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A dull throbbing ache pounded through his skull. Something soft and cushy was underneath his head but it did nothing to ease the sensation that he was being repeatedly whacked across the head. He attempted to open his eyes before whining and covering his face at the harsh lights hanging above him. 

“Mister Potter?”

James moaned as he opened his eyes again, relaxing once the lights dimmed. The matronly woman hovering over him must have covered the windows. 

“I apologise for the sensory overload,” the matronly woman said. “How are you feeling?”

“My head hurts.”

“To be expected,” she pursed her lips, grasping his chin and prodding his forehead with the tip of her wand. He groaned and tried to pull away but either he was more weak than he realised or she was deceptively strong. “Hm, you did take a rather nasty fall. Is there any pain elsewhere or only your head?”

“My back is a little sore,” he tried to focus on anything other than the sharp prodding of her wand. “Er, otherwise I’m fine.”

“Well, there doesn’t seem to be any lasting damage anywhere else.”

“Right,” he glanced around. “Sorry, I’ve forgotten your name. I’m James. Do we know each other?”

The woman paused. A deep frown creased the lines on her face, “Madam Pomfrey. Do you know where you are, Mister Potter?”

“Yes,” he nodded. Of course he knew where he was. “Hogwarts.”

Madam Pomfrey frowned deeper, “Do you know what year it is?”

James tried to think. “Maybe 1977?”

“Correct,” she murmured, “I would have liked more certainty on that. It is currently the twenty-sixth of November, 1977. Do you know what year of schooling you are in?”

“Seventh.”

“What position do you play on the Quidditch team?”

“Chaser.”

Madam Pomfrey inhaled and exhaled sharply. “Do you know what happened to land you in the hospital wing?”

“Er…”

“I didn’t think so,” she tilted her head. “One moment, please.”

The matron swept away in a flurry of red and white robes leaving James alone. Now that he was more aware, he recognised the familiar environment of the hospital wing. He still wasn’t sure about Madam Pomfrey but he knew she was a healer. That felt right. As for himself, he knew who he was, but he couldn’t quite remember what happened. Madam Pomfrey said he took quite a fall and he did know he was on the Quidditch team. Maybe he was hurt during a match? Except, that didn’t feel right. There was usually a match in November but wasn’t that around the middle of the month? Not the end, surely.

“Hello, Mister Potter.”

James glanced up at the new people standing beside his bed. One was a rather tall and thin man with a long white beard and strangely coloured robes. The other person was a stern looking woman with tartan skirts and black hair pulled back into a tight bun. 

“Hello,” he greeted with a feeble smile. 

The woman instantly turned to Madam Pomfrey, “You were right.”

“Er…”

“Mister Potter,” the man hummed, “do you recognise anyone here?”

James looked between them. “Um, Madam Pomfrey.”

“Anyone else?”

He glanced at the stern woman, “Are you a teacher?”

“I am,” she relaxed a little. 

“I thought so. That felt right.”

“Felt right?” Madam Pomfrey scrutinised him. 

“Like you being a healer. It just made sense,” he glanced at the man. “You’re, er, I’m not sure. You’re important, right? Are you my boss?”

The man laughed, “I am the Headmaster of Hogwarts.”

“Oh. Are you new?” Of course he wasn’t James’ boss. He didn’t work. He was a teenager. 

“Headmaster Dumbledore has been the Headmaster of this school for decades,” Madam Pomfrey pursed her lips. 

“And I have been your Head of House and Transfiguration professor since you arrived,” the other woman sniffed. “My name is Minerva McGonagall, is any of this familiar to you at all?”

“Sort of?” The throbbing in his head increased and he clutched his forehead. “When you said your name it made sense. You being my teacher made sense. I know that I know you but I can’t remember your names or if we’ve met before.”

“This is most concerning,” Dumbledore frowned. “We must figure out the nature of the spell Mister Snape used. I shall go and ask Horace to call him in for a meeting. It seems he missed out some crucial details from his account of the altercation.”

Dumbledore left and James looked at the two women who were murmuring to each other in low, hurried voices. James perused the rest of the hospital wing. While nothing jumped out as overly familiar, there was a sense of comfort from being in the infirmary, like his body remembered the place even if he didn’t. 

“Am I allowed to leave?”

McGonagall blinked at him, “Do you have plans, Mister Potter?”

James felt his cheeks warm, “I don’t know. I just feel like I should be somewhere else.”

“Classes, perhaps?”

“No, that’s not it.”

“Of course not,” McGonagall said, sounding tired. “The day your band of mischief makers prioritise classes will be the end of us all.”

Her words sparked something in his mind. James frowned, “Where is…” But he couldn’t remember what he wanted to say.

“Are you remembering something?”

“No,” he glared down at his hands in frustration. “There’s someone I want to see. I don’t remember. They’re important.”

“Probably Mister Black,” Madam Pomfrey commented. 

“Yes!” James gasped. “Black. I know that name. Don’t I?”

“You do,” McGonagall sighed deeply. “Is he well enough for visitors?”

“I would like to assess him better first but this may give us an opportunity to work out exactly what he remembers.”

“Then I shall go and inform the members of my house,” McGonagall nodded. 

“I will prepare my eardrums,” Madam Pomfrey snorted with an amused look at his professor. James felt like he should call something to the professor, some sort of nickname, but by the time he started attempting to wrap his mouth around the word she was gone. 

The matron continued to perform a series of tests on him. She had him list teachers and then she conjured images of them. He managed to match the names to the faces after a while but it was difficult. She seemed heartened by his progress. 

“I believe this will be temporary,” she declared. “You seem to have forgotten the names of people but you recognise them by their faces. At the least, you know what they mean to you — to a degree. You could discern the teachers from the photographs of old Ministers.”

James nodded as she muttered to herself, noting down her thoughts on some parchment with a bright white quill. 

Before he could ask her if he could leave again, the doors to the hospital wing swung open and a voice cried, “Where is he?”

James jumped at the noise before a warmth flooded through his chest. A boy came stumbling through the curtain around his bed: lightly tanned skin, stormy grey eyes, long black hair. Immediately, James felt like he knew him. Hello, his soul sang. I know you. Do you know me?

“James,” the boy breathed. 

“Hello.”

Madam Pomfrey cleared her throat, “Before you begin your usual theatrics, Mister Black, it appears Mister Potter is suffering from a form of temporary amnesia.”

“Amnesia?”

“He cannot remember people,” she frowned. “His memory of objects and locations is sound, it is his recollection of names and the people they are attached to which is damaged.”

The boy gaped, eyes wide and wet before he all but threw himself at James. “James! Prongs, tell me that’s not true. You remember me, right?”

James blinked at him. “I do. But I don’t.”

He looked confused. Madam Pomfrey interjected, “He seems to recall the emotions associated with a person. His body remembers us even if his mind is slow to catch up. He likely feels some fondness for you but does not remember much else.”

“Yes,” James nodded furiously. He grasped the boy’s hand and squeezed, “I love you. I can feel it.”

The boy blinked and a tear fell down his cheek. He was very pretty to look at but the love he felt for him wasn’t romantic. There was no urge to kiss him or caress his face. He just wanted to make him smile. He knew that making this boy smile was very important to him. 

“Oh, Prongs,” he wrapped James in a tight hug. 

“You may wish to introduce yourself. I am going to send an owl to an old colleague at St Mungos. She is an expert in memory retrieval.”

Madam Pomfrey left, her curtain of skirts trailing behind her. The boy perched on James’ bed and sniffled. 

“I’m Sirius,” he held a hand to his chest. “Sometimes you call me Padfoot. We’ve been best friends since first year. We met—”

“On the train.”

Sirius’ face lit up, “You remember?”

“No,” Sirius’ face fell and he hurried to add, “but I know that’s right. I can’t explain it.”

“What do you remember?”

“I remember who I am. I’m on the Quidditch team. I know what Quidditch is,” James tapped his head. “People are a bit more tricky. There’s this feeling I get when I see people. You know what I mean.”

“Emotion,” Sirius sniffled. “You said you love me. You can still feel that?”

“I can. You’re really important to me, you know?”

Sirius’ lip wobbled, “Oh, Prongs you big sap. Come here,” he brought James into another fierce hug. He hummed happily and completed the embrace. This Sirius gave good hugs. 

“As much as I love this,” James began, “something is missing.”

Sirius grinned. “You didn’t think you only had one friend, right?”

After much convincing, Madam Pomfrey allowed James to leave the hospital wing so long as someone was with him at all times. James promised he wouldn’t wander around, but he felt a twinge of regret at the words. Did he usually wander around? His memories were mostly gone but he could remember certain things about himself. He liked treacle tart, he enjoyed running through the forest, he regularly sent letters to his parents (although he didn’t know them any more than he knew a complete stranger). 

