Chapter Text
On Friday, Josie came to the flower shop after her shift to buy flowers and go to her mother's grave.
Before Hope picked her out any, though, she asked, "Can I show you something?"
"Of course, babe." Josie replied with a casual smile.
Hope led Josie upstairs and into her painting room. It was a room just off the stairs and it was filled with canvases. There was plastic on the floor underneath her easel that was covered in multi-colored, little paint droplets. The room smelled like acrylics and it was filled with natural light.
Josie fell a little bit in love with it.
She wanted to bring a book and sit under the window and read while Hope worked on a painting.
She wanted to hold her place in her book with her finger to look up and watch Hope work instead.
She wanted to get up from her cross legged position on the floor and leave her book behind only to kiss Hope and let her accidentally get paint on her clothes when she kissed her back.
Josie hadn't even realized that she had stopped in the doorway of the room, lost in thought, until Hope spoke. She was standing in the middle of the room, self consciously looking around.
"Sorry about the room, it's a mess, but welcome to my painting room." She flicked on an overhead light to add with the sunlight streaming in from the windows.
"I love it," she said, and she meant it. She loved everything about this room.
Josie loved to imagine Hope here, completely in her element. She loved what this room represented.
The auburn haired girl beamed, but looked to the floor a little shyly a second later.
"Thank you for showing me this," the brunette added in.
"Oh, of course, but this wasn't what I wanted to show you."
Josie couldn't imagine what else she would have to show her, but her eyes filled with interest and curiosity, just like they were filled with wonder only moments ago. Hints of wonder still remained, though, and they sparked whenever she looked around again.
Hope walked to a cabinet and pulled out a painting. She turned it around after looking at it for a moment so that Josie could see.
It was the painting of Josie.
Hope didn't say anything, but her nervousness showed on her face.
Josie took a step closer, holding out one of her hands near the painting. "Wow," she breathed out. "This is- wow."
She was honestly left speechless. Josie looked at the painting of her and her mouth dropped open slightly. Her eyes were dancing with something else now, something akin to complete amazement.
"Do you like it? I painted it a little while ago, when we were, um, you know," she trailed off and got a sad look in her eyes before brightening again, "I hope it's okay."
"Hope, this is amazing." She put her hands on the edges and stared into the colors. Then she looked back up, "Thank you."
Hope beamed, "Do you want it? I can hang it in your apartment for you or I could hang it somewhere in here if you would rather."
Josie thought about this and looked around the room at the walls. They were semi-bare, but the spaces that were filled housed some of Hope's best work.
She kind of liked the idea of having her portrait hang on these walls.
"You mean, like, hang it in here? Your painting room?"
She nodded, "Yeah."
"I love it, but I think it belongs in here more than it belongs in my apartment. You painted it, and it's amazing, so it should stay here, with you."
Hope kind of liked the idea of always having it here, of always being able to see her. Especially in her painting room.
She smiled, "Okay. So, where should we put it?"
We.
We, as in, this was their thing, not just Hope's.
Josie couldn't help but grin.
"Um, how about over here?" She pointed towards a blank space next to the windows before walking over to it. She loved the windows.
"It looks like the perfect spot, Jo." Hope followed her over and handed the painting to her, "I'll go grab a hammer and a nail, babe, I'll be right back."
While she was gone, Josie stared at the painting and imagined it being created. The process that Hope went through, the time and the effort, just the sheer amount of thought that went into it.
And the fact that it had been done when they weren't on the best of terms meant that she had still been thinking about her.
The canvas in front of her meant a lot more than just the surface value.
For a second Josie allowed herself to think about Hope looking at this hanging on her wall while she worked, and maybe the thought that one day Josie would be sitting underneath it to watch that happen.
After that thought, Hope came back into the room and, a couple minutes later, had hung the painting up.
"It looks great, babe." Josie said.
"Thank you."
And with that, Hope put her arm around Josie's shoulder and pulled her closer, kissing her forehead in the process.
"I can get you some flowers now."
"Oh, great, thanks." She was almost sad to leave the room, to leave the painting.
They went back downstairs and Hope picked out some flowers.
But, after she had wrapped them in some ribbon and handed them to her, Josie didn't walk away from the counter.
Instead, she looked at Hope with a burning certainty of a decision that she had made in her eyes. "Will you come with me this time, babe? I want you to meet her."
Her voice was small despite the look in her eyes, almost like she was afraid that it would sound silly.
Hope didn't respond for a second, completely taken aback by this question.
Josie's Friday night time with her mom had always been sacred, and now she was asking her to join.
A small, surprised smile made its way onto her face and she said, in a voice where you could hear her smiling, "Of course I will."
