Archive of Our Own

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In the dim light of his candle, Archmaester Perestan read historical books, and with each passing moment, he found more and more mistakes in them.

For some reason, last few months felt very different for all of the Order. They very quickly accepted the fact that Lord Hightower married his daughter and all his sons did the same with his sisters, and started thinking about their own kin themselves. Acolyte Robert Frey boasted of his attractive mother, Alleras did the same with his cousin, but more discreetly…

But Perestan was more concerned with his duty.

He re-read the passage of Grand Maester Elysar about Old King’s daughters, and frowned. Not a single mention of their sexual relations… How could they be so wrong? Or was it an intentional cover-up? He then looked at Beldecar’s “History of the Rhoynish Wars”. Nymeria had children who came to rule Dorne, but how? Through which unmentioned relative did she achieve that?

Finally, Perestan opened “When Women Ruled” and landed on a chapter about Lady Johanna Lannister. She had a young son at the time, sure, but why didn’t Archmaester Abelon mention their betrothal? Surely, that would fit the (seemingly) ancient tradition? He then looked at the candle. Everything was so wrong, so wrong…

And then, he knew what he needed to do. He had to fix history as soon as possible.

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Legend tells of the first tourney in Westeros, where Garth the Greenhand won his eldest daughter’s hand.

Out of all his girls, Maris the Maid was the most beautiful one, with breasts five times bigger than her head and her arse having similar size. All of her family lusted after her, from her father to youngest twin brothers, and all asked her hand. When it nearly came to a war between kin, she herself proposed an idea that would be praised by singers for many next ages.

“Defeat each other on a horse, lance in hand,” she said, swinging her teats to get attention from her relatives. “The one who would prevail would get my hand. Others will have our sisters”. So, they agreed, and on a lush hill that would eventually become Highgarden they set up camps and treks, eager to claim Maris’s maidenhood.

In the first day, many of her brothers lost. Twins were surprisingly unhorsed by Foss the Archer, fearsome Bors by cunning Gilbert, Owen Oakenshield by two oldest siblings and Brandon of the Bloody Blade by Greenhand himself. Their sisters all giggled, trying to guess who would end up with whom in a family marriage, but it was a little bit early for that.

This was what second day was for.
First to get a brother-husband was fat-arsed Florys the Fox, who took humiliated Foss the Archer and his long yet thin cock for herself. From their union, many houses would be born, from proud Peakes to boastful Fossoways, and all of their children would then join their parents in family love, with Foss getting a daughter with the best milk of all the land and Florys three sons to truly satisfy her.

Then, Gilbert of the Vines took his comforting prize, sweet but stale sister Rowan Gold-Tree. He was never satisfied with her bad skills in bed, and so he abandoned her to win over Maris, long married to her father by that time, and never came back. She wept, but then their nephew-son consoled her and took the place of Gilbert, thus creating House Rowan.

John the Oak, huge brute with equally giant cock, got the sister with the sweetest lips in all of Westeros, Ellyn Ever Sweet, and from them sprung Houses Oakheart and Beesbury. Garth the Second, eldest son who most resembled his sire, ended up with Rose of Red Lake, who was most like her older sister in breast size (even if they were a bit smaller), and claimed the place of the tourney for himself.

But the true winner was Garth Greenhand himself. He rode to his voluptuous daughter, crowned her with his vines as his queen of love and beauty, and took her away as far as possible from her jealous brothers. Maris didn’t mind it, since she always believed her father’s dick was the best one, even longer than John’s and definitely thicker.

He rode as far as the mouth of small river named Honeywine and put his banner there, using his magical powers to build a small tower that would eventually become Oldtown. While not very high, it proved impossible to take by Gilbert, and so father-daughter couple remained there, breeding non-stop and creating House Hightower.

But this legend doesn’t end just at that. It also tells how Maris’s breasts couldn’t completely cover her father’s magical dick, how she released her fluids just from Garth’s tip touching her cunt, how her arse-hole was never cut in half… Still, it is most peculiar that in our unusual age people trace family breeding back to the Age of Heroes, when humanity was just starting.

And although knighthood didn’t exist so far back in the past, and that tourneys in Westeros wouldn’t begin until Andal arrival, it is still the story that arouses families to this day.

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Out of all the stories about Long Night, the most peculiar comes from Yi Ti, or – as it was called once – the Great Empire of Dawn.

According to the stories, in the very east of Essos between the Bone Mountains and Grey Waste, this legendary realm lied, ruled by descendants of Lion of Night and his sister-wife, Maiden-Made-of-Light. Seventh of its rulers was an Opal Emperor, who, per usual in our world, took his eldest daughter as a wife and Empress.

His son, however, wanted the throne for himself. A man who would be known as a Bloodstone Emperor always had great ambitions, not only for the realm, but godhood as well. To do that, he dabbled in necromancy at Nefer, hunted people alongside shrikes beyond Five Forts and even went to find mysterious but magically powerful black stones wherever he could.

The time for his ascension had finally come he got words of his sister’s pregnancy. So, he and an army of beasts stormed the capital, killing Opal Emperor and capturing an Amethyst Empress – a fine wife and trophy for her brother. Sister-Made-of-Light then abandoned her children, and enraged Lion of Night descended alongside his demons, putting the world in a darkness eternal.

And while some legends after that talk of the last hero, others show what actually Bloodstone Emperor did to his sister, and it was both horrifying and captivating.

First of all, he used his magic to consume his unborn relative, giving himself even more power in his quest to become God. Then, he decided to do his captive, a woman he craved for a very long time. Before then, Amethyst Empress was their father’s, and never liked her brother’s bad attitude, but now he could finally make her his own.

New Emperor undressed her roughly, admiring her breasts. While Sister-Made-of-Light, a goddess, was much bigger, her descendant was also endowed. He then lost his clothes as well, demonstrating his cock to her. It pumped with black blood, and seemed as if it was boiling. Empress tried not to look, but failed each time.

He then approached her and, despite her attempts at fighting back, put a cock in her mouth, while playing with her right teat at the same time. It was much bigger than Opal Emperor’s, and she nearly passed out while her brother was putting it inside. Once he finished, his sister’s teats started getting bigger, soon approaching the size of her godly ancestor. And veins became black, too.

It is said, that her mind was also flooded with thoughts of joining her brother’s host and becoming his willing consort, but at that time she still fought back. So, he continued, inserting his dick inside her arse-hole, trying to do the same with a lower part of her body. Once the usurper came there, her cheeks became bigger too, and the voices in Empress’s head started to prevail.

But the worst thing happened once her brother entered her cunt. The pleasure was so strong she forgot her slain father-husband and other duties, instantly becoming what he craved – an obedient and complicit sister-wife. When he released his seed inside her, her belly immediately got swollen, and little did she know that monsters now were inside her…

And so, an age of demonic consorts came, when the two of them were ruling their people-slaves, endlessly making love to each other and producing beings of pure darkness that hunted those who resisted and fought ice beings of the Lion… That is, until the last hero appeared to kill the emperor and end his tyranny, as well as stop an invasion from the cold.

But after he did, the dynasty of gods was dead, Great Empire was over and the world got disunited.

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Out of all the kings in Riverlands, all legends point to Benedict the Just as the greatest one.

The circumstances surrounding his rise are directly linked to the Andal invasion. After House Mudd was extinguished by the invaders, remaining nobles started fighting for the crown. Two most likely candidate were Blackwoods and Brackens, families locked in an eternal rivalry. The former were exiled northmen who followed old gods still, and the latter quickly adopted the Seven.

Out of these houses arose a bastard named Benedict Rivers, whose origins are muddy to maesters of our time. Those who empathize with the Raventree Hall say his parents were Blackwoods, with the Stonehedge – Brackens. Some blasphemers even say that he was born of both houses, but we now know that’s impossible.

So, instead of looking at that nonsense, let’s instead focus on two more likelier origin stories of King Benedict.

The first one starts once the bastard came of age, with his Bracken kin still untrustworthy of him. So, he acted. One day, when his elder half-sister was getting ready to go to a sept, he entered her chambers, approached rapidly and kissed on the lips. She was reluctant at first, but as soon as he showed her his brotherly cock, she slowly got accustomed to him, getting from blowjobs to a full-on impregnation.

When their lordly father learned about that, he was furious, and wanted to executed his bastard, but Benedict had a different idea. He proposed trial by combat, which pious Lord Bracken readily accepted. They clashed, and in a heated duel the son barely prevailed over his father. Then, after his trueborn brother accepted his triumph, he left with his sister (future Queen) to build his own realm.

Blackwood version is very much different. In it, Benedict Rivers lived happily alongside his father and other relatives at Raventree, slowly becoming closer and closer with one of his half-sisters. Once Lord Blackwood died, he gave some of his holdfasts to his sons, and legitimized his bastards in order to do so. And as soon as he did, his beloved sister moved in with him as his new Lady.

Legends say they were very gentle with each other, experimenting with each other while growing up and eventually losing their virginities to each other. Marriage came, then, and soon they shared a bed at ever moment, with his gentle lady preferring to be on the bottom. Their noble and just rule soon made him beloved, and so he decided to uplift lives of everyone by reuniting Riverlands…

After that, all versions are the same. King Benedict slowly conquered his neighbors, an on the thirtieth year of war he proclaimed himself Benedict Justman, First of His Name. Then legends differ. In Blackwood account, he took his daughter as a second wife in a manner of First Men. In Bracken one, his sister-wife was long dead by that point, and so he had only one consort like the Seven intended.

The accounts of his daughter-wife also vary widely. In Stonehedge it is told that she was an ambitious woman who dominated him in bed much like he did with her mother, and ruled the Justman castle harsher than he ruled Riverlands. Blackwood girl, meanwhile, was said to be a loving queen who took every load of his with dignity, and ruled in peace much like he did in war.

From that union, came the dynasty that ruled the land between the Neck and the mouth of Blackwater (which would eventually become King’s Landing) for centuries. Sadly, even that came to an end when ironmen came. King Qhored the Cruel took three sons of Bernarr II as prisoners, and when their father attempted to rescue them, he slaughtered all of the family – the last of House Justman.

After which Riverlands never saw such prosperity again.

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As we approach the real history more and more, the more inconsistencies we see with the historical works of past maesters.

The biggest one would probably be the origin of House Martell. For centuries it was believed that an Andal adventurer named Morgan became the first Lord of Sandship (which would eventually become Sunspear). But now we believe that Martell arrival to Dorne was much later, and there was no blood of Andalos ever involved.

Instead, it seems like Princess Nymeria and her brother were the progenitors of that house.

Originally, both of them were rulers of Rhoynar city Ny Sar, and the only Rhoynars to realize that winning against dragon-wielding Valyrians was impossible. Still, they were forced to participate in an alliance of Rhoyne denizens, but instead of trying to fight, they sent only a token host. And while others burned and despaired, Prince and Princess had their fun.

It is said often that Nymeria was the leading one in their sibling marriage, and was always on top of her brother. Our sources, however, indicate that their relationship was more equal than commonly believed, with her switching up and down whenever any of them wanted. Her brother was not weak either, and instead was a greatest advisor for her, and the only relative of hers who could make her cum.

Then, the news came. Prince Garin was defeated, and dragonlords finally conquered Rhoynars. And so, to escape slavery, Nymeria build ten thousand ships, from small to big, and escaped Ny Sar. With their home now lost to Valyria, they started searching for another. And all that journey princely siblings fucked, in places stranger than one man could imagine.

First, they stopped at Basilisk Isles and nearly became playthings for pirates. They then went to Sothoryos, but the constant attack of half-savage Brindled Men meant there was almost no time for family sex. On Naath it was disease, on Summer Islands – small patch of land given to them by natives. All these places were unfit for Nymeria and her brother, and so they continued their voyage.

Finally, the last remnants of her fleet landed on the southern beach of Dorne, where only a few lived. After successfully conquering Wades and Shells at Sandship, princely couple made it their own residence, now called Sunspear, and proclaimed themselves to be rulers of their new home, while her brother-husband took an Andal name, Prince Mors Martell.

From there, they mated each other every day, with him doing his sister and wife in a septon’s pose at night and her riding her brother and husband at day. It was hot in the deserts of Dorne, but the sweat attracted them to each other even more. Four daughters and a son were born in that union, with each one of them making her breasts bigger and bigger, soon reaching the size of dragonlords.

Unfortunately, Prince Mors fell in a battle with Yronwoods, and so Nymeria started seducing their son, purposefully demonstrating to him her bubbly Rhoynar arse. He became her consort soon after, but he never made near as happy as her brother. They ruled and fucked together in the peacetime, but it was eldest daughter of Mors who succeeded her as Princess, according to traditions of their original home.

After she died, her son married his eldest sister, the new Princess, and soon enough from their union came House Martell, the one that would continue ruling Dorne unopposed for many centuries, surviving the wrath of King Aegon, invasion of the Young Dragon and only bending the knee on their own accord.

And all that time remnants of Rhoynar stayed very close as families, much like in the glorious days of Ny Sar and Nymeria.

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Out of all the people, Valyrians have the biggest teats, and at the time of the Doom Lady Daenys Targaryen was the most endowed out of them.

It was customary for the dragonlords to have competitions involving sizes of their relatives, and this was the first time previously unremarkable Targaryens ever won. Daenys the Dreamer, a girl who could see the future during extreme sexual pleasure, made every other noble in Valyria jealous with her ideal child-birthing proportions and natural submissiveness.

No wonder her father claimed her as his wife as soon as she came of age.

Lord Aenar made love to her every three hours, it is said, and each time she came he received a word from her about the future yet to pass. A useful ability, especially when dealing with dozens of rival houses who wanted to strike him down, but of course marital duty and love were present as well. And one day, their father-daughter sex changed the entire history of Westeros.

Maester Marwyn confidently states that this revelation happened at the seventh hour of family love. First one, according to him, was Lady Daenys teasing her father and husband by bending over to show off her fat arse and breasts, then the next one was a teatfuck, and several next ones spent with his cock inside her womb in positions lost to history.

And then, as both of them came at the same time, she saw it. Fire, smoke and dragons dying.

That made her recoil in fear. She started crying, forcing her loving lord to console her through a long kiss with both tongues involved. Then his scared lady told him everything she saw. Valyria was doomed, and the only way to survive was to leave it… So, Aenar had to choose between dying alongside his kin in the fires of Fourteen Flames, or losing all his power.

He chose the latter.

In just a year, Targaryens suddenly sold all of their lands in Freehold, and took all of their wealth and dragons to a new home, a grim fortress on the western verge of the Empire. Others ridiculed the decision of Lord Aenar, mocking him as the weak exile, but eleven years later all those who did that perished in the event that would be known as the Doom.

All the while, Aenar and Daenys were thriving on Dragonstone, taking the entire Narrow Sea and some of its islands as their domain. They never stopped making love to each other, with the daughter-wife eventually getting pregnant with her sister-daughter, Elaena. Her brother Gaemon, who was married to Aenar’s former sister-wife and his mother, produced Aegon in that union, and that’s how it all started.

Soon enough, Aegon and Elaena married each other, and the former eventually became the third Lord of Dragonstone after his father and grandfather. In their union Maegon and Aerea were born, their joint successors, and from them popped three other dragonlords – Aelyx, Baela and Daemion. The former died childless, but the latter married his sister-widow, continuing the bloodline.

At the time, most lords of this island didn’t care much about the mainland Westeros, instead looking east at the war between Volantis and other Free Cities. Daemion was not an exception, but what he loved most was his wife. He was married to his mother before she and Aelyx both died, and although at first, he felt like his sister was not nearly as good, with age he saw more and more of Aerea in her.

Aerea was a fiery consort who dominated her husband-son, and Baela tried to follow in her footsteps. At first, she couldn’t keep up with her trained younger brother, but eventually they managed to find a great balance between each other. And in one of these struggles to get on top, Aerion and Valaena were born.

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Many know about The Dragon and his two sister-wives, but not that many knew this wasn’t their first union.

When Lord Aerion of Dragonstone was still alive, and Targaryen siblings had just reached their manhood and womanhood respectively, ancient customs dictated for the eldest daughter to marry her father and son do the same with his mother. And so, in a twin ceremony, young Aegon married Lady Valaena, while his father did the same with Visenya.

Their first night, while not very described, can be deduced from the rest of their short marriages. Aerion liked his daughter-wife, with her huge dragon curves and cold demeanor enticing him, but it was younger Rhaenys he truly craved. She had even bigger teats and arse-cheeks that wobbled with each step, and so he saw Visenya as more of a duty for him, even if a very sweet one.

His daughter, emotionless per usual, never demonstrated her desires. Still, she was loyal to her father-husband and never cheated on him before his death, which may very well be the best proof of Visenya’s love of him. It is believed she eventually saw his cock as shorter than her brother’s or son’s, and was always on top of him in bed, which gave her freedom to do whatever she craved at the cost of orgasm.

Aegon and Valaena’s union, however, is thought to be a more passionate one. Every son craves his mother, and while she was never as big as her younger daughter, her son visited her at least seven times a day. Only Rhaenys would get the same amount of love after her death, and it is believed that she often played the role of their late mother until the Hellholt.

