Chapter 1: honesty
Notes:
✪ this fckn star now means verified bc i can't find the gd checkmark anywhere to copy it
Chapter Text
NHL Follow Tracker ✪ @NHLFollowTrack
👉 shanehollanderhockeyplayer (Shane Hollander) unfollowed 2:
✅ gilcomeau (Gilbert Comeau)
🔗 instagram.com/gilcomeau
✅ patrice.drapeau (Patrice Drapeau)
🔗 instagram.com/patrice.drapeau
NHL Follow Tracker ✪ @NHLFollowTrack
👉 haydpike35 (Hayden Pike) unfollowed 2:
✅ gilcomeau (Gilbert Comeau)
🔗 instagram.com/gilcomeau
✅ patrice.drapeau (Patrice Drapeau)
🔗 instagram.com/patrice.drapeau
NHL Follow Tracker ✪ @NHLFollowTrack
👉 jeanjboiziau (J.J. Boiziau) unfollowed 2:
✅ gilcomeau (Gilbert Comeau)
🔗 instagram.com/gilcomeau
✅ patrice.drapeau (Patrice Drapeau)
🔗 instagram.com/patrice.drapeau
shayden @haydenhollander
hey ... wtf is happening in montreal?
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
idk but if someone hurt my baby shane i'm not responsible for my actions
Chapter 2: waived
Chapter Text
NHL ✪ @NHL
Welcome to Tampa Bay!
Kicking off All Star Weekend with an All Star party before team practices tomorrow morning
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
Our C and A just touched down in Florida for All Star Weekend, good luck to Hollzy and J.J.!
Nos joueurs C et A viennent d'atterrir en Floride pour le fin de semaine des All Star, bonne chance à Hollzy et J.J.!
Pop Crave ✪ @PopCrave
Spotted in Tampa Bay: actress Rose Landry along with Montreal Voyageurs players Shane Hollander, J.J. Boiziau, and Hayden Pike
shayden @haydenhollander
... anyone find it strange that Hayden is in Florida even though he's not playing?
alice @hollanov
a shayden shipper reading into everything ... fork found in kitchen
shayden @haydenhollander
at least hayden and shane actually speak to one another, what proof do you even have?
alice @hollanov
how much time you got
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
i feel the need to be normal and point out that rose is there too
shayden @haydenhollander
shut up
alice @hollanov
shut up
Chapter 3: scott hunter
Notes:
the way i've just input like 100 names into a random generator and am clicking spin to come up with these twitter users...
Chapter Text
vivian @vivpeterson06
i'm staying at the same hotel as the NHL All Stars rn & someone tell me why i just watched shane hollander and scott hunter leave the bar together
vivian @vivpeterson06
they looked pretty friendly but i might just be crazy
gen @genevieve1998
someone check on hayden pike
Chapter 4: practice
Chapter Text
NHL ✪ @NHL
morning practice for Eastern Conference Team A #AllStarWeekend2017
NHL ✪ @NHL
team member @ilyarozanov would like us to tell you that their team name is actually Team Awesome
NHL ✪ @NHL
captain @shanehollander would like us to tell you to stop listening to @ilyarozanov
katie @katherineholt97
the rivalry is alive and well, boys. really compelling.
Levi @levicarlson25
Is Ilya Rozanov actually smiling? What have Scott and Shane done to him?
vivian @vivpeterson06
i s2g i'm not stalking him but shane is currently buying pike's kids ice cream
vivian @vivpeterson06
this is deadass the cutest thing i've ever seen
vivian @vivpeterson06
ilya rozanov is also here for some reason, couldn't tell you why
alice @hollanov
tell me why i just saw someone saying ilya was with shane and hayden
alice @hollanov
choosing to delude myself into thinking this is ilya's 'meet the family' moment
shayden @haydenhollander
i can guarantee that's not what's happening
alice @hollanov
ILYA AND SHANE SPOTTED POOL SIDE! SHAYDEN SHIPPERS GET FUCKED
Colin @colinmoore
i'm literally begging you to touch grass
Chapter 5: something real
Chapter Text
NHL ✪ @NHL
first up in our morning panels:
@NYAdmirals captain @scotthunter
@NHLBears captain @ilyarozanov
@VoyageursMTL captain @shanehollander
Luke @lucaskent
#freescotthunter
alice @hollanov
ig i'll take my content where i can get it
Micah @micahtaylor64
Is Scott Hunter being held hostage? Blink twice if you need help. #freescotthunter
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@lucaskent, @micahtaylor64 thank you for the concern, i made it through unharmed
Micah @micahtaylor64
thank god.
Chapter 6: all stars
Notes:
these are not real hockey players. i am making shit up.
Chapter Text
NHL ✪ @NHL
good morning & happy #AllStarWeekend2017 game day!
NHL ✪ @NHL
up first: Eastern Conference battle!
NHL ✪ @NHL
Team Hollander:
Shane Hollander (C) @VoyageursMTL
Kolton Acosta @BlueJacketsNHL
James Brophy @NJDevils
Alec Carr @DetroitRedWings
Scott Hunter @NYAdmirals
Henry McQuillen @Capitals
Lance O'Connor @NYScouts
Ilya Rozanov @NHLBears
Mack Shepherd @TBLightning
William Schaeffer @MapleLeafs
NHL ✪ @NHL
Team Vaughan:
Carter Vaughan (C) @NYAdmirals
Zane Boodram @Centaurs
J.J. Boiziau @VoyageursMTL
Lukas Meadows @BuffaloSabres
Justin Lewis @FlaPanthers
Tyson Adams @Canes
Jason McLeod @NHLFlyers
Colton Gaines @Capitals
Dallas Kent @Guardians
Cliff Marlow @NHLBears
crew @gopens87
idk why the other teams are even playing when hollzy's team is that stacked
mac @hockeyfan1992
Okay so Team Hollander is winning, got it.
@scotthunter ✪
photo of ilya on shane's lap, kissing his cheek.
@ilyarozanov finding new and horrifying ways to antagonize his enemies #AllStarWeekend 2017
@hollanov oh my god??
@hollanov i dare the shayden shippers to rationalize this one
@haydenhollander @hollanov scott literally said he's antagonizing him?? hayden kisses shane's head after every single game, this is literally nothing
@hollanov @haydenhollander you keep telling yourself that
@kt.williams @hollanov you are absolutely delusional
@colinmoore you've all lost your fucking minds
@NHL ✪
↻ repost 🔁 from @scotthunter
Team Hollander bonding after their Eastern Conference win, tune in at 7:00 EST to see them play in the finals!
shayden @haydenhollander
a dark day in the life of shayden but we shall persevere
Colin @colinmoore
i'm genuinely frightened of you people
Colin @colinmoore
idk what god i pissed off to end up with this discourse on my feed, but i'm doing what i can to repent
Luke @lucaskent
@colinmoore now that you're here, there's no leaving, trust me, i've tried.
Colin @colinmoore
@lucaskent i didn't have joining a cult on my 2017 bingo card but here i am i guess
Micah @micahtaylor64
welcome, @colinmoore, it's terrifying
alice @hollanov 🔁 NHL ✪ @NHL
i need to be put in a padded room i feel insane
NHL ✪ @NHL
Team Hollander celly for @shanehollander's fourth goal; a picture perfect one-timer off the assist from @ilyarozanov
vivian @vivpeterson06
DID THE ACTUAL FKNG NHL JUST POST A HOLLANOV KISS ON MAIN? WHAT IS LIFE
mac @hockeyfan1992
I am begging people to understand that a helmet smooch is a very normal celly
Colin @colinmoore
you'll get nowhere with logic, pal, might as well just join the chaos
Luke @lucaskent
welcome to the dark side, brother
alice @hollanov
join us: https://www.reddit.com/r/hollanov/
shayden @haydenhollander
wrong, join us: https://www.reddit.com/r/shayden/
mac @hockeyfan1992
teenage girls terrify me
mac @hockeyfan1992
... after further review i think i'm joining team hollanov
alice @hollanov
the correct choice. well done.
mac @hockeyfan1992
today has been a very strange day.
Chapter 7: down on that icy ground
Chapter Text
ava @hollander35
cannot believe the amount of people on my feed supporting hollanov after the all stars
ava @hollander35
this ship is just gross. why would shane ever be with rozanov when he so clearly belongs with hayden?
lily @lilyhollander1221
oh so you like being wrong? i see now why you are fan of pike.
ava @hollander35
@lilyhollander1221 what's wrong with hayden pike?
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollander35 how much time do you have? i will create presentation.
lily @lilyhollander1221
his only redeeming quality is that he is good friend to hollander
lily @lilyhollander1221
also he has cute kids and somehow landed jackie. other than that, he is horrible.
shayden @haydenhollander
@lilyhollander1221 he has more redeeming qualities than ilya rozanov, that's for damn certain
lily @lilyhollander1221
@haydenhollander i am sorry you have to live life being so stupid. i bet it is difficult.
NHL ✪ @NHL
puck drop here @TDGarden for @NHLBears v. @VoyageursMTL
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
HOLLZY GOAL
HOLLZY GOAL
HOLLZY GOAL
MTL 1 - BOS 0 | P1 07:23
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
marlow ties it up with a minute left on the clock in the first
BOS 1 - MTL 1 | P1 00:53
gen @genevieve1998
not to sound insane but the vibes between 81 and 24 feel ... different
vivian @vivpeterson06
no you're not insane something has shifted
Levi @levicarlson25
Shane Hollander is playing like this is game 7 of the Cup finals what is going on rn
ELI @elliot1999
ilya rozanov play a whole game w/o ending up in the sin bin challenge level: impossible
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
PIKE GOAL ON THE POWER PLAY
MTL 2 - BOS 1 | P2 15:08
shayden @haydenhollander
off the hollzy assist i know that's right
Levi @levicarlson25
roz out of the box and out for blood good lord
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
THAT'S OUR CAPTAIN!
hollzy picks up the puck at the center line and takes it straight down the ice solo
MTL 3 - BOS 1 | P2 06:23
Colin @colinmoore
through the five hole too. someone call for a wellness check on the bears' goalie.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
ROZ FROM THE GOAL LINE
BOS 2 - MTL 3 | P2 01:45
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
back on the ice, score sits at MTL 3 - BOS 2 with one period remaining
Levi @levicarlson25
watching Rozanov and Hollander battle it out like this is like doing a line god they're incredible
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
two minutes left on the clock, score remains at MTL 3 - BOS 2
ELI @elliot1999
holy fucking shit
Sean @sean.jensen86
Marlow came out of goddamn nowhere, clean hit but Hollander went down hard.
shayden @haydenhollander
of course hayden pike, who never drops gloves, immediately jumps marlow after he checked shane
Colin @colinmoore
now is so seriously not the time
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
oh my god please read the room
Colin @colinmoore
Rozanov looks shell-shocked I hope he's okay
Colin @colinmoore
This is genuinely scary & it's become pretty clear those two are friends
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
has anyone seen any updates on hollander? it didn't look like he was conscious when they took him off the ice
Colin @colinmoore
it looked like he might've been trying to talk right before they left so hopefully he's alright
Colin @colinmoore
but no i haven't seen anything more concrete
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
Game Final: MTL 3 - BOS 2
Sean @sean.jensen86
any updates on your captain?
ELI @elliot1999
and nothing on hollander ... starting to believe the rumors that something's been off in the MTL locker room
Levi @levicarlson25
I really don't want to speculate but it sorta seemed like only Pike and Boiziau were concerned when Hollander went down
ELI @elliot1999
@levicarlson25 also most of the 3rd line and 4th line forwards when the camera panned to the bench
ELI @elliot1999
@levicarlson25 those young guys seem to look up to Hollander, I can't imagine how scary it is to watch your Captain go down like that
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
We've heard that Shane Hollander will be kept overnight for observation.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
No updates on the specifics of his injuries, but it doesn't seem to be anything too serious.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
It seems Pike and Boiziau were both with Hollander, Boiziau has since returned to the hotel as the team is getting ready to travel
shayden @haydenhollander
and hayden's staying at the hospital with shane? not surprised
ELI @elliot1999
@haydenhollander READ THE ROOM BRO
ELI @elliot1999
and still nothing from the Voyageurs ... what is going on in Montreal
Chapter 8: broken and blue
Chapter Text
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
Sources say @NYAdmirals Scott Hunter and @NHLBears Ilya Rozanov have both made Captain's visits to Shane Hollander this morning
max @holla.nov2481
'captain's visits' ... sure
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
Still no word from the @Voyagers team RE: Hollander
NHL Trade News ✪ @TradeNewsNHL
Word is Hollander's No Trade Clause was waived sometime before #AllStarWeekend2017
Fletch @RyanFletcher 🔁 NHL Trade News ✪ @TradeNewsNHL
Odd to see this news breaking now ... makes you wonder what the Voyagers are planning
NHL Trade News ✪ @TradeNewsNHL
Word is Hollander's No Trade Clause was waived sometime before #AllStarWeekend2017
Fletch @RyanFletcher
News of Hollander's No Trade being waived coming out right after a serious injury may be cause for concern
Fletch @RyanFletcher
Tune into the podcast this Tuesday to hear our thoughts on what this means for Montreal's playoff chances & Hollander's future with the team
@shanehollander ✪
attached photos of Shane smiling in hospital bed, Shane pretending to sleep with Hayden passed out with his head against Shane's hip, selfie of Shane, Ilya, and Scott with Hayden, still asleep, just barely visible over Scott's shoulder
Thanks for all the love and support, I’ll be out for the next few games, but I’ll be doing everything I can to be back before the season ends. Thank you to the trainers and EMTs at @tdgarden and the staff at @massgeneral for everything.
comments on this post have been disabled
@scotthunter ✪ ↻ @shanehollander ✪
post shared to story: image of scott, ilya, shane, and hayden from shane's post
Happy to see @shanehollander alive and well. Heal up soon, Rook.
ruby @hollanderMTL
what do you MEAN hunter and rozanov are just hanging out in shane's hospital room?
alice @hollanov
... uh ... now that we know shane's fine can we talk about the elephant in the hospital room?
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
are we talking about the elephant by the name of ilya rozanov or the montreal voyageurs?
alice @hollanov
really any of the above works for me
gen @genevieve1998
do we think those three just started a 'we love shane hollander' club in the hospital waiting room?
ava @hollander35
i doubt they were in the waiting room, that feels more like a bed side activity
shayden @haydenhollander
blah blah hunter and rozanov captains visits blah CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE WAY HAYDEN IS HOLDING ONTO SHANE'S HOSPITAL GOWN?
shayden @haydenhollander
THAT IS THE GRIP OF A MAN WHO SAW THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE KNOCKED OUT
ava @hollander35
the way he immediately jumped Marlow? shane hollander u are a lucky man
ELI @elliot1999
hey ... uh ... @VoyageursMTL ... anything to say about your captain? shane hollander? u might've heard of him? won you two Cups? no? just checking.
Levi @levicarlson25
super weird behavior from them, honestly
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
hi i know jack shit about how hockey actually works but is there a way we can take shane and put him somewhere with people who don't suck?
gen @genevieve1998
openly admitting to knowing nothing about hockey while running a hollander fan account is queen behavior
gen @genevieve1998
also, yes, there's still time before the trade deadline. hollander could get traded this season but it's more likely they'll wait even though his no trade was waived
Colin @colinmoore
What @genevieve1998 said. Hollander is a franchise player, the type of player you want to keep however you can.
Colin @colinmoore
It'd be idiotic to trade Hollander right now when, without him, the team will probably barely grab the wild card spot, but something is distinctly off in MTL so who knows.
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
ty @colinmoore @genevieve1998 i appreciate the education i am slowly but surely learning the actual rules instead of just how to tell when shane does something impressive.
gen @genevieve1998
@shollander24 😂😂
Chapter 9: stay a couple more days
Chapter Text
shayden @haydenhollander
*screenshot of shane's ig post w/ photo of hayden sleeping w/ his head on shane's hospital bed*
they're husbands, your honor💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️💙❤️
lily @lilyhollander1221
they are not.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Tonight's scratches against New York.
mac @hockeyfan1992
...uhhh
alice @hollanov
Luke @lucaskent
The teenage girls of the internet rn:
vivian @vivpeterson06
this timing is ... suspicious
vivian @vivpeterson06
real talk tho: i hope rozanov is alright, not like him to miss a game
Chapter 10: to build a home
Chapter Text
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Tonight's scratches against Nashville.
alice @hollanov
because he's at home taking care of his boyfriend, right? RIGHT?
ava @hollander35
on the (very likely) chance that it's something that has nothing to do with shane hollander; hope you're okay @ilyarozanov
Fletch @RyanFletcher
Rozanov has been scratched for two games in a row for the first time in his career
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
It is confirmed that Rozanov is not ill or injured, Boston is releasing no further information.
Chapter 11: long live
Chapter Text
NHL Trade Alert ✪ @NHLTradeAlert
🚨TRADE ALERT🚨
Montreal has traded Shane Hollander to New York for Dmitry Alexsiev, Antony Doyle, and a 2019 4th round pick. #Voyageurs⚜️ #Admirals🗽 #NHL
Colin @colinmoore
oh my fucking god
Colin @colinmoore
is my team stupid??? real question. i'm genuinely concerned for their well being.
Levi @levicarlson25
I don't think I have the skills to react to this rationally
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
this is the best day of my life. no one tell scott hunter.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@luke15gillis I'm hurt.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter ... i feel like i just got caught sneaking out by my dad
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@luke15gillis For the last time, I am NOT old enough to be your dad!
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter you keep telling yourself that, old man
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis oh, Luke, we're going to be great friends.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
My life is over.
mac@hockeyfan1992 🔁 Scott ✪ @scotthunter
The Shane Hollander trade is so nuts it has Scott Hunter being dramatic on main
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
My life is over.
Micah @micahtaylor64
I'm not ready to process this normally so I'm running a social experiment: why did Hollander leave MTL?
alice @hollanov
new york is closer to boston than montreal is. you know who's in boston? ilya rozanov.
shayden @haydenhollander
@hollanov loud wrong buzzer
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov i like the way u think
shayden @haydenhollander
shayden broke up and shane needed space
lily @lilyhollander1221
@haydenhollander LOUD, VERY VERY LOUD WRONG BUZZER. KEEP HAYDEN PIKE AWAY FROM MY MAN.
Sean @sean.jensen86
Something has seemed OFF in MTL for awhile, I think hollzy finally got sick of it
Colin @colinmoore
@sean.jensen86 as much as it hurts to say: agreed. i hope he finds better in NY.
ELI @elliot1999
@sean.jensen86 not to speculate on other people's emotional states but hollander has seemed almost defeated recently. it sucks to see a player that good start to hate the game.
@shanehollander ✪
1. Shane, Hayden, and J.J. in home game jerseys & jeans, in their skates standing near center ice below their 2 Stanley Cup banners
2. video of Shane, Hayden, and J.J. leaving the ice for the last time
3. Shane w/ the 2015 Stanley Cup
4. Voyageurs w/ 2016 Stanley Cup
5. Shane & Hayden as rookies, post game looking tiny and adorable as they grin at the camera (very distinctly willmack vibes btw)
6. Shane, David, and Yuna. Shane in his suit w/ David & Yuna in matching Hollander jerseys after a game in Ottawa
7. Shane and Ilya in the face off circle during an unspecified game in MTL
8. Shane mid backswing, passing to Hayden
9. Photo of Shane's first goal his rookie season
10. Ilya & Shane on draft day
Montreal has been my home for seven years and I never thought I’d be leaving it behind. I have had the time of my life playing on this ice, for this team. I always imagined spending my entire career as a Voyageur, but sometimes plans change. I am incredibly grateful for the years I spent with this organization, with these fans and this incredible community.
Thank you, Montreal.
Love always, #24.
⚜️⚜️⚜️
Montréal est ma ville depuis sept ans et je n'aurais jamais imaginé devoir la quitter. J'ai vécu des moments inoubliables en jouant sur cette patinoire, pour cette équipe. J'ai toujours rêvé de passer toute ma carrière chez les Voyageurs, mais parfois, les choses ne se passent pas comme prévu. Je suis profondément reconnaissant pour les années passées au sein de cette organisation, auprès de ces partisans et de cette communauté extraordinaire.
Merci, Montréal.
L'amour toujours, #24.
Comments:
@haydpike35 Love you forever, Holly. Playing with you has been one of my life's greatest joys.
@jeanjboiziau Tu me manques déjà, Capitaine. Je t'encouragerai depuis Montréal.
@colinmoore I was at your first home game on Montréal ice. I was 12 and my dad pulled me out of school early. It was a week after my birthday where I'd gotten the Hollander jersey I'd been begging for for weeks. Watching you play for this city has been a joy. I hope New York treats you better.
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@haydpike35 ✪
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love you big time, holly.
this user has limited comments
@shanehollander love you more, Hayd
@jackiepike we miss you already, Uncle Shane. Love you always.
Colin @colinmoore
he's really leaving MTL.
ELI @elliot1999
I just know it in my bones that this is MTL's fault and Hollander is still a class act. That team has no concept of how lucky they've had it with him as their franchise player.
Landon @jeffersonlandon
has anyone considered the possibility that this is Hollander's fault?
Colin @colinmoore
no. only you because apparently you're clinically stupid.
Micah @micahtaylor64
@jeffersonlandon I know where you live.
Micah @micahtaylor64
@jeffersonlandon I don't, actually. But I'll find out.
ava @hollander35
@jeffersonlandon i am in ur walls.
ruby @hollanderMTL
can we talk about this picture? everyone say 'thank you, hayden pike'
ava @hollander35
no i think we need to talk about this one. this might be the best he's ever looked.
lily @lilyhollander1221
wrong. have none of you people seen this photo? i want to bite him.
ava @hollander35
@lilyhollander1221 ... where tf did that picture come from i have never seen it before
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollander35 he posted it?
ava @hollander35
@lilyhollander1221 i can nearly guarantee he did not
lily @lilyhollander1221
...oops
ava @hollander35
what does that mean?
ava @hollander35
@lilyhollander1221 HELLO? WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??
ruby @hollanderMTL
now why the hell does twitter user @lilyhollander1221 have an unseen photo of shane hollander
alice @hollanov 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
what is happening in the house of commons
lily @lilyhollander1221
wrong. have none of you people seen this photo? i want to bite him.
ELI @elliot1999
can anyone explain to me why hayden pike is posting about shane hollander getting traded like a dead wife montage at the beginning of a movie??
ava @hollander35
*taps mic* they're in love
crowd boos, one person stands up in the back of the room, "she's right"
it's jackie pike.
alice @hollanov
...i'm honestly having trouble defending this one guys
lily @lilyhollander1221
try harder.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 girl why do you have an unseen of shane
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov ... no comment
ava @hollander35
so just to recap today ... shane to NY, hayden posting about shane like they're fully married, and some girl named lily has photos of shane that have never been posted. anything to add?
Colin @colinmoore
You forgot Scott Hunter crashing out bc Hollzy and Gillis (NY's rookie) are already ganging up on him
ava @hollander35
@colinmoore tysm king
vivian @vivpeterson06
okay, wait, i thought they all called shane 'hollzy' why is hayden calling him 'holly'?? am i missing lore?
Colin @colinmoore
'Hollzy' is his locker room nickname but Pike tends to call him 'Holly' and seems to be the only one. Hollander calls him 'Hayd' while the rest of the League calls him 'Pike'.
vivian @vivpeterson06
@colinmoore and this isn't suspicious behavior???
ava @hollander35
@vivpeterson06 oh no, it absolutely is
Chapter 12: your eyes look like coming home
Chapter Text
maddie @evansmadeline
not to like totally hollanov pill or anything but: ilya rozanov spotted in the ottawa airport
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
bro why are you tweeting like gossip girl
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Rozanov will remain scratched for the next week. Our team has permission to share that he has suffered a death in the family. We ask that you please respect his privacy at this time.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Ilya, you're in the entire organization's thoughts and prayers.
alice @hollanov
okay well now i feel like a dick for making this about a relationship i made up in my mind.
Chapter 13: i'll make this feel like home
Notes:
this is just filler internet chatter that for some reason i think is funny bc this chapter in the main work is just shane and ilya being soft and in love in the hollander's house in ottawa
as a side note. i tried to find an actor or something to explain what luke gillis looks like in my head but literally all i can think of is will smith from the san jose sharks.
Chapter Text
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
hey dad (@scotthunter) when is my new big brother coming home??
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander can I give this child your phone number so he leaves me alone?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I literally asked you for his number yesterday and you said no
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter YOU DELIBERATELY KEPT MY BROTHER FROM ME? HOW DARE YOU.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
yeah, @scotthunter, how dare you? what kind of father are you??
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
No one told me that this was what it was like to be Captain.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
I think the people need to know that @luke15gillis spent our *entire* practice today following @scotthunter around asking him about @shanehollander
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
So you're telling me the kid has taste?
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@shanehollander please get to ny like yesterday scott's boring and i need a new best friend
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I am surrounded by enemies.
Micah @micahtaylor64
Genuine, actual, real question. When did Shane Hollander acquire a personality?
Sean @sean.jensen86
No one knows. This question may haunt us for all time.
Chapter 14: maybe it's all part of a plan
Notes:
some admirals shenanigans & back to twitter
Chapter Text
Luke Gillis' Phone:
Luke Gillis' Phone:
Carter Vaughan's Phone
Blake @blake98myers
i might just be losing my mind but im about 92% sure i just watched ilya rozanov buy 12 donuts in an ottawa tim hortons at 5:58am
Chapter 15: it's brighter now
Chapter Text
peteyyy @peterbriggs
k so i live in irvington (right next to tarrytown) and the giant house down the street just got purchased literally 5 days after hollander's trade announcement
peteyyy @peterbriggs
coincidence? probably. but let a guy be delusional.
Ryan @admirals1987
If there's a God out there, please let this delusion be true.
Ryan @admirals1987
🙏🙏🕯️🕯️shane hollander bought a house near tarrytown🕯️🕯️🙏🙏
Zach @zachariah.zach
the streets are saying hollzy bought a house??
Ryan @admirals1987
The streets are one guy named Peter but I'm choosing to believe him.
gen @genevieve1998
why do the straight men on my timeline care about shane hollander purchasing a house?
Colin @colinmoore
Generally if a player purchases a house it means they plan to stay in that market long term
Colin @colinmoore
Or, sometimes, they just want space for their kids or whatever but Hollander is unmarried & doesn't have kids
Colin @colinmoore
So people would see him purchasing a house as a signal that he plans to put down roots.
gen @genevieve1998
@colinmoore you are my favorite person on the internet.
ava @hollander35
@colinmoore seriously you are wonderful. you just appear out of thin air to answer the girlies' questions and never call us dumb.
Colin @colinmoore
@hollander35 why would I call you dumb for wanting to learn?
alice @hollanov 🔁 Colin @colinmoore
this is a man written by a woman
Colin @colinmoore
@hollander35 why would I call you dumb for wanting to learn?
Chapter 16: i only see daylight
Chapter Text
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
chat what do you do when u embarrass urself in front of ur idol. srs answers only.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
buddy this was two days ago. you need to move on.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@vaughan19 i'll never move on.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@luke15gillis why are you embarrassed? hollander called @scotthunter 'mr. hunter' during our rookie season. that is embarrassing.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov you are the bane of my existence.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander what!! it's true!
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander that was painful. Made me feel old.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter you are old.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@scotthunter you are old.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter you are old.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@scotthunter you are old.
Chapter 17: one last kiss, then catch your flight
Notes:
carter is ready for shane to be an admiral like rn
Chapter Text
Chapter 18: new york state of mind
Chapter Text
mac @hockeyfan1992
Can I get on my teenage girl bullshit for a second and say that maybe the people are wrong and maybe Shane Hollander has been with Scott Hunter all along?
Colin @colinmoore
My brother in Christ. I don't think I can handle another ship. I JUST got done learning about Hollanov and Shayden.
mac @hockeyfan1992
You're so right. they need a name.
Colin @colinmoore
That wasn't even sort of what I was saying.
ava @hollander35 🔁 mac @hockeyfan1992
did ... did we just get beat to creating a new gay hockey ship by straight men?
mac @hockeyfan1992
Can I get on my teenage girl bullshit for a second and say that maybe the people are wrong and maybe Shane Hollander has been with Scott Hunter all along?
↪shayden @haydenhollander
@hollander35 i fear we did.
kara @hunter21
new ship just hit the tl ... we need a name people. all of the options are horrible.
Colin @colinmoore
My turn to be educated. How do we create a ship name?
ava @hollander35
@colinmoore we usually just jam half of each name together like 'hollanov' is hollander & rozanov but kara is correct all of the shane & scott options are horrible
Colin @colinmoore
@hollander35 so, what, Hunder? that's painful. so is Holler.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Go for the first names girls, call them Shott.
kara @hunter21
shott might be the lesser of many, many evils. @hockeyfan1992 congrats, you're officially a fangirl.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Genuinely honored. Is there an official club I get to join?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
video opening on an empty hall, you can hear laughter and indistinguishable chatter, whoever's holding the camera turns the corner and the video focuses on Shane, Carter, and Scott. Shane has his head thrown back laughing, sitting cross legged on the ground with Scott laying on his stomach next to him, his right arm wrapped around Shane's waist. Carter is on Scott's other side laying on his back, he's straight up cackling, Scott's left arm is wrapped around Carter and he's laying about half on top of him just grinning like a mad man.
Good morning from Tarrytown, our Captains have lost it. #Admirals🗽
kara @hunter21
OH MY GOD SHANE HOLLANDER IS IN THE BUILDING. THIS IS NOT A DRILL PEOPLE.
ava @hollander35
i have never IN MY LIFE seen shane hollander laugh like that what is happening.
Levi @levicarlson25
Are we all actually entirely sure that's Shane Hollander?
Micah @micahtaylor64
...anyone else noticing that Hollander looks totally fine... like better than fine?
Sean @sean.jensen86
@micahtaylor64 I really don't think Montreal is going to be able to argue they got rid of him because he was going to spend too long on IR
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
this is why you show up early to practice, people
gen @genevieve1998 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
is this the rookie who's obsessed with hollander?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
this is why you show up early to practice, people
↪ Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@genevieve1998 yes.
shayden @haydenhollander
just saw the vid admirals admin posted ... i fear @hockeyfan1992 might've been onto something
Chapter 19: sunday
Notes:
the youtube link is to the chris evans puppy interview in honor of our stucky fanfiction father.
Chapter Text
@spcawestchester✪
photo of Scott and Shane sitting on the floor with Sunday climbing into Shane's lap and licking his face, Scott is smiling at Shane
Sunday found her forever home💛💛
Thank you to @NYAdmirals for showcasing some of our adoptable dogs in your captains' interview. Visit the link in our bio to learn more about adoption or how you can help our organization!
@colinmoore congrats @shanehollander!! She's adorable!!
@haydpike35✪ @shanehollander your nieces want to know when you're bringing the dog to visit.
@jackiepike @shanehollander your best friend (me) would also like to know when you're bringing the dog to visit
@katiematthews can someone explain to me why it looks like Scott Hunter and Shane Hollander are adopting a dog TOGETHER?
@machogan @katiematthews might I recommend a lovely website called Twitter. You will find your answers there.
@vaughanofficial✪ @shanehollander @scotthunter you two are dead to me. answer your phones and explain yourselves, cowards. i was in the parking lot doomscrolling!! i could've come with!!
@nyadmirals✪ ↻ @spcawestchester✪
shared photo to story
second slide with infographic on how to help Westchester SPCA
@nyadmirals✪
photo posted to main feed of Shane holding Sunday, showing off his jersey with Jackie Pike on FaceTime, the phone is being held by Carter and Scott is in the background in the middle of a literal dog pile
Captains' Interview will be live on YouTube an hour before puck drop tomorrow night!
@madi.lynn this is genuinely the best looking trio of captains in the entire NHL. they're going to win simply by out-mogging the other teams.
@admiralsfan72 How is it even fair for us to have a team good enough that our ALTERNATE CAPTAINS were the captains of their All Stars teams??? It's a good day in New York.
@zachjones Genuinely wondering if Marlow knocked something loose when he checked Hollander because that smiling man with a personality is not the Shane Hollander I know.
@machogan @zachjones, if so everyone say thank you Cliff Marlow because that man seems to be experiencing joy for the first time in his 25 years on this Earth.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander and I went on an adventure
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
'adventure' is such a fun way to describe you kidnapping me in the parking lot.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
WHY was i not invited on this adventure???
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@vaughan19 you left the building before Shane was done with meetings??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 come over and save me. Scott refuses to leave my house.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander you've gotta stop telling people that
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter no.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
tweeted while sitting directly next to me, btw.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter no.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Officially a dog dad. Say hello to Sunday☀️☀️
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
Seeing this dog on FaceTime was the highlight of my week.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial it's only Monday.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@shanehollander let me live, man.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
lock your doors, hollander, i am going to steal that dog.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov get your own dog??? Wtf.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
everybody wanted to know what i would do if i didn't win ... guess we'll never know
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@luke15gillis he has been here ONE DAY and you've already replaced me with him?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter let's be so for real, grandpa, there was never any competition
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis we need new insults, we can't just keep calling him old.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander you are so right, starting a shared note now.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander @luke15gillis you two are going to send me to an early grave
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@scotthunter "early" is a bit of a stretch
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@scotthunter you walked right into that one, buddy
mac @hockeyfan1992
The Admirals are really going to win the Cup this year on the power of friendship and Shane Hollander's dog alone.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Also probably by playing some really fucking good hockey but I feel like the friendship and the dog might play a major factor.
ava @hollander35
shane getting a puppy was not on my 2017 bingo card
ava @hollander35
...actually... y'know what? let's be real. literally none of this was on my 2017 bingo card.
kara @hunter21
can we PLEASE talk about the fact that scott and shane apparently went to adopt this dog TOGETHER??
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
girl what do you mean "apparently" there is photographic evidence
gen @genevieve1998
does anyone remember @vivpeterson06 saying they left the hotel bar during all star weekend together? or did i imagine that?
vivian @vivpeterson06
@genevieve1998 no that happened. watched it with my own two eyes.
mac @hockeyfan1992
I was joking this morning. I might not be joking anymore.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game day v. calgary!! check out our new mascot
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@NYAdmirals that is my close personal friend Sunny (middle name tbd) Hollander. where did you go and why did you take her away from me.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis Hollander is on his way back to the locker room with her right now
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@NYAdmirals thank god i was about to do something drastic.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
Just so the people know, by "something drastic" he meant calling @shanehollander repeatedly and leaving increasingly unhinged voicemails
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@NYAdmirals thank god i was about to do something drastic.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
And by "about to" he meant he'd already spent five full minutes doing it.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter DAD THEY'RE MAKING FUN OF ME
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@luke15gillis stop calling me dad and maybe I'll tell them to stop
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
... @shanehollander HOLLZY THEY'RE MAKING FUN OF ME
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
everything's fine guys, don't worry
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
buddy if you don't get back to this locker room w that dog RIGHT NOW
Matti ✪ @jallomatti
@shanehollander @scotthunter mom and dad come home the kids are fighting and i'm scared
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@jallomatti you are such a tattle tale
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
We left @vaughan19 in charge for five minutes...
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander i was on my best behavior. it's all breezy's fault.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis right. I absolutely believe that.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander 😇😇😇
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Also, @jallomatti, if anyone is mom and dad it's Scott and Bennett. I am not in charge of you people.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@jallomatti he's right. hollzy and i are the cool older brothers. don't insult my best friend by aging him up to hunter's level.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@vaughan19 I thought I was your best friend?
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@scotthunter you thought wrong.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
our captains playing w puppies for your viewing pleasure: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2dPogeNhEoQ
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
just as a side note, @scotthunter would like the people to know that they are ALL best friends. any comments made otherwise by his alternate captains should be disregarded.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I told you this in confidence, Christina. They are going to eat me alive.
Eric ✪@bennettofficial 🔁 Scott ✪ @scotthunter
In case anyone was wondering, Carter and Shane have been relentlessly teasing him for the past five minutes. Scott is doing a really poor job of pretending he's not entertained.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I told you this in confidence, Christina. They are going to eat me alive.
kara @hunter21
hey so i actually feel insane right now. i need 3-5 business days to process that video.