Josie smiled back and waited as Hope came out from behind the counter and joined her by her side.
They left the shop and Josie led the way to her mother's grave, guiding her through a little cemetery a few blocks away.
When they stood in front of the gravestone, they were a few steps back from it. It had her name on the top, with a quote underneath the dates of her birth and death.
Josie spoke to Hope after a second of silence, "Is it okay if I talk to her? Like, would that be weird? It's just what I usually do when I come here."
"Of course it's okay, babe. It's not weird at all." She took her hand and squeezed to let her know that it was okay.
The other girl took a step forward to kneel and set the flowers down before standing back up and folding her hands. "Hi, mom. There's someone I want you to meet. Her name is Hope, and she's my girlfriend."
Hope looked at Josie for a beat before turning to the gravestone. "It's nice to meet you. I wish that we could have met in person. Your daughter is amazing, truly, and if you're even a little bit like her, I know I would have loved you. I'm really lucky to have her in my life."
Josie watched Hope with a small amount of tears in her eyes. She didn't know if she was crying from sadness or from something else.
Her gaze returned to the headstone and she talked as if she was alone. "I wanted to thank you. If it wasn't for you, I may never have gotten to know her the way I do today."
She took a step back to be by her girlfriend's side. Then she took her hand and inhaled a deep breath.
Afraid to ruin the moment, Hope asked her question in a small voice, "Really?"
Josie looked at her and smiled shakily, unsure, "Yeah. I never would have asked you out at the coffee shop, I was too scared and nervous. But when I started buying flowers every week, I worked up my confidence."
Hope wanted to thank Josie's mom too.
A little while later, they were walking back through the rows of graves to reach the exit in silence when Josie decided to break it.
"You know, I didn't use to work Monday morning shifts. I would sleep in before class and work in the evenings. But the morning I met you, the girl who usually worked then called in sick.
"Then I started requesting that shift, just in case you ever came back. I know that people have a coffee routine, they always come in at the same time, so I took a chance.
"And when you did come back the next Monday, and the one after that, I made sure I always had that shift. Whenever I wouldn't get it, I would switch with someone else just to make sure that I got to see you."
By this time, they were standing on the sidewalk and facing each other. Their hands rested effortlessly in each other's.
All of this made Hope a little stunned. After all, who knew? To think that she had been rearranging her schedule the entire time for her too.
Josie spoke again, "I know that you already told me that you probably never would have come into the shop that morning if it wasn't for the huge rush order of flowers, but I don't know why I never told you that I wasn't supposed to be there either."
Hope kissed her softly and pulled back to smile, a dreamy look in her eyes.
"I guess it was fate."
They walked hand in hand back to their spot in the park, and Hope knew that it was time.
When they sat down, their legs out in front of them and slightly intertwined, something clicked in Josie's brain, "You know how my mom and I always used to plan out those big trips?"
Hope nodded.
"Well we both knew that those trips were never going to happen, but we couldn't stop ourselves. They always had to be so elaborate, but now I think I just want something fun, something that could actually be done."
She hummed, thinking. "What about a road trip?"
"A road trip sounds perfect. I would rather that than what my mom and I always used to think about."
"We could do a road trip," she said in a low voice, walking her fingers up Josie's arm.
"I won't have class in the summer," she offered up, thinking it was only a casual suggestion.
"I'm sure this town can survive for a while without my shop being open," Hope reciprocated, beginning to break out into a grin.
They started to speculate before looking into each other's eyes and realizing just how serious both of them were.
Then they started to smile and giggle, Hope putting her hand on Josie's leg and leaning in to kiss her.
When she pulled back, she smirked with her eyebrows raised in a hopeful way and asked, "So, are we really doing this?"
"I think we are," she grinned.
Something sparked in Josie's eyes and she leaned in to kiss her again.
Hope wrapped her arms around her waist and pulled her closer, kissing her back.
A little while later, they were laying on their backs underneath the tree and staring up at the branches, dandelions surrounding them.
Their bodies were side by side, and their hands fell together in the small gap between them. Hope laid her other hand on her stomach while Josie laid hers beside her.
It was quiet, and it was calm. They could feel each other's breathing, slow and steady, and it was almost in sync. If they laid there long enough, they probably would have fallen asleep.
"Do you remember that saying my family and I use?" Hope murmured.
Of course she did. "Always and forever."
She hummed, "Do you remember what it means?"
"That your love will last always and forever, right?" She turned her head to look at her.
"Exactly." She smiled sleepily, the words bouncing back and forth in her brain.
Suddenly, Hope silently sat up and Josie followed suit, pushing herself up with her hands.
She looked at the dandelions beside her and hummed, picking one up and spinning it between her fingers like Josie does.
