Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Fucking  hell."

Crisp afternoon air bit at the windows, setting a chilly atmosphere in a well lit study room. Niko sat at a desk, staring at an open journal of notes and studying materials. Finals were coming up fast, and he was doing his best to prepare for them. 

It was late January- January 27th, to be exact, and it was just over two months since he'd cut things off with Aizawa. Unfortunately, winter break hadn't been long enough for Niko to resolve all of his feelings for the older man, but they'd... shifted to something a bit more sinister. Hatred, he liked to call it, but denial as Atsuo would've said. Aizawa reciprocated that same emotion, which made it almost fun. Niko had no joy in seeing his face, but it had become a sort of fucked-up, unspoken competition to see how far under Aizawa's skin he could get without being too obvious. Not that he really actually cared about being noticed.

Snarky comments, sharp words, you name it, they exchanged them. Niko had started it, obviously, but Aizawa had grown more and more fed up with him until he started mirroring the immature grudge. It gave Niko plenty of satisfaction, seeing he had that effect. 

While anger and pettiness rode towards Aizawa, Niko had slipped into old bad habits. Not exactly all of them, but just some. When he was younger, even up until the last year, he'd struggled with very bad depression. Maybe it was the easy distraction or business of the last year, but it had gotten better. But after weeks of healing (mostly) alone in his bed? Yeah, that fucked him up again. 

The company of Hizashi and Atsuo was greatly appreciated, but at night, when it was just him and his thoughts, they all but consumed him.

In other news, after the car crash and healing and all the physical therapy, Niko had started the process of getting his motorcycle license. He'd talked about it with Hizashi, who had been cautious, but upon Niko's eagerness and intelligence on knowing how to ride (and learn even more) as well as to help pay for everything, he'd agreed. Niko got a new job at Midnight Brew, the cafe near UA, and started the training course. It had been hard, but he completed it with flying colors, and got his license in no time. Of course, Hizashi had to help him pay for the motorcycle, but he got all of his own gear and paid for the majority of the motorcycle as well. A Ducati Panigale V4 R, green 'n white. How he got so much money? Well, he'd been working 20 hours a week without fail. Stressful? Yeah, but having money was well worth it. And it was pre-owned by an older man who'd been trying to sell it for quite awhile.

He loved it. Riding was everything he dreamt of and more. 

His birthday - December 5th, had came and went well enough. He'd had a small gathering with Atsuo and Sei, as well as Hizashi of course. They hadn't done much, but Atsuo had gifted him a helmet for the motorcycle. Not a cheap one, either. It was high quality, with a bluetooth set and everything. 

He'd made a new friend as well. A male around his age at work. Though... Niko had definitely been picking up on a bit of flirting. Speaking of--

Niko glanced down at his phone, reading the time. 17:00. Work started in thirty minutes. 

He began packing up his things, tucking them neatly into his backpack (also new, from his birthday), and exiting the study room. UA was mostly empty at this time, only a few other students lingering around, studying or chatting. Some were probably waiting for rides home.

He exited the building, shivering as a cold breeze washed over him. It was mid winter now, snow speckling the ground lightly, clouds scattered in the sky. It wasn't snowing currently, and it hadn't gotten thick enough that he wouldn't be able to drive, but it caused a bit of an inconvenience. 

Crossing the street, Niko took a left down the sidewalk, his heavy boots crunching in the thin snow, crossing his arms in an attempt to block away the cold. Thankfully, his work wasn't far. Ironically, it was the same cafe that he and Aizawa had been to months ago, when they first went out to eat together.

What a fucking time. 

The cafe was ran by a friendly woman named Shino Sosaki. She was in her early 30s, and always wore her auburn-brown hair in a neatly cut bob. She'd hired Niko almost immediately, introducing him to his coworkers and doing most of his training, until a different coworker (and now his friend) took over. 

He walked into the cafe from the back entrance, clocking in and then going to the staff bathroom to change into his uniform. It wasn't anything crazy, just a pair of black jeans, a white long-sleeve shirt and a dark green apron that had his name on it. 

Making his way to the front, he was met with a familiar face. Jagged black hair, deep brown eyes, tattoos all over his arms and disappearing down into the rolled-sleeves of his shirt - Sero. He was Niko's favorite coworker, and the same one that'd been ("subtly") flirting with him since he'd helped train Niko. Lips curling into a smile, he waved at the other man, stopping in front of him.

"There you are. I was starting to think you called out on me," Sero's voice was playful, eyes glued to Niko, running up and down his frame with that shit-eating grin he always wore.

Niko fought off an amused smile, examining Sero. It had to be slow today, because Sero was leaning on the counter like he owned the place, and Niko glanced at a pair of customers sitting in the far corner. "Says you. If I'm remembering correctly, you're the one who always clocks in late."

Sero's smile only widened, flashing a cheeky grin, "Nuh uh."

Niko poked his shoulder playfully, "And you make everything you do look like a fire hazard. I'm surprised Sosaki hasn't fired you yet." He found Sero's gaze, who only looked even more triumphant by the attention. 

"Awe, are you watching me that closely, Niko?" The side of his lips twitched upwards into a smirk, teasing, his eyes scorching Niko. The younger man grabbed a rag, ignoring the warmth burning into his cheeks, and back to his side to wipe the crumby counter down. 

Niko eventually leant into it, giving in to the playful banter, "Well... I mean, look at you," His fingertip ghosted over the warm, tattooed skin of his arm, meeting Sero's gaze, "You're like a walking caution sign."

"Caution sign?" Sero pouted, shooting back, "If I'm a caution sign, how do you always end up right next to me?" 

Niko shook his head, almost in disbelief, and finally noticed faint buzz of coffee brewing at the coffee maker, So he is actually doing something. "Probably because someone always has to fix your half assed latte art," He shot back, bumping the tattooed mans shoulder. Sero chuckled, not responding until he crossed the floor, pouring the coffees into respective cups.

"Keep tellin' yourself that, Niko. We both know I'm irresistible." Sero flashed him a cheeky smile before slipping away from the counter, bringing the people their coffees. He left Niko standing there, hand stalling where he'd been wiping. 

Okay, maybe the flirting was... not-so-subtle, to say the least, and while Niko did think Sero was attractive, each time he found himself leaning into it, there was someone else on his mind. Aizawa. The dark haired man was written into his very skin now, his hands sometimes ghosting up Niko's face, lips pressing to his neck. It felt like cheating, despite Niko cutting things off. 

Maybe he was entertaining his own feelings by still talking to Aizawa, even though it was bickering and sass, but he still got that familiar burn of desire staring at him, that skip-a-beat if Aizawa ever leant a little too close, before correcting himself. It was infuriating that he couldn't simply eradicate a feeling from existence, but it was the unfortunate truth. 

Plus- He didn't even know if whatever Sero was asking for (if he was asking for something) would lead anywhere. So, for now, he let it happen. 

Thankfully, usually the evening shift wasn't nearly as busy as morning nor afternoon, so the two had no trouble keeping everything in order.

Once they were closing at 22:00, Niko busied himself with cleaning out all of the dishes and drying them. The long shift had begun to get to him, but Sero was an easy distraction. He made quick work of the dirty dishes, turning around to see what else he could do and nearly running straight into Sero, who's arm was extended towards him. "Fuck! Give a man a warning, Sero!" Niko's face flamed red as he jumped back in surprise, scowling at Sero, "What is it?"

Sero blinked at him, lips slowly splitting into a grin, "Sorry, yikes! You're so jumpy. I was just gonna ask if you have any plans after this."

Niko's eyebrows raised suspiciously, looking the other man up and down, "....No, why?"

Sero shrugged, turning off the coffee machines he had (probably) been cleaning, "Do you want to smoke for a few? I'm on my last few cigarettes and I figured you might be interested, if you do smoke."

Niko hummed, glancing aside. He'd had cigarettes before, but he didn't smoke regularly. He used to smoke a lot more frequently but then Sora found out and... yeah. "Yeah, that sounds nice," He agreed, "Where?"

"Awesome! I can walk you to your car," Sero suggested, flashing him a smile before turning back to the task at hand. Niko stared at his back for a moment before he snorted and shrugged. It wasn't exactly a question, so he silently got back to work.

By the time they got out, it was nearly 22:30 (a pretty quick closing, if Niko said so himself), and the night air was freezing. Niko changed into riding gear in the bathroom, shoving his uniform into his backpack, and exited through the back, locking the door. Sero was already waiting outside, wearing a thick black hoodie over his uniform, apron off and slung over his shoulder. He was holding a pack of cigarettes and a lighter in one hand. 

"Is that riding gear? I didn't know you fucked with motorcycles," Sero asked, eyes running up and down him slowly. The skin on Niko's face warmed, and he met Sero's dark eyes, shrugging again.

"Yeah, it is. I ride a Ducati," He gestured in the direction of the parking lot, and the two set off shoulder to shoulder, maintaining easy conversation and Sero lit the cigarettes, passing one to Niko.

"I can light my own," Niko joked, taking it from him and drawing in a slow hit of smoke. It had been awhile, the dizzying feeling washing over him like the warmth of a campfire, "What type are these?"

Sero chuckled, "Marlboro Golds. I'm actually surprised you smoke. And ride a motorcycle, for that matter. Not in the mean way, but you didn't seem like the 'edgy' type."

Niko handed the box back, flashing a skeptical look at him, "What does that mean?"

Sero shrugged, looking to the side briefly, at the glowing lights from a nearby building, "I don't know, you were pretty shy when I first met you, y'know? I didn't know you were into rule breaking and shit."

Niko snorted, "I just don't like people. I'm not shy." He took a drag of the cigarette, humming as he added, "I like your tattoos by the way. They're cool."

He eyed the dark lines, eyes following them up the tanned skin of Sero's forearm and where they peeked out just below his collar, almost a teasing sight. He blinked rapidly, eyes snapping up as he realized how hard he was staring. Sero was watching him with a lazy grin, raising his eyebrows as if questioning him. "If you wanna see where they go that bad, just ask."

Niko groaned, holding his free hand to his rapidly-reddening face. "Oh fuck off, that's- that's not what I was looking for, I was just looking at them!" He whined, though, he couldn't fight off the blush, looking away and hitting the cigarette. 

Sero burst into a giggly-laughter, echoing in the quiet night air, "I know, I'm just teasing you, Niko. You're cute when you get all flustered like that." The comment only made the situation worse, and Niko buried his face in his sleeve, all but whining incoherently. "Anyway," Thank god, "Thanks. I've had them for a few years now, but if you actually want a tour, I can show some off and tell you the meanings. I have a lot on my back and chest, 'n shit." Sero explained, making vague gestures to parts of his upper body as he spoke, giving Niko time to cool off. 

"Yeah, I'd like that." He only just managed to keep his voice casual, looking at the ones on the other mans arms a little more closely. Listen, being a virgin for years and then losing it in the most mind blowing sex? That did things to a mans sex drive. Who could blame him for being a little horny?

"Yeah?" Sero's eyebrow raised, and he tipped his head to the side, a smile sliding onto his lips, "Name a time, we can do it at my place. I can even show you some stuff I know on the guitar."

"Guitar?" Niko blinked, "I didn't even know you had one."

"There's a lot you don't know about me, Niko." Sero teased, poking his shoulder. There was a faint air of suggestion around the words, but Niko mostly ignored it, and the man added, "Seriously, if you wanna stop by my place after work.... Just let me know."

An irresistible smile crept up Niko's lips and he nodded, "You can count on it. Anyway," He breathed in a sigh, trying to clear the tension in his hands, "This is me."

They stopped in front of his motorcycle, and Sero eyed it up and down, whistling, "Damn. Nice, dude. What's the top speed on this bad boy?"

"I've only gone 330 kilometers per hour, but I think I could get him to go a little faster," Niko patted the bike seat with a fond smile, putting on his riding jacket and before securing his backpack, turning to Sero, "Thanks for the cig, and walking me here. I'll see you soon, Sero."

With that, Sero and him parted ways, leaving Niko to fasten his helmet and rev his bike to life, a deep, loud purr vibrating in his chest as it turned on, headlights lighting up the grass in front of him. 

Backpedaling a few feet, he clicked it into gear and twisted the throttle, easing out of the parking lot and onto the street. As he rode down, he passed Sero getting in his own car, and held up a hand, waving, before he put on a little more gas, turning onto the main road that led to the highway towards Hizashi's place.

The ride was 15, maybe 10 minutes, and the roads weren't busy due to the late hour, so it was an easy ride back. He had music blaring in his ears the whole time, warding off the inevitable pit that would grow in his stomach and eat him from the inside out. Parking in the driveway and setting his things down in his room, he slid off his helmet and riding clothes. Hizashi was already in bed, so he didn't bother him, putting on comfortable clothes and sitting down at his desk to finish up some more studying. 

To be completely honest, Niko was genuinely exhausted. Working a lot was a huge pain and took up a lot of his time and energy, but he was so money oriented that it was almost worth it. Almost. Maybe if it weren't finals, then it would be worth it, but for the moment,  it was draining him. Just make it to the end of finals. 

His own thought made him scoff aloud. Realistically, he could call out, but he almost always enjoyed the time he spent working with Sero, and the repetitiveness  of his work was therapeutic. Rarely were there night-rushes, which was primarily what he worked, so for the most part, he just got to enjoy his coworkers company and make coffee. 

Unfortunately, night was also the time he was most likely to be productive and focused, so spending five hours working instead of studying left him drained and made it harder to focus post-work, resulting in shorter nights and longer days of studying before work. He rarely got much free time, aside from weekends and Wednesday, since he worked all other days. Occasionally, he'd pick up a shift for a non-scheduled day if Sosaki was short staffed, but he typically avoided it as best he could. 

After an hour of (failed attempts at) studying, he retired to his bed, near-conking out instantly. 

Chapter Text

The following Monday, Niko was back to his regularly scheduled havoc-wreaking. 

It was painfully clear to everybody in his class that whatever kinship that Aizawa and Niko had shared the semesters prior was left to burn, because Niko had zero politeness and wasn't afraid of him like the rest of the class was. 

"Could you be any more fucking vague?" Niko muttered under his breath as Aizawa spoke about an assignment. Atsuo's head snapped towards him, shoving him with a pointed look, to which Niko looked up with a cross glare, whisper-hissing, "What?!" 

"Kurosaki and Kasai. Do I need to separate you two or can you learn to shut your mouths?" Aizawa's frigid voice cut through the air like a blade, and Atsuo's jaw locked tighter, staring at Niko with pleading emerald eyes. Tension burned in the air between Niko and Aizawa, dark brown eyes locked with black, before he went back to doodling in his notebook, breathing a soft curse of annoyance. 

He got a few looks of disbelief from Aizawa's mild reaction to his outward disrespect from student, but they were distracted by the professor continuing his lecture. 

"As I was saying," Aizawa drawled. Niko could feel his glare from a mile away, but didn't bother looking up, "You fourth years are doing finals will have finals from the 14th through the 18th. For my class, you only have a small oral exam that you'll do on a painted piece. Electives won't have important finals, it's mainly for grading purposes. That being said," He glanced in Niko's direction, making a brief, electrifying contact, "You will have five finals throughout the week. Not including mine."

Aizawa continued to talk about when the finals were due, when they'd get the grading rubric for the art and oral piece, etcetera, until he finally let them go to review one of their (now graded) assignments on oil painting history. 

Niko had scored a perfect score, despite his alleged disdain towards Aizawa, plus extra credit for the additional question, but Aizawa had still marked comments all over the page - notably, not lowering the grade because of them. Fucking nit-picker. 

Niko skimmed over them. A point at a fucking letter that was written messily, other dumb comments like that. Unfortunately, there was an actual comment written on the back.

Kasai, see me after class today. Skip and consider your grade lowered.

For what reason? Anyones guess was as good as his, but he knew for damn sure that it didn't have to do with grades. Looking up from his work, Niko made direct eye contact with Aizawa, who was staring at him like a hawk, his void-dark eyes burning into Niko with a scorching intensity. Niko held that stare with an icy one of his own before scoffing and shaking his head, crumpling up the page and tossing it in the trash-can with a pointed glare at Aizawa. 

The professors jaw ticked, looking at his computer, but Niko couldn't care less. He only looked down at the other page in front of him, an assignment, and began writing on it. Niko let his irritation simmer in his gut for a moment longer, before he tried to focus on what he was writing. Much to his disappointment, Aizawa hadn't seemed to be at all affected by anything that had taken place or even the fall out between them. 

He looked the same as he always did. His smooth black hair was pull back, sharp jaw lined by neat stubble, the same length as it always was, skin clean and blemish-free, aside from the tiny freckle on his jaw, almost entirely concealed by the facial hair. 

His outfit was also not out of the ordinary for him. The same button up shirt, a coat Niko had once seen hanging in his closet... Blah blah blah. Tearing his gaze away, Niko found himself meeting Atsuo's vivid green gaze. His eyebrows were knit together, studying Niko as he chewed his lip, a sign of anxiety for him. 

"What?" Niko went hot, eyes narrowing, "Why do you look so anxious?"

"Nothing," Atsuo sighed, his fingers lacing together, "I'm just worried for you. I don't want your.... Um. Y'know, to interfere with your grades. Or mental health." He flashed a glance at the paper crumpled in the trash-can, "Clearly it's been bothering you."

Niko scowled at him, a bad-tempered scoff blowing past his lips before he could stop it. "It won't. I'm still getting perfect scores, he's just starting shit from nothing." He took a deep breath, eyes wandering in Aizawa's direction, "If anything, it's fun for me."

The comment didn't see to soothe Atsuo's worries though. "Are you sure you're not just entertaining your feelings for him?"

The question caught Niko off guard, and he was stunned into silence for a few painful seconds. His instinct was to shoot back a defensive reply, but he didn't want to take out any anger on Atsuo, so he just shook his head, swallowing his irritation. 

"Niko, it's okay if you're not over him yet." Atsuo spoke softly, emerald gaze reflecting Niko's own doubt, "I know you don't want to hear it, but it's not a quick process nor one that you can rush. You don't have to pretend, but you shouldn't entertain something that will end up slowing you down in the long run."

Silence, again. Niko didn't know how to respond to that. Part of him was still clinging to the control. He didn't want to accept that he would probably be the main one getting hurt, so he just kept getting under Aizawa's skin so he didn't have to face it. Healthy? No, but he didn't have the energy for anything else at the moment. 

"Just... Keep that in mind, okay?" Atsuo finally asked, "And call me if you ever wanna talk about it. You know my lips are sealed."

"Thank you." Niko offered him a genuine smile, but steered clear of the advice that the two-toned male had given him, "I appreciate it, Atsu."

Niko changed the subject to Sei and other aspects of Atsuo's life shortly after, and they worked in an easy, casual conversation. It would've been more comfortable if Niko could relax, but he could feel Aizawa's eyes on him, feel his burning heat as if he were right beside Niko. It wasn't.... Invasive, or uncomfortable, per se, but it wasn't something he wanted to face just yet. 

Class ended and Niko began to walk Atsuo to the door, planning to back in once the door shut, but a firm hand on his shoulder stopped him in his tracks. He didn't have to turn to recognize Aizawa's unmistakeable touch, the way his cologne crept over Niko, making his entire body buzz with an intense sort of energy. 

He shoved the hand off of his shoulder and snapped, "Fuck, you're impatient. I'm not ditching you, asshole." 

Aizawa didn't respond, but his hand didn't return as Niko exited the room, dragging Atsuo along beside him. Stumbling forward, Atsuo chortled, "You should've seen the look on his face. Seriously, Nik, you're so bold. I can't believe he's not failing you for that alone."

Niko grinned, glancing at the closed door behind them, "Oh, I can imagine. Anyway," He attempted to cool his body of the fire burning through his veins by shaking his hands a few times, "I'll talk to you when I get out, or after work, if this takes awhile. I might go in early, I think Sero needs an extra set of hands."

He'd gotten a text earlier from the black haired man talking about how horrible this shift had been, and Niko didn't mind skipping the wait and just coming early if he was needed.

"Sounds good," Atsuo gave him a warm, reassuring smile, noting with a wry look at the door, "Good luck. Let me know if you need anything." 

Niko nodded, turning on his heel and sucking in a slow breath before half-shoving the door open. Aizawa was leaning against one of the desks. His hair was down now, sleeves rolled up with his arms crossed in front of his chest like he was preparing to lecture Niko. He probably was

Sparing himself the effort, Niko locked the door, leaning against it silently with his arms folded in front of his chest. Go ahead. Tell me whatever bullshit you're going to. 

"...Kasai."

Really? Last names? Ignoring the flash of pure heat- irritation- that seared through him, Niko raised his eyebrows, prompting him to continue. 

"I'm not trying to start anything with you. I simply noticed that you've been slacking off more. I know what you're capable of and I know when you're not putting it all into your work." Aizawa spoke coldly, his voice a guard, expression equally as apathetic, "I will be marking you down in the future if I continue to see this trend. Emotions can't be a factor of this class and I will not stand by and watch you blow everything up."

So I blew everything up? Niko's jaw tightened and locked in place, still refusing to speak to him. He sighed, and Niko felt a tide of resentment rise in his gut, pounding at his throat, begging to shout all of his thoughts at Aizawa, but he held his ground. He wore an ice cold mask like it was glued to his face, matching Aizawa's energy, but there was an intense, uncontrollable torrent that he knew all too well. The tension, the electrifying charge in the air... The deafening roar of unquenchable, flame that never quite went out. A simmering flicker that instantly exploded into white-hot wildfire, scorching every inch of his body, consuming him. 

"That it?" He asked curtly, picking at his chipping black nail polish. The two words were the only two he could say while maintaining that mask. 

Silence on the other side, and then, another sigh, "Yes." 

Niko whirled around, unlocking the door and slamming it on his way out. 

That interaction was still replaying in his mind like broken clock-hand, striking the same cord every time, an annoying bell every time it replayed. 

"...Earth to Niko?" Sero waved a hand in front of his eyes, eyebrows drawn together, "You okay, man? You're spilling everywhere."

Niko blinked, startling out of his thoughts, the perfect replication of Aizawa's eyes burned into his brain. "Y-yeah, sorry. I'm just distracted." He blinked a few more times, shaking out his hair and looking at what he was doing. 

"Oh, fuck!" He whispered. He'd accidentally poured coffee all over the floor, overflowing from a cup that wasn't even named. "Sorry, Sero. I'll get this cleaned right away." He reached over to grab a rag from underneath the counter, but Sero caught his wrist, still clearly concerned. 

"Heyhey, slow down, mister." He protested, "If you wanna take a break to collect yourself, that's totally cool. I could tell you've been off since you got here." 

While Niko appreciated his concern, more time alone with himself was the last thing he needed, so he just shook his head, gently pulling his wrist from Sero's grasp and beginning to clean up the dark liquid, "No, seriously I got it. I'm sorry about that."

"It's okay, no worries. I'll get those orders out." Sero waved him off with a small smile, putting together a fresh cup and carrying it out to the person studying at one of the tables, already eating a pastry they'd ordered earlier, "Can you watch the register?"

"Yeah, I got it," He responded. Embarrassment made Niko's ears hot, but he made quick work of the mess, wringing out the excess in the sink and tossing the rag into a bucket in the back before returning to the front. Running a hand through his hair, he exchanged a nervous smile with Sero, who grinned right back, flashing him a cheeky wink. 

He stood at the register, his eyes skimming over the customers he could see. There were only a few people in the downstairs area, but he assumed the study space in the upper floor was busier. Most of the people still lingering were from the college a few blocks down, or had gotten off of work in the area. 

UA was in a nicer (but busier) area of the city. Since it wasn't just his school, but also a college not far, there were a lot more students there, and there was a park nearby. It got busier in the evening when people came to walk their dogs or grab a bite after work, and given that Midnight Brew was the only cafe and study space open until 21:00, they got more customers than one might expect. 

Sero was back in just a few moments, leaning against the counter a little too closely to Niko for it to be casual. He tipped his head to the side, examining him. 

"...What?" Niko looked away nervously under the intensity of his stare, "Is there something wrong?"

The other mans lips curled upwards into a light-hearted smile, "No, nothing. I'm just curious what's got you so worked up," He could hear the curiosity in Sero's voice alone, and his searching gaze only made Niko flush a little, unable to hold eye-contact. There were a few seconds of silence, Niko only reddening more, to his dismay, air not tense but almost.. Electric?

 "You don't have to tell me, obviously." Sero chuckled after a moment, looking away and breaking the tension, "Sorry, didn't mean to make you uncomfortable. You're cute when you're nervous." That's getting familiar. 

"Oh, when I'm beet-red?" Niko let out a breathy laugh, looking up at his coworker for a split second. They were close enough that he could smell the cologne on Sero, stronger and more wood-y than Aizawa's.

His smirk widened, and he nodded, teasing, "It looks good on you, Flare."

Niko blinked. It'd been awhile since Sero had called him that. It'd started as a joke, because his last name, Kasai, meant flame, and Niko would always go bright red whenever he got embarrassed or messed something up, but Sero hadn't really used it much once Niko said that he could just call him by his first name.

Unable to control it, Niko chuckled softly under his breath, "Still sticking with 'Flare'?"

"Well, I mean, look at you," Sero's voice was soft, almost, almost suggestive, "You're burning. You get flustered so easily, you're like a hot mess."

"Oh, trust me, it gets a lot worse than this," Niko couldn't help but lean into the flirtatious behavior, their gazes meeting as Sero raised his eyebrows.

"Yeah? Maybe you should show me-" Sero cut his suggestive words- off sharply as he glanced to the side, clearing his throat and straightening off the counter. Niko did the same, only reddening more, to a vivid crimson. How had he not noticed someone come in? His eyes snapped to the customer standing there now, putting on a well-practiced smile as he cleared his throat, "Hi! How can I-" The words abruptly died in his throat as his eyes landed on fucking Aizawa, who was looking between him and Sero with narrowed eyes, akin to chips of dark ice.

For fucks sake. He stood at the register, dead silent, studying Niko before his sharp gaze landed on Sero. If he had been surprised to see Niko, he didn't show it, instead glancing at Sero, who still seemed a little smug, in Niko's opinion. His tone was flat, cold, even moreso than normal, and he was still all but glaring at Sero. Is he jealous? "Can I just get a medium-"

"362." Niko interrupted, voice cold. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Sero staring at him like he'd grown a second head, but he ignored it. 

Aizawa tore his gaze from his coworker, brows drawing together ever so slightly. "...A medium black-" 

"Three. Sixty. Two." Niko hissed through his teeth, "I know what you want. Pay."

Aizawa's gaze bored into him a moment longer, and then pulled out the yen, handing it to Niko. Their fingertips brushed as Niko took it, the soft graze of his skin sending volts of scorching lightning up his arm. Neither of them said another word, Niko sliding the receipt across the counter and turning his back to Aizawa. 

The urge to turn around to see if he was still standing there seized Niko, but he ignored it, sucking in a slow breath through his teeth and meeting Sero's bewildered, perhaps mildly concerned gaze. "Do I wanna know what that was about?" He asked, stepping closer and speaking on a low tone, one only for the two of them. 

Niko shook his head, "Just someone I'm not a fan of."

Sero's eyebrows raised in disbelief, "You memorized his order."

Niko flashed him a glare, brushing past to start the coffee, "It's just black coffee. It's not hard to remember." He got started on the drink, turning and leaning against the counter as it heated. Sero raised his hands in surrender, and although Niko could see curiosity flickering through his brown eyes, the other male didn't ask again, only offering to take the coffee to Aizawa so Niko could stay on the register. 

Niko tried not to look in Aizawa's direction once he handed the coffee off to Sero, keeping his eyes glued to the pastry display on one of the counters, arms folded in front of his chest.

