Chapter Text
The sound of rustling bedsheets could be heard and a figure moving from one side to the other, changing positions while doing so. From resting on their side, to shifting to lay on their stomach until they eventually settled to lay on their back. Each and every time the mattres creaked underneath their restless limbs. But even then, after keeping their eyes shut for several minutes and concentrating on steadily breathing in and breathing out, the long earned tiredness didn‘t set in and they would again be shifting around in the bedsheets until the clock on the wall announced that another hour had passed. In the end blue eyes stared up at the ceiling, deep in thought.
Several more minutes passed until he groaned deeply and sat up straight. Rubbing his face, he couldn’t help but mumble a silent curse.
„Bullshit.“
This had been the seventh night in a row in which Jack had trouble falling asleep in.
The first two nights he‘d blamed it on the adrenaline and the close death experience he had made a couple hours before on said day. Who would blame him? After perhaps an hour or even longer - he didn’t really pay attention - and many times he’d changed positions in he’d managed to fall asleep. In other words it had not been that big of deal for the blonde, considering the fact that it had been a crazy day after all.
The next three days had taken him significantly longer to find rest. He once again tried to fix the problem by shifting around and changing the way he was lying on the mattress hoping that if his body would be comfortable enough he would be able to fall asleep. But no matter how hard he tried he couldn‘t drift of into the land of dreamers and shut off his mind as easily as he did the days before. Everytime he would close his eyes or stare at the ceiling too long his mind would start to wander. Until at some point the tiredness would finally overtake him and he would fall asleep. No harm done but he would feel the effects of the lack of sleep the days after.
Tonight marked the official seventh night and Gamma Jack was slowly losing his mind. This had also been the seventh night ever since the happenings of the mission. Oh, Jack had long given up calling himself crazy over and over again. He wouldn‘t be surprised if the lack of sleep had already made him crazy. Nonetheless, everytime he closed his eyes the same scenes started to replay again and again.
Everytime he would find himself back at the same location, levitating several metres up in the air where he would spot the exact car in the distance, rushing down the street. Him having no way of stopping the vehicle fast enough and him doing the first thing his mind screamed at him to do. And then he would find himself in the same position again, having his arms tightly wrapped around Gazerbeam with their faces only a few centimeters apart. And seeing the other man save his life just a few seconds after he‘d saved his. It had been too many things at once for Jack to handle.
He was far from being as invulnerable as Universal Man or even Mr Incredible.
If someone would manage to land a heavy hit on him his body would take quite the damage. Bruises and broken bones are nothing his superpowers would prevent him from and a bullet straight in the head? He decided not to think about it too much.
How could he have lowered his guard like that? Normally he had always been able to avoid getting into these kind situations where the breath he would have just taken would have been his last one. He never even dared to think about it too much but if it weren‘t for Simon Paladino in that exact moment he would be…no. He refused to think about it.
But that wasn‘t what made the past couple nights restless. It was the fact that holding the other man so close, feeling his body against his own while both of their heartbeats were beating like crazy both from the adrenaline and the fight, didn‘t feel so bad. It actually felt…nice. A little too nice.
He should have realized it sooner. The feeling the other man kept on causing in him.
It hadn‘t been new to him, he‘d just forgotten what it felt like. And that was what scared him so much. He wasn‘t supposed to feel that way. He wasn‘t supposed to like the feeling of holding the other man in his arms so closely to himself. Surely he‘d just hit his head during the mission and none of this was real and he wasn‘t just quest-ioning his own sexuality because of a man he‘d just met.
He was Gamma Jack, also known as Handsome Jack. A man of the ladies. He wasn‘t attracted to men and he surely wasn‘t attracted to that nervous smile, those icy-blue eyes, the calm and collected demeanor- he wasn‘t attracted to Simon Paladino.
He let himself drop back onto the mattress, staring up at the ceiling. Closing his eyes, he exhaled in frustration. That‘s when he looked over and his gaze fell on the telephone a few metres away from him.
Before he could stop himself he pressed the few buttons and held the receiver to his ear. He didn‘t spend one minute re-thinking the choices he had and the one he just took without a care in the world. Wether the lack of sleep had already made him go insane or him just simply being too tired to think rationally anyways. It was too late to withdraw now as he heard the well-known shifting noise at the other side of the line and before he could brace himself an oh-so familiar voice called out.
„Hello?“
The obvious tiredness in her tone wasn’t missed and Jack wondered once again wether this had been a good idea or not. There was still the option to just hang up like nothing‘s ever happened but that would make him look even more pathetic than he already thought he was given the current circumstances. He hesitated before he opened his lips with a slightly apologetic smile, even though the other person couldn’t see that.
„Hey, Sophia.“
Said person gasped and he knew that if she hadn‘t been standing before she was certainly doing so now with a furious look on her face.
„Jack, are you kidding me right now!?“,
She took a deep breath and the blonde hoped she wouldn‘t start giving him a lecture now like she did so often in the past.
„It‘s 1 am in the morning! Not everyone has their day off like you.“
The woman on the other line groaned and Jack could only imagine her rubbing her sleepy face in annoyance. His gaze wandered over to clock at the wall, watching the seconds making their small rounds when he looked back onto the ground in front of him.
„Alright alright, I know I‘m sorry, I just..“
His knee shifted uncomfortably and he bit his lip, unsure how to phrase what he wanted to say. The blonde woman quickly grew suspicious of that.
„Oh no, what‘s with that tone. What did you do?“, she interrupted him and Jack couldn‘t help but let out a betrayed gasp.
