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The mating rituals of the crabby hermit. by pekeleke
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
01 Aug 2012
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Summary
After two years of fruitless attempts to become closer with Severus Snape, Harry finally realises that he has been going about it in the wrong way...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,366
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 168
- Kudos:
- 1,793
- Bookmarks:
- 440
- Hits:
- 22,171
Bookmarked by cherryflavoredcrisis
10 Dec 2025
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Summary
If anyone asked the Batfamily which Robin had the funniest ’joining the family’ story? Well, everyone would start with, “Well it seemed like Jason had the spot taken for good after having the audacity to try and jack the Batmobile’s tires and hit Bruce with his tire iron.” And then they’d say, “But then tiny Tim decided to try and steal the whole thing.”
Or: When Tim is 11 he figures it’s not hurting anyone if he. Ya know. Takes a picture in the Batmobile. But then the power goes to his head and all of a sudden he’s hacking the Batmobile and tearing through Gotham on a rescue mission.
Series
- Part 1 of Enter Road-Runner
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,115
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 851
- Kudos:
- 16,902
- Bookmarks:
- 4,290
- Hits:
- 113,220
Bookmarked by cherryflavoredcrisis
29 Sep 2025
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Summary
One would think traveling 52 years into the past would allow Harry some much desired anonymity, but unfortunately the malfunctioning Triwizard Cup spat Harry out on the quidditch pitch in the middle of a game. There's no lying about his provenance while a shiny plaque on the base of the Cup announces to everyone he is 'Harry Potter, Hogwarts Champion, 1994.'
Swept up by the ministry and sworn to secrecy by the Unspeakables, Harry is left to navigate the past on his own. Good thing his great-grandparents are willing to take him in - even if they're a little more into blood purity than Harry had expected - and Hogwarts is willing to welcome him back - even if he's a novelty to everyone as the time traveling Champion.
At least Harry will have the familiarity of Gryffindor Tower to ease his homesickness. Or he would, if the sorting hat hadn't put him in Slytherin, where he's forced to share a dorm with none other than Tom Riddle.
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In which Harry is determined to prevent Voldemort's rise, even if he has to stalk, bribe, threaten, and marry Tom Riddle to do it.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 90,346
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Comments:
- 1,371
- Kudos:
- 13,079
- Bookmarks:
- 4,085
- Hits:
- 257,142
Bookmarked by cherryflavoredcrisis
14 Aug 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
Amazing. 10000/10, watching all the manipulation (both intentional and unintentional) at work was incredible!

