Chapter Text
Severus leans over the desk and looks at the drawings, when he feels a hand on his back.
“What are you doing?” Charlie says, leaning against him, his hand running up to his neck and playing with his hair.
Without thinking, Severus leans back into the touch. It was easy getting used to their new dynamic.
“Cover designs,” he says, holding up one of the pictures, “I like this one.”
Charlie doesn't look at it. He gently tugs at his hair, pulling him back further. “And that's so much more important right now than having lunch… with… me?”
He leans over Severus and kisses him, and it's quite a lot different than that first kiss they shared under the apple tree.
His lips are soft but insistent, and Severus allows him to lean him fully back. Charlie's tongue gently tickles on his lips, and he opens his mouth, allowing him to deepen the kiss.
“Hmmmm…” he feels his shoulders relax, and carefully pushes back with his own tongue, being rewarded with a gentle sucking, followed by a passionate reply. Then Charlie pulls back and grins at him.
“Who could have thought you could be so pliant? That it takes so little to tame the dark, grumpy, nasty old dungeon bat,” Charlie says, his hands now massaging his shoulders.
Severus would love to give a snarky answer, but this feels just too good and he's busy not to just melt into a puddle.
“It's not like I knew. No one ever tried,” he says, closing his eyes in total trust.
“You're not telling me you've been a monk all those years, do you?” Charlie says, laughing quietly.
“Not… exactly. I did… try some things but nothing like this, not as in… having a relationship and definitely not with a man. It's not exactly encouraged in the circles I frequented, and I didn't even know that might be what I was into. Having something like this was never an option I considered,” Severus says, still enjoying the attention.
“Too busy hating yourself?” Charlie says, and he sounds a tad bit sad.
“Yeah, really stupid, I know,” Severus says, and hooks his finger into Charlie's collar, pulling him down. “I have lots of catching up to do.”
This time he initiates the kiss, his hand encircling Charlie's head, pulling him closer, and it lasts a full, wonderful minute.
“Hah, stop big boy, we have things to get done and a deadline tomorrow. But we could… see where this goes… tonight? In my room?” Charlie says, a tad bit breathless, and his eyes a little uncertain.
Severus sighs, then he smiles. Charlie has been hinting at wanting to take the next step for a while now, but he'd evaded the rather obvious invitations. It's typical for Charlie to finally say bluntly what he wants, letting him know that snogging sessions on the sofa are not the end of where he wants this to be going.
“Maybe,” he says, allowing himself to get lost in his lover's warm, brown eyes. “I'm… I'm just not sure what to expect. What you expect from me.”
During the past weeks they've talked a lot. Spent hours getting to know each other, and Charlie never pushed, never went too far. But it has become painfully obvious how stunted and socially awkward Severus really is. How he isolated himself from each and any contact with humans. Avoided relationships when he found out that women's interest in him didn't do much for him. How he'd chalked it up on not being over Lily and not wanting anyone who would stoop so low as to want him.
“We will take it slow, find out what we want, stop when it gets too much,” Charlie says, giving him a gentle peck on the lips before straightening. “Put those aside, then come out. It's time for a short break, then we'll finish the last revisions and then…”
Severus chuckles, and enjoys the faint tingling of excitement at the thought of finally taking things a bit further.
The day runs by like a fever dream and far too soon Tom is on his way to shock their publisher beyond expectation while dropping off the final copy of ‘Dragons in Modern Wizardry’.
After about an hour of excessive showering, fussing over the contents of his wardrobe, seven times changing what he's wearing and obsessively worrying about which preparation may be needed Severus stands in front of Charlie's door and can't bring himself to knock.
His hand hovers indecisively over the door when it opens and Charlie smirks at him.
“Your indecisiveness is so massive it seeps through the door. You may have already knocked. You made me wait for so long, I already wondered if you changed your mind,” he says, his boyish smile making him blush.
“I…” he peters off. What does one say in such a situation?
Charlie takes his hands and gently pulls him inside.
“You're thinking too much. Just relax. I won't bite, unless you want me to,” he says, before pulling Severus into a kiss.
Severus's breath hitches, everything he was thinking just moments ago vanishes in an overwhelming, hot desire.
