Archive of Our Own

September 2026

Ilya leaned back in his chair at the Hollanders’ dining table, one ankle hooked lazily over the other, phone in hand, amusement written all over his face. Saturday dinner had been excellent- some kind of glazed salmon David had perfected that even he, a notorious parma chicken lover, could admit was better than anything he’d eaten recently- and now the plates were cleared and the wine was open. Perfect time for entertainment.

“Listen to this,” he announced, voice already dripping with delight. He cleared his throat theatrically. “It’s not just some dumb internet fluff. This is from National Geographic online. They did a whole feature. Unlikely Sanctuary: How an Injured Crow Found Family with Toronto’s Capybaras.”

Shane, sitting beside him, groaned. “Ilya. Not this again.”

“Shush, Hollander. Your mother wants to hear.” Ilya winked at Yuna across the table. She was already smiling, chin in her hand, the way she did when she knew her son-in-law was about to be a menace. David just shook his head fondly and poured more wine. Ilya scrolled down, reading aloud in his best dramatic narrator voice, the one he usually saved for mocking post-game interviews. “In the heart of Toronto’s bustling zoo, a quiet miracle has unfolded among the world’s largest rodents. This spring, a capybara pup- born to a troop of six adults in the spacious South American exhibit- began drawing an unusual crowd. Every morning, a small flock of American crows would descend on the enclosure’s perimeter fence, perching in watchful silence. Zoo staff initially dismissed it as coincidence; crows are opportunistic and the capybaras’ daily vegetable scatter often left scraps. But the visits persisted. Visitors noticed. Videos circulated. Then, one overcast Tuesday, the pattern changed. A young crow- barely fledged, its glossy black feathers still carrying the soft sheen of a juvenile- arrived alone. It landed awkwardly, one wing dragging. Staff intervened swiftly. Dr. Ahnah Qitupana, the zoo’s senior avian veterinarian, was the first to examine the bird.” Ilya paused, eyes lighting up. “Oh, here’s the good part. They interviewed her.” He dropped his voice into a warm, slightly French-Canadian tone for the quote. “When we brought him in, Dr. Qitupana told National Geographic, he was in rough shape. Spinal trauma- likely from a window strike or a predator encounter. The kind of injury that severs just enough neural pathways to ground a bird for life. He’ll never migrate, never hunt like his wild siblings. But his mind is sharp. Crows are ridiculously intelligent; this one watched every move we made during treatment. After couple of days he started to recognize his keepers. We stabilized him, managed the pain, and fitted a custom brace. The goal was always the same: give him the best possible life. Even if that life meant he’d fly like… well, like a very determined, slightly overweight domestic hen.”

Yuna laughed outright. David covered his mouth with his napkin. Ilya grinned and kept reading. “After weeks in the zoo’s wildlife hospital, the crow- now nicknamed the Visitor by staff- showed an immediate and inexplicable pull back toward the capybara exhibit. When reintroduced, the youngest pup, a round, golden-furred three-month-old with the calm demeanor typical of its species, toddled straight over. The crow lowered its head. The capybara nuzzled it. Within hours they were inseparable. The pair has since become the zoo’s most endearing exhibit. The crow perches on the capybara’s broad back for sunbaths, rides along during the troop’s leisurely wades in the shallow pool, and even shares pre-chewed romaine leaves beak-to-muzzle. The capybara, in turn, grooms the crow’s feathers with gentle nibbles and stands guard while the bird naps tucked against its side. Zoo biologists note that capybaras’ famously tolerant social structure- often described as the friendliest rodent on Earth- seems to extend even to injured corvids. Crows, for their part, are known for lifelong bonds and complex emotional lives. This unlikely duo appears to have formed exactly that. The internet, of course, lost its collective mind. When the zoo opened an online naming poll, fans drew an irresistible parallel to two beloved Canadian hockey figures. The capybara is Harris Drover, one commenter wrote. Everybody loves him. He’s calm, he makes friends with literally anyone. The crow? Troy Barrett- looks grumpy as hell, but would absolutely fight a hawk for his cute boyfriend. The vote was unanimous. Last weekend, the real Troy Barrett and Harris Drover attended the official naming ceremony. The former Toronto player and the Ottawa Centaurs’ communications manager posed for photos while the actual crow- now officially Troy- rode the capybara- now officially Harris- across the exhibit. Barrett, trying and failing to maintain his trademark stoic expression, accepted a plush mascot version of the crow. Drover, beaming, took the capybara. Both men later announced a ten-thousand-dollar donation to the zoo’s Wild Wings Rehabilitation Fund, which supports injured native birds like young Troy. Dr. Qitupana, watching the ceremony from the sidelines, smiled. Some animals just find their people, she said. Doesn’t matter the species. Love finds a way.” Ilya lowered the phone and spread his arms wide. “My friends are literally a National Geographic feature now. A crow and a giant guinea pig. This is their legacy.”

