Chapter Text
"Oh my days, Victor, I can honestly say that I have never ever tasted such amazing cocktails!" Joyce exclaims one more time, as her and Bert are gathering their belongings and wits, ready to hobble back to their house. It's late now, and they see an alligator dragging itself off the road, a few metres down. "Is this how they make them in Mexico?" She pronounces it 'May-hee-co', which grates on Jane's nerves.
"Victor, buddy," Bert turns to call out for Vaas, pointing at the brand new fencing surrounding their plot of land. "You've got to show me how you did this. Gators destroyed mine, believe it or not."
Vaas - Victor - runs out to meet Bert and begins chatting excitedly about his latest home improvement project. All Jane had had to do, for this one, was to glare once at a rotting post - two days later, the whole fence had been replaced by Vaas himself. Joyce lingers to speak to Jane, her cheeks red with alcohol and happiness. Jane just wants to go to bed. She's had enough of playing house today.
"Nina, honey," Joyce says, because she's one of those people who look middle aged and act motherly to you even though they're only a couple years older. "Between you and me. I'm not blind." Jane's eyes whip round to hers. "I can see what's going on, here. And I don't know what happened and the ins and outs and who did what to whom...but if what he's done wasn't bad enough for you to leave him, then you must forgive him. That man is starving for affection, and he has eyes only for you. That's all I'm going to say about that. You know I care about you." She taps Jane's belly. "Stress isn't good for the little one."
"Come on honey! Let's give these two a little peace."
Joyce gives her one last meaningful look before heading into the dark after her husband. Only Vaas and Jane remain. She heads back inside without so much as a look in his direction.
Fuck Joyce and her empty advice. She's doesn't know anything.
Jane heads to the bathroom, not bothering to tidy up. Vaas will do it anyway - he won't let her just do things, he always has to be there, always has to help. All the neighbours think it's adorable. She cannot stand to be in the same room as him.
Jane runs herself a deep bath and sinks in. She hates looking at her pregnant belly. She's about 33 weeks now, not that she's particularly keeping track. The baby has started kicking at her, and it's like growing a little alien in her body. The feelings of love are getting harder to combat, though, now the foetus is a baby that jumps when she drops something, or when the neighbour's dog barks at the postman. Amazing what they can hear. She knows Vaas is desperate to feel her belly.
Everything just makes her want to cry, Joyce and her kindly advice especially.
Her head resting against the edge of the bathtub, Jane closes her eyes, and her thoughts drift back to the events that followed Vaas's decision to call the CIA.
*
The man in the white suit was called Willis Huntley. He was a CIA agent, and so was Sam Becker. Sam Becker had been undercover for the past couple of months - he had been dispatched following Jane's disappearance, after she had reported her friends missing, and, excruciatingly, after her family had contacted the British embassy and kicked up a huge fuss.
The plane took them somewhere in Nepal, where they would eventually be handed new identities, and explained the process of entering the witness protection program. Hoyt had disappeared, taken away swiftly as soon as the plane landed.
They'd sat in an office with Willis and Sam, and another officer. From the conversation, Jane came to understand that Vaas had been approached before but never chose to cooperate. It probably did speak volume, however, that he'd never revealed this to Hoyt. They were offering him full pardon, an American passport, a new identity, help to get a job...and the same thing to Jane. All he had to do was tell them all about Hoyt, all about his business and his clients.
And Vaas talked.
The magnitude of what he had done, of who he was, dawned on Jane with a growing sense of horror. There was so much. Every crime possible. On the third week, the agents began showing him pictures of people that had gone missing. All ages, all countries. Vaas recognised a large amount of them, but had to say that he had seen so many people over the years that it all blurred together now. He knew Hoyt had kept a catalogue, though. Jane did not share a room with him the entire time they stayed in Nepal. They would meet at breakfast, go speak to the agents, she would sit with him in the afternoon whilst he got his antibiotics and stitches. The doctors were very good, also supporting him with his sobriety.
The agents always had more questions. They were very interested in the whole concept of Jungle Fever, and as soon as Vaas revealed that there was footage of what it had done to the island, Jane saw the glint it gave to the agents' eyes, and it wasn't pretty. And still, they had more and more to ask.
It took weeks, and the whole time Vaas was clutching onto his side. They wanted the information first, then they'd let him see a doctor. Intel in the morning, medical care in the afternoon.
"Can I see a doctor too?" Jane asked, sometime during the sixth week.
"Sure," replied the agent. "What's the problem?"
"I just need to know if I'm pregnant. There's a chance I might be pregnant."
The agent threw her a look of utter contempt, but logged her request anyway. Jane felt pure rage swell inside her. How dare he judge her, this man who lied, spied and killed for a living?
