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Chapter Text

Shen Qingqiu stared at the hissing, sputtering stream of acid. In the dim light of the dungeon, it seemed like an opaque green curtain, a bright leaf green that reminded Shen Qingqiu of the bamboo leaves that surrounded the bamboo house in springtime. But other than that, the water prison of Huan Hua Palace was as unlike his home in Qing Jing as any two places could be. The perpetual sound of rushing water reminded Shen Qingqiu of nothing more than an endlessly flushing toilet bowl.

Stray droplets of acid smoked when they landed on the dark grey stone tiles. The acrid stench of it invaded his nostrils, the chilly damp clung to his skin, and the fumes in the air stung Shen Qingqiu’s eyes.

Footsteps echoed on the hard stone from somewhere in the darkness beyond. Shen Qingqiu felt dread rise in his gut. He knew he was here because of one person: Luo Binghe. This was the beginning of the protagonist’s revenge arc. Luo Binghe would probably wait on the limb-ripping until after the trial. Surely, Luo Binghe wouldn’t risk Shen Qingqiu being visibly maimed in front of the jianghu’s representatives?

But ah, “not visibly maimed” still left an uncomfortable amount of possibilities. Especially with the blood parasites in Shen Qingqiu’s gut!

And as expected, Luo Binghe came into view. At Jin Lan his hair had held familiar curls, but here and now it was straightened and fell like the curtains of acid all around, as fine and elegant as Shen Qingqiu’s normally was. It was as though he’d stepped straight out of one of the illustrations of Proud Immortal Demon Way; Shen Qingqiu could barely reconcile this man with the little sheep he had once taught.

Fine embroidery glittered at his collar and the hems of Luo Binghe’s robes, tiny obsidian stones worked amongst the stitches. They shone in the dim light like his eyes, no longer the bright stars they’d once been, but flinty and hard and cold. The thick brocade of his outer robe was far too fine for a guest of Huan Hua; but then, Luo Binghe was now also the emperor of the demon realm. And in this choice of robes to wear, he was showing Shen Qingqiu the wealth that came with that power. Why else would he wear such finery to a dungeon, where stray flecks of acid would easily destroy the silk? It was all a display.

That didn’t stop it from working. Shen Qingqiu’s throat clicked as he swallowed.

“Shen Qingqiu,” Luo Binghe called out with a mock-sweetness. Shen Qingqiu could see the anger in his eyes, could feel the power of his qi palpable in the air.

“Luo Binghe,” Shen Qingqiu replied with a cool nod, as though welcoming Luo Binghe as a guest into his living room for tea.

The mock-niceties went nowhere from there. What could either of them say? Though they once had the closeness and ease of master and disciple, they were bitter enemies now.

The susurrus of falling acid was the only sound in the dungeon as Luo Binghe watched Shen Qingqiu, fallen from grace to this dismal prison. No longer the peerless immortal of Qing Jing Peak, Shen Qingqiu was bound and chained like the lowest of criminals! Soon the trial Luo Binghe orchestrated would reveal him as one, and then his fate would be–

“What was the first night hunt I attended?” Luo Binghe asked, his dark eyes flashing briefly with demonic red.

Shen Qingqiu froze in place, baffled by the unexpected question. What kind of question was that? Shen Qingqiu might have expected “Would you like me to start with the left arm or the right,” or, “Do you know what it feels like to be boiled alive,” or maybe even, “Why did you push me into the Abyss,” but this was just a factual event?

Was Luo Binghe leading into that betrayal where Shen Qingqiu had sold him out to the skinner demon to get the System to act and save them both?

Shen Qingqiu pressed his lips together and said nothing.

Luo Binghe’s eyes glowed even more brightly, his lips turning down and a hint of fang peeking through. “Shizun, don’t be so stubborn,” he sighed, and then Shen Qingqiu felt the blood parasites inside him begin to stir and gnaw.

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. After a few moments of trying to hold out against the pain, Shen Qingqiu gave in. They both knew what the answer was. And moreover, there were records of the night hunt on Qing Jing. If Luo Binghe for some reason wanted to access them, he would.

“The one in Shuang Hu, with the skinner demon?” Shen Qingqiu gritted out. The pain stopped; the blood parasites subsided.

Luo Binghe’s gaze had been cool, but now it warmed slightly. Shen Qingqiu had answered correctly? Well, of course he had, this was a factual truth!

“When did I move into the Bamboo House with you?” Luo Binghe practically purred the words.

Luo! Binghe! Don’t make it sound like that!

Shen Qingqiu couldn’t help the heat rising in his cheeks. Moving the young white lotus Luo Binghe into his home had been completely innocent, but with Luo Binghe looking like–like this, in all his powerful protagonist glory, asking about living together with Shen Qingqiu in that sort of way, didn’t it feel a little…

Wait, was Luo Binghe deliberately trying to insinuate that Shen Qingqiu had moved him into the Bamboo house for perverse reasons? Was he trying to establish that Shen Qingqiu had designs on Luo Binghe, rather than Ning Yingying? But ah, Shen Qingqiu had spotted the trap of words, and in any case, he definitely had never done anything to Luo Binghe!

“After the attack on Qiong Ding, this teacher saw Luo Binghe’s potential and thought it best to oversee his training directly. And Luo Binghe did improve in leaps and bounds under this teacher’s tutelage, did he not?”

Forget humility! Luo Binghe, recall all that this teacher did for you! Wasn’t it a whole lot less of the abuse and whipping, and a whole lot more of meditation and training? Didn’t some of what this old teacher taught you help, fighting the beasts of the Abyss? How about a little mercy in return, ah?!

“Under your tutelage…” For a moment, Luo Binghe’s mouth twisted into a bitter scowl. Then it was gone, wiped clean from that beautiful face, and instead a glow of victory began to light him up from within. “Shizun, I’ve got you,” Luo Binghe sang, smug.

Shen Qingqiu shivered in the cold of the dungeon. He was discomfited by the line of questioning, and did not like to be the sole focus of Luo Binghe’s intense looks. Then Luo Binghe dropped to his knees before Shen Qingqiu, taking the shackle binding Shen Qingqiu’s ankle and easily crushing the iron chain in his grip. The bits of metal tinkled to the stone floor, plink plink plink, as Shen Qingqiu tried valiantly not to flinch away. Luo Binghe had no need for displays of power to Shen Qingqiu of all people; Shen Qingqiu knew it all! Shen Qingqiu knew far, far too much to be comfortable, actually!

Luo Binghe drew Shen Qingqiu to his feet, and Shen Qingqiu’s knees might have trembled and shook, but that was definitely because he’d been kneeling on cold stone for days! Shen Qingqiu looked down at his freed feet, and then decided to push his luck and proffered his wrists, still wrapped tight in the immortal binding cable that trapped his qi.

Luo Binghe looked them over and shook his head. “Not yet,” he said dismissively, and reached for the hilt of his sword.

Shit, was this it, was he going to strike Shen Qingqiu down right here and now?

“Who are you?” Came the voice of–Luo Binghe. From the far side of the room.

Shen Qingqiu turned and spotted in the darkness another Luo Binghe.

Uh?

This Luo Binghe looked almost identical to the first; dark curls made his appearance a little more familiar, and his overrobe's embroidery was a slightly different pattern. But their faces were perfectly identical to one another, as though the falling acid had turned to mirrors, creating illusory reflections of Luo Binghe himself.

It was like something Shen Qingqiu had dreamed once, and in it the Luo Binghes had–but never mind that. Dreams were weird. It certainly wasn’t going to happen now! Anyway!

“So you can sense when I use our blood parasites,” the first Luo Binghe tsked. “How annoying.”

Our blood parasites?

“Take off that disguise, demon, and reveal yourself,” said the interloper. He radiated the fury of a Luo Binghe wronged and wrathful.

“You’re the cheap copy,” snapped the Luo Binghe that had been interrogating Shen Qingqiu, high and mighty as an emperor being harassed by cannon fodder. “Why don’t you get lost!”

Uh?!

“Shizun,” the new Luo Binghe called out. “That’s not me. Get away from him!” He sounded strangely worried, as though he cared if Shen Qingqiu were hurt.

“I finally have Shizun, and I won’t let you take him from me,” spat the Luo Binghe who had freed Shen Qingqiu, which come to think of it had also been weird and OOC. What about his revenge arc? Why would he set his greatest enemy free?

Shen Qingqiu backed away from them both. How was he supposed to tell which was real? Neither of them were acting like Luo Binghe! What the fuck was going on?!

What plot was this? Wife #32, the one with the clones and the threesome? But both the Luo Binghes were able to talk, it couldn’t be that. The Twin Buds of Devastation plotline–but no, that canonically didn’t work on demons. Or perhaps–

The new Luo Binghe drew his sword. There was no doubt. That was definitely the legendary Xin Mo! And it was unique in all the world, the protagonist’s golden finger. So that was the real Luo Binghe, and the one Shen Qingqiu had been speaking to was a fake!

The Luo Binghe standing closest to Shen Qingqiu also drew–Xin Mo. It was unmistakable.

Uh?!?!

Shen Qingqiu felt his brain blue-screen as the two Luo Binghe’s and their not-unique-after-all swords clashed. What the fuck? Even if Luo Binghe had run across one of the plotlines that caused duplicates and clones, and even if for some reason the plot device worked on Luo Binghe, how was Xin Mo being duplicated as well?!

“Get away from Shizun!” The new Luo Binghe demanded, leveling his Xin Mo at the elegant Luo Binghe with a ferocious glare.

“He’s mine now,” the elegant Luo Binghe gnashed his teeth and struck back. The Xin Mo blades ground against each other with a metallic screech that made Shen Qingqiu’s teeth ache. “You don’t deserve him. Your foolishness will cause his death. I’m saving him from you!”

Shen Qingqiu winced as a deflected strike broke through the wall of the water prison, sending acid spraying outwards and sunlight streaming in.

A familiar head peeked through the opening. Liu Qingge!

Had he been camped outside the water prison this whole time, just waiting for an opportunity? No matter; the opportunity had come! Quick, let them sneak away while the Luo Binghes fought one another!

Liu Qingge took in the scene: Shen Qingqiu, quietly motioning at him and sidling across the stone walkway towards him. The two Luo Binghes laying hits on one another with impossibly powerful matched demonic swords.

“Luo Binghe! What is going on?” Liu Qingge bellowed, drawing Cheng Luan and raising it high.

Shen Qingqiu did not–was too dignified to–facepalm.

The elegant Luo Binghe called out, “This is a demon that is going to kill Shen Qingqiu!”

The other Luo Binghe scowled. “He lies! This is an imposter, and he’s trying to take Shizun away!”