Colin @colinmoore
When they asked them about their favorite part of NY and Hollander said the people were so welcoming ... make fun of me all you want but seeing him happy makes me happy
mac @hockeyfan1992
No, man, I'm with you there. He's been such a gift to hockey it's so wonderful finally seeing what he looks like when he's actually enjoying himself. Can't wait to see him back on the ice.
alice @hollanov
someone please tell me i actually just watched shane hollander facetime ilya rozanov in real life
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
no that absolutely happened
shayden @haydenhollander
has anyone heard from @lilyhollander1221??? she scares me but i assumed she'd have something to say about this
alice @hollanov
@haydenhollander ur right. she has been suspiciously silent.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 are you alive.
lily @lilyhollander1221
barely. that video needed a safety warning.
max @holla.nov2481
did anyone else see ilya literally melt when shane switched the camera around to him holding sunday or have i officially lost it
lily @lilyhollander1221
@holla.nov2481 no i saw that too, that man is in love.
shayden @haydenhollander
hearing jackie pike call shane babe was something i didn't even realize i needed until it happened
shayden @haydenhollander
also shane showing her his new jersey like a kid trying on a back to school outfit? absolutely adorable. no notes.
ruby @hollanderMTL
they're family, your honor.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanderMTL a. change your username, b. you might be right (so long as you don't suggest shane is in any way romantically involved!!!!!!!☠️🔪)
ruby @hollanderNYC
@lilyhollander1221 a. thank you for the reminder, b. you genuinely terrify me.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanderNYC good.
Chapter 20: can't wait to go home
Chapter Text
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
hey @shanehollander can u plz respond to my text.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
mind you, he saw her 3 hours ago.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
this isn't responding to my text.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@shanehollander send the kid dog pictures he's actually pouting
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@greghuffhockey i am 19 years old. i do not pout.
Matti ✪ @jallomatti
@luke15gillis you do, though.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
📍 Brooklyn, NY
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander tell me you didn't let cliff marlow meet sunny.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis sorry bud.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@marlowofficial sleep with one eye open.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@marlowofficial you can sleep peacefully. i'll behave.
Chapter 21: hanging on holy days
Chapter Text
brett @brettnash
@ the kingfisher ... someone tell me why shane hollander just walked in here wearing a mcgill hockey sweatshirt with hayden pike's name and number on it??
walt @lancewalter
...isn't the kingfisher a gay bar??
brett @brettnash
@lancewalter yes.
shayden @haydenhollander 🔁 brett @brettnash
shane hollander in a gay bar in a pike hoodie ... likely place for him to be
brett @brettnash
@ the kingfisher ... someone tell me why shane hollander just walked in here wearing a mcgill hockey sweatshirt with hayden pike's name and number on it??
brett @brettnash
not to speculate but He is definitely here with someone
shayden @haydenhollander
@brettnash ... when you say 'here with someone' ...??
brett @brettnash
@haydenhollander i mean Here With Someone.
shayden @haydenhollander
@brettnash ... right.
shayden @haydenhollander
shane in a gay bar in a pike hoodie but at what cost
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
roz starting off strong 💪💪
BOS 1 - BNY 0 | P1 16:34
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
game start in toronto! follow along for game updates
le match commence à toronto! suivez-nous pour les mises à jour du match
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
ST-SIMON GOAAALLLL
BOS 2 - BNY 0 | P1 4:52
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
puck drop in LA!! we've heard some chatter saying 'west coast best coast'?? we're not so sure. check back later for more.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
BOS 2 - BNY 0 at the end of the first.
kip @kipgrady
📍the Kingfisher
max @holla.nov2481
i'm sorry, did ilya just say that he and shane made a bet that if he scores a hat trick he gets to post a picture of shane's dog in a bears jersey?
alice @hollanov
i believe he did.
max @holla.nov2481
the way that lowkey implies that he's already purchased a bears jersey for shane's dog????
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@holla.nov2481 didn't even think of that ... that behavior is suspiciously husband shaped.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GILLY GOAL! GILLY GOAL! GILLY GOAL!!
NY 1 - LA 0 | P1 13:07
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis beautiful goal buddy
kara @hunter21
@shanehollander, does this mean gillis is getting a sunny picture as a reward for scoring goals??😂
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@hunter21 it's solid motivation.
kara @hunter21
shane hollander just responded to me. i'm -
gen @genevieve1998
@hunter21 girl are you good?
kara @hunter21
@genevieve1998 not even a little.
ava @hollander35 🔁 kip @kipgrady
@brettnash is this him.
kip @kipgrady
📍the Kingfisher
brett @brettnash
@hollander35 ... i think so ... jesus christ teenage girls are scary
ava @hollander35
guys i think i found his ig ... bad news, he's really fucking hot.
shayden @haydenhollander
he follows shane AND scott??? and they both follow him back??
ruby @hollanderNYC
uhhh ... he also follows rozanov? and rozanov follows him back?? who is this Hot Man and why is he collecting nhl all stars like infinity stones?
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
MTL 0 - TO 0 at the end of P1.
vivian @vivpeterson06
did someone hire an etsy witch to place a curse upon these teams? if so, send me their contact info plz. they're beautifully effective.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Roz scores again! Beautiful assist from Hammersmith.
BOS 3 - BNY 1 | P2 17:08
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander i hope you have more puppy pictures because the kid just did it again
NY 2 - LA 0 | P2 18:53
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis Sunny says go Luke
ruby @hollanderNYC
idk what to comment on first. shane in a pike hoodie, shane at a gay bar, shane at a gay bar with Very Hot Man, whatever suspicious bet hollanov has going on, or shane being consistently active on social media for the first time in ... ever.
ava @hollander35
i'm personally stuck on shane at a gay bar with Very Hot Man.
kara @hunter21
@hollanderNYC @hollander35 obsessed w the fact that we know this man's name yet he's still being referred to as 'Very Hot Man'
ava @hollander35
@hunter21 he earned the title. that man is stupidly hot.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
aaaand a goal for Hammersmith!!
BOS 4 - BNY 1 | P2 11:02
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
scott hunter straight into the top shelf
NYC 3 - LA 1 | P2 3:19
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander does the captain not get Sunny pics?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NYAdmirals no. he knows what he did.
kara @hunter21 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
what does this mean and why does it sound like a threat☠️
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NYAdmirals no. he knows what he did.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
ROZANOV WITH THE HATTY!!
BOS 5 - BNY 2 | P3 16:24
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
@shanehollander i hope Sunny is ready to rep boston
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NHLBears I'm never making a bet with Rozanov again
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
picture perfect goal from #35
un but parfait de la part du #35
MTL 1 - TO 0 | P3 18:24
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35 here you go, hayd
ava @hollander35
did ... did hollander just interact with mtl for the first time since the trade just to send hayden a picture of his dog?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 3 - LA 1 at the end of P2
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
just as an update from the locker room: scott would like to remind shane that he didn't MEAN to train sunny to bark every time the @BuffaloBills score
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NYAdmirals no. he knows what he did.
Buffalo Bills ✪ @BuffaloBills 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
welcome to the #BillsMafia, Sunny Hollander
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
just as an update from the locker room: scott would like to remind shane that he didn't MEAN to train sunny to bark every time the @BuffaloBills score
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
St-Simon with his second goal of the night!!🎉🎉
BOS 6 - BNY 2 | P3 05:16
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
LUKE GILLIS SCORES!! FIRST CAREER HAT TRICK FOR @luke15gillis!
NYC 4 - LA 1 | P3 12:17
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis ATTA BOY
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
game final, BOS 6 - BNY 2
Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
game final, MTL 1 - TO 0
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@shanehollander this is not true. we already made a second bet. you can't take it back.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NHLBears I'm never making a bet with Rozanov again
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game final, NYC 4 - LA 1
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
first career hat trick!! such a crazy feeling, i'm so lucky to get to play for this team
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
thank you @shanehollander for sunny pics and the frankly absurd number of hours you've spent coaching me over the past two weeks. couldn't have done it w/o you.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis that was all you, bud. So proud of you.
next day
@ilyarozanov✪
1. 
2. video clip of ilya in the tunnel after the first period of the bears' game in brooklyn saying he and shane made a bet that if ilya scored a hat trick he got to post a picture of sunny in a bears jersey
@shanehollander lost ... again. at least his dog is cute.
@shanehollander @ilyarozanov, I'll win the next one.
see 534 more...
ruby @hollanderNYC
am i actually fucking crazy or did ilya post that picture FROM SHANE'S HOUSE?
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanderNYC i don't think you're crazy.
Chapter 22: bad blood
Chapter Text
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
home against boston tonight! stay tuned for updates 👍😄
lily @lilyhollander1221
@VoyageursMTL you will not be smiling for long.
Colin @colinmoore
I'm legally obligated as a citizen of Montreal to root against Boston. That said, I'm in full support of whatever blood pact Rozanov and Pike are forming at the center line right now.
Colin @colinmoore
Oh look, they've gotten Boiziau and Marlow involved. Someone's gonna die tonight.
katie @katherineholt97
cliff's smile skating away from pike and boiziau is giving ripper stefan
katie @katherineholt97
like ... montreal should be afraid
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
had to abandon my 'the game is starting' tweet to say, ROZANOV SCORES
BOS 1 - MTL 0 | P1 19:32
gen @genevieve1998
rozanov is currently serving
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
point Hammersmith
BOS 2 - MTL 0 | P1 11:47
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
aaaaand one for St-Simon
BOS 3 - MTL 0 | P1 05:14
Levi @levicarlson25
Did Boston actually just put up three goals in the first period?
ELI @elliot1999
@levicarlson25 yes.
Levi @levicarlson25
@elliot1999 right... okay.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
BOS 3 - MTL 0 at the end of the first
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
CLIFF MARLOW THE MAN THAT YOU ARE!!
BOS 4 - MTL 0 | P2 16:58
Levi @levicarlson25
Oh my fucking god did Marlow just knock Comeau out with one punch?
max @holla.nov2481
this is the hottest ilya rozanov has ever looked. shane hollander you lucky, lucky man.
ELI @elliot1999
Boston is out for BLOOD what is happening right now?
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
another one for rozanov.
BOS 5 - MTL 0 | P2 11:42
Levi @levicarlson25
Either I've lost my mind or Marlow just nodded to Pike after Rozanov's goal.
ELI @elliot1999
...I don't think you've lost your mind.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
back on the ice for the third against montreal, BOS 5 - MTL 0.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
ROZANOV HATTY, BABY
BOS 6 - MTL 0 | P3 19:46
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
oh my god? @ilyarozanov you are an icon.
BOS 7 - MTL 0 | P3 18:58
alice @hollanov
ilya rozanov what the fuck.
vivian @vivpeterson06
it's like he has a personal vendetta against Montreal
alice @hollanov
@vivpeterson06 more like he has a vendetta against montreal for trading his husband
ruby @hollanderNYC
anyone think montreal is regretting trading hollander yet??
Colin @colinmoore
If they're not, they're actually stupid.
Colin @colinmoore
Montreal, I love you, but what the fuck is happening right now?
Colin @colinmoore
@shanehollander come home the kids miss you.
Colin @colinmoore
Actually, on second thought, @shanehollander stay exactly where you are we don't deserve you.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
GOOOAAAAAAL HAMMERSMITH!!!
BOS 8 - MTL 0 | P3 09:37
ELI @elliot1999
Hey, @VoyageursMTL, are you alive?
Levi @levicarlson25
@VoyageursMTL found dead. Murdered by Ilya Rozanov and Cliff Marlow.
Sean @sean.jensen86
Jesus Christ Rozanov is about to score again.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
and one more just because he can. that's a five goal night for @ilyarozanov in case you were wondering.
BOS 9 - MTL 0 | P3 00:58
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
BEARS WIN. BOS 9 - MTL 0. READ IT AND WEEP.
Sean @sean.jensen86
Rozanov is smiling like the goddamn Joker skating away from Drapeau what the hell did he just say
Levi @levicarlson25
@sean.jensen86 who knows but that man terrifies me.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
hate to see hollander fans being correct. but we've gotta admit that this one got it right just this once.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@VoyageursMTL you will not be smiling for long.
ruby @hollanderNYC
...did the boston bears just quote tweet a hollanov stan account?
alice @hollanov
hey, uh, @lilyhollander1221, what is going on?
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov boston knows ball.
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
game final, MTL 0 - BOS 9.
Sean @sean.jensen86
@VoyageursMTL did y'all ever consider building a whole team instead of just relying on Hollander?? Genuine question.
Levi @levicarlson25
@VoyageursMTL yeah, as a follow up to @sean.jensen86's question, what the actual fuck was that??
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
no more smiling for montreal 😄☠️
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
game final, MTL 0 - BOS 9.
Chapter 23: i'll make a brand new start of it, in old new york
Notes:
i need everyone to know that harry styles actually tweeted about sott on march 31, 2017 which is the day this game happened in universe (based on the ny v. pittsburgh game from the rangers march 2017 schedule)
Chapter Text
Harry Styles. ✪ @Harry_Styles
SIGN.OF.THE.TIMES // 7.APRIL.17 //
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals 🔁 Harry Styles. ✪ @Harry_Styles
HOLLANDER.CLEARED.FOR.PLAY // 31.MARCH.17
Harry Styles. ✪ @Harry_Styles
SIGN.OF.THE.TIMES // 7.APRIL.17 //
gen @genevieve1998
did admirals admin actually just announce that hollander would be back on the ice by quote tweeting harry styles?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we did, yes.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hey, real talk, has anyone seen our captains? we lost them.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NYAdmirals where did you even get that picture?
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@NYAdmirals is this from the sochi figure skating prelims??😂😂
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@NYAdmirals we've done so much media together in the past two weeks and you choose this picture from THREE YEARS AGO? We're staying hidden.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@NYAdmirals they're in Conference Room B
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@greghuffhockey run.
ava @hollander35
this picture is absurd. carter is locked tf in on figure skating meanwhile shane and scott are stuck in some sort of yearning romance movie what is going on😂
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
First one to find him gets my undying love.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
he's in the equipment closet next to the locker room.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis you already had my undying love but take this as confirmation.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander 🫶🫶
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander after getting a full download on one direction lore from our media team
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NYAdmirals Christina. Why are you doing me dirty. This makes it look like I was annoyed.
amanda @amanda.mccall
as the person in charge of explaining the lore: can confirm he was NOT annoyed. he is actually now incredibly invested.
amanda @amanda.mccall
i'm actually about 90% certain this photo was taken as i was explaining to him that he's supposed to hate s*mon c*well.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@amanda.mccall thank you for clearing my name🙏🙌
amanda @amanda.mccall
in case anyone was wondering: @shanehollander and @luke15gillis are currently adding SEVERAL 1D songs to the locker room playlist.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
history is a banger and i refuse to be judged for saying that.
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
WHAT ARE THEY FEEDING HIM IN NY?? THIS IS THE BEST HE'S EVER LOOKED WHAT THE FUCK
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander getting a full download on one direction lore from our media team
alice @hollanov
i need someone to confirm that shane hollander has an EARRING in that photo the admirals just posted.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@hollanov yeah ... i'll confirm that. i'm a bad influence.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
just opened twitter on my lunch break only to find out that shane hollander somehow got hotter.
max @holla.nov2481
does anyone think carter vaughan knows what he just did by responding to a hollanov account?
rosie ✪ @roselandry
good luck tonight @shanehollander i'll be blasting the entirety of Four in ur honor🫶🫶
Jackie @jackiepike
the album mention feels ... specific
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@jackiepike
Jackie @jackiepike
@roselandry oh my god that boy😂
Luke @lucaskent
Idk what to do with this information other than tell the Twitter girls:
Luke @lucaskent
Currently walking back to my office from lunch & just saw Cliff Marlow and Ilya Rozanov with Shane Hollander's parents.
alice @hollanov
@lucaskent i don't even know how to begin processing that.
max @holla.nov2481
i -
alice @hollanov
yeah.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
first carter vaughan is responding to alice and now ilya is at lunch with shane's parents what the ACTUAL FUCK is happening
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY let's not forget that shane learned about one direction today and immediately chose FOUR as his favorite album.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov how long until he sees the hollanov fan edits set to 18?
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY i give it an hour.
lily @lilyhollander1221
didn't even know it was possible for him to get hotter. i was so wrong.
lily @lilyhollander1221
his hair?? did everyone see his hair?? i want to run my fingers through it and tell him he's pretty.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i also want to pull it in bed because i just KNOW he'd love it but that's beside the point
lily @lilyhollander1221
considering founding a religion in the name of shane hollander's earring.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@vaughan19 i hope both sides of your pillow are cold. you have done the world a great service.
lily @lilyhollander1221
feeling the overwhelming urge to lick his face. maybe bite his neck. we'll see.
lily @lilyhollander1221
coming back to the hair for a second:
lily @lilyhollander1221
please, someone, keep that man away from scissors. i swear to god if he cuts his hair short again i'm going to light something on fire.
lily @lilyhollander1221
the little swoop? you killed me, hollander. i am dead.
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i'm going to marry this man i hope you all know that.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander getting a full download on one direction lore from our media team
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@lilyhollander1221 then I hope you're prepared to parent a 19 year old child because @luke15gillis is doing his absolute best to get adopted right now
lily @lilyhollander1221
@greghuffhockey i'll do what i have to do.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NY Admirals Alternate Captain Shane Hollander is officially on the ice for the first time #Admirals🗽
ava @hollander35
the way the entire stadium is cheering for him for WARM UPS? crying real tears.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane Hollander working miracles already; the puck drops ON TIME!!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
HOLLZY'S FIRST GOAL AS AN ADMIRAL💙❤️🗽
NYC 1 - PGH 0 | P1 17:58
shayden @haydenhollander
there's no way in hell i just watched shane hollander score and then immediately blow a kiss to hayden pike i must be hallucinating
gen @genevieve1998
if you're hallucinating, then so am i.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
ADMIRALS WIN | NYC 3 - PGH 1
Chapter 24: don't get sad, get even
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game Final | NYC 4 - PHI 3
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game Final | NYC 2 - DC 1
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game Final | NYC 3 - OTT 0
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game Final | NYC 3 - PGH 2
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game One of Playoffs @ Home v. Montreal this Wednesday!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the kid has arrived @luke15gillis
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hollzy's here @shanehollander
lily @lilyhollander1221
jesus fucking christ.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i need to sit down.
lily @lilyhollander1221
starting a cult to worship shane hollander's freckles and back arch. i am not recruiting members. it will just be me. i do not share.
alice @hollanov
the freckles i get (the pic ny just posted is 🥵🥵) but how tf did his back arch even come up
lily @lilyhollander1221
i just remembered it and decided something needed to be said
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
this may just be a new @vaughan19 and @shanehollander record, well done boys.
*video of Shane and Carter playing keepie uppie while the crowd chants, counting for them. Breezy and Luke are visible in the background, stretching and egging them on*
ruby @hollanderNYC
every time i see shane smiling i'm shocked which i'm just now realizing is deeply concerning
max @holla.nov2481
the shane and carter bestieism is not something i ever expected but i need it to continue
Colin @colinmoore
Go Montreal, I guess, but mainly go @shanehollander
Colin @colinmoore
No one call me a fake fan. I'm sick of Montreal and I don't want to talk about it.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
see u in 5 for puck drop
*video of Coach Murdock reading the lines, the locker room is SUPER rowdy by the time he gets to the first line forwards (Scott, Carter, & Shane)*
Colin @colinmoore
Montreal is about to get the shit kicked out of them aren't they?
ava @hollander35
@colinmoore are u okay?
Colin @colinmoore
@hollander35 who knows.
brett @brettnash
shane hollander genuinely looks like he's about to kill a man
max @holla.nov2481
fingers crossed it's comeau🤞🤞
brett @brettnash
@holla.nov2481 wait what's the lore?
max @holla.nov2481
@brettnash idk man his face just pisses me off
brett @brettnash
@holla.nov2481 ...fair
brett @brettnash
@holla.nov2481 hoe is u psychic
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
19:45 on the clock in the first, Montreal's Gilbert Comeau given a 5 min major for charging & a match penalty for checking from behind and attempt to injure
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
Comeau has been escorted off the ice, Montreal's Wilson pulled to serve the five minute penalty.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
@NYAdmirals on the power play
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hollzy to scotty for point number one!!
our captain with the first playoff goal of the season💙❤️🗽
NYC 1 - MTL 0 | P1 19:15
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
aaaand that's a hollzy goal!!
NYC 2 - MTL 0 | P1 15:46
Colin @colinmoore
Jesus that was a beautiful goal. Backhand?? Shane Hollander? What is even happening right now.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
HOLLANDER AGAIN🔥🔥
NYC 3 - MTL 0 | P1 08:32
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
LUKE GILLIS! FIRST PLAYOFF GOAL IN THE FIRST PERIOD OF HIS FIRST PLAYOFF GAME!!!
NYC 4 - MTL 0 | P1 05:12
gen @genevieve1998
the way he immediately sat next to shane when his shift got pulled off they are best friends i love them
mac @hockeyfan1992
@genevieve1998 this kid somehow just manifested shane hollander as his best friend and it WORKED
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 4 - MTL 0 at the end of the first
kara @hunter21
i think montreal is actively trying to kill shane hollander wtf is happening rn
mac @hockeyfan1992
New York isn't even fighting back. Montreal is literally just racking up penalty minutes for nothing😂
ruby @hollanderNYC
not to sound entirely insane but is that Very Hot Man sitting directly in front of shane hollander's parents?
kara @hunter21
@hollanderNYC omg you're right wtf is happening
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
did anyone see the speed on that guy?? BREEZY GOAL!
NYC 5 - MTL 0 | P2 0:43
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 5 - MTL 0 at the end of the second!! see u soon for the third :)
kara @hunter21
i'm just imagining admirals admin sitting somewhere cackling like a villain as they live tweet this game
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
VAUGHNY, BABY, WHAT A GOAL. HOLLZY, MY LOVE, WONDERFUL ASSIST.
NYC 6 - MTL 0 | P3 10:27
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
AND VAUGHNY RETURNS THE FAVOR FOR A HOLLZY HATTY!!
NYC 7 - MTL 0 | P3 10:12
Colin @colinmoore
Carter Vaughan and Shane Hollander, apparently.
kara @hunter21
@colinmoore buddy, Ilya Rozanov and Cliff Marlow both just retweeted this.
Colin @colinmoore
@hunter21 right. Okay. I think I'm officially taking a break from being a Voyageurs fan.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@colinmoore good decision.
alice @hollanov
did anyone else just watch ilya rozanov short circuit when that reporter showed him a clip of @shanehollander's backhand goal in the 1st?
max @holla.nov2481
that man could not believe his eyes
lily @lilyhollander1221
it was a sexy fucking goal.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GAME FINAL | NYC 7 - MTL 0
see you again on friday, montreal :)
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
this is a threat, btw
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GAME FINAL | NYC 7 - MTL 0
see you again on friday, montreal :)
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
idk what's crazier. scoring a goal in my first playoff game or the way rozanov just made hollander put him on speaker so he could tell us to go get drunk. it's a real toss up.
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
@luke15gillis mob roz. definitely mob roz.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@brisebois38 ur right
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis @brisebois38 you have got to stop calling him that. The last thing his ego needs is a boost.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@luke15gillis @brisebois38 no, don't listen to him. keep calling me that all you want. great nickname. love it.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
Montreal's Gilbert Comeau has been suspended for Game 2 based on footage of his penalty from this match and statements overheard by officials. He will return for Game 3.
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
We take the safety of every player in the League seriously. As such, we have made the decision to suspend Comeau for one game. We are thankful that Hollander was not harmed.
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
Nous prenons très au sérieux la sécurité de tous les joueurs de la ligue. Par conséquent, nous avons décidé de suspendre Comeau pour un match. Nous sommes soulagés que Hollander n'ait pas été blessé.
Colin @colinmoore
"We are thankful Hollander was not harmed" me when I lie.
lily @lilyhollander1221
suspension isn't enough. comeau needs to be dropped in the middle of an ocean without a life raft.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 you have the best ideas.
brett @brettnash
at the kingfisher again and u guys are not going to believe who just walked in
kara @hunter21
was it shane and Very Hot Man?
brett @brettnash
@hunter21 close! it was actually every single member of the ny admirals and hayden pike.
ava @hollander35
what do u mean hayden pike is in a gay bar with the admirals
kara @hunter21
i think we might be missing the bigger picture here: the admirals are in a gay bar.
brett @brettnash
they literally waited outside for hollander and hunter to show up and then came in
kara @hunter21
@brettnash literally what the fuck
brett @brettnash
@hunter21 my friend was closer to the door and heard hunter tell them all they were freaks😂
brett @brettnash
@hunter21 they're having the time of their lives now, though.
brett @brettnash 🔁 kara @hunter21
i spoke too soon ... Very Hot Man just walked in
kara @hunter21
was it shane and Very Hot Man?
kara @hunter21
@brettnash HELLO?? wdym
brett @brettnash
i think this guy might just be friends with the team??? like he's maybe mostly hanging out with hunter but i really couldn't tell you.
brett @brettnash
alright ... pike and hollander just left together
brett @brettnash
this is not the weird part.
brett @brettnash
the weird part: hollander went to tell hunter they were leaving and hunter literally pouted and told hollander that he'd thought hollander WAS STAYING WITH HIM.
brett @brettnash
then hollander said he'd come by in the morning??? and then just left with pike??? what sort of freaked out love triangle is happening rn
shayden @haydenhollander 🔁 brett @brettnash
i actually don't know how to react to this
brett @brettnash
alright ... pike and hollander just left together
lily @lilyhollander1221
all of you idiots shipping my future husband with hayden pike need to pack it up i do not have the energy for your bullshit
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@jackiepike your husband snores
Jackie @jackiepike
@shanehollander he's your husband now
lily @lilyhollander1221
brb need to go threaten someone.
Chapter 25: it's new york, baby
Notes:
almost used the phrase 'go sicko mode' in this chapter and then googled it and realized that song didn't come out until 2018. worst moment of my day, btw.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GAME 2 PLAYOFF FINAL | NYC 4 - MTL 0
see you in MTL for game three :)
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
my airplane buddy :)
Ryan @admirals1987
Hollander moved to NY and immediately adopted a dog and a 19 year old rookie.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
captains are in the building
*photo of Scott, Shane, and Carter walking down the tunnel*
Colin @colinmoore
... I don't think they're running on the power of friendship anymore
gen @genevieve1998
@colinmoore yeah, no, that looks a whole lot more like vengeance.
Zach @zachariah.zach
Did everyone see Hollander's face in the tunnel footage? No more Mr. Canadian Nice Guy holy shit.
Ryan @admirals1987
@zachariah.zach he's about to make Montreal wish they hadn't even shown up.
Colin @colinmoore
Currently in the building for this playoff game, btw.
Colin @colinmoore
Not gonna like live tweet or whatever because living in the moment. But I will say that everyone and their mom is in a Hollander jersey right now.
Colin @colinmoore
Montreal AND New York Hollander jerseys.
ELI @elliot1999
Watching warmups on TV right now and it seems like Hollander was expecting a different sort of welcome. What the FUCK happened in Montreal?
max @holla.nov2481
i think my new favorite activity is watching luke gillis follow shane hollander around. they're like a pair of bonded cats i love them.
alice @hollanov
@holla.nov2481 i feel like shane and scott are the bonded cats and luke is the golden retriever that just followed them home one day
max @holla.nov2481
@hollanov ...that feels more accurate
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis tells us that a bet has been made between him and @shanehollander. however, he refuses to tell us what this bet is. check back later for updates.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
someone tell me how @shanehollander just got lost in this arena of all places
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
update: he claims he knew exactly where he was going
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@greghuffhockey has weighed in: "oh no hollzy was absolutely lost"
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@greghuffhockey has now been threatened with bag skates. on an unrelated note, he would like to amend his statement: "Shane Hollander knew exactly where he was going."
amanda @amanda.mccall
the boys are playing sign of the times in the locker room rn
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 amanda @amanda.mccall
hollander is either going to single-handedly put montreal into the ground or kill himself in front of their bench there is no in between
amanda @amanda.mccall
the boys are playing sign of the times in the locker room rn
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
shane hollander v. montreal starting now
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
sorry, typo, New York Admirals v. Montreal Voyageurs starting now.
Ryan @admirals1987 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Whatever they're paying this admin, it isn't enough.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
shane hollander v. montreal starting now
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Hollander off the bench, takes the pass from Muller, and down the ice for the first point of the game!
NYC 1 - MTL 0 | P1 15:05
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i don't even know what i just watched.
NYC 2 - MTL 0 | P1 14:12
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
video for reference. @shanehollander are we totally sure you're not a god amongst men? just checking.
gen @genevieve1998
are the voyageurs aware they're playing a game rn
shayden @haydenhollander
i'm not entirely convinced they are...
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GILLY GOAL BABY
NYC 3 - MTL 0 | P1 08:27
Ryan @admirals1987
If Luke Gillis isn't Rookie of the Year this shit is RIGGED
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
oh captain my captain, a scott hunter goal.
NYC 4 - MTL 0 | P1 02:08
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 4 - MTL 0 at the end of the first
amanda @amanda.mccall
luke has convinced himself that harry styles makes shane play better. in unrelated news, 'perfect' is currently playing at full fucking volume over the locker room speakers.
ava @hollander35
luke has taste.
ruby @hollanderNYC
they're back on the ice and it looks like montreal remembered how to play hockey ... at least vaguely
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
VAUGHNY BABY WITH THE GOAL (and an assist from Breezy) (we love you Breezy)
NYC 5 - MTL 0 | P2 16:42
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
shane hollander. if someone doesn't lock you down soon, we will. that's a hollzy hatty in less than 25 minutes of regulation play.
NYC 6 - MTL 0 | P2 15:08
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
yeah ... the first option is starting to look more likely
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 amanda @amanda.mccall
hollander is either going to single-handedly put montreal into the ground or kill himself in front of their bench there is no in between
Fletch @RyanFletcher
this might just be the best game of @shanehollander's career and it's not even half over
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
Shane Hollander has always played at a level all his own and this game is proof.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Luke with the backhand right on the back of Hollzy's goal💙
NYC 7 - MTL 0 | P2 14:24
gen @genevieve1998
luke's little point back to shane after that goal 😭😭 i love them so bad
Colin @colinmoore
Coming back on here to say that Eric Bennett is playing like a fucking MAD MAN I don't even know what's happening but it's beautiful to watch.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@bennettofficial I think our first line might've just fallen in love with you
*zoomed in picture of scott, shane, and carter on the bench between shifts near the end of the second period staring at bennett entirely mesmerized*
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 7 - MTL 0 at the end of the 2nd we'll be back after this break
ava @hollander35
@amanda.mccall i think gillis might've been right.
amanda @amanda.mccall
@hollander35 ...he picked happily this time
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
SHANE HOLLANDER AGAIN WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW
NYC 8 - MTL 0 | P3 17:02
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
dying at the admirals admin crashing out over their own player
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
SHANE HOLLANDER AGAIN WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW
NYC 8 - MTL 0 | P3 17:02
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
Hollander is currently one goal away from tying the record for most goals scored during a playoff game. The last player to touch the record was Mario Lemieux in 1989.
ava @hollander35
shane hollander is really about to make hockey history on the power of harry styles
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane Hollander making history once again. That's five goals for Hollander.
NYC 9 - MTL 0 | P3 13:57
gen @genevieve1998 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
you know shit's serious when the admin brings out proper capitalization
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane Hollander making history once again. That's five goals for Hollander.
NYC 9 - MTL 0 | P3 13:57
Ryan @admirals1987
Hollander is a living legend.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
...my degree did not tell me how to react to this
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
30 seconds left on the clock and New York's Shane Hollander just put up his 6th goal of the game.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane just broke a record that was set in 1919 by Montreal's Newsy Lalonde. Since then, it's only been touched by four other players.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Montreal's Maurice "Rocket" Richard in 1944, Toronto's Darryl Sittler in 1976, Philadelphia's Reggie Leach in 1976, and Pittsburgh's Mario Lemieux in 1989.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Newsy Lalonde, the original record holder, captained Montreal to their first Stanley Cup win. Shane Hollander captained Montreal to their two most recent.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander we are incredibly proud of you and we are so lucky to call you a member of our organization💙❤️🗽
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane Hollander, ladies and gentlemen.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Shane just broke a record that was set in 1919 by Montreal's Newsy Lalonde. Since then, it's only been touched by four other players.
Ryan @admirals1987 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the "and then you fumbled him" is implied.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Newsy Lalonde, the original record holder, captained Montreal to their first Stanley Cup win. Shane Hollander captained Montreal to their two most recent.
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
I don't even know where to start.
shayden @haydenhollander
we could start with the way hayden pike noticed he'd broken the record before literally anyone else on the ice
ava @hollander35
i'd like to start with the fact that hollander just walked into the hall for media shirtless
gen @genevieve1998
@hollander35 yes, that. since the actual FUCK when does shane hollander look like That?
lily @lilyhollander1221
@genevieve1998 since always. catch up.
ava @hollander35
hold on one goddamn second why is hollander grinning. that is not a media smile.
ava @hollander35
IS THAT HAYDEN PIKE??
ava @hollander35
hollander just straight up disappeared what is happening rn
shayden @haydenhollander
i think i heard shane say something about staying with the kids???
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander sorry for being an asshole when you beat me for Rookie of the Year.
i'm starting to think it was deserved. congrats, man.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov thanks, Roz.
alice @hollanov 🔁 Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
can these fuckers let me BREATHE FOR ONE GODDAMN SECOND WHAT THE FUCK (emphasis) IS GOING ON?
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander sorry for being an asshole when you beat me for Rookie of the Year.
i'm starting to think it was deserved. congrats, man.
alice @hollanov
and shane replied. i don't know what to do with myself rn.
alice @hollanov
on a different note. shane hollander breaking that record in montreal's own fucking house after whatever fuckery happened that sent him to new york felt like poetic justice.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
breaking that record under two stanley cup banners HE won while he's no longer playing for them? you are an icon, shane hollander.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
It's an absolute honor to be spoken about alongside the names of the legends I grew up idolizing. Thank you to the fans and to my team and, most especially, to my family. I couldn't have done this without any of you.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
(guys please don't make fun of me) i just watched one guy i had a poster of on my wall make history on an assist from another guy i had a poster of on my wall while wearing the same jersey as them.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
playing with @scotthunter this entire season has been incredible but since @shanehollander showed up it's been an actual dream.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander, thank you for everything you've already done for me and for our team.
(the next day)
alice @hollanov
hollander really posted a manager written tweet and dipped where the fuck did he go😂😂
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
📍Aquarium de Montréal
Colin @colinmoore
Did ... did Shane Hollander just break a century old record and then dip to hang out with his best friend's kids?
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore that certainly seems to be the case
@haydpike35 ✪
1. 
2. 
everyone say hi to Amber Pike🩷
@shanehollander ✪
Best part of playing in MTL was getting to be here to meet my niece🩷
ava @hollander35
oh my god he broke a record and then dipped to watch his best friend's kids while hayden and jackie were at the hospital😭😭
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Amber & Uncle Shane
Shane ✪ @shanehollander 🔁 Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
I am going to spoil this child rotten.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Amber & Uncle Shane
Jackie @jackiepike
And how is that any different from our other three children?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@jackepike it's not.
Jackie @jackiepike
@shanehollander you are a menace. I love you dearly.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game 4 Final | NYC 5 - MTL 1
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@haydpike35 congrats on your goal and congrats to you and @jackiepike on your new addition🩷
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
also, as an update on the @luke15gillis and @shanehollander bet, they still refuse to release information but it had to do with winning the first series in a 4-0 sweep so i guess we'll find out soon enough
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander can we have milk and cookies?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis sure, buddy.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
they are sitting directly next to each other. just by the way.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander can we have milk and cookies?
Notes:
fuckin hell. finally caught up with the main series. the amount of time i have spent on pinterest trying to find pictures over the last three days is ridiculous and can never happen again. i'm going to bed i love you all goodnight.
