Chapter Text
The war was over.
Itadori's knees hit the floor, the sound deafening in the sudden silence. It echoed and it reverberated in his head, his teeth rattling with the force of it. He could feel his body swaying. He wanted to scream. He could not feel his fingers, his toes, his hands.
The silence was overwhelming.
The world was tilting on its axis. He could not see, his eyes burning with the effort of keeping them open, with the tears and the blood, but his mind was not letting him rest. His mind was not letting him breathe.
His mind was screaming, a high-pitched ringing noise.
"Fushiguro." He said.
It felt like an echo, the name bouncing from wall to wall, and then the silence came back, the deafening, heart-wrenching silence.
He blinked, and the world was a little bit clearer. His vision was a mess of black, blue, and red, his head pounding with pain, his lungs constricting, his heart beating too fast. He could not understand the situation, the images coming to him through the fog of panic.
His throat was hurting.
He tried to breathe in, but his lungs were not working, his body frozen. His arms were shaking. His vision was clearing. He could see the sky now, the blue so dark it was almost black, the moon full, shining, beautiful.
There was blood, everywhere, staining his clothes, his skin, his hair. He could not make sense of it. He blinked again, his eyelids heavy, and his ears were still ringing. He could hear his own breathing, the way it was uneven, ragged, broken, and he could not hear anything else.
He had to close his eyes.
When he opened them, there was a body in front of him. The person was laying down on their back, and the image was so surreal he could not process it. The blood was spreading, like ink, dark and shiny, and he could not look away.
"Someone help him! He's going to die!"
His mouth was moving, but he could not hear his own voice. There was a weight on his shoulders, and the world tilted once again. The ground was cold.
He could not think.
There was blood on his hands.
He knew who the body belonged to.
He could not move, his whole body numb and frozen. There was a hand in his, the palm warm and sweaty, and the grip was tight, a reminder of something important.
"Don't worry, Fushiguro, I'm right here. You're gonna be okay."
He did not know what to do.
He did not want to close his eyes. The person was not answering him. Their breathing was weak, and he could not look away, not for a single second.
He was scared.
He had never been so scared in his entire life.
"You're okay, you're okay, you're okay." He was saying, the words a mantra, and his chest was so tight he could not breathe. His head was swimming. He had never felt this much pain, not even when his nails were torn off, his skin split open, his bones broken.
He was terrified.
"Please." He said. His voice was breaking. He could not remember the last time he had cried. "Please don't die."
He was sobbing, his throat dry, and his eyes were burning. He was shaking, his teeth chattering, and the grip on his hand tightened.
"Don't leave me alone." He whispered, his voice weak and pathetic, and he had never felt this small, this insignificant. He had never felt this lost, not even when his grandfather had died.
His vision was fading.
"Stay with me." He begged. He did not know what he was begging for.
The person did not answer.
The grip on his hand disappeared.
The darkness came, and he let himself drown in it.
-
The next day or so passed in a blur.
Yuuji had no idea what was happening around him. He was numb, the world around him a foggy, indistinct mess of sounds and lights and shadows. People were speaking, their voices loud and distorted, but he could not make out their words. They were touching him, grabbing his arms and pulling him up, their hands on his face and in his hair.
He did not know who they were.
He did not know where he was.
He did not care.
His head was empty.
They were speaking to him, their mouths moving and their eyes wide, but the only thing he could focus on was the blood, the red on his skin and on his clothes, and the way his hands were shaking.
As if his body had suddenly realized that the danger had passed, that the enemy was defeated, and it was now free to fall apart.
The people around him were moving fast, their faces twisted in fear and desperation. Yuuji could not follow their movements. His eyes were burning. He wanted to sleep.
He felt a hand on his shoulder.
"Yuuji." A voice said. The sound was sharp, loud, and clear, as if he had suddenly been dragged into a silent room. He turned his head, slowly, his movements sluggish, his body heavy.
It took him a few seconds to recognize the person in front of him. It was Okkotsu. His face was pale, his eyes bloodshot. His hair was a mess. His uniform was dirty and stained with blood.
"Itadori," Okkotsu said, and his voice was so quiet, so careful, Yuuji did not know how to react. "Can you hear me?"
He wanted to answer, but his tongue was numb, his throat dry. He was shaking. His hands were cold.
"Come on," Okkotsu said. He was not touching him anymore, but his face was still close, his dark eyes locked on his. "Come on, we need to get you to the infirmary."
"Why?" Yuuji asked. The word felt weird on his lips. He was not sure he had spoken it out loud.
Okkotsu frowned.
"You're injured." He said, as if the reason was obvious. "You're in shock."
Yuuji did not answer. His mind was empty. His body was numb.
"You need help, Yuuji." Okkotsu added.
"I'm fine." Yuuji said. His voice was hoarse.
"No, you're not." Okkotsu said, and Yuuji's vision was beginning to clear. He could see the concern in the other man's eyes. He could feel the tremor in his voice. "You're hurt, Yuuji. You need help."
Yuuji shook his head.
"Fushiguro is hurt." He said. The words were heavy, painful. They felt like acid in his throat. "I need to go to him."
Okkotsu looked at him. He seemed pained, his lips pressed in a thin line, his eyes full of sadness.
"We need to take care of you, first." He said. His voice was firm, his eyes hard.
"Fushiguro is-"
"Itadori." Okkotsu interrupted him. His tone was sharp, almost harsh. "Listen to me. You're hurt. You're bleeding. You're exhausted. You're not thinking clearly."
"But Fushiguro-"
"He's safe." Okkotsu interrupted again, his voice softer this time. "We're taking him to the infirmary. He's with Shoko. He's going to be fine."
Yuuji stared at him, his eyes wide, his mouth hanging open.
"You need to go, too." Okkotsu continued. He was not touching him anymore, but his gaze was warm. "You need to let them take care of you. We're all worried about you, Yuuji."
Yuuji's body was not responding to his commands. He could not move. His legs were shaking.
"You've done enough, Yuuji," Okkotsu added. His tone was soothing. "Now you need to rest. You've done enough."
