Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The street lanterns casted a dim light into the familiar alleyway. The entrance was well hidden - there were boxes pushed in front as well as a rag hanging from a balcony on top to conceal the small area you could squeeze through. Unfortunately, that rag was soaked with water since it had been raining for hours now, causing the entry to be bothersome and wet your clothing.

After squeezing through, her feet hit a puddle and the girl cursed underneath her breath as it would be a pain to have her shoes dry down, if they did that at all throughout the night. Her jeans were already soaked through, the damp fabric grazing her calves uncomfortably and making her shiver every single time.

“Elizabeth, I’m back”, she spoke, using her little sister’s full name out of annoyance at the whole situation. Possibly even some anger directed to the fact she had been sick and they now had to deal with the consequences. Her little trip to a restaurant two kilometers from there was unsuccessful as well - no food. The guy just sent her away angrily, telling her to get money and actually buy something instead of what she was doing. All in all the trip simply soaked her clothes thoroughly in the pouring rain, making her skin feel like ice. With her luck, she’d be the one who’s sick next, her nose already was running, at least.

She sent her Elizabeth, or Lizzy, to a nearby store to check the trashcans for something edible. They often had more luck around that area and there was that one very nice employee sometimes giving them expired groceries. Also, it was just 5 minutes away, which was way better for the smaller girl as she had been running a fever for multiple days on end now and should still prioritize rest, not walking through the rain for hours.

The girl stopped in her tracks as she looked at the empty alleyway, stunned.

This was their hide out. She spent so much time adjusting and collecting pieces to make living on the streets bearable. Well, she didn't always collect, honestly. You didn't find enough trash that was actually useful. But the girl was lacking any kind of guilty consciousness for stealing necessities - most of the people she took it from didn't need it as much as them anyway. It’s worth mentioning she was now a skilled pickpocket and very calm about stealing things in stores. Old mattresses, shabby blankets, metal cans or even pots, bottles, pillows were lying around the hideout, all stuffed under the small rooftop to protect them from the rain. Honestly, quite nice, compared to what other folks in their situation had to deal with. The trickling sound of the pipes dropping even more water only fed her growing annoyance.

The only thing missing was the inhabitant. Lizzy was not there yet, even though she should have easily been back by now. Hell, possibly an hour ago. Nothing had changed since they left. The blanket was in place, their only umbrella gone and the small stuffed animal tucked into another blanket. 

Charlie knelt down and looked at the little rabbit. She touched a soft ear gently, imagining it pressed up against Lizzy’s cheek. A sigh left her lips as she noticed it was moist as well, like everything lying around here. Why did it have to rain this much? Why now? At least leave the rabbit in peace..

Worry rose again in her chest. It was clear Lizzy hadn’t been here since they left almost 3 hours ago. That is way too long for a trip that’s supposed to last an hour, at best, if she maybe checked out some other spots on her way, which she wasn’t supposed to. She was scolded to not be gone for too long.

Something must have happened. 

As the realization dawned, that her sister probably was in trouble, she checked the pocket of the jeans she wore for the knife she carried with her most of the time. It was her form of self defense, that she did need to use in the past, or simply useful in cutting open bags etc. 

After checking she was good to go, she climbed back over the boxes, the rag grazing her shoulder uncomfortably as she dropped to her feet on the street. Her footsteps were quick and she was almost oblivious to the annoying feeling of her soaked, too large jeans hitting her ankles with the wet fabric along every step she took. The hole that ripped into it on her thigh let through even more water to soak them not only around her calves, but all the way up her legs.

The situation around her feet wasn’t much better. The soles had holes from walking in them too much as well, her socks soaked with water that squeezed out with every step just to be absorbed by the fabric again. Her whole body felt so cold it was almost numb, summed it up quite nicely. But she had much larger concerns than her own comfort.

After the five minute walk, the store came into view. She looked around, rain dripping into her eyes as she glanced at the sign declaring the brand’s name. She raised a hand to wipe the water off her face before shaking it off and slowly making her way around the corner. 

The alleyway with the trashcans was empty. Of Lizzy, at least. The large containers were standing there all the same. She dared to look inside. There were some traces of shuffling or even the usage of knives, as if to get something out. 

She suspected that might have been Lizzy. Now, why wasn’t she back already?

With a quiet huff she jumped off the container just to feel the water wring out of her socks and graze her feet yet again. 

She walked along the small rooftop and entered the grocery store.The bright light hit her like a truck, colors everywhere. The products sitting on the shelves made her stomach churn in jealousy. Noodles, drinks, sweets, eggs.. No, she was here for another reason.
“Excuse me?”, she asked the employee that was bent over a refrigerated shelf. His uniform was a bright red with some white details along the sides and ends of the sleeve. He was completely dry. Another wave of jealousy.

“How can I help you?”, he responded, slowly straightening his back. He didn't seem fazed by the girl soaked and dirty in front of him.

“I am looking for my sister. A girl this tall”, she held out her hand to her collarbone, “green eyes, dark blonde hair. Have you noticed her passing?”

The employee nodded. “Yes, she was just as soaked as you. Bought chewing gum”, he frowned, as if wondering why she would do that, “and then she left. "That direction.”
He pointed down the street the girl came from, leading to the hide out.

She was just as confused as he was. Lizzy got money to buy chewing gum? She didn’t even like chewing gum.

…

But she herself did. The girl liked chewing gum a lot, just rarely had it, for obvious reasons. 

“Thank you”, she muttered and turned to leave, the frown on her face still present. 

Silly girl.. Chewing gum? For me? Where did you go?

The door fell shut behind her and the beloved feeling of cold water hitting her neck returned. Her legs carried her down the street, her eyes flickering between the street lanterns that casted light upon the falling rain and the wet street and every possible alleyway. 

She was confused. Worry was still burning hot in her chest, yet there was soft affection to the gesture of her little sister. 

A whimper pulled her out of her thoughts. Not just any whimper. She knew that voice. She knew it. And she wished she didn’t. 

Without taking another breath she peeked into an alleyway beside an abandoned store. Her concern switched to blank terror within just a few seconds and for a moment she felt her eyes get blurry.

She could recognize that haircolor anywhere. The exact length, the uneven strands, the way too thin body curled up. 

“No”, the older girl pleaded while hurrying to the curled up bundle, dropping to her knees in front of it. 

Her jeans were soaked in more than just water now. The puddle forming beneath Lizzy was undoubtedly a mix of blood and rainwater. Her eyes widened in horror as she noticed her jeans taking up on the red color.

“Charlie?”, Lizzy asked softly, the voice trembling, yet somewhat hopeful to see her big sister.

“Yes. Yes. It’s Charlie.”, her own voice trembled the same way, despair clear. “What happened?”, she added quietly while grabbing her sister’s shoulder to turn her around and have her face her. Her heart dropped further as she noticed the red stain on the shirt. Her whole shirt was soaked the same way her own was. Only she had been moving. Lizzy hadn’t. Hers was also missing the concerningly large stain of red.

Lizzy only responded after a period of silence: “Knife.. A man dragged me.. he got the food..” - and she cut off again with a whimper as Charlie raised the shirt to reveal a stab wound right on her abdomen. 

“How long ago?”, Charlie muttered as she winced. Her cold hands grazed the pale skin on her sister’s stomach, blood smeared across it. Yet the skin was soft, just as it always was. The wound was deep though, no doubt. How could anyone do that to a little girl..?

“I don’t know”, Lizzy muttered, her body shivering in the cold. 

Without waiting any further her arms slung around her little sister’s body to pick her up.

“And? Keep talking, Lizzy, please”, Charlie pleaded softly, her arms trembling under the girl’s weight. She wasn’t even heavy, both of them were definitely underweight. She could feel the ribs against her arm and couldn’t tell if it comforted or stressed her even more.

"Ow… I’m scared”, was all the girl said yet again. 

“I know, honey, I know.. It’s gonna be okay, hm? I.. I can get you medicine”, Charlie mutters, her voice higher than usual. A few drops of water dripped from her bangs down onto Lizzy’s cheek as she bent over to try and shield her from the cold.

“Medicine?”

“Mhm.”

She didn’t even believe her own words.

“I’m with you. I’ll save you. For sure. I... I will”, she muttered before choking on her own words. Charlie felt her lower lip tremble. Oh, come on. She couldn’t start crying now. She was the strong big sister. She had always cared for Lizzy. She trusted her. She’s never seen her cry.

“I’ll save you.”

Charlie hurried back to her hideout, steps quick, she was practically jogging, therefore tripped over the fabric of her jeans multiple times, catching herself at the last moment before hoisting Lizzy back up to hold her tighter.

“I’ll save you, okay?”

Getting her limp sister over the boxes without hurting her further wasn’t incredibly easy either and she earned multiple whimpers and complaints from the bundle in her arms.

"Don't give up on me now, please", Charlie's voice spoke softly, barely audible to Lizzy through the continuous rain and the world around her fading. The girl knelt down, pulling a thin blanket tightly around the small body she had been carrying. Carefully she pushed her onto the old mattress that was just slightly moist from the rain as it had been sitting under the small rooftop. Just a few centimeters further though, the street was wet and the rain would most definitely soak you the same way it did the annoying rag covering their hideout. 

"It hurts, Charlie", the smaller bundle moaned, curling up.

"I know", Charlie responds urgently. Her hands were trembling softly, ice cold from the rain and probably stress, "Just stay with me, Lizzy. Keep your eyes open."

The little girl spoke up again with her trembling, weak voice: "Charlie."

"I know... I know...", was all she could respond. This was unbelievably cruel. How could life do this to her, after everything. To Lizzy, as well. She was merely 11 years old. She felt helpless.

It was too late, wasn’t it? If she had been back an hour - maybe two - earlier, she could possibly have prevented it.

Charlie was oblivious to the water dropping down her neck from her messy, dark brown hair. Her body felt numb, as if she was the person who was dying, not the small creature in front of her. Her gaze fell upon the bunny again. She felt a streak of warmer water run down her cheek. As she reached for the bunny and placed it against Lizzy’s cheek, her other hand came up to aggressively wipe away her tears.

Lizzy nuzzled against her little bunny.

"I am so sorry... I should have gone with you. How could I have known..? It's..", Charlie’s voice trembled.

At this point, it dawned on her that she would lose her little sister that night. Her eyes were drooping, skin even paler than usually.

Were her eyes even green? They always said they were green. But they weren’t. No, there was also blue in there. And grey. Like mist. Fitting, now that her eyes seemed foggy.

“You always wanted blue eyes, right?”, Charlie muttered, voice low, hollow.

“Yeah”, Lizzy hummed. 

“Well, you do. You also have blue eyes.”

“Mh?”

“They are blue.”

Her sister’s mouth curled upwards softly. Suddenly her trembling hand reached into her pocket and held out a small package of chewing gum.

“I got this. For you.”, Lizzy spoke almost proudly.

