Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“So you just went ahead and did it…?” Scythe said, staring at Medkit with a mix of disbelief and annoyance.

Medkit barely looked up. His arms were full of blankets and a couple of snacks; he clearly looked irritated about being interrupted like this while he was on his way to his room. He already had enough to deal with after his boss spent the whole morning complaining about his pet… even though he had told her very clearly that he wanted to have one!! But of course, Scythe never took him seriously.

He felt lonely in the church… painfully lonely. Sometimes, when the silence got too heavy, he found himself missing the company he used to have in Blackrock. So, after thinking about it a lot (and also a little impulsively), he adopted a local pet from there. “Why not,” he thought. “Someone has to keep me company around here…”

When he brought him to the church, everyone looked at him weird… way too weird. Some even whispered, others stared at him like he was out of his mind. But honestly, what could they do? He was the only doctor there, for god’s sake!! If any of them got poisoned, broke something, or ended up unconscious, their lives depended entirely on Medkit. They could judge him, they could whisper, but they couldn’t stop him.

And in the end, none of it mattered. Medkit didn’t care what they said or thought. The only thing he cared about was his pet… his little, precious, beloved companion… He adored him so much!! Nothing in the church mattered more to him than that. Nothing.

“Yes, I did… I adopted him… and right now I have to go make sure he feels better. The poor thing still isn’t used to all this…”

muttered the turquoise-horned boy, adjusting the blankets in his arms. His expression was heavy with guilt and exhaustion; every time he thought about his pet trembling or disoriented, his chest tightened a little more. His eye, usually steady, showed a constant worry he couldn’t hide.

Scythe watched him in silence for a few seconds… seconds that felt painfully long. She didn’t know how to react. Her hands were clasped together, her jaw slightly tight, and her gaze kept shifting toward the wall, as if searching for an escape. It wasn’t that she didn’t care about Medkit, but… this topic was complicated. Deeply uncomfortable.

Deep down, it bothered her that he had taken such a drastic decision without properly talking it through… and even worse, that she herself had allowed it without fully understanding the consequences.

If she had known what he was going to do…

If she had imagined even a fraction of what it would entail…

…she probably never would have agreed.

But the damage was already done.

“Just keep in mind that Blackrock is looking for him… Be careful, Kit.”

she finally said, forcing a smile that never reached her eye. There was concern there, yes, but also fear. Fear of what it meant. Fear of what could happen if someone else discovered the truth.

Scythe turned around and left without another word. Her boots echoed through the quiet hallway, leaving the conversation behind as if she wanted to bury it in the deepest corner of her mind. Even so, the tension lingered, clinging to her back like a shadow.

Medkit watched her go, then sighed, hugging the blankets a bit tighter before continuing on his way. He was anxious to return to his pet… to make sure he was calm, that he wasn’t scared. That he understood he was safe now… or at least as safe as one could be under the church’s roof.

Everything was so uncomfortable…

Even those who didn’t know the full story could feel the heaviness in the air the moment Blackrock was mentioned.

Scythe was walking down another corridor when guilt struck her again. She had agreed too quickly, trusting Medkit… but she hadn’t anticipated the cost. And even though Medkit’s pet hadn’t caused any disasters or destroyed anything… the noise he made the first time he came in still echoed in her ears. She didn’t blame him. Not after everything that had been done to him.

If she had been lobotomized too… she would have screamed just the same.

The thought made her frown, a mix of pity and anger rising in her chest.

And then, inevitably, she thought of Subspace.

Poor Subspace…

“I’m here, Subby! Where are you…?”

Medkit said in a slightly brighter tone as he gently pushed the door open.

Subspace was lying on the bed, buried under a pile of blankets, staring at nothing… completely motionless. It was sad to see him like that. Even when he tried to think, his mind produced nothing but static… white noise, emptiness. Sometimes he didn’t respond at all; other times, he muttered vague things… and that was only when he actually heard something, because most of the time he was just dissociating.

“Mmh…” was the only answer Medkit received.

The turquoise-horned demon frowned a little—not in anger, but in sadness. He knew change was awful for animals… and Subspace was extremely sensitive to it. All of this had to be hell for him.

So Medkit set the blankets aside and sat down close to Subspace, moving slowly so he wouldn’t startle him, and wrapped his arms around him in a warm, steady embrace.

“It’s okay, Subspace… I’ve got you. We’re safe… Blackrock won’t hurt you again, I promise. I’ll take care of you… just like the old times…”

he whispered, gently brushing his fingers through Subspace’s white hair.

It was clear the touch soothed him; Subspace’s ears twitched slightly, and the light in his crystal softened, losing that tense flicker. For Medkit, seeing that tiny change meant everything.

A warm kind of happiness filled his chest—something he hadn’t felt in a very long time. He loved having company again… someone to love, someone who loved him back… someone who depended on him.

“Subspace… do you want to eat something? Come on, buddy… you must be hungry…”

the deer demon said, leaning in a bit to look at him, genuinely hoping for a response.

He had brought sweets and snacks Subspace used to enjoy before. Before all this, before Blackrock, before he lost so much. Back in Blackrock, he couldn’t taste anything… not really.

If he were still there, he never would have recovered that ability. But Medkit had used multiple crystals, spent days researching, nights without sleep… and finally managed to heal some of Subspace’s taste buds. It was one of his greatest accomplishments.

Knowing his pet could eat again… could taste again… could enjoy something… made him incredibly happy.

If he had known it felt this good to care for someone…

If he had known how much it filled his heart…

…he would have done it a long time ago.

Maybe… back when he first escaped… when things could still have been different.

Anyway… the doctor, wearing a calm smile far too comfortable with the situation, picked up one of the snacks: a pudding cup. He emptied it carefully into a small dish and grabbed a plastic spoon. Plastic, never metal.
Metal wasn’t good for Subspace… and if Subspace got hurt, he cried.
And Medkit hated hearing him cry.

It reminded him too much of how Subspace had first arrived at the church… confused, shaking, unable to process things properly. Medkit knew Subspace hadn’t liked what he’d had to do back then… but it was necessary. Some things needed to be fixed, even if they hurt.
But that didn’t matter anymore. All that mattered was that now everything was orderly… quiet… manageable. And most importantly: Subspace was by his side.
Right where he needed him.