Chapter 26: roommates
Chapter Text
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
only an hour and a half flight but you can bet the kid and hollzy will still be asleep the entire time
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Let them live, Huff, they're sleepy from planning something absurd.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
they're also sleepy from running a really effective campaign for MVP and Rookie of the Year but that's beside the point
breezy ✪ @brisebois38 🔁 Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
huff's angle failed to capture the fact that sunny is knocked tf out in luke's lap
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
only an hour and a half flight but you can bet the kid and hollzy will still be asleep the entire time
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
you should all know that Breezy risked climbing over a sleeping @jallomatti to get that picture.
kara @hunter21
@brisebois38 thank you for your service🫡
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
just touched down in ny and we were finally informed of the terms of @luke15gillis and @shanehollander's bet
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
by "informed" we mean @luke15gillis just shouted "sleepover at Hollzy's!" on the tarmac.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
this sleepover will take place tomorrow (thursday) night and is (unwillingly??) being hosted by @shanehollander
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis is adamant that everyone show up. he has somehow infiltrated the WAG chat (we genuinely don't know how and we are honestly impressed) and has reported that the WAGs are on his side so good luck to anyone attempting to get out of this.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
they've been asked (read: told) to post content but refused to accept direction so we're all going to be living through this together.
ruby @hollanderNYC 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
"refused to accept direction" is actually hilarious
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
they've been asked (read: told) to post content but refused to accept direction so we're all going to be living through this together.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Just pulled up to the Kid and Shane's house and One Direction is currently blasting through every single speaker in this house.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Just in case you thought I was exaggerating:
*attached video of Shane and Luke carrying bags of marinating chicken out to the grill, Magic by One Direction is clearly audible in the background*
gen @genevieve1998 🔁 Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
just ... several things to point out ... this says "the Kid and Shane's house" as in ... luke and shane's house?? did luke move in with shane??
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Just pulled up to the Kid and Shane's house and One Direction is currently blasting through every single speaker in this house.
gen @genevieve1998
also, shane hollander going through a one direction phase isn't something i realized i needed until literally rn
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
can anyone explain to me why @scotthunter is following @shanehollander around complaining about how hollzy doesn't 'understand vision'??
Matti ✪ @jallomatti
i was just coming on here to ask the same thing.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Because I'm normal, unlike the two of you, I just went up and asked instead of going to Twitter.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@bennettofficial okay but what was the answer?
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
@vaughan19 I have no clue. It made less sense after they explained it, to be totally honest.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@bennettofficial ... right, well, that checks out
Yuna @YunaHollander
@vaughan19 @bennettoffiical @jallomatti I let Scott pick out what interview Shane was going to do this week because Scott understands vision. My son does not.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@YunaHollander much appreciated. however, your son is about 15 seconds away from pushing scott in front of a moving train.
Yuna @YunaHollander
@vaughan19 well ... I wish Scott the best.
Cale ✪ @calewagnerNHL
The kids took their shirts off and refuse to put them back on. They apparently don't care that they're increasing their risk of getting burned. Idiots.
Ryan @admirals1987
There's actually no way that Cale Wagner just logged into his Twitter for the first time in 2 years to post a picture of Gillis, McCormick, Muller, and Breezy shirtless in Shane Hollander's back yard
Zach @zachariah.zach
He did, actually. But he made it about fire safety somehow which feels on brand.
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
@KaraWagner do you think your husband's aware he just posted a thirst trap?
Kara @KaraWagner
@brisebois38 can one of you PLEASE say the words "thirst trap" to his face and record his reaction
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
@KaraWagner as the lady doth requested:
*video of Cameron (one of the other young guys) explaining the concept of a thirst trap to Wagner, Breezy can be heard trying not to laugh as he records, Wagner is just looking increasingly concerned as the seconds go on and then says "THAT'S how you people get dates now?"*
Kara @KaraWagner
@martine.brisebois I love your husband.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
hey @NHLBears @NHLFlyers we're gonna watch your game. let us know if you want sunny pics for everyone who scores.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
i think our entire team (and @marlowofficial specifically) might actually cry if you don't follow through on that offer
Philadelphia Flyers ✪ @NHLFlyers
we ABSOLUTELY want sunny pictures please and thank you
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
hollzy is incredibly confused about why @CameronMcCormick and @nick29muller are following his dog around like paparazzi
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
update: he immediately gave up on any attempt to understand and is now teamed up with @luke15gillis actively kicking @greghuffhockey and @scotthunter's asses in soccer
Matti ✪ @jallomatti
@scotthunter is yelling about elder abuse meanwhile @luke15gillis and @shanehollander are cackling like cartoon villains
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
hey @NYAdmirals are you guys aware that your team is live tweeting their sleepover as if it were a game?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we are well aware. we've been told that the only rules are no drinking, no being dicks, and no burning shane's house down. we are witnessing chaos unfold right along with everyone else.
max @holla.nov2481
do you guys think that admirals and bears admin know that they've both, over the course of the past week, interacted with hollanov stan accounts?
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Just a couple of minutes before the start of Boston v. Philadelphia Game 5!!! The series currently sits at BOS 2 - PHI 2.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
hey @NYAdmirals one of you owes us a dog picture, roz just scored
BOS 1 - PHI 0 | P1 09:34
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
this dog picture also comes with a message from every admiral under the age of 25 years, 11 months, and 10 days: we love you, Mob Roz.
kara @hunter21
@nick26muller is that one day less than hollander's exact age??😂😂
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@hunter21 yes.
Philadelphia Flyers ✪ @NHLFlyers
@NYAdmirals our turn, boys. McLeod evens out the score💪💪
PHI 1 - BOS 1 | P1 03:19
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
here you go🫶🫶
Luke ✪@luke15gillis
mom and dad are making me cookies :)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis you've only been living there for one day and you're already calling them mom and dad?
Luke ✪@luke15gillis
@NYAdmirals we've BEEN calling them mom and dad, get with the program (this is a joke @shanehollander i know @bennettofficial is mom) (love you, brother)
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis love you too, brother (keep pissing off scott it's really funny when he gets mad)
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
@luke15gillis is getting a full on lecture from @scotthunter about how scotty's not old enough to be his dad and i don't think any of it is sinking in
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
buddy just asked about adult adoption. dad looks like he's trying to light someone on fire with his eyes.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I hate all of you.
Colin @colinmoore
I really might've slipped too far into fangirl psychosis but did the Admirals official account just imply that Luke Gillis not only moved into Shane Hollander's house but that SCOTT HUNTER IS LIVING THERE TOO?
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore yeah, i really think they might've.
gen @genevieve1998
i don't know what i'm supposed to believe anymore someone needs to draw a diagram.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
hey @NYAdmirals you guys seem a little busy rn but in case anyone's paying attention, Connors just scored and it was a REALLY pretty goal
BOS 2 - PHI 1 | P2 14:18
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
sunny for connors. that goal was a BEAUT my friend.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I have several couches and this is how they choose to sit.
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
as if you, scott, and carter aren't all sitting in a chair made for one person right now.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@brisebois28 we are your captains, show some respect.
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
@vaughan19 unlikely.
Philadelphia Flyers ✪ @NHLFlyers
Webster straight into the top shelf!!!
PHI 2 - BOS 2 | P3 10:18
Philadelphia Flyers ✪ @NHLFlyers
@NYAdmirals we're waiting for puppy pics ... if mom and dad haven't taken your phones yet
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
we still have our phones but we did have to take a break to change into our pjs. tell webster that shot was magnificent.
Philadelphia Flyers ✪ @NHLFlyers
@CameronMcCormick hold on😂😂 are you guys ACTUALLY having a sleepover? like for real? this isn't a bit?
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
@NHLFlyers oh no, not a bit. we invaded hollzy's house and we're not leaving until after he makes us pancakes for breakfast.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals 🔁 cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
hollzy broke a century old record and is celebrating by hosting the entire team and making them pancakes. we love you @shanehollander.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
@NHLFlyers oh no, not a bit. we invaded hollzy's house and we're not leaving until after he makes us pancakes for breakfast.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NYAdmirals what they don't know is that I don't have one single clue how to make pancakes (p.s. I love you too)
Jackie @jackiepike
@shanehollander what were they thinking asking the guy who's spent the past five years eating bird food to make pancakes?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@jackiepike no one knows.
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
The Philadelphia v. Boston game is tied 2-2 at the end of regulation. We'll be back soon for the beginning of OT.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
hollzy and scotty are both pacing like rabid dogs rn you'd think THEY were playing this game
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
never in my life have i seen two people this insane about hockey
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
you two have CLEARLY never spent time around hollander and rozanov. what you're currently witnessing is but a fraction of how truly insane shane hollander can get when someone is ready to match his hockey freak.
Brophy ✪ @JamesBrophyNJ
@vaughan19 is right. Those two are genuinely terrifying.
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
We are back, live in Philadelphia for OT.
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
As a reminder, the teams will continue to play 5 v. 5 in 20 minute increments. OT is sudden death (the first goal ends the game).
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
ILYA ROZANOV WITH THE GOAL 45 SECONDS INTO OT SOMEONE QUEUE SALT-N-PEPA'S WHATTA MAN
BOS 3 - PHI 2 | OT 19:15
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
sunny's down for the count but i'm sure if she were awake she would say LET'S FUCKING GOOOO, ATTA BOY MOB ROZ ... or something like that.
shayden @haydenhollander
dying at these two admirals players all over boston and philly's mentions
ava @hollander35
they fully commandeered hollander's dog
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
see you all back in boston for game six this saturday.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov 🔁 Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
hey @shanehollander wtf buddy
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
this dog picture also comes with a message from every admiral under the age of 25 years, 11 months, and 10 days: we love you, Mob Roz.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Yeah, I am not calling you Mob Roz.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@shanehollander good choice also I love your dog.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial check your texts.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@shanehollander is my new best friend. @ilyarozanov find a new one.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
rude.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
hey @vaughan19 let's be best friends.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@ilyarozanov you high key terrify me. i think i'm gonna stick with hollzy.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@vaughan19 :(
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Yeah, @marlowofficial you can deal with Roz as penance for knocking me out. I'm keeping Vaughny.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
bonfire at my best friend's (not @scotthunter, btw) house :)
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I should probably be mad about everyone picking Shane over me but, honestly, I get it.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter awwww, thanks grandpa💙
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander I take it back.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
good morning everyone i hope you all had a very normal night last night
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
this just in: @shanehollander and his new roommate @luke15gillis made pancakes for everyone
*attached photo of the entire team scattered around Shane's kitchen and dining room eating pancakes, bacon, eggs, etc. they're all in their pajamas, hair a mess, everyone's grinning*
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
team sleepover = success.
Chapter 27: pictures of you
Notes:
using the numéro netherlands shoot as the gq pics bc most of the gq pics had both hudson & connor
also, just as context, ilya was in a fugue state after seeing a hot man and he hasn't seen shane in a month so he's, naturally, losing his mind. as such, he somehow still has no fucking clue that shane knows about his account.
also also, i spent a lot too long drawing shane's freckles onto pictures of hudson in procreate today
also also also, i have Ideas (tm) for the men's health interview ur just gonna have to give me a second to get there.
Chapter Text
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
philly won :(
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
tune in for game seven on monday
@shanehollander ✪
Enjoyed the opportunity to sit down with @gq about all things hockey :)
@haydpike35✪ Please tell me you don't think that people looking at this article actually care about hockey.
@jeanjboiziau✪ @haydpike35 I give it 5 minutes before he texts you to ask what you meant by that
@haydpike35✪ @jeanjboiziau Wrong, he texted in two.
@shanehollander✪ @haydpike35 @jeanjboiziau I'm feeling ganged up on.@roselandry✪ you are a beautiful man, shane hollander.
@hollander35 absolutely no one cares about the hockey
@machogan @hollander35 I care at least a little about the hockey
@colinmoore @hollander35 @machogan The amount I care about the hockey is decreasing by the day.
@hollander35 @colinmoore i see Shane 'Sexual Awakening' Hollander has struck again.
@colinmoore @hollander35 When did he strike the first time?
@hollander35 @colinmoore idk, @haydpike35 when did you first meet shane?@vaughanofficial✪ can't believe @scotthunter got to watch this shoot happen. lucky lucky man.
@scotthunter✪ @vaughanofficial He literally told you that you could come and you said you had 'important plans'.
@shanehollander✪ @scotthunter @vaughanofficial Come to find out, his "important plans" were watching Shrek 2.@jackiepike goddamn, babe
@easybreezy✪ @calewagner51 this is a thirst trap, btw.
@calewagner51✪ @easybreezy Yeah, I think I got that.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you @GQMagazine
https://www.gq.com/story/shane-hollander
https://www.numeronetherlands.com/in-conversation-with-shane-hollander
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander holly, my man, wow😍🥵
max @holla.nov2481
i have nothing appropriate to say
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
actually how does he keep getting hotter this needs to be studied
ava @hollander35
do you ever find someone so pretty you want to block them on everything so you never have to see their face again??
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
HOLLZY BUDDY 🔥🔥🔥
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander I was literally standing behind the camera and I'm somehow still shocked that you look this good.
gen @genevieve1998
shane, my friend, you need to stop posting pictures of yourself without first issuing a public warning.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
i'm gonna print this picture out and frame it in my house.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
can you pick something to be bad at please this is getting distressing
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis you watched me burn 15 pancakes like two days ago.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander right, i'd forgotten, i feel better now.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander also, can you pick up eggs? we're out.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis stop communicating with me through twitter you weirdo (added eggs to the list)
GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
Sat down with @shanehollander to talk records, playoffs, and the @NYAdmirals chemistry, or, what hockey fans are calling "the power of friendship"
.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
kara @hunter21
i was never taught how to appropriately react to something like this
ava @hollander35
guys the articles have more pictures. i repeat, the articles have more pictures.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander thank God you're finally letting the people see your abs
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@haydpike35 you think we can convince him to always do media shirtless?
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@vaughan19 I tried for seven years, it's your turn now, pal.
ava @hollander35
i - i don't .... HUH?
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@hollander35 totally valid reaction
ava @hollander35
what the fuck is hayden pike doing in my mentions
mac @hockeyfan1992 🔁 Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I am actually no longer even sort of joking about the Shane/Scott agenda.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander I was literally standing behind the camera and I'm somehow still shocked that you look this good.
alice @hollanov 🔁 Scott ✪ @scotthunter
i need hollanov to do something crazy real quick because @hockeyfan1992 is getting too close to being right for my taste.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander I was literally standing behind the camera and I'm somehow still shocked that you look this good.
alice @hollanov
OH MY FUCKING GOD??
alice @hollanov
not a one of my thoughts is PG rn
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@hollanov me neither (I'm gonna momentarily forgive you for your choice of ship because we're in agreement rn)
alice @hollanov
@haydpike35 ... ariana, what are you doing here
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@hollanov looking at pictures of my best friend? What are you doing here?
2x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
whoever came up with this concept ... i want to kiss you on the mouth.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Me too, honestly.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Hey @shanehollander, who came up with this concept so me and Twitter user @shollander24 can kiss them on the mouth?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35 I'm choosing to save the GQ creative team from you ... but @scotthunter and @YunaHollander approved it so do what you will with that information.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Well, @YunaHollander you have my undying love but I love David too much to kiss you on the mouth. @scotthunter on the other hand...
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander quick question, does @haydpike35 have an off switch?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter no.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander damn.
shayden @haydenhollander 🔁 Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
the way this isn't even the craziest thing he's said today
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander holly, my man, wow😍🥵
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@haydenhollander I can get crazier if you want
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@haydenhollander also, love the username. Much better than @hollanov
shayden @haydenhollander
do you think he'd run me over with that zamboni if i asked nicely enough?
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander what do you think, buddy? quite the offer here.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@jackiepike take his phone away.
Jackie @jackiepike
@shanehollander not a chance this is the most fun I've had all year
alice @hollanov 🔁 Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
where the hell is @lilyhollander1221 we are drowning out here
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@haydenhollander also, love the username. Much better than @hollanov
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
I was just informed of the existence of @lilyhollander1221 ... Lily, can I just say, those are some very creative threats. Well done.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@haydpike35 we found Lily's account the other week and have been constantly entertained ever since
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
... there's no way this means what i think it means
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
@ROZ81HOLLZY i think it means exactly what you think it means (if what you mean is that our entire team is obsessed with this girl's account)
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@CameronMcCormick that's exactly what i meant, yeah.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
hey @haydpike35 fair warning i think he's gonna kill you.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
you know what, i'm not seeing enough people talking about this picture for my taste.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
right? that one's my favorite.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@luke15gillis are you the one who told him to post it on ig?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@nick29muller yes, sir
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@luke15gillis well done
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@nick29muller @luke15gillis if the pair of you don't quit I'm not going to buy you dinner.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander that threat works less well when you already ordered and we're the ones driving to pick it up.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis ...just don't lose my credit card.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@shanehollander we stole your dog, btw
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Well, that explains where she went.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
I think we, as a society, need to be talking more about this picture.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
I'm going to petition to make this the new Canadian flag.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander this is a very good picture of you. I'm gonna print it out and carry it around in my wallet.
shayden @haydenhollander
@haydpike35 you really went with the most wholesome option, huh?
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@haydenhollander he's a wholesome guy. A real cutie. You just wanna pinch his cheeks.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@haydpike35 just pinched his cheeks for you. he's unimpressed.
kara @hunter21
...all of the admirals are tweeting like they're in the same place again
max @holla.nov2481
i don't think you can legally separate any of them.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Just a question that's been on my mind for no particular reason
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@shanehollander :(
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Puck Drop for Game 7 in FIVE MINUTES
ava @hollander35
i know it's been a couple of hours but can we go back to shane saying that HIS MOM AND SCOTT HUNTER approved the GQ concept???
kara @hunter21
@hollander35 yeah that's all I've been able to think about
ruby @hollanderNYC
let me ask the question no one's been asking: where is Very Hot Man in all of this?
kara @hunter21
hopefully somewhere getting to kiss either scott or shane on the mouth because if one of them isn't doing it i will.
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hunter21 something tells me you're not Very Hot Man's type.
Colin @colinmoore
At some point in the last two months I made some sort of insane transformation from hockey fan to Shane Hollander Fangirl and, I've gotta say, life's much more entertaining now.
mac @hockeyfan1992
It's been like an hour since any of the Admirals posted. Did @shanehollander put them all in timeout?
amanda @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 if i had to bet, they're all just locked in on the @NHLBears v. @NHLFlyers game
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander is very pretty. send tweet.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
for real, though, go read @shanehollander's interview with @GQMagazine
we're incredibly proud of you, Shane 💙❤️🗽
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
BEARS WINS BABY!! SEE YOU ON THURSDAY @NYAdmirals
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
...okay now that that's taken care of
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
@shanehollander 😉😍🥰
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Hey @shanehollander I think the Boston Bears are flirting with you?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter he passed out as soon as the game ended. you're gonna have to handle this one.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@luke15gillis are you telling me to fight the Bears admin for Shane's honor?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter i'd do it but, alas, 'tis my bed time.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@NYAdmirals Amanda, Christina, one of you want to take this?
amanda @amanda.mccall
@scotthunter he blocked my number. i'm not fighting his battles.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@amanda.mccall something tells me you deserved that.
amanda @amanda.mccall
@scotthunter all i did was text him seventeen different gifs of dogs barking??
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
@shanehollander you'd have a wonderful career as a model. if you want to start that career sometime before thursday we'd appreciate it.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i'm back what did i miss
lily @lilyhollander1221
oh my god?
lily @lilyhollander1221
OH MY GOD
lily @lilyhollander1221
i don't know where to start
lily @lilyhollander1221
actually, you know what, yes i do.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@haydpike35 die.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@lilyhollander1221 no thanks ❤️
lily @lilyhollander1221
now that that's taken care of
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@lilyhollander1221 I don't think anything was taken care of
lily @lilyhollander1221
NOW THAT THAT'S TAKEN CARE OF
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
this is the best any man has ever looked ever.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you @GQMagazine
https://www.gq.com/story/shane-hollander
https://www.numeronetherlands.com/in-conversation-with-shane-hollander
alice @hollanov
that was surprisingly tame
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov i'm not done
lily @lilyhollander1221
let's just start wholesome and see where we go. this picture makes me want to kiss his nose and tell him he's beautiful.
lily @lilyhollander1221
one day i'm going to stare at him long enough to count every single one of his freckles
lily @lilyhollander1221
those freckles and that cute little smile are what made me fall in love with him
lily @lilyhollander1221
whoever decided to have him shirtless during early playoff bulk, you are my hero.
lily @lilyhollander1221
also, i'm not over the earrings yet.
lily @lilyhollander1221
lily @lilyhollander1221
@vaughan19 once again, good sir, thank you for your service
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@lilyhollander1221 you are so welcome, Lily. please never stop posting.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@vaughan19 i don't plan to.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i want to sink my teeth into his pecs.
lily @lilyhollander1221
maybe crawl into his skin.
lily @lilyhollander1221
it would take an army to pry me out of him.
alice @hollanov
right, that's more like it.
lily @lilyhollander1221
if i don't have his dick in my mouth in the next five minutes i'm going to commit a crime.
max @holla.nov2481
there she is.
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
no. no. absolutely not. GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY FUTURE HUSBAND.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
@shanehollander 😉😍🥰
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@lilyhollander1221 we need your thoughts on the Scott/Shane debacle.
lily @lilyhollander1221
scott hunter is a dinosaur. there is no way he landed shane hollander.
kara @hunter21
@lilyhollander1221 he's not that old
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hunter21 he was present for the birth of Christ.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i want to stick my tongue so far down his throat that we become one being.
lily @lilyhollander1221
idk what to say about this other than yum.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i want to bite each of his abs.
lily @lilyhollander1221
just lick his chest until he's begging.
lily @lilyhollander1221
he looks so pretty when he cries.
lily @lilyhollander1221
okay i think that's enough internet for me tonight.
@shanehollander ✪
Thank you to the team at Timid for the opportunity to talk about identity and community❤️
@yunahollander Your dad and I are so proud of you, Shane❤️❤️
@jeanjboiziau✪ looking good, capitaine.
@haydpike35✪ Can't say enough how proud I am of you, Holly
@vaughanofficial✪ Get you a man who can do both (thirst trap AND talk eloquently about identity and tokenism)
Timid Magazine @timidmag
Shane Hollander reflects on identity, vulnerability, and choosing yourself. ❤️ #ShaneHollander #timidmag
Timid Magazine @timidmag
"I think having good boundaries that you set is really important," he says. "What I'll talk about with the press, what I won't, how much press I even do." Through it all, he's leaning on his community. "I'm connecting with my friends because they're my stability and my source of joy and peace."
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@shanehollander i am so grateful you're a part of my community💙
Yuna @YunaHollander
@shanehollander so proud of you, honey
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you @timidmag for giving me the chance to talk a little less about hockey and a little more about myself.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
proud of you, bud
Cale ✪ @calewagnerNHL
Love you for hockey AND yourself, Hollzy💙
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
great interview, Hollander
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander is the best person in my life. everyone go read his interview in @timidmag. he's so much more than hockey.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis 💙💙💙
lily @lilyhollander1221
i'm gonna say three (3) wholesome things and then all bets are off.
lily @lilyhollander1221
1. everyone talks about his hockey IQ, but he is so much smarter than hockey.
lily @lilyhollander1221
2. it takes a special kind of person to stay strong when they feel like they're on the outside. hollander is that kind of person.
lily @lilyhollander1221
3. instead of isolating himself, shane has become the mentor he always needed for the younger players and i think that deserves praise.
lily @lilyhollander1221
now, back to our regularly scheduled programming.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i want to lick the sweat off his abs.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
home against @NHLBears tonight
Ryan @admirals1987
Did I hear correctly that movement has been made in the first line??
Colin @colinmoore
Manifesting Starting Center Shane Hollander.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore who taught you the word manifesting?
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 the girls we've somehow become friends with on the internet.
max @holla.nov2481
after days drowning in a sea of shayden, hollanov is currently talking at the red line.
alice @hollanov
hollanov is FLIRTING at the red line
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
ilya literally hooked the back of shane's jersey with his stick. we used to pray for times like these.
Chapter 28: in all my dreams
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
#Admirals🗽 lines today
GILLIS - HOLLANDER - VAUGHAN
WAGNER - HUNTER - HUFF
McCORMICK - JANMARK - MULLER
ARMSTRONG - PRENTICE - KAY
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore your manifesting worked.
Colin @colinmoore
We've prayed for times like these.
Ryan @admirals1987
Playing Hunter and Hollander as Centers back to back is unfair to the rest of the NHL. I love this for us.
Colin @colinmoore
Manifesting works people🙏🕯️
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
cap waiting his turn for media💙❤️🗽
ruby @hollanderNYC
... am i insane or is he looking at shane in this picture?
ava @hollander35
are Shane and Scott contractually obligated to be within five feet of each other at all times?
kara @hunter21
if they are, they don't seem mad about it.
max @holla.nov2481
hollanov jersey bet we have never been so back
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
shane looked SMITTEN when ilya walked into the hall
alice @hollanov
they are fully in love i actually refuse to believe otherwise i am SICK of these shott and shayden bitches. hollanov today, hollanov tomorrow, hollanov forever.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov girl did you just paraphrase katniss everdeen?
alice @hollanov
max @holla.nov2481
@hollanov ...shane as katniss and ilya as peeta makes an odd amount of sense.
shayden @haydenhollander
between the jersey bet and this face off ... the hollanovs are going to be INSUFFERABLE. kill me now.
max @holla.nov2481
you had your time. it's our turn now.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
HOLLZY WITH THE GOOAAAAL!
NYC 1 - BOS 0 | P1 19:51
Colin @colinmoore
Nine seconds?? NINE SECONDS??? Jesus Christ. Montreal you are STUPID.
max @holla.nov2481
luke immediately cuddling up to shane on the bench?? that's his biological child.
alice @hollanov
they are so cute i can never tell if they're giving father and son, brothers, or two stray cats that found each other in the woods outside a small town.
max @holla.nov2481
@hollanov that last one was really specific
alice @hollanov
@holla.nov2481 i said what i said.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
SCOTT HUNTER!!!
NYC 2 - BOS 0 | P1 9:18
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
St-Simon puts it in the top shelf!
BOS 1 - NYC 2 | P1 00:57
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 2 - BOS 1 at the end of the first! see u soon for the second :)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GILLY GOAL, BABY!
NYC 3 - BOS 1 | P2 14:02
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
*attached video of Carter, Luke, and Shane on the bench, Shane's holding the iPad and Carter and Luke are quite obviously talking over each other with Shane saying something every few seconds*
just yap city over here with these three
Ryan @admirals1987
Shane Hollander iPad Kid
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i feel like none of them ever shut up, ever.
amanda @amanda.mccall
@ROZ81HOLLZY they do not. we love them all the more for it.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
WE LOVE YOU ILYA ROZANOV
BOS 2 - NYC 3 | P2 11:03
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
vaughny scores! that's a goal each for our new first line💙❤️🗽
NYC 4 - BOS 2 | P3 00:37
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game final, NYC 4 - BOS 2
Chapter 29: when i run out of road
Chapter Text
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Game Two Final: BOS 3 - NYC 2, see you on Tuesday in @tdgarden (the better garden)
MSG ✪ @TheGarden
now let's not go making claims we can't back up
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game three final ... NYC 2 - BOS 1 (does this count as defending @TheGarden's honor??)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game four final ... NYC 2 - BOS 0 (i think we've officially defended @TheGarden's honor)
MSG ✪ @TheGarden
new york, baby!
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Game Five Final: BOS 4 - NYC 3 (this one was for @tdgarden)
TD Garden ✪ @tdgarden
GO BEARS
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
welcome to @tdgarden for game six ... also happy early birthday @shanehollander
mac @hockeyfan1992
There is no way the Bears' media team decorated Hollander's locker for his birthday
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
@hockeyfan1992 we had help from the @NYAdmirals team 💛❤️
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
max @holla.nov2481
shane hollander is the luckiest man alive.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
very motivating speech from our captain. let's get this done, boys!
*attached video of Scott's pregame speech, “Let’s finish this tonight, I want to be done with Boston for this year, I want to win this game and then go out and celebrate Shane’s birthday and then I want to go home and sleep for 36 hours without any of you bothering me. Sound good?" includes the team yelling in response and cuts off just after Scott winks at Shane who's already grinning at him*
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 how do we feel about this.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore I think the theory can be upgraded to a rumor.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
gilly right off the bat!
NYC 1 - BOS 0 | P1 19:17
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
THAT'S OUR CAPTAIN
NYC 2 - BOS 0 | P1 18:45
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the (almost) birthday boy scores to bring us up to 3!
NYC 3 - BOS 0 | P1 03:52
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
3-0 at the end of the first 💪💪
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Roz puts us on the map!
BOS 1 - NYC 3 | P2 10:07
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
roz might've scored, but hollzy sure did answer. that was a BEAUT @shanehollander
NYC 4 - BOS 1 | P2 07:02
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
first goal of the game for vaughny!!
NYC 5 - BOS 1 | P2 03:19
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
5-1 at the end of the second, see u soon 😘
ruby @hollanderNYC
i want to love my job as much as admirals admin clearly does
amanda @amanda.mccall
@hollanderNYC my boss gave me control of the twitter for some unknown reason so i'm just gonna have my fun until someone comes to their senses
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
St-Simon scores!!
BOS 2 - NYC 5 | P3 17:01
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
aaaand that's a luke gillis goal with the assist from hollander #roommategoals
NYC 6 - BOS 2 | P3 12:12
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i feel like i just saw God what is happening
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
our first line, ladies and gents. that's a vaughny goal (with another assist from hollzy) #bffgoals
NYC 7 - BOS 2 | P3 12:02
Ryan @admirals1987
Alright, sure, fuck it, #bffgoals
Ryan @admirals1987 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
...I think Cliff Marlow is about to MEET God.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i feel like i just saw God what is happening
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
marlow keep your hands off our son this is not a joke
mac @hockeyfan1992
Of fucking COURSE the first time Shane Hollander drops gloves it's in defense of Luke Gillis
mac @hockeyfan1992
Hold on ... since when can Hollander fight?
mac @hockeyfan1992
Marlow holding onto Hollander's jersey as if he's about to fight back but just standing there and taking the hits instead😂
mac @hockeyfan1992
Oh look! Vaughan just got involved.
mac @hockeyfan1992
If anyone put money on the odds of either of these two fighting, you're probably ROLLING in it rn
Colin @colinmoore
Shane Hollander actually fighting has awakened something in me.
ava @hollander35
did Shane 'Sexual Awakening' Hollander just strike?
Colin @colinmoore
@hollander35 he really might've.
kara @hunter21
i'm sorry, is that ilya rozanov checking on luke gillis rn??
mac @hockeyfan1992
@hunter21 ...yes?
kara @hunter21
@hockeyfan1992 why?
mac @hockeyfan1992
@hunter21 I've got zero fucking clue
max @holla.nov2481
walk with me people. luke gillis = hollanov son.
shayden @haydenhollander
walking w you straight to the psych ward
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
...i might be walking with you.
max @holla.nov2481
@BOS81 the voices in the breeze are telling me you know something.
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
@holla.nov2481 i'm at the game and was sitting down by the glass right by where luke went down and when rozanov helped him up he called him 'rozy'
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
@holla.nov2481 NO ONE calls him rozy. everyone calls him roz. he's literally corrected people from rozy to roz before. he didn't correct gillis.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Hollander and Vaughn have been issued five minute majors.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
fair warning to the rest of the league, ig: hands off gilly
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
#noticing #observing
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
@holla.nov2481 i'm at the game and was sitting down by the glass right by where luke went down and when rozanov helped him up he called him 'rozy'
kara @hunter21
i think it's entirely possible that we've all collectively lost our minds.
Colin @colinmoore
Hollander & Vaughan in the sin bin:
Ryan @admirals1987
I'm cheering FOR them and I'm afraid of them rn.
Colin @colinmoore
@admirals1987 I think they're about to make Boston regret the moment the NHL gave them a charter.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
penalty clock has run out, first shift at full power with hollander and vaughan back on the ice, 1:15 remains in regulation
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
VAUGHNY HATTY! VAUGHNY HATTY! VAUGHNY HATTY!
NYC 8 - BOS 2 | P3 01:08
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GILLY HATTY! GILLY HATTY! GILLY HATTY!
NYC 9 - BOS 2 | P3 01:00
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
HOLLZY HATTY! HOLLZY HATTY! HOLLZY HATTY!
NYC 10 - BOS 2 | P3 00:37
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
just in case you didn't catch that: VAUGHNY HATTY! GILLY HATTY! HOLLZY HATTY! TRIPLE HATTY!
alice @hollanov
admirals admin using PAUL REVERE to announce their first line's hattys against BOSTON is KILLING ME
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
AND THAT'S AN ADMIRALS WIN, BABY!! 10-2!!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hope ur ready to rep hollzy next week @ilyarozanov
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
yeah ... something tells me he's not too upset about this
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hope ur ready to rep hollzy next week @ilyarozanov
Colin @colinmoore
what is shane hollander doing shirtless on my tv rn
mac @hockeyfan1992
So shocked he's stopped using capital letters.
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 proper capitalization felt too straight for the thoughts in my head
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore bro😂
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 fucking LOOK AT HIM, MAN!
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore ...I'm seeing what you're saying.
ava @hollander35
i think i've finally fucking lost it because is that a RING ON THE CHAIN SHANE'S WEARING????
shayden @haydenhollander
i'm so lost. i don't know what to think, who to believe. mom pick me up i'm scared.
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hollander35 @haydenhollander i was so distracted looking at his abs i didn't even notice until you pointed it out
max @holla.nov2481
scott hunter saying "there's only one person I want wearing my jersey, Roz." is objectively insane
max @holla.nov2481
WHO ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, SIR?
lily @lilyhollander1221
not shane hollander.
mac @hockeyfan1992
I had to quit sports betting because I was losing all my money but I'd love to put a bet on who Scott Hunter wants wearing his jersey
mac @hockeyfan1992
Immediately changing my bet. Just scrolled past a clip of Hollander's face when Rozanov walked into the hall. That wasn't even sort of fucking subtle.
mac @hockeyfan1992
I might just be a Hollanov truther, guys. As the founding father of the Shott rumor, this is a dark day for me.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
hollander w a ring on his chain. hollander smiling at rozanov. rozanov blue screening when hollander smiled at him.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
hollander brushing his fingers against the ring after asking rozanov if he was ready to wear a hollander jersey. rozanov brushing his fingers against HIS CHAIN (even tho it was tucked into his shirt i KNOW it was there) before responding.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
we are SO UP, BITCHES. we have never been more back.
alice @hollanov
are we deadass doing a hollanov engagement rumor rn
alice @hollanov
it feels like 2013 up in this bitch. is ed sheeran about to tweet about his best friend getting married??
max @holla.nov2481
alexa play they don't know about us by one direction
alice @hollanov
i need to get a hobby other than shipping real human beings on the internet i think i'm starting to lose it
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
first line triple hatty celly🎉🥳
*attached video of Shane, Carter, and Luke getting WAY too into singing along to Midnight Memories (because Luke is still entirely convinced that Harry Styles/One Direction makes Shane play better ... and also because he accidentally fucked around and became a fan)*
ruby @hollanderNYC
the way this video's been up for less than five minutes and already has over a thousand likes...
kara @hunter21
@hollanderNYC i think our hockey boys have broken containment
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
hey @shanehollander where you at?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 why do you insist on communicating with me through twitter??
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@shanehollander because it's fun?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 sure. I'm waiting for Old Man Hunter to find his socks.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@shanehollander and you're not helping him? you know it's difficult for the elderly to see clearly.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander @vaughan19 I often think back on the days I met each of you and wonder how my life might've gone if I'd just walked the other way.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter oh shush, Scotty. You'd be bored without us.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander I hate when you're right.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter 😘
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
literally just got here and shay shay already wants to go home #sleepy
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis never call me that again you freak
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@haydpike35 can i call him holly??
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@luke15gillis if you have an assist in Games 1 and 2 next series, you can call him Holly.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@haydpike35 deal 🤝
@jeanjboiziau✪
joyeux anniversaire, capitaine❤️
@haydpike35 ✪
1. 
2. 
3. 
4. 
happy birthday, holly❤️
@roselandry ✪
1.
2. 
3. 
4. 
happy birthday @shanehollander love youuu xx
@scotthunter ✪
happy birthday, rook💙
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
happy birthday, hollzy @shanehollander
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Where and/or HOW the living fuck did you get that picture
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@shanehollander I have my ways.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Without the hearts this would look like a scene from a horror film @scotthunter @vaughan19 WHAT were you two plotting?