The rest of his shift was more of the same flirting, then cleaning up as they closed up for the night. They were out by 22:30, Niko walking alone to his motorcycle. 

The ride home was quiet. He didn't put on music, which was unusual for him, just listening to the wind and the growl of his vehicle. Eventually, he pulled into the driveway and let himself into the house, heading straight upstairs and changing out of his riding gear.

He was just sitting down at his desk to look at a study guide when there was a knock on his door. In all honesty, he hadn't even known Hizashi was still awake. "Come in!" He called, turning in his chair as the door opened quietly. 

Hizashi stepped inside. He was wearing pajamas, and looked tired. "Everything okay?" Niko asked, tipping his head to the side curiously. 

"Yeah, yeah I just figured I'd let ya know someone stopped by earlier looking for you," Hizashi explained, "She didn't tell me her name, but she seemed kind of off. Maybe drunk?"

God damnit. "Umm, yeah, thanks for telling me." Niko glanced at his computer, a familiar cold fear trickling into his fingertips and seeping up into his chest, "Let me know if she starts stopping by more often. I don't want to see her."

Hizashi stepped closer, and Niko looked at him again. He looked mildly concerned, "Is it your mother?"

"Probably." He admitted quietly, unable to hold Hizashi's gaze, "I don't wanna cause you any trouble, so if it starts getting annoying-"

"If it starts getting annoying I'll call the police on her for trespassing." Hizashi interrupted firmly, "You're not goin' anywhere kid." His hand ruffled Niko's hair, a warm smile on his lips, "I like having you around."

A part of Niko's anxiety eased, but he could only offer a weak smile in response, and Hizashi said goodnight before he left to go to bed. 

Instantly, once the door shut, he dropped his head into his hands, groaning to himself. He was already stressed out enough with all of his school work, and Aizawa-- his mother was the absolute last thing he needed right now.

Chapter Text

Okay, don't get Niko wrong- Studying was better with two people.... But if it was just him and Atsuo in a room, well, they tended to get side-tracked. 

Niko was so stressed out that he ended up bringing up Aizawa, and... Well it delved into a whole conversation about him;

"..And, I dunno, Atsuo. Like, I can tell he's trying to provoke me too, and it's not that I hate it, but it's so frustrating, y'know?" Niko glared at the grain in his desk, his fists curling into balls, fingernails digging into his skin with a hot, pricking pain.

"Nik, I know you're frustrated, but.." Atsuo looked hesitant, but Niko could see the sympathy in his eyes, "I mean, he didn't start doing that until you started provoking him. You know I love you to bits and pieces but it's very clear that you're the one who started the... tension or whatever."

Niko stayed silent at that, and Atsuo eventually added tentatively, "Are you sure it's not because you like the attention?"

The words struck Niko right where they hurt, his eyes narrowed to fiery slits as they snapped up to stare at Atsuo, defensive anger flashing through his system like a series of consecutive detonations, "What?"

Atsuo raised his hands in defense, but he still looked stubborn on his words, not backing down, "Look, Niko, I've known you for years, and I know how you act. I know who you are. It might not feel good to hear right now, but I can tell you feed off of the attention from him and the fact that you can even get a reaction from him. I don't know if its still a special feeling to you, but I know its wearing you out." He took a breath, adding as his lips curled into a small smile, "You can be mad at me, but I don't want you to ignore that."

Niko processed the words slowly, gaze lowering to stare at the desk. Yeah, he did like that he could get Aizawa to react... But to hear that it was just another way he was seeking the mans attention was somehow shocking to him. Fuck. 

"But it feels good." Niko's voice felt weak in his throat, the protest even sounding pitiful to himself.

Atsuo was quiet. "Just think about it." He offered softly, "You don't have to get over him this fast. Just don't let yourself live in denial."

That conversation floated around in his head for the rest of the day, and even into work. He barely even felt conscious, even when Sero was rambling his ear off when closing up the cafe for the night.

"Hey, are you okay?" Sero asked, leaning closer as his his eyebrows knit together, "You've been a little off all day."

Niko nodded, clearing his throat, "Yeah, sorry, I've just been thinking a lot." He shut the door behind him, locking it and shivering as the cold night air bit at his fingertips. Turning around, he leaned against it, examining Sero for a moment. The other male was standing in his hoodie, jagged black hair ruffled from the wind, his dark eyes glued to Niko with burning curiosity. 

"About anything in particular?" Sero asked, his tone dropping just a tad, a particular lilt. Niko knew it well from the time he'd spent with Sero, the flirty edge. 

Niko's lips curved into a grin, pushing himself off the door, almost sending himself off balance, "Wouldn't you like to know, charmer?"

Sero caught him by the shoulders, a sly smile playing at his lips, "Charmer?" He echoed, dark eyes flashing, "Awe, you really think so, Flare?"

Niko pulled himself out of Sero's grasp, going hot, "Stop calling me that, you know it gets to me. You're cheating, dickhead." He giggled despite himself, casting a cheeky grin over his shoulder as he walked towards the employee parking lot, "Why don't you let me walk you to your car this time?"

Sero jogged to catch up to him, his words low and playful, "I know, that's the point." He paused, and then added with a cocky purr, "Sure, if you're really that desperate to spend more time with me."

Niko shoved him, ear-tips glowing red, "Fuck off. You know that's not-" "Yeah yeah, whatever, Flare. Keep tellin' yourself that." Sero covered Niko's mouth with a hand, cutting him off as he shook his head in a matter-of-fact way.

Niko pried his fingers away from his mouth, revealing the devilish smile underneath, whispering, "Race you to the car."

Sero reacted faster than Niko could've even expected, lunging forwards and getting a split second of head start before Niko chased after him, lungs burning as he pushed himself after his companion. 

The run wasn't long, but Sero beat him there by a few seconds. Niko panted, catching up to him and yelling from a few feet away, "H-hey- that's cheating! You got a head star-!" He was abruptly silenced as he slipped in a patch of ice in the parking lot, sliding towards Sero at full speed, crashing into him and effectively knocking them both over. 

Niko groaned, his hands burning from hitting the pavement underneath him. Sero, however was... convulsing? Alarm flared in his eyes and he shook the man by his shoulders, knees on either side of his hips, "Sero?? Are you okay? Fuck, I'm sorry, I should've slowed down." Niko tried to pry his hands away from his face, but it was no use, fear glowing bright in his eyes, until-

Is he fucking laughing? The hysterical giggles were now loud enough to explain why he was twitching now, and Niko groaned again, shoving his hands away from his face harder, "Hey, you scared me." He pouted, looking at Sero's rosy face. He was barely recovering from the laughter, but as he lowered his hands from his face, Niko felt them come to rest just above his knees, startling him. 

"You're so annoying." Niko tried to sound serious, but his own smile gave him away, and Sero only laughed. His hand placement was sending butterflies racing in Niko's stomach, blushing rather violently from both running and .. well. He was essentially sitting on top of Sero's lap, with his hands on his legs. He leaned down, getting far closer. Sero's eyes dropped to his lips, eyes flicking rather rapidly between his eyes and lips.

There was a heartbeat of silence, and Niko whispered teasingly, breaking the tension, "You should probably get off the floor before your clothes get wet from the ice." You're not the only one who can tease.

He stood up off of Sero, dusting himself off. Sero popped up a moment later, and Niko turned to him, "I should get going, I don't wanna get home too late."

Sero nodded, and Niko thought he saw disappointment in his gaze, but if it really was disappointment, Sero didn't say anything about it. "Yeah, that's true. Be careful on the ride back, yeah?" He gave Niko a warm smile, poking his shoulder, "Careful on the ice. Can't have you crashing into anyone else."

Niko smiled as well, his eyes lingering on Sero's before he began to turn away. To his surprise, a wave of disappointment crashed over him to be leaving a person who made him laugh so much, and he hesitated, foot hovering where he had begun to step. "Actually," 

He whirled around on his heel, a sly smile adorning his lips, "Do you have any plans tonight?"

Sero's face lit up instantly, opening his passenger door with a dramatic bow, "Only the ones with you, Niko."

There was something in the way that Sero always said his name, something that betrayed not an infatuation but more like lust. And it certainly wasn't unwelcome. Niko slipped into the seat, clicking his seatbelt into place as Sero opened his own door. The interior smelled faintly of cigarettes and cologne. It wasn't an unpleasant combination, but it was new. 

"My place isn't far, don't worry." Sero cast him a sidelong smile as they pulled out of the parking lot, "I can drop you off here later. You wanna put on some music?"

"Is that even a question?" Niko joked, taking the aux cord and plugging his phone in. He hummed, scrolling through his playlists and selecting one specifically. The first song that came on was, to say the least, suggestive. 

Sero was right- his place was only a few minutes away. They pulled up to a tan apartment inside of a locked gate with wooden stairs leading up the building to a wrap-around balcony, doors lining the wall. It almost looked like a hotel building, but he could tell by the space between the doors and the shoe racks that they were apartments.

Sero led him up to the second story and around the side to apartment 29, where he unlocked the door with a key and opened it, giving Niko a teasing smile, "Go ahead, Flare. Tell me what you think." 

Niko rolled his eyes, taking his shoes off and stepping inside. It was small, but it was nicely decorated and clean. The main living space was a rectangular area, with two doors on the left leading to, most likely, a bathroom and a bedroom. He turned around, surprised, "You don't have a roommate?"

Sero shook his head, "Nope. It's just me here." He stepped inside too, locking the door behind him, "Do you want to chill in my room? I can show you my guitar?"

Niko's head whipped towards him, having been looking around the room. His eyes lit up, having completely forgotten that he played guitar, questions spilling from his lips like liquid, "What songs do you know? Do you sing? Are you in a band, or... Oh, do you know any other instruments?"

"My god, slow down, slow down," Sero laughed, waving his hands, "I'm not that good. No, I don't sing, and no, I'm not in a band. I also don't know any other instruments."

Niko laughed too, albeit nervously, "Sorry, I just don't know anyone who plays instruments. Can you play me something?"

Sero nodded, grinning and grabbing Niko by the wrist, essentially yanking him into his bedroom. Niko yelped in surprise as he was dragged to the bed and sat down on it by the other guy. "Someone's excited," Niko noted with an almost-giggle, interlacing his hands in his lap as Sero retrieved a deep brown guitar, and sat down next to Niko.

"Do you have something specific you want me to play?" He looked up at Niko, fingers already running along the strings, dark eyes all but sparkling with excitement. 

Niko paused, humming lightly to himself, "Hmm.. Do you have anything that you've made?"

"That's all you had to say, Flare," Sero beamed, clearing his throat and looking down at the guitar. Niko sat silently, looking between him and the guitar. 

Sero started, Niko listening attentively. The music was rich, a beautiful melody that he'd never heard before. Live music wasn't something he'd ever really heard, aside from a few bigger concerts in his life, but it was beautiful to hear. His heart-rate quickened, his own molten brown eyes meeting Sero's dark, almost black ones. He gave Niko a smile, one that almost seemed secretive, like it was just for the two of them, and continued to play. 

It went on like that for a few more minutes before he stopped, looking up expectantly. Niko beamed at him, "That was amazing! Not that good, my ass. How long have you been playing?"

"Since I was a kid- Fuck, maybe.. I dunno, 12? I've always been more musically inclined than artistic," Sero admitted, setting the guitar aside and scooting a tad closer to Niko. 

"Hey, music is an art too," He protested, scarlet creeping into his features at their proximity, the attentiveness of Sero's gaze, "I always wanted to be a singer as a kid, but I like art more now."

Niko laughed, adding hastily, "But I'd be awful anyway. I like painting and sketching."

The thought of art reminded him almost painfully of Aizawa. The painting he'd done of Niko, the softness of it. He glanced away, clearing his throat.

Sero examined him a little closer, his voice slow, "You always go somewhere when you talk about art."

Niko grew flustered, looking away, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"C'mon now, I've had my fair share of evil exes. Just don't let it ruin a hobby." Sero prodded his chest playfully, "You should show me some of your art sometime."

Niko smiled nervously, "It's not related.. But, yeah, I could show you some."

"Have you ever tried?" Sero asked, his eyebrows raising.

"What?" He blinked, "Tried what?"

"Singing." Sero prompted curiously, his eyes not burning but just warm. It wasn't the same intensity, the same butterflies as he got with Aizawa, but.. for now, it was enough.

"No way, I'd suck." Niko mumbled with a quick shake of his head, looking up in almost alarm, "Don't ask me to sing. I do not have that type of skill."

"I think you'd do just fine," Sero chuckled, "You have good voice for.. that type of shit. You should let me hear." Niko only tipped his head to the side, eyebrows knitting together. Am I missing something? He stared at Sero. He didn't have a very melodic voice, so.. Was he just trying to flirt?

"Niko." Sero's lips curved upwards, raising his eyebrows. His eyes dropped to Niko's lips, and then up again. 

Oh He means.. SINGING. Niko went scarlet again, lips forming a silent 'o' in surprise, mind going completely blank- unusual for his typical smooth flirting. Sero leaned back a little, laughing nervously, "Sorry, was that too much? I might've misread the situation."

Niko blinked, "No, nonono, this is- um, this is good," He was so warm he felt like he had a fever, stumbling over his words, "You- ah, you didn't misread anything." He leaned closer this time, "Maybe I could let you hear a few things. You'll have to get it out of me first, though."

Sero grinned. 

That was all it took, and then Niko was underneath Sero, his lips moving against Sero's heat pooling in his gut like hot lava, breath shaky. "Fuck," He breathed into the kiss, almost a moan. Sero's hands slipped below his shirt, sending goosebumps all over his body. He kissed well, his tongue slipping past Niko's lips, a faint taste of cigarettes singing on his tongue. 

They were both panting, Niko wrapping his arms around Sero and pulling him lower, blood rushing south as Sero's waist slid against his, drawing a breathy, almost pathetic whine from Niko.

"You sound so good," Sero breathed into his ear, lips sliding down to his neck. His teeth were sharp, biting and sucking the skin hard. Painfully hard, in that addictive way. Niko's back arched, fingernails digging into Sero's shirt.

"G-god-" He moaned, eyes sliding shut as his head tilted back, whining, "Harder, pl-please," His plead was answered immediately, Sero's teeth sinking harder into the skin, drawing another shaky, desperate moan from him. Mmngh, he's good. 

"All you had to do was ask, Flare," Sero murmured against his neck, hand gripping Niko's waist tightly, his lip sucking deep red marks into the skin, "Is it okay if I..?" His hand teased Niko's waistband, tentative and waiting. 

"Please." Niko begged, hands shaking as he unbuckled his pants quickly, unzipping them before he dragged Sero into another hungry kiss, his teeth grazing the other mans lips, breathing hard. 

"So hot, Niko," Sero was grinning into the kiss, "You been waiting for this?" His hand palmed Niko's erection, and he all but lost his ability to breathe, let alone respond. 

He tripped over his own breath, and Sero chuckled in amusement, slipping below his boxers to touch him properly. The friction was overwhelming, making his body tremble. To say it'd been awhile since he'd had anything sexual with anyone, or even jerked off, would be an understatement. 

"I could use my tongue, if you'd like that," Sero offered, pulling back from the kiss as he searched Niko's gaze. 

Niko blinked, "Oh, I'm not a-" "You don't need to be a top." Sero shushed him with a single finger, teasing, "I'll still make you sing later."

"Go ahead, then," Niko breathed, slipping his pants lower. Sero shimmied lower, using one hand to stroke him, slowly at first. "Fuck, Sero," He moaned, one hand going to Sero's head, pleasure flooding through his body. 

But fuck, when his tongue got to work? Niko could barely breathe, soft whimpers slipping past his lips before he could so much as think about stopping them, his hand tight in Sero's hair. He'd never been sucked off before but he could barely think, barely speak.

Sero took him all down his throat, bobbing his head up and down with no trouble at all, just about sending Niko into a state of incoherent bliss. 

"Ke- fuck, pleas-please keep going," Niko whimpered, bliss making his vision blurry, "s-so close-" his breath hitched, and his eye squeezed shut, an explosion of pure ecstasy seized him, cumming hard, right into Sero's mouth. Vaguely, he heard the man choke ever so slightly, but he didn't move off until Niko had finished completely, his body trembling, sweat soaking into his clothes. 

He looked down, propping himself up on one arm, eyes half lidded as he struggled to catch his breath. "H-holy fuck." He stuttered. Sero was smiling at him, wiping cum from his lips as he came back up to kiss Niko again.

Niko delved into it without hesitation, tasting the salty liquid from Sero's own tongue.  He couldn't control the whiny breathing, the orgasm making him sloppy and desperate. "Slow down, Flare," Sero hummed, "You're insatiable."

Niko pulled back, meeting his gaze, "S-sorry," He looked away, flustered, "I can't help it."

"You want me to grab condoms?" Sero's lips curled into a devilish smile.

God yes- Niko opened his mouth to speak, but instantly, he was all but assaulted with flashes of Aizawa. His taste, his eyes, the soft words he murmured to Niko, the feeling. Niko choked on his words, mouth snapping shut as he stared at Sero. 

"Woah, relax, we don't have to do anything you don't want to." Sero assured him warmly, "You have nothing to be anxious about." 

Niko shook his head, "No, it's not that-- I do, really want it," He blushed crimson, "But.. It's just, fuck, it's complicated."

Sero's eyes narrowed and he sat back. "You don't have to explain anything," Sero started, voice still that same warm tone, but he felt like he had to tell Sero. It wasn't fair to the other male, not after everything just now. Niko pulled his pants up, zipping them and sitting up.

"No, that's alright, I don't mind. I owe you an explanation." Niko laughed nervously, looking away.

"Niko." Sero's voice was serious, drawing his attention back, "I'm not into you like that. I know you're caught up on someone, I know that look, and I'm not looking for anything serious either."

Niko was hit with instant relief, basically melting, "Oh thank fuck." He breathed, leaning backwards and almost giggling in relief.

Sero snorted, "C'mon, do I look like the type to fuck on a first date?"

Niko sat back up, his eyebrows raising. Sero raised his hands, laughing, "Okay, okay jeez. But seriously, if I wanted to date you, I wouldn't just take you to my house to hook-up. Not very classy."

Niko grinned, "Whatever you say." He paused, and then added apologetically, "Sorry for killing the mood."

Sero waved him off with a psshh noise, "Dude, don't worry about it. Do you wanna smoke and just chill for a bit?"

"Sounds good." They exchanged smiles, and Niko put on a hoodie (borrowed from Sero), and slid his shoes on, following him outside a few minutes later. They sat on the steps, Sero lighting them both cigarettes. 

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Sero asked after a few minutes of silence, "The, as you said, 'complicated'?"

Niko hesitated, but, he trusted Sero. It might be good to get an outside perspective. He took a drag of the cigarette, and began. "For the record, I got held back a year. I'm 20- going on 21 this year, but my birthday is in December, so it's awhile off."

Sero looked mildly concerned by this pre-information, but let Niko continue. "I.. Well, to put it bluntly, have always been attracted to someone there. I've been around him for, what, five years- no, this will be the sixth, and I've almost always been into him, but I didn't pursue anything until recently." Niko explained slowly, trying to avoid details for Aizawa's own privacy, which was a value that he was well aware the man liked. 

"He's just.. not ready for anything serious, I guess." Niko sighed, "We were together for a couple months, and I really thought that he did love me, but he's so iffy with feelings like that. We didn't end on a good note and I guess I've been letting the pent up anger get to me." He inhaled the smoke slowly, blowing it out and looking at Sero. 

"The guy from the other day." Sero shook his head in what looked like disbelief, "How old is he?"

"Twenty ni-, oh, actually, he's thirty now." Niko admitted, growing hot with embarrassment.

Sero looked at him skeptically, "Ten years older? And he's not... You know."

Niko blinked, and then the realization of what Sero was asking hit him, "Oh, my god, no!" Niko shook his head rapidly, "He's not a fucking weirdo like that. I'm not a child, and he didn't even reciprocate until I was turning twenty. If anything I was pushing hard for... Months, basically."

"Thank god." Sero chuckled, "Yeah, seems complicated." 

They fell into a comfortable silence, both smoking their respective cigs. "Do you wanna stay the night?" Sero offered, looking at him after a few minutes. 

Niko shrugged, "If you don't mind?"

Sero smiled, "No problem, Flare." His eyes dropped, "Um.. You might want to cover up, by the way. I went a little crazy on your neck. Do you have school tomorrow?"

Niko snorted, "Yeah, but I don't care about the hickies, don't worry."

Sero looked a little relieved, "Awesome. Do you want a ride in the morning? I'm working an hour later so I need to be up anyway."

"Yeah, that'd be awesome. Thank you, Sero." Niko found his gaze, "I'm glad to have met you."

They talked for another hour or so, smoking a bit  more before they went to bed. 

Chapter Text

When him and Atsuo met up for class, it was the next Monday. Atsuo had been gone on Friday for some sort of family trip that Niko hadn't inquired about, so he hadn't talked about what happened between him and Sero, but when Atsuo saw him during on Monday, during oil painting, he immediately had questions.

Sitting down beside him, Atsuo stared at the hickies pointedly before his eyes darted to the dark haired professor in the corner of the room, "So... Did you two make up?"

Niko was immediately taken aback, "What? Fuck no, Atsuo." Even though it'd been a few days since Sero and him had hooked up, the hickies were dark. Sero was a biter, and the hickies were a deep purple, scarlet blooming on his neck. If peered at closely, there were slight teeth marks. Niko hadn't bothered trying to hide them past Friday, because he had no concealer or foundation. 

Atsuo's eyes widened, a devious smile creeping up his lips, "Let me guess. Your flirty little coworker?"

Niko went warm, eyes averting as he hid a smile with his sleeve, "Maaaybe... Look, but it's not serious. We're just friends with benefits." He could tell Atsuo was skeptical, clearly noticing his flustered state, but Niko added defensively, "It's like you said. I'm not nearly over him, and I told Sero that. He's not looking for anything serious either."

Atsuo laughed, poking his arm, "You don't need to get defensive. I think it's a good choice, especially with all the stress lately. Sero seems respectful and fun- and clean- so I trust you. Just be safe and remember you can always back out if it's too much."

Niko nodded, "I know. He's great, and like you said, very respectful. I mean, fuck," Niko laughed, "He could tell I was feeling worried about.. ya know, fucking, without me even saying anything."

Atsuo beamed, his face alight with warmth and clear relief, "That's awesome Niko. I'm glad you found someone like that. You two-" He cut himself, his eyes snapping shut, jaw closing abruptly. Niko frowned at him, glancing backwards to find Aizawa looking down at him, his eyes running over Niko's figure. 

His eyes lingered on the hickies, the muscle in his jaw ticking, "Class is starting. Shut your mouths." The older man turned around rather sharply, tension in every line of his figure, his clothes holding the same well-kept but cold aura. Niko snorted, and rolled his eyes, but he remained silent.

Him and Atsuo exchanged glances, but neither of them said anything. Aizawa began to talk, mainly about his final and what it'll be graded on, as well as some other minor assignments and the week plan. Time and time again, Niko found Aizawa looking at him, staring at him, with that same intense stare. Each time, the void that claimed his dark eyes was stormy, simmering with irritation. It didn't take a genius to see that he was studying the student intensely. Occasionally, he would catch Aizawa's jaw tighten, his hands wrap ever so slightly tighter around the paper he was holding. 

He's jealous. Niko's heart-rate instantly accelerated, fiery warmth, that of an inferno, blazing in his cheeks despite himself. Fuck off. He glared right back at Aizawa, passing off the carmine dust on his face as anger-fueled redness. 

Aizawa went on to lecture for another fifteen minutes before he allowed students to get to work on the sketches for the painted pieces. The only guide that he'd given them was to make it personal, about something that might've happened in their life, whether that was good or bad.

And, oh boy, Niko knew exactly how to hit Aizawa where it hurt. He barely needed to brainstorm before he started sketching in his journal. The painting would be of a marionette, tangled and collapsing with blood dripping from the strings, with someone holding the cross bar with an almost clinical expression - no emotional investment.

He planned the color palette with less trouble. A charcoal-y black for the shadows and background tones, violet and red for bruises and the blood, as well as a more orange-brown red for dried blood and stains. The skin would be a pale, purple-ish white to portray the drained blood and corpse-like figure. Smaller details - the control bar and string clips would be rusty gold, and steel blue for the background accents and highlights on the strings.

The sketching and planning took up the entire rest of class, and Niko was so focused he barely noticed the set of eyes frequenting him from across the room.

After class, he did some more planning and concept sketches before going to work. He wasn't working with Sero today, but a sweet woman around his age named Momo. She and Niko got along fairly well, so the shift went by well and he ended up getting home before 23:00. 

When he did get home, it was icy outside. There was frost coating the floor, making it slippery to walk in his riding boots. Making his way up to the door, he yawned, pushing it open and taking his boots off to put them on the shoe rack. He hung his riding jacket on the coat hanger and plopped down on the couch to defrost from the cold ride home, pulling out his phone. The sound of a door opening drew his attention upwards, surprised. Hizashi was usually fast asleep by this time, but lo and behold, he came walking down the stairs, wearing pajamas. 

"Hi!" Niko smiled warmly at the blond man, "I'm surprised you're still up."

Hizashi chuckled, an easy smile adorning his features. "Me too, but I wanted to catch you before you went to bed. There was something I wanted to ask you about," He explained. Niko patted the couch beside him, curiosity simmering in his stomach. He wasn't worried- not like he was with his mother, instead just curious and open to what Hizashi would ask. 

Hizashi sat down next to him, green eyes flicking to his neck briefly before he started, "So, obviously you don't have to tell me, but if you ever... you know, wanna bring someone over, I'd love to meet them." 

"Oh-" Niko went red, laughing nervously as he shook his head, "No, it's not like that. We're just friends, we're both not looking for anything serious." It was stupid to not assume that Hizashi would ask about it, considering they lived together, but the offer still caught Niko completely off guard. 

"I understand! I'm not trying to rush you or anything, I'm just glad you're having fun. God knows I did with Oboro." Hizashi's eyes glimmered, amused by the clear embarrassment, "Can I ask who he is?"

Niko nodded, glancing aside and easing the tension in his shoulders before he spoke, "His name is Sero, he's a little bit older than me. Maybe a couple years, but we work together and he's super chill and respectful. I think you guys would get along, actually. He has a great sense of humour." Hizashi smiled, listening attentively as Niko added, "I value our friendship a lot, but I'm not into him like that and I clarified that before things got too serious, y'know? He feels the same way though, so we're cool."

Leaning over with a grin, Hizashi ruffled his hair, "That's great, Niko. I'm glad your new job is going well and he's a nice guy. If you ever do  want to have him over, though, I don't mind. You can bring Atsuo and such too, you know I love to know your friends."

"Thank you, 'Zashi, I appreciate it. You're amazing, really." His words were softer than he'd meant to say them, but the tone wasn't necessarily wrong. Niko appreciated Hizashi more than the other man could even fathom, and no words were enough to prove that. I mean, letting me move in with him? Helping me after the crash? There's no way I deserve this guy. 

"Aw, don't mention it," Hizashi waved him off with false-modesty, clearly fighting off a grin, "Anyway- I also wanted to tell you that Oboro is coming back for a bit. He'll be here in a few weeks, or so, but he'll probably only be here for a week or so."

Niko blinked, staring at Hizashi's excited beam for a few moments before his own crept up, recovering from his surprise. "Awesome! I finally get to actually meet him," He paused, lacing his fingers together and looking away, "Do you think he'll like me?"

They'd met over facetime a couple times, but nothing extended. His stomach at the thought of someone important to Hizashi not liking him, though... Niko wasn't exactly 'normal', per se. It wasn't that he was weird, but he was awkward, and anti-social. Some people didn't like talking to people like that.

