Chapter Text
Being friendly with Kara Zor-El was objectively the worst mistake Lena has ever made in her life. It is worse than deciding to hook up with Andrea in college. It is even worse than when she purposefully broke Ashley’s nose in boarding school just after the girl had recovered from her deviated septum operation.
No, nothing Lena has ever done was as bad as this. Because now she couldn’t turn back. Not a bone in her body would ever consider hurting Kara Zor-El. So, now she was sat here, in their tiny break room, having a nutrition bar lunch with the prettiest blonde she has ever laid eyes on and has a strong desire – need, even – to kiss said blonde, and the full knowledge that never could…
Crewmate relationships are generally discouraged and frowned upon for very good reasons. Reasons Lena completely agrees with. Because being in close confinement with heated emotions and no way to escape are not a good combination.
And yet…
Kara Zor-El has her questioning those very reasons.
“I don’t know why I keep forgetting how bland and bad these bar taste,” Kara bemoans, waving the dry and colourless item in question around, spilling crumbs all over the floor.
“I didn’t know how much I need dietary variation in my life. I could eat the same breakfast every day forever at home but this is next level. I can’t wait until we land again to get some real food. Anything. I’m desperate. I would even eat durian at this point,” Lena agrees.
Kara laughs, unbridled and with her warm voice. Lena could listen to it all day. Kara nods in agreement and counteroffers Lena’s durian. “I would eat raw kale.” She wrinkles her nose to indicate that this would be nearly the worst thing imaginable – just not as bad as the endless nutrition bars.
And, damn, why does that somehow make her even more attractive. Lena likes kale. There is no reason to be so enamoured by someone disliking a simple vegetable. That doesn’t seem to stop her heart.
“I would kill for a kale salad.” Lena’s mouth starts watering at the idea. “Imagine the textures, the flavours. Crunchy kale, crisp apple, tangy pomegranate seeds, silky feta and savoury walnuts.”
“I never imagined kale could make my mouth water, but Lena Luthor, you did it,” Kara beams, licking her lips and demonstratively taking the last bite of her nutrition bar as she pretends it’s a kale salad.
Lena smiles. She would make Kara happy – and finish her meal – any day. Pfew is she a useless lesbian.
“We should make a countdown calendar to our next real meal. Or even one to the end of this mission. I’m not made for long-haul, I think, and I might need some help to get through it.”
An idea immediately pops into Lena’s head. “We could organise an arts and crafts afternoon for the crew. J’onn did say we needed more teambuilding and that everyone had to pitch in to organise.”
“Lena, that’s brilliant!”
And so that is what they did.
Every day after their little event, they cross off a day together. Each time they reach a planet, they go out to find a good meal and both order something different so they can share and taste even more different things. Human and kryptonian nutrition being so similar is a real convenience.
The calendar is not all positive, though.
As more and more days get crossed off, Lena feels a sense of impending doom creeping up on her. She doesn’t notice at first. Not until someone else mentions that it would also be sad for this job to be over because the crew is so nice and gets along so well.
That night, when Lena closes her eyes and tries to sleep, it clicks. She has been getting irrationally cranky sometimes lately, a deep sense of sad stealing all of her joy. But it wasn’t the space sickness or a physical illness causing it. It was the knowledge that with their next meal, their contracts are up. Job done. Pay check received.
Thank you very much and until possibly never.
The days tick by. The jitters in Lena’s stomach grow. And one day she simply cannot hide it anymore.
“What’s bothering you?” Kara asks after they have been lying on the ship’s exercise room floor in silence for a while.
“Nothing,” Lena lies.
Kara fixes her with a stern stare, making clear she fully knows Lena is not telling the truth.
Lena shrugs.
“Is it something someone on the crew said or did? Because I will kick them in the shins with my steel-toed boots for you.”
Surprised, Lena lets out a short laugh. “No, no, that won’t be necessary.”
“Then what’s going on? You’ve been gloomy for days. Don’t think I didn’t notice.”
Lena sighs deeply, looks briefly at Kara and draws away her eyes immediately before she can lose herself in Kara’s blue ones. Kara looks expectantly, open and a tad worried.
Fine.
“I’m dreading this job ending because I might never see you again and I will miss you.”
“Oh,” Kara replies dumbfounded. Clearly, she had expected some other reply. Something she could solve, probably because Kara is always solving things. It is one of the things Lena noticed and appreciated very soon after meeting her. One of the things Lena loves about her, even.
Crap, there she goes again with her useless sappiness.
“We could just decide to stay in touch,” Kara suggests suddenly, still seeming to manage finding a solution. And such a simple one at that.
Lena raises an eyebrow because while it is a simple solution, it is also one she has heard before and that was always just as easily broken as it was made. “Really?”
“Yes! We could swear on it. Or pinky promise. I would miss you too much too to not reach out.”
Oh, now that stumps Lena. The gears in her head turn as Kara sits there with her pinky at the ready. Lena mentally shakes her surprise off and locks her own pinky with Kara’s.
“Promise.”
“Promise.”
Lena didn’t stop dreading the end of the job, but the dread was slightly more bearable. A little less heavy, now that Kara and she promised each other they would just keep in touch.
Somehow, she works her way through the remaining days and lets the last day creep up on her unannounced. Before she knows it, they are docking at their final destination.
All the cargo is unloaded, research data handed over, crew disinfected and checked. Before she knows it, they are all standing at the harbour exit with their meagre belongings in a bag saying goodbye to each other.
One by one, the crew members leave. By taxi, on foot, getting picked up by a family member or a friend. Until on Kara and Lena are left waiting.
“Nobody picking you up?” Kara asks.
“No.” Lena took this mission partly because it would keep her away as far and as long as possible from her family. According to her calculations, her closest family member is about five planets away and blissfully unaware of her existence.
And she doesn’t have any friends.
“You?”
“No. I didn’t tell my sister I was landing today.”
That piques Lena’s curiosity because Kara was always talking affectionately about her sister.
Kara seems to notice so she quickly rambles to clarify. “I thought we could have a meal together, if you want that too. It’s been a while since we had real food. But only if you don’t have any other plans and also want it. I don’t want to make you do–”
Lena doesn’t know if it’s the babbling, the blush emerging on Kara’s skin or the longing in Kara’s eyes, but the desire to kiss her become impossible to suppress. Lena drops her bag and puts her hands on either side of Kara’s face. Then she moves slowly to give Kara time to protest or pull back as she leans in.
She closes her eyes and presses her lips to Kara’s.
She kisses her.
Not too long, although she doesn’t want to stop. She makes herself; to check on Kara.
“Oh,” the kryptonian mutters, mouth agape.
“Sorry!” Lena blurts out, turning beat-red.
“No, no!” Kara cuts Lena’s attempted apology short. “Do it again. I liked it.”
“Are you sure?”
Kara takes Lena’s hand. “Lena, I’ve wanted to do that since day four on the ship.”
Lena lets out a giddy, strangled laugh. Apparently she wasn’t the only useless sapphic on board.
“Day three. Just after lunch,” Lena counters before closing her eyes again and leaning in for another, this time much longer, kiss.