Charlie was crying now. Luckily it wasn’t too obvious with her hair dripping and rain falling. Or that annoying pipe in the background.

“Why?”

“You like chewing gum.”

She noticed how her speech seemed to be getting quieter and more slurred.

“I do. But why did you get it now? And with what money?”

“Found it in my pocket. You seemed.. sad.”

Charlie’s gaze softened further. It was so much effort to speak for her little sister. 

“Thank you.”

She wiped away some of her tears again.

“I’m dizzy”, Lizzy complained softly, her body already limp on the mattress that was now stained with blood as well.

“Just”, Charlie paused softly, her hand reaching for her sister’s head as she petted the wet hair there, “close your eyes. It’ll be okay. I love you.”

Lizzy gave in, her green-ish eyes drooping shut as she breathed slowly, obviously still in pain. Charlie stroked her cheek, petted her hair for minutes, muttering soft “It’s okay”s to soothe her.

“I love you. Bunny does too. We’re all here, yes?”

She only earned a weak nod or hum with her reassurances as she noticed her sister’s body grow weaker. 

It felt like an eternity until her breathing stilled, time dragging by until she couldn't tell if it had been seconds, minutes or hours.

The last heavy fall of her chest killed something inside Charlie. She bent down to press a soft kiss to her sister’s cold, pale forehead.

And it probably was another eternity following in which she simply stared down at the pale body in front of her as countless negative emotions started to build inside of her. Guilt, shame, hatred. It was boiling up slowly and successfully overcame the numbness that had been sitting in her gut for so long now. 

Strangely enough, she wasn’t even crying anymore. 

This felt familiar. 

It made her sick. The guilt rose until she felt she might burst. Her thoughts were swirling with blames and “What if”s. She was grieving. And she absolutely hated feeling emotions this strongly. 

Eventually, her hand moved automatically - just as it always did when she used to live with her parents. She moved the lit of a pot on the side and took out the eyebrow razor that she kept there ever after she had sneakily stuffed it into her pocket in a store - just in case, she would tell herself. Just in case.

And the case had now arrived. She moved her soaked sleeve away, looking at the old scars for only a moment. They were merely thin lines, invalid in her eyes. Pathetic. Because that girl had not failed at protecting her sister yet. That girl had not let down the only person she swore to protect. That girl had a reason to live, to protect. She didn’t.

Slowly, she dragged the razor across the skin to see how it felt after doing it after so long. Some blood slowly seeped out of the small line and now there was no way to stop until she wasn't fully satisfied.

Just like everything during that night, it felt like a trance she was in. The blade was gliding against her skin with more force, causing a stinging pain. Delicious stinging. The one she had been longing for for so long. The more she did it, the more relief she felt, blood running down her arms, making her feel lightheaded as the blame, pain and hopelessness seemed to seep out along the red liquid, leaving behind a strange sense of calmness. 

A deep breath left her. She didn’t notice the cold, the rain, or the grief. Just the stinging. She controlled it. At least something she could control. 

So, she just stared down at her arm for a while, watching the liquid seep out. The feeling that threatened to overtake her earlier seemed to be bleeding out of her slowly until nothing remained. 

She put the razor aside and into her pocket along with the knife she carried, then continued to stare down at the blood dripping down her arm, all the way to her fingers, leaking out of the multiple cuts covering her arm. It felt satisfying to watch. Right. Deserved. Relieving. Her mind was foggy as she stroked her sister’s cheek with one of her bloody fingers one last time before getting up, taking the bunny plushie with her. She didn’t even bother to put on a bandage or roll down her sleeve yet. She didn’t care. About nothing. Not the staring, not the danger of passing out, not the danger of bleeding out - even though she probably still failed at making it deep enough for that.

Charlie’s legs seemed to move on their own. Slowly, she made her way out of the hideout and began to aimlessly walk through the streets of Yokohama. The feeling that time was moving awfully slow did not go away at any point of her stroll. A minute felt like two. 10 like half an hour. She didn’t even know where she was going or what time it was at this point. She was even oblivious to the blood seeping down her arm and the rain dripping from her hair. 

The rain that continued crashing down, uncaring of what she went through, felt like a static. Her eyes seemed to be unable to focus, lost in her mind. 

She thought of the past week, Lizzy nuzzled up to the bunny while coughing and wanting Charlie to read her a book. She stole a book for her. Some stranger was reading on a bench and was looking at his phone. It was his fault for not looking. Finders keepers.

It wasn’t a good book though. Some sappy romance stuff. But it calmed Lizzy down and that was what mattered.

Her mind wandered back to the way her eyes looked just a.. while ago. No idea how many minutes or hours it had been. But she regretted not having her smile the way she always did. She did smile. But it seemed so sad, as if she realized Charlie had given up on her. Missing their spark.

Did she think that? Was her last thought really, that she gave up on her?

That she’s a failure?

Failure.

She only woke up from the trance when she crashed into someone, her head hitting their shoulder as she almost fell flat on the street. 

“Hey, watch where you're going!”, the person huffed.

Charlie blinked and tilted her head, looking at the guy she bumped into. Weirdly enough, she didn’t need to lean her head back into her neck like she usually had to, no, the guy was at the same eye level. 

Her hands clutched the bunny to her chest protectively as she studied the man.

He carried an umbrella, a black fedora sitting on top of his ginger locks. He was dressed in a white shirt, grey suit vest slung around his waist, a black coat loosely on his shoulders.

Most importantly, his clothes were dry. He didn’t shiver. And that made her incredibly aware of how she was shivering violently by now.

Charlie gripped a streetlamp, her head heavy, the world slow.

That earned her a confused stare from the guy in front of her. He didn’t continue walking like any normal person would have done after bumping into someone like her, he just stood there, assessing her condition. He seemed strangely surprised as if she had just done something incredible. His eyes also lingered on the plush bunny she held. 

“What are you doing here, hm?”, he spoke up again, somewhat wary. 

Charlie shrugged her shoulders, holding onto the lantern. She felt a mix of emotions, looking at him. Well, emotions , more like.. gut feelings. 

Guys gave you the gut feeling of “run” every time in general anyway. 

He wasn’t very intimidating though. And even if she wanted to run, she doubted her legs would carry her far. She just didn’t care enough. 

The man walked up to her, grabbing her wrist. The injured one. He took a few moments to assess the wounds before noting her worn out clothing and hair. Right, she had cut them with scissors, no mirror, on her own. No, Lizzy did. Lizzy always wanted to cut her hair. She didn’t care if it wasn't straight. But other people did.

Lizzy wanted to become a hairdresser when she grew up. She loved colorful hair and always tried to braid Charlie’s hair even though she hated it. She wished she didn’t refuse her sometimes. She’d give anything to have her little sister’s fingers moving and pulling her hair again. 

His gaze flicked to her wrist — the cut one. He stepped closer, taking it gently but firmly.

“Did you do this yourself?” His tone was calm, but the weight in it made her look away.

She came back to reality yet again.

After a short pause she nodded her head subtly. Would he start laughing? It was quite pathetic, to be honest. Her instincts were gone, she didn’t know what to tell and what to keep to herself.

“You an orphan? No home?", he figured.

She nodded again. 

“How old are you? What’s your name?”

“18. Charlotte."

Charlie’s voice felt hollow. It wasn’t really her own.

The guy was pausing for a while, the rain hissed on the umbrella between them as he seemed to be debating something. His eyes were wandering along her body, especially the wounds and the clothes. 

She totally forgot she was stained in her sister’s and her own blood, honestly. That must have been quite disturbing. 

“Are you… With the police?”, Charlie asked quietly. Stupid question. He didn’t even have a uniform. But why else would he do this?

The guy scoffed.

“Oh, no, quite the opposite”, he muttered, turning her wrist in his grip.

“I am Chuuya. I'm gonna bring you somewhere warm, is that okay, Charlotte?”, Chuuya spoke. 

Charlie didn’t quite know what to make of it. Why did he care? Was it a trap? Oh, what did she care about that at this point.

She shrugged her shoulders again.

In the next moment she felt a hand guide her shoulder and an umbrella held over them to stop her from getting even wetter. 

“C’mon, don’t be stubborn. It’s fine, I won’t hurt you.”

Chuuya led her through the streets slowly. Charlie missed the repetitive feeling of the cold rain hitting her neck, her hair dripping water. Now it started drying down slowly, feeling just as disgusting.

She almost walked straight into the building Chuuya stopped in front of and he scoffed yet again, pulling her back.

“Careful”, he muttered, pulling her to his side as he got out his keys.

Perhaps it’s her turn to be saved?

Chapter Text

Chuuya guided her up a flight of stairs and the number of times he needed to steady her by gripping her waist was getting quite embarrassing. 

Being inside a building felt like a major contrast to her living situation beforehand. The light wasn’t bright or hurting her eyes, just a dim, warm shine that illuminated the room. The feeling of the cold night air hitting her face had stopped as well, not that she was complaining. She was shivering and still in drenched clothes. 

As she reached the top of the stairs and passed a door, her head tilted. The smell of someone’s apartment was hitting her senses and made her awfully self aware of her own scent. 

You don’t get a lot of shower opportunities while living on the streets. 

“Put off your shoes”, Chuuya murmured, gesturing to a mat. He didn’t seem to mind her being dirty that much. Otherwise he wouldn’t have brought her here, probably.

Charlie followed the given orders and bent down to undo the shoe laces before kicking them off. Chuuya remained nearby to make sure she didn’t pass out, his gaze firm, yet gentle.

When she finished, Chuuya motioned for her to follow. 

At the first glance Charlie noticed that the apartment was quite damn large. It didn’t need an expert to figure out that this guy must have money. There was a shelf, closed up with a lock, wine bottles inside and another one with different glasses close nearby. 

The couch was grey and could be fit for a whole family night, a dining table made of wood, real, sensitive wood, probably, whereas the floor in front of the couch was covered by a carpet, one of those fluffy ones you could cuddle into. 

Before she could take in further details, Chuuya pulled out a chair to sit her down in the kitchen. He handed her a warm cloth.

“Wipe that blood from your arm and press down on the wounds if you have to. I will look for a change of clothes.”

With that, he made his way to another door.

Charlie sat in the warm room for a bit, the soaked clothes clinging to her skin uncomfortably cold and wet. She was so sensitive to the cold she felt a drop of water running down her back, causing her to shiver and shift in her seat uncomfortably. 

Her gaze flickered to her cut up arm and slowly she felt her actions dawn on her. It was like the warmth brought her back to reality and everything else felt like a nightmare. The only evidence that those actions were real clung to her body directly. The blood on her jeans, her stupid arm..

“I told you to clean your arm up, didn’t I?”

She flinched softly and looked up at Chuuya who was back in front of her. There was some dry clothing loosely draped across his forearm. Just something casual, it seemed.

Charlie apparently was staring too long again because Chuuya dropped the clothes onto a nearby chair with a barely audible sigh and took the warm cloth from her. His free hand grabbed her wrist firmly, yet careful not to hurt her. 