"He's going to love you, Niko. Don't worry about it, he's very easygoing." Hizashi assured him, dismissing his worry without batting an eye, "You're both very easy to get along with and he's super sweet." 

Niko could tell just from the look in Hizashi's eyes how much he cared for the other man, and he had to stifle his own amused smile. It was sweet to see how much he cared even though they were so long distance, and he was more than happy to see that Hizashi had that with someone. 

"Do you think he'll ever stay permanently?" Niko implored, meeting Hizashi's emerald gaze. 

Hizashi was silent for a few seconds before he responded. Niko could see him thinking, his eyes flicking away thoughtfully before he met Niko's gaze again, nodding, "I think so. He makes a good amount of money and he's working towards getting a permanent job here. It should only be a few more years- maybe two or three max- before he stays for good."

Niko nodded, "Will you guys move in together here, or move out entirely?" He'd grown fond of the this house, and obviously he'd be moving out eventually, but he'd love to still be able to visit Hizashi and eventually Oboro here. 

Hizashi hummed, "Well, if he wants to stay here, I'm more than happy to do that. We have the space here for both of us as well as you and, who knows, maybe a dog or two." He got this distant, fond look in his eyes as he was talking, "But yeah, I reckon I'll stay here. We'll have to talk about it once he really does stay here, though."

"A dog?" Niko echoed, his lips curling upwards, "I didn't know you're a dog person. What type of dogs do you want??" He pulled his feet up onto the couch, crossing his legs and adjusting to better face Hizashi, leaning back against the cushy arm rest. 

Hizashi seemed pleased to continue talking, also adjusting slightly. "I'd love a great dane, but I don't want to buy from a breeder. We'll probably look at some shelter dogs - not too young, but young enough to be trained 'n such. Ideally, we could get a pair that already know each other, but it's all up in the air until then."

"Oboro also loves dogs, because he's more active than I am, so maybe we'd get a more laid-back dog and one that he could take on walks frequently." Hizashi mused to himself, "I think I'd like a dog I could take to my art shows that would be easygoing and social, but I'm not too picky."

Niko nodded agreeably, "I think that'd be great for you two. I'm not much a dog person but I adore cats. When I eventually move out, I'd love to have a couple cats." He paused, thinking to himself before adding thoughtfully, "An aquarium, maybe. Sea life has always been beautiful to me, but it depends on how much I want to put into cleaning everything 'n stuff. Oh- Actually, alternatively, I would love a rat that I could take places with me. They're really smart, and they can even learn tricks and stuff," Niko was rambling a little, but he couldn't help it, "I don't exactly know what I want to go into when I'm older, but it would be cool to have a little companion to follow me around."

"I guess a cat could do that too, though." He considered, "So maybe just cats, then."

Hizashi laughed a bit, "Yeah, rats are cute. I think Oboro would love to have an aquarium, being a marine biologist and all. I could definitely see you with a couple cats in the future."

 Niko nodded, "I've wanted to have a black and white cat for my whole life. I've always had a list of pet names, but my favorites are definitely ... Hm," He pulled out his phone, skimming over the list before decisively adding, "Tzatziki is cute, or Squid or Molecule. I have one on here from a childhood show I used to watch- Pippinpaddleopsicopolis."

Hizashi's eyebrows shot up, and they both dissolved into light laughter, managing to ask through laughter,  "Wh-what is that from??" 

Niko cleared his throat, fighting away the giggles, "It's from an old show I love. It's called Avatar- Not the blue guys, the Airbender one. 'N I'd call the cat Pin or Pip for short."

They continued to talk for awhile, before Hizashi ended up going to bed and Niko made himself some dinner, a bowl of ramen with some green onions and such in it. He ate downstairs, washing his dish and then heading upstairs to finally change. 

It felt amazing to finally change out of his motorcycle gear, setting his helmet on the floor beside his extra shoes, and putting the rest of his stuff away before throwing on some black sweatpants and the dark red hoodie he'd borrowed from Sero. It was very comfortable. 

He didn't go to bed immediately, instead finally opening up the messages from Sero. 

sero :3: Btw, Niko, you can always hmu for anything, no strings attached ;)
sero :3: You working tmrw?
me: you know it >3<
me: n ill definitely take you up on that offer ;3
sero :3: Can't wait, Flare

After that, he also responded to Atsuo, who'd asked what his plans were on Wednesday. 

me: not much, why?? do u wanna do smth? :3
atsuo >P<: yesss i would love that
atsuo >P<: i was thinking that we could go to the mall??
me: YEESS IM SO DOWN ATSU
me: wednesday after class??
atsuo >P<: mhmhmhm thats perfect ^_^

With that, he turned to studying for his Earth Sciences final. It was the one he was most worried for, because of how hard it was. Japanese, he was good at- mostly, but science wasn't his strong suit, nor was math, which was the entire reason he got held back in fourth year. He'd put too much into trying to prevent needing anymore math classes, and had to retake the year anyway because he had to make up the lost credits for Japanese and History.

By the time he got to bed, it was past 01:00. 

Chapter Text

"You want to bring your fuck-buddy?"

Niko scowled at Atsuo, playfully shoving him as he protested in a whiny tone, "C'mon, he's my friend too! I promise you'll love him, he's super social and has a great sense of humour."

Atsuo raised his eyebrows skeptically, eyeing Niko, "I'm not worried about getting along with him, I'm worried about you two ditching me to screw in a bathroom." His serious expression melted away, bursting into laughter as Niko's jaw all but fell open in surprise, "I'm just messing with you Nik, of course you can bring Sero. I'm looking forward to meeting him, he seems great."

Relief made Niko weak, and he fought off a crimson blush, muttering, "You're so evil."

Atsuo only gave him a devious smile, instead changing the subject, "Who's driving? Not you, obviously, but are we all riding together in my car?"

"I think Sero can drive us, if that's cool with you. He already worked the morning shift today so he should be free." Niko suggested, pulling up his text messages to shoot an invite to Sero. Atsuo gave a nod of agreement, glancing aside. Niko followed his gaze to the classroom he was looking at, "We have a few minutes, don't worry."

"Niko I think Aizawa will skin me alive if I'm late." Atsuo deadpanned, "He's more lenient to you but he still hates the rest of us."

Niko rolled his eyes, "C'mon, he treats me the same as the rest of you. And he will not, but we can go in if you want. If anything, he'll be more annoyed that you're early."

Atsuo squinted at him, "He definitely does treat you differently, but whatever you say, mister. Let's go in." Atsuo stood up first, leading the way to the classroom while Niko trailed along more reluctantly. 

Just before the door, Atsuo paused, "Actually, can you save my seat? I need to piss." Niko sighed, nodding. Of course I have to go in alone. Did he plan this? Atsuo beamed at him and trotted off in the direction of the bathrooms, leaving his backpack with Niko, who begrudgingly grabbed it and half-shoved the door open. 

As he suspected, the room was completely empty aside from Aizawa sitting at his desk. The man didn't look up as Niko entered, only muttering a greeting, "Kasai."

"Shouta." Niko returned coldly, sitting down in his seat and setting Atsuo's bag in the chair beside him. That made Aizawa look up, his eyes narrowing. 

"Don't call me that."

"Or what?" Niko snapped back, "Gonna ditch me? Oh, wait, you already did that."

Aizawa glared at him, "Don't start. It's clear you already moved on." He flashed a look at his neck, and Niko was seized by a burning anger, resentment curdling the words in his mouth.

"You don't get to be jealous, Aizawa," Niko flung right back, voice dripping with venom, "You lost your chance." Tension crackled in the air like it was about to storm, neither speaking. Aizawa gave him a long, measured stare before he looked back at what he was doing, leaving them in deadly silence. 

Niko sat in his seat, pulling out his sketch-book for the class and skimming over the designs he'd done two days ago. Only a few minutes later, Atsuo came back with a flurry of other students who must've taken that as their invitation, everyone filing into the classroom, low chatter filling the room. Aizawa stood up as people walked in, brushing the same strand that always fell out of place, out of his face with a hand and casting a fleeting glance in Niko's direction, which Niko paid no mind to. 

"Today, you can start working on your art pieces. I'd suggest finishing your description and message first, which you should've started yesterday, that way you can get it out of the way and give it to me to critique. The written section is due today in class, and I expect you all to have the majority of your paintings complete or adding the finishing touches by next Tuesday. They will be due on Wednesday. If you cannot finish it by that time, you will fail this class." Aizawa spoke curtly, dry and monotonous. "You'll all be presenting them in a gallery-type walk in this classroom."

Niko glanced at him briefly, but he wasn't worried about finishing it on time, since he could work it at home now. He was sketching in his journal again, and tuned out of the conversation. If he missed anything important, he'd learn about it in the rubric. 

He put on his headphones, shuffling one of his playlists and continuing to sketch. He had one ear out, just in case anyone said anything, but for the most part, he was in his own world. Out of all honestly, he didn't really care what Aizawa had to say.  

Unfortunately for him, Aizawa wasn't giving him any slack. 

"Kasai." Aizawa's hand whisked his journal away, not looking but shutting it, "Is being reasonable above you, or can I continue? Would you rather be marked down for being disrespectful?" His voice cut through the silent air like a hot knife. 

Niko met his gaze evenly, voice dripping with a very obviously exaggerated sweetness, "I'm so sorry, please keep going. I'd love to hear what you have to say, Sensei."  Beside him, he heard Atsuo snort, muffled by what Niko assumed was his hand.

"Is something funny, Kurosaki?" Aizawa snapped, his glacial gaze turning to Niko, "Kasai. Do you want me to escort you to the principals, or can you be decent?"

"I'll save you the effort," Niko snapped back. He was too sleep-deprived and frankly fed up to care anymore, grabbing his journal from Aizawa's hands and swinging his backpack over his shoulder. He didn't wait to hear Aizawa's response, leaving without another word and beelining right out of the commons. Oil Painting was his last class and he was so angry he didn't even care anymore. Irrational? Yes, but for the moment, it was too much to handle. 

He threw on his helmet, gloves and jacket, twisting the key in his motorcycle. It turned on smoothly, and he pulled out of the parking lot, driving past the school and revving it loudly as if saying a loud fuck you, to Aizawa. 

Niko drove right to Sero's house, parking and locking the bike before he ran up the stairs, pulling off his helmet and shaking out his hair before ringing the doorbell. 

A few seconds later, Sero opened the door, wearing just a white tank-top and black jeans. His hair was wet and he smelled like soap. "Niko?" He blinked in surprise, "Aren't you supposed to be in class right now?"

Niko avoided his question, "Remember when you said no strings attached? That offer still available?"

Sero beckoned him inside, and Niko took off his shoes, taking off his jacket and such, setting all his things on the couch. Sero was already talking right behind him, "Are you sure? I mean, with all the stuff with you and that guy-" Niko turned around abruptly, kissing Sero hard. 

"Shut up and kiss me," Niko breathed, his eyes slitting open. Sero was crimson, but he had a grin on his face, drawing Niko into a deep kiss, flipping them and pushing Niko up against the wall. His teeth were rough, bruising Niko's lips, but it was just what he needed right now, wrapping his legs around Sero's waist, fingers sunk into his shoulders with a desperate, hungry lust. 

"Whatever you want, Flare," Sero purred, "You taste amazing." 

Niko breathed a soft moan as Sero's hand slid down to his ass, his tongue slick with their saliva combined, his pants already tented. Sero all but tossed him down on the couch, climbing on top of him and suctioning his lips to Niko's neck, "Is this-" "Yes, g-god-" Niko cut him off, one hand tight in his hair, the other gripping his shoulder.

Sero sucked on his neck hard, biting the skin until it was raw, no doubt leaving bruises on the soft, barely healed skin from their last time. Niko moaned shakily, his hips rutting upwards in desperation, body consumed by the uncontrollable heat of lust, head tilting back from the overwhelming pain and pleasure.

"Slow down, gorgeous," Sero chuckled breathily, "I need to grab the condoms." He started pulling back, and Niko nodded desperately, confirming that was what he wanted. Sero took two seconds to come back with a condom and lube, returning to his original position between Niko's legs, "Can I?" He touched Niko's waistband. 

"Please." Niko grinned, face bright red with blush, lifting his hips to help Sero pull his pants off, smooth, soft skin coming to view. Sero unbuckled his own pants, and Niko sat up, pulling his shirt off. He took the condom from Sero's hands, glancing up at him through big, dark eyes, and Sero nodded. 

He slid the condom over the tip of his dick, rolling it down the hot length. He was veinier, and slightly smaller than Aizawa was, but the sight alone made him shaky with excitement, laying on his back again. Sero leaned down, kissing him  as he slid two lube-slick fingers against his hole, slowly pressing them inside. Niko moaned into the kiss, adjusting his hips to give Sero better access. The black haired man took it in stride, slipping his fingers deeper into Niko, curling them and pulling them back out slowly, stretching him for what was to come. 

Niko lost himself in the sensation, breathy whimpers filling the air, his nails digging into Sero's skin. "You like that, Niko?" Sero teased into his ear, voice soft and slick with lust, thrusting his fingers more harshly inside, a high whine escaping Niko's lips, back arching. 

"S-soo good," He stuttered, words slurred and weak. The wet noises were audible, but Niko could barely focus on anything but the pleasure of having someone aside from himself inside of him.  

"Hold still." He ordered, pulling his fingers out and jerking Niko's body upwards, lining himself up. Niko nodded fuzzily, wrapping his legs around Sero to take some of the pressure off. Sero pressed himself slowly inside of Niko, leaning down to press rough kisses to his chest, biting and teasing the sensitive skin between his teeth. Niko was shaking, body trembling from all the sensation, pre-cum dripping from the tip of his own dick down onto his stomach. 

Sero was rough and Niko loved it. Instantly, once he was adjusted, Sero flipped him onto his stomach, back arched, pressing his hips flush against Niko's ass. Niko moaned, muffled by the couch cushions, gripping the arm rest as Sero fucked into him hard, bursts of ecstasy shooting through Niko. 

"go-mmngh, fu-fuck, please,nghg~" Niko moaned, words incoherent and slurring together in the haze of lust and pleasure, sweat prickling all over his body.

"You're so tight," Sero breathed, leaning down with his chest flush against Niko, "Taking me so good, slut," His words were deceptively soft, almost degrading.

Niko could only whine in response, drinking all the words and pleasure, reduced to a mess beneath the other man. He was reaching his breaking point fast, and with the way Sero was talking to him, he knew he wouldn't last long. 

"Fuck, you feel amazing," Sero moaned as he fucked Niko to near-tears, his thrusts hard enough to make a stinging, addictive pain break out along his ass, "You want me to pull out when- fuck- when I c-cum?" He asked through grunts and sultry moans.

"In," Niko breathed, "P-please, in," His words were pleading and desperate, fingernails digging into the fabric tight enough to hurt, tightening around Sero. The other man groaned in response, fingers digging into Niko's waist so hard that it hurt.

It was amazing. Sero's breath was hot on his shoulder, all but ramming Niko into the couch over and over again. He was trapped between Sero and the cushions and fuck if that wasn't good, Niko didn't know what was. 

"Mmnhh- Sero-" Niko's breath hitched in his throat, his eyes squeezing shut. His body felt like it was on fire, pleasure so intense it felt like explosions burning under his skin and building frantically in his gut, "Pl-please, harder,"

Niko rocked backwards into Sero's hips, a near-pathetic whimper tearing from his lips as Sero's cock drove even further into him, "Fuck- yeah, just- nngh- just like that-"

"Don't- don't do that, I'm gonna cum-" Sero hissed through clenched teeth, but Niko was so close he could barely hear, trembling and moaning below Sero. 

The black haired man came first, instantly sending Niko over the edge as he too finished, crumbling under his own weight, eyes squeezed shut in bliss. Sero rested above him, heat radiating off of the panting man, skin hot and flush against Niko. Niko could feel both of them twitching, but he couldn't move much, breathing hard into the cushions. 

Sero spoke first, "Fuck, you're good." He laughed through his heavy breathing, "You okay down there, Flare?"

Niko nodded breathlessly, "S-so are you." He managed to say, feeling Sero pull out, squeezing his ass once before he pulled the condom off and tossed it. "We should shower." Niko murmured, sitting up and trying to shake out the twitchy remnants of his orgasm. 

Sero and him showered separately, Sero first, and then him. By the time he got out of the shower, Sero had already cleaned up everything and was sitting on the couch, smoking. He looked up as Niko entered, wordlessly offering him the cigarette, which Niko took, sitting beside him.

"I should tell you it's almost time to go to the mall," Sero spoke up, and Niko blinked, exhaling smoke. He'd almost completely forgotten about that.

"Oh, shit. Right-" Niko glanced at the time, "We should leave soon. Can you drive us?" He asked, looking at the older male, who nodded, an easy smile on his lips. 

"No problem. You should let Atsuo know we're leaving to pick him up soon." Sero explained, standing throwing on a shirt that was on the coffee table.

Niko nodded, standing up and putting on his own shirt, but leaving his riding stuff at the house, only putting on his boots. He gave Atsuo a quick text, ignoring his prior messages asking if Niko was okay, and followed Sero down to his car, sitting down in the passenger.

Sero put on music, and Niko hummed along contentedly, his feet crossed on the seat comfortably. "We should do that more often." Niko commented idly, and Sero nodded. 

"Definitely. You're.. A different breed." Sero remarked with a grin, voice lowering slightly, "So needy."

Niko blushed, scowling, "I can't help it... You're so rough." Sero blinked, and Niko added hastily, "I like it."

His expression relaxed, and he added, "And you're such a freak." After a moment of silence, he prompted, "Does Atsuo know what's going on between us?"

"The friends with benefits thing?" Niko glanced at him, "Duh, he's my best friend. He likes you, he thinks you're nice." Niko chuckled, "Why, are you nervous?"

Sero gave him a disbelieving look, snorting, "To meet someone? No way, I just wanted to know what he did and didn't know. I'm social, you don't have to worry about me."

Atsuo was waiting by the curb when they arrived, talking to Sei. Upon spotting Niko and Sero, he gave Sei a quick kiss and jogged over, hopping in the back seat. Immediately he introduced himself, "Hey Niko. And Sero, it's good to meet you in person." He smiled warmly at Sero, who returned it with an amicable smile of his own. 

"Same goes to you."

"Dude, Niko," Atsuo immediately changed the subject, "Ai- Er," He looked at Sero. 

Niko's lips curled upwards, "He knows everything but his name."

"Okay, well, he was pissed after you left. I thought he was gonna chase after you but he just glared at the door and muttered something probably very mean under his breath. Did you get any notices from the principal or anything?" Atsuo asked, out of breath from his rambling, green eyes wide. 

Sero piped up, eyebrows raising, "You ditched? Wow, that's a surprise coming from you, Flare."

Niko shot Sero an unamused look, and turned to Atsuo, "No, are you kidding? I doubt he even genuinely considered taking me there. I'm surprised he didn't text me."

"Oh, umm.. He told me to tell you that you need to stay in during lunch tomorrow to make up for the last time," Atsuo winced at the furious expression that broke out on Niko's face, adding reasonably, "I mean, you did ditch his class."

Niko sighed, calming himself down and turning to face the front, "Yeah, I was just fed up. And sleep deprived. I'll stay in tomorrow, but I doubt it'll be anything I didn't already know." Clearing his throat, he switched the subject, "Are you excited for the mall?"

Atsuo nodded, easing at the subject change, "Duhh, always." He looked at Sero, "So, Sero, how long have you worked at Midnight Brew?"

Sero hummed, musing, "Shit, I think two or three years now? Maybe a little longer, I can't exactly remember."

Niko's vision snapped to him, blinking. He had no idea that he'd been working there that long, "Is that why they asked you to train me?"

Sero nodded, "Probably. I also trained Momo. I think me, Hado and Amajiki have been there the longest, but I think Momo's been here for at least six months now. You're the newbie."

Niko blew a raspberry, "Yeah, that checks out. Sosaki?"

"Longer than the rest of us. She knows her way the fuck around, so I assume the owners hired her awhile ago." Sero shrugged, "I don't know. She's pretty cool, though."

Niko nodded, and Sero cast a glance in Atsuo's direction before he looked back at the road, "Do you have a job?"

Atsuo nodded, "Yeah, I work at at a grocery store. I mainly do stocking but sometimes I do register if there's nobody else."

Sero hissed, "Damn, that must be tough. Customers can be annoying at grocery stores."

Atsuo only shrugged, and Niko added, "It's a smaller grocery store. It's family owned, right?" He glanced at Atsuo, who gave a noise of confirmation.

The mall ended up going well. Niko got a few new tops and a sort of leather-harness thingy that fit him perfectly, but they mainly just walked around and chatted. The trio got dinner at a food place inside, and then Sero drove them both back to the school and Niko drove himself home. 

Once home, he just did some more studying, showered and went straight to bed early so he could catch up on missed sleep.

Chapter Text

Maybe Niko overestimated his free-time. 

While it was true he'd finished the majority of his final for Aizawa's class over the weekend, it was now Monday night, and Aizawa had tightened the deadline to Tuesday, in class. Ready before class. In retrospect, that might've been my fault for pissing him off so much. 

Regardless who's fault it was, Niko was now carefully adding the finishing touches to the painting. He wasn't rushing. He knew in the morning, he would be exhausted, but he refused to rush this project, since it needed to be picture perfect. 

The clock was just past 02:38, and he was adding highlights to certain things. The marionette's control rod, the deep crimson blood. The lighting was dramatic, the scene deep and beautifully done - almost perfect. When it came to painting, especially with Aizawa, he needed it to be as close to perfect as he could get, no matter how long that took. Whether that be because he was pissed at Aizawa and needed to have perfect scores to prove something to him, or because he wanted to improve his own skill.. Well, it was uncertain. Maybe a little of both. 

Atsuo had finished his over the weekend, but Niko had been at Sero's house for one of the days, and he'd worked earlier today, so he barely had any time until he got home at 22:50. Four hours later, he was barely finishing up. 

Leaning back, Niko squinted at the painting. It did look amazing, and it might've been the best painting he'd ever done, but his mind gnawed at him, scouring the painting. Is anything off? Did I miss a highlight or something? 

Oh. He leaned forward again, adding a strand of hair falling from the puppeteers frame, the same one that Aizawa had resting in his face when his hair was pulled into a messy ponytail. Of course, the painting's man didn't look exactly like him, but the nose was similar, and the expression was one Niko knew well. His classmates wouldn't see it, but Aizawa would. 

That, he knew for sure. 

The next morning, he got to school earlier. He'd done his finals for Japanese on Monday, and he had Aizawa's today. Earth Sciences was the next day, and then finally a minor JSL demonstration on Friday.

He didn't do much in Japanese, aside from a minor project that Yagi had them working on, so when he was getting to Aizawa's class, he was more than confident in his work. There wasn't much 'presenting' going on, despite Aizawa's whole spiel about an oral exam. Mainly, they'd just be walking around and reading the written statements and looking at the paintings. Leaving critiques and compliments, you get the idea. 

Everything was already set up when Niko got inside.  The paintings were displayed on aisles with their written parts on the table in front of them, each holding what the painting entailed. Obviously, the perception of what it meant was unique to every viewer, so mainly it would be just a description and brief overview. 

Niko stuck to Atsuo's side as they waited for class to start, glancing at his own painting. The words Do you think he'll like it?  popped up by instinct, but he didn't stay them, flashing a glance in Aizawa's direction, though they didn't make eye-contact. He was talking to another student in a relatively calm manner, no signs of irritation on his face. Niko stared at them for a second, throat tightening, fingers curling into his palms until it stung. It would never happen, let alone with a student. Niko knew that, but it still made his lungs burn with jealousy. 

"Niko." Atsuo whispered. Niko's head basically snapped as he ripped his gaze from the pair, "Are you okay?"

"I'm okay. Mostly just ready to go to work and then get home," Niko nodded, shaking tension out of his hands and blinking a couple times to shake the feeling of jealousy, though it still simmered in his chest. Atsuo glanced in Aizawa's direction, and then back at him, raising his eyebrows. "Don't." Niko murmured, looking at him again despite himself, "I don't want to hear it today."

Atsuo shrugged, "Whatever you want. Anyway," His expression lightened, grinning, "I'm excited for you to see my painting. Well- I hope you like it." 

Niko rolled his eyes, playfully poking his shoulder as he reassured the calico-haired man, "It'll be great, Atsuo, don't worry."

They barely had time to talk more than that before Aizawa started. 

"You will each leave one comment on every painting in this room, excluding your own. They can be critiques or compliments. Today will be short because you will be let out early once the gallery walk finishes, and I will grade all of them myself." Aizawa explained in that same monotone voice he always used, gaze scorching through the students. Excitement murmured through the rest of them, though, at the prospect of leaving early. Aizawa paid no mind to it, "Each of you grab a stack of sticky notes and get to work. Add your initials on all of your notes, or you will get a zero in participation."

Niko stifled a roll of his eyes, grabbing his stack of green sticky-notes and starting. 

Fifth years were usually a lot better at painting after having gone through four years of art classes, but to his surprise, even the fourth years in his class were pretty good, so he admired them all respectively. It was part of the reason he was a bit ahead of his class, because he was technically supposed to be finishing his fifth year at UA, but getting held back just gave him extra classes for every subject except the ones he failed. Obviously, some were less smooth and Niko could see where they had trouble handling the oil paints, but overall, he was more than happy to leave compliments and minor critiques on them. The paintings weren't labeled, so he couldn't see who's was who's, but he knew Atsuo's immediately when he came to it. 

It was a painting of two people, the one on the right bearing a tattoo on his wrist, with painted nails. Obviously, it was Sei and him. The painting was done really well, warm colors lighting up the chests of them both, as if they were glowing in each-others presences, and the lighting silhouetted them well without making it too dark. Niko studied it for a few moments before leaving two sticky notes on the table, one complimenting the myriad of soft, warm colors, and the other the portrayal and clear view of what the painting meant. 

Every once and awhile, he'd catch Aizawa walking around the gallery, looking at all of them. He didn't make notes on them, as Niko assumed he would do that in private, but to his pleasure, when he stopped at Niko's painting, his eyes sought him out from across the room. There was no clear expression on his face, but the search alone made him rather pleased. Niko made eye-contact, tipping his head innocently to the side before he turned around to continue looking at where he was. The attention was exhilarating, the secret looks. It both ached and burned in Niko's chest, as if his skin was being seared from the inside out. 

Eventually, after an hour or so, Aizawa released them with a few minor notes about working on written statements more in the future.

Niko lingered with Atsuo as he packed up his things, soon leaving them to be the only two in the classroom. Aside from Aizawa, obviously. Atsuo was picking up his bag when Niko heard the familiar footsteps approaching. He could've just left, but his skin was buzzing, and the temptation to stay was too strong. He made eye-contact with his friend, giving a small nod, and then turned to face Aizawa, who was making his way over. Atsuo left without another word, shutting the door behind him. 

"Can I help you?" Niko asked, leaning back against the desk. Aizawa stopped a few paces away, his eyes almost searching Niko's before they narrowed, frost creeping over the depths. Great.

"Kasai, we talked about this. Not only your art, but your work in general has gotten increasingly erratic and hard to follow as of late. I've known you to be clean and well kept with what you do, but you've been slipping." Aizawa's tone wasn't exactly cold or mad, but it was guarded. The way they would've talked prior to everything. 

"Don't fucking start, Aizawa." Niko warned, but Aizawa ignored him, eyes burning into his neck for a split second before he continued. 

"And I would expect you, as a top-grade student, to present yourself with more dignity-"

"You don't get to be jealous, Shouta," The words came once again, and Niko snapped back, rising from the desk and stepping closer. His heart raced, skin flushing hot. He could smell that addicting scent from Aizawa's cologne, his clothes. "I'm my own fucking person and acting like a child, keeping me late and lecturing me because you want attention, isn't going to help either of us get over-" 

Niko cut himself off before he ended, but it was clear Aizawa could see what he was going to say. 

