letting it linger for what felt like an eternity before finally squeezing slightly.

A pretty whine escaped Seonghwa as he sped up his hand motions.

“Cum whenever you want, pretty boy. You earned it,” Hongjoong coached, continuing to apply gentle pressure. “So good for me tonight.”

He could feel Seonghwa’s pulse quicken as he neared the edge. Hongjoong watched closely, adjusting the pressure just enough.

Seonghwa’s whole body shook as he came into his panties. Hongjoong’s eyes went wide, taking in Seonghwa’s head thrown back and eyes rolled shut. He didn’t move until Seonghwa’s body went completely limp, then pulled him into a tight hug. He held him as long as Seonghwa needed.

“So good, Seonghwa,” Hongjoong whispered. “You’re so perfect and beautiful.”

“Did I spill?” Seonghwa mumbled weakly.

Hongjoong looked down, more to humor him than anything. “You didn’t.”

Seonghwa made a pleased noise, burying his face in Hongjoong’s neck. Hongjoong stilled, focusing on the way Seonghwa’s breathing slowly evened out. Despite Seonghwa being taller, he fit perfectly in Hongjoong’s arms. Hongjoong’s broad build and gym-toned frame contrasted with Seonghwa’s long, lean muscles.

Seonghwa shifted and whined slightly.

“Yes?” Hongjoong laughed lightly. “What is it?”

“You,” Seonghwa mumbled, pulling back.

“Me?” Hongjoong’s smile turned into a frown. “Did I do something wrong?”

“Oh my god, no,” Seonghwa sat up straight. “You didn’t get off.”

Hongjoong looked down at his lap, making a face. He wasn’t even hard anymore.

“I’m good,” he said. “I had fun.”

“You can’t just—” Seonghwa frowned deeply. “You can’t just make me feel that good and not let me help you.”

Hongjoong stared at him, unsure if this was a real problem. “I promise, I’m good. That was so fun and amazing for me.”

“You not cumming isn’t a punishment, is it?” Seonghwa sniffed.

Hongjoong’s eyes went wide. He had no idea how to follow Seonghwa’s emotions.

“No, it wasn’t,” Hongjoong said softly. “You were very good.”

“But I didn’t show you when I touched myself,” Seonghwa sniffled again.

“Don’t cry,” Hongjoong said sincerely. He had no idea how to deal with Seonghwa crying over something so small.

“You should punish me,” Seonghwa said, eyes suddenly wide.

Hongjoong realized he was being played.

“I told you I won’t do pain punishments with you,” he smiled, poking Seonghwa’s cheek. “You like them too much. You won’t like my punishments.”

Seonghwa’s face turned into an angry pout. Hongjoong laughed, relieved that he had read the situation correctly.

“I don’t like this,” Seonghwa leaned back and crossed his arms.

“Then consider it a punishment,” Hongjoong laughed. “But I’m still happy with how that scene went. I like learning your body.”

“You can’t,” Seonghwa started and stopped. “Fine.”

Hongjoong laughed as he stood. He held out his hands. After a few moments, Seonghwa uncrossed his arms and grabbed them, using Hongjoong’s support to pull himself up. Seonghwa swayed slightly, and Hongjoong wrapped an arm around his waist.

“Baby steps to the bathroom,” Hongjoong commented.

“Am I not even going to see your cock?” Seonghwa grumbled.

Hongjoong laughed loudly. “I was going to get in the shower with you.”

“And I can’t touch it?” Seonghwa clarified.

“No,” Hongjoong said firmly.

He realized he might be enjoying this moment a little too much. No one had ever begged for his cock or pouted to see it before. He figured it might be part of Seonghwa coming down from the scene, but Seonghwa was also a brat when he didn’t get his way. Hongjoong made a mental note to check on Wednesday whether this was a real issue. If holding back his cock felt like a punishment, he’d have to use it wisely.

“I do have a request, though, because you didn’t send me those pictures,” Hongjoong commented as he moved to the shower. “Wait. Why are there no knobs?”

“Let me show you,” Seonghwa smiled. “It’s easy.”

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa pressed the buttons on a panel on the wall. Moments later, a hot waterfall of water cascaded from a ceiling fixture.

“I’m never going to remember that,” Hongjoong laughed.

“This one turns it on,” Seonghwa pointed again. “And this one is the preset for my favorite setting.”

“I turn a knob at home,” Hongjoong replied.

“Well, now you’re here living the high life with me,” Seonghwa smiled.

If only.

“Anyway,” Hongjoong cleared his throat as he nudged Seonghwa toward the shower, “I think it’s obvious that I need to control when you get off.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa nodded.

Hongjoong wondered for a second if he had just been played. The look of pleased satisfaction on Seonghwa’s face suggested he might have fallen right into a trap.

“You know,” Seonghwa started, leaning back to get his hair wet, “I’ve never seen you naked. This will be the first time.”

“What?” Hongjoong looked up, panicked. He hadn’t thought about that.

“I’ve only seen your cock,” Seonghwa laughed. “I don’t even know if I’ve seen your balls.”

Hongjoong laughed nervously but paused. He wasn’t ashamed of his body, he worked out when he could, but he didn’t have the long lines and defined muscles that Seonghwa did.

“Are you shy?” Seonghwa tilted his head back briefly, then forward again. “You can just watch me wash myself if you are.”

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I just hadn’t thought about it.”

“I know you’re hot, Hongjoong,” Seonghwa said, stepping out of the water. “I can see your tits outlined through your shirts.”

His tits? Hongjoong swallowed roughly. He looked at the soaked bathmat and focused on the wet spot as he pulled off his tee.

Seonghwa let out a low whistle, moving closer to the shower to get a better look. Hongjoong resisted the urge to cover himself.

“If you hide yourself from me, I’m ending this now,” Seonghwa said seriously.

“I won’t,” Hongjoong assured him.

After a deep inhale, Hongjoong pulled off his pants and boxers in one motion, then his socks. He left the heap on the floor and stepped into the shower.

“You look better than I thought you would,” Seonghwa commented, reaching out to touch Hongjoong’s abdomen.

“Oh,” Hongjoong dipped his head under the water, hiding his blush. “Thank you.”

“This is very cute,” Seonghwa said, smiling. “A humble Dom. You’re like a puppy Dom.”

“A what?” Hongjoong laughed, glancing at the bottles on the shower shelf.

“Puppy Dom,” Seonghwa repeated. “You have this serious Dom mode where your cuteness disappears, but outside of that, you’re just a simp.”

“But you like it?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yeah,” Seonghwa sighed. “I like it a lot.”

“So I have no idea which of these four shampoos and seven body washes to use,” Hongjoong said, gesturing at the bottles.

“Purple shampoo,” Seonghwa pointed. “And I think the cherry body wash.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong picked up the shampoo. “You need to put your head back.”

Seonghwa stepped out of the water and obediently tilted his head back, just enough for Hongjoong to lift his arms comfortably. He worked the purple shampoo into Seonghwa’s hair, massaging his scalp gently.

“Why is it purple?” Hongjoong asked.

“It tones the blonde,” Seonghwa replied softly. “Feels good.”

“It’s supposed to,” Hongjoong laughed. “Why do you dye your hair?”

“I have gray hair, I have to cover it somehow,” Seonghwa said with a light laugh.

Hongjoong’s stomach warmed at the thought of Seonghwa with dark hair streaked with gray. “I don’t know, it doesn’t sound bad to me.”

“You’re a simp, that’s why,” Seonghwa laughed again. “And that’s fine. You’re a good Dom like that.”

“I am?” Hongjoong smiled. “You really think so?”

Seonghwa turned to him, serious despite the head full of purple bubbles. “Yes, and you continue to get better with every scene. I’ve never been this horny, and I can just trust you without worrying. You knew exactly when to stop applying pressure while choking me earlier. That’s insane. You just figured it out without ever having done it before.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong turned his gaze away.

“Yeah, oh,” Seonghwa poked his side. “You’re just kind of good at this. It’s insane no one gave you a chance before me.”

“I also didn’t give them a chance,” Hongjoong corrected. “There are a lot of weird people in the world.”

“At least I get to train you to be perfect for me,” Seonghwa grinned.

“Dip your head back again,” Hongjoong said, shaking his head. “Do I use the purple conditioner?”

“Yeah, it needs to sit for a little bit,” Seonghwa answered.

Hongjoong rinsed out the soap, then applied conditioner mostly to the ends of Seonghwa’s hair. He took his time, massaging Seonghwa’s scalp and enjoying the deep moans rumbling from his chest.

“Okay, let’s wash your body,” Hongjoong said, slowly pushing Seonghwa to face him again.

“Are the marks bad?” Seonghwa asked.

“I’m literally always going to say no to that question,” Hongjoong laughed. The marks had begun fading from red to deep purple, but he knew they’d likely be gone before their next scene.

“Possessive,” Seonghwa commented.

“Sometimes,” Hongjoong replied, grabbing body wash and squeezing some onto a cloth.

“I can be possessive too,” Seonghwa sighed as Hongjoong ran the cloth over his body. “Sometimes it’s bad, though. Like my last date—such a fail. He got mad at the waiter for smiling at me. How does that even make sense? We’re meeting for the first time, and I’m out with him. How does someone giving good customer service matter?”

Hongjoong swallowed the bitter taste at the reminder that Seonghwa was actively dating.

“I’m not looking forward to Sunday,” Seonghwa continued as Hongjoong circled around him to wash his back and between his legs. “It’s a guy a coworker recommended, so there’s extra pressure for it to go well. They said he was my type, but they don’t even know what that is.”

Hongjoong hummed, acknowledging him as he got on his knees to wash Seonghwa’s legs. Listening was easy; enjoying it was bittersweet. It reminded him of his place. Hongjoong was just a play partner, a young guy given a chance, nothing more.

“Apparently he likes Legos, which is cool,” Seonghwa added.

“What?” Hongjoong looked up, though all he could see was Seonghwa’s back.

“I like Legos,” Seonghwa said. “It’s relaxing to build them.”

“Can I see them?” Hongjoong swallowed. “Please?”

Seonghwa laughed. “Sure. I can show you before you leave.”

“Time to rinse off,” Hongjoong said, standing.

“Do you need to wash anything?” Seonghwa asked.

“I didn’t even take my clothes off, remember?” Hongjoong laughed.

Seonghwa nodded, stepping under the shower spray. Hongjoong dropped the cloth and ran his hands through Seonghwa’s hair, letting them slide down his arms and across the rest of his body. He was hard again, but determined to ignore it. How could he not be, with free range to touch Seonghwa?

“All done,” Hongjoong commented.

“Okay,” Seonghwa sighed, reaching for a towel. “I think you need to start bringing sweatpants or something to change into.”

“You might be right,” Hongjoong said, following him out of the shower and smiling as he accepted the towel.

“You don’t want to dry me off?” Seonghwa teased.

“Not tonight,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Maybe another time.”

“The Legos are in my bedroom and office,” Seonghwa said, smiling. “I had a display case in the office that got full, so I got a second one for in there. Some of the cuter ones are in my room.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile at Seonghwa’s excitement.

“We use big blocks with the kids to help with their development,” Hongjoong added.

“Are you calling me childish, Hongjoong?” Seonghwa gasped.

“A little,” Hongjoong grinned. “But it’s cute. Want help cleaning your living room?”

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I like the little ritual of it.”

Hongjoong nodded and pulled his clothes onto his damp body. Just uncomfortable enough to know he should listen next time and bring something more comfortable.

“Okay, come on,” Seonghwa grinned, nearly skipping out of the bathroom.

This was the first time Hongjoong saw a more childish, less professional side of Seonghwa. He tried not to be too fond, but it was impossible as Seonghwa dragged him into his bedroom.

“We can do scenes here too if you want,” Seonghwa started. “It’s not a forbidden zone. But here’s my little village. Do you know Animal Crossing?”

Hongjoong looked from the white-and-grey room to the colorful Lego houses on the dresser. “The game?”

“Yeah,” Seonghwa nodded. “They did a collab, and I had to get them. Right now, I’m just missing Blather’s museum collection and Goldie’s cozy house.”

Hongjoong made a mental note. The flowers went over well; maybe he could continue to spoil Seonghwa.

“Maybe I can show you my island someday,” Seonghwa smiled at him.

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “Show me the rest.”

Seonghwa clapped his hands. “The ones in the office are different.”

Hongjoong followed him silently across the apartment. Seonghwa moved so fast he didn’t get a chance to survey the damage in the living room.

When Seonghwa switched on the office light, Hongjoong was surprised. There were two nearly full display cases where he assumed bookcases should be, plus a completed figure propped carefully on a table in the corner.

“It’s all Star Wars?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yeah,” Seonghwa said shyly. “I like Star Wars.”

Hongjoong nodded. No real interest, but he could fake it for Seonghwa.

“The Millennium Falcon is kind of my prized possession right now,” Seonghwa pointed. “I’ve been trying to find an old-school Death Star, but everyone seems to be scammers.”

“It’s cute that we all get older just to have the money to indulge our childhood passions,” Hongjoong said with a smile.

“And what do you indulge in, Hongjoong?” Seonghwa asked.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Hongjoong flushed. “I have passions, but nothing like this. I do like playing pretend with the kids.”

“Wooyoung said you finished grad school,” Seonghwa mentioned.

“Do you guys talk about me that much?” Hongjoong laughed.

“Oh no,” Seonghwa waved his hands. “It just came up because he’s scheming to ask you parenting questions.”

“That’s fine,” Hongjoong laughed.

“Are you going to switch careers?” Seonghwa asked, moving toward the office door.

“Someday,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I like teaching right now, and working with one of my best friends is amazing. Eventually I’ll do more. I think maybe a PhD first, then eventually help with therapy for developmentally delayed or abused kids. Not exactly sure yet.”

Seonghwa nodded with a smile. “That’s admirable. I’m over here making sure people buy things that make them pretty.”

“Self-esteem is important,” Hongjoong added as they moved back toward the living room.

“Yes, but you can agree it’s a flawed industry.”

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa bent to tidy up their mess. He swallowed when Seonghwa picked up his soiled panties.

“It can be, but it can also be very helpful for a lot of people,” Hongjoong shrugged. “It just depends.”

“You’re very optimistic,” Seonghwa smiled, holding out the panties. “I assume you wanted these.”

Hongjoong nodded and took them.

“Let me get your bag,” Seonghwa laughed.

With a sigh, Hongjoong moved to the entryway. He still wanted to stay longer, but there was no real reason outside of his own selfish desires. Right now, he felt good. Seonghwa was back in himself, and Hongjoong didn’t feel the stinging need to linger like last time. Another scene successfully completed.

“Let me,” Seonghwa said, taking the panties back and tucking them into the front pocket of Hongjoong’s bag. “Don’t forget they’re there.”

“I won’t,” Hongjoong shook his head.

“If you use them,” Seonghwa started slowly, “can you tell me? Or show me?”

Hongjoong was surprised by the request but nodded. “I can do that. And remember—you need permission to cum now. Cock cages weren’t on your limits list, and I’ll figure it out if I have to.”

“I’ll be good,” Seonghwa grinned.

“That smile is scary, Seonghwa,” Hongjoong teased.

“You’ll be fine,” Seonghwa said as he crouched to help put Hongjoong’s shoes on.

“I’m not sure how I feel about my sub plotting against me,” Hongjoong laughed.

“I would never!” Seonghwa faked a gasp.

Hongjoong hummed in mock disagreement but couldn’t hide his smile. Seonghwa had trusted him tonight, shown him a new side of himself. They were moving forward with their bond, and that meant everything—even if it didn’t mean anything in the long run.

“Will you text me when you get home?” Seonghwa asked, standing. “Just so I know?”

“I can do that,” Hongjoong nodded. “Enjoy the cleanup.”

Seonghwa let out a dry laugh. “I will.”

Before Hongjoong even left the lobby, he pressed the screen on his phone before he held it to his ear. He silently prayed that Wooyoung would pick up.

“Hello?”

“I didn’t even cum,” he heard, followed by a bright laugh.

“I bet he’d suck you off if you went back,” Wooyoung teased.

“No, I didn’t need to,” Hongjoong said gleefully. “I was just satisfied getting him off.”

“Oh. Yeah, I get that.”

“How cool is that, though? To be hard and just not care? I didn’t even think about my dick at all,” Hongjoong rambled.

Wooyoung laughed again, a little too bright for the late hour.

“I got him flowers too, and he wasn’t mad,” Hongjoong continued. “And I might get him some Legos. Did you know he likes Legos?”

“Yes. And the guys he’s dating do too.”

That sobered Hongjoong up. He had to stop telling on himself.

“Anyway, everyone was cool with me watching you and San,” Hongjoong said, heading for the subway as a distraction.

“Is tomorrow too soon? We already have something planned. It’ll be easy to add you into the mix.”

“Tomorrow is fine,” Hongjoong said, pausing outside the stairwell leading down to the station.

“Rules are simple,” Wooyoung added. “You can’t touch, even yourself, and no talking, even if we mention you.”

“That’s easy,” Hongjoong nodded to himself, smiling.

“Okay. I’ll text you the time and the place. We don’t really like to play at home anymore.”

“You’re getting hotels weekly?” Hongjoong asked a little too loudly. He knew Seonghwa had money, but he hadn’t realized Wooyoung and San did too.

“We have an apartment in the city, and a dance studio,” Wooyoung explained.

“Oh, that makes sense,” Hongjoong breathed out.

“Okay, kid. Calm yourself down on the ride home and get some sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Don’t call me kid,” Hongjoong grumbled into the phone, but Wooyoung had already hung up.

**

As it turned out, Wooyoung and San’s city apartment was only three streets from Hongjoong’s. That gave him extra time to get mentally ready—but also extra time to worry. What if Yeosang wasn’t okay with this? Hongjoong wasn’t planning to bring it up at work on Monday, but Yeosang would know. And if he asked… Hongjoong needed a graceful way to brush it off.

When it was finally time to leave, he heard shuffling in the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” Yunho asked innocently.

“Friends,” Hongjoong shrugged, shoving his wallet into his pocket. He didn’t need much for this visit.

“You don’t have friends,” Yunho pointed out.

“I do now,” Hongjoong laughed.

“Do we get to meet these friends, or Seonghwa?” Yunho narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms.

“No, Appa, you don’t,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Not now anyway. Maybe years from now, if I still talk to them.”

Introducing Mingi and Yunho to Wooyoung and San? Chaos waiting to happen.

“Okay, well, have fun,” Yunho laughed.

“I will,” Hongjoong smiled and gave a thumbs-up before leaving the apartment.

Two doors down from Wooyoung and San’s place, a small shop specializing in jeon filled the street with a delicious aroma. Hongjoong knew the route so well he could walk it blindfolded. Maybe he’d pick some up on the way home for dinner.

After climbing a short staircase to their door, Hongjoong rang the bell and waited briefly.

“Hi Hongjoong,” Wooyoung greeted, his usual upbeat personality. “San’s already in the bedroom. He slipped into a more submissive space about half an hour ago. We didn’t start yet, but sometimes once he’s pulled out, he can’t go back in, so I just rolled with it.”

“That’s fine,” Hongjoong nodded, holding out the two canvas bags the couple had given him.

“Oh, you’re good at following instructions,” Wooyoung laughed.

“I just didn’t want to be rude,” Hongjoong replied with a roll of his eyes.

“So,” Wooyoung started as Hongjoong slipped on a pair of house slippers by the door, “when I say you’re here, you can say hi back to San if he talks. You cannot interrupt my scene, though. Later, you can ask why I did things if you have questions, but San is mine. I know what he can take and how far I can push. You’re not here to judge. Just watch, learn, maybe enjoy.”

Hongjoong nodded.

“There’s a good chance I’ll mention that you’re watching and ask him to be good because you’re here to impress you. Is that okay?”

“That’s fine,” Hongjoong swallowed. “That’s manageable.”

“And again, no touching yourself. This isn’t a threesome situation or anything like that,” Wooyoung waved his hand.

Hongjoong had to fight the urge to mention Yeosang. He didn’t want to ruin the mood.

“No touching myself. Got it,” he managed.

“You can also use a safe word if you need to. We use the traffic light system,” Wooyoung explained. “If you need to leave for any reason, just call yellow and walk out. I’ll check in afterward. I trust you’ll stay in a good headspace, and if you don’t, you’ll tell me.”

“Wooyoung, it’s just live porn,” Hongjoong smiled. “I’ll be okay.”

“Edging and overstimulation aren’t exactly controversial,” Wooyoung nodded. “And I won’t push him too far, but you never know how you’re going to react to things. He’s also tied to the bed, just so you know.”

Hongjoong nodded. He could not believe that San was behind one of the doors, naked, tied to a bed, waiting for them.

“I’m not using toys or anything other than lube either,” Wooyoung continued. “I think I can get him there three times before I have to let him go, but it might be less. I have to watch him and see. We haven’t done anything like this in a while.”

“Yeah, you need to watch how his body responds,” Hongjoong said. “I get that.”

“You ready?” Wooyoung finally asked.

“I’ve been ready since this morning,” Hongjoong laughed. “It was so hard to just sit around all day waiting.”

“Alright, come on,” Wooyoung moved. “It’s darker in there. I just have some candles lit, mood lighting, you know?”

“Sure,” Hongjoong nodded.

He had never considered any kind of mood lighting or darkening of the room when he was doing a scene. Hongjoong wanted to see every single inch of Seonghwa at all times.

When Wooyoung opened the door, Hongjoong realized he was wrong. San was there in the middle of the bed, his wrists and ankles tied down to the legs of the bed. It looked like Wooyoung knew what he was doing with the candlelight. San looked like liquid gold. His already tan skin glowed under the soft light, casting shadows over his body that accentuated every dip and swell of his muscles. San’s cock was on the small side, but it curved upwards so beautifully that Hongjoong’s mouth started to water.

“I know,” Wooyoung smiled. “Sannie baby, Hongjoongie is here to see how pretty you are.”

San lifted his head, and his eyes locked onto Hongjoong. In that moment, Hongjoong wanted to turn and walk away. He had only seen San smiling and playing with his family. This was a completely different person in front of him. San’s eyes were glossy in the same way Seonghwa’s had been during their last scene—not really subspace, but his mind was obviously cloudy.

A little soft oh fell out of San’s mouth before he laid his head back down. Hongjoong knew better than to say anything. He spotted a chair at the end of the bed, off to the side, and sat down in it. He crossed his legs and made eye contact with Wooyoung. They shared a nod, and Wooyoung smiled to himself before he spoke to his husband.

“You’re going to feel so good, Sannie.”

Hongjoong watched as Wooyoung wrapped a dry hand around San’s cock. Hongjoong would have used lube, but then again, this was Wooyoung’s scene, and he knew San better than Hongjoong ever would. The dry friction was likely part of the edging. The tactic was clear: go in uncomfortable, then make the slide easier, more pleasurable, so it was harder for the submissive to hold back. Hongjoong nodded to himself before he leaned forward.

It only took a few more twists of Wooyoung’s wrist for Hongjoong to realize that San wasn’t the only one being edged. His cock was straining uncomfortably against his jeans, and all he could think about was how good it would feel to press the heel of his hand against it, just to ease the pressure. But he wasn’t about to go against Wooyoung and San’s boundaries.

The couple got his attention again as Wooyoung poured praise onto San. Wooyoung was quiet and centered in a way that Hongjoong hadn’t seen before, and San was shameless with how he fell apart. His body was beautiful as he pulled against the cuffs around his wrists and ankles, his muscles tight with the tension of trying to hold back.

The first time Wooyoung pulled his hand away, San sat up as much as he could while he yelled no. Hongjoong had to bite back a laugh.

“So good,” Wooyoung cooed. “That’s it, just breathe. We’re going to go again, but you can’t cum yet, Sannie.”

Hongjoong smiled at the soft words as he watched Wooyoung stroke San’s chest. Wooyoung’s free hand reached out blindly for the bottle of lube that was nearby.

“I need you to be good for me,” Wooyoung continued to coach. “Hongjoongie is here. I want him to see how good you are. Can you be good for me?”

“Yes,” San breathed out quietly with his eyes squeezed shut.

“Good boy,” Wooyoung smiled as he let the lube dribble down onto San’s cock.

The reaction was instant. San’s hips twisted away from the cold liquid, and the whine he let out went straight to Hongjoong’s cock.

“Does it hurt yet, Sannie?” Wooyoung teased as he grabbed the shaft of San’s now hard cock.

The contrast of Wooyoung’s hand against San’s skin was beautiful. Nearly all of San’s length was covered by Wooyoung’s big hand, aside from the tip that was flushed a dark red. Hongjoong guessed that San could go two more times, but he didn’t know how forgiving Wooyoung was.

“I bet you already want to cum again, don’t you?” Wooyoung laughed lightly when San arched his hips off the bed.

“I can’t show you off if you ignore me and cum too soon,” Wooyoung shook his head. “What kind of example would that be? Don’t you want to show Hongjoongie how he should be treating Seonghwa? How Seonghwa should be good for him too?”

Hongjoong felt his whole body heat up at the mention of Seonghwa. He locked eyes with Wooyoung and shook his head no. It wasn’t that he couldn’t handle Seonghwa being mentioned; it was that he didn’t want to think of San and Seonghwa’s submission as the same thing. They were different people with different personalities, and he wasn’t trying to be a good Dom for San. The only thing he was trying to accomplish was seeing how Wooyoung was a good Dom for San.

This time, Wooyoung took things slowly.

Hongjoong watched transfixed as the head of San’s cock popped out of the circle of Wooyoung’s fingers, only to be covered again at an excruciatingly slow pace. San’s breath would hitch, and his hips would sway every time Wooyoung’s fingers caught on the flared edge of the head of his cock.

It looked like torture.

Soon San’s chest was heaving as he breathed in air through his mouth. It exited in short little whines, and even Hongjoong knew San was getting close. The tension built, but Wooyoung never changed his pace. His eyes roamed around San’s body, and Hongjoong just wanted to know what he was thinking.

Wooyoung’s only thoughts couldn’t be about how good San looked. Did Wooyoung know how far he could push just from how labored San’s breathing got? Was it different for every round? There was so much Hongjoong felt like he had to remember for the next time they spoke.

Hongjoong was so lost in his thoughts that it threw him off guard when Wooyoung removed his hand and stood up.

“No, no, no,” San chanted endlessly while Wooyoung just smiled down at him.

“I know you like it,” Wooyoung teased.

Hongjoong couldn’t help his smile when San shot Wooyoung a dirty look. Maybe he wasn’t as far gone as Hongjoong thought he was. If there was anything he learned from Seonghwa so far, it was that he liked obedient submissives, but a little bit of well-placed resistance could be fun.

“One more time, okay? Right to the edge and back,” Wooyoung smiled brightly.

“No,” San shook his head. “Let me cum.”

“Sannie,” Wooyoung laughed. “We’ve gone much longer before. This is only three. Are you that out of practice? Remember Hongjoongie is here watching.”

San’s eyes drifted to Hongjoong, and his breath caught in his throat. San’s eyes were still glassy, but he looked at Hongjoong like he was considering if he truly wanted to give up in front of the other man or not.

“More,” San said while he was still looking at Hongjoong.

“Okay, baby,” Wooyoung let out an amused huff of air. “Eyes on me, though.”

San’s eyes snapped away from Hongjoong and back to Wooyoung.

Wooyoung covered his hand in lube and wrapped it around San’s length again. This time the pace was brutally fast. The wet squelch of the lube made Hongjoong’s stomach turn with arousal. Wooyoung’s hand was just a blur, and Hongjoong truly had no idea how San was going to hold back or how Wooyoung was going to know when to stop.

“Good boy, Sannie, I know you want it so bad,” Wooyoung teased. “You’re going to be good for me, aren’t you? Going to hold it all in?”

San didn’t answer, and Hongjoong could see the strain on his face. San’s eyes were squeezed shut, his brows furrowed together in concentration and frustration. He had also stopped making noises.

“Close,” San breathed out.

Wooyoung stopped.

San’s entire body went tight, and Hongjoong watched in awe as a large pearl of cum leaked out of the tip of San’s cock. They might have crossed the line into a ruined orgasm, but Wooyoung looked delighted.

“A little too close, San,” Wooyoung stated firmly.

San whined in response and tilted his hips towards Wooyoung.

“Please, more,” San breathed out.

His eyes were teary now, wet and wide in a way Hongjoong hadn’t seen them before. All the sharp edges of San’s face were completely stripped away.

“Okay,” Wooyoung rolled his eyes and made a show out of putting more lube onto his hand. “Let’s get this over with if you want it so bad.”

“Please,” San whined.

When Wooyoung’s hand touched San’s cock, Hongjoong remembered the promise of overstimulation. He uncrossed and recrossed his legs, and Wooyoung’s hand kept a steady pace on San’s cock.

Hongjoong wanted to see them go longer. He wanted to know what kind of toys Wooyoung liked to use on San. He wanted to know how different the scene would be if San’s hole was stuffed uncomfortably full.

When San came, his body locked up and relaxed, his cum shooting all over his chest and stomach, with some even hitting across one of his cheeks. Hongjoong let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding before his eyes trailed to the smile on Wooyoung’s face.

Wooyoung slowed his hand down, but he didn’t stop his movements.

At first, San’s hips started to sway to get away from the stimulation, and then whiny, breathy no’s started to fall out of his mouth. How did Wooyoung know how far to push? Did he really just know his husband’s body that well? Would Hongjoong even be Seonghwa’s play partner long enough to learn his body on that intimate of a level? Hongjoong’s chest tightened at the thought.

“Stop, stop,” San started to chant.

Wooyoung didn’t stop.

There was a moment where Hongjoong thought San was going to have to use a safe word, but not even a second later Wooyoung dropped his hand.

“So good, baby,” Wooyoung cooed and leaned down to give San’s open mouth a soft kiss. “My beautiful baby.”

Hongjoong shifted. They hadn’t talked about when he was supposed to leave, but the tone had already shifted to something much more personal, and he wasn’t sure he should be there for it.

“We’ll practice more,” Wooyoung cooed as he gave San more kisses. “I know you love it. Let me untie you before I clean you up.”

Each word was dotted with more kisses, and Hongjoong’s chest burned with jealousy. He needed to leave.

When Hongjoong stood, Wooyoung spared him a quick glance. He used the moment to give Wooyoung a thumbs up before he slipped out of the bedroom door. Once he was at the front door, he reached down to readjust his hard cock so it wouldn’t be as obvious to anyone on the street. He could touch himself when he got home, but he needed to get there without embarrassing himself first.

Once he was on the street, Hongjoong took his phone out and sent Wooyoung a quick “thank you, talk soon” text. Moments later, he was home in his shower with his hand wrapped around his cock, imagining what it would be like to push Seonghwa that far.

**

Hongjoong woke up late on Sunday and lazed around the apartment in his favorite pair of pajama pants, despite them being nearly threadbare, and an old, stained white T-shirt. The majority of his day was spent lounging on the overstuffed couch in his living room, endlessly scrolling on his phone. Every so often his thoughts would drift to Wooyoung and San, and he’d open up his notes app and type out a question or comment he had for Wooyoung before he went back to social media. Eventually, he gave up on the mindlessness and opened up a teacher’s forum to hopefully get some lesson plan ideas.

It was rare for Hongjoong to spend a day being lazy. His brain had a bad habit of pushing him beyond his own limits when it came to working on projects and staying awake past his own limits. When he was furthering his degree, there were too many nights that Yunho or Mingi would catch him passed out with his face in a textbook.

There were still days, even at almost thirty, where he’d stay up all night and then need to work the next day. A restlessness seemed to be constantly lodged in the back of his brain. It kept him from fully shutting off and truly letting go.

Then there was the guilt. If he wasn’t moving, was he good enough? Even now he could be using his time to plan a scene with Seonghwa. He could have asked to meet with Wooyoung. He could have even reached out to Yeosang to ask about a new activity he saw to test the kids’ fine motor skills.

Somehow, he didn’t feel that nagging itch of not good enough, keep going.

Lately, Hongjoong felt calm in a way he wasn’t used to. His nerves and thoughts had settled into a coherent, peaceful stream for the first time in his life. It was obvious what the cause was, but Hongjoong wasn’t willing to think about it too deeply. Even if things with Seonghwa felt long term, there was an expiration date. Once Seonghwa found someone, Hongjoong would be back to the start, struggling to find another submissive. Hongjoong just needed to enjoy the peace of a calm mind while he still could.

Thankfully, the apartment had been quiet all day. Mingi and Yunho declared Sunday their date day years ago, and they didn’t normally miss a chance to get out of the house and enjoy their time together. When they finally came home, late in the afternoon, long limbs hanging over each other, Hongjoong retreated back into his bedroom for a nap. He didn’t want the couple to feel like they had to end their day together to entertain him.

He really needed to think about moving out.

At around eleven, Hongjoong was startled awake by the sound of his phone’s ringtone. He fumbled to answer the call and was startled when Seonghwa’s pretty face filled the screen. Hongjoong was too tired to be thinking straight.

“Did I wake you up?” Seonghwa’s quiet voice came through the phone.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong answered honestly. “I took a nap and I guess I just kept sleeping.”

Seonghwa shifted on the screen, and Hongjoong caught a glimpse of his pajama top.

“You don’t seem like someone who sleeps well,” Seonghwa smiled.

“I’m not,” Hongjoong laughed as he sat up in his bed. “Is everything okay, though?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “I’m hard.”

Hongjoong blinked three times as he tried to fully process the statement. Seonghwa was hard? Wasn’t he on a date earlier that night?

Jealousy swirled inside of Hongjoong. He wasn’t sure how he felt about the possibility of another man turning Seonghwa on. It was a feeling that he needed to push down for the time being. It was clear Seonghwa was looking for something from him, and Hongjoong needed to figure out what that was, and if he was going to let Seonghwa cum.

“Oh?” Hongjoong finally breathed out.

Seonghwa gave him a half smile. “I had a few glasses of wine, and I just feel so good. I was touching my chest and I want more. Can I touch myself?”

Hongjoong looked at Seonghwa through the phone with wide eyes. He wanted to ask about the date, but that wasn’t appropriate. This was his submissive coming to him, asking for permission to get off, and that’s what he needed to focus on. Just the facts, not his feelings.

“Are you asking for me to be involved or just to give you permission?” Hongjoong asked.

“Talk me through it, please, Sir,” Seonghwa shifted again, and Hongjoong realized that Seonghwa was laying on his stomach on his bed.

“Do you think you deserve it?” Hongjoong questioned in a light tone.

“Yes,” Seonghwa whined. “I feel so good I just want to touch.”

Hongjoong laughed. “Feeling good doesn’t mean you deserve it, bunny, it just means you’re horny. Are you that slutty?”

Seonghwa perked up at the name, and Hongjoong put his hand over his mouth to hide his smile.

“I am good, I didn’t touch,” Seonghwa whined. “Please, Sir, I’m so hard.”

Hongjoong hummed. He wanted to see everything, and he was going to take this opportunity to guide Seonghwa through something he’d always wanted to see.

“Set your phone up so I can see you better,” Hongjoong requested.

Seonghwa moved instantly, and Hongjoong watched as the phone fell and pointed toward the ceiling before it moved around in jerky motions and then settled again. It looked like Seonghwa had positioned it on his headboard. It wasn’t the best angle, but it worked.

“Look at your pretty pajamas,” Hongjoong commented.

“Should I take them off?” Seonghwa shifted to sit on his heels, the front of his pink pajama pants tented out from his erection.

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head, and his eyes went wide when he noticed a growing wet spot by the head of Seonghwa’s cock that caused the material of his pants to turn a dark pink. “Grab a pillow.”

“Sir,” Seonghwa inhaled. It was obvious he already knew what Hongjoong was going to ask of him.

“Put it between your legs, bunny,” Hongjoong smiled at him.

He had always wanted to see a pretty man humping his pillow desperately.

The soft glow of Seonghwa’s bedside lamp gave the room just enough light for Hongjoong to see the alcohol flush on Seonghwa’s cheeks. He looked closer to Hongjoong’s age as he moved to straddle the pillow. He was slow with it, but Hongjoong knew it had been a good idea when Seonghwa’s eyes shut as his cock finally pressed against the soft material of the pillow.

“Not enough,” Seonghwa whined.

“It’s enough,” Hongjoong commented. “Roll your hips, baby. Show me how you make yourself feel good.”

Seonghwa whined again, but his hips shifted forward. He let out a frustrated noise before he fisted the front of the pillow to hold it as he ground his hips into the soft material.

“There you go,” Hongjoong said in a low tone. “Does it feel good on your pretty cock, bunny?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded.

“Stop,” Hongjoong said simply and firmly.

Seonghwa’s hips stilled, but more out of shock than anything else.

“Sir?” Seonghwa’s eyes went wide.

Hongjoong just smiled at him.

“I don’t want Wooyoung to teach you anything else,” Seonghwa whined, but his hips stayed still.

Hongjoong let out a bright laugh. He would have told Seonghwa what he saw anyway, so it didn’t matter that Wooyoung or San already had.

“San was much less of a brat than you are,” Hongjoong commented. “Where’s my good boy?”

“Your good boy wants to cum,” Seonghwa pouted.

“I still don’t think you deserve it,” Hongjoong crossed his arms. “But keep going.”

Seonghwa nodded, and he started to grind against the pillow again. It wasn’t long until his head was thrown back, his long neck fully on display, as his pajama top slipped to the side, exposing his collarbone and some of his shoulder.

Hongjoong wanted to eat him alive.

“Slut,” Hongjoong commented. “Can’t even go two days without getting off?”

Seonghwa let his head fall forward again, and he licked over his lips, leaving them wet and shiny.

“I didn’t know I was getting a whore as a submissive,” Hongjoong laughed. “Just a desperate little thing.”

“Sir,” Seonghwa barely mumbled.

“Stop,” Hongjoong replied.

This time it took longer for Seonghwa to stop, but Hongjoong didn’t have to ask him twice.

“Please,” Seonghwa shifted his hips from side to side. It wasn’t an attempt to disobey Hongjoong, but it was no doubt an attempt to get more friction on his cock.

“Stop moving, bunny. Be good,” Hongjoong shook his head and smiled. “You know, I thought about you in San’s position. Tied up, with no way to escape, just taking anything I’m willing to give you. You’d be so pretty like that, Seonghwa. Would you like that?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded, and Hongjoong laughed at him.

“You’d agree to anything right now,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Just a desperate whore.”

“I asked,” Seonghwa breathed out. “Please, I called, I asked.”

Hongjoong nodded and adjusted his grip on his phone. “Yes, but you were touching more than your chest before you called, weren’t you?”

Seonghwa’s mouth popped open, and he nodded slowly. Did he really think Hongjoong wouldn’t notice how on edge he already was?

“I thought so,” Hongjoong hummed. “Okay, use the pillow, show me how pretty you are.”

Seonghwa nodded a few times but wasted no time. His hips rolled forward and stayed there. He humped against his pillow with firm little motions, clearly searching for more friction than he was getting. Hongjoong watched Seonghwa’s face for signs that he was close and then looked to Seonghwa’s chest to see how deeply he was breathing before his focus turned to Seonghwa’s hips. Hongjoong didn’t know what Seonghwa’s tells were yet, but he had a feeling Seonghwa was dangerously close.

“Stop, bunny.”

Seonghwa ignored him.

“Stop,” Hongjoong repeated.

Seonghwa still didn’t stop.

Hongjoong watched, amazed, as Seonghwa fell forward and ground down into the pillow as his body shook through an orgasm. He didn’t like being disobeyed, but Hongjoong couldn’t find a good reason to be mad. It was their first time trying anything like that, and Seonghwa had clearly lost control.

“Oh, bunny,” Hongjoong sighed. “I guess you don’t know how to be good.”

Seonghwa looked up, his eyes glassy with tears.

“Don’t cry,” Hongjoong shook his head. “But you will be getting a punishment for that.”

He didn’t miss the way Seonghwa perked up at the mention of a punishment.

“Bunny, I don’t do funishments,” Hongjoong laughed. “You won’t enjoy it.”

Seonghwa grumbled as he flopped onto his back. “I’m sorry I couldn’t stop, it was just so good.”

“I know,” Hongjoong nodded. “You need to clean up and go to bed. You have work in the morning.”

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa slowly sat up. He threw his pillow on the floor aggressively before he grabbed his phone and stood up.

“Take the pillowcase off,” Hongjoong laughed. “You’ll regret it if you don’t.”

“Sleepy,” Seonghwa whined. He wasn’t even holding the phone straight; Hongjoong could only see Seonghwa’s chest.

“Be good now,” Hongjoong said softly. “Take the pillowcase off and go clean yourself up. Get a new pajama set.”

“What if I sleep nude?” Seonghwa countered.

“You can do that,” Hongjoong nodded to himself.

The phone was clearly thrown onto the bed, and Hongjoong held back another laugh as the pillowcase was held in front of the phone camera. He was then treated to a view of the soiled pajama pants and pajama top before the phone was picked up again.

“You’re so pretty, bunny,” Hongjoong smiled.

Seonghwa’s face went from relaxed to surprised. “Thank you, Sir.”

“Did you clean yourself up?” Hongjoong asked.

“I have wipes in here,” Seonghwa mumbled.

“Of course you do, so needy,” Hongjoong smiled. “Sleep well, Seonghwa. I’ll see you Wednesday.”

“Good night, Sir,” Seonghwa smiled back at him before he ended the call.

Hongjoong didn’t touch himself that night, but he did spend a few sleepless hours wondering just how good Seonghwa’s date was.

Chapter Text

There was no communication between Hongjoong and Seonghwa after the incident on Sunday night. Hongjoong slept fitfully that night and woke up grumpy, stomping around the kitchen and hyper-focused on the fact that Seonghwa had a good date, one that had been good enough to leave him horny by the end of it.

He didn’t even have proof that it had been a good date, since Seonghwa hadn’t mentioned it, and Hongjoong had no idea what dating Seonghwa looked like. They just had a kink agreement, and there were no feelings or room for feelings between them. And yet here Hongjoong was, jealous as hell.

There was real reason for him to even be jealous. Hongjoong didn’t stand a chance against the men that Seonghwa was likely seeing. They had to be much older than him, maybe even older than Seonghwa, and wildly successful. Why would Seonghwa date down? He deserved someone who was the same status as him, someone who was at least in the same tax bracket. Seonghwa needed someone that could take care of him and the family that he wanted to have.

That wasn’t Hongjoong. Not now anyway. Maybe it was time to push himself further and advance in his career even if he did love being in a classroom. Not for Seonghwa though, that would be stupid. Hongjoong had to do it for himself, and he wasn’t ready to take that kind of a leap. Though he guessed having a baby on the way would be a good enough reason for a major life change.

What was he even thinking?

By Monday afternoon Hongjoong had worked himself up enough to stop by the florist again. He ordered another large bouquet to be sent to Seonghwa’s office. This time he requested something that would smell good, and that if possible the smell would linger.

The end result was a massive bouquet that was dotted with white lilies and gardenia blooms that were broken up with some kind of green leaves. When the women who owned the shop presented the bouquet to Hongjoong he shoved his face in it and took a deep breath while she laughed at him.

He shouldn’t be sending Seonghwa more flowers, there was no reason for it. They were an obvious ploy for attention. It didn’t matter that he thought Seonghwa deserved beautiful things. Sending flowers should be up to Seonghwa’s dates. What if the good date man had hand dropped some off while Hongjoong’s bouquet was on Seonghwa’s desk. The idea thrilled him as much as it made Hongjoong feel guilty.

By Tuesday afternoon, well after the flowers would have been delivered, Hongjoong still hadn’t gotten a thank you message from Seonghwa even though he had signed the card with his name. Seonghwa had clearly and silently called him out over the cry for attention. The other man had clearly won.

When Wednesday rolled around, Hongjoong was jittery and short tempered. He really needed to figure out how to build a wall between him and Seonghwa. He could not continue to let the other man impact his days. They were going to need to talk about the dating thing, even if he was dreading it.

“Do I want to ask if you’re okay?” Yeosang mumbled as they cleaned up the classroom.

“Seonghwa dating is fucking with me,” Hongjoong answered honestly.

Yeosang let out a dry laugh, “that makes sense.”

Hongjoong nodded and sighed, “and I keep sending him flowers at work. What is wrong with me?”

“You what?” Yeosang shook his head.

“Twice,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Once as a sorry, and he brought them home, but I just did it again. He got them yesterday and hasn’t said anything.”

“Stop marking your territory,” Yeosang commented.

Hongjoong groaned and threw his head back, “he’s mine in so many ways, but not mine at all. It’s weird. I’m still getting used to it, but I just worry all the time that it’s the last time.”

“Talk to him about it?” Yeosang shrugged.

“I’m going to,” Hongjoong made a face at himself. “It’s so stupid. It’s fine that he’s dating. I just don’t know how to be normal about it.”

“Is it fine?” Yeosang paused what he was doing to look at Hongjoong seriously.

“It’s what I agreed to, it has to be fine,” Hongjoong nodded. It wasn’t a complete lie, he did have to be fine with it.

Yeosang let out a heavy sigh, “you’re not a casual person, you go into everything completely which is fine and maybe admirable. Just make sure you’re not hurting yourself along the way. Okay?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong waved his hands. “I’m fine, heart guarded and all that. It’s just sad knowing the shitty sub cycle is going to start again when I feel relaxed and less on edge for the first time in forever.”

“This is you less on edge?” Yeosang laughed.

Hongjoong threw a stray crayon at Yeosang. It hit him in the chest and Yeosang faked outrage before he tossed it back at Hongjoong. It hit him in the shoulder before it fell limply to the ground.

“How are you doing?” Hongjoong asked as he picked up the crayon to put it away. “You know with the Wooyoung and San stuff?”

“Over it,” Yeosang shrugged.

“I can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or not,” Hongjoong frowned slightly.

“No sarcasm,” Yeosang smiled brightly. “There’s a guy at the gym I’m interested in. He’s kind of cautious, and younger than us, but I’m sure he likes me.”

“That was quick,” Hongjoong commented with a smile as he finished placing the last chair on top of its desk.

Yeosang shrugged, “I knew this guy when I was hooking up with Wooyoung and San. We were always flirting. I always liked him emotionally. I was just physically occupied you know? Now that I’m not, and I figured out how to process and move on from the Wooyoung and San thing I can go for him.”

“What’s his name?” Hongjoong questioned as he went to grab his bag.

“You don’t name the puppy before you decide to keep the puppy,” Yeosang wagged his finger at Hongjoong.

“That’s terrible,” Hongjoong laughed.

“You’re just too soft and romantic for sometime like that,” Yeosang grinned. “You’re out here naming your future puppies before you even have a the first date.”

“You are my least favorite friend,” Hongjoong deadpanned. “And I’m not romantic.”

“Cutely obsessive then?” Yeosang fought to keep a straight face. “That feels more accurate.”

“At least I’m cute,” Hongjoong sighed in defeat.

Yeosang nodded, “you do have a boyish charm, maybe Seonghwa is into that.”

Hongjoong rolled his eyes, “I am so sure that Seonghwa is going out with big men with big wallets and cards without limits. He wants a father for his kids.”

“That’s,” Yeosang looked at him like he was the stupidest person on earth. “Does he want a wallet or a coparent? We both know money doesn’t make a good parent.”

Hongjoong whined and shut his eyes. He could so clearly see the kind of man Seonghwa would go for. Bigger than Hongjoong, bigger than Seonghwa even, broad with a sly smile and perfectly styled hair. They’d be a power couple, raising kids who would surely take over whatever industry they went into. With Seonghwa’s looks they could be models or actors.

A flick to his forehead brought Hongjoong out of his thoughts. He flinched backwards and waved his hands to shoo Yeosang away from his face.

“What the fuck was that for?” Hongjoong frowned.

“Don’t get lost in your own head,” Yeosang answered. “Maybe you should ask him out on a real date?”

“Absolutely not,” Hongjoong shook his head.

“Because you don’t like him?” Yeosang started. “Or because you don’t want kids? Because you do like him and you do want kids.”

“Because he’s my play partner,” Hongjoong grumbled. “It’s not a romantic thing.”

“I don’t have the time for this,” Yeosang shook his head. “It could be romantic if you weren’t letting yourself wallow in your own misery. I can ask Wooyoung what kind of guys he’s dating if you want.”

Hongjoong opened his mouth to say yes, but thankfully his brain caught up with him first.

“You’re talking to Wooyoung?” Hongjoong made a face.

“Yeah,” Yeosang nodded. “I saw them on Sunday. We met up and I got to meet the girls. I think we’re going to be good friends. San is super cute with the kids.”

“I think you’re the most well adjusted person I know,” Hongjoong’s mouth popped open slightly.

“Communication and self reflection,” Yeosang shrugged. “Anyway, I need to get to the gym, you need anything else here?”

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “Go. But we need to figure out the thing with Jiwoo tomorrow.”

“Sounds good,” Yeosang picked up his bag and gave Hongjoong a wave before he disappeared down the hallway.

Hongjoong finished cleaning up the room before he left. It was something that he could have saved for the morning but he was still running early for his meeting with Seonghwa so there was no real reason for him to not take his time. The routine of it all was a good distraction anyway. Pick up the chairs, put everything away, clean up the book corner, make sure nothing was going to be in the way for the janitorial staff.

After he finally left Hongjoong made a quick stop at the cafe on the way to Seonghwa’s building. Hongjoong skipped getting something for himself again and got Jongho and Seonghwa drinks with a small slice of a sweet lemony bread for Seonghwa.

When Hongjoong got into the building and up to Seonghwa’s floor he was surprised to see Jongho holding a backpack clearly ready to head out for the day.

“You know you could send me flowers too, not just bring me coffee,” Jongho grinned.

Hongjoong didn’t have it in himself to deny that he was sending the flowers, “just take your coffee.”

“I’ll let Mr. Park know you’re here,” Jongho shifted back behind the desk and elbowed the girl who was now standing there out of the way so that he could pick up the phone.

“Leaving early?” Hongjoong questioned.

Jongho’s face broke out into a smile, “meeting a friend. Normally I only see him over the weekend, but he was busy on Sunday, so we made plans for today.”

“Oh?” Hongjoong cocked his head to the side with a smile. He was dangerous to assume what Jongho’s relationship with his friend was, but Hongjoong still wanted to tease the younger man.

“I will dump this coffee on you,” Jongho threatened but he was still smiling.

“Enjoy your time with your friend,” Hongjoong reached out and pinched Jongho’s cheek.

“Aish,” Jongho yelled as he swatted Hongjoong’s had away.

“See you next week Jongho,” Hongjoong called after him when Jongho walked away grumbling without a goodbye.

Hongjoong turned and looked at the girl behind the desk, he nodded his head to her before he turned down the hallway that led to Seonghwa’s office. He still wasn’t sure how he was going to bring up the fact that Seonghwa dating made him feel insecure. The worst outcome, that he played over and over in his head, would be Seonghwa ending things because Hongjoong was too immature for their agreement. It wasn’t immaturity though, Hongjoong just needed a little stability, and he didn’t want to be surprised by things ending. Hongjoong knew that he was going to need to ease himself into it. He needed to know that their last time was going to be the last time. There was no way that he could continue to leave Seonghwa’s house wondering if he’d see him again.

“Seonsaengnim?”

Hongjoong jumped and looked to his side. A small women stood smiling at him. It only took him a moment to recognize her as Jiwoo’s mother. He had only met her a few times, but she was a beautiful young woman who had a face that was hard to forget.

“Oh, hello,” Hongjoong smiled and bowed at her. “I didn’t know you worked here.”

“Yes,” She nodded firmly. “Since I was young, I’ve been working my way up. Was Jiwoo better today?”

Hongjoong made a little face, “he still cried. Yeo, Mr. Kang and I are going to figure out something tomorrow and present it to you and your sister.”

“I’ve been spending more time with him like you suggested,” she frowned. “I promise he’s well supported.”

“I know he is,” Hongjoong gave her a warm smile. “That was never in question. Kids that young don’t always know how to express themselves. He could be upset over so many simple things that you’ve never even thought of.”

She gave him a relieved smile, “thank you Mr. Kim.”

“Of course,” Hongjoong nodded. “And he’s such a smart little boy, he might just be a little ahead of himself as well. It’s hard to tell. We’ll figure it out though.”

“Everyone in the class is so lucky to have you and Mr. Kang as their teachers,” she commented and scooted a little closer to Hongjoong.

“Thank you,” Hongjoong smiled at her brightly. “We always do our best.”

“What brings you here?” She looked around. “I wouldn’t have guessed you were a man interested in cosmetics or skin care.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong opened his mouth but stopped talking when he felt a firm hand on his shoulder.

“He has a meeting with me,” Seonghwa’s voice said from behind Hongjoong.

“Mr. Park,” the woman bowed and Hongjoong tried his best to not flinch away from Seonghwa’s firm grip on his shoulder.

“We have a weekly consultation,” Seonghwa continued. “It sounds like you already know about how talented he is.”

“Mr. Kim is the best teacher,” she nodded.

“We’ll be getting to our meeting now,” Seonghwa stated simply.

“Oh yes, of course,” she nodded and bowed again. “Please let me know what the plan is Mr. Kim. I’ll take time off for a meeting if I need to.”

“We can meet when you’re done with work if needed,” Hongjoong smiled. “No need to take time off. I’ll be in touch though.”

Hongjoong was surprised to feel Seonghwa push him away from the woman and towards his office. Was Seonghwa jealous? That didn’t make any sense. Still, Seonghwa was clearly trying to get Hongjoong away from his student’s mother.

“She’s a single mom,” Seonghwa said flatly once the door was closed behind them.

Hongjoong set the coffee and lemon bread on the desk. “I know, her sister picks her son up in the afternoons. They’re an amazing team, you don’t always need a romantic partner to raise children.”

“Would you ever date one of your student’s parents?” Seonghwa looked down and shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

Why was Seonghwa asking him these questions? What was happening?

“I never thought about it,” Hongjoong shrugged. “There are no rules against it, but I don’t exactly want to date just anyone.”

“You would if they were into kink?” Seonghwa continued.

Hongjoong frowned. “I’m not sure how I’d find out a student’s parent was into kink.”

“Do you like women?” Seonghwa pressed.

Hongjoong let out a forced laugh, “not really, sometimes, I guess? I don’t really think about it. I’ve had long term relationships with women and men. I haven’t seriously pursued a woman since I got into kink though.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa looked at Hongjoong with his wide eyes and bit at his bottom lip nervously.

“I’m fine with what we’re doing,” Hongjoong commented. “I’m not looking for anything else right now.”

Thankfully the unlike you that he wanted to finish that sentence with died in his mouth before Hongjoong could say it.

“Right,” Seonghwa nodded and seemed to come back to himself a little bit. “That’s me not you.”

Hongjoong nodded and kept his mouth shut. He knew he could say hurtful things when he didn’t mean to, so it was better to just stay quiet.

“I hope that’s not getting weird,” Seonghwa shrugged.

“Actually,” Hongjoong paused. “I’m always a little worried that every time I see you, you’re going to stop things.”

“I won’t do that to you randomly,” Seonghwa frowned and reached out to grab Hongjoong’s hand. “I respect you. I like what we’re doing, and I’m not going to be an asshole when we stop things. I’ll be honest with you always. Plus, I haven’t gone out on a single good date yet anyway.”

Hongjoong looked anywhere but at Seonghwa as he tried to will his hand to not get sweaty while Seonghwa was holding it. “Thank you for that. I guess I was just worried when you called me that horny after your date.”

“I was just buzzed and horny,” Seonghwa looked to the side but tighten his grip. “I was thinking about…”

“What?” Hongjoong asked after a long pause.

“Nothing,” Seonghwa dropped Hongjoong’s hand. “I told you I’ve been more horny than usual, and I wanted to be good.”

“You weren’t good at all.” Hongjoong answered flatly and Seonghwa laughed.

“Well, yeah,” Seonghwa shrugged with a smile.

“Brat,” Hongjoong said fondly. “I think you should be on your knees now. Where’s your pillow?”

Seonghwa smiled brightly before he sauntered over to his desk. Hongjoong didn’t even try to cover his laugh.

Thankfully that moment was enough to switch the mood, and Hongjoong pulled his chair out before he turned it to the side. He couldn’t help but wonder how many people had sat in this chair and been intimidated by Seonghwa. It was obvious that he was respected at work, and likely by everyone around him. Hongjoong respected him too, but he couldn’t help but feel lucky that he was the only one that got to see Seonghwa on his knees.

“Sir,” Seonghwa said once the pillow was placed and he was on his knees.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Hongjoong laughed. “You couldn’t follow a very simple instruction.”

“But-” Seonghwa gave him an exaggerated pout.

“It’s not even that you came,” Hongjoong leaned forward into Seonghwa’s space. “It was that I could tell you were touching long before you called me. You called me to help you get off, not because you knew you needed permission. Showing me a picture with your palm covered in your cum wouldn’t have saved you from punishment.”

“Sir,” Seonghwa whined. It was obvious that he couldn’t defend himself.

“Hopefully you’ll see that my punishments aren’t fun and that will help you behave in the future.” Hongjoong nodded before he sat back again. “There will be a punishment during our next scene.”

Seonghwa nodded.

“It will not involve any kind of impact play or orgasm denial.” Hongjoong stated. “It’s a punishment it won’t be something that you’ll enjoy.”

“I understand.” The corners of Seonghwa’s mouth drooped down into a frown.

“If you’re good for your punishment we’ll have a normal scene afterwards.” Hongjoong placed his hands on his thighs. “I want to try some restraint on you if that’s okay. You’re your ankles in a spreader bar that will also hold your wrists behind your back.”

“Yes,” Seonghwa said quickly.

“Don’t,” Hongjoong reached out but stopped himself. He couldn’t grab or slap Seonghwa here. Seonghwa couldn’t leave his office with wet eyes and a red cheek. “Don’t interrupt me.”

“Sorry Sir,” Seonghwa shifted backwards.

Hongjoong looked down at Seonghwa’s lap and saw the distinct outline of his cock pushing against his dress pants. It took all of Hongjoong’s self control to not rest his foot on it and tell Seonghwa to hump it until he came.

“Maybe a blindfold and a dildo. I assume you have dildos. Is that correct?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa nodded with a smile.

“Okay. I want you to lay out three, so I can pick. Is that okay?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa’s small frown had now turned into a smile.

“Is face slapping okay?” Hongjoong leaned forward again to cover his own erection.

“You can do anything to me,” Seonghwa answered as his breathing picked up.

“Can I fuck you?” Hongjoong asked without thinking. Once the words were out of his mouth he regretted them. They had agreed on things being sexual, but they had never spoken about penetrative sex directly. That could be something that Seonghwa wanted to save for his romantic partners.

“Of course you can,” Seonghwa smiled. “Sir.”

“Okay.” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide. “That too then.”

“You’re going to fuck me?” Seonghwa scooted a little closer to Hongjoong until his chest was touching Hongjoong’s knees.

The situation was getting dangerous, and Hongjoong didn’t know if he had the self control needed to hold back. Not when Seonghwa was so close and so willing.