As the cloth touched the cuts, Charlie flinched and wanted to pull her arm away from his touch. 

“Calm down, will you? I am helping you”, he huffed and continued to dab the wash cloth along her arm with a concentrated face. 

“Sorry”, Charlie muttered softly, “can’t focus.”

Chuuya moved on to a different section of her arm.

“Because it hurts?”

“Nah. That was the point, I suppose…”

Her shoulders slumped.

“Why else? Too cold?”, he asked with genuine interest, even if his dabs on her arm were a little awkward. 

“It’s a lot of factors.”

Chuuya nodded slowly. The bleeding wasn’t stopping yet, but it seemed less severe.

“Can you wash yourself?”

“What?”

“Like, shower. Wash your hair. Change clothes. Or do you need help?”, he explained with some subtle annoyance at her being out of it.

“I can.. Use your shower?”

Charlie looked up at him with some bewilderment.  

“Yeah? You need one.”

“Pff. Thanks. I stink that bad?”, Charlie grumbled, some sarcasm present, almost forgetting about her earlier outbursts.

“You do, no offense”, he responded without hesitating, eyes shifting up to her face before focussing back on her arm, “but it could be good to warm you up as well.”

Charlie gave him a few more seconds of her just staring at him before nodding softly.

“Okay..”, she muttered as Chuuya suddenly reached for her hand to help her up. 

“Wash up, change your clothes and then I will bandage you up and we’ll talk about it, okay? I’ll stay close. Can’t have you fainting.”

Her eyes widened subtly at the way she was being handled.

“You won’t kick me out?”, she asked carefully, holding onto him for support as she reached for the clean clothes.

“Kick you out? No, dumbass, why would I do that? Just behave yourself, got it?”, he scoffed and led her to the bathroom.

Charlie kept her gaze glued to the floor, head throbbing. She was confused at everything, but especially the care this random guy showed towards her. Who would pick up a random girl strolling through the streets in the pouring rain? Except creeps, she supposed.

She couldn’t help some heat creeping up her neck though.

He opened the door and Charlie peeked inside carefully. How was everything so cozy around here? Even the bathroom light casted a warm glow across the tiles and everything was kept in elegant, dark colors.

A lot of red, actually. But the nice, dark kind. 

“Just don’t use too much of the expensive shampoo and conditioner, okay? Normal portions,” Chuuya warned.

Charlie nodded up at him and caught the towel he threw at her. Red as well, for some reason.

“Good luck then. Don’t lock the door, I’ll wait outside.”

She frowned at that, yet couldn’t blame him. With how she was acting, he might suspect her of fainting or going crazy with harming herself again. She didn’t even know if she would trust herself at that point. 

What did she have to lose anyway?

She closed the door as he walked out of the room, sighed, and laid the fresh clothes and towel out on the toilet seat. 

Carefully, she began undressing herself, making sure to not stain anything with her arm or the blood soaked clothes.

It was quite a pain since she felt heavy and light headed. Something seemed to weigh her down as if straps were attached to her arms and the ground, which were hard to pull on and fighting back constantly. Same thing with her legs. She couldn’t help but think of those weights attached to prisoner’s ankles in movies to keep them from walking.

It described the feeling quite well.

As she pushed her jeans down her hips, her movements stilled. Her gaze fell upon the things she had left in the pockets earlier. The knife, the razor and the chewing gum.

That stupid chewing gum. Her hand tightened around it and something inside her gut stirred again, pushing through the numb feeling that drained her for the past hour, that’s been fogging her mind and making her feel like she was watching a bad movie out of third person. 

She took a deep breath and placed the chewing gum into the bunnies hands. Yes, she carried it around with her everywhere Chuuya took her. No, she would not leave it out of her sight for even a second.

After being undressed completely, Charlie stepped into the shower. Her arms held onto the tiles, supporting her frail, trembling body. As she turned the water up, she shrieked and pressed against the wall of the cabin.

Right. They did that. Always being awfully hot or cold at the beginning. 

Charlie chose a rather hot temperature. The water slowly soaked through her partly dried hair and then ran over her body, leaving a comforting feeling behind. Her limbs had been freezing, the warmth felt like heaven, making her shivers pass gradually.

Her gaze fell upon her arm, the water washing the blood off, which made her hiss in pain as the cuts burnt.

She stood there silently for several seconds, unsure if she liked or hated it. The cuts, at least. The shower felt good either way. 

Her eyes flicked to the bottles neatly organized in a little filing and her head tilted. This guy was quite organized. Didn’t even use some 3 in 1 shower stuff she sometimes bought for her sister and herself as they were versatile and quite cheap.

She carefully chose a bottle and read the tag. After choosing everything she wanted, she began washing her hair, conditioning afterwards and washing the grime off her body properly, soaking in the hot water as her arm burned. 

While working on her hygiene, she couldn't quite make up her mind about her feelings and opinions about this night. It felt unreal. Her sister was gone. Forever. 

Her corpse was just.. lying there. Probably. Had she planned to come back? She probably didn't even know during that moment. 

She failed her again.

Asking Chuuya was an option. But she would need to explain all of the events of the evening and that made a shiver run down her spine despite the hot water covering her body.

Embarrassing. That guy didn’t know what kind of a bad person she was yet. 

Leaving behind the body of the person dearest to her.

She didn’t want to talk about it. She just wanted to forget. Try to embrace being in a house for once. With someone who wasn't Lizzy. 

But that felt wrong.

She tried to ban that thought from her head. The thought of failing her. Never seeing her again. It was something she didn’t want to imagine. How could things change so quickly? She wouldn’t come back with some old bread fished out of a trash container and share it with that little girl complaining how dry it was.

Never.

Those days were over. And the worst part was - they were over because of her.

Suddenly the hot water causing her arm to sting wasn’t that unwelcome anymore.

“Are you done soon?”, Chuuya called, a subtle hint of annoyance in his otherwise even concerned voice.

“Yeah, yeah. Just give me a moment.”, Charlie responded in a much quieter voice, unaware if Chuuya even heard that.

Charlie finished up her shower and stepped out slowly, drying off her frail body. Her body featured some traces of living on the streets for that long - bruises, cuts, tense muscles and especially her ribs showing through. 

She carefully pulled the fresh shirt over her head. It fit her quite well, a little too large, but it felt soft and dry against her skin, the loose fabric was only comforting her even more.

It felt so clean against her skin. Too clean. Too soft. She didn’t deserve it, yet enjoyed it nonetheless.

How selfish are you?

After getting dressed, she opened the bathroom door and noticed Chuuya sitting on the couch with some medical equipment in front of him.

Her hands were wrapped around the few belongings she actually brought with her. The razor, the knife, the bunny - and, well, the chewing gum.

“You took long enough”, he grumbled as his eyes flickered up at her.

“Had a lot to clean up”, Charlie responded while slowly making her way across the rug, feeling the imaginary weight attached to her ankles drag across the floor, making it seem like time slowed. She sat down in front of him and she shifted uncomfortably, scared to ruin the furniture with her dirty presence, even though she wasn’t even dirty anymore - she felt dirty.

As if the blood of her sister was still clinging to her skin and stained everything she touched, reminding her of failure, blaming her for leaving her behind, making false promises.

Being in a house. Being warm. Feeling comfortable, dry.

“Are you feeling better?”, he asked, but his expression darkened after seeing what she carried.

“Hey, gimme that. No blades for you”, he scolded, reaching out.

Charlie pulled everything closer to her stomach, protective of the stuff she brought, but Chuuya wouldn’t have it, snatching the knife and razor out of her lap.

Charlie snatched the knife back with a huff yanking it back to her chest, the knife, however, didn’t stay there. 

Chuuya didn’t even touch it - it was illuminated by a subtle, red hue and harshly winded out of her grip, back into Chuuya’s hand.

“What -! How-?”

He unlocked one of the cupboards and put her belongings into it, treating them carefully as he set them down and locked them up along the stupid glasses inside.

Charlie was stunned, doubting her mental state at this point. He didn’t touch it. Why did it feel like he did? Was she going crazy? What sick magic was that?

Chuuya wordlessly sat down in front of her and motioned towards her cut wrist, wanting her to hand it over.

She complied, reaching out the irritated arm, the cuts subtly swollen at the edges already. At least she still had the chewing gum and bunny. And she would not, ever, let him lock those away.

“Are you feeling better?”, Chuuya asked, unbothered by her bewildered gaze.

“I-”

She blinked and her head felt like it was spinning again. 

“I.. guess.”

Her eyes flickered down at her lap again, unable to speak further. 

Chuuya wasn’t oblivious to her hesitance. He carefully reached for her wrist and sprayed some disinfectant on before pressing down on them gently.

“Did the reason you hurt yourself for get better?", he asked, eyes flickering back up at her.

Charlie shook her head, gaslighting herself to forget whatever he just did.

“No, that’s basically the only thing that’s not better.”

He tilts his head, a strand of hair falling into his face. Charlie now dared to study him a little closer. Up to this point, she had no interest in learning a new face, she didn’t even think about looking at the eye color because she was too focused to study her sister’s eyes.

His eyes were way different than her sister’s. This guy had two separate eye colors, actually. Paid great attention, didn’t she? How could she only see that now? It was quite striking.

The right one featured a clear, blue iris that seemed to pierce through her. Blue eyes just kinda did that. Pierce through you. Because of that she turned to the other eye, a warm brown tone, much more pleasing to look at.

She was surprised that one wasn’t red. 

“You’re staring”, he interrupted her thought process, the cloth still pressed against her arm, unmoving.

“So what? You were staring just as much.”

“Well, you're acting strange”, he sighed and lifted the cloth. After making sure the blood flow seemed to be practically stopped, he applied some antibiotic ointment.

“Why would you take in a strange girl, then?”

He seemed hesitant in his answer and tried to cover it up by focusing on her arm.

“I noticed something”, he muttered eventually.

“What?” , she scoffed, “The blood?”

“Tch. Well, yes, that too.”

Charlie frowned. 

“What would be more striking? Being crazy?”

“I’ll tell you some other time”, he dismissed before reaching for a clean bandage, “Maybe even earlier if you tell me what’s up with these cuts. Or you, in general.”

Charlie closed off again, the stinging feeling in her chest returning. She liked talking to him, but she did not enjoy talking about the events of the night. Not yet. She didn’t wanna start crying in front of him or something.

“I just lost someone, okay? I don’t want to talk about it”, she murmured reluctantly, not looking up at him.

He seemed to weigh his responses carefully before speaking up.

“I’m sorry. Who was it?”, he said eventually, not mentioning the fact he still found the reaction questionable.

“Sister.”

“Little?”

Charlie nodded subtly, reluctant. She kissed her teeth, looking down at how he applied the bandages. Her mind was torn between wanting to tell him and keeping it to herself.