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@greghuffhockey we were just trying to get the legendary Shane Hollander to hang out with us???
Yuna @YunaHollander
Happy 26th birthday to my beautiful boy❤️ Love you, honey.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@YunaHollander thanks, Mom❤️ Love you too.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander is 26.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
DELETE THIS
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander no❤️
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@jackiepike help.
Jackie @jackiepike
@shanehollander no❤️
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Here's one for the Twitter crowd. Happy birthday, @shanehollander.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter why would you post this.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander you told me I should go home because I was 45 years old. It was a really bad chirp, very cute, though.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter I hate you so bad.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander no you don't❤️
kara @hunter21 🔁 Scott ✪ @scotthunter
we can't keep letting them get away with this.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander no you don't❤️
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hunter21 i personally think the NHL awards picture that I'm pretty sure is actually FROM hollander's rookie season that he posted on ig calling him 'Rook' is crazier.
kara @hunter21
@hollanderNYC if these two aren't together, i wish their partners strength. they are very quickly becoming the kerry washington and tony goldwyn of hockey.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
here's one for the twitter crowd. happy birthday, @shanehollander 😘😘
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@roselandry thank you, Rose. Love you❤️
alice @hollanov 🔁 rosie ✪ @roselandry
is he WEARING the ring here??? when is this picture from?? WHAT IS GOING ON
rosie ✪ @roselandry
here's one for the twitter crowd. happy birthday, @shanehollander 😘😘
alice @hollanov
also, WHY DOES THIS CAPTION MATCH SCOTT HUNTER'S??? what the FUCK is that supposed to mean??
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hollanov i think she was in NY this past week?? so maybe from then?? his hair looks the same length here as it does in recent interviews
alice @hollanov
@hollanderNYC i cannot believe we're at the point of analyzing his hair. i think i've finally gone BEYOND insane.
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hollanov it looks like the ring's on his right hand, though?? so maybe not an engagement ring?
alice @hollanov
@hollanderNYC just googled russian wedding ring traditions. i'm going outside to touch grass.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
happy birthday, roomie💙💙 @shanehollander
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
thanks, bud💙
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
hbd @shanehollander
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov thanks, Roz. See you soon wearing red in NY.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander UGH stop reminding me.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov no❤️
alice @hollanov
you two make it really fucking hard to act normal.
lily @lilyhollander1221
happy birthday to the beautiful, wonderful, incredible, sexy, amazing @shanehollander
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Yuna @YunaHollander
he is so gorgeous.
Yuna @YunaHollander
Happy 26th birthday to my beautiful boy❤️ Love you, honey.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@shanehollander i love you.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you for the birthday wishes, everyone💙
Chapter 30: you bring me home
Notes:
writing this from the passenger seat of my own car while my sister cycles between listening to hamilton, louis tomlinson, and dostoevsky's crime and punishment.
also the harry pics are actually from the ny v. montreal series in 2017 but we don't need to associate harry w montreal in this universe in any way.
i see people on the internet accusing me of AI and just know i am attempting to explode you with my mind. i hate AI so much. i am just on adderall and have an addictive personality and no projects at work rn.
Chapter Text
tessa @anchortattoo
i'm starting a #rumor
*screenshot of NYAdmirals post with video of Shane, Luke, and Carter singing along to Midnight Memories*
♥︎ @Harry_Styles liked this
☘️☘️ @princessshane
i'm starting a #RUMOR louder than the other rumor starters !!
alice @hollanov
actually what the fuck.
alice @hollanov
i don't have time for this. ilya is wearing shane's jersey to the game tonight. we cannot be involving harry FUCKING styles at the eleventh hour.
☘️☘️ @princessshane
@hollanov isn't that for a bet?
alice @hollanov 🔁 ☘️☘️ @princessshane
someone remind me that violence is wrong.
☘️☘️ @princessshane
@hollanov isn't that for a bet?
tessa @anchortattoo
okay, wait, i've made a list.
alice @hollanov
i'm afraid to ask ... a list of what?
tessa @anchortattoo
@hollanov every time Shane and Harry have been in the same place!
alice @hollanov 🔁 tessa @anchortattoo
i shouldn't have asked.
tessa @anchortattoo
@hollanov every time Shane and Harry have been in the same place!
alice @hollanov
i am WELL aware that i am insane for shipping hollanov. however, i am at least 45% less insane than whatever the FUCK is happening here.
💙💚 @princessLTpark
guys harry is in nyc rn ... odds he's going to the ny v. detroit game??
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 @ROZ81HOLLZY @holla.nov2481 help.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov what is happening?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov oh. i see now. we've lost the plot.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov @ROZ81HOLLZY what???
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@lilyhollander1221 ny first line broke containment. then the larries broke out of the psych ward.
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY i say let all these men kiss. however, the odds of SHANE HOLLANDER and HARRY STYLES are so fucking low we'd need a new word for impossible.
lily @lilyhollander1221
why is harry styles following my man
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@lilyhollander1221 probably because 'your man' is stupidly hot and harry styles has eyes
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@lilyhollander1221 that doesn't mean they're TOGETHER (i'm shouting so They can hear me)
lily @lilyhollander1221
i think @shanehollander should post more pictures from his Timid and GQ shoots and all of us should stop thinking about harry styles.
alice @hollanov
there's no way this works.
@shanehollander ✪
1. 
2. 
More from my shoot with Timid.
@hollander35 @colinmoore how are we feeling about this?
@colinmoore @hollander35 give me a second for my blood pressure to return to normal and i'll let you know
@machogan @colinmoore I see we're still avoiding proper capitalization
@colinmoore @machogan as if you're not seeing exactly what i'm seeing.@vaughanofficial✪ hollzy, baby, you gotta warn a guy before posting pictures like this.
@easybreezy✪ @calewagner51 this is also a thirst trap, btw.
@calewagner51✪ @easybreezy Yeah, buddy, I think I can see that.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 i apologize. i misjudged your reach.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov apology accepted.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@shanehollander now do GQ
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@GQMagazine
lily @lilyhollander1221
thank you.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander Holly 🥵🥵🥵
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
why are you thirst trapping on main i thought you were making breakfast.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis your breakfast has been ready for 20 minutes where even are you
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander definitely not taking sunny through the starbucks drive thru...
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis I swear if you stole my dog and ditched me to make breakfast alone and this doesn't end with you bringing me coffee I'm telling @scotthunter to make you bag skate.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@luke15gillis I'll listen to him
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter we're all well aware you'll listen to him
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander i have your boring coffee and i'm on the way home
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis my coffee isn't boring :(
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander stop lying.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 girl, what the fuck.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov 😏🤫
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
the way this implies that ilya KNOWS SHANE'S COFFEE ORDER #noticing
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander stop lying.
alice @hollanov
too much has happened today. i'm gonna go commune with nature.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
a bet's a bet
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander we are done making bets.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@ilyarozanov Hollzy's not on his phone but he told me to tell you to stop lying to yourself
max @holla.nov2481
look me in the eye and tell me that ilya rozanov isn't wearing a ring in that picture the admirals just posted.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
there's no fucking way.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Ryan @admirals1987
DOES THIS MEAN WHAT I THINK IT MEANS
ruby @hollanderNYC
@colinmoore what does he think it means?
Colin @colinmoore
@hollanderNYC the Lady Liberty jerseys are the Admirals' alternate (third) jersey that they only wear every once in awhile. You have to get permission from the League to wear your alternates so it's a little rare & usually exciting
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
this is funny bc the boys are BLASTING rock me in the locker room rn
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis singing "do you remember summer '09" with his whole chest meanwhile this is what he looked like in 2009
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
AMANDA DELETE THIS
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis no❤️
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@luke15gillis Boston?? Good to see you had taste at some point in your life.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@ilyarozanov if you don't leave me alone i'm telling shane to stop sending you pictures of sunny.
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
LUKE GILLIS = HOLLANOV SON.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@ilyarozanov if you don't leave me alone i'm telling shane to stop sending you pictures of sunny.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i'll post what shane looked like in '09 if they won't:
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis singing "do you remember summer '09" with his whole chest meanwhile this is what he looked like in 2009
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i'll post what shane looked like in '09 if they won't:
alice @hollanov
i'm having #thoughts about twitter user lilyhollander1221 but i'm gonna keep them to myself because they are certifiably insane.
alice @hollanov
the concept of shane hollander listening to rock me while ilya rozanov is in the same building wearing a hollander jersey.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game start @ msg!! i promised my boss i'd be normal about harry styles.
amanda @amanda.mccall
i did not, however, promise i would be normal about harry styles on my personal account :)
amanda @amanda.mccall
my close personal friend (truth.) shane hollander refuses to slide into harry styles' dms for me so i'm mad at him
☘️☘️ @princessshane
tell me why i'm actually watching hockey instead of just looking at clips after for the sole purpose of seeing harry styles watch a pretty man skate.
alice @hollanov
are you telling me you have a shane hollander fan account and you don't actually watch hockey?
☘️☘️ @princessshane
@hollanov that's exactly what i'm telling you.
alice @hollanov
@princessshane and it was HARRY STYLES that made you actually tune in?
☘️☘️ @princessshane
@hollanov yep.
alice @hollanov
@princessshane well ... whatever gets people into the game ig.
max @holla.nov2481
time to say something crazy!! 🤠🤠
max @holla.nov2481
camera just panned to rozanov in his hollander jersey and guess who he's sitting next to!!!!
max @holla.nov2481
if you guessed Very Hot Man, well done.
alice @hollanov
WHO IS DATING VERY HOT MAN. @ilyarozanov @scotthunter @shanehollander ONE OF YOU ANSWER.
alice @hollanov
i'm aware none of them will answer me (and i'm choosing to blame that on commissioner homophobe) but wouldn't it be fun if SOMEONE TOLD US WHAT WAS HAPPENING??
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
tied 0-0 at the end of the first
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
oh! yay!! scotty scored!!
NYC 1 - DET 0 | P2 14:51
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
1-0 at the end of the second :)
☘️☘️ @princessshane
i want this impossible rumor to be true because imagine how pretty they'd be.
alice @hollanov
i'd say i see your vision but i fear @lilyhollander1221 is about to explode anyone posting about this ship with their mind.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hollzy, baby, i love you. what a goal.
NYC 2 - DET 0 | P3 10:58
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@Harry_Styles agrees with me, btw.
amanda @amanda.mccall
testing how many times i can text shane to tell him harry styles cheered for his goal before his phone actually explodes in his locker
amanda @amanda.mccall
we're at 78 rn. will update.
gen @genevieve1998
@amanda.mccall i feel like hollander moved to NY and immediately went from life as an only child to having you and luke gillis as younger siblings
amanda @amanda.mccall
@genevieve1998 you are so right.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
2-0 at the end of the third!!! brb.
Detroit Red Wings ✪ @DetroitRedWings
Goal Carr!!
DET 1 - NYC 2 | P3 03:12
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
aaaaaand that's an NYA win!! see you in 2 days for game 2!!
game final: NYC 2 - DET 1
amanda @amanda.mccall
hs text update: i think i sent 158. his phone didn't explode, though.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@amanda.mccall it was 203 and I'm one text away from blocking your number.
Detroit Red Wings ✪ @DetroitRedWings
Game 2 Final: DET 3 - NYC 2, see you at home for Game 3!
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
hey @haydpike35 ik we lost but i assisted shane's goals for game 1 and 2 and scored one of my own tonight does this mean i can call him holly??
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@luke15gillis have at it, bud.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
IT'S NEW YORK, BABY!!!!
GAME 3 FINAL NYC 3 - DET 2
svetlana @svetrova
my best friend is getting married today♥︎
alice @hollanov
this cannot keep happening.
Chapter 31: every kiss, it gets a little sweeter
Notes:
apparently if you want to know what i’m like irl, it’s just amanda. i told my sister i didn’t know who i was channeling when i wrote amanda and she just went “…you. amanda is you.”
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
kara @hunter21 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
good morning ... just remembered this tweet. what is happening.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter we're all well aware you'll listen to him
@nyadmirals✪ (stories)
1. video clip of Luke jumping on Shane's back and yelling "Holly", you can hear Ilya saying "Luke" right before the video cuts out
2. picture of Shane, Yuna, David, and Sunny
3. video clip of Luke, still on Shane's back (starts after Shane saying Ilyusha) starts with Luke saying "I, personally, think her middle name should be Freddy." Shane looks at the camera in amusement, very Jim Halpert of him tbh. Shane says "Alright" and then drops Luke back onto his own feet. Luke takes Sunny from a person you cannot see (it's Ilya. it's like clearly fucking Ilya even though you can't actually see his face or hear his voice) and then sits on the floor. Sunny is crawling all over him, licking his face, etc. Shane says: “If it means that much to you that she has a middle name, I guess it can be Freddy.”
alice @hollanov
i don't have the energy to be crazy about this rn but that was so seriously ilya rozanov in the background of those videos the admirals just posted to their insta stories.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
she finally has a middle name, guys
meet Sunday Freddy Hollander (@shanehollander let me pick her middle name 😁)
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@luke15gillis what was she doing on your bathroom counter?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter she wanted to be there?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
today is may 19th. today we will beat detroit. on may 19th we will beat detroit. (is this how manifesting works?)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Captain Scott with the first goal of the game!
NYC 1 - DET 0 | P1 15:09
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
and with a beautiful assist from Gilly, Hollzy brings us up to two
NYC 2 - DET 0 | P1 08:14
max @holla.nov2481
shane hollander just kissed his glove and then tapped it to his chest after scoring. his chest where there is a chain holding a ring.
max @holla.nov2481
there's no way on God's green earth that the camera just panned over to show ILYA ROZANOV at this game IN DETROIT sitting next to SHANE HOLLANDER'S PARENTS right after shane KISSED HIS RING
alice @hollanov
ilya rozanov,
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hey @ilyarozanov we see you in the crowd. no hollzy jersey this time?? we can fix that, just let us know.
max @holla.nov2481
oh jesus christ i'm never going to be normal about anything ever again.
alice @hollanov
the winds have shifted. the voices are whispering. i sense the truth.
max @holla.nov2481
you sound psychotic, just btw
alice @hollanov
@holla.nov2481 i am WELL fucking aware
alice @hollanov
@holla.nov2481 but one day, my day will come. on that day i will be vindicated.
max @holla.nov2481
alright girl
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
that's 2-0 at the end of the first!!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
(it's us) (from intermission)
amanda @amanda.mccall
no one is allowed to ask me to act normal rn
gen @genevieve1998
we would never ask you to act normal, queen.
amanda @amanda.mccall
@genevieve1998 thank god.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GILLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!! (luke scored)
NYC 3 - DET 0 | P2 11:53
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GREG HUFF BABY
NYC 4 - DET 0 | P2 02:31
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
4-0 at the end of the second!!!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
(from intermission) (again)
ava @hollander35
is the ny admirals admin okay?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollander35 she seems like she's having the time of her life to me
amanda @amanda.mccall
@ROZ81HOLLZY oh i absolutely am.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
shane hollander just scored and can i just say?
NYC 5 - DET 0 | P3 05:18
alice @hollanov
that does not say that he just scored at minute 05:18
alice @hollanov
THAT DOES NOT SAY THAT
mac @hockeyfan1992
@hollanov I think it does?? Are you okay?
alice @hollanov
@hockeyfan1992 i am connecting dots that have never once been connected before and the universe is on my side.
alice @hollanov
alice @hollanov
if shane kisses the ring again i'm throwing myself a party
alice @hollanov
oh, shane hollander, i see you. i am on your wave length. no one will ever believe me but i believe me.
alice @hollanov
Colin @colinmoore
@hollanov are you okay?
alice @hollanov
@colinmoore i have never once been better.
Colin @colinmoore
@hollanov care to share with the class?
alice @hollanov
@colinmoore no❤️
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
ANOTHER ADMIRALS WIN, FRIENDS. BACK IN NY FOR GAME FIVE LET'S GET 'ER DONE.
Notes:
just as an update like an hour after i posted this: i am half drunk and crashing THE FUCK out over hudson williams. he needs to stop moving for 10 minutes i can’t do this anymore.
Chapter 32: forever night stand
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
a little post-win captain cuddle
*attached photo of Scott, Shane, and Carter in Shane's bed. Scott is laying down on his side on Shane's left with his arm wrapped tightly around Shane's waist. Shane is propped up against the pillows turned slightly toward Carter making it look like Shane and Scott are about 4 seconds away from fully spooning with Scott's forehead pressed against Shane's bicep, miraculously covering up Ilya's number that is embroidered into the sleeve of the hoodie Shane is wearing. Shane's right arm has somehow ended up around Carter's shoulders. Carter has his head on Shane's chest with his arm resting lightly on top of Scott's. Shane's head is resting on top of Carter's and his left hand is holding onto the iPad which is still playing game tape.*
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@scotthunter @shanehollander @vaughan19 I'm feeling left out.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@greghuffhockey all you missed was at least one of them LOUDLY snoring and then all of them proclaiming that they don't snore and fighting over which one of them it was. trust me, i was in the other bed.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@luke15gillis the snoring was @scotthunter. Trust me, I've roomed with him enough times.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@greghuffhockey well, i knew it wasn't shane.
Ryan @admirals1987
Starting to think the secret to NY's success isn't the fact that the roster is absolutely stacked with talent, it's that the captains have somehow morphed into a single being.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game 5 v. detroit tn boys.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
they're on the ice for warmups👍
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
someone tell me why @luke15gillis is climbing on top of the goal to talk to @bennettofficial instead of circling around like a normal human
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
oh, nevermind, it appears he knew something i didn't because the rest of the first line is now crowded around the front of the goal.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
still not quite sure why gilly couldn't just join them on the ice, but to each their own.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
as a reminder, the series sits at NYC 3 - DET 1.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
aaaaand puck drop.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis scored
NYC 1 - DET 0 | P1 01:57
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 1 - DET 0 at the end of the first!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
THAT'S A SCOTT HUNTER GOAL BABY
NYC 2 - DET 0 | P2 11:43
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
this picture is the cover of the locker room playlist btw
Ryan @admirals1987
@NYAdmirals now we gotta see this playlist
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@admirals1987 sneak peak😉😉
gen @genevieve1998
@NYAdmirals now that is an eclectic mix of music
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@genevieve1998 it gets worse :)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
2-0 at the end of the second, we'll brb
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander if u really think about it.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
oh, hollzy scored btw.
NYC 3 - DET 0 | P3 16:12
ava @hollander35
shane hollander as snoopy makes too much sense and i hate that i didn't consider that before.
shayden @haydenhollander
no, because this is actually him.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYA VICTORYYYYY | NYC 3 - DET 0
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
WE'RE GOING TO THE FINALS BABY
Notes:
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1KRPWQtRi8x4opW4Ohru7J?si=nGzcaZGuTrOtPcHJeULyhw&pi=bWKn1Lo1Tl6Q9
Chapter 33: violet shrinking down
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game 1 Final | NYC 1 – LOS 2
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game 2 Final | NYC 2 – LOS 3
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game 3 Final | NYC 2 – LOS 1 :)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game four starting in FIVE MINUTES PEOPLE
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
oh btw if @shanehollander puts up a point tonight he'll break another record.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
which, if you're keeping count, would be his fourth broken playoff record this season.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
he broke the record for most goals scored in a single playoff game in Game 3 v. Montreal
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
he broke the record for the longest single-season goal streak during Game 6 v. Boston (and beat it by 2 in game 2 v. Detroit)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
he broke the record for most goals scored in a single playoff year during game 4 v. Detroit (and he's still going)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
if he puts up a point, either a goal or an assist, tonight he'll break the record for the single-season playoff point streak (his goal streak ended during Game 3 v. Detroit, but he still had an assist, so the point streak remains)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
also, @Cosmopolitan just named him the NHL's hottest player. again. which is beside the point, but i felt it was important to note.
Ryan @admirals1987
I think letting the Admirals social media admin loose might've been the best decision the team made this year other than acquiring Hollander.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@admirals1987 thanks, king <3
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
this is the important stat.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
also, @Cosmopolitan just named him the NHL's hottest player. again. which is beside the point, but i felt it was important to note.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
@CIA @FBI @POTUS @Pontifex @UN one of you figure out where this girl is getting unseen pictures of shane hollander.
lily @lilyhollander1221
this is the important stat.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@ROZ81HOLLZY can't a girl have a secret?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@lilyhollander1221 no.
max @holla.nov2481
...does he have a hickey on his neck in that picture??
lily @lilyhollander1221
@holla.nov2481 no.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
cosmo's hottest hockey player just won the face off.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
and that's a vaughny goal (beautiful assist gilly)
NYC 1 - LOS 0 | P1 18:34
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
ATTA BOY WAGNER.
NYC 2 - LOS 0 | P1 03:11
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
2-0 at the end of the first :)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
SCOTTY, BABY, WELL DONE.
NYC 3 - LOS 0 | P2 11:19
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
3-0 at the end of the second💪💪💪
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
they just scored...
NYC 3 - LOS 1 | P3 16:58
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
whoever invented duvet covers needs to die.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@ilyarozanov whose chores are you doing?
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@marlowofficial not yours.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
goal @shanehollander. that's another record people.
NYC 4 - LOS 1 | P3 05:43
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game 4 Final | NYC 4 – LOS 1
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game 5 Final | NYC 2 – LOS 0, see you in NYC for Game 6 :)
Chapter 34: where's the trophy?
Notes:
the detroit red wings are getting the shit edited out of them bc their jerseys are the closest to the admirals😂😂
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the city's lit up for game six #Admirals🗽
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the kids are ready
*attached video starting with Shane adjusting Luke's shoulder pads. Tipsy starts playing and Shane laughs as Luke and Breezy start singing, they're joined by Cameron and Nick. In the background you can see Shane at his locker pulling on his jersey while Scott smiles at him, they're talking in low tones, heads bent together. Scott ruffle's Shane's hair once his head pops out of his jersey and Shane shakes his head, a fond smile on his face.*
kara @hunter21
there is too much happening in this video for me to begin commenting on.
mac @hockeyfan1992
I might be back on the Shott agenda. They make even a locker room look domestic.
shayden @haydenhollander
shane adjusting luke's pads😭😭😭 jesus christ i love them.
Ryan @admirals1987
@ MSG for Game 6 and while I am mostly here for the hockey, I couldn't help but notice that Ilya Rozanov, Hayden Pike, and the guy twitter calls Very Hot Man are all sitting together.
Zach @zachariah.zach
Now that's an interesting assortment of people.
Ryan @admirals1987
@zachariah.zach Hollander's parents are sitting with them too. It's Pike, Rozanov, and the Hollanders in a row and VHM and two adults that might be his parents and a girl who seems to be his friend in front of them.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
real question: how are you supposed to win a ship war when the people you're shipping seem to have created a fucking harem?
shayden @haydenhollander
@ROZ81HOLLZY incredible question. i do not know.
lily @lilyhollander1221
there is no harem. shane is mine and i do not share.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@lilyhollander1221 sometimes i can't tell whether or not you're joking.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@ROZ81HOLLZY i'm not.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
game start.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
CALE WAGNER WITH THE FIRST GOAL OF THE GAME
NYC 1 - LOS 0 | P1 01:48
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 1 - LOS 0 at the end of the first.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
... los angeles just scored ...
NYC 1 - LOS 1 | P2 18:52
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
oh, everything's fine, hollzy scored 😄
NYC 2 - LOS 1 | P2 14:12
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i take it back. nothing's fine.
NYC 2 - LOS 2 | P2 11:37
kara @hunter21
ads-admin?? are you okay???
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@hunter21 no :)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYC 2 - LOS 2 at the end of the 2nd.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
that's a lot of 2s. huh.
amanda @amanda.mccall
genuinely how do i still have a job.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we are back for the third!
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
New York's Matti Jalo issued a two-minute minor for tripping. Los Angeles on the powerplay.
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
New York has killed the powerplay. Both teams at full power.
NBC Sports Hockey ✪ @NBCSportsHockey
Los Angeles' Cole Hendrix issued a two-minute minor for roughing. New York on the powerplay, 2:03 remains in regulation, the game is tied 2-2.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
second unit has been pulled, first unit now in play.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
AND THAT'S A HOLLANDER GOAL.
NYC 3 - LOS 2 | P3 00:47
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
OH. OH MY GOD. SCOTT HUNTER GOAL.
NYC 4 - LOS 2 | P3 00:29
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
LUKE GILLIS WITH THE BUZZER BEATER.
NYC 5 - LOS 2 | P3 00:01
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
💙🗽❤️
ava @hollander35
luke jumping on shane's back to celebrate killed me dead they are SO adorable
shayden @haydenhollander
that is his child for real. i love them so much.
3x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
guess it's time to update my name 🏆🏆🏆
Colin @colinmoore
oh thank fucking christ everyone finally developed a brain.
Colin @colinmoore
that trophy should've been Hollander's TWO YEARS AGO YOU DICKS
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore are you okay? 😂
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 not even a little bit.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Conn Smythe Winner Shane Hollander ❤️🗽
ava @hollander35
there's no way in hell i just watched shane hollander throw himself at hayden pike on live television.
ava @hollander35
oh and now he's picking him up and spinning him around. right. very platonic behavior, lads.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@hollander35 lads? Are you British?
ava @hollander35
@hockeyfan1992 no i just stayed up too late reading marauders fanfiction.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@hollander35 dare I ask?
ava @hollander35
@hockeyfan1992 we've already ruined your life by introducing you to shayden and hollanov i'm not going to ruin it more by introducing you to wolfstar.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
YOUR NEW YORK ADMIRALS ARE STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS 🏆🗽❤️
kara @hunter21
hey ... uh ... real talk everyone ... wtf is scott hunter doing??
kara @hunter21
shane and carter look SCARED but also somehow supportive??? what is HAPPENING.
gen @genevieve1998
am i watching a rom com rn?? ESPN is taping whatever is happening like it's the airport scene from love actually.
gen @genevieve1998
IS THAT VERY HOT MAN???
mac @hockeyfan1992
There's no way.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Scott, man, I JUST got back on the Shott agenda!
shayden @haydenhollander
the camera for ABC's broadcast is on shane and hayden right now and shane looks actually fucking heartbroken what is going on.
shayden @haydenhollander
this is NOT a shott post i s2g. i'm just like seriously confused by his face.
ava @hollander35
idk if he looks 'heartbroken' per se ... more like wistful??
ava @hollander35
i mean, not to speculate, but if he IS queer in any way, i'd bet there are a LOT of feelings watching your friend come out publicly. especially if there were some reason you COULDN'T.
alice @hollanov
did rozanov just disappear into thin air?? like he was with the hollanders wasn't he?? where tf did he go?
brett @brettnash
well ... this explains a lot.
brett @brettnash
i'm happy for you, Very Hot Man. just not from the very bottom of my heart.
brett @brettnash
so glad some man gets to kiss scott hunter!!! i just wish it were ME
walt @lancewalter
real.
shayden @haydenhollander
this hug made me cry real tears. the relief is actually palpable. congrats, @scotthunter. you deserve all the love❤️🏳️🌈
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
❤️🗽💙
Notes:
everyone meet my beta reader, millie.
Chapter 35: he just comes running over to me
Notes:
we can all assume there were homophobic assholes saying mean things about scott. i'm going to pretend those assholes do not exist in our little slice of the internet because writing mean things about scott makes me sad.
also, i meant to have this posted earlier but then my dad asked me to do a puzzle and i got locked tf in.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we love you, Cap #LoveWins🏳️🌈
GLAAD ✪ @glaad
@NYAdmirals win, Love Wins.
Congrats on the Cup, @scotthunter 🏳️🌈❤️
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
🥂🎉🗽❤️
*attached video of Shane walking into the locker room, his jersey is rucked up and tucked into his compression shirt, showing a good portion of his abs, his hair is a total disaster and he's grinning like he's about half drunk. Ilya walks into the room a step behind him, his hair is noticeably messy and he looks smugger than usual (which is saying something). Tommy Andersson & Eric Bennett pick Shane up a second after he walks in. The video is focused on those three, mostly on Shane who's smiling and cheering, but in the background you can see Luke jump on Ilya's back, Ilya laughs, his whole face lighting up with it. Luke says something that's entirely inaudible over the noise (telling Ilya he's happy that Ilya's there) and then knocks their heads together, hugs Ilya from behind, and then drops back down to his feet, the two then disappear from frame.*
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
...i don't even know where to start
kara @hunter21
am i insane or does hollander look like he just got fucked?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hunter21 if you're insane then so am i.
max @holla.nov2481
i would bet my entire savings account on the reason why hollanov walked in together.
max @holla.nov2481
also. luke gillis = hollanov son.
Colin @colinmoore
it's entirely possible that shane hollander has never looked better.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore I feel like you're no longer questioning.
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 what tipped you off?
☘️☘️ @princessshane
@Harry_Styles come get your man
Ryan @admirals1987
Is Ilya Rozanov ... smiling?? What is happening?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
winning's a family affair ❤️❤️
*photo of Scott kissing Shane's cheek, Luke is leaning against Shane's side openly laughing. Kip is slightly out of focus but still recognizable, he's clearly amused and overwhelmingly fond. Hayden is clearly visible and is glaring absolute daggers at Scott, Ilya is next to him less glaring, more looking distinctly murderous.*
kara @hunter21
they HAVE to know what they're doing posting this specific photo, right?
gen @genevieve1998
@hunter21 if they don't they're just REALLY good at unintentionally stirring the pot.
ava @hollander35
oh there's no fucking way.
*screenshot of admiral's 'family affair' tweet that says 'liked by @Harry_Styles*
shayden @haydenhollander
what goddamn timeline are we living in.
ruby @hollanderNYC
@haydenhollander who knows but i hope we keep living in it.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
safety first :)
brett @brettnash
every time i go to this bar one or more admirals show up.
brett @brettnash
the fucking Stanley Cup is in an East Village gay bar i think i've accidentally tripped into an alternate dimension
brett @brettnash
oh! my god. yeah. this is an alternate dimension. there's no other explanation for what i'm seeing right now.
kara @hunter21
???????
brett @brettnash
i think all of these men have surpassed drunk because there's literally no other explanation for the fact that shane hollander is currently sitting in ilya rozanov's lap.
alice @hollanov
BE MORE SUBTLE OR IM GONNA FUCKING LOSE IT.
J.J. ✪ @jeanjboiziau
my best friend is a 3x stanley cup champ :)
rosie ✪ @roselandry
he's actually MY best friend!! (told him i wouldn't post this) (i lied)
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
you're all wrong. he's my best friend. (i also told him i wouldn't post this) (i also lied)
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@scotthunter he's looking at me in this picture, dinosaur.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
also. i'm sitting next to him right now and he says i am his best friend so you can all give up.
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
rozanov's right. hollzy told us months ago that roz was his best friend.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
to be specific: he said his russian guard dog best friend was assigned to him by the league
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@nick29muller why do you remember the direct quote?
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
it was the first time i heard shane hollander tell a joke. it was memorable.
alice @hollanov 🔁 Scott ✪ @scotthunter
WTF DID ILYA MEAN SHANE WAS LOOKING AT HIM IN THIS PICTURE?
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
you're all wrong. he's my best friend. (i also told him i wouldn't post this) (i also lied)
alice @hollanov
i want to be normal SO bad but these two make it fucking IMPOSSIBLE.
alice @hollanov
JUST A LITTLE SUBTLETY YOU TWO. PLEASE.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i'm feeling super normal about shane saying ilya is his best friend. super normal. totally, completely normal.
walt @lancewalter
went outside to smoke and saw this through the window ... HUH?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i'm now feeling decidedly less normal :)
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 get on here and defend yourself.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov wth does lily have to defend?
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY lily knows.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov 😘
alice @hollanov
lily @lilyhollander1221
my man just won the stanley for the third year in a row.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
...do any of you ever get the vibe that lily knows shane personally.
alice @hollanov
yes.
brett @brettnash
i honestly don't think i've ever experienced a drunker group of people than the new york admirals at this very moment.
brett @brettnash
tell me why i just overheard a group of them saying they should buy the bar
brett @brettnash
i don't think they were kidding.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
If anyone's wondering why you're not getting more unhinged Tweets rn it's because @shanehollander and @amanda.mccall have started stealing people's phones
amanda @amanda.mccall
@greghuffhockey you people make my job hard enough without you having free range access to the internet after consuming your body weights in alcohol
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@amanda.mccall I'll behave
gen @genevieve1998 🔁 vivian @vivpeterson06
just awake staring into the dark thinking about this.
vivian @vivpeterson06
i'm staying at the same hotel as the NHL All Stars rn & someone tell me why i just watched shane hollander and scott hunter leave the bar together
gen @genevieve1998
genuinely wtf is up with hunter and hollander if they're NOT dating.
gen @genevieve1998
it's giving this:
kara @hunter21
i said the same thing man. those two need to sort their shit out 😂😂
mac @hockeyfan1992 🔁 mac @hockeyfan1992
I was kinda right.
mac @hockeyfan1992
The Admirals are really going to win the Cup this year on the power of friendship and Shane Hollander's dog alone.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
goodnight :)
vivian @vivpeterson06
did scott hunter really just win the stanley cup, come out on national television, and post nothing except a picture of the cup tucked into bed?
gen @genevieve1998
it appears so.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@jackiepike can you come retrieve your husband and hollander?
Jackie @jackiepike
@ilyarozanov what did they do now?
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@jackiepike they are chasing a pigeon down the street. i'm scared one of them is actually going to catch it.
Jackie @jackiepike
@ilyarozanov that's tame. i had to fish them out of the river on shane's 20th.
amanda @amanda.mccall
cannot believe i have to corral them for press this morning. this is torture. this is cruel and unusual punishment.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
this is how pike, rozanov, and hollander woke up this morning (shane's the cat btw)
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Please finish getting dressed we are so late.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Though I will admit this is painfully accurate.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
However, you woke up on the floor using one of Sunny's blankets even though there's a pile of human sized blankets in our living room so I feel like you don't have a lot of room to talk.
mac @hockeyfan1992
My new theory is that none of them are dating except Hunter and his boyfriend (Kip?) and they're all just weirdly close friends.
shayden @haydenhollander
i see your theory and raise you shayden but, for some unknown reason, they've befriended ilya rozanov.
alice @hollanov
@haydenhollander i love it when you say such horrifically incorrect things with so much confidence
Notes:
guys which of will smith hockey’s evil situationships should we cast as drew.
Chapter 36: let our friends crash in the living room
Notes:
so sad the were you silent or silenced? thing didn't happen until 2021 ... just know that if it'd happened pre-2017, someone would've used it for luke when shane cut him off before he could say the word 'married'
Chapter Text
MONDAY
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
this is where i'm at today.
ava @hollander35
i really don't know how to react to gillis saying that ilya, shane, AND hayden all woke up cuddled together.
max @holla.nov2481
i don't think any of us know how to react to that.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
good morning from times square!
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
tuning into good morning america because there's no way this goes well.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
spot the difference
picture of carter, luke, and shane 'sleeping' in the lobby next to this photo:
ruby @hollanderNYC
just a big ol cuddle pile
alice @hollanov
the camera just cut to the admirals ... this feels like a form of torture why are they forcing these guys to be awake😂
alice @hollanov
luke is fully asleep.
*short video of a TV screen showing Luke sitting on the floor between Shane's legs, his head is resting on Shane's thigh and his eyes are closed, clearly asleep while Shane is mindlessly playing with his hair, you can hear Carter answering a question in the background*
mac @hockeyfan1992
The way Hollander has Hunter, Gillis, AND Bennett using him as a pillow right now is absolutely hilarious.
ava @hollander35
...there's no way i heard that right.
shayden @haydenhollander
"now we have a stepdad?" is KILLING ME when did this become an episode of dr. phil😂
mac @hockeyfan1992
I feel vindicated in my Shott shipping knowing their entire team was in it with me.
Ryan @admirals1987
"we all thought he was dating hollzy" oh dear lord.
ava @hollander35
here's my question: WHY did they all think he was dating shane?? what made them think that was a possibility??
alice @hollanov
here's what we're not gonna do: speculate on people's sexualities in a way that brings it into reality. there's a line and this crosses it.
ava @hollander35
@hollanov your whole account is dedicated to speculating on two people's sexuality??
alice @hollanov
@hollander35 my whole account is shipping two players for shits and gigs. not questioning whether or not one of them might've let his team in on a deeply personal secret.
alice @hollanov
oh, luke gillis, my sweet summer child, never change.
brett @brettnash
based on how much i saw these men drink last night, nothing that's happening right now is surprising.
ruby @hollanderNYC
shane just cutting luke off😂😂 what could he POSSIBLY have been about to say?