Yuuji was not sure if the other boy was right. But he did not have the energy to argue. His eyes were burning.
"Okay." He said, his voice weak. He nodded.
Okkotsu sighed, his face relaxing.
"Thank you." He whispered.
The world was still spinning. Yuuji's stomach was turning.
"Take him to the infirmary," Okkotsu said, looking away.
Yuuji felt a pair of hands on his shoulders, pushing him forward, and his vision blurred. He was not sure if he was awake or dreaming. His eyes were closed, but his mind was racing, his thoughts swirling around his head, the memories flashing through his mind like a slideshow.
The sound of the battle was echoing in his ears, the screams and the shouts, the sounds of the explosions and the curses. He could hear his own breathing, the sound ragged and harsh, his heartbeat hammering in his chest, and he was not sure if the feeling of pain in his lungs was real or imagined.
The hands on his shoulders were gripping him tighter, and he felt himself being lifted from the ground. He could feel the cool wind on his skin, the fresh air in his lungs, and the smell of blood and dirt and sweat. He was floating, his body limp and heavy, and he was not sure if the pain he was feeling was real or just a memory.
His mind was blank.
He did not remember how he got to the infirmary.
He did not remember how he ended up in one of the beds.
His body was exhausted.
He could feel his consciousness slipping away.
His mind was a mess of images, the scenes replaying in his head over and over, and the feeling of despair was overwhelming, suffocating.
He was falling into the darkness, his mind finally quieting down, his body sinking into the numbness.
---
When Yuuji opened his eyes, he did not know where he was.
For a moment, he was not sure if he was awake or dreaming. But the world was not spinning anymore, and his head was no longer pounding with pain. He could hear his heartbeat, and his body was not shaking.
He was laying down in a bed, the sheets soft and cool, the air crisp and fresh. The room was dimly lit, the curtains drawn shut, and there was a gentle breeze coming from the open window.
He blinked, and the realization slowly hit him.
The war was over.
"Hey."
Yuuji turned his head. His body was still weak, but his mind was clear.
Shoko was sitting next to his bed, her legs crossed, her eyes tired and bloodshot. She was holding a cup of coffee in her hand, and her hair was messy and tangled.
"Hi." Yuuji whispered.
"How are you feeling?" She asked.
Yuuji did not know how to answer.
"I'm okay." He said, after a few seconds.
She smiled. It was a small smile, and her lips were trembling, but her eyes were kind.
"That's good." She said.
Yuuji nodded. His throat was dry.
"What happened?" He asked.
"You passed out." She said. "You were exhausted. Your body and your mind couldn't take it anymore. You were in shock. You needed to rest."
Yuuji blinked. He could not remember any of it.
"Fushiguro." He said. "How's he doing? Is he okay?"
Shoko's face changed, her smile disappearing.
"He's alive, but... he's not well." She said, her voice low and quiet. "His wounds are healed, but he hasn't woken up yet."
Yuuji could not breathe. His heart was beating too fast.
"I don't think it's a physical problem." She continued. "His soul is damaged. We're not sure how much. His body is trying to heal itself, but... his spirit is too weak."
"What does that mean?" Yuuji whispered.
Shoko looked away.
"We're not sure." She said. "But we're going to try our best."
Yuuji felt the tears pricking his eyes. He was not sure how to process the information.
"Can I see him?" He asked.
Shoko nodded.
"I'll take you to him." She said.
She stood up, her movements slow and stiff. Her face was pale.
"Can you walk?" She asked.
Yuuji moved his arm, flexing his fingers.
"I think so." He said.
She smiled and held out her hand.
"Let's go then."
Yuuji took her hand, and she pulled him up. His body was heavy, his legs shaky, but he could stand on his own.
"Are you sure you're okay?" She asked, her brow furrowed.
Yuuji nodded.
"I'm fine." He said. "I just need some water."
She smiled.
"Let's get you some water, then." She said.
They walked out of the room, and into the hallway. The floor was cold under his bare feet, and the air was warm and humid. He could hear voices, the sounds muffled and distant. He was not sure if he was hearing the others talking, or if it was just his imagination.
They walked down the hallway, their footsteps echoing in the empty corridor.
Yuuji's mind was spinning, his thoughts swirling around his head, his memories flashing through his brain.
They reached a door, and Shoko stopped.
"This is it." She said. "Are you ready?"
Yuuji took a deep breath.
"Yes." He said.
She opened the door, and they stepped inside.
The room was bright and spacious. The walls were white, and the windows were open, letting in the sunlight. The curtains were drawn shut, the air warm and clean.
There were two beds in the room, one on each side.
Megumi was lying on the one on the right.
He was lying on his back, his body still and motionless, his eyes closed. His face was pale, his cheeks hollow, his lips chapped and dry. His hair was messy, his skin was covered in bandages and bruises.
Yuuji's breath caught in his throat.
"Go to him," Shoko said. "He'll know you're here."
Yuuji took a step forward, his legs shaky and weak. He could not take his eyes off Megumi.
"Is he..." Yuuji started, his voice hoarse and broken.
"He's not dead," Shoko said, her tone gentle. "His vitals are good. His wounds are healed. His body is fine."
"But his soul is hurt." Yuuji finished.
Shoko nodded.
"Yes." She said.
Yuuji swallowed the lump in his throat.
"What do we do?" He asked.
"We wait," Shoko said. "And we hope."
Yuuji's vision blurred.
"Okay." He whispered.
Shoko gave him a small smile and patted him on the back.
"I'll give you two some privacy." She said. "Call for me if you need anything."
Yuuji nodded, not taking his eyes off Megumi.
"Okay."
Shoko walked out of the room, closing the door behind her.
Yuuji sat down on the edge of the bed, his body stiff and sore. He did not know what to do. He did not know what to say.
"Fushiguro." He said. His voice was quiet, his tone hesitant. "It's me. It's Yuuji."
He didn't expect a response. He wasn't sure if Megumi could even hear him.
"I'm sorry." He whispered. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you."
He could feel the tears welling up in his eyes. He blinked them away, his chest tight, his throat dry.
"We won, Fushiguro." He said. "But why does it feel like we lost?"