Liu Qingge’s face darkened. “If a demon has come so close to Shen Qingqiu, then Huan Hua has failed miserably to keep him safe for the trial. Cang Qiong will take him now!”

And with that, Liu Qingge sent a sword glare at the two fighting Luo Binghes; or rather, the pool of acid just by their feet.

Acid sprayed up and over them both in a bright green wave. Shen Qingqiu wasn’t worried–Luo Binghe had survived the Acid Ooze and the Great Gelatinous River in his journey through the Abyss–but he was distracted watching the green liquid come down on his disciple. Even if Luo Binghe would recover, what if he got hurt?!

An arm seized round his middle and then Shen Qingqiu was thrown ungracefully over Liu Qingge's shoulder like a sack of potatoes, totally undignified! Liu Qingge’s armor dug into his ribs as Liu Qingge made for the opening in the water prison walls.

Shen Qingqiu gave Liu Qingge’s ponytail a reproachful tug. Liu Qingge made an odd choked sound, then grunted, “Shen Qingqiu! This is not the time!”

“I can walk,” Shen Qingqiu said, miffed.

A bigger thump to the ribs, the world flipped upside down, and then suddenly Shen Qingqiu was cradled in the arms of one of the Luo Binghes as the other laid into Liu Qingge with a powerful kick that sent him flying.

The acid had caused the straight-haired Luo Binghe’s hair to frizz into curls and dissolved massive holes in both their overrobes. The embroidery at the robe hems that distinguished them was definitely gone now. Identical heavenly demon zuiyins marked both their brows over demon-red eyes that glowed with anger. No matter how hard Shen Qingqiu looked, the two Luo Binghes were now completely indistinguishable.

“You’re both demons?” Liu Qingge smashed Cheng Luan into Xin Mo, enhancing the blow with qi. The Luo Binghe fighting him was forced back a step. “Then it doesn’t matter which is an imposter. I’ll kill you both!”

“Liu-shidi, you can’t!” Shen Qingqiu blurted as he struggled to free himself from Luo Binghe’s arms. One of these two was the protagonist himself, and Liu Qingge would never be able to defeat him. The best they could do was run away together, and buy some time!

Liu Qingge turned to him, eyes wide. “You knew,” he breathed. “You’re too soft-hearted, Shen Qingqiu! To think you mourned so many years for a demon like this!”

Liu Qingge! Don’t talk about mourning in front of the Luo Binghes! Who was mourning? Certainly not Shen Qingqiu!

Ridiculous though they were, Liu Qingge’s words enraged the Luo Binghe holding Shen Qingqiu. Shen Qingqiu could feel the demonic qi radiating off him, and underneath could sense the taint of Xin Mo destabilizing him further. Luo Binghe would need to find a wife soon after this battle to rebalance his qi, or risk a deviation. This was the price he had to pay to wield the mighty golden finger of the protagonist.

The other Luo Binghe was just as infuriated, and lunged at Liu Qingge. Liu Qingge sidestepped the blow and drove Luo Binghe’s arm to the side. Xin Mo’s dark blade buried itself in the stone floor.

Liu Qingge shifted to attacking the Luo Binghe holding Shen Qingqiu. Shen Qingqiu used the distraction to burst free and then quickly got clear of the fight; with his hands and qi still bound, he was as helpless as a mortal. He would only get in the way.

Liu Qingge traded blows with one Luo Binghe, and then the other wrested Xin Mo free.

“Liu-shidi!” Shen Qingqiu called out in warning.

Liu Qingge deflected the Xin Mo of the Luo Binghe he was fighting, and drove Cheng Luan into that Luo Binghe’s shoulder. The other Xin Mo lashed across his unprotected back.

Blood sprayed. Liu Qingge crumpled.

“Stop!” Shen Qingqiu shouted. His throat burned. Liu Qingge couldn’t die! Luo Binghe couldn’t kill him! Let whatever might happen to Shen Qingqiu happen! He was sunk. This was the consequence of his actions. But Liu Qingge couldn’t go down with him! “Please,” Shen Qingqiu begged. “Don’t kill him. Please.”

The Luo Binghe that struck Liu Qingge down stood tall and uninjured, but at Shen Qingqiu’s words his face twisted as though in pain. “You care so much for so many!” He snarled. “Why him? Why–” He shook his head.

The injured Luo Binghe seized the opening and attacked. But his sword arm was wounded and weak; his healthy twin disarmed him with a simple twist. And then the victorious Luo Binghe pressed Xin Mo against the other’s throat.

Looking at the Luo Binghe that stood tall over his defeated opponents, Shen Qingqiu knew one thing for certain: this was the real Luo Binghe. Because in this world there was one universal truth: the true Luo Binghe would be victorious over any and all of his enemies.

“I’ll come with you, just leave them alone,” Shen Qingqiu promised desperately. Even if the other Luo Binghe wasn’t real, Shen Qingqiu couldn’t watch him be hurt.

“No,” protested the fake, and Liu Qingge struggled to get up.

The real Luo Binghe planted a foot against the bleeding wound on Liu Qingge’s back, and pressed him back down. It must have been agonizing; Liu Qingge tried to push up against it anyway.

“I won’t give up,” Liu Qingge vowed, straining to rise against Luo Binghe’s booted heel. “I won’t ever stop fighting to save him.”

Luo Binghe let out a gusty sigh. “I’m aware,” he said, visibly irritated. “You’re uniquely annoying that way.”

Luo Binghe eyed Liu Qingge contemplatively, then shook his head. “Sorry, Shizun, but I can’t spare them,” he said with a bright smile. “But I’ll make it up to you.”

The clone’s hand came up to grip Xin Mo’s bare blade, just in time. The swing that would have taken his head off merely cut his throat. Blood ran down Xin Mo’s edge.

As the clone fell to his knees and clutched his torn throat, trying to hold the ragged ends together, Luo Binghe turned to plant Xin Mo through Liu Qingge’s back. The blood coating it moved like a living thing, yanking the sword to the side. It struck the stone beside Liu Qingge, barely missing his arm.

Luo Binghe looked at the clone and scowled. “Stop that,” he demanded. “Why are you trying to save him?”

The clone didn’t say anything. Couldn’t say anything. He coughed, and blood painted his lips and leaked down his chin.

Shen Qingqiu moved to the edge of the walkway and glanced nervously down into the glittering pool of green acid, hissing and seething. “Luo Binghe,” he called out. “Let them go, or I’ll… I’ll…”

Could he really throw himself into the acid, a quick yet still agonizingly painful death?

But luckily the halting, empty threat was enough. Luo Binghe rushed to his side, leaving the clone and Liu Qingge where they lay.

“I won’t let you get away from me,” Luo Binghe threw an arm around Shen Qingqiu and dragged their bodies together. Shen Qingqiu almost faceplanted into that warm, toned chest. “You won’t be allowed to self-destruct.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Shen Qingqiu saw Liu Qingge climb to his feet, then stagger. He really wasn’t going to give up, even wounded like that?

But it wasn’t like there was anything more Shen Qingqiu could do to save him. Shen Qingqiu could barely breathe; it felt like the air was being squeezed from his chest.

Luo Binghe’s other arm swung, and Xin Mo’s blade blazed with dark flames. The stone of the dungeons, the sunlight filtering in, the spraying acid; all of it distorted and crumpled in Xin Mo’s wake, a jagged void cutting through it all as though Luo Binghe were tearing a hole in flimsy paper to reveal a vast emptiness beyond.

Shen Qingqiu’s fingers ached where they gripped Luo Binghe’s shoulder. The fine silk and the warm skin beneath felt real and solid. It anchored Shen Qingqiu even as the yawning void seemed to suck them both in with hungry tendrils of demonic qi.

Luo Binghe looked down at Shen Qingqiu–when had he grown so tall–and then smirked. He looked back at the fake Luo Binghe and Liu Qingge; both were watching in horror.

Liu Qingge kept trying to move forward, then fell to his knees. The blood loss was beginning to affect him, then. But the commotion would have attracted Huan Hua’s attention. They would be coming soon, and even if it ended up a blow to Cang Qiong’s pride that they found Liu Qingge in such a state, at least he would be healed, and live.

The clone’s throat was healing already. He reached out towards Shen Qingqiu, and Shen Qingqiu could see the gaping hole had mostly mended. The fake could regenerate?! But it seemed whoever or whatever this was had also copied the regenerative power of Luo Binghe. He would be fine.

The clone’s mouth was open as though he was yelling something, but the portal beside Shen Qingqiu devoured all sound.

“Too slow,” the real Luo Binghe said, the words a whisper barely heard and quickly swallowed. The zuiyin on his forehead glowed red, giving his familiar features a hellish cast. It added a wrathful tinge to the victorious grin that split his face.

Then Luo Binghe stepped into the portal, dragging Shen Qingqiu in with him.

The world–ended. Shen Qingqiu could see nothing; not even Luo Binghe, although he still felt Luo Binghe’s arms wrapped around him. But there was no air, no gravity, no light. It felt as though the void was trying to consume them both. Shen Qingqiu felt impossibly cold, chilled to his core. And yet his skin burned as though he had jumped in the acid and was now being eaten away.

Another moment passed, and then Shen Qingqiu was stumbling forward into a large chamber. The void was gone; they were in an ordinary room, and the stone under Shen Qingqiu’s feet was hard and unforgiving, and Shen Qingqiu could hear his own ragged gasps and feel a slight breeze on his face.

“What–” Shen Qingqiu wheezed out.

That was not how traveling by Xin Mo had been described in Proud Immortal Demon Way! Luo Binghe could withstand any torment after the trials of the Abyss, but he’d traveled with his wives all over the place by Xin-Mo-portal during the later arcs. Xin Mo was Luo Binghe’s golden finger, and Luo Binghe used it readily. There was no way Luo Binghe’s wives would go through something like that and be ready to fuck straight after! Shen Qingqiu refused to believe that trembling waif Wife #96 was made of stern enough stuff for that! And she’d gone through three successive transitions by portal, as part of the gathering of Luo Binghe’s armies for the great battle in her arc. Ha! If Luo Binghe’s armies were traveling by this sort of portal, they’d surely be too sick to fight when they reached their destination! How could–

Shen Qingqiu realized he was trembling, and forced himself to still.

Luo Binghe’s hold had loosened, and he had stepped away. But he was still watching Shen Qingqiu with faux concern. Shen Qingqiu was sure inside he was delighted to see his foe so weak. Shen Qingqiu had to look composed. He wouldn’t crumble, not in front of Luo Binghe–he had to have some pride!