☘️☘️ @princessshane
call me crazy but i'm about 95% sure he was about to say the word "married"
ruby @hollanderNYC
i think i can get on this level of crazy. life's more fun with marriage rumors.
Ryan @admirals1987
Is Hollander the only person who passed media training? This is gold.
ELI @elliot1999
Official petition to have the Admirals horrifically hungover on live TV every single morning.
Levi @levicarlson25
I'd pay to see that, this is hilarious.
Micah @micahtaylor64
If this is what they look like hungover, I cannot WAIT to see footage of them during the parade.
SiriusXM ✪ @SIRIUSXM
tune into Andy Cohen Live (channel 102) tomorrow at 3 pm EST to hear from @shanehollander
alice @hollanov
shane hollander on the radio 🙏🙏 booked & busy post-win press 🙏🙏 we prayed for times like these.
TUESDAY
BuzzFeed ✪ @BuzzFeed
🏒🏒
BuzzFeed ✪ @BuzzFeed
you'll never guess who we have in the studio right now (video on Thursday)
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
PLEASE if there's a God out there, let it be who i'm thinking it is🙏🙏🙏
max @holla.nov2481
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
kara @hunter21
...odds they're doing thirst tweets??
SiriusXM ✪ @SIRIUSXM
playoff MVP in the building🏒🏒
ruby @hollanderNYC
somehow i forget how beautiful this man is every single time.
kara @hunter21
whoever's been doing his hair deserves a tender kiss on the forehead and maybe also a big ol kiss on the mouth.
amanda @amanda.mccall
@hunter21 today it was @ilyarozanov and he says thank you but no thank you.
kara @hunter21 🔁 amanda @amanda.mccall
hey, so ... huh??
amanda @amanda.mccall
@hunter21 today it was @ilyarozanov and he says thank you but no thank you.
alice @hollanov
do you two not understand the word "subtle" or have you purposefully forgotten it? genuinely wondering.
lily @lilyhollander1221
pretty freckles, pretty hair, pretty boy.
alice @hollanov
it's like you want me to suffer.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov 😘
alice @hollanov
listening to the actual fucking radio like it's 2006 again. the things i do for this man.
☘️☘️ @princessshane
shane hollander is a cutie even when you can't see his face i love him so bad.
☘️☘️ @princessshane
he's talking about living with luke and how great it's been having a brother i'm gonna sob😭😭
Colin @colinmoore
It's still a novel experience hearing Shane Hollander with actual joy in his voice.
Colin @colinmoore
Thank God I go to school in NY and I can bandwagon without feeling bad about it
Colin @colinmoore
Farewell, MTL, you suck.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore are you seriously abandoning your hometown team?
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 you know this. I told you this. Why are you making me repeat it?
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore the people need to know!
kara @hunter21
@colinmoore yeah! the people need to know!
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 you suck. @hunter21 fine, yes, consider the Voyageurs abandoned.
Andy Cohen ✪ @Andy
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
thank you @SIRIUSXM and @Andy for hosting @shanehollander
ruby @hollanderNYC
this picture ... i'm having heart palpitations
ruby @hollanderNYC
also i know we've already talked extensively about the ring but i feel the need to mention it one more time.
kara @hunter21
the thing's a fucking honing beacon in that picture how are we NOT supposed to mention it?
amanda @amanda.mccall
idk why i agreed to let shane drive me around i think i'm gonna die.
amanda @amanda.mccall
i'm going to die while russian club music is pumping through the speakers of this jeep like the volume is being sourced from the center of the fucking earth
mac @hockeyfan1992
@amanda.mccall Hollander listens to Russian club music?
amanda @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 no.
ruby @hollanderNYC
am i to understand that the admiral's social media manager is driving around with hollander and ...someone who listens to russian music?
kara @hunter21
and, apparently, rozanov was responsible for hollander's hair.
ruby @hollanderNYC
i need to create a physical conspiracy board.
alice @hollanov
@hollanderNYC don't. it'll take over your room, your life, and your sanity.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
just realized my account was still public. oops.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
now that that's taken care of: shane is fully hiding in my office rn because he thinks it'll stop management from roping him into more media appearances.
ruby @hollanderNYC
i think admin just made her account private😂 should've followed while i had the chance.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
holly baby does not want to be here.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Currently very thankful I followed you after that one project we did together in college😂
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 you are one of my elite employees.
Men's Health Mag ✪ @MensHealthMag
@NYAdmirals Alternate Captain Shane Hollander walks us through his playoff routine
🎥 tomorrow.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
i do not know how men's health is going to have this video ready by TOMORROW.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
like either this video is going to have no sound, their editors are going to be up all night, or the world is going to hear ilya rozanov's ENTIRE repertoire of shane hollander chirps.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
fingers crossed for option three🤞🤞
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@luke15gillis anyone ever tell you you're a shit disturber?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@amanda.mccall yes.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Cap live on @BravoTV tonight!!
Bravo ✪ @BravoTV
thanks for joining us @scotthunter
Ryan @admirals1987
First Shane Hollander got a personality and now Scott Hunter?? What's next? Ilya Rozanov is actually a nice person?
Colin @colinmoore
@admirals1987 you mean the guy who Saint Hollander has openly admitted is his best friend?? I think you might be right on the nose.
Ryan @admirals1987
@colinmoore ...you've got me there.
kara @hunter21
whoever put scott hunter in that green suit i owe you my life.
kara @hunter21
also whoever agreed to him going on this show i love when they let the hockey robots loose. it hits every time.
Andy Cohen ✪ @Andy
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
they really have shane and scott booked and busy jesus christ
WEDNESDAY
Men's Health Mag ✪ @MensHealthMag
Shane Hollander, 3x Stanley Cup Champion, shows us his playoff routine:
max @holla.nov2481
oh jesus fucking christ i need to sit down.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
happy birthday, Captain @ilyarozanov
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
the editor cut the sound bite out, but for those of you lucky enough to follow this account:
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
this is his reaction to rozanov saying shane should stop nagging him about smoking because ilya can still lift more than him.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
this is a daily argument btw
svetlana @svetrova
с днем рождения, Илюша♥︎
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
спасибо, Света❤️❤️ люблю тебя
svetlana @svetrova
♥︎♥︎♥︎
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
happy birthday, @ilyarozanov
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you, Hollander💙
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
when the hell is this picture from?? shane's hair is short and his ears aren't pierced. this has to be from before he left Montreal??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
happy birthday, @ilyarozanov
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@holla.nov2481 and it's clearly not winter so, call me crazy, but that picture's from at least last year.
alice @hollanov
carter vaughan posted this picture during all star weekend last year (2016) and it looks like its from the same day??
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov well ... at least it'd make sense for them to have been in the same place??
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@ilyarozanov happy birthday
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you, Marly
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
he just about killed us with really fucking loud music like 2 minutes after this picture was taken but it is his birthday...
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
oh, you survived. you're fine.
mac @hockeyfan1992
you picked a good time to make this account private.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 i sure think so.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i had a busy morning so i am just now seeing shane's workout video...
lily @lilyhollander1221
i don't think anyone has ever looked so adorable and fuckable at the same time. it's impressive.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i want him to suffocate me with those thighs.
lily @lilyhollander1221
or maybe by his bicep. i can't decide.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Happy birthday, Roz. @ilyarozanov.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
awwwww💙💙 thank you, old man🦖🦖
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@ilyarozanov ugh I take it back.
Men's Health Mag ✪ @MensHealthMag
tomorrow: @NYAdmirals Captain Scott Hunter walks us through his playoff routine
kara @hunter21
wtf did men do to deserve him.
3x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
there are too many things happening at once i am overwhelmed.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
happy birthday @ilyarozanov
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you, Gilly🤍🤍
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
this isn't fair. where are you guys?? @nick29muller and i want to celebrate mob roz's birthday too!!
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@CameronMcCormick too bad! family only😈😈
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis why do you lie?? @CameronMcCormick check your texts, buddy.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
@shanehollander ...oops. see you soon.
alice @hollanov
...right, okay, that's normal.
Yuna @YunaHollander
happy birthday, @ilyarozanov 🤍
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you @YunaHollander, люблю тебя🤍
alice @hollanov
nevermind.
ruby @hollanderNYC
...did ....... did?? did ilya rozanov just tell shane hollander's mom he loves her in russian??
gen @genevieve1998
@hollanderNYC you're missing the part where shane hollander's mom posted for ilya rozanov's birthday in the first place.
ruby @hollanderNYC
@genevieve1998 you're right, that is an important part.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
happy birthday mob roz!! @ilyarozanov
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
MOB ROZ BIRTHDAY MOB ROZ BIRTHDAY MOB ROZ BIRTHDAY @ilyarozanov :)
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
what could POSSIBLY be the context of this photo?
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
@ROZ81HOLLZY @scotthunter almost ate shit.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@brisebois38 ...that makes an odd amount of sense.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@brisebois38 you're the worst.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
happy birthday @ilyarozanov ...i'd search for a better picture but i'm lazy and you're standing right in front of me so here
alice @hollanov
WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW??
alice @hollanov
did the entire fucking team just get dosed with hollanov pills??? what is going ON
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
this picture alone could feed us for a century sweet god
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
happy birthday @ilyarozanov ...i'd search for a better picture but i'm lazy and you're standing right in front of me so here
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i'll get back to yall in 3-5 business days i need a minute.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial come retrieve your best friend he's corrupting my team
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@shanehollander when you say "corrupting"...??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial they're all calling me slow.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@shanehollander I expected so much worse.
THURSDAY
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
so much was happening last night i didn't even have time to process the insanity of this tweet. what could that POSSIBLY mean.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@CameronMcCormick too bad! family only😈😈
max @holla.nov2481
this is my luke gillis = hollanov son confirmation. i don't need anything else.
SiriusXM ✪ @SIRIUSXM
@scotthunter on Morning MashUp.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@SIRIUSXM thank you for having me!
BuzzFeed ✪ @BuzzFeed
@shanehollander and @scotthunter reading thirst tweets live on YouTube NOW!!
alice @hollanov
oh there is no way they got one of @lilyhollander1221's tweets 😂😂
alice @hollanov
@shanehollander hiding from the lily tweet like that'd make it better.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov this was hands down the funniest part of the video
max @holla.nov2481
all of them saying "we know lily" like they actually know her personally instead of just knowing her account😂
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@holla.nov2481 i'll be so for real, i'm REALLY starting to think they DO know lily personally.
max @holla.nov2481
@ROZ81HOLLZY ...i don't have time to process that.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i feel famous.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 you are OBJECTIVELY famous.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov you know too much.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 i know nothing.
kara @hunter21
anyone else kind of loving the fact that scott's hardly been asked any questions about coming out?? everyone's just asking him about hockey.
alice @hollanov
i also noticed that and appreciate it A LOT. like if he wants to talk about it, he's being given the platform, but he's also not being forced. it's very refreshing.
alice @hollanov
the timeline is full of hollanov, Those people have been quiet since yesterday, the sun is shining, the birds are chirping. i love my life.
Men's Health Mag ✪ @MensHealthMag
Scott Hunter walks us through his playoff routine
kara @hunter21
genuinely ... what did men do to deserve all this???
lily @lilyhollander1221
pretty strong for an old man.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
oh go back to thirsting over shane.
Chapter 37: sunshine on the street at the parade
Notes:
the scott out magazine cover is LOOSELY based on the cover tom daley did :)
also, we're all just going to pretend that françois' hair is the same length in all of these pictures.
also also, the rangers haven't won the cup since 1994 so i was high key limited w/ parade pics so some of these are from the women's world cup parade... go usa (soccer, specifically, not the country. i am sick and tired of this country.)
Chapter Text
FRIDAY
@outmagazine ✪
For someone who's spent most of his life fiercely protecting his privacy, the past week has been a whirlwind for @nyadmirals Captain @scotthunter. Out's July/August cover star Scott Hunter takes us on a heartfelt journey through perseverance, friendship, and honesty.
From his 2014 Olympic Gold to his team's record-breaking run for the Stanley Cup, Scott Hunter has had a lot to celebrate, "but there was always something missing," Hunter reflects, "I was scared and lonely for most of my career, I'm not anymore."
Join us as #ScottHunter continues to inspire through his journey of self-discovery and love, showing us that there are things in life that outweigh fear.
@andrew.mcclean
1. 
2. 
3. 
happy birthday, brother @luke15gillis
@shanehollander✪ @andrew.mcclean I'm gonna need you to send me every picture you have of baby Luke stat.
@andrew.mcclean on it🫡@luke15gillis✪ love you, brother.
@outmagazine ✪
1. 
2. 
Out's July/August cover star Scott Hunter is entering a new era, one not defined by fear but, rather, by love.
In his cover story, he reflects on the difficulty of hiding parts of yourself to seem more palatable, on the importance of friendships, and on finally believing in love, telling us that, "I've been extremely fortunate. I have a lot and I'm grateful. But I was always missing something very important in my life. And this year, I found it." Hunter emphasizes the importance of asking for help and seeking out people who will love you as you are, citing his friendships with teammates Eric Bennett, Shane Hollander, Greg Huff, Carter Vaughan, and Cale Wagner as examples of people he was able to turn to at every step along this journey. "Shane and Carter," he singled out, "have gone above and beyond in their support. Shane was the first person I told about Kip, he knew before coming to New York and he never once made me feel like I was something other, like I was somehow out of place. Carter, I think, guessed from some of the things he overheard Shane and I talking about, but he never pried, he never made me feel like I owed it to him to share my secret, he just stayed by my side like he always had and when I finally felt brave enough to introduce him to Kip, his only reaction was to wax poetic about how cute a name 'Kip' is. Those two have been my rocks, they've done everything possible to make sure I feel their support and I am so lucky to be able to call them family."
Hunter's journey highlights the need for advocacy, visibility, and representation in spaces that are historically unwelcoming, "not everyone is as open as this team," Hunter tells us, "there are locker rooms out there where I wouldn't have felt safe and my heart goes out to anyone stuck in a culture like that, whether in the NHL, in a different professional sport, in their family home, or even under their country's government, I wish I could snap my fingers and make it safe for everyone but that's not the way the world works. It's disheartening and it makes me appreciate the community I have even more." Hunter knows that the example he's set isn't a fix-all, that this won't make the world a magically welcoming place, but he hopes that his journey can be a symbol of hope, at least in some manner, he hopes that people will follow the example of Bennett, Hollander, Huff, Vaughan, Wagner, and the rest of the @nyadmirals in welcoming LGBTQ+ voices and identities with open arms and open minds.
@scotthunter ✪
@outmagazine thank you so much for the opportunity to talk about my journey. If there isn't enough of me waxing poetic about @kipgrady (or Hollzy, Vaughny, Benny, Huff, and Wagner) in this article for you, reach out because I've always got more to say about my favorite people.
@shanehollander✪ so proud of you, Scotty❤️
@vaughanofficial✪ Kip is a really cute name and I stand by that.
@kipgrady @vaughanofficial I appreciate it, Carter.@calewagner51✪ I, personally, would LOVE to hear you talk more about your amazing, beautiful teammates. I'm sure they're great guys who are very humble and not at all digging for compliments.
@shanehollander✪ @calewagner51 this was really well said, Cale, I simply must agree with you.
@bennettofficial✪ @shanehollander @calewagner51 I second Hollzy's statement. @scotthunter we want to hear more about your teammates.
@scotthunter✪ You're all annoying and I love you anyway.
@kipgrady ...I'd also love to hear more about your favorite people.
@scotthunter✪ @kipgrady you, I'll talk about all day. The rest of them can fend for themselves.
@kipgrady @scotthunter 😘
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
couldn't be prouder of our Captain❤️
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you @drewmcclean. Happy birthday @luke15gillis.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
why would you do this to me.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis is this one better?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander ...bruh
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Awwww! Baby @luke15gillis!! Happy birthday, kiddo.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@scotthunter thanks dad :)
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Everyone go read @scotthunter's article in Out Magazine! I am so proud of you, Scotty.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
really rude of you to have taken this picture and never sent it to me honestly
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@kipgrady, apologies. Here's another.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@shanehollander you're forgiven.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
happy birthday, Kid @luke15gillis
kara @hunter21
i think the admirals are getting hotter by the day.
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hunter21 you're not wrong.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
he's finally not a teenager!!! yay @luke15gillis!! happy birthday :)
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
happy birthday @luke15gillis
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
happy birthday, gilly @luke15gillis
ruby @hollanderNYC
genuinely starting to wonder if the admirals consider attractiveness as a factor during the draft.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
at one point in his life, @luke15gillis had taste. both in cities and in jersey numbers.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
you didn't even say "happy birthday," rozy.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@luke15gillis this isn't a birthday post, it's a public service announcement.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@ilyarozanov ...right.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
it's the kid's birthday :) @luke15gillis
SATURDAY
Colin @colinmoore
So glad this parade happened on a Saturday. I mean, I would've skipped class to go anyways, but this way I can continue to be an academic weapon.
mac @hockeyfan1992
I am literally your TA. Don't post about skipping class.
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 I never said I'd skip your class.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
they're doing shots and we haven't even gotten on the busses yet. this is gonna be a long day.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
oh!! good!! cam and nick decided it'd be fun to teach shane how to shotgun.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@amanda.mccall that man is 26 years old. How did he not already know how to shotgun?
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 he never went to college.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
📍Canyon of Heroes, NYC
kara @hunter21
it looks like the pride parade is happening a week early with everyone out here celebrating @scotthunter
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
i was just reminded that we are supposed to give speeches. everyone fasten your seatbelts, this is gonna be a bumpy ride.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
I was under the impression that Hollzy and Scotty were going to give speeches so the rest of us wouldn't have to. I am starting to wonder if that impression was wrong.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Scott just threatened to sing. Do NOT give him access to a microphone. Please.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
I believe in Hollzy's ability to pull it together, though.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@shanehollander and i have been nominated to give speeches. i wish both us and all of you the best of luck.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we love you, @vaughan19
*video of Carter's half-coherent speech. He has his arm around Shane the whole time and it's really not clear which of them is holding up the other. "This season felt different from any other. We had some highs and lows but we found our groove and we got it done! I feel so lucky to be apart of this team and to live in this city. I grew up in North Dakota and never even imagined having the chance to call New York City home so every moment of this journey is new and crazy and absolutely wonderful. We, uh, we gotta thank our coaches and all the staff, we couldn't do it without y'all. And I gotta thank Scotty, our Captain, he's a great leader, takes care of all the hard stuff so Shane and I can screw around. Kidding, kidding, we share the burden which I think is part of why we work so well. I couldn't do this without Scott and we couldn't do it without Shane so thank you both. And thank you to the rest of you guys," he pauses, gesturing wildly at the team gathered on stage, causing him and Shane to stumble slightly before righting themselves, "you're all incredible and I love you lots."*
gen @genevieve1998
that went far better than i ever could've imagined.
ruby @hollanderNYC
i don't know how any of them are still standing.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander loves NYC, NYC loves Shane Hollander❤️
*video of Shane's drunken, yet somehow mostly coherent, speech. Please note that Carter Vaughan is attached to Shane like a barnacle the entire time. "I haven't lived here long, but this place already feels like home and I am so grateful to have had the opportunity to bring this Cup home to all of you. This is the most fun I've had playing hockey in a long, long time and part of that is because of this city and the other part of that is because of this team. All of these guys welcomed me with open arms, they reminded me of all the reasons I love this sport, and they've helped make me into a better player and a better version of me so thank you New York, thank you to my team, and thank you, especially, to Scott for cornering me at All Star Weekend and not at all subtly hinting that I should become an Admiral, I'm better for it and I'm better for having you as a friend, Scotty," Shane pauses for a second, a look on his face like he's trying to remember something before he breaks out into a grin, "just realized I don't have to translate that into French anymore, thank God." Scott pulls himself away from where Eric Bennett has clearly been keeping him from accessing a microphone to perform the previously threatened song and stumbles forward to join a group hug with Carter and Shane while the rest of the team cheers. Eric looks distinctly nervous about Scott's proximity to the microphone.*
brett @brettnash
screw his hockey skills, being this coherent while drunk out of his mind should get him into the hall of fame.
Ryan @admirals1987
Is there a record for most grammatically correct drunk rally speech? Because I think Hollander might've broken it.
Zach @zachariah.zach
Anyone else kind of want to see him drunkenly attempt to translate that to French??
Ryan @admirals1987
@zachariah.zach 🙋♂️🙋♂️
Colin @colinmoore
The Admirals have done a lot of impressive things this year but Vaughan and Hollander somehow powering through speeches while looking like the Leaning Tower of Pisa might just be the most impressive.
Colin @colinmoore
They even kept the speeches safe for public broadcast. I don't know how they locked in hard enough to pull that off, but I am deeply impressed.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
i owe shane money now.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@amanda.mccall what did you bet?
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 i did not believe in his ability to get through that speech without swearing.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@amanda.mccall bet him double or nothing on if he can remember what he said AND translate to French.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 i love the way your mind works.
alice @hollanov
eric bennett looks genuinely terrified of scott being given access to a microphone 😂
alice @hollanov
also the way he tweeted earlier that scott had "threatened" to sing is hilarious.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
come on shane. all you have to do is get scott off the stage without letting him sing. you can do it.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
i love you, shane hollander.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@amanda.mccall i also love shane hollander. i have never seen scott this drunk. nothing good would've come out of giving him the mic😂
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@amanda.mccall @kipgrady happy to be of service.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
thank you, NYC #Admirals🗽
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
posting pictures to ignore the insanity happening around me. who gave these guys access to alcohol?? #Admirals🗽
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Says the person with a purse full of shooters.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@shanehollander no need to expose me like that.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
we made it off stage. everyone cheer for me and @shanehollander please and thanks.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 you are so right. We deserve more applause.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
@vaughan19 @shanehollander I'm buying you both drinks.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@vaugahn19 @shanehollander @bennettofficial me too. You guys deserve a reward.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
For the people asking for @shanehollander to translate:
*video taken in some bar, it's very loud. Shane is smashed in between Carter and Luke in a booth, "alright, alright," Shane says, "I can try to translate but there are no promises that this goes well."
They all laugh, "oh, I'm hoping it goes really fucking poorly," Carter says, knocking his shoulder against Shane's.
"Okay," Shane starts, looking down at his phone.
"No, no, no," a female voice cuts in, the camera pans to Amanda reaching across and grabbing Shane's phone, "the bet was that you translate and remember it all."
Shane glares at her but doesn't fight for his phone back, "fine, okay, uhhh, French, do I remember French? Probably, fine. Okay. Je ne vis pas ici depuis longtemps, mais je me sens déjà comme chez moi et jje suis tellement reconnaissant d'avoir eu l'opportunité de ramener cette coupe ici, pour vous tous. Then something about having fun playing hockey, right? Like, ah, je n'ai pas pris autant de plaisir à jouer au hockey depuis très longtemps, dude I don't remember. Then something about loving New York and loving Scott, fine, Amanda, take your money there's no shot I remember the rest," Shane pulls out his wallet and tosses her a $50, laughing as he does it.
"Now do it in Russian," Wagner yells, the camera pans again to show several people, teammates and partners, cheering.
"I don't know enough Russian for that," Shane laughs. "French is all you're getting." Everyone boos and then the video cuts off.*
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
someone make him try it in russian!!
☘️☘️ @princessshane
just when you think shane can't get any hotter, he starts speaking french.
Ryan @admirals1987
Okay this is incredibly impressive.
Zach @zachariah.zach
Why does Hollander know *any* Russian??
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@zachariah.zach i could tell you why but you'd never believe me.
ava @hollander35
between the smile on his face when he realized he didn't have to translate to french and the way he said he was finally having fun playing hockey again, i'm getting some bad feelings about montreal.
shayden @haydenhollander
@hollander35 add in the fact that scott specifically mentioned that he knew there were locker rooms out there where he wouldn't be safe??? not a good picture.
alice @hollanov
i feel like we've known the whole time that something was off in montreal.
shayden @haydenhollander
@hollanov fair, but like, it kinda seems like shane came out and montreal kicked him out.
alice @hollanov
how fun would it be if we could talk about culture without speculating on people's sexualities.
alice @hollanov
maybe he's gay. maybe he just got sick of playing with bigots. maybe he wants to quit hockey and start up a career playing the violin. who the fuck knows, who the fuck cares.
alice @hollanov
what we should be focusing on is creating welcoming spaces and advocating for people who can't advocate for themselves.
alice @hollanov
okay. rant over. now i just really want to hear shane hollander drunkenly translating parts of his speech into as many languages as possible.
kara @hunter21
many things have happened today, but i don't think we've given enough attention to the fact that carter vaughan is from north dakota.
Ryan @admirals1987
Every time that's mentioned, it feels like the first time I'm learning it.
kara @hunter21
@admirals1987 right? i swear i've heard that before yet i was still shocked.
Ryan @admirals1987
@hunter21 I think I just forget that people actually live there 😂
Chapter 38: starman and starboy
Notes:
i meant to post this friday night but then i got distracted watching the herd of buffalo by my parents' house and then yesterday my brain told me i needed to wash every article of clothing i own ... so, sorry for the delay??
just like how we pretended francois' hair was the same length throughout the last chapter, we're gonna pretend he's not wearing three different outfits here. we're also gonna pretend that sophie's hair isn't two different colors. thank you.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@roselandry :)
📍 Las Vegas, Nevada
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@shanehollander 🖕
max @holla.nov2481
...are they back together??
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
if they are i will cry. and not in a good way.
svetlana @svetrova
NHL Awards♥︎
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
моя прекрасная спутница.
svetlana @svetrova
@ilyarozanov повезло тебе
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
📍 Las Vegas, Nevada
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
the kid looking way too cool to be seen with any of us
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
why did you put this in black and white?
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@luke15gillis aura.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@vaughan19 i need to stop teaching you new words.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
She escaped the carpet to find snacks and refuses to share.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
and i looked good doing it.
alice @hollanov
...wtf is happening rn.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
our Calder winner #Admirals🗽
vivian @vivpeterson06
i think getting hugged by someone like luke just hugged shane would fix everything wrong with me.
alice @hollanov
luke gillis, i would give my life for you.
alice @hollanov
"thank you for being my brother" why don't you just stab me? it'd hurt less.
Drew @drewmcclean
proud of you @luke15gillis
☘️☘️ @princessshane
did the camera seriously just cut to yuna hollander taking pictures of luke winning his award😭😭
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
our Ted Lindsay winner #Admirals🗽
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Why does @luke15gillis get a cute picture and I get this??
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander because this one's fun and flirty??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@NYAdmirals right, should've guessed.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@amanda.mccall you're welcome for sending this to you.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@roselandry thank you, queen.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
like 2 months ago i volunteered to watch shane's dog while he got back on the ice with the trainers and now i have rose landry's number in my phone.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
what the fuck even is my life anymore??
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@shanehollander you just won an award. you could try to look more excited.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
First of all, this photo was taken before we even got to the arena. Secondly, this option was right there. Why'd you have to post the one where look like I hate everything??
svetlana @svetrova
i like this one because it makes @ilyarozanov look short.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
you're all wrong. this is the best one.
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
ARE THEY HOLDING HANDS?
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
you're all wrong. this is the best one.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
pretty boy just won another trophy.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Why does he always insist on picking up my dog??
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@greghuffhockey because he's a kind, loving, beautiful person?
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@scotthunter Vaughny's trying to steal your man.
kara @hunter21
did vaughan seriously just call hollander 'pretty boy' on main?
kara @hunter21
the way they're both at the awards with movie star dates yet every time the camera cuts to their table, they're talking to each other instead.
alice @hollanov
kara @hunter21
@hollanov exactly😂
alice @hollanov
oh how far we've come.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
chill, roz, he's not going anywhere.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
you're all wrong. this is the best one.
lily @lilyhollander1221
he just has to make sure. would be very embarrassing to lose hollander after finally catching him.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@lilyhollander1221 fair😂
mac @hockeyfan1992
I am no longer simply on the Hollanov train, I am the conductor.
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 we should consider finding more hobbies.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
our Hart winner ❤️ #Admirals🗽
we love you, Cap @scotthunter
kara @hunter21 🔁 vivian @vivpeterson06
am i to understand that this was them leaving together so scott could come out to shane??
vivian @vivpeterson06
i'm staying at the same hotel as the NHL All Stars rn & someone tell me why i just watched shane hollander and scott hunter leave the bar together
kara @hunter21
the way this was like the beginning of the shott rumor and we could not have been more wrong about what was happening😂😂
shayden @haydenhollander
"he made a space for me to exist with the man i love without judgment" shane hollander the man that you are😭
shayden @haydenhollander
it's just so wonderful to hear that scott had friends he could turn to that made everything a little less terrifying
shayden @haydenhollander
i can't even imagine how much courage all of this must've taken.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@shanehollander sorry again about knocking you out...
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial you did your penance.
ava @hollander35 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
choosing to believe his penance was decking comeau.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial you did your penance.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
proud of you, scotty ❤️❤️ @scotthunter
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
MVP MVP MVP (love you, Scotty)
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander stop posting awful pictures of me on the internet.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter I think this is a wonderful picture of you.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
after party <3
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@kipgrady I have the hottest date.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter that's what happens when your date is Very Hot Man.
kara @hunter21 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
oh fuck.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter that's what happens when your date is Very Hot Man.
kara @hunter21
does this mean they know!??
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hunter21 i'm afraid.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
two award winners and the best player in the league.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@ilyarozanov why'd you mention Shane twice??
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@scotthunter oh, grandpa has jokes now?
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
two MVPs and some random guy??
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
all three of you are really bad at dissuading rumors.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@amanda.mccall i like how you think they're trying to stop the rumors. they thrive on the attention.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@kipgrady you're so right, Very Hot Man.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
📍 Las Vegas, Nevada
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
You left me alone to socialize. Stop hiding.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@shanehollander you'll be fine.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@roselandry you have too much faith in me.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@shanehollander 😘💋
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
SCOTT HUNTER NIGHT. BE THERE.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 this is really effective advertising.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
i'd like it on record that i love gay hockey players.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Rose 😂
J.J. ✪ @jeanjboiziau
when i made friends with shane seven years ago, never did i imagine it'd land me in a vegas gay club yet here i am.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@jeanjboiziau what??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35 we're at Scott Hunter Night along with like half the League.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@jeanjboiziau @shanehollander so happy for both of you, really glad you're having fun, now can one of you come back to Montreal? I need to have a conversation with an adult or I'm gonna lose it.
Jackie @jackiepike
@haydpike35 I'm right here??
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@jackiepike oh don't start, you're about to lose it too.
Jackie @jackiepike
@haydpike35 ... you might be right. @jeanjboiziau @shanehollander one of you come home. please.
Notes:
as an explanation for why no one commented on ilya acting posessive w shane, they were in a dark corner of room and scott could really only see them because he was a level above them plus everyone was already half drunk from the official after party and really wasn't paying attention to their surroundings at the club.
Chapter 39: anya
Chapter Text
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
he found this dog and refuses to put it down.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
isn't he supposed to be doing a photoshoot right now?
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@roselandry yes.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
creative director just explained the concept ... currently very thankful a certain someone didn't join us this morning.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
idk man. when i decided to major in sport management and minor in comms this really wasn't how i thought i'd be spending my time.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
why didn't they just use cling film as transfer paper😂😂
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@roselandry i asked. they said it'd look more authentic this way.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
i'm gonna hide a certain someone's phone until you can go into witness protection.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@luke15gillis tell a certain someone this is cosmo's fault.
mac @hockeyfan1992
i think there are a number of people who would pay good money to be in your position.
NHL Trade News ✪ @TradeNewsNHL
Our analysts are predicting a lot of movement over the next two weeks, no moves will be publicly confirmed until after free agency begins July 1st.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Ready for summer.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
they just left and i miss her already :(
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
You miss Sunny but not Shane?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@greghuffhockey okay fine i miss holly too.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@luke15gillis awww what a cute picture of hollzy❤️
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
hey @scotthunter hollander took me on a dog adopting adventure too.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Wow that makes me feel so much less special.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@scotthunter good.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
everyone meet Anya Rozanova :)
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
OH MY GOD
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
I love her.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
...did hollanov just adopt a dog together??
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
hey @scotthunter hollander took me on a dog adopting adventure too.
alice @hollanov
nothing they do shocks me anymore.
Chapter 40: living love in slow motion
Notes:
note: all the vegas players were announced during the nhl awards/expansion draft.
Chapter Text
Monday
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
☀️☀️☀️
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
i'm gonna cry i love her so much.
Tuesday
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
:)
📍 Long Beach, NY
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Tell @drewmcclean I say hi :)
NHL Follow Tracker ✪ @NHLFollowTrack
👉 ilyarozanov (Ilya Rozanov) followed 4, unfollowed 0:
✅ wagnerkara (Kara Wagner)
🔗 instagram.com/wagnerkara
✅ martinemarie (Martine Brisebois)
🔗 instagram.com/martinemarie
NHL Follow Tracker ✪ @NHLFollowTrack
✅ maryanne_huff (Mary Huff)
🔗 instagram.com/maryanne_huff
✅ holly.bennett (Holly Bennett)
🔗 instagram.com/holly.bennett
kara @hunter21
why the hell is ilya rozanov following a bunch of the nya wags??
boston wags :)
Jackie Pike
Jane, any update on if we can add another number to this chat?
Shane
She hasn't responded to my texts in 36 hours I'm getting suspicious.
Jackie Pike
Don't you have her location?
Camille St-Simon
who are we talking about??
Shane
Top secret.
Kidding, you remember who was flirting with Cliff in Vegas??
Camille St-Simon
ohhhhh
yeah, you need to get us an update.
Grace Carmichael
you're our inside source.
Shane
Also. Yes, Jack, I have her location and it's telling me nothing.
Claire Feller
What is going on right now.
Jackie Pike
I'm calling you now, babe, you better pick up.
Shane
Yes, ma'am.
Claire Feller
Jackie why are you calling Rozanov's girlfriend babe?
Shane
That's what she's always called me.
Claire Feller
I feel like I'm missing something.
Shane
You're not, really, we're just being nosy.
Though if we're right about what's happening (which I hope we are) you're all going to get to meet one of my favorite people so, fingers crossed.
Claire Feller
You all like this girl?
Grace Carmichael
I've met her one single time and I think I'd give her one of my kidneys if she asked nicely enough.
Claire Feller
Sounds like Cliff doesn't deserve her😂😂
Camille St-Simon
ahh, Cliff's a big ol softie
Claire Feller
Fair.
Well, then, I wish you all the best of luck in your nosy endeavors.
Shane
🫡
Jackie Pike, Camille St-Simon, Grace Carmichael
Jackie Pike
has she answered yet??
Shane
No, but her calendar says she's shooting so she's probably been exhausted.
I'll let you know
Camille St-Simon
you have access to her calendar?
Shane
Yes
Camille St-Simon
that feels like the sort of access you revoke after breaking up with someone😂
Shane
To be entirely honest, she didn't even give me access until *after* we broke up.
Grace Carmichael
shane. i want to be you.
Jackie Pike
Being Shane would be fun for awhile but then you remember that it also involves a bird food diet, putting up with Ilya Rozanov, and being soul-tied to Hayden Pike.
Shane
You are quite literally married to Hayden Pike.
Jackie Pike
And somehow I have a less co-dependent relationship with him than you do.
Really makes you think.
Shane
Go say that on Twitter. You'll make some great friends.
Thursday
NHL Follow Tracker ✪ @NHLFollowTrack
👉 shanehollander (Shane Hollander) followed 2, unfollowed 0:
✅ g.carmichael (Grace Carmichael)
🔗 instagram.com/g.carmichael
✅ cami_st.simon (Camille St-Simon)
🔗 instagram.com/cami_st.simon
kara @hunter21
oh and now shane is following boston wags... what?????
mac @hockeyfan1992
I think you need about six more question marks.
Friday
@shanehollander ✪
📍Canada
@haydpike35 well this explains why you haven't been answering your phone.