The pudding was soft and sweet, perfect for someone who relied so heavily on him now. Medkit brought the spoon gently to the white-haired boy’s lips with almost ceremonial care. Subspace opened his mouth without resistance, without hesitation… simply obeying. He ate because Medkit fed him. He existed because Medkit guided him.

For the doctor, that dependence was… comforting.

When they finished, a bit of pudding clung to the corner of Subspace’s mouth. He simply flopped back onto the bed again, as if he didn’t understand they were done, or that he was messy.
Medkit frowned slightly.

“Subspace…”
He scolded him softly, like speaking to something delicate.

He leaned in and wiped the remaining pudding with his thumb, lingering just long enough to caress his cheek. It was hard not to remember the chaotic energy Subspace once had… that wild, unpredictable spark that made him unique. Medkit missed it sometimes. Just a little.

But if he wanted to keep him… if he wanted Subspace to remain his… then he had to behave.
He had to stay calm.
He had to keep functioning like this.

“Subspace, I need to fix the bed… go sit in the corner and wait.”

The command came out clear, firm, leaving no room for confusion. And as if pulled by an invisible string, Subspace registered it immediately. He stood up without a sound and moved to the exact corner Medkit had indicated, sitting there… quiet, docile, obedient.

Exactly the way Medkit wanted him.

While Medkit made the bed, Subspace simply watched. He tried to think about anything that wasn’t Medkit, but it was difficult. Being cared for felt good… yet something was wrong. Very wrong. A crawling sense of danger and sickness clung to him. Something had happened—he knew it—but he couldn’t remember.

He only knew that on the day Medkit took him to the church…

…he remembers nothing after that.

“Subspace, come here. Let’s get your pajamas on and go to sleep.”

Medkit’s voice cut through his spiraling thoughts, and Subspace obeyed, sitting on the freshly made bed. It was comfortable… too comfortable.

Medkit began by lifting Subspace’s shirt slowly, careful not to startle him. Back when they used to work together, Subspace always shoved him into the bathroom whenever he had to change. He almost never let Medkit see his scars. But now… Medkit was close to them.

It felt good—to him—to look at them, to touch them, to kiss them.

“Mgh… M-Medkit..!”

Subspace flinched when Medkit’s fingers brushed his chest. Medkit apologized softly, then continued with his task.

Next were the pants. It wasn’t a secret to anyone that Subspace was trans—he used to be very open about it for a long time. He was proud of having had his surgery, of living freely. And then he grew up, and it simply stopped being something he talked about.

To Medkit, though, it was… fascinating. Subspace had always been so private with him. Being allowed to be this close now—being allowed to really see him—filled Medkit with a warm, fervent affection.

He loved Subspace.

He loved this Subspace.

He loved his Subspace.

“Medkit..!”

Subspace complained again, this time because of the cold. How stubborn he was—even as a perfect little pet, he still demanded everything be done exactly the way he wanted!

Medkit finished dressing him. Subspace looked good in his pajamas. Medkit felt a gentle happiness bloom in his chest from seeing him so close, so quiet. Then he changed into his own pajamas. Subspace didn’t react at all.

By the time Medkit was done, Subspace had already curled up and fallen asleep.

Silly thing—he didn’t even wait for him. But Medkit couldn’t be upset. He was adorable… and Medkit loved him so much.

He laid down beside Subspace, first pressing a kiss to his forehead and lingering there for a moment before lowering himself to kiss his lips.

He loved him.

He loved having someone beside him.

He loved Subspace.

Chapter Text

The fight was finally over.
The Phighters were officially on “break.”

For the audience, that only meant 10 or 15 minutes of commercials…
But for the fighters, it meant two full hours to heal, breathe, and pull themselves back together.

Or at least, that’s how it used to be.

Ever since Subspace disappeared—one of their five supports—the workload had become heavier. And even though they still had healers available, things had gotten worse for one very simple reason:

Medkit refused to help.

The demon deer was distracted. Restless. Pacing back and forth like he just wanted everything to end already.
It was completely unlike him.

Even stranger was the fact that Vine Staff was furious.
The teal-horned demon was dumping all the healing work on her and barely doing anything himself.

Eventually, fed up, she decided to do something she never imagined she would do: talk to Scythe.
She didn’t agree with the cowgirl on basically anything, but she needed someone to tell Medkit to do his job.

“Hey, Scythe… look, I know it’s weird because I never talk to you, but… could you tell Medkit to at least make some effort?! I’m tired of being the only healer here!”

The pink-horned girl approached, frustrated. Normally she avoided Scythe at all costs, but she desperately needed a break. Or at least for both teams to stop fighting over her.
There were two healers, for Illumina’s sake.

Scythe gave her a sideways glance.

“Look, Flowers… it really ain’t your business. He’s still doing something, anyway.”

“Something?! He’s literally leaving all the work to me!” Vine Staff snapped.

Scythe sighed—awkward, uncomfortable.
Which was bizarre. The cowgirl never avoided a topic, never softened her tone, never acted tense.

“He’s just… tired. Recently, he decided to have some… company.”

Vine Staff frowned.
Scythe avoiding the subject was so unusual it felt unreal.

“Company? Like… a dog or something?” she asked.

Scythe stiffened a little more.

“Yeah. A pet, I guess. And it ain’t your concern. Just… do your job,” she said, abruptly cutting the conversation and walking away.

Vine Staff was left behind with few answers, but at least one idea.
Maybe Medkit had adopted a puppy… and didn’t know how to take care of it.

Poor demon deer.
Taking care of another life was a huge responsibility.
And animals could be demanding sometimes.

As the break was coming to an end, VineStaff had a bright idea.
When the matches were over, she would go talk to Medkit. She could offer him help with his pet’s care —maybe even find a place where someone could look after his little dog while he was fighting or working.
That would reduce his stress, Medkit would start cooperating again…
and she would have less work!

It was a perfect plan. Everyone won.
Now she just had to wait.

The fights for the day ended.
Everything was recorded and ready to air tomorrow.
They’d been paid, so everyone had some money in their pockets.

Normally, VineStaff would wait for Shuriken and Slingshot so the three of them could leave together…
but this time she told them to go on without her.
She had something to do.