The tears were flowing freely now, his body shaking, his hands trembling.
"I'm sorry, Fushiguro." He cried. "I'm so sorry."
He was not sure if he was apologizing for letting Megumi get hurt, or for the fact that he did not know how to bring him back.
He was not sure if he was apologizing to Megumi, or to himself.
He was not sure of anything, except the pain in his chest.
He stayed by Megumi's side, his body limp and heavy, his vision blurry, his mind empty. He was not sure how long he had been there, his eyes glued to the other boy's face, his thoughts swirling around his head.
The door opened, and Yuuji turned his head. Maki was standing in the doorway, her face pale, her eyes bloodshot.
"How is he?" She asked, her voice low and quiet.
"He's alive," Yuuji said. His own voice was raw and hoarse. "But he's not waking up."
Maki nodded, her lips pressed into a thin line. Itadori noticed the way her hand was trembling.
"How are you, Maki-senpai? Are you okay?"
She looked at him, her eyes wide, her mouth hanging open.
"Don't ask me that." She said. Her tone was sharp.
Yuuji frowned.
"I'm sorry." He said. "I just want to make sure you're-"
"Don't ask me that, Itadori." She interrupted.
"Maki-senpai," Yuuji whispered. He was not sure how to comfort her. He was not sure if she wanted to be comforted.
She turned away, her jaw clenched, her eyes closed.
"He's going to be okay," Maki said. "Fushiguro is a fighter."
"I know," Yuuji whispered.
She opened her eyes, and looked at him, her expression hard and unreadable.
"Take care of him, Itadori." She said. "Don't let him go."
Yuuji nodded.
"I will."
Maki took a deep breath and walked away.
Yuuji could not stop the tears from falling.
He stayed by Megumi's side for hours, his body tired and sore, his mind a mess of emotions. He was not sure how long he had been there, his thoughts scattered, his eyes fixed on Megumi's face.
He was not sure when he fell asleep.
-
He spent the next couple of days by Megumi's side.
The others came and went, their faces tired and pale, their eyes filled with sadness and fear. At first, they tried to convince him to leave, but Yuuji refused. He did not want to be anywhere else. He did not want to leave Megumi.
After a while, the others gave up and stopped bothering him. They let him be, and he was grateful for that.
Besides the occasional shower and change of clothes, he did not move. He barely slept. His mind was blank, his thoughts numb. He was not sure if the exhaustion he was feeling was physical or mental. All he knew was that he could not leave.
He spent his time talking to Megumi.
He told him about the others, the state of the school, the status of the students and the curses. He talked about his own feelings, his guilt and pain, his sadness and his hope.
He talked until his voice was hoarse and his throat was dry.
"You know, Fushiguro, I wish we'd had more time together," Yuuji said, his voice weak and raspy. "The three of us, with Kugisaki. I wish we'd had more time to hang out and talk and laugh."
He took a deep breath, the air stale and heavy in his lungs.
"I wish we could have gone out for food and movies and stupid things. I wish we could have been normal."
He blinked the tears away, his vision blurry.
"But I'm glad I got to know you," Yuuji continued. "I'm glad we got to be friends. I'm glad you were there for me. You're a good person, Fushiguro. A good friend."
He let out a shaky breath, his chest tight, his eyes burning.
"So you need to come back, Fushiguro," Yuuji whispered. "You need to wake up. I can't do this without you. We need you. I need you.
-
"Itadori, you need to eat something."
Yuuji turned his head, his eyes bleary and unfocused. He could not remember when was the last time he had eaten anything.
Shoko was standing by the door, her face drawn, her eyes dark.
"I'm fine," Yuuji mumbled.
"You're not," She said. "Your body needs food. You're dehydrated and exhausted."
Yuuji sighed.
"I'll eat later." He said.
"No, you'll eat now," She said. "Come on, I brought you some food."
She held up a tray of food, her expression stern.
"Thank you," Yuuji whispered, taking the tray.
"You're welcome." She said.
She turned to leave when Yuuji called after her.
"Ieiri-san, when was the last time you slept?"
She stopped her body tense.
"A few days ago." She said. "Why?"
"You look tired," Yuuji said. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"I'm fine." She said.
Yuuji nodded.
"Okay," He said.
She walked away, her footsteps light and quick.
Yuuji turned his attention back to Megumi. His face was pale and gaunt, his cheeks hollow, his lips chapped and dry.
"I think I'm going crazy," Yuuji mumbled.
Megumi did not respond.
"I keep expecting them to walk in. Kugisaki, and Nanamin, and Gojo-sensei." Yuuji said. "I keep thinking they're going to walk in, and everything will be okay again."
Yuuji blinked the tears away, his throat constricting.
"But they're not coming back," He whispered. "They're never coming back."
Yuuji bit his lip, his chest aching.
"Now that there isn't a war to fight, I'm not sure what to do," He said. "I'm not sure how to go on without them."
His hands were trembling, his eyes burning.
"I'm not sure how to go on without you," He whispered.
-
"You're not getting out of this one, Itadori. You need a break. A long, hot shower and a full night's sleep."
"Maki-senpai," Itadori croaked.
"Look, we've got things under control here. I'll watch over Fushiguro while you get some rest, okay?"
"But-"
"No buts, Itadori. You're exhausted. You're no good to him like this. Come on, we'll swap out."
"Fine."
Yuuji dragged himself to the shower, the water burning his skin. He stood under the stream, his eyes closed, his muscles tense. He could feel the exhaustion seeping into his bones.
He stood in the shower for a long time, his mind numb, his thoughts drifting.
After a while, he turned off the water and stepped out of the shower. He dried himself off and got dressed. He was not sure what to do now.
He walked back to the room, his feet heavy and his mind sluggish.
"You're looking better."
"Thanks, Maki-senpai."
"Go get some rest. We'll keep an eye on him."
"Alright. I'll see you later."
-
Yuuji was not sure how long he had been sleeping. The room was dark, the curtains drawn shut.
He sat up, his body stiff, his mind fuzzy.
"You're awake."
Yuuji jumped.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."