@jackiepike @haydpike35 he talked to me for an hour literally yesterday?? i think maybe he just doesn't like you.
@shanehollander @jackiepike right as always.
@haydpike35 @jackiepike @shanehollander you two suck.@jeanjboiziau odds you leave your fortress of solitude to come visit your favorite french canadian??
@shanehollander @jeanjboiziau low.
@jeanjboiziau @shanehollander ...thought so
@ilyarozanov✪
☀️🌲🐶
@marlowofficial I need 18 more pictures of that dog. Stat.
@ilyarozanov @marlowofficial 🫡
max @holla.nov2481
it's entirely possible that i've lost it and these are two totally different forests but ... are they together??
mac @hockeyfan1992
@holla.nov2481 I see your insanity and raise you: Roz took this picture.
max @holla.nov2481
@hockeyfan1992 i like the way u think.
boston wags :)
Anna Varkov
...is Rozanov in Canada with Shane Hollander right now?
Grace Carmichael
huh ... it would appear so
Shane
You think you're so funny, Grace.
Grace Carmichael
i am funny.
you just don't appreciate my humor.
Shane
Yes, Anna, we're in Canada for the summer.
Anna Varkov
You and Ilya are spending your summer with Hollander?
Shane
Yeah, they're planning to do preseason training together. I think Cliff is considering coming up, too, and maybe J.J. Boiziau.
Jackie Pike
Are the Pikes allowed?
Shane
Stop asking dumb questions, Jackie.
Jackie Pike, Camille St-Simon, Grace Carmichael
Shane
Talking about myself in the third person is quickly becoming exhausting.
Camille St-Simon
are you guys planning to tell the team??
you told new york, right? and it went well?
Shane
Yeah, it went great, honestly. The rookies LOVE Ilya so they broke the ice pretty quickly.
I think we'll tell Boston, too, it's just a little easier in person, you know? Easier to gauge the reaction.
Jackie Pike
I think having Hayden there will make it easier, too.
Someone on the team who knows you and who knows you and Ilya.
Shane, Mila Miitka just texted me??? Asked if I knew if you'd spoken to Mitty?
Shane
No?
Jackie Pike
...okay
Well, that's odd.
Shane
I got a text from Tanner Dillon this morning telling me that he'd been pulling for New York but ended up in Ottawa but I haven't heard from anyone else.
Jackie Pike
You're gonna invite that kid to train with you guys, right?
He idolizes you, Shane.
He also watched the kids SEVERAL times while we were meeting with Hayden's agent.
Shane
I already invited him, Jack.
Grace Carmichael
Shane, what do you know about Wyatt Hayes?
We added his wife to the chat but haven't really heard from her and I want her to feel welcome
Shane
Not much, I only just met him for real at the NHL Awards.
Ilya says he likes comic books and that his wife is a doctor, I have no clue when he learned that seeing as I was standing there the whole time but I'm not gonna question it.
He thinks maybe Lisa is busy dealing with hospital stuff.
Okay, from what it sounds like, she's finishing up her last year of residency so I'd bet she's not moving to Boston quite yet.
Maybe invite her to get dinner or something when Boston plays in Toronto??
Camille St-Simon
i vote more hockey players start dating each other.
everything captains (and alt captains, i guess. even though i still think you should rip the C right off hunter's jersey and take it for yourself) know plus everything wags know?? it's like we've created our own intelligence network.
Jackie Pike
I second the ripping of the C and stealing it for yourself.
Shane
I'm not gunning for Scott's C. It's far more peaceful being an Alt.
Grace Carmichael
i also vote more hockey players start dating each other.
less because i care about the intel and more because i think it's hot.
Shane
Grace😂
Saturday July 1, 2017:
nyc wags & habs
Kara Wagner
Trades dropping today.
Who's ready for chaos??
Martine Brisebois
Louis said Shane and Scott were talking about Montreal "assembling the asshole avengers" anyone know what that means?
Ilya
i've literally never heard someone call Breezy by his first name.
i think i had actually forgotten Breezy had a first name.
Kip Grady
scott says the "asshole avengers" are comeau, drapeau, and kent.
as opposed to the good avengers, i.e., him, shane, carter, eric, greg, and cale
oh he's still talking
anyone shocked to learn that he's assigned them all characters? i'm not.
moral of the story: dallas kent's going to montreal so they can hold the annual convention of homophobes and idiots.
Mary Huff
Ignoring the asshole convention for a moment: what are their characters?
Kip Grady
"I'm clearly Captain America."
right, of course, scott.
he apparently spent quite a bit of time trying to decide if carter or shane was spiderman and then decided that he was wrong and it's actually luke gillis.
i don't think he has any real concept of which ones are actually the avengers. he's just naming random characters at this point.
he is now adamant that shane is bucky barnes. i really don't know what to do with that.
Mary Huff
Kip Grady
Ilya
which character gets to kill captain america.
i'm that character.
Holly Bennett
Are you telling me that Scott watched Captain America: Civil War, saw Steve and Bucky, and went "oh, that's clearly me and Shane?"
Kip Grady
yes.
Holly Bennett
I'm with Roz, what character gets to kill Captain America 😂
Kip Grady
ilya, tell them what marlow asked on shane's first day in new york.
Ilya
oh my god.
he saw that clip of hunter, vaughan, and shane in the hall laughing and then the picture of hunter and shane adopting sunny and asked if that was why shane moved to new york.
and then hunter facetimed me and it took five minutes and me saying that i knew shane wasn't fucking hunter because he was fucking ME for marlow to finally believe me when i said shane and hunter weren't together.
then he told hunter that he needed to stop looking at shane like he wanted to bend him over.
Kip Grady
see what we deal with?
Mary Huff
You two are God's strongest soldiers.
Side note: should we call you Lily if/when we add new people in?
Ilya
maybe just until you guys get an idea of if they'd be accepting??
like if they're being weird about kip and scott, they're almost guaranteed to be weirder about me and shane
Kip Grady
i'm happy to be your test dummy.
Kara Wagner
I love you and Shane. It's so fun watching Shane Hollander with a personality.
Kip Grady
i think scott is still talking about marvel characters... are any of your husbands/boyfriends free?
Mary Huff
Are you trying to set up a play date for your boyfriend right now?
Kip Grady
yes.
Mary Huff
I'll tell Greg to invite him out for drinks😂
Kip Grady
thank you. you are a queen amongst mortals.
NHL Trade News ✪ @TradeNewsNHL
shayden @haydenhollander
hayden pike to BOSTON??
Levi @levicarlson25
A new goalie in Boston. I can finally sleep peacefully.
ava @hollander35
really wanted hayden back with shane and this is actually the worst possible option.
ava @hollander35
now he's going to be forced to play with that asshole rozanov. ugh, poor hayden. i hope he's okay.
boston wags :)
Grace Carmichael
everyone's freaking out. little do they know that this is the less insane of the two bombshells.
Jackie Pike
Most of the people freaking out are teenage girls who want my husband back with his boyfriend.
I also want my husband back with his boyfriend, mostly because Arthur likes Shane better than either of us, but such is life.
Anna Varkov
i just saw one of them shedding tears over hayden having to suffer through playing with rozanov
meanwhile they're both friends with hollander and would probably be forced to talk either way
Jackie Pike
They are absolutely forced to interact but it's about 20% talking, 80% pissing contest.
I love Ilya, though, so Hayden can suck it up.
NHL Trade News ✪ @TradeNewsNHL
Luke @lucaskent
Okay, wait, this is awesome. A center who spent both years of his ELC under Shane Hollander with a Cup already under his belt? We'll take him, please and thank you.
Blake @blake98myers
Finally!!! A competent center!!! My prayers have been answered.
tanner ✪ @tanner06dillon
Looking forward to playing with the @Centaurs organization!! I am so grateful for this opportunity. See you soon, Ottawa.
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
Welcome home, man! We're excited to have you.
Ottawa Centaurs ✪ @Centaurs
welcome to Ottawa, @tanner06dillon!!
nyc wags & habs
Mary Huff
The calm before the storm.
Who's ready for the fallout? I'm getting popcorn.
Holly Bennett
I think Eric is considering taking out a hit on Dallas Kent.
He's watching ESPN right now with this exact expression on his face:
Ilya
he is twinning with shane, then.
just a couple of angry kittens.
Holly Bennett
Maybe we should get bail money ready, Roz.
If those two team up it's over.
Ilya
what makes you think i won't be helping??
NHL Trade News ✪ @TradeNewsNHL
Colin @colinmoore
...huh?
Levi @levicarlson25
Didn't even realize this was a possibility.
ELI @elliot1999
Who is making these decisions? How are they making these decisions? Because right now I'm imaging tarot cards and a dart board.
Levi @levicarlson25
@elliot1999 I think there might be witchcraft involved.
Colin @colinmoore
HUH?
Colin @colinmoore
I'm actually revoking my Canadian citizenship.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Everyone hold on one goddamn minute.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Pike to Boston, Boiziau to Toronto, Dillon to Ottawa, Laine and Miitka to Vegas.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Five players with strong records, five players who either had time left on their contracts or who were CLEARLY in extension talks. Five players with a tie to Hollander.
mac @hockeyfan1992
All of them gone *months* after Hollander unceremoniously leaves??
mac @hockeyfan1992
Montreal I am on to you. I don't know what you did but my spidey senses are tingling.
Colin @colinmoore
My spidey senses are also tingling.
alice @hollanov
sometimes i watch things happen and wonder if mtl's management WANTS a lawsuit.
alice @hollanov
like are they just that bored?? do they yearn for hours at a conference table with expensive lawyers? is that their idea of fun??
alice @hollanov
it's like the opposite of a competency kink.
alice @hollanov
they have a kink for assholes who suck at their jobs. dear lord.
@cosmopolitan✪
New York's @shanehollander just won his third consecutive Stanley Cup and, more importantly (to us, anyways), was named the NHL's Hottest Player for the 5th year in a row. The 26-year-old All Star has spent his career being known as Canada's Golden Boy, often seen as a "hockey robot" (his words, not ours) with no real personality. But during his recent move to New York, he decided, "I'm done making myself smaller to make people more comfortable. I've spent my life trying to be one thing, so much so that I think I forgot what pieces were a role I was playing and which pieces were really me. I don't want to do that anymore, I want to be myself, I want to show people the truth. I want to show everyone how hard I work to succeed and I want to show everyone that, on the rare occasion, I can actually be fun."
Shane has spent years doing shoots and commercials, something he got into in high school to help fund his early hockey career, but admitted that he wasn't always comfortable in front of the camera; "I felt weird, honestly, like I was putting on some sort of show. Recently, though, I've been having more fun with it. I've been letting myself have fun. I feel good about myself, good about where I'm at in my career and in life, and I think that makes it easier to let people see me as I am."
@haydpike35✪ SHANE HOLLANDER🔥
@haydpike35✪ what are they putting in that ginger ale??🤨🤨@vaughanofficial✪ HOLLZY, BABY, OH MY GOD 🔥🔥
@scotthunter✪ I really don't understand how easily you balance being adorable and so sexy it makes me feel a little stupid.
@vaughanofficial✪ keep it in your pants, hunter. you've already got a man, hollzy's mine.
@gloriagrey✪ @vaughanofficial ???
@vaughanofficial✪ @gloriagrey i'm jokingggg
@vaughanofficial✪ (@shanehollander no i'm not. call me.)@roselandry✪ look at that smileeee🥹🥹 aww @shanehollander i love you so bad
@cami_st.simon i'm filing for divorce. @shanehollander hit me up.
@st.simonofficial✪ @cami_st.simon ...I get it.
@cosmopolitan✪
Canada's Golden Boy? We think it's a little more Hockey's It Boy.
@g.carmichael oh my god @shanehollander you can't be this pretty and that good at hockey. pick one, please.
@haydpike35✪ The pants could go lower.
@vaughanofficial✪ @haydpike35 agreed.
Jackie Pike, Camille St-Simon, Grace Carmichael
Camille St-Simon
SHANE
HOLY FUCK
it's honestly rude of you to be gay. what did men do to deserve all that??
Grace Carmichael
i've genuinely never hated ilya rozanov more.
Boston Bears💪
marly added pike to the conversation
st-simon
How do we get our girls to stop openly thirsting over Shane Hollander??
marly
At least yours hasn't slept with him.
st-simon
What the actual fuck is that supposed to mean?
Cliff
Marlow
Cliff Marlow get back here and explain yourself.
marly
No.
pike
My wife just encouraged me to openly thirst over Shane Hollander more so I really don't have advice for you.
carmichael
@ Vic & Pike I think my wife is in a group chat with your wives and Hollander for some unknown reason
Also, Pike, welcome to Boston, man.
pike
Yeah, there's definitely a group chat. And thanks, happy to be here!
alice @hollanov
save us shirtless shane hollander 🙏🙏
@shanehollander✪
Thank you @cosmopolitian :)
@haydpike35✪ I wasn't aware the pictures could get hotter. I am no longer only requesting that you do media shirtless. I am now requesting that you also do it pants-less.
@vaugahnofficial✪ @haydpike35 i think we need to duel for shane's hand. we can't both be in his comments like this.
@luke15gillis✪ @haydpike35 you're married. @vaughanofficial you have a girlfriend. both of you leave holly alone.@roselandry✪ you're so hot you've actually blinded me. i can't see anything other than the freckles on your chest. this is seriously going to impact my life.
@jackiepike Why didn't you get earrings sooner? Specifically about 8 years ago before you walked into that bar in Montreal.
@haydpike35✪ @jackiepike ...are you saying that Shane with an earring would've caused you to pick him over me? Your husband and the father of your four beautiful children?
@jackiepike @haydpike35 pot, kettle.
Colin @colinmoore
i think i've died and gone to heaven.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
thanks @Cosmopolitian :)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
these pictures might be even more life changing than the GQ ones
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
@NYAdmirals agreed.
Brooklyn Scouts ✪ @NYScouts
@NYAdmirals agreed.
Ottawa Centaurs ✪ @Centaurs
@NYAdmirals you know what? yeah. agreed.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
oh fuck. wrong account. sorry christina🫣
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
right, well, apparently boston's in it with me.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
oh. and brooklyn. okay.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
shane hollander you have destroyed the lives of nhl twitter admins across the eastern seaboard. how do you feel about that?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@amanda.mccall unapologetic.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
you got ottawa too.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
the best part of being named @Cosmopolitan's hottest hockey player five years running is holding it over @ilyarozanov's head🤍
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
i was still first overall draft pick, hollander.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov which one of us has three Cups again??
Ottawa Centaurs ✪ @Centaurs
now feels like as good a time as any to remind everyone that @shanehollander is from Ottawa.
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
@shanehollander we still love you even though you play for NY.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@zaneboodramofficial love you too, Bood.
Colin @colinmoore
I got so distracted by Shane Hollander's abs covered in lipstick that I almost forgot to be mad about that MTL trade.
Colin @colinmoore
What do you MEAN you got rid of J.J. BOIZIAU for DALLAS FUCKING KENT.
Colin @colinmoore
There's stupid and then there's Montreal Voyageurs management.
Colin @colinmoore
Just burn it all down and try again, honestly.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i don't even know where to begin.
lily @lilyhollander1221
first off, someone should just lock all the remaining voyageurs inside the bell center and let them duke it out hunger games style. save the rest of us from having to deal with them.
alice @hollanov
incredible idea. seconded.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
no notes. i hope wilson wins, he seems like the least evil option.
lily @lilyhollander1221
now, onto more important things.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@shanehollander call me. i'm not kidding. i will make you very happy, i promise.
lily @lilyhollander1221
you are so pretty it's not fair
lily @lilyhollander1221
i need the uncropped version of this picture for personal use.
nyc wags & habs
Kara Wagner
...question
Ilya: do you happen to have a second twitter account?
Ilya
no comment
Mary Huff
YOU'RE JOKING
lily @lilyhollander1221
really wish i'd been there for this shoot. those kisses would've gotten indecent.
lily @lilyhollander1221
his pants are covering up far too much for my taste.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i also need the names and addresses of every person touching him in this picture. for no specific reason.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@amanda.mccall you are so lucky i like you.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@lilyhollander1221 you are so lucky i was there. imagine someone you don't know kissing him.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@amanda.mccall why would you put that thought in my head??
lily @lilyhollander1221
need him looking exactly like this in my bed.
lily @lilyhollander1221
he's so hot i can't even formulate thoughts anymore.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@shanehollander marry me. seriously. we can build a wonderful life together.
nyc wags & habs
Holly Bennett
Oh my god, Rozanov, you are my new favorite person.
Ilya
this information does not leave this chat.
if any of your husbands/boyfriends bring this up i will happily spend several minutes in the penalty box.
you have been warned.
Kara Wagner
Oh, no, this is a state secret.
Kip Grady
mine already knows.
Ilya
that's because your old man boyfriend was sitting next to my young hot husband at the all star game our rookie year so he knows what 1221 means
and your old man boyfriend had to ruin my night by telling my young hot husband that he was in the room next door
"scott hunter is right next door" UGH
i had to wait TWO YEARS KIP GRADY. TWO YEARS.
Kip Grady
...is this why you hate scott?
Ilya
no. i hate scott because he survived the asteroid when the dinosaurs did not.
Kip Grady
that was a good one. jot that down.
Mary Huff
Did you just say rookie year?
You two have been together since your rookie year??
Ilya
no, summer before.
Holly Bennett
Awww you're like high school sweethearts, that's adorable.
Laurel Kelley (nick muller girlfriend)
brb gonna go watch one of those hollanov edits set to 18 with the knowledge that the song ACTUALLY FITS
lily @lilyhollander1221
alice @hollanov
you are such a softie sometimes.
Jackie Pike, Camille St-Simon, Grace Carmichael
Shane
Mitty called a couple hours ago, just wanted to tell me that my secret stayed in Montreal. It was really nice of him, actually.
Jackie Pike
And it took you this long to tell me?
Shane
...I was busy?
Jackie Pike
Busy doing what?
Shane
Reflect on if you actually want to know that answer and then get back to me.
Grace Carmichael
hot.
Chapter 41: end of a decade, start of an age
Chapter Text
Jackie Pike, Camille St-Simon, Grace Carmichael
Jackie Pike
It's been days, do you have an update yet??
Shane
Hold on
Oh, she's clearly forgotten I have her location
Give me a minute
Grace Carmichael
wait, where is she???
wait, actually, don't answer that, that feels like an invasion of privacy.
Camille St-Simon
Marlow just posted on insta!!!
Grace Carmichael
oh!!! she posted too!!
@marlowofficial✪
📍Nantucket, MA
@ilyarozanov wow. very aesthetically pleasing. well done, marly.
@marlowofficial @ilyarozanov who taught you that word?
@ilyarozanov @marlowofficial i am very smart, i taught myself.
@roselandry✪
east coast summer :)
@shanehollander ... respond to my texts.
@roselandry @shanehollander 🤭🫣
Jackie Pike, Camille St-Simon, Grace Carmichael, Rose Landry
you added Rose Landry to the conversation
Shane
Everyone be nice.
Rose Landry
hi everyone, this is Rose :)
Grace Carmichael
girl, you look so good in the picture you just posted.
Rose Landry
oh! thank you!! i've trained Cliff quickly. his first couple of attempts were pretty shit but we persevered.
Shane
Have you turned the Boston Bears Alternate Captain into an instagram boyfriend?
Rose Landry
you turned the boston bears ACTUAL captain into a simp who'd probably let you put him on a real leash if you fluttered your eyelashes enough.
Shane
Don't give him ideas.
Boston Bears💪
carmichael
Marlow.
Are you soft launching a relationship with Shane Hollander's ex girlfriend?
Who happens to be like a top ten most famous actress??
Ilya
can we all stop mentioning hollander dating rose landry?
thanks.
carmichael
You are not subtle, Cap.
marly
I don't know what you're talking about. I'm just enjoying my summer vacation.
connors
You're a shit liar Marlow.
INSTAGRAM (stories posted throughout the day that Shane is in Montreal)
Colin @colinmoore
Hold on... is Hollander back in Montreal???
mac @hockeyfan1992
It would appear so.
Colin @colinmoore
I feel like a widow in mourning.
ELI @elliot1999
Just watched Shane Hollander, Hayden Pike, and J.J. Boiziau come out of a tattoo parlor??
J.J. ✪ @jeanjboiziau
deal's a deal.
*attached photo of J.J., Hayden, and Shane holding up the sides of their t-shirts to show matching Roman numeral tattoos on their left sides. Hayden and J.J. just have 2015 & 2016, Shane also has 2017*
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
post more shirtless shane.
J.J. ✪ @jeanjboiziau
@vaughan19 you and hayden need to get it together, man. this is embarassing.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@jeanjboiziau let me live, J.J.
ava @hollander35
i really don't know what to do with the emotions that seeing them get matching tattoos 2 weeks after it's announced that none of them will be playing together anymore has evoked.
ava @hollander35
they're a matching set!! (trio?? idk what word to use) do not separate!!
Levi @levicarlson25
...like half the Voyageurs (INCLUDING HOLLANDER???) are at this club rn and I do not know how to react to that like a normal person.
ELI @elliot1999
What do you MEAN Hollander is in a club??
Levi @levicarlson25
@elliot1999 I mean I just watched him rip three back to back tequila shots while never once detaching himself from Hayden Pike.
Levi @levicarlson25
@elliot1999 it's fine though because Pike's wife is actively sitting in his lap.
shayden @haydenhollander 🔁 Levi @levicarlson25
they are never beating the throuple allegations.
Levi @levicarlson25
@elliot1999 it's fine though because Pike's wife is actively sitting in his lap.
shayden @haydenhollander
you know what?? i think maybe they're purposefully feeding the allegations because genuinely what other reason would there be for all of this?
ruby @hollanderNYC
this picture doesn't make it better🤭💀🫣
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
have i been replaced???
tanner ✪ @tanner06dillon
@luke15gillis if anything you replaced us and we momentarily stole him back.
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
@tanner06dillion he's ours and you can't have him😠😠
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@tanner06dillion yeah!! what breezy said!! back off😠
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I'm only 26 years old. I can't be responsible for this many children. @zaneboodramofficial you're taking custody of Tanner, right??
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
@shanehollander we can split. You take weekends and every other holiday.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@zaneboodramofficial deal.
Chris ✪ @christian.laine
@shanehollander I'm going with @mittymiitka but I'll still visit ❤️❤️
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@christian.laine works for me
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I think at least one of these children is technically mine.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@scotthunter it's me. I beat @CameronMcCormick in arm wrestling.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@nick29muller is that really how we decided that??
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
@scotthunter yes.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
too many people replied to me and i got confused so let this tweet stand as your reminder that only one of us lives with @shanehollander. thank you for your time.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis well said, bud❤️
ava @hollander35
...are they all just like, out on the town?? acting like nothing is abnormal about that???
shayden @haydenhollander
not only are they out on the town, they're apparently drunk enough to be dogpiling in the street??
ava @hollander35
right, of course, because that's normal behavior.
alice @hollanov
never let me drink with my (almost former🤞) coworkers again. i got way too close to admitting i run this account and then i would've had to flee to the north pole.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
would it really be that bad??
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY yes.
Chapter 42: ottawa
Chapter Text
Late July
max @holla.nov2481
hey... @shanehollander ... who tf is in your hammock, sir??
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
🏒🏒
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
...is this or is this not shane hollander's synthetic rink.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
We're getting on real ice in Ottawa ... right??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial promise.
ruby @hollanderNYC
i feel like there's a word for what's happening rn...
max @holla.nov2481
i believe they call it a soft launch.
alice @hollanov
NEW JOB. GET FUCKED M******* *********.
max @holla.nov2481
i feel like i'm on wheel of fortune
Early August (Ottawa)
maddie @evansmadeline
every time i'm at this airport i see ilya rozanov.
maddie @evansmadeline
what are you doing in OTTAWA bro??
Blake @blake98myers
went to pick my brother up at the airport ... ended up with a front row seat to this
*attached video starting a couple of seconds after Shane jumped out of the car. Luke jumps over his bags and runs toward Shane to hug him. Video then shows Ilya getting out of the car and joining their hug, cuts off when Luke moves to pick up his bag*
max @holla.nov2481
i've said it once, i'll say it a thousand times: LUKE GILLIS = HOLLANOV SON.
Ryan @admirals1987
I feel like @luke15gillis likes this dog better than he likes any human.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@admirals1987 sunny is my best friend but @shanehollander and @drewmcclean are tied for favorite human.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@luke15gillis ...um? hello?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@ilyarozanov okay fine, it's a three-way tie. люблю тебя, ilyusha.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
люблю тебя, сынок.
ruby @hollanderNYC
hey @holla.nov2481 i think maybe your luke gillis = hollanov son theory has some merit.
max @holla.nov2481
no shit.
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
just, y'know, by the way.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
люблю тебя, сынок.
* * *
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
good morning to everyone except @ilyarozanov who has pissed @shanehollander off so much already that i think we're all gonna die.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
what could he POSSIBLY have done AT 7:30 IN THE MORNING
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
@vaughan19 he ate 9 donuts and is now entirely refusing to drink water. he claims cherry coke "fuels him".
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@zaneboodramofficial all of you start praying that he doesn't try to smoke.
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
@scotthunter why would you put that into the universe??
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
📍Ottawa, Ontario
Micah @micahtaylor64
Several months ago I asked when Shane Hollander acquired a personality. I'm starting to realize I'd just been following the wrong accounts.
Micah @micahtaylor64
Apparently if you put him around the rookies all of the sudden he becomes a pledge master and, also, a stand up comedian.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Hey @shanehollander have you killed Rozanov yet? The people want to know.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I'll tell you what, Benny, I'm getting there.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
@ilyarozanov God speed, brother.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
for all concerned parties, i survived the day. anya has not been orphaned.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
also, unrelated to anything, this is me publicly pledging to eat a fruit and/or vegetable and also drink water tomorrow.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@ilyarozanov whipped.
tanner ✪ @tanner06dillon
i'd somehow already forgotten what it was like to train with hollzy. i can't feel my legs. someone help.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
yeah, you know what, the other week i said you couldn't have him ... maybe you can have him for a little while.
tanner ✪ @tanner06dillon
@nick29muller at least you guys have hunter and vaughny to chill him out. pike and boiziau just let him run wild.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@tanner06dillon if you think we were letting him run wild I would LOVE to see you try to complete his training plans before we got our hands on them.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
My training plans were not that crazy. I'm also actively lying to your faces. These things are unrelated.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
@shanehollander i love when hollzy's got jokes. it's my favorite part of the day.
* * *
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
Good morning @NYAdmirals were you aware that your first line center and left wing have created their own language??
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@marlowofficial we can nearly guarantee it's worse when @vaughan19 is there.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@marlowofficial I once watched those three hold an entire conversation in vague hums. No, I'm not kidding.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
@marlowofficial i'm pretty sure hollzy and vaughny can communicate through blinks. i'm also not kidding.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@CameronMcCormick that's because shane and i have a soul tie.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@vaughan19 stop trying to steal my man.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial 🔁 Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Tweeted while sitting in Hollander's lap. By the way.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@vaughan19 stop trying to steal my man.
ava @hollander35 🔁 Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
VINDICATION
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial 🔁 Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
tweeted while sitting in hollander's lap. by the way.
alice @hollanov
for what. seriously.
ava @hollander35
@hollanov you.
alice @hollanov
someone tell me it's wrong to threaten children on the internet.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i would never tell you that.
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 i'm going to find you irl and make you my best friend. just btw.
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
i don't know how to react to this.
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
i did not know until this moment that ilya rozanov could smile like that.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@BOS81 oh so you haven't seen this picture their child posted for ilya's birthday??
max @holla.nov2481
@BOS81 or this one that one of the other rookies posted??
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
@holla.nov2481 @ROZ81HOLLZY okay, so, this is just the 'hollander' effect????
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@BOS81 it would appear so, yes.
* * *
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
hey @shanehollander did you adopt another sibling for me??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@amanda.mccall I need one of you to draw me a diagram of which people are my children, which are my siblings, and who I'm apparently dating and/or married to. I'm getting confused.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@shanehollander i'll be so real. i tried. i gave up after a minute and a half.
J.J. ✪ @jeanjboiziau
petition for the canadian government to figure out how to clone people just so we can all have our own @shanehollander.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@jeanjboiziau I want a miniature version of him that I can keep in my pocket.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@jeanjboiziau @haydpike35 you're both really, really strange people.
Boston Bears💪
connors
what is happening in ottawa rn????
also, what did hollander do to our captain? this is not the roz i know. and now i'm scared for training camp.
pike
I've survived five years of Captain Shane Hollander training camps. I think you'll all be able to survive Ilya's version. Which, as far as I can tell, is pretty much the exact same thing just with the heightened fun of never knowing what's coming next.
Ilya
it will be same as always, just more organized.
also, this is not new. who do you think made me make a packing list??
st-simon
Was that before or after that roadie where you packed literally zero pairs of underwear?
Ilya
...he told me to do it before. i only listened after.
carmichael
That checks out.
varkov
I love being able to tell it's summer just because Rozy always has his Slavic fuck boy earrings in.
Ilya
oh, is that what we are calling them now??
varkov
What else would you call them?
tanner ✪ @tanner06dillon
I LOVE OTTAWA.
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
@tanner06dillon I'm happy to hear that but what could've possibly caused this reaction on a Wednesday night at 9pm?
tanner ✪ @tanner06dillon
@zaneboodramofficial David Hollander.
* * *
vivian @vivpeterson06
i think this might be ilya rozanov's biological son.
gen @genevieve1998
wrong, that is shane's baby.
max @holla.nov2481
you're both wrong, that is THEIR baby.
* * *
max @holla.nov2481
there is no way he just posted a picture of them with "my parents" IN RUSSIAN.
max @holla.nov2481
I LOVE BEING RIGHT.
alice @hollanov
who has been in charge of turning hollander into an artsy insta boy?? i want to be your friend.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hollanov it's been a joint effort.
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
@amanda.mccall you're doing god's work.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@alice_richter HOLD ON ONE GODDAMN MINUTE
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
@amanda.mccall 😉
alice @hollanov
just two dudes grilling. such father and son activities. cuties.
Colin @colinmoore
Did they just pack the whole crew up and drive like three hours to Lake Ontario??
Colin @colinmoore
I'm way too invested in this random group of players.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Someone should start a YouTube series with randomly selected players training together. Comedy gold mine.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i'm only seeing two silhouettes?? where is luke?
kara @hunter21
in every picture i've seen of the team he's sitting either at hollander's feet or directly next to him, i'd guess it's the former here.
* * *
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
i got to cuddle with sunny all night and i think it healed something in me.
@ilyarozanov✪
📍Ontario
📸 @zaneboodram
@shanehollander✪
📍Lake Ontario
📸 @zaneboodram
alice @hollanov
i think i finally understand what's happening.
max @holla.nov2481
SUSPICIOUSLY husband shaped behavior you two.
Chapter 43: training camp
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
day one is finally over (our boys are Very thankful), now onto day two!!
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
convinced the us government gave him the captain america super serum over the summer.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
I had to check twice that it was actually you that tweeted this. I was convinced it was a fan account.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@greghuffhockey what're you talking about?? this is a fan account. i am shane hollander's #3 fan.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@vaughan19 not #1?
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@greghuffhockey i know my place.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i want to leave bite marks in his biceps.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@lilyhollander1221 i mean, i'll ask if he's into it and let you know.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
How many times do I have to tell you that I'm Captain America and he's the Winter Soldier??
kara @hunter21 🔁 Scott ✪ @scotthunter
genuinely how is this meant to be taken.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
How many times do I have to tell you that I'm Captain America and he's the Winter Soldier??
kara @hunter21
scott hunter stop flirting with shane hollander challenge: failed SPECTACULARLY
shayden @haydenhollander
i'm sorry ... is this a tattoo??
shayden @haydenhollander
like clearly he got the matching tattoos with jj and hayden but this is different...
shayden @haydenhollander
what does 1410 mean??? someone add this to a conspiracy board somewhere. i'd do it but i fear i'm not organized enough.
alice @hollanov 🔁 shayden @haydenhollander
this is very much giving "if you like causing trouble up in hotel rooms"
shayden @haydenhollander
i'm sorry ... is this a tattoo??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
We're back :)
(missed you @scotthunter ❤️)
📍 Tarrytown, NY
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
they're saying Back and Better Than Ever??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 funny, I've heard the same thing.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
you take the prettiest pictures of my boyfriend. i think i love you.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@kipgrady you THINK?? Rude.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@shanehollander no i KNOW i just didn't want to make scott jealous.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@kipgrady he's already jealous seeing as we're young and pretty and he's a relic of the byzantine empire. might as well run wild.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@shanehollander well, when you put it like that...
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
sometimes shane says things and i just have to wonder if he's gay or has simply been trained in the art of queening out.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
it really could be either one. maybe it's both. who knows.
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
good morning NY fans. @luke15gillis is here bright and early because, apparently, @shanehollander doesn't trust him to drive to the facility by himself.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
i got lost ONE time.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15gillis we live 14 minutes away. You only have to turn two times. Also, you got lost far more than once.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@shanehollander just because you're right doesn't mean i want to hear it.
ruby @hollanderNYC
on god... are ALL of the admirals hot??
kara @hunter21
@hollanderNYC yes.
семья (sunny & anya fanclub)
Luke
you're slowing down in your old age.
rozy
you better not be talking about me, young man.
Luke
i made a presentation
do you want to see it?
rozy
i want you to never call me old again
Luke
too late.
boston publishes stats from day one of training camp
did you know that?
well, every team does
but shane and i both got faster this year
you, though...
you slowed down by 0.05 seconds
how does that feel?
rozy
is this rage bait?
i scored higher or same on every single test except ONE
and you are calling me old?
Luke
you're slowing down
you can't argue
the stats don't lie
rozy
i am not old.
scott hunter is old
i am young, like child. like newborn baby.
you want old? go down hall to wherever shane is hiding with vaughan and their dinosaur friend.
there, you will find old.
ты меня оскорбляешь
how dare.
i am not old!
ты называешь меня старым
you know what.
i have proof!
Luke
proof that you're not old?
that had to have been hard to find.
rozy
proof!
i am not even oldest person in this groupchat!
so take your insults back!
where did you go.
you are proven wrong so you stop responding??
i know you have not started practice yet, i have access to both of your calendars.
there is a family google calendar, i know you have another half hour until camp starts.
Luke
okay, fine
you've proven me wrong.
rozy
good.
Luke
i hope camp goes well, ilyusha.
i miss you❤️
rozy
i miss you too, cынок
tell shane i miss him, i know he is not on his phone
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
day two ✅
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
a little recap:
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
coaching staff stuck every youngin with @shanehollander and he now has a GAGGLE of ducklings following him around
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@scotthunter is a fearless leader (which is necessary because there are currently 54 people with blades attached to their feet running around this building)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@vaughan19 only got distracted twice by @shanehollander's biceps ... the same cannot be said for @nick29muller
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@bennettofficial convinced everyone in Captain Hollander's group that they needed to perform a seance on the goals then committed too hard to the bit and nearly set off the fire suppression system.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
can't believe i'm getting put on blast for admiring hollzy's summer gains.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@vaughan19 only got distracted twice by @shanehollander's biceps ... the same cannot be said for @nick29muller
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
"Nearly" is a BIT of a stretch.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@bennettofficial convinced everyone in Captain Hollander's group that they needed to perform a seance on the goals then committed too hard to the bit and nearly set off the fire suppression system.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@jallomatti @luke15gillis what do you two think? Is "nearly" a stretch?? (I think not.)
Matti ✪ @jallomatti
@bennettofficial there was a lot of smoke...
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@bennettofficial i mostly just want to know where you got that many candles on such short notice.
ruby @hollanderNYC
things i learned today: all the admirals are hot & they are all in love with shane hollander.
max @holla.nov2481
is this uncle ilya reporting for duty????
alice @hollanov
something about NY's day ending in bennett nearly setting fire to the building vs. boston's day ending with rozanov hanging out with puppies and babies feels ...off
max @holla.nov2481
Chapter 44: stanley cup day
Chapter Text
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I feel like a dad on school picture day right now.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Remember when he was just following you around trying to be adopted by sheer force of will?? Look how far we've come 🥲🥲
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Hey... uh... @shanehollander @scotthunter if you're looking for your kids, they've invaded my backyard
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Make sure he wears sunscreen. He always forgets.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Still not sure how I ended up with custody. I'm still calling @shanehollander Rook. I don't think I was ready for more children.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter did you just admit you were old enough to be my dad??