“Medkit! Medkit! Hey, um, look, I know this isn’t usual but… I’ve noticed you distracted, and I asked Scythe. She told me you had some kind of company, and I know that can be stressful, so I came to help. I don’t know much about animals, but I know a few tricks! Shuriken had a hamster when we were kids and believe me, it was the cutest little—”

“I don’t want help. Thanks.”

The deer demon replied without stopping, trying to get away from her as fast as possible.
VineStaff froze for a moment at how cold he was, but she decided to persist. She walked beside him, talking with a soft, concerned tone.

“Hey, I know you’re very independent, Medkit, but it’s good to ask for help. Animals need a lot of attention and… I don’t know if it’s a dog or something else. Is it one, or is it a kitten? Or another animal? The Crossroads library has a lot of books about raising pets… maybe I could go pick some up for you and—”

She tried to get a little closer and touch his shoulder…
only to be shoved away, abruptly, almost harshly.

“VineStaff. It’s not your fucking problem what I do with my pet. And Scythe shouldn’t have told you anything. Just leave. I need to get home fast and check if he’s okay.”

The sharp, tense tone of the deer demon froze her in place.
Medkit didn’t talk like that.
He never.

When Medkit arrived at the church, he didn’t even stop to breathe.
He went straight to Scythe, furious, almost trembling, demanding to know why she had told anyone about his recent adoption. He said it was reckless, that she had no right, and worst of all—she told someone as nosy as VineStaff.

Scythe stared at him in silence at first, shocked by his audacity.
Then her expression slowly shifted—from surprise… to annoyance… until she finally had enough.

“Listen closely, doc,” she said, voice low and firm. “I’ve been patient with you. It’s true I’ve always kept a certain level of respect for you. But don’t you ever forget: I am your superior here.
I gave you time to get your little ‘friend’ used to living here. I haven’t given you difficult jobs. But I’m done with this… —she stepped closer, eyes drilling into him—. Come to my office. I have a task for you, and it’s going to last all day. Don’t worry, I’ll tell Broker to take care of your pet for a few hours.”

The criminal was tired—tired of the attitude, tired of the disrespect. And this time, she wasn’t letting it slide.

She dragged Medkit along with her, not giving him the chance to say goodbye to Subspace, or explain anything to Broker, or set any instructions. Nothing. She simply took him.

Medkit clenched his teeth.
He didn’t like this.
He didn’t like any of this.

Leaving his pet with someone else… what if they hurt him? What if they triggered a reaction? Subspace couldn’t handle another crisis. Another session would cause irreversible damage.
Permanent brain injury.
A vegetative state.

Medkit swallowed hard, feeling his chest tighten.

He could only hope he finished quickly. Very quickly.

Because Subspace needed him.
And he knew that better than anyone.

Hours. It had taken the entire day to finish that damn job. When Medkit finally notified Scythe that everything was done and he was allowed to leave, he didn’t waste a second—he bolted straight to the church and headed directly to his room.

The scene he walked into shattered him.

So… calm.

Subspace was sleeping, completely without pajamas, curled up peacefully. Next to him, Broker was casually going through Medkit’s things, looking like he had already fed Subspace and taken care of him. Subspace hadn’t needed him at all.

“Hey, Meds! How’d it go? Subspace behaved really well all day!”

Medkit barely greeted him—just a low grunt of acknowledgment—before motioning for Broker to get out. The moment the door shut, Medkit went straight to Subspace’s side and shook him awake.

“Hey, Subby—Subspace… I’m here. I’m sorry I left, I had things I had to take care of… I didn’t want to leave you alone—I just…”

He sounded desperate to explain himself, like he was spiraling, like he was locking himself into some corner of guilt and fear—

Subspace was confused. Medkit looked angry…? Sad…? He couldn’t tell. But whatever it was, it wasn’t good.
If he was fine, if everything had gone well—wasn’t that supposed to be good?
He didn’t understand. Everything was in order, so what happened… what went wrong… what—

“Did you miss me?”

The question slipped out, and before he could even respond, more followed—sharp, fast, cutting.

“Did you even think about me? Is this how it’s going to be? Subspace, I rescued you. I brought you here. Blackrock had no compassion for you. I saved you from them, I healed you, you’re better now—and you don’t even think of me?!”

Subspace didn’t know what to do. He was confused. Something had happened—Medkit was upset, Medkit wasn’t happy, and… was it his fault? He didn’t know.
Medkit grabbed his face, and the grip kept getting tighter, and tighter.

“I…—”

“Subspace, I love you. I love you so much, but you don’t even consider me? After everything I did for you.”

It hurt. His face hurt. His mind hurt. Everything hurt.

“…I’m sorry…”

“…Good.”

Medkit let him go. He didn’t speak to him for the rest of the night.
It hurt. He felt guilty, but he didn’t know why. Blackrock… Medkit said he rescued him—but from what? He couldn’t remember anything about Blackrock, and the little he did made his head throb painfully.

The rest of the night was silent.
Medkit didn’t even hold him.

He felt alone.

I’m sorry.

Chapter Text

“TRAITOR! COULD YOU JUST GIVE ME BACK MY GAS MASK AND LET YOURSELF GET CAPTURED?!”

Subspace was shouting, practically spitting the words in pure rage. His face was exposed; Medkit had ripped the gas mask off him and was now holding it casually in his hands.
He had no idea what the hell that deer wanted, but gods, Medkit was right in front of him—
With no one from that stupid cult to protect him.
This was his chance.
If he captured him, Blackrock would reward him generously.
He’d be allowed to do whatever he wanted with him.
He had basically won the jackpot.

Medkit, on the other hand, simply watched him. He didn’t move. He didn’t look worried. Every shot he’d fired had only been to tire Subspace out, not to injure him.
But seeing Subspace like this—rabid, violent, unpredictable…
It seemed he’d have to do this the hard way.

“I just want you to know this is for your own good…”
the deer demon murmured, voice soft enough to make Subspace’s blood boil.

Before Subspace could react, Medkit slipped on the gas mask he’d stolen…
And pulled out a crystal.

It didn’t look like his usual ones.
It was darker, murkier, unstable.

Subspace didn’t get the chance to analyze it.

Medkit smashed it against the ground.

A thick, greenish, sickly-sweet smoke erupted like a living wave, curling and spreading fast, swallowing the whole area.