That weight on her limbs returned immediately, tying her up and stabbing right through her chest. 

Chuuya finished bandaging her and gently set the arm down. For a moment, he looked away awkwardly.

“Do you carry that bunny everywhere?”

Charlie’s head shot up and she gave him a subtle glare.

“ Yes. It was hers. That an issue?”

Chuuya leaned back against the couch and raised his hands in surrender.

“No, no, jus’ curious ‘s all”, he responded quickly, taken aback by her protective demeanor.

Charlie nodded firmly, hugging it to her chest. He wouldn’t take that plushie from her, no matter how childish it was.

“I’m gonna get you some food.”

Her eyebrows raised but she nodded and appreciated the fact she could let the topic drop for now. 

She sunk back against the couch, letting out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. This was comfortable. The dry, clean clothes against her skin, the soft cushion on her back, the warm light and the rain hitting the window. She smirked - it wouldn’t get her wet now.

Yet she didn’t feel okay. It just wasn’t okay to be here without her little sister. She swore herself to get them a place to stay soon and, well, failed miserably. 

And now she was able to live that dream. But not the one she wanted to live it. 

As she felt her eyes burn again she huffed, gaze darting around the room to find a distraction. Her eyes flickered to a shelf next to the dining table and her eyebrows raised .

Helmets. For a motorcycle.

“You got a bike?”, Charlie asked somewhat curiously. 

Chuuya had just returned with a cup of instant Ramen that he placed in front of her.

“Yeah, why?”

“The helmet. Didn’t take you for a biker.”

She turned towards the food and picked up the cup. That flavour was new to her.

“Well, I am a biker. Maybe I can take you along some day.”

Charlie choked on the first few noodles she ate.

“Huh?”

“Careful, don’t stain the couch, dumbass.”

She cleared her throat and curled up softly, focussing on the food. 

She ate in silence, the spice and warmth of the food was something she wasn’t exactly used to anymore. 

The flavor burnt down her tongue and throat. She didn't mind it though, as it was a sensation to focus on instead of her blood leaking from that huge, imaginary hole in her chest.

It hurt just the same.

“You can sleep on the couch. I prepared some fresh sheets”, Chuuya spoke up eventually, his eyes following her carefully. He probably was a little concerned for his couch after seeing her chopstick skills.

She didn’t use them a lot, okay? Dont stare.

“I can?”

“Yes, I why else would I tell you that?”

“Just making sure.”

“Can’t you accept some kindness?”

That struck her a bit and she had to stop stuffing her mouth in order to process his words.

Chuuya noticed, his eyes softening subtly. He reached out to pat her shoulder.

“I told you, I won’t hurt you. I will show you some stuff tomorrow, okay?”

The soft tone he was talking in threw Charlie off and she was unable to raise her gaze from the cup. She knew her face must have turned red, uncomfortable at being treated nicely. 

God, what could she even endure today?

“Uhm.. Thank you”, she stuttered, “For, like, the food and the bandage and the shower and taking me in.”

Her voice broke which made her curl up further.

Why was being nice and receiving gentle treatment so damn difficult? 

It felt wrong, being treated that way. Like there was some malicious intent behind it. Something lingering behind those words, the gentle eyes, making one fall for it and then pouncing at them, ripping everything apart.

“Don’t thank me yet. We will see how all this turns out. But for now, you’re welcome.”

He reached out to give her a side hug before getting up and taking the sheets he laid out earlier.

“Go to bed. And no more harming, got it?”

Charlie shrugged subtly, her jaw tight.

“I mean it.”

With that he got up and grasped the cup of instant ramen to throw it away before moving to a door that was still unknown to her and flicking the light.

“Good night.”

Charlie’s eyes followed him all the way.

“Good night”, she muttered.

The sheets were laid out just in front of her and she crawled across the couch and lifted the blanket. The small package of chewing gum was held tightly in her fist, the bunny plushie hugged to her chest despite the dirt and droplets of blood covering it. 

Her mind swirled with tons of thoughts and questions she had no answer to. That hole in her chest was still present and it left behind a numb feeling.

She couldn’t care enough, though. The cushion, warmth and softness of the clothes and blanket lulled her exhausted body to sleep quicker than she expected. 

Chapter Text

Charlie’s eyes opened slowly, disoriented and thrown off for a moment as she recalled yesterday’s rollercoaster of emotions and events. What brought her back to reality was the left arm she had been sleeping on, stinging painfully. Like, really painfully. She sat up, swallowing excess saliva just to meet the feeling of a sore throat.

Great, just, great, really.

Her eyes flickered down at the bandage around her arm. A few spots of blood seeped through, probably all irritated after accidentally putting on too much pressure and friction. She debated if it was worth fussing over and concluded it wasn’t. 

The bunny was still on her lap, the realization daring to bring back the familiar sting, so she chose to set it aside gently, placing the gum right next to it. 

She slowly kicked off the blanket, swinging her legs over the edge of the sofa and her bare feet hit the soft carpet underneath. As she looked up from her lap, her gaze fell on a note placed on the coffee table.

I have to work. Didn’t want to wake you, I felt like you needed the rest. Food is on the kitchen counter. I will be back by the afternoon.

-Chuuya

Her eyebrows shot up. Work? What was he working as? 

“Are you… With the police?”

“Oh, no, quite the opposite”

The words echoed in her head and she hummed quietly at the realization. 

What did she get into here?

She placed the note back onto the coffee table and stood up slowly, stretching her aching back with a sigh. Food sounded good. And simply as that, her legs carried her towards the kitchen.

She felt lighter than yesterday. Not like someone tried to bind her to the ground - yet not okay. Her mind still carried some fogginess and her chest still felt strangely hollow. The hole was still there, just not bleeding aggressively anymore. Time to stuff that with food, hm?

Charlie found some simple rice, eggs and vegetables on the kitchen counter. Sure, no gourmet meal, but what would she expect? Not like she was used to eating high quality or delicious food anyway. And expecting that guy to feed her something like that was ridiculous anyway - she was just some crazy street rat and could be lucky he thought about feeding her at all. 

She grabbed the bowl and plate along with a pair of chopsticks and went to sit at the dining table. As she ate, her mind wandered to think of the last time she had been in an apartment and ate like that. Probably with her parents. 

The picture of the dining table was burnt into her brain. That white, cheap table with stains of food, the worn down edges and splitted paint. Wooden chairs not matching the table stood around, two larger ones with angled legs at the shorter ends and some basic, thin and wobbly chairs at the longer lengths. Lizzy would sit next to her sometimes, observing her dad flat on the couch. The scent of alcohol and smoke filled her nose and she shivered at that, trying to focus back on the egg.

That was long over. Even longer than her sister staring up at her with those tired eyes. 

Of course she knew it was yesterday. But it felt like weeks had passed already.

She swallowed another batch of rice, her throat complaining already. Her gaze flicked to the clock on the wall and Charlie was stunned to read the time. 1pm. How? Did she sleep that long?

God, no wonder Chuuya didn’t wake her. She must have been out cold.

Charlie took time to eat her food. It would take a while until he returned and she didn’t know how to spend her time anyway, so might as well enjoy the proper food she got without fearing for stomach issues - she was prone to those.

Minutes passed and she picked up the dishes, sneaking back into the kitchen. She didn’t even know why her steps were so incredibly soft - she didn’t need to be scared someone noticed her. She wasn’t doing something illegal. Yet somehow she felt like she needed to hide, be unnoticed, careful to not ruin anything and give no one reason to yell at her.

She placed the dishes in the sink softly and remained in the spot, unsure what to do with them. Wash them? Leave them? Where should she put them?

Why was staying in someone's living space so difficult? She didn’t know any rules and also didn’t want to mess up.

Reluctantly, her hand flicked on the water of the sink and she rinsed the dishes out, then left them there. Good enough. She could apologize later if something wasn’t done right in Chuuya’s eyes.

So, what now? She had the whole apartment of some rich guy to herself. And honestly, sitting down on the couch would only steer her thoughts back to last night and even though she knew she’d deserve to be plagued by those feelings, she wanted to hide from them for now. Distract. Because those eyes had followed her into her dreams and she couldn’t bear having that picture appear in front of her eyes at every free minute she could think freely. 

She chose to just look around for a bit. Maybe peek into some rooms she hadn’t yet seen. 

First door was one in the kitchen, leading to a storeroom with pantries scattered around. She noticed packages of rice, cans with random stuff inside, nothing of interest honestly. Uninterested, she flicked the lightswitch off, closed the door and wandered back to the living room. Despite knowing better, she couldn’t help staring at the door leading to his bedroom. It interested her immensely, no clue why. It was so private.

Just taking a small peek wouldn’t hurt, right?

Lacking any kind of self-restraint, she pushed the door open softly. She was met with the sight of a Queen-sized bed, sheets the same elegant red color the rug and towels in the bathroom had. The bed was made with the blanket folded neatly and pillow pushed against the headboard. There was a desk pushed into the corner with stacks of papers and some books scattered around. Right next to it stood a dresser in the same color as the dining table and that was definitely catching her interest.

Clothes. Especially a guy’s. She opened the dresser and was met with a wide variety of pieces. Button up shirts in black, white and dark red, different kinds of vests and coats, yet also leather jackets, denim jackets, hoodies, graphic tees - she definitely was impressed. He might actually have been right about being a biker. 

And had some sense of style.

Even more interesting was the jewellery department though. 

Oh, that’s where she would go weak. In stores she could often not help it - ripping necklaces from shelves and stuffing them into her pocket. It felt good, taking them, and she realized her collection was still in the hide out. With her sister’s -

No. Nope. Not now. She would just take one of these chokers. It would calm her down. It would be hers. He had so many. Just one wouldn’t hurt.

Charlie chose one with a small charm attached and pushed it into her pocket. The feeling in her chest eased and her hands were wrapped tightly around the chain.

“And what exactly do you think you’re doing?”, a stern voice appeared behind her, certainly not amused.

Charlie jumped and tripped over the edge of the bed with a squeal, catching herself in an embarrassing, almost cartoon-y way. She had not heard him approach. Usually she did, but he must have been rather quiet and she was too indulged in sniffing around his room. 

Her face burnt up with shame and she gulped, realizing in what situation she had gotten herself in. This guy gave her everything and she was caught stealing his personal belongings. 

“I don’t - I’m sorry! I’m so sorry - I swear, it’s not what it looks like-”, her voice stuttered.

“Is it now?”

“Maybe it is”, she admitted nervously, retracting her hand from her pocket, “Here.”

She pushed the choker into his hand, then wrapped her own arms around her torso in shame.

“I’m sorry. I can explain.”

“Go on.”

He seemed so stern now, looking into her eyes firmly - major contrast to how he’d been treating her since she met him. That was intimidating. Especially the blue eye. God, why did blue eyes always need to pierce through you like that?