Shen Qingqiu raised his head and his fingers itched for a fan; of course, it had been confiscated on his imprisonment. Instead he glared diffidently around the room.

Black stone floors. Blood red columns reaching to a high, vaulted ceiling. No windows; only glowing orbs high above giving off an unearthly light.

Shen Qingqiu swallowed.

He was in the throne room of Luo Binghe’s underground palace.

Luo Binghe had vanquished his evil clone, and retrieved the damsel–er, the villain. That was a plot point that Shen Qingqiu couldn’t recall, but it definitely had the feel of one of Airplane-Shooting-in-the-Sky’s more ludicrous soap-opera type storylines.

But–but–

Shen Qingqiu swallowed down a scream.

Had they just skipped the trial arc? Oh fuck, was it human stick time already?!

Luo Binghe hadn’t brought Shen Qingqiu to his underground palace until the trial was well over and the tortures had really begun! Shen Qingqiu had been trying to delay the trial as much as possible, setting it a month out to buy time for his replacement body to grow; so the protagonist had responded to the delay in his vengeance by skipping the arc?! Several arcs, actually?!

What kind of butterfly effect fucking shit was this?! Putting off the trial by a month somehow led to a clone plotline that led to his doom faster? Or had Liu Qingge’s survival and attempted rescue influenced things somehow?!

Did any of that matter when Shen Qingqiu was now utterly in Luo Binghe’s power, subject to anything the demon emperor wished to do to him, completely out of reach of the jianghu, anyone who could help, and any soul-sending arrays that might have propelled his spirit to the Sun and Moon Dew Mushroom body that certainly still wasn’t ready?!

System! System, give me something, anything! Shen Qingqiu desperately tried to summon the interface. The jade guanyin, I need it right now!

He had to neutralize Luo Binghe’s anger points, fast!

[Error! Error! Multiverse package not installed–universe key not found–]

You shitty glitch knockoff Siri, give me my inventory!

But it was no use. The blue screen shattered into pixels, reformed, and shattered again.

[Error! Error! Error!]

And did absolutely fucking nothing.

Shen Qingqiu’s stomach sank as he stared at the fractured blue lights swirling through the air like motes of dust, still bearing fragments of their useless message.

[Err–]

[!-]

[.]

Oh shit.

Was he going to die now?

“Luo Binghe,” Shen Qingqiu began. And stopped. He didn’t know what to say. What could he say that would undo all that had happened between them?

“Shizun,” Luo Binghe replied with a mocking smile. “Recovering quickly, I see. I apologize for the difficult transition; traveling by Xin Mo’s interdimensional portals can be quite a challenge.”

This was all said smoothly, calm and reassuring with just a touch of concern. As though Luo Binghe really was worried for his teacher’s wellbeing. Truly, Luo Binghe was a talented liar!

“It was nothing,” Shen Qingqiu sniffed disdainfully. He was fine!

Luo Binghe’s smile grew. “As Shizun says,” he agreed. “Do not worry; you will not need to travel again. Your place is here. This emperor will personally see to it that you have a very pleasurable time.”

Shit. Shen Qingqiu did not like the sound of that. What an ominous statement! Luo Binghe might as well have said: this palace shall be your tomb! And Shen Qingqiu knew that very well already, thank you!

“This humble teacher will be fine on his own,” Shen Qingqiu demurred. Please, no personal attentions, even being tortured by minions would beat facing the ministrations of a vengeful Luo Binghe!

Shen Qingqiu looked around desperately for a means of escape, a weapon, a distraction, anything! And then like a heavenly salvation, there came the sound of delicately ringing bells. The Demon Saintess, Sha Hualing! Whatever business she came to talk to Luo Binghe about was surely more important than Shen Qingqiu, and moreover Shen Qingqiu might even get the chance to slip away while they were distracted!

Instead of Sha Hualing, however, Shen Qingqiu’s gaze fell on a man swathed in red. Where Sha Hualing’s outfit had exposed as much skin as possible without quite being pornographic (all the better for fanservice purposes), this man was bound in thick red cloth from neck to ankles. Shen Qingqiu saw glimmers of what must have been golden bells peek from beneath the hems, and another set of bells was wound through the man’s long dark hair. But that was definitely not Sha Hualing–or any character Shen Qingqiu could recognize.

Had she been genderbent? No, not one of Luo Binghe’s wives, no way! That was far too gay! There was no homo for Luo Binghe, not in all of Proud Immortal Demon Way!

“Sha Yuan, look,” Luo Binghe gestured grandly at Shen Qingqiu as if to say: behold! My scum villain Shizun!

The man who was apparently Sha Yuan gave Shen Qingqiu an unimpressed stare and crossed his arms with a faint tinkle. “Congratulations,” he said, clearly sulking.

Sha Yuan? Who was Sha Yuan?! Perhaps Sha Hualing’s brother–if Shen Qingqiu squinted, he could see a familial resemblance. Sha Hualing's pretty features scrunched up in an impressively petulant sulk. But Shen Qingqiu didn’t recall Sha Hualing having any siblings in Proud Immortal Demon Way. Sha Yuan must have been a truly forgettable side character or cannon fodder if Shen Qingqiu couldn’t remember him at all.

“And you doubted me,” Luo Binghe radiated smugness. “But now I finally have a Shizun of my very own.”

“I never doubted Junshang could do anything he put his mind to,” Sha Yuan refuted. “I only hoped he would choose to do something else.”

Luo Binghe chuckled. “It was all worth it. All that searching, all those worlds, every moment.”

Sha Yuan glared at Shen Qingqiu. “He’s lovely,” his mouth said. Go die in a fire, his eyes conveyed.

Shen Qingqiu was now 100%, absolutely certain this mysterious Sha Yuan loathed him with every fiber of his being. And fair enough! Shen Qingqiu was the scum villain after all.

But–lovely? What an odd thing to say.

“He is,” Luo Binghe replied.

And then Shen Qingqiu’s view was full of Luo Binghe’s face, dark eyes full of determination, his clawed hands cradling Shen Qingqiu’s cheeks and forcing Shen Qingqiu to stare directly at him. Red lips parted and–

And–

Luo Binghe’s lips were soft. Pleasant. His tongue, gently tracing Shen Qingqiu’s trembling lower lip. His hand, sweeping around Shen Qingqiu’s back to firmly grope his ass and pull him in tight. And the hilt of Xin Mo, jabbing Shen Qingqiu uncomfortably in the stomach as Shen Qingqiu wriggled to try and get a little breathing room.

“Mine,” Luo Binghe purred into Shen Qingqiu’s mouth.

Shen Qingqiu jerked away as far as Luo Binghe would let him–which wasn’t far. Their faces were still close as two lovers, their bodies tightly wound together.

Luo Binghe reached out. Shen Qingqiu remained frozen, unable to say or do anything, as Luo Binghe tucked a stray lock of hair behind Shen Qingqiu’s ear. The tip of his clawed finger brushed Shen Qingqiu’s skin, and he shivered.

What. The. Fuck.

“Is Shizun cold?” Luo Binghe asked in a voice so syrupy sweet it struck fear into Shen Qingqiu’s heart. “This emperor can warm Shizun up.”

With a start, Shen Qingqiu realized he recognized that line. It was one of the bog-standard Luo Binghe pickup lines he used with maidens he’d found lost in the wilderness. Okay, so this was probably the real Luo Binghe, if he was using one of the default dialogue options except that no, he was using wife lines on the scum villain, he was kissing Shen Qingqiu, had Luo Binghe lost his mind?!?!

“You must be confused,” Shen Qingqiu began, because he himself certainly was.

“On the contrary,” Luo Binghe replied. “I’ve never seen more clearly.”

In truth his eyes were bright, alert, and intensely focused on Shen Qingqiu. Shen Qingqiu wanted to melt away under that fiery gaze. It was too much, too much!

“I think you may have been afflicted with–ah–” Shen Qingqiu’s mind raced as he tried to come up with at least a semi-plausible plot device that could cause… what? A determination to kiss his scum villain teacher? What in the name of crack fanfic was this?!

“Afflicted by love for you,” Luo Binghe said smoothly, fluttering dark lashes like he was attempting to give Shen Qingqiu a bedroom-eyed look.

“It’s not real,” Shen Qingqiu insisted. He decided to be daring, and planted his hands on Luo Binghe’s shoulders, intending to push Luo Binghe back, just a little, to get some breathing room! The room was starting to feel really hot between the natural heat of Luo Binghe’s body, his demonic qi, and Shen Qingqiu’s embarrassment at those faces Luo Binghe was making and lines he was saying!

But Luo Binghe was a heavenly demon, and as Shen Qingqiu really should have expected, wouldn’t be shifted at all. So instead of pushing Luo Binghe away, didn’t his hands on Luo Binghe’s shoulders seem almost a little… a little…!

Shen Qingqiu looked away from Luo Binghe and caught sight of Sha Yuan. He was glowering fiercely, as befit someone watching his sister’s husband molest a man. But he didn’t look surprised. And he wasn’t moving to keep his poor sex pollened brother-in-law from making a huge mistake.

Still, Shen Qingqiu hoped Sha Yuan wouldn’t leave him alone with Luo Binghe. Even if he was afflicted with some sort of delirium-inducing flower, there would be limits to what Luo Binghe would try with his brother-in-law standing right there, right?!

“It is real,” Luo Binghe argued, fervent as a man possessed. “More real than anything I’ve ever felt. Shizun, ever since I first met you–the real you, the kind Shizun, not the other one–I’ve wanted you. More than anyone or anything.”

That sent chills like ice down Shen Qingqiu’s spine. Not the other one. Could Luo Binghe mean… the Original Goods? But how could Luo Binghe have found out–what was he saying–was he saying he wanted Shen Qingqiu, even after–

“The–abyss–” Shen Qingqiu squeaked out.

Luo Binghe’s hand cupped Shen Qingqiu’s cheek. “That wasn’t you,” he said. How did he know? Had he found out about the system? “You never pushed me. You pushed the other, the fake, and I don’t care about him.”

That ground Shen Qingqiu’s thoughts to a halt. He’d pushed a fake? No, the person that he’d pushed into the Abyss, that he’d betrayed, had definitely been the bona fide Luo Binghe! Shen Qingqiu could remember all too clearly his white sheep’s devastated look, the tears in his eyes, the desperation and determination of a true protagonist.

Unless–had the clone thing happened back then? But then why had it taken years for either Luo Binghe to come back?

Luo Binghe’s gaze softened. “Ah, I should introduce myself properly, shouldn’t I,” he mused. Then, “I am Luo Binghe, emperor of the Three Realms, Conqueror of the Jianghu, Slayer of the Dragon of Fate. I am the true wielder of Xin Mo, the one who unlocked its full potential to cross between worlds. I have journeyed across the multiverse to find… you.”