“What the f— MEDKIT, WHAT ARE YOU— mgh…! DOING—”

He never finished the sentence.

His legs buckled.
His body dropped forward.
His eyes rolled back.
And he collapsed, completely unconscious.

Medkit caught him before he hit the ground.
He lifted him carefully—almost tenderly—carrying him away from the gas toward a safer spot.
There, he opened a makeshift backpack he had brought… and pulled out rope. Lots of it.

He paused, looking at Subspace’s sleeping face.
That vulnerable expression no one else ever got to see.

What’s done is done.
He wouldn’t be alone ever again.

Subspace woke up with a jolt.
That dream… that dream had been strange. Too vivid.
He felt it wasn’t a dream at all, but… he couldn’t remember it anymore.
Shit.
He hated these memory glitches. He hated the stabbing headaches that followed them, splitting his skull open from the inside.

At least Medkit was here.
Right?

He turned his head a little toward the deer. Medkit was still asleep.
Still ignoring him since last night.

The pain came back—sharp, unbearable, like someone was twisting a hook inside his brain.
“…Maybe…” he muttered under his breath.

Carefully, Subspace pushed himself up. His legs trembled like they weren’t fully working yet, but he managed to stand. He walked over to Medkit’s drawer and opened it as quietly as possible, praying the wood wouldn’t creak.

Papers.
Stacks of “important” papers.
Notes, diagrams, scribbled reminders.
A notebook with something written on the cover—furiously scratched out until the page was nearly torn through.

None of that mattered.
He wasn’t here to read.

Where the hell were his pills?

He sorted through the documents carefully, avoiding any noise. The pain was too much—he couldn’t tolerate it anymore.

But the pills weren’t there.

Of course they weren’t.
Why would anything ever be easy?

Subspace clenched his teeth as another burst of pain shot through his skull.
Medkit kept sleeping, breathing calmly, completely unaware of the torment Subspace was trapped in.
And Subspace just wanted that damn pain to be gone already.

 Just as he closed the drawer without making a single sound, Subspace held his breath. Medkit was still asleep, lying on his side, his brow slightly furrowed even in rest. His breathing was deep, but irregular enough to make it seem like he could wake up at any moment.

Subspace stepped back and scanned the room with cold, calculating eyes. Nothing in the room was out of place… except for the nagging certainty that Medkit was hiding something. Something he didn’t want to share. Something he didn’t trust him with.

Where else? he thought, frustration pulsing behind his eyes.
He checked the desk. Under the bed. The shelves. Nothing.

And then his gaze landed on Medkit’s vest.

Of course.
Of course he’d keep it on him.
Too responsible to leave it lying around, too stubborn to trust anyone with anything… even him.

But then, a realization hit him like cold water.

Medkit hadn’t even changed clothes.
He was still wearing his school uniform, wrinkled, the tie half undone, the patch slightly crooked. He had collapsed onto the bed the moment they got back, without saying a word.

He was exhausted.
Or furious.
Or both.

Whatever it was, he had fallen asleep like that.

Subspace muttered a quiet curse.
Of course this would complicate everything.

Still, he moved closer.
Slowly, almost ceremonially, a knot tightening in his throat with every step. He could hear his own heartbeat pounding as he leaned toward his target.

With a trembling—yet determined—hand, he reached for the edge of Medkit’s uniform pocket. The fabric was warm from his body heat. Subspace swallowed hard.

And there they were.
The pills.

His fingers brushed against the bottle. He could almost feel the label.
He tugged gently. A millimeter. Another. Another—

Everything was going smoothly…
…until Medkit moved.

Subspace tensed up instantly.
He let out a tiny, strangled squeak—barely audible, yet enough to trigger the demon’s instincts.

Medkit frowned, pushed himself up with a sharp breath, and opened his eyes.

His pupils focused slowly.

First he saw the shadow above him.
Then Subspace’s arm.
Then… the bottle in his hand.

Medkit’s expression shifted completely.

The sleepiness vanished in an instant; his breathing hitched.
His gaze moved from confusion… to anger.
A quiet, tense, devastating anger.

“…What are you doing?” he asked, his voice low—almost sounding like a threat.

Subspace felt the temperature in the room drop.
He froze, still leaning over him, hand caught in the act.

Medkit didn’t yell.
He didn’t jerk away.

He just stared at him with a look that said a thousand things.

Betrayal.
Distrust.
Hurt.
And something darker… something Subspace hadn’t seen before.

“Why…” Medkit clenched his jaw, “…are you touching my things… without permission?”

And Subspace, holding the bottle between his fingers, could only think one thing:

He was screwed.

The silence that followed was so heavy that Subspace could hear his own ears ringing.
He didn’t even have time to step back before Medkit shot upright, grabbing his wrist with a strength that made no sense for someone who had just woken up.

“Give me that.”
The deer demon’s voice was low, firm—icy.

Subspace tried to pull away, but Medkit’s grip tightened. His fingers dug into Subspace’s skin, holding him in place, marking him. The pill bottle shook between Subspace’s fingers, close to slipping.

“Let go of me!” Subspace snarled, trying to wrestle his hand back. “I just needed them!”

“Not without asking me.”
Medkit yanked him forward with a sharp pull, forcing him to bend.

Subspace lost his balance and crashed onto the bed, trapped between the mattress and the demon’s unyielding grip. He tried to scramble away, but Medkit was already above him, one knee sinking into the bed beside his ribs, cutting off any possible escape.

“You were digging through my things,” Medkit growled. “Without permission.”

Subspace kicked weakly, trembling. His brain was several steps behind what was happening; all he could register was being held down—pinned, controlled, overpowered.

“I just… it was hurting! It hurt so much!” Subspace squeezed his eyes shut, breathing fast. “I wanted it to stop!”

Medkit seized his other wrist and pinned it to the mattress with a quick, decisive motion.
Subspace let out a sharp, high-pitched yelp—more from shock than pain.

Medkit’s words cut through the tension, low and controlled:

“You can ask me for help. Not act like some wild animal trying to escape.”

Subspace barely had time to look up before the first slap struck him, snapping his head to the side.
The hollow crack echoed in the room.

He let out a sharp, automatic whimper, clutching his burning cheek.

The second slap came even faster.
Harder.
More direct.
More personal.