"Do I need to remind you that you're the one who started this, Niko? If anyone is acting childish, it's you," His voice softened. Just a bit, the slightest amount that nobody else would be able to see, his void-like eyes looking down with a softer emotion. Concern. "It's not hard to see that you're still seeking out attention despite you ending things. DOn't act like I'm the one drawing this out."

Niko's breath caught in his throat, tightening until he could barely breathe. Aizawa's eyes didn't leave his, consuming him raw. I can't- He was shaking, hands trembling at the proximity, the raw truth in Aizawa's words that he'd been avoiding. He whipped around, storming out of the classroom and all the way to the staff bathroom, where he sat, pulling his knees against his chest. 

He sat like that for awhile, torn between pure desperation, the aching sorrow of losing someone, and anger. 

I should've been more patient with him. The words felt like a stab in the gut, and he curled his hands into his hair, shaky. We could've been perfect. He could've been perfect. 

Niko was well aware he was the one clinging to Aizawa, even now, through the looks they exchanged, the attention that he was willing to give Niko despite how rudely he repeatedly treated Aizawa. Aizawa was only trying to quell the fire, while Niko was fueling it. 

Whether it was his own self-destruction or perhaps a touch of insanity, he left, speeding down the highway until he reached a familiar place. The mall he'd gone to with Atsuo and Sero not long ago. Perhaps he could distract himself with looking at things, or, fuck even watching a movie. 

He went to his usual store first, browsing through the clothes. The store catered towards alternative fashion and had loads of accessories, so he enjoyed just looking through them. Music playing in his ears, he skimmed the shirts first, and then belts and gloves and such. A particular pair of pants caught his eye, a pair of black cargo pants that looked to be his size. He picked them up, alongside a silver-ringed belt, and checked out, making sure to grab the receipt so he could return them if they didn't fit. 

The end of his semester was almost here, which meant Winter Formal was coming up, followed by (finally) fifth year. He wanted to look good - mainly for himself. Of course, he'd already planned most of his outfit, but his problem was a date. 

Atsuo, clearly, was going with Sei, and the effort of asking someone out just for show was too much for him. Too annoying. Niko could go alone, but if Aizawa was going to be there, he wanted to look his best and show up with someone equally as hot. 

Not that I'm doing this just to show off to him. 

He crossed the mall to a different store, art supplies. As he walked inside, aiming for the paint section, a familiar figure caught his eye. Wavy black hair, unmistakeable green eyes. Niko turned around abruptly, but the person was already walking towards him. Her face was cold, but not exactly fuming. 

He made it about two feet before she caught up to him, standing in his path. "Nikolaus." 

"Sora." He returned evenly, his eyes narrowed. She didn't look all that mad, in all honesty. She looked.. concerned?

"Where have you been? I've been worried sick." Sora's green eyes searched his own brown ones, and Niko felt a stab of surprise rush through him. He almost had to fight a scoff, concerned? What the fuck changed while I was gone?

"I moved in with a friend. Figured you'd want me out of your hair." He spoke curtly, keeping his voice calm and even. Sora's eyebrows knit together, frowning. 

"Do you know how exhausting it's been to worry about you?" There it is. "You just disappeared, the house is a fucking wreck, Nikolaus. Leaving without a word was incredibly selfish and I cannot believe you would put me in a situation like that. I would expect an adult to be mature enough to at least tell me you were planning on moving out, but apparently you're above that." Her words were almost tired enough to convince him, but Niko knew that angered look that inflamed her pale eyes by now. 

"I don't want to hear it, Sora. You're right, I am an adult. You can't tell me what to do or where to live. I did what was best for me and frankly I don't believe you when you say you're concerned." He countered, "You have shown me not even an ounce of love in the past 16 years and I'm sick of it."

"Love?" Her eyebrows raised, echoing again, "Love? What are you even talking about, Niko? I raised you, I fed you, I gave you clothes and walls and a roof. I gave you everything. And what do you do in return?" Sora scoffed, "Leave me without a word and tell me about how I don't love you?"

"Really?" Niko looked away, running a hand through his hair. He was at a loss for words, shaking his head, "Was it love when you gave me that scar on my back? When you hit me so hard I had a bruise and a gash on my cheek for weeks? Don't fucking give me that, Sora. We both know you were a fucking horrible mother."

Sora stared at him and shook her head, as if he was the insane one. Niko glared at her for a moment longer before he spat, "This is exactly why I left. Don't fucking come looking for me. I will file a restraining order against you."

He turned on his heel, walking away and pulling out his phone to call Atsuo. He picked up after two rings. 

"Hello?" His voice was groggy, a slight rasp to his words. 

"Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt your nap," Niko chuckled, casting a glance over his shoulder. She wasn't following. "Guess who I just ran into."

"Aizawa? Er... Sero?" 

"Fucking Sora." Niko shook his head, still trying to wrap his head around the whole interaction. 

"What?!" He was much more awake now, a shuffling noise as Niko assumed he sat up, "Are you okay? What happened?"

"Relax, nothing really happened. I went to the mall again, and ran into her on my way to the crafts store. She... I don't even know what her goal was. She was just bullshitting about how exhausting it's been without me and how selfish it was and shit." Niko scoffed, "And get this, she got mad at me because I told her how shitty she was and that this is exactly why I left. Apparently she can't come to terms with how fucked she was- is."

Atsuo was silent for a moment, the line buzzing slightly, "Well, fuck yeah for telling her off. Nik, seriously, you could file a restraining order against her if she tries to pull anything." His words were calmer now, though they still held a concerned edge. 

"I know. That's what I told her." Niko responded, spotting his motorcycle in the parking lot, "I think it scared her, 'cause she didn't say anything. She didn't even try to follow me, actually."

"Good riddance!" Atsuo declared through the phone, "I hope she leaves you alone from now on."

"Yeah, me too. Anyway, I just needed to tell someone. I'll talk to you later, Atsu. Bye." Niko hung up after another few seconds, tucking his phone away and folding up his pants and belt into his backpack before getting on his motorcycle, helmet slipping on nice and comfortable. 

He stopped by Sero's instead of going home, which he was pleased about, and they sat on the stairs again, talking over a smoke. 

"I'm just pissed at him." Niko's voice was soft as he spoke, staring off into the sky, where orange met blue, melting into pale lavender further up into the sky.

Sero was silent for a moment, smoke blowing past his lips. "Are you sure?"

Niko's head turned, staring at him incredulously, "What?"

Sero shrugged, "Well, when you talk about him, you don't seem angry. You're just.. hurting, I guess. I don't think you're actually mad at him, it just sounds like you miss him. Trust me, I've been there, but doing what you're doing now? That's only gonna make it worse. I think you'd be better off trying to take space and let him go."

Niko looked away again, drawing in the acrid smoke and exhaling it softly. The words stung, but the more he heard it, the less he could hide the truth from himself. "I..." The words died in his throat, and he shut his mouth, swallowing the tide of emotions that rose up in him. He cleared his throat, but his voice still came out shaky, "I can't."

"That's not true, Niko. You're, what, twenty, going on twenty one?" Sero tilted his chin so that Niko would look at him, "You have your whole life ahead of you. I know it doesn't seem like that right now, but you're a great guy, and a great friend. I promise you, you can find someone better for you."

Niko's breath hitched, choking back grief. Sero's gaze softened, adding, "And man, if you really want to pursue this, talk to him. I don't mean argue, I mean talk like adults. You're both grown and you can resolve it with a little trust and communication. Just remember it's not all on you. He needs to do his part too, and if he doesn't? Then he doesn't deserve you."

He released Niko's chin, and Niko looked away. "I'm not ready to talk to him. I don't want to be the only one still chasing this."

He could see Sero's shoulders shrug from the edge of his vision, "You're not. You really think he's really nitpicking that hard? He's obviously just trying to talk to you. And hey, I'm not even there, and I can tell from what you're telling me that he's jealous."

The words made Niko's lips twitch upwards, giving Sero a playful grin. A thought struck him hard, eyes narrowing as he stared at Sero. He was definitely an attractive guy, and him being touchy would only help....

"...Why are you looking at me like that?" Sero leaned away, his eyes wide, "Dude, you're freaking me out."

"Do you want to be my date to winter formal?" Niko asked, a devilish grin crossing his lips. Sero looked baffled, squinting at him as if he'd grown two heads. 

"What? Weren't we just talking about how you want someone else?" He rubbed his eyes, still squinting at him. 

"No, no not a real date. Just for show. Just to make him jealous." Niko explained, "And I need a date, anyway. Obviously we don't have to do anything you don't want to, but-"

"Oh, fuck yeah," Sero's face lit up, realization gleaming in his dark brown eyes, "That's fucking genius, Flare."

Aizawa's gonna be sooo pissed.

Chapter Text

"Fuck, Sero,"

Niko moaned, his breath hitching as he felt Sero slide into him slowly, tightening his grip of Sero's shoulders. The black haired male grinned down at him, "Oh, I'm barely getting started Niko,"

Niko gave him a flustered half-smile before his lips were parted into another soft whimper, eyes shutting as Sero's hips hit him a little harder. A breathy whine escaped his lips his head tipping back at the blissful pleasure. "So, about the fake-date thing," Sero's voice was low, near a moan, but not quite.

He cracked his eyes open, hips rocking into his movements, pleasure spreading through his gut, "Y-you really w-wanna talk about that now?" Niko's voice gave way into a pathetic moan, words shaky. 

"Better now than never. It's cute watching you struggle to speak," Sero teased, continuing at a slow pace, "So, what're you thinking?"

Niko tried to gain his bearings past the cock stretching him out, the flood of pleasure with each agonizingly slow thrust, "J-just be touchy," He breathed, "Make it obvious. H-hickies- y'know, fuck-" He cut himself off, fingernails digging into Sero's back hard, the smooth tan skin glistening with sweat.

"Like this?" Sero murmured, his hands gliding up Niko's thighs to his waist, holding him tightly, "Or..." His hand raised to rest lightly on Niko's throat, head tilting, "like this?"

Niko stuttered, unable to find his voice. Sero squeezed lightly, "You like that, Flare?" He hummed, one hand holding Niko's waist to rock him down.

He was trembling from the teasing stimulation, legs wrapping around the other man's hips, eyes half-lidded with desperation and lust, "Please~"

"Well, when you say it like that," Sero leaned down, pressing lazy kisses to his bare chest, teeth grazing over his nipples, causing his back to arch, "I can't resist."

Niko choked on his own breath, body arching underneath Sero as he quickened his pace, a blinding sort of pleasure making his head tilt back, consuming him. He could feel every inch of Sero's dick, every slight movement as he filled Niko to the core, pulling out just to go even deeper. "Like this, Flare?" Sero groaned against his neck, his voice holding a deep, rough edge.

"mmngh- fuck, j-just like that," Niko whined, words slurring together, his entire body buzzing with heat, "ke-keep going-" 

Sweat made their bodies collide in an almost aggressive way, the repeated collision charging the room with the unmistakable heat of sex. 

Niko only last a few more minutes before he came, Sero coming nearly directly after, pulling out and cumming on his stomach. The dark-haired man panted above, him, hovering only inches above the translucent, white fluid. Niko's breath was shaky, almost noisy from the aftershocks, eyes still slid shut. 

"God," Sero breathed, "Can't believe I'm only the second person you've fucked. You're a natural."

Niko opened his eyes, an indolent smile decorating his lips, "Yeah?"

Sero's face was flushed with a rosy shade, but he grinned, "Yeah. You feel fucking amazing."

Niko flashed a glance down at his stomach, raising his eyebrows, "Clearly. Wanna get a rag to clean this up?"

Sero gave him a breathy chuckle, nodding and sliding off the side of the bed, disappearing into the bathroom. He returned only a few seconds later with a wet rag, pulling his clothes on and tossing it to Niko. Niko took it with a nod, wiping himself off and setting the rag on the floor, "Shower?" He glanced at Sero questioningly.

"Go crazy." Sero smiled, "Your towel is in there. You can use my soap. I'll clean up out here."

"Thanks." Niko's fingers ghosted over his shoulder, closing the bathroom door behind him and stretching his arms above his head, relieving the tension buzzing along his spine. 

The bathroom tile send goosebumps up his legs, cool tile almost shocking compared to the heat that radiated off of him. Niko twisted the shower knob, which squeaked with wear, water stuttering out of the head at first, before it came to be a steady stream. 

He waited till steam poured off of the water like smoke, and then stepped inside, hissing through his teeth at the heat. Adjusting the knob, he eased into the warm water, drenching his sweat-soaked hair and rinsing himself off. The droplets cascaded down his smooth skin, running over the white scars on his arms, over the thin, jagged scar running along his back. 

Niko washed himself with Sero's soaps and dried off using the towel that Sero had let him borrow. He came out 25 minutes later, shaking out damp hair. Sero was sitting on the couch on his phone, and looked up when Niko entered, an easygoing smile on his lips, "Good shower?"

He nodded, plopping down beside Sero with a yawn. Sero chuckled, "Do you want to nap? I was planning to go outside for a smoke and grab coffee, and you can sleep while I'm gone."

"No, I'll be okay. Can I come with you? I need some fresh air anyways." Niko glanced at him hopefully.

Sero raised his eyebrows, "Duh, what type of question is that? Do you want a hoodie or anything?" He pointed to his coat rack, where an assortment of jackets and hoodies hung. Niko followed his gesture, teasing his inner cheek between his teeth before nodding decisively, rising to stand with a stretch. 

Sero stayed seated, tying his boots while Niko selected a black hoodie with a band logo on it, throwing on a thicker zip up over it and grabbing his own boots. 

The winter air was still bitingly cold, making his nose and cheeks a rosy fuscia. His hair was still damp, which only added to the cold, but he was well enough with the jackets and his jeans. 

They walked in relative silence, Sero passing him an already-lit cigarette, as he always did, and leading him down the sidewalk. The concrete was a bit slippery, frost and a thin layer of ice creeping over the edges of it as if it was infecting the pale material. The grass- which Niko was surprised was even alive- sparkled in the weak sunlight, icy blades crunchy and delicate. 

All of the trees' leaves had already fallen, leaving spindly branches stretching out over their heads, the last surviving leaved barely clinging to life. Niko absorbed the area around him, happy to just enjoy the quiet winter afternoon. Smoke and steam alike billowed from his lips, from both his warm breath and the cigarette, the smoke bathing on his tongue. It wasn't delicious per se, but he enjoyed the act of it when he was around Sero, and it was something he'd grown to like. It felt almost like a bonding act.

By the time they reached the small coffee shop a few blocks away, they'd already thrown out the butts of the cigarettes. Sero held the door for him, and they stepped inside. Niko was immediately hit with a wave of comforting warmth, the smell of fresh-brewed coffee wafting through the air. There were a few people inside - an older couple talking quietly over coffees and pastries, and another few who sat at various tables. 

The cashier, a man with purple-dyed hair, looked up as they entered, offering a reserved smile and waving. Sero cast a fleeting look at Niko, "Do you know what you want?"

Niko glanced at him, blinking, "I didn't know I was getting anything. Is it okay if I do?" Sero rolled his eyes, prompting him to continue, "Hmm.. I'll just have a chai."

Sero walked up to the register, Niko trailing along like a lost puppy, sticking a step behind him to avoid having to talk to anyone. Not shy, just anti-social, preferring to avoid interaction with possible. "Hey, can we just get a hot chai and a white mocha?"

The cashier nodded, tapping on the screen before looking up, "Mediums, or..?" Sero nodded, and the cashier spoke again, "Alrighty, your total will be 549 yen."

Sero paid with a card, and then they stood near the counter's edge. Niko looked up at him, smiling warmly, "Thanks."

Sero waved him off with an amicable smile, "No problem, Flare." He paused, glancing to where the barista was making their drinks, before examining him, "Will you be staying the night?"

Niko gnawed at his inner cheek for a moment before shaking his head, "No, I don't think so, I need to plan for Winter Formal. It's the 28th, by the way. Do you think you can pick me up?" His eyes searched Sero's for a moment, but the black haired man didn't hesitate before nodding, playfully smiling.

"What type of 'date' would I be if I didn't give you a ride?" He teased, "I can pick you up at 17:30, if that's alright?"

Niko nodded, running his fingers along the edge of his nail in anticipation, "That's perfect. It starts at 18:00, so we'll be a little early, but that gives us time to meet up with Sei and Atsuo."

Sero nodded, flashing him a smile, "Sounds perfect. Are you sure it's okay if I come?" Niko glanced at him in surprise, and Sero added, "I mean, I don't go to UA, and I'm a couple years older than the rest of you."

He waved a hand dismissively, "Yeah, don't worry about it. Each student can bring one extra person, it doesn't matter if you're from UA or not. Trust me, I seriously doubt anyone will so much as question your age."

Sero visibly relaxed, and Niko raised his eyebrows, "You're also not that much older than me. Four years?" He blew a raspberry, rolling his eyes, "Try ten. You're fine, Sero."

Sero's eyebrows shot up, then narrowed as he looked at Niko, as if trying to see into his head, "Man, you're fucking nuts. He better be hot as hell. And not a weirdo."

Niko scowled, muttering, "You really think I'd fall for a predator? I know how to keep myself safe. And yeah, he is hot as hell." Scarlet crept over his features, "And good."

Sero wrinkled his nose, "I didn't need to know that. But it makes sense. He's probably got a lot more experience than both of us."

Niko shrugged, nodding, but his mind was elsewhere. The taste of him, the heat of his body against mine, his- He had to abruptly cut off his train of thought to avoid getting too excited, though he could only assume it was visible on his face because of the way Sero was looking at him. 

"Don't say anything." Niko muttered, looking away. Sero only looked at him with what he assumed was sympathy before shrugging, and Niko changed the subject abruptly, uncomfortable with the thoughts in his head, "Should we head back? I need to study."

"Yeah, yeah, let's go," Sero nodded, taking the subject change gracefully and leading the way out of the cafe. 

Niko went home shortly after returning to Sero's apartment, making quick work of the near-empty roads and going straight up to his room. He didn't go straight to his desk, though, pulling out his planned outfit for the winter formal. It wasn't anything crazy, but it was a little show-y. Enough to draw attention. Eyes tracing up and down his form in the mirror, Niko tightened the harness around his torso so that it hugged his chest and waist. 

He was wearing a classic black suit, ironed perfectly, with a collared white shirt underneath. A black tie was tucked under the folds of the jacket, clean, crisp lines tailored perfectly to his size. The stand-out was a black body-harness, two adjustable straps running around his waist and lower-ribcage, while two came up over his shoulders, tightened to a snug (and comfortable) setting.

The pants were a similar tailored black style, and he wore his black combat boots. 

Niko examined himself closely, eyes narrowed. It looked perfect, he just had to make sure his hair was freshly cleaned so that it tied the look together. Atsuo would be doing minor eyeliner on him. 

Changing back into comfortable clothes, he sighed, sitting down at his desk and opening up his notebook. The JSL final wouldn't be that hard or important for his grades, but the perfectionist in him wouldn't let him get by with anything less than an A in it, so he studied over the hand-gestures, practicing them until his eyes stung from looking between the neat handwriting and himself in the computer camera. 

The topic was meant to be deaf-culture, per se, and the struggles or discrimination that deaf folk might experience in day to day life. It delved briefly into history, but since it was only meant to be 3-5 minutes long, it couldn't get that in depth. Obviously, he'd be talking alongside it, and he'd already set up a presentation, so it was mainly memorizing the fluidity of his hand-gestures. 

Eventually, he gave in to the stress of working for over an hour on it, and crept into his bed, turning on his phone and pulling the fluffy green duvet over himself. It was warm, almost comforting the ache of stress that stiffened his spine, and Niko relaxed into the comfortable bed. 

He wouldn't be up all that long, but he wanted to clean his room a bit before bed. It was starting to get messy, clothes discarded along the polished wood flooring, notebooks stacked messily on the desk. His aisle was still up, and he hadn't put away his paints from his project in oil painting yet either.

He laid in bed for thirty minutes or so, texting Atsuo about his day and scrolling on his social media, before he forced himself to get up and tidy. 

Tossing the clothes in his laundry basket, his hand stalled on a familiar hoodie. Not his, not Sero's, but Aizawa's. He could only tell because of the scent, the faint cologne and smell of Aizawa's sweat catching his attention. He lifted the hoodie. Plain black, but clearly bigger than his or Sero's size. He itched to bring it closer, to bury his face in the fabric and savor the scent while it lasted, but something held him back. The deep ache, opening up a raw wound in his chest. He gave in. 

Pressing the soft clothing to his face, he breathed in the familiar scent, shutting his eyes. It smelled like warmth, like the arms he'd grown familiar with, wrapped lazily around him as he slept, the soft tickle of Aizawa's hair, the blanket of darkness that his gaze held. 

His throat tightened, and he yanked it away, tossing it into an empty corner of his bed. He couldn't bring himself to wash it, but he tried to ignore it, letting it sit in that corner as if that would stop him from indulging. 

Trying to shake off the clinging cobwebs of his memories, he finished throwing the dirty clothes in his laundry basket, moving on to his notebooks, sorting through them and organizing them in his bookshelf until he reached the base one, a green, lined notebook opened on an essay rough draft. It was edited in red pen, neat, clean handwriting pointing out clunky parts and offering suggestions. 

Another fucking reminder. Niko stared at the handwriting before shutting the notebook rather aggressively and shoving it into his shelf, hands trembling slightly. Ignoring the desperation, the uncontrollable urge to call him, he organized all of his paints into rows on in the cabinet under his shelf and shut the doors with a small click, sitting down on his bed once again and creeping under the blankets. Unlike last time, now the warmth felt lonely. It felt empty, lacking the presence he craved oh so much.

His mind was assaulted with images of Aizawa, drawing the hoodie closer despite himself. The loneliness faded to something else entirely as Niko's thoughts shifted to frustration, and then... Well. Reoccurring cravings. 

His taste, his tongue, the possessive roaming of his fingers all over Niko, the rough grip in his hair, the intense pleasure that he gave Niko so easily. 

Niko's hand slipped beneath his waistband, breathing shaky, the scent almost intoxicating. He couldn't help himself, drowning in the addicting fantasy of what could've been. 

Chapter Text

Niko very rapidly discovered a new development. And an incredibly infuriating one, at that. 

Ignoring. 

He noticed it the second he entered Aizawa's classroom. The black haired man seemed to be completely blind to his presence, briefly greeting (more like acknowledging) Atsuo but not him, not even giving him so much as a passing look. 

He didn't mind, at first, but after asking a question, and Aizawa didn't even look at him, it started to get on his nerves. Every time he looked over the class, he would jump right over Niko, and Niko found it... frustrating, to say the least. Devastating, more accurately. 

"Isn't this better for you?" Atsuo asked under his breath upon noticing Niko's darkened gaze, "I thought you'd prefer it this way, honestly."

Niko barely noticed the other man speaking, his gaze burning into Aizawa. He couldn't seem to look away for more than a few seconds, almost obsessively. What is he doing? Did he find someone else? Did he move on? His gut churned, heat like molten lava pooling in his abdomen and seeping through his veins, blazing through him. Look at me. 

"Nik." Atsuo hissed, grabbing his shoulder. Niko jumped looking at Atsuo in surprise, who was all but glaring at him - not out of anger, but a sort of intense concern. Atsuo's eyebrows drew together, his eyes searching Niko's, "Did you hear what I said?"

"Uh... No, could you say it again?" Niko asked, his gaze darting fleetingly to Aizawa, who of course, wasn't looking at him. Fuck you. Atsuo sighed, nodding as Niko's attention returned, albeit slowly, having to tear his gaze away. 

"I said, isn't this what you wanted?" His words were soft, barely audible, "Maybe it can help you move on?"

Niko blinked, his eyes averting to the floor. It should've been that way, but he couldn't stop obsessing over it now. Every few minutes, if that, he found himself unable to stop himself from looking in Aizawa's direction, heart accelerating like a panicked mouse every time he found zero consideration or attention towards him. "What if he found someone else?" He breathed the words, eyebrows knitting together as he stared at the professor. He was leant over a students desk, jaw visibly tense even from the distance, eyes narrowed to shadowy slits. 

Atsuo sighed, and Niko saw him turn his head towards Aizawa through his peripherals, "Maybe you should try to do the same, Nik."

Niko's gaze snapped to the calico-haired man, staring holes into his friend. Even the thought nearly shattered his heart into a million pieces, expression crashing into a terrified one, glimpsing his professor once again as if it might be the last time he ever saw him, "I can't." He whispered, voice cracking, "I can't."

"Take the day off, Niko," Atsuo urged, his hand coming to rest gently on Niko's shoulder, "I'll cover for you. Just go get some air, and come back later. We can talk then, okay?"

Niko swallowed hard, breath fluttering in his throat, "Um, yeah. Okay."

"Breathe, you're going to be okay. I promise." Atsuo's voice was warm like that of a freshly cleaned blanket, emerald eyes softening, "Just text if you need me, yeah?"

Niko nodded, unable to force any more words out. He shoved his notebook into his backpack, unable to control the urgency, eyes prickling with hot tears. Aizawa didn't so much as look up as he left the classroom, agitated and thrown off by the sudden change in behavior. He couldn't stop thinking, his mind racing with all of the possibilities. The same one looped in his head, he found someone else. He found someone better. He doesn't even care.

Not having a car to sit in, he darted into the staff bathroom, locking the door behind him and sitting against the wall, pulling his knees up to his chest. Atsuo had told him to get air, and he knew this would only make things worse, but he pulled up Aizawa's social media page, scouring it for any information. Nothing. Everything was the exact same as when he'd last checked. The same posts, no stories, no highlights. Nothing. He blazed through Aizawa's small list of following, but nothing helped. None of the profiles mentioned him. 

This did not help in the slightest. He texted Atsuo after thirty minutes of overthinking, of obssessively seaching for answered, and let him in, locking the door behind him. Atsuo sat on the floor in front of him, visibly worried. 

"Look, Niko, it's okay if you're not over him- and I know I've told you this before, but if you're not getting anything from this relationship, I really think you should switch classes. I'm sure it would be no problem, electives aren't a big deal and finals are already over. Or, you could just drop it entirely. It doesn't really matter at this point." Atsuo spoke quietly, his green gaze locked onto Niko's, which flitted about, unable to hold eye-contact. Suddenly, the old tiles on the floor seemed so much more interesting than the concerned man before him. 

Niko couldn't even stomach that. The intense jealousy and frustration had settled the awful feeling of nausea into his gut, swallowing down the urge to vomit and remaining silent. Atsuo allowed it to stretch for a few seconds, before he suggested, "Just think about it, okay? Go get some air, I already told him you had a doctors appointment."

"He asked?" Niko's eyes snapped up, relief easing his worry, and Atsuo winced, looking away. 

"...No, I just didn't want you to be marked down from skipping." He said, apprehensive, and the hope was instantly wiped away. Niko looked away, completely crestfallen. It was like there was a knife shove right through his ribcage, and each word twisted the knife deeper and deeper into his heart. 

"Yeah, uh, okay. Thanks, Atsuo." He eventually spoke, his words monotone, rising to stand, "I'll text you later if I feel up to it, yeah?"

Atsuo nodded, hesitating before pulling Niko into his arms. He melted into the hug, burying his face in Atsuo's shoulder. "Just call me if you need me. I'll be there, Nik. I love you, okay? Try not to think about it too hard."

Niko nodded, swallowing and pulling back, "Love you too, Atsu. Thank you."

Atsuo smiled sympathetically, nodding and opening the door, "You don't have to thank me."