Shen Qingqiu kind of wanted to applaud. It was the sort of dramatic speech he would have eaten up in Proud Immortal Demon Way; even now, the dramatic flourish of it all was making his heart race. Truly there was no one who could deliver a climactic speech like Luo Binghe!

But Shen Qingqiu couldn’t fully appreciate Luo Binghe’s panache. His mind was stuck on the image of a Luo Binghe reaching for him in the water prison, throat healed but bloody after having been slashed wide open. That had been his Binghe then. The one with a cause for vengeance against Shen Qingqiu, apparently worlds away now.

Luo Binghe went on, not the least bit discouraged by the fish-eyed staring Shen Qingqiu was surely doing. “I met you once, in a possible future. You showed me such kindness, such generosity of spirit that my heart was moved.”

A possible future? What kindness?! Shen Qingqiu didn't remember any of this!

Luo Binghe laced his fingers through Shen Qingqiu’s and placed their joined hands on his chest. Shen Qingqiu watched it happen, feeling like that hand was a strange object not attached to him. Those couldn’t be his fingers, intermingled with Luo Binghe’s claws, pressed against his chest to feel his warm skin and beating heart.

“I could not bear for you to belong to anyone but me,” Luo Binghe declared. “I will have you. Marry me.”

Shen Qingqiu’s internal monologue was just layers of screaming. He kept staring at Luo Binghe, blinking, trying to bring the world into focus.

Luo Binghe was saying he wanted to marry Shen Qingqiu. Who was the scum villain who had betrayed him and–but no, Shen Qingqiu had done no such thing to this Luo Binghe, it seemed.

But Shen Qingqiu was a man!

For an absurd moment, Shen Qingqiu wanted to double-check. Maybe he’d been genderbent when he wasn’t looking! Who knew what was going on?!

Luo Binghe was… gay? The OG Luo Binghe? Really?!

And if he was gay, what did that mean for Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe, the one he’d raised? Could that Luo Binghe… also be gay?!

Shen Qingqiu was certain he’d raised his Binghe to be the straightest of men. If even the Original Goods turned gay, though… then what if…

But how could Bing-ge be gay and married to hundreds of women? It just made no sense. But if he was married to hundreds of women, why was he saying he wanted to marry Shen Qingqiu?!

“Maybe this Shen Qingqiu is defective,” Sha Yuan said hopefully, interrupting the long and awkward silence. “Junshang, this humble advisor can dispose of him!”

Luo Binghe waved away this alarming offer. “His mind works in strange ways,” Luo Binghe assured Sha Yuan. “I’ve seen his dreams. He’s always like this. This will take time.”

Then Luo Binghe turned back to Shen Qingqiu. “Do not mistake my intentions,” he said. “I will show you the depths of my devotion. And then you will love me.”

Shen Qingqiu’s eyes met Sha Yuan’s over Luo Binghe’s shoulder. If Sha Yuan’s glare at Shen Qingqiu had burned with hatred before, it was now seeking to emulate an instant-death ray.

“No thank you,” Shen Qingqiu got out with only the faintest hint of a squeak.

No matter how cool Luo Binghe was–to marry him? This must be part of a plot. Or maybe a sign of madness! Yes, Shen Qingqiu must have gone insane in the water prison. Clones and genderbent wives and Luo Binghe thirsting for him–the bizarre happenings now all made sense! Shen Qingqiu must have lost his mind. Anything was more likely than this!

And if not, then he was definitely going to go mad, if this was real. Which it wasn’t. So either way! Bring on the straightjackets!

Chapter Text

The Original Luo Binghe of Proud Immortal Demon Way had seduced his harem members with a wide variety of tactics. Flattery, gifts, rescue from certain death.

Luo Binghe was trying all these methods and more.

"Perhaps these will be up to your oh-so-vaunted standards," Sha Yuan was completely hidden from view by the massive flower arrangement he held, but Shen Qingqiu could recognize Sha Yuan by his sarcasm at this point. "Although possibly your tastes are too unusual to appreciate Cat's Whisper Peonies. If you prefer, I can bring by some Bee-sting Nettle instead. I think it would suit you much better."

"I don't have any more room for more flowers," Shen Qingqiu rubbed his temples as Sha Yuan struggled through the doorway; the bouquet was too big to even fit through it.

"Complaining about your rooms?" Sha Yuan pushed through with a rustle of greenery and a few shed leaves. "There's still an open cell in the dungeons, I just checked."

"I'd expected more wisdom from an advisor to the emperor," Shen Qingqiu snapped back. "Maybe you should look around before you make rash judgements." Shen Qingqiu gestured broadly around the room, letting the visual speak for itself. Every available surface was covered in flowers, jewelry, and fetch quest MacGuffins of all shapes and sizes. As contrary as Sha Yuan was, even he would have to admit; there was no space for more!

Sha Yuan surveyed the space, face darkening. Then he turned and dumped the flowers on Shen Qingqiu’s bed. “There’s space here,” Sha Yuan declared. "I've heard a truly skilled cultivator doesn't need to sleep. Perhaps you qualify. And anyway, these flowers are a gift from Junshang, more important than petty mortal needs."

The bed Luo Binghe had given Shen Qingqiu was so large that Shen Qingqiu could easily share it with a whole bush of peonies, and perhaps it was actually a plus that between Shen Qingqiu and the flowers, there was less space for another person. Maybe tonight Luo Binghe wouldn’t be able to sneak in and lie on Shen Qingqiu’s bed all dishabille, just in case Shen Qingqiu had changed his mind about fucking him between dinner and bedtime.

Yes, actually…

“Let’s do some consolidating,” Shen Qingqiu proposed. “Why don’t we move the flowers on the side table, the dresser, and the tea table? We can put all of them on the bed. I’m sure it’ll smell wonderful.”

Sha Yuan scowled, thwarted. Shen Qingqiu felt a rush of victory. So what if he was trapped in Luo Binghe’s palace in a world that wasn’t his, where he knew no one and no one liked him except for the obsessive all-powerful demon emperor after his ass. Shen Qingqiu could at least eke out a win against this idiot!

Sha Yuan was irritating like no one Shen Qingqiu had ever met, and never missed an opportunity to show Shen Qingqiu how much he loathed him. The petty remarks and witless criticisms were endless. Truly, was there anyone more obnoxious?

“You should be more respectful of Junshang’s gifts,” Sha Yuan’s bells tinkled with suppressed outrage.

Shen Qingqiu studied his nails. “You’re the one who decided placing them on the bed was appropriate,” he said coolly. “I’m only following your example.”

Sha Yuan turned red. “You don’t deserve any of this!” He pointed an angry finger at Shen Qingqiu. “You’re the scum villain! You deserve to be locked up in the dungeons and human sticked and castrated, after everything you’ve done to Luo Binghe, even if it wasn’t this Luo Binghe!”

When Shen Qingqiu transmigrated, he’d gained the thick face of the original goods. So he didn’t flinch in the face of Sha Yuan’s accusations, even if they did reflect some of his own thoughts. Hadn’t he once written in the forums, calling for Shen Qingqiu’s castration himself? And even if Shen Qingqiu hadn’t whipped his precious Luo Binghe, the one that had been his, at the Immortal Alliance Conference he’d still…

Shen Qingqiu drew a fan, one of the few gifts from Luo Binghe he deigned to use, and peered down at Sha Yuan over its gold-painted rim. “I think that’s for Luo Binghe to decide,” Shen Qingqiu said with a calm he didn’t feel.

Sha Yuan stomped his foot, making the bells around his ankle chime. “I don’t know what you’ve done to Junshang, but when I figure it out, you’re going to pay,” he threatened.

“What I’ve done to him?” Shen Qingqiu couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Sha Yuan had apparently been a grudging participant in the research and planning sessions where Luo Binghe had plotted to find the “perfect” Shen Qingqiu. And Shen Qingqiu knew Sha Yuan had been there when Luo Binghe had dragged a bedraggled Shen Qingqiu from his own world after nearly killing the Luo Binghe and Liu Qingge that had tried to stop him. What did Sha Yuan think Shen Qingqiu could have done? “Don’t be absurd.”

“How did you turn Luo Binghe gay?” Sha Yuan burst out. The question had clearly been weighing on him for some time.

“Luo Binghe isn’t gay,” Shen Qingqiu said automatically. Luo Binghe might have declared that he intended to marry Shen Qingqiu, might have made several seduction attempts with and without clothes on, might have slain a dragon or two in the name of wooing him. But Shen Qingqiu still just couldn’t accept the possibility of Luo Binghe being gay. This was just a temporary madness that would soon pass. Shen Qingqiu was almost certain of it.

“Yeah,” Sha Yuan calmed down a little. “Yes, he can’t be gay. That’s right.” Then Sha Yuan puffed up again. “So don’t try anything!”

At this Shen Qingqiu snapped his fan shut and tried to use it to whack Sha Yuan on his stupid head. “I’m not gay either!”

Sha Yuan dodged Shen Qingqiu’s fan easily, red silks flaring. “Even a straight man would be interested in Luo Binghe, though,” he continued to argue. Sha Yuan’s lip curled up, revealing a flash of fang. “So I’m warning you now. Don’t.”

What a moron.

Even if Luo Binghe was the pinnacle of manliness, someone you couldn’t help but admire, Shen Qingqiu wasn’t going to–to lust after him. Because Shen Qingqiu was straight. Although Shen Qingqiu might sometimes appreciate Luo Binghe’s strength and perseverance and character. And having seen Luo Binghe spread out on his bed, outer robes discarded, inner robes falling open to reveal broad, bare shoulders and a six-pack that–

“I’m not interested,” Shen Qingqiu strode out of the room, leaving Sha Yuan and all the flowers and too-fancy furniture behind.

Unfortunately, Sha Yuan quickly caught up.

Luo Binghe had worried that his harem might react poorly to Shen Qingqiu walking out and about amongst them. With qi-suppressing cuffs gracing his wrists, Shen Qingqiu was still helpless. And the Shen Qingqiu of Proud Immortal Demon Way had many enemies. Qiu Haitang was around here somewhere, and would probably stab him if she caught him in the hallway. So it was Sha Yuan’s responsibility to keep Shen Qingqiu safe whenever he decided to move about the palace.

“Where are you going?” Sha Yuan quickly began casting silencing and invisibility spells on them; easier to sneak about than fighting all the wives with a grudge against the Original Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Qingqiu considered his options. “The library,” he decided.