Subspace fell back onto the bed, dazed, his breath trembling.

“YOU LIED TO ME!” Medkit snarled, fisting the front of his uniform and yanking him halfway upright.
“YOU SAID YOU WOULDN’T SNOOP AGAIN!”

Subspace could only let out a weak, wounded sound, raising his hands in a useless attempt to protect himself. He didn’t fight. He barely reacted.
His body just flinched on instinct.

Medkit shoved him down again, smashing him into the mattress. Subspace bounced, gasping for air.

“Stop…!” Subspace squeaked, voice cracking—more reflex than a real plea.

Medkit grabbed his arm and shook him hard, as if he could rattle sense into him, force obedience, force understanding.
Subspace writhed weakly, unable to coordinate his body.

“It just… hurt…” he stammered, trembling, covering his head—
“I didn’t want to bother you!”

The demon slammed him against the wall.

A sharp, brutal thud.

Subspace collapsed to his knees, dizzy, catching himself with shaking hands before he hit the floor.

“And that makes it okay to STEAL?” Medkit yanked him up by the hair, lifting his face—
“From MY things?”

Subspace whimpered, eyes watery, body curled in on itself.
Small.
Submissive.

“I… I just… wanted the pain to stop…”

Medkit clicked his tongue in frustration and kicked him in the side. Not hard—
but enough to flip Subspace onto his back with a startled yelp, arms wrapping around his torso.

“You can’t do ANYTHING on your own,” Medkit growled, breathing hard.
“Not even that!”

Subspace trembled.
He looked like a scared, exhausted creature with no energy left to fight.
He lifted a hand toward Medkit—not to hit him, but seeking permission.

“S… s-sorry… I just… didn’t want you to be upset…”

Medkit shoved him onto his back again and climbed over him, pinning him with a knee against his hip.

Subspace froze.
Trapped.
Shaking.
Obedient because he didn’t know how to be anything else.

Medkit raised a hand—
Subspace squeezed his eyes shut, expecting another blow.

But the blow didn’t come.

Instead, Medkit grabbed his chin, fingers firm and unyielding, forcing Subspace to look directly at him.

“Next time, you ask.”
His voice was cold—colder than any strike.
“You don’t act on your own.”
“You. Don’t. Think.”

Subspace swallowed hard, lower lip trembling.

“Y… yes… I’m sorry…”

Medkit released him.

Subspace stayed perfectly still.
As if waiting for the next blow that never came.

Medkit pushed himself up from where he had been lying on top of Subspace. He was exhausted… but there was something he needed to do. He walked to the closet, searching through the shelves until he found a set of tools… and something that looked like an ice pick.

He knew the risk of doing this. He knew it meant causing severe damage.
But he couldn’t let Subspace do something like that to himself… he couldn’t lose him again. He couldn’t let him slip away like he had the first time he came here. That first procedure had been light—too light, apparently—because it hadn’t damaged enough tissue. Subspace had woken up, escaped, and they found him outside, ready to disappear entirely.

Medkit still remembered the words, sharp and panicked:

“I DON’T KNOW WHAT THE HELL YOU DID TO ME, BUT I SWEAR I’LL TAKE MEDKIT OFF THE WANTED LIST… JUST LET ME GO, MY HEAD IS KILLING ME—”

He had almost gotten away, and Medkit had only managed to bring him back because Broker helped. The memory made Medkit’s eyes sting; he hated this—hated it deeply—but all he wanted was for Subspace to be calm. To stay. To be safe.

This time… this would be the last time he did it.
This time… he would be careful.

“I just want you to understand… to feel it, even for a second: I love you.
I’ve loved you from the moment you came into my life. Before you, everything was cold… empty. Blackrock kept me chained, drained, forcing me to act as one of their precious healers. I wasn’t anyone. I had nothing.

And then you appeared.

Your smile… your laugh… even your reckless ideas. Everything about you poisoned me in the best possible way. Do you know what I did every night? I fantasized about escaping that cursed place just to be with you. I imagined a life where no one could touch us.
Where no one could take you away from me.

I even thought about… having a child together. Can you imagine that?
You, carrying my spawn.
I know—it sounds impossible now… but to me, it was perfect.

A home far from Blackrock.
Far from them.
Far from anyone who might try to pull you from my arms.

But of course… you can’t remember any of that.
And after this… you’ll remember even less.

Still… if there’s even a fragment of you left that can see me, that can still feel me, then listen:

I love you.
I love you with a force that tears me apart.
And I’m not losing you again, Subspace.”

Chapter Text

Scythe was resting with Broker as they walked through the halls of the church, chatting casually about anything and everything, until they heard it.
That scream.
Again.

“Gods… he’s doing it again…” Scythe muttered, visibly uncomfortable, a shiver running down her spine.

It still disturbed her how Medkit resorted to that every time he felt Subspace might leave him… or when Subspace began to recover… or simply whenever Medkit decided to.
He had even told her the risks of the procedure, yet he continued doing it anyway. As if nothing else mattered.

Broker watched Scythe in silence—the way her jaw tensed, the way she tried not to listen but couldn’t shut out the sound.

Concerned, he placed a hand on her shoulder and gently guided her away from the noise, though there was little he could really do; the echo carried throughout the entire church, bouncing off the walls as if amplifying it.

—

The surgery had finally ended.
Medkit was exhausted.
And terrified.

What the hell was he doing…?
His breath wavered, but he shook his head firmly.

It didn’t matter.
He wasn’t going to let Subspace leave.
Not now.
Not ever.

Speaking of Subspace…
The boy had passed out a few minutes after everything was finished. Medkit watched him quietly, his eyes softening. Asleep, Subspace looked adorable… fragile… perfect.

Gently, he began untying him, careful not to wake him. Each movement was slow, almost tender. Then he lifted him into his arms, pressing him to his chest as he whispered soft promises—little comforts meant only for Subspace to hear.

Medkit felt happy—genuinely happy—to see him calm again.

Maybe, if he behaved when he woke up, Medkit could bring him a gift.
Though… it couldn’t be from his favorite place.
Blackrock had increased its security, and they were still searching for them. The thought irritated Medkit deeply.

He knew Subspace would love something from there… but, as always, Blackrock seemed determined to make them miserable.

As always.

.
.
.
.