Niko hesitated, stepping out of the door and nodding before he exited from the side door of the school, leaving Atsuo behind and heading to where he'd parked his motorcycle. He wasted no time taking his helmet out of the small compartment in the front, and his jacket out of his backpack, putting them both on to protect himself from anything that might happen when he was riding. 

He pulled out of the parking lot quickly, driving almost mindlessly, like he always did when he was troubled. Not unaware, but with no particular destination in mind. . The wind was cold, but his gear kept him warm, music blasting in his ears from the headset built into it. He drove for only fifteen minutes before stopping at the docks near the ocean. 

Being near the ocean, let alone swimming, was rare in winter, so the area was completely empty. The breeze was far stronger here, icy wind biting into his fingers despite his gloves. He didn't even take off his helmet, sitting down on the edge of the splintering wood and staring down at the white-crested waves. They crashed against jagged, algae covered rocks, sea-mist wafting into the air. 

He sat like that until he had to leave for work, jumping between using his phone to (definitely not obsessively) stalk and re-read messages, and staring blankly at the waves. His fingertips were frozen even through the reinforced motorcycle gloves he still wore. 

Once he got to his work, he changed into his uniform, setting his backpack in the lockers and walking to the front. He was working with Momo today, who was already standing in the front, early as always. He got to work making orders while Momo managed the register and helped out with making coffees. Niko primarily took them out to the customers, occasionally climbing the steps up to the study area where various students, both high school and college, worked in hushed murmurs and relative silence. 

He was on auto-pilot his entire shift. Even his companion for the day asked if he was alright, clearly concerned with his depressed attitude. He obviously responded with, "I'm fine, just tired," But she must not have believed him because she took register the whole time, which Niko was grateful for. Talking to customers was the last thing he wanted to do today. 

After he got off, and changed, he started driving again. Not far, just around town, since he wasn't ready to go home yet. He drove past his old house, only seeing the glow from the house, since the curtains were always shut tightly. He was sure his mother was home, since her car was in the driveway. He looked at Bolt fondly as he passed, giving the car a little wave with one finger. The car had served him well. 

He kept going, a few minutes up, crossing a few blocks. He didn't have anywhere in mind, exactly, but Niko's hands led him down a familiar route. He only realized where he was going when he was stopped in the road, looking up at glass-walled apartments. Aizawa's. 

He could see into his apartment, third floor up. It wasn't hard to see inside because of how large the windows are, and since there was no glare from the sun. The living space was dimly lit, an unidentifiable shape leaned up against the window. He squinted, lifting his tinted visor. There were two people. His stomach dropped. 

One was slimmer, but he couldn't see very well. Niko couldn't control himself as he took a left, driving into a near-empty parking garage and heading up to the top floor. This is so fucking weird. I shouldn't be spying. The thought chanted over and over in his head, but he was out of control, driven by something raw and almost feral. 

He stopped behind a pillar, shrouded in shadow, covered by the top of the parking garage. He would be virtually invisible here, turning off his motorcycle and peering across the street fervently. The person leaning against the window- the slim one, was a woman. She had sleek, long black hair, and she wore a tight outfit, one that Niko could faintly make out to be semi-revealing. Aizawa was standing across from her, both of their lips moving. He seemed at ease, his head not moving, assumedly fixed to the woman. 

Niko stared hard, jealousy possessing him like a wild wave from the ocean, nauseous from the intensity of the uncontrollable emotion. He got back on his motorcycle, turning it on and fleeing back down, slowing by the apartments again. He gave one last look up, scoffing in disgust, and revved the bike loudly, the noise reverberating in his chest and off the empty walls of the parking garage like a roar. He knew it would draw the attention of the pair, and he knew Aizawa would recognize him. In fact, Niko was glad he would. He took off down the street far faster than he should've been going, not looking back as he fought off the stinging in his eyes. 

His eyes betrayed him, though, tears soaking into the ski-mask he wore under the helmet for warmth and comfort, twisting the throttle faster, shifting gears as he tore down the highway and definitely-illegal speeds. 

He halved the normal time to his and Hizashi's place, pulling into the driveway as he breathed heavily, adrenaline flooding his veins. And then, like a wildfire jealousy lit him on fire, igniting an inferno in his chest. He was shaking, storming inside and going straight to his room. He stripped off his clothes aggressively, tossing them aside without a care, glaring at nothing in particular. 

The anger was consuming him, flames scorching him from the inside out. If he was in a cartoon, he'd be steaming, smoke shooting out of his ears. It was late, but he got in the shower, not bothering to turn the water warm.

The water was icily cold, and he was instantly trembling from the freezing water, soaking into his hair and flooding over his goose-bumped skin. Niko practically crumpled to the floor, trembling like a leaf from the overwhelming assault of emotions and the freezing water alike. He couldn't feel the tears dripping from his face, couldn't even pinpoint why exactly he was crying. 

There was too much to feel, it was all too real. Up until now, he'd been able to ignore the fact him and Aizawa weren't together anymore, and that they wouldn't get back together. But the pure, raw pain of seeing him with someone else, talking casually like they used to do? It was gut wrenching, and fuck, heart-breaking. He hadn't thought Aizawa would pursue anyone, especially not when he'd been watching Niko so closely up until today. 

Fuck him, fuck him, Niko's mind was flooded with the echoing words, almost desperately, frantically thinking it over and over as if that would take away the hurt. When he couldn't take the icy cold any longer, he slammed the knob down and wrapping the towel around his trembling body, teeth chattering. He dried himself off blankly, throwing on comfortable clothes and crashing into his bed. He didn't look at his phone, staring at the ceiling. His mind was too full of every single emotion he could possibly be feeling in the moment. Niko couldn't focus on anything, even if he wanted to. 

He laid like that for awhile. It might've been hours, or thirty minutes. He didn't cry, or hit things, or do anything. He just laid there, thinking. Grieving, hating, fixating. It was terrifyingly uncontrollable and all too fucking real. Perhaps everything was setting in after weeks, hell, months of ignoring it. The consequences of his actions, finally. 

He went to the bathroom around 02:30, sitting on the cold floor and pulling his knees up to his chest. The same sensation he'd felt months ago, sitting in his old bathroom at Sora's house, seeped through the cold floor into his fingertips. His eyes darted to the cabinet. No. 

The voice was weak, though. His fingers stalled on the cabinet knob, swallowing. Stop. He pulled it open. It won't be a habit. Niko reached inside, fingers trembling, eyes fluttering shut before pulling it out, breathing shaky. It won't. I won't let it.

Niko fell asleep probably around three in the morning, finally crashing from the long day, the overwhelming emotions. His dreams weren't scary, not nightmares, but equally as heart-wrenching. Dreams of Aizawa, of their domestic moments, of him coming back to Niko and then living happily. In his dreams, he forgot the conflict, basking in the warmth, the care of the older man. It was blissful, while it lasted. 

And then, when at last, he woke up to his alarm, he could barely get out of bed. In fact, he wouldn't have, if he wasn't fueled by a bitter rage. 

Chapter Text

It was Monday when Oboro finally arrived. Hizashi had texted him during work that Oboro had landed at the airport in a nearby city - since theirs wasn't major enough to actually have an airport. By the time Niko got off of work, Oboro had already settled in to the house. 

Niko got home around 23:15. Not because him and Sero hadn't finished the close early, but because they'd gotten... a little distracted in the staff bathroom. Stopping outside the front door, Niko found himself nervous to open it, fingers hesitating on the doorknob. Swallowing, he pushed the door open, taking off his boots and jacket, and peering into the living room. 

A lean man with fluffy platinum, almost blueish hair and bright blue eyes was sitting beside Hizashi, both looking delighted to be in each others presence, eyes swerving to look at Niko as he stepped into view nervously.

Oboro stood up first, beaming at Niko warmly, "You must be Nikolaus! It's a pleasure to meet you, kid! I'm Oboro." His tone was enthusiastic, holding out a hand. 

Niko took it awkwardly, not used to the American greeting, giving Oboro a nervous smile, "Just Niko. It's great to meet you, Oboro. How was your flight? Are you settling in okay?"

It felt wrong for other people to call him Nikolaus. It felt... so formal, and Aizawa had been the only one to call him that regularly. The only one where it felt normal. 

Oboro nodded amicably, sitting back down beside Hizashi while Niko took the arm-chair across from them, flashing a nervous smile in the blond man's direction. Hizashi returned it with a reassuring one of his own. Oboro nodded, sighing as he responded, "Yeah, well, it was a long flight. 12 hours, give or take, but it was pretty smooth the whole flight."

Niko relaxed a little at how easygoing he was, curiosity perking in his eyes. The platinum haired man seemed to have a familiarity towards Niko despite barely meeting him, and it was very appreciated, "What's America like? I've never been. Err, obviously."

"It's... It's interesting," Oboro admitted, laughing and looking towards Hizashi, "But it is cool to experience an entirely different culture. I mainly lived near where I worked, but in my spare time I spent time exploring the city around me. Folk are definitely different there, and the cities can be a bit more grimey." 

He paused, noting with a more soft tone, "There are also a lot more people living on the streets. It's rather sad, actually. It's normalized there, but it can be quite the shock when you first arrive. Makes me miss Japan even more." He glanced at Hizashi, and they exchanged fond smiles, "I'm glad to be back."

Niko chuckled. He'd never seen Hizashi so bright. He was almost glowing, fingers interlaced with Oboro's, though he was mostly (uncharacteristically) quiet, seeming happy to let the other two chat. "And your work?" Niko asked after a moment, his head tilting to the side, "Do you like it there?"

Oboro's face lit up, nodding enthusiastically, "I do. It's very different from the work I did here when I first got into my job. They do things very differently there, but it's equally as enjoyable. I've gotten along pretty well learning English and my accent isn't as thick as it used to be."

Niko nodded, his eyes fixed to Oboro intently, "Will you be staying long?"

He shook his head, "Only a week or so. I have to go back in time to get everything prepped for something else we're working on, I'm just on a sort of paid-vacation right now."

 The white haired man paused and looked at Niko curiously, "You're at UA, right?"

When he nodded again, Oboro smiled, "Fourth year? What classes are you taking right now?"

"Well, technically, I'm supposed to be a fifth year, but I got held back," Niko admitted sheepishly, "And this is our last week of school before I actually go into fifth year, but right now, I'm taking History, Earth Sciences, Social Studies and Japanese. I already finished my math credits."

Oboro nodded, head tilting, "You're not taking any art classes?"

Niko shrugged, looking away awkwardly, "Uh, just oil painting. Next year I'm doing general art, painting for one semester and anatomy arts for the second semester art classes, to make up for it."

"Oh, no way! Oil painting - Shouta still teaches that, right?" Oboro looked at Hizashi, grinning. Niko's heart sank at the mans name, swallowing as he made eye contact with Hizashi, who offered him a sympathetic smile. 

"Yeah, he does." Hizashi responded, glancing between them uncertainly, as if something had just occurred to him, "Actually, I think he teaches general art, painting and... anatomy too."

Niko pointedly avoided his burning curiosity.

Oboro chuckled, attention returning to Niko, "He's a great professor. It's been, what, a year since I saw him? How's he doing? Do you like his classes?"

Niko opened his mouth to speak, but any solid words he had died in his mouth, and he shrugged, "He's good, I guess. I don't know him very well."

Hizashi cleared his throat, changing the subject, to Niko's relief, "What other classes are you taking next year?"

Blinking, Niko breathed a sigh of relief, head clearing slightly. He could see the look of confusion on Oboro's face, but he assumed the other man didn't want to push, because the confusion faded after a moment, attention turning to Niko. "Japanese, Political History, Multimedia and Graphic Design." Niko listed them off the top of his head. He'd already planned out the rest of his time at UA, but past that, he wasn't exactly sure what he wanted to do. 

Oboro nodded along with his words, "That's great, Niko. I'm glad you're getting along well there. I went there, and Hizashi, as I'm sure you know. I've heard Emi is still a professor there, as well?"

Niko laughed lightly, still relieved that he didn't have to talk about Aizawa, "Yeah, she teaches Multimedia. She's great. Very energetic."

"Oh, she always has been." Oboro nodded, "I'm glad you enjoy her classes too. Anyway, how's your life been, Niko? Whatcha been up to?"

Crying over Aizawa. Niko shrugged, "I've been working a lot, at Midnight Brew. It's a cafe near UA. Finals week just passed, so not much has been going on, but we have Winter Formal on Friday."

Hizashi blinked in surprise, as if he'd forgotten, "Oh right! Do you know who you're going with, or what you're going to wear?"

Niko nodded, a smile curling at his lips, "I'm going with Sero, and yeah, I already have an outfit plan. We're planning to meet Atsuo and Sei there." Oboro looked entirely lost, so Niko explained, "Sero is my coworker and close friend," Hizashi caught his gaze, waggling his eyebrows with a playful grin. Niko ignored it, flushing hot, and continued, "And Atsuo is my best friend. Sei is his boyfriend."

"So... Is Sero your date?" Hizashi implored with a raised eyebrow. 

"Kind of." Niko chuckled, "Not romantic. But yeah, he'll be my date. We're not interested in each other, but we get along really well."

Oboro piped up at the subject change, "Do you have a partner?" 

Again, Niko found his words caught in his throat, catching Hizashi's gaze. There was an awkward silence, and Niko managed, "Uh, it's.. Complicated." Oboro didn't press, letting it go as he clearly noticed it was a sensitive subject.

They talked for a few minutes longer, but Oboro looked visibly tired, and Hizashi suggested, "Maybe you should head to bed, love? You look exhausted."

Oboro nodded, yawning, "Good idea." He stood up, stretching, "I'll talk to you tomorrow, Niko. 'Zashi, are you coming?" He looked at Hizashi curiously, who nodded. 

"In a minute. I'll meet you in there."

Oboro nodded, disappearing down the hall and shutting the door to the bedroom, leaving Hizashi and Niko alone. 

Niko moved to sit on the couch, also yawning. Hizashi spoke softly, probing, "Do you mind if I ask, how're you doing?"

Niko shrugged, looking away as his gut twisted into knots. "I've been better. I'm just kind of exhausted." It was a lie, but Hizashi didn't have to know that. His upper arms stung at the words, and he glanced away, swallowing. 

"And, y'know, Shouta?" Hizashi pressed gently, searching his gaze, "How's that going?"

Niko avoided his eyes, shrugging in what he hoped was a casual way, "I mean, my feelings aren't gone, if that's what you're asking."

Hizashi huffed in amusement, "I wouldn't expect them to be." There was something he clearly wasn't saying, and Niko assumed it was about Aizawa, since they were fairly close friends, but he didn't ask. It wasn't his place to get in between Hizashi and Aizawa's friendship, no matter how curious he was. "Niko, maybe you should drop his class," Hizashi suggested, "Or alter your schedule for next year so you can focus on yourself more. I don't think it's helping to be around him all the time?"

Niko met his gaze fleetingly, anxiously, "I... Probably should, but I don't know." I can't. "I don't want to."

Hizashi gave an understanding nod, "I know the feeling, and I won't push you. Just take care of yourself, okay? Shouta isn't the type to discriminate based off history alone, but if your mental health isn't doing well, I'd encourage you to switch your classes. I've been a little worried about you." His words were lighthearted, but Niko could tell he was genuinely concerned from the look in his eyes. 

"I'll think about it." Niko promised, meeting his gaze, "I just can't promise anything beyond that." He hesitated, the memory of Aizawa and the woman flashing through his head. He spoke weakly, trying to come off as casual, like he didn't really care, but failing painfully badly, "I know it's not my place to ask, and you don't have to say anything if you don't want to, but.. I heard that Aizawa got a girlfriend. Is that true?"

Hizashi looked baffled, but he only shook his head, "I don't know. If he did, he didn't tell me."

Niko nodded, but he wasn't exactly comforted by the words. Aizawa didn't seem the type of person to let people into his private life if they weren't prying into it. 

"You should go to sleep," Hizashi stood up, stretching, "Have you eaten?"

Niko nodded, "I had some leftover pastry from work." He stood up too, picking up his jacket and boots, "I am tired, though. Goodnight, Hizashi. I'll see you tomorrow."

Hizashi held his gaze for a moment before finally nodding, returning the farewell and heading into his room. Niko walked up the stairs, into his room, and set his things down. He changed into pajamas and sat down in his bed. He had a few unread texts from Sero, so he opened those first.

sero :3: Hey, do you want to come over on weds? I got these horror movie tickets and I thought you might wanna come :)
me: im down that sounds great :3 what time should i come over?
sero :3: Whenever you're ready. Movie starts at 18:00, so maybe around 17:30, so I have time to drive us there?
me: yeah, sounds perf sero
me: see you wednesday ;3
sero :3: See ya, Flare ;)

Niko chuckled, glad to have something to look forward to, and set his phone down. He had a few messages from Atsuo too, but they were about how Niko was doing, and he couldn't bring himself to respond at the moment. 

Niko wasn't exactly huge on horror movies, but it wasn't bad enough to actively avoid them, so he sure it would be fine. Plus, he could use the stress reliever - whether it be smoking with Sero, or sleeping with him.

It was a good way to ignore- uhmm, set aside, his feelings for Aizawa, and it was easy to drown in the pleasure. Sero knew what he was doing, and while it wasn't the same as with Aizawa, it was almost as good. Well... Maybe not almost, but it was still good. 

That Wednesday, Niko took to Sero's house after class. It wasn't a far drive, pulling into the apartment parking lot and weasling his bike to park in front of Sero's car, killing the power so he could head up. He walked up the splintering wooden stairs, knocking a few times on Sero's door. There was the sound of footsteps thunked inside before the metal lock clicked out of the way, and Sero swung the door open. 

Niko blinked, his eyes dropping down to his bare chest, decorated with marks that Niko had left, and then up to his face again. "Sorry, I didn't realize you weren't ready yet," Niko pulled off his helmet, shaking out his ruffled black hair, "Do you want me to wait here?"

Sero shook his head, "No, no come in! I don't mind."

He let Niko inside, grabbing a damp white towel from the arm of the couch and toweling off his wet hair as Niko leaned back against the door, watching him. "Excited?" Sero cast a cheeky grin over his shoulder, and Niko snorted, shrugging. 

"I still haven't heard what movie we're watching," He examined Sero, who only winked, not responding to the question. Niko rolled his eyes, "Oookay, mysterious."

Sero laughed, disappearing into his room and reappearing only a few seconds later, pulling a black shirt over his head. Niko tipped his head to the side, "Did you size up your gauges?"

Sero nodded, pointing the the black rings in his ears, "Yup! Just got up to zero." He looked pleased with himself, glancing in the small mirror hanging off the wall and admiring the smoky black plugs. 

Niko chuckled to himself, amused by Sero's self-indulgent admiring. Waving a hand playfully, he tilted his head, "Ready to go, hotshot?"

Sero grinned at him, "Yeah, sorry. C'mon, Flare." He slipped on his shoes- a pair of scuffed converse- and led the way out of the door, swinging his keys around one finger as Niko followed him. Niko slipped into his passenger seat, buckling his seatbelt and pulling his feet up to sit more comfortably. "You wanna put on some music?" Sero offered him the aux cord.

Niko took it with a shameless smile, "You know me so well." He plugged his phone in, putting on one of his playlists that they'd both come to know well. The instant the first song started playing, Sero's eyes sought his out, raising his eyebrows, a sly smile appearing on his lips. 

Niko returned it with an 'innocent' one of his own, blinking at Sero through wide brown eyes. "Play all innocent now," Sero teased softly, "We'll see just how 'innocent' you are after the movie."

Niko flooded with warmth, breathing shakily in an attempt to calm himself down a bit, "Oh, fuck off," He breathed nervously, giving Sero a fleeting glance.

"You're cute when you're nervous," Sero sing-songed back, "I know you like it."

Looking away to try and calm himself, he let out a light chuckle, shaking his head. Sero was incredibly confident in himself, and his forwardness was one of the things Niko liked about him. 

When they got into the theater, after buying snacks, they took their seats. It started just after they sat down, and Sero bumped his shoulder, whispering playfully, "Just us here. Don't get too excited, Flare."

Scarlet rushed to his face, grateful for the darkness to mask it, "Really?" Niko responded, meeting his gaze in the moody lighting, "You don't have the balls to do anything in here."

"You wanna test that?" Sero challenged, his fingers gliding along Niko's thigh. The gesture sent tremors up his spine, and his breath hitched, "Cause I think we both know that's not true."

Niko's eyes were locked with his, ardor burning through his veins, "Don't." He breathed, "You know how bad my self control is. I doubt you wanna waste the movie tickets you paid for."

Sero's eyebrows raised, his hand tightening around Niko's sensitive skin, "Oh please, they were five dollars each. How do you know this wasn't just an excuse to see you?"

Niko searched his gaze, "Was it?"

Sero grinned, "You really have to ask?" There was a beat of silence, and Sero added, "My car?"

A smile split through Niko's breathless lust and he shook his head, "Your car."

Sero all but dragged him all the way back to the parking garage, opening the back seat and waving his arm dramatically, "You first, gorgeous."

Niko shuffled backwards into the back seat, Sero climbing on top of him and slamming the door shut with a devilish grin. His lips pressed against Niko's, Niko breathing heavily, wrapping his legs around Sero's hips, basically trembling. 

Niko got home late that night, and fell asleep almost immediately after getting into bed.

Chapter Text

Winter formal came up fast. Since they'd already finished finals, most of Niko's class time was just.. killing time. Minor activities to pretend like they were still doing important things. He ended up skipping oil painting for that entire week, too upset over seeing Aizawa in general to even stomach it if he wouldn't be focusing on something. 

By the time Friday rolled around, he was dying to get on break. Not that it would be much of a "break" since Sosaki had scheduled him literally every single day except for Sunday. To make it even worse, he worked five hour shifts. Every. Day. Niko was definitely not looking forward to it. 

Regardless, he was looking forward to the dance. Especially with Sero and Atsuo by his side. Sei too, but since Niko wasn't as close with the introverted male, it wouldn't be that big of a difference.

Sero drove him to the dance, arriving only a few minutes after it started. He was clad in a dark red button up with the sleeves rolled up, and a black, tailored vest. Niko was wearing his outfit that he'd planned last week, harness fastened just enough to hug his body and show off the waist he'd grown nicely into. 

When they arrived, there were students filing inside. Sero's hand rested at the small of Niko's back, giving him a playful smile as he led Niko inside. They'd gone over how touchy Sero was meant to be in order to give off 'date' energy, but obviously, Niko was exclusively happy to only have him as a friend. And fuck buddy.

When they entered, the atmosphere changed drastically. For one, it was warmer inside, and the lights were far dimmer, colored beams striking out along the walls. There was music playing, and some students were gathered in groups or chatting together. Niko looked around, his eyes skimming over the students idly. Beside him, Sero leaned down to speak in his ear, "Do you see Atsuo?"

Niko shook his head, teeth teasing his bottom lip nervously, "He'll probably be here in a few minutes, we can wait." Sero nodded, his hand resting on Niko's waist casually, their proximity close enough for Niko to smell his scent.

Niko twisted in his grip, lacing his arms around behind Sero's neck casually. Sero grinned, letting both hands rest on his waist, teasing, "Someone's showing off. Did you see your little crush?"

Niko blushed at the thought of Aizawa, shaking his head. His vision scanned the back wall as he spoke, "No, I haven't actually-" His words died abruptly in his throat as his eyes settled on a familiar figure leaning against the wall. "Actually, speaking of, there he is." Niko returned his gaze to Sero, who chuckled.

Aizawa didn't so much as look in Niko's direction as Niko glanced at him, but he didn't linger too long on the older man, allowing Sero's presence to distract him. After only a few minutes, Atsuo and Sei came through the door, poking Niko's shoulder. The gesture stung hot, alighting a burning sensation in his arm. He fought back a flinch, masking it smoothly. Please don't re-open. 

Niko's face lit up, joking playfully, "There you guys are! I was beginning to wonder if you were coming." He paused, "Oh, Sero, this is Sei," He gestured to the black haired male, who waved at Sero, still holding onto Atsuo's arm.

Sero smiled at both of them, "Good to see you, Atsuo- and it's a pleasure to meet you, Sei." He nodded at Sei with an easygoing smile, "How was the drive over for you two?"

One of the things Niko envied about Sero was how easily he made conversation, and how easily he kept it. He kept the conversation between the four of them flowing effortlessly, keeping it light and friendly. 

Sero's hand ran along his spine, casually roaming his back like he owned it, fingers sending shivers all over Niko's body while he talked, carrying the conversation. Niko leaned on him, arms draped lazily around him, pleased to have the companionship.

His eyes darted in Aizawa's direction, and he blinked in surprise. He was glaring at them, his eyes barely visible in the dim light, but very clearly pointed in their direction, unblinking. Maybe it was the hickies all over Niko's neck, or the way he was so casually all over Sero, but Aizawa was staring. He must've noticed Niko looking at him, because he looked away again lips twisted into his signature scowl. 

Tugging on Sero's shirt, Niko gave him a playful, coy grin, tilting his head to the side, "Can you help me find the bathroom?"

Sero met his gaze skeptically, but he smiled right back, "No problem, Flare. C'mon." He tugged Niko away by a strap on his harness, Niko near-giggling as they walked down the hall, turning the corner and heading into one of the stalls. 

"You really needed help finding this?" Sero raised his eyebrows, and Niko batted him away with a flustered smile. 

"I just wanted to breathe a little. It was getting loud in there." Niko lied, and Sero squinted at him skeptically. "Okay, fine. I caught him looking at us. I wanted to make him jealous."

Sero snorted, "You really shouldn't pretend all for him. If he wants you, he needs to man the fuck up and get you."

Niko glanced away, sighing and leaning against the tiled wall. "I mean, look at you." Sero looked him up and down with an eye-roll, "I'm surprised he hasn't skinned me alive."

Niko shrugged, "I'm not that special. Just another pretty twink," a cocky smile wound up his lips, and he met Sero's gaze.

"Uhuh." Sero huffed, "Well, if you're not too distracted, I'd like to taste that pretty little twink."

Niko's mouth split into a devious expression, pulling Sero closer by the tie, "Never too distracted." He purred against Sero's lips, wrapping his arms around him and pulling his body flush against Niko's. 

Sero chuckled into the kiss, "Glad to hear it." His lips were warm, instantly escalating into rough kissing, teeth grazing Niko's lips with a heated lust. 

Another difference between him and Sero's 'relationship' and what he had with Aizawa -- he could feel the difference in the way they kissed. When it was Sero, it was pure lust, never for comfort, never tender. It was hot and messy and desperate. But with Aizawa, fuck, Niko could feel emotions, not just lust. 

He let Sero carry him away with the distraction, the heated kissing. Niko lost himself in it briefly, breathing growing ragged quickly, pulling away from Sero after a few minutes. "H-hold on, I don't wanna get too excited." He breathed, "Otherwise we're both gonna have to wait in here until I calm down."

The corners of Sero's mouth twitched up, and he nodded, "My bad. C'mon, lets get out of here."

His hand returned to the position on his waist, leading him out of the bathroom and back into the main area. Atsuo and Sei were still standing in the same place, and they took their places beside them. 

"Find the bathroom okay?" Atsuo's eyes flickered between the two of them, raising his eyebrows. Niko and Sero exchanged smiles and Sero nodded for him, hand squeezing his waist in a teasing manner. Atsuo changed the subject, lips quirking upwards, "Anyway, do you guys wanna dance?"

Niko met Sero's gaze, who's face had lit up at the idea. He raised his fingers to his lips, gnawing on the nail, "Uh, I don't dance very well, y'know-" He was abruptly cut off by Sero pulling him into the mass of students, sticking near the edge of it. Niko stiffened, hands landing on Sero's chest, eyes darting up to meet his. 

"Ease up, Niko," Sero chuckled, "Just sway, I'll guide you." 