Okkotsu was sitting in a chair next to his bed, his face half hidden in shadows.
"What time is it?" Yuuji mumbled, his voice hoarse.
"It's late," Okkotsu said. "Or early, depending on how you look at it."
Yuuji blinked, his eyes adjusting to the darkness.
"Is something wrong?" He asked.
"No," Okkotsu said. "It's just that you've been asleep for nearly a whole day. And the others are worried."
Yuuji rubbed his eyes, his brain slowly coming back online.
"Oh," He said.
"You needed the rest," Okkotsu said. His voice was gentle. "We're all exhausted."
"Yeah," Yuuji mumbled.
He sat up, his mind groggy, his body stiff.
"How's Fushiguro?" He asked.
"He's the same," Okkotsu said. "Unresponsive."
"Has anything happened?"
"No."
"Oh."
"It's only been a few days, Itadori," Okkotsu said. "Give him some time."
"I know," Yuuji said. "It's just that-"
"He's strong," Okkotsu interrupted. "He'll make it."
"Yeah," Yuuji whispered.
There was a long silence.
"Okkotsu-senpai, do you think we will ever be normal again?" Yuuji asked.
"No," Okkotsu answered, his voice quiet. "But we can try."
Yuuji closed his eyes, his throat constricting.
"Yeah," He whispered.
-
It had been almost a week since the battle. The school was slowly beginning to rebuild, the students recovering from their wounds, both physical and emotional. Yuuji had spent most of his time at Megumi's bedside, only leaving when Shoko or the others forced him to.
"It's been almost a week," He said. "Isn't there something we can do?"
"No," Shoko answered. Her tone was gentle, but firm. "We need to give him time. His soul is injured. There's no way to rush the healing process."
Yuuji took a deep breath, his chest tight.
"I'm scared," He whispered.
Shoko put her hand on his shoulder.
"Itadori," She said. "Look at me."
Yuuji looked up.
"I'm not going to lie to you," She said. "This is dangerous. Megumi is in a very fragile state. We have no idea how much damage his soul has sustained. Even if he wakes up, there's no telling how much of him is left."
Yuuji felt his heart drop.
"Do you understand?" She asked.
"Yes," He whispered.
"Then you have to be prepared for the worst," She said. "And you have to be prepared for the best."
"What do I do?" He asked.
"Be there for him," She said. "Just like you've been doing. Talk to him, touch him. Let him know you're here."
Yuuji swallowed, his throat dry.
"Okay," He said.
She smiled at him, her expression gentle and kind.
"You're doing great, Itadori," She said.
-
"Do you know what's the hardest part, Fushiguro? It's seeing everyone pretending that they're okay."
Yuuji's voice was quiet, his tone subdued.
"I can see it in their faces. They're putting on a brave front, trying to hide their pain and their fears. They try to be there for each other, but they're just as lost and scared as I am."
He paused, his eyes fixed on Megumi's still form.
"I heard Shoko sob the other day when she left the room," Yuuji continued. "It was quiet, but I heard it. She is expected to take care of all of the wounded, but she just lost a close friend too. She's devastated."
Yuuji ran his fingers through his hair, his hand shaking.
"She's not the only one," He said. "Inumaki is barely speaking, and I don't think I've ever seen Okkotsu smile."
His voice was hoarse, his throat raw.
"I've never seen Panda cry before," He whispered.
He let out a shaky breath, his chest heavy.
"Everyone is so broken, and I'm not sure how to fix it."
Yuuji paused, his vision blurred with tears.
"How can I help them, when I'm so broken myself?"
-
The day he felt Megumi's hand twitch, Yuuji was certain he was hallucinating.
He was exhausted, his mind foggy, his body aching. He had barely eaten or slept in days, his attention solely focused on Megumi.
He blinked, his eyes unfocused. He was not sure if what he was seeing was real.
"Fushiguro," He whispered.
"Nn," Megumi groaned.
"Fushiguro!" Yuuji exclaimed, his voice loud and desperate. "Shoko! Shoko, come quick!"
She ran into the room, her face pale.
"What is it? Is he awake?" She asked.
"He's moving, look!" Yuuji said.
She rushed to the bedside, her eyes wide.
"Megumi," She said. "Can you hear me?"
He did not respond, his breathing labored, his eyes still closed.
"He moved his hand," Yuuji said.
"His pulse is getting stronger," She said, her voice hopeful. "I think he's coming out of it."
Yuuji could not stop the tears from falling.
"You did it, Fushiguro," Yuuji choked out, his voice cracking. "You're coming back."
-
Despite Shoko's warnings, Yuuji was hopeful.
"He's awake," Yuuji told Maki.
"Really?"
"Well, he's not exactly awake," Yuuji said. "He opened his eyes once, but then he went back to sleep. But he's responding to stimuli now. Shoko said that's a good sign."
"That's great," Maki said. "How are you holding up?"
"I'm fine," Yuuji said. "Why?"
"Itadori," Maki sighed. "You look like hell."
"I'm fine," Yuuji insisted.
"Look, I know you're worried about Fushiguro," She said. "We all are. But you can't neglect your own health. You need to take care of yourself too."
"I'm taking care of myself," Yuuji protested.
"No, you're not," She said.
"Fine," Yuuji relented. "But I can't leave him. He might hear me, or open his eyes again."
"Okay," She said. "We'll bring you food and clothes."
"Thank you," Yuuji said.
-
It was not until two days later that Megumi woke up.
Yuuji was dozing, his head resting on his arms. He heard a small noise, and his eyes snapped open.
Megumi was staring at him, his eyes wide, his expression confused.
"Fushiguro!" Yuuji gasped.
He reached out to touch Megumi's face, his hand trembling.
"You're awake," He said.
Megumi did not respond.
"Do you know where you are?" Yuuji asked.
Megumi did not move.
"You're in the infirmary," Yuuji explained. "You've been asleep for a long time."
He leaned closer, his heart racing.
"Do you know who I am?"
Megumi stared at him, his eyes blank.
"Do you remember anything?"
Megumi did not speak.
Yuuji's chest tightened.
"I'll get Shoko," He whispered.