“I’m going to fuck you pretty boy,” Hongjoong answered sweetly but he pushed his chair back almost panicked at their contact. He needed to get control over the situation.

“I really want that,” Seonghwa licked over his lips and looked up at Hongjoong.

“Don’t be too excited,” Hongjoong shook his head. “You’re being punished first.”

“Sir.” Seonghwa blinked his eyes. “I’m going to need to touch myself.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh at him. “Not happening bunny. Control your cock for once.”

Seonghwa frowned at him but recovered and put on a sweet pouting face, “please Sir? I’ll do it right here in my office, or in the bathroom. You can watch.”

As much as he’d love to disappear into a bathroom stall with Seonghwa, Hongjoong wasn’t willing to risk Seonghwa’s career.

“You’re not thinking straight right now,” Hongjoong put his hand on Seonghwa’s shoulder. “I said no. When I leave, you’re going to drink your coffee, eat your lemon bread, and calm down. Then you’re going to make it to Friday without putting your hand on your cock.”

“Can I finger myself?” Seonghwa asked with face innocence.

“Seonghwa.” Hongjoong said completely exasperated.

“Yes Sir?” Seonghwa blinked at him sweetly.

“Keep your hands off your cock and your fingers away from your ass, no toys either.” Hongjoong shook his head.

“But I like to touch myself thinking about you.” Seonghwa pouted.

Hongjoong nearly choked on air.

“This is getting you a longer punishment,” Hongjoong gritted out. “Do you understand?”

Two weeks ago, he would have folded the second Seonghwa started to pout. Even now Hongjoong wasn’t sure where he was getting the ability to say no from. Maybe it was just to make sure that Seonghwa remained professional at work. No matter what it was Hongjoong was proud of himself for not cracking.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa let out a huff of air and sat back on his heels.

“You’re going to pout?” Hongjoong gave Seonghwa an amused look.

Seonghwa crossed his arms and nodded. “Yes. Till Friday.”

“You’re going to pout for the rest of the week?” Hongjoong laughed.

“Till I get your cock,” Seonghwa nodded again.

“That makes me want to wait longer.” Hongjoong reached out and poked Seonghwa’s cheek. “You look very cute when you’re pouting.”

Seonghwa’s pout turned into a frown quickly. “You have too much self control. Aren’t I hot enough for you to let go a little?”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh again, but he reached out and tugged one of Seonghwa’s hands free and placed it over his own erection. He didn’t correct Seonghwa when the man grabbed the length through Hongjoong’s pants.

“I’m not immune.” Hongjoong commented. “I’m just remembering your job because apparently you’re too much of a slut to remember that you’re at work right now.”

Seonghwa whined, but he didn’t remove his hand. He spread his fingers out and pushed his palm down. Hongjoong let out a quiet moan before he grabbed Seonghwa’s wrist and pulled his hand away.

“We need to stop now.” Hongjoong said firmly. “You can get up.”

This time Seonghwa obeyed without question. He stood and Hongjoong looked up at him for a moment before he pulled himself out of his chair. They were both obviously aroused and Hongjoong knew neither could leave the office just yet, but he didn’t know where to take the conversation.

“Seonghwa?” Hongjoong tried.

“Hongjoong?” Seonghwa echoed his tone.

“I’m not ready to stop yet.” Hongjoong mumbled.

He meant their whole agreement not just the moment they were currently in, but he wasn’t sure Seonghwa would understand that.

“Me either,” Seonghwa answered quietly.

Hongjoong shut his eyes and focused on getting his body under control. Things hadn’t ever felt this charged between them before. He was itching to get his hands on Seonghwa, and all he wanted was to offer to take Seonghwa home and have their planned scene that night. Hongjoong didn’t know how he was going to last two more days.

“I have a meeting soon.” Seonghwa finally commented.

Hongjoong opened his eyes. “Are you okay to have a meeting?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “I’ll still finish my drink and the bread though.”

“Okay, good.” Hongjoong nodded.

“Are you good to go home?” Seonghwa forced a laugh as he picked up his pillow.

“Of course I am.” Hongjoong smiled as he grabbed his bag.

“I loved the flowers by the way,” Seonghwa commented. “You don’t have to keep doing that though.”

Hongjoong cringed at himself. “It was just something that happened. The shop is close to my house.”

“Let me clarify,” Seonghwa smiled. “I’m not saying don’t do it. I’m saying you don’t have to do it.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong nodded. “Okay, yeah, I can, I’ll figure that out.”

“It’s kind of fun to have the office thinking I’m being courted,” Seonghwa let out a dry laugh.

“Courted?” Hongjoong titled his head a little.

“You know,” Seonghwa waved his hand. “Little gifts, flowers, sweet gestures, someone really going out of their way to get me.”

“That’s what you want?” Hongjoong questioned.

“It is,” Seonghwa nodded. “I feel like I deserve to be chased after.”

“You do,” Hongjoong nodded firmly. “Anyone unwilling to do that doesn’t deserve you.”

Seonghwa smiled, but it didn’t fully reach his eyes. “You’re going to be a great partner to someone someday Hongjoong. I really hope you can eventually find someone who loves all sides of you.”

Hongjoong tried to keep a neutral expression. The mood that afternoon had shifted so many times, and he didn’t want to leave on a somber note. Why did everything suddenly feel like so much?

“You too Seonghwa.” Hongjoong broke the heavy moment awkwardly. He posed with a big fake grin, and two thumbs up while bending one of his legs at the knee. He quickly switched his thumbs up to a peace sign and brought his hands up to poke at his cheeks.

Seonghwa let out a series of giggles that turned into loud laughter. Hongjoong would embarrass himself a million times over just to hear Seonghwa laugh like that.

“Okay get out.” Seonghwa shoved Hongjoong’s shoulder. “This was a weird afternoon, and I need to get my brain together for this meeting.”

“Okay okay,” Hongjoong held his hands up in defeat.

There was a nagging in his brain to push and ask why the mood had been weird, but Hongjoong knew that he had to leave it alone. Not everything needed to be analyzed but he knew he’d obsess over every exchange of words the second he got home.

On his way out of the office Hongjoong went slightly out of his way to say goodbye to Jiwoo’s mother in an attempt to calm down a little more. They chatted briefly about Jiwoo before she excused herself to finish her workday. It was enough for Hongjoong to get his hormones in check, but he did elect to walk most of the way home despite the distance.

When Hongjoong got home and finally checked his phone he couldn’t help but smile at the picture that Seonghwa had sent him. It was an empty paper coffee cup, and a brown bag littered with little yellow crumbs.

His good, bratty, boy.

**

Thursday night, Hongjoong locked himself in his room with his cheap laminator and several sheets of bright neon paper. He spent hours carefully laminating each sheet, then cutting out large numbers, completely absorbed in the process. He never minded giving up his free time for classroom projects. It was part of the joy of being a teacher for him.

Earlier that day, Yeosang had spent three extra hours redoing the bulletin board, and Hongjoong felt inspired to do something extra as well. He wanted to do something that would make the kids smile and be fully engaged with whatever they were learning. The thrill of watching a child’s eyes light up when they finally understood a concept was unlike anything else he had ever felt. It made every second of effort completely worth it. Hongjoong loved it, and he loved that he could share that love with the kids.

Around ten Hongjoong stood and stretched his arms and back before he reached for his phone. An instant panic hit him when he realized he had three missed calls from Seonghwa and a series of unread text messages. The last one was sent nearly a half hour earlier.

Seonghwa

Can you come pick me up

Sorry I just got left on the side of the road and I couldn’t think of anyone else call

I didn’t mean to bother you

There were no voicemails to go along with the missed calls, and Hongjoong found himself calling Seonghwa back automatically.

It went straight to voicemail.

Without a second thought, Hongjoong grabbed his bag and headed out the door with his shoes half on. He didn’t even spare Mingi and Yunho, who were on the couch, a glance. Something was wrong, and he had to get to Seonghwa. The only thing he could think of doing was showing up at the man’s apartment. If Seonghwa wasn’t there, he’d call Wooyoung, and then the cops.

He tried to call Seonghwa three more times before his phone finally lit up with Seonghwa’s name. Relief flooded Hongjoong’s body, and he struggled to accept the call with a sweaty finger.

“Seonghwa.” Hongjoong breathed out into the phone. “Are you okay? Are you safe?”

“I’m home,” Seonghwa answered flatly.

“I’m almost there.” Hongjoong picked up his pace as he walked down the empty sidewalk.

“You don’t need to do that,” Seonghwa tried to argue.

“I’ll be there soon,” Hongjoong said firmly. “I’ll bring you cake.”

Seonghwa let out a wet laugh. “Okay, Hongjoong. That sounds nice.”

“And tea,” Hongjoong nodded to himself as he started looking at the buildings around him for an open cafe.

“I’ll see you soon?” Seonghwa questioned.

“Fifteen minutes,” Hongjoong nodded to himself as he turned into a cafe. “Maybe ten.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa’s voice was soft but rough, like he had been crying.

Hongjoong gripped his phone tightly. He had never heard Seonghwa sound so small and sad. He was ready to kill if needed.

The stop at the cafe was quick. Hongjoong bought all of their remaining desserts and ordered one of each of their hot teas. It was too much but he didn’t have the time to stop and contemplate what he was doing. There was something wrong and he had to get to Seonghwa.

Then he ran.

Hongjoong was at Seonghwa’s door eight minutes after he hung up the phone.

When Seonghwa pulled open the door he was met with Hongjoong breathing heavy with sweat on his brow. He held out a tray with four cups and a large bag of desserts.

“Come in,” Seonghwa stepped to the side, holding the door open.

“I didn’t know which ones,” Hongjoong said lamely, shifting the tray and bag from one hand to the other as he stepped inside.

“That’s okay,” Seonghwa said, offering a tight smile. He took the tray and bag from Hongjoong, adjusting the weight in his hands as he did.

Hongjoong hurried to kick his shoes off, dragging them a few feet away. He avoided looking directly at Seonghwa, not wanting him to feel like his submission was necessary in that moment. He just wanted to be there for his friend, without anything else hanging over their heads.

Seonghwa glanced back over his shoulder, catching Hongjoong lingering a few steps behind. “I would have done that,” he said softly.

“Not tonight, it’s okay,” Hongjoong offered him a small smile. “Do you want to talk about what happened?”

“I want you to tell me what you got.” Seonghwa pointed to the bag that he had set down next to the latest bouquet that Hongjoong had sent him.

“Oh,” Hongjoong looked over Seonghwa’s face.

His anger flared again when he noticed that Seonghwa’s eyes were rimmed red and he looked puffier than usual. His eye make-up was also running down his cheeks slightly. Hongjoong couldn’t help but reach out with his hand and use his thumb to rub away one of the black lines. “I don’t even know what I got.”

“Then let’s find out,” Seonghwa leaned into Hongjoong’s touch.

“Okay.” Hongjoong dropped his hand. “I think the tea is lemon ginger, lavender honey, sweet orange, and hibiscus.”

“I want the orange.” Seonghwa waited for Hongjoong to hand him the cup. “Which one do you want?”

“The lavender.” Hongjoong set his own cup aside and looked at the large bag. “I did too much, I’m sorry. I just wanted to get here to know that you were okay.”

“It’s fine,” Seonghwa nodded. “Let’s just share something. It’ll be fun, whatever you pick first. I’ll get two spoons.”

“Okay.” Hongjoong nodded and watched a little amazed as Seonghwa moved around his kitchen. Something bad had happened, and Seonghwa had clearly choked it down, but not far enough for it to not be seen.

He watched as Seonghwa took their two cups over to the couch and scrambled to pick a box from the bag. Hongjoong didn’t take the one from the top. He dug for a while until he found a larger box. There was no way he could tell what was in it, but he wanted to make sure that Seonghwa was well taken care of and to do that he needed a bigger portion of something.

“I think it’s chocolate cake.” Hongjoong commented as he walked over with the box. “That was the biggest box.”

“We can splurge.” Seonghwa nodded with a forced smiled.

Hongjoong’s heart ached in his chest. He had no idea how to fix whatever had happened, but he was okay with doing whatever Seonghwa wanted.

So, he took the spoon when it was handed to him and opened the box to see a slice of chocolate cake with some kind of red fruit spread on top. Seonghwa didn’t wait to dig his spoon into the dessert, and Hongjoong sat quietly watching as Seonghwa ate and sipped on his drink.

It felt like hours had passed before Seonghwa spoke.

“I’m sorry I scared you.” Seonghwa said softly. “I just couldn’t think of anyone else to call.”

“You can always call me.” Hongjoong stressed. “I was working on something for school and didn’t have my sound on. It’ll never happen again.”

“It’s okay,” Seonghwa gave him a real smile. “You’re here now, and I feel better.”

“Good.” Hongjoong nodded firmly.

“I can tell you what happened if you still want to know,” Seonghwa offered.

Hongjoong shifted on the couch to face Seonghwa directly, “please. If you want to.”

Seonghwa nodded, “I went on a date. It was just supposed to be a quick dinner. He wanted to go to a place outside of the city. I let him drive me.”

Hongjoong swallowed dryly before he reached for his tea. He already knew that he’d need to be occupied to get through this story.

“Some of these guys that I’m going out with look at me like I’m a prize and nothing else.” Seonghwa continued. “I hate it. They want to collect me or capture me and keep me at home. He was like that. I’m honest about wanting a family and sometimes they just assume I’ll quit my job, and I might want to do that, but not because some guy tells me too. You know?”

Hongjoong nodded but he didn’t speak.

“Anyway, it obviously wasn’t going anywhere.” Seonghwa ate a bite of the cake and spoke around it. “And even if it was a great date I don’t do anything physical on the first few dates anyway out of respect for myself and you.”

Hongjoong hid his smile behind his cup.

“On the way back here, he parked his car on this dirt turn off from the road.” Seonghwa breathed out. “And he tried to get something physical started. I told him no, but he wasn’t really listening to me.”

It took all of Hongjoong’s self-control to not crush the cup he was holding. He’d kill whoever this man was.

“He didn’t get anywhere.” Seonghwa waved his hands. “He only touched my shoulders and my arms. When he grabbed my hands I just got out of the car. I didn’t think he’d drive away.”

“He left you.” Hongjoong said slowly.

“I didn’t want to be in the car with him anyway.” Seonghwa shrugged. “But I thought of you first and called and texted before I realized I could just get a kakao taxi.”

“That’s okay.” Hongjoong nodded. “I’m glad you got out of the car and that things weren’t worse.”

“Me too.” Seonghwa said quietly. “It was still a lot.”

“I understand,” Hongjoong slowly reached out and let his fingers bush over Seonghwa’s. It wasn’t something he’d normally do, but he wanted to offer Seonghwa all of the comfort he felt capable of.

Seonghwa turned his hand palm up and laced their fingers together. “I feel dumb for crying. It was obvious I cried right?”

“Yes, but it’s okay.” Hongjoong squeezed his hand. “It doesn’t matter how far he got, it still sounds scary.”

“Do you want to hurt him?” Seonghwa asked.

Hongjoong let out a surprised laugh, “of course I want to hurt him.”

“Good puppy Dom,” Seonghwa smiled and reached out with his free hand to pat Hongjoong’s head.

Hongjoong let out a relieved laugh. “I think anyone that cares about you would like to hurt him.”

“That’s true,” Seonghwa nodded. “Don’t mention this to Wooyoung or San please. I need to figure out a way to tell them. Wooyoung knows the guy.”

Hongjoong nodded. “I won’t say anything.”

“Thank you,” Seonghwa smiled again.

“Can I give you a bath?” Hongjoong blurted out.

“What?”

“I just, I don’t know, if it’ll help, can I, please?” Hongjoong mumbled out.

“I’m okay.” Seonghwa stressed. “I was frustrated and stranded. I’m okay though.”

“But you’re sad,” Hongjoong pointed out. “And you were scared, even if you don’t want to say that part.”

“I’m okay,” Seonghwa nodded firmly.

“Your makeup is still running down your face.” Hongjoong pointed out kindly.

“Okay,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Let’s make a deal. You can clean me up, but after that you have to let me do your make-up.”

“What?” Hongjoong blinked.

“That’s the deal, that’s what I want.” Seonghwa nodded firmly.

“Whatever you want.” Hongjoong nodded. He could be there late. He’d deal with any loss of sleep if it meant Seonghwa was still smiling.

“Okay come on,” Seonghwa stood and tugged on Hongjoong’s hand.

Hongjoong stood obediently and let Seonghwa drag him down the hallway to the bathroom. When he reached the room Seonghwa flipped the light on and dropped Hongjoong’s hand.

“I want a bath bomb and a bubble bar,” Seonghwa stated. “And you can wash my hair.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded as he watched Seonghwa move around and dig through a drawer.

“You have no idea what I’m talking about do you?” Seonghwa turned and laughed.

“Only like half of the stuff you’re saying makes sense.” Hongjoong shrugged.

“Bath bomb,” Seonghwa held up a large circular object and then a tie dye cloud. “Bubble bar.”

“If you’re going to continue to take care of me you need to know these things,” Seonghwa nodded. “These two go together well.”

“You need both of these things?” Hongjoong stepped forward.

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded firmly. “And take off your shirt.”

“Seonghwa.” Hongjoong laughed.

“It’ll get wet.” Seonghwa smiled as he turned on the water. “Now feel the temperature of the water. This is what I like.”

Hongjoong laughed again, “you are very bossy for a submissive.”

“I am a man who knows what he wants,” Seonghwa nodded.

Hongjoong shook his head but moved to hold his hand under the water anyway. It was near scalding. Seonghwa was going to be tinted pink when he got out of the bath and Hongjoong couldn’t wait.

“Shirt.” Seonghwa pulled at Hongjoong’s sleeve.

“This feels like you just want to see me shirtless,” Hongjoong laughed nervously, but he took his shirt off anyway.

“I do,” Seonghwa nodded as he took the shirt and folded it before setting it aside.

Hongjoong wanted to ask Seonghwa to strip as well, but he didn’t want it to be taken the wrong way, so he kept his mouth shut.

“Now that it’s half full we’re going to add the bath bomb,” Seonghwa leaned over and gently set the orb in the water.

Hongjoong watched it spin and sputter as purples and blues started to trail out of it. The smell hit his nose, and he let out a satisfied noise.

“They’re always so pretty.” Seonghwa commented. “But for the bubble bar you crush some up in your hand and run it under the water. You need to mix it up in the tub a little as well, so you get good bubbles.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “Noted.”

Hongjoong crossed his arms over his chest and watched as Seonghwa fiddled around with the water. By the time the bath bomb had run itself out there was a mountain of soft smelling bubbles. He was almost too focused on the purple water to notice when Seonghwa started to take his clothes off. Hongjoong only really started to pay attention when Seonghwa threw his shirt into the dirty laundry rather than fold it.

Then there was his underwear. Seonghwa was only wearing a simple pair of black boxers under his date outfit and something about that made Hongjoong’s chest swell with pride. The lingerie was something for him only.

“Is this why you’re always so soft?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded before he stepped into the tub and let the bubbles take over him. “Was the bath an excuse to touch me or have me relax.”

“I didn’t come here thinking about touching you,” Hongjoong frowned. “I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. I was worried.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa said as he sunk down further into the bubbles. “Can you tell me about some of the cute things the kids do?”

Hongjoong smiled as Seonghwa shut his eyes. “Of course I can.”

Hongjoong settled on his knees on the tile next to the bathtub and started to tell little stories about his current and past students. Some were sticky sweet and others funny enough that Seonghwa’s face scrunched up as he tried not to laugh too much. Hongjoong wasn’t sure about the amount of time that passed as he spoke, but he did notice that the bubbles had started to dissipate, and too much of Seonghwa’s golden skin was on display in the now cooling purple water.

“I need to rinse off and wash my hair in the shower.” Seonghwa finally commented.

“I thought I got to wash your hair.” Hongjoong pouted slightly.

“You can get in with me,” Seonghwa smirked at him.

Hongjoong shook his head before he stood up stiffly. “I’m not surviving that.”

“You’re being dramatic,” Seonghwa laughed as he gripped the sides of the tub with each of his hands.

Hongjoong watched in horror as Seonghwa pulled his body out of the water. Each of his muscles was flexed in effort, and Hongjoong wanted to lick the trails of water that were dripping down Seonghwa’s chest to his thighs.

“I don’t think you understand how attractive you are.” Hongjoong forced a laugh and looked away as Seonghwa delicately walked to the shower.

“I’ve been told, several times.” Seonghwa commented as he pressed the right buttons to turn the shower on. “Can you get my robe it’s in the cabinet.”

Hongjoong moved without a word and opened the cabinet. He pulled out a white fluffy robe and grabbed a towel for Seonghwa’s hair. They were quiet as Seonghwa showered and Hongjoong kept himself busy by cleaning up around the tub while Seonghwa finished bathing.

When the shower switched off Hongjoong was there with the towel and the robe. He watched as Seonghwa ran the towel over his body and idly wondered how he could be reincarnated into one of Seonghwa’s towels.

“Puppy Dom can I have my robe?” Seonghwa teased. “You’re staring.”

Hongjoong startled and held out the robe. “Can I put my shirt on now?”

“No, I like the view,” Seonghwa smiled. “I’m not the only attractive one in the room, and you hide your body too much.”

“I don’t hide my body,” Hongjoong whined. “I’m just always focused on you.”

“When you fuck me tomorrow you better be naked.” Seonghwa pointed at him.

Hongjoong did his best to cover his shock at the comment. “About that. Was there anything you wanted to change about the scene or not do anymore after tonight?”

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I’m okay with the scene how we planned it.”

“Even the punishment?” Hongjoong pushed.

“Even the punishment,” Seonghwa nodded. “I deserve it don’t I?”

“You do,” Hongjoong said firmly. “You need to learn how to listen to me.”

Seonghwa smiled, “I think you’re learning that you like brats.”

Hongjoong let out a frustrated puff of air. “I don’t think that’s true.”

“Whatever you say Joongie,” Seonghwa said in a singsong voice. “Make over time.”

Hongjoong shook his head and blindly followed Seonghwa into his bedroom. It was the first time he had ever really been in there and he did his best not to look like he was taking in every detail of the room. The lego display reminded him that his next gift should be one of the sets that Seonghwa had mentioned before.

“Sit on the bed,” Seonghwa pointed. “We can do it there. I don’t want to crouch if you sit at the vanity. I think I even have foundation that will match you. You’re a few shades lighter than me. I should have something for your dark brows too. They give me all sorts of samples. I can order whatever I want too. I get stuff for Wooyoungie and Sannie all the time too.”

“That’s nice of you.” Hongjoong smiled.

“Would any of your friends want anything?” Seonghwa looked back at him.

“Yeosang,” Hongjoong nodded. “Maybe Mingi, he likes that stuff more than he’d admit to, and I think Yunho is extra into him when he has eye make-up on.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa smiled. “Are they on your social media, or can I find them? I’ll get some stuff.”

“You don’t have to do that.” Hongjoong said as he settled in the center of the bed, his legs straight out in front of him.

“I want to do it,” Seonghwa looked back at him seriously with a haul of cosmetics cradled in his arms. “I can get you all some skincare too.”

“I’m not going to use that,” Hongjoong laughed.

“You will if I give it to you.” Seonghwa turned with a frown and stepped towards the bed. He placed everything to Hongjoong’s right before he got on the bed himself. “Just a cleanser and a moisturizer. We’re one of the best brands.”

“I don’t think I can truly stop you from doing anything,” Hongjoong laughed. “Wait what are you doing?”

Seonghwa looked up from where he had straddled Hongjoong’s legs by his knees, “I’m doing your make-up.”

“You don’t need to be in my lap for that.” Hongjoong held his hand out and pressed it against Seonghwa’s chest.

“I’ve had your dick down my throat, you can deal with me in your lap,” Seonghwa rolled his eyes.

“No, that’s why I can’t deal with it.” Hongjoong laughed nervously.

“You’re always so dramatic about dumb things.” Seonghwa laughed before he grabbed Hongjoong’s wrist and scooted the rest of the way up his legs till he was settled straddling Hongjoong.

Hongjoong looked down at where Seonghwa’s robe had fallen open. He itched to touch the smooth skin of Seonghwa’s thighs, but he kept his hands to himself. Whatever they were doing tonight was for Seonghwa. He could take a little flirting, but he wasn’t going to let anything get further than that. It didn’t matter if he was already half hard from the weight of the other man on him.

“Smokey eye with a shimmer I think,” Seonghwa nodded. “You have amazing skin for not taking care of it.”

“Thank you?” Hongjoong laughed. “I guess it’s genetics.”

“Must be.” Seonghwa nodded before he opened a long cylinder and dabbed what Hongjoong could only assume was concealer on a few points on his face. “Never mind the smokey eye. I’ll do something simple. We need to sleep too.”

“I’m just going to wash it off when I go home, you can do what you want.” Hongjoong smiled.

“I’ll be taking pictures when we’re done so my work isn’t wasted,” Seonghwa nodded to himself as he dabbed a sponge over the concealer on Hongjoong’s face before he moved onto a foundation. “I can’t even do a smokey eye anymore even if I wanted to. The fall out would ruin your foundation.”

“Right.” Hongjoong nodded in agreement even though he had no idea what any of that meant.

“Close your eyes,” Seonghwa requested.

Hongjoong shut his eyes and for the first time that night he felt how tired he was. He moved his hands behind him to lean back slightly and let out a sleepy humm.

“We’ll have you in bed soon,” Seonghwa said softly. “You’re being a very good puppy Dom right now. I bet you’d let me do whatever I want.”

“I would,” Hongjoong mumbled. “No dynamic or sex tonight though.”

“I know,” Seonghwa said quietly. “Thank you for coming here with nothing in mind but making sure I was okay.”

Hongjoong wanted to open his eyes to look at Seonghwa, but he didn’t dare to even try when a brush was running over one of his eyelids.

“It’s what I’m here for as your Dom and your friend,” Hongjoong said firmly.

“You think we’re friends?” Seonghwa asked.

“Yes,” Hongjoong wanted to nod but he kept his head still.

“Did you want to be friends after we’re done?” Seonghwa continued to ask. “Open your eyes and look up.”

Hongjoong obeyed the command, “I think if we can be we should be. I want to keep you around and Wooyoung and San.”

“They really like you,” Seonghwa commented. “Wooyoung thinks you’re cute.”

Hongjoong wanted to ask if Wooyoung was the only one who thought he was cute, but he was scared of the answer. He could only take so many compliments from Seonghwa.

“Do you think you’ll watch them again?” Seonghwa asked as he began to swipe a smaller brush under Hongjoong’s eyes.

“I don’t know.” Hongjoong answered honestly. “Sometimes their level of love and intimacy make me feel sad.”

“Oh?” Seonghwa paused and Hongjoong dared to look at his face. Seonghwa’s mouth was turned down into such a pretty frown that Hongjoong wanted to kiss away.

“They have literally everything I’ve ever wanted.” Hongjoong looked away from Seonghwa. “They’re so settled and completely in love. They have an amazing little family, and they figured out how to make kink and whatever other sexual things they want to do fit into that seamlessly. Even as the girls get older, they can just say they’re having date night every Saturday and nothing is weird or obvious. There is just so much love and happiness in that home that it makes me ache for that.”

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa said and breathed out deep enough that Hongjoong felt the breath on his cheeks.

“Don’t listen to me.” Hongjoong closed his eyes again before opening them. “I’m just tired. I don’t know what I’m saying. Tell me about your legos again.”

Seonghwa laughed, “that was the worst deflection ever.”

“Humor me while you finish,” Hongjoong requested.

“They’re just fun,” Seonghwa answered. “It’s relaxing to build the sets, and then I have something to smile at that shows some of my more nerdy interests. I’m worried when I find someone that they’ll make me get rid of them, or that it will be implied that they’re too childish to have.”

“The right person won’t make you get rid of your interests.” Hongjoong frowned. “That’s not how relationships work.”

“Could you imagine having kids and telling them they can’t play with Appa’s toys?” Seonghwa laughed.

“Yes.” Hongjoong said firmly. “Plus, you have them in display cases. It’s not like a toddler could get at them.”

Seonghwa nodded to himself, “some could be played with. When the kids are older.”

“Kids?” Hongjoong smiled.

“Keep your face still,” Seonghwa warned. “And yes, at least two. Maybe more, but no more than four.”

“Adoption or surrogate?” Hongjoong questioned.

“I don’t know yet,” Seonghwa shrugged. “So many kids need homes that a surrogate feels selfish, but to have a child that’s partly mine or my partners feels special too.”

“A problem to figure out another night.” Hongjoong answered quietly.

“Why do you stay teaching and not using your other degree?” Seonghwa asked.

“Oh,” Hongjoong shifted. “I just like where I am right now. It’s not always easy and some of the parents are complete assholes, but I love being in a classroom and working with one of my best friends. I’m not ready to give that up. Plus, I need some training hours, and I don’t know where to fit those in just yet.”

“Do you just like to live with your friends too?” Seonghwa continued to question him.

“Yes,” Hongjoong laughed. “Mingi and Yunho are amazing to live with. They’re not always the most obvious or loud couple either so it makes things easy. Most people would assume they’re just best friends, they don’t do a lot of public displays of affection unless they’re drunk. They were already together when I met them, and I didn’t know they were a couple until one night we were out and Yunho had his tongue down Mingi’s throat. I though my straight friends were going through a gay crisis. Nope, they had already been dating for years.”

Seonghwa laughed at that, “they sound fun.”

“They are,” Hongjoong smiled when Seonghwa pulled away from his face.

“I should get to meet your friends someday, you know mine it’s only fair,” Seonghwa pointed out.

That felt like it was crossing a line, but Hongjoong didn’t want to argue, not tonight. “The chaos of Mingi and Yunho with Wooyoung and San wouldn’t be enjoyable. Then if you add in the twins, it would be a hurricane.”

“It could be fun,” Seonghwa laughed. “I’m all done.”

“Already?” Hongjoong frowned.

“It’s almost three,” Seonghwa smiled. “Okay picture time.”

Hongjoong went to argue but Seonghwa was already pushing him onto his back. Hongjoong went easily and tried not to think about it too much when Seonghwa shimmied further up his body until he was straddling Hongjoong’s hips. He needed this view again, preferably buried so deep in Seonghwa’s ass that the submissive would taste it when Hongjoong came.

“Do a pose,” Seonghwa laughed with is phone aimed at Hongjoong’s face.

All Hongjoong could manage was a pout.

“Okay that’ll do I guess,” Seonghwa laughed harder. “Give me something sexy.”

“I don’t know how to do a sexy face,” Hongjoong whined.

“No, I’ve seen it, you do,” Seonghwa teased. “I guess this is a cute concept.”

“Cute I can do,” Hongjoong nodded to himself and shut his eyes. “I think I need to go and get some sleep.”

“Oh, right,” Seonghwa paused and Hongjoong looked at him. It was obvious that Seonghwa was having some internal debate.

Hongjoong wasn’t ready to spend the night though, even platonically.

“Up.” Hongjoong shifted his hips which knocked Seonghwa off balance.

Seonghwa flopped onto his side, and his robe fell open enough to expose him fully to Hongjoong’s eyes. He didn’t want to look, but he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the sight. Even soft Seonghwa’s cock was so pretty, and it looked like it would fit perfectly in Hongjoong’s mouth.

“Pervert,” Seonghwa laughed before he covered himself up and got off the bed.

“Sometimes.” Hongjoong said as he struggled to stand back up. “Where is my shirt?”

“Here just wear this,” Seonghwa shoved a hoodie at him. “I’m sure it’s colder out than when you got here.”

Hongjoong took the hoodie without argument and put it on. It was obviously designed to be oversized on Seonghwa’s bigger frame, but he felt like a child in it with the bottom coming down to his thighs and the sleeves going far past his fingertips.

Seonghwa was never getting that hoodie back.

“Thanks.” Hongjoong smiled.

“Okay let me call you a car,” Seonghwa offered. “It’s too late for anything else.”

“Thank you,” Hongjoong nodded.

He followed Seonghwa into the living room and quietly watched as Seonghwa tapped away at his phone. A frown hit his face and Hongjoong wondered if he’d be forced to stay the night due to lack of transportation.

“It’s already here.” Seonghwa let out a huff of air.

“Oh,” Hongjoong stumbled to where his shoes were and then held his arm out, palm up towards Seonghwa. “Remember I said not tonight.”

“And I said that I like doing stuff like that though.” Seonghwa whined.

Hongjoong looked at him as he slipped a shoe on, “this isn’t a full time dynamic Seonghwa. If it was, you’d be in a lot more trouble than you currently are.”

The look on Seonghwa’s face made Hongjoong laugh deeply.

“Can we move tomorrow night back by an hour so I can nap before I come over?” Hongjoong asked with his hand on the doorknob.

“Just an hour though,” Seonghwa nodded. “I’m going to work from home tomorrow.”

“Must be nice.” Hongjoong rolled his eyes with a smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow,” Seonghwa nodded.

Hongjoong slipped out of the apartment and only panicked for a second when he realized he didn’t get any information for the car that was picking him up. Seonghwa was prepared though, and Hongjoong got a text with the make, model, color and plates of the car that was picking him up along with the driver’s name.

Once he was in the car Hongjoong let his eyes fall shut. Was that what it would be like to properly date Seonghwa? Would they be silly? Would Seonghwa be cutely demanding while Hongjoong just gave into his every whim? What would it be like to know he could touch Seonghwa whenever he wanted, and keep him safe at all times?

By the time the car pulled up to his apartment Hongjoong was a zombie. He got up to his door without really realizing the path he took, and was surprised when he opened it to see Yunho asleep on the couch. When the door clicked shut Yunho startled away.

“Dude fuck you,” Yunho mumbled. “Have you even looked at your phone?”

Hongjoong cringed, “no?”

“Next time you run out of the house text one of us,” Yunho yawned.

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong answered Yunho’s yawn with one of his own. “Seonghwa needed me. He had a bad date.”

“I can’t even deal with that sentence right now,” Yunho stood up. “But we will be talking about it late.”

“Sure,” Hongjoong shrugged. “That’s fine. After I sleep.”

“Right,” Yunho nodded before he disappeared down the hallway and into his shared room with Mingi.

Hongjoong took his phone out and continued to ignore the texts from Mingi and Yunho. He opened his chat with Seonghwa and let the other man know that he got home safely. Before he could close the chat Seonghwa reacted to the message with a heart.

**

“So, are you going to ask him out or what?”

Mingi’s voice made Hongjoong jump and throw his shoe in surprise.

“What the fuck,” Hongjoong watched as his shoe collided with the wall with a loud thunk. “I didn’t think you were home.”

“Yunho told me where you were last night,” Mingi crossed his arms. “It was a school night.”

“You two are not my parents,” Hongjoong took a moment to recover from his surprise before he moved to grab his shoe off the floor.

“We think you like Seonghwa and that you should ask him out,” Mingi nodded firmly.

“Yeosang said the same thing,” Hongjoong grumbled as slipped his shoe on. “It’s not going to happen, it’s fine. You can all stop suggesting it.”

“Okay sure,” Mingi uncrossed his arms. “Stay emotionally safe out there then. You’re not fun after a breakup.”

“There won’t be a breakup,” Hongjoong shook his head. “We aren’t together. And he just needed help last night it’s not a big deal.”

“So, he called you and not one of his friends?” Mingi shifted.

Hongjoong had been trying to ignore that thought all day long. Seonghwa could have called Wooyoung or San to pick him up. There must have been other people in Seonghwa’s life that he could have called. Still, Seonghwa picked Hongjoong, and he couldn’t shake how important that felt.

“I’m the loser with no life and no family. He just knew I’d be around.” Hongjoong answered. “Anyway, I need to go. I’m already late.”

“Right for your fake sex date,” Mingi nodded.

“It’s a negotiated scene,” Hongjoong made a face.

“I’ll check back in with you later,” Mingi shook his head.

“Sure fine,” Hongjoong opened the door. “You and Yunho can bully me about it later. Invite Yeosang he’d love to join in.”

“It’s not bullying it’s us caring about your mental health,” Mingi frowned.

“No, I know,” Hongjoong sighed. “I love you guys too and all that shit. I just don’t have the time for an intervention right now.”

Mingi laughed, “it’s not an intervention. It’s you owning up to your feelings.”

“I know I like him, it’s not a secret,” Hongjoong sighed. “Which is why I’d like to not be later than I already am.”

“Fine,” Mingi pointed at the door. “Go.”

Hongjoong would have made record time getting to Seonghwa’s apartment if he hadn’t nearly teleported there the night before. He was late. Hongjoong was even later than their new agreed upon star time. There were only a few things in life that annoyed him more than not being punctual.

It wasn’t a surprise when Seonghwa answered the door with a little frown clouding his beautiful features.

“I’m sorry,” Hongjoong said as he stepped inside of the apartment. “I slept longer than I wanted to and then Mingi cornered me on my way out.”

“I understand.” Seonghwa answered quietly as he dropped to his knees. “It’s my fault for calling you and keeping you up so late.”

Hongjoong frowned and pulled his foot away from Seonghwa’s grip, “no, don’t do that. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Without a second thought Hongjoong gracelessly fell to his own knees. He made a noise of discomfort and was relieved to see a small look of shock take over Seonghwa’s frown.

“I didn’t get up when my alarm went off, that’s on me,” Hongjoong nodded as he reached out to place his hands on either side of Seonghwa’s face. “If you’re not feeling great about what happened last night we don’t have to do a scene today, we can just hang out, but please don’t blame yourself for anything. Not what he did, and not me being late.”

“Can you just text next time you’re going to be late?” Seonghwa asked quietly.

“I will,” Hongjoong nodded again this time more firmly. “I’m sorry.”

“Getting on your knees was a little dramatic,” Seonghwa smiled.

“My friends always say that I’m dramatic,” Hongjoong laughed.

“Get back up,” Seonghwa shook his head gently to get Hongjoong to drop his hands. “I want to serve you.”

Hongjoong’s brain screeched to a halt. He wanted to stand up, he wanted to push them straight into the scene, but he had to think about Seonghwa first. There was a chance Seonghwa wasn’t actually in a good place for it, and Hongjoong needed to figure out if he was trying to apologize with his body or not.

“I’m okay,” Seonghwa continued. “I promise. What we have planned will be relaxing.”

“I can skip the punishment,” Hongjoong said with a shrug. His eyes narrowed as he watched Seonghwa’s expression.

“I earned a punishment,” Seonghwa lowered his gaze to the floor.

“Oh?” Hongjoong tilted his head. “Are you trying to be good now?”

“I am.” Seonghwa lifted his eyes and gave a small, mischievous smile. “Now stand up so we can get started.”

“Hold on,” Hongjoong paused. “I want you to know that I will be here for you when you need me. You aren’t a burden, and I’ll stay up all night with you if you need me to, even if it impacts our scene. You are a human before you’re my play partner.”

“That’s,” Seonghwa’s eyes went wide but he looked down before Hongjoong could read into what he might be feeling. “Thank you.”

Hongjoong had more to say, but he decided to let it go. Now wasn’t the time to pour his heart out to Seonghwa. Maybe after the scene he’d push a little harder about how Seonghwa was feeling. With a groan he stood and pushed one foot out towards Seonghwa.

“Remind me of your safe words bunny,” Hongjoong cooed. “Remember it’s okay to use them during a punishment too.”

“Green is go, yellow is slow down and red is stop,” Seonghwa said as he pulled Hongjoong’s shoe off. “And I pinch you if I can’t talk.”

“And what if you can’t use your hands?” Hongjoong asked.

Seonghwa firmly shook his head no three times and made a little noise with each turn of his head.

Such a good boy.

“That’s right,” Hongjoong pushed his other foot towards Seonghwa. “I’ll put my bag away today. I need to set up some things while you’re in punishment.”

“Oh?” Seonghwa looked up at him with bright eyes.

“Yes,” Hongjoong nodded. “Remember what we have planned today.”

“I want it,” Seonghwa smiled and Hongjoong laughed at him.

“How long has it been since you’ve been fucked?” Hongjoong asked without thinking. He wasn’t sure if he really wanted the answer to that question, but it was already out there.

“Not by a toy?” Seonghwa shrugged. “I don’t even know, years? Since before the divorce. I don’t really like casual hook ups.”

Hongjoong let out the breath he had been holding. He could not believe how perfect of an answer that had been.

“Stand up,” Hongjoong reached out and tapped Seonghwa’s head. “And then go and stand in the corner.”

Hongjoong pointed to where the wall met the large windows in Seonghwa’s living room.

“What?” Seonghwa stood up gracefully.

“That’s your punishment,” Hongjoong smiled. “I’ll let you know when you can move but I want your nose touching the wall.”

“That’s,” Seonghwa made a face. “Sir.”

“It’s a punishment Seonghwa, I told you that I don’t do fun punishments,” Hongjoong shrugged. “You don’t learn anything if they’re fun.”

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa nodded.

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa paused, clearly thinking about pushing back, before he finally gave up and padded over to the corner. He settled into the corner and let his head fall forward until his forehead was resting on the wall and his nose was firmly pressed in the corner. Hongjoong was a little amazed that he went without argument, but he wasn’t going to push or taunt his submissive.

“Think about what you did wrong,” Hongjoong stated. “Not that your bad. Think about if those orgasms were worth not listening to me and getting this punishment.”

“Yes Sir,” it was muffled by the wall, and Hongjoong couldn’t help but laugh at Seonghwa’s petulant tone.

Hongjoong decided to set up their scene before doing anything else. He crouched by his bag, and tugged the zipper open. Inside was a spreader bar that had barely fit. After he pulled it out Hongjoong turned it over in his hands, feeling the weight of it. He tried his best to not remember why he had bought it in the first place but that was impossible.

He had bought it years ago, late at night, filled with a hopeful excitement. He imagined using it on his partner who had agreed to every little exploration so far. Instead, his then partner had laughed in his face at the suggestion, and Hongjoong had tucked the bar away, his secret mistake. Two weeks later he left the relationship, clearly they weren’t the one.

Now, as he stood in Seonghwa’s space with the bar resting solidly in his grip, it felt different. There was no shame with Seonghwa. There was only the promise that he’d finally get to use it.

The device was simple with leather cuffs on each end for Seonghwa’s ankles, but there were also two lengths of leather that went up from the middle that would hold Seonghwa’s hands behind his back.

Seonghwa was going to look beautiful bound up for him. Hongjoong could already guess at how his muscles would look as they strained to get free.

Hongjoong let the spreader bar fall onto the coffee table in the living room. It made a loud noise that caused Seonghwa to flinch in surprise, but he didn’t move, and he didn’t say anything. Hongjoong gave him a pleased smile as he considered the three dildos that Seonghwa had laid out. It was easy to pick which one he wanted to use. It was big enough, but still smaller than Hongjoong’s actual cock. He still wanted Seonghwa to feel stretched wide when he finally filled him up.

There was already a blindfold on the table too, and Hongjoong smiled as he ran his fingers over the silk. He wondered if he came with one of Seonghwa’s lingerie sets.

Now that everything was where he needed it, Hongjoong went back to his bag and pulled out his laptop. It was cruel, but he wanted Seonghwa to stand in the corner for at least an hour. Hongjoong knew himself well enough to know that he couldn’t just sit and do nothing for that long. He’d give in. So, he brought his work with him. It wasn’t the sexiest thing he could be doing to get into the right headspace, but he could get through a few of the children’s evaluations before they needed to start.

Seonghwa's body straightened the second Hongjoong started typing. Hongjoong snorted but kept working. He still couldn’t believe that Seonghwa was just doing what he asked. It wasn’t a sexy request, it wasn’t visually appealing, and he knew that Seonghwa had to be uncomfortable by now. Still, Seonghwa was obediently standing in the corner just like Hongjoong had asked him to.

Hongjoong felt the most in control he had ever felt through their entire arrangement. It was weird that it came from a simple punishment, but it was the way Seonghwa had hardly moved a muscle. Seonghwa didn’t always listen to him, he was getting better, but Hongjoong couldn’t help but wonder why this moment was so different.

With a sigh he checked the time and decided to write three evaluations before ending the punishment. A little over an hour later he finished and when Hongjoong looked up as he closed his computer Seonghwa’s body was less tense than it had been at the start, but he still hadn’t moved an inch. The sight made Hongjoong’s heart swell, even if Seonghwa’s head twitched slightly to the side when he heard Hongjoong close his computer.

Hongjoong ignored the action, but smiled to himself at how attentive Seonghwa had gotten. His body had tensed back up and his neck stayed twisted just enough to the side to listen to Hongjoong’s movements.

“Get out of the corner and strip,” Hongjoong ordered evenly. “If you have anything pretty on under that outfit you can leave it on.”

He didn’t watch.

Hongjoong focused on tucking his computer back into his bag before he walked to the closet to put it away. It only took a few moments, but by the time he was done Seonghwa was standing in the middle of the living room with his eyes locked onto the spreader bar and his cock embarrassingly hard in a pair of lacy light blue panties.

“You’re hard?” Hongjoong raised his eyebrows.

Seonghwa nodded.

“Bunny I asked you a question,” Hongjoong shook his head.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa mumbled.

“What got you so hard?” Hongjoong smiled sweetly.

“I was thinking about how I was touching myself, and how I humped the bed for you, and then about what we’re going to do later,” Seonghwa answered quietly.

“Oh,” Hongjoong laughed. “So, no thoughts about how you should listen to me to avoid standing in the corner with a hard, aching cock?”

“No. I did,” Seonghwa rushed to say. “I thought about that too. I’ll be better about being good.”

“Who do your orgasms belong to bunny?” Hongjoong asked as he moved to stand in front of Seonghwa.

“You Sir,” Seonghwa answered quickly as he raised his gaze to make eye contact with Hongjoong.

“These are going to get in the way,” Hongjoong said with a pout as he reached a hand and rubbed a few fingers over Seonghwa’s hard cock. “You look so pretty in them though. Maybe you should get something crotchless so we can leave them on.”

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa answered. “I can do that.”

“Maybe we can dress you up more,” Hongjoong ventured. “Put you in a little skirt and I can just slide your panties to the side before I fuck you.”

Seonghwa instantly turned red, and Hongjoong could only smile. He hoped they had enough time to explore that part of Seonghwa because he doubted anyone else would care. All he wanted for his submissive was for Seonghwa to be as happy and comfortable with himself as possible.

“Okay baby, we’ll talk about that later,” Hongjoong cooed. “For now, get those pretty panties off and kneel on the floor.

Seonghwa obeyed quietly and Hongjoong still wasn’t sure if his easy obedience was good sign or not.

“Color?” Hongjoong asked.

"Green,” Seonghwa turned to look at him with an angry frown.

“Watch your face,” Hongjoong asked. “You’ve had a heavy week, and I’m just checking in.”

“Green,” Seonghwa repeated as he schooled his face.

“Much better bunny,” Hongjoong shook his head. He had to trust that Seonghwa would stop what they were going to do if he needed to.

Hongjoong pushed his body forward and he grabbed the spreader bar. He got on his knees behind Seonghwa and placed the bar between his ankles. Hongjoong manhandled Seonghwa’s legs a little wider as he adjusted the bar before he strapped his ankles in. He then pulled each of Seonghwa’s arms behind his back and cuffed them as well.

“Good?” Hongjoong questioned when he was finished.

“Green,” Seonghwa mumbled.

Hongjoong let out a small laugh at the answer. There was his bratty boy. Just enough resistance to keep things fun. He leaned over and grabbed the blindfold and slipped it over Seonghwa’s face.

“Did this come with one of your pretty lingerie sets?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa answered before he licked over his lips.

“Thought so,” Hongjoong nodded to himself before he stood up.

He took a moment to admire the long lines of Seonghwa’s body and the way his arm muscles were taught as they were tightly, likely on the verge of being uncomfortable, bound behind his back. Seonghwa’s head was tilted up in an instinctual urge to see leaving his long neck on full display.

“You’re beautiful Seonghwa,” Hongjoong commented. “Every inch of you.”

Seonghwa let out a breath but didn’t answer.

Hongjoong looked for a few more moments, before he couldn’t hold back anymore. As much as he’d love to slide into Seonghwa’s body now, he wanted to play with him first. He wanted to see Seonghwa’s body on display for him.

The dildo he had chosen earlier, was a simple flesh tone, with a suction cup on the base. He looked around and realized he’d have to find something to put the dildo on so Seonghwa could ride it. Hongjoong quickly realized that he could just reposition Seonghwa further back off the carpet and stick it to the hardwood floor.

“Move back until you’re on the hardwood,” Hongjoong ordered.

It was a struggle, but Hongjoong didn’t move to help. He watched as Seonghwa’s body awkwardly wiggled from side to side as he shifted backwards.

“Stop when your knees are still on the rug,” Hongjoong commented as he picked up the lube and poured it over the dildo.

Seonghwa froze where he’d been told to, tilting his head toward Hongjoong even though he couldn’t see a thing. His breath came out in a careful, measured rhythm. Hongjoong guess that he was focused on holding himself perfectly still until he was given further instructions.

Hongjoong smiled faintly as he inched closer, even though his chest was tight with nerves. He shifted himself into position behind Seonghwa and steadied himself with a breath. With less confidence than he would have liked, Hongjoong reached out with his slick hand, hesitating for a moment before he slid it carefully between Seonghwa’s spread legs.

The heat there made his pulse quicken.

When Hongjoong’s palm pressed upward, brushing against Seonghwa’s balls, the other man let out a sharp, surprised sound that broke through the tension. For a moment, Hongjoong’s heart lurched, but he forced himself to stay focused. Slowly, he guided two slick fingers back, pressing firmly until they found Seonghwa’s hole.

He wasn’t aware of exactly how Seonghwa’ prepped for their scenes, but he was already running out of patience. Hongjoong pushed one finger inside of Seonghwa's body and smiled at the long satisfied moan the other man let out.

Apparently, he had played with himself before their scene.

“Are you loose or did you get ready for me?” Hongjoong questioned in a bored tone even though his cock was throbbing at how tight Seonghwa felt around his finger.

“I prepped myself,” Seonghwa answered.

“How did you do that?” Hongjoong questioned as he added a second finger. This time Seonghwa’s body tightened up deliciously at the intrusion.

“My fingers,” Seonghwa breathed out. “Sir more please.”

“Your fingers are too delicate for that bunny,” Hongjoong answered as he let his fingers slide from Seonghwa’s body. He reached back for the dildo and smiled to himself. “Sit up on your knees.”

Seonghwa instantly obeyed. He clearly forgot about the dildo and thought he was about to be fucked by Hongjoong. This time Hongjoong didn’t shy away from laughing loudly as he placed the slick dildo down on the floor. He tugged it to make sure that the suction worked and held it straight at the base.

“Sit back on it,” Hongjoong stated firmly.

A pathetic noise left Seonghwa as he sat back and the blunt head of the dildo made contact with his hole.

“Want you,” Seonghwa breathed out. “Sir.”

“And I want to watch you ride this until you’re incoherent,” Hongjoong countered. “Keep going.”

Seonghwa’s face contorted into a pained look of concentration and Hongjoong was instantly thankful for how expressive Seonghwa was. It was easy enough to read Seonghwa’s emotions when he really needed to. The stretch of the dildo obviously hurt, but it wasn’t enough for Seonghwa to stop pushing down on it.

When Seonghwa’s ass hit his hand, Hongjoong let go of the dildo and reached out to wipe his hand off on the fluffy towel that Seonghwa had laid out on the floor.

Seonghwa’s breath was heavy as he moved his head around in an attempt to figure out where Hongjoong was. Hongjoong ignored him and paused to watch the way Seonghwa’s chest rose and fell with his labored breathing before he settled on his knees in front of his submissive.

“Ride it bunny, show me what you can do,” Hongjoong ordered as his hands reached out to roughly grab Seonghwa’s pecs. “Your tits are so nice baby.”

Seonghwa let out a pained noise as he started to bounce on the dildo. His movements were uncoordinated at best, but he was clearly getting pleasure from the toy.

Hongjoong raked his nails down Seonghwa’s chest before he pinched each nipple. He held them between his fingers and tugged on the skin. Seonghwa cried out loudly, and his body stilled.

“Keep going bunny, you know how to be good don’t you?” Hongjoong said in a playful tone. “Make yourself feel good.”

“Sir,” Seonghwa cried out as he started moving.

“We should get you some pretty nipple clamps,” Hongjoong mused. “I didn’t know you’d like this so much.”

He tugged on Seonghwa’s nipples again before he let them go. He placed a few open palmed slaps on Seonghwa’s chest before he reached a hand up to caress Seonghwa’s cheek. Hongjoong lightly slapped Seonghwa’s cheek before he hit it harder a second time.

Seonghwa’s jaw dropped open but his paced quicken on his toy.

What a little masochist.

Hongjoong went back to Seonghwa’s chest, and settled on toying with the other man’s nipples until they were swollen with irritation. To his credit Seonghwa didn’t stop working himself on the dildo. Sometimes his movements slowed, but he never stopped.

“So good for me,” Hongjoong said sweetly before he slapped Seonghwa’s chest and then his cheek again. “You look so pretty when you’re pink.”

“Sir,” Seonghwa cried out. “I can’t, please.”

Hongjoong looked down to Seonghwa’s thighs and smiled when he saw a slight tremor. Seonghwa was pushing himself past his physical limits and Hongjoong knew he’d feel the pain in his muscles for days after their scene. No amount of hot baths or massages would fully sooth the ache in Seonghwa’s thighs.

“Please what bunny?” Hongjoong teased.

“I need you,” Seonghwa cried out. “Please fuck me now, please.”

“I think you can beg better than that,” Hongjoong teased as he stood up.

“No come back,” Seonghwa cried out.

“Did you want me to fuck you or keep playing with you bunny?” Hongjoong laughed. “Make up your mind.”

“Fuck me,” Seonghwa cried out as he sat back on the toy.

“I didn’t tell you to stop,” Hongjoong said before he pulled his shirt off.

Seonghwa ground down against the toy. Hongjoong figured his thighs had finally hit their limit.

“Please fill me up," Seonghwa said in a pleading tone. “Want you not the toy. Please Sir.”

“What if not getting my cock is part of the punishment?” Hongjoong was lying but he wanted to see the reaction.

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head and tried to pull his arms free.

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa’s body, now shiny with a layer of sweat, moved. He had never been so turned on.

“You miss cock in your tight little hole that much?” Hongjoong undid his pants and kicked them off as he spoke. “You want to be stretched and used?”

“Use me,” Seonghwa echoed. “Please Sir, please.”

Hongjoong couldn’t see Seonghwa’s eyes, but he could tell from his tone that he was crying under his mask. He had to put his bunny out of his misery.

“I will,” Hongjoong said confidently. “Sit up again.”

Seonghwa obeyed quickly as Hongjoong kicked his pants and briefs to the side. He bent at the waist and undid the cuffs that held Seonghwa’s arms behind his back.

“Present for me,” Hongjoong ordered.

They hadn’t ever talked about what that meant, but Hongjoong trusted that Seonghwa wouldn’t let him down.

Seonghwa dropped forward first onto his hands and then onto his shoulders. The dildo slid out of his body, and without prompting Seonghwa reached back with his hands and held his ass open. Hongjoong got the perfect view of Seonghwa’s used, pretty, puffy hole. He licked his lips and held back from burying his face in Seonghwa’s ass. That wasn’t what he was there for, and he didn’t want to deal with the bitter taste of the lube.

“Sir please,” Seonghwa whined. “I need it, need you.”

“I know,” Hongjoong said softly.

“Need,” Seonghwa cried out again as Hongjoong bent his knees and lined his cock up with Seonghwa’s slick hole.

Hongjoong sat still, the head of his cock resting firmly against Seonghwa’s hole. It wasn’t long before Seonghwa gave in to his own impatience. He pushed his body back in a slow, deliberate motion. The shift was subtle and needy, but completely unmistakable. Hongjoong’s lips curled into a faint smile at the disobedience. He answered wordlessly, bringing his hand down in a sharp slap across Seonghwa’s ass, the sound cracking through the quiet.

“Sir,” Seonghwa pleaded. “Don’t tease, I’m so good, so good today.”

“You have been,” Hongjoong commented as he leaned forward slightly and ran the hand that wasn’t on his cock up the center of Seonghwa’s back.

Finally, he shifted his hips forward and pushed into Seonghwa’s body. The tight rim gave way to his cock easily and Seonghwa’s warm insides molded to the shape of Hongjoong’s cock. Hongjoong couldn’t help but moan as he bottomed out. Seonghwa’s ass was the most perfect thing that Hongjoong had ever felt. It was made for his cock, there was no other explanation for how good the other man felt wrapped around him.

“Oh god, oh fuck,” Seonghwa chanted. “Fuck me Sir, move please. Oh god please move.”

Hongjoong looked down and noticed that Seonghwa was trembling with the effort to not move. He couldn’t thrust though, not yet, there was no way that Hongjoong wouldn’t cum within seconds if he moved now. It was embarrassing, and he couldn’t let Seonghwa down like that, not during their first time.

“Don’t I feel good,” Seonghwa pressed back even though Hongjoong was as deep as he could go.

“You’re heaven bunny,” Hongjoong said to reassure his submissive.

“Please move,” Seonghwa wailed out. “Please Hongjoong, Sir please.”

“Okay, okay,” Hongjoong pulled back slowly and pushed back in just as slow.

He was torturing himself trying to hold back but Seonghwa’s entire body went boneless the second Hongjoong started to move. Hongjoong continued with his slow movements until his resolve broke and he snapped his hips forward roughly.

“Yes,” Seonghwa cried. “Like that.”

“Oh, bunny, I’ll fuck you however I want,” Hongjoong shook his head.

Luckily for Seonghwa, that was exactly how Hongjoong wanted to fuck him. His hands grabbed Seonghwa’s small waist as an anchor before he started thrusting roughly. Hongjoong’s pace continued to pick up as moans and cries spilled out of Seonghwa’s mouth. There was no doubt in Hongjoong’s mind that the submissive was in another world. This must have been what people meant when they said their submissives were cock drunk.

Seonghwa’s cheek was pressed against the carpet, with his mouth opened, so each noise he let out wasn’t muffled. Hongjoong frowned at the blindfold and paused briefly to lean forward to pull it off. He was met with Seonghwa’s red wet eyes looking right into his own.

“So pretty,” Hongjoong ran the back of his fingers over Seonghwa’s exposed cheek. “Do you want to cum bunny.”

“No,” Seonghwa whined.

“What?” Hongjoong was genuinely surprised by the answer.

“Fuck me forever,” Seonghwa added. “Please Sir.”

“Baby, I can still fuck you, even if you cum.” Hongjoong laughed. “Didn’t you want me to use you?”

Seonghwa just let out a strangled moan as he kept eye contact.

“I want to feel you cum on my cock, don’t you want to give me what I want?” Hongjoong slid a hand from Seonghwa’s waist to grab his hard, hot cock.

“I’m,” Seonghwa’s mouth dropped open wider as he squeezed his eyes shut.