“It’s a stupid habit. I swear, I don’t know why I did it. I felt bored and wanted to distract myself. To not think too much. And then I remembered my jewellery stash. And that made me think. And - well - it’s a stupid habit, taking these and, well, it calms me down -”

“You have a lot of strange habits. Cutting up your arm, stealing jewellery. Really? I don’t get the point.”

She huffed.

“I don't know. I wish I did. Especially the jewellery things. I just want to have things that belong to me. And jewellery is pretty. Sometimes expensive. I want it. Makes me feel good.”

Her voice was stuttering, scared she would end up on the streets again, be thrown out again . After that action, she would definitely deserve it though. But she didn’t want to, she kinda liked the idea of staying here. Why did these stupid habits always catch up to her? Twice now, in front of him. Her gaze was glued to the ground.

“And cutting? What makes you want to hurt yourself?”

That topic was even worse.

“It varies”, she muttered.

“You owe me an explanation now, Charlotte.”

“Don’t use that name, please”, Charlie grumbled, blurting that out without thinking.

“Why now?”

“Just say Charlie. I know I introduced myself as Charlotte, but I only do that to strangers”, she admitted, “Charlotte sounds stupid.”

He sighed. “Okay then, Charlie. Back to cutting.”

“Fine”, she murmured, “Just don’t laugh, okay?”

“I won’t laugh at you having reasons to resort to such drastic measures. I might not understand, but I won’t talk down on it”, Chuuya spoke firmly. There was a hint of gentleness, which surprised her. He just caught her like that and still seemed patient?

The respectful words made it even worse, heat creeping up her neck and face. 

He would laugh. He just tried to coax her, probably.

He gave her an expectant gaze and Charlie chose to speak up. She would probably get kicked out anyway and her chances were worse if she refused him now, hence she tookm a deep breath and began ranting.

“Well, as I said, it depends. Sometimes I just want to be in control of something. But usually it’s because I’m either overwhelmed or completely numb. So, usually I did it because of numbness, when you're so numb you feel as if your body is an empty vessel walking around with no emotion or thoughts remaining, it feels good to awaken your senses. The burning doesn’t even feel bad when it’s your only sign of life. It’s like a wake up call that later on will only lead to numbness and create a viscous cycle of being numb, cutting, being numb again and then cutting again, which I was when I was younger”, she paused her ranting to take a deep breath, no going back now, “But this was because I was overwhelmed with feelings. It’s just as bad to feel your whole body burning with emotion, such as guilt, hate, frustration, hopelessness, despair, grief. Feeling all of that at once can make you feel as if you’re overrunning with emotion and will eventually explode. In that case, cutting acts as a way to open pathways to relief that access emotion. It feels like the blood represents emotion and thoughts and seeps through the wounds, relieving your insides. And the pain only makes that pain you feel inside more realistic as most people think emotional pain doesn’t exist in that measure.”

Chuuya looked at her, stunned. She had not blinked once during that rant, her gaze fixed on the floor as she spoke from her heart. He had not heard her talk that much before - obviously because they had barely talked at all, still, he didn’t take her as someone to rant about it openly since she seemed incredibly shy and clumsy with words before, he didn’t expect her to actually form proper sentences.

“I told you now”, Charlie mutters and rubs over the bandage covering the wounds nervously. This was risky, but she got lost in her own thoughts. 

Honestly, it did feel good to explain it to someone for once. Usually people just stared and dismissed. He listened.

Chuuya still didn’t seem to truly understand. He could follow the thought process, but imagining to resort to those methods himself felt ridiculous.

“Thank you for sharing that with me”, he muttered, gently taking a hold of Charlie’s wrist, “I would still appreciate it if you tried to stop coping like that. Now, I will forgive you for going through my stuff, given your current emotional state. Let’s return to the living room, okay?”

“You just… Forgive me? Like that? No.. Consequences? Mocking?”

“No, I won't mock you. And there won’t be consequences, yet. I just hope you've learned.”

With that, he tugged her back to the couch. Charlie was genuinely stunned at how calm he acted. Some other people would have for sure started yelling at her and thrown her back out.

Chuuya sat her down on the couch. The side with her sheets still messily draped all across. She was not as organized as Chuuya. Great impressions, for sure. She still had to take the bunny plushie back into her lap. She just had to. It looked so lonely. 

“Okay, now that you have told me something important, I will start explaining why I took you in and what you’re gonna be doing”, Chuuya spoke slowly, making sure to peak her interest and have her attention on him. 

Charlie listened up, building the courage to focus on his eyes. The brown one. Definitely.

“I told you already, I ain’t exactly working - well - according to law, I guess. But as I saw you yesterday, drenched in blood and seemingly homeless, I figured you would take working in this organization with me quite well. And, well, I also have a suspicion of you being a little more special than you might be aware.”

“Organization? And what- ‘special’? How ‘special’?”, Charlie asked urgently.

“The Port Mafia. It’s an organization that especially focuses on members that carry supernatural abilities.”

"Supernatural? Stop shitting me.”

Chuuya groaned in response. He then put a hand onto the coffee table in front of them. It received the same red hue Charlie had noticed the night before already. He removed his gloved hand slowly, building the suspense. The color on the table remained though, and suddenly the table raised up into the air, spinned around itself once and placed back on the floor without making a sound.

Charlie stared at him like he just raised a table with his mind. Well, he actually did.

“What the fuck?”

Chuuya seemed quite amused and her surprise was feeding his ego. 

“Why? How?”, Charlie asked.

Chuuya shrugged in response. 

“That’s the issue, no one really knows the true origin. But there are some people that carry these supernatural abilities. No reason why, I don’t have an explanation, it’s just there and I can use it. But it’s something different for everyone.”

Charlie tilts her head at him.

“Is it.. like.. genetic?”, she asked. It felt stupid to even ask that. They were talking about something supernatural after all. 

“Nah. I told you, I don’t know why or how. But I think you might have a time related ability.”

The girl didn’t respond for several seconds. She considered being stuck in a bad dream again, the stinging on her arm showed her it was reality quite promptly though. 

“Time related? I can stop time?”

“Well, I think it’s more of.. slowing.”

“I can slow time?”

“Kinda.”

“What ‘kinda’?”

“Well, we have to figure out how exactly that works. But when you were strolling through the streets, I felt the change in time. I am not sure if it’s something you do subconsciously and in what way it’s limited, because these things always have some kind of downside, but I am willing to help you figure out the details and how to work with that.”

He leaned back against the couch.

“If you work as my subordinate in the Mafia”, he added, “and I will obviously teach you the required skills regarding your ability and general capabilities.”

Charlie was listening closely. This conversation intrigued her and she was mindlessly playing with the ears of the plush bunny in her lap. Well, she just discovered that supernatural stuff was actually real. And she could slow time. Slowing time? How incredible fucking cool. 

“Well?”

“You actually want me to work for you? Learn from you?”

“Exactly. I am one of five executives in the organization and have already put in a good word for you.”

That explained the money. 

“You talked about me?”

“A little, yeah”, he responded with a smirk. 

“And you think I fit into that.. line of work?”, Charlie asked with some hesitancy.

Chuuya took some time to respond, shifting in his seat subtly. 

“Well, ‘fitting’ is probably a little much. But you have an ability, lived on the streets, are familiar with violence, can defend yourself and seemingly aren’t afraid of stealing. And you look innocent enough - sometimes at least - which can have its perks in some situations”, he explained and adjusted his hat mindfully. 

“I trust your judgement, I suppose. As long as it’s not back in the streets.”

“No back in the streets”, he reassured quickly.

“Okay then."So, how do I start, hm?”, she asked, taking a deep breath. Her mind was swirling with thoughts. 

“Getting you new clothes and other stuff”, Chuuya muttered confidently.

“What?”

“Can’t have you walking around in your mentor’s sweatpants.”

He had a point. This certainly wasn’t a fitting attire to show up in the Mafia with.

“I don’t have much money.”

“I’ll pay.”

Well, she could not find any arguments. Charlie nodded her head yes and Chuuya already rose to his feet.

“That’s why I was off work early.”

“To go shopping with me?”

“Of course”, he said with one of those signature smirks of his.

Chapter Text

Charlie sat on the ground, putting on the wet, worn out shoes she had worn last night. They hadn’t dried down, obviously, and she was met with the uncomfortable feeling of them slowly soaking her socks, which soured her mood subtly. 

“Ready to go, little thief?”, Chuuya’s voice appeared behind her as he adjusted his leather jacket and ran a hand over his shirt to straighten the fabric.

“Do you really have to take that bunny shopping?”, he added as his eyes fell on the plushie sitting beside her, his arms crossing over his chest.

Her head perked up and she held it closer to herself. 

“Yes.”

Chuuya sighed, though there was a hint of compassion in his gaze.

“I can give you a bag to carry the bunny around. Will earn you less stares, but it’s with you. Sound good?”

Charlie debated for a few seconds, taken aback how he managed to work around her stubbornness without crashing out or calling her childish.

“What bag?”, she muttered, standing up straight and feeling the shoes wet her socks immediately. 

Chuuya walked right back to his room before returning with a small kind of fanny pack, a simple black one. He held it out towards her: “That should fit. You can poke the head out.”

She accepted it and zipped it open, gently sitting the bunny inside and closing the zipper around the head to have it poke out. She then swung it over her head, making the strap sit on her shoulder with the bunny poking out around her hip area on the opposite side.

Chuuya nodded appreciatively and motioned for her to get going while handing her a simple sweat jacket to wear over the shirt.

“Might be a little cold”, he warned.

Charlie gave him a surprised look and nodded slowly, taking it from his hands and putting it on. They were quite a similar size, so no issue with the fit. 

With that Chuuya makes his way out of the apartment, glancing back at Charlie every few minutes to make sure she was keeping up. 

“You’re slow, you know that?”, he groaned.

“No, you’re just used to keeping up with people taller than you”, she grumbled as she reached his side. It annoyed her when people were walking so quickly she started sweating or feeling dizzy, which happened quite a lot in her current physical state.

“Excuse me?”, he gave her a dumbfounded look, “You’re getting used to my kindness awfully quickly. Don’t enjoy it too much, ya hear that?”

“My apologies, boss”, she mocked, “Just enjoy walking at a pace made for your height.”

“Will you stop with the height comments? I swear, I feel like I adopted some clone of Dazai.”

“You didn’t fucking adopt me!”, Charlie remarked and huffed, ”I am 18.”

“I practically did adopt you”, Chuuya clarified, raising his hand to count things he had done for her in the past 24 hours, “I have given you a change of clothes, my clothes, nursed up your arm, gave you a place to sleep with a roof over your head and fed you - also, I now will spend my money on clothes and other things for you! Doesn’t matter if you're 18 or not.”

He was walking next to her now, at least.

“I mean”, Charlie struggled to find a counter and decided to change topics, “Oh, whatever, just.. Who is that Dazai person you mentioned?”

Chuuya seemed to pause for a while, debating what he was willing to tell her and what to rather keep to himself.