-
"It's not unusual for patients to have memory loss," Shoko explained. "Especially those who have experienced severe trauma."
"So you're saying he doesn't remember me?" Yuuji asked.
"It's possible," She said. "But it's also possible that he just needs some time to process everything."
Yuuji bit his lip, his heart heavy. He did not know how to feel. On one hand, he was relieved that Megumi was awake and responsive. On the other hand, he was scared. Scared that Megumi would never remember him. Scared that he would never be the same.
"It's okay," He said. "We'll just have to remind him."
-
"Good morning, Fushiguro," Yuuji called into the room. "How are you feeling today?"
He walked over to the bed and sat down next to Megumi.
"Did you sleep well?" He asked.
Megumi did not respond. He had not said a word since he woke up.
"Shoko said your injuries are healing well," Yuuji continued. "She says you're getting stronger every day."
Megumi's expression did not change.
"It's a nice day out," Yuuji said. "Maybe I can take you outside for a bit later if you're feeling up to it."
Megumi blinked, his eyes dull.
"I'm sorry, Fushiguro," Yuuji whispered. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you."
Megumi's eyes widened, and it was the first time he had shown any sort of emotion. Yuuji felt his heart skip a beat.
"You must have been so scared," Yuuji choked out.
He reached out to touch Megumi's hand. The dark-haired boy flinched and pulled away.
"I'm sorry," Yuuji repeated. "I'm so sorry."
-
During the next couple of days, there were small improvements. Megumi was able to sit up, and he ate on his own. But he was still silent, and he refused to let anyone touch him.
If they had let him, Yuuji would not have left his side. But Shoko made him go back to his own dormitory at night. She was afraid he would exhaust himself. But when he was alone in his own room, Yuuji felt restless. He could not sleep, and his thoughts were plagued with images of the battle. He kept thinking about Kugisaki, and Gojo, and Nanami, and all the others who were lost. He could not shake the guilt and the grief that consumed him.
Yuuji was not sure if he would ever be able to move on.
-
When Yuuji visited Megumi the next day, he was surprised to find Okkotsu sitting next to the bed.
"Itadori," Okkotsu greeted.
"Hey," Yuuji replied. "What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to see how he was doing," Okkotsu said.
"Oh," Yuuji said.
He had not seen Okkotsu much lately. The older boy had been busy helping with the reconstruction of the school, and he had been spending most of his free time with Inumaki.
"I'm not bothering you, am I?" Okkotsu asked.
"No," Yuuji said. "I'm glad you're here. I think Fushiguro needs more friends right now."
"I hope I'm not overstepping," Okkotsu said. "He's very quiet."
"He hasn't spoken since he woke up," Yuuji explained.
"I see," Okkotsu murmured.
There was a long pause.
"Itadori, how are you holding up?" Okkotsu asked.
"What do you mean?" Yuuji said.
"I can't even imagine what you've been through," Okkotsu said.
"It wasn't just me," Yuuji mumbled. "You lost a lot of friends too."
"Yeah," Okkotsu said, his voice heavy.
Yuuji did not know what to say. He felt the guilt and grief gnawing at his insides.
"Itadori, we all miss them," Okkotsu said.
The two sat in silence. Yuuji did not want to talk about it. He could not talk about it. Only to Fushiguro, and the dark-haired boy was in no condition to listen.
"How is Inumaki-senpai doing?" Yuuji asked, changing the subject.
"He's okay," Okkotsu said. "He doesn't talk about it. But I know he's hurting."
"I'm glad you're here," Yuuji said. "You've always been a good friend to him."
"Yeah," Okkotsu smiled sadly.
"Itadori, I've been meaning to ask," Okkotsu continued. "Are you and Fushiguro..."
"What?" Yuuji asked.
"Never mind," Okkotsu said. "Forget I asked."
"No, what is it?" Yuuji asked.
"Are you and Fushiguro together?" Okkotsu blurted out.
Yuuji was stunned. He had not expected the question.
"Why do you ask?" Yuuji asked.
"It's just that I've seen the way you are with him," Okkotsu said. "The way you care for him."
"He's my best friend," Yuuji said. "The only one I have left."
"Oh," Okkotsu said, his voice low. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry."
"It's okay," Yuuji said. "It's just...complicated."
"I'm sorry," Okkotsu said again.
"Don't worry about it," Yuuji said. "Thanks for being there for Fushiguro."
"Yeah," Okkotsu said. "I'll let you two have some time alone."
Yuuji watched as the older boy left the room. He turned to look at Megumi, the dark-haired boy staring off into space.
"Fushiguro," Yuuji whispered. "What are we going to do?"
-
The first time Megumi spoke, Yuuji was not expecting it.
It had been almost two weeks since the battle, and Megumi had barely responded to anyone. He ate his meals and slept, but he was otherwise silent. Yuuji was growing worried, and he had been trying to spend more time with the dark-haired boy, hoping that he would eventually break his silence.
"Fushiguro," Yuuji called out, his tone light. "Are you hungry? It's lunchtime."
Megumi did not move, but Yuuji could tell by the look in his eyes that he was listening.
"I cooked you meatballs," Yuuji said. "You know, the ones I taught you how to make?"
Megumi's eyes seemed to widen, but he still did not speak.
"You liked them, didn't you?" Yuuji continued. "I even doubled the ginger like you like it."
"Yuuji."
The word was barely a whisper, but Yuuji heard it. His eyes widened, his heart skipping a beat. Megumi's voice was hoarse and quiet, but it was the most beautiful thing he had ever heard.
"Fushiguro, do you know who I am?"
"Yuuji," Megumi repeated.
"Yes," Yuuji breathed. "That's my name. Do you remember me?"
Fushiguro's eyes were dark, his expression blank. But there was something else there. Something deep and haunted. Slowly, he nodded his head.
"Oh, thank god," Yuuji choked out.
He could not stop the tears from falling. Megumi stared at him, his gaze unreadable.
"Fushiguro, I'm so sorry," Yuuji sobbed. "I couldn't protect you. I tried, but I failed."
Megumi did not respond.
