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English
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Published:
2020-12-08
Updated:
2020-12-12
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4,078
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3/6
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Kaleidoscope

Summary:

Seeing Marinette for the first time was like finally seeing color after a lifetime of black and white. She was absolutely covered in marks, a canvas of a million different colors coming together to form one kaleidoscope girl.

Adrien knew most people had more than three marks.

He just didn’t know that some people had so many.

It made sense once he got to know Marinette. She lived and loved so passionately, and people loved her for that. All of their classmates had vibrant red-pink marks. Whether they were dusted over knuckles or blazing color like Alya had across her entire forearm. Marinette had her mother’s deep red on her cheek, her father’s sky blue on her arm, and a million colors on her hands, like she had pressed them on a paint pallet.
-
Or, a soulmate AU where people leave bold colors on those who impact their lives the most, and Adrien has been a blank canvas his whole life.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Chapter 1: Collecting a Rainbow

Chapter Text

Adrien has always had 3 marks. One for his mother, one for his father, and one for Chloe. Chloe’s mark was a bright yellow handprint around his wrist, the mark of a childhood being dragged around by her. His mark on her took up her whole palm and the underside of her fingers; it looked like she had dipped her hand in radioactive green paint. His father’s mark was a lavender splotch on his right shoulder, bold and opaque. The mark Adrien left on his father’s fingers was a watery one. His parents had planned the marks they would leave on him; they had chosen to leave one on each of his infant shoulders. Adrien’s left shoulder was a vivid baby blue, and his mother’s knuckles were painted with the brightest lime green.

When she disappeared, he would trace the still bright color on his shoulder and wonder what could’ve taken her from him but death.

-

Seeing Marinette for the first time was like finally seeing color after a lifetime of black and white. She was absolutely covered in marks, a canvas of a million different colors coming together to form one kaleidoscope girl.

Adrien knew most people had more than three marks.

He just didn’t know that some people had so many.

It made sense once he got to know Marinette. She lived and loved so passionately, and people loved her for that. All of their classmates had vibrant red-pink marks. Whether they were dusted over knuckles or blazing color like Alya had across her entire forearm. Marinette had her mother’s deep red on her cheek, her father’s sky blue on her arm, and a million colors on her hands, like she had pressed them on a paint pallet.

-

On his first day, he tries to scrape gum off of Marinette’s seat. He sees why people hate Chloe, but all he can remember is those nights alone when he traced the bright honey yellow of his wrist. All he can remember is that her hand is just as bright.

-

Nino puts his hand up for a fist bump a week into their epic friendship. He looked into Adrien’s eyes and gave him a crooked smile. When they bumped fists, both of them pulled back with vibrant knuckles. Adrien couldn’t stop beaming for the rest of the day.

-

One day, he walks into his father’s office and sees that his jaw has been painted a striking red. Adrien thinks of baby blue and movie nights and golden portraits. He doesn’t comment.

-

He’s added to Marinette’s gallery of marks on the first day he meets her. There’s an umbrella and rain and their hands touch for just a moment. When he pulls away, red-pink dominates every inch of where they touched. He looks at her and sees that her paint pallet hand has been buried under an opaque layer of lime green. He’s never seen a mark so bright, let alone one from him.

-

He meets Ladybug the same day, and he thinks of reaching out, trying to touch. Their suits cover every inch except for their faces. Sometimes, he wants to ask her to press her cheek to his. He knows what she would say.

-

Adrien is alone a lot. Between activities and superhero duties, he mostly sits alone in his room. He used to fill the time learning a million new skills and playing every game he could get his hands on. Nowadays, he likes to lay in bed and stare at the ceiling. He brings his hands up to count each mark. One for his father, endless dull lavender. Two for his mother, baby blue and bright. Three for Chloe, a yellow lifetime of being pulled along. Four for Marinette, for being one addition to her kaleidoscope skin. Five for Nino, who was the only friend who offered it to him.

-

He and Ladybug end up a little tied up by an akuma victim. As they sway back and forth in her tangled yo-yo, their cheeks brush for one instant. The moment he gets home he sprints to the bathroom, and he tries not to cry while looking at his colorless face.

-

Adrien never stops checking his mother’s mark. It’s the first thing he does in the morning, and the last thing he does at night. Every time feels like it might be the last. He endlessly stresses and anxiously worries that one day he will be greeted by a blank shoulder.