Niko nodded, swallowing and letting Sero's steady hands guide him. He stuck close to him, feeling warmth radiating off of Sero's body. Sero's arms were looped loosely around Niko's waist, their bodies brushing slightly, "You're doing great." He assured as Niko met his gaze again, "Just relax."

Slowly, Niko's anxiety melted, focusing on just the two of them. If he ignored what others might be thinking of them, it was easier to relax into the repetitive movement. He kept his attention on the steady breathing of Sero, his breath occasionally brushing against Niko's face. The secure hold that Sero had on him was a reassuring one, doing wonders to ease him. 

He peered past Sero's shoulder, spotting Aizawa again, standing in the same spot. His eyes were glued to the pair. Now he clearly wasn't trying to hide the resentful glare, lips curved ever so slightly downwards, almost unblinking. An immoral sort of satisfaction warmed Niko's chest at the clear fixation that Aizawa had on him. It made him almost light-headed, adrenaline flushing through his body.

He tested his luck, leaning closer to Sero and murmuring in his ear, "He's watching."

He felt Sero laugh gently, the air ruffling his hair, "Say less. I can make this more fun." His hand rose to Niko's chin, pulling him into a heated kiss. Not making out, but long enough to rouse that familiar thirst of lust he knew oh so well. Sero drew back first, lips curving into a devilish grin, "Think he liked that one?"

Niko laughed, breathy and hot with blush, "Oh, totally." His eyes flitted briefly to Aizawa, who was still looking at them. Just before he began to look away, another familiar figure approached the professor. 

Silky black-blue hair, feminine figure, an easy air of casualty and confidence. It was the same woman from his apartment, taking her place beside Aizawa. The newcomer instantly drew Aizawa's attention, his lips moving as he spoke to her. Niko was instantly seized with uncontrollable jealous, his grip on Sero tightening. 

Sero looked down at him, brows creasing, "You okay? Do you want to take a break?"

Niko shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts, "Yeah, uh, sorry. I'm okay." His mouth widened into a weak smile, and Sero's movements stalled, eyebrows pulling together even further. 

"Are you sure?" He glanced over his shoulder, and Niko followed his gaze to where Aizawa was talking to the woman, no longer even glancing in his direction. "Ohh," Sero looked sympathetic, "Let's grab a drink, yeah? They probably have sparkling juice over there." He gestured to the other side of the room.

"No, really," Niko protested, but Sero was already leading him away, leaving him to trail after. It was probably his goal to get them out of eye-line, and in hindsight Niko figured that was better, but he couldn't help looking over his shoulder before they were completely out of sight, heart sinking. 

Sero led him around the corner of people dancing, to where they were handing out sparkling apple cider. He grabbed Niko by the shoulders, meeting his gaze, "Don't go anywhere, okay? I'll grab you some cider."

Niko nodded wordlessly, watching Sero grab two cups from Fukukado, and returning quickly, handing Niko the cup. Niko stared into the bubbling cup, sighing shakily under his breath. There was too much going on, mind foggy and on high alert. People talking, music that he didn't like, bodies moving and sweating. Aizawa and his little girlfriend. Maybe fuck-buddy? It was all too much. "Flare?" Niko looked up as Sero spoke. "Don't beat yourself up about it, okay?"

"He's been glaring daggers at me ever since I stepped inside, and if that doesn't say something, I don't know what does." He offered an optimistic smile, which raised Niko's spirit, if only a little. 

"Mhm, that's true." Niko swallowed the sour taste of resentment stinging his throat, steadying his breathing. HIs voice still came out weak, though. "Hey, can we go get some air?"

Sero nodded instantly, lacing his hand with Niko's and guiding him towards the door, "Let's get out of here."

Niko nodded, following him out through the side door. The air was substantially colder outside, door clicking shut behind them. The cold soaked into his clothes with a biting frost, Niko wrapping his arms around himself, breath clouding in the air. "God, it's cold outside," He noted with a brr sound.

"Winter, amirite?" There was a beat of silence, "Do you want to go to my car?"

Niko blinked, his eyes darting to Sero and then away, "Oh, um, I don't know.." Sex was definitely not in his cards right now. 

Sero tipping his chin upwards, voice soft, "That's not what I mean. I can run the heater so you can warm up. I don't want to do anything right now."

The tension in his shoulders eased, and Niko laughed nervously, "Uh, yeah, totally. I wasn't thinking anything else." Sero only raised his eyebrows with a chuckle, and they walked back to the parking lot, getting into Sero's car. 

Just as he was sitting down, his phone buzzed with a text. 

atsu >P<: you okay?? i cant find you :<
me: yeah, i just needed to get some fresh air. i don't like being in a crowded place too long
me: you know how i get
atsu >P<: no worries pookie :3 take care of yourself

Niko shut his phone off, breathing out a shaky sigh and relaxing as the car began to blow hot air out of the vents, effortlessly soothing the icy cold from outside. He put on some music, breathing slower and trying to calm himself down in the semi-quiet atmosphere. Sero must've realized that Niko was overwhelmed because he stayed silent, scrolling on his phone (mind you, with no volume) and allowing Niko space. 

After a few minutes, Niko piped up, "Can we go to your apartment?"

"Sure!" A smile capered across Sero's face, and he shifted into drive. 

They drove in silence - which was perfect to Niko. His music eased his overstimulation, looking out the window at the blurring city-scape. Pale lights illuminated the near-empty streets, catching on the frost-glazed vegetation along the sidewalks. 

To say Niko appreciated friendship would be an understatement. Obviously it wasn't the same as him and Atsuo, who'd known him for years, but Sero knew him well without him having to explain much. He was excellent picking up on Niko's body-language, and it was amazing to not have to defend himself or explain the way things were with him, or how he didn't do well in some social situations. He was a bit more mature than Atsuo and could give him well-thought advice from past experiences, and that was something Niko thoroughly valued.

When Sero pulled into his parking space, Niko had returned to a near-normal state. Of course, he was a bit quieter than normal, still thawing out, but he was more at ease. Sero pulled the key out and steered Niko into his apartment, handing him a change of clothes; a soft hoodie and a pair of fuzzy sweat-pants, and let him into the bathroom. 

Niko changed, glancing at himself in the mirror briefly. There were dark bags under his eyes, and the deep, thick crimson scars lining his upper arms made him shiver. Pulling on the sweater, he used the bathroom, sitting himself down in it for a few extra minutes. A pit had settled in his stomach, seeping through his body and infiltrating itself into his heart like a disease. Deep down, he knew it was the sight of Aizawa so easily distracted by someone else, someone Niko knew for a fact had been in his apartment so late at night, but for the moment, he allowed himself to believe it was the overstimulation, almost entirely trying to shove aside anything else. 

He texted Atsuo to let him know he wouldn't be coming back, and then exited the bathroom. Sero was sitting in his bed, leaning back against fluffy pillows with the checkered red and black pulled over his legs. He was on his phone, but his attention flashed to Niko as he came out. Niko crept in beside him, murmuring, "Thanks, Sero."

"No need to thank me, Niko," Sero assured him, "Do you want to watch a movie or something?" Niko's eyes shifted to look at the TV sitting on his dresser, across from the bed, and nodded. 

"Can you choose?" He skimmed from the TV to Sero, and then back to the TV. He felt Sero nod, and the screen flickered on, opening up a movie streamer. Sero chose a familiar movie, one that he must've remembered Niko talking about before. It wasn't anything all that action packed or scary, but instead a movie from Niko's childhood that he knew well. A comfort movie, of sorts. 

Niko was asleep within 15 minutes, shuffled comfortably under the warm blankets, black hair partially covering his face. He slept like a rock until the following morning, Sero waking him around noon. He left later that day to go to work.

Chapter Text

The week-long break was over mournfully quickly. He worked every day up until the Sunday before his fifth year officially started, so Niko was basically yearning for his day off. 

Whoever told Sosaki I was on break also deserves to work seven five and a half hour shifts in a week, Niko thought crossly to himself upon waking, looking at his schedule for the next week. It was back to normal - only closing shifts on Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. It was still a bit much but for money? Niko would do almost anything. 

He'd already planned what he wanted to do for the day. Nothing crazy, but after not really being able to get out much, he was just going to go out to the park near his old place. It had been ages since he'd actually gone, and now that he as comfortable going in that area and not being as fearful as running into his mother, he was excited to revisit it. 

Originally, Niko had planned to go with Atsuo, but he was working until 17:00, and Niko didn't want to be freezing while going out. He'd asked Sero next, but Sero was also working all day, so... He resolved to going alone. Not that it was horrible, but he would've enjoyed some company. 

Oboro had also left yesterday, leaving Niko and Hizashi to their usual routine. Dinners a few times a week, if they had the time, and random chatting when they ran into each other, or Hizashi was checking in on him. It was nice to be back to normal- not that Oboro was making him uncomfortable, Niko just didn't like a change in his routine. 

Around 14:00, he showered and got dressed. Nothing crazy, just something to keep him warm in the early spring air. It wasn't nearly as cold as it had been a couple weeks ago, but the highs still lingered around 10°C, and the wind could be quite piercing. He also put on his headphones, and set off. The drive was only twenty or so minutes, parking on the street along the sidewalk. 

He had his backpack slung over his shoulder so that he could tuck his riding jacket into it, leaving his helmet in the small storage space, before locking it and walking into the park. There were trees running along the stone-brick path, dead leaves littering the floor. The frost from last week had melted, and the grass was poking up again, just barely. Tiny green stalks poking up from the earth where the cold had been particularly harsh. The grass that had survived winter was cut neatly, wildflowers sprouting up near trees, uncut but neatly trimmed. 

Niko enjoyed the scenery, mostly. He had the tendency to look at the ground while he walked, especially when he was thinking, but his eyes flitted about frequently, drinking in the relaxed atmosphere. Occasionally, he'd pass people sitting on benches, or children playing games in the grass, but for the most part, it was fairly empty. It would be busier later into spring, through summer, and the warmer time in autumn. 

It was a popular area, considering it was residential and a large chunk of folk who lived in the area had families, children or dogs who enjoyed the park. Niko himself had spent a lot of his childhood at the park, though, without the presence of Sora. He'd been allowed out to do basically whatever he wanted, which was partially why he was so independent and reserved. It wasn't that Sora really "allowed" him out, but when he was younger, her abuse of alcohol was much worse. She would either be out working or drinking and hooking up with men Niko barely saw, aside from glimpses when they were walking around the house. Or stumbling up the porch steps so drunk that Niko would have to come up and help her.

And that was after she drove home. Miracle she didn't get herself killed.

He'd go out and just sit under the trees, picking at the grass or looking at the flowers. Sometimes, other kids would talk to him, but he didn't usually play with others. Occasionally the meaner, older kids would come up and stomp on his flower collection, but he was usually left alone. 

When he'd grown up a bit, he used the park as an escape from Sora's "wrath", sometimes sneaking out late at night to sit under the stars and listen to music. He would go alone, and sometimes with Atsuo, once he'd met him. 

As Niko walked, he hummed just under his breath, barely audible to anyone, even himself, only detected by the subtle vibration in his throat. His gaze was fixed to the walkway now, but he stalled his auto-piloted walking as he passed a lavender bush. Bees buzzed around it happily, avoiding him. There were only a few because most of the flowers were wilted, but there were a few that still bloomed vibrant violet petals, brown creeping along their stems, the icy claws reaching out as if the death was stalking the flowers until it could strike. 

He crouched beside the bush, fingers brushing over the flower delicately, carefully pulling it off by the stem. It wouldn't have mattered regardless, since it would've died before it was warm enough and rainy enough to save it. Straightening, Niko continued his walk, examining said flower. The petals were soft, blue-violet hue standing out stark against the environment around them. He could barely smell the fragrant scent, but it was nice nonetheless. He'd never been much of a flower guy, and he didn't really ever receive flowers, so he never bothered looking up what they meant, but he knew a bit about lavender flowers. 

They usually bloomed in little clusters around the park, particularly in late spring and summer. They were the most prominent in the park, and when they were in full bloom, they gave the area a soft, only just noticeable scent. Niko was familiar with them because of that, and honestly, he wasn't sure exactly where he got the information, but he knew that they were known for representing devotion. Among other things, of course- purity, silence, serenity... etc- but devotion stuck with him the hardest. His pattern of always chasing after others, instead of being pursued just as hard, was almost engrained in him. It was his "normal," even though he knew that it shouldn't have been like that. At least, not as consistent as it was. 

He was pulled from his thoughts for a fleeting moment as he approached a street, glancing up for a moment to check if it was clear, before stepping onto the crosswalk. He was only halfway across when a muffled but blaring horn scared the shit out of him, head snapping up.

A car was hurtling towards him at what had to be 80 kilometers an hour, far more than the speed limit, the lights flashing rapidly. Niko flinched, freezing at the sight, bracing himself for the impact. 

Something hit him hard, but not from the side. Behind, sending him hurtling backwards towards the sidewalk and then directly against something not quite as hard. No pain, no cracking of bones. Just the ache from falling so hard against whatever it was that had grabbed him. His eyes opened, blinking slowly, trying to process the fear. Adrenaline made his heart thunder in his ears, and he was barely able to comprehend how he was even standing.

Whipping around, words tumbled from his lips, "Oh my god, thank you so much-" Niko's eyes shot up to meet the other persons, mind drawing a blank on whatever he was planning on saying. Of course. 

In front of the tree they'd both fallen against, Aizawa was there. He was breathing hard, probably from running to grab him, a strand of hair fluttering in his face. 

"Are you alright?" His words were uniform, almost monotone, but his eyes skimmed up and down Niko, searching his gaze.

Two polar opposites instantly rammed against each other in his throat, one to be icily cold, and the other one to melt. Finally, his eyes averted, landing on the cup of spilled coffee just a few feet away. Heart caught in his throat, he stammered, "I-I'm fine."

"Fucking speeding idiot." Niko barely caught the words Aizawa muttered under his breath, his void-dark gaze following the path that the car had sped through. Niko looked in the same direction, still in shock from the close call.

Niko found his voice again, clearing his throat, "I should go." He avoided Aizawa's eyes, but he could see the curt nod. He turned left, towards the direction in which he parked his motorcycle, but to his utter dismay, Aizawa turned the same way, both halting abruptly. Right. His apartment is that way. 

"Whatever." Niko muttered, "Just walk." Aizawa took the invitation without a word. They walked in an unbearable silence, Niko staring at the pavement. His headphones rested loosely around his neck, feet tapping lightly on the ground. Neither of them spoke, seconds stretching into minutes. The silence was killing Niko, millions of thoughts swarming and assaulting his focused breathing. 

The most prominent of them was about Aizawa's love life. The woman he kept seeing, the woman Aizawa was around so frequently. 

He stopped in his tracks, his head raising to look at Aizawa. He'd stop just a pace late, whether on instinct or not, and was looking at Niko, his expression carefully calm. 

"What?" Aizawa's voice wasn't exactly rude but not all that friendly either. Somewhere in-between, dancing the thin line between care and the expectation to ask, as if Niko was a stranger. 

Niko couldn't stop the words from tumbling out, blurting, "So that's it? Didn't take you long to get over me, asshole." His words were cold, but the underlying hurt, the wound that they opened was so obvious he might as well have ripped his heart out and handed it right to Aizawa. 

The other man looked baffled, squinting at Niko like he'd just sprouted horns and a tail. He kept speaking, his voice cracking, "Is she that much easier to love?"

"She?" Aizawa repeated, his eyebrows knitting together, "Who the fuck told you I have a girlfriend?"

Niko just stared at him hopelessly, mute, his heart worn on his sleeve. Aizawa looked at him a moment longer, shaking his head as he glanced away, hand coming up to brush a piece of hair from his face, "For gods sake, Nikolaus, I'm not even into women. And it's none of your business what my love-life is like." 

The instant relief that ricocheted through Niko was simultaneously disgusting and alleviating. Scarlet burst in Niko's cheeks, and he looked away. "Oh." Was the only thing he could say, embarrassment burning like a wildfire in his face. He kept walking, Aizawa keeping pace. A few beats of silence passed, and Niko looked at the street, mumbling, "Sorry."

Aizawa snorted in response, but didn't speak. Niko could imagine the disbelieving shake of his head, the amusement that flashed through the voids that claimed his eyes. "Nemuri?" Aizawa's words were hardly a question, "Not that it's your place to poke in, but I would never go anywhere near her if it wasn't for her persistence."

Niko scoffed, unable to keep bitterness from clawing it's way out of his throat, "Really? Is that why she was in your apartment?" He only realized what he'd said a second after he snapped it back, fighting the urge to slam his face into his hands at his insane fuck-up. Fucking kill me now, oh my god.

"Stalker much." Aizawa grumbled, falling silent. Niko was burning up like he had a fever, refusing to look anywhere near the older man. "She was buying a painting off of me." His words sounded almost like an admission, as Aizawa hadn't really wanted to say them. 

"Ah." Niko almost started laughing hysterically as his own stupidity, but he fought it off, an impulsive grin twitching at his lips. This means nothing. He tried to convince himself of that, but the pure adrenaline from just.. being close to him, it drove him nuts. No arguing, no sharp words. Just them. Just walking.

"What classes are you taking?" Aizawa spoke first, his voice low. It had no emotion to it, but the question was enough to make Niko's lips smugly curve up ever so slightly before he snuffed out the beginnings of the smile. 

Niko rolled his eyes to himself, still looking at the ground, "You already know most of the answer to that."

"Smartass." Aizawa huffed, and then after a second, rephrased, "What other classes are you taking?"

The nickname instantly flashed through his mind akin to "pain in my ass", but he didn't comment on it, "Political History, Japanese and Multimedia. Second semester my elective is Graphic Design." Niko explained quietly, giving him a tentative glance. Their gazes met briefly, and then Niko looked away again, examining the path they walked on.

He didn't really respond to that much, aside from a quiet noise of acknowledgement, but Niko couldn't help himself from holding the conversation, "What're you doing here?"

"I was on my way back from getting coffee. Thought a walk through here would be nice." He answered, noting wryly, "I'm glad I did."

Niko let out a breathy laugh, "Yeah, likewise. I didn't plan on, y'know, dying today. Sorry about your coffee. Uh, I guess." His pathetic attempt at being casual was very obviously falling from his fingers, only serving to warm his face further. 

The dark-haired man chuckled, Niko shivering as the low rumble sent tremors through his fingertips. "It's fine. I can't say it was in my plans to save you either."

"Thank you." Niko's words sounded more like a tentative admission rather than genuine gratitude. It felt both wrong and so right to be talking casually like this, and it was tearing him into two clashing parts. 

"Don't mention it." Aizawa responded curtly, "I would've done it for anyone."

"Dropped your precious coffee?" Niko shot back, mouth splitting into a sardonic grin as he caught Aizawa's eyes, "Yeah, right."

He looked briefly offended, eyes narrowing, before he looked away with a small shake of his head, "You're such a pain."

Niko's heart leapt to his throat, thrumming in his eardrums like music. "I've heard that one before," He pointed out dryly, "I'm sure it's equally as false now."

Aizawa took in a breath to respond, but for a moment, nothing came, and he released it slowly. Got you with that one, hm? Niko stifled a chuckle, his breath still stuttering in his lungs as if there were hands squeezing them, teasing a full breath before holding them a little tighter. 

They passed Niko's bike, and Aizawa's movements stalled, "Isn't that yours?"

Niko glanced at it, biting his tongue. "Uh, yeah."

"Isn't that where you're stopping?"

Niko's eyes returned to Aizawa hesitantly, voice failing him. Their eyes locked for a few agonizing seconds, and then Aizawa gave a shrug, "Whatever. I didn't see it if you didn't." He turned and kept walking. Niko followed suit, a breath of relief escaping him. He kept up, shoulder to shoulder with the other man. 

"You forgot your things at my place, by the way." Aizawa's voice was carefully measured, "I can bring them you tomorrow."

"Okay," Niko agreed, eyebrows knitting together, "What did I forget?"

Aizawa hesitated, "One of your shirts. I was going to wash it, but I believe it's been sitting in the same place since you left." Something about his tone seemed off, but Niko tried not to dwell on it.

"Great," A warm smile ghosted across Niko's lips, "Hopefully it's not covered in Juno's fur."

"It's not." Aizawa's response came a little too quickly to be a guess, and Niko looked up at him, raising his eyebrows. Aizawa looked away, "I think."

"Uhuh." He rolled his eyes, gaze falling away, "You think."

Aizawa walked them across a street, now only a few minutes from his apartment. Niko fought off the shameful disappointment that was icing over his body, adding slowly, "How is Juno?"

"He's good." Warmth seeped into Aizawa's words, "He's been sleeping in your-" He cut himself off abruptly, and Niko looked up, he looked almost surprised at himself, correcting, "He's been sleeping on my pillows. It can get annoying."

Niko didn't poke at it, instead shrugging, "He probably just wants company. He probably loved having- ah, what did you say her name was?"

Aizawa scoffed, "Nemuri. And no, he didn't even show his face. She probably doesn't know I have a cat."

"He was social with me," Niko pointed out, "Did she scare him, or something?"

There was a beat of silence, and Niko found himself grasping at straws. Is there something I'm missing? Or, something he's hiding? Eventually, Aizawa confessed, "Yes, he did like you. If you remember, I was surprised by that. He's usually less excited to meet people. Shy, if you will."

"Oh, right. I completely forgot," Niko nodded. His shoulder brushed Aizawa's and he could've sworn it sparked, electric volts running down his arm and making his fingers twitch. Maybe it was the sting of unhealed scars. It won't become a habit. Only twice. Two nights ago, but it meant nothing. He'd throw away the blade tonight. His pulse skittered, breath faltering. It was too much for him, adrenaline still rushing through him like a riptide, churning up all that he'd grown familiar with and sending it crumbling again jagged rocks. 

He looked up instinctively, almost not wanting to meet the other man's gaze, but finding him already looking. Niko turned away almost immediately, but the image of it burned into his mind. Not the same eyes he used to give him, but not quite as cold as it was in class. He sure as fuck wouldn't forget the look that Aizawa had given him time and time again, the ones with that carnal desire, the near-feral hunger for him. 

"So," His voice was flat again, "I see you found yourself a pretty boyfriend."

Oh fuck. "Uh.." Niko trailed off into an awkward silence, laughing nervously. He couldn't even begin to explain what he was doing with Sero because it was purely for sex and to make Aizawa jealous.

"It's fine. It's not my business. Just something I... noticed. You two were quite showy at the ball." His words were biting, curt and clipped. He could hear the change in Aizawa's tone, the glimpse of his jaw tightening. Jealousy. Of course. And yet, he still couldn't bring himself to explain, still closed off from him. A learned behavior, he supposed. 

When they got to the apartment only a few minutes later, they stood awkwardly outside for a moment. Aizawa was the first to speak, "Drive safe. I'll see you in class, Kasai."

Kasai. Niko's eyes narrowed, and he caught Aizawa's gaze, giving him a short nod before he turned around. The feeling of irritation bubbled up in him, though he knew he was... technically the one that was pushing him away. He walked back to his motorcycle, headphones returning to blare music in his ears, focusing on it (and the street crossings) and pushing away the turmoil that pulled his insides into constricting knots. 

When he'd put on his jacket and helmet, and put his headphones away, he turned on his bike, shifting into first and driving down the road he'd taken on the way there. It was a mostly familiar path, taking the highway down to the Hizashi's house and exiting, following residential streets until he pulled into the driveway. 

Walking inside, he found Hizashi standing in the kitchen, his sleeves rolled up, a checkered red and white apron tied around his waist. He peered over his shoulder as Niko took off his boots, beaming at him, "Niko! I was just about to ask you if you wanted any of this sukiyaki, it'll be done in an hour or so."

Niko slid off his jacket, hanging it and making for the kitchen, stopping beside him. He had just begun to cut up vegetables for preparation, but his stomach rumbled in anticipation, and he nodded with a small smile. 

Hizashi looked him up and down, raising his eyebrows, "Did something happen? You seem more relaxed than normal." His tone was teasing, "Was it Sero?"

Niko's face bloomed crimson instantly. "What?? No, nothing happened," He protested, waving off Hizashi's playful grin and looking away, smothering the urge to grin, "I just feel better today."

Hizashi raised his hands, "Ooookay mister, whatever you say." Niko bit back the urge to laugh nervously, leaning back against the counter as Hizashi continued, "Whatever it is, I'm glad you're feeling better. It just looks like you're lighter."

"Lighter?" Niko raised his eyebrows skeptically, and Hizashi laughed to himself, shaking his head. He didn't respond immediately, musing for a moment as he chopped the food, Niko's eyes still fixed to him curiously.

"Like... You're more yourself. You don't seem as tired as you have been." Hizashi said, changing the subject, "What've you been up to on your day off?"

Niko hummed, letting it go and shrugging, "..Nothing crazy. I went to the park and walked around for a bit, and," His words stalled, and he cleared his throat, "Not much else." Hizashi gave him, head tilting ever so slightly, but he didn't push, much to Niko's relief. He was not running anyones arms. No matter who.

"I'm glad you got some fresh air. You're going back to your regular work schedule next week, no? That should take some weight off of your chest," Hizashi noted, chuckling softly. Niko nodded. He was looking forward to working less. It wasn't that he hated his job, but working every day for so long and having to deal with picky customers got on his nerves pretty quickly.

Hizashi finished dinner not too long later, and they ate at the table, before they went to their respective rooms and Niko spent some time sketching in his journal. Notedly, not throwing away what he had promised earlier. 

Chapter Text

Fifth year started. Finally. Niko wasn't necessarily looking forward to completing another whole year at this godforsaken school, but the consistent, pressing thought of, just one more year. and then I'm free, chanted on in his mind as motivation.

His schedule wasn't crazy busy, but he didn't have a free block like he did in the second semester of fourth year. On the plus side, though; him and Atsuo were taking almost all of the same classes, so they had the same schedule. Their first was Japanese.

Yagi was teaching it this year, a scrawny, older man with scarily-blue eyes. He spoke with a slight rasp, but Niko liked him. He was kind, and he was a good teacher. And he accepted late work.

Niko sat down beside Atsuo, shimming into his seat. "You're late." Atsuo gave him a pointed stare, "For the first day of class.." He tsked, bumping their shoulders, fuck, yowch, "I missed you."

He rolled his eyes in return, expression dissolving into warmth, "I missed you too, Atsuo." He glanced at the front of the classroom, where Yagi stood, clearly preparing to start talking. Niko made shushing motion to Atsuo, who had just opened his mouth, tipping his head towards the front of the class. Atsuo only closed his mouth, snorting, and turned his attention ahead.

"Good Morning, students." He started, "It's my pleasure to introduce you to your first day as fifth years. I hope you're all starting to plan out what you may do after graduating." Yagi cleared his throat, glancing at the white-board, "Anyway... We won't be doing anything but introductory assignments this morning, but the first half of class will be me explaining what our main assignments are."

He began to hand out packets as he spoke, "This will be your syllabus. Should you lose it, you can email me and I'll print out a new one for you the next time you come in. You will note that on the first page, it says that I accept late work." He paused, his glacial blue gaze skimming over the class, "That is only applicable for smaller assignments. Essays, tests and other such work must be turned in day of, or you will receive a zero."

Niko scanned over his packet as he was handed one, listening and reading along with what Yagi was saying. "We will have four major essays throughout the year, two in this semester and two in the next. They're each 25% of your final grade, however, if you cannot pass my final, you will receive a D, at the highest."

He continued droning on, and Niko examined the work. It was more of the same from his previous years, honestly. Of course, the essays were graded more strictly, and had higher word-counts, but from what he could see, these were already things that he'd been doing for years. Yagi worked his way through the syllabus, going over everything, before he allowed them to complete an introductory assignment by themselves. Nothing huge, just a small written piece that Niko assumed would introduce him to their writing skills.