She could feel Vaas's eyes on her, and just knew they were full of shock, and also maybe a splash of wonder. In that moment, Jane hated him, too. What did he think would happen, when he emptied himself inside her? And how dare he be happy about it? She had not looked at him directly since.
They saw a doctor. He confirmed to Jane that she was indeed in the very early stages of pregnancy. Explained to her what the options were, should she choose to terminate the pregnancy. Out of the corner of her eyes, Jane saw Vaas flinch when she said she'd like to go ahead and end it. Sod him.
Jane wasn't able to go through with it.
She cried so much that the nurses told her that clearly, she didn't want to terminate the pregnancy. Jane sobbed and sobbed and never managed to explain her feelings that day. Ironically, Vaas was the one to comfort her, holding her, speaking softly to her, kissing her head, and she clung to him, but never once met his eyes. She hadn't touched him since.
The true extent of her anger, however, only revealed itself once the agent explained to them that they would never be able to see their families again.
"So, last but not least," said the agent, "new names. Have you given it any thought?"
"Victor," said Jane, remembering her dream. "And Nina." Not Juliet, Juliet had been a romantic choice. Vaas only ever called her nena anyway.
"Victor," repeated Vaas. "I like that." He put a hand on her knee and she shifted it out of his reach.
"Last name?"
"McLovin."
"No!"
Damn. He was smart. In her outrage, she had looked at him. His hair was beginning to grow, and the dark purple bags under his eyes were gone. He looked more normal. Handsome.
"Not that," Jane told the agent, tearing her gaze away from Vaas.
"Let's just go with the most common name in Mexico, " said the agent, sounding extremely bored. He typed loudly on his keyboard, and Jane suspected this was just for show. "Gomez. Victor Gomez, Nina Gomez, maiden name.... " more fake typing, "Jones. You got married last year, July 1st, congratulations. Remember to put your rings on."
The agent then launched into a well rehearsed explanation of what the witness protection program entailed, what support they were entitled to, what to do to stay safe.
"...a top tip is to never use your real name even in private conversation," droned agent Huntley, "you must forget your previous attachments and when asked, make sure to both be orphans, the details will be in your packs . You will not be allowed to take the Life Story document with you therefore I suggest you spend the rest of your stay here memorising it as well as your significant other's -"
"Excuse me, how long will we be on this program?" Jane asked.
"How long?"
"Yes," said Jane, "how long" .
Huntley shrugged.
"Indefinitely."
"But...But surely, once the whole organisation is shut down, once you've got all these people that he-" she nodded towards Vaas -"has been telling you about, surely then, we can leave, right?"
"You can leave now, if you want."
Jane blinked.
"We can?"
"You can, " he specified, pointing at her. "We have a couple more questions for him. But once we're done here, you're both free to go back to wherever you came from. Nobody is forcing you to join the witness protection program, Mrs Gomez. We do strongly advise you against resuming any form of contact with your previous life, of course, for your own safety, but if you decide that you want to go..." He waved a dismissive hand. " ...it's on you. "
"My safety? But... But once you've arrested all these men-"
"We will never arrest all these men," said Huntley. "There will always be more. There will always be someone waiting for their chance to get revenge, or to prove themselves. It will never be over. Know that."
"So you're telling me I can never see my family again?"
"I'm telling you you can do whatever the fuck you want," snapped Huntley, "at your own risk. And at the risk of your loved ones. I'd think carefully about my options if I were you."
The devastation Jane felt as understanding dawned on her had never left her since.
*
Sometimes, she forgets while she's asleep, and when she wakes up the next day she has this feeling that something isn't right before suddenly remembering that she will never see her family again. Worse than that, they still do not know what happened to her. Last she googled it, her parents were still on Rook, trying to find answers. Vaas had done that to her. To them. Vaas was the one who'd stolen her away from her life, the one who'd dragged her through hell, and who'd got her onto this protection program. He thinks he did the right thing, he says often. If he'd taken Hoyt's deal, he's have lost his mind again, and then what? Jane would have forever been owned by Hoyt. They may never have escaped, and if they had, they would have had no protection program and the risks would have been the same. He frequently launches into this explanation, which she knows is right, until she snaps and yells at him to shut up. It's unbearable.
She can leave now, if she wants.
Nothing is actually forcing her to stay, and Joyce is infuriatingly right: either Jane needs to divorce Vaas - Victor - or she has to forgive him. She cannot carry on with the level of stress and loathing, some of it directed at herself, that she feels in this moment in time. She cannot continue being this huge, fat dragon that yells at her husband. She knows that she cannot return to her family, of course, but she can walk away from Vaas. Maybe it would be better for him. He's escaped Citra, then Hoyt, then drugs...to now be yelled at by yet another master: his pregnant wife. Maybe he would also be better starting again without her.