"Fushiguro, please," Yuuji begged. "Say something."
But Megumi remained silent.
Yuuji was not sure if the dark-haired boy remembered what happened. He was not sure if Megumi could understand the words he was saying. But at least he had finally spoken. At least he knew that there was a part of the dark-haired boy that recognized him. That remembered. He would take whatever he could get.
"I'm going to get you out of this," Yuuji swore. "I promise."
Megumi stared at him, and Yuuji could swear there was a glimmer of recognition in those dark eyes.
-
Yuuji was determined to get Megumi to speak again. He brought him books and games and anything else he could think of that might interest the dark-haired boy.
"Here," Yuuji said, placing a pile of books on the bedside table. "These are from the library. I thought you might like them."
Megumi did not respond.
"They're mostly nonfiction," Yuuji continued. "I know you like reading about animals and nature. Oh, there's a few novels too. I don't know if you read much fiction, but I thought maybe you could use a break from the world. I guess we can't exactly leave the school right now."
Megumi was silent.
"Oh, this one looks interesting," Yuuji said, picking up a book. "It's a memoir by a doctor. She traveled the world treating people who lived in remote places. Apparently, she learned a lot about different cultures and medicines. I don't know, maybe you'd like it."
There was a hint of a smile on Megumi's face. Yuuji felt his heart soar.
"Do you want to try reading it?" Yuuji asked.
Megumi shook his head.
"That's okay," Yuuji said, trying to hide his disappointment. "Maybe I can read it to you? Would that be okay?"
Megumi looked at him for a moment. Then he nodded.
"Okay," Yuuji smiled. "Let's start at the beginning."
He opened the book and began to read.
-
Yuuji had never been good at reading. He stumbled over the words and frequently had to stop to look up definitions. But he did his best, and Megumi seemed to be enjoying it. The dark-haired boy had a peaceful look on his face, and he seemed to relax as Yuuji read.
"And so, they found a way to heal the sick and injured without the use of modern medicine," Yuuji finished. "Isn't that amazing?"
Megumi's expression was thoughtful, and he nodded his head slowly.
"We could really learn a lot from people like that," Yuuji mused. "If only the world wasn't so focused on curses."
He put the book down and looked at Megumi.
"Hey," He said. "How are you feeling?"
Megumi's eyes were dark, and his expression was unreadable. But he reached out and touched Yuuji's hand. The dark-haired boy's fingers were cold and clammy, but Yuuji did not pull away.
"Thank you," Megumi whispered.
His voice was soft and raspy, but the words were clear. Yuuji felt a wave of relief wash over him.
"Of course," Yuuji said. "I'm always here for you, Fushiguro."
Megumi did not respond, but the corner of his mouth turned up.
-
Shoko finally allowed Yuuji to take Megumi outside. It was a cool spring day, and the sun was shining. They walked slowly through the courtyard, Yuuji's arm around Megumi's waist, supporting the dark-haired boy as he shuffled along.
"It's so nice out," Yuuji said. "It feels like summer is just around the corner."
Megumi did not reply, but he seemed to enjoy the fresh air.
"I used to run laps around this courtyard every day," Yuuji continued. "It was a good way to burn off energy. And Kugisaki used to yell at me whenever I passed her."
He could not help but smile at the memory.
"She was a good friend," He said. "Even though she could be mean sometimes."
Megumi stopped walking and looked up at the sky. His expression was unreadable. Yuuji watched him, the dark-haired boy's gaze distant.
"Hey," Yuuji said, touching Megumi's arm. "Are you okay?"
Megumi turned to look at him, and Yuuji was surprised to see tears in the dark-haired boy's eyes.
"Fushiguro?"
Megumi blinked, the tears rolling down his cheeks.
"Fushiguro," Yuuji repeated, his voice soft.
He pulled the dark-haired boy into a hug, gently wrapping his arms around him. Megumi was stiff, but he did not pull away.
"I know," Yuuji whispered. "I miss her too."
Megumi shuddered, and Yuuji felt his shoulders begin to shake.
"It's okay," Yuuji murmured. "Let it out."
Megumi cried silently, his body trembling. Yuuji held him close, his heart aching. There were so many things he wanted to say. So many emotions he wanted to share. But he could not find the words. All he could do was hold the dark-haired boy as he fell apart.
"We'll get through this," Yuuji said. "I promise."
Megumi leaned into his embrace, and Yuuji could feel his heartbeat pounding against his own chest. He tightened his grip, pulling the boy closer. They stood there in the courtyard, the warm breeze blowing around them, the sunlight casting a golden glow over everything. Yuuji closed his eyes, his chin resting on Megumi's head, the dark-haired boy's body fitting perfectly against his own. He could stay like this forever, he thought. If only he could keep the dark-haired boy safe in his arms.
-
That night, Yuuji stayed with Megumi. He had helped the dark-haired boy get ready for bed, and now they were sitting on the bed, Megumi leaning against Yuuji's shoulder. Yuuji gently ran his fingers through the dark-haired boy's hair, and he could feel Megumi relax under his touch.
His heart was full, and he could not remember the last time he had felt so happy. Megumi accepted his touch, and that meant everything to him.
"Do you want me to read to you again?" Yuuji asked.
"No," Megumi replied, his voice soft.
Yuuji was surprised. He had not expected him to speak.
"You're doing so well," Yuuji said. "We'll be back in our dorm soon."
"Yuuji."
The word was a whisper, but Yuuji heard it.
"Yeah?"
"Stay."
"Of course," Yuuji murmured.
He leaned back against the pillows, gently pulling Megumi with him. The dark-haired boy settled into his arms, his head resting against Yuuji's chest.
His heart was racing, and he was sure that Megumi could feel it. But the dark-haired boy did not seem to mind. He relaxed into Yuuji's embrace, his breathing slowing down.
"Is this okay?" Yuuji asked.
"Mm," Megumi hummed, his eyes closed.
Yuuji felt like his heart was going to explode. He had dreamed about moments like this, and now that it was happening, he did not know how to react. Megumi's body was warm against his own, and he could smell the dark-haired boy's familiar scent.
"Goodnight, Fushiguro."