“Cum when you want baby,” Hongjoong said sweetly. “You deserve it.”

Seonghwa couldn’t answer, but Hongjoong didn’t need him to. He ground his hips forward trying to get deeper as he played with the head of Seonghwa’s cock with his fingertips. By now he knew Seonghwa’s body well enough to know that the submissive could cum from what he was doing, and he wasn’t let down. Less than a minute after he started touching Seonghwa’s cock, Hongjoong felt Seonghwa’s cum spilling out over his fingers. Seonghwa was silent, but his body tightened deliciously, and his face contorted into the most beautiful look of pleasure and pain that Hongjoong had ever seen.

Hongjoong gave Seonghwa a few moments to recover before he went back to his previous position holding Seonghwa’s waist. This time he wasn’t gentle. He didn’t know how much overstimulation Seonghwa could handle, and he needed to cum inside of the other man.

“Cum in me,” Seonghwa breathed out. “Fill me up Sir.”

Hongjoong didn’t answer, he couldn’t. Sweat dripped down his temple as he fucked into Seonghwa harder. He had never let himself fully let go with another person before. Hongjoong had always worried about hurting his partners, or going too far. Not with Seonghwa though, Hongjoong knew he could push as far as he needed to and that Seonghwa would let him know if he ever went too far.

It wasn’t long before Hongjoong buried himself as deep in Seonghwa as he could before he came. His fingers gripped Seonghwa’s waist tight enough that he knew the other man would have bruises from the force.

“Mine,” Hongjoong grunted as he came.

“Yours,” Seonghwa replied.

Hongjoong flopped forward over Seonghwa’s back after he came. They were both covered in sweat and breathing hard. He wasn’t willing to pull out yet, even if he had no idea how Seonghwa was still with it enough to support their combined weight. He placed small kisses across the width of Seonghwa’s shoulders before he pulled back.

“No, no, no, stay in,” Seonghwa whined. “Don’t.”

“It’s okay Seonghwa,” Hongjoong said quietly. “We need to be comfortable, we need to get clean.”

“I don’t want to be empty,” Seonghwa whined.

“We can talk about that later,” Hongjoong laughed lightly. “Plus, I’m going to slip out soon anyway.”

“You’re young can’t you go again?” Seonghwa grumbled.

Hongjoong let out a breathy laugh, “pretty sure I just emptied everything I had into you.”

“Good,” Seonghwa hummed.

Hongjoong looked down at Seonghwa’s back fondly before he pulled back and let is softening cock slide out of Seonghwa’s hole. He ignored the disappointed grunt Seonghwa made and focused on freeing Seonghwa’s ankles.

“I can’t move,” Seonghwa groaned as he flopped onto his back on the carpet. “My legs are jelly.”

Hongjoong laughed as he stood up stiffly, “I think I can carry you.”

“What?” Seonghwa’s eyes went wide.

“I’ll just start a warm bath then I’ll try,” Hongjoong offered.

“Be quick please,” Seonghwa shifted. “I don’t think I want to be alone.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “I’ll be quick.”

He heard Seonghwa let out a laugh as he nearly ran to the bathroom. Hongjoong knew from the night before what temperature to start the water at, but he didn’t wasn’t going to use a bath bomb or a bubble bar. He wanted to put something in the water though.

Hongjoong opened the cabinet that Seonghwa had pulled his products out of the night before and was pleased to see a bag of lavender scented Epsom salts. He poured some into the bath before he rushed back out to the living room.

Seonghwa was laying on the floor, his legs spread, one arm over his head, and the other on his chest. His eyes were closed and Hongjoong’s heart ached at the sight. He shook any thoughts away before they could appear and walked over to Seonghwa’s side.

“If you drop me, I’m going to be sad,” Seonghwa warned as he opened his eyes.

“I’ll fall before I drop you. That way you’ll land on me,” Hongjoong laughed and bent down. “Put your arms around my neck.”

Seonghwa did as he was told, and Hongjoong slid an arm under his knees while wrapping the other around his back, holding him close. The moment he lifted him, Hongjoong felt the slight tremble of Seonghwa’s body against his own, the little giggle that escaped, and the way his face pressed into Hongjoong’s neck made his heart sing.

Hongjoong adjusted his hold carefully, and felt the weight of Seonghwa in his arms, the warmth of his golden skin, the soft breath against his collarbone.

“Careful,” Hongjoong murmured, a small smile tugging at his lips. “Almost there.”

Seonghwa giggled again, muffled into his neck, and Hongjoong couldn’t help the small laugh that escaped him.

Getting Seonghwa into the tub, was another challenge. Hongjoong bent at the knees and ended up dumping Seonghwa into the bathtub before he could fall. Seonghwa landed with a splash and another set of loud giggles as Hongjoong went down to his knees on the tile.

“Graceful,” Seonghwa laughed.

“I still did it,” Hongjoong pointed out with a smile. He couldn’t be mad at the teasing, not with how good he felt after that scene.

“Get in,” Seonghwa demanded with a splash.

“Me?” Hongjoong asked dumbly.

“Yes,” Seonghwa laughed. “I want to cuddle while my legs soak. You can wash me in the shower after if you want.”

“You want to cuddle?” Hongjoong asked but his body was already moving and getting into the too hot water.

“That was a lot,” Seonghwa admitted as he moved forward in the tub so Hongjoong could settle behind him.

“In a good way?” Hongjoong asked cautiously as he wrapped his arms around Seonghwa’s chest and pulled the other man backwards into his body.

Seonghwa shifted down into the water and laid his head back on Hongjoong’s chest, “in a very good way. I don’t want to stroke your ego too much but I’m not sure anyone has ever fucked me that well before.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong blinked down at the other man. “You were good too. I’ve never really been able to just let go and use someone and not feel bad or weird about it.”

“I’m glad I could give that to you,” Seonghwa smiled and patted Hongjoong’s arm that was still wrapped around him. “That might be the best scene I’ve ever had.”

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong whined. “You can’t say that if you don’t mean it.”

“You’re a very good puppy Dom,” Seonghwa opened his eyes and looked up at Hongjoong. “We have good chemistry.”

“We do,” Hongjoong smiled down at him, and he honestly couldn’t believe that the man laying against him had been begging for his cock earlier.

“Can I ask for something? You can say no, it’s weird, but I’m kind of into it and I want to try,” Seonghwa rambled out.

“Sure,” Hongjoong splashed a little water over the exposed part of Seonghwa’s chest. “What is it.”

“You know how pee is a big kink for a lot of people?” Seonghwa asked.

Hongjoong looked down at him surprised, “I do.”

“Have you ever thought about it?” Seonghwa asked as he opened his eyes.

“Not really,” Hongjoong answered honestly. “Is that something you want?”

“I’d like to try,” Seonghwa shrugged. “I like it in porn.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong breathed in. “How? There are so many ways to involve watersports in a scene.”

“So, you’re okay with it?” Seonghwa shifted in the water and some of it sloshed over the edge of the tub.

Hongjoong leaned forward to shut the water off, “sure, I’m not disgusted by it or anything.”

“I think bladder control,” Seonghwa admitted quietly. “Maybe with me peeing myself or something like that.”

“While you’re being fucked or just until you can’t hold it anymore?” Hongjoong questioned innocently.

“Oh my god,” Seonghwa groaned and turned to the side slightly so he could bury his face in Hongjoong’s neck.

“What? Those are kind of the only options right?” Hongjoong smiled and rubbed Seonghwa’s arm. “Is there something else?”

“No, you’re just so matter of fact about it and it’s embarrassing to talk about,” Seonghwa spoke into Hongjoong’s neck.

“I’m going to guess that you want to pee while you’re being fucked,” Hongjoong squeezed his arm.

Seonghwa nodded silently.

“Okay,” Hongjoong took a breath. “I can figure that out. We can talk about it on Wednesday.”

“It’s that easy?” Seonghwa moved so he could look at Hongjoong.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Hongjoong was truly confused. “I don’t have it as a limit. It’s kind of a neutral kink for me, but anything that gets me inside of you again is going to be a yes.”

“You’re so,” Seonghwa shook his head.

“Easy?” Hongjoong laughed and Seonghwa laughed with him.

They fell into a comfortable silence, letting the water lap against their bodies as it cooled. Hongjoong held Seonghwa close, feeling the slight shiver that ran through him as the warmth of the bath began to fade. Every so often, they would shift slightly, or he would squeeze Seonghwa gently, a quiet reminder that he was still there, steady and present. Their skin had even started to wrinkle, but Hongjoong didn’t mind.

The deep level of intimacy was unexpected, and Hongjoong found himself letting it wash over him. He let himself indulge in small details of Seonghwa that he’d never focused on before. The way Seonghwa’s hair clung damply to his forehead, the faint rhythm of his breathing, the subtle tilt of his head against Hongjoong’s shoulder.

He knew this wouldn’t last forever, Seonghwa wasn’t his, and that made him cherish the moment even more. Hongjoong allowed himself to lean fully into the closeness, even though that was dangerous. He would carry this quiet and trusting feeling with him, in the back of his head, long after Seonghwa was out of his life.

“We should shower,” Seonghwa said quietly.

“I know,” Hongjoong shifted. “How are your thighs?”

“Sore,” Seonghwa whined. “And you gave me bruises.”

Hongjoong looked through the water to see that he had left finger shaped bruises on Seonghwa’s hips.

“Oops?” Hongjoong shrugged.

“I like them it’s okay,” Seonghwa smiled and leaned up to kiss Hongjoong’s cheek before he pulled himself out of the bathtub.

He was unsteady on his feet but managed to make his way over to the shower and press the correct buttons to get it started.

“We should be quick,” Seonghwa smiled. “I’m already all wrinkles.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong got out of the tub and pulled the stopper so the water could drain. “Do you want me to help you clean up the living room after?”

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head firmly.

“Then I’ll head out when we’re done showing then,” Hongjoong smiled.

They showered quietly, and Hongjoong took his time running his soapy hands over Seonghwa’s body. He broke the silence with little compliments as he moved over each area of Seonghwa’s body.

When it came time for it, he ran two fingers between the cheeks of Seonghwa’s ass and over his hole. Seonghwa gave a nod and Hongjoong’s breath caught in his throat as he slipped his fingers into Seonghwa with the intent to clean him out. It wasn’t needed, but it was another layer of intimacy that they were both clearly craving.

When the shower was done, Hongjoong went to the living room and pulled his clothes back on in silence as Seonghwa started to clean up with just the towel wrapped around his waist.

“You can leave this here,” Seonghwa held up the spreader bar.

“Okay,” Hongjoong agreed easily. “I guess I should head out?”

“Yeah sure,” Seonghwa looked at him, and there was something in his eyes that made Hongjoong want to stay. “Let me do your shoes.”

“I can do them. You only have a towel on,” Hongjoong held up his hand. “Go get my bag.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa easily agreed.

By the time Hongjoong had slipped both of his shoes on Seonghwa was by his side with his bag.

“Hongjoong?” Seonghwa licked over his bottom lip nervously.

“Yeah?” Hongjoong smiled at him.

“Thanks for everything this week,” Seonghwa looked down. “You really helped last night and tonight.”

“I told you I’ll always be around if you need me,” Hongjoong smiled.

“I believe you,” Seonghwa lifted his eyes. “And I don’t normally believe people when they say that.”

Hongjoong wanted to pick at that scab. He wanted to know who had caused Seonghwa to distrust people, he needed to know who hurt him so he could fix it.

“I’m glad you trust me,” Hongjoong said honestly. “It means a lot to me.”

“That’s good,” Seonghwa offered him a smile. “I’ll see you on Wednesday?”

“Of course,” Hongjoong gave him an awkward wave before he opened the door and left the apartment.

Chapter Text

Hongjoong dragged his tired body out of bed around noon on Sunday and struggled to make himself look presentable. He had slept nearly all day Saturday and still wasn’t sure if his sluggishness was due to the lack of sleep or how much had gone on during the scene with Seonghwa the night before. In his waking moments he thought about Seonghwa watching the twins, smiling, happy, but moving slowly and carefully because of his aching body.

The thought made Hongjoong ashamed of himself, he didn’t need to think of Seonghwa in domestic situations. That wasn’t for him, and it wasn’t going to be for him. Knowing better didn’t stop him from dreaming about a life that was just out of reach though.

“Oh, you’re alive.” Yunho commented when Hongjoong finally pulled himself out of his bedroom.

“Do I look terrible?” Hongjoong held his arms out. His pants were overly baggy, but his long sleeve shirt clung to his torso.

“Are you seeing Seonghwa again today?” Yunho asked without answering Hongjoong’s question.

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I have to go talk to Wooyoung.”

Sometime in the mess of the day before, Hongjoong had been awake enough to drink some water and answer a few messages. There were no messages from Seonghwa, which was typical, but a message from Wooyoung had popped up later in the day. Hongjoong easily agreed to meet up Sunday after lunchtime so that they could talk. He needed some kind of guidance for what Seonghwa wanted to do the next weekend anyway. While he wasn’t fully disgusted by the idea of bladder control, he didn’t know where to start.

“We are being replaced, aren’t we?” Yunho frowned.

“No?” Hongjoong titled his head. “I live with you. I can’t replace you.”

“You like them more,” Yunho nodded with a small smile. “Because they’re into your kink shit.”

“No,” Hongjoong said more firmly. “It’s a different kind of friendship there. Plus, I know you and Mingi don’t want to hear about my sex life.”

“Does Wooyoung get off on knowing what you’re doing with his friend?” Yunho asked innocently but with a teasing edge.

“I don’t think so,” Hongjoong laughed as they moved into the living room. “It’s like he just knows more, and has done more, and has resources. He’s fun too. San is great, they’re a cute couple.”

“So, you’re replacing us as your favorite couple,” Mingi chimed in from the couch. 

Hongjoong groaned and buried his face in his hands as Yunho laughed, clearly delighted by the exchange.

“I’m not replacing anyone,” Hongjoong grumbled.

“Then we can meet your friends?” Yunho pushed.

“Maybe,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Listen, I don't know if these people are going to be in my life two weeks from now, never mind months from now. You don’t need to meet them, they’re not permanent.”

“I didn’t know,” Yunho held up his hands. “I was just teasing you.”

“It’s fine,” Hongjoong shook his head. “It is what it is. I’m having fun, but nothing is going to stay. I’m just trying to enjoy it all while I can.”

“Is that the best for your mental health?” Mingi questioned quietly.

“My mental health is fine,” Hongjoong offered with a smile. “Everything is good up here.” He tapped his head.

Yunho and Mingi gave each other a pointed look and Hongjoong chose to ignore it. He was fine. He knew that what was going on between him and Seonghwa wasn’t permanent. They didn’t interact much beyond their scenes so there was no reason for him to stay in Seonghwa’s life. It didn’t matter if Seonghwa wanted it now, they’d start to drift the second Seonghwa’s focus shifted to dating someone seriously. It only made sense. Why would you want to hang out with your former Dom if you had the love of your life right there?

Wooyoung and San were different, but it was the same thing. There wasn’t anything that linked them together. They’d drift away too and that was just going to have to be fine. Maybe he’d see them sometimes if Yeosang did manage to build a friendship with them.

“I’ll be back later,” Hongjoong said quietly as he slipped his shoes on.

“Okay, well, tell them to send you home with food.” Mingi called out. 

Hongjoong laughed. “I’m sure they will. San doesn’t think we can take care of ourselves.”

“Well,” Yunho gestured towards Hongjoong which made Mingi break out in a series of deep giggles.

“You both suck,” Hongjoong pointed at them before he reached for his wallet and shoved it into his pocket.

“Have fun,” Mingi called out as Hongjoong left the apartment.

The trip to San and Wooyoung’s home felt quicker than it had any other time. Hongjoong had put on his headphones to help force the noise of his thoughts out of his head. His only focus was on the beats in his ears and the way they rattled around in his brain. He made a quick stop at the cafe at the bottom of their street before he headed up towards the couple’s home. Hongjoong knew he could come empty handed, but he didn’t want to arrive with a coffee for himself and nothing to offer the small family. So, he got a collection of cookies that they could snack on throughout the week.

The door was flung open before Hongjoong could even ring the bell. He was greeted by a smiling Wooyoung who was carrying one of the babies on his hip. She looked perfectly comfortable and offered him a big smile.

“You look terrible,” Wooyoung laughed.

“Just tired,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I don't sleep well.”

“And I hear the end of your week was busy,” Wooyoung commented as he moved so Hongjoong could enter the home.

“Yeah well,” Hongjoong shrugged. He didn’t want to say too much. Hongjoong had no idea exactly how much Seonghwa confided in the couple, and he didn’t want to give more away than he needed to, or more than what Seonghwa would want him to say.

There was a loud happy yell to his right and Hongjoong looked up from the shoe he was untying. His heart stopped for a moment before it started to pound wildly in his chest. Seonghwa was there, sitting on the couch, with a baby standing on his legs babbling happily. 

“Oh yeah Seonghwa’s here,” Wooyoung said like it wasn’t a big deal.

Hongjoong was still frozen.

“Hi Hongjoong.” San said from his spot beside Seonghwa.

Hongjoong hadn’t even noticed him.

He watched silently as Seonghwa passed the baby to San before he stood up. Hongjoong fumbled to get his shoes off, scared of what Seonghwa might do.

“Did you sleep at all?” Seonghwa asked once he was standing next to Hongjoong.

“Yeah,” Hongjoong waved his arm. “Maybe too much?” He laughed awkwardly.

“Make sure you take care of yourself,” Seonghwa smiled. “Or you won’t be any use to me.”

Hongjoong couldn’t talk, he just nodded and held out the bag he was holding.

“I’ll take that,” Wooyoung plucked the bag out of his hand and when Hongjoong looked at him he didn’t like the way Wooyoung was grinning at all.

“Seoha, isn’t Hongjoongie being silly,” San cooed to the baby he was holding before he tickled her.

“Hongjoongie is always silly,” Seonghwa commented with a large smile before he turned away from Hongjoong and moved towards the baby to scoop her up.

She let out a squeal and began laughing uncontrollably as Seonghwa flung her around in the air. His grip was strong under her arms, but it had to feel like she was flying. Seonghwa looked radiant as he played with her. Their smiles were both so wide it looked like they had to hurt, but Hongjoong couldn’t help but notice the delicate way Seonghwa was moving.

He was going to be sick. He shouldn’t be here, he shouldn’t be seeing Seonghwa like this.

“Did you want a baby?” Wooyoung asked from behind him.

Hongjoong turned and looked at Wooyoung without answering.

“I mean this one, right now,” Wooyoung held out his daughter. “She’s a little more shy. Isol do you want to hang out with Hongjoongie?”

The baby looked at him with bright eyes and Hongjoong gave her a small smile. He wasn’t going to force the child to go to him, but he was okay with it if she wanted to. A few moments later she made up her mind and held out her little hands towards Hongjoong.

“You have been chosen,” Wooyoung commented as he held her out towards Hongjoong.

Hongjoong reached out for her and she instantly cuddled up to his chest. He held her with an arm under her butt and he placed his other on her back gently.

“That’s cute,” San commented.

“Kids like me,” Hongjoong commented as he walked a little deeper into the house.

“Do you have younger siblings?” San asked.

“Just an older brother,” Hongjoong answered.

“A natural,” Wooyoung commented enthusiastically. 

Hongjoong laughed, “it’s not hard to hold a baby, don't give me too much credit.”

“She’s already half asleep on you,” San pointed out. “So, you’re at least comforting.”

“I guess,” Hongjoong shrugged as much as he could with the baby laying on him. Her little head was tucked into his neck. He wasn’t completely sure how she was breathing but she seemed very content where she was.

“It’s just about naptime,” Wooyoung commented.

Hongjoong dared to look at Seonghwa. He was now cradling Seoha and she looked as sleepy as the twin he was holding. The baby wasn’t what made his breath catch in his throat though. Seonghwa was completely focused on him, and didn’t flinch when they made eye contact. Hongjoong was sure that he was seconds from a heart attack. Seonghwa’s eyes were soft but completely focused as he took in the image of Hongjoong holding Isol. Hongjoong would have given anything to know what was going through Seonghwa’s mind. Was he considering Hongjoong as a father?

“Hey Hongjoong?” Wooyoung asked with a laugh.

“What?” Hongjoong looked away from Seonghwa to Wooyoung.

“It’s naptime.” Wooyoung laughed more. “Did you want to be put down with the girls?”

“Maybe,” Hongjoong shook his head with a wide smile on his face. “I think she’s already out, I can carry her to her bed if you want.”

“Perfect,” Wooyoung smiled. “Seonghwa give me Seoha.”

“I can go with Hongjoong,” Seonghwa made a face. “I know where their room is.”

The look between Wooyoung and San didn’t go unnoticed, but Wooyoung immediately backed down.

“Okay, well get to it,” Wooyoung gestured. “Hongjoong you can meet me in the office after, okay?”

“Yeah sure,” Hongjoong nodded.

Seonghwa shot Wooyoung a pointed look before he moved to walk down a hallway Hongjoong had never been down. He followed closely behind Seonghwa without saying anything. This was too close to his fuzzy dreams from Saturday for him to be comfortable with what was going on. This was too domestic, it wasn’t something he should be experiencing with a play partner. Then again, they had already crossed so many lines on Thursday that it didn’t matter anymore.

“Seoha has her bunny,” Seonghwa commented as he laid the baby he was holding into her crib. “I gave it to her, and she can’t sleep without it.”

“Cute,” Hongjoong smiled.

“Isol has her bear,” Seonghwa reached out to take the baby from Hongjoong.

“I can do it,” Hongjoong smiled and moved towards the empty crib.

After he laid her sleeping body down, he looked back up towards Seonghwa who was looking at him in the same focused way as he was in the living room. Hongjoong wanted to kiss him. Softy, not with any intent other than to be close to each other and show how much he adored the other man. They didn’t do that though, and Seonghwa wasn’t his to be kissing.

“Jongho gave her the bear,” Seonghwa said before he looked away from Hongjoong.

“The kid from your work?” Hongjoong looked at him amused.

Seonghwa nodded, “he grew up next door to San. San’s mother helped take care of Jongho’s when he was born and they stayed very close.”

“A nepotism hire,” Hongjoong let out a quiet breathy laugh.

Seonghwa grinned, “kind of. We hired him right out of school as an entry level job. He's been working his way up.”

Hongjoong nodded, “did you watch the babies yesterday?”

“Of course,” Seonghwa nodded. “San and Wooyoung came back late so I slept in their guest room. I didn’t feel like going home, I guess I still don’t.”

Hongjoong made a face. There was something unsaid there, but he didn’t know if he should push further. It might have been none of his business.

“Living alone can be hard,” Hongjoong settled on saying. “The quiet must be nice though.”

“I’m over it,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I want noise and love in my house.”

Hongjoong’s breath caught in his throat.

“Even you have your roommates, right? I’m sure you love them, and they help make your apartment feel warm,” Seonghwa added to his thoughts.

“They do,” Hongjoong nodded. “They’re also insanely annoying. They want to meet Wooyoung and San and I’m just not ready for that kind of chaos.”

Seonghwa nodded, “will you introduce them someday?”

“I don’t know,” Hongjoong shrugged and looked at the doorway. “I don’t feel comfortable merging these two parts of my life when I don’t know if this side of things is going to be permanent. It’s one thing for me to miss people, it’s another thing for me to bring people into my friend’s lives. When this is done, we’ll all have to mourn what could have been. It’ll be easier if it’s just me missing everyone.”

Seonghwa’s face twisted up like he had been hit and Hongjoong wanted to take his words back. He was just so used to being honest with Seonghwa that he couldn’t stop now.

“Seonghwa?” San’s voice came from the doorway.

“Yes?” Seonghwa turned away from Hongjoong with the same sour expression on his face. 

“Come help me start dinner.” San nodded his head towards the hallway. “Youngie wanted to talk to Hongjoong about your demands.”

Hongjoong smiled as Seonghwa’s cheeks quickly turned pink.

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Seonghwa said as he turned back to Hongjoong.

“I know,” Hongjoong smiled. “I won’t.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa nodded, and his shoulders slumped a little before he walked out of the room.

Hongjoong stood alone in the room for a moment before he moved to the window to close the curtains a little to block some of the bright light from the afternoon. He took a few breaths before he navigated through the house to the office. When he passed the kitchen he could hear San and Seonghwa talking to each other quietly. It didn’t sound like an argument, but it did sound tense. He paused, not to listen, but to debate if he should step in. Common sense won, and Hongjoong left it alone and continued to the office.

“Did you get lost?” Wooyoung commented as Hongjoong walked in and shut the door behind him.

“No,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” Wooyoung smiled and pointed to the chair he had put next to his own for Hongjoong. “I hear Seonghwa gave you an interesting request.”

“Oh yeah.” Hongjoong nodded. “I’m okay with it, I’ve just never considered it at all.”

“You know.” Wooyoung smiled. “That’s something Seonghwa would only whine about wanting to do when he was drunk in his twenties. I didn’t even know it was something he still wanted to try.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong blinked. He was not going to let himself think about what that meant.

“He won’t be mad if you don’t want to do it,” Wooyoung commented.

“I know,” Hongjoong nodded. “I’m neutral about it as a kink. I don’t think it’s dirty or anything, it’s just pee. I’ve just never considered it before. It’s just not something I personally get off to.”

“That’s a healthy way to look at it,” Wooyoung nodded. “I might suggest watching porn for this one.”

“What?” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide.

Wooyoung laughed at him. “You know, porn. Do you not watch porn?”

“No, I do,” Hongjoong waved his hand. “I just didn’t consider it to be educational.”

“It can be,” Wooyoung laughed. “I have a website that’s pretty good for kink content and it’s all safe and consensual and all that. It has a section for piss porn, it should help.”

“That sounds good,” Hongjoong nodded. He could handle watching some porn. That was easy.

“I don’t know exactly what he asked for,” Wooyoung started. “And you don’t have to tell me the details if you don’t want to.”

“Just some desperation stuff,” Hongjoong commented, cutting off Wooyoung. “I think he wants to let go while I’m in him.”

“You’re fucking?” Wooyoung looked at him surprised.

“We’re doing sexual scenes,” Hongjoong made a face. “Wouldn’t that imply that we’re having sex?”

“Yeah, but I mean,” Wooyoung paused and waved his hands. “You’re having penetrative sex?”

“Yes,” Hongjoong nodded. “Only once so far, but that’s a part of it.”

“Okay,” Wooyoung made a face to himself and Hongjoong wondered if he had said too much.

“Is that bad?” Hongjoong sat up straighter. “Should we not be doing that?”

“No no,” Wooyoung shook his head firmly. “I just didn’t think he’d be into that so soon. Seonghwa has always moved at a glacial pace with everyone, even his ex-husband.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong breathed out. “Then why is he trying to date and marry someone to have kids with so quickly?”

Wooyoung choked on air at the question. It was clear from the expression on Wooyoung’s face that he had an opinion, but Hongjoong didn’t want to hear it. He scrambled to interrupt before Wooyoung could say anything.

“Wait, don't answer that,” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide. “Talking to you isn’t to gossip about Seonghwa, it's just to learn. What we talk about is for my future partners as well.”

“Your future partners?” Wooyoung questioned with a hoarse voice from his coughing.

“Well, yeah,” Hongjoong nodded firmly. “Seonghwa isn’t my forever. He’s still dating. It’s amazing he hasn’t picked anyone yet.”

“Right,” Wooyoung nodded. “It’s an absolute mystery why he wouldn’t be interested in these guys.”

“I know,” Hongjoong nodded eagerly. “I’m just lucky he hasn't, because it means that I have more time with him. So, if he wants some piss play, I’m more than happy to do that for him.”

“Hongjoong,” Wooyoung said slowly and carefully. “Do you think you…”

“Don’t finish that,” Hongjoong held up his hand. “I’ve never had a thought before in my entire life, and I’m not going to start now.”

Wooyoung let out a loud cackle of a laugh and doubled over into Hongjoong’s lap. Hongjoong smiled and slapped his back lightly as the other man clung to his waist and while he laughed. When Wooyoung calmed down he popped up with a bright smile.

“I think you just need to make sure wherever you’re doing this is waterproof,” Wooyoung said with a bright tone left over from his laughing.

“I think I trust Seonghwa to take care of that,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I’ll mention it to him though.”

“I’ll text you the website,” Wooyoung nodded. “Anything else you want to talk about?”

“I think we’re eventually going to need to talk about harder impact play,” Hongjoong shrugged. “He likes it rough.”

“I know,” Wooyoung nodded. “I’m sure you can handle doing that for him though.”

“I can,” Hongjoong nodded quickly. “I don’t even know if it’s a sadist thing. I’m not getting off on causing him pain, I’m getting off on giving him what he wants.”

Wooyoung nodded, “service Dom.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Hongjoong laughed. “I like the kinky stuff, I like the control, but I’m mostly enjoying giving him every last thing he wants. When what he needs lines up with what I’m asking him to do and he’s clearly in a good headspace that’s the best.”

“I get that,” Wooyoung grinned. “I only ever want to give Sannie exactly what he wants.”

“I mean,” Hongjoong laughed. “If my husband looked like that, I’d give him everything he wants too.”

Wooyoung laughed and reached out to shove Hongjoong’s shoulder. “We haven’t banned you from our bed just so you know.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help but blush, “I haven’t even considered that.”

“That’s something for the future anyway,” Wooyoung smiled.

“Sure sure,” Hongjoong laughed. “Let this thing with Seonghwa run its course first then we can talk about it.”

“What if…” Wooyoung started again.

“No what ifs,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’m not doing hypotheticals when it comes to Seonghwa.”

“That’s fair,” Wooyoung nodded. “I don’t blame you.”

“Anyway, do you have any other amazing advice other than to watch porn?” Hongjoong laughed.

“Don’t push yourself too far for him,” Wooyoung shrugged. “He respects you too, and everything doesn’t always need to line up.”

“I guess I’m curious. I didn’t mark it as a limit or anything which might be why he brought it up,” Hongjoong breathed out. “I won’t go past my comfort zone for him.”

“I think you would.” Wooyoung shook his head.

“Okay I’ll try not to go past my comfort zone for him.” Hongjoong corrected.

“We all do some weird things when we care about people,” Wooyoung shrugged. “It’s just important that it’s mutual.”

Hongjoong let the comment slide. It would be stupid to say he didn’t care about Seonghwa. He had to care about the other man to do the things that they did.

“Do you want to stay for dinner?” Wooyoung offered.

“No,” Hongjoong answered with a shake of his head. He didn’t know if he could deal with seeing Seonghwa outside of their preplanned weekly visits for too much longer. “My roommates feel neglected.”

“I’m sure they do.” Wooyoung nodded. “Then I guess I’m going to kick you out because we’re going to eat soon.”

“That’s okay.” Hongjoong laughed as he stood up. “I get it.”

“You can always hang out with us.” Wooyoung mentioned. “We’re your friends now.”

“No, I know,” Hongjoong held his hand up and nodded even if he didn’t believe what Wooyoung was saying. “I just don’t want to push to far you know? And I don’t know if Seonghwa is okay with me being here.”

“Seonghwa doesn’t care,” Wooyoung said quickly as he scrambled to stand up. “I don’t think he’d be calling you outside of your scenes if he didn’t want you in his life. I would have told you to stay home if I thought he’d be uncomfortable having you around.”

Hongjoong’s eyes went wide before he recovered and just nodded. Wooyoung wasn’t wrong but he was going to ignore the statement anyway.

“You need to say goodbye before you leave,” Wooyoung demanded. “Sannie says he doesn’t get enough time with you.”

“I can hang out more,” Hongjoong offered.

“When Seonghwa isn’t around,” Wooyoung pointed out.

Hongjoong stayed silent. He was used to his friends calling him out, but he didn’t know how he felt about Wooyoung doing the same thing. 

“Thought so,” Wooyoung laughed to himself.

Hongjoong silently followed him to the kitchen. San and Seonghwa were still talking quietly as Seonghwa chopped up some vegetables and San adjusted the cooking temperature on the oven.

“Hongjoong has to leave,” Wooyoung commented.

“What?” San raised his head with a pout.

“Roommates,” Hongjoong shrugged. 

“Tell them to come over for dinner too,” San said with the pout still on his face.

Hongjoong wanted to say yes. He knew if he texted their roommate group chat that the other two men would be there quickly, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it.

“Maybe next time,” Hongjoong smiled.

San’s pout dropped into a frown and Hongjoong couldn’t even bring himself to look at Seonghwa. He didn’t want to know what kind of a look he’d find on the other man’s face.

“Okay well I have some leftovers from last night that you can take home,” San commented.

“I cooked those for you,” Seonghwa cut in.

“And we won’t eat them because you’re cooking for us now,” San commented back in an overly cheery tone. “It’s fine it’s like you get to take care of Hongjoong. I’m sure that appeals to you.”

Hongjoong’s eyes stayed locked onto San’s smiling face as he moved to the fridge. He was so scared of what he might find written in Seonghwa’s expression.

“It’s just jjigae,” Wooyoung commented.

“That I made with love for your family,” Seonghwa said and Hongjoong could hear the pout in his tone.

“And now we’re lovingly donating it to Hongjoong’s family,” San laughed. 

Hongjoong’s eyes finally darted to Seonghwa and they caught on the pleased expression on his face, not the way his arms were folded across his torso. He was only playing at being annoyed.

“Thank you,” Hongjoong mumbled out. “I promise we can take care of ourselves though. We’ve managed to stay alive for a long time.”

“Let him be domestic.” Wooyoung laughed. “He likes it.”

“I hope so, because the whole husband and kids thing is very domestic.” Hongjoong laughed. “It seems nice though.”

“You should babysit with Seonghwa someday,” San commented. “You’ll see it can be a nightmare.”

“Those girls are angels,” Seonghwa gasped. “They’re always good for me.”

“That’s a lie.” San looked at Hongjoong. “A few weeks ago, we had panicked messages that Seoha wouldn’t stop screaming. When we got home, she was still at it. Her sister was sleeping soundly like nothing was happening.”

“What did she want?” Hongjoong made a little face.

“Her fathers.” Seonghwa answered evenly. “She calmed down the second they got home.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong nodded. “That’s hard.”

Seonghwa nodded and looked away from him. Hongjoong didn’t get a chance to say anything else because San was actively shoving a bag with food into his arms.

“Eat well,” San smiled. “And come over soon.”

“I will.” Hongjoong nodded. “I promise.”

“Good.” San nodded. “Youngie come wake up the girls with me, Seonghwa can see Hongjoong out.”

“Okay.” Wooyoung nodded.

Soon Hongjoong was left alone with Seonghwa.

“They do think of you as a friend,” Seonghwa said softly.

“For now, I know,” Hongjoong gave him a tight smile. He didn’t want to talk about it further. “I should get going.”

“Yeah.” Seonghwa’s eyes went wide for a moment before he wiped his hands off on a towel. “I’ll walk you out.”

“Sure,” Hongjoong breathed out and turned to head towards the front door. He could feel Seonghwa behind him, but he didn’t say anything.

Seonghwa stood a safe distance from him while he put his shoes on.

It was awkward, and Hongjoong didn’t know how to break the feeling.

“We’re good for Wednesday?” Hongjoong asked to cut through the silence and some of the tension that was starting to build up.

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “I like our Wednesday meetings.”

“Me too,” Hongjoong admitted quietly.

“I’ll see you then,” Seonghwa said quietly.

Hongjoong wanted to wrap Seonghwa up in a tight hug to say goodbye, but he couldn’t seem to will his body to move. With a smile and a nod, he left the house and took in a deep breath of fresh air.

“Fuck fuck fuck,” Hongjoong chanted to himself as he headed down the hill back to the main road. “What the fuck is wrong with me?”

When he was on the train, he made the decision to stop at the mall before he went back home.

It was easy to find the Lego store. It was bright and loud in a way that made Hongjoong feel a little on edge. There were kids running around despite the later hour, and he had no idea what he was looking for. He had taken notes of what Seonghwa said he wanted, but he had no idea how to find the sets.

“Can I help you?” A man in a bright yellow apron asked him.

“Do you have these?” Hongjoong pointed at the two Animal Crossing sets he had written down from when Seonghwa was showing him his collection.

“We do,” the man smiled. “I can get them for you. Do you need anything else?”

“Um,” Hongjoong looked around and his eyes settled on a display of flowers. He quickly reached out and grabbed a box that was labeled as Wildflower Bouquet.

“Here, I’ll take that and meet you at the register,” the man offered with his hand held out.

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded dumbly. 

What was he doing? Was this him spoiling his submissive or just spoiling Seonghwa? He knew he didn’t need to apologize for being so awkward at Wooyoung and San’s house, but he just couldn’t help himself.

By the time he made his way to the register the employee was already there with three boxes waiting expectantly. Hongjoong smiled and nodded as he went to stand closer to the register. The total was more than he was expecting, but still within whatever imaginary budget he had put in place for the spontaneous shopping spree.

“Can I have a reusable bag please?” Hongjoong asked.

“It will cost more,” the man informed him with a smile.

“That’s fine,” Hongjoong nodded firmly. “I’d still like it.”

The man packed everything up for Hongjoong and he fled the mall. He didn’t want to think about the gifts or what he was doing, and he didn’t know if he could even face giving them to Seonghwa himself. It was just a gesture from a Dom to his submissive. Hongjoong was there to take care of Seonghwa and that included his interests as well. It was a cute hobby, and Hongjoong understood how putting together the little block buildings could be relaxing even if it seemed like a tedious nightmare to him.

Then he found himself at a familiar flower shop, determined to make another reckless decision.

“We’re closing,” the ajumma called out before she saw him.

“I’ll be quick,” Hongjoong mumbled.

“Ah the fool in love returns,” the woman commented when she saw him.

Hongjoong didn’t correct her, “can you deliver this bag with the flowers?” He held up the lego bag.

“Can I put it in a nicer bag?” She asked.

“No, he’ll like this one,” Hongjoong made a face at the yellow bag.

“Then we’ll give him yellow flowers,” she came out from behind the counter and took the bag from his hands. “Do you know what kinds you want?”

“I don’t know,” Hongjoong shrugged. “I’m not good at this.”

“But you’re trying,” she laughed.

“I am,” Hongjoong nodded.

“I hope he does nice things for you,” she commented as she turned to her cooler to pull out some flowers. “White and yellow roses, a few white peonies, and now we need something for a pop of color.”

“I like those lavender colored ones,” Hongjoong pointed.

“The asters?” She smiled. “The name means star.”

“Of course it does,” Hongjoong swallowed. “Do those match with the rest?”

“I can make them work,” She smiled and put together a few of the flowers. “Is this good?”

“I trust you,” Hongjoong smiled and held out his credit card for her.

“You’re a good man.” She commented as she shuffled over to her register. “I’ll skip the delivery fee this time.”

“You don’t need to do that,” Hongjoong laughed. “I gave you extra to deliver.”

“My gift to you,” she smiled. “Don’t argue with me, just say thank you.”

“Thank you,” Hongjoong nodded obediently. 

“Okay here you are,” she handed him back the card. “We’ll bring him these things tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” Hongjoong gave her a deep bow.

“Now go so I can close,” she shooed him with her hands.

Hongjoong laughed and rushed back out of the store.

What the fuck was he doing?

**

Hongjoong had spent the start of the week full of anxiety, his new normal. On Monday it took all of his self control to not go back to the flower stop and demand the lego set back and the flowers to be cancelled. It was too much, and he knew it was too much. Seonghwa didn’t know Hongjoong well enough to know that he liked to spoil the people he cared about. Even if they were just someone he casually encountered daily, he liked to show them he appreciated their effort. He was even trying to figure out something to give to the flower ajumma. It was just who he was, and he didn’t want Seonghwa to think he was trying for more when he wasn’t. Seonghwa was just his submissive, and that was all there was to their relationship. 

By Tuesday Hongjoong had let some of his anxiety go. Seonghwa hadn’t sent him an angry message so Hongjoong figured he couldn’t have done anything too bad. The gift wasn’t too extravagant, this time. He knew the weekly gifts were only going to escalate though. Could he go back to just flowers after sending three lego sets? Should he have spread them out over the next few weeks? What if he did that and had a set or two left over after they were done that he couldn’t return?

On Wednesday Hongjoong got to Seonghwa’s office with fifteen minutes to spare. Hongjoong set down a cup of coffee and a bag on Jongho’s desk with a grin. The least he could was bring the younger man a treat to help him get through his afternoon.

Jongho looked up at him unimpressed but took the cup and the bag anyway. Hongjoong watched as he looked inside of the bag and smiled before he forced it back down for effect.

“Thank you, I guess,” Jongho mumbled.

“No problem,” Hongjoong said with an easy smile.

“Can I ask you a question?” Jongho asked after a few quiet moments, fiddling with his cup.

“Yeah, sure,” Hongjoong replied, leaning his elbow on the counter.

“How did you tell Seonghwa you liked him?” Jongho began, and Hongjoong’s heart dropped into his stomach. “I mean, it’s hard when it’s another man, right?”

“We’re not,” Hongjoong said quickly, waving his hands in front of him. “I mean, I am, and I guess you know he is, but we aren’t together like that just because we both.” Hongjoong dropped his voice. “Like men.”

“What?” Jongho blinked at him, completely unimpressed. “You get him flowers every week and he doesn’t know you like him?”

“Because I don’t,” Hongjoong lied through his teeth. “I bring you stuff too.”

“There was a giant Lego bag with the flowers this week,” Jongho said, squinting at him. “I think people would call what you’re doing courting.”

“Then do that with your guy,” Hongjoong groaned, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t know. How do you even know him?”

“The gym,” Jongho answered, taking a long sip of his drink. “That makes it harder, I think.”

“It could make it easier,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Maybe just out yourself and see what happens.”

“That’s terrible advice,” Seonghwa’s voice cut through the air.

Hongjoong startled so hard his shoulders jumped. He turned around, wide-eyed, to see Seonghwa standing behind him.

“I told him he should ask this guy to dinner,” Seonghwa said, stepping closer with an easy shrug. “And make it obvious that it’s more.”

“I can’t listen to you,” Jongho groaned, slumping in his seat. “Even straight men want to date you.”

Seonghwa’s mouth pressed into a tight line, and Hongjoong had to bite the inside of his cheek to stop himself from asking more. Had someone treated Seonghwa like an experiment? The thought made his chest ache.

“Just get a rainbow pin or patch and put it on your bag,” Hongjoong said, trying to redirect the conversation. “Quietly and safely queer. Just make sure he sees it.”

“I have a bi flag,” Jongho said, his smile soft and genuine.

“Now that you’ve settled that, can I have Hongjoong?” Seonghwa asked, his tone sharper than usual.

“He’s all yours,” Jongho replied, waving a dismissive hand.

Hongjoong was surprised when Seonghwa grabbed his hand. He went willingly when Seonghwa pulled him towards the hallway. Seonghwa dropped his hand before they passed the open section that was full of desks though. Hongjoong couldn’t help but pause to wave at his student’s mother. He noticed the way Seonghwa’s posture straightened as she waved back brightly. The jealousy was more endearing than anything, and Hongjoong found himself smiling at it.

There wasn’t any universe that existed where he’d have eyes for anyone but Seonghwa.

Once the office door was closed Seonghwa pulled out the chair for Hongjoong and went right for the drawer where he stored his pillow. Hongjoong set down the drink he had for Seonghwa and the bag with his treat onto his desk.

“I have a tight timeline today,” Seonghwa said evenly.

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded as he sat down.

Seonghwa dropped to his knees and looked up at Hongjoong expectantly. It was only then that Hongjoong noticed the deep purple marks under Seonghwa’s eyes. Even his make-up couldn’t hide them.

“Are you okay,” Hongjoong leaned forward and placed his hand on Seonghwa’s shoulder.

“It’s a busy week for me,” Seonghwa shut his eyes. “Also thank you, but you don’t need to keep getting me gifts. I can’t even believe you remembered the sets I wanted.”

Hongjoong let out a forced laugh as Seonghwa opened his eyes, “I like doing things like that for people, but I’ll stop if it makes you uncomfortable.”

“It’s not that,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I told you even my dates aren’t spoiling me like you are.”

“Then they’re bad dates,” Hongjoong said evenly.

“They have been,” Seonghwa admitted. “I like the flowers. This week they were extra beautiful everyone was jealous.”

Hongjoong let out a relieved sigh, “I helped pick them out this week. I added in the asters, they mean star.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa looked up at him with wide puppy eyes and Hongjoong brought his hand back to his own lap.

He wanted to kiss Seonghwa, so he did. Not in the way he wanted too though. No, Hongjoong simply leaned forward and placed a chaste kiss on Seonghwa’s forehead.

“So, I have no idea what I’m doing with the whole piss thing,” Hongjoong said when he sat back.

“That’s,” Seonghwa licked over his lips and blinked slowly. “It’s okay we don’t have to.”

“We can do it,” Hongjoong smiled. “I watched a porn once and the bottom pissed while he was getting fucked. I was into it, can we do that?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa answered quickly.

Hongjoong laughed, “okay so we do that then. Anything else?”

“Can you,” Seonghwa breathed out and stopped talking.

“Listen,” Hongjoong started. “I’m not going to judge you Seonghwa. It’s okay to want things that other people might not be into.”

“Thank you,” Seonghwa said quietly. “Can we do some bladder control throughout the day too?”

“Of course,” Hongjoong nodded. “We can text before I come over. Will that work?”

“That’s good,” Seonghwa nodded. “Can you check up on how much I’m drinking and stuff like that?”

“I can,” Hongjoong nodded. “You’ll need to waterproof whatever surface you want to get fucked on though.”

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa’s jaw dropped a little.

“That’s where you draw the line?” Hongjoong laughed. “I have to fuck you if you’re going to piss yourself while getting fucked. Or did you want me to use a toy on you?”

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I want you.”

Hongjoong’s heartrate picked up.

“If you’re bad this week, you’re getting a toy,” Hongjoong offered to distract from how his pulse quickened.

“I’ll be good,” Seonghwa nodded sharply. “I’ll need to relax by Friday.”

“Is work that bad?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Don’t worry about it,” Seonghwa waved his hand. “I have people to complain to about work already. You don’t need to be worried about it. You’ll relax me on Friday, and I’ll build one of the lego sets on Sunday and be good as new.”

Hongjoong wanted to be someone that Seonghwa felt like he could talk to, but there needed to be lines in their relationship. Apparently, this was one of them.

“And I’m sorry, but I need to end this now,” Seonghwa bowed his head. “I have a call that I couldn’t move.”

“Wait what?” Hongjoong shifted.

“Work,” Seonghwa waved his hand. “It’s a week of late nights.”

“Are you taking care of yourself,” Hongjoong leaned forward.

“Of course,” Seonghwa nodded.

“That is a lie,” Hongjoong pointed at him. “I can tell. What have you eaten today? Have you been drinking water?”

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa laughed lightly.

“That’s a no,” Hongjoong frowned. “I’m going to leave, but I’m going to have Jongho order you food and get you water. You need to be well fed and hydrated to perform at work and be able to play with me.”

“Yes Sir.” Seonghwa answered quietly.

“And sleep as much as you can. I understand late nights happen, but…” Hongjoong breathed out. “You are precious and deserve the most care.”

Seonghwa swallowed and leaned his head back with his eyes closed, “yes Sir.”

“Good bunny,” Hongjoong breathed out as he stood up. “You can get up.”

“I don’t want to,” Seonghwa let out a tight laugh and leaned forward to rest against Hongjoong’s leg. “I just want to drift away into subspace and forget that I have to be in charge and make decisions. So much is on my shoulders right now, our scenes take all that way.”

Hongjoong thought for a moment before he spoke, “when you look at your water and take a sip think of me, and being good for me. When you eat well later think about me.”

“Okay.” Seonghwa shifted backwards away from Hongjoong and pressed his eyes with the heels of his hands. “Okay. I can do this.”

“Delegate where you can, and you can reach out if you need me,” Hongjoong promised as Seonghwa finally stood.

“It feels stupid to be emotional about work,” Seonghwa laughed at himself, but his eyes were glassy as he stood up.

“It’s not,” Hongjoong reached out and grabbed Seonghwa’s hands to hold them. “Work is stressful. However you react to that is valid. If how you’re reacting really bothers you we can figure out ways to make things easier.”

“I’m glad I found you,” Seonghwa offered Hongjoong a smile. “You’re exactly what I need right now.”

Right now.

Hongjoong’s stomach dropped, but he didn’t let it show.

“I feel the same way,” Hongjoong nodded. “I’ll let you get back to work. Make sure you eat your pastry and drink your coffee. It’ll help. I’ll make sure you have dinner soon.”

“Okay,” Seonghwa smiled before he bent to pick up the pillow and put it away.

“I’ll see you soon,” Hongjoong offered him another smile before he slipped out of the door.

His phone was in his hand instantly as he walked down the hallway. He quickly ordered a sandwich with a salad and a small bag of chips to the office building. By the time he was back in the reception area the food was ordered.

“Can you get Seonghwa a few bottles of water?” Hongjoong asked Jongho. “And I ordered him dinner it’ll be here in about a half hour. Let me know if it doesn’t show up and I’ll order something else.”

Jongho looked at him.

“What?” Hongjoong groaned.

“You don’t like him?” Jongho stood up.

“Oh fuck off,” Hongjoong rolled his eyes. “I’ll see you next week. Don’t be a brat.”

“No can do,” Jongho waved at him with a bottle of water in his hand.

“At the very least make sure he always has some water,” Hongjoong let out a breath. “And don’t say anything shitty to me about it.”

“You really take the fun out of everything,” Jongho shrugged. “Give me your number. I’ll let you know when the food gets here.”

Hongjoong took the phone Jongho offered him and quickly typed in his name and number before he handed it back.

“Okay hold on,” Jongho took a blurry photo of Hongjoong frowning for his contact photo. “Good enough.”

“You are the worst kind of youth,” Hongjoong grumbled.

“I’m like three years younger than you,” Jongho laughed. “Maybe five. I don’t know.”

Hongjoong groaned. “I’m leaving. I’ll see you next week.”

“Bye bye,” Jongho sing songed as Hongjoong disappeared into the elevator.

Halfway home Hongjoong got a message from Jongho that the food for Seonghwa had arrived. Ten minutes after that he got sent a quick ten second video of Seonghwa smiling to himself as he diligently chewed on some lettuce from his salad. Always a bunny.

Hongjoong felt lighter as he got into his apartment, and a giddy feeling ran through him when he realized that Mingi and Yunho were out for dinner. He had alone time.

Once Hongjoong was in his room, he typed in the website Wooyoung had recommended and navigated to the piss play section as he laid on his back in his bed. He navigated though the website with one hand and rested the other on his stomach. This was just research, he didn’t need to get off.

The only thing he needed to do was get some ideas about what to do and how to lead the scene. It didn’t take long for him to find a video with two men he found attractive that had a description that matched what he was looking for.

“Sure,” Hongjoong mumbled to his empty room as he clicked the play button.

The video opened with the bottom shifting in his seat making eyes at the camera. It was obvious that he needed to go, but when another person came into the frame it was obvious that it wasn’t going to happen. The two men started kissing and the top started to get a little pushy and grabby with the bottom. The noises the bottom was making caused Hongjoong’s cock to twitch with interest before it started to fill.

Was Seonghwa going to whine like that?

The couple fell back onto the bed and Hongjoong watched, fully interested, as the top pressed low on the bottom’s stomach. The bottom whined and shook his head in protest. Hongjoong made a mental note of the action before he shifted to free his now hard cock. He had to set his phone down to push his sweatpants under his ass, and when he picked it back up the top had two fingers deep inside of the bottom. Right as Hongjoong’s hand touched his cock a small spurt of piss came out of the bottom as he cried out.

“Oh fuck,” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide.

In his mind he was only seeing Seonghwa.

Hongjoong breathed out roughly as he rubbed himself. His eyes drifted shut and he focused more on the fantasy in his head. There was no doubt that he could easily get off with Seonghwa under him pissing himself. Just the idea of being able to be inside of Seonghwa again was enough to have him on edge. Hongjoong had plenty of partners in his past, but he couldn’t remember anyone fitting around him so well. He grunted and increased the pressure of his hand.

Then, suddenly, an annoying ringtone cut through Hongjoong’s fantasy.

It was Seonghwa.

Hongjoong dropped his cock and scrambled for his phone. After the first time he had missed Seonghwa’s call he set an exception for his number to always go through do not disturb. He had also set up a very specific ringtone so that he always knew that it was Seonghwa calling. There was no way that the was going to miss another call from the man ever again.

Hongjoong fumbled for the phone and picked it up before he was fully ready.

“Is everything okay?” Hongjoong rushed to say.

There was a little laugh on the other end of the line.

“Are you working out?” Seonghwa asked quietly. “You sound out of breath.”

“I was doing research,” Hongjoong answered.

“Weird way to say masturbating but okay,” Seonghwa laughed again.

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong said with an edge to his tone. “Is something wrong?”

“I want to change the scene,” Seonghwa mumbled. “I realized today that I need something different.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong said slowly. He had just gotten into the idea of piss play he wasn’t ready to pivot, even though he’d do anything for Seonghwa.

“I want to do some heavy impact play,” Seonghwa said firmly. “The week is only going to get worse and worse for me so I really want to do something that will relax me, not just get me off.” Seonghwa paused. “If you wanted to we could do two scenes this week. That way your research doesn’t go to waste.”

“When would we have time for the second one?” Hongjoong asked.

“Sunday?” Seonghwa suggested. “Maybe start with some bladder control stuff before you get here. It could be fun.”

“I have Sunday free,” Hongjoong answered quickly. “But did you want to talk about the work stuff?”

“No.” Seonghwa answered firmly. “I just want it beat out of me, and you’re the one I trust to do that. I can complain to anyone; I can’t engage in that kind of impact play with anyone.”

Hongjoong made a face to himself. He wanted to be the person that Seonghwa talked to about his issues. It was clear that his place was only as Seonghwa’s Dom, but Hongjoong wanted more. Hongjoong wanted to take care of Seonghwa in any way that he could. He wanted to be able to listen to the other man’s issues and ease some of his mental troubles, before he took it further and involved a scene.

There was so much that Hongjoong didn’t know about Seonghwa. He still had no idea exactly what Seonghwa did at work, and he knew nothing about his friends beyond Wooyoung, San, and Jongho. There had to be other people in Seonghwa’s life. What were his parents like? Did he have siblings? Who did he normally talk to? Was Seonghwa lying? Did he even have anyone?

“I’m glad you can trust me,” Hongjoong settled on saying. “What kind of impact were you thinking of doing?”

“Caning if you’re comfortable with it, if not a spanking will work.” Seonghwa answered evenly.

Hongjoong didn’t like Seonghwa’s tone, and he didn’t like the idea of having to figure out how to do something else new. Caning wasn’t something he had ever thought that he’d have a chance to do. However, it was something that he had thought about deeply enough to have read about it and thought about it though.

“I can do that,” Hongjoong answered.

He didn’t even really have any time to get ready for the scene. A day might not be enough and he knew he’d need Wooyoung’s help. Seonghwa’s skin didn’t seem tough enough for a cane. Most of what Hongjoong knew was that he needed to be extra careful, canes could easily break the skin, never mind the bruising that could happen.

“Are you sure?” Seonghwa’s tone seemed to perk up.

“I’m sure,” Hongjoong said confidently even though he wasn’t sure. He also didn’t like the idea of Seonghwa coping with a harder than normal week with physical pain. Hongjoong understood the chemical release, and he knew it would help, but he didn’t like the idea that it was the only way Seonghwa was going to work through his issues.

“Thank you,” Seonghwa said softly.

“Just promise me you’ll talk to someone too,” Hongjoong requested. “I don’t like the idea of you dealing with your issues though pain.”

“I’ll talk to San,” Seonghwa admitted. “He’s a good listener.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded to himself. “I can check up and make sure that you spoke to him.”

Seonghwa laughed, “I know. Now, you can call Wooyoung and panic about the caning.”

“Hey,” Hongjoong laughed. “I’m not panicked.”

“But you’re going to call him,” Seonghwa started. “Which means he’ll know I’m stressed, and he’ll also make San reach out. So, I’ll be well taken care of.”

“You can talk to me,” Hongjoong offered. “Anytime. I don’t mind.”

“I ask a lot of you, Hongjoong,” Seonghwa sighed. “I can’t ask you to take on emotional stuff too.”

“You can,” Hongjoong pushed.

“I can, but I won’t,” Seonghwa replied, and it felt final.

“Okay.” Hongjoong exhaled softly. “I’ll respect the boundary. Please try to sleep well and relax tonight.”

“I’ll do my best,” Seonghwa said, his voice tight.

“Goodnight,” Hongjoong murmured.

“Goodnight, and thank you. I’ll see you Friday.”

The line went dead. Hongjoong stared at the black screen of his pohone for a long moment before tapping it again to call Wooyoung. The phone rang several times before a groggy voice answered.

“What’s up?” Wooyoung asked.

“Seonghwa wants to do a caning scene,” Hongjoong said flatly. “I’ve never done that.”

“I think San is on the phone with him now,” Wooyoung replied. “Sounds like a team messed up a project, and Seonghwa has to fix it, mostly by himself.”

Hongjoong’s stomach twisted. He hated that, but he didn’t know if he could say anything. Apparently, he wasn’t supposed to care about Seonghwa’s feelings outside of scenes. He wasn’t even sure if he should keep sending flowers and gifts anymore. He knew he’d crossed a few lines, but the thought of stopping made something inside him ache.

“You don’t have to tell me that,” he said quietly. “He didn’t want to, so you shouldn’t be telling me.”

“Seonghwa doesn’t always know what’s good for him,” Wooyoung said.

“That’s not what this call is about,” Hongjoong muttered. “Do you have experience with caning?”

“Of course I do.” Wooyoung’s tone softened. “I can help. It’s getting late though. Can we meet tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow’s good,” Hongjoong said. “You can come over here if you want.”

“After work,” Wooyoung agreed.

“I’ll text you the address.”

“Sounds good. See you tomorrow.”

Hongjoong sighed as he was hung up on for the second time that night. He wasn’t even horny anymore.

That night, he fell asleep worrying about Seonghwa.

**

Hongjoong, somehow, was running late. It wasn’t anything life-ending, but he didn’t want Wooyoung to get to his apartment before he got there. Mingi and Yunho were home, and that alone made him uneasy. He knew they’d all get along too well if given the chance. That was the problem.

If Wooyoung lingered, if one of them suggested hanging out again, his two separate worlds would start to overlap. And once that happened, his life would be twisted with Seonghwa’s forever.

The thought made him want to be sick. Hongjoong already knew he’d never survive seeing Seonghwa out in the world, smiling, holding hands with another man, with a family around them. He didn’t need to do anything to force himself into that scenario.

He just needed to get home first.

“Oh my god, why are you here?” Hongjoong blurted the moment he shut his apartment door.

“Yunho invited me to game.” Yeosang lifted the remote like proof and flopped onto an armchair.

“How did you get here quicker than me? We left at the same time.” Hongjoong toed his sneakers off and shook each foot dramatically until they fell off.