Valaena, meanwhile, loved her husband-son even more than his father. While her own sire Daemion was always above her, and her brother Aerion gave her an opportunity to dominate in bed, it was Aegon who struck a perfect balance. He treated her like a Queen, always guessing by her face and body whether she wanted it rough or soft and in which position. Oh, and he was longer too…

And while their youngest daughter was unwed for a time being, she found a relative to love as well.

In the days of Lord Daemion, his only son was not yet bound by marriage, and so sought to mate other Targaryens. He found a cousin of a lesser branch eventually, and put a babe in her, the one he eventually took in as his bastard, Orys Baratheon. He grew up in the company of dragon siblings as an equal, and with Rhaenys blossoming into a sexiest woman of her age, it is no wonder he eventually did her.

They always had fun in more desolate chambers, away from their luckier relatives. For Orys, his half-sister was the world, the only woman that made his heart ache. Her breasts were perfect for teat-fucks, her cheeks for slapping, and her screams made him cum every time. It is said that her eventual fate broke him, and he was never as cheerful or passionate ever since it.

Rhaenys, while noting the vigor of her half-brother, did not share his love. She wanted to try all of her relatives, sneaking into beds of her father (who was gentler) and Aegon (who had a bigger cock). Still, she enjoyed Baratheon as well, even after her marrying her true brother, and often travelled to Storm’s End alone in the first ten years of Conqueror’s reign.

But that state didn’t last long. Lord Aerion eventually died mysteriously while at sea (with some attributing that to Visenya in years following), Lady Valaena – in childbirth that killed her son-grandson as well. Aegon became the ruler of Dragonstone, and quickly married both his sisters – a polygamous union unheard of since the Doom of Valyria.

And with that finished, he turned west, to enact his grandiose vision of the united Westeros.

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First three generations

AENAR TARGARYEN, first Lord of Dragonstone,

His daughter-wife, LADY DAENYS,

• Their daughter, ELAENA,

His former sister-wife, LADY JAENAERA,

Her husband-son, GAEMON, second Lord of Dragonstone,

• Their son, AEGON.

Third and fourth generations

AEGON TARGARYEN, third Lord of Dragonstone,

His sister-wife, LADY ELAENA,

• Their son, MAEGON, fourth Lord of Dragonstone,
• Their daughter, LADY AEREA, Maegon’s sister-wife.

Fourth and fifth generations

MAEGON TARGARYEN, fourth Lord of Dragonstone,

His sister-wife, LADY AEREA, also Daemion’s mother-wife before her passing,

• Their eldest son, AELYX, fifth Lord of Dragonstone,
• Their daughter, LADY BAELA, Aelyx’s sister-widow, then Daemion’s sister-wife,
• Their youngest son, DAEMION, sixth Lord of Dragonstone.

Fifth and sixth generations

DAEMION TARGARYEN, sixth Lord of Dragonstone,

His sister-wife, LADY BAELA,

• Their son, LORD AERION, seventh Lord of Dragonstone,
• Their daughter, LADY VALAENA, Aerion’s sister-wife.

Sixth and seventh generations

AERION TARGARYEN, seventh Lord of Dragonstone,

• His daughter-wife, LADY VISENYA,

His former sister-wife, LADY VALAENA, 

• Her husband-son, AEGON, eighth and last Lord of Dragonstone,
• Their daughter, RHAENYS, Orys’s sister-paramour,

His cousin-paramour, RHAELLE, of minor branch,

• Their bastard son, ORYS BARATHEON.

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At the time Lord Aegon looked on his Painted Table alongside his sisters, the entire Westeros was divided into seven independent kingdoms.

The strongest of them was the realm of Isles and Rivers, ruled by the terrible Harren Hoare. He spent much of his reign building Harrenhal, the biggest castle on the continent, and looking east. North was protected by the bogs, while west was way too strong, thanks to a first ever alliance between Casterly Rock and Highgarden.

Stormlands, meanwhile, were a much easier target, although, its King, Argilac the Arrogant, did his best to prevent the decline of his realm. He defeated Dornish raiders, enlarged his army and – most of all – trained his daughter-wife Argella in the same way. Not solely in political matters, but in love as well, even more so than his numerous sons.

Their marriage was cold on the outside, with them not showing their bond to anyone, but maesters of Storm’s End noted that behind close doors they were as lusty as normal relatives. It is believed that Queen Argella was obedient and always gave her cunt or arse-hole to her father, while her father-husband ensured none of her brothers would get her before she would be as good as him in bed.

The Vale, while separated from Riverlands by mountains, was also considered by Black Harren. Its ruler was young and inexperienced, only recently coming of age, but he had his mother-wife, Sharra Arryn, at his side. She ruled as his regent for more than a decade, and she remained in power after his manhood… by marrying him and becoming his greatest advisor, of course.

While King Ronnel was supposedly the overlord of the Eyrie, everyone in the Vale knew that the true ruler was his Queen. She was behind all of his policies, but most of all she dominated him in sex, which she did everywhere her dear son wanted. He, a spoiled brat, took any opportunity to do that, unaware his brother and heir resented him for that…

In the extreme south, Princess Meria of Dorne continued to proudly demonstrate her power and independence by ordering raids on her neighbors, even in spite of her old age. Her former husband-son, who was expected to soon inherit Sunspear, had already assumed most of power, and even remarried a much younger relative, namely their daughter.

Prince Nymor, in spite of his frail health, never failed to do his marital duty, continuing his bloodline by fucking his daughter’s incredibly fat arse at every opportunity, even in Meria’s presence. His new wife loved her father-husband for that, and wished secretly for a moment they would rule together. After all, they weren’t as martial as her, and craved peace first and foremost.

Near the Wall, meanwhile, Starks proudly ruled winter in their splendid isolation. King Torrhen, unburned with conflicts in the south, spent all his free time with his beloved daughter-wife, and while they were as cold as Argilac and Argella together, that was expected in the North. What wasn’t expected, however, was the involvement of other relatives.

Both his sons participated alongside his father in the royal orgy, and even Brandon Snow, Queen’s bastard uncle, showed up once or twice a week. It is said in the chronicles of Winterfell that she rarely appreciated that, but felt it was necessary to prevent tension in the family. And in the end, what happened to Jonos Arryn would prove her correct.

No matter what kind of family sex – Dornish passionate one or Northern subdued, Westeros stood disunited at the time.

And Lord Aegon wished to change that.

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Two years have passed since then, and nearly all of Westeros, except fractured Iron Islands and Dorne, stood united under three-headed dragon.

Harren Hoare fell first, burnt alive by the Black Dread in his own castle, and with him ended the dominance of ironborn in Riverlands. At the same time, Rhaenys and Orys marched onto Storm’s End, having defeated and killed half of Argilac’s sons at Wendwater, while Visenya visited one Cracklaw castle after another, accepting their surrender to Targaryens.

Storm King and his remaining kin, after learning of what happened to the north, parted with Queen Argella. It is said that, for the first time ever, eldest Durrandon allowed his sons to join him in family sex, mayhaps knowing what would happen next. Witnesses also report after that, Argilac’s daughter-wife couldn’t sit for a week, and even smelled of her relatives’ seed for longer.

Unsurprisingly, none of defenders could stand against the dragon, and soon enough Argella became the last remnant of her family. And while she attempted to defend her castle against the invaders, her own men betrayed her in less than a fortnight, and tried to offer her lifeless body to Orys Baratheon as a means of surrender. Unfortunately for them, it wasn’t enough to save them from the noose.

And while Baratheon was adjusting to being a new, lordly ruler of Stormlands, his trueborn siblings gathered together to oppose the might of Lannisters and Gardeners. With the former bending the knee and the latter dying in a fire, Westerlands and Reach were theirs, and a mere steward by the name of Harlan Tyrell rose to a lordship over Highgarden.

Then, northmen came. King Torrhen Stark gathered a host to oppose Targaryens, but as soon as he found the ruins of Harrenhal, he became convinced how foolish the notion was. When Aegon approached his army, he wisely bent the knee and gave his crown to the dragon, thus returning a mere lord, but an alive one.

Annals of Winterfell note that his sons were furious that they were deprived of being a royalty, and Brandon Snow still wanted to slay Balerion as he intended, but Torrhen knew the way to calm them down. He offered his daughter-wife to them for a month, while he travelled his former realm to calm his men about the loss of independence. A wise choice, and the one that prevented much bloodshed.

Meanwhile, in the Eyrie Sharra Arryn prepared her surrender in secrecy, fearful her young husband-son would want to prove his valor against an enemy. She sent a letter to one of Targaryens, notifying her willingness to join them if she and her kin were spared… But the Queen received no answer. Days came and went, and finally, Vhagar landed in her castle, with other Arryns as witnesses.

Both King Ronnel and Prince Jonos then took out their swords, but as the former prepared himself for a duel, his mother-wife approached and showed him her teats, widely believed to be the biggest and sexiest ones in Westeros at a time, promising a week of non-stop sex if he complied… While the King was unsure, his brother, ever resentful, left the great hall, with sweet revenge on his mind.

So, in the end, they both bend the knee, and Visenya even stayed for that very week watching mother and son engage in their usual lust, even helping her took his cock in whenever it was needed. A great way to spend time; unfortunately, Rhaenys never had one. Instead of watching family sex in the mountains, she went to enforce the submission of Dorne, a longer story for another time.

Aegon, meanwhile, went back south and marched to Oldtown, which accepted him with grace. There, High Septon crowned him with a beautiful circlet of Valyrian steel and proclaimed him the first King of Andal, Rhoynar and First Men.

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Queen Rhaenys flew from one Dornish castle to another, wishing to speak to its lords, but all of them were desolate and lifeless.

Finally, at Sunspear she met Princess Meria herself, the only one in her own domain. She demanded for Dorne to submit to the dragons or fear their wroth… but she remained unconvinced. Humiliated, the Queen flew back north, where she rejoined her bastard brother at Storm’s End. They cared for their babes born before her marriage to Aegon, castle’s new heirs, and made love to each other too.

Although it’s not uncommon for highborn relatives to not care much about their baseborn ones, Rhaenys and Orys remained close even when she became Queen. He loved fucking her, losing himself in her womb where he could barely control his cock, and she loved mixing up King’s skill with Lord’s fiery nature once in a while. But, this time, they had a plan to discuss as well.

Next few years were quiet. New King conquered the Iron Islands and oversaw a kingsmoot that put Greyjoys in charge, his Queens either helped their brother-husband build a new capital, named King’s Landing for it was the place where he stepped in Westeros to conquer it, or visited their new vassals in royal progresses. But they never forgot what they failed to take.

And soon enough, Dorne went into flames.

Three dragons descended onto its keeps and holds, only to find them just as empty. Orys Baratheon marched onto Wyl, where he was embarrassingly defeated and captured, while Harlan Tyrell took Hellholt and the very heart of the region. Finally, Aegon and his sisters landed in Sunspear, put Lord Rosby in charge as Dorne’s new Warden and came back to King’s Landing.

Holding south wasn’t so easy as taking it, though. Its capital rebelled and restored Martells as rulers, Lord Tyrell disappeared on a way to recapture the castle, while Wyl of Wyl took Orys’s right hand as punishment. Dragons returned, but while Aegon and Visenya were successful in their fights, Rhaenys was taken unawares by men of Lord Uller, who put a scorpion bolt in Meraxes’s eye.

Huge beast fell, taking its rider with him, and all Westeros mourned the loss of the most beautiful woman in the world. As an exchange for killing the Queen, Lord Wyl released Baratheon, and he came back to Storm’s End a broken man, who never found good enough relative again. Her remaining siblings enacted their flaming revenge, and soon enough the war turned into a senseless slaughter on both sides.

Lords and ladies died violently, castles turned to melted stone, and seemingly not much could stop that… Until Princess of Dorne died. Prince Nymor ascended as ruler, with Deria as his daughter-wife, both craving peace at any cost. So, they wrote to King’s Landing, requesting an audience with King Aegon himself, and while they waited for a response, they made love to each other.

Princess loved riding her father-husband, per usual for female heirs of Rhoynar blood, which was their way to prove how good they would be in charge. Nymor Martell loved that too, for although her breasts weren’t as big as Meria’s in her youth, they were created by him, and he cherished them greatly. But not as much as her giant arse-cheeks inherited from Nymeria herself, of course.

Eventually, in spite of much opposition (especially from his mutilated half-brother), King Aegon invited Princess Deria to talk. They did so behind close doors, and not much of what they said survived, but in the end, Targaryen took off with his guest on a dragon, returned to Sunspear and proclaimed the end of his war.

This was the last major conflict of Aegon the Conqueror, and so all Westeros save Dorne had entered an era of peace and prosperity.

Chapter Text

Even though Aegon the Conqueror’s reign was largely peaceful, first cracks of Faith Militant uprising started to show even then.

Aegon’s marriage to Rhaenys gave him only one child, Prince Aenys, who grew up a weak but kind man. When he was five, Visenya gave him a little half-brother, boy by the name of Prince Maegor, who soon became the strongest warrior of his era. Soon, whispers started forming, the ones that suggested younger son of the Dragon should inherit the Iron Throne…

But a bigger crisis happened when Aenys became of age. Usually, he’d married his mother per tradition, but with her dead for fifteen years, he was instead offered the hand of his aunt Visenya. When word of that reached the High Septon, he reminded King Aegon that polygamy was an abomination to the Seven and that, if wanted his son to marry his sister, he’d have to fly to Oldtown for a divorce. He obliged.

Prince and his royal aunt-wife spent their first night there, in a castle of House Hightower. While Aenys tried very hard to make Visenya satisfied, by employing every method from caressing her cunt to desperately trying to dominate her. That didn’t work – the Queen never came from her nephew, who lasted only few minutes and had a cock much smaller than Aegon… or her son’s.

Maegor wasn’t present at his brother’s wedding, understandably pissed off that he didn’t get his mother. Although he tried to become her second husband repeatedly, all attempts were shut down by King Aegon, who didn’t want to insult the powerful Faith. Still, even though Visenya did her duty with Aenys, everyone knows she visited her son way more often, and seemed much happier after that.

Soon, she birthed her first child, Princess Rhaena, who seemed to inherit her nature rather than Aenys’s. Then came Prince Aegon, Viserys and Jaehaerys, all of whom removed Maegor further and further from the throne. Finally, gentle and intelligent Alysanne was born, and thus a time to arrange future family marriages began.

With her father married to his aunt, Rhaena was betrothed to Young Aegon, while the same was done for Viserys and Alysanne. The first brother-sister pair was successful, with them spending much time together even before they came of age. The second one, though, didn’t work out, and both siblings spent much time barely interacting with each other.

And then, King Aegon the Dragon passed away.

During that, Aenys was on a royal progress at Highgarden, while Visenya took care of her brother… or so she claimed. Instead, she spent time with her beloved Prince Maegor, screaming louder than with any of her three husbands. Half of that session she rode him, half – was helplessly beneath her son, in a sexual struggle not seen in Targaryens for generations.

While we saw what the Queen’s thoughts about Maegor’s long and thick cock probably were, Prince’s own thoughts (according to Grand Maester Gawen) were also interesting. He hated Aenys for marrying his mother, the one with perfectly huge and round teats and tight arse, and wanted her, the only woman that could get on top of him and make him release seed multiple times, as his wife… first, at least.

When servants noted their masters of King’s death, they stopped their days-long sex and started preparing his funeral… while occasionally stopping to make love, of course. By the time Prince Aenys arrived, his father was already burned, and so he and his aunt-wife instead started to wait for High Septon for a coronation.

And so, in a half-built Red Keep, the man was proclaimed King Aenys of House Targaryen, and as his first act he named Maegor his Hand and allowed him to make love to Visenya as well out of sheer kindness.

Chapter Text

KING AEGON TARGARYEN, First of His Name, the Conqueror,

His former sister-wife, QUEEN VISENYA, now Aenys’s aunt-wife,

• Their son, PRINCE MAEGOR, 

His sister-wife, {QUEEN RHAENYS}, slain by Dornishmen, 

• Their son, PRINCE AENYS, Visenya’s nephew-husband, 

Aenys’s children with Visenya: 

Their eldest daughter, PRINCESS RHAENA, Aegon’s sister-bride, heavily pregnant,

Their eldest son, PRINCE AEGON, Rhaena’s brother-groom, 

Their middle son, PRINCE VISERYS, betrothed to Alysanne, 

Their youngest son, PRINCE JAEHAERYS, 

Their youngest daughter, PRINCESS ALYSANNE, betrothed to Viserys. 

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Although King Aenys’s coronation was magnificent, his reign quickly became extremely chaotic.

Troubles began when his aging Queen Visenya birthed her last child, Princess Vaella, who soon died in the cradle. Immediately she blamed her nephew-husband and his weak seed for that, and angrily retreated to Dragonstone alongside Maegor, and in their petty desire for revenge they married there by Valyrian customs (since no septon would approve of polygamous marriage).

When Aenys heard of that, he desperately started begging them in his well-documented letters to annul their union, but they remained adamant. For the first time since the Conqueror divorced her, she felt true pleasure and came at every thrust, while her new husband-son was too concerned with burying himself in her breasts and desperately trying to conceive a child with his mother-wife.