She needs to speak to him.
*
She corners him as he returns from the garden, just before lunch. He finds her sitting at the kitchen table, and it's the first time they make eye contact in weeks.
"Hey," says Jane, "do you want to sit down a minute? I think we need to talk."
Vaas is visibly shaken, and she can see straight away that he is expecting the worst. He remains frozen to the spot, looking at her. Jane points at the chair opposite hers, inviting him. Vaas walks to it and sets his hand on the back of it, but does not sit down.
"Ok, I'll get straight to the point," Jane sighs. "Basically, I just don't think we can carry on like this. Not talking, not looking at each other... it's suddenly occurred to me that, even though we can't really leave this protection program, we don't actually have to stay in it together. We don't actually have to stay married. Nina and Victor can get a divorce."
"Don't," Vaas bursts suddenly. "Don't. Don't do this. Just- just tell me what you want me to do. I'll do anything, you just name it. What about this wall, huh?" He leaves his spot and walks over to the magnolia coloured walls. "You hate this colour, right? I'll paint it. What colour do you want?"
"Wait-"a
"No, no, you tell me, I'll do anything it takes. What will it take, huh? You want me to be Vaas again?
Jane blinks.
"What?"
"I can do that. You liked me better when I was Vaas, right? I'll be that again. I can do it again. I'll get the mohawk back, I'll-"
"No, wait, Vaa-I mean, Victor-"
"Just tell me what you want!" He barks, his eyes wide and desperate. She doesn't miss the way his gaze darts briefly to her belly. He is terrified to lose them both. "Just tell me! I'll do anything, be anything!"
"Just be quiet!" Jane shouts back. "Sit down, and let me finish!"
Vaas's hands go to grab his head, now covered with black curls, the scar only visible on his forehead. He takes a couple of deep breaths and then goes to sit stifly on the chair opposite hers, facing her like a man awaiting judgement.
"Thank you," Jane says. "I was saying, that we do not have to stay married. I was going to say that we cannot continue being married like this, with me not acknowledging you. It's not right, it feels awful, and... and I hate myself, to be honest. I hate being like this with you. Joyce said to me the other night-"
"Fucking Joyce-"
"Let me finish," Jane raises her voice. Vaas's mouth snaps shut. "Joyce said to me, that if whatever you did was not bad enough to make me leave you, then I should forgive you." Jane takes a deep breath, and breaks eye contact, choosing instead to focus on the little chip in the wood, by her right hand. "And I think she was right. I can't carry on like this, it's poisoning me. And when the baby is here, I can't be like this. So, I tried thinking to myself whether I do want to go and be on my own, and..." her heart begins to beat faster. Up until this instant, she had not quite made up her mind, but now she knows, crystal clear. "I don't want to leave you. The truth is, I want to move on. With you. I want to forgive you."
Saying it out loud quite literally feels like shaking off a huge weight from her shoulders. The relief is so intense that Jane - Nina - feels tears burn at the corners of her eyes.
"I want to forgive you. And...and I hope you can forgive me, too," she sobs, "for how awful I have been with you since we got here. I am so, so sorry."
She hears him stand up and make his way over, and when his hands tentatively begin to pull her shoulders towards him and grabs onto him and wraps her arms around his middle, desperate to feel close to him again. He reponds with as much desperation, his hold almost painful. He's saying something to her but Nina cannot hear him for how much she is crying. The baby kicks in her belly, and she grabs Victor's hand and brings it flat against the baby's foot. Victor falls to his knees and holds on, his face coming to rest against her belly. The baby kicks and kicks again, and Victor lets out a strangled half cry, half laugh. Nina strokes his hair and holds him back.
They remain like this for a while, and after that, things begin to get better.
*
There are many old wives tales as to what you can do to bring your labour on once your baby is late, and one of them is to have sex.
Nina and Victor had not planned to have sex on the day her labour starts, but it did just work out that way. They were both in the bath, Nina's aching body finding some relief with the diminished gravity. The baby loves baths, always wriggling around more than at any other time. Both of Victor's hands are flat over Nina's belly, ready to catch the slightest movement. His hair is wet, and he looks happy, content, and oh so handsome.
Nina's hands go to his hair and mould it into a mohawk, without her quite being aware of what she is doing. His green eyes rise up to meet hers, searching. A familiar heat awakens between them. Without a word, he helps her out of the bath and to the bedroom.
Nina gives birth the next morning.