But they hadn’t even reached it before they came across Luo Binghe and Liu Mingyan, having a hushed conversation in a side alcove. Since Luo Binghe’s many wives competed for his attention in a variety of ways, the more artsy of them had created a great deal of Luo Binghe-themed decor. The alcoves along the hallway generally had things like statues of Luo Binghe, sitting astride a Black Moon Rhinocerous Python; paintings of Luo Binghe setting fire to Qing Jing; embroidered tapestries featuring Luo Binghe eradicating reticent and annoying demon clans.

The alcove Luo Binghe and Liu Mingyan were in was marginally more tasteful; there was a low table with a spray of blood-red flowers, and cushions embroidered with Luo Binghe’s heavenly demon mark. Shen Qingqiu squinted. There was onyx inlay on the table to look like Xin Mo. That actually was very nice; the sort of merchandise Shen Yuan would have loved to have in his apartment pre-transmigration.

Luo Binghe and Liu Mingyan paid it no mind at all, standing next to the table and nearly stepping on the cushions. They were standing close, as close as two lovers having a secretive tryst. Well! There was no need for secrets between the wedded couple, but as far as trysts went, that was exactly what these alcoves were for. Many a wife had been bedded in a dark corner overlooked by Luo Binghe’s serious, painted gaze. The semi-public nature of these hallway alcoves only added to the “public sex” kink, pleasing a swathe of readers even as Shen Qingqiu raged at the lack of romance.

Shen Qingqiu didn’t really think the demure Liu Mingyan would go for it in a hallway. She veiled her face constantly; was that the sort of woman who would fuck her husband in a place like this? Shen Qingqiu thought not. But perhaps they were exchanging sweet words, or tokens of affection? Either way, that was great!

Shen Qingqiu and Sha Yuan looked at each other and nodded, for once in perfect agreement: yes, let Luo Binghe be reminded of how amazing Liu Mingyan was, how superior she was as a bride over Shen Qingqiu!

So neither of them said a word, or dispelled the silencing and invisibility spells they wore. If Luo Binghe noticed them, he might say or do some attempted romancing of Shen Qingqiu, in front of Liu Mingyan! And then Liu Mingyan might well try to kill him, given her backstory. Best to stay utterly still, barely breathing, to try to remain unnoticed. Just until Luo Binghe and Liu Mingyan moved on.

Alas, romance seemed far from Luo Binghe’s mind. He didn’t seem happy with Liu Mingyan.

“How could you even look at her after what she helped him do?” Luo Binghe’s hushed voice was barely audible. Shen Qingqiu slid a little closer to hear better. This might be an important plot development, or give him some hints as to where he was in Luo Binghe’s timeline! His life might be at stake! And anyway, he was burning with curiosity.

Luo Binghe’s words were packed with frustration, anger, anguish–whoever the “him” was that Luo Binghe was speaking of, he was clearly a great enemy.

“She’s helping us now,” Liu Mingyan replied simply. Hm. Her voice was lower and more masculine than Shen Qingqiu remembered. She sounded a lot like her brother.

Luo Binghe snarled and punched the wall. Stone cracked and crumbled under his mighty fist. His eyes glowed a fierce red, and his demonic qi swirled and clung to him like a second skin. It was a fearsome sight, but the ever-courageous Liu Mingyan didn’t back down. She reached out to take Luo Binghe’s hand, and pressed the acupoint there.

“Your meridians are inflamed,” she declared, releasing his hand. “Using Xin Mo has unbalanced your qi again, and you’re making it worse by not keeping in control of your emotions. Calm yourself.”

“I am calm,” Luo Binghe gritted out as he raked at the hole in the wall he’d made, expanding it with jagged claw-marks. “I do not need to dual cultivate again. We need to find Shizun and go.”

Shen Qingqiu couldn’t help but groan. Shizun, shizun, shizun! Don’t say such things in front of Liu Mingyan! What is she going to think?!

Sha Yuan jabbed Shen Qingqiu in the ribs. Shen Qingqiu jabbed him back. They were under a silencing spell! A little noise was fine!

Liu Mingyan grabbed Luo Binghe by the shoulders and shoved him up against the wall with a thud. That shocked Luo Binghe out of his anger. He gaped at her, and some of the churning qi dissipated.

“You need to be in good condition to fight,” Liu Mingyan argued. “Will you continue this foolish behavior, or will you let me cleanse your core?”

A flush rose up in Luo Binghe’s cheeks. He squirmed against Liu Mingyan, but she pressed him into the wall with her whole body. Shen Qingqiu saw her hips thrust against Luo Binghe’s, and Luo Binghe let out a helpless moan.

“Do you feel that?” Liu Mingyan hissed. “That is from Xin Mo’s yin energies corrupting yours. It is not wrong to accept help when you need it.”

Liu Mingyan must have been cycling her qi to help cleanse Luo Binghe’s meridians. It required certain… intimate parts to be in close contact. She must have been very skilled to make it work through their layers of clothing. Of course she was! She was one of the foremost wives in Luo Binghe’s harem!

Shen Qingqiu hadn’t thought she would go so far, here in the hallway where anyone might pass by. Maybe she thought she couldn’t convince Luo Binghe to go back to her rooms. So dedicated, so caring, truly her love for Luo Binghe ran deep. Shen Qingqiu couldn’t see her face behind the veil, but he was certain it would have shown the purest love.

It was funny. Shen Qingqiu had spent so long waiting for Liu Mingyan and Luo Binghe to court, in his world. Seeing the end result here and now, he felt all the more justified in it. Look at the two of them together! Look at how well suited they were! Look how Liu Mingyan’s strong, broad shoulders matched Luo Binghe’s, the way the strength of her arms was enough to subdue Luo Binghe into accepting the help he clearly needed. Liu Mingyan’s skirts shifted so she could slide a leg between Luo Binghe’s thighs to force his stance wider, and Shen Qingqiu shifted in turn. It was really warm in here.

Luo Binghe panted hard, his eyes glassy, as Liu Mingyan continued to send more qi into him. Her veil fluttered against Luo Binghe’s skin as she breathed steadily in and out, the deep breaths of someone doing fine qi control to cycle another’s qi.

Shen Qingqiu recalled how it felt when Liu Qingge cleansed his meridians of Without-a-Cure in the Bamboo House. How different would it have felt if it had been his cock Liu Qingge held, when he channeled qi through to clear Shen Qingqiu’s blockages? The way Liu Qingge’s qi surged in him, filling him with yang qi that battered at his defenses and made his wrist pulse with sensation–it was unforgettable.

Whenever Liu Qingge had done that for Shen Qingqiu, all Shen Qingqiu had been able to do was relax and take it. That was the best way to enjoy endure Liu Qingge’s less-than-careful ministrations.

Luo Binghe was far more stubborn than Shen Qingqiu. When the cycling qi began to ebb, the glassy look faded and rage twisted Luo Binghe’s face. He shoved Liu Mingyan back.

“You think I’m too angry? That I’m losing control?” Luo Binghe snapped, fists bunching in Liu Mingyan’s hanfu and threatening to tear apart the delicate silk. “Maybe I am a mad beast. Are you planning to put me down when we’re done here?”

Liu Mingyan’s eyes were angry above her veil, and Shen Qingqiu could practically see the furious scowl that would lie beneath. “You’re acting like one!” She spat. “Don’t be a fool. Let me help you.”

Luo Binghe sneered. “So eager to defile yourself touching this filthy demon.”

…Yikes.

So maybe Luo Binghe and Liu Mingyan’s relationship was more complicated than he realized. And what was with all this self-hatred anti-demon rhetoric Luo Binghe was spouting? Luo Binghe shouldn’t talk like that! He was the best of the best, the pinnacle of manhood! And maybe in the early years he’d been easily wounded, a little sensitive–hadn’t Shen Qingqiu seen that in his own little sheep Luo Binghe that he’d raised? But once Luo Binghe had conquered the realms and laid waste to his enemies, he shouldn’t be thinking like that! Shouldn’t be sensitive, or vulnerable, or self-hating…

But Luo Binghe looked completely serious.

Shen Qingqiu sent up a prayer that, wherever he was, his Binghe didn’t think of himself this way.

Liu Mingyan batted away Luo Binghe’s hands and undid the ties on his belt, flinging his robes open. Shen Qingqiu spotted a set of washboard abs; impossibly lustrous in the lamplight. Liu Mingyan’s fingers traced over Luo Binghe’s bared skin. Her fingertips grazed a dusky nipple, and Luo Binghe’s back arched into her hand. The clothed bulge of the heavenly pillar twitched, and Liu Mingyan reached down to pull Luo Binghe’s waistband slowly down.

Luo Binghe’s hands on her chest flexed, and he tugged the neckline of her robes apart. His hands went to her chest to grope her breasts. They were unusually flat for a woman written by Airplane-Shooting-in-the-Sky, almost masculine. But Shen Qingqiu’s breath caught at the sight of the two of them, touching each other, pressed against each other, lost to the world. He realized his own cock was achingly hard; he hoped he wasn’t leaking precome, since if Sha Yuan spotted that, he would never let Shen Qingqiu live that down. Shen Qingqiu sent a quick glance at Sha Yuan. Sha Yuan's mouth was a little agape, his eyes wide, and he was clearly totally astounded by the scene before them. Great! And it definitely was a riveting scene, so hopefully Sha Yuan wouldn't notice Shen Qingqiu's… reactions to it.

But it was normal and expected to get hard while watching the most handsome, amazing man in the world, and the best of his wives! Sure, Shen Qingqiu had never been affected this way while reading Proud Immortal Demon Way, despite what all his detractors in the forum claimed. But in person, watching this very intimate meridian cleansing session… It was all Airplane’s fault, that pragmatic things like this ended up being so sexual. Airplane had turned a xianxia trope into pornography. And Shen Qingqiu was basically watching heterosexual pornography right now, which was a typical red-blooded male thing to do. How could he help but get turned on?

Liu Mingyan was palming Luo Binghe’s cock now, rubbing its tip, her strong fingers grasping the shaft and tugging so that the foreskin pulled back and the glans was exposed. It was damp and shiny with precome. Liu Mingyan’s thumb came up to wipe it away, and a single clinging strand fought to linger, connecting them with the most delicate of threads.

Luo Binghe moaned, and then bit his lip to cut off the noise as though he regretted making those sounds. Shen Qingqiu pressed his own lips together to keep down any humiliating noises of his own.

“You are being affected,” Liu Mingyan said. “I swear I will only do what is necessary for the plan’s success.”

Liu Mingyan rucked up her skirts and revealed–

Revealed–

Liu Mingyan had a cock?

Why did Liu Mingyan have a cock?!

Was that why Airplane never wrote her any sex scenes?!