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander FOR THE LAST TIME. I AM ONLY SEVEN YEARS OLDER THAN YOU.
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
back in the garden for game one of preseason❤️
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
someone is letting these two wear carter and shane's As tonight ... they're all grown up 🥹
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
wooowwww @nick29muller @luke15gillis looking good boys
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@CameronMcCormick 😘😘
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
stole holly's A :)
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Take good care of it❤️
gen @genevieve1998
i think we need to talk a little more about how hot luke gillis is.
Colin @colinmoore
I feel like scratching Rozanov, Marlow, Pike, Comeau, and Kent from this game was purposeful.
Colin @colinmoore
Though I'm a little afraid that this is just going to make them all even more feral when you let them back on the ice during the first regular season MTL v. BOS game...
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
final game of preseason. see you tonight @NHLFlyers
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis & @conor71mclaughlin are in the building!!
kara @hunter21
i'm sensing a new rpf spiral...
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
genetics are crazy
*two pictures: the one on the left is Shane in New York's away jersey, standing at the gates during the prior season's last game v. Philadelphia fistbumping everyone as they leave the ice. Scott is the person fistbumping Shane in the picture (he's 2nd to last off the ice and for those in the know (us. because i'm the one writing this and you're the one reading it) he sort of just lets shane be the last one off because he's more particular about his routines even though scott wouldn't point that out out loud b/c he doesn't want shane to feel bad about it), the second picture is Luke doing the same thing during their preseason game, he's wearing the A*
mac @hockeyfan1992
Well this is just painfully wholesome
* * *
The Center @LGBTCenterNYC
thank you to @scotthunter and the rest of the NY Admirals for visiting The Center today! it was an honor to host all of you and the Stanley Cup
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@LGBTCenterNYC was kind enough to host our team for a visit today. we had a great time learning about the work The Center does.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the Admirals organization and our players (led by @scotthunter) have made donations and we hope that many of you will join us. check out their website for more information:
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Thank you @LGBTCenterNYC for letting us visit. It was incredible to use my day with the Stanley Cup to help give back to a community I'm finally starting to feel like I'm allowed to be a part of.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
The @NYAdmirals, my teammates, and I made donations to The Center and we hope that, if you're able, you'll join us in doing so. Check out their website for more information:
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
This was truly an incredible day. Thank you to everyone who had a part in it.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
so sorry to boston but i am starting to feel real fond of the admirals (no one tell my dad)
kara @hunter21
how much do you guys think the commissioner hates this?
alice @hollanov
i hope it keeps him up at night.
ava @hollander35
he gives me cartoon villain vibes i do not like him.
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we CANNOT WAIT for the @AliForneyCenter to get here for @shanehollander's day with the Stanley Cup
*picture of Shane, Luke, and Eric smiling in front of a table full of Admirals merch set up in the lobby of the practice facility*
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
for those who don't know: the @AliForneyCenter is an incredible non-profit that provides shelter and support services for homeless LGBTQ+ youth.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
they have done so much incredible work and we are so grateful for the chance to host them for a field trip for some of the young people in their program.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the Admirals organization along with members of our team (led by @shanehollander) have made donations to support their work. check out their website for more information:
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
The @AliForneyCenter is based on a cause that is so close to my heart and I feel so incredibly lucky to be able to do even a little to help them in their mission.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you to the @NYAdmirals and to each of my teammates for sharing your time with me and the @AliForneyCenter today. I had such a great time.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
If you're able, I hope you'll join me (and the Admirals organization and my team) in donating. Check out their website for more information:
max @holla.nov2481
"close to my heart" and it's an organization that helps homeless LGBTQ youth ... who does he know that was hurt and who do i need to help him hunt down
max @holla.nov2481
i'm so serious i will go to war with this man. @shanehollander just give me the address. we ride at dawn.
shayden @haydenhollander
i've decided that this is him adopting every queer kid who's been kicked out of their homes or pushed out of their families. you are papa now, @shanehollander.
Chapter 45: season opener
Chapter Text
rosie ✪ @roselandry
ditching la for boston for the weekend :)
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Boo Boston!!! Come to NYC instead!!
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@shanehollander you're a menace and i dislike you on principle.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@roselandry don't lie Rosie, it's not very kind
kara @hunter21
i feel like there's a whole new mystery afoot RE: rose landry and the city of boston.
vivian @vivpeterson06
yes, because why is she calling shane a menace simply for telling her to come to nyc?? what's in boston, landry?? what does shane know??
* * *
Mac ✪ @conor71mclaughlin
season opener v. colorado tonight! #Admirals🗽
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
real photo taken just this morning of rookie @conor71mclaughlin !!
happy first season opener, mac.
Mac ✪ @conor71mclaughlin
... bruh
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Aww! The baby!! We love you @conor71mclaughlin ❤️❤️
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
hey @luke15gillis how does it feel to no longer be the youngest?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
not gonna lie, @vaughan19, it feels pretty good
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
new york HAS to be recruiting based on looks at this point this is absurd.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Please nobody speak to me about how much my child has grown😭😭
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
why would you do this to me😭😭
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
our mascot is all grown up 🥲
семья (sunny & anya fanclub)
rozy
happy season opener everyone!!
hollzy
Happy season opener❤️
Ilya, you should add Luca to this chat
rozy
... i still need to tell him that i am lawfully wedded to shane hollander ...
hollzy
Ilya.
rozy
yes, yes, i am sorry котик. i will tell him soon i just keep forgetting.
Luke
i'm sorry?
you keep FORGETTING you're married???
i feel like that doesn't help your case, rozy.
but happy season opener anyways🙄
rozy
NO!
i do not forget i am married!! i just forget to TELL!
do not do me dirty like that Lucas McGregor.
Luke
ooohhhh full name!!
i'm in trouble now, folks!
hollzy
You're both insane.
I love you all the more for it, though.
Ilya, tell the kid we're married before he accidentally finds out and has a stroke.
Please?
For me?
rozy
yes, yes, i will remember!
love you both!!
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
my game day buddy :)
Luca ✪ @haas72official
game day #Bears🐻
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
oh good the boston rookie's hot too. good lord.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Happy season opener, Boston!
(a week and a half later...)
boston wags :)
Claire Feller
Hi, Jane, your husband might've just let us in on a little secret
Shane
Fucking finally.
Hello, everyone.
It's me, Shane Hollander, former Captain of the Montreal Voyageurs and Ilya Rozanov's greatest enemy.
Also his husband. Two things can be true.
Anna Varkov
okay, well, that explains a lot actually.
namely why rozanov and pike have (mostly) stopped being total dicks to each other.
and also a little bit why the pair of you checking each other against the boards was at least 45% more sexually charged than that action should ever be
Jackie Pike
That "mostly" is doing a lot of heavy lifting
Natalie Connors
I feel like we're ignoring the arguably more insane piece of information we were just given
Shane
Oh, did Cliff finally fess up?
Natalie Connors
Your darling husband sort of did it for him.
To be fair, it came directly on the back of Cliff sort of setting up the "Shane Hollander is Ilya's Husband" conversation because he is incapable of hiding his reactions
Shane
Right, well, that makes sense.
Did he at least tell Luca Haas before telling everyone else?
Grace Carmichael
no, he did not and it looks like the rookie is about to implode.
Shane
That man does horrifying things to my blood pressure.
you added Rose Landry to the conversation
Shane
Hi there, Rosie.
Your boyfriend and my husband spilled the beans.
Rose Landry
did my boyfriend thank you for being gay?
again?
Camille St-Simon
No😂
But Rozanov did mention that he had...
Chapter 46: cross my heart
Notes:
the rangers 10th game of the 2017-18 season really truly was against the sharks... however, in the real world, new york lost.
Chapter Text
семья (sunny & anya fanclub)
you added Luca Haas to the conversation
Ilya
welcome to the family, haasy
Shane❤️🏒
Finally
I was about two days away from getting his number from Cliff and taking care of it myself
Welcome, Luca.
Haasy
Thank you, Shane Hollander
Gilly
did you just call him by his full name?
that's embarrassing, bro.
Ilya
remember when shane told you that you were a good player and then you admitted to having to run fifteen miles because you got so excited?
Gilly
i thought we agreed to never speak of that again.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
in case you forgot: the admirals are currently 9-0.
see you tonight, @SanJoseSharks
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we appear to have acquired a new cameraman...
kara @hunter21
i'm calling it, this is our new ship.
max @holla.nov2481
@hunter21 ...i'm with you. what are we calling them, though??
kara @hunter21
@holla.nov2481 we have so many options to work with. lunor, mcgillis, gillaughlin
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hunter21 @holla.nov2481 how about gillmac??
kara @hunter21
introducing: gillmac.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@shanehollander go control your child, he's going to break the camera.
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
you have no faith in me.
ruby @hollanderMTL
starting to think the admirals really do know lily personally...
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
vaughan to hollander for goal # 1
NYC 1 - SJS 0 | P1 08:13
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
THE ROOKIE BRINGS US TO TWO! FIRST CAREER GOAL FOR @conor71mclaughlin !!!
NYC 2 - SJS 0 | P2 12:06
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@shanehollander & @vaughan19 just combined for yet another goal
NYC 3 - SJS 0 | P3 03:59
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
and that's the game!!
NYC 3 - SJS 0
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we are 10-0 on the season. see you on thursday @ArizonaCoyotes!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
first career goal for @conor71mclaughlin !!!
Chapter 47: taste the blood inside my mouth
Chapter Text
peteyyy @peterbriggs
Well, I guess this explains why I saw Ilya Rozanov walking Shane Hollander's dog last night
(everyone pretend this picture has two humans and a dog in it ... i couldn't find a better option)
peteyyy @peterbriggs
But, also, it sort of explains nothing and leaves me with about 12 more questions.
max @holla.nov2481
ilya just posted a picture of shane, luke, and shane's dog on his ig story at 6:30 in the morning. sure, why the hell not.
alice @hollanov
i made a new best friend today and none of you will ever guess who it is.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanov i think i can guess
alice @hollanov
@lilyhollander1221 you don't count.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
am i to understand that alice and lily have somehow met in real life??
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i'm afraid.
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY you probably should be, to be quite honest.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
i am having a very strange night.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@haas72official did roz take you to hollzy's?
Luca ✪ @haas72official
@marlowofficial yes. pike is here too.
Victor ✪ @st.simonofficial
@haas72official well that certainly wouldn't make anything any more normal.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
see you tonight, @VoyageursMTL ☺️
Colin @colinmoore
That emoji feels like a threat.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
we're playing in mtl tonight. in unrelated news, taylor swift recently released a great single.
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
i will pay you ten whole us dollars to blast look what you made me do in that locker room.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@alice_richter you drive a hard bargain. done.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15gillis' brand new warmup routine in action...
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
MAJOR little brother energy from luke gillis here.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the kid is locked in. see you in 10 mtl.
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
Bon retour, Capitaine.
Welcome back, Captain.
@shanehollander #Voyageurs⚜️
alice @hollanov
i am feeling angry and vaguely homicidal.
alice @hollanov
i'd somehow forgotten how young he was in mtl
alice @hollanov
look at this child. protect him at all costs.
shayden @haydenhollander
remember when he used to wear wired headphones like it was 2002😭😭😭
lily @lilyhollander1221
he's always been so pretty🥹😍🤩 montreal you did not deserve him.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
LUKE GILLIS WITH THE FIRST GOAL OF THE GAME!!
NYC 1 - MTL 0 | P1 19:32
NHL Fight Alert @nhlfightalert
Shane Hollander (NYC) vs Dallas Kent (MTL) #NYCvsMTL
ruby @hollanderNYC
well ... that didn't take long
Colin @colinmoore
get him again, hollzy.
alice @hollanov 🔁 Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
i don't think he appreciated the welcome back much...
Montreal Voyageurs ✪ @VoyageursMTL
Bon retour, Capitaine.
Welcome back, Captain.
@shanehollander #Voyageurs⚜️
alice @hollanov
anyways, HIT HIM HARDER SHANE.
kara @hunter21
i think my favorite reaction when they panned to the bench was scott just looking bewildered
kara @hunter21
he clearly did not expect shane to actually fight
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
19:32 on the clock in the first, New York's Shane Hollander issued 5-min major for fighting, Montreal's Dallas Kent issued 5-min major for fighting, 2-min minor and 10-min misconduct for instigating.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Shining example of the highest hockey IQ in the League.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Everyone always talks about it RE: plays but this was a PERFECT example of his hockey IQ. He clearly pulled that penalty.
mac @hockeyfan1992
Shane Hollander you will always be famous.
mac @hockeyfan1992
(also, I think you should hit him even harder next time)
kara @hunter21
real life gif of shane hollander in the penalty box rn.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i feel lightheaded.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
this 90 second bullshit to honor the captain who brought you two whole stanley cups montreal you shall burn in the pits of hell.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
shane hollander you are too good for this world.
Colin @colinmoore
Let's all get together and agree to pretend I never publicly supported the Montreal Voyageurs. Cool? Okay. Thanks.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
😉😘
gen @genevieve1998
oh this is too good😂
hollanov and three straight(?) men
Cliff Marlow
Roz is barking at the TV right now.
Like actually barking.
Ilya
he tells the truth.
Hayd
Hit him again, Holly.
Cliff Marlow
We don't play them until January...
Gives me a lot of time to figure out how to bait him into a fight
How'd you do it, Hollander?
J.J.
five bucks says he asked kent if he was hitting on him
Hayd
You're probably right
Cliff Marlow
I want to say it probably took more than that but I have very little faith in Dallas Kent so you're probably right, Boiziau.
-
Ilya
okay, game's over, new york won (who is shocked? not me). shane: what did you say to kent?
Shane
J.J. was right
Also, Ilya, barking? Really?
Ilya
it was so hot i did not know how else to express myself.
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
some really important things happening at practice today...
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
meaning they asked @shanehollander and i to watch them fight like a kid telling their mom to watch them do a handstand in a hotel pool.
Chapter 48: the irina foundation
Notes:
reputation dropped two days after the bruins v. rangers game in november of 2017 but let's all close our eyes and pretend that it actually dropped before because i need amanda to make an end game reference thank you and goodnight.
Chapter Text
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
and that's an undefeated october, folks #Admirals🗽
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Happy Halloween @shanehollander
(this is scott and shane. this is not anthony edwards and tom cruise. i am hypnotizing you to believe this.)
kara @hunter21
which could mean nothing...
gen @genevieve1998
oh there's just no way.
vivian @vivpeterson06
next thing you know he's gonna be saying that destiel reminds him of him and shane
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
and of course kip is dressed as charlie blackwood. of course he is.
ruby @hollanderNYC
is roz hidden somewhere dressed as iceman?? that's genuinely the only thing that could make this more insane.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
happy halloween!!
📍the Kingfisher
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
me and @shanehollander in case you were wondering
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
You, Christopher Grady, are a shit disturber.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@greghuffhockey proudly😘
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
dumb and dumber is also what @scotthunter calls these two when he can't be bothered to remember their real names
max @holla.nov2481
not shocked that hollanov's son is wearing a matching costume with his homoerotic best friend. literally nothing about that shocks me.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NY v. Boston tonight!!! (we are currently 16-0, in case you'd forgotten)
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
shayden @haydenhollander
shane and hayden are finally back on the same ice🥺🥺
alice @hollanov
you know who else is there?? ilya rozanov.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
what was it that taylor said about a couple of big reputations??
alice @hollanov
knew (him) when i was young / reconnected when we were older
kara @hunter21
are the admirals deadass shipping hollanov on main right now.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Captain America just scored.
NYC 1 - BOS 0 | P2 11:12
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
their captain scores, our captain scores.
BOS 1 - NYC 1 | P3 05:11
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
going into overtime for the first time this season
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
live shot of @shanehollander's overtime goal:
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
admirals win 2-1 💪
* * *
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
www.irinafoundation.org
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
max @holla.nov2481
i'm sorry ... are ilya and shane about to do a press conference *together* ???
max @holla.nov2481
the media advisory came from a foundation page but ... what if they're actually *gun shots*
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
no because i'm picking up what you're putting down
alice @hollanov
they have no right to look this good while announcing a charity. @yunahollander get them on the runway.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you @shanehollander for coming up with this incredible idea and for asking me to join you
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
Shane is my best friend (sorry @marlowofficial) and I am honored to be launching the @irinafoundation with him.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
это для тебя. я люблю тебя, мама.
translate from Russian: this is for you. i love you, mama.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
There's no one else I'd rather do this with.
Honored to announce the @irinafoundation alongside @ilyarozanov.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Irina, thank you for my best friend. I hope we're making you proud.
max @holla.nov2481
this might as well have been a relationship announcement good god
max @holla.nov2481
"thank you for my best friend" why don't you just SHOOT ME, HOLLANDER
max @holla.nov2481
hey @shanehollander #controlit buddy
shayden @haydenhollander
...i think it might be time to hang up my figurative skates these two are not subtle
shayden @haydenhollander
human embodiment of heart eyes over here
Yuna @YunaHollander
So proud of my boys 🤍🤍
@irinafoundation @shanehollander @ilyarozanov
kara @hunter21
and now yuna hollander is shipping hollanov on main. i'm gonna log out for a couple of days i think.
Chapter 49: our house
Chapter Text
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
yay @drewmcclean!!
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
They made me drive to Connecticut.
@luke15gillis @conor71mclaughlin
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
it really didn't take much convincing...
Sacred Heart University Men's Ice Hockey @sacredheartmih
We have some special visitors in the crowd tonight. Thank you for showing up to support college hockey @NYAdmirals!
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
thanks for having us!! sorry you lost! (no i'm not. go @drewmcclean)
Drew @drewmcclean
@luke15gillis thanks for bringing a whole pack of NHLers to our game. that wasn't intimidating at all.
Chapter 50: time makes you bolder
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Larry @lawrencesmith
Went to walk my dog on the beach path and saw Shane Hollander and Eric Bennett just sitting in a car in the parking lot staring at the ocean??
Taylor @taylorgates
okay well Ilya Rozanov and Luke Gillis just walked into the restaurant i work at for lunch so it's a weird day all around
Penny @stokes.penelope 🔁 Larry@lawrencesmith
okay i just watched them walk into a building on the lower east side and one of my friends saw them somewhere else in north shore. what sort of strange odyssey are those two on??
Larry @lawrencesmith
Went to walk my dog on the beach path and saw Shane Hollander and Eric Bennett just sitting in a car in the parking lot staring at the ocean??
Colin @colinmoore
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we love kip in this house.
kara @hunter21
oh look, very hot man somehow got hotter
gen @genevieve1998
is scott's boyfriend sitting with ilya rozanov??
vivian @vivpeterson06
yes and it would appear that scott and shane are teasing each other about who's in the crowd.
gen @genevieve1998
@vivpeterson06 just blushing like idiots
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i feel a little crazy pointing this out, but scott and shane seem different tonight??
kara @hunter21
they're acting like normal again which makes me realize they were acting ... not normal (for them) the past few games?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hunter21 the girls were fighting.
Notes:
the next chapter of this is gonna be ridiculous because it has all the photoshoots and christmas and new years and the winter classic so it may take me a minute to put together
Chapter 51: leave the christmas lights up 'til january
Chapter Text
GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
BTS with hockey's favorite friends :)
alice @hollanov
friends. HA! good one.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i too sit on my friend's lap grinning like a crazy person. it's how i spend all my free time.
CULTURED Magazine @cultured_mag
@ilyarozanov
max @holla.nov2481
@shanehollander share him. don't be greedy.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
Today feels like the day to give in to Amanda and Luke's begging.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
i still don't understand what 'dutchman' means
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@fishhavegills what's my last name.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@dutchman Hollander.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@fishhavegills and what do you call a person from Holland?
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@dutchman OHHHH good one.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@dutchman welcome.
alice @hollanov
do these two fuckers seriously have matching tattoos.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
Matching tattoos are really friendly behavior!!
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
@dutchman go away.
ruby @hollanderNYC
i'm just deeply confused by what 1410 could possibly mean. is it a non-american ordered date?? october 14th?? is it an address?? coordinates??
alice @hollanov
every day it gets harder to act normal.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you @cultured_mag
shane 🔒 @dutchman
Please put on pants I'm losing my mind.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
ROZY 😍🔥
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
is now a good time to mention (again) that i am 110% convinced these two have been to paris.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
ROZY 😍🔥
ruby @hollanderNYC
...you're probably not wrong
shane 🔒 @dutchman
So friendly.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
His whole ass was out of these sweatpants btw. Made it incredibly difficult to focus.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@dutchman i didn't need to know all that.
shane 🔒 @dutchman 🔁 liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
What does this mean.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
is now a good time to mention (again) that i am 110% convinced these two have been to paris.
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
nothing do not google it.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
google it please i don't want to have to explain it
shane 🔒 @dutchman
I hate Cliff Marlow.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
he's also dating your ex-girlfriend and he knocked you out and remember when he checked me really hard last year??
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@fishhavegills what is your angle.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@fishhavegills oh my god you're still mad that I let him hang out with Sunny while you were on the road.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@dutchman no comment.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander I thought we were hockey's favorite friends :(
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35 you're still my favorite friend don't worry❤️
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
is he...
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
feeding shayden shippers as retaliation for the paris comment? yes.
@ilyarozanov✪
📍Los Angeles, California
@luke15gillis✪ bro thinks he's too cool for captions.
@svetrova very pretty, ilyushka
@shanehollander✪ Why am I not shocked that you put the fully clothed picture second?
Victor ✪ @st.simonofficial
Our captain is hotter than yours @NYAdmirals
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@st.simonofficial why am I catching strays?
Victor ✪ @st.simonofficial
@scotthunter who taught you that phrase, grandpa?
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
@st.simonofficial me. also, hollzy and vaughny are objectively more attractive than cliff so we win.
Victor ✪ @st.simonofficial
@luke15gillis you got me there.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@st.simonofficial ???
Victor ✪ @st.simonofficial
@marlowofficial sorry, I don't want to be on Hollzy's bad side. Fend for yourself.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
One month ahead of the Winter Classic, the #Admirals🗽 will be holding open (outdoor) practice at Lasker Rink in Central Park tomorrow (12.02.2017). This will be our first outdoor practice since 2003!!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
We're looking forward to seeing all of you there!
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@scotthunter stealing our equipment managers' jobs
gen @genevieve1998
does this hurt the horse?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
thanks to everyone who came out to watch us practice!! see you in ONE MONTH at the Winter Classic #Admirals🗽
* * *
GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
the shot:
GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
and the set up:
GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
😍😍
☘️☘️ @princessshane
what the fuck i mean. really. what the fuck.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
oh this is just indecent
GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
the shot:
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
they're so hot and theres about 45 hollanov comments i could make but i'm primarily distracted by the fact that ILYA ROZANOV is actually smiling.
GQ Magazine ✪ @GQMagazine
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander I think it's high time Yuna gets you a Calvin Klein ad 🥵🥵
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35 how high up is that emoji in your most used?
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander embarrassingly so.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
thank you @GQMagazine
alice @hollanov
"friends"
ruby @hollanderNYC
the closet is well and truly glass at this point, boys
max @holla.nov2481
oh they've explored each other's bodies.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@shanehollander why can't we do a photoshoot like this?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 name the time and place.
kara @hunter21
it's like all carter vaughan does every day is wake up, play hockey, and flirt with shane hollander.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
😉 @GQMagazine @shanehollander
ruby @hollanderNYC
THIS ONE'S SOMEHOW WORSE?
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
Hollzy got jacked?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@marlowofficial you're on thin ice.
@shanehollander✪
Thank you @gq
@holla.nov2481 no solo shot just you and roz. right.
@roz81hollzy and with the whole matching tattoo visible.
@ilyarozanov✪
@katiematthews and the picture with shane first i said oh i'm sure
@roselandry✪ @shanehollander your freckles look really good in this one
* * *
CULTURED Magazine @cultured_mag
@ilyarozanov's issue of CULTURED magazine will be hitting the shelves this January. Preorder here: www.cultured.fakewebsite:)
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@shaneshusband just walking around with your tits out. Indecent.
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
@dutchman 😘
* * *
rosie ✪ @roselandry
hey @marlowofficial 😘
max @holla.nov2481
dating cliff and shane. greedy. they are also greedy getting to date you. everyone involved is GREEDY.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
😘😘
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Looking great. Rose. Specifically.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@roselandry :)
📍 Boston, MA
rosie ✪ @roselandry
❤️
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Be nice to her or else.
ruby @hollanderNYC
what beef does shane have with marlow he's not letting that man breathe
shane 🔒 @dutchman 🔁 ruby @hollanderNYC
I'm just being a bitch because it's entertaining and my life's too boring rn
ruby @hollanderNYC
what beef does shane have with marlow he's not letting that man breathe
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
boring??? we've had a game like every goddamn day since october. it is not boring.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@fishhavegills correct and now we've had two days off and idk what to do with myself. Thus, being a bitch to Cliff.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@dutchman to each their own ig
rosie ✪ @roselandry
i love boston i love the pikes i love babies (i also love @shanehollander who took this picture)
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
welcome to the garden @roselandry
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
shane in the box with rose and a pike kid 😭😭😭 he's so pretty.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
he's also in a bears shirt and a jacket that's a size too big which makes me think it's probably ilya's but i don't have time to process all that right now
alice @hollanov
roz blushing like mad while blowing a kiss to shane's suite. @ilyarozanov have some decorum.
alice @hollanov
why am i just now noticing that ilya does the ring kiss celly too?? boys. please. i can't do this.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
BEARS WIN.
Game Final | BOS 7 - CBJ 2
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
oh good he's on media with pike again. what could go wrong.
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
did he ... did he just *compliment* hayden pike?
shayden @haydenhollander
hayden saying he misses playing with shane :( i could cry why were they separated
alice @hollanov
"i have known him the longest" right. get it together.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
📍 Rockefeller Center, NYC
max @holla.nov2481
are they on a skating date rn.
max @holla.nov2481
there has been too much hollanov content. i feel like i'm drowning. someone give me a break. i can't process all of this at once.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
📍 New York, New York
Luke ✪ @luke15gillis
hey uh @shanehollander i think a reindeer invaded our house???
NHL ✪ @NHL
Nearly ready for you @NYAdmirals @BuffaloSabres
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
😉
ruby @hollanderNYC
DOES THAT SAY HOLLANDER?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
#Admirals🗽 lines today
L. HOLLANDER - HOLLANDER - VAUGHAN
WAGNER - HUNTER - HUFF
McCORMICK - McLAUGHLIN - MULLER
ARMSTRONG - PRENTICE - KAY
ruby @hollanderNYC
i repeat: DOES THAT SAY HOLLANDER?
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
I GET TO BE ON THE BROTHER LINE!!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@luke15hollander @shanehollander your jerseys are ready, boys.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
WHAT IS HAPPENING RIGHT NOW
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
I GET TO BE ON THE BROTHER LINE!!
Colin @colinmoore
This has got to be a prank right??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Someone's a little busy playing sewer so I guess the responsibility falls to me.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Luke's officially been a Hollander since early last month. It was something we started talking about over the summer and a decision that wasn't made lightly.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I hope you'll respect our family's privacy and allow Luke to tell his story on his own time. That said, I am incredibly excited that we're now legally family.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Found families are important and the connections you choose to make are just as valid as those made by blood. I can't wait to get on the ice with my brother.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Also, just an apology in advance to the announcers who now have to call Hollander to Hollander connections. I could probably talk Vaughny into changing his name, too, if that'd make it easier.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
yes. announcers everywhere, feel free to call me hollander. i'll answer to it. promise.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Also, just an apology in advance to the announcers who now have to call Hollander to Hollander connections. I could probably talk Vaughny into changing his name, too, if that'd make it easier.
NHL ✪ @NHL
Jackie @jackiepike
hey @shanehollander its goddamn FRIGID out here you are so lucky i love you.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
@jackiepike seconded
Grace @g.carmichael
@jackiepike @roselandry thirded?
Camille @cami_st.simon
@jackiepike @roselandry @g.carmichael fourthed. also @shanehollander why did you let us stay out last night? i can feel my pulse in my forehead.
kara @hunter21
why are all the boston wags at the admirals game cheering for shane.
max @holla.nov2481
@hunter21 i have a theory.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
ruby @hollanderNYC
why is luke standing ON TOP of conor?
ava @hollander35
@hollanderNYC do they need a new shipname now that he's no longer gillis??
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hollander35 i don't have the mental energy for that rn
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
NYA 0 - BUF 0 at the end of the first.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GOAL @scotthunter!
NYA 1 - BUF 0 | P2 12:08
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
back on for the third and @TommyAnderssonNHL is on the ice!
Colin @colinmoore
Bennett is hiding in the tunnel behind the space heaters, isn't he?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
buffalo goal :(
NYA 1 - BUF 1 | P3 03:18
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
OUR FIRST OFFICIAL HOLLANDER TO HOLLANDER GOAL TO WIN IT IN OVERTIME!!!
GOAL L. HOLLANDER, ASSIST S. HOLLANDER.
NYA 2 - BUF 1 | OT 05:54
kara @hunter21
oh that is buzzy as hell
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
my fingers are freezing off typing this but good goal @luke15hollander
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
congratulating your brother in law, maybe? 🤨
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
ADMIRALS WIN.
GAME FINAL | NYA 2 - BUF 1
NHL ✪ @NHL
Congratulations @NYAdmirals
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
good game @BuffaloSabres
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
got an assist from my big brother in overtime ❤️
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
❤️
Scott ✪ @scotthunter 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
@luke15hollander you really called this one, huh?
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
hey dad (@scotthunter) when is my new big brother coming home??
Chapter 52: i need sunshine
Chapter Text
NHL ✪ @NHL
good afternoon from All Star Weekend 2018!
NHL ✪ @NHL
we sat down for an interview with the captains of the Atlantic and Metro teams, hope you enjoy!
kara @hunter21
rozanov with his shirt half open and hollander with his hand on rozanov's knee. right. subtle.
Colin @colinmoore
Thinking back to last year's All Stars when I wasn't yet aware that Hollanov existed ... my life was much less entertaining
max @holla.nov2481
right.
alice @hollanov
my brothers in christ. what the fuck is your problem.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
Really, truly did not realize in the moment just how insane we looked. Oops.
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
we are too in love we cannot help it
NHL ✪ @NHL
Congrats to Team Hollander (Metro) on your win. They'll face off against Team Smith (Pacific) tonight at 7pm!
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Hey @ilyarozanov what's it feel like to lose??
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
i will remind you in boston next week
* * *
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Forced me to buy her lunch AND stole my dog. Why do I put up with you @amanda_mccall??
📍Boston, MA
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
because i stuck to you like a barnacle several months back and have since refused to be removed?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
if i weren't so convinced shane hollander is gay i might just be wondering if there was something going on between him and admiralsadmin.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall 🔁 liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
i don't need to be reminded of my hopeless crush on shane hollander while scrolling through twitter
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
if i weren't so convinced shane hollander is gay i might just be wondering if there was something going on between him and admiralsadmin.
mac @hockeyfan1992
I feel like we've all had a hopeless crush on Shane Hollander regardless of gender or sexuality. Join the club.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 something you'd like to share with the class?
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
i kinda love boston nobody tell new york🤫🤐
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
my gameday buddy, boston version
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
UGH i wish lawyers had to travel with the team i miss her :((((
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
valid except when she doesn't travel with us she's staying with you, so
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
true. look at her. my BABY😭
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
boston beat us :( everybody boo boston. (this is @shanehollander btw)
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
...accurate
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Happy Pride Night #Admirals🗽 #YouCanPlay
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
(alt) Captain Shane looking GOOD for Pride Night
(is this a styled by @roselandry moment? the people need to know)
rosie ✪ @roselandry
it absolutely is!! @shanehollander i love you so much sunshine boy
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
cap's here❤️
happy pride night @scotthunter 🏳️🌈
#YouCanPlay
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
HOT DAMN
kara @hunter21
shane and scott stunting on everyone who's shocked not me.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
oh hey @luke15hollander
Ryan @admirals1987
Were the shades part of the dress code?
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@roselandry has requested that we show you all the full look so i made him go back outside
rosie ✪ @roselandry
thank you
ava @hollander35
yes thank you @roselandry
3x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
i am absolutely thanking @roselandry
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
Sunday Freddy Hollander is ready for Pride Night.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
(according to @luke15hollander this is serious enough for capital letters and the full government name)
@shanehollander ✪
#YouCanPlay
comments on this post have been disabled
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
#YouCanPlay
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Unfathomably proud of you, Holly
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
Wow, big word @haydpike35 did Jackie teach you that one? Proud of you Hollzy. You're incredible.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
i officially feel deeply stupid for explaining to you and scott how brave gay figure skaters were in sochi. my bad y'all.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@vaughan19 you were being politically conscientious meanwhile Shane and I were going through the nine circles of hell.
ava @hollander35
can't imagine how much strength this took. proud of you in the least parasocial way possible.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
I LOVE YOU
Jackie @jackiepike
So proud of you, babe. Love you forever.
Kara @KaraWagner
@calewagnerNHL and I are so proud of you and SO happy you moved to NY. We love you, Shane!
Camille @cami_st.simon
Go Shane!! Love you so much.
Grace @g.carmichael
so proud of you @shanehollander love from me and Ryan❤️❤️
lily @lilyhollander1221
❤️❤️❤️❤️
kara @hunter21
NEW YORK ADMIRALS. THE GAYEST TEAM IN THE LEAGUE!!! #LOVEWINS #YOUCANPLAY 🏳️🌈🗽❤️
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
YES HOLLZY!! So proud of you, brother.
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
GO HOLLZY!! ❤️❤️
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
i've texted you and called you and told you in person but i'm so proud of you @dutchman.
i'll join you soon.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
i love you and i am so incredibly proud of you my dear dear friend @shanehollander
(the author is well aware that this isn't robbie gk but it lowkey looks like him so deal w it)
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
You two are so cute❤️
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
I don't know what to say that hasn't been said by others or that I haven't told @shanehollander in person, but I am so incredibly proud of my friend and teammate.
alice @hollanov
oomf just came out
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
...what do you mean by that
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY 😉
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov god you're starting to sound like lily
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY you have no way of knowing just how funny that statement was.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we love you @shanehollander #YouCanPlay ❤️
max @holla.nov2481
now is SO not the time but is that or is that not ilya rozanov's hat.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@holla.nov2481 agreed that this is not the time but you are correct.
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
@holla.nov2481 @ROZ81HOLLZY you would be correct, yes.
alice @hollanov
montreal could NEVER!!! we love the admirals and we LOVE shane hollander!!!!
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
they are keeping track of hats now. @amanda.mccall do something.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
genuinely what do you expect me to do you stopped being subtle many moons ago this is out of my hands
tanner ✪ @tanner06dillon
proud of you @shanehollander see you on the ice tonight❤️
alice @hollanov
#gayongaycrime
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we have the best fans 🏳️🌈❤️
*picture of the team out for warmups with the stands visible in the background, full of pride night signs and pride flags*
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
#AdmiralsPrideNight #Admirals🗽 #YouCanPlay
Ottawa Centaurs ✪ @Centaurs
We're looking forward to facing off with the @NYAdmirals for their Pride Night.
Ottawa is more than happy to support our hometown boy @shanehollander. Proud of you and your bravery, Shane.
#YouCanPlay 🏳️🌈
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
@NYAdmirals Captain and Alt Captain @scotthunter and @shanehollander will play NY's Pride Night tonight as the first two openly gay players in the League.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
The Admirals have made statements of support for both players, the NHL has yet to comment on Hollander's coming out.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
Both have received clear support from their teammates and fans alike along with several organizations interested in LGBTQ+ issues
Ottawa Centaurs ✪ @Centaurs
former teammates❤️
*picture of Tanner Dillon standing on Ottawa's side of the line talking to Shane standing on New York's side, they're both grinning*
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we've got some special guests in the locker room tonight
*video of Shane coming into the room and picking up Jade and Ruby*
alice @hollanov
i think i just blacked out this is the cutest thing i've ever seen
vivian @vivpeterson06
AWEEEEE
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
hey @CoachMurdockNHL i think they might be gunning for your job
*video of Jade and Ruby reading the lineup, you can see Jackie and Arthur sitting on Shane's lap in his stall in the background*
ava @hollander35
i know that luke literally *just* went through the process of becoming a hollander but i think they should just all become pikes because i will never be convinced that shane isn't part of that family.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander and I came out to each other pretty much simultaneously and we've been muddling our way through this journey ever since.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I'm so proud of you, Shane. Thank you for showing me that no matter how scary the truth can be, it's still worth it.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Also, everyone enjoy this BTS picture from his shoot with Timid last spring.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I'm also taking this opportunity to share this picture of my favorite people because why the hell not. I love you @kipgrady and (platonically) @shanehollander
kara @hunter21
@scotthunter adding "platonically" didn't do what you think it did.
