Chapter Text
Somehow, whenever a new batch of knights got together to try and think of ways to get into the prince’s inner circle, Gwaine always knew about it. How? No one knew. But one thing Percival knew was that Gwaine felt it was his solemn duty to warn the naive men of the folly of some of their ideas. That is, Gwaine thought the solemn duty fell upon himself, Lancelot, Leon, Percival, and Elyan for being the “inner, inner circle.”
As there was a fresh batch of knights meeting to discuss, Gwaine dragged his fellow brothers down to the tavern.
“Listen up you young hopefuls. The first rule of the inner circle is we do not talk about the inner circle,” began Gwaine with a shifty look.
With a roll of his eyes, Percival picked up his cue. “The second is to heed our warnings and the tales you'll hear tonight.”
“The third is to try your best or not at all,” continued Leon, with the very air of a leader.
“Fourth and last. Do not be bitter if you don't make it. It does not mean you are a lesser knight,” said Lancelot with conviction.
“Unless, of course, you are,” muttered Gwaine before being elbowed by Elyan to shut up.
“It would also be wise to remember that this has nothing to do with whether you're of noble birth or not,” added Elyan, looking at those arrogant, noble men who thought it would be a shoo-in for them.
“For those not blessed with enough wits to realize it yet, it’s all about what Merlin thinks of you if you really want in. There are only two things you need to remember,” said Percival.
“With that, hold on to your ales, gentleman, and listen carefully. First up, I'll explain to you, Sirs Montague and Bertrand, exactly why kissing up to Merlin will definitely not work,” said Gwaine before downing half his drink. “In fact, it will do more harm than good.”
“Now, you all, maybe not all, but most of you at least, know that sucking up to prince Arthur will do no good. Impressed though he may be, it's what he expects out of his knights,” started Leon.
“Aye, I can give testimony to that,” chuckled Owain in good spirits.
“Now here's where we begin the tale of Sir Edric,” started Gwaine.
“Who's that?” asked a young knight in the back.
“Exactly. Now shut up and listen,” said Gwaine.
Before he could start up again, Elyan began the story.
“Sir Edric started off the same as many, the Prince route, and began training harder,” said Elyan, looking around at his audience. “When that didn't work, he thought about what else he could do. He thought, ‘of course! Merlin has the prince’s ear!’ So, he began to pay the manservant more attention.”
“Now, you lot have to be right idiots if you haven’t realized how protective of Merlin our princess is,” said Gwaine with a smirk.
“Naturally, prince Arthur noticed that Merlin was receiving more attention than normal from Sir Edric, so he started to get suspicious instead of impressed at the knight’s new prowess,” said Leon.
“Sir Edric didn’t even do anything untoward. He did small things like giving extra compliments and giving Merlin some extra sweetmeats from the market stalls,” added Elyan.
“The small acts alone annoyed the prince to no end, but the day that he found out that Sir Edric wanted to secure a private meeting with Merlin, he didn’t just sit idly by,” said Lancelot, shaking his head.
“You see, as soon as Arthur heard the news, he went to hunt down his manservant. How unfortunate for Sir Edric that Arthur caught him speaking to a cornered Merlin in a shady looking alcove,” said Percival with his eyebrows raised.
“Arthur saw red and attacked. Not listening to reason, he ended up sending the poor knight off to Camelot’s Freezing Northern Borders, to stand watch for the rest of his career,” said a grave Elyan.
“That was a memorable day. Merlin, bless him, shouting his little head off about how his virtue was never in danger,” said Gwaine with mirth.
“So any attentions towards Merlin, whether it be small niceties or bribes, don’t even try. You may think you can do it in secret, but trust us, the Prince will always know. If you don’t believe us, you can write to Sir Edric in the North,” said Leon.
“Or Sir Laurel,” added Percival.
“Or Sir Ebor,” said Elyan.
“Or Sirs Isaac, Darien, and Brennis,” said Gwaine.
“All of which are posted in the North,” said Lancelot, solemnly.
“Didn’t the Lady Morgana lie about Sir Ebor hitting on Merlin to get rid of him last Samhain?” asked Galahad.
“I knew it!” shouted Lucan, slamming his tankard on the table.