His father is distant. Adrien tortures himself wondering which came first, his father’s disappointment or the thin green coating his fingers.

-

Alya leaves burnt orange where she and Marinette brushed forearms. She leaves another streak on Nino’s upper arm where she reached out to steady him. Adrien agonizes over whether or not she’ll leave an autumn colored mark on him. One day, Marinette trips into both of them, and she graces him with a line of orange on his face where she accidentally smacked him. He doesn’t even care about his father’s rage over his new facial feature.

-

He and Ladybug are sitting on the beams of the Eiffel Tower when he summons the courage to bring it up. She brushes her hand lightly over her cheek and says that soulmate marks don’t show up when she’s transformed. He’s known that since Alya marked him; he was ready to put on 20 layers of concealer, but when he transformed his skin was clear as those lonely days before. He bets that Ladybug loses more marks than him, she’s easy to love.

-

Adrien has become addicted to the feeling of connecting his marks. His mother used to press her knuckles to his shoulder, sitting in the garden or reading on the couch. He’s started to reach his hand toward Nino while sitting next to him at school, waiting for the other boy to close the distance. Alya greets him by putting her hand to his cheek now. Chloe continues to pull him places. He stretches his hand toward Marinette; he doesn’t understand why she never meets him halfway.

-

His father presses transparent green fingers to his shoulder the day the Gorilla is akumatized. The feeling of it is unfamiliar and slightly uncomfortable, but he’s wanted it so long he doesn’t care. He catches Natalie with her hand over his father’s jaw, and he thinks of blue blue blue and striking red and thinks maybe he’d be okay with it if it weren’t for his still-strong painted shoulder.

-

Ladybug and him are detransformed in a dark sewer when they brush hands. He thinks he feels the tell-tale heat of a mark forming. He thinks she must feel it too. When he gets home he checks his hand obsessively for any red, but he only finds Marinette’s bold mark.

-

Adrien is building up a collection of marks, more than he ever thought he’d have. His classmates and friends leave bursts of color over his skin from barely-there watercolor to pure ink. Luka leaves a lovely aqua; Kagami leaves a navy blue. He thinks of his younger self tracing three marks over and over and knows that he never expected this. His smile is radiant and his eyes are glowing and his skin is slowly collecting a rainbow.

-

Marinette comes in with a thin neon purple mark on her shoulder. It’s a testament to how wild their lives are that no one doubts her when she says it’s from Jagged Stone.

-

Holding hands with Ladybug feels so right. He can’t explain it. Chat Noir and Ladybug are a dynamic duo, and he obviously loves her, but holding hands feels special. It feels like it’s meant to be.

-

He stretches his hand out to Marinette again. She squeaks, but meets him halfway. It feels like it’s meant to be.

Chapter 2: Drowning in Lavender

Summary:

Ladybug has been looking at him strangely recently. He wonders if she’s imagining his face covered in a confetti shower of rainbow marks. He wonders if she’s thinking of pressing her cheek to his, if she’s thinking that this time it has to stick.
He takes her hand and they run across the rooftops of Paris. It feels like it’s meant to be.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Every mark he receives paints someone else’s hand green. He doesn’t know how to reach for what he wants, how to make that final connection. He wants to be content letting things happen to him.

After the fact is a different story, he needs to hold all those who have left a colorful brand on his skin close. He’s been without so long.

He wants to reach for Ladybug. She’s so close. And when he stretches his hand to her, she meets him halfway. Ladybug and Chat Noir against the world.

-

It’s harder without her. He’s nervous all the time and no watercolor marks take away from his father’s crushing need for perfection. Sometimes, when the stress gets to be too much, he’ll vault to a random rooftop and trace his boldest marks. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Six. But then he’ll think of one who is cruel, two who is gone, and three who he doesn’t know anymore. The lavender of his father’s mark begins to itch against his skin.

-

At school, Adrien’s world seems almost alright. Sitting next to Nino, casually chatting with Alya and Marinette. Four, five, six. Sometimes, the old marks he was so grateful for seem to suffocate him. He thinks of burnt orange, cobalt blue, and a shade just between red and pink. It’s an atrocious color scheme, but he loves it either way.

-

Nathalie’s mark on his father is bold. Adrien can’t help but burn with jealousy. He’s been trying his whole life to push beyond the predetermined insignificance that the weak green of his father’s fingers has thrust upon him. He thinks of searing red Nathalie and his baby blue mother and realizes he never stood a chance. He just wants to be wanted.