The walk back to Gryffindor Tower was bizarre. He recognised many of the hallways and staircases but he couldn’t remember any of the portraits or the students who smiled at them along the way. One girl in particular stood out to him and seemed baffled when he blinked at her smiling face. 

“That’s Amelia Bones,” Sirius told him after they rounded the corner. “You’re friends.”

James thought that made sense. His chest hadn’t warmed the moment he saw her like it did with Sirius but he felt a foggy sense of recognition. He liked her. They were friends. 

“Just friends,” James nodded. 

Sirius’ expression was strange, “Are you expecting to find someone who is more than a friend?”

Yes, his body burned with want. James didn’t understand the feeling. Maybe he had a partner. But surely if he had a lover then Sirius would know? Unless it was a secret. James could see himself wrapped up in a secret relationship. A torrid love affair. A rendezvous only held in the dead of night in shadowy corners. 

They approached a portrait of a large lady in a bright pink frock. She smiled winningly at both of them. Sirius said something about a dragon in Latin and the portrait swung open. A dull sense of understanding struck him once he looked around.

Entering Gryffindor Tower felt like coming home. He smiled as he surveyed the room, catching some people by the eye and feeling a vague sense of recognition. Three girls approached them the moment the portrait slammed shut behind them. One was a tall blonde with brown eyes and a scar on her lower lip. One was a petite girl with coily hair and warm brown skin. One was a plump redhead with freckles all over her face. All three of them looked concerned and relieved to see him. They didn’t feel like strangers to him, he knew they were friends even though he didn’t know any of their names. 

“James! Merlin, finally. Snape is such a foul git—” the blonde girl started furiously. 

“Are you alright?” 

“What happened?”

“Ladies,” Sirius held a hand up. “Slow down.”

James smiled awkwardly and held his hand out for a shake, “Hello.”

The girl wearing deep purple lipstick frowned, “What’s the matter with him?”

“He’s, er, he’s lost his memory, Mary,” Sirius grimaced. At their horrified expressions, Sirius hurried to add, “Madam Pomfrey thinks it’s temporary but for the meantime… Well, James, why don’t you tell them?”

James tried for another kind smile. They looked so upset on his behalf, they must have been good friends. “Hello. I’m James. We must have been friends but I can’t really remember.”

“Oh,” the redhead covered her mouth. 

“What are your names?”

“Mary.”

“Lily.”

“I’m Marlene,” the blonde furrowed her brows. “What do you remember?”

Sirius began explaining that he only seemed to remember places and the emotions certain people invoked but James stopped listening. He couldn’t stop glancing up the stairs, for some reason he really wanted to go and find something. 

“I hope your memory comes back soon,” Mary squeezed his arm. 

“Feel better soon,” Lily nodded with downturned lips. 

Marlene patted his shoulder, “Maybe you should take him up to bed.”

“Thanks,” James smiled. “Have a nice day.”

Lily snorted, “Wow.”

Confused, he watched the three leave, all laughing and muttering to each other. He turned to Sirius in befuddlement but his friend only laughed and nudged him towards the stairs. 

“Did I upset them?”

“No, mate. It’s just funny how polite you are.”

“Am I not usually?”

“You are, but this is different. Guess it’s easier to laugh than get upset over being treated like a stranger by someone you’ve known for almost seven years.”

James frowned, “Maybe I should apologise.”

“For what? Mate, you’ve lost your memory. We can hardly blame you. It’s Snape’s fault.”

That name invoked a vicious dislike in his chest and he scowled. “I don’t like him.”

“Good. You shouldn’t. He’s a slimy little prick and he’s also the one who did this to you. Come on, let’s find Moony, he might have some idea on how we can get your memories back.”

They entered the dormitory and the sight of the lanky boy with scars sprawled out across one of the beds with a book in his hand made him smile so wide his cheeks hurt. 

“Moony!” Sirius called.

The boy startled and shot upright. With a warm smile, he stood and held his arms out and James happily threw himself into his arms. They were almost the same height with only about an inch between them and he squeezed Moony tightly and snuggled into his shoulder. 

“Oi! Why didn’t I get a greeting like that?”

Moony laughed and squeezed James back, “Sod off, Padfoot. Good to see you’re finally awake, Prongs.”

James pulled back and held his shoulders, “Is Moony your actual name? It feels like it’s you but also not you. Does that make sense?”

The boy frowned and looked over his shoulder accusingly. 

“Don’t look at me! He’s lost some of his memories. He remembered Hogwarts and Quidditch but not us. Typical. Oh, but get this, he knows how we make him feel. Isn’t that adorable?”

Sirius threw himself on one of the beds and grinned at them teasingly. James turned back to the boy with wide eyes. 

“Moony?”

“Remus,” he corrected, patting James’ arm. “My name is Remus Lupin but you all call me Moony so much I may as well get a name change.”

James smiled, “That’s a nice name. I love you, Remus.”

Remus mirrored his fond look, “Oh, you’re right, Padfoot, he’s adorable.”

Sirius laughed, “Isn’t he? You should have seen how he spoke to the girls. He tried to shake their hands.”

“No!”

“Yeah, he’s so cute like this. Can we keep him as an amnesiac?”

James huffed, “Well, now I’m upset. And I’ll remember that when I get my memories back and then I’ll…” he frowned. He wanted to threaten something but he couldn’t remember what. 

“Prank me?”

“Yes!” James lit up, “We do that a lot, don’t we?”

“Unfortunately,” Remus sighed although James could tell he was simply being dramatic. 

“We’ve slowed down a bit,” a plump blond boy said as he entered with a large bag slung over his shoulder. “Hello, Prongs. I’m Peter. Marlene filled me in.”

James smiled widely, “Peter! Nice to meet you,” he watched Peter sit on the bed closest to the bathroom and realised the only empty bed must have been his. He sat down and hummed, “Slowed down?”

Peter shrugged as he kicked his shoes off, “You’ve been preoccupied lately,” he shared a sly look with Sirius who grinned, “any idea why that may be?”

James looked between his three friends. They were fishing for something but he didn’t know what. With a shrug, he laid back on his bed, “No idea. What do we do now? Do we have classes?”

“Classes finished an hour ago,” Sirius sounded a little disappointed in his lack of answers. “We’ve got dinner in about an hour although we can go have a look around if you’d like. The doors always open thirty minutes before mealtimes.”

James hummed. For some reason, he wanted to go somewhere in particular but he didn’t know where. He just felt a strange sense of urgency. Instead of voicing his thoughts to his very nosy friends, he nodded, “Sure.”

Hogwarts was quite lovely. Maybe a bit too big considering the small population of students but he didn’t mind the extra space. It made running up and down the corridors much more fun. He could definitely see why he and his friends constantly pulled pranks — there was so much opportunity! Too much free space and not enough teachers to patrol it all, they were practically begging for a bit of mischief. 

As they wandered through the halls, Remus pointed out some of his classrooms while Sirius and Peter kept things light by telling him all of their best pranks. He saw the bathroom they flooded in third year, the statues they enchanted to tap dance in fourth, and even the portraits they managed to float into the Great Hall and stick to the walls for three days the previous year. 

James kept a smile on his face the whole time. He understood why Sirius, Remus, and Peter were his friends. They were fun and kind enough not to be impatient with him even when he kept asking ‘Who’s that?’ at every person they came across. 

As they slipped into the Great Hall for dinner, James looked up in awe at the ceiling. Sure, Sirius told him about the enchanted ceiling but seeing it with his own two eyes was a different thing entirely. They ate dinner and James stayed fairly quiet as his friends informed some of their more distant friends about James’ condition. A few people gave him pitying looks while some of the others looked vindicated. Particularly the students at the farthest table from them wearing green and silver ties. 

Slytherins, he remembered. For some reason, he didn’t really like them, but he didn’t know why. He turned to Remus and asked what their deal was and he answered in a very clipped tone that Gryffindors and Slytherins didn’t get along. It was a silly house rivalry thing, but it was a tale as old as time. Apparently, James leaned in to that rivalry a lot as a pre-teen. He felt a bit embarrassed to learn that. Maybe he didn’t know the full story but it seemed foolish and petty to despise someone purely because of their house. He said as much and his friends gave him varying looks of bewilderment. 

“You really have lost your marbles,” Remus snorted. 

“Think he’ll start singing Snape’s praises?” Peter laughed. 

Sirius made a sound of disgust, “Over my dead body. Besides, we’ve already established that we don’t like Snape. Right?”