When Hope smiled, Josie asked, "What? Why are we smiling, babe?" There was a curious smile on her face, too.
Without looking up from the flower, Hope answered, "Do you remember when we came here on one of our first dates? Do you remember how you gave me one of these and told me to make a wish?"
She looked up at Josie to see her nod. She started talking again, but this time she was looking right into her eyes, the dandelion still between her fingers.
"My wish was that we would have many more dates, and that, on one of them, we would come back here and I could realize that everything worked out. My wish was for everything to work out."
Her wish was for Josie.
A beat passed and they both looked into each other's eyes.
Then Hope opened her mouth to let the words that had been dying to escape since day one fall out.
"I love you."
Josie's own mouth dropped open slightly, realizing just how much weight those words held for both of them.
Another beat passed as she let those words wash over her, trying to take them in.
"I love you too."
Hope broke out into a grin as her pounding heart began to settle.
The funny thing was, though, Josie's heart was completely calm. Saying those words to her was easy. It felt right.
They leaned forward and kissed each other.
Josie could have lived in this moment forever and she would have been inexplicably happy.
What Hope hadn't said earlier was that she had made a second wish that day too.
Her second wish was for Josie to fall in love with her, because she already knew she was going to fall in love with Josie.
She also hadn't mentioned the part about how she came back here whenever they weren't on the best of terms to get a dandelion to make the wish that they would be okay again.
This grove of dandelions meant a lot to both of them, but Josie had no idea how much it meant to Hope. This was one her favorite places, one of the places she felt most at peace, all because of the memories she shared there with Josie.
Hope broke away to look into her eyes and cup the right side of her face with her hand, running her thumb along her cheek.
"Always and forever."
Josie knew how much those words meant to her, and she knew the history behind them.
As much as she had wanted to be a part of her always and forever, hearing them felt different than she thought they would.
It felt definite.
There was something about the way she said it that she knew she meant it.
Josie melted into her touch and responded with the same thing, the same definite thing.
"Always and forever."
She hoped that she said it in the same way so that she knew she meant it too.
And she did mean it, they both did.
When those words were exchanged, an understanding passed between them. As much as both of them would fear heartbreak, it was a promise that they were for always and forever.
Josie moved back to kiss her again, her hands finding the back of her neck and her hair.
After their soft kiss, Hope spoke again, "I'm sorry I didn't say it sooner."
She had first realized that she loved her that night on the roof, when both of them confessed the stories of their past relationships.
That night also showed her why she hadn't said it before, let alone allowed herself to acknowledge the feeling.
She was scared.
Truth be told, she was terrified.
But Josie was worth it.
Josie was worth every risk she had ever had to take to get to this moment. She was worth it all.
And Hope knew that she would have taken all those risks again in a heartbeat for this moment, for this relationship, and for her.
So maybe, deep down, she had known she loved Josie since before that night on the roof, but that was the first time she really let herself feel it.
Josie, on the other hand, was the type to feel it early on. She fell hard and she fell fast. And, for Hope, she felt it like no other feeling before.
She started falling through the little things: their conversations, holding hands, chivalrous acts, walks, the things about Hope that Josie noticed when she observed her. She fell through coffees on Mondays and flowers on Fridays, and everything in between.
Josie felt it before she even knew what it was, before she wanted to give the feeling a name, but it had been there all along.
The reasons why she fell in love with her were infinitesimal, and she had fallen in love with everything along the way.
The stories of their loves that burned them both popped into their heads.
Hope's fear of it not being said back, and Josie's fear of saying it at all.
"I'm sorry too. But, I do love you. I've loved you for a long time."
"I've loved you for a long time too."
After finally saying it aloud, both of them wished that they had said it sooner. Despite this, it still felt right.
Sure, they might regret not saying it before, but they also liked the way it turned out, with a moment so perfect neither of them would have changed a thing.
The words felt right, and both of them just wanted to say them again. Their future was filled with a countless amount of I love you's.
This moment would forever be fixated in time for them, and it would live forever in their memories too. This moment was a part of their story.
A smile took up residency on both of their faces, and when they leaned in to kiss each other their smiles somehow managed to get bigger again.
Neither of them realized how long they had loved each other.
After all, how can you pinpoint the exact second in time that you fell in love with someone? The exact second where it turns into something more?
Is it a series of dominoes all leading up to the end of the row, when the final one finally falls and you're pushed over the edge into love?
Or is it all at once? When it just jumps up out of nowhere and catches you so off guard it knocks the breath out of you?
Both of their stories had a different ending on this subject, but their beginnings were the same.
The day in the coffee shop, the day they met, was when both of them fell in love, because that was the day the universe aligned so perfectly that they knew it was meant to be.