In the end, the King was forced to remove them as both Queen and Hand and send them into a five-year exile to Free Cities. They happily obliged with that and left on their dragons for Pentos, slowly creating the plan to take the Iron Throne for themselves. Little did they know at a time, that soon Aenys’s own mistakes would help this mother-son pair…

With Visenya and Maegor gone, only female relatives King Aenys still had, were his two daughters. While Alysanne was cute, she didn’t capture nearly as much attention as his eldest, Rhaena. She was just as strong-willed and dominant as her mother, but looked more like late Queen Rhaenys. Mayhaps, it was his desire to fuck his long-dead mother, alongside her having the biggest teats in Westeros at that time…

So, in the presence of his court, he announced his intention to marry his beloved Princess. One problem – she was already married to her brother, and even gave him twin daughters. Still, Aenys was adamant. He spent much of preparations fucking his daughter-bride, who showed him fake pleasure out of respect for her father-groom, while in the shadows, Swords and Stars plotted.

Even High Septon’s grim warning against abominable polygamy didn’t stop the King. He covered her enormous breasts in cum while Prince Aegon filled her womb, then they switched as the feast was being prepared by the cooks… But when the day came, and Aenys kissed Rhaena with his tongue deep inside, Faith Militant stormed the wedding and started the slaughter.

Only the valiance of Kingsguards saved Targaryens present in the capital, and soon enough they descended through hidden tunnels of the growing Red Keep to the hidden canal (according to the written memoirs of the Old King, at the very least). There, they decided that the best idea would be to split and avoid capture by the fanatical followers of the Seven.

King Aenys, frail per usual, decided to go to the closest Dragonstone in disguise, while his dutiful middle son Viserys volunteered to help him in that. Aegon and Rhaena wanted to return, secretly take their dragons and fly to Casterly Rock, where their close ally Lord Liman Lannister ruled. Finally, Jaehaerys and Alysanne, already madly in love with each other, decided to go to Storm’s End in a similar way.

And so, they parted. The latter were warmly received by Rogar Baratheon, who disguised them as smallfolk for protection. Eldest children of the King also arrived to Westerlands safely, and started gathering an army to take back King’s Landing. Finally, Aenys and Viserys reached the island, where even more weakened father finally passed away in his sleep.

For a while, it felt like the High Septon was the true ruler of the Seven Kingdoms, but then, Maegor returned. He took Dragonstone, defeated and imprisoned his nephew with Aegon’s girls, and proclaimed himself the new King of Andals, Rhoynar and the First Men, alongside Visenya as his Queen. After securing his rule in the castle, he flew to the capital, intent on taking it back from the Holy Orders…

Chapter Text

One day, when Poor Fellows and Warrior’s Sons prayed together in a Sept of Remembrance, dragon came from the skies and burned them all down.

It was Balerion, with King Maegor on his back, who soon landed among the unfinished Red Keep and proclaimed himself a new ruler of Westeros. In few days entire King’s Landing was liberated, and victorious Targaryen celebrated that by mating his mother-wife, releasing inside of her to ensure his heir would be born.

At the same time, Prince Aegon gathered a host to oppose his usurper uncle. It wasn’t big, but he hoped to ambush the King, who was still too busy fighting pious fools, and slain him in battle. Unfortunately, Maegor knew his pretender nephew was a much bigger priority, and so in a battle near Harrenhal he and Visenya killed him, took Princess Rhaena captive and forced obedience from Lord Lannister.

With his niece now back in the capital, King Maegor decided to double the chances of getting an heir, and so married her in a swift ceremony. High Septon was furious, but only for three days. He died in that time, and his compliant successor was installed by the elder Queen… but that only fueled the hate. Rhaena’s eldest daughter Rhaella also disappeared around that time, seemingly killed by her captors.

Their rare nights together were anything but love-filled. The King saw his second Queen solely as a means of depriving his two remaining nephews of any power, and didn’t care about her majestic beauty. Rhaena, meanwhile, hated Maegor’s guts and waited for a chance to escape, using her gigantic breasts, fat arse and skilled mouth to decrease his attention.

Then, a moment came. Queen Visenya finally passed away, leaving her husband-son wracked with grief. While he prepared her funeral, his niece-wife managed to take her dragon and slip away to her youngest siblings, leaving Maegor without a partner. Wrathful King enacted revenge on Prince Viserys, torturing him until he lost his life, earning even more hatred than before, and not just from Holy Orders.

Rhaena knew where to go. Storm’s End were where Jaehaerys and Alysanne hid, and they were her only hope. Lord Rogar met her with much joy, and once her siblings were brought back to Storm’s End, Baratheon finally declared sole surviving son of Aenys as a rightful King of Andals, Rhoynar and First Men, and arranged a marriage between him and his eldest sister.

Yet again Jaehaerys and Alysanne were deprived of a way to marry. First were her and Viserys, now him and Rhaena… Still, that was a custom, and angering Faith when it controlled much of the continent would be unwise. So, in the end they had a decent first night, with sister-bride noting he was the second-best man in her life, only less capable and shorter than Prince Aegon.

In King’s Landing, King Maegor became weirdly passive with his numerous defeats. Half the realm supported Swords and Stars, half – Prince Jaehaerys, and only a few lords of Crownlands came to his side. He talked with them about his betrothal to a grand-niece Aerea, and strategy against Baratheons, but all his lords later noted in their memoirs how tired and sad he was.

Then, as the sun set, he sent them away, and by the next morning the King was dead, impaled by the spikes of his throne. In a short time, royal nephew arrived and swiftly took the capital, with his sister-wife at his side. But Jaehaerys was yet uncrowned, and the Faith was largely against him, so he had to think of a way to heal the realm.

But a much more important matter was the one of Alysanne. In spite of Rhaena’s bigger teats and arse, it was his kind and intelligent younger sister he loved, and not his stern older, so he had to find a way to make her his sister-wife… either the second one, or the only one.

Chapter Text

In the beginning of his reign, King Jaehaerys had to face three trials – convincing Faith to end their rebellion, showing Rogar Baratheon that he was a capable ruler, and persuading his sister-wife Rhaena that Alysanne needed to join them in their union.

Ever since getting on the Iron Throne, he tried to balance mercy with justice. Unlike his uncle Maegor, he never burned or executed members of the Holy Orders, instead either offering to join his service (with the highest members even allowed in the Kingsguard) or to go to the Wall and join the Nights Watch. With this merciful approach, soon enough fanatical believers found themselves deprived of any men.

Jaehaerys also invited brightest minds of the realm to devise a new law. Doctrine of Exceptionalism it was called, and it told that Targaryens, as the last dragonriders, were more gods than men, and as such could marry more than one relative. Soon enough, these same people left King’s Landing to spread this word to towns and villages, thus ensuring everyone would know how special the royal family was.

His Hand, meanwhile, was a bit more difficult to deal with. Lord Rogar was stubborn and saw his King as a child to be controlled, and he believed that Swords and Stars were too powerful to properly deal with. So, one day, Jaehaerys invited him to a place that he would soon turn into Dragonpit, and demonstrated his biggest weapon – Vermithor the Bronze Fury.

Although Grand Maester Elysar, who was also present, noted that Baratheon looked reserved and calm, it is known that soon after he resigned as a Hand and returned to Storm’s End, fully understanding the unspoken threat. Be loyal, the King implied, or I will burn your castle. Since then, half a dozen weaker Hands changed for a few years, until Jaehaerys had finally found the greatest one, Septon Barth.

Queen Rhaena was the hardest, though. She always desired to be a sole ruler or a powerful consort, and she never liked her kinder and smarter sister. In King Jaehaerys she saw a great brother-husband, stronger than her father and gentler than her uncle… but not as good as poor Prince Aegon. While she rarely ever came to his cock, she still eagerly shared his bed and offered him sex whenever possible.

But her youngest brother’s dick rose harder at Alysanne, still. Sure, she had smaller breasts and arse-cheeks, but she always knew what he wanted, as if she could read his mind. If he wanted a relative blowjob – she offered that, wolf’s pose -wolf’s pose, while Rhaena always did solely what she desired. Not to mention that they both released several times a day at the same time…

So, quarrels broke out between royal siblings over their youngest sister, with sister-wife believing her brother-husband hated her (even though he just wanted to marry second relative he craved more). Rhaena tried her best to regain control, by walking naked in the Red Keep, waking Jaehaerys up with her teats suffocating his cock, even getting the same hair as Alysanne...

That didn’t work. Her younger siblings still married in the greatest ceremony of their age, called the Golden Wedding, and wrathful Rhaena couldn’t stop them. So, filled with hate, she took her sole surviving daughter, Aerea, and left for Dragonstone, where she lived a decade. When her last child died in a dragon-flying accident, the Queen flew to Harrenhal, and spent the rest of her life there.

At the same time, Jahaerys and Alysanne spent much time together, be it the capital or a royal progress, fucking each other like hares for weeks and months. Unsurprisingly, soon the new Queen got pregnant, and although first two of her babes died in cradle, the third one was a healthy boy named Aemon, new heir for the Conciliator.

With that, new King’s mission was over. The Faith surrendered and agreed to Jaehaerys’s limitations (like outlawing Holy Orders), Rogar Baratheon was in his place and Alysanne finally became his sister-wife.

Chapter Text

“Our King Jaehaerys is better with his roads than with his kin,” said Septon Barth once, and this statement quite accurately sums up much of his rule.

Once Prince Aemon matured, he, per usual for an eldest son, took his mother as his wife. He loved Alysanne more than anything else, even disregarding his sexier sisters to devote himself to her wit and kindness. And while the Queen was more obsessed with her royal brother, she believed that, once she would teach him every position and trick, her son would surpass Jaehaerys in bed.

In this marriage Queen Alysanne would soon get pregnant again, granting her son a sister-daughter named Rhaenys. And even though her birth made them much busier, they still spent a lot of time fucking each other, with Aemon slowly lasting longer and longer with his mother-wife without cumming. He also took on a role of her milk’s taster, something which made her release even more often than before.

King Jaehaerys, meanwhile, took his eldest daughter Alyssa as a second wife, but soon that union turned out to be not nearly as perfect. She was wild and boyish, and while she was as beautiful as any dragonlord, he never felt nearly as aroused by her as by Alysanne. At the same time, young Queen misliked how her father-husband tried make more of a lady and forbade from being on top.

Still, they did their duty, and soon enough Prince Viserys was born, named after King’s late brother. But even though Queen Alyssa had trouble taking care of her brother-son, Jaehaerys continued comforting her in sex, which mended their quarrel for a while. Little did she know at time, that all father-daughter lust present at a time would turn into a difficult labor of Daemon, and their eventual separation…

Other children married between each other. Prince Baelon first got with his younger sister Maegelle, a pious and timid girl who demanded her brother-husband’s total obedience. Their marriage was happy yet brief, with her soon dying from a greyscale, and so he remarried to lustful and sex-crazed Saera, who was anything but his previous lover.

Princess Saera was believed to be the biggest-breasted Targaryen of her era, and her constant desire to breed was only matched by her desire to marry her every relative. Still, only Baelon fell to her charms, as although he loved Maegelle for her kindness, he desired a more outward family lover. And so, he made love to her twice the time than his previous sister-wife, but unfortunately all their sons died in cradle…

Finally, the last of Jaehaerys’s sons, Vaegon, married his frightened and delicate sister Daella, whose union was described by peers as exceptionally unhappy. Well-educated bookworm of a brother-husband only did his duty once or twice a week, and frail stature with breasts just around the size of her head and mediocre arse couldn’t really convince him to do her more often.

It all ended tragically, when, after several years of no pregnancy, she finally got a child in her womb. It sapped nearly all of her power and eventually killed her in childbirth, with newborn Princess Aemma only narrowly surviving that. Vaegon was left without a partner, and although he mated Saera quite often, he still rejected his other sisters, waiting for his girl to mature…

So, by the time the dynastic crisis began, situation in the Targaryen family was as such: Aemon happily fucked his mother-wife, who at that point almost completely abandoned the King, and prepared to wed his only daughter; Jaehaerys and Alyssa quarreled, with the former preparing Viserys to rule, and the latter fucking recently of age Daemon on Dragonstone.

Meanwhile, Baelon was still mating Saera, unaware she did their father and younger brother twice the time more than him. Vaegon took care of Aemma, also making sure she would be with him and only him after she would achieve womanhood. A calm moment, before a great storm.

Chapter Text

KING JAEHAERYS TARGARYEN, First of His Name, the Conciliator,

His daughter-wife, QUEEN ALYSSA,

• Their eldest son, PRINCE VISERYS,
• Their youngest son, PRINCE DAEMON,

His sister-wife, QUEEN ALYSANNE, also Aemon’s mother-wife,

Her husband-son, PRINCE AEMON, also Rhaenys’s father-husband,

• Their only daughter, PRINCE RHAENYS, heavily pregnant,

Other children of Jaehaerys and Alysanne:

Second son, PRINCE BAELOR, Maegelle’s brother-husband,

Second daughter, PRINCESS MAEGELLE, Baelor’s sister-wife,

Youngest son, PRINCE VAEGON, Daella’s brother-widower,

Third daughter, {PRINCESS DAELLA}, Vaegon’s sister-wife, died in childbirth,

• Their daughter, PRINCESS AEMMA,

Fourth daughter, PRINCESS SAERA,

Fifth daughter, {PRINCESS VISERRA}, fell from a horse,

Youngest daughter, PRINCESS GAEL.

Chapter Text

The story of the first Great Council is seen by maesters as the one that started with the small island of Tarth being attacked by exiles from the Free Cities.

When words reached King’s Landing, Jaehaerys started preparing an answer, but his valiant eldest son didn’t want to hear that. In spite of his kin’s protests, like his mother-wife sucking his cock or his daughter-wife noting how she was just a month short of birthing his children-grandchildren, Aemon still hopped on his dragon and flew to deal with Myrish pirates.

Unfortunately, that was his doom. While he was treated with Lord Cameron, a foe sneaked into their tent and put a crossbow bolt into his neck. He died quickly, and left Queen Alysanne and Princess Rhaenys a widow. His twin babes, Aenora and Aenor, were left without a father-grandfather, but the biggest crisis of the dynasty was just beginning.

Rhaenys was taught by the Queen that one day she would rule Westeros, and the Prince gave her the knowledge to defend herself. As such, in spite of all pleas to marry the next male heir Viserys, she pushed her claim, the one which was quickly denied by the King. That lead to a quarrel between Jaehaerys and Alysanne, the last one in their lives…

In a few short months, Queen Alysanne died on Dragonstone. The Princess saw that as probably connected with the King, and only became angrier, near-wishing to take HER Iron Throne by force. Thankfully, the war was avoided when Prince Vaegon intervened, and proposed his father to summon all his lords and let them choose an heir to the throne.

King Jaehaerys loved the idea, and so in a year, many noblemen and noblewomen were gathered by his son (the ruler himself decided not to go due to poor health) in Harrenhal, the only castle that could hold them all. First claims were weak, like a cousin of the long-removed branch, supposed bastards of Maegor and the current monarch…

Then, it was time to make love for closer picks. Prince Vaegon took his daughter Princess Aemma to the center of the hall and put her under him, making her moan with each thrust (per her training). He saw this council as a situation where he could win in both ways – either still remaining an advisor, or becoming a new heir of his father. Still, their presentation wasn’t near as lustful to impress the lords.

Princess Saera’s claims were quickly dismissed, and so it was time for Rhaenys and her two children to press the claim. Although she herself and her daughter were quickly ignored on the account of their sex, Prince Aenor was seen more favorably. He was young, sure, but his late father was valiant, and mayhaps he would become the same…

And then, Viserys, Alyssa and Daemon entered the great hall. They were already naked, with the latter bigger than the former and their mother demonstrating her head-sized breasts. Nobles watched as she took their two cocks and started sucking them, then allowed Prince Viserys, as her eldest and the claimant, to enter her cunt while her younger son begrudgingly took her arse-hole…

It was so passionate and wild, that soon enough near everyone were screaming for Viserys to be instated as an heir, and so the Old King did before his rapidly approaching death. Only Starks, Baratheons and Velaryons were still on Aenor’s side, something that would account in the very soon future, but at the time, seed-covered Queen Alyssa felt like a true victor, both of council and pleasure.

Two years later, Jaehaerys passed away after a long and prosperous rule over the Seven Kingdoms, and his son-grandson ascended the Iron Throne. He wasn’t a warrior like Rhaenys, but he was a lovable man who radiated fun whenever he went. A good way to preserve greatness, surely…

Chapter Text

During most of Viserys’s reign, his biggest enemy were not Dornishmen or wildlings, but rather his own brother.

Daemon was a violent and unpredictable man, who easily betrayed his own allies or side with his supposed enemy whenever he wanted it, and Prince Vaegon even called him “Maegor of our time” in letters. King Viserys, realizing that he would make a terrible ruler, tried his best to get a male heir out of his beloved mother-wife, but the only time they had a babe together, it was a girl named Rhaenyra.