James nodded as he laid his fork down, “Do we like any Slytherins?” He felt somewhat hopeful. He was sure there was a Slytherin they were friends with. Someone who meant a lot to him. Another best friend, maybe?

Sirius’ expression darkened and he turned to his dessert with a mulish set to his jaw. Remus cleared his throat, “Not really. We haven’t exactly endeared ourselves to them and they’ve given us no reason to extend a hand of friendship. There is Dorcas, though.”

“I suppose Dorcas is alright but the others,” Peter stuck his tongue out, “yuck.”

James frowned. The name Dorcas was somewhat familiar but he didn’t feel anything that would explain the vicious anger stirring in his gut at Peter’s words. 

“She’s alright,” Sirius grumbled. “Could have better choice in friends.”

“Sirius,” Remus said sharply. 

Sirius huffed and went back to massacring his treacle tart. 

James glanced over at the Slytherin table. Out of habit, his eyes drifted to the centre, seeking someone in particular. Although he couldn’t give them a name or any other identifiers beyond a description, one person in particular made his heart soar. He was rather far away but he could make out fair skin, dark curls, and a devastatingly pretty face. They were small and thin, but held a knife with an elegant sense of danger. For some reason, he wanted to get on his knees and ask the pretty boy to hold the knife to his throat. He wanted to caress the boy’s hands and cup his chin and look into those beautiful eyes and press his lips to his soft, pouted mouth before—

“Prongs?”

He flinched in surprise as Sirius prodded his arm. 

“Yes?”

“What are you looking at?”

“Nothing,” a surge of protectiveness welled in his chest and he felt the need to shield his pretty boy from his friends. Something about him made him want to cradle him in his arms and tuck him between his ribs to keep him safe. His little secret. 

“Hm,” Sirius’ eyes were narrowed in suspicion. 

After one of the girls from the Hufflepuff table called out to Peter, his friends thankfully changed subject by grilling Peter on her identity. Supposedly she was a friend from the chess club. James would have paid attention but his gaze was drawn across the hall. Pretty boy was leaving. 

James felt the need to follow. It was an urge so strong he almost shot to his feet and bolted but something kept him in place. Caution. 

He waited a while longer, engaging in small talk with his friends and reintroducing himself to the other people around the table as he slowly worked on his dessert. About ten minutes after pretty boy left, James made an excuse to his friends about wanting to go for a walk. They tried to follow but he said he knew where he wanted to go. 

He could feel it. 

His feet took him out of the Great Hall, though the corridors and out onto the damp grass. James followed his instincts down a long slope and through a set of pillars before he paused. Looking up, he could see several large golden hoops: the Quidditch pitch. He didn’t know how he knew, he just did. Then he stepped forward and noticed someone else was there.

A lithe figure was straddling a broom with a green and silver uniform on. After readjusting his grip on the broom, the boy shot up into the air and James felt a warmth in his chest. The feeling simmered, it was a soft, warm feeling of adoration as he watched the pretty boy fly. The boy soared with his arms spread out before flattening himself into a dangerous dive. James admired him from beside the stands, a small smile on his face. 

He didn’t want to speak. He didn’t want to ruin the moment. He was content to watch this shining star find his way home among his kin. 

The next day, James had no classes and as such he was free to do as he pleased. He asked his friends what he usually did but they only shrugged. While they spent a lot of time together, there were certain things they did separately. 

While Saturday mornings were for the group as a collective, the afternoons were for personal time. 

Peter would attend his chess club and hang out with some of his Hufflepuff friends and get high. Remus and Sirius would have a day to themselves (apparently they were a couple — how cute) and unless previously scheduled, there were to be no interruptions. As for James, they didn’t know what he usually did. 

They walked around the halls for a bit before going their separate ways. Sirius and Remus went up the stairs to the dorms and gave them explicit instructions not to interrupt for at least a few hours. He knew what that meant. As for Peter, he gave James a pat on the back and strolled towards the staircase closest to the basement to meet Amelia, his friend from chess and also the girl who smiled at him yesterday. 

After wandering around aimlessly, James felt the urge to go into his bag for the fourth time and finally gave in. He rifled through his things before coming across a sheet of parchment. His mind went blank even as he placed the tip of his wand over the parchment. This was the Marauders Map. He vaguely recalled it from last night’s ‘recap’ as organised by his friends. That was when they told him key information such as the fact that they were animagi, that Remus was a werewolf, and of course the existence of the map. 

What did Peter say the password was? 

“Mischief Managed.”

No, wait. 

“I solemnly swear I am up to no good.”

The writing appeared and James grinned. Mischief Managed was to wipe it clean, he remembered that now. As his eyes scanned the parchment, he found himself looking at the Slytherin dungeons before looking elsewhere. No, not in the kitchens, nor in the library, so what about—

Before he even registered the name placed on the Astronomy Tower, James wiped the map clean and shoved it into his bag, then he took off running. 

As he scrambled up the steps to the tower, he stopped at the top and panted for a moment before shuffling around the corner. 

Pretty Boy!

The boy’s back was turned but James would recognise that slim, athletic figure and those dark curls anywhere. The sound of his footsteps must have alerted the boy because he turned around gracefully and James’ mind went blank. 

Beautiful. 

The boy was beautiful. 

With wide doll-like green eyes, pink pouty lips, and sharp cheekbones, he was the most beautiful person James had ever seen. His glossy lashes twitched as he looked at James and his lower lip jutted out as he frowned at what he saw. 

“Potter?”

“You are lovely.”

The boy blinked, “Excuse me?”

“Exquisite, handsome, perfect,” he stepped forward. “How are you real? Are you real? I know there are ghosts at this school. Were you descended from Veela? Or perhaps from Lady Aphrodite herself?”

He tilted his head like a curious cat, “The rumours are true. You have lost your mind.”

“Forgotten some things,” he admitted, taking another step forward. Gorgeous, gorgeous, he even smelled amazing. “Not you though, I swear I could never forget you. I’ve been wanting to see you since I woke up, I know that now.”

“I believe you have me confused with my brother.”

“Your brother?”

“Sirius,” the boy raised a sleek eyebrow. “My name is Regulus. You’ve got the wrong Black.”

Regulus. Regulus, Regulus, Regulus. He mouthed the name several times. Such a lovely name. 

“That’s almost as beautiful as you.”

Regulus frowned, “Alright, Potter, I shan’t hex you because you’re clearly not in your right mind but I will ask you to leave to lessen the crippling embarrassment you will face upon regaining your memories.”

“Preposterous,” he snorted. “You don’t have to pretend, love. I can feel it,” he held a hand over his heart. “Madam Pomfrey said I’ve remembered the way people make me feel and it hasn’t led me astray so far. I trust my instincts. I trust my heart. And I know what my heart is telling me.”

“Which is?”

Very slowly, James raised a hand to cradle the side of Regulus’ face. He was even more handsome up close. Skin soft against James’ callused palm, he watched as Regulus exhaled shakily at their proximity. 

“It’s yours,” he murmured, “my heart is yours.”

Just as he lowered himself to brush his lips against Regulus’ perfectly soft lips, a burst of red light hit him in the gut and he passed out. 

Madam Pomfrey would not be happy he hit his head again. 

“Sirius!” Regulus roared as he pounded on the door to the seventh year boys dormitory. “Get your hands off of Lupin and come fix your idiotic best friend!”

After a moment of muffled cursing and dull thumping, his brother appeared with red cheeks and a fierce scowl on his face. Regulus pointedly did not look away from his face. He could tell his brother’s shirt was on backwards and he did not want to unpack why that was. 

As Sirius glared at him, he must have suddenly realised that it was Regulus of all people, standing in Gryffindor Tower and yelling at him. 

Sirius’ eyes widened and he hastily reached out to pull Regulus into the room which had a very distinct smell that he chose to ignore. Thankfully, Lupin opened the window and summoned a strong Ventus to air out the room before either of them could speak. 

“Reggie?”

“Regulus,” he corrected as he folded his arms. Disgusted, he turned away from the suspicious state of one of the beds, “Can you please cover that?”

Lupin’s face bloomed red as he hurriedly threw the bed covers over the stained sheets. How revolting. 

“Thank you.”

“Why are you here?” Sirius blurted. “You don’t— You’re a Slytherin. Slytherins shouldn’t be in the tower. Surely that’s against the rules? Moony, tell me the rules. Can we arrest him?”

“No, Padfoot,” Lupin sighed. “Hello, Regulus. Nice to see you again.”

“Again? Have you been canoodling with my gross little brother?”

“You’re gross.” Regulus huffed.