-

Ladybug has been looking at him strangely recently. He wonders if she’s imagining his face covered in a confetti shower of rainbow marks. He wonders if she’s thinking of pressing her cheek to his, if she’s thinking that this time it has to stick.

He takes her hand and they run across the rooftops of Paris. It feels like it’s meant to be.

-

Their little group of four continues to be close-knit. All of them relish in the assurance of opaque smudges on their skin He’s never felt as calm and comfortable as he does pressed into Marinette’s couch and surrounded by love. Nino’s elbow is digging into his side, and his arm has fallen asleep, trapped under a dozing Marinette. It’s perfect. Adrien finally relaxes his shoulders; he finally lets himself breathe. Maybe he’ll be okay.

-

Adrien has always been the type of person who doesn’t hang up first. He soaks in attention like a plant growing to the sun. He basks in it. Every bit of suffocation feels okay once his father gives him a simple hum of approval. His mother loved him so much it felt like drowning, sometimes. Now she’s gone, and he still can’t take in air.

-

His mark on Marinette refuses to be covered. Any mark she receives on that hand fades under the pure radiance of his radioactive green. He hasn’t had the same issue; he still can’t bring himself to reach his hands out.

-

Rose laughs as she pokes a watery pink beauty mark on his cheek. Sabrina leaves an almost translucent line of orange down his arm; she truly didn’t mean to touch his skin. She was falling and had to catch herself, green barely tints her palm.

Chloe still fumes.

-

The Gorilla pulls him out of the way of a bicycle, and his hands leave gray smudges on Adrien’s arms. Nathalie’s palm rests on his clavicle while she reassures him that his father is just busy. It’s a strange break from her normal coldness. The cloudy red she leaves is brighter than the diaphanous green that coats the underside of her hand. He tries not to let that sting.

Her red almost encroaches on his mother’s lovely blue. That stings no matter what he does.

He’s happy for his father, really. He just feels like he’s being left behind.

His home fills with whispers and secrets and closed doors. Sometimes, Adrien wonders if they’re concealing more than a love affair.

His father’s door remains sealed shut.

-

Ladybug takes his hands and spins him around in an arching circle, he almost feels his feet leave the ground. She’s laughing so hard she snorts, and he’s never been so glad for patrol. His hand tingles in her grip. They chase each other across Paris, elated and alive. The world is just so beautiful, only the two of them. The city of lights shines all the brighter; it feels like it’s meant to be. He leans into her arms, and she meets him halfway.

-

Chat Noir hits the ground running. He’s exhausted and his ribs hurt and they still don’t know where the akuma is. He drops onto all fours as he pushes himself to the limit, Adrien can’t be too slow. He takes a hit for Ladybug, and he’d do it again. He doesn’t have many precious people, and he can’t afford to lose another. He thinks of blue blue blue.

-

Marinette is sure that they’re soulmates. It doesn’t make sense for them not to be. Chat Noir should be leaving a strong and prominent black mark on her skin. She should be decorating his with her red-pink. It doesn’t make sense; he’s one of the most important people in her life. Why does the universe get to decide how much he impacts her? She feels anger boil low in her chest and tries to fight the frustrated tears gathering in her eyes.

-

Two teenaged superheroes sit in their bedrooms lamenting the fact that the universe is denying their closeness. Two kwamis barely keep their mouths shut.

Notes:

Heyyy chapter 2. Once again I am asking look at my youtube Geminii Doodles. Thanks again to my pals on the Superior Miraculous Server.

Chapter 3: the Distinction Between Deliberate and Unintentional

Summary:

Marinette bets that Chat Noir is covered in marks, just like her. She thinks his skin must look like a wall of graffiti, wild and vivid and so very like him. She can’t imagine it any other way; Chat Noir is easy to love.

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

They’ve decided to mark each other.

They won’t accept any other outcome.

Their hands shake between them, clasped tight. They both know the enormity of this moment, the gravity of purposeful marks. But they’re ready. They stand firm in their decision.

So the two detransform in a brilliant flash of light, and sit across from each other with their eyes soundly shut.

Adrien faces Marinette, and it feels like it’s meant to be.