Unfortunately for him, Queen Alyssa’s body was made for battle more than childbirth, and each new labor was more difficult than the previous. So, when after two years of constant love-filled sex she announced a babe inside her womb, most knew what would happen. And they weren’t wrong – in spite of her husband-son’s help, she passed away with their son still inside her belly.

That was when regretful and grieving Viserys made an impulsive choice. During Alyssa’s funeral, he gathered all lords present and proclaimed his daughter a Princess of Dragonstone, and made every one of them kneel to her. Vengeful Daemon left the capital immediately after, desiring to carve a kingdom on Stepstones for himself that he would never get from his older brother.

King’s trusted Hand and uncle, Vaegon, also made a move at the time. He told his daughter to go comfort his nephew, naked, and her breasts and arse were so tempting to Viserys, who recently lost a relative to fuck, that they made love immediately after. And in just few months, he married his cousin Aemma in grand ceremony, with her father’s goal of a grandson on the throne getting closer…

Meanwhile, Prince Daemon’s very own gloomy aunt-wife, Princess Gael (who wasn’t mentioned prior due to her irrelevancy), passed away mysteriously. That gave him an opportunity to return from his island kingdom to claim to his cousin, Princess Aenora, who craved such a fiery and unpredictable partner. They married in Pentos, away from her mother, and spent ten days in their marital bed.

Soon, babes came of these two wombs. Aemma birthed three sons and a daughter, with the first one becoming a true heir in the eyes of many, while Aenora ironically repeated Alyssa’s fate – she gave Daemon twin daughters, and died trying to birth him a son. This was also the time Rhaenyra started wearing black gowns in response to Aemma’s green ones, codifying the name of their factions.

But before continuing with the struggle between forming Blacks and Greens, let us see Aenora’s twin brother, Aenor. Unlike many other relatives of his, he never cared that much for women, but he was still married to his mother Rhaenys per tradition. Soon, she started suddenly popping out babes, a son and two daughters, and while some spoke of their uncertain fatherhood, Princess shut them roughly.

While Daemon was losing the Stepstones, and Aenor was dying from a stab of a crazed man, King Viserys tried to mend the rift between his two Queens. He suggested marrying his daughter-wife Rhaenyra to his oldest son Aegon, but the hate between her and his cousin was too strong. With common sense disregarded by both factions, war was approaching fast, and there was nothing he could do…

Soon, Aegon matured, and married his mother in a ceremony half a family didn’t attend. In that union, twin siblings, Jaehaerys and Jaehaera (called Younger to differentiate them with late Aenor’s children), as well as son Maelor were born. Viserys also reluctantly married shy and not-in-this-world Helaena out of duty, but they rarely ever had any sex together.

Instead, the King spent more time with another daughter-wife, Rhaenyra, whom he married few months prior. They had less children together, only two sons Aegon the Younger and Prince Viserys. Daemon also showed up, having lost his little kingdom, and made up with his brother… by marrying his niece as well.

Chapter Text

Targaryens in 129 AC

KING VISERYS TARGARYEN, First of His Name,

His mother-wife, {QUEEN ALYSSA}, died in childbirth,

His first daughter-wife, QUEEN RHAENYRA,

• Their eldest son, PRINCE AEGON, the Younger,
• Their youngest son, PRINCE VISERYS,

His cousin-wife, QUEEN AEMMA,

Her husband-son, PRINCE AEGON, the Elder,

• Their eldest son, PRINCE JAEHAERYS, the Younger,
• Their only daughter, PRINCESS JAEHAERA, the Younger,
• Their youngest son, PRINCE MAELOR,

His second daughter-wife, QUEEN HELAENA,

Other children of Viserys and Aemma:

Their middle son, PRINCE AEMOND,

Their youngest son, PRINCE DAERON,

Daemon’s branch:

PRINCE DAEMON TAEGARYEN, King Viserys’s brother,

His aunt-wife, {PRINCESS GAEL}, fell from a horse,

His cousin-wife, {PRINCESS AENORA}, died in childbirth,

• Their eldest daughter, PRINCESS BAELA,
• Their youngest daughter, PRINCESS RHAENA,

His niece-wife, PRINCESS RHAENYRA,

Vaegon’s branch:

PRINCE VAEGON TARGARYEN, King Viserys’s uncle,

His sister-wife, {PRINCESS DAELLA}, died in childbirth,

His daughter-wife, QUEEN AEMMA,

Rhaenys’s branch:

PRINCESS RHAENYS TARGARYEN, King Viserys’s cousin,

Her father-husband, {PRINCE AEMON}, killed by Myrish pirates,

• Their only daughter, PRINCESS AENORA,

Her husband-son, {PRINCE AENOR}, slain on a market,

• Their only son, PRINCE JAEHAERYS, the Elder,
• Their eldest daughter, PRINCESS ELAENA,
• Their youngest daughter, PRINCESS JAEHAERA, the Elder.

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Soon after Daemon’s marriage to Rhaenyra, King Viserys died in his chambers of the Red Keep.

This, alongside with his supposed female heir being too busy birthing at Dragonstone, a safe place where two other Queens wouldn’t be able to poison it, gave Greens a perfect opportunity to scheme. All of them convened and started preparing Aegon the Elder’s coronation, which happened in a perfect time to prevent the Blacks from knowing.

Rhaenyra’s daughter, unfortunately, died in a cradle, and that alongside news of King Aegon II’s ascension made the Black Queen furious. Inside the island fortress she crowned herself as well, the true heir of Viserys, and started gathering her allies. Her cousin Jaehaerys the Elder flew to the Vale to treat with Lady Arryn, his sister Elaena flew to Storm’s End, and Queen’s uncle-husband – to Harrenhal.

Greens, meanwhile, were a little bit more cautious, thanks to Prince Vaegon’s Handship. While Aemond did leave to sway Baratheons to their cause, the Hand himself and his daughter-wife tried their best to prevent bloodshed through negotiations (those that Rhaenyra herself declined, feeling a title of Dragonstone’s Lady was too low for her), and also hid their treasury elsewhere in case of it happening.

This resulted in some initial triumphs of the Blacks. Both Lady Jeyne and Lord Stark accepted Prince’s terms, while Daemon took over much of Riverlands. But the biggest clash happened in Stormlands. Prince Aemond met his cousin Elaena in Baratheon castle, and together they held a sex competition with a prize being Lord Borros’s alliance. In the end, Prince came first, but instead of accepting his loss…

He chose after the Princess and killed both her and her dragon, something which both Vaegon and Aemma chastised him for. Elaena’s mother Rhaenys, who joined the cause of Rhaenyra, was especially furious, and she flew to Harrenhal to propose a move to her cousin. Soon enough, an assassin tied to Daemon’s former City Watch appeared in the royal chambers, and took King Aegon’s son’s life.

Green King blamed the death of Jaehaerys the Younger on his Hand, and soon enough, Prince Vaegon was replaced with someone he saw as more decisive in war – his own brother Aemond. After that, they took the initiative, with Prince Daeron flying south to help loyal Lord Hightower, and his two elder siblings marching on Black castles in the Crownlands to lure the Black Queen to her death…

But instead, Princess Rhaenys came. She wished to personally kill King Aegon for his crimes, and while she nearly succeeded in burning him to death, Aemond’s intervention not only prevented that, but led to her own death as well. With that, a woman who nearly became Queen Regnant died in battle, but she still put a man who approved of her daughter’s death into a realm of misery.

With Aegon deeply wounded, Aemond became his Prince Regent in addition to being Hand, and soon enough marched to Harrenhal to dispose of his hated uncle Daemon, the one he was jealous of. At the same time, parts of Vaegon’s plan started to come to fruition. A hired fleet of a Triarchy, recently formed union between Lys, Myr and Tyrosh, attacked Blacks sieging the Gullet Sea.

Black fleet, the strongest one at the time, which put lowborn of the capital into a hunger, was smashed by sellsails, but at a great cost. Prince Jaehaerys the Elder, recently returned from Winterfell, burned much of foreign ships with his Vermax, but a scorpion bolt to its eye felled the beast, and took its rider with it. Yet another ally of Rhaenyra was dead, but it wasn’t yet over.

For when Aemond reached Harrenhal, he found it abandoned. Soon he would learn that Daemon left the castle alongside his royal niece-wife leaving Dragonstone, and together they overwhelmed the defenses of King’s Landing. With that, Rhaenyra would finally take the Iron Throne while remnant Greens were stuck in Riverlands and the Reach. But her reign wouldn’t last long.

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For the only time in all Westerosi history, a woman sat the Iron Throne.

After Rhaenyra’s quick coronation, she did everything to consolidate her power. Many Greens were executed, including Vaegon, while two other Queens were put in chains. But, for some reason, King Aegon was missing, and so were his sibling-children… and most of all, nearly all of capital’s gold had disappeared as well, forcing the Black Queen to raise taxes, with disastrous consequences.

It would eventually be found out that the Green King and his remaining children had split up to hide in different places. Jaehaera the Younger fled to Storm’s End, where she would spend remainder of the war, while Maelor was taken by Ser Rickard to Oldtown, but unfortunately, on his way he was torn in parts by a crazed mob. Aegon the Elder, meanwhile, took the most dangerous path…

But let us first see what Daeron the Daring did all that time. He, alongside Lord Hightower, was slowly removing any potential threat in the Reach while marching on King’s Landing, the biggest foe of Rhaenyra at the time. So, it wasn’t surprising that soon enough she dispatched her cousin Jaehaera the Elder to destroy his host, which she did at the cost of her own life.

With Reachmen forced back to their castles, Aemond remained, but not for long. Daemon returned to Harrenhal, where the last brother of Green King was slowly defeating scattered riverlords, and forced a duel on him, which ended like the one between Daeron and Elder Jaehaera. These hard-won victories further weakened Rhaenyra’s grasp on King’s Landing, which soon ended in disaster…

While paranoid Queen was searching for her enemy half-brother, smallfolk suffered under grievous taxes used for the war. Soon enough, they started searching for another ruler, and that’s when Shepherd stepped in. One of the remaining Poor Fellows, he taught the same things his predecessors once did in Aenys’s reign, that Targaryens were polygamous abominations and so were their beasts.

His flock grew bigger and bigger, but they remained content… until Queen Helaena died. She couldn’t bear news of her brothers dying at the hand of Blacks, and that shattered her innocent and child-like worldview. With her falling on the spikes surrounding the Red Keep, Rhaenyra was only blamed further, and so an open rebellion against her rule started.

While dragons could’ve stopped that unwashed rabble, they were unfortunately locked in the Dragonpit, where they were slowly slained one by one. Soon, even city guards were overwhelmed by a sheer number of Shepherd’s followers, and the Black Queen was forced to flee the capital with her sole remaining son (Prince Viserys was captured by the Triarchy and believed dead at the time, like in false history).

And so, Aegon the Younger and his mother secretly travelled to Duskendale, where she sold her crown for a ship to Dragonstone… unaware it was already taken. There, instead of late Daemon’s daughter and her castellan, she found her royal brother, Aegon the Elder, alongside a few of his own men. But how did he do that?

It would be later revealed that after the fall of King’s Landing, King Aegon took a small boat with some of the Greens, and slowly advanced towards the island, where she bought the loyalty of a disgruntled captain of the guard, who was singled out by Larys Strong. Together, in the black of night, they performed a brief coup, and put Baela under guard after a brief dragon fight.

With that, any hope Rhaenyra had was shattered. Her half-brother took her prisoner, fucked her several times in a humiliating way to show her woman’s place, and then, knowing she would never be his loyal consort, fed her to his dragon and made her son watch. And so that was how the Black Queen’s rule had ended, and the Green King, Aegon the Elder, remained in power… at a great cost.

Chapter Text

With Rhaenyra dead, her younger half-brother Aegon finally won the Iron Throne, but King’s Landing still needed to be liberated from the Shepherd’s flock.

Thankfully, last powerful green lord, Borros Baratheon, finally finished off Dornish raiders and marched north. He easily breached weakened gates of the city and cut through the unwashed rabble with his knights, and saved the Red Keep, which was besieged at the time, with only Kingsguards, remnants of the City Watch and Queen Aemma as its protectors.

Shepherd himself was captured in that attack and taken as prisoner, at least until the Green King returned from Dragonstone. Then, the fanatic was burned on a stake, with his last words being curses towards Baratheon and Aegon the Elder. “Your reign will end the next year,” he said, and somehow, he turned out to be correct…

War was more important at the time, though. Most hosts of the realm were shattered – Hightowers by Jaehaera the Elder, Lannisters by riverlords in campaign already described by other maesters, riverlords themselves by Aemond, kingslanders by Aegon the Elder himself… Yet, two Black armies still remained. Starks marched south to fight in the name of slain Rhaenyra, and so were Arryns.

So, Lord Baratheon went to engage them, leaving King Aegon in the castle, where he desperately attempted to produce more babes. His mother-wife was always eager to make love to her eldest and most beloved son (uncaring of his many flaws), screaming his name harder than his father’s or hers. Still, she was getting older and less capable of making heirs, and so he had to think...

At that time, much of Targaryen dynasty had been killed in numerous battles. Only two males remained, the King himself and Rhaenyra’s eldest son also named Aegon (his brother Viserys was in captivity of Lyseni at the time, something not known by others). Daemon’s twin daughters, Baela and Rhaena, were on Dragonstone and in the Eyrie respectively, and Princess Jaehaera was in Storm’s End.

But who to marry, King Aegon thought. His daughter was yet too young, and he needed heir as fast as possible, to deprive his captive of that position. Twins were two years shy of womanhood, but while Baela was closer, she was also much wilder and unpredictable… That left him with the only possible strategy. Continue trying with his royal mother, and get Rhaena from the Vale for betrothal.

Yet unfortunately, all these plans were soon foiled. Princess’s egg finally hatched, and her new dragon meant it wasn’t so easy to just take her from the Eyrie. At the same time, Lord Borros was defeated by Cregan Stark, and the last Green army was scattered just eight days from King’s Landing. Aemma urged her husband-son to kill Aegon the Younger, but he declined, for reason no one can say to this day.

So, it wasn’t surprising that only a few days after news of Baratheon’s defeat reached the capital, King Aegon II was found poisoned, his chalice still on his bed with some milk of the poppy still there. His former allies eagerly opened the gates to the Blacks, hoping that Lord Stark would reward them for killing his foe…

That didn’t happen. Honorable and dutiful Cregan instead detained them and judged for kingslaying, a grave sin that sent them all to the Wall. Then, he released Rhaenyra’s son and proclaimed him to be King Aegon, the Third of His Name. And to ensure the peace between two factions, he arranged a marriage between him and Jaehaera, last surviving child of the Green King, before leaving for Winterfell.

And that is how the greatest war during all of Targaryen rule, named “the Dance of Dragons” thereafter, ended. In this conflict, many Targaryens died, even more lords and thousands of smallfolk, and dragons became nearly extinct. And thanks to the war, only male heir was permitted to sit the throne now.

Chapter Text

While Aegon III’s turbulent regency and solemn reign are already well described by other maesters, his relationships with other Targaryens are not nearly as well known.

His most important marriage was the one with Jaehaera, his cousin, the one that started cold and aloof. When Queen Aemma was still alive, she actively forbade her daughter from spending time with the King, but once Vaegon’s daughter succumbed to a Winter Fever, they started bonding. Both Aegon and his new wife were broken by the recent war, and while they weren’t of age yet, they still slowly bonded.

While two royals found solace in their awkward hugs, Princess Baela and her Velaryon friends travelled Free Cities. In Lys, they stumbled upon Magister Lysandro Rogare, who showed them something they didn’t expect… Prince Viserys, alive and well in his captivity. After negotiations and a hefty ransom, King’s brother was brought back home, with Aegon having his first fit of joy in ages.

Baela was also impressed how much her cousin changed during his absence. He was a frail child once, but now he was strong and capable, and he retained his wit as well… Slowly, they started bonding, and soon enough they proclaimed their intention to marry once they would get older. With that, Targaryen dynasty, nearly exterminated before that, started to slowly heal.

It is fairly well-known how Aegon and Jaehaera consummated their marriage, thanks in part to Grand Maester Munkun. They started very hesitantly, with him groping her teats and kissing her on the mouth, but soon enough, all the indecisiveness was gone. Both of war-broken cousins finally found a way to remove the pain inside of them, and soon enough they were having sex non-stop in their chambers.

Viserys’s marriage, on the other hand, was fiery from the start. They were constantly struggling for domination in their sex, with moans heard in all of Red Keep. Prince especially loved burying himself in Baela’s giant breasts, which alongside her twin sister’s were two of the biggest in the realm, and Princess found his cock to be ideal for her own pleasure… at least, at the time.

Soon enough, both pairs started birthing babes. Queen Jaehaera produced two sons (Daeron and Baelor) and three daughters (Daena, Rhaena and Elaena), while Princess Baela managed to give her cousin-husband two sons (Aegon and Aemon) and a single, gentle daughter Naerys. Even then, taking care of them only slowed down their passionate embraces, at least until some children came of age.