“Hardly canoodling. We just study together sometimes. He’s very intelligent,” Lupin said. No, Remus. Regulus liked when people recognised his intelligence. He eyed Remus contemplatively. He was rather handsome. Perhaps in another life. 

“Studying with my little baby brother?”

“Can we forget that part?” Remus threw his hands up. “Regulus, as I said, it’s nice to see you, but why are you in Gryffindor Tower again?”

Regulus sighed, “Potter. The imbecile is unconscious outside of the Astronomy classroom.”

“What?” Sirius gasped. 

“Merlin,” Remus rubbed his forehead. “Was it Snape again?”

“No, it was me.”

“You?” Sirius shoved his wand in his face. “Why did you hex Prongs? He’s basically like an oversized puppy at the moment. He tried to hold out Mary’s chair for her and called Peter a ‘spiffing old boy’. It’s hilarious!”

Regulus scowled. “The idiot tried to kiss me.”

“What?”

“Follow me.”

Regulus led them through Gryffindor territory with his head held high. He ignored the whispering and the outright glares. Gryffindors were so boorish. His thoughts were proven as his brother ranted and raved the whole way to the Astronomy Tower, arms waving and voice so loud the portraits three floors away could probably hear him. 

They climbed the steps to the Astronomy Tower and Regulus gestured to Potter who was still sprawled out across the floor with a dazed smile on his face. He waved his wand over the imbecile and watched as he slowly woke up, rubbing his forehead and whimpering like a puppy. 

A twinge of regret kindled in his chest. A kiss from James Potter was all he’d ever wanted but not like this. Not while Potter was confused and unable to remember anything. 

“Uh—”

“James!” Sirius helped him to his feet. “What happened? Why did Reggie hex you?”

“I already told you why.”

“Well, you’re obviously lying. Prongs wouldn’t do that. Right, Prongs?”

Potter blinked his wide baby cow eyes and Regulus held back a whine. He had the prettiest eyes. A rich brown and perfectly round. With his dark brown skin, black curls, and gorgeous smile, James Potter was a menace to society. Anyone attracted to men couldn’t help but fall for his lovely face and even lovelier personality. His physique only made his desire worse. Such a tall and muscular frame… Regulus could climb him like a tree. 

“Do what?”

Remus helped him stand straight, “Regulus said you’re confused. Apparently you tried to kiss him?”

“Oh, yeah I did.”

Regulus’ heart flipped. Stupidly fit bastard. Going around, attempting to kiss people and giving Regulus a heart attack in the process. He was lucky that Regulus was such a good person. Many people would have been glad to take advantage of Potter while he was so vulnerable. 

Annoyed, he glared at the two other idiots, “How could you let him walk around in this state? He’s obviously addled in the mind. One of you should have stayed with him.”

“Piss off, Reggie. He’s fine, he’s obviously just confused. Maybe he thought you were me.”

“I hope not,” he and Remus said in unison although for very different reasons. 

“No, I didn’t,” Potter rushed to assure them. “I knew it was Regulus.”

Sirius frowned, “And you wanted to kiss him?”

“Of course!”

“Why?” Remus asked.  

Potter gave them a look, “Because he’s my boyfriend, obviously.”

Potter’s madness must have been contagious because Regulus’ mind conjured up a scene where James Potter confidently stated that Regulus was his boyfriend. 

Boyfriend. 

“Boyfriend?” Sirius mirrored his incredulity. 

“Prongs, mate, you don’t have a boyfriend,” Remus said gently. “I think you’ve gotten confused.”

“No,” Potter insisted stubbornly. Wide brown eyes searched for him and he felt his cheeks warm at the phantom feeling of his wide palm cradling his cheek. “Madam Pomfrey was right. I can remember how people make me feel and I know how Regulus makes me feel.”

Remus softened, “Alright, but Regulus isn’t your boyfriend.”

“Yes, he is!”

Regulus folded his arms. He wasn’t. Oh, how he wished he was. But he couldn’t pretend like they were a couple. The most they’d done was speak a few times. And, sure, those moments were incredibly special to him. Their intimate talks and late night conversations on the Quidditch pitch, the Astronomy Tower, or in the kitchens meant the world to him. James made him feel special. He made him feel seen. 

But they were just friends. Maybe friends was too strong. He liked to think Potter was his…friend…but did he feel the same way? 

“He’s definitely not,” Sirius spat, “I’d know if you two were together.”

“He has been sneaking around a lot,” Remus murmured. 

“Right! So, you might have a boyfriend. Maybe you’re just confused and you think it’s Reggie.”

Still stubbornly shaking his head, Potter said, “I know how I feel. I don’t want anyone else. I want Regulus. He’s my boyfriend.” 

“Potter,” he cleared his throat, “we aren’t together.”

The look on James’ face was devastating. He looked completely crushed. “We’re not?”

“No.”

James looked at him with sad eyes before he suddenly slumped to the ground and clutched his head. “Ouch.”

“James!” Sirius dropped to his knees. Remus hurried to do the same which left Regulus standing awkwardly as Potter began to violently tug at his own hair before passing out in Remus’ arms. 

Great. Regulus killed James Potter, the boy of his dreams. How typical. 

They had to give a lengthy statement to Madam Pomfrey. She was not happy with Regulus for hexing him but she couldn’t actually blame him for sending Potter into some sort of seizure. In her words, his mind was overloaded with information and his body gave up to give himself a break from the ‘emotional turmoil’. Regulus avoided Remus’ very knowing eyes. That boy knew too much. 

Before Regulus could leave, Madam Pomfrey gave him some rather horrible news. 

“I’m sorry, could you repeat that?”

Madam Pomfrey sent him a pinched look, “You will have to indulge in Potter’s fantasies. His mind is built out of splinters at this moment in time. Anything too disruptive to the fragile peace in his mind will cause him to keep passing out, thus resetting all progress he may have made.”

“You’re saying he has to date him?” Sirius shrieked. 

“All he has to do is not outright refute Potter’s claims.”

“I will not pretend to be his boyfriend,” Regulus refused. “That is cruel.”

“You don’t have to kiss,” Remus suggested. “Just talk to him and maybe don’t hex him again.”

Sullenly, Regulus folded his arms. How was it fair that he was getting everything he’d ever wanted in the worst way possible?

“And deal with Potter taunting me for the rest of my life once you fix his mind? No, thank you. I’ll spare myself the humiliation.”

“We won’t let that happen,” Sirius insisted. Regulus stared at him in shock. “Look, I’m not too happy about this but I don’t like seeing James in the hospital. All you have to do is not be a little shit to him. You know James, we’ll say you’re taking it slow and he’ll be the most chivalrous bastard around.”

“Language.”

“Apologies,” Sirius nodded at Madam Pomfrey. “Please, Reg? I’ll owe you a massive favour. Just— Just let him do most of the work. He already thinks you’re together which is the hardest part done because who on Earth would want to date you—”

Regulus scowled. 

“What I mean to say,” Sirius hurried to add, “is that James is good. He’s kind. He won’t mistreat you even after this charade ends. And we’ll be there anyway. We’ll do the talking. Clear things up.”

Regulus sighed. He didn’t want to. He really, really didn’t want to. It felt cruel to mess with Potter’s confused brain even more but he also didn’t want to see him lying in the hospital wing until Snape reversed whatever he’d done. Who else would keep him company during late night stargazing sessions?

“Do you know when this will be fixed?”

Madam Pomfrey sighed, “It appears that Mister Snape invented his own altered version of a befuddlement jinx. Nowhere near as powerful as an Obliviate, but it has scrambled his brain enough to cause temporary amnesia. We believe it should clear up within a week or two at most.”

“See! Only a week,” Sirius begged. “Please, Reggie.”

Regulus sighed, “Fine. But I’m not holding his hand.”

Regulus was holding James Potter’s hand. 

“We didn’t want to tell anyone,” Regulus recited the lines Remus wrote down. “Our relationship is a secret. We’re keeping it private.”

“And you’re moving slowly, very slowly,” Sirius said a touch too loudly, “kisses are off the table.”

James’ eyes were wide and reverent behind his glasses as he stared at Regulus. Fuck, he was so pretty, how was Regulus supposed to cope?

“Of course I knew that,” James nodded at him. “I would never forget you. I just couldn’t figure out why I was feeling that way but I know how much you mean to me.”

Regulus’ cheeks warmed as James caressed his hand, “Thank you, James.”

“You are so lovely,” James said with a sappy smile. 

“Hm,” Sirius narrowed his eyes. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. Are we making you uncomfortable?” Regulus asked his brother sharply. This was Sirius’ fault, in part, so he could deal with the consequences. 