Leon smirked and scanned the scattered faces of the knights. Some were understanding, some were shocked, and some were in deep thought. Things were progressing as normal then.
“Second,” started Gwaine, all traces of mirth gone, “never, ever, EVER think to use force on Merlin."
“And you best listen,” said Bohrs, standing up for the full intimidation effect.
“Merlin is not only watched over by us,” said Lancelot, using his hand to motion to the other knights already in the circle, “he’s watched over by the entire castle.”
“Aye, the castle has eyes,” said Gwaine with a cryptic smile.
“That brings us to the story of Valiant. A knight I have no qualms of dropping the ‘sir’ for,” said Leon.
“Merlin is really the only one who drops the sir as a friendly thing,” chuckled Elyan.
“Hang on, Valiant? As in Vengeful Valiant, the sorcerer knight?” asked a knight further in the back.
“The very one. Except he was not a vengeful sorcerer. Just a slimy git, prouder than Uther himself,” said Gwaine.
“Well, go on then! We want to hear this tale,” shouted Sir Gareth, one of the younger knights.
“Agreed. This is a story I’d like to finally hear about,” said Sir Lucan.
“Of all the knight hopefuls that I’ve wanted to crash and burn so brightly, it was a shame that Valiant was already a knight to begin with,” said Kay, ruefully.
“Valiant was your average, rough and tough, brute knight. He came sauntering into Camelot one day for some tourney or other, saying he was the best the Western Isles had to offer,” began Percival.
“Too bad it was a tourney that didn’t allow the prince to take part in. He would have been long gone then,” said Elyan, shaking his head.
“As it was, Valiant won the tourney. It was unfortunate that one of ours suffered a fatal wound and passed. Sir Ewan, may he rest in peace,” said Lancelot
“May he rest in peace,” chorused the knights.
“He fought dirty, but Uther let’s say appreciated Valiant’s ruthless, merciless ways,” said Leon, with barely concealed disapproval.
“At the tourney feast, Uther asked Valiant if he wanted to extend his stay. The twat then went on about how being a knight was boring where he came from, so he might as well pledge himself to Camelot. That right there rubbed our princess the wrong way. I mean, Arthur’s all about being noble, so a man coming in saying he wanted to trade one king for another was disgusting to him,” added Gwaine.
“Say what you will about him being a brute, but he was clever in his own ways,” said Galahad.
“Aye, that he was. He caught on pretty fast to the “inner circle” of knights that our princess had going. It was for his own pride and status that he decided he needed to be a part of it,” said Gwaine.
“He played his cards well, playing the noble knight because he knew Arthur didn’t think too fondly of him,” said Percival.
“After he felt like Arthur had softened towards him, he went with the trying to impress Arthur route that everyone always tries. Though seeing it do nothing for Owain, he stopped after a couple days. That’s when he noticed our Merlin,” said Leon.
“Apart from putting on an act in front of Arthur, Valiant took joy in the suffering of his lessers,” said Elyan before finishing his ale. “As long as he wasn’t around, Valiant did whatever he wanted.”
“I remember this. He spotted Merlin, thinking he was like any other serving boy, and was about to order him around when another knight beat him to it. It was some other knight hopeful who stayed behind after the tourney,” said Kay.
“Sir Kent didn’t have a chance. As soon as he raised his hand to hit Merlin, Arthur appeared out of nowhere and caught his wrist before he could land a blow,” said Elyan.
“What happened to him?” asked a knight in the back.
“Feck knows,” said Gwaine with a snort.
“Anyway, Valiant saw Merlin in a new light after that. He did try bribing him as well, but he found out quickly enough that Merlin didn’t like him in the least,” said Percival.
“Some of the scullery maids overheard him saying how he would just strong-arm Merlin into giving him one of them clasps. News passed on from them to some of the stable hands, to some kitchen maids, to one particular maidservant, to the Lady Morgana herself,” said Lancelot.
“The Lady Morgana, being the Lady Morgana, took it upon herself to deal with the issue,” said Leon with a fond smile. “She stopped us knights from outright confronting Valiant and came up with a plan.
“She told us that Arthur needed to catch Valiant in the act. That way he could challenge the boar himself,” said Elyan.