Even though King Aegon III was older, it took time for him and Jaehaera to truly get comfortable in their family love, and so Viserys’s offspring was born earlier. When they matured, Prince Aegon took his mother as his wife, and Naerys became her father’s partner, angering her younger brother. So, unexpectedly, Aemon broke off betrothal to his aunt, and joined the Kingsguard, to be with his sister.

These unions were rockier, however. Lusty Prince Aegon had a longer dick than his father and could satisfy Baela better, but he was much more dismissive of her needs and was interested in all of his relatives, which made his mother-wife despise him for lack of attention. Still, they had sex together, first of love but soon after out of duty, with one of them conceiving their son Daeron.

Naerys’s union, while a bit more filled with love, was also much more fragile. She was a weak and sickly girl who could faint from an orgasm, and so her father-husband did her less often than her mother, only three times a day and not seven. Despite all the fears, she still got pregnant, and nearly died birthing twins. One of them died in cradle, but another lived, Princess soon named Daenerys.

Little did Viserys know, however, that with Aemon she rarely ever had these troubles. Her valiant brother, who devoted himself to her body and hers only, mated her those four times her father-husband wasn’t with her, and all these times she felt calm and complete.

Chapter Text

KING AEGON TARGARYEN, Third of His Name,

His sister-wife, QUEEN JAEHAERA,

• Their eldest son, PRINCE DAERON, called The Elder,
• Their youngest son, PRINCE BAELOR,
• Their eldest daughter, PRINCESS DAENA,
• Their middle daughter, PRINCESS RHAENA, called The Younger,
• Their youngest daughter, PRINCESS ELAENA,

His brother, PRINCE VISERYS,

Viserys’s cousin-wife, PRINCESS BAELA,

• Their eldest son, PRINCE AEGON, also Baela’s husband-son,
• Their youngest son, PRINCE AEMON, of Kingsguard,
• Their only daughter, PRINCESS NAERYS, also Viserys’s daughter-wife,

Baela’s branch:

PRINCESS BAELA TARGARYEN, King Aegon III’s cousin,

Her husband-son, PRINCE AEGON,

• Their only son, PRINCE DAERON, called The Younger,

Her sister, PRINCESS RHAENA, called The Elder.

Chapter Text

Although Aegon III’s death from illness was sudden, his eldest son eagerly awaited a moment he would be able to sit the Iron Throne, to enact what he wanted for a very long time.

In spite of the fact, he was still two years shy of his manhood during his coronation, Daeron still rejected the regency. Instead, he focused his eyes at Dorne, the last independent realm in Westeros, and proposed a plan to conquer it. Even though many were unsure, especially with dragons having died off during his father’s reign, the King only remarked they didn’t need these beasts.

Indeed, the dragon was Daeron himself. So, in less than a year, his host and the one of Lord Tyrell marched into the mountains, using goat paths in place of actual roads. Alyn Velaryon sailed to the Greenblood, the main Dornish river, and used his fleet to divide this realm. Lyonel took the very heart of the region, Daeron – the Sunspear, and with that the conquest seemed to be over.

But as soon as the King returned to the capital and married his mother, Dornishmen rose. Lyonel Tyrell was slain, his forces were scattered in the desert, and Daeron was forced to return. He defeated his foe once again, but while discussing their capitulation under a peace banner, his treacherous enemies cut him down, and took his Kingsguard cousin as a prisoner.

Although at that time Daeron was already married to Jaehaera for two years, his business at Dorne meant he couldn’t give his mother-wife a babe. So, his brother Baelor ascended as King, but instead or remarrying the Queen or his sisters, he travelled to Dorne to make peace. Dornish Prince accepted the end of the war and release of Aemon, but only if hostages would be provided.

So, Prince Daeron and Daenerys were sent to Sunspear, and Dorne remained free, but barefoot travels of the King in the desert took toll on him. Upon returning, he started building Great Sept in the capital, started fasting every other week, and imprisoned all his female kin in the Red Keep, frightened that they would tempt him to sin. That didn’t stop any of them, however.

Daena, later called Defiant, had the biggest teats of that Targaryen generation, and regularly escaped on her own to have fun with the family, most of all her sex-obsessed cousin Aegon. While they did have discreet sex in the taverns of King’s Landing while the King slept, soon enough her growing belly was discovered, which bore a child named Daemon, for the ancestor she wanted to fuck the most.

Rhaena and Elaena, her younger sisters, weren’t that beautiful. Sure, the latter had the fattest arse of the realm, but the former wasn’t that special with her only head-sized breasts… Still, Aegon managed to sneak and fuck even them, producing another two sons – Aegor and Brynden, who would soon become one of the most important bastards of all time.

King Baelor was broken by these news, to the point of starving himself to death while fasting for their purity (although some claim his uncle did that to gain the throne). With that, the male line of Aegon III had ended, and although some wished to put Daena on the throne, many still remembered the Dance and so allowed Prince Viserys, now Second of That Name, to sit the Iron Throne.

His reign started promising, but after half a year he himself perished, widely believed to be the work of his son who craved power. King Aegon IV he was, soon to be called the Unworthy, and he never had any Queen during his own rule. Instead, he kept his cousins and sister around as lovers, and soon enough produced, what he himself called “an army of bastards”.

And while he did that (something we would cover a little bit later), his only trueborn son Daeron spent time with his sister-wife Daenerys at Dorne, learning all the positions from more perverse Rhoynar and rule from the Prince of the realm. Little did anyone know he would be his father’s greatest enemy…

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KING AEGON TARGARYEN, the Fourth of His Name, 

His mother-wife, {QUEEN BAELA}, disappeared at sea,

• Their only son, PRINCE DAERON, Daenerys’s brother-husband,

His eldest cousin-paramour, PRINCESS DAENA, 

• Their bastard son, DAEMON WATERS,

His middle cousin-paramour, PRINCESS RHAENA,

• Their bastard son, BRYNDEN WATERS,

His youngest cousin-paramour, PRINCESS ELAENA,

• Their bastard son, AEGOR WATERS,

His brother, PRINCE AEMON, of Kingsguard,

His sister, PRINCESS NAERYS,

Her father-husband, {KING VISERYS II}, died in his sleep, 

• Their daughter, PRINCESS DAENERYS, Daeron's sister-wife, heavily pregnant, 

Daeron and Daenerys's children:

Their only son, PRINCE BAELOR,

Their only daughter, PRINCESS JAENAERA. 

Chapter Text

King Aegon IV, in spite of his duties, spent much of his reign doing one thing – breeding his relatives.

He never loved restrictions placed by marriage on any man, including himself. Sure, he married his late mother years ago, but that was enforced by his father, and that resulted in the birth of a man he hated the most – Prince Daeron. So, while he was the King, Aegon never married, and instead made love to all his relatives-paramours, some of them more and some less.

Out of all of them, his eldest cousin Daena was the closest to being the Queen. She supported her King the most, and fucked him whenever and wherever he wanted, always allowing him to bury his long cock in her gigantic bosom (biggest of the generation) and release inside her womb. So, in addition to Daemon, she birthed four daughters to him, none of whom inherited her huge teats and arse.

Elaena was second, and served more so as a mistress of whisperers and sort of spymaster to him. Aegon didn’t respect her that much, and only noticed her giant cheeks that he couldn’t help but fuck. Still, the Princess was fine with that, seducing him with her bottom whenever she wanted something, and through that becoming second woman in the realm. She never had children beside Aegor.

Rhaena, last of Aegon III’s daughters, wasn’t as loved by her cousin as her sisters. She was too timid and pious, like her late brother, and so rarely ever joined in on the fun, at most having fun once every three days (unlike seven times a day like Daena and once for Elaena). Her breasts and arse only grew bigger than her head with pregnancies – alongside Brynden, she also gave life to three daughters.

But even she was more liked by the King in bed than his sister, Queen Dowager Naerys. She was much frailer than Rhaena, and many years ago nearly died birthing her father-husband a daughter. So, Viserys II never touched her again to ensure her safety, but when Aegon became ruler and took her as her lover, she soon became pregnant and died in childbirth, with her Kingsguard brother disappearing soon after.

All that family fun ended when Prince of Dorne died, and his heir Princess Myriah released Daeron and Daenerys from their comfortable imprisonment. No longer were they just two young siblings hopelessly in love with each other – they were brother and sister bound in marriage, with the former having knowledge of every position to compensate for his cock and the latter being as beautiful as Daena.

When they returned to King’s Landing, they found it in disarray from the King’s escapades. Soon enough, they became his biggest critics, and prevented him from doing many follies, like using mechanical dragons to invade Dorne, or inviting every single noble family for a depraved orgy in the Red Keep, and that opposition to his hedonism soon caused Aegon to go against him.

Soon, rumors started spreading about Prince Daeron being an illegitimate child, who was born from Aemon, not her nephew-husband, mating his aunt Baela. Many didn’t believe it, considering even at the time legendary love the Dragonknight had for Naerys was well-known, but still latched onto it, considering an heir to the throne to be a Dornish weakling unworthy of the crown.

The rest of his reign was nearly all the same – Aegon eating and drinking, mating his cousins in all possible holes, and arguing with his own son about the realm. That lifestyle soon made him sick and obese, unable to walk even three steps, and one by one his paramours abandoned him, with Princess Daena being the last to do his weakening cock.

On the deathbed, however, he did something drastic. He legitimized all his bastards, be it lad or maid, giving them not only an ability to marry their trueborn mothers, but to contest the throne as well… One only wonders why he didn’t disinherit Daeron (possibly because he had too many followers who would contest that), but the damage was done. Soon, Westeros would crack once again.

Chapter Text

As soon as Daeron II’s coronation has ended, three weddings followed suit, between trueborn mothers and their recently legitimized sons.

Princess Daena finally got what she wished for, marrying a relative who looked and behaved the most like Daemon Targaryen. She moaned and screamed hardest for her husband-son, and he himself treated her in any way she wanted, be it gentle or rough, with her teat-fucks being his favorite. Soon, his mother-wife gave him seven children, to honor seven gods.

Elaena, meanwhile, was teasing her husband and son Aegor by only saying his name if he lasted more than seven hours. While he, a giant brute who could slaughter anyone on the battlefield, believed to be the dominate one in their marital bed, it was his mother-wife who manipulated him, making him do whatever errands needed to even get into her cunt. Unfortunately, they never had any children.

Finally, marriage of Brynden and Rhaena was the quietest of them. Weirdest and most secretive of all the bastards, he rarely ever showed emotions, only to people he respected like the King, and his beloved mother-wife. He spent days with her, sometimes without others knowing (and finding out only by their seed-stains), something which made shy and pious Princess love him even more.

Unfortunately, while Daena had seven children, Queen Daenerys had eight, four sons and four daughters. These pregnancies only made her teats even bigger, and that coupled with her aunt’s aging, made her the new most attractive woman in Westeros. This jealousy inside the older Princess is now believed to be one of the main causes of the upcoming civil war, but there was an even bigger one…

After his coronation, both royal siblings started long meetings with Dornish ones, both in King’s Landing and Sunspear. In the end, they managed to negotiate Dorne’s admittance to the Seven Kingdoms, but at a cost. Princess Myriah and her brother-husband Maron were to remain rulers of the region, and quite a lot of economical and political liberties were implemented for the last independent part of Westeros.

That angered quite a lot of men, especially those of the Dornish Marches. Dorne was meant to be conquered, like both Dragons intended, and they were way too different to ever warrant any privilege. First and foremost of them was Aegor, and soon he, his mother-wife and Princess Daena convinced the eldest bastard, Daemon, to claim the throne usurped by a son of Prince Aemon…

Brynden, however, didn’t join them, and ordered their arrest for treason. Thanks to a help from Glendon Ball, they all escaped the capital and regrouped south, where they were joined by the growing followers of urgently crowned “King” Daemon. After marching back to the capital and defeating several smaller enemies, most of all Damon Lannister, they finally came upon a bigger army at the Redgrass Field, led by Targaryens themselves.

Prince Baelor, King Daeron’s eldest son, led it, and at first much more hardened by war rebels were winning. But Daemon’s honor with his enemies slowed him down, and helped Brynden (soon after called Bloodraven) to get his archers on a hill and perform a surprise attack. Rebel King died thanks to an arrow in his chest, and his eldest twin brother-sons shared the same fate.

It wasn’t over yet, though. Prince Maekar, youngest son of the true King, finally arrived and attacked from behind, scattering their foe. Still, Aegor managed to end chaos in the ranks and attacked the hill, taking Brynden by surprise and using his enemies' confusion to escape the battlefield. Soon, Daemon's remnants reached the shore of the Narrow Sea, where ships hired by rebel Lord Bracken had just arrived, and escaped to the safety of the Free Cities.

There, his exiles and the ones forced by King Daeron afterward plotted their eventual return together. "King" Daemon’s children, named Blackfyres in an honor of a Valyrian sword gifted to him by Aegon IV during his knighting, were joined by Aegor Bittersteel and two Princesses (Daena and Elaena), and not just in scheming…

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KING DAERON TARGARYEN, the Second of His Name,

His daughter-wife, QUEEN JAENAERA,

• Their only son, PRINCE MATARYS,

His former sister-wife, QUEEN DAENERYS,

Her husband-son, PRINCE BAELOR,

• Their only son, PRINCE VALARR,
• Their only daughter, PRINCESS KIERA,

Other children of Daeron and Daenerys:

Their second son, PRINCE AERYS, Aelinor’s brother-husband,

Their second daughter, PRINCESS AELINOR, Aerys’s sister-wife,

Their third son, PRINCE RHAEGEL, Alyssa’s brother-husband,

Their third daughter, PRINCESS ALYSSA, Rhaegel’s sister-wife,

• Their only son, PRINCE AELOR,
• Their eldest daughter, PRINCESS AELORA,
• Their youngest daughter, PRINCESS DAENORA,

Their fourth son, PRINCE MAEKAR, Daena’s brother-husband,

Their fourth daughter, PRINCESS DAENA, Maekar’s sister-wife,

• Their eldest son, PRINCE DAERON,
• Their youngest son, PRINCE AERION,
• Their eldest daughter, PRINCESS DAELLA,
• Their youngest daughter, PRINCESS RHAE.

Chapter Text

For a while everything in Westeros after the First Blackfyre Rebellion was calm and peaceful, but soon enough problems came.

It all started when Prince Baelor, beloved heir to the throne and his father’s hand, fell in a mishap during a tourney. His mother-widow wept, as he was even better in bed than King Daeron, and the realm was cheated of one of the greatest rulers possible. So, his brother-son Valarr became new Prince of Dragonstone, but then the Great Spring Sickness came.

He was the first to perish during the outbreak, with Matarys, son of the King and his daughter-wife, following suit. Valarr’s pregnant sister-widow also gave stillborn sons, something many suspected (but rarely said) to be work of Bloodraven. Then, Daeron and Daenerys also caught the disease, giving their second son Aerys an opportunity to become the ruler.

Unfortunately, he never cared that much about matters of the realm, leaving them in Brynden’s care, and the same could said about his sister-wife Aelinor. Although many urged for him to create an heir, he was more interested in reading, including obscene literature about his distant ancestors. Many joked at the time he would rather fuck Daenys the Dreamer, but maesters indicate that was indeed real.

With him disinterred in children, his brother Rhaegel was heir for a time. He suffocated during a feast, however, leaving both his sister and their daughter as widows. Two years later, his son Aelor was accidentally killed by his sister-wife, making her go mad in grief. Still, on Brynden’s advice he made poor Aelora his heir to spite Prince Maekar, but she was slain during a ball soon after.

Much is said already about Second and Third Blackfyre Rebellions, so we can safely go forward, to the death of King Aerys. It was sudden and happened in his sleep, with his youngest brother Maekar returning to the capital to claim the crown. He also married widowed Aelinor, mayhaps in an attempt to make her much happier than during her bookworm brother’s rule.

Indeed, the Queen was so happy to be finally mated with someone she gladly accepted the new King, even if he was stern and unlikable. For Maekar, however, this seemed as more of a duty. He was in love with his sister Daena, who tragically died many years ago, and while Aelinor looked decent and had Valyrian breasts and arse, he still longed for what he lost…

Unlike previous King, Maekar had children of his own. The eldest was Daeron, named after his grandfather. He was married to his sister Daella, and even though he always liked their marital bed, what he longer for the most was the bottle. Together they had a daughter, Vaella, and although he had an intention to marry her and give her hundreds of heirs, he soon died from a strange disease.

Second was Aerion, a cruel Prince who only saw his sister-wife as teats, arse and a womb to produce many sons. Only one came though, named Maegor as a provocation, before he consumed wildfire in an attempt to become a dragon. His younger brother Aemon, meanwhile, was sent to the Citadel, where he was trained to be a maester.

But the youngest one was the most peculiar. Aegon, or Egg, travelled much of his youth squiring for a hedge knight named Dunk, and as such was close to smallfolk as was his uncle Baelor. After coming of age, he married his similarly-minded and beautiful cousin Kiera (the same one that birthed Valarr’s twins) and together they a lot of children, about whom we’ll talk later.