Sirius rolled his eyes, “Come on, lads. Let’s get James back to the dorm. No more madness for the day.”

Remus laughed, “Have you forgotten his need to eat?”

“Kitchens, then.”

Madam Pomfrey signed James out with a very stern look at the rest of them. They decided that someone should probably stay with James at all times. He was an excellent judge of character but he was incredibly vulnerable at the moment. Too many people would be thrilled to take advantage of his naïveté.

They walked the short distance to the kitchens in relative silence. James kept tugging at Regulus’ hand and playing with his fingers and rings with a giddy expression on his face. Remus and Sirius stayed behind them. Regulus pretended not to hear Sirius grumbling lowly in a mixture of French and Korean so James couldn’t understand them. 

As they entered the kitchens, Regulus’ heart dropped when he saw his friends at their usual spot. Fuck. He’d forgotten they were supposed to meet for their Saturday early dinner together. He thought they would have gone back to the dorms by now.

“Reg?” Evan frowned. Barty snapped his head up just as Dorcas and Pandora whirled around to look at them. 

“Hello,” Regulus tried to subtly remove his hand from James’ grip but he was clinging too tightly. He glanced sideways and saw a dark glare on his face directed at Evan. 

“Don’t like him.”

Regulus sighed, “James, these are my friends. Evan Rosier, Barty Crouch, Dorcas Meadowes, and Pandora Lestrange,” he pointed to them all in turn. 

James kept frowning. 

“What is this?” Dorcas asked with an amused look on her face. 

“The rumours are true, Potter’s gone barmy!” Barty seemed thrilled. 

“Piss off, Crouch,” Sirius huffed. “Can we get some food?”

An elf appeared beside Sirius at the request, already eager to take their order. Regulus scowled at his brother and kicked him in the shin. 

“Ow! Fuck, Reggie. Fine, may we please get some food, little elfling?”

“Your lack of manners is abysmal and more befitting of a feral niffler,” Regulus finally worked his hand out of James’ grip and smiled at the elf, “Hello, Rollie, may we have some dinner?”

“Absolutely, Mister Regulus!”

“Thank you,” he shook Rollie’s frail hand and took his seat beside Evan. Before he could say a word, James planted himself on his other side, bodily shoving Sirius out of the way. 

Sirius huffed, “And you say I have no manners.”

“At least he has an excuse.”

James took his hand again, “These are your friends?”

“Yes.”

“Do they know about us?”

“Keeping secrets, Reg?” Pandora grinned. Their sharp amusement made him want to hide. James was doing this on purpose. 

“No, they don’t.”

“Well,” James frowned, “my friends know.”

“They didn’t used to,” he ground out. 

“But they do now.”

“Ah!” Dorcas said with understanding. “This is where you’ve been disappearing to?”

Evan laughed, “With Potter of all people? Merlin, Reg, what happened to your standards?”

“His standards are perfectly fine,” James snapped. 

Regulus squeezed his hand, “He’s teasing, darling.”

James’ eyes widened before a bright smile spread across his face. “I like when you call me that!”

“Of course you do,” he murmured. 

Sirius made a disgusted noise, “This is so weird.”

“I’m confused,” Pandora admitted. “Are you two together?”

“Yes!” James chirped. 

His friends traded heavily amused looks. 

“And you remembered that even after your mind was wiped?”

James nodded so quickly he worried his head might roll off, “Of course! I’d never forget my Reggie.”

Regulus’ face burned, “Let’s not do this now—”

“No, no, you’ve been holding out on us,” Barty grinned sharply. “How romantic, Potter.”

“Almost as if it were written in the stars,” Pandora said, tone deceptively light. Regulus narrowed his eyes at her. He knew exactly what she was thinking. 

His crush on James had never been a secret in their group. They all saw the way he watched James and blushed every time their eyes met. It didn’t take long to put the pieces together. Honestly, it was embarrassing. He blamed his twelve-year-old self for being so bad at hiding his feelings. 

“Shouldn’t you all be going?” Regulus asked waspishly. 

Dorcas widened her eyes, “But, Regulus, you’re the one who was late. This is a standing appointment. No excuses to cancel or miss Saturday early dinner unless you’re dead.”

“Someone’s about to be,” he promised her through gritted teeth. 

Sirius laughed, “Come on, little Reggie—”

“Don’t call me that.”

“—lighten up! Let’s all get to know each other. I’ll start. I’m Sirius, the better brother. I’m a Scorpio—”

“Ahh!” Pandora screamed in horror, rightfully so. 

Sirius scowled, “Excuse you, missy!”

“No wonder you have such dark energy,” she shivered and shifted away from him. 

“I’ve just been insulted,” Sirius said. He turned to Lupin, “Moony, defend my honour.”

“I’m a Pisces.”

“Ah!” Pandora screamed again. 

“I’m an Aries,” James smiled, “Regulus is a Leo. Did you know they are incredibly compatible signs?”

Barty snorted, “Yes, we did actually, because Regulus—”

Evan covered his mouth, “Be nice, Barty.”

Regulus tried not to think back to the extensive research he did back in second year after discovering James’ astrological sign. He still felt a creeping shame for manipulating Sirius into telling him when and where exactly James was born so he could accurately plot his birth chart. They were startlingly compatible. It was the only thing to make up for the mortification of daydreaming about his romantic connection with James Potter who barely acknowledged his existence. 

“Let’s go,” Pandora said. “Leave Reg to his first public date with his boyfriend.”

“Alright,” Dorcas shrugged. “Although I expect to have a chat with you alone soon, Potter. Just us.”

“All of us,” Evan corrected. 

“None of your lot allowed,” Barty slapped his shoulder and squeezed tightly enough that James’ lips twisted into a grimace. “You’re alright with that, aren’t you, big boy?”

“Barty…”

“He’s fine, we’re all friends here.” Barty said with a sharp smile. 

“Yeah,” James cleared his throat. “I’d like that actually. Get a chance to properly meet Reggie’s friends.”

The heat in his face felt almost uncomfortable. His friends left, sending amused looks at him even while James was watching. Once the portrait swung closed behind them, he ignored the way the others were looking at him and picked at his food. He wouldn’t apologise for his friends if that was what they were expecting. 

“I like them,” Remus said. “They’ve got heart, and they clearly adore you.”

“They’re good,” James agreed. “They love you. That’s what matters.”

Regulus couldn’t have stopped his smile even if he tried. If there was one thing he was truly, wholly grateful for it was his friends. 

“Thank you.”

“Not sure how I feel about blondie,” Sirius huffed. “But the others are alright. Especially Dorcas. I’ll have to tell Marls we spoke to her. She’ll explode.”

“Marlene McKinnon?”

“You know her?”

Regulus shook his head, “All I know is what I’ve seen on the pitch,” and the many, many things Dorcas ranted about. It seemed her crush was requited after all. He could work with that. It would be good to have an ally in the ‘adoring stupid Gryffindors’ games. 

“Cheese?”

Regulus blinked at the hand hovering above his plate. James held a little bowl of grated cheese above his roast potatoes. “How do you know I like cheese on my potatoes?”

“You’re my boyfriend,” James frowned. “I know what you like.”

Regulus didn’t understand. While James believed otherwise, they weren’t actually together. So, how did he know? Unless Sirius told him. Mother always deprecated his habit of sprinkling grated cheese over his potatoes. She said it was too plebeian. He didn’t care. It was delicious. 

As he added the cheese onto his food, he couldn’t help but watch the side of James’ face as he happily listened to Sirius and Remus as they recited some old prank of theirs which he’d forgotten and inquired about. 

He was lovely. Inside and out. 

Regulus was doomed. 

James didn’t know why his boyfriend seemed so confused by his attentiveness. Little things, things that any good boyfriend would know, even things a decent enough friend would know, Regulus seemed taken aback every time he proved he had been paying attention to the boy he loved. 

When James brought him cheese for his potatoes. When James asked if he’d like to fly before bedtime because Regulus always preferred to fly at night. When James handed his scarf to him on a Hogsmeade trip because Regulus always got cold easily. When James held his hand. When James complimented him. When James sent him little notes throughout the day to remind him that he was thinking about him. When James smiled at him widely across the hallway. When James handed him the hairband he always kept on his wrist for him so he could tie his hair back during a difficult revision session. When James carried his bag for him. When James waited for him outside of his classes. When James asked him if he would like the last chocolate cauldron in the box. 

Stupid things, some bigger, all equally innocuous. Yet each made Regulus either bloom bright red or caused him to stare at James in complete befuddlement. It was beginning to invoke a deep sense of despair, a growing horror that he was usually nowhere near as attentive as he should be. The thought was enough to send him into full cardiac arrest. 