“Amazing how quick the castle caught on. Nobody wanted Merlin to have to deal with Valiant’s attempted confrontations more than the once, so everyone took part in helping Merlin unknowingly avoid him,” said Percival with an amused chuckle.
“That was good fun. I remember the wee squire, Podrick was it, subtly kicking a bucket in front of Valiant. The swearing when Valiant stepped clear into the muck was a laugh,” said Bohrs with a grin.
“Aye,” said Gwaine. “Shows he has quick thinking going for him, the way Valiant was charging over towards Merlin. He’s even a knight hopeful now, isn’t that right, Pod?”
“Yes, sirs, I am,” said Podrick, sitting in the back with the rest of the young lads. Bohrs smiled at the several ‘well done’ slaps and punches that Podrick earned for that.
“There were various cases of tripping, misdirection, and even slight food poisoning to keep him away,” said Kay with a mischievous grin.
“It all came to ahead at the feast held for the newly knighted men,” said Elyan.
“Valiant’s patience was wearing thin so he was more likely to mess up,” mused Lucan.
“Exactly. And to top it all off, Morgana made sure that if Valiant were to suddenly disappear or die, that there would be no love lost when it came to Uther,” said Leon.
“And how did she do that?” asked another knight.
“She asked to be excused early from the feast because she didn’t appreciate the lingering stares she was getting,” said Gwaine moving on to his next drink. “She said that to Uther whilst glancing back in Valiant’s direction several times. Subtle without being subtle at all.”
“Uther narrowed his eyes at Valiant and of course let her go. He even asked Merlin to escort her back to her rooms,” said Elyan.
“Uther? Asked Merlin?” said a shocked knight.
“We were surprised too,” said Leon. “Hell, Arthur choked on his wine and asked his father outright why he was asking Merlin.”
“The king simply said that Merlin being a servant, would probably know of more discreet and hidden ways to get the Lady Morgana back to her room,” said Lancelot.
“Uther actually helped move along the plan. Now, this was before Merlin and Arthur were more than prince and manservant. So, obviously being the jealous and possessive princess that he is, he couldn’t wait more than ten minutes before going after them. Apparently ten minutes was way too long to escort someone all the way to the other side of the castle and return,” said Gwaine.
“You know I thought Arthur would miss them in that alcove behind the kitchen, but it’s like he has a sixth sense when it comes to Merlin,” said Kay. “Right as he was about the pass the kitchen, he just stopped. Then as he was about to keep walking, he heard a hiss and checked the alcove.”
“He expected to see Morgana and Merlin passionately snogging, but to his horror, he saw Merlin pinned to the wall. Valiant had Merlin’s arm twisted behind his back and was fiercely whispering something in his ear,” said Percival.
“I honestly thought he was going to run him through right then and there,” said Elyan.
“Me too. But it was a damn hard not to laugh outright when Arthur chucked his gauntlet at Valiant’s head,” said Percival.
“How on earth did you all manage to see, well, all of that?” asked another knight.
“Well, it’s no secret that Merlin and the Lady Morgana have magic. Okay, maybe it still is to Merlin, but not to the lady herself. We were all watching this from her scrying bowl in her chambers,” said Gwaine with a grin to several gobsmacked faces.
“Anyway, it was a fight until first blood because there was no way Arthur could justify a fight to the death over his servant. Uther agreed and the match was set for the following morning so Valiant didn’t have a chance to run away,” said Leon.
“It should have been an easy fight, but of course Valiant cheated. Morgana had a vision about the snakes on Valiant’s shield coming to life so she warned Merlin,” said Elyan.
“As soon as Valiant tried to activate his snakes, Merlin said some kind of counter spell. Only, it wasn’t exactly the right wording. What happened instead was Valiant himself turning into a giant snake,” said Lancelot.
“Merlin was about to run out there to defend Arthur himself, but Arthur being the perfect knight, took Valiant’s own confusion for the opportunity that it was and beheaded him on the spot,” said Leon, looking proud.
“It was pretty nasty to see the snake shrivel up into pieces of a very dead Valiant,” said Gwaine with a grimace.