Although Maekar’s rule was largely peaceful (in spite of his war-minded nature), he perished like he always wanted – in a fight. A stone hurled from a besieged castle of rebellious House Peake slain him, and with that, another round of succession crisis began…

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KING MAEKAR TARGARYEN, the First of His Name,

His eldest son, {PRINCE DAERON}, died of disease,

Daeron’s sister-widow, PRINCESS DAELLA,

• Their daughter, PRINCESS VAELLA,

His second son, {PRINCE AERION}, died drinking wildfire,

Aerion’s sister-widow, PRINCESS RHAE,

• Their son, PRINCE MAEGOR,

His third son, MAESTER AEMON,

His youngest son, PRINCE AEGON,

His cousin-wife, PRINCESS KIERA,

• Their eldest son, PRINCE DUNKAN,
• Their middle son, PRINCE JAEHAERYS,
• Their eldest daughter, PRINCESS SHAENA,
• Their youngest son, PRINCE DAERON,
• Their youngest daughter, PRINCESS RHAELLE.

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With Maekar’s death, problems of succession soon resulted in the second and last Great Council.

First candidate out of all his descendants was Princess Vaella, with her mother backing her up as a potential regent. Yet, she was half-witted, and a woman besides, so every lord gathered ignored her. Prince Maegor’s claim was more popular, but many believed he would inherit his father’s madness, and no one wanted unstable and long regency like in the age of Aegon III.

That left two main candidates. Aemon was older, but bound by his oaths to being a maester, and while some wanted him to abandon them, the Prince didn’t want to usurp his beloved brother. As for him, Aegon, in spite of being closest to an actual heir, travelled too long alongside peasants and servants for many, and was widely seen as half-wild.

Still, in spite of that, Aegon V and Kiera won the vote (thanks in part to their extremely captivating sexual performance, something other candidates couldn’t do thanks to their oaths or being underage) and ascended as King and Queen. Together, two Targaryens who understood the lowest of Westerosi the best, with Kiera inheriting Baelor’s humble nature, decided to do what they wanted for a long time.

Give more rights to the smallfolk. Although their intentions were good, most nobles blocked their efforts, forcing them into finding a way to bring dragons… As for their personal life, Aegon and Kiera had five children together, three boys and two daughters, those that would be their joy and their bane for the rest of their reign.

While polygamy was now legal for House Targaryen, its presence greatly diminished since the Dance. Kings and princes only married one relative, and often divorced like simple Andals if they craved another. So, when Prince Duncan (named after King’s best friend) and Shaena became of age, they were betrothed to their mother and father, with secondborn son Jaehaerys getting Rhaelle.

But, after these ceremonies, they craved more. Duncan Targaryen loved his beautiful mother-wife, but his youngest sister made his cock even harder than before. Similarly, Shaena didn’t hate her father-husband and often took pleasure from him entering her womb, but it was Jaehaerys she wanted to feel inside… So, one day, they snuck out into the summer residence of Summerhall and did it.

Once news came of their children doing a second wedding in secret, King and Queen were surprised, but didn’t annul it, instead liking the idea of a full-on family orgy. In such annual events at Summerhall, King Aegon released his seed into his daughter-wife while Jaehaerys covered her face in cum, while Prince Duncan was getting a double teat-fuck, trying to decide if his mother-wife or Rhaelle are bigger.

But aside from such cases of group fucking, there was another thing they did in that southern castle. We can only deduce what they were planning from incomplete accounts of Summerhall’s maester and the general direction of their policies. It seems like both Aegon and Kiera wanted to enforce the rights of lowborn by awakening dragon eggs.

Much like other attempts to resurrect these beasts, it ended in failure. One time, when they brought pyromancers from beyond the Narrow Sea, a great fire engulfed the castle, taking lives of King Aegon, Queen Kiera, their heir Duncan and his sister-wife Rhaelle. Thankfully, Jaehaerys and Shaena managed to escape, and so did their recently of age children, Aerys and Rhaella.

Soon, second and only surviving son of Aegon V was crowned Jaehaerys II, and he took his daughter as his wife immediately after coronation. Aerys proposed the same to Queen Shaena, although their mother-son marriage was unhappy and ended with her dying in childbirth. The King also didn’t outlive her that much, dying on his son-grandson Rhaegar’s first name day. A beginning of the end.

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After a brief and unnotable reign of Jaehaerys II, many looked to his son Aerys with anticipation, not knowing he would soon turn into a Mad King.

At first, however, he was seen as a charismatic young man with a decent cock length, who lost his virginity to Queen Shaena, his mother-wife, but couldn’t spend much time with her thanks to her death in childbirth. Their only surviving child, a frail babe, was named Rhaegar, and for quite a while he would be the only son of King Aerys II.

His sister Rhaella, a woman with fairly big teats but not as huge as many of her famed ancestors, for a while was beloved daughter-wife of Jaehaerys II. Once he died, it is said by Grand Maester Pycelle she wept for days, but soon that would change. Aerys, wishing to continue mating his relatives, soon took her as a sister and wife, necessary union for the last female Targaryen at a time, but still a tragic one.

Early reign of Aerys the Scab can be characterized by a jealousy he felt towards much more capable Hand Tywin. Although he saw an appointment of a man who brutally suppressed rebellion of Reynes and Tarbecks in the west as rational at first, eventually Lannister started getting more recognition for his policies, most of all removal of many smallfolk rights, feeding into King’s growing hatred of him.

Another problem presented itself wen Queen Rhaella started giving him babes. He was happy at first, both knowing he got more heirs and future wives… but then, they all started to die before leaving the cradle. That made him angrier and angrier, and soon enough their daily sex sessions, done with little pleasure in both, turned into weekly ones.

At the same time, Prince Rhaegar had finally started maturing, and thanks to that the Queen started noticing him more. As soon as he came of age, an heir requested to become second husband of Rhaella, only to be brutally declined by jealous Aerys. That didn’t stop their sexual relationship behind his back, and one day, an opportunity presented itself.

Lord Darklyn of Duskendale, who lamented the decline of his port town, under influence of his bookish sister-wife requested a charter to transform it into a Free City. Aerys saw it as a slight, and while Tywin Lannister begged for him not to go, his hatred blinded him and so he rode there. That was a trap – a Kingsguard that went with him was slain, and the King became Lord Denys’s captive.

During that time, Rhaegar and Rhaella married discreetly, and while the Hand had his army surround the city, many believed that would be the end of Targaryen fool… But Barristan Selmy bravely rescued Aerys from the castle, and when its defenders capitulated with no possible options left, the King ensured no Darklyns would be left alive.

Soon after Queen’s second marriage, she suddenly started birthing more and more babes. Prince Viserys came first, with Aerys claiming it was his, which only fueled father-son rivalry. Rhaenys, Aegon and Daenerys would be next, with the latter one being born months after her father’s death on the Trident, on a Dragonstone surrounded by an enemy fleet.

This conflict peaked during tourney at Harrenhal. Lord Whent wanted for it to be biggest in the realm, but many suspected another motive. Many believed Prince Rhaegar wanted to organize a new Grand Council to discuss his royal father’s growing madness, which forced King Aerys to go there and present himself to lords for the first time since Duskendale.

Much is already said about both that tourney and Robert’s Rebellion that followed, a response to Aerys’s demand of sending Lord Baratheon’s head for the crimes of his friends. This war ended Targaryen rule in Westeros, and brought Stormlanders onto the Iron Throne.

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Finally, he reached the age of Mad Aerys. After that, Perestan put out his feather, got up and looked at the window. King Robert would be next, and although he had some ideas, it was way harder for him to write. After all, Targaryens were exiled and nearly extinct, with not many people still remembering details of their lineage, but Baratheons…

How would anyone explain the fact that Robert’s Queen was not his relative?

He thought about that for a moment. Yes, he had some Estermont cousins, many female ones in fact, but most readers would surely just look at the real Queen to prove him wrong. Maybe Baratheons and Lannisters ruled together, like the latter now did with Tyrells? No, that still wasn’t right. Disappointed, Perestan then left his chamber to get some fresh air.

There, he stumbled upon Alleras and Lazy Leo, two young Acolytes, having a heated debate. The former defended his people, noting that although Dornishmen have only a head-size breasts, their arses are huge and fat, and the latter instead lusted over Reachwomen’s teats, proudly declaring them to be the biggest in the world after Valyrian ones.

And that’s when Archmaester Perestan got an idea.

He went back to his papers and crossed out his ideas about King Robert, now determined to make the rest of his unfinished book a guide to nations of his planet, their breast and arse sizes, cock length… and different ways to make family love, too.

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First Men, named so because they were first to settle Westeros, now consist of three main groups – Northmen, Wildlings of different types and Crannogmen.

These people are believed to have come west from the Great Grass Sea, and were the main inhabitants of the continent before the Andals came. In that time, not only did they worship unnamed gods and wrote in runes, but also freely practiced polygamy with their relatives (like how Ronard the Bastard married all his sisters, or Lymond Hightower did the same with daughters).

Andal conquest, however, meant that all remnants of that culture remained either north of the Neck, or in the mountains of the Vale. Only their worship survived to our days (with Blackwoods as the only – mostly – Andal exception that still follow the old gods), with rune writing and polygamous marriages soon being phased out and replaced by the new rulers of Westeros.

The most numerous group of remnant First Men are the ones that inhabit much of the North. Their men are known for long and girthy cocks second only to Dornishmen, and their women – for breasts only second to damsels of the Reach and fairly small arses. These features are attributed by maesters to cold weather in winters, with bigger production of milk to feed the babes or seed to produce offspring.

Their family sex is often noted as being colder than the one present in Andal relatives. Many say that “in the North, moans freeze your throat”, which is why ladies of the region rarely ever shout names of their fathers, brothers, uncles or cousins. Of note is “the pose of the wolf” – traditional position, often named an invention of Brandon the Builder, where ladies go down on all fours like these animals.

Men in-between this place and south are more peculiar. They are called crannogmen, and they live a more unusual lifestyle of hunting frogs in the swamps and moving their castles all by themselves. Their arrows are said to be covered in poisons not known to maesters, and their society is simpler, with many lowborn sharing homes with “nobles” and vice-versa.

Their women, unfortunately, are fairly small compared to other First Men, with breasts only roughly the size of their heads and barely wobbling arses, something which is mostly attributed to a lack of food in the region. Their men are also not that well-endowed, around six inches in most cases. Still, that doesn’t mean they don’t have any version of a family love, which is not well researched at the moment.

Even less is known about wildlings, who are often divided into three categories – true wildlings that live north of the Wall, Vale mountain clans and Stoneborn of Skagos, an island to the east of the North. Out of all of these, raiders from the extreme north are best researched, thanks to many works of Nights Watch maesters, while others are either dangerous, too isolated or both.

In many ways, these northern wildlings are similar to Northmen, but some of their habits are extremely weird. For example, most male relatives are expected to kidnap their mothers, sisters, aunts, cousins or daughters during marriage, to prove their strength, and if her new husband would prove to be cruel, she is allowed to slit his throat and free herself – a barbaric tradition to us southerners.

Skagosi and mountain clans are presumed to be similar. Reports from the raids made both by and on Arryn lands say that clan women are just as ferocious and big-breasted as the northern wildlings, with Stark tales about stoneborn sounding very similar. Research about their men is limited to only captives, but it seems to confirm these points.

These people are the husband-sons and daughter-wives of the winter, bred between each other to survive it. Still, they lost the fight for most of Westeros, to people with not bronze, but steel weapons and the faith of Seven behind them.

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Even with near-total Andal domination, one group of Westerosi remained staunchly different from both them and First Men – ironborn.

Their priests often tell of how different they are to “Greenlanders”, and that they got on the islands from beyond the Sunset Sea. Most maesters, however, believe it to be an ignorant superstition, and instead believe ironborn are a weird offshoot of First Men, which managed to preserve their culture even in spite of Andal invasion.

Instead of old or new gods, they believe in the Drowned God that rules all seas and oceans, and as such their culture is extremely tied to both of them. Due to that, nearly all those who live far away from the shore (like some branches of House Goodbrother) are despised, and some extremely devoted ones even believe that just dousing salt water on the head isn’t enough – a full drowning and resurrection is.

Their women rarely have big breasts or arse, for similar reasons as crannogmen – although some islands with many resources, mostly Great Wyk, have bigger females that approach the size of ladies on the continent. Their men, on the other hand, are as big as northmen, and most ironborn boast that they’re even longer than “these feeble wolves”.

Family sex on the islands seems to be something in the middle between Andal and First Men ones. Only one wife (be it mother, sister, daughter, aunt or cousin) is allowed, although usually the patriarch keeps his other relatives as concubines and sires bastards with them, those who eventually get ships of their own and continue raiding in the name of their trueborn kin.

Of note is an interesting tradition that is also tied to the sea. It is said that legendary Grey King invented it with one of his daughter-wives, and named it “ironman’s blowjob”. In it, a woman takes her male relative’s cock in her mouth and tries to last as long as possible without breathing. And although actual skill varies wildly, it is still well-known that iron women suck family cocks better than any other.

Now, it is time to describe their raiding, a main way of gaining wealth by ironmen. So-called “iron price” is the one taken not with gold, but by slaying an enemy, although some of them are used for other reasons. Families of the mainland are usually kidnapped and brought to work for their new masters as thralls, with their children usually freed and turned into smaller nobles.

This is the Old Way, the one practiced for thousands of years by the denizens of the archipelago, but Andal invasion presented another one. New Way is not nearly as popular, but still used by some Seven followers and educated minds – it is the same one as on the mainland, with no raiding and a (supposed) loyalty to a sole relative.

Cultural differences on the islands themselves are small but present. Weirdest ironborn are Farwynds of Lonely Light, the westernmost rock in the sea, as they often warg into whales and seals, but other than they fuck in the family the same way. Denizens of Great Wyk are also more similar to Andals in using less concubines, but their differences are still smaller than those who follow the New Way.

They also have influenced some of the regions closest to them. In the North, people inhabiting Cape Kraken, who lived a lot under their rule, occasionally still take their less loved relatives as paramours, while Mallisters of Seagard explicitly banned such a way to have sex in family. One western house, Kenning of Kayce, even goes back to a traitorous ironborn and his sister-wife.

But these people are just inhabitants of around a dozen islands in the Sunset Sea, even if occasionally important ones in the grand matter of things. Now, it is time to describe sizes and family sex of the most numerous group of people – Andals.

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While Andals aren’t nearly as interesting as cold and solemn First Men or rough and aggressive Ironborn, they are still notable for being one of the most successful people in the world.

They hail from the place named Andalos, roughly located between Norvos and the Axe peninsula. It was there these early Andals first formulated the faith of the Seven and created first steel weapons, those they seemingly got from neighboring Rhoynars. But, with Valyria expanding north, our ancestors had to choose between either death or enslavement. They chose to flee, instead.

Andals used all they could to build an armada of ships and escape their threatened homeland to a place promised to many prophets in their dreams for thousand years. It was the Vale of Arryn, and from there exiles slowly but surely spread to most of the continent, eventually enforcing their own culture on the First Men and becoming the dominant power of Westeros.

Unlike other nations of the continent, Andals explicitly forbid non-monogamous family marriages. Father Above only married his daughter The Maiden, septons say, and people under him must follow that dogma. And even though this habit caused a religious war that nearly robbed Targaryens of their kingdom, only a few followers of the Seven are explicitly loyal to their relative-wives…

Groups that comprise Andals are only a little less similar between each other than Ironmen, but there are still quite a lot of stereotypical depictions about the denizens of different regions of the south. These sub-nations are Westerlanders, Riverlanders, Valemen, Reachmen, Stormlanders and, to a lesser extent, Cracklaws of the Cracklaw Point.

Westerners are often believed to be proud and arrogant on the outside and extremely hungry for their relatives’ cocks and cunts on the inside. People of Stormlands are thought to be similar, but less extreme in both these qualities. Reachmen and denizens of the Vale are chivalrous and more devoted to their relative-wives, while in the Riverlands might in the bed is valued as much as on the battlefield.

As for the sizes, Reach ladies have the biggest breasts (three times the size of their heads, usually) and fattest arses, which can be attributed to the fertility of the land, and so women as well. Second place is usually divided between maids of Westerlands and the Vale, depending on the relative asked. Smallest breasts and arses are usually attributed to those born in Riverlands and Stormlands (only a head size).

Men are not very different in that regard, with knights of the Reach, West and the Vale being longer, and so let’s switch to the family sex habits instead. More chivalrous regions have quieter but more passionate fucking in traditional septon’s position (with a male relative on top of a female), while more depraved ones often incorporate other poses less approved by the Faith, with lots of screams.

Most unusual are the isolated people of the Cracklaw Point, those that still have quite a lot of First Men traits hidden under Andal coat. They are distrustful of the outsiders and often fuck under open air, not in castles or village houses. Their teats and cheeks aren’t nearly as big as in other regions, but that doesn’t stop families on the peninsula from mating each other.

While most Andals now live in Westeros, there are still traces of them in Essos. Closest to them are Pentoshi, who are mostly converted cousins of southerners under the rule of Valyrian magisters with bigger teats and longer cocks. Some remnants are also found on the island of Lorath that was briefly conquered by them in the past, but they are not as numerous there.