Megumi did not answer, his body relaxing as sleep took over.
Yuuji could not stop smiling.
-
The next morning, Yuuji awoke to the feeling of someone watching him. He blinked his eyes open and saw Maki staring at him from the doorway.
"You're getting a little too comfortable, don't you think?" She asked, raising her eyebrows.
Yuuji could not help but notice the slight smile on her face. He couldn't care about what she had to say, not when Megumi was in his arms, looking more peaceful than he had since waking up.
"No," Yuuji said.
Maki's eyes softened, and she smiled. It was the first real smile Yuuji had seen on her since the battle.
"I'm glad," She said.
Yuuji did not respond, his gaze returning to Megumi's sleeping form. The dark-haired boy's breath was slow and even, his eyelashes fluttering against his pale cheeks. Yuuji's heart swelled with love.
"I'll let you two have some privacy," Maki said, turning to leave.
Yuuji barely heard her. His world had narrowed to the boy in his arms.
"Megumi," Yuuji breathed, his voice full of wonder.
Megumi stirred, his eyes blinking open. He looked up at Yuuji, his gaze clear and steady.
"Yuuji."
The word was soft and quiet, but it was the sweetest thing Yuuji had ever heard.
"Yes," Yuuji smiled. "It's me."
"You stayed."
"I'll always stay," Yuuji promised. "As long as you want me."
Megumi did not reply, but the look in his eyes told Yuuji everything he needed to know.
"Let's get you breakfast," Yuuji said.
He gently helped Megumi sit up, supporting the dark-haired boy as he swung his legs over the side of the bed.
"We can eat outside," Yuuji continued. "The weather is supposed to be nice."
Megumi did not speak, but he followed Yuuji willingly, allowing the pink-haired boy to guide him.
"What do you feel like eating?" Yuuji asked. "Something light, or do you have a big appetite today?"
Megumi shrugged.
"Let's go with something light," Yuuji decided. "Some fruit and toast. And maybe a cup of tea."
Megumi did not argue.
-
They spent the day in the courtyard, soaking up the sunshine. Megumi did not speak, but that did not matter. Yuuji was content to just be near him.
"Fushiguro," Yuuji said. "Are you comfortable?"
Megumi's head was resting in Yuuji's lap, and the pink-haired boy was gently combing his fingers through the dark-haired boy's hair.
"Mm."
"Good," Yuuji smiled.
Megumi's eyes were closed, and his expression was peaceful. He was so beautiful, Yuuji thought. Even though he was still pale and thin, the dark-haired boy's features were delicate and graceful.
"Fushiguro," Yuuji murmured, his gaze softening.
He knew that the dark-haired boy would never admit it, but he loved being cared for. He needed it, and Yuuji was happy to give it.
"Megumi."
The dark-haired boy's eyes opened, his gaze questioning.
"I just wanted to say your name," Yuuji explained. "You don't mind, right?"
Megumi's eyes searched Yuuji's face. The pink-haired boy felt a wave of emotions rush over him. He was scared and vulnerable, and he could not hide it.
"Yuuji," Megumi said.
His voice was quiet, but the word was clear.
"I love you," Yuuji blurted out.
Megumi's eyes widened, and Yuuji immediately regretted the words. He had not meant to say them out loud.
"Sorry," Yuuji mumbled, looking away.
Megumi was silent, and Yuuji was afraid to look at him. The pink-haired boy took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart.
He wasn't supposed to feel this way. They had never talked about it. But it was too late now. The words were out there, hanging between them like an invisible thread. He knew Megumi felt it, too. The dark-haired boy's breathing had changed, and he could sense the tension in the other boy's body.
When he finally gathered the courage to look at Megumi, he was surprised to see tears in the dark-haired boy's eyes.
"Megumi," Yuuji whispered. "It's okay. You don't have to say anything."
"No," Megumi choked out. "You don't understand."
"What don't I understand?"
Megumi was silent for a moment, his gaze far away. Then he looked up at Yuuji, his dark eyes full of emotion.
"I'm broken," Megumi said. "You should leave."
Yuuji's heart broke.
"No," Yuuji shook his head. "You're not broken. You're just hurting. And I'll be here for you, no matter what."
Megumi's face crumpled, and the tears began to fall.
"Megumi," Yuuji whispered, his voice breaking.
He reached out and pulled the dark-haired boy into his arms, holding him close.
"I'm sorry," Megumi sobbed, his body trembling.
"It's okay," Yuuji murmured. "I'm here. I'll always be here."
"You don't understand," Megumi repeated. "I'm not the same person anymore. I'll never be the same."
"You don't have to be," Yuuji said. "Just be yourself. That's all I need."
"You're wrong," Megumi whispered. "I'm not worth it."
"You are," Yuuji insisted. "You're worth everything to me."
Megumi cried harder, and Yuuji held him tight, his heart breaking. He would do anything to take away the pain, to heal the dark-haired boy's shattered soul. He had been there himself, and he knew the road ahead would not be easy. But he would be there every step of the way. He would be there until the end, and even after that.
"I'm here," Yuuji whispered. "I'm here."
"I don't deserve it," Megumi cried. "I don't deserve you."
"It's not about deserving," Yuuji said. "It's about being there for each other. And I'll always be there for you."
"You're so good," Megumi whispered. "Why are you so good?"
"I'm not," Yuuji replied. "I've done terrible things. But I'm trying to make up for it. I'm trying to be a better person."
Megumi's sobs slowed, and his body relaxed in Yuuji's arms. Yuuji held him, his heart full of love and sorrow. He did not know if the dark-haired boy would ever recover, but he was determined to be there for him, no matter what.
"It's okay," Yuuji said. "We're gonna get through this. Together."
Megumi nodded, his head resting against Yuuji's chest.
They stayed like that for a while, neither of them speaking. The silence was not uncomfortable. They were just taking a moment to breathe, to be in each other's presence.
"Yuuji," Megumi finally spoke.
"Yeah?"
"I love you too."
-
Megumi's recovery was slow.