He wants this. He wants this so, so badly. He puts his hands on Charlie's shoulders, drawing him closer. Then he feels him up. Charlie's body is all bulging muscles and stocky, sturdy manliness. He feels Charlie's happy moan against his lips, when his hands roam over his shirt.
Severus pulls back, and looks into his lover's glazed eyes.
“Can… can I…” he tugs at his shirt, and Charlie laughs.
“That's kind of the intent of this. Go for it,” he says, looking at him with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
Severus's hands shake when he slowly pulls the shirt over Charlie's head. And he gasps when he touches the warm, inviting skin beneath.
“Hmmmm…” Charlie leans into his touch, and Severus lets his hands wander, tracing the freckles on his golden tanned arms, and feeling the barely yielding muscles moving when Charlie raises his hands and carefully begins to unbutton Severus's shirt.
He swallows nervously, but lets it happen. This is the moment he feared the most. They are so different in everything, and he's convinced that Charlie can't seriously like what he'll find beneath the fabric.
Charlie seems to sense his hesitation, and looks up at him with a loving smile.
“Don't worry so much, Sev, you're a fine man,” he says gently, “I've waited so desperately to finally see you, to love you to the fullest. You are not ugly.”
The old nickname almost hurts, and he closes his eyes with a shivering breath. Then he feels Charlie's lips on his, and the dark dread of old memories dissolve. He leans into the kiss, allowing himself to get lost in the moment, to just feel, trust.
Soon Charlie's warm hands glide over his naked skin. Fondle his lean, wiry body, gently pushing the shirt off his shoulders before roaming over his back.
“Sheesh, Sev, there's no reason for hiding this. Your body is beautiful,” Charlie purrs, and Severus's eyes snap open, ready to face the mockery in the man's eyes.
But Charlie looks at him with admiration. His eyes are clouded with desire, and next he leans forward, letting his tongue trail over his chest, gently sucking on a nipple until it hardens.
“Haaaahhh! This… this is…” Severus leans his head back, falling, falling into the sensation, allowing Charlie to pull him forward, direct him while continuously licking and sucking on his skin.
He feels the edge of the bed hitting against his calves, then they topple into the soft blankets and pillows, laughing and immediately turning towards each other again.
“I still think your taste in men is questionable,” Severus says, but Charlie rolls on top of him, silencing him with another kiss.
His lips are firm but gentle. Severus opens his mouth, returning the kiss hungrily.
“Seriously Sev, there's no reason to be ashamed. You have a figure like a duellist. You don't need bulging muscles and a V-shape to be manly… or desirable.”
Charlie doesn't wait for a reply, he lets his hands roam over the sinewy, slim hips and the hard, lean angles of his ribcage while peppering his shoulders with kisses.
Severus has to admit, he's cared for his body's fitness and usability more than his overall appearance. He is a duellist, which means he trained for quick reflexes and durability, and that means also training for strength. But that is nothing against Charlie, at least in his mind, although he’s happy that he’s obviously fitting into Charlie’s preferences, and with every adoring kiss and nibble, with every quiet moan, he doubts his words a little less.
Then he feels Charlie's hands tugging at the waistband of his trousers, and he looks up into his calm, questioning face.
He has to think about this for a moment. Of course, he was aware that this is what this would lead to, but that didn't ease the disquiet he always feels at the thought of being exposed to anyone's sight. So far, he has no positive memory of getting undressed. It always ended in humiliation.
Severus licks his lips nervously, then he swallows. He can't do it. Not just now.
He puts his hands on Charlie's hips, but at the last minute, instead of pushing him away, he dips his thumbs into the waistband of his trainers.
Charlie smiles and lifts his hips a little, allowing him to push them down. Then he gets up and undresses swiftly, before straddling Severus again.
His penis is already half erect. Not small, but not too big either. Severus looks into his eyes while slowly reaching for it, seeing nothing but warm agreement and arousal in those beautiful, hazel eyes.
He shyly touches Charlie, feeling the smooth, warm and silky skin under his hand. Charlie leans his head back and moans wantonly. Severus swallows and decides that Charlie is absolutely beautiful.
“Haaahh, Sev. Please. Let me do it to you. Let me do it with you, together,” he says, and Severus almost melts at the pure desire and adoration in his eyes.