James Potter, a bad boyfriend? Unthinkable. 

James Potter, a bad boyfriend to Regulus Black specifically? Impossible. 

It was ludicrous. He would never mistreat Regulus. He didn’t know much but he did know he’d been head over heels for him for almost five years. Ever since a tiny, grouchy Regulus kicked him in the shin back in his second year, he’d been done for. He couldn’t remember what he did to provoke such a reaction, the specifics were hazy; he did remember staring after Regulus in awe, watching his sleek black curls bounce as he walked away with his friends bookending him. 

After a week of having Regulus back, he decided to try and figure out how their relationship started. The details evaded him, and it was probably the thing he was most upset about. However, before he could begin his investigation, he was summoned to the headmaster’s office. 

When he saw the tall couple waiting for him on the other side of the door, he instantly knew who they were. He couldn’t remember their names or their birthdays or anything about them, but he knew what he felt. Respect, heartfelt admiration, and a warm sense of appreciation for everything they did for him. 

Love. Familial love.

These were his parents. 

His father was his height with long legs, dark curly hair, and a nice set of tailored robes on his trim figure. Deep smile lines marked his warm brown skin and a few wrinkles lined his eyes, pointing to the few greying hairs at his temples. Beside his father, his mother was almost as tall as her husband but she was plumper with round cheeks and a warm smile. She had the same dark brown skin as James and her hair was short and tightly coiled. Her brown eyes were the same as his and they sparkled with warmth as she looked at him. 

Before any of them could speak, James threw himself into their arms and wrapped himself tightly around the two people he loved so, so much. Dumbledore started talking, making introductions as if James needed them. He would always know them. Like he would always know Sirius and Remus and Peter and their other friends. Like he would always know Regulus. His heart and soul could never forget them, because James loved with every breath he took and his heart would always call out for them even when his mind was not his own. 

“Baby,” his mama murmured as she cradled his face. 

James sniffled. Tears fell freely from his eyes, staining his glasses. 

His dad wiped James’ tears and squeezed his shoulder, “Let it all out, son.”

James cried for a long time. There was something strange about being held by two people he loved so much yet couldn’t remember for the life of him. Over the past few days, his memories had started to peek through. Small things. Inconsequential and trivial details that didn’t amount to much. He knew Sirius hated olives. He knew Remus’ preferred spot in the library. He knew Lily had an unpleasant sister. He knew Marlene had a crush on Dorcas. He knew Mary wanted to be a fashion designer. He knew Peter was scared of the dark. 

And Regulus…he knew so much about Regulus. Again, only small things, his likes and dislikes, but at least it was something. 

It seemed the more he spent time with people, the more he remembered about them. Madam Pomfrey suspected his memory would return on its own with time but she was still trying to figure out a way to speed up the process for his benefit. 

Although his parents weren’t with him during the school year, he knew them instantly. In the same breath, he remembered his papa’s love of cauldron cakes while his mama preferred peppermint toads. It wasn’t much but it was something. Anything more than the awful emptiness in his head was worth it. 

“You’re going to love him, Mama,” James gushed as he led his parents through Hogsmeade. Dumbledore permitted his parents to follow him to meet with his friends, provided that it happened off school grounds. 

They were all waiting for him at the Three Broomsticks and he was rather giddy at the prospect of introducing his parents to his boyfriend. He’d never done that before. This was his first relationship and he knew his parents were just as excited for him as he was. 

“I feel like we know so much about him already.”

James’ eyes widened, “Really?”

His papa laughed as they walked past a group of students. They all stopped and stared at the attractive older couple before blushing and skittering away. James wrinkled his nose. Ew. 

“You only talk about him all the time,” his papa teased, nudging James. 

“Do I?”

“Yes. It’s rather sweet,” Mama said. 

James’ face warmed. At least he didn’t have to worry about his devotion to Regulus. If his parents knew then that meant more than most people would realise. He didn’t know how he knew but he knew he’d had crushes before. He couldn’t remember who they were. They were fleeting, unimportant. Not like Regulus. He would know Regulus even in the dark. 

“There they are,” his papa suddenly said. “I see Remus. He looks even taller surrounded by your little friends.”

James laughed as he shuffled through the crowd. His friends were waiting outside of the pub for him. Like his papa said, he could see Remus standing a few inches above everyone else. Barty and Dorcas were next in height followed by Evan and Marlene. Mary and Regulus were the shortest by far but he could see Mary’s pink skirt and Regulus’ shiny black boots through the huddle. 

“Prongs!” Sirius cried, shoving past Marlene. “Is that— Effie!” Sirius completely bypassed James and his papa to throw himself into Mama’s arms. “I’ve missed you so much! Why are you here? Have you come to take me home? Please take me home.”

His mama laughed adoringly and squeezed Sirius into a motherly hug, “My boy.”

Sirius snuggled into her arms and James watched them fondly. Something snapped into place in his brain as he observed them. They were close. He remembered Sirius had run away from home and the moment his mama laid eyes on him, he was hers. 

“Remus! Peter!” His papa cheered as he dragged them both into a tight hug. His friends laughed and greeted his dad before introducing him to the rest of their friends. After a moment of polite conversation, his papa turned to him and winked. “Now, while I’m thrilled to meet all of you, there is one person in particular I would like to speak with.”

Regulus’ face was an almost alarming shade of red. He stared at James’ papa with wide eyes before ducking his head as Evan murmured something to him. A twinge of irritation plucked at his chest. It was irrational and unfair but he’d always wondered about Regulus’ closeness with Evan. He remembered that the moment he laid eyes on the boy sitting in the kitchens. Something dark and desperate whispered threat even though he knew it was ridiculous. 

“Mama, Papa,” he cleared his throat, “this is Regulus. My boyfriend.”

Mama’s eyes lit up and Papa clapped his hands in excitement. Regulus stayed cherry red even as he cut James with a very sharp look which screamed betrayal. Warmth bloomed in his chest as his mother carefully pulled Regulus into an embrace, a stark difference from the way his dad almost lifted him off of his feet with a bear hug. 

“Do you know how many years we’ve been hearing about you?” Papa huffed as he stepped back. “I could draw you from memory alone. ‘He has the prettiest green eyes like fresh pine needles, the loveliest smile, the smoothest skin, the most luxurious black curls and the cutest freckles like the stars in the night sky’.”

“Papa!” He switched into Spanish, “Don’t embarrass me in front of him!”

“Sorry, sorry,” Papa laughed. 

Now Regulus’ face was definitely a worrying crimson. He fretted for a moment. He wouldn’t explode, would he? Could that happen? No, that wasn’t possible. But why was Regulus so red around his papa?

“We’ll get going,” Lily said, her hand entwined with Mary’s who was giggling. 

“Yes, we’ll leave you to it,” Dorcas said as she tugged Pandora. Crouch complained a little but Rosier whispered something in his ear and he capitulated. James waved goodbye as Peter followed along, still engaged in conversation with Marlene who kept shooting glances towards Dorcas with flushed cheeks.

Once they were more or less alone, James stared at Sirius and Remus, the only two who’d lingered behind. Not that he didn’t love them, but he’d hoped it would be just him and Regulus. 

Clearly, Remus understood his forlorn expression as he wrapped an arm around Sirius and gently guided him away from Mama’s warm embrace. “Come on, gorgeous. We’ve got shopping to do.”

“Shopping?”

“You said you’d help me pick out a gift for me mam’s birthday, remember?”

Sirius brightened. “Yes! Hope isn’t going to know what hit her— Oh, Effie, I’m sorry, I have to go!”

Mama laughed as she pinched his cheek, “Go on, dear. Make sure you make a good impression, she’ll be your mother-in-law soon enough and you want her on your side!”

Sirius’ face was almost as red as his brother’s. They spoke a little more but James was too distracted looking at Regulus. The shade of pink on his cheeks really was alarming but it somehow suited him. It enhanced the colour of his lips in a fetching way. He didn’t know someone could look good while bright red, of course Regulus was the exception to the rule. 

Papa sighed as Sirius and Remus finally left, “I suppose I’m chopped liver to that boy,” he turned to Regulus, “you wouldn’t happen to be interested in potions, would you? Out of all of James’ close friends, only Remus has a passing interest and even he isn’t too bothered with my craft.”

“You’re just sore that all of my boys prefer me,” Mama said triumphantly. 

“Just one — that’s all I’m asking!”

“Regulus is a prodigy in potions,” James said proudly. 