There were days when he could not get out of bed and days when he could barely talk. But on his good days, Yuuji would take him outside and they would spend hours sitting together in the courtyard. He was always careful not to push the dark-haired boy too hard. He would listen patiently to everything Megumi had to say, and he would tell the dark-haired boy how proud he was of him.
On the bad days, Megumi would cry. Yuuji would hold him, whispering comforting words until the tears stopped. And then they would just be together, enjoying the quiet.
One afternoon, Yuuji was reading in the courtyard when Megumi appeared.
"Megumi," He smiled, closing his book.
Megumi did not smile back, but his expression was soft. He sat down next to Yuuji, their shoulders touching.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Yuuji asked.
"Not really," Megumi replied.
"That's okay," Yuuji said. "We can just sit here."
They sat in silence for a while, the sun warm on their faces. Megumi leaned against Yuuji's shoulder, his eyes closed. Yuuji rested his head against his, enjoying the closeness.
"Do you want me to read to you?" Yuuji asked.
"Yes," Megumi murmured.
Yuuji picked up his book, opening it to the page where he had left off. He began to read, his voice soft and steady. Megumi listened, his eyes still closed.
"Is it boring?" Yuuji asked.
Megumi did not answer. He just leaned closer, his head resting on Yuuji's chest.
"Okay," Yuuji smiled. "I'll keep reading."
They stayed like that for a long time, Megumi curled up against him. It was the most peaceful they had been since the battle.
"Thank you," Megumi finally spoke, his voice quiet.
"For what?"
"For saving me."
Yuuji did not know what to say. His heart was full, and his eyes were filled with tears. He was overwhelmed with emotions.
"I'll always save you," Yuuji replied. "And you'll always save me."
Megumi looked up, his dark eyes searching Yuuji's face.
"Always," Megumi agreed.
-
Yuuji didn't expect happiness to feel like this.
He didn't expect to feel it like a weight in his chest, a constant reminder that he was alive and he had survived. He didn't expect the heaviness of it, the way it settled in his stomach and made him want to lie down and cry.
He didn't expect to feel like crying every time Megumi smiled at him, or brushed his hair from his forehead, or held his hand.
He didn't expect happiness to hurt this much.
But he would take it. He would take the pain and the fear and the uncertainty. He would take it because it meant that he was alive.
He would take it because Megumi was alive.
At first, Megumi didn't talk much to anyone except Yuuji. He was quiet and withdrawn, but he let Yuuji touch him. He would curl up next to the pink-haired boy on the couch, and he would lean his head against his shoulder.
He would listen to Yuuji talk about his day, and he would smile when the pink-haired boy told him jokes.
Yuuji knew he wasn't the only one who felt this way. Maki, Panda, Inumaki, and Okkotsu were also grieving. But they all had each other, and they were slowly learning how to live again.
And, with time, Megumi started to come out of his shell. He began talking to the others, and he even joined them for lunch sometimes.
Yuuji was proud of him.
One day, he was in the library with Maki, and they were both laughing at some stupid joke he had made. He looked over and saw Megumi watching them, a small smile on his face.
"Hey, Fushiguro," Yuuji called. "Come join us."
Megumi hesitated for a moment, but then he walked over and sat down next to Yuuji.
"You look happier," Maki said.
"I am," Megumi replied.
Maki smiled at him.
"Me too," She said.
Megumi looked at her for a long moment, and then he leaned forward and hugged her. Maki's eyes widened in surprise, but then she hugged him back.
Yuuji watched them, two people who never showed emotion hugging each other, and he felt his heart swell.
They were healing.
-
The nightmares were the worst.
The two boys established a routine, sleeping together in Megumi's bed. On the good nights, they would sleep soundly, their bodies pressed together.
On the bad nights, one of them would wake up in a cold sweat, screaming.
They would hold each other, breathing in sync, until their heartbeats slowed. And then they would talk.
Megumi would tell Yuuji about his nightmares. About the fear, the helplessness, the darkness.
Yuuji would tell him about his. About the guilt, the shame, the rage.
Megumi would tell stories about Tsumiki, about their childhood together.
Yuuji would talk about his grandfather, about the times when he was happy and the times when he was scared.
They would talk until they fell asleep, wrapped in each other's arms.
The next morning, they would wake up and have breakfast. And then they would go on with their day.
They never talked about the bad nights.
But they didn't have to.
-
Three months have passed since the battle with Sukuna.
They started going on missions again, the two of them together. It felt good to be useful.
Yuuji sometimes found himself wondering whether their relationship was purely platonic or not. After all, they were sleeping in the same bed, cuddling, and spending every minute together.
But then, he realized that he didn't care.
As long as he was with Megumi, nothing else mattered.
They were sitting on the couch in the common room, their legs tangled together. They were watching a movie, some comedy that neither of them was really paying attention to.
"Megumi," Yuuji said.
"Hmm?"
"Do you think we're dating?"
Megumi looked at him, his expression unreadable.
"What?"
"Are we dating?" Yuuji asked again. "Like, are we boyfriends?"
"I... I don't know," Megumi stammered. "We never really talked about it."
"I know," Yuuji said. "And I know it doesn't matter. We can just keep doing what we're doing. I don't mind."
Megumi was quiet for a moment, and then he turned to Yuuji, his eyes shining with emotion.
"I want to be your boyfriend," He said.
Yuuji's heart skipped a beat.
"Me too," He smiled.
"So, we're boyfriends," Megumi confirmed.
"Yes," Yuuji said, his voice shaking.
"Good," Megumi smiled, his expression soft.
"Yeah," Yuuji said. "It is."
They looked at each other for a long moment, their hearts pounding. Then Megumi leaned forward and kissed Yuuji.
Yuuji's eyes fluttered closed, and he wrapped his arms around the dark-haired boy, pulling him closer. Megumi's lips were soft and warm, and he tasted like ginger tea and honey.
They broke apart, their foreheads pressed together, their breath mingling.
"I love you," Megumi said, his voice quiet.
"I love you, too," Yuuji whispered.
They stayed like that for a long time, just enjoying each other's company.
Their hands were intertwined, and their hearts were beating as one.
The world was quiet, and everything was right.
They were alive.