„Why are you always accusing me of having done something?“
„Because you’re Gamma Jack and that‘s why we‘ve broken up.“,
she was quick to answer and he closed his lips again. She had a point, but he didn‘t call her to argue about why their relationship didn‘t work out.
„Listen uh..“
„Come on, spit it out.“ She impatiently rolled her eyes.
„How do you know if you like someone?“
„Like someone?“, she slowly repeated, raising a brow with a slight smile on her face. Having the other man ask her how to know how to feel towards someone and having known him long enough was almost as unbelievable as Hypershock asking her how to open a bottle. Simply put, she wondered wether he was playing a joke on her or not.
The silence on the other line made Jack’s leg shake even more and he sighed.
„Like like someone, you know like—„
„Yes, oh my god, I know what you mean, but why are you asking me this?“
He slowly exhaled, unsure how to reply.
„It’s swear to god, if it‘s Helen then—„ His eyes widened.
„What—, no, oh my god. You think I would betray my best friend like that!?“
She shrugged her shoulders and then chuckled. „No, is it someone I know then?“
Jack gulped and then and sighed. „Yeah but—„
„Ugh, that list is long. Give me more details“, she interrupted him.
His eyes widened. „Nada, I called you for a friendly advise not for you to blackmail me“
„I would never blackmail you, who do you think I am?“, she gasped but then realized that she would indeed do that and waited for the other man to continue on talking.
Said person was still trying to find the right words, fumbling with his fingers.
„Just, how do I know if..“
„I don’t know, you‘re the love expert not me“ Jack grimaced, silently cursing her.
„Just be yourself, you flirt with all kind of ladies everyday. Just let your charm play. Just don‘t expect her to drop on her knees for you just because you‘re Gamma Jack.“
„Problem is, it‘s not a woman.“, he quietly mumbled but it was loud enough for the other woman to hear it and for her eyes to widen.
The other line remained silent for a few seconds. Said seconds felt like a decade for the super in which each second made the air less breathable and the ticking of the clock even louder.
„I know what you’re thinking, this is bullshit“, he sighed.
„It‘s not bullshit, I‘m just surprised, that‘s all. I didn‘t know you played for the other team or both teams, I don‘t know...“
„Please, don‘t call it that way.“ He couldn’t help but grimace. He prefered playing for the only team that deserved his attention.
„You know, it might not be that bad. You wouldn‘t be the only one at least. You know, Thunderhead?“
Oh yes, the only officially homosexual superhero, married to his roommate with five adopted kids. No he would rather not be thrown into the same pot as him.
„Oh, don‘t compare me to him.“
„Ugh fine, you get what I‘m trying to tell you. I know you well enough that I know that what‘s worrying you is your image, Jack.“
„I‘m not gay, Blazestone. I never even felt slightly attracted towards men, it‘s just…wrong.“ And he wasn‘t wrong. Homosexuality was still a sensitive topic in the current society and if the public were to find out he was if just by a little bit attracted to another man people would instantly have a different view of him. A view he didn‘t want them to have of him.
Sophia sighed, „Listen Jack, I don‘t think that suppressing it will make it any better for you, you know?“
„Oh wow, I never knew you cared so much about me?“, he teased while smiling and the the other woman couldn’t help but chuckle at his charming words.
„Hope you figure things out. Oh, and I will of course try to find out who it is. Goodnight, Gamma Jack.“
The last sentence had sound like a threath as she had hung up before the blonde could reply. He silently mumbled. „Goodnight, Blazestone.“, before being left alone with his thoughts again.
He slowly walked over to the trash-can positioned on the other side of the room and looked down into the insides of it. His eyes darted between documents and other scrambled paper works when his blue eyes finally spotted what they‘ve been looking for. They had long adjusted to the darkness and so it wasn‘t so hard to spot the crumpled piece of paper sitting between all the other things he‘d thrown away earlier on the same day. This little paper, however, was special.
Picking it up he remembered that after having done several interviews with the energetic crowd that day, he‘d excused himself to leave the scene when all of the sudden Gazerbeam wanted to invite him to a coffee. He had stared at the other man for a couple of seconds. Too baffled to be able to find the right words in that moment.
Not knowing where the sudden suggestion had come from but then it clicked.
This had probably been Simon’s way of trying to thank him for saving his limbs earlier. A bit tawdry but nothing Gamma Jack would ever say no to if it wasn‘t for who made the offer. He had sighed and told the other man that he unfortunately had some plans already. He was aware that he would eventually need to look for a new lie at this point but it did it‘s purpose and Gazerbeam dropped his gaze in an disappointed manner.
Jack almost caught himself thinking about changing his mind but he quickly shook his head. What he did then did surprise him, however. The blonde had turned around, given the black-haired man a sorry smile and suggested to go and grab a coffee another time. The way Simon‘s blue eyes had lit up in that moment had just been too winsome to look at.
He had turned around again, ready to leave, when the other super put a hand on his shoulder making him look at him with a raised brow. Simon quickly handed him a little piece of paper. It almost looked like something you would find in a news-reporters notebook and he figured that that‘s where the other man had probably got it from. Inspecting what was written on it the blonde‘s eyes widened. A phone number.
Jack had quickly thanked him and then left and once he returned back to his apartment was quick to throw it away.
Looking down at the quick and messy written numbers again and he couldn‘t help but scoff as he remembered what Bob had told him. You just need to get to know him better. As if that would solve all my problems.
He wasn‘t attracted to Simon J. Paladino and he would prove it.