He slowly nods, and closes his eyes when Charlie's hands wander back to the waistband of his slacks. He tenses, and Charlie immediately stops, his hands on the fabric.
“Are you sure? You don’t have to if you’re not ready yet.” Charlie says and leans in for another kiss.
Severus calms down when those sweet, loving lips touch him. Peppering tiny kisses on his face, those strong hands gently teasing him, running over the fabric, fondling him.
He nods, and he gasps shakily when his trousers are pulled down. Waiting in silence, while Charlie takes in the sight. His heart beats heavily, and his head is full of fear. Expecting laughter and rejection
He startles when Charlie's hands glide over his legs, gently fondling his hips, and finally encircling his manhood.
“Haaaahhh!” he feels himself harden when that firm, pleasant grip begins to stroke him.
Charlie lets go, and then his strong arms pull him up, arranging his legs to encircle Charlie's sturdy hips, until they both sit upright, facing each other, Charlie's legs framing and supporting him, Severus's legs embracing Charlie's hips, and their dicks flush against each other.
“I think it's best we take this slowly,” Charlie says while massaging Severus's back, ”just getting to know each other, seeing each other, touching. We don’t have to do everything at once, there's more than enough time for more later. On another day.”
Severus nods and leans in for another kiss. Not resisting when he takes Severus's hand and guides it to their shafts. Severus takes both of them into his hand, Charlie's hand over his, guiding their motions.
Warm oil runs over his hands, over their joined members, and it feels heavenly. Charlie directs him to massage and pump them both.
He can't hold back a moan when he feels the friction of their dicks against each other, and the sound of Charlie's heavy breathing is like music in his ears. He leans forward and begins to pepper kisses on Charlie's shoulders, feeling a glorious pressure rising quickly, a hot surge of need rising in him, driven higher and higher by every little touch of Charlie's lips on his neck.
The points where their bodies touch each other feel as if they're on fire. A burning, immeasurable blaze of lust, that floods his whole body, his whole being to then concentrate on this one, amazing point. He's drowning in the sensations, feeling as if he has to run over, to feel overwhelmed, yet it's not enough at the same time.
Their hands intertwine at the connection between them, pressing and pumping in a grandiose rhythm, a crescendo of desire.
Their free arms encircle each other and Severus's legs pull them closer, chasing more friction, more connection.
“I love you Charlie,” Severus breathes, “I love you so much.”
Charlie moans and leans into his embrace, into their touch.
“I began to fall in love with you from the very moment I decided to stay,” Charlie breathes huskily. “I have loved you more with every passing day.”
Charlie's grip becomes firmer, and he directs a quicker pace. Severus moans, it's incredible, it's so intense, it almost feels unbearable. The pressure, the desire surges, and when he thinks he's going insane, he finally peaks.
“Ahhh!” A loud moan rips from his throat when he comes, the thrall of the most intense orgasm washing over him, swallowing him in a sea of pure bliss. Charlie's hand tightens a little bit more, and he keeps up the rhythm just a little bit longer, until he comes with a final loud moan, clenching their shafts together so firmly that Severus can feel him twitch against him.
They fall against each other and rest until their rapid breathing calms. Enjoying their touch and the afterglow of their first intimate moment.
This is the best thing Severus ever had. It is nothing to the shameful wrongness that tainted any other encounter he had, desperately denying his true self, his true desires, it is nothing like the pale, shameful masturbation and following denial of what he is and who he could love.
Then Charlie reaches behind him for his wand and vanishes the mess they've made, before unceremoniously shoving Severus onto the pillows before laying next to him, pulling him closer into a loving embrace.
“Yep. Definitely worth the wait. We're absolutely doing that again,” he says happily, before snuggling into Severus's arms. “And we'll see what else we can do tomorrow.”
Severus wants to say something witty, but it feels too tiring. Besides, he very much wants to repeat this again. This and more.
Oh boy, so much more.
“I love you Sev,” Charlie says sleepily.
“I love you too, Charlie,” Severus says, snuggling closer and tugging the blanket over both of them.
The warmth of Charlie's body lulls Severus to sleep, and the warmth of their love goes even deeper, following him into his dreams.
For the first time in his life, Severus is finally happy.