Shen Qingqiu glanced at Sha Yuan. Was he seeing this? But Sha Yuan looked away from Shen Qingqiu as soon as he caught Shen Qingqiu looking. His ears were as red as his gauzy robes. He didn’t say anything, though, and there were no exclamations of shock. Luo Binghe himself certainly didn’t seem surprised, just totally overwhelmed with pleasure and need. So… this must still be normal, then?

“Direct your qi to your lower dantian,” Liu Mingyan commanded in a low voice that was almost hypnotic. Luo Binghe tried to nose past her veil and bite her neck, wild and feral and demonic in his lust, but she slapped his cheek. “Focus!”

Instead, Luo Binghe’s hands came up and yanked at her hair. Delicate silver pins fell tinkling to the ground, and Liu Mingyan’s hair cascaded down with it as well. Dark locks tumbled around Luo Binghe’s fingers, covering her shoulders, and creating a second veil to hide their faces away.

Shen Qingqiu saw Luo Binghe’s fingers weave through and then yank, and Liu Mingyan’s head was tipped back to expose her pale and slender neck.

“You!” Liu Mingyan struggled, but Luo Binghe was already attacking her throat. Though his fangs could rend the flesh easily, he was sucking instead. The wet smack of it was loud in Shen Qingqiu’s ears. As loud as his own pounding heart.

Liu Mingyan’s skin reddened around Luo Binghe’s mouth, and she let out a low moan. “A-ah,” she whimpered helplessly as Luo Binghe pulled her hair to drag her head back more. The glow of the qi transfer flickered as her qi sputtered. “Stop that, it’s distracting!”

Luo Binghe lifted his lips from her neck, revealing a dark red patch well on the way to bruising. “Make me,” he murmured into her skin.

Liu Mingyan shuddered again, and Luo Binghe took her by the waist and flung her onto the table. It thumped and shook as he climbed atop it, stripping away his robes and tossing them aside. Liu Mingyan’s knees went up and her skirts swirled around her waist, exposing everything beneath to Luo Binghe. Her head lolled to one side, and Shen Qingqiu couldn’t tear his eyes from that vivid red claiming mark Luo Binghe had left. What would it feel like, to receive such a thing from Luo Binghe? How good, how heady the sensation? Would Shen Qingqiu be so overwhelmed, if it were him there?

“If you want me to stop, make me stop,” Luo Binghe said, nudging Liu Mingyan’s knees further up and apart.

Liu Mingyan’s veil was so dampened with drool now that it was plastered to her face. Shen Qingqiu could see the clear outline of parted lips as Liu Mingyan panted, staring fixedly at Luo Binghe’s cock.

There was a wet sound as Luo Binghe rubbed Liu Mingyan’s cock, the slick of her precome making his strokes a smooth glide. “So eager to fuck a demon,” Luo Binghe hummed. “And eager to submit.”

Luo Binghe’s other hand slipped between Liu Mingyan’s legs, out of sight. And then Liu Mingyan arched off the table, skirts swishing with the movement, a helpless cry erupting from her lips.

“In this world, I am the emperor and you are my wife,” Luo Binghe continued, his arms still in ceaseless motion, muscles in his forearms jumping as he toyed with Liu Mingyan. “Why don’t you open up for your husband, show him how much you want this beast’s cock?” Luo Binghe’s lips took on a vicious twist, and the words dripped with venom.

Liu Mingyan’s chest heaved, and then her legs came up to wrap around Luo Binghe’s waist, her arms went to his, and in a flurry of motion she had flipped them over and reversed their positions. She perched atop Luo Binghe’s naked form, her skirts the only cover for them both.

Liu Mingyan leaned down until her veil grazed Luo Binghe’s chin. “You let every petty thought that crosses your mind take hold,” she panted. Her hips were gently thrusting against him, rubbing them together beneath her skirts, but she didn’t even seem to notice. She was too busy scolding Luo Binghe. Luo Binghe! How could she do such a thing, with him laid out before her like that?

Liu Mingyan was too stubborn to let even the appeal of Luo Binghe distract her from her lecture. “You nurture the anger that invites Xin Mo’s influence in. That sword is dangerous, and you let it rule you! You–”

Luo Binghe cut her off. “Fuck it out of me, then!” He was almost shouting. “That’s what you’re here for, isn’t it? You’re useless otherwise! If not for me, you’d still be stuck waiting in Cang Qiong for someone who’d never return!”

Liu Mingyan blazed with fierce courage, undaunted, unmoved. “Luo Binghe! You will let me cleanse your meridians. You will cycle your qi with mine until every last scrap of Xin Mo’s yin energy is gone. Starting now!” And she made a pointed thrust with her hips.

Shen Qingqiu wanted so badly to see what was happening beneath the skirts, to see Liu Mingyan’s pleasure beneath her veil. The two cocks, rubbing together, the precome and sweat mixing and making everything slick. The building heat between their bodies. The smell of sex and lust surely rising between them.

But even without being able to see that, Shen Qingqiu could see their bodies shifting against each other, hear the rustle of fabric. Luo Binghe let out helpless little moans, and Liu Mingyan panted as she moved.

“Do you–feel the tainted energy, in your core?” Liu Mingyan gasped out between thrusts. “Take the yang qi I am feeding you, and–yes. Yes, yes, don’t stop, good…” She trailed off, her movements becoming less rhythmic and more ragged. “A-ah, I…”

Beneath her, Luo Binghe shuddered. “I–I–” his hands grasped her waist, pulling her down and against him as he made a few last powerful thrusts against her. Then he gasped, and sagged, going limp on the table. A few stray curls clung to his face, and his skin shone with sweat, but his expression finally eased. A darkness had gone out of it, leaving behind something that was purely Luo Binghe.

Both Liu Mingyan and Luo Binghe were quiet as they briskly stood and fixed their clothes. Liu Mingyan kept her face turned away from Luo Binghe as he dressed. But then Luo Binghe spoke up.

“How can you stand it?” His voice quavered, just once, just a little. He sounded so much like Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe, his precious disciple, that Shen Qingqiu wanted to reach out and hug him right there and then. “Doesn’t it disgust you? Doing this with a filthy demon?”

Shen Qingqiu knew his Binghe’s tells, and apparently the Original Luo Binghe had some of the same. There was a desperation in his voice, a shine in Luo Binghe’s eyes. The question meant too much to him, and Luo Binghe was scared of what the answer might be.

Liu Mingyan turned to Luo Binghe, and her eyes were just like Liu Qingge's, solemn and beautiful. Shen Qingqiu’s heart tore as a longing to see Liu Qingge, and his Luo Binghe, rushed through him. What he wouldn’t give for it to be Liu Qingge and his Binghe standing before him now…

Liu Mingyan leaned in, resting her forehead against Luo Binghe’s zuiyin. “I was wrong before,” she said softly. “You have been a good partner in our search. And even when I was trying to kill you, you saved my life. You’re no beast.”

A tear dripped from Luo Binghe’s eye, running down the curve of his cheek. It hung from his chin, then fell to the collar of his robes and vanished in the darkness there.

“That’s it?” Luo Binghe said, sounding almost bewildered. “That’s all it takes?”

“Mn,” Liu Mingyan said, then pulled away. “That’s it. No more distractions. Now, we find him, and we fight.”

Luo Binghe caught her hand, his face going strange. Then Luo Binghe went blank, the unnameable feelings evaporating like the morning mist, leaving nothing behind. He released her.

Liu Mingyan stepped away.

“Can you sense him with your blood?” She asked.

Luo Binghe’s brow furrowed. “Not amongst all the others, I think, but maybe if I try…”

Luo Binghe was going to use his blood parasites to find someone? Shen Qingqiu grabbed Sha Yuan’s arm urgently. Sha Yuan looked back at him with the same panic. They couldn't get caught here after seeing something like that!

They quickly and quietly shuffled out of earshot of Luo Binghe and Liu Mingyan, and then both of them bolted down the hallway back to Shen Qingqiu’s rooms. Neither of them had left all day, no sirree! They definitely hadn’t been standing there watching Luo Binghe get down and dirty with Liu Mingyan!

Turn left at the sculpture of Luo Binghe smiting the Western Demon King, right at the romance-novel style painting of him holding the Chalice of Ever-Healing… their feet pounding on stone was too loud, too loud! But they had to move fast!

Shen Qingqiu prayed fervently that they’d get far enough away before Luo Binghe sensed them. There was a little time delay when he tried to use them, right? That dramatic pause as he cast his senses out, lots of flowery description of qi and heartbeats and life, blah blah blah, Airplane had practically copy-pasted it every time so Shen Qingqiu was fairly certain.

Shen Qingqiu wasn’t sure what Luo Binghe would do if he knew what Shen Qingqiu had seen, and how Shen Qingqiu had felt about it. It had been arousing, no doubt about it! Shen Qingqiu’s cock was still achingly hard, and the panic he was feeling now was barely making a dent in his sudden aching need!

But Shen Qingqiu didn’t want Liu Mingyan, or the Original Luo Binghe, no matter how hot they were! He wanted…

Well, Shen Qingqiu didn’t think he wanted anyone, but if he had to choose…

His mind, because of recent events only, went to Liu Qingge and his Binghe. He thought of a hot summer day, a cloudless sky with the sun beating down on them. At the training grounds of Bai Zhan, Liu Qingge would already have worked up a sweat, the sheen of it on him matted by the dust of the training yard. And Luo Binghe, fresh and ready, would challenge him; Luo Binghe was always so eager to show Shen Qingqiu what he was capable of.

Luo Binghe and Liu Qingge would fight, at first a refined match with swords. But even after they’d disarmed one another, they’d keep going, wrestling and trying to pin the other and force submission. Maybe as they overheated, they’d strip off their robes. And Shen Qingqiu would watch, and call out tips.

And then–then, things might grow more heated. Thoughts of the scene Shen Qingqu had just witnessed made their way into his thoughts, invasive and inescapable as Broadleaf Viridian Kudzu Vines. Liu Qingge, rutting into Luo Binghe as he laid there moaning. Luo Binghe could throw him off. Luo Binghe was the strong, powerful, undefeatable protagonist. But it would feel so good that Luo Binghe couldn’t help but let it happen, even there where anyone could see. Even there while Shen Qingqiu watched.

And since it was his Liu Qingge and his Luo Binghe, Shen Qingqiu would step into the ring, and wrap his arms around Liu Qingge, and press kisses to his ear as he thrust into them both, feeling the way Liu Qingge moved into Luo Binghe in response, bringing all three of them pleasure at once. Rutting into them, over and over, watching Luo Binghe’s ecstasy and feeling the vibrations of Liu Qingge’s moans in his chest, bringing them over the edge together.