Medkit stood behind the door, silent, watching and listening as his superior scolded Tmine.
Sometimes the man even pinched him whenever he thought Tmine wasn’t paying attention.
Medkit hated seeing him like that—small, trembling, looking like he was about to cry.

When the yelling finally stopped and Tmine was about to leave, the superior said the one thing Medkit knew would break him completely:

“I don’t know what’s happening to you. You used to be exemplary—the pride of Blackrock’s future. Now you behave like a spoiled child.”

…

Tmine didn’t say a word.
He couldn’t.
He just walked away in silence.

Medkit followed him immediately, trying to distract him, to comfort him, to say anything that might ease the sting… but nothing worked.
Tmine didn’t react at all.

The moment they reached their room, Medkit watched him go straight to his bed—and then collapse.
He broke down, sobbing uncontrollably, crying so hard it tore straight through Medkit’s chest: choked breaths, shaking shoulders, raw despair.

Medkit wanted to comfort him, to hold him tightly, to protect him from everything…
But every time he took a step closer, Tmine flinched and curled up even tighter.
So he didn’t force it.

He simply sat beside him, listening quietly to his crying until Medkit’s own hands were trembling from helplessness.
Then he slipped off his shoes and lay down next to him, not touching too much—just lightly patting his back in soft, steady motions as if to say, “I’m here. You’re not alone.”

He hated seeing him like this.
He hated seeing the one person he loved fall apart.
He hated that they treated Tmine that way.
He hated Blackrock.

With every sob that shook Tmine’s body…
Medkit’s hatred only grew.

.....

Medkit remembered those days far too well. The regret clung to him like a second skin—how he wished he could have comforted Subspace better back then, given him all the love he deserved, wrapped him in warmth and reassurance instead of letting everything fall apart. Now he could. Now he had the chance to give him love, attention, everything he had once failed to offer. This was good. This was right. Taking care of him… maybe that was enough.
Maybe he should sleep for a moment…

.
.
.

The intruder moved silently; slipping through places unnoticed had become something of a skill. And this wasn’t only doing Scythe a favor—no, this was for the church as well… and for Subspace. He wasn’t sure if Blackrock could fix him, but at least he would be better off there than here, left as nothing more than an object. When he stepped inside the room, he paused for a moment, taking in the sight before him.

Medkit, fast asleep, arms wrapped tightly around Subspace.

Honestly, it looked like Medkit had been run over by a truck full of elephants—did he always sleep that badly?
It didn’t matter.

Carefully, he pried Medkit’s fingers away, inch by inch so as not to stir him. Once the demon’s grip loosened enough, he lifted Subspace into his arms. Lighter than expected. That made things easier, at least. Holding him securely, he turned and slipped out of the room with the same practiced stealth, leaving Medkit alone in the quiet darkness.

Chapter Text

NO ES ACTUALIZACIÓN POR ESO ESTA EN ESPAÑOL, MATT LARGATEEEEE FUERA DE MI FANFIC, DEJA MIS DELIRIOS MENTALEEEEEEES AHHHHHHHHH

LARGO, SIDA PARA TI, SIDAAAAAA ME VOY CON LOS NIÑOS

I'm sorry if I got your hopes up, but it was important, my bonito femboy uwu kawaii chiikawa adorable bebé pudin He must NOT see this fanfic,,.,.,.,.

Bay!

Chapter Text

It was the infamous mating season: that time of year when everyone seemed obsessed with buying gifts for their partners and pharmacies took advantage by raising the price of condoms. Medkit, as always, used to avoid all of that with his infallible method: contraceptive pills to suppress the natural order he despised so much.

But this time… this time he actually had a reason to let nature do its work.

Subspace.

The problem was that Subspace, even as an adult, still reacted exactly the same as when they were younger. Every time Medkit tried to get close in an intimate way—a brush of fingers, a kiss that lingered a little too long, a hand that searched for his skin—Subspace curled in on himself like a wounded animal.

He trembled.

Made those tiny, stifled sounds of discomfort.

Sometimes he even curled up into a ball or burst into tears without understanding why.

And Medkit hated it.

Not him. Never him.

“Subspace, dinner is ready.”

Medkit’s voice broke the stillness of the room as he pushed the door open with his shoulder. The air smelled faintly of clean fabric, plastic, and the sweet scent of one of the many room fresheners he used to keep Subspace calm. And there he was—lying curled up on his side in the middle of the bed, surrounded by a soft little fortress of pillows and plush toys. He looked like some lost creature nestled in the nest he had built for himself.

The TV flickered gently in front of the bed. At some point, the channel had switched to cartoons; now the cheerful melody of Care Bears filled the room. Pastel colors, soft voices, adorable animals teaching lessons about kindness and friendship…

Perfect.

Absolutely perfect for Subspace.

(Writer’s note: yes, I was actually watching Care Bears while writing this. AND WHAT? I LOVE THAT SHOW, LET ME LIVE.)

Medkit set the tray down on the nightstand and approached slowly. He ran a gentle hand through Subspace’s messy hair—just enough to make him twitch, but not enough to wake him fully. Then, with practiced care, he slipped his hands under Subspace’s arms and lifted him, sitting him upright among the pillows.

“There we go… up,” he murmured, using a softness no one else ever heard from him.

Subspace blinked awake, his eyes glassy and unfocused, like his brain needed a few extra seconds to boot up. Still, he allowed Medkit to guide him, obedient out of habit… out of conditioning… out of dependence.

Medkit scooped a spoonful of mashed potatoes with the plastic spoon, blew on it lightly to cool it, and brought it to Subspace’s lips.

“Eat.”

Subspace didn’t respond, just leaned forward instinctively like a little animal recognizing a familiar routine. He opened his mouth and accepted the food, chewing slowly, clumsily. A few bits dribbled down the corner of his lips, sliding onto his cheek and shirt.

But Medkit had already anticipated that.

With his free hand, he grabbed a napkin and wiped away the stray bits of purée with meticulous care, making sure nothing stained the bed or Subspace’s skin.

“That’s it… good boy,” he murmured, with that peculiar mix of affection and control only he could blend so perfectly.

Subspace kept eating without question, trusting, docile, as if the entire world were no more complicated than the soft texture of the purée and Medkit’s hand wiping his mouth.