Japanese ended around 09:30, and him and Atsuo headed to Political History. Similarly to Japanese, most of the period was taken up by lecturing about what the class would entail. Sakamata was teaching it again, much to their surprise. Apparently they'd fired the old history teacher, so Sakamata had taken their place. This wasn't an awful development, but Sakamata was far stricter than any of his other professors, aside from perhaps Aizawa.

And eventually, after lunch, Niko made his way to general art. Taught by Aizawa, obviously. Niko sat in his usual spot; the same one he'd sat in for the past however many years, Atsuo taking his place beside him. Unlike last year, he had no clue what would be taking place in this class. He'd never taken fifth year art before (..obviously), but he was sure he'd manage just fine. Art was his strong suit and he knew how Aizawa liked to grade, due to having him for so many years.

"Wonder what we're learning this year." Atsuo commented idly, pulling out a notebook. Niko shrugged, glancing at the desk that occupied the corner of the room, where Aizawa sat. He wasn't looking at anyone, writing in a black notebook.

"Nik?" Niko's eyes averted, landing on Atsuo, "You think you're gonna be okay?"

Atsuo was looking at him, playing with the strings on his hoodie nervously. Niko poked him playfully, "What, you think I can't handle a little apprehension? I'll be fine. If anything, I'm more worried about Sakamata's class." He pointed out, adding with a wry smile, "He's so stiff."

Atsuo's mouth split into a grin and he chuckled, nodding, "I swear someone shoved a stick right up his ass and glued it in there." They both dissolved into laughter, though Niko's was notably more forced than Atsuo's, and Atsuo cleared his throat, tinted red as he fought off giggles, "Though the same could be said about him," he jerked his head in Aizawa's direction, and Niko snorted.

"Tell me about it," He chuckled, flashing another lingering glance in the professors direction. Aizawa's gaze caught his momentarily, but no emotion flickered through his dark eyes, and he only stood up, indicating the start of class.

Aizawa cleared his throat, pacing to his desk and leaning back against it, arms crossed over his chest. His face was set in that familiar expression, speaking coldly, "Good afternoon fifth years, and welcome to general art." He paused, eyes scouring over the students, "Those of you who have had my class before will know that I do not accept late work, revisions on large assignments, or any sort of grade bargaining."

"Each project you turn in will be graded without regard to who you are or what you may have trouble with, per usual art standards." Niko caught Atsuo's gaze, rolling his eyes at Aizawa's dramatic speech. Probably meant to scare them, and by the looks on others' faces, it was working. "The only exception for revisions will be for minor assignments, and the revisions will be completed in class. You will only get one chance. Whatever grade you get on said revision will be kept, regardless of if it's better or worse."

"Moving on," Aizawa moved to stand in front of a whiteboard. In his neat handwriting, there was a list of subjects and specific studies, "This is what we are studying this semester. I will be handing out a syllabus shortly- or, rather, I will have one of you hand it out to save me the effort." His finger raised to point at the top one, "We'll be exploring various art media and foundational understanding of both art history and theory."

He paused, gaze flicking to Niko briefly, and then to the seat beside him, "Kurosaki. Hand out the syllabi on my desk."

Niko snorted, muttering a dry, "Of course," under his breath before exchanging glances with a surprised Atsuo. Shrugging, Atsuo got out of his seat and grabbed the packets, starting to hand them out as Aizawa continued.

"You will find in the packet all of the resources we'll be going over will be online. Even if you can't make it into class, you are expected to complete all assignments and hand them in the following day." Niko skimmed over the packet as Atsuo handed him one, trying to stop his eyes from frequenting Aizawa's frame. Irritation at the lack of control he held over himself made it hard to focus entirely on the syllabus.

Unfortunately, he couldn't tune out Aizawa's words like before. If anything, he was all but hanging on them. Each syllable poured right into his mind, bathing on his tongue like he was the one saying them. Atsuo had sat back down next to him, and Niko could feel his gaze every once and awhile, but if he was worried, he didn't say anything.

Once they'd finished going over the syllabus, Niko leaned back in his seat, eyes locking with Aizawa. There was a beat of tension that split the air between them, and then Niko looked away, scoffing. If felt empty, though. Perhaps the flame of anger had snuffed out. Perhaps it just needs to be re-ignited.

Niko did is absolute hardest to stock the fire that Aizawa usually kept alive all by himself. He was relentless, though. He still muttered out those same snide remarks, scornful glances tossed in Aizawa's direction, most of which he caught with his own apathetic eyes.

"Did something happen over break?"

Atsuo's words made his pen stall on the paper that Niko was writing on, his eyes flashing to the calico-haired man. "What?" He asked, false disbelief seeping into his words, eyebrows knitting together.

"You seem a lot less angry at the world." Atsuo pointed out with a shrug, head tipping as he teased, "Did something happen with Sero?"

Niko whined, looking away with a huff, "Oh, shut up. Nothing happened with Sero. I'm the same as I was before break."

Atsuo leaned closer, whispering conspiratorially, "Your secret is safe with me." His lips were curved into a playful, grin, and he made a zipping motion over them.

Niko leaned back, running a hand through soft black locks, exhaustion making his patience thin, "There is no secret, Atsuo."

Atsuo only shrugged, casting a grin in his direction, "Well, somethin' happened, Nik. I'm just glad to see you're feeling a little better." He leaned closer, resting his chin on Niko's shoulder with a more genuine, "I was worried about you, mister."

"Oookay, mister," Niko shot back, amused by his friends fondness, ruffling his hair to mess with him. Atsuo leaned away with a coltish scowl, fixing his curly hair quickly.

Despite their closeness, Niko was reluctant to tell Atsuo what happened. It wasn't that he didn't trust him, he just felt awkward, maybe a bit ashamed, of how much he still wasn't willing to let Aizawa go. If nothing else, the contact he'd had with him the previous day only showed that Niko would tolerate and enjoy his company, whether he liked that fact or not.

He was equally as reluctant to tell him about how exhausted he'd been from work, and now that school was starting, Niko knew damn well it'd only get worse. 

It was just about the end of class when Niko finally piped up about it, breathing in to speak. The words died in his throat though, unsure how to even say it. Atsuo narrowed his brows, "What?"

Niko blinked, and Atsuo rolled his eyes, "C'mon, Niko, I've known you for years. I know when you're about to say something. Tell me," He prompted with a warm smile.

Niko sighed, bracing himself, "Okay, uh," He hesitated, and then cleared his throat, "Look, yesterday- Ugh, fuck, can we go to a study room?"

Atsuo nodded, scooping up his bag and leading the way out. Aizawa didn't say anything about it, much to Niko's relief. They went into one of the open study rooms in the commons, shutting the door. "So, what's up?" Atsuo sat down at the round table. Niko did the same, pulling his feet up onto the chair for his own comfort.

"So, uh, yesterday. I was at the park near my old house, and I ran into Aizawa. Or- he grabbed me. Out of the way of a car." Niko clarified, flushing bright crimson. Atsuo's eyebrows shot up, but he remained silent, and Niko continued, "I started to leave, but we ended up walking in the same direction, and I might've blown up about him having a girlfriend, which turns out wasn't his girlfriend, cuz he's gay, and-" He took another breath, all the words coming out at once, "And we passed my motorcycle and I ended up walking him all the way home and we talked and- fuck, Atsuo, I don't know what to do, I'm just- I just can't-"

"Woah, Niko, breathe," Atsuo pulled him from his chair, wrapping his arms around the shaky man, "It's okay. Just relax, it's okay." He promised, pulling him back. Niko sat down, looking down at his hands and messing with his nails.

"I just don't know what to do." He repeatedly softly. Atsuo was quiet for a moment, before speaking comfortingly.

"Niko it's okay, you don't have to know what to do right now. It's... It's hard, I know." Atsuo's words were faltering, but they grew steadier as he continued, "I know you're having trouble getting over him but it seems like you're not doing as much as you're hoping. I know you want to keep taking his class, but if you really want to get over him, you can't. It's not great to hear, but- Look at me, Niko." He tipped Niko's chin upwards, eyebrows creasing in concern, "Please drop his class. You can transfer to the same one from our other teacher, just.. It's not good for you. I can see it."

"It's not that bad," Niko protested weakly, lying through his teeth, "It's not.. It's not like I'm depressed because of it." Not solely, at least, "I just want him back. So fucking bad. I miss him, Atsuo. I miss the way he says my name, the way he looks at me. I miss the way he'd comfort me, how he'd always fall asleep with one arm around me and I'd wake up still in his arms." His voice cracked, glancing out the window in the room as if Aizawa would be there.

"I know, Nik." Atsuo's voice was sympathetic, "I've been there." He stalled, but added, "I just want you to feel better. How you do that is up to you and him. If you want to try again, you can do that, but know that if he's not willing to work with you, that's not your problem. It's not all on you."

Niko nodded, still looking out the window. He didn't say anything else, silenced by the desperate yearn he'd come to know oh so well.

He went to work numb that day. His shift passed in a blur, working with Sero, who kept attempting to chat, though Niko barely responded. Sero noticed something was up, but he didn't ask until they were closing, clearly concerned.

"Look you don't have to tell me but Niko, if there's anything I can do to help or distract you, let me know." Sero offered with a warm smile, trying and failing to catch his gaze.

Niko nodded, keeping his eyes carefully averted as he responded, "Thank you. It's nothing crazy, I'll be fine in the morning, it's just.. complicated." Sero tipped his head to the side curiously, searching Niko's gaze. He kept it away, swallowing the swarming anxiety.

"I won't push. Do you want to spend the night? We can watch some movies on my tv, or play games? I'll make us dinner." Sero asked. Niko hesitated, contemplating. It would be nice to not have to think about it all alone.

Eventually, he nodded, a weak, but genuine, smile curling at his lips, "Yeah, that'd be nice."

Sero drove them both to his apartment, leading Niko upstairs and giving him a hoodie and sweats to change into. His apartment was cold, but once they were both changed into more comfortable clothing, and they were in the kitchen, Niko managed to warm up a bit. Sero started some ramen for the both of them, leaning against the counter to face Niko. 

"What do you want to watch?" He asked, tilting his head slightly. 

"Oh, um..." Niko trailed off uncertainly, wracking his brain for any sort of ideas, "Maybe... we could watch another easygoing movie? Have you seen Spirited Away?"

Sero's face lit up, teasing, "Duh! Who do you think I am?" 

But once they were both in the bed, after eating, they warmed up pretty quickly. Sero threw on a movie that Niko had mentioned, letting Niko rest on him.

He ended up with his head on Sero's chest, one leg resting across Sero's. It was comfortable, and he enjoyed the casual intimacy. He'd never had a friend where he could just be touchy with, as Atsuo had been in a relationship with Sei ever since they'd met. Sero was obviously a different case, but it was mutually benefiting both of them and Niko was more than grateful to have that type of relationship— at least right now.

The movie they were watching was entertaining, and Niko found himself more at ease, comfortable in the warmth that Sero provided. He was already drowsy as the clock neared 22:00, eyelids heavy.

"I feel better." Niko murmured, yawning, "Thanks, Sero."

"Anytime, Flare. I'm glad I could help." He could hear Sero's smile, and but could only nod blearily in response, adjusting himself, muscles relaxing. Their breathing was near-synchronized, though as Niko's breaths became deeper and deeper, they fell out of sync. He could only just hear the clicking of a controller, but couldn't bring himself to so much as open his eyes to see what Sero was playing. 

It wasn't long after that when he fell asleep, slipping into hauntingly vivid dreams.

Chapter Text

Tuesday came and went, and by Wednesday, Niko was... almost at ease. 

Not exactly happy, per se, but not upset. Or at least, not upset as he had been in the past few months. Well...

While Niko had promised himself that his self harm wouldn't become a reoccurring thing, it was such an easy way to get release that it had become semi-frequent. He knew it was self destructive, but he couldn't help it. It wouldn't be long lasting, and it was temporary. It would only be a couple of months, and if he couldn't stop after that, he would tell someone. If not sooner.

He'd been careful with Sero to keep his shirt on, and to wear t-shirts and long sleeves to cover his upper arms, but it was getting harder. He couldn't keep lying to everyone, especially Atsuo. Sero would find out sooner or later if he wasn't careful. 

It was the same as all those years ago when he couldn't handle being around Sora. Well, it wasn't as bad, because he was being careful to confine it to just his upper arms, but still. At least he wasn't at risk of bleeding out, right?

Walking into general art, Niko found himself early. He didn't really think about it as he walked in, but when he looked up to an empty classroom, and a rather exhausted Aizawa looking up in suspicion, he blinked. Their eyes locked, and he froze, feet stalling clumsily. He tripped over himself, barely catching himself as he was flooded with warmth. 

Aizawa stared at him, his mask perfectly maintained, suspicion gone. "Kasai. You're early." He noted coldly, speaking to Niko as if he were anyone else. Niko glanced away, shrugging silently. He sat down in his seat wordlessly, exhaustion weighing him down. His fingers strayed to run across the much older scars on his wrist, dipping below his sweater. 

"Did you need something?" Aizawa's voice carried across the classroom, and Niko glanced up. He could barely form the thoughts in his mind, and he shrugged again. 

"Does it look like I need something?" He shot back, voice flat and icy. Silence followed, and he pulled out his sketchbook, doodling idly. Obviously, Aizawa didn't speak again after that, and they sat in a tense silence for a few more minutes, until others began to filter inside. He was still more than pissed at Aizawa, but he didn't have the energy for the angry comments, the immature jabs. Aizawa hadn't been retorting much either, probably mirroring what Niko was doing. 

Atsuo sat down next to him once everyone was inside, catching his gaze. His eyebrows knit together, clearly noticing his disheveled appearance. "Are you okay?" His voice was soft, hand reaching out to touch Niko's shoulder. He flinched, instantly realizing his mistake, eyes locking with Atsuo's. The calico-haired male's eyes narrowed slightly, but he didn't say anything, and Niko was quick to break the silence. Maybe too quick. 

"I'm just tired." Please, don't let him ask. Fear made his movements stiff and spastic, jerking his attention back to his sketching, awkwardly changing the subject, "How're you doin' this morning, Atsu?" It was very obviously forced and deliberate, but Atsuo didn't push. His gaze lingered for a few moments longer, burning into him, but when Niko didn't say anything, he simply leaned back and sighed wearily. 

"I'm okay." Atsuo paused, "Well, I'm doing pretty good, actually, I'm just worn out from work. I had a six hour shift last night- all the way to closing." He groaned, running a hand through his hair as he remarked, "And I didn't fall asleep 'till, like, 3." 

Niko snorted, shutting his notebook and leaning into the casual banter, forcing a friendly mask, "Yikes. Yeah, I haven't been sleeping great either." He glanced away before adding wryly, "Too much pent up tension. I need to start seeing Sero more often."

Atsuo wrinkled his nose, poking him in the chest playfully, "Aw, ew, Niko, I didn't need to hear that!" He dissolved into a laugh, "But yeah, maybe you should. I noticed you've gotten a little more... I dunno, low energy? Have you been feeling alright, Nik?"

Niko shrugged. "I've been kind of off lately." He hesitated, but Atsuo's probing gaze prompted him to continue, admitting, "And.. yeah, I've been more depressed."

Atsuo's eyes softened, "I know. You're my best friend, Nik, I know you. I'm here for you if you want to talk. It's not healthy to keep it all in, y'know? I don't want to push you if you're not ready, but I'm all ears. Whenever you want, wherever you want. I just want you to feel better, man."

Niko nodded, throat tightening as he swallowed back tears, "Yeah, I know." He drew in another breath, words dying to leave him, but he exhaled it after a moment. I can't tell him. Not yet. "Anyway, how's work been aside from the awful shift last night?" He turned his attention towards Atsuo, shifting in his seat, but before the other man could respond, Aizawa's voice rang out, silencing the class quickly- Niko and Atsuo included. 

"Today's lesson will be mainly reading. I expect you all to take notes as you read, and there will be an assignment at the end of class to show what you've learned." His gaze skipped over Niko entirely, and once again, his gut twisted into knots. Familiar. He glared at the dark haired man, a scowl adorning his lips. Infuriating mother-fucker. 

In better news, he'd been reflecting more on Sero's words about painting. Aside from the relapsing and the recurring depression, he hadn't been that awful. It only got really bad when he was rotting alone in a dark room, bed cold and empty. 

He'd been painting more outside of school, though. Smaller canvases, mainly, only one sat in his room with no real place to go. Hizashi had been pleased to see him reclaiming his hobby, but Niko had always been modest about his painting. It wasn't perfect, and he was a nit-picker (similarly to Aizawa), so they never looked good enough to him, but it was still a good way to get out emotion. Not the same as his other coping habits, but enough to hold him over until it really got to him. 

He preferred to paint landscapes, with oil paint-- which had quickly grown on him after taking Aizawa's class. That being said, he'd been focusing on detaching it from the older man, and it got easier with every paint stroke, thank the gods. 

Speaking of, the class went by slowly. Their reading was on art history, and it was actually rather interesting, Niko writing attentively as he read through the pages, focused nearly solely on the work at hand. Sure, he did occasionally glance up to look at Aizawa, who never returned his gaze, but he was almost entirely absorbed in the material. 

True to his word, Aizawa handed out an assignment halfway through class, and Niko had no problem answering the questions. Despite his exhaustion, he poured his energy into reading the text and answering accurately - which wasn't hard after he read it. 

Despite the exhaustion, Niko didn't want his mental health to effect his grades nor his work. He'd always been a perfectionist and that didn't change when he was depressed, not even if it overworked him to the point of self-sabotage. 

The day went by at a snails pace, and he could barely finish his lunch with Atsuo because of his nauseatingly tired state. Atsuo was clearly concerned, but when he had asked if Niko was okay, he'd had only shrugged. He knew he wasn't doing great at hiding it, but it was too easy to lose himself in the depression, especially at school. Atsuo hadn't pushed again. 

After class, he went straight home, going up to his room after a brief greeting to Hizashi. He'd been making food, but Niko was so focused on finishing everything that he needed to that he couldn't spare a moment to think about eating.

Sitting down on his bed, he yawned, stretching his arms above his head and falling flat onto his back, fluffy blanket deflating beneath him. His gaze lingered on the slanted ceiling, running across the deep wooden beams. Niko's fingers rose to his lips, chewing idly on his pinky nail, trying to sort out a schedule for the rest of the night. 

He resigned to his desk shortly after, doing the small amount of homework for his classes, before heading into the bathroom, and turning on the shower to try and clean off the gross feeling from school.

The water got hot quickly, steaming up the bathroom, and he stripped off his clothing, slipping behind the foggy glass door. He slid it shut, letting the blissfully warm liquid pour over him, soothing his sore muscles. It stung the deep garnet slits in his arms, but it was a sting he'd become familiar with, and barely noticed at this point. It was becoming a little too regular to be healthy. 

His hair was soaked within seconds, squeezing his shampoo into his hand and scrubbing it into his scalp until his head was covered in the foamy soap, lingering out of the stream of water for a few moments longer before washing it out. He repeated the process with conditioner, before he washed his face and body, scrubbing himself everywhere but his upper arms.

After he'd gotten out and dried himself off, he sat down at the stool in the corner of his room, sitting in front of a partially finished painting. It was of the view from his window. Since it was March now, the snow had subsided, and just night frost clung to the growth outside. It was warm enough during the day to melt away the icy grip, and green was beginning to sprout from the earth, marking the beginning of spring. 

Aizawa's old hoodie still sat in his room, wedged into the space between the wall and his bed, the clothing that the older man returned sitting folded neatly on his dresser. Niko hadn't even put it away yet. 

He dipped into his paints, focusing his attention onto the canvas, shoving away any other thoughts in his mind. He was entirely engrossed in his work when Hizashi knocked, and he looked up in surprise. 

"Come in!" He called, eyes fixed to the door as the blond man stepped inside, looking briefly at the painting before turning to look at Niko. 

"Hey, Niko!" He walked over, ruffling his hair with a warm smile, "I was just wondering if you had dinner. I didn't hear you make anything." 

Niko shook his head, almost guilty, "No, sorry. I headed right upstairs, I'm pretty worn out." He glanced at his unfinished painting anxiety trickling into his gut. 

"No, no that's alright kid," Hizashi waved him off, "I just want to make sure you're eating alright. Do you want me to make you something?"

Niko shrugged, "If you want to? Ramen sounds pretty good right now."

Hizashi beamed at him, "Yeah, of course!" He glanced at the painting again, scanning it. "This is really beautiful, Niko. I noticed you've been painting more," He gestured to the other canvas or two sitting beside his desk, "Have you ever thought about putting them up for an art show?"

Niko blinked in surprise. "Uh, no, actually," He admitted, "I don't really think they're good enough for that, but I'm glad you think that." He chuckled, waving off the words lightly and setting down his paint brush. He didn't really want to be criticized for his work, much less by people he didn't even know. 

Hizashi caught his gaze, shaking his head, "No, seriously, Niko. I'd love to have them up in my gallery, if you're comfortable with it. They're gorgeous. You wouldn't have to pay anything, don't worry. I just want to get your name out there."

Niko hesitated, shrugging. Hizashi continued though, encouraging him, "You have some real talent, Niko. Especially for a 20 year old, you're spectacular. You have a really good chance of selling your art one day, if you get more known in the art community. Or you could even become an artist for a good company, if you want something a little less well-known."

The words surprised Niko, striking him right in the gut. He looked up, locking eyes with Hizashi, "You think so?" 

He'd never really thought he was that good. Sure, good enough to pass a couple art classes with flying colors, but a career selling his art? That wasn't an easy feat, and for Hizashi to think he really could was a huge compliment. 

"I really do." Hizashi promised, adding softly, "Just think about it, okay? I'll save a spot just for you, if you ever decide that you want to. Just get back to me, yeah?"

Niko nodded, a genuine smile splitting his lips, "Okay, yeah. I can do that. I'll think about it."

"Awesome!" Hizashi beamed again, "I'll go get that ramen started for ya." He gave a quick goodbye to Niko before exiting the room leaving Niko in silence. 

His words struck Niko hard. I mean, getting into the art industry is really hard. Making enough money? You have to be a real show stopper, y'know? He looked at the unfinished painting before him, trying to see what Hizashi saw. It was good, yeah. A lot better than everyone else in his class, but it was nothing like Aizawa's level of skill. 

Still, the idea wasn't a bad one. He set his task aside and sat down in his bed, pulling out his computer. If he couldn't make money from selling art, which he really doubted people would pay a lot for, he could get into the art industry for a company. He wasn't bad at digital art, and if honed in on that skill a little more, maybe he could be a designer for a well-paying company. 

It didn't take a lot of work to find companies that would pay good money for a professional artist. He skimmed through the requirements, making a list in his journal that he could look at later. The pay, the standards, what companies were looking for... you name it. 

He went downstairs to eat with the company of Hizashi once the ramen was done, but once he was back upstairs, he continued down the rabbit-hole of jobs that he could potentially go into once he was older. 

He wasn't as interested in digital art, though. If Niko could find something in the painting industry, that would be ideal, but it was harder to get into that as an artist that wasn't well known. Like Hizashi said, he'd have to get his name out there. Start selling art for cheaper prices, and work his way up until he was more popular and galleries started to offer money for him to put their work up. He looked into the sales, what percentage of the money that the galleries took when the art got sold, and it wasn't bad. 

But again, he'd have to get his name out there first. 

It wasn't a certain path, but it was one that Niko would definitely keep in mind. 

He spent another hour or so researching before his eyes began to sting, tired and strained from his lack of sleep and focus alike. He'd been pushing himself extra hard lately between work, school, and his own mental health issues. His sleep hadn't been great, and exhaustion seemed to cling to him no matter where he went and what he did. 

Niko refused to let it affect his performance, though. He ran himself until he could barely keep his eyes open, staying up after work to do homework no matter how stressful his shift was. In result, he hadn't been seeing Sero much outside of work, or for that matter, Atsuo outside of school. 

He could tell they both knew something was up, but he couldn't explain anything. Not yet. It was too raw, too vulnerable. Niko didn't want anyone to know he'd slipped back into old habits- He didn't care if they knew he was doing bad, he just didn't want them to know how bad. 

The scars didn't really mean much. They were only a release. Not a shame, per se, but just guilt. They weren't to mutilate himself, or because he hated himself, but only a release. When he had in the past, they'd been because of self-hatred, but now it was just so easy to slip back into the easy release that he felt he had no other option. 

That was the reason Niko knew he could stop if he got better, and that it was temporary. That was also the reason he didn't want to tell anyone.

Each night, the loneliness plagued him. It haunted him like a ghost, making his bed feel cold and lonely and so fucking empty. It was unbearable. He wanted more than anything to crash back into Aizawa's arms, but fuck, his fuel of frustration and anger and bitterness was equally as strong. He absolutely refused to get back into the same relationship that they'd had before. 

He wouldn't put himself through the push and pull, the secrets kept even in Aizawa's own apartment, where they were alone, where nobody would hear them. He wouldn't keep his feelings hidden and he simply would not be with someone who couldn't show how much they loved him without being consumed by their own worries or unwillingness to open up. 

Even if Aizawa took time to open up, or say that he really did love him, Niko would go back, but only if he promised it wouldn't be the same as it was last time. Their last 'relationship' had been neither healthy nor fulfilling and Niko knew better than to get back into it. 

It didn't stop the hurt, or the desperation, but he wouldn't stoop to the level of crawling back to the older man if it wasn't going to be better. If Aizawa wasn't going to be better to him. If they didn't have a label, Niko didn't want it. 

If he was going back to Aizawa, it would be on his terms, not Aizawa's. It was all or nothing, and he didn't want it any other way. He wouldn't have it any other way. 

Chapter Text

Friday was far worse than the rest of the week, by far. It was ironic, since it led into Saturday and Sunday, which were his days off. His eyes were heavy, still raw from crying the night prior, and he was having lunch with Atsuo and Sei prior to his last few classes, art, painting and then multimedia. Niko stared down at the table, empty of lunch that he was meant to prepare this morning. He'd slept in, though, and hadn't had time to make anything before he had to leave to get to his first period. Blinking a few times to try to gather himself, he looked up at Atsuo, who was munching away happily, looking at Niko expectantly. 

"Sorry, did you ask me something?" Niko looked between him and Sei, vision briefly fuzzy. He'd been almost entirely zoned out all day, using all his energy to focus on his work and taking notes. Later, he'd use the last bits to get through his shift. 

He was drinking a rather strong energy drink, so hopefully that would pull him through. In hindsight, it could also make him stay up later, but he could barely keep his eyes open and frankly Niko didn't really have another choice. "Yeah, I asked if you wanted any of my lunch," Atsuo responded, gesturing to his food, eyes searching Niko's, "I noticed you haven't been eating as much lately."

Guilt made Niko's already-sick stomach twist into knots, and he swallowed, "No, I'm okay. And yeah, I just haven't really had time to make myself lunches." Atsuo's eyebrows knit together, and Sei looked at him a little too closely. Rushing to defend himself, Niko stuttered, "B-but I always eat when I get home. Hizashi usually has late dinner with me."

There was a moment of silence where Atsuo stared at him, but Niko looked away, racking his mind for something to change the conversation to. His gaze flitted to Sei, "Anyway, Sei. How've classes been for you?"

The black and white-haired man shrugged, "They've been okay. Nothing out of the ordinary, I guess." Sei paused, dark eyes skittering between him and Atsuo, "How've yours been, Niko?"

Don't get me started. Niko shrugged, casting a glance aside, "They've been okay. Like you said, nothing out of the ordinary. It would be more do-able if I didn't work so late." He took a sip of his drink, relishing the sweet flavor. 