Shen Qingqiu shook his head, then slapped both his cheeks.

“What the fuck…?” Sha Yuan paused in unlocking the door to Shen Qingqiu's rooms to stare at Shen Qingqiu like he was insane.

“Nothing! Nothing at all!” Shen Qingqiu stepped through the door into his opulently cluttered rooms, Sha Yuan following behind him.

Well. Well! It was really hot in here. Shen Qingqiu drew his fan and flapped it vigorously. Sha Yuan was also very red. Shen Qingqiu fanning himself was a reasonable act, and not a dead giveaway that Shen Qingqiu was now having weird fantasies about his purely platonic shidi and his sweet murderous ex-disciple.

It didn’t matter anyway. They were an entire universe away, so nothing would ever come of any idle musings he had. Not that they were going to continue!

Shen Qingqiu needed to focus on his life here, and how he was going to survive!

Chapter Text

Luo Binghe rose up from the pile of flowers on the bed like a kraken from the deep.

“You–” Shen Qingqiu began, and then the words he meant to say–what are you doing in my bed, again, weren’t you in the hallway just a moment ago, how did you get here so fast–all died in his throat.

Under all the bright petals, Luo Binghe wasn’t wearing a single scrap of clothing.

Beside Shen Qingqiu, Sha Yuan was squeaking faintly.

“Junshang!” Sha Yuan covered his face with his hands, and Shen Qingqiu could see the red creep across his face all the way to his ears. Shen Qingqiu would have seized the opportunity to mock Sha Yuan for it, except that he himself wasn’t doing much better.

“Where are your robes?! Cover up!” Shen Qingqiu exclaimed, shielding his own face with the much more effective barrier of an elegant fan. So useful and multipurpose, Sha Yuan, take note! You’ll need something like this when serving a master this shameless!

Luo Binghe just continued to lounge insouciantly on the green bedspread. With one hand he grabbed a handful of pink chrysanthemums, and tossed it across his bare pelvis. They didn’t cover the heavenly pillar; they framed it like an obscene shoujo manga panel spread.

“How’s this?” Luo Binghe said smugly, fingers idly tracing his collarbone and dipping down to brush his–

Shen Qingqiu jerked his head away. “Why are you here, like this, doing this? Go to one of your wives if you need–help!”

Luo Binghe had literally just fucked Liu Mingyan, and wow the heavenly pillar was completely hard again already! What a refractory period the stallion protagonist had! Shen Qingqiu would applaud in admiration if his ass wasn’t next on the docket.

Luo Binghe sat up, and a look of delight crossed his face. “Are you jealous?” A broad grin turned his face almost boyish, and he looked suddenly like Shen Qingqiu’s little white lotus, eager to welcome Shen Qingqiu home and show his Shizun the sweets he’d made.

“Who’s jealous?” Shen Qingqiu turned away and raised his fan even higher. There was a twisty ball of emotions raging in his chest, but one thing was for sure, it wasn’t jealousy! Who was there to be jealous of? Why should he be jealous? Pah!

“You don’t have to be jealous,” Luo Binghe jumped off the bed and strode over to Shen Qingqiu. The massive heavenly pillar bobbed with every step, improbably defying gravity. Flowers fell at his feet, and there was. So much skin. All on display. “I want you the most of all. You can be my first wife.”

Luo Binghe took Shen Qingqiu’s hand that was holding the fan, and tugged it gently down. He clasped it against his bare, naked, glistening chest. There was a stray petal hanging precariously on one nipple; a stray breeze might dislodge it.

Shen Qingqiu felt the hair on the back of his neck prickle. There was a laser beam of hatred burning him right between the shoulder blades.

Sha Yuan! Does it look like this master is trying to seduce your lord?! Luo Binghe is the seducer!

…Not that Shen Qingqiu was being seduced!

The door slammed open. Shen Qingqiu jolted, toppling right into Luo Binghe’s arms. His hands came up to push against Luo Binghe’s chest–wow, his skin was soft.

“Shizun! We’re here to–” The Luo Binghe of Shen Qingqiu’s world, his Binghe, stood in the doorway. “Shizun, why is he naked?” Binghe’s voice rose into a whine, and sparkling tears welled up in his eyes.

Behind him, Liu Mingyan snapped, “Luo Binghe! Do not get distracted!” And… drew… Cheng Luan…

Shen Qingqiu blinked down at Original Binghe, whose naked body gleamed in the light. Shen Qingqiu couldn’t see the heavenly pillar right now, but oh, he could definitely feel it. It pulsed against him like someone knocking at the door, trying to be let in.

Shen Qingqiu stared at Liu Qingge, who looked prettier than ever in the dress he’d borrowed from his sister. Liu Qingge, whose neck showed the reddening beginnings of a bruise where Binghe had marked and claimed him.

Shen Qingqiu then looked at his Binghe, whose robes were rumpled because he had been fornicating with Liu Qingge in the hall. Full! Frontal! Frottage!!

“Is everyone gay?!” Shen Qingqiu couldn’t help it. It just slipped out. But in his defense: what the fuck?

“I’m not,” Sha Yuan said quickly.

Silence followed.

No one else was arguing the label.

“I’ve been courting you for years,” Liu Qingge proclaimed.

“You have not,” Shen Qingqiu argued. He would have noticed!

“You must not have been very good,” Original Binghe sneered.

“I was sabotaging him,” Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe admitted.

Liu Qingge elbowed him. “That doesn’t matter now! Shen Qingqiu, come here.”

Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe was gay. Liu Qingge was gay. The two were well-matched, if one set aside the fact that they were both men. Liu Qingge was as beautiful as a woman, and a war god to match Luo Binghe’s strength. Their characters slotted together like–like–

Like their bodies had, moments before.

Luo Binghe had romance, fulfilled in Liu Qingge. And Shen Qingqiu could be happy for them. He was a good partner, better than Shen Qingqiu could have arranged for Luo Binghe. Better than all the women in the world.

The two themes of Proud Immortal Demon Way were love and hate. Romance and revenge.

Luo Binghe’s wives always helped him achieve the latter. That was the role they had to play.

Shen Qingqiu didn’t move.

His ass or his limbs, were those his choices?! Fuck this, and fuck his life!

“He wants to stay with me!” Original Binghe’s arms tightened around Shen Qingqiu, pressing him even more firmly against those impressive pecs (no homo, just facts). “He’s my lover now. You can go.”

“No,” Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe answered. “I’m not leaving without Shizun!”

“You can’t have him!” Original Binghe shoved Shen Qingqiu back, and he found himself restrained by Sha Yuan instead. He watched, helpless, as Original Binghe dove for the bed and destroyed the remaining flower-pile by pulling out Xin Mo. Then, heavenly pillar and demonic sword swinging, he went on the attack.

“Don’t jump in,” Sha Yuan advised. “Right now it’s a standard wife rescue plot, but if you join the fight it’ll be the 'love interest tragically slain in battle’ trope. Junshang would be sad, we’d have to do the holy mausoleum, it’ll be a whole thing. And I’d rather just stay home.”

“I can’t just watch,” Shen Qingqiu said, although admittedly he wasn’t sure what he could do here. The idiot henchman was right. In a clash involving two protagonists and the War God of Cang Qiong, Shen Qingqiu would be dead meat if he tried to intervene. Never mind that he wasn’t even certain whose side he should be on!

Sha Yuan rolled his eyes. “Cliche,” he muttered under his breath. “Zero IQ on top of tsundere. What does Junshang see in you?”

Shen Qingqiu couldn't tear his eyes away from the sight of his Binghe and Liu Qingge working together to pin Original Binghe to the floor. The wrestling was causing a lot of their clothing to shred. Liu Qingge’s hanfu was slashed all down the front, the ragged remnants of his skirts tangling. His Binghe’s belt had given up and let his robes all fall down. The heavenly pillar peeked out of one of the bigger holes in his pants.

Original Binghe was, of course, still naked.

“Huh?” Shen Qingqiu mumbled. Had Sha Yuan said something?

Liu Qingge yanked Xin Mo from Original Binghe's grip and sent it skittering across the room. But then Original Binghe bucked up. His legs caught Liu Qingge around the neck, trapping his head between muscular thighs. Liu Qingge red-faced, struggled to free himself. But he had nowhere safe to put his hands. Eventually he planted them on Original Binghe’s hips, fingertips digging into that plush ass to try to pull it away as the heavenly pillar laid blow after blow upon Liu Qingge’s cheeks.

Taking advantage of Original Binghe's distraction, Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe seized Original Binghe’s arms and drew out a set of fuzzy handcuffs. Shen Qingqiu squinted. Were those the Antique Bracers of Divine Might? Used to nerf ultra powerful demon femme fatales so that Luo Binghe could sexily dom them while they were rendered completely helpless? Ah, but Luo Binghe was a cultivator of unparalleled power, so he could still dominate a fight even with those on. That was the benefit of being half-heavenly demon, half cultivator!

Except that Original Binghe was fighting someone who was exactly the same. Plus a powerful immortal cultivator who he’d never come up against, because Airplane-Shooting-in-the-Sky had killed him off as part of Liu Mingyan’s tragic backstory.

“Junshang!” Sha Yuan gasped as the Antique Bracers of Divine Might clicked into place around Original Binghe’s wrists.

Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe pressed his advantage, climbing atop Original Binghe to pry his knees apart and help Liu Qingge get free. Liu Qingge slipped out with a heaving gasp, and Shen Qingqiu spotted a coil of red rope around Original Binghe’s ankle. Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe held Original Binghe down as Liu Qingge looped more of the Immortal Binding Cable around the other flailing leg, and pulled it tight, trussing Original Binghe up and rendering him utterly powerless.

Sha Yuan made as if he wanted to jump in and save Original Binghe. Shen Qingqiu grabbed his arm and held him back this time.

“If you think it’s too dangerous for me, what about yourself?” Shen Qingqiu hissed. “You’re barely a step up from cannon fodder, do you want to be a red shirt?!”

Sha Yuan sent him a wide-eyed glance, and then went back to staring at Original Binghe lying there on the floor.

It really was an undignified position for the emperor of the three realms, master of the harem of a thousand flowers, stallion protagonist of Proud Immortal Demon Way. He looked… so pitiful, lying there.

“No!” Original Binghe shouted. “No, I can’t accept this! You can’t have him! Shizun! Shizun, you can’t leave me!” He wriggled and struggled like a worm on a hook, unable to stop anything. Unable to save anyone, even himself.

Liu Qingge rose to his feet, and then helped Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe up too. “Shen Qingqiu, I don’t know what he’s told you,” Liu Qingge said. “But he killed this universe’s Shen Qingqiu. Tortured him to death. He is a mad dog that doesn’t even deserve your pity! If you stay, he will hurt you. Come home to us.” Liu Qingge held out a reaching hand.