“Shortcut,” Yeosang said with a lazy shrug, already scrolling through the game menu.

“You know a shortcut to my apartment and never thought to tell me?” Hongjoong narrowed his eyes.

“We’ve told you three times,” Mingi muttered without looking up, sprawled across half the couch.

Hongjoong threw his arms in the air, and then gave up and just told them what was going on. “Wooyoung is coming over.”

“Oh?” Yunho perked up from the other end of the couch, controller dangling from his hand. “We finally get to meet one of your new friends.”

“I’d rather meet his boyfriend,” Mingi added with a laugh, tipping his head back against the cushions.

“Don’t say that!” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide. He pressed both palms to his face before he started to pace in front of the door. “Oh my god, don’t say that. Wooyoung will be here soon. That’s not even close to funny. He can’t hear you say something like that. Please be good.”

“Why are you more panicked than me?” Yeosang asked, making a face as he tucked one leg beneath him. “And I’m fine by the way. We’re all okay with each other.”

“I just didn’t think everyone would be here,” Hongjoong said, waving his hands helplessly.

“Wait. What did you do that he’s coming here?” Yeosang asked, tilting his head. “How did you mess up?”

Hongjoong let his arms drop, defeated. “Nothing.”

“Well, that’s a lie,” Yunho said, pushing himself up off the couch with a groan. He wandered toward the kitchen. “I don’t think we have enough food for him, but we can try and split it out.”

“What if he brings snacks?” Mingi grinned, leaning over the back of the couch to look toward the door.

“He might bring snacks,” Yeosang agreed, half smirking.

“I don’t need snacks,” Hongjoong muttered, tugging at the hem of his shirt.

“I do,” Mingi said cheerfully, stretching out like a cat. “So many snacks.”

Hongjoong opened his mouth to speak but the doorbell rang before he could get a word out. It was followed by a quiet knock. He opened the door with a grimace. The only person it could be was Wooyoung, and now he didn’t have any time to get mentally ready for the invasion. Hongjoong should have offered to meet anywhere else but his home.

When Hongjoong opened the door Wooyoung was standing there with two large reusable bags.

“These are from San,” Wooyoung held them up as he walked into the apartment. “And me, I mean I cooked it all he just packaged it up. Wait it’s clean in here.”

“Of course it’s clean,” Hongjoong grumbled.

“I don’t know, we all wondered what your house looked like,” Wooyoung laughed as he looked around the living room. “Oh, Yeosang, hi.”

“Hi,” Yeosang squeaked, nearly spilling the soda can he was balancing on his knee.

We all wondered? Hongjoong’s chest tightened. Did Seonghwa think he was messy too? They were just young guys, it didn’t mean they were messy.

“We can go in my room,” Hongjoong said quickly, already angling toward the hallway.

“I’m Wooyoung,” Wooyoung added, giving a cheerful wave to Mingi and Yunho like he had all the time in the world.

“Now. We can go now,” Hongjoong cut in, his voice pitchy with urgency.

“I’m Yunho,” Yunho said as he moved towards Wooyoung. “That’s Mingi. I’d say Hongjoong isn’t always this much of a mess, but I guess you’d know better than that by now.”

“He’s a cute mess,” Wooyoung replied easily, grin widening as he held out the two reusable bags to Yunho. “Here these are for you guys. Just make sure we get the bags and containers back.”

“Of course,” Yunho said, already reaching for them. He shot Hongjoong a teasing smile. “Thanks for getting us Sugar Daddies Hongjoongie.”

Yeosang snorted out a laugh and Hongjoong wanted to die. This visit was supposed to be about Seonghwa not about his roommates meeting Wooyoung. The married couple didn’t always have to provide them with food, they didn’t have to take care of anyone. Hongjoong wasn’t helpless and neither were Yunho and Mingi. He wondered if they provided for Yeosang like that now that they weren’t hooking up anymore.

“Oh! Youngie,” Wooyoung beamed. “Seoha keeps chanting your name. Just babbling Yeo, Yeo, Yeo. It’s really cute. We’ll just be sitting there and she’ll start. It’s like her new vocal stim.”

Yeosang gave him a soft smile, “that is cute.”

“It means you need to come back over soon,” Wooyoung grinned.

Hongjoong’s heart settled a little. At least that friendship was going well.

“We’re also great with kids,” Mingi cut in.

“No,” Hongjoong pointed.

“We could do a cookout,” Wooyoung clapped his hands. “We have enough room in the yard. Seonghwa and Jongho could come too.”'

Hongjoong’s heart stuttered to a stop as one of his worst fears manifested.

They were all fine having mini interventions with him to make sure he was protecting his heart, but when it came down to it did they really care? He knew Yunho and Mingi meant well, but now he’d have to slowly and painful explain that the idea of seeing Seonghwa with another man made him want to lay down in the dirt until the earth reclaimed his body.

“We can plan it out another time,” Wooyoung looked back at Hongjoong and smiled.

It seemed like the others got the hint.

“Yeah we can all hang out in like two months when the shit hits the fan and they figure it out,” Yunho shrugged and gestured to Hongjoong to indicate that he was talking about him and Seonghwa.

Hongjoong had never felt so violent. Normally he’d lunge for his friend and tackle the taller man to the ground, but he wanted to act like he had his life together in front of Wooyoung.

Wooyoung let out a loud and delighted laugh, “Hongjoong you have amazing friends.”

“They’re fine,” Hongjoong crossed his arms. “Can we please go talk now?”

“Sure,” Wooyoung waved to the living room. “Bye guys.”

“Listen,” Hongjoong sighed and opened his bedroom door. “I know I sound like a broken record, but all of this isn’t real. You could be gone in a few months, or at the very least done with me. I don’t want that to impact anyone else.”

“So, San and I aren’t going anywhere,” Wooyoung frowned and grabbed Hongjoong’s arm. “I sincerely don’t think Seonghwa will be going anywhere either. Even when if he finds someone else. We all really like you.”

“I don’t want to see him after he finds someone else,” Hongjoong said simply. “Anyway, I only kind of have an idea about how to cane someone. I know it can break the skin.”

Thankfully Wooyoung had enough common sense to go with the topic change. Hongjoong was thankful that despite his boisterous personality he was good at reading the room and dropping topics when Hongjoong needed him too.

“Oh, I have a guide to send you,” Wooyoung said as he pulled out his phone. “It’s really just green, yellow and red spots. Honestly just stick to his ass and thighs. Maybe a light tap to his upper arms or something to mix it up. Do you even have a cane?”

“Why would I have a cane?” Hongjoong groaned and flopped back onto his bed dramatically.

“You’re so dramatic, we can just order one,” Wooyoung laughed as he pulled out the chair by Hongjoong’s small desk and sat down. “I have a site that’s really good about overnight shipping just send it to his house. It’ll drive him crazy if you get other stuff too, he’s nosy.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong sat up. “That’s a good idea.”

“Hongjoong have you ever considered an anxiety med?” Wooyoung laughed.

“Fuck off,” Hongjoong threw a pillow at him.

Wooyoung caught the pillow easily and tossed it back onto the bed, “I refuse to believe you’re always this anxious if you teach kids.”

“I’m not,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’m confident at work. Seonghwa just throws me off until we’re in a scene and then I’m fine. I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing every time he suggests we do something.”

“You shouldn’t feel like that,” Wooyoung smiled. “You’re not going to mess up, and Seonghwa will tell you if you do. You can trust him.”

“I know,” Hongjoong answered tightly. “Send me the link to the website.”

“I sent you the link to the cane you should order,” Wooyoung added. “Get anything else you want.”

Hongjoong hummed in acknowledgement and picked up his phone. He added the cane to the cart without a second thought. A ball gag popped up as a suggested item and Hongjoong added that too. He’d thought about Seonghwa’s lips stretched around a gag several times, and maybe it was time to try that as well. He had always wanted to see Seonghwa messy.

Then a fluffy white plug got his attention. Hongjoong felt his heartrate pick up when he clicked on it. Not only was it a fluffy white plug, but there was a collar, cuffs and ears recommended right below it to complete the outfit. The cuffs and collar were thinly veiled bondage gear, and the ears were simple, long, and white. It looked like they had some kind of wire in them so they could be posed as well. With red cheeks he added everything to the cart and checked the total.

Hongjoong completed the purchase, and then quickly texted Seonghwa to expect a few packages and that he’d forward him the tracking once he had it. He looked at his phone expecting some kind of answer.

“He’s on a second date tonight,” Wooyoung cut through the silence.

“That’s fine,” Hongjoong set his phone down. “It sounded like he wasn’t looking forward to the first date with this guy so that’s good that they made it to a second one.”

“I’m going to say one thing, then I’m going to drop it for now and we’ll go back to the caning stuff,” Wooyoung shifted. “You don’t even need to say anything.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded as his stomach twisted nervously.

“You have two options to navigate what you have going on with Seonghwa. You can tell him that you have feelings for him, or you can figure out a way to accept that he’s going to be gone. You can’t sit and pine and frown while you pretend like you don’t care. That’s going to cause a messy blow up.”

“I’m doing the second option,” Hongjoong sighed.

“Then you need to do it better because it’s coming off as pining and frowning,” Wooyoung shook his head.

Hongjoong opened his mouth to speak, but Wooyoung cut him off.

“Anyway. You’ll need to watch his skin closely. I’m not sure he’s ever done this before, but that doesn’t matter, either way his body is out of practice so it’s not going to take much to really mark him up. Expect bruising too.”

“It’s going to look so pretty,” Hongjoong sighed and Wooyoung laughed at him.

“You can tap his back too, but I’m sure he’s going to want days where it hurts to sit,” Wooyoung shrugged.

“That was the plan,” Hongjoong nodded. “I’m still not thrilled with him wanting pain over talking but I can work with it.”

“He talked to San,” Wooyoung pointed out. “They have a very close relationship. Seonghwa has been one of the only men I’ve ever been jealous of when it comes to San. They default to each other. I’d say they’re like brothers but it would be weird with some of the positions I’ve seen them in.”

“That’s,” Hongjoong took a breath. “Okay good. I’m glad he has someone.”

“Seonghwa keeps his circle small, he doesn’t have many people that he’s close to, his ex-husband made sure of that so we try to be there for him as much as possible but sometimes it’s hard with the girls.” Wooyoung continued.

Hongjoong nodded. He didn’t know what to say or what he could add that would help.

“Oh, get some bruise gel tomorrow,” Wooyoung shrugged. “You can put it on after the scene and on Sunday after that one too.”

Hongjoong nodded.

“Then leave it with him and tell him that he has to use it,” Wooyoung stated. “It’s going to take a while for the marks to heal.”

“Do you think,” Hongjoong let out a breath. “That he’s going to cancel the scene if he likes this guy because of the marks?”

Wooyoung rolled his eyes, “no. The scenes are his priority. I’m sure if he likes someone enough, he’ll bring up kink on the off chance the guy is into it. It’ll explain the marks.”

Right, the scenes were Seonghwa’s priority, not Hongjoong.

“Makes sense,” Hongjoong gritted out.

Wooyoung laughed, “yeah you’re really giving off, will move on quickly vibes.” Wooyoung paused and took a breath. “Can I talk about Yeosang?”

Hongjoong nodded. He wasn’t sure, but he could stop the conversation if he wasn’t comfortable with where it was going.

“I don’t know if you know, but he was having a hard time when we were done,” Wooyoung started. “The only reason we’re already at a place where he can be at the house with our daughters is because the three of us talked about our feelings. It was a hard conversation, but it got us to a good place.” Wooyoung reached out to touch Hongjoong’s leg. “It’s okay to have to pause and emotionally check in with Seonghwa.”

“The guy at the gym helped Yeosang a lot too,” Hongjoong said just to be petty.

“Do you know if anything happened there yet?” Wooyoung leaned in. “I’m so ready for that to be a thing. Yeosang deserves someone who’s obsessed with him.”

“Literally everyone is obsessed with him,” Hongjoong deadpanned.

“Aren’t you just a ray of sunshine tonight,” Wooyoung laughed brightly. “Sorry I mentioned the second date.”

“It’s fine,” Hongjoong waved his hand. “It’s reality, and I have no idea what’s going on with Yeosang and that guy.”

“I’ll get San to find out,” Wooyoung shifted in the chair. “They text all day every day. It’s exhausting.”

“How are you not jealous?” Hongjoong asked seriously. He still remembered Yeosang making a comment about being inside of Wooyoung’s husband.

“Like I said, we talk, all three of us if we need to,” Wooyoung shrugged. “It’s not that deep. If you want to know what someone is thinking you just ask.”

Sometimes it was more complicated than that. Sometimes Hongjoong was so scared of the answer that he couldn’t bear to even think about asking.

“Or you can overthink and drive yourself crazy,” Wooyoung shook his head with a smile. “Either way I trust San and Yeosang. Nothing is going on there, and we have a group chat so I see everything even if I don’t want to.”

Hongjoong nodded, and then yawned.

“Study the chart,” Wooyoung stood. “Go slowly even if he’s begging for more. Remember you’re in charge not him.”

“I’m going to give Seonghwa what he wants,” Hongjoong said firmly.

“And part of that is knowing what his limits are, because he might not be in the right headspace to,” Wooyoung countered. “You keep him safe as much as you fulfil his desires.”

Hongjoong deflated a little bit, “you’re right.”

“Okay I need to get home for bedtime,” Wooyoung looked at the time on his phone. “Are you feeling better?”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong nodded and they left the bedroom. “You can stay if you want.”

“No,” Wooyoung shook his head as he went for his shoes. “Bedtime remember?”

“Right,” Hongjoong nodded.

He wasn’t completely sure if Wooyoung was being respectful of his boundaries or if bedtime was really that important. Either way Hongjoong stood back while Wooyoung said goodbye to the other three men. He bit his tongue when they all exchanged social media accounts. He hadn’t even followed Wooyoung or San yet.

“Your husband's hot,” Yunho commented.

“I know,” Wooyoung looked at him like he was stupid.

“No like really hot,” Yunho scrolled his phone more. “Hongjoong are all of these guys just disgustingly attractive?”

“Yes,” Yeosang answered for Hongjoong.

“Let him leave,” Hongjoong added in which only made Wooyoung laugh.

“You can DM me,” Wooyoung gave a peace sign and slipped his shoes on before he left the apartment without a goodbye to Hongjoong. It was likely some kind of punishment for how pissy Hongjoong had been most of the night.

“Can we really not all hang out?” Mingi pouted. “They seem fun. Yeosang said they’re fun and the girls are cute.”

“They are cute,” Hongjoong sighed. “Give it a few more weeks and we’ll see. Right now, it makes me uncomfortable.”

Mingi let out his own sigh as he shifted on the couch, “fine.”

“Wanna game” Yunho held up his controller as an offer.

“No, but I’ll sit with you guys.”

The three men in the living room cheered as Hongjoong plopped onto the couch.

Seonghwa still hadn’t answered his text message.

**

There was a beat of silence after Hongjoong knocked on Seonghwa’s door, it was just long enough for him to panic. His chest tightened and his brain flashed with a ridiculous image. Hongjoong imagined some tall, faceless man opening the door, and laughing at him for showing up.

It was stupid. He knew it was stupid. Two dates weren’t enough for Seonghwa to have someone else waiting to replace him. Hongjoong was perfectly aware of that, but the thought still clawed at the back of his head, prickling the edges of his nerves.

The feeling didn’t ease when the lock clicked and the door finally opened.

Seonghwa stood there in a long, fluffy robe, soft slippers peeking out beneath the hem, and his hair pushed back like he’d been lounging instead of getting ready. Hongjoong’s heart stumbled over itself. Somehow, this was worse.

“You can come in,” Seonghwa said in a soft tone.

“Sorry I wasn’t ready,” Hongjoong stumbled to say as he walked in.

Seonghwa’s mood was somber, and Hongjoong wanted to ask how he even found the time to go on a second date if his week had been that stressful. Was this guy that special that Seonghwa dug out time for him?

“I got two boxes,” Seonghwa gestured to where they were next to the door. “I think that was all.”

“It was,” Hongjoong nodded.

Why did everything feel wrong?

“Are you okay?” Hongjoong asked quietly. “We don’t have to do the scene if you want to just wait for the simpler one on Sunday.”

“I want it,” Seonghwa said firmly. “Everything was bad this week, and I just want to be here with you and not think.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded. “Then why are my shoes still on?”

Seonghwa’s face softened and a little bit of the sadness spilled off his features. He pulled off Hongjoong’s first shoe and started to work on the second one.

“Do you want me to show you what I got?” Hongjoong asked.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa breathed out as he took off Hongjoong’s second shoe.

“Go get me something I can cut the tape with,” Hongjoong gave Seonghwa’s head a small pat.

Seonghwa stood and walked off without a word and Hongjoong looked at the skinny long box. It was obvious what was in that, but it was really the contents in the smaller box that he wanted to show off. The bunny outfit had weighed on his mind throughout the day.

It was a silly thing to get based off of a nickname, but Hongjoong wanted to see those ears nestled in Seonghwa’s platinum hair, he wanted to see the fluffy white of the tail peeking from between his cheeks. Maybe he could get a maid apron and have Seonghwa do dishes dressed like that.

Hongjoong’s cock twitched, and he looked down at his crotch annoyed.

“Sir,” Seonghwa handed over a small box cutter. “Here.”

“Let’s open the obvious one,” Hongjoong cut the tape on the box and wasted no time pulling the cane out. “Open your mouth.”

Seonghwa’s jaw dropped and Hongjoong placed the cane between his teeth. Without being asked Seonghwa bit down.

“Rattan, just thin enough to sting some but thick enough to make an impact,” Hongjoong explained.

Hongjoong had spent half the night reading up on the model Wooyoung recommended, scrolling through reviews until his eyes blurred. The specs were solid. The material and width created the perfect balance of sturdiness and weight which was exactly what Hongjoong had hoped for. It felt like the perfect mix, and he’d already texted Wooyoung a thank you.

But even with the reassurance of research, there was still the issue that the rattan could snap. The cane wasn’t unbreakable; every article made that clear. If he went too hard or hit down at a bad angle, the whole thing could snap. He’d have to be careful because breaking the cane over Seonghwa’s body could cause physical and maybe emotional damage.

“Knees,” Hongjoong pointed to the ground and Seonghwa dropped with the cane still in his mouth.

Hongjoong opened the second box and took out the ball gag first. Without thinking, or asking he walked into the kitchen and used the sample cleaner to wipe down the black ball that sat at the middle. When he came back into the living room Seonghwa was there looking at him expectantly.

“If it’s okay with you I’d like to use this tonight,” Hongjoong held it up.

Seonghwa gave a sharp nod.

“The rest is maybe for later,” Hongjoong fished out the tail plug and held it up.

Seonghwa’s eyes lit up with recognition of what Hongjoong was holding. Hongjoong felt a little more confident as he held up the ears and Seonghwa’s pleased expression didn’t go anywhere.

“There’s a collar and cuffs too,” Hongjoong elaborated. “You can tuck these away for another time. Maybe I’ll get you an apron too.”

Seonghwa nodded.

“Put the cane on the table and take your robe and slippers off,” Hongjoong swallowed as Seonghwa moved without a word.

The silence was unusual. It made Hongjoong worry more, but he knew better than to ask if Seonghwa was okay again. Pressing too hard might make him retreat even further, or end the scene before it even started.

He was so lost in his thoughts that he almost missed Seonghwa taking his robe off. It dropped to the floor dramatically leaving the man dressed only in a pair of cute light pink, satin panties. There was no sign of a bulge and Hongjoong was at a complete loss. Seonghwa was always hard by now for their other scenes.

Hongjoong stepped into the room, careful, watching as Seonghwa quietly folded the robe before it set it and the slippers off to the side.

“Do you think you were good enough to deserve the caning?” Hongjoong asked, his voice low but steady.

The reaction was immediate. Seonghwa’s eyes glossed over, and then the tears spilled, silent and sudden.

Hongjoong’s chest seized. What was happening?

He needed to make the choice to move forward or stop things now.

“Sweet boy what’s your color?” Hongjoong dared to ask.

“Green,” Seonghwa whined as his tears continued to spill.

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded to himself.

He was going to move forward, but carefully and slowly.

“Please Sir,” Seonghwa said softly. “I need it.”

“What do you need?” Hongjoong asked even though he knew.

“The cane,” Seonghwa wiped at his cheeks. “Please Sir.”

“I know,” Hongjoong stepped towards him. “Don’t worry I know, and you were good this week weren’t you?”

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “I got through every day.”

“You worked late and got everything done?” Hongjoong asked, careful to avoid the topic of the date.

“I was so good,” Seonghwa sniffled. “I fixed everything.”

“And now you need me to help?” Hongjoong stepped closer again.

Seonghwa was beautiful like this. The tears clung to his lashes briefly before they spilled over and slid down his flushed cheeks. Seonghwa’s quiet sobs between his begging words had caused his lips to swell and part, staying open. Hongjoong was tempted to press his cock between them, but he wanted to make the night about Seonghwa and giving him everything that he needed.

It was devastating how pretty Seonghwa was like this. His eyes were glistening, mouth trembling and his breath caught on every word that he hiccupped out. Even the way Seonghwa’s chest rose and fell was attractive. He looked frail and it made Hongjoong hungry for the other man. It wasn’t fair that Seonghwa was always so perfect.

“Yes,” Seonghwa cried. “Please Sir.”

“I’m always here to give you what you need pretty bunny,” Hongjoong cooed. “We both know you deserve everything you want, all of the time, not just tonight.”

Seonghwa wailed at that, the sound tore from his throat like he had been waiting to let it loose. Hongjoong’s chest squeezed tight in response. It was okay though. This was just Seonghwa getting everything out in the safety that Hongjoong could offer him. Seonghwa needed this space to unravel after his week.

It was beautiful. Submission in its purest form, open and full of trust. Hongjoong hadn’t ever anticipated that they would find the time, or the trust to get this far in their scenes. He knew that Seonghwa’s trust was a gift, completely priceless and fragile. Hongjoong had to be so very careful with it.

“I’m going to use the gag now, okay?” Hongjoong asked gently. “Tell me right away if it’s too much.”

“I want it,” Seonghwa breathed out his voice shaking.

“I didn’t ask if you wanted it,” Hongjoong corrected softly with a frown pulling at his mouth. “I asked you to tell me if it’s too much.”

“I will Sir,” Seonghwa sniffed.

“That’s better,” Hongjoong walked around to Seonghwa’s back. “Open wide.”

Hongjoong used his fingers to guide the plastic ball between Seonghwa’s lips before he pulled the strap around his head. The buckle was easy enough to fasten, and Hongjoong knew he could get it off quickly if he needed to.

“Good?” Hongjoong asked when he was done.

Seonghwa’s red eyes were still wet, and his nose was now a cute shade of pink. Seonghwa managed a misty-eyed little thumbs up to indicate he was okay.

“Knees,” Hongjoong pointed to the floor.

Seonghwa dropped like a rock, but with the same level of grace that he always had.

Hongjoong let his eyes roam over Seonghwa. He was unwilling to rush the moment. Seonghwa was on his knees, his body trembling, and his face streaked with tears that only seemed to make him that much lovelier. His eyes were wet, and red rimmed, his lashes clumped together from crying, and his nose now red from sniffling.

Seonghwa’s plush mouth was stretched wide around the gag, lips slick and swollen, with drool already spilling down his chin. The mess of his drool clung to Seonghwa shamelessly, but somehow, he still looked like something precious and untouchable.

Hongjoong was in love.

Seonghwa’s cock was finally straining against the satin of his panties. The thin fabric did nothing to hide the way his arousal pressed forward. There was a dark pink spot at the tip where he had been leaking. When had Seonghwa even gotten hard? It made Hongjoong’s brain swirl with something so tender. Seonghwa was completely undone and vulnerable but so achingly gorgeous.

Hongjoong was in love and he couldn’t breathe.

He reached out deliberate, and slow, and let his fingertips trail over the gag and the curve of Seonghwa’s lips. The plastic was firm beneath his hand, but the lips stretched around it were soft, pliant and trembling with the need to close. Hongjoong traced the slickness of drool along Seonghwa’s jaw to his chest, then gently wiped the tears from his cheeks with his thumbs.

Seonghwa leaned into the touch, and Hongjoong wanted to cry. His whole body ached. Hongjoong couldn’t hold back he bent down and placed a soft kiss to Seonghwa’s warm forehead.

A fresh wave of sobs fell out of Seonghwa, his whole chest heaving as the tears spilled faster. His sobs were soft and sweet muffled by the gag, and Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile softly. There was Seonghwa on his knees, tears streaking down his face, droll dropping to his chest, cock hard and straining against his panties, but he was still offering every single piece of himself to Hongjoong.

And Hongjoong looked back at him, eyes full of love and respect. Right now, Seonghwa was more than beautiful. He was just raw and unguarded trust.

Hongjoong was never going to come back from his.

“Okay sweet bunny,” Hongjoong cooed. “Come on.”

Hongjoong helped Seonghwa push forward until he was on his hands and his knees. His head was held up proudly despite the tears that were somehow still falling. Hongjoong scrambled for the towel that Seonghwa had set out and placed it so that it was under Seonghwa’s mouth and cock. He didn’t want Seonghwa to have to get any kind of stains out of his soft plush carpet after the scene or the next morning.

Seonghwa made a helpless nnnhh mmmphhh noise a few times that quickly turned sour. Hongjoong knew what he wanted though, and he was more than ready to give it to Seonghwa.

“Show me how you safe word,” Hongjoong demanded as he turned around with the cane in his hand.

Seonghwa’s eyes went wide and panicked. It was all Hongjoong could do not to laugh.

Hongjoong shook his head firmly three times while making a nnnhhh noise each time.

Seonghwa mimicked the action and then looked at Hongjoong expectantly.

“You can go down and roll over onto your side as well,” Hongjoong added. “I’ll stop right away.”

Seonghwa blinked at him, his eyebrows knitting down into a frown.

There his brat was.

Hongjoong knew that he couldn’t hold off any longer. It was time to expand his practical knowledge and give Seonghwa something that he had been craving. With a deep breath Hongjoong walked around to Seonghwa’s backside and brought the cane down on his ass. He did it twice more before he bent down and pulled Seonghwa’s panties down and then off of his legs.

The first few hits were soft as Hongjoong tested the cane out. He didn’t want to break the cane or Seonghwa’s skin, and he knew that he should have practiced by hitting the couch before he had taken the cane to Seonghwa’s body. It was okay though, like everything else he’d figure it out. If anything, Seonghwa would think that he was just teasing or drawing the impact play out.

That wasn’t what he was doing though. Hongjoong knew he needed to find the right balance between Seonghwa and the rattan so neither broke. He wanted to leave marks, and Seonghwa’s ass was already turning a delicious shade of red, but Hongjoong wanted to leave bruises if possible. He didn’t want to break the skin though. The issue was that he didn’t know if he had enough skill to do that.

Seonghwa was patient with him, his hips danced with every single swat from the cane no matter how hard or soft it was. Then, once he had finally gotten into a good rhythm, Hongjoong’s heart froze when Seonghwa’s arms gave way and his shoulders collapsed down onto the floor.

He watched for a moment to see if the submissive was going to roll onto his side, but he didn’t. After another pregnant pause Seonghwa pushed back up onto his hands and looked sideways trying to find Hongjoong.

Hongjoong walked around Seonghwa’s body that was still shaking with uneven sobs.

How was he still crying?

Seonghwa’s blonde hair had fallen into his face, and stuck to his tear-stained cheeks. It framed his tear swollen eyes and contrasted beautifully with how red his face had gotten. Hongjoong watched him unsure if the tears were still an emotional release or if they were from the stinging pain he knew Seonghwa was still feeling even if he wasn’t actively being hit anymore.

The soft, broken sounds Seonghwa made were muffled yet sharp enough to make Hongjoong move closer. He reached out, only hesitating for a heartbeat before he let his fingers brush over the damp strands of hair falling into Seonghwa’s face, careful not to startle him.

Seonghwa’s eyes locked onto him, and Hongjoong pushed his hair out of his face.

“I’m going to keep going now,” Hongjoong moved back as he spoke.

Seonghwa gave him a firm nod and spread his legs a little more.

“I want to see these marks on you next week,” Hongjoong breathed out.

He was so hard, and it was getting more and more difficult to not think with his cock. He could do anything to Seonghwa right now and he knew that the submissive would just take it. That meant he had to be careful and blend both of their pleasures together. It wasn’t going to be completely seamless, but it was so obvious that anything that happened that evening wasn’t for him.

Hongjoong only worked over Seonghwa’s ass and the back of his thighs for a few more minutes until he paused again. The lines were turning a dark angry red in some spots and Hongjoong guessed that those were the areas that would bruise.

It was time to stop.

He dropped the cane, the dull thud of it on the carpet still managed to echo through the room. Seonghwa’s head snapped up and Hongjoong made quick work of the buckle on the gag. It dropped to the floor with the same kind of soft thud that the cane had.

Seonghwa licked his lips and flexed his jaw.

“Fuck my face,” Seonghwa demanded.

“Bunny,” Hongjoong breathed out as he crouched down to be more on Seonghwa’s level.

“Please Sir,” Seonghwa cried.

How did he still have tears? It was well over an hour from when he had first started to cry.

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea right now,” Hongjoong softly replied.

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “I want it please Sir, please.” He begged.

Hongjoong looked away. He needed to decide if this was a sane request. There was also the chance that Seonghwa would break if he said no even if it wasn’t completely sane. It was obvious that Seonghwa wasn’t completely there in that moment, and that was fine. They should have negotiated the scene more. Now Hongjoong had to make a hard choice, and he decided to finally think with his cock.

“Okay bunny,” Hongjoong gave in.

“Go hard,” Seonghwa panted.

Hongjoong slapped his cheek softly, “I’ll go as hard as I want.”

“Sorry Sir,” Seonghwa recoiled in on himself and Hongjoong realized that he needed to be softer in that moment.

“It’s okay pretty bunny,” Hongjoong cooed. “Don’t worry I’ll fill your mouth with cock just like you want me to.”

Seonghwa let out a happy noise and opened his mouth widely. The sight was messy. Seonghwa was wet with drool and streaked with tears. Hongjoong had no idea how he was eventually going to clean him up.

There was also no way that Hongjoong was going to last. He had been on edge since the first moment that he brought the cane down on Seonghwa’s ass. How messy he was didn’t help either. Hongjoong never knew he had a thing for messy, crying boys, but here he was with a hardon that could cut glass.

“You’re going to do all the work not me,” Hongjoong stated. “And you’re going to make me cum as quickly as you can, and you’re going to eat it all up. Do you understand.”

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa answered with a sharp nod before he opened his mouth again.

Hongjoong squeezed the outline of his cock through his jeans a few times. It was sneaky of him to tell Seonghwa to make him cum quickly, but it was the only way he could hide how eager he really was. He wasn’t even going to hold back. Hongjoong just knew that he had to fill Seonghwa’s throat for at least a few minutes before he finally gave in.

His cock bounced forward once it was freed before it slapped up against his lower stomach. Hongjoong wasn’t sure if he had ever been this hard before. Seonghwa looked as wrecked as Hongjoong felt.

There was no coming back from it when he pushed the head of his cock into the wet heat of Seonghwa’s mouth. The submissive took him down until his nose was buried in the coarse hair at the base of Hongjoong’s cock. Hongjoong couldn’t help but reach down and brush Seonghwa’s wet bangs out of his eyes.

Hongjoong wanted to explode, but he couldn’t. Seonghwa seemed content to sit there with Hongjoong’s cock filling his mouth and stretching his throat. Between the crying and the blow job he wasn’t going to have much of a voice the next day. Then Seonghwa started to move. He swallowed around Hongjoong’s cock twice before he started to move his head, sucking as he shifted his neck back and forth.

It wasn’t quick like Hongjoong ordered but it was so good that he couldn’t reprimand Seonghwa. He didn’t want to be harsh with him anyway. Everything the submissive did in that moment was perfect.

Until Seonghwa moved his tongue around the head of Hongjoong’s cock and Hongjoong came without warning. Hongjoong hadn’t realized just how on edge he was until Seonghwa’s firm tongue slid down the underside of his cock and then back up to the head. He’d be embarrassed, but Seonghwa had done exactly what he asked for. Hongjoong just wished he could have given him a little warning.

Seonghwa’s eyes were wide, but he swallowed everything before he pulled off and opened his mouth wide to show that he had in fact swallowed everything.

“Good boy Seonghwa,” Hongjoong cooed. “So good.”

Before they had started the caning Hongjoong had already decided that Seonghwa couldn’t mentally or physically handle an orgasm. Maybe once he had calmed down and gotten cleaned up, but there was no way Hongjoong was going to push him over the edge right now.

“Come on, let’s get you in bed so I can keep taking care of you,” Hongjoong tucked his cock away before he tapped Seonghwa’s shoulder. “Up.”

He had to help Seonghwa stand, and Hongjoong looped his arm around the other man’s waist as they walked to the bedroom.

“Where do you have an extra blanket that I can put down?” Hongjoong asked.

Seonghwa moved on shaky legs to get it himself. Hongjoong frowned, but it still felt like they were in scene even if he had ended it in his own head. He watched as Seonghwa laid the blanket down before he moved to help Seonghwa get into the plush bed.

“You are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” Hongjoong said even though he knew it gave too much of himself away. “You did so well.”

Seonghwa just looked up at him with big eyes and a parted mouth.

“I’m going to get some things to clean you up with and take care of your marks,” Hongjoong mentioned. “I will be right back.”

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa mumbled before he shut his eyes and wiggled down into his blankets.

Hongjoong smiled down at him before he rushed to his bag that had been left by the door. He fished out some ointment that he had picked up on his way to Seonghwa’s apartment before he made his way to the bathroom. He put the sink water as hot as it would go and held one of Seonghwa’s soft face cloths run under it. Once it was soaked, he wrung out the extra water and headed back to the bedroom.

“I’m going to clean you up,” Hongjoong said as he kneeled on the bed.

It was easy enough to wipe the mess from Seonghwa’s face and chest. Hongjoong was gentle in his motions, and he hoped that Seonghwa had some kind of magical face mask that could take away some of the redness and swelling in his cheeks for the next day.

“There, all clean,” Hongjoong hummed cheerfully.

Seonghwa’s eyes fluttered open and he looked up at Hongjoong. His face was still flushed from crying even now that it was completely wiped down, but it was the look in his eyes that caught Hongjoong’s attention. It wasn’t a look of submission or desire, it was something that Hongjoong had never seen before that he couldn’t really place.

Part of him knew though, and he quickly dismissed the idea as wishful thinking. Just because he had realized the true depths of his feelings didn’t mean Seonghwa had. The submissive was still coming down from a biological response to the caning. Nothing he did or said in that moment counted as something real.

“You were perfect too,” Seonghwa said quietly as he shut his eyes.

“Flip over,” Hongjoong tapped his hip. “I need to see the damage.”

It took a moment, but Seonghwa rolled his body over and Hongjoong let out a gasp. It wasn’t the worst he’d ever seen, but so many of the red lines from the cane had already started to bruise around the edges. Seonghwa’s body had taken the abuse worse than he expected it would, but it wasn’t anything too bad. The purple was beautiful on him anyway.

Hongjoong squirted the ointment into his hands before he started to rub it into Seonghwa’s ass and then down into his thighs.

He got carried away.

It wasn’t long before Seonghwa was a squirming and moaning mess under him. The massage and the pain from it must have gone right to his cock. Hongjoong didn’t even know if he had ever lost his erection, but he did know that Seonghwa wasn’t crying anymore.

“Flip back over,” Hongjoong requested.

Seonghwa moved so quickly that he bounced when he turned over which made Hongjoong let out a small laugh.

Without a word Hongjoong wrapped his hand around Seonghwa’s cock. He watched as the other man melted into the bed under him as Hongjoong stroked him. Seonghwa looked so relaxed as his hips swayed from the pleasure that Hongjoong was giving him. It wasn’t his best hand job, but Hongjoong just wanted to pull an orgasm out of Seonghwa to calm him back down.

“Close,” Seonghwa mumbled. “Please just let me.”

“I will good boy,” Hongjoong whispered out. “You can cum for me.”

Thankfully Hongjoong had the face cloth ready, and he caught most of Seonghwa’s cum with it before he used it to clean up what little did get on Seonghwa’s abdomen off.

What was he supposed to do now? Leave?

“Bed,” Seonghwa patted the space next to him.

“Hold on,” Hongjoong needed a second to slow his heart down. It had started to race from the request alone. “Where do you keep sweatpants and that kind of stuff.”

“Drawers,” Seonghwa gestured to the chest of drawers that the animal crossing legos were on.

Hongjoong got up and opened a few lower drawers before he found what he was looking for. He pulled out a plain grey pair of sweatpants, and a black hoodie.

“You can change too,” Seonghwa mumbled out. “In my stuff.”

Hongjoong’s chest felt tight. This man was going to end him. What did Seonghwa mean in his stuff? Hongjoong had actually brought a change of clothes this time.

“Just the hoodies you’re too small for the pants,” Seonghwa looked up at him.

“Rude,” Hongjoong looked back and frowned. “I guess the scene is over if you’re being a brat.”

“I think so,” Seonghwa nodded.

“I want the sweet crying boy back,” Hongjoong pouted as he stood up. He tossed the clothes over to Seonghwa before he pulled a deep blue hoodie on over his own head. It smelled like Seonghwa.

“I’m cried out,” Seonghwa sighed as he started to move to pull the clothing on. “Oh, this was a good idea.”

“I know,” Hongjoong shook his head and stood by the edge of the bed in case Seonghwa had changed his mind about Hongjoong getting in.

“Please come cuddle me,” Seonghwa pouted once he was dressed. “I need it.”

“Oh, right, yeah,” Hongjoong climbed into the bed.

He was stiff at first, but he managed to pull Seonghwa’s body against his. Somehow Seonghwa managed to make himself small enough to curl his body into Hongjoong’s and rest his head on the crease of Hongjoong’s armpit.

It was too domestic and Hongjoong’s heart already wasn’t going to make it through that night and now he’d have this memory haunting him as well.

“Thank you again,” Seonghwa mumbled. “I know you aren’t super into the pain to deal with stress thing, but it helped.”

“You freaked me out at first,” Hongjoong replied honestly. “I thought about stopping before we even started.”

“Sorry,” Seonghwa shifted further into Hongjoong’s body. “It just happened. I felt safe and good, and yeah.”

“Don’t apologize I figured it out,” Hongjoong stiffly put his hand on Seonghwa’s back to help comfort him.

“You always do,” Seonghwa nodded into his chest.

They were quiet for a while and Hongjoong started to wonder if Seonghwa had fallen asleep. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to deal with something like that. He didn’t feel like he could just leave, but it would be inappropriate to fall asleep himself. They weren’t like that, well, Seonghwa wasn’t.

“When I was married,” Seonghwa started in a sleepy voice. “I couldn’t have done that. Not just the impact play part, but let go like that and cry. I didn’t feel comfortable enough to, ever. One time early on I cried because I was upset about something he thought didn’t matter, and he was so dismissive. I should have taken that as a sign to leave, but I didn’t. I thought I was going to have this whole future with a guy I couldn’t even completely let go with which was so stupid.” Seonghwa took a deep breath. “Then you, this guy who’s still closer to a stranger than anything else, shows up and I’m sobbing on my hands and knees. It’s so weird.”

“Weird,” Hongjoong echoed. “I’m glad you feel safe with me though.”

“Me too,” Seonghwa hummed before he sat up. “I’m falling asleep.”

“I thought you already had,” Hongjoong let out an awkward laugh.

“I bet you were freaking out about staying or leaving,” Seonghwa laughed back and poked his cheek.

Hongjoong faked a gasp, “I was not.”

“That’s exactly what you were doing. I know you too well Kim Hongjoong,” Seonghwa smiled proud of himself. “You’re always panicked about something.”

“Fine,” Hongjoong sat up. “You can stay in bed. I can see myself out this time. Just be cozy in bed.”

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa nodded.

“And maybe use a facemask to help with being red and puffy?” Hongjoong slid off the bed.

“I will in the morning,” Seonghwa nodded.

“I’ll text you Sunday morning to make sure you stay hydrated,” Hongjoong promised.

“I’ll miss you till then,” Seonghwa said before he flopped back into his bed. “Good night Hongjoong.”

Hongjoong stood silently by his door trying to figure out if Seonghwa really meant the first part of what he said.

“Say it back!” Seonghwa demanded.

“Good night Seonghwa,” Hongjoong parroted back with a smile on his face.

After he picked up his bag Hongjoong slid his shoes on and headed out the door to go home.

He couldn’t believe that he was in love.

Hongjoong was deeply and irreversibly in love with Seonghwa and it was only going to hurt him.

**

Hongjoong got through most of Saturday ignoring his emotional development the same way he might ignore a bruise. It was there, vivid and obvious, but he could pretend it didn’t exist so long as he didn’t press on it. The trouble was that Hongjoong had always been the type to press on his bruises. He liked to wallow in disappointment, to test the ache again and again. If it hurt now, he reasoned, maybe it would hurt less later.

The idea of naming his feelings for Seonghwa felt like stepping off a ledge and free falling until he hit the ground. There was no mystery, Hongjoong could see the crash waiting, and he couldn’t avoid it.

Love had always been inevitable. Hongjoong knew himself well enough to understand that he’d been completely and utterly fucked the first time Seonghwa smiled at him. He was incapable of doing anything halfway. All he had ever hoped for was that they’d be closer to the end before he realized he had fallen, fully and completely, in love.

It was fine. He’d deal with it.

Late Saturday, by the time Hongjoong had finally manage to shut off his brain, his phone lit up with a call from Wooyoung.

“What’s up?” Hongjoong asked, exhausted.

“Why do you sound like he looks?” Wooyoung shot back immediately.

Hongjoong stretched out, forcing a yawn. “Just tired.”

“Right,” Wooyoung said slowly, not buying it. “Anyway, what did you do to him?”

Rolling onto his back, Hongjoong frowned at the ceiling. “What do you mean?”

“Seonghwa looked like shit when he came over today,” Wooyoung said, words tumbling fast. “San and I almost stayed in because he looked so bad. And then he started talking.” Wooyoung broke off his thought with a laugh. “We didn’t know what to do. He’s the happiest and most relaxed I’ve seen him in years.”

Hongjoong let out a huff of air. “You know what I did. You even picked out the cane.”

“Can you keep doing it?” Wooyoung asked. “Actually, can you just admit your feelings so you can stick around? I love seeing him this happy.”

“Don’t,” Hongjoong warned, his tone suddenly sharp.

Wooyoung went quiet and Hongjoong let out a heavy sigh.

“Aren’t you supposed to reality check me? He’s just like that because he got the impact play he needed emotionally and physically. It has nothing to do with me. It could have been you and he’d be this happy.”

“Oh,” Wooyoung breathed out. “I don’t know if you’re right.

“I am. It’s fine.” Hongjoong dismissed him. “I need to sleep so I can be awake for tomorrow’s scene. I guess I have expectations to live up to now.”

“We’ll talk soon,” Wooyoung said, his voice softer.

“Night Wooyoung, tell San I said hi,” Hongjoong mumbled before he hung up.

He didn’t want to know any of that.

**

Sunday morning, Hongjoong woke later than he wanted to. The first thing he did was text Seonghwa a sleepy good morning and remind him to hit his water goal for the day. Hongjoong stared at the message longer than necessary before hitting send. The truth was, he wasn’t in the mood for a scene. His stomach churned at the thought of seeing Seonghwa again, though he knew he would do it anyway. By the time he stepped into Seonghwa’s apartment, he’d have walled himself off and, tucked every single feeling he had away. At least, that was what he told himself.

Hongjoong didn’t know if he had ever been in love before, not like this anyway. His past relationships couldn’t compare to what he felt for Seonghwa. It didn’t matter though. In a few months, Seonghwa would be gone. Maybe it would take a year, if Hongjoong was lucky. Someone else would see what he saw and wouldn’t hesitate. They would snatch Seonghwa up without a second thought. Seonghwa didn’t want to be looked at like he was a prize, but he was something that deserved to be won.

What would another man do if they undressed Seonghwa right now? Hongjoong wasn’t sure how bad the marks were, but he knew they were going to last over a week even if Seonghwa treated them well and used his bruise cream.

Hongjoong closed his eyes, and let the ache press deeper. The thought of anyone else seeing those marks, his marks, was unbearable.

“You look like shit,” Mingi commented flatly when Hongjoong finally left his bedroom.

“Tired,” Hongjoong waved his hand.

“You’re going to see your man like that?” Mingi questioned.

Hongjoong looked at the time on his phone, “in a few yeah. We have another scene.”

“Are you not into what you’re doing?” Mingi pushed further.

“I mostly am. The scene the other night was just a lot,” Hongjoong didn’t even want to address the your man comment.

“Good a lot?” Mingi asked.

“Just a lot,” Hongjoong shrugged. “One full day is a quick turnaround even if I enjoy what’s going on. You know?”

“Yeah,” Mingi nodded. “Try and have fun. I’m meeting Yunho at the gym so we can spy on Yeosang and that guy.”

“Oh?” Hongjoong perked up. “You have to tell me everything. He won’t talk about it at all. I know more about the guy the kid at Seonghwa’s office is crushing on. He asked how to show that he was into other men without being loud about it.”

“Baby gays,” Mingi pouted.

“So cute I know,” Hongjoong nodded. “Have fun being nosy.”

“Have fun with your sex thing,” Mingi laughed as he waved off Hongjoong and left the apartment.

Hongjoong left the apartment soon after and texted Seonghwa to make sure he had stayed hydrated. Both messages he sent went unanswered, but he knew that Seonghwa was obeying him. He obviously had no proof, but Hongjoong trusted that Seonghwa would be a good boy for him.

Then, almost like Seonghwa knew what Hongjoong was thinking, he texted asking to use the bathroom. Hongjoong replied with a quick no, and let Seonghwa know that he was on his way.

When Hongjoong got to Seonghwa’s apartment, holding two cups of lemonade, he was completely shocked that Seonghwa wasn’t dancing around with the need to pee. He looked completely normal, and just as composed as he’d look any other time.

“This is for you,” Hongjoong handed over the drink.

“Thank you,” Seonghwa took a long sip.

Hongjoong wanted to press on his lower stomach and see how desperate he really was.

“Can I have yours too?” Seonghwa asked.

Hongjoong handed over the second drink and watched amused as Seonghwa rushed to put both cups in the fridge. He shuffled back to Hongjoong and quickly took his shoes off when he stood back up Hongjoong couldn’t help but notice how close they were. If he took a deep breath their chests would have touched.

When Seonghwa’s gaze met his, Seonghwa leaned in and pressed their lips together.

Hongjoong blinked in surprise, heart hammering in his chest. What was happening? Hongjoong had kissed plenty of people before but never anyone who made him ache. He didn’t even know they could kiss. They had never agreed not to, but there had never been a discussion consenting to it either.

The kiss deepened, Seonghwa tilted his head and let his lips part just enough to push his tongue into Hongjoong’s mouth to explore. The sound Hongjoong made was embarrassing, but he moved his hand up to Seonghwa’s face to hold him in place anyway. There was no way that Hongjoong was going to let this end soon.

He titled his head up further and avoided the urge to lift up onto his toes. This was the first time that Hongjoong had really noticed the difference in their height. It didn’t matter though, Seonghwa’s tongue was in his mouth and it didn’t seem like he wanted to stop either.

Seonghwa’s hands grabbed at his hips and Hongjoong let out another embarrassing needy noise. Maybe Seonghwa had actually felt something the other night too, maybe everything was about to change for them.

No. Hongjoong couldn’t think like that. He couldn’t get his hopes up for something that wasn’t likely to happen. What they were doing needed to stop.

Hongjoong broke the kiss, and he looked up at Seonghwa panting.

“Oh my god I’m sorry,” Seonghwa’s eyes went wide, and he dropped his hands from Hongjoong’s hips. “We should have talked about that. I just did it. I don’t even know why. I just wanted to kiss you, so I did.”

“It’s okay,” Hongjoong laughed. “Kissing is okay.”

“I should have asked,” Seonghwa still looked horrified.

“Yes, but it’s okay.” Hongjoong said calmly even though his insides were on fire.

“So, we can keep doing that?” Seonghwa asked.

“Like right now or in general?” Hongjoong channeled his nerves into looking amused.

Seonghwa blinked, “in general. Right now, I need to start the scene.”

“Oh?” Hongjoong’s eyebrows went up and he finally gave into his urge to reach out and press on Seonghwa’s lower stomach.

“Sir,” Seonghwa’s eyes went wide and he jumped backwards.

Hongjoong grinned at him, wide and wolfish. He was going to enjoy this more than he thought he was going to.

“Where are we doing the scene?” Hongjoong asked. “Which has started by the way so watch your mouth.”

Seonghwa’s plush, pretty, and undeniably beautiful mouth, that Hongjoong now knew the taste of.

“Bedroom. I got it ready,” Seonghwa smiled, still out of arms reach.

Hongjoong was going to take him apart. All of his earlier apprehension was gone just like he knew it would be.

When they got to the bedroom Hongjoong saw that the bed was completely stripped aside from one sheet. He suspected that there was also some kind of waterproof liner under it.

“That’s going to be enough?” Hongjoong asked.

“There’s a rubber sheet under the cloth one,” Seonghwa said his cheeks going red.

“Okay that’s good,” Hongjoong nodded.

“You could just let me go and watch and then fuck me,” Seonghwa nodded to himself. “That would be fine.”

Hongjoong let out a loud laugh, “there’s no way you’re going to be shy about it now.”

“I’m not shy, I have just need to pee,” Seonghwa shifted his hips.

“Then I guess you should get naked,” Hongjoong waved his hand.

Seonghwa nodded curtly and pulled his shirt off. His movements were extremely slow and deliberate for someone that apparently had to piss that badly. Maybe it would have been better if Hongjoong had shown up late and really kept him waiting. He couldn’t go back in time though he could only draw out the inevitable.

Hongjoong was never going to get tired of the sight of Seonghwa’s long, lean body being revealed but this time Seonghwa had a surprise for him. Rather than his typical feminine panties Seonghwa had on a pair of pretty blue briefs. They were stained wet at the front and Hongjoong couldn’t help his smirk.

“Is that precum or piss Seonghwa?” Hongjoong teased.

“I don’t,” Seonghwa turned bright red at the question. “Pee.”

Hongjoong breathed in. Apparently, he had calculated wrong, “get on the bed.”

Seonghwa hesitated and Hongjoong moved forward he pushed Seonghwa onto the bed and was surprised at how easily the other man went down. Seonghwa bounced on his back and Hongjoong flipped him over. He enjoyed the upper hand and the playful turn the scene had taken.

“Baby I can already see the marks I left,” Hongjoong cooed as he straddled Seonghwa’s knees.

The lines from the caning were still red and bruised around the edges. It wasn’t as much damage as Hongjoong thought there was going to be, but it still wasn’t great. A series of lines striped down Seonghwa’s ass and onto his thighs.

“I like them,” Seonghwa whined. “I need to go to the bathroom.”

“Not going to happen,” Hongjoong slapped Seonghwa’s ass.

“Sir,” Seonghwa gasped before he tried to crawl away.

“Stay where you are,” Hongjoong grumbled and smacked Seonghwa’s ass a second time. “We’re having fun, but you still need to be good.”

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa mumbled while he buried his head in one of his arms. His other arm snuck down between his body and his bed.

“Are you touching yourself?” Hongjoong grabbed a handful of Seonghwa’s ass. It might not have been massive, but it was enough for him to grab.

Seonghwa hissed and shifted his hips down, “I’m going to have an accident.”

“Then I guess I should get inside of you,” Hongjoong rolled off Seonghwa’s legs.

“Yes please,” Seonghwa flipped back over and pushed his briefs down.

“I didn’t tell you to do any of that,” Hongjoong frowned. “Where’s the lube.”

“Drawer,” Seonghwa answered quickly.

“Pull those up and turn back over,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’m going to ruin those briefs.”

Seonghwa looked at him, eyes wide and pupils blown. Hongjoong loved it. He knew that Seonghwa had no idea what he had planned for him and that was the best part of the night. If Hongjoong was honest he wasn’t even completely sure what his next move was. All he knew was that he wanted to tease Seonghwa until he let everything go.

Which is how he ended up between Seonghwa’s thighs mouthing at his cock through the fabric of his briefs. Hongjoong mostly avoided the wet spot but some of the bitter taste got in his mouth anyway. Somehow it was more of a turn on than anything else.

“That’s dirty,” Seonghwa commented as his hips jerked.

“Because you’re dirty,” Hongjoong answered.

He placed a hand flat on Seonghwa’s lower stomach and pushed down. Seonghwa let out an inhuman howl and Hongjoong watched amazed as the wet spot grew.

“Don’t you dare,” Hongjoong warned. “Not yet.”

“Hurts,” Seonghwa whined.

“Good thing you like it when it hurts,” Hongjoong shot back.

Hongjoong knew that he needed to speed up the timeline of what he was doing. As much as he wanted to play between Seonghwa’s legs and tease him he had to move onto prepping Seonghwa. He didn’t want the other man to let go before he was being fucked.

“Did you play with yourself, or did you just clean yourself out?” Hongjoong asked as he pulled down Seonghwa’s briefs roughly revealing Seonghwa’s erection.

“I prepped,” Seonghwa answered simply.

“Of course you did,” Hongjoong laughed. “No more of that. Ever again. If I want you prepped I’ll do it myself.”

“If?” Seonghwa echoed.

“If,” Hongjoong nodded firmly.

Hongjoong dropped the conversation there. Instead of talking, he reached for Seonghwa’s thighs and spread them wide, guiding the pliant weight of his body open. Hongjoong settled himself in the space he had just made and took his time. His gaze roamed over Seonghwa’s flushed body and the way his muscles twitched as he tried not to fidget.

He slicked his fingers generously with lube, then ran them slowly down Seonghwa’s balls, deliberately teasing, before pressing lower. The glide down was easy, and when Hongjoong reached the tight ring of muscle, he didn’t hesitate. He pushed in, savoring the sharp gasp that left Seonghwa’s lips.

Hongjoong knew he wasn’t an expert when it came to piss play. But he understood the way the a man’s body worked well enough to know that too much prostate stimulation could trick Seonghwa’s body. It would make him feel like he was on the edge of losing control.

Seonghwa squirmed on Hongjoong’s fingers, his thighs trembled as he grabbed at the sheets. “W-wait, stop for a second,” he blurted, his voice tight.

Hongjoong froze, brows lifting. “Too much?”

Seonghwa shook his head quickly, cheeks flushed. He pressed a hand to his stomach, whining. “No, it’s just. I need to pee.”

Hongjoong’s grin spread slowly, a spark of mischief in his eyes. “Isn’t that the point baby?”

“Don’t tease me,” Seonghwa groaned, covering his face with his arm. “It’s embarrassing. What if I actually pee?”

“I want that,” Hongjoong cut in, leaning down until his lips brushed Seonghwa’s ear. His voice was low and playful. “Isn’t that what you want too? Wouldn’t it feel so good to just be able to let go?”

Seonghwa peeked at him from under his arm, pouting. “This feels like torture.”

Hongjoong chuckled, nipping lightly at his jaw. “I think you’re enjoying it.”

Seonghwa squirmed again, biting his lip hard to muffle a sound. “I hate you.”

“No, you don’t,” Hongjoong shot back with a wicked smile, pressing down just enough to make Seonghwa gasp.

“I do,” Seonghwa’s breathing started to pick up. “I really can’t. Oh fuck.”

Hongjoong watched amazed as a stream of liquid dribbled out of Seonghwa’s cock. It pooled in his belly button and Seonghwa buried his face in his hands completely embarrassed by the action.

“Please tell me you’re green because I am so turned on right now,” Hongjoong let his fingers slide out of Seonghwa’s body.

“Green,” Seonghwa nodded.

Hongjoong wiped his fingers off on his shirt before he threw it to the side, and fumbled to get his jeans and boxers off. After nearly falling off the bed he managed to get them off and he tossed them in the same direction as his shirt. His boxers were a little easier to get off and his socks were the quickest part.

He needed to be inside of Seonghwa.

“Hongjoong I need you,” Seonghwa whined. Hongjoong’s head snapped up. He vaguely remembered saying that Seonghwa could use his name during scenes, but it felt so different than being called Sir.

“Does it hurt?” Hongjoong asked.

Seonghwa shook his head, “stings. I feel so full but I want you too.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded.

Hongjoong was never going to deny Seonghwa anything. He quickly lined his cock up with Seonghwa’s hole and watched as he sunk into his partner’s body. Seonghwa took it as well as he did the first time only now Hongjoong could watch him grimace. Hongjoong didn’t know if it was from the stretch or from needing to piss.

“Every time you push deeper, I swear I’m going to let go. I can’t tell if I need to stop or if I want more.” Seonghwa rambled.

“You can let go,” Hongjoong said as he started rocking back and forth fucking Seonghwa at a slow and steady pace.

“It’ll be messy,” Seonghwa whined. “Please don’t make me.”

A light bulb went off in Hongjoong’s head. Seonghwa wanted him to make him piss himself.

He could do that.

First, he angled his hips so that he hit Seonghwa’s prostate and then he quickened his pace. It should be easy enough to unravel Seonghwa this way. If Hongjoong was confident in anything it was his ability to be a good top.

That wasn’t all he was here for though.

Hongjoong moved his hand against his stomach, just above where his cock laid hard and begging for attention. This time when he pressed down, he did it with more purpose than the teasing way he had pushed earlier that night.

“No no no no,” Seonghwa chanted.

Then Seonghwa let go.

Hongjoong moved his hand and leaned back to watch as he continued to fuck Seonghwa. His piss was everywhere. It pooled in his abs before it trickled down the sides of his torso and Hongjoong was so thankful for the protective sheet on the bed even though the normal sheet was absorbing most of it.

He couldn’t believe that he got to see Seonghwa at his most submissive multiple times that week.

Seonghwa had his face hidden in embarrassment and Hongjoong couldn’t have that. Rather than requesting anything he moved Seonghwa’s arm himself and looked at him seriously before his gaze went back to Seonghwa’s cock that was somehow still pissing.

“This is so fucking hot what the fuck,” Hongjoong mumbled out.

“Embarrassing,” Seonghwa whined.

“But you’re so dirty bunny, doing this suits you,” Hongjoong teased as he quickened his pace.

“No,” Seonghwa gasped out as he arched as much as he could.

Hongjoong didn’t even care that Seonghwa was pressing his piss soaked torso into him. Even though it had already cooled some, the feeling lit up something inside of Hongjoong. When Seonghwa had finally stopped, Hongjoong found himself wishing that the other man still had more left in him. He had no idea that he was going to enjoy this so much.

“Don’t you want to cum bunny?” Hongjoong teased.

“Yes,” Seonghwa cried out as he started to claw Hongjoong’s back looking for more.