“And Arthur was a damn sight more possessive of Merlin after that,” said Galahad with a chuckle.
“So again, no threats to Merlin. If you do, you’ll be out of here faster than Gwaine can finish his ale,” said Percival.
“You’ll be lucky if you make it out with everything in working condition,” said Bohrs, cracking his knuckles.
“Take our warnings to heart, and just be the best version of yourself,” said Lancelot with a warm smile.
“And this is where we leave you. Good luck to all, and goodnight,” said Leon with a nod.
“Come on, help me drag Gwaine's arse out of here,” said Elyan to Percival.
“Take our warnings to heart—”
“Lancelot already said that part, Gwaine,” Percival with an annoyed, but amused huff.
“Oh, right, well , good luck to you feckers! Inner inner circle, out!” slurred Gwaine.
“Oh, bloody hell, let’s get him out of here before the other men think that’s another thing to aim for,” said Elyan.
“Well, we are the inner inner circle,” said Lancelot, a few paces away from the tavern, holding back a grin.
“Not you too, Lancelot. Wait you too, Leon?” asked an exasperated Elyan.
“We don’t want the other knights even more jealous, do we,” said Leon, slapping Elyan on the back.
“Come, on mate, don’t tell me you didn’t think it true,” said Percival with an eyebrow raise.
“Well, alright, I suppose, but I didn’t realize it was something we acknowledged,” said Elyan.
“We don’t, only this drunkard does,” said Leon.
“Come on, let’s get back before Arthur or Merlin gets suspicious,” said Lancelot.
“Drinks back at mine!” cheered Gwaine.
The knights just stared at each other, shrugged their shoulders in the way that meant ‘why not,’ and headed for Gwaine’s chambers.
*
Bonus.
“Do they still think we don’t know that they do this every time?” said Merlin, standing in front of Arthur’s window, watching the knights head back to the castle.
“Let them have their fun,” Arthur drawled from his desk.
“It’s been seven years,” said Merlin, amused.
“Well, it does wonders in making the new knights work harder,” said Arthur, putting down the parchment he was reading.
“I know. I used to feel bad when I first found out they were making such a big deal out of all this, you know? But I’ve heard from the grapevine that there are no hard feelings,” said Merlin, toying with the hem of his tunic, “so I guess it’s okay.”
“Alright, spit it out. What’s bothering you,” said Arthur, standing up and joining Merlin at the window.
“I’m afraid the knights will hate me once they find out about my magic,” said Merlin staring out at the knights with a wistful look on his face.
“Is that all?” said Arthur with a huff.
“Arthur! You know this is a big deal for me. Remember how hard it was when I tried to tell you?” said Merlin, angry that Arthur was taking this so lightly.
“Well, you don’t have to worry about it because they already know,” said Arthur.
“WH-WHAT? WH-WHEN? WHAT??” said Merlin, whirling around to face Arthur.
Arthur tried very hard not to burst out laughing at Merlin’s indignant squawk.
“In fact, everyone knows. The entire castle. Well, everyone except Uther,” said Arthur.
Merlin turned pale at that and made his way over to sit on the bed.
“No one has said anything because they all love you and respect you. They know you’ll tell them when you’re ready,” said Arthur, joining Merlin on the bed.
“B-but how?” Merlin said in a small voice.
“Really, Merlin, you can’t be that much of an idiot. You’re really not as subtle as you think,” said Arthur with a smirk.
“I’ll give you subtle!” roared Merlin before his eyes flashed gold and Arthur's considerable amount of pillows suddenly started to attack the prince.
“Mer-Merlin! You can’t-this is treason!” Arthur shouted in half outrage and laughter as he battled his own pillows. As soon as he managed to swat the last one out of the way, he was tackled by Merlin.
“Do you yield?” said Merlin, panting but smiling his normally bright smile.
“To you? Always,” said Arthur, as if making a vow.
Merlin’s face softened at that, his guard completely down, so he didn’t expect Arthur to flip them over.
“And you? Do you yield?” asked Arthur, copying Merlin.
“Always,” said Merlin, out of breath.
“Good,” Arthur smiled before placing a chaste kiss on Merlin’s mouth.
“Prat,” said Merlin, beaming.
The end.