Before we would move to the remote lands, we must touch on the southernmost and most unusual group of people living on our continent. They also escaped from dragonlords, but that’s where similarities end. Those are Rhoynar.

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Even though we already described weird nations of Westeros, most notably Ironborn, all of them pale in comparison to Dornishmen, also called Rhoynar.

They are also originally from the east, namely a land surrounding the biggest river of the continent – Mother Rhoyne. There their ancestors practiced water magic and worshipped a set of turtle gods in the great cities and palaces (some of which are even commonly believed to have floated), at least until Valyrians came.

For thousands of years, they warred with each other, fire against water, but eventually dragonlords prevailed. Some were enslaved, others were forced into exile, which was already described during the naughty tale about Princess Nymeria and her brother-husband. Still, they came to Dorne and conquered it, eventually transferring their culture to whatever Westerosi who settled the desert.

Many of Dornish customs seem unusual for any other denizen of the continent, especially those regarding the inheritance. Unlike other regions, where eldest male brother-son, son-grandson or cousin-son goes before his female relatives, woman can become Lady or Princess in Dorne if she’s older than her siblings. Due to that, many daughter-wives are trained to be heirs, and not consorts to their kin.

Bastardy is also much more tolerated than in other parts of Westeros (save Iron Islands, mayhaps). While everywhere else illegitimate sons become knights or other kinds of warriors, and daughters are turned into serving women, in Dorne baseborn are often raised alongside legitimate children, and can even become paramours of trueborn relatives, instead of marrying each other with no other options.

While sub-cultures of Rhoynar can be quite distinct in some ways, only Dornishmen themselves are truly numerous. Others, be they Essosi remnants, Myrmen, settlers of the Isle of Women, or orphans of the Greenblood, can rarely be met outside of their small homes. Still, many of them are interesting enough to be mentioned here.

Those that remained on Rhoyne still cling to the ruins of their once grand civilization, like Goyan Drohe or Chroyane. They mostly depend on the help from neighboring Free Cities, like Pentos or Volantis, and due to a lack of food in their burned homes their arses became smaller with time. Something similar happened to inhabitants of Abulu, one of the small Summer Islands where Nymeria once stopped.

Those who helped found Myr were lucky, however. Valyrian colonists, in spite of policies back at Freehold, still allowed them to be free citizens. That helped them retain their giant bottoms that wobble with each step, but a great price. They weren’t allowed to rule this Free City, and soon enough forgot all traits of their culture, like equal inheritance or respect towards bastards.

But luckiest were those who went with Nymeria. In their new arid home they soon became the people with fattest cheeks, to a jealousy of women from the Reach and Westerlands. Their family sex also became the most diverse of all Westerosi, with numerous different positions, where maids could dominate their male relatives (even older ones) without any stigma from the Faith.

Some refugees, however, couldn’t accept losing his homeland even at the very end of the journey. They instead settle on the only big river of Dorne, named Greenblood, and built so-called “Planky Town”, a city of rafts and boats that cruise from one end of the water to another. They have the same habits as normal Dornishmen, but are less respectful of their authority.

With that, the description of main nations in Westeros is mostly over. Still, this part of the work is incomplete without noting the people which Targaryens themselves were a part of. These are Valyrians, the great masters of dragons.

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Anyone, from the Iron Islands to Yi Ti, if asked about what nations has the biggest breasts, would easily answer “Valyrians”.

These were once humble shepherds from the peninsula between the mouth of Rhoyne and Slavers Bay, but they lived alongside one of the most dangerous creatures of the world – dragons. Although some perished trying to fight them, most Valyrians managed to tame them and turn into their strongest weapons, those that helped conquer much of the world.

At its height so-called Freehold controlled many lands from Lorathi isles and Pentoshi hills to Ghiscari shores and remote Gogossos. Yet, that empire was completely destroyed by a cataclysm named just Doom, and while Valyrian-looking people still remained in several Free Cities, only one family of dragonlords named Targaryens survived and eventually conquered Westeros.

Unlike Andals or Rhoynar, denizens of this peninsula freely practiced polygamy, marrying every relative they could from parent to cousin. And while lowborn or dragonless Valyrians just did it in their homes, dragonriders that ruled the empire held annual contests of family orgies between each other, with winners getting absolute power and losers having to wait a year to contend others.

Although in normal Valyrians roles of men and women weren’t very different from ours, in dragonlords females had much more power. While they couldn’t inherit lands, they could fight in wars and serve as counselors to their relatives, and even could dominate males in bed whenever and wherever they wanted. Remnants of this still can be seen in some of the Free Cities.

As it was said before, Valyrian ladies have the biggest teats on our planet, on average being five times bigger than their heads. Their arses, however, aren’t nearly as big, smaller than those of Rhoynar and roughly on the level of Riverlanders in Westeros. Valyrian men, meanwhile, are just as long and girthy as Westerlanders, which is quite big not as much as cocks of Summer Islanders.

After the Doom, most Valyrians are now restricted to being rulers of Westeros (at least before Robert’s Rebellion) and Free Cities. Out of these colonies, three were founded by religious dissidents who hated freedom of faith (Lorath, Norvos, Qohor) and five were created to better rule remote regions (Pentos, Myr, Tyrosh, Lys and Volantis).

Volantis was founded first, and in it still remain descendants of those who lived in Valyria. As such, the ruling class, named “Old Blood”, still practices many habits like already mentioned polygamy and sexual contests for absolute power. Moreover, entrance to the eastern part of the city is only accessed by those with Valyrian-sized breasts and cocks, with guards carefully checking guests’ parameters.

In terms of religion Bearded Priests of Norvos are the most peculiar. In their dogma, only peasants can wear clothes, with merchants having bare chest in both sexes, and nobles being completely naked outside of winter (and even then, they wear less clothes than lowborn). According to them, being naked is a privilege of highborn, and so is ability to have family sex in public…

As for other cities, the biggest number of Valyrians is situated in the Free City of Lys, where not only ruling class, but even peasants have breasts the size of five heads. In Tyrosh, they dye their hair purple, in Myr they prefer arses thanks to Rhoynar cultural influence, in Pentos polygamy is banned like in Westeros, but everywhere citizens still fuck their own relatives like in the rest of the world.

While Valyrian ladies are well-known for their assets, there is another fact that is as undeniable as sun setting in the west or that fucking your relative is the only way to continue your bloodline – that is, Summer Islanders have biggest cocks.

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And although many can note the dick size in denizens of the islands south of Westeros, there are other unique habits Summer Islanders have.

Much of their history is hidden in the archives inaccessible to foreigners, so we only can start describing it when first slavers came to an archipelago. For a while, they raided the land and took them in as slaves, but fierce Princess Xhanda Qo and her uncle-husband managed to unite islands and defeat their foe, creating a nation that fell during the rule of their daughter.

Since then, all islands and even some smaller regions were fiercely independent from each other, and invaders as well. These princedoms are sparsely described, with the most well-known being Tall Trees Town, the city of scribes and singers, Lotus Port that produces the best ships of the world, and extremely rich Koj with its beautiful Pearl Palace.

Women of the islands have fairly small breasts comparable to those of crannogmen, but their arses more than make up for that. It is said that their cheeks are the second biggest after Rhoynars, and even then, many in Dorne concede their title to the Summer Isles. Most maesters believe it is a natural reaction of females to gigantic cocks of their male relatives, which are usually as long as an entire elbow.

In the religion of the islanders family marriage doesn’t exist at all. Everything and everyone can mate with whoever related they want, and in all these unions children are born legitimate, with no bastardy at all. Moreover, sex between two relatives is rarely described, with them instead preferring to have orgies of several families or with more than three partners active.

Even more interesting is that Summer Islanders have no wars like Westeros or Essos. Instead, political matters are usually decided in these same orgies between families of one party and another, somewhat similar to those practiced in Valyria and Volantis. It is no wonder many believe these islanders to be the lustiest and most obsessed with sex nation in the world.

While most nations only take women on board if they need transport, on Summer Islands, the best sea-faring nation of our planet, females can join the crew like males. Indeed, many female relatives join service of their uncles and fathers, slowly raising in ranks but always remaining their sex objects, something which can be seen in nearly every port they trade in.

With their great skills at sea, it is no wonder that they reached not only every port from Lannisport to Qarth, but even quite a lot of less studied lands as well. It is said that they have much bigger maps of southern Sothoryos hidden in Tall Trees, and one nation on a much more easternmost island even resembles them quite a bit.

That is, of course, Naath. Its inhabitants, so-called “Peaceful People”, look similar, but have smaller arses and cocks. They live in a much less cultured isolation, which is only broken by periodic slaver raids which happen only at night due to a weird disease that claims foreigners by day. They have retreated completely to caves and cliffs due to that, and aren’t know by maesters very well.

Less similar are those few who still remain on the pirate-filled Basilisk Isles, especially the Isle of Toads. These people have unpleasantly small breasts and dicks, but weirder is the presence of webs on their fingers. While some claim that they are remnants of a forgotten civilization, most now believe that are degenerated colonists from the Summer Isles.

With these peace-loving and lustful people out of our picture, it is time to return to Essos and look at the great conquerors of the plains, those who felled ancient civilization of Sarnor – Dothraki of the Great Grass Sea.

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While Dothraki are often believed to be half-wit savages, there is more to their culture than simple slaughter.

They hail from the eastern Great Grass Sea, their legend saying the first Khal, Temmo, rode from the waters of the Womb alongside his mother-wife Doshi, and impressed other Dothraki so easily they swore loyalty to him, making him their leader. From there hordes and hordes of Temmo’s men rode in all directions, raiding them in his name.

That happened soon after the Doom, when most lands experienced chaos of losing their dragonlord masters, and so their raids were very effective. From Essaria to Adakhileki men were slaughtered and weak were turned into slaves, but soon enough spoils became so big Dothraki started fighting among each other, which is how they still live.

Raiding, as known by many, is the center of their life, only second to horse-riding. Giant groups of men, their female relatives and servants named khalasars travel from one corner of the grassland to another, either burning and slaughtering their homes, or accepting great gifts. Either way, they find all the food they need that way, and all the joy of war as well.

Breast size of Dothraki isn’t very big, only twice the size of their heads, and arse is fairly similar in that regard. Their men, however, have cocks only second to the Summer Islanders, the reason for that still being unknown. They usually only wear smallest garments that cover nipples, cunts and dicks, and only put on clothes when visiting cities where such clothing isn’t allowed.

As soon as he claims the title, Khal marries his female relative, named Khaleesi in their language, and fucks her wherever possible with one notable exception – not indoors. Only under sky and horse god that roams it are they allowed to mate their mothers, sisters, daughters and cousins, a sacred act which is also often done in orgies between many families of khalasar.

Once Khal dies, his heir Khalakka ascends to the position, and takes previous Khaleesi, in most cases his mother, as wife. Only when his partner stop giving birth is she sent to join Dosh Khaleen, a council of hags that rule the only Dothraki city, Vaes Dothrak. The same happens if Khal has no heirs, and men who slowly take over his khalasar usually don’t care if his relative is still able to bear children…

Vaes Dothrak itself is a peculiar place. Outside of Dosh Khaleen’s palace, only trade squares are present it, as well as stolen monuments of family love in other nations. There, no Dothraki is allowed to shed blood, and any respectable relative-husband must visit it so that old crones can bless his union. That is the only time men are allowed inside the town, so that they wouldn’t stop raiding neighbors.

As for the nations Dothraki had successfully destroyed, not a single one is more famous than Tall People of Sarnor. Once the rulers of the banks of Sarne and distant “cousins” of the First Men, they are now reduced to a single city of Saath that survives on Lorathi and Ibbenese help. These remnants are indeed taller than other people, but their other body parts aren’t that remarkable.

Kingdom of Omber that borders their former lands, meanwhile, didn’t resist. Instead, they offered much of their gold and lowborn to Dothraki, and so they avoided that cruel fate. To this day many Khals that ride near Omber take what they want from them, and while some believe it to be an honorless humiliation, this nation still proudly survives in our world.

Many others can be listed, like sheepish Lhazarene, tree-dwelling Ifequevron, colonists of New Ibbish, Tenth Free City, but these two nations are enough of a proof of Dothraki ruthlessness. But not all slaves captured are solely used by them…

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When Valyrians were still in their infancy, another group of people controlled the region, those being Ghiscari.

They are one of the oldest civilizations in the world, only rivaled by Yi Ti, Sarnor and Qarth. In these early days of our planet, they created a great empire spanning from the southern Great Grass Sea to colonies on Sothorios, with their loyalty enforced by famed legions. Alas, it was not to last, with a competitor rising to the west…

When dragonlords emerged from Valyria, Ghiscari were the first to meet them on battlefield. Five wars ensued, each less and less successful for defenders, until finally invaders reached their capital and burned it, ending the empire and taking over remaining cities. With the Doom slaver settlements reestablished their independence, but never regained their former glory.

People of Slavers Bay are not only notable because of their craft, though. They also put their hair in weird braids unseen in other nations, eat any meat but man and dragon, live in pyramids and worship harpies, always drawing them with breasts bigger than six heads to spite Valyrians. Still, at this point they are more mongrels than true Ghiscari, even speaking corrupted language of dragonlords.

Breast size of their women isn’t big, only slightly bigger than the one of Dothraki, and arses aren’t huge either. Their men’s cocks are also not that long, comparable to ones present in the Stormlands. Legends of Old Ghis tell that these sizes are results of Valyrian magic, and that in the dawn of the world their teats and dicks were bigger, but most maesters believe it to be a falsehood.

Their family sex isn’t that interesting compared to some other cultures, with usual monogamic marriages and occasional other blood-related lovers, but the way they treat their slaves with it is. Most basic is Astapor, where men are gelded and turned into Unsullied, best warriors of the world according to many sources, while women become maids of their Good Masters.

Yunkai, however, trains its slaves in the way of pleasure, and that pleasure is family sex for all to see. No matter what kind – Summer Islander orgies, Rhoynar one with their preference of anal, Lyseni teat-fuck – Wise Masters love each and every position, and try to imitate what their slaves do with their own highborn relatives (usually with lesser result).

A combination of that can be seen in the greatest slaver city, Meereen. There in the fighting pits slaves fight each other for fun and glory… and fuck their relatives as well. Great Masters are also much more capable than their counterparts in Astapor and Yunkai, and can usually satisfy their female relatives more easily, something which propelled them to the heights of slaver hierarchy.

Another, more distant remnant is an island city of New Ghis, located to the south of Slavers Bay. In it, legions of Old Ghis still exist and recruit all freeborn citizens once three years, and slavery overall isn’t as pronounced. This leads to nobles of this island having less variety in their family sex poses, but also much more love than in masters of the mainland.

There are also other cities near Slavers Bay, Valyrian in origin but now being closer to Ghiscari. Those are Elyria on its little island, Tolos which is famed for its slingers… and grim Mantarys. People who live here were affected by the Doom, and are now famed for their two set of balls and three teats, which only makes reputation of that town even more ominous.

Those are people of the Slavers Bay, proud masters that control the heart of their trade. Now, with western Essos almost finished, we move onto the last great civilization that separates it from the Far East – Qartheen.

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In-between Yi Ti and former Ghis, a peculiar city had been standing for thousands of years, and that town’s name is Qarth.

It is a last remnant of a once-great civilization, Qaathi, which once ruled much of Red Wastes. Many inside the city even believe it to be the first one in existence, but most maesters and even other Essosi doubt that. Alas, nearly every town built by so-called “Milk Men” was destroyed by Dothraki, with one exception. Qarth with its three walls stood, and became last refuge for fleeing Qaathi.

With mainland ambitions forever sealed, the city instead turned to the sea. Three additional fortresses were founded on the shore, and soon enough Qarth rebuilt itself by controlling the safest route between the West and East. Sure, any captain could circle an island of Great Moraq, but its stormy waters were way too dangerous, and so most resorted to just paying their way into Yi Ti and Leng.

Qartheen women are known mainly for their unnaturally pale skin, with their teats and arses somewhere in the middle on the overall scale, comparable to Valemen of Westeros (which is still fairly big by Essosi standards, especially after the Doom and exile of most Rhoynar). Men, meanwhile, don’t have very long cocks, with them being barely bigger than Stormlanders.

Women always wear gowns than only cover their cunts, not breasts, a possible influence of Faros. As such, when families travel together in palanquins, only sex involving the upper part of the body happens, with the rest of relative fun only being seen inside their houses and palaces. Moreover, it is customary for many Qartheen to lick nipples of their female kin, which is seen as the highest form of love.

Their family marriage is monogamous, with both related partners still treated largely independent in their work and duties, but there is an exception. At the very beginning of their union, both relatives can request something they really want, which their groom or bride has to give at any cost. Only then is their marriage truly consummated, not during any family sex they would have in the meantime.