Shane pinched the bridge of his nose, but he was smiling. “You’re just jealous. Let them have their moment.”

“Moment?” Ilya scoffed, but it was soft with fondness leaking out the edges. “They get a whole Disney fairy tale. Private vet interviews. Plush mascots. I’m just saying. Harris is the capybara- everyone wants to pet him. Troy is the crow- looks like he’ll peck your eyes out but actually just wants to be carried around on someone’s back. It’s poetry.” He took a sip of wine, then added, quieter, almost to himself, “Must be nice. Having the whole world root for your weird little love story. I bet Pixar will turn it into some epic animation. Not to mention the Hollander sea lion story from earlier this year!” Ilya’s voice started to sound quite pathetic.

The table went still for half a second. Shane’s hand found Ilya’s thigh under the table and squeezed once- gentle, grounding. Yuna leaned forward. “Well, you had your own chaos. Remember the press conference where you announced you would be featured as Ken doll and the toy went out of stock within minutes?” Yuna found it pretty endearing that Ilya was slightly butt-hurt over not having any adventures with cute exotic animals.

David nodded sagely. “Or the time the league tried to fine you for wearing Hollander 81 jersey for the pride game last year and the fans started a petition.” Ilya literally attracted trouble. David couldn't understand why they tried to console him for his imagined lack of adventures.

Ilya waved a hand, but his ears were warm. “Yes, yes, I was very dramatic and sexy about it. Still. No one named a rodent or sea creature after me.”

Shane’s grin turned evil. “Speaking of rodents and birds…” He reached into Ilya’s pocket and pulled out his Mercedes car key attached to a keychain- two tiny plush figures dangling from it- a round, serene capybara and a slightly scruffy black crow with a crooked wing. “Look what Ilya found in the Toronto Zoo gift shop after our last game there. Someone had to buy the limited-edition set. And by someone I mean the Russian menace who spent twenty minutes in the gift shop not being able to decide which souvenirs to buy... He bought them all.”

Ilya snatched the keychain and clutched it to his chest like it was treasure. “They are excellent quality. Very soft. Harris- capybara has the little smile and apple on his back. Troy-crow has the murder blue eyes. So accurate. Plushies, stickers, books and other stuff is for Pike’s children.” He added defensively.

David laughed so hard he had to set his wine down. “You boys went to the zoo just to see them, didn’t you?”

“Obviously,” Ilya said. “We told the zookeeper we were there for ‘research.’ He gave us a private viewing. Troy- the bird- rode Harris- the rodent- right past us. I almost cried. It was disgusting.” Ilya couldn’t stop laughing thinking of that right in front of my salad meme. He teased Troy about it for over a week.

David’s eyes sparkled. “Shane, remember that show you used to watch? The one about odd animal couples? The otter and the cat, the deer and the goose…”

Shane lit up. “Unlikely Animal Friends! I loved that show.” Shane ducked his head, sheepish. “I… still watch it. There’s a new episode next week about the Toronto pair. I set a reminder.”

Ilya stared at him, betrayed and delighted. “You watch animal friendship documentaries? My husband, the mister serious, watches interspecies cuddling content? When? How?”

“Shut up,” Shane muttered, but he was laughing. “It’s wholesome. I watch it on my phone sometimes.”

“You know what,” Yuna said warmly, reaching across to pat Shane’s hand, then Ilya’s. “You two fit right in with the odd couples. Always have.”

Ilya looked down at the little plush keychain in his palm- crow cozy right next to capybara- and felt something soft and ridiculous bloom in his chest. He was never going to admit it out loud, but the whole thing was… nice. His friends were happy. The world was cheering for them. And here he was, at this table, with the man he’d once pretended to hate, and the parents who’d welcomed him like he’d always belonged. He put the keychain back to his pocket and turned to Shane. “I’ll be over here being jealous of Troy and Harris’s extremely public, extremely soft PR moment and you will bring me ice cream with double wipped cream and a cookie to keep me happy.”

Shane leaned in and kissed his temple. “You’ll always be my dramatic Russian bear.”

“Better than being the guinea pig,” Ilya muttered.

“Capybara,” all three Hollanders corrected at once. Ilya threw his head back and laughed, loud and bright, the sound filling the warm kitchen like it always did on these Saturday nights.

The article went viral. The whole internet lost its mind over baby capybaras and crows in love. But this- right here, with these people- was the real fairy tale. And he wasn’t even a little bit jealous. Well. Maybe a tiny bit. But mostly he was just going to order two more plush sets tomorrow.. and maybe that one coloring book.