Chapter Text
Noah Tomlinson is six years old and he is very smart.
Or, at least everyone in his family tells him so. He likes to think that he is very smart and could fix any problem that arose today, because it’s a very special day. Probably the most special day, actually. His Daddies are finally getting married today, they’re finally going to show everyone how much they love each other.
Only the thing is, his Daddy won’t stop crying.
“Daddy,” Noah says nervously, reaching out to shake his father’s shoulder. “Daddy, it’s time to calm down!”
His dad shakes his head and moans. “God, this was an awful idea. What was I thinking? What am I doing?” he mumbles into his hands.
Noah sighs and stands up straight, trying to make himself taller. He can handle this, he’s a big boy. He thinks very hard about it for a moment; what would he do if Daddy was in trouble?
The answer hits him and Noah feels a little dumb for not thinking of it right away.
“Okay, I can fix it. I’ll be right back Daddy, stay here!” Noah says, reaching out to pat his dad on the back one last time.
With that, Noah skids across the room and out the door which he promptly slams shut behind himself. The hall is full of people wandering around, including his Lottie who looks very pretty in her purple dress.
“My Lottie!” Noah shouts, running towards her. Everyone else stops and watches him and smiles. Noah notices everyone’s been smiling at him a lot today, but he thinks it’s probably because he looks so nice. His Daddy let him pick out his very own bow tie to wear.
Lottie catches him before he can fall into her legs and laughs. “Noah, darling, what are you doing out here? The ceremony is about to start.”
“I need to find my Papa,” Noah says, putting his hands on his hips so she knows he’s serious. And then, worried that maybe she won’t understand, he says, “It’s a serious mission.”
Lottie smiles and moves her flowers to her other hand so she can reach for his hand. “Well, I happen to know exactly where he is,” she says. “Come on love, he’s just through here.”
Noah’s only been here once before, so he doesn’t know his way around that well. It’s a big giant house that Noah thinks is maybe a castle. Maybe princes used to live here, and maybe that’s why his Papa cried when they walked in for the first time and kissed his Daddy so hard.
They end up just down the hall from where his Daddy is getting dressed. Lottie knocks on the door and yells, “Harry, you have a visitor!”
Moments later, the door swings open to reveal Niall. “Little man!” he shouts.
Noah grins. “Hello, Niall,” he says, trying to be very serious. “I need my Papa right now, it’s an emergency.”
From the back of the room, Noah hears a chair scrape across the floor, and the next thing he knows, there’s his Papa.
Papa always seems a lot taller than everyone else, but Noah thinks it maybe that he’s just very small. Papa’s wearing his very nicest suit with a tie, shiny shoes, and a flower just like Noah. His hair is very extra curly today, and Noah thinks he looks very nice. Someday, Noah wants to be big and tall, like his Papa, so he can protect everyone and his Daddy too.
“Bean,” Papa says, looking worried. “Darling, what’s going on? What are you doing over here?”
Noah takes a deep breath and reaches out for Papa’s hand. “It’s an emergency!” he shouts, which makes Lottie jump beside him. “You gotta help me, Papa, hurry!”
With that, Noah holds on tight to Papa’s hand and starts running. His Papa makes a noise but still follows, not letting go of Noah’s hand until they get down the hall to his Daddy’s room.
“Noah, baby what’s going on?” His Papa asks once they’re standing at the door. “You’re scaring me.”
Noah pushes the door open and points to where Daddy is still sitting in his chair, slumped over and crying. “You need to fix my Daddy,” he says. “He needs to be calm so you can get married.”
It always makes Noah happy, watching the way Papa looks at his Daddy. His eyes always go all soft and he smiles, and it’s all very mushy and gross, but Noah likes it. He likes it because he knows it’s only cause his Daddies are very in love that they look like that at each other.
Papa shuts the door behind them and walks across the room in a few big steps. He gets down on his knees next to Noah’s dad and reaches out to rub his back.
“Oh, Lou,” he whispers. “Baby, what’s wrong?”
“You aren’t supposed to see me like this, it’s bad luck,” Daddy says, looking up finally.
He’s got tears all on his face and stuff, probably because he’s been crying a lot. Noah doesn’t know why he started crying, it just happened. His Zayn had to leave them and check to make sure everything was okay with Noah's new baby cousin before the wedding, and he told his Daddy not to have cold feet, and then Daddy started to cry.
Only, he’s not supposed to cry, Noah knows this. His Daddy is getting married today, which is very special, and he should only be happy. Something is definitely wrong with his Daddy-maybe his feet are cold, Noah doesn’t like it when he’s cold either, except it’s summer so no one should have cold feet-but he knows his Papa will be able to fix it. He fixes everything.
“I think we’ll be okay,” Papa laughs, reaching out to wipe tears away from Daddy’s cheeks. “Noah’s very worried about you, my love, what happened? Why are you crying?”