"Maybe you should ask to be scheduled less." Atsuo suggested hopefully, "I noticed you've been more stressed out, and it would give you more downtime to finish your homework 'n stuff."

Having enough money for gas and to get himself food and put money into savings wasn't just something he could cut out. Even if it was killing him, he knew that he could do it. Sacrifice a little of himself? Sure, but he was still pushing himself past his limits. It was like an achievement. Eventually, he nodded, "Yeah, but I just need to put in more work in class, y'know? If I finish all my assignments in class then I won't have to stay up late to finish them at home, and I'd be ten times better."

Maybe not ten times better, but at least he wouldn't be as exhausted as he was now. Atsuo gave him a lingering look before he nodded, letting it go. Niko wasn't one to be vulnerable in front of other people and Atsuo knew that damn well. 

"I should get to class." Niko cut in, uncomfortable enough as is, and just wanting to get out. Yeah, maybe he was 30 minutes early, but he couldn't care less at the moment. It would give the other two time together anyway, "I'm gonna head upstairs. Meet you there, Atsu." He stood up abruptly, not waiting to hear if Atsuo would try and convince him to stay. He left the table quickly, spots dancing in front of his eyes, and made his way across the street to where the stairs to the commons were. 

Realistically, he could go out and buy food during lunch, and he'd probably have enough time, but... Niko wasn't even sure he'd be able to finish whatever he got. His stomach had seemed to maintain a sort of constant, subtle nausea that only got intense when he was more stressed out, and eating made it worse. Eating at home was better, because he didn't have to mask as much. Especially when he was alone in his room. 

He headed upstairs and into Aizawa's classroom early. The professor didn't comment on it, so Niko sat in his seat, running his hands through his hair and eventually letting his head rest against his palms. The quiet was blissful, and honestly he couldn't care less if Aizawa saw him right now. He was already too busy to care about what Aizawa saw, considering he'd already seen most of him... inside and out. 

Neither of them spoke, and Niko fell into a rhythm of listening to Aizawa's keyboard and pen. Resting his head on the desk, he tried to relax a little, breathing in and out slowly. The quietness compared to the constant voices outside of the classroom (and inside, in session) was a massive relief, and it allowed him to be more at ease, if only a little. Niko could feel the sleep creeping up him, but he was too tired to even lift his head, eyes were far too heavy. Yanking his hood over his head, he let the empty darkness claim him, drifting into a fitful sleep. 

Of course, it didn't last long. He felt a hand on his shoulder far too quickly, as if he'd only blinked the 25 minutes away, and raised his head groggily. The fuzzy outline of Aizawa came into view, and he squinted, clearing his eyes and focusing on the other man. 

"It's almost time for class to start."

Aizawa's voice was low, eyes locked onto Niko's features. Not friendly, but not as loud and cutting as it usually was, perhaps because Niko had just woken up. "Sorry." He mumbled, voice slurred from sleepiness. 

"Don't worry about it." The words caught him off guard, but the warmth from Aizawa's hand was already gone, heading to prop the door open. Niko watched him for a moment longer, gaze lingering on his back, before pushing himself into an upright position and pulling out his notebook and pens. 

Atsuo came in a few minutes late, looking frazzled, and rushing to sit down in his seat. "Don't rush yourself. Class didn't start five minutes ago, or anything." Aizawa commented dryly, watching Atsuo sit down. 

"Sorry, sensei." The calico-haired man responded apologetically, glancing at Niko before taking his own things out. Aizawa only scoffed and continued his lesson, voice unfriendly as ever. 

"We're honing in on the principles of design next week, so you will all be assigned a 35 page text to read over the weekend. You should all take notes on this text, otherwise you will be completely lost in next weeks lesson plans and I will not be explaining any stupid questions." Aizawa's glare combed through the class, "And there will be a small exam at the end of the week. Speaking of," He glanced at the bronze clock on the wall, "We have a quiz that goes over what we learned this week. While it isn't a large of your final grade- as none of these quizzes individually are, they add up and if you consistently get bad scores on them, it will lower your grade substantially."

"Fucking hell." Niko muttered the words under his breath, "Talk about strict." 

Atsuo must've heard him talk, but he clearly didn't understand, because he whispered back, "Huh?"

Niko shook his head dismissively, still trying to reign in his focus to absorb what Aizawa was saying. Despite having the mostly-full energy drink in his bag, he didn't drink any. If anything, he needed to save it for work. A five hour shift after all of this would not be easy on him. 

When Aizawa began to hand out the exams, near the end of class, Niko braced himself, pulling himself together as best he could. 

The dark haired man stood over him, their gazes locking for a moment, before he set the page down and turned around, "Start now. You have until the end of class in... 30 minutes."

Niko looked down at the page, reading the questions carefully. Fuck. The questions were ones he knew he'd read about, but the memory was foggy and his exhaustion was only making it worse. Glaring at the page, he answered each one the best that he could. HIs sleep-deprived, starved state made him slower than normal, scouring through his mind for the correct answers to every question, but they came in bits and pieces. 

Frustration welled up in his chest, breathing hitching in his throat. Fighting off the hot sting of tears in his eyes, he did his best, writing what he could piece together. He kept misspelling, crossing things out to messily write above what he'd written wrong. 

He finished late. Atsuo and the rest of the class had already been out of the room for a minute or so when he finished, glaring at Aizawa and sliding the paper onto his desk. He's going to bite me in the ass for this. 

Aizawa didn't so much as look up, putting it in the pile of other exams that he'd already collected, and continued to sort through something on his computer. Niko turned to leave, walking towards the door, but Aizawa spoke up, startling him, "Don't bother. Class starts in ten minutes, you'll be in here anyway."

Niko stalled, and then shrugged. Fucking whatever. He sat down in his seat, pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his head again. Unlike before, he forced himself to stay awake, breathing uneven and shaky from his frustration and high emotions. Minutes ticked by too quick for Niko's liking, but he didn't keep track. 

He heard when Aizawa stood up, walking towards the door. Waiting to hear the door click open, he instead heard the footsteps turn towards him, and Aizawa's hand just below his shoulder. He flinched, the sting of the wounds on his arm making his head snap up, eyes narrowed and bleary from being a bit too close to sleep. 

"Don't touch me. I'm awake." He hissed, voice raspy. The fire in his voice wasn't there anymore. Maybe it was exhaustion, or desperation to keep himself going, but the bitterness was still very prominent. 

Aizawa pulled his hand away, glancing at the place where he'd touched Niko, and then nodding curtly. The door was opened moments later and Niko found the seat beside him empty per usual. Atsuo wasn't in painting with him, so he spent most of his time in that class alone, working independently. 

After he got out of the remainder of his classes, he headed into a study room to get a break before work. He grabbed his sketchbook, leaning back in the chair and skimming through it. He'd had it for maybe six months now, but it was almost full. He'd have to get a new one tomorrow or sometime soon, since he only had a few pages left.

He roamed through the drawings. The earlier ones mostly consisted of concept art, landscapes and general figures, but it wasn't hard to tell who they were based on. The occasional heart or a clear feature that Aizawa had were in most of the drawings. They got more and more Aizawa-like until it hit the date where Niko had cut Aizawa off entirely, going back to concept art and persona drawings. 

"Dumbass." He muttered under his breath, staring at the drawing of Aizawa that he'd done while working at his job, the one where they were kissing hard, where he could feel the passion in each graphite line. 

He shut the sketchbook, shoving it into his bag and taking out his phone. Sero had texted him a few hours prior, just if he wanted to come over later. Niko paused, but his fingers were typing before he could stop himself. 

me: yeah im down ;3
sero: See you at 23?
me: or earlier hehe
me: depends how quick i finish up at work

He managed to finish his energy drink and one of those Yunker caffeine shots before he had to leave for work. Niko changed in the bathroom like he always did, heading out to the front. He worked with Momo again, which he was more than happy to do. She was always polite, and they got along pretty well. Plus, he didn't have to worry about Sero seeing him struggle.

He had no trouble staying awake during the rest of his shift, because of the fucking diabolical amount of caffeine he'd had. They finished early, and Niko wasted no time riding down to Sero's apartment. Parking his motorcycle, he typed in the gate passcode and headed upstairs to his apartment, ringing the doorbell. 

Sero swung the door open with a grin, "You're early, Flare." Niko brushed him aside, a smile curling up his own lips as Sero continued teasingly, "Were you that excited?"

"Maybe." Niko shrugged, feigning casualness and sliding his boots and coat off, making sure his t-shirt sleeves didn't roll up too high as he did so, "So, what did you have in mind?" His tone was innocent, turning around and studying Sero as if he really had no clue. 

"Oh, I dunno.." Sero shrugged, "Same old, maybe talking?"

"Talking?" Niko's lips split into a smirk, "So you just asked me to come over at 23:00 to talk?"

"Oh fuck off, Niko. Come here," Sero sat down on the couch, dragging Niko closer by the belt loop and down onto his lap, warm hands already slipping below the shirt he was wearing, "You still wanna keep this on?" He asked curiously, tugging at the shirt.

Niko nodded, straddling his waist and letting his hands slide up Sero's chest, settling on the back of his neck as he pressed their lips together. Their breath mixed, a moments pause before Sero dragged him in again, lips parting as he deepened the kiss hungrily. Niko dissolved into it, breathing already growing heavy as he felt Sero's teeth tease his lip, stinging with just the right amount of pain. Lust lit him aflame, body burning with arousal and anticipation.

A soft whimper slipped past his lips from the sting of teeth, and Sero grabbed his chin, pulling him back. His eyes fluttered open, instantly locking with Sero's lust-glazed ones, sending a tremor through him, "W-what?" He mumbled, hot with blush, trying to catch his breath. 

"Nothing," Sero's smile was devilish, jerking him closer by the chin. Lips brushing his, he teased, "I just wanted to see how easily you got worked up." Niko couldn't respond, drawn back into the messy, desperate kissing, rolling his hips downwards in an attempt to get any sort of stimulation. Sero's breath hitched, hands grabbing his hips and holding him in place as he grinded upwards, groaning softly.

Niko couldn't help but chuckle into the kiss, though it was cut off as Sero palmed his jeans where his erection strained, "Mmnh- Shit, S-sero," He whined, leaning into the touch, head dropping to rest on Sero's shoulder. The stimulation was addicting, body reacting without thinking as his hips jerked forwards.

His breath hitched as Sero's fingers slid down the seam, voice soft in his ear, "Take these off."

Niko tripped over himself to oblige, throwing his riding pants off and leaning flat on the couch, letting Sero hover above him with a smug grin, "So obedient, Flare." His voice was soft but oh so hot, their lips meeting in a mix of lust and hunger. Niko's body was already trembling, mind running wild. He couldn't even form a coherent thought. 

Sero's fingers slipped below his waistband, sliding along his dick slowly, teasing him at an agonizing pace. "P-please, Sero," Niko breathed into the kiss, fingers digging into his shoulders, "I need it, Sero please-" 

"You're adorable when you beg," But the words were lost in Niko's head, consumed by pleasure as Sero quickened his pace, hot sparks running up and down his body. The movement sent him into a frenzy, lips securing to Sero's neck aggressively.

"Nn- Yeah, just like that," His voice was slurred and whiny, unable to control himself as he reached up a little higher, wrapping his arms around Sero's neck, digging into his shoulders. 

"You like that, Flare? Like this?" Sero's fingers slid a little faster, a little tighter, and Niko could've sworn he could cum right there. He was reduced to pathetic moans, unable to choke out any real words. Sero chuckled softly, not letting up his pace, "You sound so-"

His movements stalled, words cutting off. Niko realized the change wasn't to tease him in an instant, pulling back anxiously, "What?"

Sero was looking elsewhere, and Niko followed his gaze to- Oh. He yanked his sleeve down, wide brown eyes locking with Sero's. The darker haired man sat up, removing his hand from Niko's boxers.

"I'm sorry," Niko burst out, rushing to try and defend himself in a panic, "Please, don't tell anyone. Please don't. I'm okay, I promise, I just had a bad moment, Sero-"

"Niko, shh, it's okay," Sero pressed a finger to his lips, scooting closer. His dark brown eyes were gentle, voice soothing, "I'm not going to tell anyone. I just... Are you sure you're okay?"

Niko avoided his gaze, looking away with a silent nod. He swallowed, all lust replaced by a cold fear, nausea returning to his gut. Sero spoke again, in that same soft tone, "I don't want you to think you have to go through anything alone. Trust me, I know how bad self-harm gets, and it's hard to stop."

Niko nodded again, numbed by fear into silence. There was a pause, and Sero asked, "Do you want to just chill at my place tonight?"

"No, I should get going." He cleared his throat, trying to sound as steady as he could and failing miserably. He got up, sliding on his pants again, hands shaking. 

"Are you sure?" Sero voice was strained, standing up and gently turning Niko to face him, "I'm not upset with you, Niko. You're not fragile and I know that damn well. I just want to make sure you know you don't have to deal with anything alone."

Niko sucked in a slow breath, controlling his emotions, and then nodding and all but yanking himself out of Sero's grip to grab his riding jacket, "I know." He didn't say anything after that, putting on his boots and such hastily. He didn't turn around to say goodbye, opening the door. "I'll see you Monday, Sero."

He shut the door and stumbled down to his bike, helmet slid onto his head, turning the key hard. The rumble echoed in the parking lot, and Niko wasted no time tearing down the street. He made it home in half the time he typically took, completely rushing past Hizashi and into his room. The door wasn't even locked when he burst into a hysterical sobbing, sliding the lock into place with shaking hands. 

He crashed into his bed against the wall, pulling his knees up to his chest and burying his face into his hands. His eyes stung, overflowing with hot tears as he struggled to breathe, choking in ragged air through tight lungs, head spinning. 

He cried for hours. It was maybe 02:45 when he finally grew quiet, eyes run out of tears to cry. He grabbed his phone, shakily typing in his passcode. Niko's first instinct was to text Aizawa, fingers stalling as he opened the message thread. Desperation made him type the words into the text box,

me: i cant do this alone shouta. can you please come and get me?

His finger hovered over the send button, but he couldn't bring himself to send it. Probably for the better. Niko stared at the screen. I'm going to fucking throw up. Against his better judgement, he scrolled up, reading over each one. Every word sent him into a deeper spiral, barely able to hold the phone still enough to even read them. 

He scrolled up months. The nicknames Aizawa used to call him, the gentleness of the messages, the secret fondness. It killed him. Niko had good self restraint, but there was nothing he wanted more than to call him right then and there and crash back into his arms. 

He couldn't and he knew it damn well, but god, he wanted to so fucking bad. He shut his phone off, and left it in his bed, sitting down in front of the aisle in his room. 

Niko spent the next hour and a half finishing his painting, and then sat down at his desk, trying to finish his homework, but he passed out halfway through reading the article for Aizawa's class.

Chapter Text

The weekend was a blur. Niko barely spoke to Hizashi, who tried to ask if he was okay, but he couldn't even respond with more than a 'I don't want to talk about it'. The nausea clung to him like a fucking parasite, making it hard to eat at all, and he didn't even have the energy to respond to anyone's texts. 

When he went to class on Monday, it was on two and a half hours of sleep. Again, he'd woken up late, chugged an energy drink, and sat down on his bike, gripping the handles with two clammy hands. Niko stared at them blankly, his whole body scarily pale. His knuckles were white gripping it, and for a moment, he thought he might pass out right there, but when it faded, he managed to turn the engine on, pulling out of the driveway. 

The entire drive there, he could barely focus. He almost hit someone when he was trying to change lanes and ran a stop sign because of how out of it he was. It was a miracle he even made it there. Glancing at his phone, he stared at the time for a few seconds. It took him more time than usual to even process the numbers, 08:45. Fuck. 

Niko scrambled to turn off the bike, sliding his helmet into the small compartment, then slinging his backpack over his shoulder and almost falling off of the bike, locking it with shaking hands. Instantly when he stood up, his vision closed in, darkness pressing in at the edges. Spots danced in front of his eyes for a solid ten seconds before he regained his full sight, pushing through the exhaustion and malnutrition to force himself up the stairs as fast as he could, rushing through the commons into Japanese. 

Yagi was mid-sentence when he burst in, but he didn't comment on Niko being late, just gesturing for him to sit down. He slumped in his seat next to Atsuo, unzipping his bag and yanking out his pen and notebook. 

For a moment, his vision tunneled on the whiteboard behind Yagi, but he couldn't process it, focusing so hard that the voices around him muffled, squinting slightly. 

It was Atsuo's warm hand on his shoulder that snapped him out of it, pain cracking through his arms and shoulders. Niko's head turned so fast he felt it in his spine, "W-what?" The whisper came out raspy and cracked. He knew it didn't look good; red-rimmed eyes, dark bags, messy hair, pale as a ghost, but there was genuinely nothing he could do to fix it- at least, not right now. 

"What's going on?" Atsuo whispered under his breath, emerald gaze swirling with fear, "Do you want to step out?"

Niko shook his head, lips parting to respond, but no words came to mind. He looked away, mumbling, "Not right now." Atsuo's hand didn't leave his shoulder for a few seconds, and Niko had to breathe through clenched teeth to control his expression. His arm was on fucking fire - only the left one, since he'd been trying to control himself, but it hurt like someone was stabbing him with a hot poker. When his hand did drop away, it took all of Niko's focus not to exhale a heavy breath, steading himself as best he could. 

The entire day, he couldn't gather an ounce of focus. He barely blinked when Sakamata called him during Political History, and during lunch, he kept missing things that were said to him. If there were notes he was supposed to take, he only caught bits and pieces, vision fuzzy, unable to control the constant phasing in and out of dissociation. 

When art came around, he barely looked at Aizawa. Not because he didn't want to, but because he could barely hold himself up to look at his paper, hand writing shaky and uneven, words scratched out and misspelled. Luckily, the assignment wasn't important, but everything that Niko had studied over the weekend and lost sleep over was nowhere to be found. No thoughts were anywhere to be found. He was a wreck.

Atsuo grabbed him by the shoulders halfway through art, forcing Niko to look at him. His eyes focused on Atsuo's, but barely, blinking mutely. "Niko, you need to talk to me. You haven't answered any of my texts since Friday morning, and you're clearly not well." His voice held no room for argument, firm and unrelenting. "Come on." He stood up, pulling the other man up with him. 

Niko stumbled to his feet, grabbing Atsuo's shoulder to stabilize himself and throwing a glance in Aizawa's direction. The dark haired professor looked beautiful, and in his mentally fucked state, he stared for a moment too long. Atsuo murmured something, but he barely registered it. Aizawa looked up, locking eyes with him, and Niko flinched. Only slightly, but he could tell Aizawa noticed, because the tiniest crease appeared in the space between his forehead and his eyebrows, and he held Niko's gaze. From the distance and because of his inability to properly focus, he couldn't tell what the other man was thinking, but Atsuo began to pull him towards the door before he could even try. 

Much to his surprise, Aizawa didn't say anything about them leaving (or... maybe Niko just didn't hear it). Atsuo led him to the gender neutral bathroom, locking the door behind them. "What is going on?" His voice was desperate at this point, gently holding Niko's face, "You have to give me something, Niko. You're a fucking wreck."

Niko searched frantically for anything to say, gaze averting anxiously, "I... I don't- I don't know, Atsuo, I can't-" "- Please, Niko. I love you." Atsuo pleaded, pulling him into a tight hug, "Please talk to me. I can tell you're not okay and I have no idea what's going on."

Niko breathed into his sweater, cracking. The fragile wall that had been holding him together shattered entirely, and he broke down, choking out broken words, but they barely made sense. "I- I just can-can't, Atsu, fuck," He cut himself off, dragging in tiny bursts of air, chest rising and falling rapidly. 

"Just breathe. Just breathe, Niko," Atsuo whispered, "In and out. Not slow, just try to control it. With me, okay?" Niko felt his chest rise and fall steadily against his own, and he did his best to follow it, breathing in and out in sync. It took him more than a few minutes to match it exactly, but it slowed his racing heart, keeping his eyes squeezed shut. "Do you want to talk now?" The soft words came after a few minutes, when Niko had stopped crying. 

He nodded, pulling back and wiping his face off, searching Atsuo's gaze. The calico-haired man didn't look at all upset with him, his vivid green gaze full of concern and what Niko would assume to be relief. Perhaps because Niko was finally telling him..?

Niko slid down against the wall with Atsuo facing him, starting slow, voice still weak and raspy, eyes stinging. 

"I.. I don't know, it started with Aizawa. I was so mad, Atsu. So mad. But then I met him at the park and fuck, I don't know, y'know?" He was well aware he was making no sense, but he couldn't speak any clearer than that, his vision darting around the room. Niko stared at the space between the tiles on the floor, the dirtied grout, and continued, taking another deep breath, "I think I just spiraled from there. I've been so busy and I can barely keep myself together with work and homework. I've been pushing myself so fucking hard to keep up with everything and.." 

He paused, meeting Atsuo's gaze again. I can't tell him this, it's going to tear him apart. Atsuo's eyes were so soft, though. So open. Niko rarely cried in front of others, but Atsuo felt safe. He kept going, "I started skipping meals to focus more. I don't even know how it piled up so fast, but I guess I overestimated how fast I could finish homework, and I always get home so late, y'know? I've been getting less and less sleep and I've been so nauseous from exhaustion and this constant, gnawing anxiety, I can barely eat even when I do have time."

He didn't even know how to get into his relapsing, looking at Atsuo's attentive expression, the judgement free eyes, "Atsuo," Niko looked away, stalling and picking at his nails. The words spilled out, increasingly more panicked, "I don't even know how to tell you, I feel so fucking awful for keeping it from you and I know I promise I'd tell you if it happened again but I just couldn't 'cause I didn't wanna worry you and I guess I just got caught up and-"

"Niko." Atsuo cut him off, and Niko looked up meeting his gaze almost fearfully, "It's okay. I'm not mad at you, and I'm not disappointed in you at all. I.. I dunno, I kind of knew? I just got this feeling a couple weeks ago that there was something bad going on that I didn't know about and you've been so... Jumpy, I guess? It wasn't hard to put the pieces together." Atsuo cracked a small smile, joking, "You have an awful poker face."

Niko let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding, looking away and then back at him again, "Are you sure you're not upset? I know I fucked up, I know I shouldn't be doing it again but I just don't know what else to do."

"I'm sure." He promised firmly, "I know you, and I know you're not suicidal anymore. I'm so, so proud of you for telling me." Atsuo's words were so genuine, his throat tightening as Atsuo continued, "I love you to bits 'n pieces Niko, and I understand where you're coming from. Not from experience, but I know you get a release from it and I trust you."

"I just want you to talk to me when you need to. There is nothing," Atsuo tilted his chin up gently, forcing Niko to meet his gaze, "Nothing that you can say that would ever make me disappointed in you. I'm so proud of you for opening up."

Niko nodded. Again, he felt that same sting in his eyes, but he'd run dry of tears. What remained was only the red eyes, the wet lashes. "I love you so much, Atsuo. You're so good to me, and I'm so grateful to have a friend like you." Niko met his gaze, forcing his voice to be steady, "Thank you, seriously."

Atsuo smiled. A real, genuine smile of relief, "You don't need to thank me for anything." There was a moment of silence, but it was broken by more conversation. 

They ended up sitting and talking inside until Multimedia, which was Niko's last class, started. He split with Atsuo in the hall, giving him a hug and heading back towards the classroom. 

Despite his talk, his gut was still twisted with anxiety, still barely able to focus. His vision spun as he walked back, eyes narrowed as he focused on the ground beneath his feet, keeping himself up. 

Fuck. Niko glanced up at the white door to Aizawa's classroom. He's going to chew me the fuck out for skipping art and painting. He didn't really have a choice, though. His bag was still inside the classroom and he needed the material for Multimedia.

Taking a deep breath, Niko tried to gather himself and pushed inside of the empty classroom. Aizawa didn't have a final class this semester, since he wasn't teaching an elective, and it was completely silent. He wouldn't have even known Aizawa was there if not for the figure leaning against his desk, arms crossed in front of his chest. His hair was down now, that same strand running down his face. He was neat per usual, wearing a black sweater that framed his torso nicely- and the same black jeans. 

"I was wondering if you were going to come back." Aizawa's voice was glacial, cutting through the silence. Niko winced inwardly, but there was no fuel, nothing that he could muster up to say in response. He barely looked at the other man as Aizawa added, "You can't keep skipping my classes because you don't feel like being here. I will be dropping your grade because of this."

"Not today, Aizawa." His voice was soft, lacking any sort of emotion as if it had been sucked out of him. Niko navigated around him, scooping up his things and turning around. He headed back to the door. Whether by some sixth sense or just knowing him, Niko felt Aizawa reach for his injured shoulder, and he turned before he could grab it. The dark eyes staring back at him blinked, but the surprise was gone in a moment, hand retracting. "Niko-"  Aizawa started again, Really? My first name? What a fucking joke, but Niko cut him off, ignoring the sharp pang that shot through his chest like a bullet at the sound of his name on Aizawa's lips. 

"Please, Aizawa. Not today." His voice betrayed him, cracking desperately, almost begging as looking up into his void-dark eyes. Aizawa was quiet for a moment, something in his expression softening. Niko felt that deep ache seize him by the throat, and he swallowed, barely able to keep his composure.

"..I was going to ask if you're okay." Aizawa's voice was unexpectedly gentle, "I'm sorry. I should've noticed when you came in that you were... out of it."

Niko turned his head sharply, trying to reign in everything that his tone, his words, made him feel. His voice failed him, unable to speak without breaking down again. A few seconds of silence passed, and he shrug.

Another pause, and Niko risked a glance. He shouldn't have, and he knew that, but it was too late to change it. The image was already burned into his eyes and he couldn't look away. Aizawa looked genuinely concerned, genuinely worried. Not that faked worry. His eyes holding the same softness that they had when Niko had told him about his mother. Fuck. His eyebrows were knit together with the most care and worry that Niko had seen from him in a long time. He spoke before the older man got the chance, words cracked and frantic, spilling out of his lips, "Please don't. I can't do this today. I don't even want to remember this even happened."

Again, he locked gazes with Aizawa, seeing that look of growing worry. His expression must've been hopeless, all but begging him to ignore it. "...Okay." Aizawa finally nodded, his dark eyes never once leaving Niko, "But Niko," There it is again, "If you need someone, anywhere, anytime, you know where I'll be."

He had to bite his cheek to hold back the torrent of pleas that he wanted to make, to hold back the desperation and hopelessness. "Okay." He whispered, nodding. Every muscle screamed at him to stop as he turned around, walking to the door and pulling it open. His whole body was shrieking to go back, to sink into his arms and rest his head on Aizawa's chest and just pour out his soul. He hesitated, fingers hovering over the doorknob for a split second.

But he didn't. He kept walking. Niko went to multimedia, barely making it before the fifteen minute mark. He barely remembered anything that was said or done during class, but he texted Sero asking if he could cover Niko's shift that night for his own sanity. To be completely honest, he knew he would just pass the fuck out before the three hour mark and it would be a complete mess. 

Sero said yes, of course, and Niko went home after class. Atsuo caught him by the door, as he was leaving. 

"Hey, are you gonna be okay?" Atsuo asked, searching his gaze. Sei was standing by the door, ten or so feet away, looking at his phone. Niko glanced at him, and then Atsuo before responding. 

Niko shook his head, "I called out. Um.. Aizawa talked to me." He averted his gaze, trying to ignore the look of shock, and then worry that crept up Atsuo's features, "Do you, uh, wanna to come over?"

"Of course I do, Nik," His response was immediate, and relieved, adding hopefully"meet you there?" Niko nodded, mustering the strength to give him a small smile, which Atsuo returned in full, beaming at him with the warmth of the summer sun.

"I'll meet you there." Niko promised, "See you in a few, Atsuo. Drive safe."