Still blushing, Regulus nodded as Papa turned to him excitedly. “Professor Slughorn has offered to guide me through achieving a mastery in the subject.”

Papa practically vibrated, “Excellent! Oh, this is truly wonderful! Come now, let’s go over the process. First things first, do not take Horace up on his deal. While he’s a wonderful potioneer, he hasn’t half the imagination or creativity this line of work requires. He’s very by the book. You need someone who will push you to challenge yourself—” and they were off. With Regulus hurrying after Papa and nodding eagerly, they disappeared into the Three Broomsticks. 

James smiled at Mama. “That went well.”

Amused, Mama hooked her arm in his as he held the door open for her, “I think this was long overdue.” Then she snorted as she saw Regulus and Papa at one of the corner tables, both gesturing wildly and speaking rapidly. “I also think we’re going to need to drag them away from their cauldrons in the near future.”

“—truly a visionary in the field. Nobody is half as innovative as he is, it’s terrible that so many potions masters are so content to follow every recipe according to the old rules. If nobody ever experimented then how would we ever invent anything new? Speaking with the Fleamont Potter was such an honour. I couldn’t believe it when he offered to be my mentor! Gaining a mastery has always been my dream but a mastery taught by Fleamont Potter himself… He never takes students! I’d be his first ever!”

James nodded, a serene smile on his face. 

“Are you listening? James, this is incredibly important. If I gain at least five Outstandings, including Potions, then I would be automatically accepted by Master Potter to be his apprentice. Potions apprentice — me!”

“Uh-huh.”

“Of course, that’s only if I manage to gain five Outstandings. I’m confident with my Ancient Runes and Charms, and I have Astronomy done already, but sometimes I struggle with Transfiguration. The details can be so tricky, I always end up presenting something basic when I’m asked to demonstrate. Everyone knows the flashier the better, if I could create something more detailed then I’m sure I’d be guaranteed an Outstanding. Nevermind the fact that my written exams are always perfect. Theory is so simple but practice is nothing like—”

“Yeah.”

“—not to mention Potions! No matter how well I might do in every other subject, if I don’t get an Outstanding in Potions then I’m done for. Oh, no, I’d never be able to live down the shame. The Fleamont Potter knowing I was too foolish and incapable that I couldn’t even manage a simple NEWT exam; how could I ever be eligible for a mastery if I can’t pass a school exam? What am I thinking? I’ll never be able to do it.”

“You’re very cute.”

Regulus closed his potions book, “James, we’re supposed to be studying,” he said frowning. Did James not understand how important this was?

James glanced purposefully around the empty classroom they were in. “Considering you haven’t stopped ranting about my papa since we sat down…”

Regulus’ face burned, “Your father is Fleamont Potter.”

“I’m aware.”

“The youngest potions master in the world! The Fleamont Potter! Owner of Potter Potions Enterprises — they own stock in almost every branch of potion making! Their employees supply the potions and salves to St Mungos, the Ministry, every dragon sanctuary in the Northern hemisphere…”

James shrugged, “I guess.”

Regulus couldn’t believe it. How did James not understand? With a frantic gesture, he repeated, “The Fleamont Potter!”

“Papa is going to have kittens when I bring you home for Christmas.”

“You have a cat?” Regulus frowned. “Where?”

James’ face did that thing where he looked at Regulus like he was about to try and kiss him again. Cheeks warming, he wondered when that expression became so commonplace. “Figure of speech, love.”

“Oh.”

“Mama thinks it’s hilarious, by the way. She said your crush on Papa is adorable and Papa is just happy that he’s someone’s favourite.”

“I do not have a crush.”

“Sirius said you used to collect his potions journals.”

Betrayed, Regulus slammed his textbook down. “That vile wretch!”

“No, it’s cute,” James insisted. 

“It’s not a crush,” Regulus said sternly. “It’s not. I just think he happens to be incredibly accomplished and I admire both his intelligence and dedication to the craft. He’s been able to cut down brewing time on so many important potions. Skelegrow used to take three times as long and the blood replenishing potions are now able to work twice as fast once taken! Not to mention the Potter specialty antiseptic and anti-inflammatory bandages are able to reduce the scarring from all manner of spells and dark magic — including dark creatures scratches! All thanks to your father.”

Admittedly, once upon a time Regulus did have a tiny crush on Fleamont Potter. Only a tad, though. More of a hero worship than anything and it certainly wasn’t anything like that anymore. He was just…a fan. A very big fan. He thought he’d burst when he saw Fleamont Potter walking towards him the other day, and then he’d noticed just how handsome he was and he’d wondered if James would mature as handsomely. After seeing how beautiful Euphemia was, he realised that he was truly ruined, because James would be even more exquisite than the both of them. 

James seemed surprised, “Really? I didn’t know that.”

“Your memory is still off,” Regulus shrugged, “it can’t be helped.”

There was a pause before James laughed a little. “Yeah, I suppose.”

Regulus sent him a curious glance but James was fiddling with something in his lap. 

“So, thoughts about Christmas?”

“Excuse me?”

“You didn’t…”

Regulus remembered what James said earlier, just before the cat misunderstanding. 

“I’m invited to your house?”

“Of course.”

Swallowing, Regulus fiddled with the corner of his potions book. “Oh.”

“Would you like to come? It’ll be brilliant. We always have a huge tree that we cut down from a forest so it’s authentic. We make a whole day of it — going out and searching, then bringing it back and decorating it. Mama always makes the best dinner and Papa’s desserts are to die for. I mean, it’s the only thing he can cook but it’s really good. Although, I suppose if you come he’ll be locked away in the basement at his brewing station until Mama drags him out by his ear.”

Heart hammering, Regulus bit his lip. Mother wouldn’t be expecting him home since she never liked having him around unless she needed him. The school would have no reason to inform her of his whereabouts if they thought he was going back home, and it’s not like they would check where he was going once he exited the train. 

“Perhaps we should discuss this closer to the date,” he said slowly. Madam Pomfrey theorised that within the next week or two James would be back to normal and by then he’d probably want nothing to do with Regulus. Getting his hopes up about a Christmas with the Potters wasn’t clever, nevermind the fact that he was entertaining the idea of having studying his mastery under Fleamont Potter. The man would probably hate him when the truth was uncovered. 

Horror struck him. What if they thought he’d only befriended James to get close to his father? Worse, what if they thought he’d planned this whole thing to put James in a vulnerable position so he could take advantage of him? It wasn’t true at all and anyone who knew him would know that but James didn’t know him, not really. His parents even less so. 

Nauseous, Regulus packed up his books with a wave of his wand. 

“Reg?” James sounded devastated. “I’m sorry. It was too soon. I shouldn’t have asked—”

“I think you should wait until your memory comes back. Meeting the parents is one thing but spending the holiday together…” Regulus felt sick, “I need to go. Please don’t follow me.”

James’ eyes were wide and sad, “But, Regulus—”

“Please,” he whispered. 

Lowering his head, James nodded. “Okay.”

“Thank you,” he said, then he swallowed, “I think it’s best if we don’t see each other for a little while.”

James didn’t look up but he saw the way his eyes screwed shut. He didn’t seem close to having another seizure but just to be safe he would send a letter to his brother to check on him. 

Without another word, Regulus fled with a heavy weight settling in his chest. 

A forlorn sigh fell from James’ lips. 

Three days had passed since Regulus fled from their study session and James hadn’t stopped moping since. All he could think about was where he went wrong as he fiddled with the small ring in his hands and traced the little engraving of a phrase in Korean he couldn’t decipher. The ring meant a lot to Regulus — a gift from his grandmother, Melania, shortly before she passed. The fact that he hadn’t come to retrieve it said everything James needed to know: Regulus hated him. 

“This is driving me mental,” he heard a muffled voice outside of his curtains.

“Padfoot, be gentle.”

“I’m being bloody gentle! At least I haven’t dragged them into a cupboard by their hair and bolted the door shut. You should be thankful for my restraint.”

“Restraint is the one thing you sorely lack,” Remus murmured. “Be nice. He’s never been heartbroken before and Madam Pomfrey said he’d still be a bit funny for the next few days until his brain has fixed itself.”

“I can hear you,” James said. 

There was a pause, then his curtains were ripped open and Sirius loomed over him. 

“James, this is getting ridiculous. I don’t understand why you won’t just follow my advice.”

“Your advice was terrible.”

“Confronting him is the best option! You don’t know Regulus like I do and your brain is still noodles. If you just talk to him—”

James glanced away. 

Sirius’ rant faltered before dying out. Suddenly, his eyes widened. “Oh, Merlin.”

“What?” Remus asked, finally giving in to his nosiness as he shuffled over to hover by James’ bed. 