Noah knows his Papa does that a lot, calls his Daddy different names except Louis. He likes to call him my love and baby and sweetheart and a million trillion others. Daddy calls his Papa my love and pretty and darling a lot too. But his Daddy also calls him Harold and popstar when he's teasin’, like his Papa calls him Lewis. Noah didn't know people could have so many nice names for each other when they're in love. Sometimes it's hard to keep up.
“What are we doing?” Daddy whispers. “What am I doing, I messed this all up the first time round and now-”
“Hey, hey,” Papa whispers. “Look at me.”
Noah watches as his Daddy does. Sometimes his grandmas tell him that he’s very lucky because his Daddies love each other so much. Noah knows that they’re right, though, because his Daddies love each other the most out of everyone-except him, of course.
When his Daddy is worried, he always looks at Papa and his face gets nicer, and he remembers that Papa will always take care of them. Sometimes Noah thinks maybe his Daddy forgets that when he’s sad. Sometimes he thinks maybe his Daddy thinks they’re alone still, but they aren’t, and Papa promises they never will be again. They’re gonna be a family forever and ever now, and his Papa loves him and his Daddy a lot.
“I love you,” Papa whispers. “I love you, and I’m never leaving okay? You’re mine, baby, all mine always. You and Noah are all I want, I can’t wait to spend my life with you. You mean absolutely everything to me, Louis, baby, you’re everything.”
That seems to make his Daddy a lot calmer. He takes a few breaths and reaches out to put his hands on Papa’s cheeks. “I love you too,” he replies, as he always does. “I’m sorry, it’s just-I never thought this would happen. I never thought you’d want to keep me.”
Papa laughs softly. “Of course I want to keep you, where would I be without you?”
They lean their foreheads on each other and Noah watches from his place by the door. His Daddy seems to calm down after his Papa whispers to him a few times and rubs his hands on Daddy’s shoulders. They can’t kiss yet, Noah knows, but he thinks they want to.
“This is definitely bad luck,” Daddy whispers.
Papa laughs and shakes his head. “The only bad luck would be if both the grooms and your best man missed the wedding,” he says. “I have to go now, but you’ll be okay right?”
“I’ll be okay,” Daddy promises.
Papa nods. “I’ll be waiting for you,” he says as he stands up and turns around. He smiles at Noah, his big smile that Daddy says makes him look goofy, and hugs him tight. “I’ll be waiting for you too, bean. Take care of your Daddy for me, don’t let him run off.”
Noah giggles and kisses his Papa’s cheek. “I won’t, promise.”
Harry winks at him and leaves the room, calling out for Gemma who’s been yelling his name a lot since Noah took him. Noah looks over to where his Daddy is wiping at his cheeks and looking at himself in the mirror and walks over.
He has to get up on tiptoes, but Noah can soon see his face in the mirror right along with Daddy’s. Papa always says that Daddy is the very most beautiful person in the world, and Noah thinks so too, even when he’s been crying. Noah wants to be just like his Daddy when he grows up, strong, funny, and nice like him. Sometimes he thinks he looks like his Daddy a little bit with his eyes, and people tell him that, and it makes Noah very happy because there’s no one else in the world like his Daddy.
Daddy looks down at him and smiles.
“What do you think, baby?” he asks, putting his hand on top of Noah’s curls. “Good idea or bad idea?”
There are some things Noah doesn’t understand. He doesn’t understand why his other dad left him and his Daddy alone. He doesn’t understand why his Daddy used to stay up at night and cry when he thought Noah was sleeping. He doesn’t understand why Daddy gets scared sometimes that Papa would ever leave them. He doesn’t understand why his Daddy gets really sad for no reason.
But there are some things Noah is absolutely sure of. He is sure that dinosaurs are his favorite animals, next to penguins, that chocolates are his favorite candy, and that he and his Daddy are a team. He’s sure that Eva is his very best friend and Niall is the best at playing guitar. He’s sure that the sea is blue and green and gray, like Daddy’s eyes. He’s sure that even when it rains sometimes and makes him very sad, the sun always, always comes back.
Noah is sure that his Papa and Daddy love him more than anything in the world. He’s certain that his Daddies love each other more than he could ever know. He knows that his Papa would never leave Daddy sad someday, and he knows that his Daddy is always going to take care of them. No matter what happens, Noah knows that he’ll away have his Papa and Daddy forever, and he knows that he wants them to spend forever together-like Papa said.
So Noah meets his Daddy’s eyes in the mirror, which are blue like his and beautiful like the sea, his Papa told him once, and smiles his biggest smile.
“Good idea,” he says, absolutely sure of every word. His Daddy smiles big and wide when he hears it .and reaches out for his hand. Noah grins and nods his head one last time before saying, “The best idea you’ve ever had.”