And Medkit, watching him chew slowly, couldn’t help but feel that everything was going exactly the way he wanted.

He hated that reaction, that invisible barrier that separated him from the man he loved most. It frustrated him down to the marrow that every attempt ended up colliding with that deeply ingrained fear.

Because he wanted to kiss him.

He wanted to taste him—slowly, deeply—until Subspace forgot how to breathe.

He wanted to run his tongue along every scar marking his body, memorizing him with almost religious devotion.

He wanted to spread his legs, bury himself between them, and make him tremble for entirely different reasons.

He wanted to bite him, mark him, possess him until there was no doubt left about who he belonged to.

He desired him.

He craved him.

He needed him.

But Subspace wouldn’t let him.

He resisted with the same stubbornness he had in Blackrock’s hallways, when Medkit tried to approach and he recoiled like an automatic reflex. Just as stubborn. Just as impossible. Just as broken.

And that stubbornness…

that untouched purity despite the years…

that mixture of fear, vulnerability, and silent defiance…

Was exactly what drove Medkit the most insane.

Because the more unreachable Subspace became,

the deeper Medkit’s desire grew.

The fiercer the need became.

And the more unbearable the idea of not having him.

Normally, Medkit would’ve just dumped the pudding onto the plate and prepared some mashed potatoes for Subspace—soft, simple, the same routine as always. But today… today wasn’t a normal day.

As he mashed the potatoes, his eyes kept drifting toward the bag he had left on the table. Inside were the hormonal supplements he had bought in secret. He didn’t need them for himself—not this time—especially because Subspace hadn’t taken his routine blockers. Medkit had chosen every bottle, every dose, every detail with precision. He couldn’t afford mistakes. Not now.

Scythe and Broker had gone out to run an errand for the church, and the other members never really cared—or simply ignored the noises coming from his room. Some didn’t want to know; others were used to it. The point was that no one would interrupt them.

And that was perfect.

Medkit mentally reviewed everything he had prepared:

—Condoms.

—Pills.

—And a few rewards, sweets and little gifts Subspace liked, just in case positive reinforcement became necessary.

Because even now, even with his mind reduced to something soft and malleable, Subspace stayed stubborn. That same unyielding spark, almost childlike, still flickered deep inside him, refusing to go out. And that was exactly why Medkit planned every step with excruciating care.

He wanted everything to go exactly as he intended.

As it should.

He sighed, stirring the mashed potatoes with a steady hand as he imagined the night ahead: Subspace calm, obedient, accepting everything Medkit had been wanting for so long. A warm, anxious tension curled in his chest at the thought.

Everything was ready.

Everything prepared.

All that was left was for Subspace… to cooperate.

And Medkit was willing to do whatever it took to make that happen.

It happened gradually, almost too subtly to notice at first.

After they finished eating —with Medkit stealing a few bites from Subspace’s plate every now and then just to watch his faint reactions— both of them ended up lying on the bed, the soft glow of the TV filling the room. Bright cartoon colors flickered across the walls while the characters sang some ridiculously cheerful tune.

Subspace was calm at first. Half-asleep, half-distracted.

But little by little, he started to move.

First an uncomfortable shift.

Then a slight tremor in his legs.

Then his hands clutching the blanket, wrinkling it with irritation.

Medkit noticed immediately.

Oh, of course he did.

Subspace began to squirm, restless, uncomfortable —as if his own body were trying to crawl out of itself. His breathing grew faster, shorter, and his fingers slid down to the hem of his shirt, tugging at it like something underneath was burning him.

Until finally, he managed to say one single word:

“Hot…”

His voice was hoarse, weak, almost whiny. And without waiting for permission —not that he ever needed it— he clumsily pulled his shirt off, as though the fabric itself were scorching his skin. The moment it hit the floor, he was already fumbling with the buttons of his pants, desperate to get rid of those too.

Medkit watched everything with a barely contained smile, a soft laugh slipping from his throat.

Of course.

He knew exactly what was happening.

He knew why Subspace felt like this, what was triggering it, and how long he had been waiting to see that reaction.

And seeing him like that—agitated, vulnerable, unable to understand what his body was doing—was a delicious temptation.

Now it was only a matter of time.

Time before Medkit stopped watching…

and started acting.

Subspace tried not to look at him, as he always did, but Medkit started slowly to descend, leaving a trail of kisses until reaching subspace's crotch. He positioned himself between subspace's legs and began licking and biting the inside of subspace's thighs, subspace only able to let out whimpers and moans until a particularly sharp bite hurt... too much for subspace's standards. He let out a scream and started kicking and trying to push Medkit away.

Medkit, however, refused to be deterred. He continued his sensual assault, his hot breath and wet tongue leaving subspace trembling and breathless. Subspace tried to squirm away, but Medkit's strong grip on subspace's hips kept him in place, forcing subspace to endure the overwhelming sensations.

As subspace's cries grew more desperate, Medkit's touches became more aggressive. He groped and squeezed the sensitive flesh of subspace's inner thighs, his fingers digging into subspace's skin hard enough to leave bruises. All the while, his mouth never stopped its relentless onslaught, biting and sucking and licking until subspace was reduced to a writhing, incoherent mess.

Subspace's mind started to go blank, his thoughts scattering like leaves in a hurricane. The pleasure was too intense, too all-consuming. He felt like he was drowning, pulled under by the tidal wave of sensation that was Medkit's lustful assault. His body shook and jerked, muscles twitching erratically as he struggled to process the overwhelming stimuli.

Through the haze of his desperation, subspace dimly registered the sound of fabric tearing. He looked down, dazed and unfocused, to see Medkit ripping away the last of his clothes with single-minded determination. In an instant, subspace was bared completely to Medkit's hungry gaze, vulnerable and exposed in a way that made subspace's stomach churn with a confusing mix of fear and anticipation.

Subspace's heart raced as Medkit loomed over him, a dark and predatory figure against the dim light. He could feel the heat radiating off of Medkit's body, could see the bulge in Medkit's pants that spoke to his arousal. Subspace's mouth went dry, his tongue feeling thick and unwieldy in his mouth. He swallowed hard, trying to find some moisture to ease the sudden tightness in his throat.