“A former executive”, he began slowly, “and my former partner when he was still working for the Mafia. He was annoying me all the time and staring just as strangely as you always do.”

“Partner?”, Charlie mused, fighting the urge to poke his side, “And I don’t stare much.”

“Not romantically - just working, merely a colleague, you know”, he clarified, almost hastily, “and yes, you do stare that much.”

Chuuya halted in front of a clothing store and gestured for her to enter first.

“After you.”

Charlie raised an eyebrow and stepped into the store. Luckily, it wasn’t too crowded. That had always been a major worry for her since she was a child - crowded, closed rooms simply stressed her to the point of not even wanting to look around. 

Chuuya followed close behind and she knew his intention wasn’t to stress her with that as he seemed surprisingly patient to let her stroll, she still couldn’t shake the feeling of needing to hurry and pick something good. Something he approved of. 

But, frantically speaking, the store didn’t give her a lot to work with. It was more of a basics shop with pants in the same color featuring five different cuts while being otherwise boring. 

A white shirt. A grey shirt. A black shirt. No print.

Sure, they would do the trick, but actually being here to choose clothing she liked made her a little picky.

Charlie strolled through an aisle and pointed out some button up shirts.

“These would at least look sophisticated?”

“Do you want to look sophisticated?”, Chuuya asked simply.

“I would like the option, I guess. And I feel more comfortable in something close to a suit. No dresses.”

“If you prefer that, pick your size”, he responded, completely uncomplicated. 

She wasn’t used to being able to just pick freely. She always needed to consider the price tags of clothing items or was shamed for what she liked - yet this felt like a nice change of pace. 

She picked out a shirt, a black tie and a waistcoat with matching pants. Not quite colorful. Some necessities like socks and underwear.

“Jeez, you even dress similarly to Dazai”, Chuuya groaned, taking everything she picked out and draping it over his forearm. He noticed she did not have a lot of interest in the other clothing items around here and chose to head to the register.

“Well, sorry, I don’t know how your colleague dressed.”

He scoffed. “Whatever. It’s fine”

Her gaze flickered around the store. There was a small jewellery section around the checkout area and she felt herself staring for a moment too long, which led to Chuuya nudging her back subtly with his elbow.

“Nuh-uh”, he scolded.

“I know, I know, I wasn’t planning-”

“Just saying.”

She stood awkwardly behind Chuuya as he paid for her clothing and her heart stung as she listened to the price being mentioned, so her hand found the bunny sitting in the little bag on her waist, mindlessly fidgeting with the plushie’s ears. 

Chuuya thanked the cashier and grabbed the bag, motioning for her to follow him again.

“I can carry that too”, she offered.

"Nonsense. Why would I let you carry the bags?”

“Because it’s my stuff?”

“And?”, he dismissed her efforts, adamant about acting gentlemanly.

Charlie followed up behind Chuuya and he slowed his step to match her pace so that they were walking side-by-side again. Her gaze flickered to the ground again, her mind slowly shifting elsewhere as she zoned out.

The feeling of being out of place slowly caught up to her. Being cared for felt like a trap. And being in her current situation on her own, without the little girl beside her, simply was wrong. The whole thing caused guilt to burn up, simply for existing and being acknowledged. 

And this realization always had to hit her like a truck in the most random situations, making her go quiet and zone out. It bothered her just as much as the people she was with for suddenly acting so difficult.

Chuuya had to grab her wrist just so she wouldn’t walk past the next store in her trance.

“You good?”, he asked, his voice firm, yet carrying a hint of concern. He definitely noticed her shutting down.

Charlie hummed in response and waited to follow him into the store. He wouldn’t budge though.

“Tell me. You’ve done this a few times already”, he insists, “Especially last night. And I thought we improved that mood.”

“It’s nothing, really”, she groaned softly, “you can’t change anything. I was simply zoning out.”

“What can’t I change?”

She glared at him softly. They were just standing still on a sidewalk, in the middle of it, in everyone’s way. How couldn’t he make some space? Wasn’t everyone embarrassed to bother strangers or stand in someone’s way?

“Can’t we just go inside?”

“Charlie, come on.”

“It’s just me being stupid, okay? I miss my sister, I feel like I don’t deserve this and whatnot”, she rambled quietly, quickly, because if she spoke louder or more clearly, she would openly admit and stand to it. She didn’t, so she had to be quiet, embarrassed, ashamed of her words.

Chuuya reached out to her shoulder again. He never really got too close physically, but enough to prove he cared and wanted to provide some comfort.

“I guess it sucks getting over it, hm? That’s okay. We can go and get ice cream later? And I think you deserve some proper living after whatever happened to you. So, quit this self-deprecating bullshit, will you?”, he gave her a firm squeeze.

“I’m sorry, it’s annoying, I know-”

“Well, a little perhaps, but that doesn’t matter too much. It’s real for you and you may tell me when you start feeling this way. Just don’t bottle it up. Can’t have you doing something stupid to yourself again, understood? I’d rather have you plague me with your doubts.”

His voice was firm and he held eye contact the whole way through. Charlie admired his way of handling her and was grateful yet again, yet she felt a little pressured to humour him, which was still a difficult task.

“I’ll try.”

“That’s good enough for now. Now come on, let’s get you something casual. You get one more set of clothes as well as a pair of shoes, that’s it for now, though, okay? I can lend you something more in emergencies.”

Charlie approved with a nod and followed him inside. He seemed to sense her social battery declining and was now more helpful while shopping, picking out pieces and holding them up to her. She didn’t complain though - he picked a lot of things that also fit his preferences and she didn’t mind his fashion sense at all. 

She picked wide jeans with some details, a graphic tee featuring stars and a matching hoodie to go. She also didn’t miss the chucks.

There’s just always been a preference for stars within her.

As they stood at the register yet again, Charlie scoffed at the price, giving Chuuya a guilty look, which he dismissed immediately with a stern gaze.

“It’s nothing to me. You’re fine, really”, he reassured as he held the second bag and made his way out of the store. 

Charlie sighed yet again. 

“You earn a lot, hm?” 

“I suppose.”

Chuuya suddenly froze and stood in place, looking at someone standing not far from them.

His eyes were focused on a tall brunette standing a few meters across the street. The most striking thing Charlie noticed were bandages. But it wasn’t just a simple one on his arm, no, the entirety of his limbs were covered in them, along with the neck. She frowned subtly and she turned her head to the side to look at Chuuya, who was staring at him like he was some kind of hallucination, both eyes widened in surprise.

“Speak of the devil”, he muttered and hesitated in deciding if to walk up to him or in the opposite direction.

He hesitated a little too long though as the guy seemed to notice him as well now. His eyes lit up and he hurried closer. The beige trenchcoat he wore traced behind him as he retreated his hands from its pockets and opened them in an almost welcoming gesture.

“Why, Chuuya!”, he called, a little too loud for her preference, making her flinch. That guy was even less modest in public. How could one be so obnoxious?

“No”, Chuuya groaned, “what are you doing here, mackerel? Or shall I call you a traitor instead?”

His tone changed drastically to the way he had been talking to her. The gentle, even concerned guy that comforted her earlier seemed completely gone as he eyed the approaching brunette with growing distaste. He was practically hissing at him.

Yet he seemed somewhat taken aback. Like he knew him but hadn’t seen him in a while.

Mackerel, eh?

He had said that earlier. Was this the guy he had been talking about? Compared her with?

“I have a much better question - who is this little apprentice of yours?”, the guy asked in a light, teasing tone. Huge difference to Chuuya’s.

Charlie’s eyes widened as the attention shifted to her. 

“M-me? What?”

“Leave her out of it”, Chuuya huffed, stepping up subtly.

“Why, she’s quite adorable. Look at that bunny there!”, he knelt down and reached out for the plushie at the height of her hip.

Charlie retreated in a split second as he slowly reached for the bunny. Time seemed to slow for a moment when he knelt down as she took a step back and put her hands over it protectively.

The grin on his face faltered subtly, a hint of surprise crossing it for a split second, before his smug look returned and flicked back to Chuuya. 

“I see.”

Chuuya glared at him still, his distaste clear.

“Will you move on with whatever you’re doing here? You’re lucky I’m not in the mood to kill you right now, as I assumed you already were dead. Might have to make plans.”

“Come on, little slug, you’re happy to see me, admit it!”, he said, straightening back up and towering over the two shorter figures. 

He then reached out to grasp one of Charlie’s hands, cupping it in his own as he leaned forward, causing some of his hair to fall in his face. 

“I am Dazai”, he introduced himself in a charming voice, “say, have you ever thought about dying along with the love of your life?”

Chuuya’s hand flared up and swatted his arms away.

“Stop convincing women to try and join your stupid obsession with suicide!”, he scolded, an edge in his voice.

“But she’s quite cute! You need a haircut though”, Dazai remarked, eyes flicking to the chunky layers. 

Charlie was quite overwhelmed getting caught up in a conversation between these two who seemed to know each other incredibly well. This certainly was the colleague Chuuya was comparing her to earlier. She couldn’t quite grasp why he would think she was acting similar - no way in hell she would ever act this obnoxious in public. Was it meant to be an insult?

And the dressing part didn’t make any sense either. She picked out black colors. This Dazai guy was mostly dressed in beige and white, except for the waistcoat. Not even that made sense. 

She took a few moments to realize Chuuya hadn’t even objected to his remark and both pairs of eyes were now focused on her hair as if agreeing on the comment for once.

“I… I will keep this for now”, she muttered with a hint of red creeping up her face. It would take her a lot of courage to touch that hair after this was what Lizzy did to her. As silly as it might sound  - her hair was proof that she existed. And that proof was on her body, right at that moment. 

“If you say so. Just remember, if you ever -”

Chuuya huffed.

“No, you will leave her alone. We’ll be going now. And don’t you dare approach me or her again. You are still a traitor. And I now have the information of you being still alive.”

Dazai rolled his eyes and flicked his hand. 

“Fine, fine. You two be going. Still, don’t hesitate. I mean you as well, Chuuya”, he remarked with a subtle smirk before turning away with a wink into Charlie’s direction and marching across the street. 

Chuuya’s hand wrapped around Charlie’s wrist and he began walking straight into the opposite direction, pulling her along. He seemed quite distressed, face scrunched into a frown, no trace of his relaxed demeanor he carried around her remaining. 

After a five minute walk straight away from the shopping street they just were in, Chuuya seemed to slow down, his grip on her wrist loosening slightly as the other still had a firm grasp around the shopping bags.

“You okay?”, Charlie spoke softly.

Chuuya nods slowly: “Yeah, why?”

“You look… fed up. To say the least. I mean, that guy seemed irritating, but…”

“He is irritating. And I thought he was dead.”

“Is he a zombie or something?”

“What? No”, he let out a huff of amusement, “why would you think that?”

“Well, you can make stuff fly, why shouldn’t zombies exist?”