“You need to cum on my cock,” Hongjoong stated firmly.

He had no idea if Seonghwa could even do that. They hadn’t really talked about it, and he knew he was taking a huge leap of faith. Then, seconds later Hongjoong felt Seonghwa’s cock twitched under his stomach as Seonghwa’s entire face tightened before it went lax and his jaw opened.

That answered that question. Seonghwa could come untouched, and over stimulated.

Hongjoong didn’t hold himself back any longer. He let most of his weight fall onto Seonghwa as he came into him. He risked another kiss and Seonghwa quickly moved his hands to hold Hongjoong’s head in place. It was a dirty kiss full of tongue, and Hongjoong only broke it off because he couldn’t breathe anymore.

Hongjoong pulled out of Seonghwa and flopped over into a regrettably cold wet spot on the bed.

“We need to shower right now,” Seonghwa groaned but didn’t move.

“Let me breathe a little first,” Hongjoong whined and moved onto his side. “That was so hot.”

Seonghwa’s face turned pink.

“I want to do more with you being embarrassed. I liked that so much,” Hongjoong rambled on before he leaned forward to give Seonghwa a small kiss. “Wait sorry. What are the rules with that? We never talked about kissing.”

“Oh my god,” Seonghwa covered his face. “I don’t know I just wanted to, so I did. I’m sorry.”

“It can be a thing,” Hongjoong answered a little too quickly. “I mean I’m okay with it for scenes and stuff.”

“Stuff?” Seonghwa asked with wide bright eyes.

“Aftercare?” Hongjoong looked away and missed Seonghwa’s face falling.

“That makes sense,” Seonghwa sat up. “Please come give me aftercare me in the shower.”

“Sheets off the bed first,” Hongjoong pointed out. “You’ll be thankful you did it when you were already messy.”

Seonghwa looked at him with complete shock.

“Don’t look at me like that,” Hongjoong laughed.

“Can you start the shower while I take care of the sheets,” Seonghwa swallowed. “Sir?”

Hongjoong nodded. He wasn’t sure if the Sir was a signal to keep the scene going or if it was just Seonghwa still coming down. It didn’t matter. He’d happily go with either option.

Once he was in the bathroom it took a few tries till he remembered the magic combination of buttons that Seonghwa had shown him. Hongjoong stepped into the shower and didn’t waste any time stepping under the spray. He groaned in satisfaction at the feeling and jumped when another stream of water hit him.

“It was built for two people,” Seonghwa explained simply. “Two shower heads so no one is ever cold.”

“Makes sense,” Hongjoong nodded as Seonghwa got into the shower.

“Do you,” Seonghwa breathed out and blinked as his hair got wet enough to stick down to his head and face. “Do you have to go?”

Hongjoong tilted his head and made a face like he didn’t understand the question. “I can stay for a while.”

“No, not go leave,” Seonghwa sighed, as he lifted a hand, and gestured vaguely downward toward his dick. His cheeks flushed pink even under the heat of the water. “Go like…”

“Oh.” Hongjoong’s eyes flicked down to Seonghwa’s soft cock before they snapped back to his face. He nodded slowly. His lips twitched up into a smile. “That kind of go.”

Seonghwa frowned, looking both embarrassed and stubborn.

“I need you to ask properly,” Hongjoong said, voice calm but firm as he leaned one hand against the tile beside Seonghwa’s head.

“But…” Seonghwa’s pout deepened, his body curling in on itself as though he could hide from the demand.

“You can have whatever you want,” Hongjoong continued simply, almost conversational, though his eyes burned with challenge, “you just have to ask for it.”

“Do you have to pee?” Seonghwa couldn’t look Hongjoong in the eyes as he asked the question.

“I could,” Hongjoong moved his hand and took a small step back. He liked embarrassed Seonghwa but he didn’t want to push him too far.

“Can you do it,” Seonghwa stepped out of the water and got on his knees. “In my mouth?”

His voice was shaky at best and the request hit Hongjoong like a train. He was expecting Seonghwa to want to be pissed on. Never in a million years would he expect that kind of a request from Seonghwa. What did it matter though, it wasn’t unhealthy, and Hongjoong had just been rolling around in Seonghwa’s cold piss moments before.

He could do this.

“Well…” Hongjoong moved to stand in front of Seonghwa. “Put it in your mouth then.”

With a grace Hongjoong didn’t know a man could have Seonghwa dipped his head forward and took Hongjoong’s soft cock into his mouth. He had hardly washed it after it had been in Seonghwa’s ass and now it was in his mouth.

How was he getting hard?

Seonghwa moaned once he noticed how well Hongjoong was reacting to the stimulation.

Hongjoong shifted his weight from foot to foot. His shoulders were tense as the water continued to beat down on his back. The pressure in his bladder was sharp, but when he tried to relax, nothing happened.

He closed his eyes and took a slow breath, willing himself to let go. The urgency sat heavy and low in his stomach, his thighs clenched instinctively at the feeling. The longer he held it, the worse the ache grew, until it felt like every nerve in his lower body was aware of the pressure.

“Come on,” he muttered under his breath, frustrated. His muscles ached from holding back, but the harder he tried, the more his body resisted. The need was there, desperate and painful, but the release felt impossible.

And then, the tight knot in his lower stomach let go. Hongjoong was so focused on his relief that he nearly missed the sight of Seonghwa. The other man was on his knees, eyes squeezed shut, his entire focus on swallowing everything. Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa’s throat bobbed and he tried to slow his stream down, but that wasn’t going to happen.

Seonghwa backed off, and let the piss in his mouth fall down over his chin and his chest before he took a few deep breaths. Hongjoong grabbed his now, very, hard cock and aimed it at Seonghwa’s chest. He finished there, panting like he had just run a marathon.

“Sir can I suck your cock?” Seonghwa asked.

Hongjoong didn’t answer, he thrust his hips forward until his cock was down the back of Seonghwa’s throat. Seonghwa grabbed his thighs, and Hongjoong waited a beat for a pinch that never came. It was just a strong grip, something to anchor Seonghwa.

This time Hongjoong was going to use him like Seonghwa had requested the other night. Hongjoong pulled back and fucked forward. A sick choking noise left Seonghwa’s throat, but it didn’t stop Hongjoong from setting up a rhythm. He could have gone faster, but Hongjoong didn’t truly know where Seonghwa’s limits were. Hongjoong settled on a steady pace as his hands came down to hold Seonghwa’s head steady.

Every time he bottomed out Seonghwa’s throat made a wet and obscene noise that echoed off the walls. Hongjoong couldn’t believe that his pretty little bunny had just willingly swallowed his piss. They had been more intimate that weekend than Hongjoong had ever expect them to be.

He came, not as much as before but it was enough for Seonghwa to need to swallow it down.

“Fuck,” Hongjoong breathed out.

“Let me clean us up,” Seonghwa stood slowly with Hongjoong’s help. “Please don’t do it I want to.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong looked at him. “Green?”

“Yes green,” Seonghwa nodded. “I’ve just never done any of that before and I never thought I would. I don’t know who possessed me today.”

“Whoever it is, they’re pretty cool,” Hongjoong laughed.

Seonghwa shot him a serious look and Hongjoong shut his mouth but he kept the teasing smile on his face. He was happy to let Seonghwa go through the ritual of cleaning them both off. Hongjoong didn’t know why Seonghwa felt like he needed to pamper them, but he knew enough to not argue with it.

“I let you clean me, you need to let me put some ointment on your ass,” Hongjoong said as Seonghwa passed him a towel.

“I like the marks,” Seonghwa frowned.

“You can like them all you want as long as they’re healing well,” Hongjoong let out a dry laugh. “Come on go lay down somewhere on your stomach.”

Hongjoong followed Seonghwa back to his bedroom, and was surprised to see the other man flop onto his stomach on the bed that was already fully made. He didn’t think Seonghwa had enough time to do all of that before he had gotten into the shower.

“Cream is in the drawer next to the lube,” Seonghwa pointed.

Hongjoong laughed. He focused on getting the cream before he really looked at Seonghwa’s ass. It had settled into a mess of purple, red and a sickly looking brown. The colors weren’t sexy, but it was obviously healing well, and he was happy that he hadn’t done too much damage. Hongjoong had defiantly paid a little too much attention to some spots, but it was okay he hadn’t broken the skin or anything.

“I’m sorry.” Seonghwa suddenly said.

“For what?” Hongjoong asked quietly. “We’re done by the way.”

“Making you do that in the shower,” Seonghwa cleared his throat, it had to hurt.

“You didn’t make me do anything.” Hongjoong promised. “Please don’t apologize.”

“But…” Seonghwa started.

“No.” Hongjoong cut him off. “I know how to say no, I know how to stop a scene. I was into all of it. Piss might not be a kink I want to do all of the time, but you did just make me cum twice.”

“You’re young.” Seonghwa deadpanned.

Hongjoong rolled his eyes, “I’m not that young. Don’t start.”

“You promise you’re okay?” Seonghwa frowned.

Hongjoong nodded firmly. “Very okay. And now I’m going to put something comfortable on so I can head home and crash because I am too old to cum twice and I need a nap.”

Seonghwa giggled, and Hongjoong loved the sound of it. It was another time where he didn’t want to leave, but he wasn’t going to make excuses to stay. Seonghwa would ask for him to stick around if he needed him to.

“I might need to call you later.” Seonghwa sighed. “If I still feel like I made you do that.”

“You can always call me,” Hongjoong nodded. “Now come put my shoes on so I can go nap.”

“What if you’re asleep when I call?” Seonghwa chewed on his lip.

“What if…” Hongjoong took a deep breath. “I take a nap here?”

“Oh?” Seonghwa’s face lit up. “Yeah, that’s better, that will work. In my bed not the couch. I’ll sleep too.”

Together? Hongjoong could feel his heartrate pick up. He wanted this, but he knew his mind wasn’t going to be able to separate anything anymore. Seonghwa was a man that he loved, and a man that had given him everything that weekend.

“Okay,” Hongjoong said softly before he got back into the bed and under the covers.

Everything smelled like Seonghwa.

“You want that side?” Seonghwa asked as he looked over at Hongjoong.

“Is that okay?” Hongjoong asked with one eye open.

“That used to be my side, but I sleep over here now or in the middle.” Seonghwa got into the bed slowly as he spoke.

“Sleep in the middle.” Hongjoong answered with a yawn.

“So can we can kiss and cuddle now?” Seonghwa asked quietly as he settled against Hongjoong’s chest.

“That’s aftercare.” Hongjoong mumbled as he fell asleep with an arm wrapped tightly around Seonghwa.

Chapter Text

At noon on Tuesday Hongjoong got an unexpected call to the office. He gave Yeosang a sideways glance and shrugged before he left the room and headed down the hallway. There was no way he was in trouble, but you could never tell with school systems and parents. They could be completely unpredictable. Hongjoong couldn’t think of any instances where a parent would be upset with him, but then again, he couldn’t be sure. There was one child that was a little behind, and his father was unwilling to recognize that fact or help. Maybe he had finally noticed and decided to complain.

When Hongjoong got to the office he was surprised with a flower arrangement, and four medium sized bags. They had Seonghwa’s company name printed on them, and his name along with the names of his friends’ handwritten on them.

His cheeks got warm instantly.

“A courier just dropped all this off.” The secretary waved her hand. “There’s a tray of desserts too.”

“There’s a what?” Hongjoong’s mouth was dry. How did Seonghwa even know what school he worked at? He didn’t remember ever mentioning the exact name.

Yeosang.

Hongjoong couldn’t prove it but somehow this was Yeosang’s fault.

“This is a very expensive brand.” She pointed to the bags. “This must be an important friend.”

Had Hongjoong forgotten his own birthday? No, it wasn’t late enough into autumn for that. His head was spinning. Why would Seonghwa do this to him? Not to him, for him. There was no way that he deserved to be spoiled like this.

“Can I keep everything in here until the end of the day?” Hongjoong asked in a panicked tone. “I don’t want the kids too excited or the parents asking questions.”

“How are you even going to get it all home?” She laughed as she spoke.

“I don’t know.” Hongjoong’s anxiety was getting worse. “Make Yeosang help?”

Then he remembered the night he had gone to Seonghwa’s house and Seonghwa had done his makeup. The other man had offered to give his friends samples, and was very insistent that Hongjoong start using some kind of skin care. This was too much though. Everything in the bags was full size.

Hongjoong

I think this is too much

Seonghwa

You’re welcome puppy Dom enjoy being spoiled

Hongjoong choked on nothing. Was this now a game between the two of them? Could he outdo this kind of a gesture? He didn’t have the money for it, but he could try. Maybe it was time to find the vintage death star lego thing.

Hongjoong

Thank you. It’s too much.

Seonghwa

I could have done more

Just leave it at thank you

Hongjoong

Thank you

Seonghwa

Good puppy Dom

Hongjoong laughed at his phone.

“Look at that smile.” The secretary commented. “She must be very special.”

“They are,” Hongjoong nodded and put his phone in his pocket. “Thank you for keeping everything in here, you can have one of the desserts if you’d like.”

“Thank you, I will.” She bowed her head.

Hongjoong took another deep breath before he headed back down the hallway to his classroom. He could hear the kids outside of the door yelling the answers to the questions that Yeosang was asking them. Hongjoong was thankful for the gesture, but he still had to figure out the meaning of it.

Did it even have meaning? He knew Seonghwa, but he only knew the intimate details of him. Hongjoong knew what Seonghwa looked like when he came, he knew the way his hips swayed during impact play, and Hongjoong knew that he loved sweet smelling bath bombs and scalding hot water. Everything else about the other man was still a mystery.

When he slipped back into the room Yeosang shot him a look. Hongjoong gave him two thumbs up and sat down towards the back of the room. This was Yeosang’s section anyway, he could take some time to process what was happening.

The gifts also meant that Seonghwa had likely stalked Hongjoong’s social media without friending him so that he could see what Mingi and Yunho might need. He hadn’t ever looked at Seonghwa’s though. Mostly because he was scared to know what he’d find there. Yes, he wanted to see Seonghwa in his everyday life, but Hongjoong didn’t know how his jealousy would deal with seeing Seonghwa with anyone that wasn’t Wooyoung or San. There was no way he didn’t have other friends.

Hongjoong turned his chair and pulled his phone out. It was impulsive, stupid, and against school rules, but it was also desperate times.

He looked up the death star lego set that Seonghwa had mentioned once, and had to put his hand over his mouth to not react to the price. There was one near him though, still in the box, but ridiculously marked up. Before Hongjoong knew what he was doing he pressed the quick buy button and messaged the shop owner that he’d be picking it up later that day.

His attention turned back to the class, and Yeosang’s disappointed face. It must have been obvious that he was on the phone.

The second half of the school day dragged by and Hongjoong could not wait for the parents to come get their kids. Three of them were over ten minutes late, just barely missing the cut off for the kids being automatically put into an after-school activity.

“You need to come home with me.” Hongjoong said the second he was alone with Yeosang.

“This might be disappointing, but I don’t like you in that way.” Yeosang deadpanned.

“Not like that.” Hongjoong shot him a look. “Seonghwa sent me stuff, and now I have to send him stuff. I need help carrying everything.”

“I do not understand your relationship at all.” Yeosang shook his head. “Are you sure there’s nothing there?”

“Absolutely sure.” Hongjoong nodded firmly. He was in love, and doing stupid things, but it was nothing. “Also, he got you something so it’s not just stuff for me.”

“Oh?” Yeosang’s eyebrows went up.

“And don’t think I didn’t realize that he knows where I work because of you.” Hongjoong pointed at Yeosang. “So, you can stop pretending like you don’t know what’s going on.”

Yeosang raised his arms, “no one asked me where you worked. I don’t really talk to Seonghwa anyway.”

“It’s still your fault.” Hongjoong grumbled. “We have to make two stops on the way home.”

“Two?” Yeosang groaned. “I don’t want to be an accessory to your pining.”

“Yeah, well, too bad.” Hongjoong pulled Yeosang out of the room.

They settled on Yeosang holding flowers and the tray of desserts, and Hongjoong carrying the bags so he’d have room for the Death Star that he hadn’t told Yeosang about yet. He nearly ran down the street, his hips swaying as he dodged people in the crowd. The toy store was only a few blocks from the school, and then they could take the train to the flower shop.

It was an easy plan until he saw the size of the box. The toy store owner looked at him and chuckled. He offered to put sticky plastic handles on the box, but Hongjoong didn’t want to ruin it. The man even added in a free bag of lego figures. They were mostly characters, but there were a few smaller ships mixed in.

“I don’t think you were this bad when you were actually dating someone,” Yeosang grumbled. “You take that massive box, and give me a few bags.”

It was harder to get to the flower shop than Hongjoong anticipated. They must have looked like fools going down the street with both of their arms full. Hongjoong was just thankful that Yeosang was a good enough friend to play along with what he was doing. It was crazy and impulsive, but Hongjoong was in too deep to stop.

“You know,” Yeosang started. “You’re really limiting yourself when it comes to birthday and holiday gifts for him.”

Hongjoong looked at him. “There’s more adult things that I could get him.”

“Disgusting.” Yeosang looked away from him and shifted the bags in his hands.

“I don’t even know when his birthday is.” Hongjoong admitted.

“April.” Yeosang shrugged. “I forget the day though.”

Hongjoong nodded. He had plenty of time to figure out a birthday gift.

“There you are,” The ajumma said as she came out from the backroom.

She eyed everything he was holding and the flowers that Yeosang had in his hand.

“Those are mine.” She stated simply. “A very beautiful man came in and asked me to send them to a school with those bags. Why do you two like ugly bags so much?”

Seonghwa was in his flower shop? Seonghwa had talked to his sassy ajumma?

“It’s the brand he works for.” Hongjoong shrugged. “I need something big, and this has to go with it.” He set the death star on the counter.

“What about you? Is there a man you want to send flowers to?” She pointed at Yeosang.

Hongjoong laughed.

“I don’t think he’d like flowers.” Yeosang commented. “And it’s not official or anything yet. I can’t do all this.” He waved his hands at Hongjoong.

“That’s swee, but this one,” she pointed to Hongjoong. “He’s a mess.”

“Yeah, he is.” Yeosang smiled over at Hongjoong.

“I want roses.” Hongjoong nodded to himself. “Red, orange, yellow and pink.”

“Well, that’s a choice,” Yeosang set the items he was carrying down.

“That could look good. Spray roses though I think. With some greenery.” The ajumma nodded. “I can work with this.”

“A lot of them.” Hongjoong nodded firmly.

“Are you trying to outdo him or show him that if he does something nice for you that you’ll do something crazy?” Yeosang looked at Hongjoong seriously.

“He shouldn’t be spending money on me.” Hongjoong looked back at Yeosang. “That’s not the agreement.”

“That man is your sugar baby?” The woman cut in.

“No.” Hongjoong waved his hands. “We’re just not dating. So, I don’t need all this from him.”

“They’re not dating?” She looked away from Hongjoong to Yeosang.

He shrugged, “yeah I don’t know. We keep trying to get them together.”

It was exhausting to keep admitting that he had feelings for Seonghwa even if it was only in his head. Hongjoong loved him with a subtle persistence that followed him everywhere. It wasn’t something that he could escape, but Seonghwa didn’t love him back.

Hongjoong knew that he should have asked Seonghwa on a proper date weeks ago, but here they were, Hongjoong an absolute mess and Seonghwa bright and golden as always. Seonghwa had no idea how much pain Hongjoong was consistently in. Which was fine because Hongjoong never wanted him to know.

“How much?” Hongjoong said absently. He had no idea if they had continued to tease him or not.

“Oh, it’s like that now. So serious.” The ajumma smiled and laughed at him. “Free delivery for you again, it’s just a little more for the extra flowers.” She looked at Yeosang. “He’s my favorite customer.”

Hongjoong let out a dry laugh as he pulled his credit card out. After he bought the Death Star it was screaming at him to stop. Maybe next week, he was only going to stop when Seonghwa told him to.

The walk back to the apartment was quiet. He knew that Yeosang would have something shitty to say, but Hongjoong wasn’t going to regret the flowers or the gift no matter how extravagant they were.

Maybe he should start gifting Seonghwa more intimate things. Would Seonghwa show them off to whatever man he ended up picking? Long after he had left Hongjoong, while Hongjoong was still trying to pick up the pieces of his heart, while he was still trying to pretend like he had never fallen in love in his entire life.

“So seriously, why did you do all that?” Yeosang asked in the elevator as they went up to Hongjoong’s floor. “And we don’t need to talk about it if you don’t want to.”

“I don’t know.” Hongjoong sighed and rattled the bags in his hands. “It just happened.”

“You don’t always have to let the thoughts win.” Yeosang laughed as the elevator opened and he walked down the hallway like he was going to his own apartment.

“He just deserves to be spoiled.” Hongjoong grumbled.

“Let him do nice things for you without trying to one up him.” Yeosang shook his head as he punched in the code to Hongjoong’s apartment. “You’re lucky that he likely knows you well enough to roll his eyes at you.”

“Yeah, he should be used to me by now.” Hongjoong shrugged as they walked through the door and kicked their shoes off.

“What did Wooyoung give you?” Mingi’s voice came out of nowhere.

“Seonghwa gave us stuff.” Hongjoong corrected. “This is for you.”

“Yunho we have presents from Hongjoong’s boyfriend,” Mingi called out.

“He’s not my boyfriend.” Hongjoong stated firmly. “I really need everyone to stop saying that.”

“Yeah, don’t reinforce the wrong idea.” Yeosang set the flowers down on their kitchen counter. “Do you even have something to put these in? Do we need to go back to the flower ajumma?”

“We have something from when Mingi broke his arm his mom sent flowers. It’s under the sink.” Yunho said as he appeared. “Where’s my stuff?”

Hongjoong held the bag out. “And there’s desserts.”

“I’m kind of into the fact that they think we’re helpless.” Mingi admitted with a grin. “We’re really winning.”

Hongjoong laughed. Maybe he should merge his friend groups. He could just start slow with Wooyoung and San. Then when things with Seonghwa cooled off, and it didn’t hurt as much as Hongjoong knew it was going to, he could introduce Mingi and Yunho to Seonghwa. Even Jongho could come along. They had to do something, as a group, to thank the older men eventually.

“Is this skincare?” Yunho lifted a bottle up. “Does Seonghwa know how expensive this stuff is?”

“He works there so I assume so.” Hongjoong shrugged and reached for the tray that had the desserts on it. He busied himself with looking them over to avoid his friend’s reactions.

“Oh, so, he is a sugar daddy.” Yunho’s jaw dropped.

“Insane that he’s been called your sugar baby and daddy today.” Yeosang laughed as he went through his bag. “How did he color match so well. This is the perfect foundation.”

“Instagram.” Hongjoong answered flatly as he picked up a slice of green cake.

Mingi sat on the couch and held up his own foundation. “So… you and Seonghwa,” he started slowly. “There’s something there, right? I mean we know you like him, but does he like you?”

Hongjoong froze mid bite. “What?”

Yunho grinned as he continued to pull items out of the bag and look them over. “Come on, Joong. You’re terrible at hiding it. It’s obvious. Plus, I think you’ve told all of us that you like him already and you just don’t want to do anything about it.”

Hongjoong opened his mouth, ready to deny everything, but Yeosang cut in before he could. His tone was calm, but his eyes were sharp. “The only thing we don’t know,” he said, “is whether he feels the same way about you.”

That hit harder than Hongjoong wanted it to. His jaw tightened, and he forced himself to shrug as he swallowed his bite of cake. “He doesn’t.”

“You don’t know that,” Mingi shot back immediately.

“Yes, I do,” Hongjoong replied, his voice quieter this time.

Yunho leaned forward, his teasing smile faded quickly into a more serious expression. “You really don’t think he could have feelings for you?”

Hongjoong looked down at his hands. The truth that he was in love felt like it was pressed against his chest, threatening to break free. “It’s not that kind of thing between us. Not for him.”

The room went quiet. For once, none of them had a clever comeback.

He could admit he was in love now. Yes, they were teasing him, but Hongjoong had faith that his friends knew when to stop and turn serious. It might be the heads up that they needed so they could be there to help him pick up the pieces when the time came.

“Why are you so sure?” Mingi replied. His expression had also turned more serious. “Did he tell you that?”

“He doesn’t have to,” Hongjoong muttered.

Yunho leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “That’s a stupid excuse. I think you’re just scared to find out.”

Hongjoong’s jaw clenched. “I know him. If he felt that way, he’d say something.”

Yeosang’s eyes narrowed. “Or maybe he hasn’t because he thinks you don’t.”

That hit him hard enough that his throat went dry. He opened his mouth but no words came.

Mingi smirked, but his tone was gentler than his expression. “Face it, hyung. You’ve decided for him, but you haven’t actually asked.”

Yunho leaned closer, almost challenging. “What if you’re wrong? What if he’s waiting on you?”

Hongjoong’s heart hammered painfully. He wanted to shut them down, to change the subject, but their words opened the cracks in the wall that he had build around his feelings. Hongjoong wanted to argue. He wanted to tell them that they didn’t understand and that everything wasn’t that simple. There was still a small stubborn part of him that hoped they were right though.

That hope flickered to life inside of him. It was quick and dangerous. What if they were right? What if Seonghwa did feel something but he hadn’t said anything because he was scared. The thought made his stomach knot with fear, what if Hongjoong had caused his own pain?

He was so sure about Seonghwa’s feelings though, and hope was such a dangerous thing.

“I’m not wrong.” Hongjoong stated simply and firmly.

Yunho looked from Mingi to Yeosang helplessly. Yeosang shrugged and Mingi sat back with a small box in his hands.

“Anyway, what did everyone get from Seonghwa?” Mingi asked.

Hongjoong moved to sit on the couch and sank back into it. He let his shoulders slump as if the weight of his own thoughts could crush him. His fists unclenched slowly, but the ache in his chest lingered, sharper than before. He wondered if Seonghwa was on one of his dates, smiling at someone else, laughing with them, or just being with them in ways Hongjoong would never be allowed.

The thought hurt more than he expected. Seonghwa was dating other people. That was the beginning and the end of it, but Hongjoong still wanted him. Not just the trust, or the closeness that their scenes brought, but everything. He wanted to fight with Seonghwa, he wanted to get annoyed at him, he wanted to live with Seonghwa in the little domestic moments that they could create.

He hated himself for thinking that way. Hongjoong was carrying the weight of his feelings alone. Seonghwa didn’t love him back, and maybe he never could. And yet, he couldn’t stop imagining the “what ifs” that were just out of reach.

What if Seonghwa finally noticed how Hongjoong looked at him?

Hongjoong let the ache fill him. It was better to just lean into the pain at this point. He couldn’t have Seonghwa and that was fine. His longing, his jealousy, his love couldn’t be returned. This was it for him.

Right now, he’d be content with watching his friends go through their goodie bags, and he knew that he’d be starting a skincare routine that evening. Hongjoong would use the products until the logo left a bitter taste in his mouth.

He’d be fine, eventually, he just didn’t know when.

**

“So how are things with the guy?” Hongjoong asked as he handed over a drink and a brown bag to Jongho, leaning slightly over the desk.

“I think it’s going somewhere.” Jongho smiled, and Hongjoong froze for a moment. This was the first time he’d seen the other man smile with teeth, and it caught him off guard. He looked adorable. Jongho looked completely warm, and open. It was so different from the composed and indifferent image he usually projected.

“He knows you like guys now?” Hongjoong asked, matching his grin.

Jongho nodded eagerly. “Yeah, he saw the bi flag pin and commented that he should have a rainbow one. So, I gave him an LGBTQ flag that I had.”

Hongjoong laughed, shaking his head. “You just had the pin ready?”

“It came in a set with the other pin,” Jongho defended himself.

Hongjoong chuckled. “And you just conveniently had it on you?”

“Yes,” Jongho rolled his eyes. “Anyway, I think we’re going out soon. I asked him if he wanted to go get smoothies next door after we work out this weekend.”

“And he said yes?” Hongjoong leaned casually on the desk.

“Of course he said yes.” Jongho leaned back, looking pleased with himself.

“I’m happy for you.” Hongjoong offered a genuine smile, feeling lighter than he had in days.

Jongho tilted his head closer, a teasing glint in his eye. “How’s it going with your guy?”

Hongjoong’s face went pink instantly, and he panicked, standing up straighter in an attempt to recover. He took a step back, and collided with someone’s solid chest.

He froze, mortified, then slowly turned and lifted his gaze. His embarrassment deepened as he realized the chest belonged to Seonghwa.

“You have a guy?” Seonghwa’s eyebrows rose, curiosity plain in his expression.

“I… I guess so. Kinda,” Hongjoong mumbled, heat rushing to his ears.

Seonghwa’s eyes narrowed slightly, scanning Hongjoong’s face like he was evaluating him. “Do you get him insanely expensive gifts and flowers weekly?” His expression remained unreadable, but the question landed like a challenge.

Jongho jumped in. “I think he does,” he said brightly, oblivious to the awkward tension in the room.

It didn’t help. Seonghwa stiffened for a moment, then straightened his jacket, pulling the fabric down carefully. His face returned to a neutral mask, but the edge in his tone lingered. “I didn’t know teacher salaries paid that well.”

Hongjoong opened his mouth to defend himself, his mind scrambling for a response, but the words stuck somewhere between embarrassment and panic. He could feel his ears burning, and all he wanted was to disappear, or at least explain himself without revealing more than he was ready to.

“There’s no guy. I mean… it’s just…” Hongjoong trailed off, suddenly aware of how ridiculous he sounded.

“Just who?” Seonghwa pushed.

“You.” Hongjoong stated simply. “It’s just you.”

Seonghwa physically took a step back as shock spread over his expression.

“And I think it’s time to go to your office Sir.” Jongho said firmly. “I’m sure your coffee break is well earned.”

Hongjoong breathed out and noticed the two people that had just stepped off the elevator. They didn’t need to be doing whatever it was they were doing in front of strangers. They didn’t even need to be doing it in front of Jongho.

As he followed Seonghwa down the hallway Hongjoong realized that there was no way he was going to be able to negotiate a scene if the tension between them was that high. He wanted to spend the time before he got to Seonghwa’s office thinking about all the dirty things he wanted to do to the other man. Hongjoong didn’t want to be stuck, mortified not knowing who heard too much, and if he had to explain anything to Seonghwa.

Once the door was shut the words started to spill out of him.

“It’s a joke. My roommates do it too. I don’t even know if what we’re doing is supposed to be a secret or not. I think Jongho just figured it out because I’m here all the time and I guess he gets the flowers and stuff for you. I don’t know. I asked everyone not to joke around like that, but they still do. I don’t really have a lot of control over it.” Hongjoong took a breath.

Seonghwa held up his hand, “it’s okay. I shouldn’t have been jealous anyway.”

Hongjoong let the air out of lungs slowly.

“It’s not like I should be mad if you date anyway.” Seonghwa shook his head at himself. “It’s literally what I’m doing. I’d be a hypocrite. I just don’t like thinking about you with other people how you are with me.”

It was unfair. It was so completely and utterly unfair, but here Hongjoong was willing to put his feelings on the back burner and lay himself out for Seonghwa.

“I am not dating.” Hongjoong looked down. “I don’t think about dating.” He turned and set a cup of tea and a chocolate croissant down on Seonghwa’s desk. “I don’t want to do either of those things. You’re my only focus.”

“You could though.” Seonghwa pushed slightly.

“I don’t want to.” Hongjoong repeated himself.

Seonghwa shrunk slightly, “I’m sorry.”

“There is nothing to apologize for Seonghwa,” Hongjoong sighed. “My friends, and I guess Jongho, like to joke around. That’s all. You can be jealous of the thought of your Dom with someone else, just like I can be jealous if I think about someone else touching you.” He took a breath. He could do it now, he could confess. “But we know what we’re doing and we’re adults. This is what we agreed on, but we’re allowed to act like people too.”

Apparently Hongjoong was a coward.

“That’s…” Seonghwa frowned. “Insanely mature.”

“Yeah well,” Hongjoong shrugged and waved his hands. “I just want to get to the point where we are talking about our scene on Friday and it doesn’t feel awkward anymore.”

Seonghwa laughed, “don’t feel awkward. It’s us, we can’t be awkward.”

Hongjoong forced out a laugh. That was, at the very least, the truth. No matter how much anxiety he had leading up to their meetings he had never once felt weird once they had started things. Nothing else mattered in the moments where he was with Seonghwa and Seonghwa was his.

“Then knees.” Hongjoong pointed down as he adjusted his chair to the side.

He noticed Seonghwa’s phone uncharacteristically face up. Hongjoong was used to the shiny chrome of the case, not the black screen. When a notification popped up he looked away. Something important could be happening, or something that was simply none of his business. By the time he was done thinking about the phone Seonghwa had his pillow out and was on his knees.

“Did you have a better week?” Hongjoong questioned.

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded firmly.

“Then I have a request for this week.” Hongjoong smiled. “It might feel a little silly, but we’ve done some emotionally intense scenes lately so it might be nice to slow down a little bit.”

“That sounds good Sir.” Seonghwa smiled but Hongjoong didn’t miss the way his eyes looked at his phone on his desk.

Who was texting him?

“I’d like to use the bunny outfit.” Hongjoong started. “And a plug. I might get another toy and maybe a maid outfit but at least an apron.”

“I have a dress.” Seonghwa admitted.

“You have a maid dress?” Hongjoong shifted in his chair as jealousy flared in him. Seonghwa’s ex hadn’t seemed open-minded enough for something like that so who had seen Seonghwa dressed like that?

“It was a joke with Wooyoung and San.” Seonghwa waved his hand. “They ended up liking it, but my ex, well, he was judgmental.”

“Then please wear that and the rest of the accessories that I got, including the plug.” Hongjoong nodded to himself firmly.

“What’s the scene Sir?” Seonghwa tilted his head to the side like a puppy would.

Hongjoong breathed. “Domestic? I want you to do the things you’d like to if you had a partner who was into kink.”

Seonghwa’s face lit up, “so I pick that?”

“I guess so.” Hongjoong laughed lightly.

“Come hungry, or even early. We can do early. I want to cook for you.” Seonghwa nodded. “Then I want you to play with me.”

Hongjoong nodded, “I can do that. I have an idea.”

“Can you bring some work with you?” Seonghwa asked quietly. “Wait no. We can’t drink.”

“I’m not sure I’d want alcohol during our scene even if we were a couple.” Hongjoong shrugged. “We can start with you cooking for me and serving me. Are you good to wear a plug for that long?”

“Yes.” Seonghwa answered quickly.

“Bunny are you sneaking toys without telling me?” Hongjoong leaned forward.

“No Sir, I used to wear plugs a lot to tease myself. I don’t do that anymore though because I’ll want to cum and my orgasms are for you.” Seonghwa nodded and looked up at Hongjoong. His lashes were so long and dark.

Hongjoong felt his entire body warm up at the thought.

Seonghwa wasn’t his as a whole, but so many parts of him belonged to Hongjoong anyway. All of his pleasure belonged to Hongjoong, and his love of lingerie that Seonghwa had previously kept to himself. Hongjoong also doubted that anyone else had ever experienced Seonghwa’s submission the way he had either. Hongjoong knew that he was the only person who got to see Seonghwa at his most vulnerable.

The memory of Seonghwa crying as Hongjoong gave him everything he needed was burned into his mind. That image was something that Hongjoong now clung to whenever doubt clawed into his mind. No matter who Seonghwa smiled at, no matter who he said yes to having a date with, they would never see him stripped bare, physically and emotionally, like Hongjoong did.

But that knowledge was a double-edged sword. The exclusivity made Hongjoong’s chest swell with pride, yet it also hollowed him out. For all of the raw pieces of Seonghwa that belonged to him, there were still parts of Seonghwa that were completely closed off to Hongjoong. Parts that Hongjoong didn’t know if he’d ever see.

Hongjoong told himself that what he had was enough, even when he knew it wasn’t. He wanted more. For now, he had to be satisfied with the pieces Seonghwa offered; the trust, the submission, the fragile moments of honesty, and he had to be okay with that.

It was his own fault for being a coward anyway.

“What are you thinking about?” Seonghwa asked quietly.

“You,” Hongjoong smiled.

“I’m right here you don’t have to think about me.” Seonghwa smiled. “Sir?”

“Yes?” Hongjoong sighed. It had been such a weird visit.

“What’s your favorite food?” Seonghwa smiled softly.

“Meat?” Hongjoong laughed. “I don’t like vegetables.”

“You’ll like mine.” Seonghwa nodded firmly and mostly to himself. “And you’ll eat them to make me happy.”

“Bossy bunny,” Hongjoong grinned.

“Puppy Dom,” Seonghwa shot back.

Hongjoong laughed, “I guess we’re done for today. A nice easy one. Sorry it was weird at first.”

“It’s okay.” Seonghwa stood and wiped off his knees before he stood to grab the pillow. “I guess, according to you, we were both just being human.”

“Yeah.” Hongjoong moved his chair back into it’s proper position after he stood up.

Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa picked up his phone. The other man tapped at the screen and then a shy smile spread over his face quickly before he schooled his expression. Seonghwa couldn’t keep the smile away though. It twisted the corner of his lips up, and Hongjoong noted the giddiness in Seonghwa’s expression.

His mood soured immediately. Hongjoong didn’t want to jump to conclusions, but he knew what people looked like when they were talking to a crush.

“I’ll see myself out.” Hongjoong mumbled which made Seonghwa look up.

“I can walk you out.” Seonghwa scrambled to stand but the phone stayed in his hand.

“No, you can finish,” He waved his hand. “Whatever’s going on there.”

Seonghwa gave him a sad look, but Hongjoong walked out of the office anyway. He wasn’t about to stand around and watch Seonghwa smile at messages from another man.

On his way out he stopped to say goodbye to Jongho who just looked at him sadly.

“Listen.” Hongjoong said as he walked over to the desk. “Tell the guy that you like him. Being a coward won’t get you anywhere.”

“Hyung you could do the same thing.” Jongho offered.

“I can’t,” Hongjoong shook his head. It was weird to talk about Seonghwa without fully acknowledging that it was what they were doing. “But take my advice, okay?”

“I will, I promise,” Jongho nodded. “I’ll make sure he knows that I’m interested. I don’t want to lose him.”

“I have a friend that just started seeing someone too that he’s not official with yet.” Hongjoong smiled. “It’s nice to see you both happy.”

“You barely know me.” Jongho laughed.

“I know you’re a pain in my ass and so is he.” Hongjoong forced another laugh just to keep himself sane. He wasn’t going to let himself overthink anything with Seonghwa.

Hongjoong was about to walk away when he saw a flash of platinum blonde coming at him.

“I didn’t get to say thank you,” Seonghwa called out when he was finally close enough. “It’s insane that you got that Death Star. Do you even understand what you bought?”

“The first one that they came out with, the one you wanted,” Hongjoong looked at him distressed

“You got an extremely rare and expensive collector’s piece. Everything was still sealed, and that came out like twenty years ago. Plus, the extras! There were some things in that bag that I didn’t even know existed.”

“Oh.” Hongjoong blinked.

“So, thank you.” Seonghwa smiled. “I didn’t give you those samples to have you outdo me.”

“Those were not samples.” Hongjoong pointed at him. “Those were all full sizes, Park Seonghwa, don’t lie to me.”

Seonghwa bent in on himself slightly. He had been called out by his Dom and no submissive wanted that. The action was hardly noticeable though, it was something that only Hongjoong would be able to pick up on.

“They were still free and that counts as a sample.” Seonghwa shifted from foot to foot and looked up from the carpet to Hongjoong’s face. It was obvious there was something else he wanted to say but felt like he couldn’t.

“I’m not mad about the phone thing.” Hongjoong guessed at what was weighing on Seonghwa’s mind. “I’m just not used to you prioritizing your phone over me.”

“I’m sorry…”

“Don’t.” Hongjoong held up his hand. “It’s okay. I need to get home anyway I have a ton of grading to do. Everyone loved their gifts by the way. I think we’re planning on going out next week to show off the makeup.”

“You go out?” Seonghwa looked surprised.

“I try not to.” Hongjoong laughed. “It’s not my favorite thing to do, but sometimes I have to give into my friends.”

“Not on a Friday though right?” Seonghwa chewed on his bottom lip.

“Not on a Friday.” Hongjoong nodded obediently.

“And I’ll see you this Friday?” Seonghwa’s lip popped out of his mouth, red and spit slick.

Hongjoong nodded, “I wouldn’t miss it.”

“Okay, well, bye,” Seonghwa shuffled forward awkwardly and pulled Hongjoong into a stiff hug.

It felt so wrong for things to be so weird between them. Hongjoong looked over Seonghwa’s shoulder and saw the look of pity on Jongho’s face. He chose to end the hug and head towards the elevator without another word. He didn’t want some kid’s pity, and he didn’t want Seonghwa to feel forced to be performative with him.

**

Hongjoong did not spend the next two days thinking about Seonghwa. He refused to turn into a depressed neurotic mess over the other man looking at his phone. Even though he couldn’t prove it, Hongjoong knew Seonghwa had smiled at a text from another man. It was what it was, and there was nothing Hongjoong could do to change it.

It also didn’t change the fact that Seonghwa texted him later that night asking to meet two hours earlier than their normal time on Friday. It was an easy yes, and Hongjoong had spent his night looking for the perfect toy for their scene.

Now it was Friday, and he was going right from school to Seonghwa’s house, and he had no idea what was waiting for him, but he did know that Yeosang had been particularly giddy that week.

“Why are you so happy?” Hongjoong asked as they walked out of the school.

“Gym guy confessed.” Yeosang grinned. “It’s not like an official thing yet, but I like knowing that he’s interested in me.”

Hongjoong knocked their shoulders together, “that’s awesome Sangie. Congrats on getting your man.”

“I don’t have him yet, we are going to go on a date first. It’s so stupid though.” Yeosang frowned. “I think he was scared when he suggested it, but he asked and now I’m committed to it.”

“Just push through and get your man.” Hongjoong nodded as they made their way down the street to the subway station.

“That’s the plan.” Yeosang groaned. “And I’m horny. I want to climb him like a tree. I know he has a sleeper build, but he always has on joggers and long sleeved shirts. It’s insane. He wore shorts one day and I wanted to die. I feel like I’m in heat.”

“Oh, well that’s something that you just said.” Hongjoong laughed. “Wait till your second or third date to climb him.”

“No, I know.” Yeosang waved his hand as they descended into the subway station. “That’s what San said too. Wait why are you going my way?”

“Going to see Seonghwa early tonight.” Hongjoong breathed out.

“Is it weird with him?” Yeosang asked quietly. “I mean you seem fine, but you haven’t brought him up at all.”

“Just distancing myself and all that good stuff. I can’t have my mood be based off him all the time. It’s not healthy, and I was overthinking everything. I’m just going to take each day as it comes now.” Hongjoong answered honestly. He couldn’t have any more bad weeks because he was worried that Seonghwa was going to disappear.

“I still think you should come clean about your feelings.” Yeosang tapped his card down and looked at Hongjoong as he did the same. “Worst case is you lose him now not later.”

“Maybe next week, after we get through the scene tonight.” Hongjoong shrugged.

“Why can’t you do it tonight?” Yeosang looked at him seriously.

“I’m not ready for any of that. Plus, it’ll be easier on a Wednesday when we’re in a headspace for talking already.” Hongjoong turned away from Yeosang. “I need to go this way.”

“Okay, well, don’t beat yourself up,” Yeosang gave him two thumbs up. “You’re getting there.”

“I’ll confess on Wednesday.” Hongjoong swallowed and his stomach twisted at the idea. “I promise.”

“Amazing,” Yeosang gave him a big smile. “I’ll let you know how my date thing goes tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” Hongjoong yelled. “Bye!”

He made a face at himself. The urge to confess had started to claw at him, and Hongjoong was exhausted. It was time to come clean, and Wednesday would be the perfect time. He could explain his growing feelings and ask for a chance.

In a perfect fantasy world Seonghwa wouldn’t even have to say anything he’d just get on his knees. In a realistic world they’d agree to have a date. The worst case scenario would be Seonghwa letting him down gently, because that’s the kind of guy he was, and Hongjoong would go home and his search for a play partner would begin again.

There was no real way to know how Seonghwa felt. Sometimes there were glimpses of more. Hongjoong didn’t miss the way Seonghwa looked at him sometimes, that softness in his eyes that lingered too long, it seemed to reach deeper than just obedience or desire. There was more there, but it didn’t have to mean anything other than the admiration of a submissive for their Dominant.

The problem was, Hongjoong had nothing else to compare it to. He’d never had another submissive before, and he couldn’t compare Seonghwa to his past romantic partners even though that’s exactly what their relationship felt like.

It was worth it to just take the leap.

He’d do the scene tonight with a clean slate. He’d let himself dream and desire things that he only pushed down before. Yeosang was completely right, his worst case was something that was going to happen anyway. He had to give himself a chance. Maybe Seonghwa wouldn’t even think about it and just say yes, maybe Hongjoong would have to fight for him.

Hongjoong would do that, he would fight for Seonghwa, and he’d win. He was the best option for Seonghwa. No tall, rich, well-established man could compare to what Hongjoong could give him. Hongjoong already loved him, and Hongjoong loved all the parts of Seonghwa. Even when he was confusing like he was on Wednesday. Hongjoong still loved him.

Forty-five minutes later Hongjoong was at Seonghwa’s door, early. When he knocked, he was surprised that he had to wait longer than normal for the door to open. This time he didn’t panic, he knew that everything was going to be okay. Hongjoong knew that Seonghwa wasn’t hiding a man behind the door, he wasn’t going to end everything abruptly and leave Hongjoong alone and broken. No, Seonghwa was likely just nervous or still getting ready.

That was proven to be true when the door cracked open slightly, but not enough for Hongjoong to get in.

“I don’t want anyone to see me by mistake.” Seonghwa’s voice said through the crack.

“Step back then,” Hongjoong laughed lightly. “I want to be the only one that gets to see you anyway.”

There was some shuffling on the other side of the door before Seonghwa’s voice could be heard again. “Okay.”

Hongjoong walked in and shut the door behind him softly. He looked up, and his breath caught in his throat at the sight of Seonghwa. The top of his dress was a simple black corset with a sweetheart neckline. It clung to his body in a way that was infuriating. It had to have been another piece that Seonghwa had gotten custom made. The boning hugged every curve of his waist and ribs, lifting his chest just enough to make Hongjoong’s pulse spike. How did Seonghwa even have enough skin and fat there for his pecs to be lifted enough to look like cleavage?

Hongjoong was already hard.

The skirt was black with white ruffles, teasingly playful against the severe elegance of the corset. It was so short that Hongjoong had to curl his hands into fists at his sides to keep himself from moving. He hoped that when Seonghwa turned around, he’d catch a glimpse of the soft fluff of the rabbit tail plug that Hongjoong knew he was wearing.

But what really undid Hongjoong, what made his throat dry and his skin burn, were the details he hadn’t expected. Black fishnets stretched tight over Seonghwa’s long legs, each diamond cut into Seonghwa’s golden skin like they were just there to tempt Hongjoong into doing something vulgar. Seonghwa had even topped the look up with a pair of modest black heels, they weren’t too high, but they were just enough to arch his posture and make his legs look even longer.  

Hongjoong swallowed hard, almost audibly, his eyes traced upward again before he finally noticed the white rabbit ears that were nestled in Seonghwa’s platinum hair. The cuffs were also present, and it was then that Hongjoong noticed the collar in Seonghwa’s hand.

“I wanted you to put it on.” Seonghwa admitted as he held the collar up. “I know it’s silly, but it felt weird to do it myself. I know it doesn’t mean anything though, don’t worry about that.”

Hongjoong ached for it to mean something.

“I can’t believe someone saw you like this and didn’t like it,” Hongjoong’s eyes continued to drag over Seonghwa’s body. “Turn around so I can see your tail bunny. Then come and kneel while you take my shoes off. Then I’ll put your pretty collar on.”

Seonghwa’s ex-husband was the stupidest human to ever exist. How could anyone ever deny this? How could they deny Seonghwa one of his kinks, when it was so beautiful.

“Remind me of your safe words.” Hongjoong asked as Seonghwa turned.

Hongjoong’s eyes caught on the fluffy tail that poked out of the bottom of Seonghwa’s skirt. It was too low to be a realistic tail, but Hongjoong knew the object was nestled in Seonghwa’s tight ass, stretching him out for later.

“Green is good, yellow is slow down, red is stop,” Seonghwa started. “I pinch you if my mouth is full. I can also shake my head three times and make a no noise.”

“Good bunny.” Hongjoong smiled. “Now come take my shoes off and tell me what’s for dinner.”

“Too much,” Seonghwa laughed at himself. “I left work early to cook everything I could think of. You’ll have to take some home.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong’s jaw dropped as Seonghwa flawlessly knelt down even in his heels.

Was this a secret that Seonghwa had been keeping from him? Did Seonghwa also have a collection of heels hidden away? Hongjoong didn’t even care that their height difference was more pronounced. He already knew he wasn’t going to make it through dinner before he was buried deep in Seonghwa’s ass.

How could he wait?

“I made so much banchan because it’s so easy, and there’s going to be jeon too.” Seonghwa took a breath as he slipped Hongjoong’s first shoe off. “You need to eat the vegetables because I made them, and I’ll be sad if you don’t.” Seonghwa paused. “Sir.”

“I’ll eat them,” Hongjoong answered with a smile.

“Okay there’s also galbijjim, japchae, kimchi jjigae, and I made tuna kimbap because I know you like it.” Seonghwa nodded to himself and took off Hongjoong’s second shoe. “Oh and bossam.”

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong laughed as he reached out to touch his head. “That’s way too much.”

“I wanted to.” Seonghwa looked up at him with wide eyes.

“I know.” Hongjoong wanted to kiss him.

Then he remembered he could.

Hongjoong leaned down and placed a soft kiss on Seonghwa’s forehead, then the tip of his nose, then his plush lips. “Give me that collar.”

It was in his hand in seconds. Hongjoong hadn’t really ever understood the point of a collar. He never wanted to own anyone, but now, he truly understood. Right now, Seonghwa was his, and soon he’d always be his.

He slid the leather around Seonghwa’s neck and fastened the buckle. It was snug, just enough to be a reminder, but not enough to make it hard to breathe.

Seonghwa’s throat flexed beneath the band as he swallowed, and Hongjoong felt the movement against his fingers. His hand lingered there, thumb brushing lightly along the edge of the collar. He just wanted to feel Seonghwa’s pulse.

“Perfect,” Hongjoong murmured, his voice low. The word was more for himself than for Seonghwa, but he watched the submissive’s lashes lower and his lips part as if the praise hit him harder than it normally did.

Hongjoong leaned down again, close enough to let his breath ghost across Seonghwa’s ear. “You know what this means, don’t you?” His tone carried no sharp edge, just the quiet weight of his ownership.

This was dangerous territory when Seonghwa wasn’t his yet.

Seonghwa nodded once, slow and deliberate, but his body betrayed how he was really feeling. His shoulders rose in a shallow breath. His chest expanded under the tight line of the corset. His fingers twitched against his thighs like he didn’t know where to put them.

Hongjoong’s smile deepened. He pressed lightly on the collar with two fingers, and Seonghwa’s throat worked as he swallowed again, the line of his jaw tightening. His lashes fluttered but didn’t quite lift. Instead, Seonghwa tilted his head a fraction to the side, baring his throat further without thinking. The shift sent the faintest creak through the leather, the sound so subtle it made Hongjoong’s blood run hotter.

A shiver ran through Seonghwa, his knees flexing just enough that Hongjoong thought he might sink lower, not out of weakness, but in instinctive surrender.

They needed to stop before Hongjoong took him right there in the entryway.

Hongjoong cleared his throat. “Do you need to finish cooking?”

“Yes Sir.” Seonghwa eyes finally opened and Hongjoong found himself looking away. He needed to be careful, just because he was optimistic now didn’t mean that Seonghwa was going to reciprocate his feelings.

They could just be acting right now, both of them playing their parts a little too well. That thought lodged itself in Hongjoong’s mind as he watched Seonghwa kneel there so perfectly, chest rising and falling with controlled breaths, eyes soft with submission. Hongjoong swallowed hard. He knew should break the tension before it swallowed them whole. But he couldn’t. The silence settled around them, thick with everything unsaid.

Maybe Seonghwa was just good at playing his part. Maybe, Hongjoong was just too far gone to tell the difference.

“I have some work I need to do while you finish cooking.” Hongjoong stated plainly and nearly laughed when Seonghwa wiggled slightly.

“In the office is fine.” Seonghwa shifted on his knees. He wasn’t normally on the hardwood so long.

“Okay. I can set up in there, you go cook.” Hongjoong held out his hands to help Seonghwa get up.

Seonghwa grabbed his hands and tried to hide it when the plug shifted while he stood. Rather than make a face, Seonghwa’s entire demeanor went stiff and serious. Hongjoong decided to take pity on him and not tease him about the action. Seonghwa was already cooking in a plug, and he was about to eat in one as well. He didn’t need any teasing added on top of his torture.

Hongjoong waited a beat for Seonghwa to turn and go to the kitchen. It was then that he noticed a new fresh bouquet on the table it wasn’t the one he had given Seonghwa. His stomach lurched but there was no reason to assume the worst. Hongjoong knew that he needed to stop doing that. Even if they were from another man, Hongjoong was the man currently in Seonghwa’s home playing the part of his partner.

A few moments after Hongjoong settled at Seonghwa’s desk there was a light knock on the door. When he looked up Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile when he saw Seonghwa standing in an apron holding a whiskey glass.

“It’s a virgin mixed drink,” Seonghwa shifted. “I just wanted to give you something to start.”

Hongjoong nodded and gestured for Seonghwa to set the drink down. He watched Seonghwa closely and finally noticed how stiffly he was moving. Even now, as he moved towards Hongjoong, Seonghwa was struggling to breathe. There was no way he was that into the scene.

“Yellow.” Hongjoong stated flatly and Seonghwa froze. The liquid in the glass sloshed over the side and onto Seonghwa’s hand.

“Sir?” Seonghwa cocked his head to the side.

“You can’t breathe,” Hongjoong stood up.

“Oh, no no,” Seonghwa waved his hands. “I’m fine the corset is tight, but I like it. I promise I’m good, thank you for noticing but I’m okay.”

Hongjoong frowned.

“Really, I wouldn’t lie to you. I’ve never lied.” Seonghwa pleaded with big eyes. “Don’t make me change I’ve been looking forward to this scene. I’m so grateful that you’re into doing something that’s just domestic kink.”

“Can we at least loosen it a little?” Hongjoong sighed and sat back down.

“No.” Seonghwa firmly shook his head. “This is what I want. I can breathe.”

“Okay.” Hongjoong gave up. “If I notice you struggling again I’m going to stop until you take it off though. Understood?”

“Yes Sir.” Seonghwa nodded a few times. “Color?”

Hongjoong smiled, “green.”

“I hope you like your drink. Dinner is in about a half hour.” Seonghwa was out the door before Hongjoong could even properly thank him.

Exactly a half hour later Hongjoong’s drink was finished, and he had completed two days worth of lesson plans. He also reviewed what Yeosang had planned for them for the week ahead. He was able to be much more productive than he anticipated. His mind only drifted to what Seonghwa was doing in the kitchen every so often, but it didn’t linger there.

Something about the domestic scene made Hongjoong burn. Maybe someday this could be a weekly reality before they brought kids into the equation. Even then Seonghwa could cook for him, and Hongjoong would take care of him in the best ways that he knew how to.

“Sir?”

Hongjoong looked up from his computer, “yes?”

“Dinner is ready.” Seonghwa smiled.

“I’ll be right there. I just want to pack up first. I won’t have time to later.” Hongjoong explained as he shut his computer.

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa nodded before he nearly bounced out of the doorway.

Hongjoong let out a snort of air as a laugh before he packed up. He moved slowly but more for himself than anything else. This was a scene, and he needed to draw things out. It was already going to take all of his self control to make it through dinner. The least he could do was keep Seonghwa waiting now.

When he was done packing up Hongjoong walked out to the dining area and froze for just a second when he saw the large table. Every surface of it was covered in food. Plates and bowls were arranged neatly, and little details like garnishes and folded napkins showed the care that Seonghwa had put into the presentation

But, like always, it was Seonghwa that stole all of his attention. He stood at the side of the table with his arms tucked behind his back, shoulders were relaxed but his posture was proud, almost like he was presenting everything to Hongjoong, including himself. The soft light from the overhead fixture caught the curve of Seonghwa’s cheekbone, the faint shine in his hair, and the warmth in his expression that he wasn’t trying to hide.

“This feels like more than you said it was going to be.” Hongjoong said quietly.

Seonghwa gave a small nod. “I thought… of a few things you might like for leftovers.” His smile was a little tentative, but it was real.

Hongjoong’s chest clenched. Someday Seonghwa was going to give him a heart attack.

He had spent the whole day bracing himself for how hard this scene was going to be because of the domestic nature of it, but instead Seonghwa was standing here with their food laid out like a feast, waiting for him like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“You didn’t have to do that,” Hongjoong said, though his voice softened as he stepped closer.

“I wanted to,” Seonghwa admitted, finally lifting his eyes to meet Hongjoong’s.

That simple truth made Hongjoong’s thoughts spiral. This wasn’t about rules or scenes, or who was in charge. This was Seonghwa choosing to care for him in the quietest, most ordinary way, and that hit Hongjoong harder than anything else could.

“Then let’s sit,” Hongjoong said after a moment, his lips twitching into something between a smile and a sigh. “You should eat with me.”

Seonghwa’s arms finally came forward as he pulled a chair out for Hongjoong. The gesture was domestic, almost old-fashioned, and it made something warm bloom deep in Hongjoong’s chest as he sat down.

Hongjoong settled into the chair, and he noticed two things at once. There was only one place setting, and Seonghwa was lowering himself gracefully to the floor to kneel at Hongjoong’s side.

The movement was so natural, so deliberate, that it made Hongjoong’s brain go fuzzy. Seonghwa didn’t look at all out of place there; if anything, he looked like he belonged, his posture straight and his hands resting lightly in his lap.

“You’re not eating?” Hongjoong asked, his chopsticks hovering over the first plate he reached for.

Seonghwa shook his head slightly. “I want you to eat first.”

The simplicity of the answer made Hongjoong’s fuzzy brain snap back to attention. This wasn’t just play, and it didn’t feel like the scene that they had planned out. This was just Seonghwa lost in the quiet domesticity of dinner, still offering himself in ways that blurred the lines that they had set up weeks ago.

Hongjoong picked up a piece of food and forced himself to chew slowly, though the tension coiled low in his stomach. He glanced down, finding Seonghwa watching him with an expression that was both serene and expectant.

“You really should sit at the table,” Hongjoong stated softly. “You cooked all of this.”

Seonghwa tilted his head. “I wanted to sit here.”

Hongjoong swallowed, the bite of food turning thick in his throat. He reached down without thinking, brushing his fingers against Seonghwa’s hair in a quiet acknowledgment. Seonghwa leaned into the touch for a moment, and Hongjoong knew that he was exactly where he wanted to be.