Nominally Qarth is ruled by Pureborn, an old and rigid council of nobles who were descendants of ancient kings and queens, but many merchant companies now fight for control. The most peculiar of institutions are assassin guild of Sorrowful Men that cry before killing, and Undying Ones, mages that use a mysterious drink to see the future…

While most maesters don’t believe this, some say that it is these wizards who choose the appropriate relative for their client to marry, by looking into future and interpreting signs of which mother, father, sibling or cousin would lead to the prosperous and lustful fucking, and which won’t. While it may’ve been true in the past, decline of magic suggests even superstitious don’t make such visits anymore.

Those sailors that don’t have the money usually cross stormy Cinnamon Straits, which also house a few trade cities. Most notable is Faros of Great Moraq, whose women have second-biggest teats in Essos after Valyrians, and where men worship huge bosoms (represented by the Stone Cow) by impregnating their relatives and drinking their milk. Mother-son pairs are also considered best form of marriage there.

To the south is a small island of Vahar where town of the same name stands, but it doesn’t have much interesting habits of family sex or notably well-endowed inhabitants. Then, on the very tip of the biggest island in the world Port Moraq is located, built by Farosi many centuries ago. Finally, the last port before Jade Sea is Zabhad, where its leader shan lives in a beautiful palace made of ivory.

Qarth and small cities scattered on the surrounding islands were the last major civilization of Western Essos, with all others being on the other side of Great Bone Mountains. And one of them is nearly-destroyed Patrimony of Hyrkoon.

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Even though Patrimony of Hyrkoon is younger than Yi Ti or Ghis, it’s still one of the most important realms of men in legends.

It is named after Hyrkoon the Hero, which is often believed to be another version of Azor Ahai’s name, and as such often described as his birthplace. Regardless if true or not, in the ancient era it was a big realm on the shores of Great Inner Sea with dozens of cities under a shared rule of Patriarchs who claimed descent from a mythical hero.

Nowadays, however, Inner Sea had completely dried out, and only three fortresses near wells remain. Its Patriarchs are dying out, and the defenses are being slowly destroyed by neighboring nomads named Jogos Nhai. Still, proud heirs of Hyrkoon endure these challenges, getting all the needed food and ofttimes water by trade, and continuing their martial traditions to protect their homeland.

Women in Patrimony have breasts only somewhat smaller than those of Qarth, and they usually show them at any opportunity like in the previously mentioned city. Arses are standard for Essosi, while cocks, which in normal circumstances are normal for denizens of that continent, are directly linked to one of the strangest habits of all cultures.

Once males come of age in these three cities, they mate every single female relative possible, from mother to cousins. If every maid or most of them are satisfied, these men are allowed to retain their cocks and become rulers, the ones which produce next generations of Hyrkooni. If not, they are castrated and start doing lesser work, from farming to counseling, with no distraction from families.

Females are trained into being warriors, because of a Hyrkooni belief that only those who give life can take it away. As such, most of the year they fight neighboring raiders and only return home on holy days, to mate their most skilled relatives. Once a woman is pregnant, she is allowed to leave the army for a while, at least until their child would come of age.

As it was said already, the main enemy of three fortresses are warriors of Jogos Nhai, nomadic nation whose people ride half-striped horses and can’t ever shed blood of their own. They are ruled by jhats in war and moon singers in peace, with men usually being former and women – latter. Occasionally, jhattar rises to unite other jhats, but not many are known for the last thousand years.

Their breasts and arses are similar to those of western Dothraki, but details of their life differ. Usually, jhat and moon singer of one clan are relative-husband and relative-wife, but in some cases, if roles are reversed, they put on clothes of a different gender. As such, these clans are noted for having bare-breasted females riding to war while their male family member puts on elaborate clothing.

Jogos Nhai raided quite a lot of their neighbors. They completely destroyed a nation of mountain giants in the north, they reduced close Kingdom of N’gai into a singular hidden city, and they terrorized northern Yi Ti and Hyrkooni for many years… That is, when they’re not captured by warrior-maids and sacrificed to the gods.

Of note is Asabad, a port city that is first to be found after emerging from Qarth. It was founded by Hyrkooni during their golden age and helped them trade by sea, but with the decline YiTish to the east conquered it, adding it to their already large realm. Occasional fighting still happens to regain the city, but with no success.

These weird people of three remnant fortress deep in the desert is the first thing to be found while travelling by foot or on camels, but once you pass them, you enter rich and majestic realm named Yi Ti – the oldest civilization on the planet.

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While Valyria rose and fell in the west, in the east a great empire still holds, and its name is Yi Ti.

This country is supposedly a successor to a much older, mythical realm named Great Empire of Dawn, which fell during the Long Night and the Great Betrayal, the one discussed before in this work. Since then, Yi Ti had its fair share of expansions and losses, but never truly died, continuing to uphold beacon of civilization amidst many nomadic tribes surrounding it.

This, alongside the age of the realm, greatly feeds into their feelings of superiority. All other people are non-family fucking savages to them, only good for trade, and so YiTish rarely ever bother to show intricacies of their culture. As such, not many things are known about their habits and traditions, with the exceptions being listed here.

Women of Yi Ti aren’t particularly gifted, having breasts and arse only around the size of their heads, and the same can be said about the length of their men’s cocks. Still, they compensate these misfortunes by developing more than a thousand positions of family sex, those that are so convoluted they have to be studied since maturity.

Remembering these poses is vital, since family love of YiTish is extremely rigid. Both relatives have a strict routine they follow, with each day being the one to potentially conceive some offspring. Deviations are seen as dishonorable and can be punished by a fine or worse. Due to that, mother-son and father-daughter pairings are seen ideal, since an older partner means less mistakes in bed.

While Yi Ti is often believed to be a centralized country, that is incorrect. For many centuries rule of God-emperors doesn’t extend outside of their capitals, with the rest being ruled by nobles and tax collectors of different kinds. That is true for Bu Gai and his mother-wife as well, who only control Yin… when they’re not fucking each other, that is, and they do that most of their time.

Due to Azure emperor’s disinterest and incompetency in ruling, others started to challenge his title as well. An Imperial general named Pol Qo, who spent much of his life hunting Jogos Nhai, rebelled and proclaimed himself and his martial sister-wife first rulers of the Orange Dynasty, and set up his capital in a recently founded Traders Town, where he plans conquest of his homeland…

But the most unusual pretender sits in a remote city named Carcosa, hidden in the Mountains of Morn. His name is unknown, with most calling him “sorcerer lord”, and he claims to be 69th Yellow emperor of the house long gone. It is said that his daughter-wife is the one giving him more powers through sex, but at such a large distance, it can’t be verified.

More important than these three squabbling is a collection of large defense buildings named Five Forts. It is believed they were built to protect humanity from otherworldly threats by the Pearl Emperor thousands of years ago, but now all they do is keep shrikes of Grey Waste at bay – a violent tribe of men who seemingly mate their relatives on reptile hides.

But there are threats inside the empire as well. The biggest one is a weird cult named Church of Starry Wisdom, supposedly founded by Bloodstone Emperor himself. It venerates rocks fallen from the sky and propagates teat and arse-altering forms of magic, all to bring more nightmares to the world. While nearly everyone in Yi Ti hunts them down, they are never truly gone…

Another one foe is even more mysterious. Tigermen, those servants of the dark, were not seen since fall of the Dawn, but rumors go that they’re still lurking in southern jungles of Yi Ti, and a few of them were even involved in a fall of Si Qo, one of its cities… Still, most maesters believe these tales to be entirely fictional. That, however, can’t be said about an island nation of Leng.

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To the south of Yi Ti, a mysterious island lies in the Jade Sea, and its name is Leng.

For many millennia it was isolated from the outside world, which naturally led to many assuming it was filled with demons. Some YiTish traders tried to do their job in the northern ports, but on four occasions it led to bloodshed instigated by Empresses of Leng, who were supposedly influenced by Old Ones creeping in their ruins.

That changed when Yi Ti conquered the island. It was forced into politics of Essos, to the dismay of Lengii who bravely resisted invaders. Four hundred years ago they finally regained their freedom, but nothing was the same as before. Two thirds of Leng were settled by YiTish, and now Empresses had to participate in the happenings of other realms… just to protect what was left of their land.

Women and men of Leng aren’t very big in terms of their breasts, arses and cocks (much like most of Essos), but they are very tall, only second to Sarnori. They are very secretive and still do not trust the outsiders, even after many years of occupation, and so much of information about their family sex comes from accounts written by YiTish.

Ever since Leng liberated itself, its Empress has a very peculiar form of family marriage. She always takes two relative-husbands, with one dressing and mating like a true denizen of the island, and another wearing clothes of Yi Ti and memorizing all the unusual and numerous poses. They always fuck in threesomes, with “YiTish” relative taking the arse-hole and “Lengii” – the cunt.

This is used to show equality of people living on Leng, and Empress’s preference for her own kind as well. After all, with northern invaders still controlling two thirds of the island through cities of Leng Yi and Leng Ma, Lengii were reduced to a southern part and the city of Turrani, so this kind of appeasement is necessary.

Comparatively to YiTish of the north, these remnant islanders have an even weirder family sex. Every two years or so they travel to the very center of the island and descend into ruins of long-gone civilization, and seemingly perform a ritual that gives them children. But for what reason? Anyway, most maesters don’t believe these stories and just consider these ruins to be particularly attractive to Lengii.

There are other islands in the Jade Sea, however. The smallest one is the Isle of Whips, a small rock where pirates and slavers hid their most prized possessions. An archipelago named Manticore Isles houses most of these creatures in the world, while paradisiacal Marahai is often sought by travelers as a great place to mate their relative after months on the tight ship.

Much of that was first described by the greatest captain of all Westerosi, Corlys Velaryon. He and his female cousin travelled beyond Qarth and spent a long of time in the East, and when they returned, not only did his House became richer than ever before or after, but he learned half a thousand new positions that helped him take other relatives as his lovers.

Many legends also exist about Jade Sea. In one, somewhere on its shore is a great city of poets, where both male and female relatives make love to each other, and every moan of theirs is a beautiful song that can make even the strongest knight tear up. Some people near it are even said to drink wine from the skulls of their enemies…

But that is just a fancy myth. Reality is something not many would know at such a distance, but there are better-verified stories as well. One tells of a dark city on the tip of a peninsula known solely as Shadow Lands, and its name can creep out any man of nation, even Ironborn or Dothraki… and its name is Asshai-by-the-Shadow.

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No city has a worse reputation in the world than Asshai, a famed town of many mages.

Its history is highly mystical and unknown, with many believing it already stood when the First Men were still living in Essos and the Great Empire of Dawn controlled much of the East. For much of its existence it stood in isolation, only briefly paying tribute to Yi Ti, outliving many catastrophes like the defeat of Old Ghis or the Doom.

While Asshai is bigger than all of Westerosi cities combined, only covens of bloodmages, pyromancers, alchemists and many others live there, making its population no bigger than a small fisherman town. Much of its buildings is built with black stone that sucks light out of it, putting the city into an eternal night even in the middle of the day.

Although most inhabitants are representatives of other nations, a few native Asshaii (mostly shadowbinders) also exist. Their women have fairly average-sized teats and arses, and the same can be said about cock length in men. They only wear lacquered wood masks, with other parts of the body fully naked and ready for family sex.

While many aspects of it are unknown, Maester Marwyn who researched them tells quite a lot about shadowbinding itself. In it, a male relative couples with a female one, both reciting complex and ancient spells, and once he releases inside, she instantly becomes pregnant and soon enough births an obedient shadow, ready to do whatever asked.

Other types of magic are also present in Asshai, no matter how depraved. There, necromancers resurrect their dead relatives to mate them and birth their children, aeromancing women generate air in their lungs to suck relatives’ dicks for days without stop, while spellsinger men make their female kin moan in lust to make their manhoods even longer…

Asshai is unusual in other qualities as well. Children can’t be born in a normal way there, and so some sort of magic is involved in every conception between relatives. Every animal not native to the city dies horribly, and so there are no horses or elephants to move people around, while most of the food has to be imported from nearby Leng and Yi Ti.

The city itself is surrounded by a gigantic range of mountains, named simply Mountains of Mourn. There are barely any ways to traverse it, with only one exception – the shores of Ash River, at which mouth Asshai stands for millennia. Only shadowbinders go that way, however, and even they never visit the only ruin in that place named Stygai, fearing its dark magic.

In the middle of the mountains, however, a valley houses Hidden Sea and two cities located on its shore. One, Carcosa, was already discussed when talking about Yellow Emperors, but another one is even weirder. Its name is not known at such distance, but winged men live here, who travel and mate their relatives on wings, either real one or artificial.

To the south of Asshai are Saffron Straits, those that lead from the Jade Sea into the unknown. They separate Essos and Ulthos, a forested and uninhabited land barely known by adventurers. In the straits themselves lies an island of Ulos, where weird ruins are located. Ruins of some ancient civilization? We may never know.

While Asshai is the last remotely interesting nation in the world, there are others, those that do not warrant an entire chapter to themselves. Ibben, Thousand Islands, Brindled Men of Sothoryos, Lhazar, Lyber, Mossovy, Bloodless Men… All these will nicely round up our exploration of family love all over the world.

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There are four corners of this world, and each is barely known by us Westerosi.

To the north of Essos only a few islands lie, with the most notable once being Ib and Thousand Islands. The former is a home to shaggy men and women, whose main attributes are bigger than in other denizens of the continent with few exceptions (breasts are only smaller than Valyrian and Qartheen, arses – Rhoynar and Summer Islander, cocks – dragonlord’s and swan ship captain’s).

Ibbenese mostly trade whale oil and amber with their neighbors, and managed to create colonial empire in the northern Essos to gather other resources. In the ancient past they had kings, but now Shadow Council rules the island, which is comprised of nobles, priests and merchants. Their family sex isn’t researched well by the Citadel, with many believing to be similar to the one wildlings have.

Thousand Islands are much scarier, however. They are bare rocks in the sea where a peculiar tribe of men lives, those that fear the waters and hate all strangers, no matter the nation. Their women reportedly don’t suck dicks of their relatives due to sharpening their teeth, while men abhor mating arse-holes of their kin. Sizes are seemingly close to those of other Essosi, especially Jogos Nhai.

To the north of these ancient remains ice grows stronger and stronger, until it finally envelops all of the sea. There, in a place called Cannibals Bay, remnants of shipwreck survivors eat anything they can, including other humans, giants and worse things from the north of Westeros roam the ice while peculiar cold-breathing dragons fly around… But that’s just a tale, however.

Meanwhile in the steppes of Dothraki, other locations can be found as well. One of the famed ones is a lost city of Lyber, where followers of the spider goddess and serpent god clash for eternity, only stopping the struggle to mate their relatives, but its existence is dubious. Much, however, can be said about Lhazar, a small nation between Ghiscari and Dothraki.

These are timid, sheepish people who have the same looks and sizes as their nomadic neighbors, but behave very differently. They preach to the Great Shepherd, a god who forbids violence and blesses them to just herd sheep… Alas, khals that pass nearby never lose their chance to raid these innocent men, who never even put a fight against them.

To the south of Essos, however, lies a grim continent named Sothoryos. It only houses a tribe of hog-like humans named Brindled Men, whose women and men are almost as large in their sex organs as Valyrians, Rhoynars or Summer Islanders. Only a few that live on the shores are civilized, however, with the rest being barely more than regular monsters, a common sight in these jungles.

Quite a few tales exist about other denizens of Sothoryos, like lizard men suspiciously similar to shrykes, or eyeless cave-dwellers that mate their relatives solely with smell, touch and hear. Other than that, it is an infinite green hell, the one that even dragonlords couldn’t find an end to. So, mayhaps there are some other nations of men present in the deep south…

In the Far East, meanwhile, the edge of the world is often believed to be Mossovy. It is a dark, cold forest inhabited only by shapeshifters and demon hunters, who were only seen by Corlys Velaryon of all Westerosi. To the south is the Grey Waste with shrykes and an ancient city of K’Dath that even they fear, and then, just to the north of the Shadow Lands, lay the Cities of Bloodless Men.

Are these “bloodless” people just pale-skinned, mayhaps like Qartheen? Are they corpses brought back to life by mad mages? We will never know for certain, probably for good. After all, of all the lands present on three continents, none is better than our Seven Kingdoms, be it monogamous family-loving Andal, cold or savage First Man, or lustful Rhoynar.

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All done. Perestan sighed and looked out of his window. It was already dark, yet Oldtown still moaned in unison, with everyone from lowborn mothers to noble daughters receiving waves of pleasure from their relatives. It felt so weird, but it was right to Archmaester’s mind. After all, who’s better to mate than your own family?

He then thought about naming his book. It was hard to choose, with “Fire and Blood” and “A World of Ice and Fire” already occupied. So, instead he decided to wrap up his writings by honoring two rulers of King’s Landing.

After considering several versions, he finally wrote:

“To King Arlan of House Baratheon, brother-son of King Joffrey and his mother-wife Queen Cersei

And King Mace of House Tyrell, son of Lord Luthor and his wife Lady Olenna.”

Then, Perestan closed it. Next history course would be interesting, and would finally inspire even less invested scholars, but the book itself… A great gift to two royal families, and mayhaps even some other nobles of the realm. With these thoughts, Archmaester went to bed, and all his dreams were about Targaryens of the past.