Liu Qingge’s hand was familiar. The same hand he always offered Shen Qingqiu, when they were going to fly on Cheng Luan together. The same hand he used to clasp Shen Qingqiu’s pulse point during their meridian cleansing sessions.

The same hand that Shen Qingqiu had held when Liu Qingge had found him at the sword mound, and Shen Qingqiu had needed an anchor in a world that was spinning too fast. It was a hand that was warm and strong. Rough with a swordsman’s callouses. But gentle, always gentle, with Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Qingqiu had destroyed his Binghe by pushing his white lotus disciple into the Abyss. The vengeful protagonist should have been all that remained.

But Liu Qingge was Liu Qingge. He wouldn’t deceive Shen Qingqiu for the purpose of maiming him. Wives of Luo Binghe sometimes lost all loyalty, all sense, all character, when they were seduced to Luo Binghe’s side. But this was Liu Qingge.

He wouldn’t hurt Shen Qingqiu.

And if he was helping Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe, if he was with Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe, then… that Binghe wouldn’t hurt him, either.

Shen Qingqiu reached out and took his hand. Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe watched, eyes glittering with hope. At their feet, Original Binghe let out a wordless moan of despair.

“I’m sorry, but I’m going home with them,” Shen Qingqiu said quietly. “This isn’t my world.”

“Theirs isn’t, either.”

Sha Yuan hadn’t moved. Hadn’t gone to help his Junshang, hadn’t tried to stop Shen Qingqu. He stood there, hands clenched into fists, calling out with that loud, clear voice.

“Their world isn’t your world, either!” Sha Yuan repeated.

“Of course it is!” Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe spat. “Your master took him from us. Are you trying to pretend he didn’t kill his Shizun, then come to steal mine?”

Sha Yuan shook his head. “That’s not what I’m saying,” he said. He looked at Shen Qingqiu. “You’re not Shen Qingqiu, are you. That’s what’s different about you, that’s why none of the other Shen Qingqius were right. What’s your real name?”

Shen Qingqiu flinched. It was a small movement, barely perceptible.

Liu Qingge and Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe both noticed. They tensed, hands going to their swords.

“Shizun?” Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe’s voice quavered.

“It doesn’t matter now,” Shen Qingqiu said quietly. It was an admission of guilt, he knew. But then, didn’t Luo Binghe, both of them, deserve to know?

“When did you transmigrate?” Sha Yuan’s eyes narrowed in thought. “After the Abyss? No, your Binghe cares about you too much. He’d want to human stick you, if you only came in after the Immortal Alliance Conference. But then why would you push him? Were you a Luo Binghe hater, one of the brainless trolls that rooted for the scum villain instead?”

A sudden fury surged up in Shen Qingqiu, turning his vision red. “Fuck you,” he snapped. “Saying such things, you obviously never had a System breathing down your neck. You don’t get to judge me!”

It was so dead silent in the room, it was as though everyone else had stopped breathing. Shen Qingqiu’s anger bloomed to fill the void. The System was gone now, corrupted by whatever the Original Binghe had done bringing him here, but Shen Qingqiu had to live with the consequences of what it had done to him every day. He’d have to live with what he’d done to his Binghe for the rest of his life.

“OOC this, OOC that,” Shen Qingqiu felt something within his chest swelling up. Fuck all of it. He didn’t care anymore what the consequences were. Anything might happen, but Shen Qingqiu was done with all this bullshit. “It made me keep the story on track even if that story ended in my painful torture and death! I had to do it, I had to push him, or it was going to kill–” Shen Qingqiu stopped talking so fast he almost bit his tongue. Pathetic. Pathetic! To say such things, how ridiculous and embarrassing.

His eyes burned and his chest ached.

“Then… then you care about Junshang,” Sha Yuan rallied. “You know who he is. You know he’s amazing!” Sha Yuan’s hands clenched into fists and his whole body trembled, bells chiming with the small, constant movement. “And he wants you! How can you think of leaving? When someone like Binghe wants you, you don’t turn away! Who wouldn’t want him?!”

Shen Qingqiu looked back at his fellow transmigrator. “He’s not my Binghe,” Shen Qingqiu explained gently.

Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe crept closer, until he stood so close Shen Qingqiu’s hands brushed the fabric of his robes.

Binghe. Shen Qingqiu had so deeply wronged him, torn wounds in his spirit that would never heal. But out of love for Liu Qingge, Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe had set aside his plans of revenge and come to save him and bring him home.

Shen Qingqiu’s weak, stupid heart fluttered in gratitude. To have his Binghe still care, still help, still be willing to even speak to Shen Qingqiu, was more than he deserved after what he’d done.

“My Binghe is not the same as yours,” Shen Qingqiu explained. “He knows me. If he wanted to make me happy, he’d bring me tea and lotus mooncakes, not flowers.” Shen Qingqiu thought of all the times Luo Binghe had done just that. The cakes took hours to make, so they were reserved for special occasions only. But Luo Binghe had sometimes deemed things as mundane as “the first flower of spring” or “successfully painted with a new technique” as special occasions, just to have a reason to make what he knew was one of Shen Qingqiu’s favorite treats.

Shen Qingqiu swallowed past the lump in his throat, and continued more bluntly than he intended, “If it was my Binghe intending to seduce me, I’d be in that bed with him! I couldn’t refuse him–and it wouldn’t be just because he wanted it, and I couldn't refuse. It would be… it would be…” It would be because I wanted to be there with him.

The words caught. Shen Qingqiu felt his face grow hot as he realized what he’d almost said.

What he had said was already far too much.

“Shizun,” Luo Binghe whispered reverently.

“Never mind that,” Shen Qingqiu said quickly, raising his fan. Please, forget this teacher ever said such a thing! Really, Shen Qingqiu didn’t know what had come over him. What he’d seen in the hallway–what he’d seen of his Binghe and Liu Qingge–was clearly messing with his head.

Sha Yuan still looked baffled. How difficult was it to understand? The original Luo Binghe was incredible, amazing, everything Shen Qingqiu had ever imagined. Except for being gay. But Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe… this was the child he had raised, the boy he had loved, and the man he admired all rolled into one.

“You’re from my world too,” Shen Qingqiu couldn’t believe he’d missed it. In hindsight, it was obvious. “Come with us.”

Original Binghe had been struggling and growling in Liu Qingge’s grip, but at this he went perfectly still and quiet. His face drained of all color. Having a minion with some secret plot knowledge must have been convenient for him, and to lose Sha Yuan might be hard. But Shen Qingqiu knew that Luo Binghe would be fine without him; didn’t the entire storyline of Proud Immortal Demon Way say so?

“There’s another one like us, in my world,” Shen Qingqiu continued. Best not to mention that it was Airplane-Shooting-in-the-Sky, that was probably not a selling point even if Sha Yuan was still a fan of the story after living it. “We’d take care of you. If you stay here, you know you’ll die before long.”

Sha Yuan looked away sharply. Yes, he knew the tropes as well as Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Qingqiu said it anyway. “You’re the overworked, overlooked loyal minion,” Shen Qingqiu laid out the brutal truth right there before them all. “You have no protection from the plot. Your Binghe doesn’t really care about you, and he won’t save you, not like one of his wives. You don’t have a halo. You’ll die from harem drama, or some realm-breaking catastrophe, or just get in the way when someone tries to challenge your emperor. And you’ll die fast, unmourned, just to show how serious things are–and then be forgotten before your body is cold.”

If Original Binghe had been still before, he now looked like he’d stopped breathing. His eyes were wide and wild, fixed on Sha Yuan. Sha Yuan wouldn’t look at him.

Original Binghe suddenly burst into motion, elbowing Liu Qingge in the gut and then scrambling free. “You! You were–you think–” he gasped raggedly. He took a lurching step towards Sha Yuan.

Original Binghe tried to grab Sha Yuan with his bound hands. But Liu Qingge grabbed him and pushed him up against the wall, smashing his cheek against the wood paneling.

“Then go!” Original Binghe shouted. “I don’t need you. I don’t need any of you!” He kicked backwards at Liu Qingge, but with his qi bound the strikes were nothing. “You can all get lost!”

“I’m staying,” Sha Yuan said. He curled in on himself, the bells on his wrists tinkling gently with the movement. “I know you’re right. But he’s my Junshang.” Sha Yuan looked up, and Shen Qingqiu recognized the determination in his eyes. It was a mirror of his own. “I’m staying with him.”

Well. All along, Shen Qingqiu had thought Sha Yuan was an stubborn moron, so this wasn't really unexpected. But there was something about Sha Yuan's completely idiotic suicidal loyalty that Shen Qingqiu found he could respect, too.

“Then you take him,” Liu Qingge said, and tossed Original Binghe at Sha Yuan.

Sha Yuan caught him deftly in his arms, almost like an embrace. Original Binghe raised his shaky, bound hands to Sha Yuan’s face.

In Proud Immortal Demon Way, Luo Binghe had cried many times in his childhood. When people showed cruelty to him in Qing Jing Peak, he had been soft, and vulnerable, and had not been able to help his tears. But the betrayal of his teacher at the Immortal Alliance Conference had been the end of such things. The trials of the Endless Abyss had hardened him into someone that never showed weakness, never flagged, never gave up.

Never cried.

Tears ran down Original Binghe's cheeks now.

“Junshang!” Sha Yuan said, clearly panicking about it. What did one do, when their boss started crying on them? Or perhaps he just didn’t know how to handle his armful of naked emperor.

Shen Qingqiu watched them with bemusement. Perhaps Sha Yuan was more than an overlooked henchman after all. Perhaps if the Original Binghe was willing to look out for him, Sha Yuan would survive here. Either way, this was what Sha Yuan chose. Shen Qingqiu could understand.

Shen Qingqiu nodded coolly and turned away. Shen Qingqiu’s Binghe drew Xin Mo and cut open a portal.

“What was your handle, though?” Sha Yuan called out as the portal began to expand. “Did I know you?”

Shen Qingqiu chuckled. Ah, they probably had been the bitterest of enemies on the forums! With Sha Yuan’s awful personality, it was certain they’d butted heads at least once. Even if their opinions were reasonably aligned on the matter of Luo Binghe.

“Peerless Cucumber,” Shen Qingqiu called over his shoulder. The portal home was calling. It tried to snatch the words from his lips, but they reached their destination anyway. Shen Qingqiu saw it land, as Sha Yuan’s mouth fell open and his eyes went wide with shock.

“But that’s my–” Shen Qingqiu heard faintly, and then the world was swept away.