Hongjoong tried to focus on his own plate, but his hand kept drifting down toward Seonghwa. It started small, he grabbed a piece of meat with his chopsticks, hesitated, then held it just in front of Seonghwa’s lips.

Seonghwa’s eyes flickered up at him, questioning but obedient. He leaned forward slightly, lips parting to take the bite. His mouth closed neatly around the food, his gaze never leaving Hongjoong’s.

“Green?” Hongjoong asked, his own voice softer than he intended.

Seonghwa chewed, swallowed, and nodded. “Green. This is making me feel fuzzy.”

Hongjoong’s head was a mess. He wanted to give this to Seonghwa all of the time, but he’d settle for giving it to him for right now. It didn’t matter anyway, once he started feeding Seonghwa he couldn’t stop. First there was a piece of vegetable, then a bite of fish, then a chunk of jeon. It all slipped between Seonghwa’s lips, though each time it was accompanied by an open gaze that almost made Hongjoong lose his appetite.

Seonghwa didn’t reach for anything himself. He just knelt there, letting Hongjoong decide what he ate and when. It should have only felt like a scene, something that they had already planned, something structured and deliberate. Instead, it felt natural, as if this had always been part of their routine.

Between bites for Seonghwa, Hongjoong remembered that he needed to eat as well, though each mouthful felt silly and inadequate compared to the quiet intimacy of feeding the man at his side.

Hongjoong glanced down at Seonghwa again, chopsticks paused midair. For a brief, dangerous moment, it didn’t feel like Dominant and submissive. It didn’t even feel like friends. It felt like something far simpler and far more terrifying, it felt like home.

Maybe he would confess after the scene. Why delay it? They were so perfect together in this moment that it was an easy conclusion to reach. Hongjoong would finish the scene, then he would confess his feelings and ask for a chance.

Then the flowers in the middle of the table caught his attention and Hongjoong lost all of his courage to confess. Instead, something sharp and possessive curled in his chest. He looked down at Seonghwa, who was still kneeling patiently at his side, lips parted slightly as if he was waiting for the next bite. Seonghwa was his.

“Everything was delicious.” Hongjoong pushed his chair back and stood. “I think I’m ready for dessert though.”

“I’ll just go get it Sir.” Seonghwa wobbled to a standing position.

“No.” Hongjoong did something completely impulsive and bent forward, shoving all the plates further up the table.

The ceramic plates and bowls clattered against each other as they slid against wood of the table. The food shifted dangerously but nothing hit the table and none of the serving dishes hit the floor.

“What are you doing?” Seonghwa asked, his voice low, careful.

Hongjoong didn’t answer right away. He leaned back away from the table, and looked over Seonghwa’s body until his eyes locked onto the other man’s face. “Making room.” His tone was tight.

“For what?” Seonghwa asked though Hongjoong suspected he already knew.

“Dessert,” Hongjoong said simply. “Bend over the table.”

Seonghwa’s breath caught, and for a moment he didn’t move. It was a long enough pause that Hongjoong was ready to check in. The word color was on his lips when Seonghwa finally moved. He bent over the clear spot on the table and spread his legs.

Hongjoong was going to cum in his pants. He thought of the carrot shaped dildo in his bag and how it was going to go completely unused because he couldn’t control himself. With little finesse, but still excruciatingly slow Hongjoong pulled the plug out of Seonghwa. His hole clung to the plastic of the plug and stretched tight around it as Hongjoong pulled. When Seonghwa’s body finally let go of the plug Hongjoong tossed it onto the floor and watched as a trail of slick lube leaked out of Seonghwa’s hole.

No, Hongjoong wasn’t even going to pretend like he was going to have self-control tonight. He managed to manhandle Seonghwa onto his back on the table. Somehow, they still hadn’t moved a single dish.

Hongjoong undid the buttons on his shirt quickly but clumsily and ended up ripping the bottom three open before he shrugged off his dress shirt and pulled off the white undershirt he had on. His pants were barely open before he was between Seonghwa’s legs. It wasn’t needed but he reached down to rip a hole in Seonghwa’s fishnets.

“Sir.” Seonghwa moaned and arched. A plate by his head clanked against the flowers and Hongjoong was forced to remember what made him see red in the first place.

Hongjoong stayed silent, but he did move. He pressed his cock to Seonghwa’s hole and pushed in without warning. Seonghwa cried out and the first dish hit the floor when Hongjoong started to move. His pace was brutal, but he wanted them both to cum. There was no need to be soft or romantic. This was simply him laying his claim.

Seonghwa would think about Hongjoong even if he did let this other guy fuck him. Hongjoong was going to lodge himself in the back of Seonghwa’s brain so that no one else could give him everything he wanted. So that no other cock filled him as good. Seonghwa was his.

“Sir, Sir, Sir,” Seonghwa chanted as he let go and just bounced on Hongjoong’s cock.

Hongjoong watched amused as Seonghwa’s arms flew out to the sides. They connected with a few of the plates, and another one slipped off the table. It didn’t matter though, both of Seonghwa’s arms were covered in the food anyway. A few more plates were also so very close to falling off the table.

“Sir please.” Seonghwa wrapped his legs around Hongjoong’s body.

Hongjoong leaned over Seonghwa and put his hands on the table. One landed in the dish that held the spinach banchan but he didn’t even flinch. Hongjoong just pushed it to the side, crashing it against another plate, before he used the solid wood of the table for more leverage.

The heels of Seonghwa’s shoes dug into his back but Hongjoong leaned into the feeling. He could be a little masochistic too when he wanted to be. This time he wanted to have some lasting marks from Seonghwa.

“Sir I’m.” Seonghwa squirmed. “Fuck I can’t. Please Sir let me.”

“Let go.” Hongjoong nodded.

Seonghwa came seconds later inside his pretty skirt, completely untouched.

Hongjoong couldn’t take the sensation of Seonghwa clenching around him and came moments later. He wished he hadn’t thrown the plug onto the floor so that he could have plugged Seonghwa back up. If only he could cum in Seonghwa before one of his dates and plug him up so that he had a reminder of Hongjoong the entire time.

“Fuck.” Hongjoong breathed out.

“Sir?” Seonghwa shifted forward on Hongjoong’s cock and let out a content sigh.

“I got a carrot toy and we didn’t even get to use it. I was going to make you ride me.” Hongjoong punctuated the statement with a breathy laugh. He pulled out after and took off Seonghwa’s heels before he helped him to his feet.

“That was a lot,” Seonghwa looked at the damage.

Only one plate was broken, but the carpet under the table might have been ruined by all the food that fell on it.

“I’ll replace the carpet.” Hongjoong cringed and his eyes went to the flowers again.

Seonghwa caught him looking at the bouquet and a frown appeared on his pretty face.

“I left yours at work.” Seonghwa started. “Those were delivered here.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Hongjoong shrugged.

This didn’t change anything, he’d still confess on Wednesday. Flowers didn’t have to mean something.

“Everything has felt so weird between us this week.” Seonghwa shook his head. “Help me get the corset off please.”

Hongjoong moved obediently behind Seonghwa, and started to pull on the laces to undo them. “I’m sorry. I’ve been really in my head, I didn’t mean to make anything weird. I shouldn’t have gotten you anything extravagant just because you treated everyone.”

“I was weird too. You don’t have to apologize. I love your gift, and I love your flowers.” Seonghwa sighed. “You’re lucky I already put food aside from you.”

And that was that.

Hongjoong wanted to laugh. They were so close to having a meaningful conversation, but Hongjoong was too scared to push. He didn’t want to know if Seonghwa had a good date or not, he didn’t want to know if he was about to be left. Right now, he only wanted to think about how he was going to get the courage to confess.

“Honestly, I don’t think I’m up for much more tonight.” Seonghwa said but he wouldn’t look at Hongjoong.

“What?” Hongjoong frowned.

“I mean, I can give you anything you need for aftercare. If you feel like you might drop or something.” Seonghwa waved his hands. “But I kind of just want to clean up and sleep.”

What was happening? They had just fucked like animals on the dining room table and Seonghwa wanted him gone? Anxiety crept into Hongjoong’s brain. He should just confess now. It was weird anyway.

“We can just try again on Wednesday,” Seonghwa nodded firmly.

Hongjoong looked at the flowers on the table. Was Wednesday even going to happen?

“Whatever you want.” Hongjoong said lamely.

“You know all this is about what you want too.” Seonghwa’s hands went to his hips.

Hongjoong laughed and gestured to what Seonghwa was wearing. He refused to let things get worse between them. Seonghwa had been off and moody for both of their meetings that week, and then sweetly apologetic. Even this time he completely deflated when Hongjoong pointed out who had planned the scene.

“I’m sorry. I’m just, I don’t even know.” Seonghwa shook his head. “I’m going to shower. There are two bags in the kitchen for you. I’ll take care of everything else. Even the mess. I liked what we did, maybe too much during parts of it, but right now I want to be alone.”

“What do you mean too much?” Hongjoong frowned.

“That scene was a life I can’t have.” Seonghwa sighed. “It was too easy to pretend like it was real.”

“It was real.” Hongjoong countered as he pulled his pants up. This wasn’t a conversation that they should be having with his dick out.

“No. It wasn’t.” Seonghwa said firmly. “We aren’t together, and that’s not something another person can give me.”

Hongjoong’s chest swelled with pride as he focused on the last part of the sentence to bypass the pain caused by the first.

“Then why…” Hongjoong breathed out. He couldn’t confess when Seonghwa was feeling weird. He didn’t want to come off as manipulative or forceful. “I’ll get the food and leave.”

Seonghwa nodded, “I’m going to shower. You can let yourself out, the door will lock behind you.”

“Okay.” Hongjoong raised his hand. “Bye. I guess I’ll see you Wednesday.”

“You will.” Seonghwa nodded firmly. “No matter what.”

Hongjoong froze as Seonghwa turned and nearly ran to the bathroom. What did that mean? Hongjoong wanted to scream, he wanted to run after Seonghwa and demand an answer. He was supposed to know if Seonghwa was going out on a serious date. There was no way he could be that far along with someone.

Everything would be fine on Wednesday.

**

Hongjoong woke up on Saturday with a headache and decided that staying in bed all weekend was going to be his best option for selfcare. He was still going to confess on Wednesday it didn’t matter that it looked like another man was finally stepping up and giving Seonghwa the attention that he deserved. His flowers were better anyway.

At around three Hongjoong finally looked at his phone. There were no messages from Seonghwa, not that he expected anything, but he did have a string of messages and one missed call from Wooyoung. Hongjoong wanted to ignore the messages in favor of rotting in his bed, but to hear from Wooyoung on a Saturday was rare.

The phone rang twice before Wooyoung picked up.

“Hey.”

“Hi.” Hongjoong answered weakly.

“Come over?” Wooyoung offered.

“It’s a Saturday, and I’m not feeling very sexy.” Hongjoong answered flatly.

“Not for that. Don’t be an idiot.” Wooyoung signed on the other end of the phone. “Did you even listen to the voicemail I left you?”

“No.” Hongjoong didn’t want to leave his bed never mind the house.

“Come over for dinner.” Wooyoung breathed out a puff of air. “I have a plan.”

“I don’t want a plan. I want to rot in bed.” Hongjoong rolled out of his blankets and nearly fell onto the floor when he tried to stand. “It’s the weekend.”

“And I think you should come over for your mental health.” Wooyoung pushed. “We don’t even have to talk about anything scene or Seonghwa related. Just hang out.”

“Are you really going to still want to be friends when Seonghwa leaves me?” Hongjoong couldn’t hold the question in anymore.

“Yes, but that’s not really a phone conversation, is it?” Wooyoung sighed. “Listen I think I know why you’re feeling so bad, and I’m trying to help. Come over.”

Hongjoong shook his hair out and ruffled it with his hand. “Fine.”

“Come over now. We eat early because of the girls and we can talk about whatever you want or not at all.” Wooyoung offered.

“Fine. I’ll see you soon.”

He tugged on a sweatshirt that still smelled faintly like detergent and something warm he couldn’t place. It was Seonghwa’s. Hongjoong paused before he pulled it back off and replaced it with one of his own. It smelled a little more familiar but was far less comforting.

Hongjoong’s reflection in the mirror by the door wasn’t reassuring. His hair was sticking up, eyes shadowed, and there was a faint pinch in his expression that gave away how little he’d been sleeping.

He braced a hand on the doorknob and stilled, listening. The sound of the TV in the living room traveled through the wood. Then a laugh, low, easy, Yunho, and Mingi’s deeper voice overlapping. Of course they were both there.

Hongjoong shut his eyes. The last thing he needed was Mingi’s bluntness or Yunho’s quiet, knowing looks. He could already hear the question before it was even asked, have you told him yet? He didn’t want to answer it.

He was going to do it on Wednesday, it was a horrific countdown. Wednesday he would put it all on the table, and Thursday he would be without a submissive, without Seonghwa, without whatever fragile thing they’d built between them.

His throat went tight. He wasn’t sure if he was walking toward an ending or just the inevitable crash after weeks of pretending that he could separate sex and love.

He opened the door.

“I don’t want to talk.” Hongjoong held up his hand. “I’m fine, I’m going out but I’m fine.”

“You look like shit.” Mingi commented.

“I’ve been sleeping bad, but I’m fine.” Hongjoong rushed to say. “I promise. I just need more sleep.”

“I think you slept too much.” Yunho stated.

He hadn’t really slept, not in a real way that left him rested. The whole night had been a blur of half-dreams and shallow dozing, his body never sinking deep enough to really be asleep. Every time he turned over, the sheets felt wrong. They were too hot, then too cold, then too twisted around his legs.

Hongjoong’s brain wouldn’t shut off either. It circled endlessly, replaying Seonghwa’s laugh, the curve of his mouth, the ghost of his hands, until all of it tangled with a sinking feeling in his chest. By two in the morning, he was curled around himself, wishing more than anything that he could switch it all off, just sleep until after Wednesday, skip past the edge he was heading toward.

When Hongjoong finally drifted off again, it was still shallow. He dreamed of conversations that never happened, of Seonghwa turning away before Hongjoong could finish his sentence. Each time he startled awake only to fall back asleep and right into the same cycle.

“I just didn’t sleep well.” Hongjoong countered as he struggled with his shoes. “Anyway, I need to go.”

“Can we eat the food you brought home last night?” Mingi questioned.

“Yeah, eat all of it please I don’t want to see it.” Hongjoong shook his head. “It’s good. I just don’t want to think about it.”

“Did you have sex on the food or something?” Mingi made a face.

Not that food.

“No.” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’ll be back late, I think. I don’t know.”

“Stay safe.” Yunho called out after him.

Hongjoong walked as quickly as he could to the subway station that he needed to be at. This time he wasn’t even going to try and be a good guest. They didn’t need anything. They had a house full of warmth and love. What could he ever offer other than a sour expression? He didn’t even know why he was fighting a crowd on the train to go over to their area of the city.

Maybe he should take Wooyoung up on the almost offer to hook up with them. Yeosang seemed over it and Seonghwa, well, he didn’t matter. There really wasn’t another option for him to move on. Maybe he’d just stay alone, or maybe someday he’d settle for someone that was just good enough like it seemed like Seonghwa was determined to.

“Don’t say it.” Hongjoong held his hand up when San opened the door.

“I won’t.” San pulled him into a quick hug, and it was all Hongjoong could do to not melt into it.

Maybe the lack of aftercare had gotten to him more than he thought.

“Do you want a baby? They help.” San smiled.

“Yes.” Hongjoong nodded firmly. “Where are they?”

“Both?” San feigned surprise.

“Both.” Hongjoong nodded again as he kicked his shoes off.

“They’re playing with Wooyoung in the living room.” San nodded behind him. “I’m sure he could use some back up.”

“Why isn’t Seonghwa here watching them?” Hongjoong did his best to come off as conversational, but he knew his tone was tinged with jealously and maybe resentment.

San took a deep breath. “I think you can guess.”

“Oh, so he’s already abandoning everyone for some guy. Cool.” Hongjoong grumbled.

“He’s not,” San shook his head. “The guy had something they could only do today planned. It’s not that serious. Did he do something last night?”

Hongjoong shook his head, “no. Not really. Kind of kicked me out after. I guess he got what he wanted.”

“Hey.” San’s tone was firm. “That’s still my friend even if he’s being a little weird right now.”

“Sorry,” Hongjoong waved his hand. “I know. I get it. I’m sorry.”

“You’re my friend too.” San continued. “I don’t like seeing you upset. I like it less when Seonghwa’s been erratic and I know you’re upset because of him.”

“Seonghwa is an adult. I’m sure he can handle himself.” Hongjoong shrugged. “I’m off to find the girls.”

Hongjoong walked away and out of the conversation. He entered the living room and Wooyoung and the girls paused what they were doing to look at him with matching wide eyes.

“Jooongg.” Seoha pointed and nodded before she looked at Wooyoung.

“That’s right Hongjoong.” Wooyoung smiled.

Seoha nodded before she pulled herself up from her sitting position and toddled unevenly to Hongjoong’s feet. She didn’t say a word she just lifted her hands up and waited for him to make a move. Hongjoong smiled at her brightly as he lifted her up and sat her on his hip.

“Nap nap.” She said as she gently patted his hair.

“Even a baby is calling me out.” Hongjoong sighed.

“It’s because she’s so smart.” Wooyoung shrugged. “Are you going to be smart?”

“Wednesday.” Hongjoong shrugged. “I don’t want to talk about it. You said we didn’t have to.”

“Okay. We won’t.” Wooyoung gave in right away.

Hongjoong shifted Seoha and made his way over to sit on the floor with Wooyoung and Isol. Seoha didn’t leave his side as they stacked small brightly colored blocks and then knocked them down. He couldn’t help but get lost in what they were doing as he tried to instruct them into making slightly harder towers each time, forcing them to think about balance as the blocks fell on their own.

“JOONGIE.” Isol screeched and pointed at her tower.

“Wow.” Hongjoong made his features go wide and when he looked up, he realized Wooyoung was nowhere to be found. How long had he been playing with the girls?

Then without warning he had two little hands on his face squishing his cheeks together. Isol giggled at what she was doing and soon Seoha joined in the giggles. If he could move his face with Isol holding his cheeks together Hongjoong would have been smiling. Hongjoong made a few silly noises though his pursed lips and both girls fell into shrieking giggles each time he did it. When his face started to hurt he reached out his hands and tickled each of the twins. They fell to the ground in a mess of joyful noise.

A throat cleared.

Hongjoong looked up and was shocked to see Seonghwa standing there with glassy looking eyes. Hongjoong had seen him cry enough to know that he was on the verge of tears. How long had Seonghwa been there watching? Why was he even there?

“Wooyoung wanted me to get you for dinner.” Seonghwa stated simply.

“Oh.” Hongjoong stood up. “Sure. Are you staying? I can go if you want. It sounded like you wanted space.”

“I don’t want space.” Seonghwa stated firmly. “Not from you.”

“After last night that’s confusing.” Hongjoong stood. “Anyway, we shouldn’t talk like this in front of the girls.”

“Yeah.” Seonghwa looked away and rubbed at his eyes.

Hongjoong pretended to ignore the action.

“Here take one.” Hongjoong picked up and held out Isol to Seonghwa.

“Hwa Hwa.” She mumbled and patted his cheek sweetly.

“Hi baby girl.” Seonghwa gave her check a peck. “Hi Seoha.”

“Hwa!” Seoha chirped as Hongjoong picked her up.

“It’s time for dinner.” Seonghwa smiled sweetly between them. “There’s lots of yummy food that Appa made.”

“Appa!” Isol screeched.

Hongjoong flinched but smiled anyway. It was sweet how much they loved their fathers.

“Have you slept?” Seonghwa asked Hongjoong.

“Joong nap nap.” Seoha added in.

“I did not nap.” Hongjoong laughed lightly. “And no, I didn’t sleep well. I don’t always.”

“I know.” Seonghwa nodded. “I remember you saying that before.”

“Just fun me things.” Hongjoong shrugged as they came around the corner to the kitchen.

Wooyoung looked up and looked between Hongjoong and Seonghwa closely. It was obvious that he wanted to say something, but Hongjoong stood hoping that for once, someone would keep their mouth shut when he wanted them to.

If anything, he felt like he deserved an explanation as to why Seonghwa was there, after his date. Seonghwa had never dressed that well for Hongjoong. The Seonghwa he knew was always dressed in work suits, flowing pants, or pretty lingerie sets.

“I’m going to change.” Seonghwa said after he set the baby in her highchair.

Hongjoong ignored him in favor of setting down the child he was holding, he wasn’t even sure if anyone acknowledged Seonghwa.

“This feels very intentional.” Hongjoong commented.

“It is.” Wooyoung grinned. “We’re team Hongjoong.”

Hongjoong rolled his eyes. “There aren’t any teams here. It’s just us all wanting a happy Seonghwa.”

“Happy Hwa.” Seoha smiled.

“That’s right we always want a happy Seonghwa.” San said to her in a sweet voice. “And a happy Hongjoong.”

Seoha looked at Hongjoong and nodded. “Yeah! All happy.”

It wasn’t long before Seonghwa appeared again this time in an oversized grey hoodie and long matching shorts that were down past his knees. He looked like he was made to be cuddled and Hongjoong wanted to take him to bed. Not for anything sexual, no, Hongjoong wanted to wrap himself around the other man until he finally fell asleep.

Hongjoong sat at the table with a fake smile on his face as Seoha shrieked in delight when San finally set a spoonful of mashed sweet potato in front of her. Isol, not to be ignored, clapped her hands together until Wooyoung leaned down to kiss the top of her head.

It should have been comforting to be surrounded by this level of domestic chaos. But Hongjoong’s gaze kept slipping sideways away from the girls and his friends. Seonghwa ended up sitting across from him, calm as ever, a soft expression tugging at his mouth as he offered a spoonful of sweet potato to Isol while her fathers were busy getting the adults food ready.

Hongjoong’s head started to pound. He wanted to know who Seonghwa had been out with and how the date had gone. Was there going to be another one? They were clearly already on date two or three and Hongjoong knew that was close to Seonghwa’s what are we conversation.

Rather than asking Seonghwa about the date, Hongjoong reached for the bowl of rice and filled his plate with more than he planned to eat, nodding along as Wooyoung launched into a story about how Seoha had figured out how to throw her pacifier halfway across the living room.

Seonghwa laughed, low and warm, and the sound went through Hongjoong like lightening. He looked down quickly, forcing himself to focus on his chopsticks. If he wasn’t careful, someone would notice. Not that he had much to hide. Everyone in that room had to know how he felt by now. Even the girls.

“How was the date?” Wooyoung asked as he plopped some rice onto the twin’s plates.

Hongjoong scowled at him, but he was secretly pleased that someone had asked.

“Okay.” Seonghwa shrugged. “He wanted to hang out more, but I wanted to be here. I guess we’re hanging out on Tuesday though.”

“Interesting.” San nodded. “So, he’s just average?”

“Sannie.” Wooyoung laughed. “I’m sure if Seonghwa picked him to go out with he has to be more than average in several categories. Right Seonghwa?”

Seonghwa cleared his throat. “He’s fine. We went to the botanical garden, and he compared me to the flowers.”

Hongjoong couldn’t help the snort that left him. All three adults looked at him.

“Feels lazy but whatever,” Hongjoong shrugged.

“Oh? Then what would you compare me to?” Seonghwa challenged with a smirk.

“The moon,” Hongjoong said. The words slipped out before he even knew that he was talking.

Silence fell around the table.

Wooyoung froze, halfway through feeding Seoha another spoonful of mashed vegetables, but didn’t dare interrupt. San glanced at Hongjoong and then to Seonghwa nervously.

Hongjoong didn’t care. He couldn’t stop himself. He swallowed hard and went on.

“Yeah, you’re the moon to me,” Hongjoong said quietly, his voice steadier than he felt. “Beautiful in a way that makes it hard to breathe, constant in a way that grounds me, and untouchable enough that it hurts. Flowers fade, but the moon,” he paused, his eyes locking with Seonghwa’s, “the moon is forever.”

Across the table, Seonghwa went still. His chopsticks hovered above his bowl like he’d forgotten what he was about to do with them. His lips parted, but nothing came out. His gaze almost hurt.

Hongjoong wanted to laugh it off, but the way Seonghwa was looking at him made it impossible. So, he just shrugged, and tried to be casual, and reached for his drink. “It’s a little less lazy than flowers, don’t you think?”

Seonghwa set his chopsticks down slowly. He didn’t smile. He didn’t tease. He just sat there, quiet, and thoughtful. “I always liked the quote ‘Let the moon teach you the art of being beautiful and lonely at the same time’.”

Hongjoong nodded and realized all that had happened in front of his friends and their children. He might as well confess right there at the dinner table.

“You two should hang out with us after dinner, once the girls are in bed.” San commented. “We can have a fire in the backyard.”

Wooyoung nodded. “It’s a good night for it.”

“Okay.” Seonghwa nodded, his eyes still locked onto Hongjoong.

“Sounds good.” Hongjoong

After that the dinner continued uneventfully.

The twins babbled and gurgled in their highchairs, and the conversations started and ended by Wooyoung and San filled the space like a background track. Hongjoong nibbled on his food, eyes drifting to Seonghwa every so often. He was quietly eating across from him, focused on his own plate. Occasionally, Seonghwa would reach over to feed a spoonful to one of the girls, and Hongjoong would glance away.

“The firepit is already stocked with wood. Hongjoong can you lite it while Seonghwa and San start to clean up?” Wooyoung asked as he picked Seoha up and then Isol.

Hongjoong looked at him carrying the two babies. “Do you want help?”

“No.” Wooyoung shook his head. “They just need to be cleaned up and changed.”

“Oh, okay.” Hongjoong stood and looked to San and Seonghwa briefly before he sighed and turned to head outside.

Once outside he realized that he had been given no further instructions, but everything he needed was neatly lined up on the edge of the stone firepit. There wasn’t a lot of room in the yard, even less with the swing set for the girls, but there was just enough for the fire to not be a complete hazard.

Hongjoong crouched down and stuck little bundles of tinder that he pulled from a bag into the stacked wood. Once he felt like he had enough he methodically lit each one and hoped for the best. He had never actually made a fire before, but he had seen it done. This seemed like more of a task for Yunho than him. Hongjoong was a city boy, and most outdoors related things were not in his skill set.

By the time San and Seonghwa came out, drinks in hand, the fire was burning evenly.

“That’s a surprise.” San commented on the fire.

“Rude.” Hongjoong frowned. “Your husband nominated me to do it.”

“That doesn’t mean he thought you could.” San smiled. “It means he thought he could tease you if it didn’t go well.”

Hongjoong let out a groan before he sat down in one of the four chairs that were positioned in a semi-circle around the fire. He was on one end and Seonghwa wordlessly chose the chair next to him. Hongjoong was surprised that he didn’t pick the furthest one.

Before Hongjoong could defend himself Wooyoung appeared balancing two drinks, and a baby monitor.

“Oh, you actually lit it,” Wooyoung handed a drink over to Hongjoong and set the monitor on the ground between him and San before he sat.

“You guys are worse than my other friends.” Hongjoong grumbled.

“He admitted we’re his friends.” San held his cup out to Wooyoung and then Seonghwa for a cheers.

Hongjoong groaned and sipped his drink. He didn’t know if he was in the mood to be teased all night.

“So really, how is this guy you’ve been seeing?” Wooyoung asked Seonghwa.

Hongjoong needed to leave.

“Good I guess.” Seonghwa squirmed in his seat a little. “He’s nice. He seems like the kind of guy that wouldn’t leave in the morning without saying anything. You know? He seems affectionate after sex too, like he’d be okay with kissing and cuddling when asked to do it.”

Hongjoong’s blood went cold. Seonghwa had spent the week angry over how their scene on Sunday had ended? Was he pushing dates with some guy because Hongjoong fell alseep, and then didn’t dare to wake up Seonghwa on Monday morning?

“I texted,” Hongjoong grumbled just low enough that only Seonghwa could hear.

Seonghwa looked over and frowned, “well that wasn’t enough after all the stuff we did.”

“How was I supposed to know that?” Hongjoong was a little louder. “You just looked peaceful, and I didn’t want to ruin that.”

“Breakfast exists as a meal Hongjoong,” Seonghwa crossed his arms. “You could have stayed.”

“I woke up at three am, we both had work,” Hongjoong shifted his cup, almost spilling the liquid. “Where was I even supposed to get food, or clothes for work?”

“My fridge is full of food.” Seonghwa uncrossed his arms and then crossed his legs before he took a long sip of his drink. “And you have Yeosang, you could have been late for school while you got a change of clothes.”

What was happening?

Hongjoong had woken up at three in the morning the day after Seonghwa demanded they sleep together. He blinked into the darkness before he realized where he was, he didn’t even remember falling asleep.

Everything was so quiet except the faint sound of Seonghwa’s heavy breathing beside him.

He should have woken them both up right away, they had work in a few hours, but Seonghwa looked too peaceful to disturb. His face was turned towards Hongjoong, lips parted, hair all over his pillow and his face. The sight made something inside of Hongjoong break.

He stayed there, memorizing the lines of Seonghwa’s sleeping face before he leaned forward and brushed the hair from Seonghwa’s forehead before he pressed a slow, quiet kiss there. Seonghwa didn’t move, didn’t wake up, he only sighed and settled deeper into his blankets.

Hongjoong pulled away reluctantly, got dressed in the dark, and sent Seonghwa a short text before he left.

There wasn’t anything to be mad about. Hongjoong just didn’t want to wake him up.

“I’ve never been in that situation before and didn’t know what to do. You need to tell me if you’re mad at me, not take it out on me all week long.” Hongjoong’s eyes narrowed.

“You didn’t do anything wrong.” Seonghwa sighed and relaxed his body. “Don’t listen to me.”

Hongjoong looked over at Wooyoung, who seemed to be very amused by the exchange, and then to San, who to his credit looked concerned.

“So, you guys are kissing?” Wooyoung commented likely as a poor attempt to break the tension.

“As aftercare or whatever.” Seonghwa spat out and then sighed at himself.

Wooyoung let out a loud laugh and San shoved him. Hongjoong watched as they had a silent conversation with lots of aggressive eye contact. He turned his gaze to Seonghwa who was already looking at him.

“I’m sorry I read the situation wrong, and I hardly remember you asking for anything else. I was so tired.” Hongjoong breathed and leaned in so that the other couple couldn’t hear him. “You know I’ll always give you everything you need.”

“I thought the legos were an apology and I don’t like to feel like I’m being bought.” Seonghwa stated simply.

“No that was just panic,” Hongjoong laughed at himself. “I didn’t know what to do when I saw all the stuff you had delivered to my office.”

“It wasn’t even all for you.” Seonghwa laughed. “Apology accepted by the way.”

“Thank you.” Hongjoong dipped his head so that he didn’t kiss Seonghwa.

“Look at that healthy communication,” San commented. His cheeks were already pink.

“We love to see it.” Wooyoung took a sip of his drink. “Just so you know they’re both light weights.” Wooyoung spoke to Hongjoong. “I try and limit their alcohol.”

Hongjoong nodded, “I guess someone needs to be mostly sober for the girls too.”

“Here’s to responsibility,” San held his glass up to the fire and finished off his drink.

“It will not be San.” Wooyoung laughed before he leaned over and gave San’s cheek a quick kiss.

“So, Seonghwa,” San started. “How is Hongjoong coming along as a Dom? Is he learning?”

Hongjoong’s face tightened in shock, but Seonghwa’s relaxed into a pleased expression. He wanted to know the answer, but he figured it would be a more private conversation.

“He’s very natural.” Seonghwa answered diplomatically and Hongjoong thought he was going to stop talking there but he didn’t. “I forget how young he is all of the time, and it never feels like he’s inexperienced. I don’t always know what he’s thinking or if he’s panicked but after last weekend, I think he could handle any request from any submissive.”

Right, any submissive, because it wasn’t going to just be Seonghwa.

“It’s because of my amazing advice and recommendations.” Wooyoung cut in. “Obviously.”

“No.” Seonghwa shook his head firmly. “He’s just that good.”

Something warm spread through Hongjoong’s body. It could have been the drink he was lightly sipping but just knowing that Seonghwa thought he was doing a good job was enough for him.

“Don’t listen to his compliments.” Wooyoung looked at Hongjoong. “You two just have good chemistry.”

“Okay.” Hongjoong clapped his hands together. “How did you two get together?”

“Oh god no.” Seonghwa groaned.

Wooyoung shifted to sit up straighter and a silly smile spread across San’s face.

“He was dating a girl.” Wooyoung started.

“I’ve dated girls,” Hongjoong made a face.

“Of course you have.” Wooyoung rolled his eyes. “Anyway, he didn’t even know he liked men. Can you imagine that? My out and proud husband not knowing he likes dick?”

“Why did you ask?” Seonghwa groaned.

“This story is feeling a little biphobic but okay.” Hongjoong laughed.

“Then,” Wooyoung continued like Hongjoong and Seonghwa hadn’t spoken. “He’d only talk about Seonghwa, but that’s how I knew he liked men and he just didn’t know it yet.”

“But how did you meet?” Hongjoong laughed.

“Economics, all three of us had the class together.” Seonghwa explained. “Wooyoung and I were friends, and Wooyoung literally saw San and said that twink is going to be my husband.”

“And he is.” Wooyoung nodded and finished off his drink with a smug look on his face.

“It just took me awhile.” San shrugged. “And Seonghwa is pretty so that helped me realize that I also like men. Wooyoung can be a lot at first.”

Seonghwa rolled his eyes dramatically. “It took Wooyoung two agonizing months to get San to agree to a date. Literally the worst two months of my entire life. Wooyoung would complain about San, and then San would hang out with us and hit on me without even knowing he was doing it. Of course, I couldn’t do anything about it anyway because Wooyoung had already made up his mind.”

“He was so scrawny and cute back then too.” Wooyoung cooed.

“The best relationships start off with miscommunication. If you’re not a little scared of your feelings are you even doing it right?” San laughed.

Hongjoong choked on his drink.

“From the first date they were just in love and like this.” Seonghwa gestured to the couple. “They’ve always been disgusting.”

“Meanwhile, Seonghwa’s ex found him at a party junior year, after he was already graduated. Which is insanely creepy, but Seonghwa had heart eyes for the sexy older man.” Wooyoung laughed.

“And now we’re divorced.” Seonghwa crossed his arms again. “So, I guess that story doesn’t matter.”

“But your type is still dilfs.” San laughed.

That was not Hongjoong. His fear that Seonghwa was looking for someone older and wildly successful had finally come true.

“Well neither of you are dilfs so I guess it’s just a state of mind.” Seonghwa sighed heavily.

Wooyoung rolled his eyes dramatically. “What about you Hongjoong? We don’t know anything about your exs so we can’t tease you.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong shifted. “I don’t know. My dating history is a lot of bad choices and pining. I don’t even think I was ever with anyone more than a year. Nothing has really ever clicked fully.”

“I bet you’re a heartbreaker and you have no idea.” Seonghwa commented.

Hongjoong wanted to analyze that statement but he didn’t get a chance to.

“Oh, I can see that.” San excitedly sat up straighter. “The kind of guy to just realize it’s not going to work one day and then he drops them without a heads up.”

“That’s never happened.” Hongjoong grumbled. “I like communication, and I don’t ghost people.”

“I think you’re just easy to fall for.” Seonghwa mumbled into his cup.

“What?” Hongjoong sat up in his chair. There was no way he heard that right.

“I’m sure these people liked you, so breaking up must be hard on them.” Seonghwa said.

“That’s not what you said.” Hongjoong frowned.

“Then I guess you heard me.” Seonghwa looked at him seriously.

Hongjoong just looked back at him.

Seonghwa was illuminated by the orange glow of the fire, the light catching in his hair and softening the lines of his face. Even the annoyed pinch of his brows couldn’t ruin how ethereal he looked.

Did Seonghwa just confess?

Or had he only meant that other people could fall for Hongjoong easily? The thought twisted in Hongjoong’s chest with equal parts of hope and disbelief. He knew he had heard Seonghwa correctly, but he didn’t know if he was reading too much into it. Had the alcohol made Seonghwa’s lips looser than normal?

The crackle of the fire filled the silence between them, and Seonghwa’s eyes flicked up, meeting his. For a moment, neither of them looked away.

“I have an idea.” Wooyoung clapped his hands like the previous exchange hadn’t happened. “Something fun to end the night.”

“It’s going to be sex.” Seonghwa deadpanned.

Wooyoung grinned. “Seonghwa, you know me so well.”

“I don’t know if I’m in the mood for an orgy.” Hongjoong let out a dry laugh.

“You’re still months away from being invited to the yearly orgy.” Wooyoung shook his head.

“He’s kidding right?” Hongjoong looked at Seonghwa.

“I think they haven’t done that since they got married.” Seonghwa shrugged.

“A foursome isn’t an orgy.” Wooyoung shook his head. “But I was thinking that you two could watch San blow me. Normal rules apply.”

Hongjoong looked to Seonghwa for approval and consent but all he saw was the other man nodding and giving his own approval without a second thought about what his Dom would think. Did they do things like this without Hongjoong knowing? Technically he only asked to control Seonghwa’s orgasms he hadn’t mentioned anything else sexual.

“Sounds fun.” Hongjoong nodded.

San dropped to his knees wordlessly and when he pulled out Wooyoung’s cock all of Hongjoong’s attention went to Seonghwa.

Hongjoong hadn’t expected Seonghwa to stay so still. The firelight flickered across his face, projecting a soft gold over his cheekbones and catching in his eyes. Whatever was happening a few feet away barely mattered. Per usual Hongjoong couldn’t look at anything but Seonghwa.

Seonghwa was watching the two men next to them, his gaze steady but unreadable. There was a quiet concentration in him, the kind that made Hongjoong’s pulse trip. His lips were slightly parted, and he looked caught somewhere between curiosity and something deeper, something that made his breath slow.

Did Seonghwa want to be in Wooyoung or San’s position? Or did he want to be on his knees for Hongjoong?

The air around them felt heavy though it was full of the vulgar sounds of San’s throat. Hongjoong didn’t dare to move or look away from Seonghwa. He didn’t want to miss the way Seonghwa’s eyes reflected the firelight, the faint tremor of his throat when he swallowed, or the way his fingers dug into his knees to keep from touching himself.

Hongjoong glanced over at San briefly. His lips were wet and he was looking up at Wooyoung with just the tip of his husband’s cock grazing his tongue. Hongjoong looked away again when Wooyoung pressed San’s head down on his length. The scene in front of him couldn’t hold his attention. Only Seonghwa could. It was how beautiful he looked, and how quietly undone he was. Hongjoong wanted to know what he was thinking more than anything else.

Seonghwa blinked and looked over to meet Hongjoong’s gaze. The surprise in his eyes was quickly replaced by something sharper, maybe curiosity, or maybe just mild amusement.

“You’ve been staring,” Seonghwa said, voice low but edged with challenge.

Hongjoong’s cheeks heated, and he quickly looked away. “I was just… noticing,” he muttered. “You look… focused.”

Seonghwa’s lips quirked into a brief, knowing smile. “Focused, huh?”

When Hongjoong didn’t say anything Seonghwa’s eyes flicked back to the scene next to them. It left Hongjoong feeling frustrated by also fascinated. He wasn’t sure if it was the fire, the alcohol, or Seonghwa himself, but it felt like things were shifting between them.

Maybe he would tell Seonghwa tonight. The date didn’t matter, Hongjoong could stop all of that. There didn’t have to be anything more with this man or any others. No more flowers in Seonghwa’s home that some other man gifted him with, just Hongjoong’s gifts. Only Hongjoong, no one else.

A sharp whine and then a deep moan from Wooyoung caught Hongjoong’s attention. He watched as his friend came into his husband’s mouth. San’s adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed and Hongjoong sat back in his chair and finished his drink.

This was clearly going to be the end to their night.

Seonghwa was the first to move, and Hongjoong followed him blindly. San was still on his knees with Wooyoung gently patting his head. It was an intimate moment that Hongjoong didn’t want to break with any kind of goodbyes.

“It feels weird to let you put your shoes on,” Seonghwa laughed while he watched Hongjoong slip a foot into his sneaker.

“We aren’t twenty-four seven.” Hongjoong smiled. “Is that even something you’re interested in?”

“I like acts of service.” Seonghwa shrugged. “Spending a weekend deep in dynamic sounds fun, but I couldn’t do more than that with my job.”

“How are you going to do without it?” Hongjoong asked without thinking.

He was supposed to confess early not piss Seonghwa off more.

“How are you? Or are you just going to be single until you find your kinky soulmate?” Seonghwa shot back.

Hongjoong shrugged. “I feel like I already have.”

Seonghwa froze, his expression softening for just a heartbeat before it went blank again, like a shutter closing over something delicate.

Hongjoong’s chest tightened. The pause, the flicker of something unspoken, made his decision to confess feel inevitable. He could do this. He could tell Seonghwa everything. He could find a way to express how his heart ached for Seonghwa and the way he had fallen weeks ago even if he didn’t know it right away. Hongjoong felt the weight of the moment settle around him. This was it. He couldn’t hide anymore.

He drew in a slow breath, steadying the tremor in his hands. Whatever came next, whatever Seonghwa felt, or didn’t feel, he had to speak.

It was time to confess.

Seonghwa spoke first.

“Hongjoong I need to tell you something.” Seonghwa stated quietly.

“Okay.” Hongjoong nodded. He’d let Seonghwa say it first.

“The flower guy, that was who took me out today.” Seonghwa started. “It was our third date and I’m seeing him again on Tuesday.”

The earth fell out from under him, stone by stone, each step crumbling into loose dirt instead of holding firm. His legs trembled as if the ground itself had betrayed him, and the world slowed around him and the air in his lungs suddenly felt too heavy to breathe. A sharp ringing filled Hongjoong’s ears, distant and intrusive all at once, and every detail of what Seonghwa had just said pressed against him with unbearable clarity. Hongjoong wanted to reach out, to grab onto something solid, but there was nothing to hold onto, and the news that had just landed in his chest.

Hongjoong couldn’t speak even though he wanted to beg Seonghwa not to see the man again.

“I’ll admit I saw him a few more times because I was mad with how you left on Sunday, but I think I like him, and it might be worth seeing where it goes.” Seonghwa continued. “So, I’m going to have the what are we talk with him.”

Hongjoong pressed his back to the wall, hands curling into fists at his sides as his stomach lurched violently. He wanted to be sick, wanted to collapse to the floor, but he forced himself to stay upright. Seonghwa’s words, I like him, were a slow and heavy weight that pressed down on his chest.

He could feel it everywhere: in the tightening of his throat, the sting behind his eyes, the way his fingers trembled despite his attempts to anchor them against the wall. Hongjoong swallowed hard, willing himself not to cry, not to make a sound that might give away the chaos that he felt inside of him. His heartbeat thundered in his ears, each beat louder than the last, echoing over the soft hum of the house around them.

“I’ll let you know how it goes on Wednesday okay?” Seonghwa reached out for him, but Hongjoong jerked away.

Hongjoong tried to look at Seonghwa, but all he saw was the faint outline of his profile in the dark. Hongjoong wanted to ask a question, something to make this easier, something to fix it, but his voice caught before any words could form.

So, he nodded once, so slowly, in an attempt to look calm but just came off as hollow. Every part of him ached. He had to breathe through it, had to convince himself that staying upright and silent was enough, even as the world tilted around him.

“Hongjoong I didn’t know that you actually...” Seonghwa kept talking.

Why wouldn’t he just stop?

“Do you?” Seonghwa paused. “Because I still...” He sighed. “I really feel like.” Seonghwa stopped trying to make it better.

Hongjoong could feel Seonghwa shifting slightly beside him, the faint scrape of a shoe against the floor breaking the silence. Hongjoong’s hands itched to reach out, to do something, anything, to bridge the distance between them, but he stayed still, rigid with the weight of his own restraint. Seonghwa didn’t want him. Seonghwa had already chosen, and he had to let Seonghwa go.

Every part of him screamed to ask a question, to demand an explanation that wouldn’t come. Pushing too far would shatter what little composure he had left anyway.

“He’s not you.”

Why wouldn’t Seonghwa stop talking?

Hongjoong’s chest felt tight, each inhale was shallow and painfully deliberate as he tried to keep the sobs from slipping out of his body. In all of the scenarios he had imagined, he had never thought that he’d lose Seonghwa in the most simple way. He never even had a chance, and the thought made his stomach twist again. Hongjoong had been too much of a coward to give himself that chance. He only had himself to blame.

Even with how much he was aching, Hongjoong couldn’t look away. Seonghwa’s presence was still the only thing holding him down to the earth, even as his heart threatened to splinter from the longing and disappointment pressing into it.

Time seemed to stretch, each second was heavy with unspoken words and unshed tears. Hongjoong forced himself to focus on anything that wasn’t Seonghwa. His ears turned into the faint hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. His eyes locked onto the outline of the doorframe, and then the way that Seonghwa’s shadow moved, but it did nothing to ease the ache inside of him. He stayed rooted in place, silent, waiting, caught between the urge to flee and the need to remain, unwilling to let go despite the quiet devastation twisting through him.

“Hongjoong I don’t even know if I want him.” Seonghwa reached for him again and Hongjoong grabbed blindly for the doorknob.

“It’s okay.” Hongjoong finally managed to say weakly. “I should have stayed. Anyway, this is what we agreed on. This was the plan.”

“The plan.” Seonghwa echoed. “Right, I was going to find someone and we were going to stop.”

“I’m just, I’m going to leave.” Hongjoong turned the doorknob. “I’ll see you Wednesday.”

“Hongjoong please wait.” Seonghwa grabbed his arm. “Tell me how you feel.”

“I can’t.” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’ll see you Wednesday.”

The moment Hongjoong stepped into the night, it hit him all at once. Tears burned his eyes, and he couldn’t stop them. His chest heaved with every ragged breath as he stumbled down the empty street, hands trembling against his face. The world blurred, the streetlights smeared, and the pavement tilted.

He didn’t care.

Each step pulled him further from Seonghwa, yet the ache followed, sharp and relentless. He pressed his hands harder to his face, tried to choke back the sobs, but they broke free anyway. He couldn’t hold it in; he didn’t want to. The grief rolled through him in waves, catching in his throat, making his legs weak, until he was nothing but the sound of his own pain and heavy footsteps echoing down the empty sidewalk.

There was no way he could confess now and ruin Seonghwa’s chance at the happy family he wanted so badly. If some simple miscommunication was enough to drive Seonghwa to some other man, it clearly meant that they weren’t destined to be together.

When he got home, he stumbled to his bedroom and was shocked to feel a heavy body settle into the bed with him. Hongjoong sobbed into the chest that he had cuddled into without knowing if it was Yunho’s or Mingi’s.

**

Hongjoong woke up alone but, for the first time in weeks, he felt fully rested. His eyes were puffy, his chest was still heavy, but there was a clarity in his brain that wasn’t there before. Maybe he needed to break down. Maybe he needed to let it all out. Now he could move on from it all.

Lying there in the warm morning light, Hongjoong finally realized that the hope he’d been clinging to was gone. The idea of confessing to Seonghwa wasn’t going to be his focus anymore. It was gone. All that was left was the quiet resolve to pull back, to disconnect, to stop feeding something that would never grow the way he wanted it to.

The next Wednesday, Seonghwa was going to end things or decide to continue. Either way Hongjoong’s heart was going to stay closed off. He knew he didn’t have the strength to stop things himself, so he’d go with whatever Seonghwa wanted, and just take steps to put some distance between them.

Maybe he was the masochist.

“Get up.” Yeosang’s voice called through the door.

“Fuck off.” Hongjoong called back.

“No, I need you.” Yeosang barged in. “Right now. Put on something athletic.”

“Absolutely not.” Hongjoong pulled the blanket over his head.

“Get your ass up and check your phone.” Yeosang pulled the blanket off the bed. “I need you to come to the gym with me and vibe check this guy.”

“You want me to meet your guy?” Hongjoong sat up and grabbed his phone.

Wooyoung

Please fight for him

We’re in your corner

Hongjoong

??

Wooyoung

Don’t be a coward

He cried so much after you left

Hongjoong resisted the urge to throw his phone across the room at Wooyoung’s too quick response, and he glared at his door. That conversation had clearly been a set up. He had to give up if Seonghwa was so focused on another man, that he didn’t even really want. It was obvious that what they were doing wasn’t the priority and that Seonghwa was just trying his best to find a partner to raise a family with.

That partner could be Hongjoong, but that wasn’t going to happen, not anymore.

“Hongjoong please,” Yeosang pleaded through the door. “You can just stand around, but I think things are getting serious and I need help.”

Hongjoong didn’t bother to answer him. He just pulled his body out of bed and threw on the first articles of clothing that looked enough like workout clothes. He ran his hands through his hair and opened his door.

“You look better than I thought you would.” Yeosang commented.

“I actually feel great.” Hongjoong shrugged. He had no idea how much Yeosang knew, but he assumed that Wooyoung and San had been gossiping. “Let’s go meet your man.”

“You know what? I think you’re full of shit, but I’m going to enjoy the attention anyway.” Yeosang shrugged.

“Tell me about him,” Hongjoong asked.

“He’s actually funny.” Yeosang started “Not like, trying too hard funny, but he just is. You know? He listens, too. Like, actually listens.”

Hongjoong smiled, trying to mirror Yeosang’s energy as they headed out of the apartment and down the sidewalk. “That’s rare. You sound happy.”

“I think I am,” Yeosang admitted. “Don’t make it weird when you meet him, okay?”

“Me? Never,” Hongjoong replied, even though he knew his tone landed somewhere between teasing and flat. Yeosang had a happiness on his face that Hongjoong hadn’t seen in years, not since his last relationship. It was the kind of expression Hongjoong used to hope Seonghwa had when he thought about him.

He knew better now.

Yeosang kept talking, with a general excitement that helped pick up Hongjoong’s mood. Apparently the two men had shared playlists and had an inside joke about a burnt yachae hotteok that the mystery man had bought Yeosang after the gym one night just because he was craving it. There were more cute things and Hongjoong stayed quiet, just nodding and huming his agreement.

The ache in his chest thudded in time with their steps.

When they reached the gym doors, Yeosang turned to him, nervous for the first time all morning. “You’ll like him,” he said.

“I’m sure I will,” Hongjoong answered softly, and he meant it.

When they walked in Yeosang scanned Hongjoong in as a visitor while Hongjoong scanned the room. He was surprised to see Jongho wiping down the seat on one of the leg press machines.

“Hold on I have to go say hi to someone,” Hongjoong looked back at Yeosang quickly before he jogged over to where Jongho was standing.

Jongho looked up surprised before he smiled, “no coffee?”

“Not at the gym.” Hongjoong rolled his eyes. “I didn’t even know you went here. Maybe you’ve seen my friend around.” Hongjoong looked back to Yeosang who had a horrified expression on his face.

There was no way.

“Oh, I know Yeosang,” Jongho said in an uncharacteristically soft tone.

Hongjoong turned to Yeosang again with his jaw slightly dropped.

“Of course you already know Jongho,” Yeosang rolled his eyes. “How small is this city?”

“He works with Seonghwa and knows San and Wooyoung,” Hongjoong pointed out.

“You know San and Wooyoung?” Yeosang’s eyes went wide and he turned to Hongjoong. “He works with your man?”

“Your man?” Jongho echoed. “I knew there was something going on there.”

“There’s nothing going on there,” Hongjoong looked at Jongho quickly.

“There is,” Yeosang corrected.

“Then who was the guy that stopped by on friday?” Jongho made a face. “Wait, what do you mean you both know San and Wooyoung?”

“Guy on Friday?” Hongjoong asked.

“We have a history.” Yeosang said at the same time.

“Wait.” Jongho held his arms in an x over his chest. “One thing at a time.”

“The guy,” Hongjoong suddenly couldn’t breathe.

Jongho frowned, his brows pulling together as he watched Hongjoong’s reaction. “Yeah. Tall guy, brown hair, nice suit. He tried to just drop off lunch for Seonghwa but Seonghwa came out and they went out. It was really long, but I got the food so that was a win.”

Hongjoong’s stomach twisted so hard he felt physical pain.

“He went to the office on Friday?” Hongjoong asked, voice barely above a whisper.

“Yeah,” Jongho said slowly, realizing something was wrong. “Did I say something wrong?”

Yeosang’s turned toward Hongjoong. “Hongjoong,” he said carefully, “are you okay?”

Hongjoong wasn’t okay. His thoughts were too loud, crashing into each other like waves. The guy on Friday. The one who brought flowers. Seonghwa had gone out on a lunch date before their scene. He didn’t stand a chance no matter what Seonghwa had said.

“Hongjoong,” Yeosang repeated.

He blinked and forced out a laugh, but it was too late. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.”

He wasn’t fine. His heart had started pounding in his ears. Of course Seonghwa liked this man. He was just trying to spare Hongjoong’s feelings the night before. Hongjoong pressed a hand to the back of his neck, trying to ground himself, but he felt trapped.

“Anyway,” he muttered, voice cracking. “I’ll let you guys work out the San and Wooyoung thing, but I totally approve over whatever is going on here. You make a super cute couple.”

He turned before anyone could stop him, and went to the nearest treadmill and ran until he couldn’t breathe anymore.

Chapter Text

Hongjoong called out of work on Monday because he couldn’t think straight. His head felt full of static, and every time he tried to focus on grading or lesson plans, all he could see was Seonghwa’s face. There was no way he could focus on the children like they deserved. 

He messaged Yeosang separately and got a heart reaction to the message. He’d be fine, they’d assign a helper to the class, and everything would continue on like normal. They didn’t need him. 

On Tuesday, Hongjoong didn’t even bother pretending that he was sick. He sent a quick email to his administrator—taking another sick day, still not feeling well—and then spent the rest of the morning staring at his phone. No new messages. Nothing from Seonghwa, not that that was unusual, but there nothing from anyone. No apology from Jongho, nothing from Wooyoung, none of his friends had even bothered to check in on him. 

He told himself he was fine with everyone giving up. It was better, really. It was his fault anyway for being so hopeless. If he had stepped up sooner, none of this would be happening. He’d be endlessly frustrated if any of his friends were behaving how he was. It wasn’t like he’d answer any of their messages right now anyway. 

Then there was Seonghwa, who might have already gone on the dreaded fourth date. If he was going to end things, Hongjoong just didn’t want to hear about it through a text message. He wanted to hear it in person, to look Seonghwa in the eyes while it was happening, even if it broke him. Still, he was terrified to get a message to not even bother with their Wednesday meeting. 

The silence stretched through the day, and Hongjoong was grateful for it. 

He started to imagine Seonghwa writing out a message, deleting it, rewriting it again, wondering how to let Hongjoong down in the gentlest way possible. Hopefully Seonghwa wouldn’t want to hurt him too much.  

Hongjoong had spent the evening looking at their messages from time to time expecting the three little dots to appear. 

By Wednesday, Hongjoong had decided to take the rest of the week off. He called his administrator early enough that they could use the same substitute. His voice sounded raw enough on the phone that he didn’t even have to fake it when he said he wasn’t feeling well. 

He slept away most of the day, blissfully dreamless. When he woke up Hongjoong rubbed at his temples and let out a loud groan. He wasn’t ready to lose Seonghwa, not yet, but deep down, he knew that being ready wouldn’t matter. 

No matter what he needed to leave, he couldn’t be late to being dumped. 

The apartment was quiet when he left his room and Mingi and Yunho hardly spared him a glance as he left. Were they mad at him for all of his dramatics? He couldn’t blame them. His feelings were obvious, and they all knew this crash was coming. They all warned him, but he just pretended, poorly, to have it under control and openly ignored their warnings. 

Jongho looked nervous when the elevator doors opened. 

“Hi,” Jongho waved. 

Hongjoong gave him a nod. “I was serious about you and Yeosang being a good couple. You’re both so happy and nervous about each other.” 

Jongho turned bright red, “we don’t need to talk about that.” 

Hongjoong smiled at him brightly. It felt good to feel normal for the first time in days. Teasing Jongho was a great way to pick up his mood.  

“I want to,” Hongjoong smiled. “Save me from my own misery. Did you talk about the San and Wooyoung stuff?” 

Jongho nodded. 

“And you’re okay with that?” Hongjoong quizzed him. 

“It’s not really my business.” Jongho shrugged. “I don’t really care about who he’s been with, not really. Even if it’s someone I’m close to. It’s not like Yeosang knew.” 

“He’s been into you the whole time.” Hongjoong smiled. “Longer than you know.” 

Jongho couldn’t hide his smile. 

“Cute.” Hongjoong gave him a soft smile. “You should make it official. He’s a hot commodity.” 

“Who’s a hot commodity?” A voice cut in from behind Hongjoong. 

After swallowing roughly Hongjoong turned to look at Seonghwa who, for the first time, looked as unkept as Hongjoong felt. 

“Yeosang.” Hongjoong smiled. “That’s Jongho’s gym guy.” 

“What?” Seonghwa’s eyes went wide.  

“Insane right? I guess you’re never going to be able to get rid of me.” Hongjoong let out a dry laugh even though he wasn’t joking.  

He had been careful to avoid thinking about how Yeosang was the lynch pin that brought the two parts of his world together. Yeosang was going to date Jongho, he was clearly still friends with Wooyoung and San, and he was obviously friends with Mingi and Yunho. There was no way that Hongjoong was ever going to be able to avoid Seonghwa. 

Hongjoong was going to have to watch from the side lines with a forced a smile as Seonghwa dated, married and raised a family with someone else. He was going to have to figure out a way to be okay with it or lose his already small social circle. 

“Well, that’s a good thing.” Seonghwa gave a tight smile. “I’d rather not lose you.” 

Hope bloomed.  

Hongjoong couldn’t help it. 

“Should we go talk?” Seonghwa waved in the direction of his office. 

Hongjoong gave a firm nod before he silently followed Seonghwa down the hallway. When the door was shut behind them Seonghwa sat at his desk, his pillow nowhere to be seen. 

The hope in his chest soured, but Hongjoong sat down anyway. 

“I missed your flowers this week.” Seonghwa sated plainly. “I really got used to them.” 

“I’ve been sick this week, and I think it would have been inappropriate to send them.” Hongjoong made a face. 

“I told you I didn’t even like him, not really.” Seonghwa folded his arms. 

Hongjoong looked at him with shock and anger. “You told me that you were going to have the what are we conversation with him Seonghwa. That means you like him enough.” 

“It doesn’t matter.” Seonghwa sighed. “I’m not anything with him, and I’m done dating for now. I want what we’re doing to be the focus.” 

Hongjoong’s heart was in his throat, but he had heard that lie before. 

“Seonghwa you can date.” Hongjoong tried to swallow.  

“I don’t want to.” Seonghwa answered firmly. “Not random men. I’m done.” 

Hongjoong tilted his head. 

“What did he do?” Hongjoong asked through gritted teeth. 