James didn’t look at him, he kept his eyes on his hands where he’d been twisting the silver ring Regulus left behind the last time they’d spoken. It was too small to fit any of James’ fingers but he could just about get it around the tip of his pinky. 

“You devious bastard,” Sirius said. 

“What?” Remus repeated. 

“He’s fine.” Sirius said as he thrust a hand towards him, “Look at him! No seizures, no headaches, no clueless questions and puppy-dog eyes. He’s James again!”

Remus looked confused for all of three seconds, “Oh fuck me, Prongs. When?”

James tried for innocence, “When, what?” He asked lightly. 

“When did you get your memory back?” Sirius said in a tight voice. 

They stared down at him as heat crept up his neck. 

“Um…”

“Merlin’s bollocks, Prongs!” Sirius lashed out and whacked him across the shoulder. “How long?”

“The day my parents came to visit,” he said. 

James didn’t know whether it was seeing all of the people he loved most but as his parents went to leave, watching his papa hug a blushing Regulus while Mama fussed over Sirius and Remus made everything click into place. The memories walloped him with the force of a bludger and he ended up tripping over. 

Everyone fussed over him as he stood, but he’d felt fine. He felt perfect, actually. Because when he opened his eyes, Regulus Black was hovering over him with his pretty green eyes sparkling and his brows drawn tight in concern. Then he’d felt those soft hands in his and he’d been too giddy to admit the truth. 

In a halting manner, he explained it to his friends. He explained the memory of his altercation with Snape which finally came back to him. He mentioned seeing Regulus for the first time and having no trouble understanding the deep love he felt for him after years of watching him from afar. He awkwardly told them how being around Regulus made him forget himself, and how he’d realised that Regulus would probably never want to speak to him after James humiliated him so publicly by declaring him his boyfriend to everyone who would watch. 

“He probably thinks I’m mad,” James said, mouth downturned, “he probably can’t wait for me to get my memory back so he can get rid of me for good.”

“But you have your memory back,” Remus said, “he just doesn’t know it.”

Face creeping with heat, he shrugged, “I just wanted to know what it would feel like to have him like me back.”

Sirius sighed, “You have to tell him.”

“I know.”

“You have to tell him right now.”

With a glum nod, he said, “I know.”

“For what it’s worth, I don’t think he’ll be upset for the reasons you’re thinking. You were being an idiot but you’re still you,” Sirius said firmly but not unkindly. 

James didn’t really know what that meant but he rose anyway. Sirius was right. He needed to tell Regulus. He respected him too much to never tell him the truth and his mama taught him that it was always best to clear up misunderstandings early lest things get worse and fester like an open wound. 

“Good luck, mate,” Remus said. Sirius repeated the well-wishes and he waved half heartedly at them as he left the dorm room. 

The common room was blissfully void of his other friends and made quick work of navigating the castle, one destination in mind after a brief glance at the map to confirm his suspicions. Despite what Sirius would insist, he hadn’t been stalking Regulus. Although, he’d been watching him on the map ever since they made it and he’d learned his routines pretty easily even before he started trying to talk to him. 

At this time in the evening, Regulus would be stargazing. Lucky for him, it was a hobby they shared, although they interpreted the phrase in very different ways. 

The second he laid eyes on the boy leaning against the railing of the Astronomy Tower, James smiled to himself. 

“Hello.”

A sudden gasp fell from Regulus’ lips and he turned around sharply. “Potter.”

“James, please,” he said as he stepped forward, “I thought we were past formalities.”

Regulus looked pained, “James—”

“Better,” he smiled down at him. Merlin, he was lovely. All soft skin, bright eyes, and naturally pouty lips. He couldn’t help himself, “You are so beautiful.”

The hitch in Regulus’ breath was visible as he turned his face slightly, “What are you doing here?”

“Seeing my favourite star.”

Pink dusted his cheeks and James resisted the urge to brush his fingers across his freckles. “That’s an awful line.”

“I thought it was quite good. You seem to like it.”

Miserably, Regulus closed his eyes. “You don’t even know what you’re saying.”

“Oh, love, I’m so sorry,” he said, anguished. “I should have told you the second it happened but I just wanted— I needed to have you for just a little bit longer.”

“What are you talking about?”

James smiled sadly, “Madam Pomfrey cleared me over a week ago. My memory is perfectly in tact.”

Wide green eyes blinked at him, “Excuse me?”

“The day you met my parents it all came back. I should have told you but then I realised I must have embarrassed you so much over the past couple weeks. Telling everyone you’re my boyfriend, being a dick to Rosier, making plans for the future… Merlin, I even told Professor McGonagall that we would invite her to our wedding.”

Regulus didn’t say anything. 

“I just— I know it was wrong. I should have told you. I never should have let it drag on but I’ve liked you for so long. Ever since second year you’ve had me hooked and these past three weeks have been the best three weeks of my life. Well, until I cocked it all up by pushing. I knew Christmas was too much, especially after you’d just met my parents—”

A hand covered his mouth. “Stop talking.”

Dutifully, James nodded. 

Regulus inhaled slowly, “James, if anyone should be apologising it’s me. You were confused and vulnerable and you were being so wonderful but you weren’t in your right mind. I never should have agreed to keep up the charade in the first place.”

“No! Please, don’t say that. Madam Pomfrey told me what happened. I almost fucking died because I couldn’t handle you saying no to me. If anyone is at fault here for— for coercing someone into a relationship then it’s obviously me!”

“That’s preposterous! You’d been hexed!”

“And you were only trying to stop me from having another seizure!”

They stared at each other in silence. Breath mingling, chests heaving, they traded a heavy look before they both surged forwards and their lips connected. James wrapped his arms around Regulus’ waist, pulling him impossibly closer, while Regulus’ hands crept up his chest to wind around his neck. 

The kiss was chaste, all things considered. Their lips moved together but their hands didn’t roam. They stayed close, both trembling and sharing in the moment. 

When they parted, he breathed out in relief and rested his forehead against Regulus’. The angle was a little awkward, and he was sure Regulus’ back must have been hurting from being tipped back against the railing, but it was perfect. Utterly perfect. 

“Well,” Regulus murmured, “I’ve been wanting to do that for a very long time.”

“Me too.”

Regulus huffed out a laugh, “We’re a sorry pair, aren’t we?”

“A bit, yeah. You aren’t upset?”

“Oh, I’m furious. Do you know how awful it is knowing I have Snape to thank for this?”

James shuddered, “Bloody hell, don’t remind me. He unknowingly gave me the best gift of my life.”

Regulus grinned, “Oh, I’m a gift, am I?”

“No, you’re a treasure.”

“I feel a little better, then. It’s going to drive him mad knowing he accidentally got us together.”

Now James was grinning, “Together, are we?”

The flush on Regulus’ face hadn’t faded in the slightest and he couldn’t help but nuzzle against him. Regulus giggled and weakly shoved at him. Feeling bold, he continued rubbing his cheek against Regulus’, delighting in the peals of laughter as he finally felt him up close for the first time in days. 

“Please never run away from me again. I can’t stand to watch you leave.”

Regulus panted, a hand raising to caress his cheek, “Oh, James,” he murmured before leaning up to kiss him gently. 

“Are we together?” He sounded truly desperate. 

Thankfully, Regulus seemed to suffer from the same problem of finding everything he did endearing as James. “Absolutely. You can’t think I’m foolish enough to let you go.”

“Of course not, you need me to get close to my dad.” He must have accidentally struck a nerve as Regulus’ face morphed in horror and he quickly said, “Joking, love. Only a joke. I know you, you have far too much self-respect to do that.”

“I’m a Slytherin,” Regulus said, “we do sneaky, underhand things all the time.”

“No, not when it comes to your education. You’re too clever and you like proving it through your own hard work.”

“How do you…”

“I told you, love, I’ve been a bit obsessed with you for a while.”

“Stalker.”

“Yours.”

“As you should be.”

“Oh, I am.”

“Good, because I’m yours too. And I don’t share.”

James smiled lovingly as he pulled Regulus into a gentle embrace. Resting his cheek on Regulus’ head, he sighed to himself as he realised that he could do this now. Whenever he wanted, because Regulus was his. 

“So, about Christmas…”

“Yes, Potter, I’ll come. I need to stay in your father’s good graces.”

James huffed, “I’m going to be competing with my dad for your attention.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, there’s no competition,” before he could smile, Regulus continued, “he already won.”

James scowled. 

“Only joking, my darling,” Regulus brushed his fingertips across James’ face, “I’m the real winner here. I’ve got you after all.”

James soared.