Chuuya opened his mouth to respond and closed it again, though. He hesitated for several seconds of walking next to her before giving up “I guess you’re right. But he wasn’t a zombie. Still old Dazai. Well, no. But.. mostly. And I don’t quite know why he was even there.”

“Mostly?”

“It’s complicated.”

“You sure he ain’t some tragic love story?”

“Will you finally drop that?”

“I don't know, he seemed happy to see you”, she spoke with a hint of a smirk on her face. 

“Oh, but he asked you to commit suicide with him.”

“He did what?”

“Did you even listen to him?”, Chuuya poked fun at her.

“I don’t know, he was weird, okay? And he called me cute”

He scoffed in response: “Oh, yeah, he is. Did you never get that compliment?”

“What if I didn’t?”

Chuuya shrugged.

“Why did you say I was similar to him? I didn’t see a lot of similarities, to be honest”, Charlie asked slowly, not sure if she should bring that topic up. 

Chuuya seemed to dislike her question and took a while to respond. 

“He didn’t always act like that. Well, he did, sometimes. But when he’s not bickering all the time he’s great at staring and being all mysterious. And you bicker sometimes as well. It’s a stupid comparison, honestly, but in the moment I just thought-”

“It’s fine, really”, Charlie interrupted gently, “I was simply curious. I get it might be difficult or too personal.”

“It’s not! Stop acting like we are super close.”

“You seemed to be.”

“I don't know”, he groaned in response, “Let’s just get these bags home and order some food for you. You’re too weak for my liking.”

“Ouch.”

“Come on, you can’t refuse food, can you? And you’ll be up for quite some physical training soon”, Chuuya explained while leading her back to the apartment.

“I’ve never been very capable physically”, Charlie admitted.

“We’ll see. Maybe it’ll change. I’m sure we can find something that suits you.”

A short walk later, Chuuya placed the bags with clothes next to the couch. Charlie was busy kicking off her wet shoes, looking down at her soaked socks with distaste.

“Could you hand me a pair of socks?”

A pair of socks hit the side of her head and she glared playfully at him.

“What? You asked me to hand you one.”

“ Hand. Not throw it against my head.”

“Same thing in my book”, he smirked as he flopped onto the couch with a sigh, taking out his phone to look for a place to order from.

Charlie remained sat on the floor and changed her socks before getting up to sit next to him. She sighed softly, feeling tired despite sleeping so much last night. 

“Did you enjoy it at least a little bit?”, Chuuya asked her absentmindedly.

Her eyes flickered up to his face. She couldn’t help her lips curling up to a soft smile.

“Yes. It was quite nice. And thank you very much for.. everything. Again.”

“I already said it was okay.”

Charlie rolled her eyes and sighed softly at his dismissal and walked across the room to sit beside him, leaning her head close, so that she was met with his scent.

“So, what are we eating?”

Chuuya glanced up at her, surprised how comfortable she was acting.

“What do you want to eat?”

“I don’t really care. Any food is good to me”, Charlie hummed in response.

“Pizza?”, he asked, studying her reaction as his eyes flickered across her face. He recognized her nod before moving on: “Which one?”

Charlie shrugged in response. She didn’t like deciding from a large set of options.

Chuuya rolled his eyes as he noticed her reluctance. 

“I’ll order pineapple for you if you don’t decide.”

“I don't mind pi-”

“ What?! ”

“I don’t mind-”

Chuuya set his phone aside and grabbed her by the shoulders.

“You can’t be serious-”

“Pineapple on pizza is fine, what do you mean-?”

He shook her gently by the shoulders. 

“So you are a psychopath! I think I’m gonna have to debate the fact of having you work for me again.”

Charlie laughed subtly in response, enjoying the stunned expression on his face. His forehead was scrunched up and he had a playful glare to his face.

“It’s seriously not the end of the world-”

“You are getting pepperoni, no arguments.”

“Pepperoni is overrated”, she remarked, raising a hand in defense.

Chuuya scoffed yet again and pushed her back against the couch with a gentle shove.

“Margherita it is then.”

Charlie chuckled softly to herself and accepted the choice. 

They sat on the couch for a while and Chuuya had put on a movie on the TV. Charlie watched the whole thing with wide eyes, the last experience she had watching TV had been ages ago, so this captivated her quite immensely. 

Chuuya’s arm was draped over the back of the couch behind Charlie, staying close, the two empty pizza boxes on the coffee table in front of them. He had an amused expression on his face any time he noticed her wide eyes, yet sometimes his mind seemed to wander off to a different place. 

That encounter had raised a lot of questions in his head and he failed miserably at making up his mind about most of them. 

He would report it to the boss, probably. But his first concern was getting Charlie introduced to the Port Mafia the following day.

Chapter Text

“You know, it’s quite embarrassing I’m only asking this now, but I need to know your full name”, Chuuya’s voice spoke without looking back at her as she hurried behind him, having some trouble to match his determined pace.

She jogged to his side and sighed: “Evans. Charlotte Evans.”

He grimaced subtly in response and his eyes flickered to her face with a bit of a questioning expression. 

“That’s a wild mix of names”, he comments, making Charlie roll her eyes.

“I know, it’s complicated”, she huffed as they walked around another corner. The streets seemed to get more gloomy around this part of the town.

This morning Chuuya woke her up early and she dressed up in the outfit more appropriate for working at the Mafia. The waistcoat hugged her torso and she nervously pulled the fabric into place every few steps, stressed about making an appearance at such a place. 

But the fact the bag with the bunny was around her shoulder again did not help, it in fact ruined the whole seriousness of the look and made her appear like an eleven year old that just cut their hair at home and had separation anxiety from their stuffed animals.

Especially beside Chuuya, who was wearing the same outfit the night she met him with the coat wafting behind him dramatically, she seemed just like the orphan he ‘adopted’.

“I’m listening.”

“Well, I was born in the UK, my dad was japanese, my mom insisted on giving me and my sister ‘normal’ names, just for us to move back to Japan when I was 7”, she explained, pausing shortly to catch her breath before adding more, “I was made fun for it around here a lot and people gave me different nicknames or tried to make it sound japanese, my dad refused to change it though, so now I live like-”

“Why did you think naming yourself ‘Charlie’ would help with that, though?”, he teased, suddenly turning to walk through an alleyway, making Charlie stop abruptly to return to walking behind him.

“I don’t know, I just always hated being called Charlotte and my dad insisted. It was a way to rebel and make it shorter”, she explained with a grumble. 

They took another turn right, walked through another street and eventually Chuuya stopped in front of a large, dark building that fit the gloomy aesthetics of the area around perfectly and probably played a big part in them. 

Charlie halted beside him, trying to conceal she was out of breath and even her sides stung painfully as she panted quietly. Why couldn’t they have taken a car or something? She had a thin layer of sweat covering her face after a short damn walk. She was so damn out of shape. And this guy wanted to train her? 

Good luck with that.

Her eyes flickered up towards the entrance and she couldn’t help but notice the men standing around. These guys all seemed to look the same though, dressed in the same suit, even similar hair cuts. She was about to scoff at them when she noticed another similarity - they all had guns holstered on their hips.

Chuuya didn’t seem to notice her stunned expression and walked right up to them with her trotting behind, a little intimidated. These had to be low ranking members, right? Guards?

The way they nodded their head respectfully or even bowed subtly as they noticed Chuuya approach confirmed her suspicions and the fact she actually was with a respected executive seemed to dawn on her finally.

Chuuya was completely different to how she observed him previously as well. Not as upset and hot tempered as when they met Dazai, neither the strangely gentle yet stern person she knew after living with him for barely two days.

He was in work mode, back straightened and well aware that he was now in the role of a superior as he passed them. And after seeing him beside these lower ranking Mafia members, she noticed he wasn’t just screaming ‘Mafia’, but also ‘wealth’ and ‘power’. 

The guards didn’t dare to speak up, yet they didn’t pay Charlie the same respect as they did Chuuya and she could feel the questioning, mocking eyes on her, which caused her shoulders to tense immediately. 

They passed the front desk next to the entrance and entered a seemingly endless hallway with countless doors scattering both sides and a bright light illuminating the room, making her feel even more nervous and self-conscious. 

Chuuya must have noticed because she felt a firm squeeze on her shoulder, undoubtedly by his gloved hand. 

“This is the main building of the Port Mafia and the only one you can enter without an ID badge or company of a member. Hence, most of the general and even ‘legal’ stuff is sorted out around here as guests can only step a foot into this tower”, he began explaining as they rounded a corner and Charlie was hit by another long hallway.

“I, and you too, are not gonna be around here much”, he nodded at another, older member that was dressed differently from all of the guards and had long, grey hair, probably higher ranking as well, before continuing, “which is why we are heading to the main quarters with all of the more present and important members.”

He pressed a button on an elevator and motioned for her to follow. 

“I will need to report something to my boss. In the meantime, you will be accompanied by some of my subordinates that will show you around and possibly give you some work. As you are not qualified to be an agent yet, you will have to deal with some paperwork and continue training for now.”

Charlie gulped softly - it was silly really, thinking that she’d be around Chuuya most of the time. Or all the time. Obviously he had more important matters to tend to. But the thought of meeting other members and being commanded around did not entice her greatly. She was intimidated enough by the gloomy environment of the building and organization - having to be around agents or workers stressed her even more and she began to doubt her decision of agreeing to this.

But - well - it was either this or freezing out on the street. Alone. 

So she just had to accept the situation she was in and swallow all of these insecurities. 

“Is today just gonna be paperwork then…?”, she spoke up shyly.

Chuuya shook his head in response. 

“No, we will start training in the afternoon. Nothing much for now, we’ll just try to get more information about that ability of yours and perhaps try to use it. But your training will vary from physical exercise to fighting to ability usage and other skills.”

The elevator door opened and it seemed like they now reached an even lower point, probably underground. Chuuya began walking again with Charlie behind him.

“I suck at every single thing you just mentioned”, she remarked.

“That’s why I am here to help you improve”, Chuuya dismissed with a wave of his hand, his steps echoing off the walls of the long hallway. 

“You sure I won’t just be your secretary..”

“You will be if you keep up that self-doubt”, he spoke sternly and raised an ID card to a door. They then took the next elevator and Chuuya pressed the button to close the door shortly after she stepped in and chose a number afterwards. 

They were going up this time. 

“We are now inside the building made for less legal and official matters. The executives’ main offices, training rooms and… other rooms are located around here, which means most of the important members are usually around here”, he sighed subtly, “I won’t go on explaining about the structures of the Port Mafia for now, you may ask the people I am gonna leave you with until lunch break if you are interested.”

“Structure?”

“Obviously, do you think we ain’t organized? There are different units, agents and factions. I do not know where you are gonna fit in yet, so you’ll be doing basic tasks and look around different units for now until I’ve made up my opinion about your skills.”

“So, secretary.”

That earned her another glare.

“Can you even read and write?” 