Seonghwa looked taken aback by the question, “he just wasn’t right. He was one of those guys that wanted to collect me and not love me. He said I’d have to go to all of his work functions so he could show me off.” 

“You are a prize though.” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’d want to show you off.” 

“It feels different when you say things like that.” Seonghwa pouted. “With him, when it said it, it felt wrong. He wanted me to quit my job too. Can you imagine that? I make more money than he does too. It felt like he was threatened by that. And there wouldn’t be any passion. How am I supposed to spend the rest of my life with someone’s who’s only passionate about dressing me up and showing me off?” 

Hongjoong could give him passion every single day. It would be slow, consuming, and steady. He could make Seonghwa feel wanted, cherished, like something rare and worth holding on to. He could treat Seonghwa like something precious, something that Hongjoong had earned and would fight to keep. Seonghwa wasn’t his prize to display though. No, Hongjoong would let him shine on his own. 

Hongjoong could give him all of that, if only Seonghwa would let him. 

Hongjoong nodded, “so what do you want?” 

“You.” Seonghwa answered quickly and cleared his throat. “To continue with you and what we’re doing.” 

Hongjoong had spent days preparing for a worst case scenario that wasn’t happening. He’d convinced himself that Seonghwa was going to simply thank him for everything, maybe even hug him, and then say goodbye. 

But that wasn’t what was happening. 

He was relieved, of course he was relieved, Seonghwa wasn’t gone. Still, underneath that relief was confusion, frustration, and something that felt like grief. 

It was like Seonghwa didn’t seem to notice how things had changed between them, but Hongjoong couldn’t keep pretending to be fine with what they had, not when he wanted so much more. 

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong said finally, his voice low and steady. “I think we need to talk about boundaries.” 

That made Seonghwa pause, the faint smile on his lips fading into a tiny frown. 

“I’m not ending anything,” Hongjoong started. “I just… I need to pull back a little. It’s getting hard to separate what’s part of our agreement and what’s not. I’m here with you until you want to move on, but I can’t be your replacement boyfriend. I need to stop spoiling you, and I don’t think I should hang out with Wooyoung and San if you’re there anymore.” 

There was a long silence before Seonghwa nodded, slow and uncertain. 

“Okay,” Seonghwa said softly. “If that’s what you need.” 

Hongjoong nodded too, “I think for right now that’s what’s best.” 

The silence after stretched long enough that Hongjoong to start counting the beats of his own heart. They echoed in his chest and made him want to say more, to confess like he originally wanted to, but the moment had already passed. 

Seonghwa sat across from him, his posture too perfect, and his hands folded too neatly on his desk. He wasn’t looking at Hongjoong, he was staring just past him, at the wall. The faint sound of traffic outside filled in the quiet, but it wasn’t enough to soften the tension between them. 

Hongjoong’s fingers drummed against his knee, a nervous reaction that he just couldn’t stop. Every few seconds, he thought about saying something, anything, to break the heavy silence between them. But every phrase that came to mind felt wrong, too sharp or too vulnerable. 

Finally, Seonghwa shifted in his seat, his voice quiet. “I don’t really know what to say right now.” 

“Me either,” Hongjoong admitted with a light laugh. 

Another silence followed, it was less heavy this time but still felt awkward. 

Everything was unbearable, the quiet, the space between them, the ache of everything unsaid. 

Hongjoong wanted to reach across the desk and touch Seonghwa’s hand to remind him that he wasn’t mad and the boundaries he wanted weren’t a punishment. Hongjoong stayed still though. He was afraid that even that small gesture might make things worse. 

So, he sat, and let the silence settle like snow around them. 

“Should we,” Seonghwa’s voice went quiet and weak. He cleared his throat and started again. “Should we talk about what we want to do on Friday?” 

Hongjoong’s eyes went wide with surprise, and he nodded. Seonghwa stood silently and opened his drawer with the pillow, and Hongjoong felt like his heart was about to beat out of his chest. How were they moving onto this so quickly when it felt like so many other things had been left unsaid? 

It could be good though. Scene negotiations were something simple and familiar for them. No matter how everything around them felt this was something that they could sink into without a second thought. Hongjoong corrected his posture as Seonghwa dropped to his knees to kneel on the pillow. It was still painfully quiet, but this was a type of quiet that he could deal with. 

Hongjoong didn’t mean to reach out, his hand moved on its own. His fingers hovered for a moment, hesitating in the small space between them, before the tips of his fingers finally brushed against Seonghwa’s cheek. Seonghwa stilled. His breath caught, his lashes flickering as his eyes lifted to meet Hongjoong’s.  

Hongjoong’s hand trembled. The whole moment felt so fragile, like one wrong move would make the moment shatter. 

“Do you have any requests bunny?” Hongjoong asked softly. 

Seonghwa didn’t answer right away. He just closed his eyes, exhaling slowly, and for a second, Hongjoong thought he felt him press into his palm, just barely, like a wordless apology. 

“Yes.” Seonghwa answered. 

“And what is it?” Hongjoong pressed. 

“Impact play.” 

Hongjoong laughed lightly at the simple response and moved his fingers from Seonghwa’s cheek to tuck his hair behind his ear before he moved his hand back to his own lap. 

“Of course. Are you sure you’re not punishing yourself for anything?” Hongjoong pressed. 

“I just like impact play Sir.” Seonghwa smiled, real and genuine. “And it was so good last time. I think it’s just what we need to get back into our routine.” 

“Our routine,” Hongjoong nodded. “What should that look like?” 

“With your boundaries?” Seonghwa made a sour face. “No gifts, not even coffee, just Wednesday’s, Friday’s, aftercare and you go home.” 

Hongjoong nodded again. 

“Can we still kiss?” Seonghwa looked up at him with wide eyes and Hongjoong’s heart clenched. 

“We can,” Hongjoong nodded. 

He did think of kissing as intimate and romantic, but he was a selfish man, and it seemed like Seonghwa wanted it. Hongjoong wasn’t going to stop giving Seonghwa everything he wanted just because his own heart was bruised. 

“Good,” Seonghwa nodded. “Then just very hands on impact play with very physical aftercare. I don’t normally need much, but with you, being held and kissed after would be nice.” 

“Okay,” Hongjoong nodded to himself a few times. “Oh, is your carpet ruined? I’ll replace it if you need me too.” 

“My cleaner got the stains out and I already replaced the broken dishes,” Seonghwa smirked. 

“I didn’t mean to waste all of that food,” Hongjoong laughed. “I just couldn’t wait. The whole plan went out the window.” 

“Hongjoong,” Seonghwa’s smirk grew. “I’ll ride you anytime you want.” 

“Even right here, right now?” Hongjoong challenged. 

Seonghwa’s eyes went wide, bright, and excited. 

“No,” Hongjoong laughed and swatted at Seonghwa’s nose with the tips of his fingers so hopefully it wouldn’t even blush red. “I’m kidding. Not at work, remember?” 

“I could just,” Seonghwa inched closer. “Put your cock in my mouth and suck. I could get you off without wrecking myself.” 

Hongjoong’s cock took interest at the offer, and he looked down at his lap upset at the level of betrayal.  

“Bunny, you said nothing at work.” Hongjoong shook his head. 

Seonghwa clearly caught onto the crack in Hongjoong’s resolve.  

“The door is locked, and how long would it really take for me to stand up and walk to it while you put your cock away if someone did knock on it?” Seonghwa’s hands went to Hongjoong’s thighs, and he knew he had lost control. 

They had just agreed to take a step back, set up boundaries, and now Hongjoong was sitting there, thinking with his cock, debating breaking one of the first rules that Seonghwa had put in place for them. He could cum quickly in Seonghwa’s mouth, and the chances of them being interrupted were so low. 

He had already made so many bad choices when it came to Seonghwa what was one more? 

“Fine.” Hongjoong gave in. 

“Wait really?” Seonghwa squeezed his thighs. “I promise I’ll be safe and not stupid about it, and no one will be able to tell after.” 

Hongjoong smiled, “just don’t choke on it, and don’t expect me to last.” 

“Okay.” 

Seonghwa fumbled forward in his excitement, and Hongjoong did his best not to laugh.  

“I don’t want your knees to leave that pillow.” Hongjoong stated. “You will not push yourself to far, and you will not make a mess.” 

“Yes Sir,” Seonghwa nodded. 

Hongjoong didn’t know if what they were doing was a good idea, but it felt safe in a way that nothing else had lately. This was familiar ground. Sex was something that they could do. Their dynamic had always been easy, and that hadn’t changed. 

Right now, he could just be here, with his beautiful boy, and let everything else fade into the background. They could both get lost in the moment, pretend that this was enough, that everything between them was this simple. It was so much easier than trying to talk about what was happening between them. 

Before Hongjoong knew it his cock was out and inside of the warm heat of Seonghwa’s mouth. He wasn’t sucking or moving though. 

No, Seonghwa’s head was laying on his thigh while Seonghwa’s mouth was simply full of Hongjoong’s hardening cock. 

Why did everything always have to feel so domestic? They weren’t supposed to be doing cock warming right now, but Hongjoong was still a weak man and his hand came down to tangle in Seonghwa’s hair, they could fix it later. 

Hongjoong was happy to let Seonghwa do what he wanted, and he was almost worried that the other man had fallen asleep until his cheeks hollowed slightly and he started to suck. Hongjoong let out a quiet groan and his hand tightened in Seonghwa’s hair. 

The sucking intensified but Seonghwa didn’t move his head. His cheek stayed firmly on Hongjoong’s thigh, and his eyes stayed closed. Hongjoong wanted to think about the sweetness of the moment and how much Seonghwa clearly needed this level of closeness, but he couldn’t focus on anything other than the lips wrapped around his cock and the tongue that was now slowly circling around the head. 

When Hongjoong came it was quiet, but he tugged on Seonghwa’s hair until his head was lifted off Hongjoong’s thigh. When Hongjoong’s hips stopped stuttering upwards Seonghwa sat back and used his hand to wipe at the corner of his mouth to clean any stray cum from it before he licked over his lips. He looked satisfied but still disheveled.  

Somehow nearly forty-five minutes had passed. 

“You need to get back to work bunny,” Hongjoong said as he reached out to fix Seonghwa’s hair for him. “Is cock warming something you’d want in the future?” 

“While you work.” Seonghwa nodded. 

Hongjoong laughed, “I don’t think that’s a possibility I don’t have an office to hide away in.” 

“In my office, you can grade,” Seonghwa nodded firmly. 

That idea didn’t feel like it was part of having good boundaries but neither did a sweet and lazy blow job in Seonghwa’s office. 

“We’ll see.” Hongjoong tucked his cock away. “What kind of impact did you want?” 

“You can pick.” Seonghwa nodded but stayed on his knees. 

“Bunny you need to get up now we’ve been in here about an hour.” Hongjoong stood. 

“Life is easier down here,” Seonghwa sighed. 

“Which is why you get to take breaks from life and be my good boy,” Hongjoong gave him a sweet smile. “But for now you have to go back to being a big scary executive.” 

“Things are easier with you around too.” Seonghwa looked at him. 

“And you get to take a break with me twice a week.” Hongjoong reached out to tap his shoulder. “Now get up please.” 

Seonghwa grumbled the whole way up, but he did stand and he did put his pillow away. 

“I don’t want you to stop taking care of me.” Seonghwa said like it was something he had been holding in for days. 

“I don’t plan to stop.” Hongjoong answered quickly. “I’m only going to stop when you tell me to. I’m here for you Seonghwa. This is where I want to be. I just need to be more careful.” 

“I understand,” Seonghwa said softly, nodding as he looked down. 

It was obvious he didn’t, but Hongjoong didn’t have it in him to explain. If he tried to untangle his thoughts now, he’d only make things harder for both of them. He couldn’t risk ruining how quiet and easy everything felt in that moment. 

Then Seonghwa leaned in, slow enough for Hongjoong to move away if he wanted to. He didn’t. The kiss was soft at first, tentative, with a valley of space between them. Hongjoong gave in before he could think better of it. He stepped forward until their bodies met, deepening the kiss. Seonghwa made a small, surprised sound, and Hongjoong could taste himself there, on Seonghwa’s tongue. 

Distance. Boundaries. 

Hongjoong forced himself to break the kiss. 

“Aftercare,” Seonghwa murmured, still a little dazed. 

“I’ll see you on Friday at our usual time. I’ll bring anything I need.” Hongjoong smiled as he walked to the door. “Have a good afternoon.” 

“I will.” Seonghwa said robotically as Hongjoong left the office. 

Hongjoong headed down the hallway. When he got to the lobby Jongho was exactly where he’d left him, but now he was standing stiffly like he’d been frozen there the entire time. His posture was too straight, his hands hovering awkwardly over the keyboard as if he wasn’t sure whether to keep working or pretend he hadn’t noticed Hongjoong leave in the first place. 

“Did you fix it?” Jongho asked. “I didn’t like the vibes of that other guy.” 

“Seonghwa didn’t like him.” Hongjoong shrugged. “I didn’t have to do anything.” 

“Are you going to do something?” Jongho pushed. 

“No.” Hongjoong answered firmly. 

“What did you mean when you said Yeosang was into me the whole time?” Jongho leaned forward. 

Hongjoong let out a laugh against his will. “I’m not gossiping about one of my best friends, that’s all you’re getting out of me.” 

“But he likes me enough to make it official?” 

“Yes.” Hongjoong laughed again. “He does, just ask him.” 

“Okay this weekend when I see him,” Jongho nodded firmly. 

“Cool get your guy and all that,” Hongjoong waved. “And be nice when you eventually end up in my apartment to hang out.” 

“Yeah, your other friends seem cool.” Jongho shrugged. “Cooler than you.” 

“Oh awesome,” Hongjoong rolled his eyes. “I’m so happy that you’re going to be sticking around.” 

“I’m happy about it,” Jongho smiled. “I can’t wait to see you around the twins too I bet you’re so awkward with them.” 

“I’m not awkward at all.” Hongjoong shook his head with a smile. “I teach with Yeosang I’m great with kids.” 

“You’re his co-teacher?” Jongho’s jaw dropped a little. 

Hongjoong nodded. 

“Yeosang talks about you so highly I thought he had a crush on you.” Jongho shook his head. 

“Nope.” Hongjoong laughed. “Just friends. We were never interested in each other, but get back to work. I’ll see you next week.” 

“Okay yeah, bye.” Jongho waved. 

** 

Hongjoong still had work off on Thursday and he decided to invite Wooyoung out to dinner. He knew a quiet, but amazing place that specialized in mandu where they could talk and hang out without being overheard. He knew Seonghwa was going to come up and that it would eventually lead into scene talk. 

He took his time getting ready, moving through the motions without really thinking. Hongjoong showered longer than usual, letting the hot water stream against the back of his neck until his skin was a little too warm. When he finally got dressed, he chose something simple, black jeans, a plain shirt, and a leather jacket. He didn’t want Wooyoung to think they were meeting to talk about feelings, even though that was exactly what was likely to happen. 

“Where are you headed?” Yunho asked when Hongjoong emerged from his room. 

“The mandu place a few blocks over. Do you want me to bring you guys anything back?” Hongjoong asked. 

“No, we’re going to hang out with Yeosang and his almost boyfriend later.” Yunho smiled. “Double date thing I guess.” He added likely so Hongjoong didn’t feel left out. 

“Cool.” Hongjoong nodded. He didn’t mind everyone being friends now as much as he did at the start. Not since he realized that Yeosang was actually the person that connected them all together. Hongjoong had the freedom to avoid any situations he wanted to because he wasn’t going to be the most important person at any of their hang outs. 

“So, Seonghwa?” Yunho cleared his throat. 

“Oh, He’s not dating anymore,” Hongjoong shrugged. 

“Because he’s dating you?” Yunho asked innocently. 

“No,” Hongjoong shook his head. “He’s just not dating anymore.” 

“Okay, I guess that’s a step in the right direction.” Yunho shrugged. 

Hongjoong went to the door to get out of the conversation. “It is what it is. I’m kind of neutral about it I asked to set up boundaries.” 

“I’m sure you’re so very neutral about it,” Yunho laughed. 

“I’ve got to go.” Hongjoong held up his phone. “Wooyoung is already there with a table. You can lecture me later.” 

“Boundaries are good. I just don’t believe you’re actually going to have them.” Yunho turned away from him. “There’s no deep speech, but I am still pro you just telling him how you feel.” 

“Listen, he got mad at me and almost ended up dating someone else,” Hongjoong grumbled. “That’s not something someone who has feelings for me is going to do.” 

“It is if they don’t think you like them.” Yunho pointed out. “Maybe he’s scared of getting hurt too.” 

“Okay I’m leaving.” Hongjoong waved his arm. “Have a good time with Yeosang and the baby.” 

“I will,” Yunho waved at Hongjoong. 

The hallway outside of his apartment door was cooler than the apartment. It was already getting dark, and Hongjoong picked up his pace to stay warm and just because he hated to be late. He pulled his jacket tight around himself and started down the block, heading to the mandu restaurant. Once he rounded a corner he could see the neon sign flicker in the distance. He tried his best not to think about what kind of a conversation was waiting for him while he walked through the door. 

Wooyoung was already there, in the darker far corner of the restaurant. A waitress was already bringing over platefuls of food and there was a beer in front of the empty seat that was his. When he got closer, he noticed the bottle of soju on the table. 

“Sorry I’m late.” Hongjoong said as he sat down. “I was talking to Yunho.” 

“Am I still not allowed to hang out with your roommates? Mingi sends fun memes on insta.” Wooyoung frowned. 

“You can do what you want. I think it’s all inevitable now anyway. Did Yeosang tell you the guy he likes is Jongho?” Hongjoong took a long sip of his beer. 

“Yeah it freaked San out.” Wooyoung laughed. “He called Jongho right away, and you know Jongho, he’s so even tempered that he was just laughing at San the whole time.” 

“Is San good with it now?” Hongjoong set the glass down and opened a soju bottle, he had the next day off he could afford to be a little hung over the next day. 

“Oh yeah he doesn’t care anymore.” Wooyoung laughed. “I think he’s over the shock of someone who’s basically his little brother wanting to fuck someone he’s been intimate with.” 

Hongjoong let out a laugh. “They’re such a cute couple.” 

“They are.” Wooyoung nodded, setting his beer down with a small clink. “What about you and Seonghwa?” 

“Not a couple.” Hongjoong waved both hands quickly, like he could swat the thought away. He reached for his chopsticks, snatched up a dumpling, and stuffed it into his mouth before he could say anything else. 

Wooyoung stared at him. “You two are frustrating. Nothing happened yesterday?” He finished off his beer in one long sip, his tone was somewhere between disbelief and exasperation. 

“I mean…” Hongjoong swallowed, eyes flicking down to his plate. “I told him we needed better boundaries.” He paused. “And then he blew me in his office, so I don’t think the whole boundary thing is going well.” 

Wooyoung’s jaw dropped. “He did what?” 

Hongjoong just shrugged, half apologetic. “It was almost a cockwarming thing. He just sat there with it in his mouth for almost a half hour.” 

Wooyoung groaned loudly, dragging his hands down his face. “I hate both of you so much.” 

“Me too.” Hongjoong nodded solemnly, then reached for another dumpling. 

“No, really,” Wooyoung shook his head. “You should be together. This is the tough love that you need, and I told him the same thing. There is no reason for you both to not be together.” 

“There’s plenty of reasons.” Hongjoong frowned. “You and San don’t even think I can feed myself. How does that translate into you thinking I can take care of Seonghwa and a family?” 

“Don’t be dense,” Wooyoung snatched the soju that Hongjoong had poured and shot it back before he grabbed the tablet on the table to order another beer. “I see how you are with him and my kids.” 

“No seriously.” Hongjoong shifted in his seat. “I bet I don’t even make half of what he does, I’m so much younger than you guys too. We’re at different places in life. I haven’t thought about a spouse or a family in anything but an abstract way yet. I don’t know if I want to change my career. Seonghwa would have to carry us for a while and he doesn’t know if he’d want to take a sabbatical from work to raise the hypothetical kids he wants. I’m just not good enough for him. The only thing I offer him is being a simp as a Dom so he gets everything he wants from me.” 

“That’s,” Wooyoung blinked as a drink got dropped down in front of him. “That’s a lot.” 

“It’s just all true.” Hongjoong poured himself a shot of soju. “Objectively.” 

“You know, and I shouldn’t even say this.” Wooyoung started. “The first time he saw you with the girls he couldn’t stop talking about you with them. Something about it being sexy but also you looked so responsible. He really doesn’t care about how young you are, and I doubt he’d care about you getting settled into a career.” 

“Yeah well,” Hongjoong shrugged and stuffed a dumpling into his mouth. “It doesn’t matter.” 

“It does if you two dumbasses have romantic feelings for each other.” Wooyoung groaned. “Plus, it’s going to be so much easier for all of us to hang out if you two are dating. I can’t imagine you moping around if Seonghwa brings another guy around.” 

“I’ve imagined it a lot.” Hongjoong said after he swallowed. He poured himself another shot. “I just don’t think it’s going to happen. I don’t think he feels the way you think he does. Has he said the exact words?” 

“No but he sobbed the night you left him at our house.” Wooyoung shook his head. “Way to kill our afterglow by the way. I was going to fuck my husband, and we had to comfort Seonghwa.” 

“He broke my heart.” Hongjoong shook his head. “I don’t care if he cried.” 

Wooyoung let out a sharp laugh. “You do care.” 

Hongjoong didn’t answer right away. He stared into his beer, watching the liquid slosh around as he set it down. “I care that he was hurt,” he said finally. “That’s different.” 

“That’s denial,” Wooyoung countered. “What a classic Hongjoong move.” 

“I’m not doing this again,” Hongjoong muttered, rubbing a hand over his face. “I already fell once. I’m not doing it twice just because he doesn’t know what he wants, and he gets emotional boners when he sees me with kids.” 

Wooyoung leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. “You ever think maybe he does know what he wants, and he’s just scared to say it?” 

Hongjoong let out a humorless laugh. “That’s the thing, Youngie. If he wanted me, he’d have said it. He’s not shy, he’s just careful.” 

For a moment, they sat in silence, the noise of the restaurant filling the space between them. 

Wooyoung finally spoke again, voice softer now. “So, what are you going to do?” 

“I don’t know,” Hongjoong said, looking up at him, tired and small. “Maybe just keep up with the boundaries. Stop getting him gifts, start being a little more selfish with scenes.” 

Wooyoung sighed. “You say that like you’re capable of either of those things.” 

Hongjoong gave a crooked, bitter smile. “Yeah. I know.” 

“What are these boundaries anyway? Aside from the gifts and the flowers?” Wooyoung took a sip of his beer. 

“Not hanging out with him at your house.” Hongjoong pointed. “And don’t think I’m not aware that you completely set up the other night. You know I cried too, and I never cry.” 

“You both need to stop hurting yourselves.” Wooyoung shook his head. 

“You mean each other.” Hongjoong corrected. 

“No, you’re hurting yourselves.” Wooyoung finished off his second beer. 

“Well, we’ll see how the next scene and the boundaries go. If it doesn’t work, then one of us is going to have to end it. We can’t keep going on how we are.” Hongjoong shrugged. 

Wooyoung frowned, the teasing gone from his expression. “You say that like either of you has enough courage to actually end it.” 

Hongjoong let out a tired laugh. “You’re probably right. We’re both too attached for our own good.” 

“That’s one word for it,” Wooyoung muttered. “Self destructive is another.” 

“Yeah, well,” Hongjoong said as he leaned back in his chair. “If we can’t fix this, and stay platonic I’d rather end it before we ruin everything else. I don’t want him to hate me. Not when we still have to be around each other.” 

Wooyoung studied him for a long moment. “He’s not going to hate you,” he said finally. “But if you keep pretending you don’t love him, you’re going to start hating yourself.” 

Hongjoong didn’t answer. He just reached for his glass and downed the rest of his drink, hoping the soju would drown out how true that sounded. 

“We do all gossip about you two.” Wooyoung laughed in an attempt to lighten the mood. “We’re all rooting for things to end well.” 

“If we can stay emotionally distant it’ll end well.” Hongjoong nodded, he knew he sounded like he was trying to convince himself, and he was. 

“I know I already said it but I really do hate both of you.” Wooyoung laughed. “Okay lets change the topic what are you doing for the next scene?” 

“More impact play.” Hongjoong looked around. “I already bought a paddle, just a long leather one, nothing crazy.” 

“Do you feel like he’s punishing himself?” Wooyoung asked honestly. 

“I don’t know,” Hongjoong made a face. “I just need to trust him.” 

Wooyoung tilted his head, unconvinced. “If it feels off, it probably is.” 

Hongjoong nodded and ordered himself another beer and another plate of plain chicken dumplings. “He said he wants it. I know that it helps him unwind.” 

Wooyoung sighed. “You can give him what he needs without letting him punish himself, you know.” 

Hongjoong nodded, eyes down on the table. “Yeah. I’m always careful with him. I don’t feel like he’s using the impact to punish himself for that guy or anything. He just likes to be in subspace and not have to think. That’s all it is.” 

Wooyoung leaned back and gave him a long, knowing look. “That’s fair.” 

“I trust him completely.” Hongjoong nodded. “Even when things are weird, we’re open and honest about everything to do with our dynamic.” 

“Yeah you’re using it as a surrogate for your actual feelings. So healthy of you.” Wooyoung clapped which got the attention of a few people around them. 

“Okay okay. I think I’ve let you harass me for long enough. Let’s change the subject.” Hongjoong shook his head. “And because people are watching us now.” 

“So, San and I are super close to finally starting our company.” Wooyoung grinned. “How cool is that?” 

Hongjoong blinked, surprised, and then smiled. “That’s incredible.” 

“Right?” Wooyoung’s grin widened. “We found a studio space downtown. It’s small, but the mirrors are perfect, and the floors are springy enough for San’s ridiculous jumps.” 

“I’m actually really proud of you two,” Hongjoong said, leaning back in his chair. “That’s huge.” 

Wooyoung preened a little. “We already have about twenty dancers that want to work with us that already work with some of the groups we choreograph for. We’re even going to steal someone from SM to help us with admin work.” 

Hongjoong laughed brightly. “Just stealing everyone’s people.” 

“It’s not my fault that everyone likes San and I more than big corporations.” Wooyoung grinned. “It’s going to be so nice to be my own boss.” 

“That’s a dream.” Hongjoong nodded. 

“Won’t you be able to be your own boss if you go into child psychology eventually?” Wooyoung questioned. 

“I’d need to finish school, but yeah.” Hongjoong nodded. 

“Something to look forward to I guess.” Wooyoung smirked. “That would make it easier to watch your own kids.” 

“Don’t start.” Hongjoong pointed at him with his chopsticks. 

They fell into easier conversation after that. The topics drifted from dance to work, to gossip about mutual friends, and eventually to nothing of importance at all. 

Their plates emptied slowly, the plates of steaming dumplings were now just scattered crumbs and cooling sauce. Between bites, Wooyoung animatedly described a new routine he was choreographing, and Hongjoong listened with half a smile, enjoying the normalcy. It felt like a break from the constant noise in his head. It was the first time he could remember thinking that his friendship with Wooyoung could last beyond Seonghwa. 

When their server came by to clear the plates, Hongjoong leaned back, full and content. He gave Wooyoung a lazy smile as their conversation also died down. 

Wooyoung paid before Hongjoong could argue. “Let your elders pay.” 

“You need to stop spoiling me,” Hongjoong said as he stood up and stretched. 

“Hey.” Wooyoung looked at him mischievously. “Want to learn some pretty knots?” 

“Yes.” Hongjoong nodded without thinking. 

“Then I guess you’re coming home with me.” Wooyoung grinned. 

Wooyoung stayed quiet until they hit the street. 

“I figured you’d want to tie Seonghwa up someday,” he said, shrugging as he walked. “And with more impact play it could be a good opportunity. Plus, I have a perfect boy to practice on.” 

“Wait.” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide, and he skidded to a stop, making Wooyoung glance back. “You’re going to let me practice on San?” 

Wooyoung laughed, the sound half teasing, half exasperated. He pushed his hands into his pockets. “You can’t practice on me if I’m supposed to instruct you, and I know you don’t want me around Seonghwa in that kind of a setting,” he said. “So, it would have to be Sannie. It’ll be a nice little treat for him after watching the girls solo.” 

Hongjoong opened his mouth, closed it, then forced a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. The idea of anyone else touching Seonghwa that way tightened something in his chest. He had no idea how Wooyoung and San could be so open and free with their relationship. It wasn’t really for him to understand though. That was their relationship, and he knew he had a wicked possessive streak. 

It was one thing to know that Seonghwa had, in the past, been with Wooyoung and San it was another thing to think about it and imagine what the context was and what they had done with each other. 

“He likes bondage.” Wooyoung commented. “I don’t know if he’s mentioned that yet because he’s convinced you to do all stuff he’s never done before,” he paused to laugh. “But it’s like a top three thing for him.” 

Hongjoong nodded. Of course, Wooyoung said the exact thing he didn’t want to hear but he felt loose enough from the alcohol that it didn’t make his blood boil as much as it could have. 

“I’m not letting you touch my husband if you don’t sober up enough on the walk by the way.” Wooyoung pointed out. 

“That’s fine.” Hongjoong nodded. “It makes sense. I wouldn’t want to hurt him.” 

“He is precious goods.” Wooyoung grinned. “Anyway, Seonghwa. Just so you know, the imprints after from the rope look so good on his tan skin and he loves them so I’ll show you something pretty for him.” 

Hongjoong swallowed, “I don’t think I want to be reminded that you touched him.” 

“It’s not like it was emotional. It was just getting off.” Wooyoung shrugged. “I love him and so does San but we aren’t in love with him.” 

The like you are hung between them. 

Hongjoong waved his hands, “I’m just possessive in a way you guys aren’t. Don’t mind me. It’s not like he’s mine or anything.” 

“Don’t be exhausting.” Wooyoung rolled his eyes. “He’s yours, he’s been yours. It doesn’t matter how many dates he’s been on.” 

“Okay no more Seonghwa talk.” Hongjoong grumbled. “I can only be insulted and called frustrating so many times.” 

“Don’t worry I tell him the same stuff.” Wooyoung skipped ahead of Hongjoong and looked back at him. “You’re both idiots.” 

“I don't care stop saying it to me.” Hongjoong rolled his eyes and jogged to catch up to Wooyoung. 

The walk to Wooyoung’s house was quiet for a few blocks while they both enjoyed the cool night air against their alcohol flushed skin.  

“So, what do you actually know about tying knots?” Wooyoung asked suddenly, breaking the silence as they started to walk up the last hill to Wooyoung’s house. 

Hongjoong glanced at him, brow furrowed. “Enough to make sure they stay in place, not enough to make them pretty.” 

Wooyoung laughed. “Pretty isn’t the point. Safe and secure is the point. Though, if you’re doing decorative work, the aesthetic does start to matter.” 

“I’m not sure Seonghwa cares about pretty,” Hongjoong said, half smiling. “But I do want it to feel right, and be safe.” 

Wooyoung nodded thoughtfully, kicking a loose pebble along the sidewalk. “Then you’ll need to learn the difference between restraint and restriction. Knots that hold versus knots that hurt. The way you tie them can say a lot about your expectations for the scene.” 

“Like tone of voice.” 

“Exactly.” Wooyoung grinned. “You’ll see once we start practicing. San’s good at feedback, he’ll tell you when it’s too much.” 

Hongjoong made a face. “I still can’t believe you’re letting me practice on him.” 

“Relax,” Wooyoung said, laughing. “He’s been begging for an excuse to get tied up since last month. You’ll make his week.” 

Hongjoong shook his head, but he was smiling now, tension easing out of his shoulders as the warm light from Wooyoung’s windows came into view. 

They got to the door, and Wooyoung let them in. San walked by and obviously tried not to look surprised at the sight of Hongjoong. 

“We’re practicing knots on you.” Wooyoung stated simply and San’s cheeks instantly flushed pink. “We all win. Get the baby monitor.” 

San laughed, but didn’t look phased by the outburst. Hongjoong figured he’d have to be used to some level of impulsivity with a husband like Wooyoung. 

“We’ll do it in the office.” Wooyoung called out quietly enough to not wake up the girls but loudly enough to be heard. “You go.” He pointed to Hongjoong. “I need to get the rope.” 

Hongjoong went without argument. He was more amused than anything else and when he got to the office San was standing there with the baby monitor on the desk. 

“Was this his idea?” San said with a laugh. 

“You know it was.” Hongjoong shook his head. “Apparently Seonghwa is into it.” 

“He is.” San looked around the room. “Are you two going to figure it out? I was worried when you were fighting last week.” 

“We’re not fighting anymore.” Hongjoong shrugged. “It’s a little more complicated than just figuring it out though.” 

“So you’ll get there.” San smiled. “That’s good.” 

Hongjoong shook his head as Wooyoung walked into the room holding a twisted length of rope. 

“It’s jute, so it’s scratchy.” Wooyoung stated. “It’ll likely leave red marks not just imprints.” He turned his attention to San as he set down a pair of safety scissors. “Take your shirt off and don’t move too much. We’re going to do a column tie.” 

Hongjoong did his best not to look at San too closely after he took his shirt off, but it was hard not to. San was strong and muscled with an impossibly small waist. His body was something that other men would covet even if they didn’t want to fuck him. 

San stood with his hands loose at this sides with a faint knowing smile on his lips, and Hongjoong leaned back against the edge of the desk as he watched Wooyoung lift the length of tan rope and let it unfurl between his fingers. The fibers looked soft from use and Hongjoong remembered something he read once about treating the rope. 

“Alright,” Wooyoung said, his tone casual but focused. “We’ll start with the basics. The column tie. You’ll use this for wrists, ankles, and arms. Anything you want to keep aligned or secure. Always start simple and safe.” 

He folded the rope in half, holding up the center loop. “This is your bight. You always start with this. It’ll keep the ends even and it gives you a quick release point if something goes wrong.” 

San turned his wrists forward, presenting them without hesitation. 

“Good boy,” Wooyoung murmured as he stepped closer. He slipped the bight around San’s wrists, pulling the ends through the loop in one smooth motion. “You want it snug, not tight. The goal is to restrict, not harm. You should still be able to fit a finger under the rope.” 

San’s shoulders rolled slightly as he tested the tension. “Feels fine,” he said, his voice calm. 

Wooyoung nodded, wrapping the rope again with careful precision, his fingers moving like he’d done it a thousand times. “You do this a couple of times for structure, then cross over. See how everything stacks evenly? That’s what keeps it secure without cutting in.” 

Hongjoong stepped closer, his focus fixed on Wooyoung’s hands. The rope moved like an extension of his body, measured, controlled and deliberate. Honestly if San was his submissive, he’d have that beautiful body tied up at all times too. Personally, Hongjoong just liked to see Seonghwa struggle to hold himself back from moving. Maybe this would change that though. 

“Then,” Wooyoung continued, looping the ends back through to lock it in place, “you finish with a single knot here. Small and easy to untie.” He gave the rope a light tug and stepped back. “That’s your column tie. Strong, safe, and it looks good.” 

San glanced down at his bound wrists, then back up with a small, teasing smile. “You make it look easy.” 

“Because it is,” Wooyoung said with a grin before turning to Hongjoong. “Your turn. Try it exactly how I did it. You don’t have to rush.” 

Wooyoung pulled the knot loose and pulled the rope off San before he handed it to Hongjoong. He took the rope when it was offered to him, completely surprised by how heavy it felt in his hands. Hongjoong mirrored the motions he was shown. He folded the bight, looped it over San’s wrists and checked the tension with a focus he didn’t know he could have. 

“Good,” Wooyoung murmured, stepping behind him. “Keep your hands steady. Think about intention, each movement should mean something. This should be part of the scene too. It’ll help set the mood.” 

Hongjoong nodded, finishing the last wrap and tying it off neatly. He tugged gently, testing the structure. San didn’t flinch, only met his gaze with a steady and calm look. 

Wooyoung smiled, satisfied. “See? You’re a natural.” 

Hongjoong looked down at what he’d done, a faint flush creeping up his neck. “Guess I just had a good teacher.” 

“Don’t flatter me,” Wooyoung said lightly. “We’ll see how you handle untying it. Then I want you to do it three more times.” 

“Three?” Hongjoong whined. 

“Maybe more I want you to memorize it.” Wooyoung reached out and shoved at his shoulder. “I’m not letting you cut off Seonghwa’s circulation.” 

“You know I’m careful with him.” Hongjoong shook his head. “I’d never risk actually hurting him.” 

“Either way you’re doing it a few more times. Maybe next week I’ll show you some other prettier ways to tie ropes.” Wooyoung smiled and nodded to San. 

San was standing quietly with his hard cock pressing obscenely against his sweatpants. There was no ignoring it, and Hongjoong had to do his best to not wonder if it was because of him, or because of the situation. It was clear that San had slipped into a different headspace, and Wooyoung was carefully monitoring him. 

Hongjoong went through the motions of the next tie silently, ignoring San’s arousal as he went. It wasn’t long before he was done with his second try. Hongjoong studied the tie around San’s wrists. 

“Should the wraps sit higher on the forearm?” he asked without looking up. 

Wooyoung stepped closer, folding his arms as he glanced over Hongjoong’s shoulder. “A little. You want the tension to rest where there’s more muscle, not bone. It’s safer and looks cleaner.” 

“Right,” Hongjoong murmured. He loosened the rope and rewrapped it. 

He went slower this time and focused on the way the way the fibers moved against San’s skin. His motions were methodical. He didn’t have any room to be aroused, and he refused to think about doing this to Seonghwa the following evening. 

San shifted slightly, breathing out through his nose, and Hongjoong caught the faint movement in his peripheral vision. He pushed the thought of San being turned on out of his head and refocused. “Like this?” 

Wooyoung leaned in, the hint of approval in his tone. “Exactly. Keep the lines parallel you don’t want anything overlapping. It’ll look better in photos too, if you ever decide to document your scenes.” 

“Yeah that’s not going to happen.” Hongjoong laughed tightly. “I’ve thought about taking pictures, but I don’t know if Seonghwa would go for that. 

“No, he likes taking pictures.” San cut in with a weak voice. “I’ve taken some of him, he’s very into it.” 

“And they were such pretty pictures too.” Wooyoung cooed as he reached out to pat San’s chest. “You’re doing so good baby. Are your arms getting tired?” 

“A little, but I’m good.” San smiled. 

“I’ll take care of you when Hongjoong leaves.” Wooyoung promised. “Just stay a good boy for us.” 

The use of the word us burned through Hongjoong, but he let it slide. He was just here to learn something not be part of their scene. 

Hongjoong tightened the knot, and stuck a finger under the rope to test it. “And the bight, should it face toward me or away?” 

“Toward,” Wooyoung answered. “That way, if you need to untie quickly, it’s easy to reach.” 

“Got it.” Hongjoong exhaled slowly, concentration written across his face. He tested the tie once, twice, then looked to Wooyoung again. “What about circulation? How do I check without interrupting the scene?” 

Wooyoung smiled faintly. “Just ask, or you can touch if you’re using a gag.” He stepped forward, pressing two fingers lightly to the inside of San’s wrist. “You want his wrist warm and his pulse steady.” 

Hongjoong nodded again, repeating the movement himself. 

“Good,” Wooyoung said. “Now do it again. You’ll want this to be muscle memory eventually.” 

Hongjoong practiced over and over. He asked Wooyoung questions as he went, and San stayed silent and good. Hongjoong almost wanted to ask to see how Wooyoung was going to get him off, but he didn’t want to overstep. It would be purely selfish to ask, and he wanted to keep his relationship with them as educational as possible. 

“Okay I think that’s enough for tonight.” Wooyoung stated. “I need to take care of Sannie, and you need to get home.” 

Hongjoong nodded as he pulled the rope loose one last time. When he went to hand it to Wooyoung, Wooyoung just shook his head no. 

“I doubt you have rope and I don’t want you to scramble to buy it tomorrow. Take it and the scissors.” Wooyoung pointed to them. “Do you think you can see yourself out.” 

“Yeah.” Hongjoong nodded and his eyes drifted down to the wet spot on the front of San’s sweatpants.  

“Go.” Wooyoung laughed letting Hongjoong know that he wasn’t mad. 

“Thanks for this, I wasn’t expecting it.” Hongjoong smiled. “Seriously you’re a great mentor.” 

“Oh my god, leave.” Wooyoung rolled his eyes. “I need to bend him over this desk and get my dick wet before one of the kids wake up.” 

Hongjoong laughed, maybe too loudly, before he slipped out of the office and then out of the house.  

Hongjoong started the walk home, his thoughts inevitably circling back to Seonghwa. His brain felt calmer now, but his thoughts were still tangled. Before he even got home he made the decision to call Seonghwa. 

Hongjoong settled into bed as he pressed the little phone icon on Seonghwa’s contact. It wasn’t good boundaries, he knew that. He had been the one to insist they needed distance, that they needed to separate the physical from everything else. Still, after his conversation with Wooyoung, the need to hear Seonghwa’s voice took over. 

Seonghwa did have feelings for him and that should have given Hongjoong hope, but it didn’t. Feelings weren’t always enough, and even if Seonghwa had romantic feelings for him, it didn’t mean that they would ever figure out a way to make it work. He really had to decide if he was going to go back to plan A and confess or if he was going to respect Seonghwa not dating, and his own boundaries, and wait for Seonghwa to come to him. 

When Seonghwa answered he sounded groggy. “Hongjoong?” 

“Yeah,” he breathed out. “Sorry, it’s late.” 

“It’s fine,” Seonghwa murmured. “Is something wrong?” 

Hongjoong hesitated. He stared up at the ceiling in the dark, fingers gripping his phone a little tighter. “No, nothing’s wrong. I just wanted to hear your voice.” 

There was a pause, one long enough that Hongjoong almost regretted saying it, but then Seonghwa spoke again. “You shouldn’t call me when you’re lonely,” he said gently. “You’re trying to build boundaries, remember?” 

“I know,” Hongjoong sighed. “I was just out with Wooyoung and I felt like I needed to talk to you.” 

He could hear Seonghwa’s quiet exhale, the faint sound of sheets shifting. “You’re making this really hard,” Seonghwa whispered. 

“I know,” Hongjoong said again, voice low. 

“Hold on,” Seonghwa murmured, and Hongjoong could hear the rustle of sheets through the speaker. 

Hongjoong looked at his phone as the screen changed from a voice call to a video call. After a second of hesitation, he accepted it and smiled when Seonghwa’s sleepy face appeared in the dim light. 

It felt good to call Seonghwa just because, it felt right. 

“What did you and Wooyoung do?” Seonghwa asked with a yawn, rubbing at his eyes before sinking further into his pillow. 

“We drank and talked,” Hongjoong answered, shifting onto his side and propping his phone up against his pillow. “Ate mandu.” 

Seonghwa let out a quiet hum, his eyes fluttering half-shut. “What did you talk about?” 

“You,” Hongjoong admitted with a faint smile. “Me being stupid, the girls, how their dance company is finally coming together. Just stuff.” 

“That sounds nice,” Seonghwa said softly, his lips curling into a small smile that made Hongjoong’s heat beat faster. 

“Hey, Seonghwa?” Hongjoong swallowed hard, voice barely above a whisper. 

“Yeah?” Seonghwa rasped, blinking slowly. 

“I don’t like thinking that you’re replacing emotional pain with physical pain,” Hongjoong blurted out. 

Seonghwa let out a strained laugh and rolled onto his back. “I’m not doing that, I promise.” 

“The impact play isn’t because of that guy, or that we had an argument?” Hongjoong pressed, his voice tight. 

“Believe it or not, Hongjoong,” Seonghwa laughed again, this time softer. “I’m very selfish about my pleasure, and I’m not going to put myself through something I don’t like just because the men in my life are inadequate or stupid.” 

Hongjoong couldn’t stop the quiet laugh that slipped from him. “I’m not inadequate.” 

“I didn’t say you were,” Seonghwa teased, a small smile curving his lips. “You’re just… a lot.” 

Hongjoong tilted his head. “A lot?” 

“In the best way,” Seonghwa said, tone gentle now. “You go into everything so fully that it all ends up feeling very intense. It’s very scorpio of you.” 

“Very Scorpio of me? You’re into that stuff?” Hongjoong laughed, tilting his head against the pillow and watching Seonghwa’s expression on the screen. 

“I am.” Seonghwa nodded slowly, his hair falling into his eyes as he adjusted his phone. “Did you know that we aren’t compatible, not really anyway.” 

“It’s a good thing that stuff is all bullshit then,” Hongjoong said with a soft laugh. 

“It’s not,” Seonghwa whined, his nose scrunching as he shifted back onto his side. “Everything just says we’d have to work through conflict.” 

“It’s still silly,” Hongjoong chuckled, his lips quirking as he watched Seonghwa’s pout grow deeper. 

“Can I ask for something tomorrow?” Seonghwa asked changing the topic. 

“Anything.” Hongjoong nodded and Seonghwa laughed. 

Seonghwa took a breath. “I just want praise please.” 

“That’s easy.” Hongjoong nodded. “I can do that.” 

“Anyway,” Seonghwa cleared his throat. “I should sleep for work tomorrow.” 

“Do you want to get off?” Hongjoong asked seriously. 

“Just sleep tonight.” Seonghwa yawned to punctuate his tiredness. 

“I just wanted to see you come undone, you’re so beautiful.” Hongjoong sighed. “It’s okay though, you go sleep.” 

“I will. I’ll see you tomorrow Hongjoong.” 

Seonghwa hung up before the I love you could escape Hongjoong’s mouth. 

Boundaries? What were those? 

** 

Hongjoong felt lighter than he had in weeks as he made his way down the street toward Seonghwa’s apartment. His steps were steady, unhurried, though he realized partway through that he was early, earlier than he needed to be. 

It didn’t matter. 

Seonghwa was waiting for him. Not with someone else, not distracted or distant, but focused on what they had, on what they built together. That knowledge settled deep in Hongjoong as he turned the corner toward the familiar building. 

He adjusted the strap of the bag on his shoulder and smiled to himself. It didn’t have much in it, just the typical nonsense he’d take to work, but there was also a beautiful rectangular paddle that would be sure to turn Seonghwa’s ass the prettiest shade of red. Hongjoong was going to tell him to, maybe this time he’d convince Seonghwa to let him take a few pictures. 

It felt good that there was no nervous buzz in his brain, or anxious rehearsing of what he was going to say or how he was going to ask. The only thing in his head was the quiet anticipation of seeing Seonghwa again. 

By the time he reached the large doors of the apartment Hongjoong was ready for the scene, and mostly ready to spend time with Seonghwa. It felt like the early days where he was just excited, but it didn’t have any of the nerves that he wouldn’t do a good job. Hongjoong knew he was going to walk in and give Seonghwa everything he wanted and craved. 

Hongjoong pressed the doorbell and there was a scrambling noise and a dull thud before the door was pulled open. He cocked his head to the side and his eyes went wide when he saw Seonghwa standing there looking slightly disheveled. 

“Are you okay?” Hongjoong walked in. 

“I fell when I was getting up.” Seonghwa reached up to fix his hair. 

“Getting up from where?” Hongjoong dropped his bag by the door. “I think you need a table or a hook here for my bag. It’ll be easier than the closet when I bring things over for our scenes.” 

“I can do that.” Seonghwa nodded. “And I was kneeling. I just lost my balance because I stood up to quickly.” 

“What?” Hongjoong looked at him surprised as his body went hot. “You kneel?” 

“When I’m waiting for you.” Seonghwa shrugged. 

“Why haven’t you told me that before?” Hongjoong looked at him amazed. 

“I didn’t think it mattered.” Seonghwa shrugged. “It’s just something I like to do.” 

“You’re so good all the time.” Hongjoong looked at him fondly. “Even when I don’t know.” 

Seonghwa gave him a bright smile, the kind where he almost looked like he was in pain. 

“Oh, you do want praise today.” Hongjoong laughed. 

Seonghwa nodded firmly. “Can we start?” 

“Are you okay with rope bondage tonight? It won’t be anything too intense. Just your hands in front of you.” Hongjoong shifted. “I practiced on San so I know what I’m doing.” 

“What do you mean you practiced on San?” Seonghwa’s hands went to his hips, and he worried his bottom lip with his teeth. 

“Last night.” Hongjoong looked around. “I wanted it to be a surprise for today so I didn’t mention it.” 

“I want to know if you're in sexual situations with other people.” Seonghwa paused. “I wasn’t when I was dating.” 

“Okay.” Hongjoong hung his head slightly. “I’m sorry. I thought you’d be excited.” 

“I am.” Seonghwa nodded. “I just don’t like thinking about you with other people. I know I can be distant sometimes, but I feel like if I saw you with someone else, I’d do something stupid.” 

Hongjoong nodded with a serious expression, “I completely understand. I wanted to destroy that vase of flowers, and I never even saw that guy. I had to call out of work all week because I thought you went and fell in love with someone.” 

Seonghwa laughed brightly. “Hongjoong I...” 

Hongjoong shook his head. “Can we do the scene?” 

“Right boundaries.” Seonghwa nodded. “Red is stop, yellow is slow down, green is good.” 

Against his better judgement Hongjoong closed the space between them and leaned in. The kiss was soft and hesitant at first. Seonghwa didn’t push forward but he didn’t pull back either. The moment stretched out and Hongjoong debated pulling away. 

Then Seonghwa reacted slowly and deliberately. His hand came up to rest against Hongjoong’s jaw, thumb brushing lightly along the edge of his chin like he was memorizing the shape of it. The kiss deepened, still unhurried but heavy with everything they were still waiting to say to each other. 

Hongjoong’s heart was a wild, uneven rhythm in his chest. Seonghwa’s kisses were always more than he could ever hope for. Someday he wanted sweet short ones like a casual peck in the morning before one of them left for work. Everything didn’t always need to be so much. 

When they finally broke apart, neither of them spoke. Seonghwa’s eyes were wide and unreadable, but Hongjoong knew he needed to start the scene or they’d never begin. 

“You’re confusing,” Seonghwa stated. “Sir.” 

“And you’re so good for me.” Hongjoong replied. “Strip. I want nothing on you. Then I’ll tie up your arms.” 

“Can you do behind my back?” Seonghwa questioned as he pulled off his soft lounge shirt. He folded it and looked at Hongjoong expectantly. 

“Yeah, I think so.” Hongjoong nodded. “Whatever you want.” 

“Thank you Sir.” Seonghwa nodded as he dropped his pants before he folded them. 

There was no lingerie underneath and Hongjoong had to hide his disappointment. Just because he wanted Seonghwa naked didn’t mean he didn’t also want to see him in a pretty pair of panties. Hongjoong turned around with a sigh and went to his bag. He quickly pulled out the rope and the safety scissors. With Seonghwa watching he set the scissors down on Seonghwa’s coffee table and looked at him expectantly. 

Seonghwa moved to stand still in front of Hongjoong, his breathing slow but steady. 

Hongjoong took the rope in his hands, running it once through his fingers to smooth out the tension. The fibers were warm from the heat of his palms. Seonghwa turned his head slightly, just enough that Hongjoong could see the faint curve of his profile and the small, deliberate nod that said I’m ready. 

“Hands,” Hongjoong said softly. 

Seonghwa drew his arms behind his back, wrists pressed together neatly. His skin looked impossibly golden against the pale tan of the rope. Hongjoong started with a bight, wrapping the first loop carefully, keeping the tension firm but not too firm. The rhythm of it calmed Hongjoong. Loop, pull, tighten, check. He could feel Seonghwa’s breath shift each time the rope slid over his skin, the way shoulders rose and fell told Hongjoong everything he needed to know. 

“Too tight?” Hongjoong murmured. 

Seonghwa shook his head. “No. It feels good.” 

Hongjoong’s fingers hesitated for a heartbeat before continuing, the motion was well practiced but it was still his first time. When he finished, he tested the knot, then pressed a hand between Seonghwa’s shoulder blades, grounding them both. 

Seonghwa exhaled shakily, the sound catching in his throat. 

Hongjoong swallowed hard. “Perfect,” he said quietly. “And I mean you Seonghwa. You look beautiful like this.” 

“Thank you Sir.”  

“But you’re not just beautiful are you?” Hongjoong hummed as he walked back to his bag to get the paddle out of it. “No, you’re strong and smart. You know what you want, and I’m lucky enough that you let me give it to you.” 

Seonghwa’s eyes went wide and glassy. 

“Don’t cry pretty boy.” Hongjoong cooed. “I can’t play with you if you cry.” 

Seonghwa sniffed and stood up straighter as Hongjoong came back with the long leather paddle. 

“I know I said no more gifts, but I got this just for you.” Hongjoong showed Seonghwa the paddle as he walked around the submissive. 

Hongjoong let his hands wander lower. His finger tips, and nails, traced every line of Seonghwa’s muscles and the curve of his rib bones like he was learning the shape of Seonghwa’s body from touch alone. The way Seonghwa subtly leaned into every touch was enough to drive Hongjoong crazy. He wanted more than the scratch of Hongjoong’s nails, but Hongjoong wasn’t willing to be rushed in that moment. 

He wanted Seonghwa to feel grounded, and he wanted Seonghwa to know that whatever Hongjoong decided to do next that he was still seen, safe and cared for. 

“So good for me,” Hongjoong murmured, his fingertips rubbing over the rough texture of the jute rope that bound Seonghwa’s arms together. “I don’t know how you manage to be so beautiful.” 

Hongjoong walked around to Seonghwa’s font. His eyes went right to Seonghwa’s pecs. 

“God you have great tits.” Hongjoong slapped his hand down against one of them, and then the other.  

He repeated the action a few times before he brought the paddle down across Seonghwa’s chest. He was more careful with the area than he needed to be but by the time he brought the paddle down a few more times he had increased his force. Hongjoong couldn’t help but enjoy the way Seonghwa cringed and did his best not to move back. Seonghwa just widened his stance and tensed his shoulders. 

“You take it so well.” Hongjoong smiled. “Even your cock is hard, but you need to relax.” Hongjoong tapped Seonghwa’s shoulders with the paddle. 

Seonghwa dropped them instantly and looked at Hongjoong with wet eyes. He wasn’t crying yet, but it was obvious that it wouldn’t take much. This scene wasn’t as emotional as the first time they had engaged in impact play. Hongjoong assumed that was because the tears came more from frustration than being overwhelmed. Seonghwa didn’t need control and focus right now, he needed to let go, and let the negative feelings bleed out of him. 

“Let me help you bend over the arm of the couch.” Hongjoong nodded over to it. 

He held onto the ropes that bound Seonghwa’s arms behind his back as the other man fell forward as gracefully as he could. Seonghwa’s stomach muscles tightened with the control it took not to fall, but Hongjoong would have never let that happen anyway. His fingers stayed looped through the rope and he was ready to tug upwards if needed, but that didn’t happen. 

Seonghwa was stretched out his face squished against the couch cushion and his legs long, and lean, stretched behind him. He was on his tip toes, but this time Hongjoong wanted him uncomfortable. It wouldn’t be long until his legs were trembling with strain. 

“The lines of your body are unreal,” Hongjoong breathed out. “I wish I could take a picture of you like this.” 

“You can Sir.” Seonghwa mumbled out. 

“I what?” Hongjoong’s eyes went wide and he did his best to hide his surprise. 

“I trust you.” Seonghwa answered. “You can take pictures.” 

Hongjoong scrambled to get his phone. He had never moved so fast in his entire life, and had somehow managed to not drop the device when his hands were shaking. Apparently Seonghwa did like pictures. He started simply with one of Seonghwa laid over the arm of the couch from the side, his skin contrasting beautifully with the cream white of the fabric. Then he took a close up of the way he tied Seonghwa’s hands to show Wooyoung later. After that he got a giddy idea and stood directly behind Seonghwa. 

He didn’t hesitate to take a picture of Seonghwa’s ass. There was barest hint of his smooth balls between his parted legs, and then the head of his hard cock below them. Hongjoong wanted to take it into his mouth, but that wasn’t the plan for the evening. He didn’t even have a plan for how he was going to get Seonghwa off. He just assumed it would happen somewhere along the way. 

When he was done Hongjoong tossed his phone past Seonghwa’s head. It bounced twice but stayed on the couch. “I’m going to start now.” 

“Green Sir.” Seonghwa said and stuck his ass out a little more. 

“How are you always so good?” Hongjoong slapped Seonghwa’s ass with his hand a few times until the skin had a pretty pink flush. 

Then without warning Hongjoong brought the paddle down and it met Seonghwa’s skin with a sound that was sharp in the quiet apartment. Seonghwa inhaled hard, a small sound escaping before he steadied himself again. He could take it. 

The next few strikes fell in a rhythm that was almost hypnotic. Each slap sent a pulse through Hongjoong’s chest. He felt electric and it had nothing to do with the dominance he was displaying. No, it was about how much he wanted to take care of Seonghwa, how much he wanted to give him the world. 

He watched Seonghwa closely, the way he trembled, he way he couldn’t seem to stay still. It was beautiful how he moved. This wasn’t a scene about control, no it was about surrender and how that could only happen when you saw someone else so completely. 

Just like with the cane Hongjoong kept a close eye on Seonghwa’s skin and the different shades of red. He’d strike down the back of Seonghwa’s thighs to give his ass a break before he went back up to the plush skin.  

“You’re taking it so well for me.” Hongjoong coached. “So good Seonghwa.” 

In an unplanned move, before Seonghwa’s legs could give out, Hongjoong grabbed the rope binding Seonghwa’s arms and managed to manhandle him onto the floor. Seonghwa gave him a dazed open mouthed expression. How were his eyes so big and trusting? 

Hongjoong made sure Seonghwa’s shoulders hit the ground gently before he went back to Seonghwa’s ass. They were almost done, he didn’t want to break the skin, and he didn’t want any marks that would last too long. 

When Hongjoong finally stilled the paddle, he let it drop to the floor with a dull thud. He rested his palm against Seonghwa’s upper back back, tracing small circles until the other man’s breathing evened out. 

“Good,” Hongjoong whispered.  

Seonghwa turned his head slightly, eyes closed, a faint smile pulling at his lips. “Thank you Sir,” he breathed. 

The words hit Hongjoong harder than they should have. They were laced with gratitude, trust, and something that could be mislabeled as love if Hongjoong was feeling delusional enough. 

“Let me untie you,” Hongjoong pulled on the rope. 

“No, I don’t want to be done.” Seonghwa said panicked. 

“We’re only done with this part.” Hongjoong said as he pulled the rope off Seonghwa’s arms. He had just lied, he didn’t have anything else planned. He’d have to improvise. “Hold on I want a picture of the imprints from the rope.” 

Hongjoong rushed back to his phone and took a few quick pictures before he helped Seonghwa to a standing position. Seonghwa’s arousal was hard to miss and Hongjoong almost felt guilty for it. Seonghwa had been perfect. He deserved to get off. 

“Can we go to the bedroom?” 

Hongjoong’s stomach twisted into a knot. “Yes.” 

“I’m going to ride you.” Seonghwa said firmly and confidently. 