They talked about it before, where they wanted their marks. Chat Noir thinks of poisonous lavender he can’t remove, a bitter tattoo blossoming on his skin. He resolves that if anyone can cover the mark, it would be her. He still loves his father, but the whispers in his home are getting louder and louder. There is something insidious in the very foundation of the Agreste mansion; Adrien just wants to escape before he’s smothered. So he takes off his shirt, and he faces his lady. She reaches out her hand; he meets her halfway. Her touch rests solidly on his right shoulder, and there is pure trust in the action, an overwhelming surety that the other’s eyes are sealed. The two wait a moment in the still air before turning away from each other.

He can’t help the tears that escape when he sees the lavender still coating his skin. The silence that engulfs them is deafening, and it follows them both all the way home.

Marinette wants to scream in frustration at her still multicolored hand.

Adrien lays in his bed tracing his six rich marks, endlessly wishing for a seventh.

-

They don’t try again.

But they want to.

-

Marinette’s parents like to brush over her marks at any opportunity. Her mother cups her face and runs a thumb over her cheek; her father sets a reassuring hand on her arm. Adrien watches all this and thinks of the lime green knuckles that used to rest on his shoulder and the gossamer green coated fingers that he’s so rarely felt. Marinette’s family is so lovely. Their quartet mostly congregates at the bakery, and Adrien cherishes every moment.

-

Chloe grabs his wrist one day at school. The flashy green of her palm lines up with the slightly faded yellow of his wrist. She holds his gaze for a long minute. He thinks of play dates and childhood games. He thinks of tracing over yellow every night, of treasuring her green hand.

He feels like he doesn’t know her anymore.

He still loves her.

-

Marinette has marks covering her arms, she has marks on her cheeks and her shoulders. She is covered in lines and dots that paint a brilliant rainbow: kaleidoscopic. She wonders if she’s ever met civilian Chat; she wonders if one of her easily gained marks is reflected on his skin too. Any other answer seems heinous. She’s a girl known for the number of hues spread across her skin.

It’s never been this hard before.

-

The heavy atmosphere of his home continues to drag him down. The paranoia consumes him. What is his father hiding? He remembers the time before his mother’s disappearance, the silence, and the secrets. He might be paralyzed under his father’s gaze, but he can’t take losing him.

Even while Adrien becomes a more colorful canvas, lavender is steady on his skin. He’ll always have his father’s pertinence resting on his shoulder.

-

Ladybug says to hell with destiny. Chat Noir is her partner, and she’s choosing him. Chat Noir doesn’t even consider not picking his lady. It’s not romantic, at least not in this moment, but their steadfast and steely commitment could win over a soul mark any day.

-

Gabriel didn’t choose Nathalie’s bright red.

He has it anyway.

-

Adrien is sitting next to Marinette in the park, lazily watching the clouds pass over a baby blue sky. Alya and Nino are running late, their excited texts saying something about getting a real wicker basket for their picnic. He puts his hand near Marinette, careful and unsure and aching. She slowly inches her fingers closer. As their marks touch, they fill with warmth. It feels like it’s meant to be. When Alya and Nino arrive to complete their quartet, they find two teenagers asleep under the warm afternoon sun, hands clasped. The two couldn’t decide whether they should let them sleep peacefully, or pour cold water on both of them. The resulting shrieks tell exactly which path they choose.

-

He had to sneak out of his window to even get to the park.

-

Every day his shoulder remains its calming baby blue he wonders even more. His mother is alive; she’s out there somewhere. Is she in danger? Is something keeping her from him? Or did she choose to leave? Every day he gets closer to concluding that she decided her green knuckles and her bright-eyed son weren’t enough to make her stay. His sadness is turning to bitterness, souring into an acerbic burn. He never wants to be mad at his mom, but since she disappeared he’s been asphyxiating in his own home. She loved him so much. And now she’s gone.

They’d been happy once.

Hadn’t they?

-

Gabriel has started to spend more time in his cathedral of chrysalises. Mostly he keeps his eyes fixed on Emilie’s face. He wonders if she would hate him for his red jaw, for Nathalie’s lavender hand. Emilie had smiled at him often and held his hand as much as she could. She was brighter than him, shining, and he never felt completely deserving of her light. Their marks were first tattooed when infatuation became something more, when she reached out and he met her halfway. He remembers a young couple holding hands for the first time; he remembers holding her hand for the last time.

The light in the cathedral is dim.