“Barely.”

Chuuya halted in front of a door, his demeanor still stern even though a hint of amusement crossed his face at her response. 

“This is my office. If there ever are any issues, you come here. Even though I can’t guarantee I’m gonna be around, you may wait inside. My orders. Also, you’re gonna meet me here after lunch break so that we can begin our training. I will also be handing you your ID at that time.”

He didn’t enter his office though and kept walking to another door not too far and opened it instead.

Inside sat two men seemingly pretty close to her age. 

One of them was dressed purely in a black - a dark coat reaching his knees and covering most of him. There was a white shirt layered underneath the coat and other than that only his skin and strands of hair stood out as less murk. His face was pale and appeared sickly whereas his dark hair was chopped almost as questionably as hers, white strands adorning his face in front. 

Charlie wasn’t particularly fond of his presence - his expression was just as unwelcoming as his appearance.

So, she shifted her gaze to the other guy who was now standing up and even walked up to her subtly with a gesture of his arms opening. 

His frame was slender and somewhat more colorful and welcoming, for a Mafia member. He wore a white shirt, olive colored jacket with a hint of a fur detail around the hood. The outfit definitely was less striking as his facial features which were a lot more evident due to the bandage adorning the bridge of his nose and colorful, red-ish brown hair framing them. 

Charlie had been staring for way too long already, causing a bit of an awkward silence as her tongue slipped.

“Is that supposed to make you look badass?”

The guy that stood closer to her froze and now had an almost sulky expression whereas the guy behind him had a somewhat amused glint in his eyes, which didn’t quite fit his depressing and intimidating appearance. 

Her comment earned her a nudge with Chuuya’s elbow and she cleared her throat, realizing her slip up. She bowed subtly, hands pressed to her side.

“I am…”, she paused awkwardly. Technically, she’d need to introduce herself with her last name. But she despised being called ‘Evans’. She hated being called Charlotte almost just as much and that already was her first name. But being called Charlie by these Mafia members was even more embarrassing. 

Everyone seemed to wait for her to go on and she couldn’t help her face heating up as her brain short-circuited. 

“E-ev.. Ch… Uhm…”, she stuttered, changing her mind every time she was about to choose. 

Her current behavior definitely didn’t help her already stupid reputation with the stuffed animal hanging near her hips and the stare she got from across the room only caused more embarrassment to swell up. 

“My name’s Evans. You may call me Charlie though”, she did it eventually, not daring to look up at Chuuya who was definitely face-palming beside her. 

“Nice to meet you, Charlie”, the red-haired guy spoke up. 

“I am Tachihara Michizo and this is Akutagawa Ryunosuke”, he introduced himself and motioned towards the guy in the back who hadn’t really moved a muscle and just seemed to quietly mock her childish behaviour. 

Charlie straightened her back and cleared her throat, pushing some hair out of her face to have something to do. 

“Well. I have important matters to attend to. Tachihara, I have told you everything you need to know yesterday, I expect you to look out for her”, Chuuya spoke up simply, glancing at Tachihara.

He earned a nod from Tachihara before turning around and walking out of the office quietly, closing the door with his ability without looking back.

Show off. 

There was an awkward silence immediately and Charlie had not yet recovered from her earlier mess up. The stare she got from the corner didn’t help much - like, seriously, he didn’t speak a single word yet, why was he even there?

“Alright, Charlie. Chuuya didn’t say much, except to… babysit you.”

Her eyebrows shot up.

“Excuse me? You look like you’re 16 or something, why would you babysit me?”

“I’m turning 18, alright! Also, you seem less mature than anyone around here”, he pointed at the plushie.

She huffed. There were so many people around here that were incredibly young - especially for high ranking Mafia members. 

“What was his idea of babysitting anyway?”

“You’ll see, can’t tell you yet.”

A woman with blonde hair suddenly stormed into the room, a clipboard pressed to her chest. She looked around and her eyes lit up as her gaze fell on the guy standing in the corner.

“Akutagawa-san! I have been looking everywhere to tell you I finished the report!”, she said and walked up to him quickly. She didn’t even acknowledge the presence of the other two people in the room. 

Akutagawa simply glanced at her with a nod and pushed himself off the wall taking the clipboard from her. She stood in front of him and stared at his face expectantly just to earn a simple nod with no praise coming from him.

With the clipboard in hand he started walking out of the room, passing Tachihara and Charlie without glancing back. The woman followed close behind, carrying the same ignorance towards the present people, solely focused on the man in front. 

As the door slammed shut again, Charlie’s eyes flickered back to Tachihara.

“Is he always like that?”, she muttered in a monotone voice.

Tachihara grimaced and hesitated. “Let’s just say most of the time, not always.”

“And that woman?”

“Higuchi?”, he snorts, “Oh, yeah, she’s obsessed with him. Don’t know why. But they build the command unit.”

“Command unit?”

“I’m.. practically his subordinate”, he gave in and rubbed his neck, “okay, I work directly under him.”

“And you have what position?”

“I am a member of the ‘Black Lizard’.”

Charlie stared quietly at him, waiting for him to go on, as if she’d known what that meant. 

“Oh, we kinda do every operation that requires a little more competence and trust but isn’t enough for someone actually high ranking to show up. Usually jobs involving assassination or raids and robberies.”

Charlie nods slowly in response. So this was serious stuff, even if he didn’t act like it was.

“Above that would also be the executives that are rather important for you to know. Usually it’s five, at the moment that’s a little complicated as there is a position that’s not occupied. Next to Chuuya there’d be Ace, Koyo Ozaki, Paul Verlaine and Chuuya, who you’ve obviously met. And-”, he leaned forward subtly, “I’d say he’s definitely the strongest and most respected.”

Charlie nodded subtly, taking the information in. 

“What about the fifth position?”

“Mori keeps it unoccupied in hopes of a former executive returning to the Mafia”, he explained as he reached down and got out a stack of documents, “anyway, we’ll move on with the task Chuuya told me to give you.”

Charlie tilts her head curiously and follows Tachihara’s motion for her to sit down.

“You will now do a report about the structure of the Port Mafia, different important members of all kinds of ranks, historic events and rules around here.”

Her expression soured subtly and she gave him a dumbfounded look, which earned her a smirk from Tachihara.

“Chuuya’s orders. You wanna make him proud, right?”

Charlie’s jaw tensed but she didn’t object. She’d already messed up enough, so she ought to stick to orders and do well for now. It must’ve been his order for a reason.

The next four hours Charlie spent flicking through the pages of files and occasionally asking Tachihara about details or things that wouldn’t make sense. By the time she finished with a multiple page essay about all kinds of stuff about the Port Mafia, she memorized practically everything regarding the Members, their abilities and other important events and traditions. 

Tachihara was just doing his own thing most of the time, though he would sometimes make remarks about her having to work like a schoolgirl memorizing historic events for a test. 

“Will you take a look at it?”, she asked Tachihara nervously.

“Nah, break’s almost over and I know all about this anyway, so, just show it Chuuya. Also, it would kinda be cheating.”

“How come you call him Chuuya and not Nakahara-san? You called other people by way more formal names”, she commented curiously.

“Oh, he’s always been Chuuya-”

“But he’s an executive?”

“Well, yes, but he doesn’t mind. Sometimes says it’s easier to yell during a battle.”

Charlie scoffed in response but she was kind of amazed by the fact he was doing that, behaving like that. 

“Anyway, go on, show Chuuya your work after break, I’m rooting for an A”, Tachihara spoke up and shooed her out of the room with rapid hand gestures.

Charlie got up with a grumble and stepped out of the room, quietly walking across the hallway to Chuuya’s office. Come to think of it, where else should she stay in the time being?

He hadn’t returned yet. Could she just head inside? Or was she supposed to sit outside? 

The clipboard was pressed against her chest as she glanced back at the other room, debating if she should ask Tachihara. But that would be embarrassing, he already showed signs of wanting her gone.

Well, guess she’d wait outside. No way she’d make that big of a fool of herself.

She turned around and pressed her back against the wall next to the office door with a sigh. With that, a big wave of exhaustion overcame her, finally catching up to her after she’d been running for so long.

Her back slid down the wall until she dropped to her knees, head hanging tiredly against her shoulder.

Was all of this a stupid decision? She’d never be able to work for anyone here. Even that report was a little unorganized. 

Her gaze flickered down to the page, judging her own work quietly. It wasn’t bad. But not very well done either. If his goal was to make her memorize every detail about the organization, he might have been kinda successful - but actually meaning this to be something useful and well written was ridiculous. 

Her hand grasped the bunny’s ears and stroked them gently as she sat in the corridor, mind wandering, feeling hopelessly out of space. Everyone seemed to fit in, despite not fitting the stereotypes - it just made sense for them to be there. And she was always out of place. Always had been. And she doubted that would ever change.

A shadow casted over her and she raised her head just to see Chuuya staring down at her with a questioning gaze.

“You look quite out of it”, he commented. 

She jumped up to her feet out of embarrassment of sitting on the ground for too long, yet her heart felt heavy still.

Chuuya studied her a little while longer before motioning for her to follow him into his office.

WIth the clipboard held to her chest she followed him inside the room. It looked like a regular office, honestly, nothing interesting. A desk, shelves, a couch, chairs behind and in front of the desk. It did have a bit of a fancier touch than  the other rooms she’d seen so far. 

“I don’t spend that much time here, so don’t judge it that harshly”, he murmured as he sat down, leaning back in his chair and placing the ankle of one of his legs against his knee, “How did your task go?”

At the mention of the task, she put the clipboard on the desk in front of her and looked at him with a broody expression.

“I finished it. But was that necessary? It’s not school, after all.”

“It was necessary for you to learn crucial information and for me to judge your reporting skills.”

“Come on, that was hardly a report-”

“Well, even if it wasn’t a report about a job or something, you must know how to structure this kind of stuff”, he glanced up at her while reaching for the clipboard, “And sit down already.”

She sat in front of him with her hands folded in her lap nervously, insecure about the writing, which inly got worse as Chuuya’s eyes flicked over the different pages, his expression giving her nothing to work with for judging if it was goo enough or not.

“It’s thorough”, he commented eventually, “the structure is fine, but not as good. Did you have time to read it over and change things?”

“Well, I read it again, but I wasn’t able to change much.”

“Took you a while, didn’t it?”

She scoffed: “Well, yes, but I had Tachihara there, who affected my focus negatively.”

“Oh? You couldn’t focus?”, his eyes flickered to her face and he smirked subtly.

“Not like that!”

“Sure”, he placed both of his feet back on the ground before leaning forward to her, “Anyway, this is good enough for now. I don’t plan on making you a secretary or something.”

He got out an ID card and placed it on the table in front of her.

“Now you shouldn’t be harassed by guards and enter some areas without my help.”

Charlie took it from him, looking down at her name on the card.

“We’re now done with the formalities. I am sure you are curious about what I have planned for your training.”