It didn’t feel like it was part of the scene, but who was Hongjoong to say no to that offer. 

“You need to get naked.” Seonghwa crossed his arms and pouted the second they were in his bedroom. 

Hongjoong’s eyebrows went up, “this is still a scene Seonghwa don’t get to brave.” 

No, this wasn’t really part of their scene anymore. Could fucking be considered aftercare? He’d have to ask Wooyoung. 

“Please get naked Sir.” Seonghwa smirked. “So, I can sit on your cock.” 

Hongjoong reached out one of his hands and took Seonghwa’s cheeks between his fingers. He squeezed till Seonghwa’s lips were pursed and his eyes were wide with surprise. 

“Be good bunny or you’re not getting your treat for being so good earlier.” Hongjoong dropped his hand. 

“Yes Sir, sorry Sir.” Seonghwa hung his head. “Can I strip you Sir?” 

Hongjoong wanted to laugh at the excessive use of Sir, but kept it in. “You can.” 

Seonghwa moved closer, hesitant at first, but his eyes never left Hongjoong’s. There was a flicker of intent there that left Hongjoong wondering what he had really agreed to. Seonghwa’s hands lifted, his fingers brushed against the hem of Hongjoong’s shirt before he paused, silently asking for permission. 

Hongjoong gave him a small nod, that was all it took. 

Seonghwa’s fingers slipped beneath the fabric. They were slow and careful, pushing the shirt upward inch by inch. His knuckles grazed skin, tracing along the ridges of Hongjoong’s ribs as he pushed the fabric upwards. Hongjoong’s breath hitched, but he didn’t move. 

When the shirt was gone, Seonghwa set it aside neatly, the same way he always did with every other article of clothing. Then his hands returned, skimming lower now, to the button of Hongjoong’s pants. His movements were slower here, more deliberate, more teasing. 

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong said as a quiet warning. 

“Sorry Sir,” Seonghwa whispered back. His eyes lifted, meeting Hongjoong’s as he eased the zipper down. “I just want to take care of you for a little while tonight.” 

Hongjoong swallowed hard, the words settled somewhere deep inside of his chest. Seonghwa’s touch lingered at his hips, and for a moment it felt like every boundary between them had blurred. There were supposed to be boundaries now to protect his heart. Had he even ever tried to keep them in place the last few days? 

For a second, neither of them moved. Then Seonghwa leaned down and in so that his forehead rested against Hongjoong’s. His hands slid up, framing Hongjoong’s face before moving down again, tracing over his shoulders, across his chest, down his stomach like he just wanted to touch Hongjoong for the sake of it. 

Seonghwa eased the fabric down Hongjoong’s hips as slowly as he could. When the pants dropped further down Hongjoong’s thighs, Seonghwa sank lower, his hands smoothing down the backs of Hongjoong’s thighs as he guided the fabric down to the floor. His touch lingered, but Hongjoong didn’t want to correct the action, not when Seonghwa’s fingers were curled into the waist band of his briefs. 

When they were pulled down his cock slapped up against his stomach, shiny at the tip. He didn’t miss the way Seonghwa licked over his lips at the sight of it, but he didn’t do more. His hands rested just above Hongjoong’s knees. 

Hongjoong reached out, his fingers brushing along Seonghwa’s jaw. He used his fingers to tilt Seonghwa’s chin upward forcing eye contact. “You don’t have to take care of me. I can just...” he murmured. 

“I want to,” Seonghwa whispered. His voice was quiet but certain. 

Seonghwa stood again, until they were eye to eye, the gap in their height somehow not as noticeable. They were so close that Hongjoong could feel Seonghwa’s breath against his lips. 

Hongjoong exhaled. “Boundaries,” he said softly and mostly to himself. 

Seonghwa’s lips quirked just barely, “respectfully, Sir, fuck your boundaries.” 

Seonghwa’s lips crashed into his and Hongjoong met him with the same urgency. He caught Seonghwa’s lower lip between his teeth before he deepened the kiss. It wasn’t careful like so many of their kisses had been it was a wild collision more than anything else. Their hands found each other’s bodies instinctively, Seonghwa gripped the back of Hongjoong’s neck, and Hongjoong’s fingers dug into his waist dangerously. 

Seonghwa made a soft sound against Hongjoong’s mouth that was somewhere between a sigh and a groan, and it sent a shiver down Hongjoong’s spine. He pushed forward until Seonghwa’s legs hit the bed and his body fell backwards onto it. 

Hongjoong was on him in an instant, kissing down his neck until he remembered how Seonghwa wanted to end the night. With a wicked grin he flopped onto his back and looked at Seonghwa expectantly. 

Seonghwa scrambled first to his bedside draw for the lube and then to Hongjoong’s feet. He leaned forward and uncapped the lube before it let it dribble down over Hongjoong’s cock. He used his hand to spread it over Hongjoong’s hot skin before he brought the same hand between his legs. 

“Didn’t I tell you not to prep yourself anymore?” Hongjoong frowned as he sat up on his shoulders. 

“I really don’t give a fuck about that right now.” Seonghwa shook his head. “Sir.” 

“If you don’t stop saying it like that I’m walking away.” Hongjoong threatened, and Seonghwa laughed at him as he crawled further up his legs until he was in Hongjoong’s lap. 

It was completely unspoken, but very obvious that they weren’t really in scene anymore. It had ended somewhere after the kiss, but Hongjoong wasn’t sure exactly when. Honestly, he should have stopped what they were doing, not because they didn’t want it or because the consent was blurry, but because he did want boundaries. Hongjoong didn’t want to be hurt again. 

Then again how was he supposed to say no to Seonghwa? 

Hongjoong watched Seonghwa’s face as he fingered himself, and his jaw dropped when Seonghwa turned around. His ass was an angry red and Hongjoong couldn’t help himself, he slapped each cheek and was rewarded with a sharp gasp from Seonghwa who just leaned further forward. 

“Put it in,” Seonghwa shifted his hips. “Please. I’ll do all the work, just put it in.” 

“Okay bunny,” Hongjoong said as evenly as he could manage to. 

He grabbed his cock and lined it up with Seonghwa’s hole. The head slipped past it a few times before it finally caught and he could push in. Seonghwa took him in beautifully and started to bounce back and forward almost instantly. 

Hongjoong brought his hand down so his fingers could trace over where their bodies were connected. Seonghwa was stretched so tight around him, but that didn’t stop a delicious idea from popping into his head. Hongjoong pressed against his cock with two fingers until they finally slid into Seonghwa’s body. 

The cry Seonghwa let out was instant and Hongjoong was ready to stop and remove his fingers, but Seonghwa hadn’t stopped pushing his hips back. 

“What a greedy little hole,” Hongjoong spat out. “You just need to be stuffed full don’t you.” 

“Yes.” Seonghwa cried out. “Please please please.” 

Hongjoong didn’t know what Seonghwa was asking for. It could have been for more, or to just cum. “Turn around for me bunny.” 

Hongjoong removed his fingers and Seonghwa sat up straight slowly before he turned his body to the side. He then shifted again to face the front without Hongjoong’s cock ever leaving his body. When Hongjoong could finally see Seonghwa he had a cute little annoyed expression on his face. Clearly please didn’t mean stop and move. 

“I just want to see your face.” Hongjoong reached out with his clean hand to touch Seonghwa’s face. “And touch your cock.” And he used his dirty hand on Seonghwa’s cock. 

“That’s good.” Seonghwa nodded as he rolled his hips forward. “I’m so close Joong.” 

The use of the nickname crashed through Hongjoong. He couldn’t pretend they were still in scene if Seonghwa wasn’t even calling him Sir anymore. 

“Keep moving bunny. I’ll fill you up.” Hongjoong coached as the hand that was on Seonghwa’s face dropped to his hips to help guide his motions. 

“With babies?” Seonghwa asked innocently. 

“Is that what you want?” Hongjoong thrust his hips upwards. “You want me to knock you up?” 

“Yes.” Seonghwa cried out. 

“You want me to stay so deep that it’ll have to catch?” Hongjoong kept rambling. “Have you leaking my cum for days?” 

“Oh fuck Hongjoong.” Seonghwa pushed his hips down to meet Hongjoong’s sloppy thrusts. “Cum in me. Please. Don’t pull out. Stay in.” 

Hongjoong couldn’t ignore that. Seonghwa was his, and he was going to make sure it stayed that way. With a little more effort than he would have liked Hongjoong surged forward and flipped them over. The surprise gasp Seonghwa let out wasn’t going to distract him. He put his hands under Seonghwa’s knees and pushed his legs back as he continued to fuck into Seonghwa’s body. 

“You’re so deep, fuck.” Seonghwa moaned. 

“I’m going to cum so deep baby,” Hongjoong replied through gritted teeth. He wanted Seonghwa to cum first but that didn’t seem like it was going to happen without some help. “Touch yourself.” 

Seonghwa moved a shaking hand down to grip his cock. It was obvious that he was too far gone to really do much, but Hongjoong hoped it was enough to push him over the edge. Thankfully it was. Moments after Seonghwa touched himself he came. Hongjoong watched as ribbons of white painted Seonghwa’s stomach before he pressed forward and came as deeply inside of Seonghwa as he could. 

Of course Seonghwa had a breeding kink. 

“Stay inside.” Seonghwa demanded as he wrapped his legs around Hongjoong. 

“Shower.” Hongjoong tapped the side of Seonghwa’s ass. “And I need to look at where I spanked you.” 

“We’re staying right here.” Seonghwa demanded. “Like this, forever.” 

Hongjoong let out a loud laugh, “I think if I got up I could carry us to the bathroom.” 

“But you’re not getting up.” Seonghwa smiled to himself. 

“You’re so sweaty baby, you don’t want to have to wash your bedding,” Hongjoong commented as he placed a hand on Seonghwa’s sweaty chest. 

“I always get sweaty,” Seonghwa replied. “This isn’t new, and I wash my beddin every Friday night anyway.” 

“Of course you do.” Hongjoong bent down and gave him a sweet little kiss. “Now let me go.” 

“I’ll let you go under one condition.” Seonghwa grinned. 

Hongjoong’s nerves spiked, “and what’s that?” 

“You have to stay, and be here when I wake up.” Seonghwa nodded and dropped his legs. 

“You want me to stay?” Hongjoong swallowed air as his heartrate picked back up. 

“Yes, and do better than last time. I want to wake up with you here,” Seonghwa smiled. “I want to make you breakfast before you leave.” 

“That’s not boundaries.” Hongjoong shook his head. “That’s the opposite of boundaries.” 

“And I said fuck your boundaries.” Seonghwa reminded him. “But if you really want to go you can.” 

“I’ll stay.” Hongjoong nodded. 

Fuck his boundaries. 

** 

Hongjoong woke slowly because he didn’t want to give up on one of the best sleeps he had in years. Seonghwa’s bedroom was warm, faintly scented with cologne and whatever detergent he used, and it only added to the cozy feeling in the room. He refused to be anxious about the moment, Seonghwa wanted him here, even if he wasn’t currently in the bed with Hongjoong. 

The other side of the bed was empty but it still looked slept in. The blankets were still thrown back, the sheets wrinkled, and the pillow still held a faint indentation from where Seonghwa’s head had been. Hongjoong turned toward it and reached out to drag his fingers over the cooled fabric. His body ached in the most satisfied way from the sex they had the night before. 

There was a sound in the distance, a clanking pan, that let him know just where Seonghwa was. True to his word Hongjoong had stayed and now Seonghwa was making him breakfast. He checked his phone, which only had twenty percent of it’s battery life out of habit before he got out of the bed. 

Hongjoong padded down the hallway and was surprised when he looked out the big windows in Seonghwa’s living room to see that it was raining. It was going to make it so much harder to leave. 

“Gyeran bap and kimchi jeon, because it’s raining,” Seonghwa said softly as he came into view holding two bowls. “I was about to wake you up.” 

“With kisses?” Hongjoong smiled at him. 

“Not when you have morning breath and I don’t have a spare toothbrush.” Seonghwa shook his head. “I’ll give you one on the cheek before you leave.” 

“Should we get me one?” Hongjoong asked dumbly but it made Seonghwa pause. 

“I think you need to figure out your boundaries thing first.” Seonghwa commented evenly. “Now come eat. I’d have flowers on the table, but my Dom thought it would be inappropriate to get me some this week.” Seonghwa said as he sat down. 

“It would have been,” Hongjoong rolled his eyes. “Let’s not fight.” 

“We aren’t fighting.” Seonghwa laughed. “Now eat.” 

Hongjoong shoved a spoonful of food into his mouth and let out a happy groan. Seonghwa smiled at him and brought his own spoon to his mouth. Hongjoong watched as Seonghwa took a big enough bite that his cheeks puffed out while he chewed. It was adorable. If he could choose Hongjoong would have stayed in that moment forever. 

“What other domestic things do you do? I mean other than cleaning?” Hongjoong looked at him seriously. 

“I like to clean,” Seonghwa shrugged. “That’s why I like to pick up after scenes. It’s relaxing.” 

“Can you just,” Hongjoong made a face at himself. “Tell me about you?” 

“What about me?” Seonghwa looked at him seriously. 

“Anything you want to tell me.” Hongjoong nodded. “I don’t know anything about you, which is weird because I bet I know more about you than a lot of people do.” 

Seonghwa nodded and set down his chopsticks, “okay. I get it. My birthday is April 3rd. My parents are still alive and together. They live by the ocean with two small birds. I have an older brother who’s married and thankfully provided my mother with grandchildren.” Seonghwa paused to laugh before he got more serious. “My mother, brother, and sister in law are fine with me being gay, my dad tries not to think about it, but he was never rude to my husband. I love the ocean, I think it’s where I’m the most happy. Ocean blue is my favorite color. I went to school for business, but worked my way up to my current position. When I got divorced my ex went scorched earth before he left the country so San and Wooyoung are the only real friends I have left. He treated me all the ways I don’t want men to treat me now.” 

Hongjoong nodded and ate quietly while Seonghwa spoke. He could imagine him golden and smiling by the ocean. Maybe someday the friend group could take a trip and Hongjoong would get the chance to see Seonghwa at his happiest. 

“Now what about you?” Seonghwa leaned in. “I just know about your job, nothing else.” 

“There isn’t much to me.” Hongjoong shrugged. “Honestly.” 

“Don’t be so secretive.” Seonghwa shook his head. “The only things I know about you are the things Yeosang said the first, and only time I’ve seen him in person.” 

“My birthday is November 7th. I used to run a lot, I did races but I don’t really have the time anymore. I traveled a lot when I was younger to, I miss that. There was a time I was super into fashion too. I think I lost a lot of myself when I got into my last relationship and when it ended I never got back to who I was. I think food is annoying, I can’t cook, but I like your cooking.” He made a show of eating some of the food Seonghwa had served him. “I don’t really talk to my family, just my brother but he’s a few hours away so I don’t see him a lot. My parents weren’t okay with it when I dated a man, but I didn’t want to hide who I was. You know about work, that’s really all that’s interesting about me.” 

“Do you want a family?” Seonghwa blinked at him. “I don’t think I ever asked, but you’re so good with the twins it’s hard to imagine that you wouldn’t want that.” 

“I do,” Hongjoong nodded. “I didn’t know I did until I met you, but you made me really think about it, and it’s something I really want.” 

“I made you want kids?” Seonghwa asked slowly and purposefully. 

“Yes.” Hongjoong nodded, too tired to lie about it. 

Of course Seonghwa made him want kids. How would he not want everything that life could offer if Seonghwa was there with him. 

“I don’t want to say too much over breakfast, maybe on Wednesday, but that means a lot.” Seonghwa smiled. “I’m sorry about your family though. I’d be happy to loan out my parents. My mom is great. When I have kids she’s not going to leave them or my partner alone. You know how parents can be, she’s been bullying me a lot lately because I’m old and she’s old.” 

Hongjoong laughed, “thankfully I don’t have anyone in my life telling me I’ll die alone if I don’t find someone soon.” 

“But you found someone right?” Seonghwa blinked at him. 

Hongjoong’s body went hot, and it felt like his heart was going to beat through his ribcage and burst out of his chest. Seonghwa knew? He had been that obvious? It didn’t matter. Right now, it felt like everything was laid out in front of them, including their feelings. Hongjoong wanted boundaries but that wasn’t going to happen. He was going to hand deliver flowers on Wednesday, and hope Seonghwa would say the words he never could bring himself to. 

“Yeah, I did,” Hongjoong nodded and avoided eye contact. 

Why couldn’t he just be brave for once? 

“Well, that’s good to hear,” Seonghwa gave him a bright smile. “I know you want to give me everything or whatever, but I want you happy and taken care of to Hongjoong, it’s what you deserve.” 

Hongjoong felt his cheeks get warmer, “I don’t even know what to say to that.” 

“Thank you,” Seonghwa grinned. “Or, thank you for taking care of me Seonghwa. Something like that.” 

Hongjoong let out a dry laugh, “I don’t know. It’s more like thank you for making my dreams come true.” Seonghwa’s happy face dropped into a more surprised expression. “I never thought I’d have a submissive and it would work out this well.” 

“That’s all I am?” Seonghwa’s surprised expression dropped further into a pout. 

Hongjoong, too tired to hide his feelings, rolled his eyes. “You know that’s not all you are to me.” 

Just like that Seonghwa’s face went back to delighted. “Bring me flowers on Wednesday.” 

“Hey!” Hongjoong sat up. “Don’t ruin my surprise.” 

“And a treat,” Seonghwa added with a pout. “I miss my treats. And the whole office got used to the flowers, even that woman who’s kid you teach.” 

Hongjoong laughed at the jealous tone, “does your office know you like men?” 

“Yes,” Seonghwa nodded. “It’s an upside of working in cosmetics and skin care, no one cares about that stuff.” 

Hongjoong felt his face heat up again. There was no way that the entire office didn’t think that their meetings were actually dates. That wasn’t all they were doing in the room, but no one needed to know those details. 

He wondered if there was gossip between the parents about him now that one of his student’s mothers knew he was meeting with Seonghwa. Nothing had come up, and there were no lingering looks, but you never knew. Either way, nothing had changed for him, so it didn’t seem to matter much if one student’s mother knew his sexuality. 

“I should get going,” Hongjoong pushed his chair back. “Yunho and Mingi worry when I stay out too long.” 

“They’re like your parents.” Seonghwa giggled as he stood. 

“We are an extremely dysfunctional family,” Hongjoong laughed. “But I love them.” 

“I wish you could stay longer,” Seonghwa sighed. 

“You’re not sick of me yet?” Hongjoong smiled as he moved towards the door.  

“How could I be sick of you?” Seonghwa rushed to get to the door first and bent to grab Hongjoong’s shoes.  

Hongjoong let out an airy laugh at the action. He could vividly imagine that this was his everyday with Seonghwa. He wanted casual touches and easy moments. Hongjoong wanted to slide his hand across Seonghwa’s lower back as they hugged goodbye. He wanted to kiss Seonghwa’s cheek after he kissed his lips and maybe the tip of his nose. Someday he hoped that things would feel simple between them. 

It was obvious that something had changed. There was a shift the moment Seonghwa admitted he wasn’t dating anymore. The air between them softened immediately but now there was a charge to it that wasn’t there before. It was like they were both waiting for the other to make the first move. 

The words had made Hongjoong feel brave in a way that he hadn’t felt before with Seonghwa. He didn’t feel resigned to the singular fate of everything ending, and he didn’t feel pressured to spill his guts and tell Seonghwa exactly how he felt. There was a new hope that had settled in his chest, it was so much less frantic than it was before, but it was still heavy. 

He had been let down before. It wasn’t that Seonghwa was cruel, he wasn’t heartless, it was so obvious now that he was scared to. Their timing had been off, they were both scared, and neither could admit to how they really felt. 

Now, watching Seonghwa put his shoes on, felt like it had an additional weight to it. It was something that Seonghwa wanted, and it was progress, but there was also a risk to feeling this secure. Hongjoong wanted to believe that this was the start of something real between them, he just wasn’t sure if he could handle the crash of being wrong again. 

“We need more acts of service,” Seonghwa said as he stood up. “I might not be able to get down and do your shoes forever. I’m old.” 

Hongjoong laughed so the use of the word forever didn’t burn right through him. 

“Anything you want,” Hongjoong smiled. “But I really need to go.” 

“I know,” Seonghwa sighed. “Someday you should babysit with me. It could be fun.” 

“It sounds loud.” Hongjoong shrugged. 

“You literally teach small children,” Seonghwa’s hands went to his hips. “I think you can handle the twins.” 

“Exactly maybe I need some quiet.” Hongjoong shifted because he didn’t want to leave either. 

What would San and Wooyoung think if they showed up together? 

“I guess I’ll let you go home to your quiet then.” Seonghwa shifted. “I’ll see you on Wednesday?” 

“Of course.” Hongjoong nodded. 

Were they supposed to kiss goodbye? Was there any other way to end the morning? 

Questions flickered through Hongjoong’s mind as he lingered by the door, close enough to Seonghwa to feel the warmth coming off his body. Seonghwa had a small and careful smile on his face when his eyes dropped to Hongjoong’s mouth before they trailed up his face to meet his eyes. 

That was all the permission that Hongjoong needed. 

He leaned in, slow enough for Seonghwa to pull away if he wanted to. Their lips met softly but firmly, just once. It was a quick brush of warmth that felt more like something was starting than ending. 

When they pulled apart, Seonghwa’s breath caught in his throat, and Hongjoong forced a small smile before stepping back. He opened the door with a sigh. 

“Bye,” Hongjoong murmured, voice low. 

Seonghwa nodded, still standing in the doorway as Hongjoong walked down the hall. The ghost of their soft kiss lingered on his lips the entire walk home. 

** 

“I’m not going out.” Hongjoong stood with his arms crossed looking at Yeosang, Mingi and Yunho. “I’m not a club kind of a guy.” 

“But you are a wallow kind of a guy and we’re trying to avoid that.” Mingi pointed out. 

“I don’t need to wallow, he’s not dating and things are fine.” Hongjoong frowned. 

“But you’re still not together,” Yunho pointed out. “This isn’t for you to meet someone it’s for you to get drunk and have fun.” 

“You just want me to buy you drinks.” Hongjoong accused them. 

“Yes, but also we want you to come out and hang out with Jongho and us,” Yeosang narrowed his eyes. 

“Don’t pull that out.” Hongjoong pointed at him. 

“He hasn’t asked me to be serious yet.” Yeosang frowned. 

“I told him to,” Hongjoong nearly yelled. “That’s not on me. I don’t need to be at a club for him to ask you to go steady or whatever.” 

“Maybe it’ll be a good example for his boss.” Mingi wiggled his eyebrows. 

“This is why I’m not leaving the house with any of you.” Hongjoong crossed his arms and widened his stance. 

“Jongho likes you, he told me so,” Yeosang started. 

“That’s a lie,” Hongjoong shook his head. “I know him he did not say that.” 

“He did in a way,” Yeosang shrugged. “Please for me?” 

“I don’t want to go out and watch you guys all grind with the loves of your lives while I drink alone.” Hongjoong rolled his eyes. “Don’t make me do that.” 

“Find someone of your own to grind with.” Yunho shrugged. “You’re not dating Seonghwa it’s not like it’s cheating or anything.” 

Hongjoong put his head in his hands for a moment before he looked back up, “that’s not the issue. I’m trying to find excuses because I just don’t want to go.” 

Yeosang let out a chirp of a laugh. “Okay well no one cares about that go change into something nice.” He shoved Hongjoong towards his room. 

It was in that moment that Hongjoong knew he had lost. He wasn’t completely bothered by it, he was glad that his friends wanted to include him even if clubs and bars weren’t his thing. Some battles weren’t meant to be won and this was one of them. He could find a way to make himself enjoy the night. 

All he needed was to go out for a little bit, get a drink or two, maybe talk to a stranger or dance with Yeosang to mess with Jongho and then he could head home. His friends would likely forget he was even there by the end of the night once they had paired off for the evening. All he’d need to do was send a quick message in their chat so no one worried about him. 

It was a simple plan. Just a few drinks, maybe some fun, and then he’d be home by midnight. No drama, and none of the heaviness of the last few weeks. It was just a night out to take the edge off. 

Hongjoong pulled clothes on that he knew would be good enough for a night out. It was nothing special but he didn’t want to stand out in anyway, he hardly wanted to exist in that setting. When he walked back out Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile at his friends huddled in the living room with Seonghwa’s gifts laid out around them. 

“Come here, we need to make you pretty,” Yeosang pointed next to him. 

He went without argument and settled on the floor next to his friend. 

“I’m not already pretty?” Hongjoong’s lips turned down even more into a pout. 

“You’re very pretty, this is why an extremely attractive man likes you.” Yeosang started to put some glittery eyeshadow on Hongjoong’s eyes. 

The memory of Seonghwa doing his make up popped into Hongjoong’s mind. It was a soft memory that was blurred around the edges, he didn’t even know if he was remembering all the details correctly. 

They were on the bed, Seonghwa perched on his lap, the weight of him light and grounding but maddening at the same time because Hongjoong was determined not to make that night about sex. The air smelled like it did now with the soft perfume of the cosmetics brand. 

“Oh we lost him.” Yunho laughed. 

“What?” Hongjoong looked sideways as much as he could. 

“Mingi asked if you wanted to pregame.” Yunho pointed out. 

Hongjoong moved his head this time earning a squeak of protest from Yeosang. He saw Mingi in the kitchen holding up a bottle. “No, I’m good I’ll just have a few drinks at the bar. Once you guys are drunk enough I’m going to leave anyway.” 

“So social,” Yeosang rolled his eyes. “Turn your head I’m almost done.” 

Hongjoong obediently moved his head back. 

Time slipped by after Yeosang was done with Hongjoong’s make up. They were the first two ready and Yeosang settled against the kitchen counter while Mingi tried on three different shirts. It was silly and pointless because Yunho was right there, and the shirt was just going to end up on the floor at the end of the night anyway. 

Hongjoong was going to have to remember to sleep with his headphones on. 

Yunho stood by the mirror in their entryway and fixed his hair with one hand while he clutched his drink with the other one. 

The apartment was filled with loud playful banter that always ended in bursts of giggles. Mingi teased Hongjoong about being underdressed while Yeosang insisted that they wouldn’t even get into the club because of how ugly Yunho’s sneakers were. Yunho flipped him off with a smile, but changed his shoes anyway. It was completely comfortable and the kind of chaos that made Hongjoong that much more fond of his friends. 

Wooyoung and San would easily slide into the group, and Hongjoong could stand to the side and watch Seonghwa interact and joke around with everyone.  

The taxi was already there by the time they made it down to the apartment lobby. They piled into the car, everyone in their designated seats. Hongjoong upfront, Yeosang squished against the door in the back with Mingi in the middle and Yunho against the other door. Hongjoong had offered so many times to switch things up because he was smaller than Yeosang, but they never too him up on the offer. They were likely anxious about how awkward the front seat could be. 

The ride was short, but loud, and likely annoying to their driver who just turned up the music when requested to with a small, resigned smile. When they stepped out in car, in front of the club, the bass from inside was already pulsing through the pavement, and everything in Hongjoong wanted to turn around and not walk through those doors. 

He was dragged in, and noticed Yeosang glued to his phone. 

“I have to find Jongho.” Yeosang lifted his head and yelled over the music. 

Hongjoong sighed and reached out to grab Yeosang’s head and turn it to the side where his soon to be boyfriend was already looking for him near the entrance. Yeosang spotted him and left without a word. 

Yunho and Mingi were already gone. 

Hongjoong headed to the bar with another sigh. Just a few hours and he could go. 

He ended up settled there, leaning back against the bar, just watching the crowd move. There were people there just to have fun, but there were men and women grinding on each other with intent. It was the most popular gay bar in the city, somewhere that was safe for everyone no matter who they were attracted to. There were even a few groups of people dancing together, and a few more making out in dark corners. Hongjoong was happy to people watch while he nursed his drink until his eyes caught on a familiar form. 

There was San, pink and happy swaying more than dancing in the crowd. Hongjoong straightened, his legs eager to take him over to his new friend, but he didn’t want to ruin anything. He didn’t know what San and Wooyoung did on their Saturday dates. They could have been at the clube trying to pick someone up and Hongjoong didn’t want to ruin that. 

His eyes scanned for Wooyoung, and he saw San’s beaming smile before he saw Wooyoung slink up to his husband. They kissed, messy and hot, before Wooyoung’s big hands went to San’s hips. They settled there and he guided San’s movements. 

Hongjoong finally pushed his body off the bar. He couldn’t let the night go without saying hi, and maybe they’d dance with him. After the other night he wouldn’t pass up the opportunity to have his body pressed against San’s. 

Then, a platinum blonde head caught his eyes. 

Hongjoong was cursed. His stomach dropped as he took in Seonghwa with some man flush against his back, hands on Seonghwa’s waist, and hips grinding into Seonghwa’s ass. They weren’t even dancing, it was just an obscene display that was likely going to lead to something else. 

Seonghwa’s tan skin was tinged pink, so he had been drinking, but that was no excuse. It felt like they were finally getting somewhere, and now Seonghwa was out practically getting fucked on a dance floor? 

Finally unwilling to back down and get lost in his own sad thoughts, Hongjoong changed his course and stomped towards Seonghwa. The thump of the bass added to the way his heartrate had already picked up. He wasn’t thinking he was just moving. 

When he reached Seonghwa, Hongjoong’s hand found his submissive’s arm. Hongjoong’s fingers curled tightly around his forearm as he pulled him away from the other man in one jerky motion with way more force than he meant to. 

Seonghwa turned, started at first, his eyes so unbelievably wide in the dim light. The shock melted quickly as he realized it was just Hongjoong. Seonghwa’s lips curved into a slow lazy smile, his actions clearly dulled from drinking. 

Without hesitation, Seonghwa wrapped his arms around Hongjoong’s shoulders. He leaned down and pressed the length of his body against Hongjoong’s and leaned his weight into him. The moment was easy and almost possessive. It made some of the heaviness in Hongjoong’s chest get lighter. He couldn’t help but wrap an arm around Seonghwa’s waist. 

The other man backed down without question. 

Seonghwa gave Hongjoong another lazy smile as he rocked his hips forward against Hongjoong. Then the music changed to something deeper and slower as Seonghwa adjusted himself slightly so that they were still pressed together at the hips but their chests were separated. 

Seonghwa’s hands slid up Hongjoong’s chest over the fabric of his shirt. His eyes were begging Hongjoong to make a move, and Hongjoong could never say no to Seonghwa. He brought his other hand to rest on Seonghwa’s hips and guided them into a slow swaying motion. There was no space between them as Seonghwa leaned forward and kissed him. 

The kiss was too brief for Hongjoong’s liking, but it was clear that Seonghwa was in the mood to be a tease. He turned in Hongjoong’s arms so that his back was against Hongjoong’s chest. Hongjoong’s hands tightened on his hips and dragged Seonghwa closer. The crowd around them felt like it wasn’t even there as Hongjoong felt himself start to harden. This was a dangerous game, and everything in that moment felt like a dream. 

It wasn’t just dancing and Hongjoong knew that. This was Seonghwa asking for more, and Hongjoong had to decide if he was going to indulge his pretty bunny or not. 

Seonghwa leaned his head back and rested it on Hongjoong’s shoulder, and Hongjoong decided to make a poor decision. Hongjoong leaned his head over until his lips were brushing against Seonghwa’s ear. 

“Bathroom?” Hongjoong said louder than a whisper but still not yelling. 

Seonghwa didn’t react for a moment. Then he moved forward his hand over one of Hongjoong’s as he separated their bodies. Before he knew it Hongjoong was being pulled through the crowd. They passed Wooyoung at one point who was only smirking at them. 

Of course it was a set up. 

The bathroom was quiet but dark, and Hongjoong was thankful that there were no harsh fluorescent lights. There were a few men standing at the urinals, but they didn’t even glance at Seonghwa and Hongjoong as the two of them entered into the furthest stall from the door together. 

Seonghwa pulled him in before he pushed Hongjoong back against the door and kissed him again. This time it was deeper and Seonghwa went at it all tongue and teeth. Hongjoong knew his lips would be raw the next day, but he didn’t care he kissed Seonghwa back with the same intensity. 

“You need to fuck me,” Seonghwa murmured into Hongjoong’s ear. “Please Sir, Hongjoong I need your cock. You feel so hard.” 

Hongjoong swallowed, “we don’t have lube.” 

“Oh,” Seonghwa took a step back as he grabbed Hongjoong’s hand. He clearly didn’t take the answer as a no. 

Hongjoong watched in horny panic as Seonghwa brought his hand closer to his mouth. Spit slipped past Seonghwa’s lips and down into the palm of his hand as Seonghwa’s big eyes looked up and locked with his. 

Hongjoong had never been so hard in his entire life. 

“That’s enough for you?” Hongjoong questioned. 

“I’m not going to break.” Seonghwa pawed at Hongjoong’s pants, uncoordinated but determined. 

Hongjoong’s cock was out before he knew what was happening and he reached down to cover it in Seonghwa’s spit. Seonghwa had his own pants pulled down over his ass as he turned to face the toilet. His hands were pressed against the wall as he bent at the waist and pushed his ass out. 

This needed to be quick and dirty. 

Hongjoong didn’t waste anytime, one hand went to Seonghwa’s hip as the other guided his cock into Seonghwa’s tight hole. The spit wasn’t quiet enough, but it smoothed the harsh slide into Seonghwa’s body just enough. Seonghwa hissed and let out a low but too loud moan. 

Without really thinking about what he was doing Hongjoong leaned forward and put one of his hands over Seonghwa’s mouth to keep him quiet. It was obvious what they were doing, but he didn’t want to broadcast it loudly to everyone that happened to walk into the bathroom. 

Fucking turned into Hongjoong griding up into Seonghwa’s body. He was so hot and tight that it was hard to not get lost in the feeling, but Hongjoong didn’t want to hurt Seonghwa by fucking him raw and dry. His lips were glued to Seonghwa’s shoulder and he bit down periodically soaking the fabric of Seonghwa's shirt, and leaving angry teeth marks as he went. It was possessive, but Seonghwa was his, so it didn’t matter. 

When the pressure finally built up, Hongjoong let himself cum. Then, he pushed through the over stimulation and fucked into Seonghwa roughly using his own cum to make the slide easier. His hand, that wasn’t around Seonghwa’s mouth, slid forward to wrap around Seonghwa’s cock. 

Hongjoong’s thighs slapped against Seonghwa’s ass roughly, and there was no way to hide what they were doing now. The sound was echoing off the tile around them, but Hongjoong didn’t care. His only focus was staying hard long enough to make Seonghwa cum. 

Thankfully Seonghwa came seconds later covering the wall with his cum. 

Hongjoong dropped both of his hands and draped himself over Seonghwa’s back fully as his cock started to go soft. It wouldn’t be long until he slid out of Seonghwa’s body making them both let out a disappointed sound. 

They cleaned up quietly in the small space, though Hongjoong did let out a chuckle at Seonghwa doing his best to wipe the cum off the wall. What they had done was worth the risk of being kicked out of the club and banned, but it wasn’t a scene. It was sex for the sake of it and Hongjoong didn’t know exactly how he felt about it. 

Then the anger of seeing Seonghwa pressed against another man bubbled back up inside of him. What game was Seonghwa playing? 

“I’m taking you home.” Hongjoong tugged his pants up. 

“Please,” Seonghwa nodded and smiled. 

No, he shouldn’t be smiling when Hongjoong was about to let it all out. Hongjoong distracted himself by pulling Seonghwa out of the stall and then out of the club completely. He managed to text his group chat, and Wooyoung, that he was taking Seonghwa home in the time between ordering the taxi and it showing up. 

The taxi smelled like stale citrus car fresher and the silence between them was nearly unbearable. Seonghwa leaned back against the seat with his knee firmly pressed into Hongjoong’s leg. It was obvious that he was still riding the high of their semi public sex. His cheeks were flushed, and hair messed up in a way that almost looked intentional. His lips were set in a small, dreamy smile as he looked between the window and Hongjoong. 

Hongjoong couldn’t help but watch him as he drummed his hand against his knee nervously. He couldn’t help the anger that curled in him at the memory of Seonghwa pressed up against the stranger, not even pretending that they weren’t grinding together. Had Seonghwa even wanted to fuck Hongjoong, or would he have taken anyone? 

“Did you have fun tonight?” Seonghwa suddenly asked. He looked over at Hongjoong with an easy smile. His voice was affectionate like nothing could be wrong between them. 

Hongjoong huffed out a frustrated noise, “yeah, sure.” 

Seonghwa didn’t seem to notice the stiff tone. He just giggled and leaned into Hongjoong. His perfume was sweet and distracting. “I think everyone in that bathroom was jealous that I got to leave with you.” His hand slid over Hongjoong’s thigh. 

Hongjoong stiffened. “You think so?” 

“Mhm.” Seonghwa’s fingers squeezed lightly. “But only I can have you. Right?” 

That made Hongjoong finally turn his head to look at Seonghwa. His pupils were wide, and everything in his expression was open and trusting. Seonghwa had no idea, no clue, that Hongjoong’s hands were curled into fists trying to hold back from an emotional outburst that should have come weeks ago. 

When the cab slowed in front of Seonghwa’s building, Hongjoong tapped his card on the reader and jumped out of the car. Seonghwa followed him, still smiling, still glowing under the streetlights. 

He reached for Hongjoong’s hand as they walked toward the door, and Hongjoong let him. It was easier than exploding outside of his fancy building. 

Seonghwa led them up to his apartment, and Hongjoong left his shoes on. He had no idea how this conversation was going to go so he chose to stay frozen in the entryway even with Seonghwa trying to pull him deeper into the apartment. 

“What the fuck Seonghwa?” Hongjoong finally spit out. 

“What?” Seonghwa frowned. 

“Why did you look like you were going to let that guy fuck you? What were you even doing out at that club? You said you weren’t dating? Did you lie about that?” Hongjoong spat out. 

“Hongjoong hold on. What?” Seonghwa held his hands up. 

“No. It felt like we were finally getting somewhere after the whole fourth date thing. Which felt like a punishment for me trying to be fucking considerate and letting you sleep.” Hongjoong was yelling now and he didn’t care. Let the neighbors report them. “Why would you do that to me? All you do is jerk me around. You’re so good when we’re alone, but I have no idea what you’re doing with these other men. I thought we were going to…” His yelling turned into a sad tone and Hongjoong had to fight back the urge to cry. 

“What? That we were going to what?” Seonghwa stood straight his face hardening. “I need you to actually say it for once, because I never know how you feel either Hongjoong. I see you and you look like a mess, and you give me all these half truths. I don’t even know what all those gifts mean because you bring things for Jongho weekly.” 

“I love you.” 

“Get out.” 

Hongjoong’s heart stopped, and he couldn’t stop the tears as they spilled down his cheeks. 

“No,” Seonghwa shook his head. “Just for now. We can’t do this drunk and mad. This isn’t, we can’t do this right now.” 

“Seonghwa don’t turn me away. You asked me to say it,” Hongjoong hiccupped. 

“Just tonight.” Seonghwa shook his head. “You’re so angry. I don’t want you to say it angry.” 

“I love you, and you keep going to other men.” Hongjoong said plainly. “It hurts. It hurts so much. You give me these hints but I never know how you really feel.” 

“I don’t want to stay it like this.” Seonghwa pleaded.  

“If I have to leave I need something to hold onto until Wednesday or we’re done. I can’t do this. You’re just hurting me.” Hongjoong shook his head. 

“You should have told me before.” Seonghwa shook his head. “I didn’t know Hongjoong, and I was confused to. I just had Wooyoung telling me that you were a lovesick puppy, and I didn’t believe him. I didn’t want to be left alone.” 

“You were dating.” Hongjoong yelled, frustrated. “I was always the one who was going to get left alone not you.” 

“They weren’t you.” Seonghwa breathed out before he continued. “After the first week I just wanted you even though it was a mess. I knew the second I saw you in that cafe that I was completely fucked. Maybe I knew when Yeosang showed me your picture. It’s been you since I first saw you. I just don’t want to do this angry Hongjoong. I want you to love me and not be mad about it.” 

“Just say how you feel. If you knew from the start, tell me now.” Hongjoong was shaking. “I need to hear it, then I’ll go. We can calm down, we can talk on Wednesday and finally figure it all out.” 

“I love you too.” 

“Okay.” Hongjoong twisted the door handle behind him. “I’ll see you on Wednesday. I’ll bring flowers.” 

“Okay.” Seonghwa echoed tears now streaming down his face to match Hongjoong’s. 

Then Hongjoong was gone feeing lighter and heavier than he had in a long time. 

They were in love with each other, but was that enough? 

Chapter Text

“I don’t want anything extravagant,” Hongjoong sighed. “Just something simple and beautiful.”

It was Wednesday, and Yeosang had gladly let Hongjoong leave work early so that he could pick up flowers for Seonghwa. The familiar routine of walking into the florist made him feel a little bit better about what was about to happen.

Hongjoong hadn’t pressed at the latest bruise like he normally would. Saturday happened and then he knew that he needed to figure out the most adult way possible to move forward from it. Seonghwa could be his if he just let himself have it, if they both just gave in a little, they could both have the kind of relationship they had always craved.

His tears on Saturday night had stopped by the time he made it home, and he slept with his headphones on, just like he had planned, to drown out any noises his roommates might have made. The entire night was obviously a set up, and to a certain extent it had worked. He was left alone with Seonghwa long enough for a confession to bubble up out of him, and he knew Seonghwa had been right. The confession shouldn’t have come out of anger and possessiveness. It was out there now though, and neither could take it back.

When he woke up Sunday morning something inside of him had finally loosened.

Seonghwa loved him. They had said the words to each other. It might not have been enough to get them through, but Hongjoong was going to do his best to make it work. He could exist with Seonghwa while they figured it out. He could give the other man all the time he needed.

“Pink kahala roses and burgundy carnations with some amaranthus. Simple and beautiful but a little dark and moody. We won’t go to large.” The flower ajumma smiled at him. “Next time will these flowers be for your boyfriend?”

“I don’t know.” Hongjoong answered honestly.

“I do. I think they will be,” she smiled. “Just give me about ten minutes.”

Hongjoong nodded to her and went to stand out of the way.

He loved Seonghwa.

He loved Seonghwa in a way that he hadn’t ever experienced love before. How he felt wasn’t the sharp and dizzying drug of things being new, no, his love was steady and something that was already lodged deep in his bones. He loved the graceful way Seonghwa dropped to his knees, he loved the way Seonghwa would smirk slightly before he said something bratty, he loved the way the other man let him into his life slowly and methodically. Seonghwa had been careful with his love, Hongjoong knew that now. Sadly, Hongjoong had been reckless and closed off with his.

How Hongjoong felt wasn’t just affection though. Seonghwa was someone that Hongjoong admired. He loved how much Seonghwa demanded of himself but still found space to be soft. Seonghwa was as demanding as he was tender, and he came apart so beautifully. He was someone who Hongjoong wanted to learn from while they took care of each other.

Hongjoong knew that he loved every version of Seonghwa, even the ones he hadn’t seen yet. He longed to know what Seonghwa would be like on a quiet night after a long day of work. He even wanted to know how Seonghwa would deal with a fight. Even though he suspected he got a sneak peek of that on Saturday night.

There were moments over the last few days where Hongjoong had thought about his feelings for Seonghwa, and the scope of them were almost terrifying. The way he loved Seonghwa had taken root in his life in such an embarrassingly short amount of time without him even trying. It wasn’t something that Hongjoong wanted to spend more time fighting though. He was ready to just give into it.

Loving Seonghwa was like breathing, and he wanted to take as many deep breaths as he could. Even if their relationship never became more than what it was now, it would still be enough that Hongjoong got to experience and accept that kind of love in his life. He knew it was special and not something that everyone got.

“Here you go Hongjoong.” The women held out a bouquet to him. Hongjoong smiled and patted down his pockets for his wallet. “No no. Confession bouquets are free for fools.”

“We already told each other how we felt on Saturday.” Hongjoong laughed.

“Well, you’re still a fool.” She smiled and forced the bouquet into Hongjoong’s hands before she walked away into the backroom.

Hongjoong considered leaving her cash, but he didn’t want to offend her to deeply and he knew if this went well, he’d be back every week for the rest of his life. He also only had so much time to spare. He had to stop by the cafe, Seonghwa wanted a treat.

Hongjoong navigated to the coffee shop easily. He had only gotten a few stray looks at his bouquet and he was just thankful that he didn’t run into anyone that he knew. The only focus he had right now was getting to Seonghwa as quickly as possible. Hongjoong knew his life was about to change drastically, he just hoped it was in a positive way because he didn’t know how he was supposed to live without Seonghwa.

If he had to, he’d figure it out. Just because Seonghwa had wormed his way into every crevasse of Hongjoong’s life didn’t mean that he had sunk into Seonghwa the same way. They were both experiencing the same thing in very different ways. Seonghwa loved him on Saturday. That didn’t mean he was still going to love Hongjoong on Wednesday.

He ordered what he thought was Seonghwa’s favorite, a vanilla latte, and after a moment he picked out an almond croissant from the display case. Seonghwa had never really eaten his treats while Hongjoong was there, but he knew the other man gobbled them up the second he left.

When the barista slid the drink and the small paper bag across the counter, Hongjoong thanked them and stepped back out into the street. The walk to the office was quick and Jongho didn’t even have anything smart to say when the elevator opened to reveal Hongjoong.

“I did it.” Jongho stated with a smile.

“Did what?” Hongjoong looked at him dumbly.

“Asked Yeosang to be my boyfriend.” Jongho’s neutral face turned into a bright smile. “Did he not tell you?”

“I’ve been a little distracted.” Hongjoong shrugged.

Jongho nodded, “I get that.” Jongho paused his face scrunted up in concentration. “If it helps, he’s been in a great mood today. And we’re all rooting for this to happen.”

“That’s good to know.” Hongjoong smiled. “What happened with Yeosang? I want to hear it from both of you.”

“Oh,” Jongho turned pink. “We um... spent the night together. It was really good, like the best ever, he’s... yeah.” Jongho stumbled over his words. “Then he kind of demanded we become official, so I didn’t even have to do anything. I hadn’t even caught my breath yet.”

“Yeah, good luck with him,” Hongjoong wasn’t about to embarrass Jongho by asking for more details. He knew he’d get all of them out of Yeosang later anyway.

“I don’t need luck,” Jongho crossed his arms. “This whole thing has been so easy with him. We just had to get to the right timing. I wanted to ask him out for months. I knew he was seeing someone else, I just had no idea who it was, and I had to wait. That sucked, but once we started going out alone it just flowed. You know?”

“I am not aware that dating someone can be easy at this moment in time,” Hongjoong shrugged. “Get back to me in like an hour.”

“Maybe it’s the right time for you two now and it’ll be easy from here on out,” Jongho said hopefully. “I think he’s ready too. I saw him Sunday and everything just felt a little different. Neither of you seem as stressed as you have been the last few weeks.”

“I’m not,” Hongjoong answered with complete honesty. “At this point we figure it out, or we don’t and I figure out how to move forward.”

“You’re always so dramatic,” Jongho laughed. “It’s obviously going to be fine.”

“Well, we’ll see. I’m just going to head down. You don’t need to call him.” Hongjoong took a step towards the walkway to Seonghwa’s office.

“Okay.” Jongho nodded and shrugged. “I have a good feeling about you two.”

“I do too,” Hongjoong shrugged before he walked off down the hallway.

He briefly looked up long enough to see his student’s mother. She smiled at him brightly and gave him a thumbs up. Apparently, people in the office did know that something was going on between him and Seonghwa. They were subtle enough, but their meetings were likely confusing and there was no way that they didn’t turn into office gossip when Seonghwa brought another man around.

That wasn’t something Hongjoong was going to think about right now. If things went well, he had to leave all of Seonghwa’s dating in the past where it should be. Just because he had decided to move forward with their agreement monogamously didn’t mean Seonghwa had, and to his credit, even when it hurt, Seonghwa had always been honest with him.

Hongjoong knocked on the door lightly with the back of his hand that was holding the coffee and paper bag. It only took a few moments for the door to swing open. Seonghwa’s pretty face lit up in surprise and Hongjoong couldn’t help but smile.

“These are for you,” Hongjoong held out the flowers. “I didn’t want to do too much.”

“Oh,” Seonghwa brought his nose to one of the roses. “These are beautiful. I mean, they all have been, but I think these ones are extra special.”

Hongjoong nodded and waited for Seonghwa to step to the side before he walked into the office. Seonghwa went to sit at his desk, posture graceful and unreadable, and finally nerves started to crawl up Hongjoong’s spine.

Hongjoong focused on where Seonghwa’s fingers were ghosting over the paper that covered the flowers that Hongjoong had just handed him. They had agreed on flowers, this was okay, he was going to be okay. They were in love, everything was fine.

For a moment everything was suspended. The paper bag in Hongjoong’s hand felt like it was a million pounds as he shifted his weight from foot to foot. The coffee was warm enough that it was burning the tips of his fingers but that was nothing compared to how fast his heart was beating.

“I brought you a treat too.” Hongjoong said. His voice was quieter than he intended it to be. “A vanilla latte and an almond croissant. I bet you haven’t eaten a proper meal yet.”

Seonghwa’s face lit up, and his eyes went from Hongjoong’s face to the drink in his hand. He didn’t say anything though. The silence, the same one that haunted Hongjoong from one of their last meetings in this room, stretched out and all of his earlier confidence was quickly starting to chip away.

He had been so sure that Seonghwa was going to fall to his knees and that everything was going to go back to normal. They were in love, they could just keep moving forward. That was clearly not what was going to happen though, and Hongjoong had no idea how to navigate the uncertainty.

“Should I sit?” Hongjoong swallowed and placed the drink and the bag on the desk. “I’m nervous.”

His throat went dry and tight. He wanted to tell Seonghwa that he loved him again, but he knew better than that. Last time he hadn’t been rejected, but he had been turned away. He wasn’t mad now, but there was no telling what was going through Seonghwa’s mind. For once Hongjoong couldn’t read the man across from him. Maybe he had never been able to outside of scenes in the first place.

Seonghwa’s eyes softened as he reached for the latte, and brought it to his lips. He took a long sip and let out a satisfied sigh. “If you don’t sit down, I might explode. I’m nervous too.”

Hongjoong sat quickly and looked at Seonghwa expectantly.

“Did you mean what you said on Saturday?” Seonghwa finally asked.

Hongjoong nodded. “I mean I don’t completely remember what I said. You were right, I was angry, I don’t know if I said anything that hurt you. You know I don’t want to ever hurt you. I just hated seeing you dancing with that guy. You said you stopped dating and then I had to see that.”

“Hongjoong.” Seonghwa laughed. “That’s not the part I’m asking about.”

“Yes, I love you.” Hongjoong said firmly. “That’s never been in question.”

“Okay.” Seonghwa nodded. “I meant what I said too.”

“Say it?” Hongjoong looked up and locked eyes with Seonghwa. “Please.”

“I love you,” Seonghwa let out a breath. “I was worried you were going to change your mind, and that you’d decide I wasn’t worth it.”

“That’s,” Hongjoong furrowed his eyebrows. “Dumb.”

Seonghwa let out a bright laugh, “and I guess, if I remember correctly, I knew about my feelings first.”

“Oh, don’t start with that,” Hongjoong laughed. “Who knew first isn’t a competition.”

“If it was though I won.” Seonghwa nodded.

“Then you didn’t have to date and put me through all that.” Hongjoong sighed. “You could have just asked me out and started something then, after the first few scenes.”

Seonghwa looked down. “I didn’t know that you felt anything for me. I promise I had no idea and I was scared to lose you. We had such a good thing, and you were so wonderful. I felt so safe with you. The guys I was dating were just something I was robotically doing because I made up my mind that I had to do it. The guy I was dancing with on Saturday didn’t mean anything either, I was just drunk, and it was fun. We aren’t even together.”

Hongjoong shook his head. “My feelings were worth less to you than something fun to do on a Saturday night?”

“They aren’t,” Seonghwa picked at his pants. “I care about how you feel, and I didn’t know how much I was hurting you. I thought I was protecting what we had by keeping to what we agreed on. Knowing I was going to have feelings for you right away doesn’t mean I wasn’t scared of them. It doesn’t mean I didn’t talk myself out of you possibly wanting me back.” Seonghwa sighed and looked around the room nervously. “My husband wasn’t physically abusive, but he was trash to me emotionally and he made me feel so small. I thought dating would help with my self-esteem, and help get rid of my feelings for you.” Seonghwa took a breath. “But you helped my self-esteem, and no one distracted me from you like they were supposed to.”

Hongjoong frowned, and opened his mouth to speak.

Seonghwa held up his hand and continued to talk. “Listen, I wanted someone like you my whole life and I thought it wasn’t ever going to happen. Then there you were. I gave up on finding someone just like you did. I thought I was too old to have this big love or get the things I wanted as a submissive. It’s hard to let yourself have everything you ever wanted when things normally go badly. San and Wooyoung got the happy ending, that wasn’t supposed to be for me.”

Hongjoong let the silence fall back down around him before he spoke. “I’m sorry you ever had to feel like that. Everything I ever said to you was real though. I’m here for as long as you want me, and I want to give you everything.” Hongjoong smiled and reached across the desk to grab one of Seonghwa’s hands.

“And if I want you forever?” Seonghwa questioned.

“Then I guess you need to learn to talk about your feelings.” Hongjoong smiled.

“Wooyoung and San knew.” Seonghwa pulled his hands back and shrugged.

Hongjoong rolled his eyes, “with me. They aren’t part of this relationship.”

“Oh no.” Seonghwa held up his finger and shook his head. “This is not a relationship yet. You need to take me out.”

“Excuse me?” Hongjoong laughed.

Seonghwa nodded, “you need to take me out, and then we need to have the what are we forth date talk to make sure it’ll work out.”

“Seonghwa,” Hongjoong laughed. “You know we want the same things.”

“And we are going to talk about that,” Seonghwa nodded. “This Friday.”

“That’s our scene night why can’t we do it tonight,” Hongjoong whined as he reached for Seonghwa’s hand again. “Or right now over lunch?”

“Because we’re doing this the right way.” Seonghwa rolled his eyes.

“Oh, now you want to do things the right way.” Hongjoong teased back.

Seonghwa pulled his hand back away from Hongjoong, “I’m not letting us mess this up again.”

“My demanding brat,” Hongjoong sighed with a smile.

Seonghwa grinned at him, “you have no idea.”

“Okay,” Hongjoong slumped. “I’ll take you out.”

“And then take me home to talk,” Seonghwa nodded.

“Are we doing a scene?” Hongjoong asked.

Seonghwa shook his head no, “I don’t think so. We can just do what feels right for us. If we want to have sex, we just can.”

“Oh,” Hongjoong’s mouth popped open he hadn’t considered that he would ever be able to just have sex with Seonghwa for the sake of it. Well, not when he was sober, or not when it was tacked onto the end of a scene and confusing.

It was starting to sink in that he could just have Seonghwa now. The man across from him was about to be his.

“Do you only want scenes?” Seonghwa scrambled to talk when Hongjoong didn’t say anything. “See we need to talk, I like sex without scenes too.” Seonghwa gave him a serious look.

“Me too,” Hongjoong said quickly. “Very much. I just never considered it with you. I’m not into being fully in our dynamic all of the time. Well, beyond your acts of service, and obviously that’ll all change with kids anyway.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself.” Seonghwa laughed. “We can talk about the kid thing on Friday.”

“Kid thing,” Hongjoong echoed and looked at Seonghwa in complete awe. Eventually the man across from him was going to be the father of his children.

The reality that he was so close to Seonghwa being his life partner hit Hongjoong so fast it made him feel light headed. A dizzy giddiness settled in him, and he couldn’t help but smile. Even though he was being a brat about it Seonghwa was his. This was it.

An alarm went off breaking Hongjoong’s train of thought.

“Sorry,” Seonghwa scrambled to turn off the alarm. “I have a meeting I can’t miss in ten minutes.”

“I want to stay,” Hongjoong said as he blinked a few times to clear his thoughts.

“Two days,” Seonghwa smiled at him.

“Fine,” Hongjoong stood up. “Can I kiss you?”

“Of course you can,” Seonghwa stood as well.

They both moved to the door and Hongjoong leaned up slightly to give Seonghwa a sweet and soft kiss.

“I liked those kisses the best,” Seonghwa smiled.

“Then I’ll give you more of them,” Hongjoong promised him. “Can you text or call later? I feel like we should still get to know each other before Friday.”

“Just say you’ll miss me,” Seonghwa poked at Hongjoong’s chest.

“I’ll miss you,” Hongjoong said without any hesitation.

A smile spread across Seonghwa’s face, “okay good, you can call me later, but now get out so I can work.”

“We need to work on how bossy you are.” Hongjoong laughed.

“Out,” Seonghwa smiled and pointed at the door.

Hongjoong scurried out of the door after that last ‘get out’ with a smile tugging at his lips. His shoulders slumped as the tension finally melted out of him. He was finally moving forward with Seonghwa. Everything was going to be okay. The tight weight of worry that had been sitting in his stomach for so long began to unwind, and for the first time, he let himself truly believe that nothing was going to go wrong.

There was no more uncertainty, no more waiting for Seonghwa to change his mind or turn Hongjoong away. The only person Seonghwa was dating now was him, and the only person he was going to be dating was Hongjoong. That thought alone made his chest ache in the best way.

What made it even better was that they both understood what the goal of the relationship was. It wasn’t temporary or undefined anymore. They were stepping into something real, something that was meant to last forever.

All Hongjoong had to do was make sure he didn’t ruin it. He just had to get through their date without saying the wrong thing, without letting his nerves get the best of him. I he could do that, if he could manage to hold himself together for one evening. Then everything would be official.

The walk home was quick and easy. Hongjoong had an extra lightness to him, and it felt like nothing to walk most of the way. He wasn’t even surprised to see Yeosang sitting on his couch, looking nervous, when he got there.

“So?” Yunho dared to ask first.

“We’re going on a date on Friday.” Hongjoong shrugged, trying his best to be nonchalant.

“He’s killing me with all these qualifiers what the fuck,” Mingi groaned and threw himself back on the couch.

“No this is good.” Yeosang stood up. “So, you guys can talk about the future? Right?” He looked at Hongjoong then to Mingi and Yunho. “That makes sense right?”

“It makes sense,” Yunho confirmed. “At least I think it does.”

“It makes sense for us.” Hongjoong said firmly. “It doesn’t need to make sense for anyone else.”

“Oh, now he’s going to be weird and secretive about things.” Yunho rolled his eyes.

“We all know Hongjoong’s relationship stages. We’re now in the don’t talk about it so we don’t jinx it portion of things.” Mingi commented.

“I hate this phase.” Yunho groaned. “Can you believe he landed a dilf baddie.”

“Those two things don’t go together.” Yeosang crossed his arms.

“I think they do if it’s Seonghwa.” Yunho grinned. “Have you see him?”