Subspace's mind screamed at him to run, to flee before it

Subspace froze, his body trembling with fear and tension as Medkit tenderly stroked his cheek. He couldn't help but shudder when he felt Medkit's hand brush against his sensitive skin, his body betraying his true intention to resist. "Relax, darling... you're going to like it," Medkit whispered, his voice husky with desire, as he swiftly removed his pants. He tossed them carelessly across the room, leaving himself exposed and ready.

Subspace bit his lip hard, trying to stifle the panicked sobs that threatened to escape. But then him felt the first touch of Medkit's tongue on his vulva, and his whole body trembled with unexpected pleasure. Medkit began slowly, carefully exploring and stimulating the sensitive folds of his intimacy. His tongue slid along Subspace's inner lips, tasting and sensing his wetness. Subspace couldn't help but arch his back at the intensity of the sensation, his treacherous body responding to Medkit's touch despite his reservations.

Medkit began to focus on Subspace's clitoris, sucking and licking the swollen bud until it was glistening and throbbing with need. Subspace cried out, the sound muffled and strangled as him struggled to maintain his composure. Him was being overwhelmed by the sensation, his body and mind fighting to process the overwhelming pleasure Medkit was inflicting. Despite his initial resistance, Subspace's body was beginning to give way. His thighs parted a little more to give Medkit even easier access, his back arching slightly before Medkit's skillful tongue. Him could feel his insides beginning to throb and drip with excitement, his treacherous body preparing for the impending penetration.

Medkit groaned against Subspace's cunt, the sound vibrating through his flesh and sending waves of pleasure down Subspace's spine. Him knew she was winning, that him was softening up his reluctant lover with relentless, skillful pleasure. And despite himself, Subspace... Subspace could feel his body betraying his, his cunt throbbing and dripping with arousal despite his efforts to resist. Medkit's tongue felt too good, too adept at caressing and arousing every inch of his intimacy. Almost without meaning to, Subspace tangled his fingers in Medkit's hair, his grip tightening and loosening as him fought against the overwhelming surge of pleasure.

Medkit groaned again in satisfaction as he felt Subspace's grip on his hair, knowing his resistance was fading. He increased the speed and force of his licks and sucks, determined to bring Subspace to the brink of climax. He wanted to feel Subspace writhe and scream beneath him, wanted to hear his pleas for release and surrender. Medkit's tongue focused on Subspace's clitoris, licking and sucking the sensitive fleshy button as if he wanted to devour it. Subspace couldn't hold back any longer; his entire body shuddered as orgasm hit him hard. He cried out Medkit's name, his voice echoing in the room as his cunt contracted and throbbed around Medkit's tongue.

Medkit withdrew, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand as he watched with satisfaction as Subspace writhed in the grip of ecstasy. He knew he had won, that he had made his lover surrender to the lust they shared. And with a predatory smile, he positioned himself over Subspace, ready to claim his prize... 

His hard, throbbing member brushed against Subspace's wet, sensitive entrance, asking permission to enter. Subspace tried to resist, his body still tense and reluctant despite his recent orgasm. But Medkit gave him no chance; he simply thrust forward, burying his thick, hard member deep inside Subspace in one swift motion, filling him completely.

Subspace cried out, his back arching sharply as his body struggled to adjust to the intruder inside him. He was trying to escape. He shuddered violently beneath Medkit as his member buried itself inside him, his body fighting to adjust to the sudden intrusion. Medkit gave him no chance to recover, simply beginning to thrust wildly into Subspace, his cock hitting that spongy spot inside him again and again. 

"Fuck, you're so tight," Medkit groaned, his hips slamming against Subspace's buttocks with each thrust. "You squeeze me so tight, like you don't want to let me go.."

Subspace could only moan and sob with each thrust, his body shaking from the force of Medkit's pounding. Him could feel every inch of Medkit's cock rubbing and stretching his inner walls, his body being claimed and possessed completely. 

Medkit leaned down and captured Subspace's lips in a fierce, demanding kiss, swallowing his cries and moans. His tongue tangled with Subspace's, claiming his mouth at the same time his cock claimed his cunt.

Subspace surrendered to the assault, his body finally yielding to the overwhelming pleasure. He no longer responded to himself, simply remaining still. His hips rose to meet Medkit's every thrust, his body craving more of that friction while his brain just shut down.

 He could feel his second orgasm rapidly approaching, his body being hit by waves of unwanted pleasure. "Medkit..." Subspace whispered, his body convulsing beneath Medkit's as he seemed about to come. "I'm coming... I'm coming..."

Medkit groaned as he simply collided with Subspace's lips, his own orgasm hitting him hard. His cock jerked and shuddered inside Subspace as he came too, flooding his insides with jets of hot, thick cum.

Finally, with one last grunt, Medkit collapsed on top of Subspace, both of them gasping and trying to catch their breath. Subspace lay beneath him, his body weak and trembling, completely traumatized but satiated. Medkit knew Subspace would be sore tomorrow, but for now he could just enjoy the sensation of being inside him.

Medkit carefully exited Subspace's body, a satisfied smile on his face. He took a moment to contemplate Subspace, watching him lie panting on the bed, his skin flushed and covered in a mixture of tears and drool. Medkit couldn't help but think he looked adorable like that, so vulnerable and exposed. 

With a sigh, Medkit got out of bed and went to find clean towels. He began meticulously cleaning Subspace's body, removing the traces of fluids and sweat that covered him. He wanted to make sure his boy was comfortable and clean before going to sleep.

 Once he finished cleaning Subspace, Medkit helped him into his pajamas. Carefully, he dressed him in the top and bottom, making sure he was warm enough. Then, he guided him back to the bed and helped him lie down on the soft, clean sheets. After making sure Subspace was comfortable, Medkit lay down beside him on the bed. He could feel Subspace's body curl up against his, seeking his warmth and protection. Medkit wrapped his arms around him, pulling him even closer to his chest.

As they lay together in bed, Medkit couldn't help but be struck by a sudden thought. "Damn... the condom," he realized abruptly. In the heat of the moment, they had completely forgotten to protect themselves. 

Medkit felt a little worried about the possibility of unintended consequences. But then, a sly smile crept across his lips. Perhaps, he told himself, perhaps this was for the best. He didn't dislike the idea that there might be a lasting result from this. Perhaps, just perhaps, this was the fate he had been seeking.