-

Adrien didn’t mean to snoop. He really, really didn’t. But that doesn’t change the fact that he sees his father open an actual secret door in his office. He’s angry, all of a sudden, instead of sad. Golden portraits and secrets and red jaws are adding up to a terrible picture he doesn’t want to see. He can’t breathe. He tries to remember the places his father pressed to access the passageway, but while Adrien is smart, he doesn’t have a photographic memory. He’ll have to wait this one out. He is so, so tired of waiting.

-

He’s not always playing detective, and these months are somehow the worst and the best part of his lifetime. One moment is endless sun, best friends, and inside jokes he’d never had before. Nino has taken to giving him bear hugs before he goes home, and Alya has started to bump their shoulders while they walk. Marinette remains shy and odd around him. Sometimes, he wonders if it’s the pressure of their matching vibrant hands. She’s warming up to him, though, and every video game session and terrible joke and picnic in the sun brings them closer. He is incandescent with happiness; he’s burning with it, and it’s an unfamiliar energy. His mother loved him, but no matter how hard she tried, it took more than 2 people to fill the yawning emptiness of their home. Now he has all these people, a rainbow color scheme on his skin, a life outside the walls of the Agreste mansion that’s spirited and full. He has time with Ladybug, endless adrenaline, and the weightless feeling he gets running along rooftops. She’s like the sun. He never feels brighter than when he’s by Ladybug’s side, reflecting her light, or when he’s with his friends.

And that’s why going home gives him such whiplash. Somehow, home is worse than ever. When his father isn’t there, the high ceilings make him feel impossibly small, yet he feels choked and claustrophobic all the time. When Father is there tension is high. He’s not sure if it’s from the weighty pressure of expectations, or if it’s from the words they haven’t said, the things they’ve hidden. All he knows is that the only thing his father can look at over dinner is his mother’s empty chair. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t looking too.

He feels like he’s leading a double life, in more ways than one.

-

Every time he tries to give up on his father he can’t. Even with all this, every smile from his father makes him burn with happiness; all he can think of is piano duets, brief hugs, and hums of approval. All he can think of is that he loved her too. Father loved his mother so much, and he and Adrien share the same baby blue. His mother wanted them to be a happy family, and now they’re a family of two. So he grins and bears it, giving his father sunshine smiles and loyalty he never earned.

-

Ladybug is throwing popcorn in the air while he catches it in his mouth. At first, she throws them directly at his face in easy to catch tosses, but as the night wears on she starts to fling them wildly, watching as he twists and jumps. After a while, they notice that the area around them is littered with popcorn kernels, and the street below their rooftop escape is no better. They turn to each other and dissolve into fits of giggles. Then they’re talking about everything and nothing, relishing in their rare moment of peace. All the while, Ladybug pitches puffs of popcorn into the air at random intervals while he catches them, both totally in sync. She turns to him, and she stops the rain of popcorn for one moment.

“When this is all over,” she says carefully, “when Hawkmoth is gone, we’ll have days like this all the time. I want to know you, kitty. I want to see your face and try all your favorite foods and see every color on your skin.”

“When this is all over,” he breathes out, “When it’s done.”

She reaches out; he meets her halfway.

-

Marinette bets that Chat Noir is covered in marks, just like her. She thinks his skin must look like a wall of graffiti, wild and vivid and so very like him. She can’t imagine it any other way; Chat Noir is easy to love.

-

Sometimes, Nathalie looks at the lavender of her hand and wonders. She has a baby blue streak on her arm, one that had been unexpectedly bright when she’d gotten it. She wonders if the brightness is the result of her shaky almost-one-sided, almost-love with Gabriel, or if she’ll really be able to help bring Emilie back. She wears long sleeves all the time now, no need to kick up a fuss about marks already made.

She hadn’t really known Emilie, or loved her, but she’d wanted to.

It’s a shame they ended up here instead.

Notes:

Many thanks to my lovely beta reader magicianofesperance!! Additionally, a thank you to hiyall03 for helping with character work! If you like angsty Adrien, and would like to see more, check out my youtube! I've got quite a few miraculous animatics I learned how to embed links for that, so I would appreciate it if yall would check it out!!

Notes:

Check out my tumblr gem-minnie and my youtube Geminii Doodles! I make miraculous animatics :-D
Thanks to everyone on the Superior Miraculous Server Discord!