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
that "platonically" is doing a hell of a lot of work
shayden @haydenhollander
is scott just in the locker room after warmups hiding his phone to tweet about shane while the team gets ready to play??
ava @hollander35
it would appear so😂
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
My kids have never known a day without their Uncle Shane and I wouldn't have it any other way.
I'm so proud of you, bud. Love you always.
*picture of Shane and the Pike kids in front of Shane's stall*
Jackie @jackiepike
I've never known a day as a Pike without Shane, either. I'm so glad you two came as a matching set.
(author spent several hours attempting to photoshop this image to look like Callan Potter and Hudson Williams and gave up because they looked like extra terrestrials so you get the reference instead)
J.J. ✪ @jeanjboiziau
Uncle Shane might be my favorite version of Shane 🥹🥹
J.J. ✪ @jeanjboiziau
I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU JE T'AIME CAPITAINE. JE SUIS TELLEMENT FIER. JE T'AIME.
@shanehollander
Translate from French: I love you Captain. I'm so proud of you. I love you.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Wow do you happen to love Shane? I couldn't quite tell.
Михаил ✪ @mittymiitka
Я очень рад за своего друга. Я горжусь тобой за то, что ты остался верен себе, @shanehollander.
Translate from Russian: I'm very happy for my friend. I'm proud of you for staying true to yourself, @shanehollander.
Chris ✪ @christian.laine
hey @shanehollander you made me feel welcome in this sport when everything was big and new and scary.
Chris ✪ @christian.laine
you were what made everything - the hockey, the strain, and life outside - something i could handle. you made it so everyone could fit all while feeling like you were on the outside.
Chris ✪ @christian.laine
i want hockey to be a place where everyone can fit in, where everyone has a chance to play. i want more people who open the door to anyone who wants to give it a shot.
Chris ✪ @christian.laine
i want more people to be like @shanehollander.
Chris ✪ @christian.laine
i'm so proud of you, hollzy. #YouCanPlay
Colin @colinmoore
Former Voyageurs are coming out of the woodwork good god
mac @hockeyfan1992
Oh no.
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 what?
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore I am genuinely afraid that the person who randomly theorized that Montreal pushed him out because he was gay was correct.
Colin @colinmoore
@hockeyfan1992 oh no.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
#AdmiralsPrideNight #Admirals🗽 #YouCanPlay
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
happy pride night to everyone but specifically SH² #Admirals🗽 #YouCanPlay
kara @hunter21
everyone's favorite not couple ❤️
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
@amanda.mccall making it look like shane and scott are coming out TOGETHER is not what i meant when i said do something!!!
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
you are exhausting.
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
@amanda.mccall 😘😘
NHL ✪ @NHL
The NHL does not make it a practice of commenting on the personal lives of players. That said, we send well wishes to @shanehollander and thank him for all he's done and continues to do for the sport.
ruby @hollanderNYC
nothing ass bare bones statement from the nhl picture me surprised (not)
ruby @hollanderNYC
after the game's already started, too🙄🙄
ava @hollander35 🔁 NHL ✪ @NHL
tweeting this bullshit with this as your icon should qualify as a hate crime.
NHL ✪ @NHL
The NHL does not make it a practice of commenting on the personal lives of players. That said, we send well wishes to @shanehollander and thank him for all he's done and continues to do for the sport.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
@roselandry we think this a real upgrade from that b*ston jersey you've been wearing
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
ADMIRALS WIN!! 🏳️🌈🎉❤️
GAME FINAL | NYC 5 - OTT 1
rosie ✪ @roselandry
my favorite gay boyfriend <3
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I wouldn't have been able to do any of this without you. You changed my life. I love you so much, Rosie.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
baby hollander on postgame press @luke15hollander
(someone start a tally of the number of times he's said he's proud of his brother)
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
and i'll say it a hundred more times!! I'M SO PROUD OF YOU @shanehollander!!
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15hollander I love you SO MUCH, frérot.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you to everyone for the support and thank you especially to my team for loving me for who I am from day one.
I couldn't be prouder to be an Admiral.
ruby @hollanderNYC
'from day one' ????? they've known the WHOLE time???
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Shane told our team first, by the way.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
yeah he beat you by about 30 seconds and then you had us all convinced you were dating each other. fun day.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@vaughan19 okay that was objectively funny. It was also payback for you giving us a joint panic attack in an ice cream shop.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter 🔁 alice @hollanov
So, fun fact, this fight actually happened because he thought I was homophobic.
alice @hollanov
#gayongaycrime
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Arguably the funniest possible outcome.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Just a bewildering experience trying to get him to explain what made him so angry
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
@haydpike35 we had an equally bewildering experience trying to get Scotty to explain what he'd done to make Hollzy so angry
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Wild conclusion, in hindsight.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
we've lost the shirt and tie people
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@shaneshusband #controlit
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
@dutchman who taught you that?
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@shaneshusband Alice. Who do you think??
rosie ✪ @roselandry 🔁 rosie ✪ @roselandry
i told y'all i wanted it on record
rosie ✪ @roselandry
i'd like it on record that i love gay hockey players.
Chapter 53: we've both been very brave
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
April 2018
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
got some interesting mail today @shanehollander
max @holla.nov2481
i'm sorry, does that say HOLLANDER-ROZANOV?
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
Oh you are a dead man walking, Roz
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Insane behavior. Honestly.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Super interesting mail there, Ilya. You are so lucky I love you.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander я тоже тебя люблю❤️❤️
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
you two make me want to quit my job.
ava @hollander35
wtf is happening rn.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
WHAT'S THE PROCEDURE
Ryan @admirals1987
God I wish men could reproduce. Those two would make Hockey Jesus.
Zach @zachariah.zach
Objectively insane thing to say
@shanehollander✪
It took us a long time to get here, but every moment of it was worth it. I couldn't be prouder to be your husband, Ilyusha. I love you always.
comments on this post have been disabled
@ilyarozanov✪
you make me a better person. thank you for loving me, thank you for marrying me. я люблю тебя навсегда.
comments on this post have been disabled
CAA Hockey @CAAHockey
We're lucky enough to represent the Hockey Husbands. Shane and Ilya, we wish you a life full of happiness and many, many Stanley Cups.
CAA Hockey @CAAHockey
@shanehollander and @ilyarozanov sat down earlier this year for a quick interview to speak more about their relationship, check it out below:
www.fakeyoutubelink.com
alice @hollanov
so, back in february when i said oomf came out, i wasn't joking.
thanks for letting me be apart of this, boys. love you dearly.
@shanehollander @ilyarozanov
max @holla.nov2481
i am sick with envy.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
We love you, thanks for helping us with this.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
we are very happy you were a part of this, thank you for never shipping my shane with @haydpike35.
shayden @haydenhollander
i need ... several business days to process this. don't text.
max @holla.nov2481
when you're in a 'gazing lovingly at shane hollander' competition but you're up against ilya rozanov😔😔
max @holla.nov2481
i feel nauseous this is too much for me shane hollander i love you and your love sick puppy eyes.
ruby @hollanderNYC
i feel insane. i wasn't aware people actually looked at others like this in the wild.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
aweee @shanehollander look at you! you look like you have a big crush on me. embarassing.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov I've had a big crush on you for 9 years you should be used to it by now.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
9? NINE??? NINE AS IN ONE MORE THAN 8 ONE LESS THAN 10?? NINE YEARS??
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov I've had a big crush on you for 9 years you should be used to it by now.
ruby @hollanderNYC
well, at least no one can say you underreacted.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
for clarity's sake: i'm bi. shane is super gay, though.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@ilyarozanov please stop
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@shanehollander mmmm no.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
somehow not shocked to find out that the chirping has always been flirting.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
I was just trying to enjoy my breakfast and my roommate decided to break the internet.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
last year i was just trying to enjoy my breakfast and i found your roomate in our kitchen trying and failing to use the keurig. turns out it was unplugged.
Colin @colinmoore
major congrats to rozanov. generational pull.
mac @hockeyfan1992
@colinmoore on both sides.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@hockeyfan1992 again, something you'd like to share with the class?
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
shane: he won the Cup first but i've won more
ilya:
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
hey @ilyarozanov spare some Anya pictures for your brother in law??
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
thank you! you are my favorite in law.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@luke15hollander i am your only in law.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Story time. Like a year and a half ago @jeanjboiziau drunkenly joked that Shane was in love with Rozanov. Turned out the joke was accurate.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Now he regularly eats dinner at our house, helped teach our twins to skate, and our kids call him Uncle Ilya.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander you have gotten me into some strange situations but this might just be the strangest.
Jackie @jackiepike
This is Hayden's way of saying he loves you @ilyarozanov
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
awee i love you too @haydpike35
lily @lilyhollander1221
pretty boy.
lily @lilyhollander1221
i told you all he wasn't sleeping with hayden pike.
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
right, so, this tweet now makes me want to sob even more.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Irina, thank you for my best friend. I hope we're making you proud.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Congrats to @shanehollander's husband on getting his Canadian Residency card!!
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
In all seriousness, we are so happy for @shanehollander and @ilyarozanov. They've fought through a lot to get here and we wish them only happiness from here on out.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Congratulations to our Captain on his marriage, and congratulations to @shanehollander for officially becoming King of the Boston WAGs. We asked the girls, they said the vote was unanimous.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
We are so happy for you, @ilyarozanov and @shanehollander.
Camille @cami_st.simon
Bow down to the new King. We love you @shanehollander
* * *
May 2018
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
my very handsome husband is 27. i now understand @kipgrady.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@ilyarozanov you make me just a little bit violent.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I'm 36 days older than you, Ilya. 36.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Happy Birthday @shanehollander.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Why do you even have this picture.
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
happy birthday @shanehollander you changed my life fr. love you.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@alice_richter ❤️❤️
shane 🔒 @dutchman
We escaped the pits of hell together we are bonded for life 🤞🤞
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
happy birthday shaney i think for your birthday you should get me tickets to the harry styles concert in june, okay? thanks.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@amanda.mccall do you expect me to just slide into his DMs?
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@shanehollander yes. exactly that.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BROTHER. LOVE YOU BIG TIME @shanehollander.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15hollander LOVE YOU TOO, BROTHER.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
happy birthday @shanehollander
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Delete.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
No.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Ugh. Fine.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Happy birthday, Rook.
@shanehollander
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
what the fuck is happening here you two are so odd
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@kipgrady I'm at least 85% sure you took this picture
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@shanehollander is this from after Pride Night?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@kipgrady yes
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
@shanehollander well, that explains it. never let me try to match your rookies shot for shot again.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@kipgrady yes, sir 🫡🫡
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
kara @hunter21
if anyone thought both of them being in public relationships would make shane and scott any more normal, they were very very wrong.
@ilyarozanov✪
happy birthday, котик. i love you.
@shanehollander✪ I love you too, thank you❤️
see 1,272 other comments...
max @holla.nov2481
ilya rozanov you are insane.
kara @hunter21
this one is crazy. hey @ilyarozanov is this you literally marking your territory?? asking for a friend.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
happy birthday @shanehollander i love you big time forever and always.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Love you forever and always, Rosie.
Yuna @YunaHollander
Happy 27th Birthday, @shanehollander. I love you to the moon and back.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you, mom. I love you too ❤️
* * *
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
see you tonight @NYAdmirals
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
it's kind of like a family reunion, if you think about it
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
@NYAdmirals huh ... you're right
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
HOLLANDER-ROZANOV FAMILY REUNION TONIGHT @ MSG. TUNE IN.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game One Final | NYC 4 - BOS 2
kara @hunter21
reporters ask hollanov about hockey challenge: failed spectacularly.
max @holla.nov2481
right?? this is getting exhausting. they're both playing SO well and all anyone is talking about is their relationship
max @holla.nov2481
which, don't get me wrong, i CLEARLY want to hear about it but, you know, maybe not in a post game interview
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Game Two Final | BOS 3 - NYC 2
max @holla.nov2481
oh and now they've both been pulled from media. thank god. give those poor boys a break.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game Three Final | NYC 3 - BOS 1
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Game Four Final | BOS 1 - NYC 0
* * *
@shanehollander✪
С годовщиной, Илюша. Я люблю тебя больше всего на свете. Я выбирала бы тебя в каждой жизни.
Translate from Russian: Happy anniversary, Ilyusha. I love you more than anything in the world. I would choose you in every lifetime.
@ilyarozanov✪ i love you.
see 2,014 more comments...
@ilyarozanov✪
one year of being married to my favorite person. i love you to the ends of the earth.
@shanehollander✪ Forever, Ilya.
See 2,231 more comments...
alice @hollanov
happy anniversary to the day i figured them out. less importantly, happy wedding anniversary @shanehollander @ilyarozanov.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
did those two psychos seriously get married during the playoffs?? like i know they said in that interview that they'd been married since may but it JUST hit me that all of may is PLAYOFF HOCKEY
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
CRAZY PEOPLE. THE BOTH OF YOU.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
happy anniversary to the day @shanehollander and @scotthunter got in a minor screaming match about the insanity of their relationships and then we all fell asleep in the same bed.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
also happy wedding anniversary to @shanehollander and @ilyarozanov, i guess.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Minor being the key word. We lost steam pretty quickly when we realized we were both crazy.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander was wearing @ilyarozanov's sweatshirt in that picture that got posted of the three of us asleep in Shane's hotel bed. Just in case anyone was wondering.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Hello, I am in search of teammates who won't air my dirty laundry on their public Twitter accounts. Serious inquiries only, please.
* * *
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Game Five Final | BOS 2- NYC 1
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game Six Final | NYC 3 - BOS 1
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
LUCA HAAS WITH THE BUZZER BEATER
GAME SEVEN FINAL | BOS 3 - NYC 2
SEE YOU IN THE FINALS.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Game Seven Final | NYC 2 - BOS 3
Good game, @NHLBears.
Incredible season, boys.
#Admirals🗽
Notes:
i referenced some of the more negative reactions in the main fic but didn't want to include them here because writing the realistic negative responses was making me unnecessarily sad. i want this work to be the happy, bigot-free section of the internet.
Chapter 54: but i'll believe in anything
Chapter Text
rosie ✪ @roselandry
Long Live the King of the WAGs
alice @hollanov
hollzy in a wag jacket 😭😭😭
Grace @g.carmichael
our king is so pretty i love you @shanehollander
Jackie @jackiepike
five bucks to the first person who can guess what he's looking at
shayden @haydenhollander
pictures of Sunny?
max @holla.nov2481
pictures of ilya??
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
His texts with @scotthunter
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
game tape.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
i know shane hollander better than ANY OF YOU PEOPLE
rosie ✪ @roselandry
alright calm down no one's trying to steal him
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@roselandry they better not
kara @hunter21
starting to think the admirals are just a giant homoerotic polycule.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
oh no we've been found out
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@vaughan19 you're in social media jail. Turn the phone off before Christina sends Amanda to your apartment.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
this is what happens when you try to speak the truth. the powers that be silence you. #truthbomb
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
i don't even know where to start.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
ignoring carter vaughan for a second ... @shanehollander can we see the full jacket??
Camille @cami_st.simon
he's disappeared somewhere and i can't find him so hopefully the mockup will do
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@cami_st.simon thank you queen i love you.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I'm cheering for the @NHLBears and I'm happy about it.
No one tell 18-year-old Shane, he'd probably pass out.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I feel like a lot of what's happening in your life would cause 18-year-old Shane to pass out.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter fair.
Jackie @jackiepike
your godson is in a rozanov jersey right now. that alone would send 18-year-old shane into a coma.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Jackie @jackiepike
RIP hayden pike.
Jackie @jackiepike
your godson is in a rozanov jersey right now. that alone would send 18-year-old shane into a coma.
* * *
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
good morning ☀️
Luca ✪ @haas72official
she just brought me your socks???
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
we're practicing good dental hygiene in the guest bathroom.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@luke15hollander whose toothbrush is that.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
@ilyarozanov definitely not yours.
kara @hunter21
the whole hollanov family have turned their public accounts into sunny hollander fan pages but i must ask the real question: where is anya?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@hunter21 Ilya put her in a shirt because "she needs clothes, Hollander! She gets cold!"
kara @hunter21
@shanehollander does your husband seriously call you Hollander off the ice.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@hunter21 depends on how much I've pissed him off, to be totally honest.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
shane hollander's active social media era must never die. this has been the best year of my life.
* * *
Lisa @dr.lisahayes
good luck today @wyatthayes 💛💛
Colin @colinmoore
are hockey players getting hotter or am i only just now noticing.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
a little of both, if i had to guess
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
sunny is ready for game six!!
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
This is just excessive.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
@shanehollander she's cheering for her papa!
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@luke15hollander he's corrupting you.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
YOUR BOSTON BEARS ARE THE 2018 STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
Cup # 2 for Captain Ilya Rozanov
alice @hollanov
hollanov one-upping the skip kiss when.
alice @hollanov
NOW. HOLLANOV ONE-UPPING THE SKIP KISS NOW.
alice @hollanov
LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOO. i hope the mere sight of this causes the commissioner to disappear into a fine mist.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
kiss him harder roz i'm not sure you've killed the homophobic commissioner with your gay joy quite yet
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
sorry *gay and bisexual joy.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
we are so proud of you, boys.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I am so incredibly proud of you @ilyarozanov. You amaze me every day.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
This is cute. Hate that it's about Rozanov.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@scotthunter keep lying to yourself, grandpa.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you boston, thank you @NHLBears, thank you @shanehollander. apologies in advance to the entire city of las vegas. let's party.
* * *
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
happy birthday to this tiny boston fan who never changed loyalties @luke15hollander
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
i play for new york, not sure if you've heard... maybe your memory's getting spotty in your old age
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
happy birthday to hollzy no. 2 @luke15hollander.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
@shanehollander one of us is gonna need a new nickname
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
happy birthday hollzy. come back from boston soon. i miss your brother's dog.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
here, damn.
Drew @drewmcclean
happy birthday to @luke15hollander, my oldest friend, my favorite person.
love you even when you bring your hockey god older brother to my games without warning.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
i should do that again, that was fun.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Happy birthday @luke15hollander I like how you live with @shanehollander yet you somehow always end up in my house.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Crazy because I could've sworn @conor71mclaughlin lived with you yet he's somehow always at *my* house.
ruby @hollanderNYC
the admirals have stopped shipping shott on main and have started shipping gillmac ... hollmac?? what're we calling these two now
kara @hunter21
idk we'll figure it out later
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Happy birthday, little brother. Love you @luke15hollander.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
love you tons, holly ❤️❤️
Mac ✪ @conor71mclaughlin
happy birthday @luke15hollander
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
thanks, man! i appreciate it!!
shane 🔒 @dutchman
smooth @fishhavegills
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
shut the fuck up.
Red Bull ✪ @redbull
happy birthday to our newest athlete @luke15hollander
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
honored to be apart of the @redbull team
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
LOOKIN GOOD BABY HOLLZY!!!
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
Yes because what you need is MORE energy. Pray for us.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Proud of you!!
Yuna @YunaHollander
Happy 21st birthday to my youngest son. We love you so much @luke15hollander.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
love you too, mom❤️
* * *
@shanehollander✪
Happy birthday, @ilyarozanov. You are my everything, I love you to the moon and back.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Happy birthday, Ilyusha. I love you.
alice @hollanov
who is this absolute SOFTIE and what did he do with ilya rozanov??
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
you are ruining my reputation, hollander.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
he looks like a little puppy dog i love him so much
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@vaughan19 stop talking
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@ilyarozanov ugh fine
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
loverboy roz 🥹🥹🥹
max @holla.nov2481
i love these little freaks with my whole soul.
svetlana @svetrova
с днем рождения, Илюша♥︎♥︎♥︎
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
love you, sveta
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
happy birthday to my brother in law.
i'd say favorite but that would be a lie.
he is mean to me. i do not like him.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
why.
ruby @hollanderNYC
what are luke and ilya fighting about. i can nearly guarantee it's something stupid.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
@hollanderNYC Luke lost a bet and is only allowed to play as a team he does not like when they play Chel for the remainder of the month.
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Luca ✪ @haas72official
the child is being forced to play as the voyageurs isn't he.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
@hollanderNYC Luke lost a bet and is only allowed to play as a team he does not like when they play Chel for the remainder of the month.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
how am i meant to move forward from this.
ruby @hollanderNYC
this picture made me believe in love again.
Yuna @YunaHollander
Happy 27th birthday to my favorite son in law. We love you so much, Ilyushenka 🤍🤍
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
you are my favorite mother in law. love you🤍
New York Magazine ✪ @NYMag
today seems like as good a day as any to drop this interview.
happy birthday to 1/2 of the Hockey Husbands.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
holy shit they're hot
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
oh my god you can pry this picture out of my cold, dead hands.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
happy birthday roomie
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
you are my favorite child. your brother is annoying me.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
@ilyarozanov i'll take it.
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
happy birthday @ilyarozanov
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
check out the interview our beautiful founders did earlier this year
www.imsickofcomingupwithurls.com
alice @hollanov
prettiest couple alive
alice @hollanov
happy birthday bestie @lilyhollander1221
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
crazy that she shares a birthday with rozanov
alice @hollanov
@ROZ81HOLLZY what an insane coincidence, right??
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Happy birthday to my best friend's husband who I tolerate on occasion.
You're getting old, @ilyarozanov
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
i do not think you are allowed to call people old, adam.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@ilyarozanov my name's not Adam??
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
@scotthunter are you sure? i could have sworn you were there for the beginning of humanity.
Chapter 55: step into the daylight (the epilogue)
Chapter Text
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
About to test a theory.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I love you dearly but you are a constant threat to my blood pressure.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
We want to congratulate @bennettofficial on his announcement(s)
We are so thankful for the years you've dedicated to our organization. We'll miss you on the ice & in the locker room.
Love you forever, Benny #Admirals🗽 #YouCanPlay
kara @hunter21
is this seriously the shirt eric bennett is wearing right now.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial 🔁 kara @hunter21
Shirt courtesy of @ilyarozanov
Emotional support courtesy of @shanehollander and @scotthunter
kara @hunter21
is this seriously the shirt eric bennett is wearing right now.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
it's a great shirt.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
There's not much to say that I haven't told @bennettofficial in person, but I'm so proud of you, Benny. You're incredible. I hope you know you're never getting rid of me, even if you retire and leave us behind.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
@NYAdmirals Goalie @benettofficial has become the fourth active player to come out, the third from New York alone.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
This announcement was made at the same time he announced his retirement after 20 years with the Admirals.
NHL Updates ✪ @NHLUpdates
The Admirals have already posted in support, the NHL has yet to comment.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Congrats on your retirement, Benny. We're gonna miss you.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Don't worry, I know the code to your gate and your front door. Also, no comment on me being bi?? Are you homophobic, Hollzy?
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Changing the codes as we speak.
brett @brettnash
i sometimes forget how hot eric bennett is when he's always hidden behind 200 pounds of goalie pads.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
congrats benny❤️
ruby @hollanderNYC
the admirals getting gayer by the day might at least eventually lead to an explanation on these two freaks
kara @hunter21
feels like wishful thinking tbh
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills 🔁 ruby @hollanderNYC
sigh.
ruby @hollanderNYC
the admirals getting gayer by the day might at least eventually lead to an explanation on these two freaks
shane 🔒 @dutchman
You two make my head hurt.
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
Heading out for Game Six v. @mnnomads tomorrow
* * *
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
GAME SIX. TONIGHT. THE CUP IS IN THE BUILDING. TUNE IN.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i don't know about you, but @luke15hollander's feeling 22
happy birthday, Luke! we love you!
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
oh my god amanda i'm going to fucking KILL YOU
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
thank you @NYAdmirals!! i love you too!
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
now hold on one goddamn minute... these pictures look familiar...
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
i don't know about you, but @luke15hollander's feeling 22
happy birthday, Luke! we love you!
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
oh my god.
alice @hollanov
how the hell did you find those that fast
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@hollanov i'm unemployed and in need of a new hobby.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills 🔁 liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
@amanda.mccall you're dead you're dead you're dead you're dead
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
oh my god.
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@amanda.mccall i'm telling shane to revoke sunny privileges i'm telling christina who really broke that camera i'm finding your mother's phone number and telling her you lied about having to work on thanksgiving just because you didn't want to eat dry turkey
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@amanda.mccall SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
@fishhavegills 😘😘
Yuna @YunaHollander
Happy birthday @luke15hollander ❤️❤️ I'm so proud of you and I love you dearly.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
thanks for dinner last night Mama Hollander!! we love you!!
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
thank you, mom❤️❤️ love you so much!!
Mac ✪ @conor71mclaughlin
thank you again for dinner, Mrs. Hollander!!
gen @genevieve1998
it's like they're using muller as a shield
vivian @vivpeterson06
that feels accurate
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
good luck tonight @shanehollander
i love you )))
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Love you ❤️
max @holla.nov2481
i'm never going to shut up about this oh my god
shayden @haydenhollander
i just know ilya had to be overly involved in the design of those jackets because shane has an itemized list of superstitions
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we love our HABs ❤️❤️
alice @hollanov 🔁 Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
being stupidly hot is apparently a prerequisite to date one of the (several) queer admirals
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
we love our HABs ❤️❤️
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the nomads scored first.
P1 18:03 | NYC 0 - MIN 1
max @holla.nov2481
do you think using smelling salts is an activity that *requires* luke to put his entire hand in conor's face?
ruby @hollanderNYC
no.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
AND THAT'S A POWERPLAY GOAL FOR CARTER VAUGHAN (ty for the assist scotty)
P2 07:15 | NYC 1 - MIN 1
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
tied 1-1 with one minute left on the clock.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
what's that i see?? the hollander brothers scoring again??
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
HOLLANDER TO HOLLANDER FOR THE GAME.
GOAL SHANE HOLLANDER. ASSIST LUKE HOLLANDER.
P3 00:05 | NYC 2 - MIN 1
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
YOUR NEW YORK ADMIRALS ARE STANLEY CUP CHAMPIONS.
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals 🔁 Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
the first hollander-hollander connection:
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
got an assist from my big brother in overtime ❤️
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
the most recent:
Admirals ✪ @NYAdmirals
(DJ Khaled Voice) another one.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Happy birthday @luke15hollander
Thanks for the assist, love you ❤️❤️
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
love you ❤️❤️
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
One for the road.
Thank you, New York.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Oh, also, theory proven @shanehollander @scotthunter
Luca ✪ @haas72official
happy birthday @luke15hollander.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
also, congrats on the Cup ... i guess
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
touching tribute, Luca. i'm in tears.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
someone tell us where we're supposed to celebrate in minneapolis. we just won the stanley cup and it's @luke15hollander's 22nd birthday.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
and please don't tell me i'm technically in saint paul. i do not care.
Mac ✪ @conor71mclaughlin 🔁 max @holla.nov2481
this is the only way to do it.
happy birthday, by the way @luke15hollander
max @holla.nov2481
do you think using smelling salts is an activity that *requires* luke to put his entire hand in conor's face?
vivian @vivpeterson06
did that child just win his first stanley cup, immediately log on to twitter, and then use a hollanov account tweeting about him and baby hollander to wish luke a happy birthday?
gen @genevieve1998
yeah, it would appear so.
4x STANLEY CUP CHAMP SHANE MF HOLLANDER @shollander24
had to update my name again 🙄🙄
ali @alison_ford
99% sure i just saw shane hollander and the admirals stumbling out of a tattoo parlor. it is 2:00 in the morning.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
goodnight @shanehollander
nyc wags & habs
Day after Game Six: 2:30 am
Mary Huff
Guys.
Kara Wagner
What do you MEAN he lost Cale?? They were attached at the hip all night?
Martine Brisebois
Yeah I don't think your missing husband is what she's reacting to
I thought Shane and Luke shared hotels?? Since when do Luke and Conor?? I'm starting to believe the Twitter girlies...
Gloria Grey
I think Shane's been with Carter for the playoffs but they've been with the two new rookies for most of the season because New York does the veteran/rookie rooming thing and Scott claimed Luke had aged out of that and then claimed seniority and assigned those two to the rookies so he could have his own room
Laurel Kelley (nick muller girlfriend)
Nick and Cameron are with Farmer and Woody right now, I have no clue what's going on with Luke and Conor though.
Kip Grady
Wait who took that picture if everyone else is asleep or missing?
Ilya
probably amanda
luke is literally my brother in law and even i don't know what's going on with luke and conor
shane doesn't either. i have asked. many times.
Mary Huff
Conor lives in our house and I have no idea whats going on either.
Though I'm honestly not sure if he even lives there anymore sometimes given the amount of time he spends at the Hollanders!!!
I want answers.
Kara Wagner
They're 22 and 21 year old boys. You're never getting answers.
Ilya
you have to wait until they are 25 and their brains are developed
or until they're 25 and one of them proposes marriage while concussed after being in a situationship for 8 years
Kip Grady
The fact that you two are happily married astounds me.
Your strategies (if they can even be called that) would work for literally no one else in the entire world.
Ilya
you might have a point.
* * *
Day after Game Six: 12:30 pm
Mary Huff
It's been an eventful 12 hours.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
One brother's asleep with the Cup, the other's asleep on the bathroom floor. You can guess who's who.
ava @hollander35
shane's not letting go of that Cup for ANYTHING😂😂
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
WE RALLY
Luca ✪ @haas72official 🔁 Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
by this he means they're all asleep in shane's house.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
WE RALLY
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller 🔁 Luca ✪ @haas72official
NO! WE ARE RALLYING! (mob roz ordered us all food and then told us to get out of his house)
Luca ✪ @haas72official 🔁 Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
by this he means they're all asleep in shane's house.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
now he's buying us drinks. we love mob roz.
alice @hollanov
all of you are going to die. i am afraid.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
these grown ass men are my babies and i love them.
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
you get one single drink in me and all the sudden im crying real tears about my bestie shane
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
did shane happen to misplace his shirt??
brett @brettnash
i'm where you ask?? the kingfisher. again.
brett @brettnash
you know who else is here?? all of the admirals. i don't think they've been to another bar in this entire city in the past three years.
brett @brettnash
i'm also fairly certain that r*ger crowell would expire if he saw the state of this team rn.
brett @brettnash
just fuckin gay as shit up in here
* * *
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Happy to be back with @CCMHockey
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
hot.
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
@ilyarozanov gross bro
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you to @CCMHockey for the sponsorship and also the husband, kind of.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Please stop talking.
kara @hunter21
uh ... hello??
max @holla.nov2481
is that who i think it is.
kara @hunter21
@holla.nov2481 yes.
max @holla.nov2481
@hunter21 of course it is
CCM Hockey @CCMHockey
In celebration of Pride month, we teamed up with @shanehollander and @ilyarozanov.
Hockey is for Everyone #YouCanPlay
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
happy pride. these two are booked and gd BUSY. i'm already exhausted and it's only monday.
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
also, no i am not THEIR pr rep. i could fully leave at any point. i am being held hostage in a cage of my own creation.
CCM Hockey @CCMHockey
The BTS with these two has gotten a little friendlier over the past 9 years.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
that's not necessarily truethis tweet has been deleted
Yuna @YunaHollander
❤️ @shanehollander @ilyarozanov @CCMHockey
amanda 🔒 @amanda.mccall
please put on pants @ilyarozanov.
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
no.
* * *
Late Night with Seth Meyers ✪ @LateNightSeth
@ilyarozanov tonight.
kara @hunter21
what the hell is the guy from boston doing on seth meyers for pride month.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
He was objectively the most entertaining choice. Do you want to hear @shanehollander list every Cup-winning team in order, @scotthunter going on about true crime, or @bennettofficial talking about home renovations? Because those were the other options.
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Hey, my home renovations are super interesting. Shane says so.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
@bennettofficial are you hearing yourself, man?
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
thank you for having me @sethmeyers @LateNightSeth
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
Looking good Mob Roz 💪💪
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
cute @ilyarozanov.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
@ilyarozanov I know you're blushing, Roz. Don't even try to deny it.
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Shane ✪ @shanehollander
it really says something that their flirting has become so commonplace that people hardly even react anymore. two years ago this single word would've caused mass hysteria.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
cute @ilyarozanov.
* * *
Cosmopolitan ✪ @Cosmopolitan
In celebration of Pride month we brought @ilyarozanov and @shanehollander in for a round of Cosmo Goes Deep
max @holla.nov2481
ilya saying the most canadian thing about shane is that he cannot take a compliment and shane just pouting is killing me these two are so funny
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
shane deadpan delivering that rose landry is his celebrity crush and ilya just utterly incapable of keeping it together😂
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
the smiling face of a man lying through his teeth
* * *
Teen Vogue ✪ @TeenVogue
@shanehollander and @ilyarozanov joined us for a little compliment battle in celebration of Pride month
alice @hollanov
shane: no smiling, shane literally five seconds later: 😍🤩🥰🥹
☘️☘️ @princessshane
i like how they're required to have at least seven points of contact at literally all times.
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81
@ilyarozanov what is your problem
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
still, a full year later, entirely unable to fathom that notorious fuck boy ilya rozanov is THIS down bad. bro.
Colin @colinmoore
it's shane fucking hollander. how the hell else is a person meant to look at him?
max @holla.nov2481
i love when shane gets a little funny with it this man's sense of humor is severely underrated
ruby @hollanderNYC
hey @scotthunter question: is this what your nightmares look like?
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Yeah, that's pretty accurate actually.
* * *
BuzzFeed ✪ @BuzzFeed
@shanehollander's back and this time he brought his husband
kara @hunter21
please tell me we're not making this man suffer through thirst tweets again he barely survived the first time
kara @hunter21
oh dear lord.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY
hey @ilyarozanov #CONTROLIT please good god
* * *
VANITY FAIR ✪ @VanityFair
ruby @hollanderNYC
yeah, that checks out.
alice @hollanov
i love these cuties with all my heart.
* * *
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
Feeling right at home.
@scotthunter @shanehollander @ilyarozanov
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Thanks for having us @NYCPride!!
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Sunny loves @NYCPride 🏳️🌈❤️
* * *
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
Happy Pride @UnderArmour
kip 🔒 @kipgrady
hot.
kara @hunter21
I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT MEN DID TO DESERVE ALL THAT. THE UNIVERSE IS UNFAIR.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
YEAH CAP 🔥🔥
breezy ✪ @brisebois38
SCOTT IS HOT. SCOTT IS HOT. SCOTT IS HOT.
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
SCOTTY 🥵🥵
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Happy Pride @Reebok
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
HOLLY BABY 🔥🔥🥵🥵
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
shane this is too hot for the masses you're going to kill people this is a threat to the public🥵🥵🥵
lily @lilyhollander1221
DELETE THIS. I'VE SEEN IT. YOU CAN DELETE IT NOW. EVERYONE STOP LOOKING.
Nicky ✪ @nick29muller
NO! don't listen to @lilyhollander1221!!! the public deserves to see your biceps.
cam ✪ @CameronMcCormick
@nick29muller your obsession with hollzy's biceps needs to be studied.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
I feel like I just got one-upped
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
mine.
alice @hollanov
shane and scott inciting a mass psychosis event via pride merch ... just another wednesday in nyc
* * *
Reebok ✪ @Reebok
@shanehollander for Pride month
#HockeyIsForEveryone #YouCanPlay #Pride🏳️🌈
Grace @g.carmichael
SHANE HOLLANDER HOLY SHIT 🔥😍
Camille @cami_st.simon
WOW @shanehollander
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
Thank you to @Reebok for celebrating Pride and inclusivity in sports.
I had so much fun with this campaign.
#YouCanPlay #Pride🏳️🌈
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
Does Reebok even sell swimwear or did you just ask to be shirtless and wet?
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
@haydpike35 have some decorum. please. i'm begging here.
Luca ✪ @haas72official
i live in fear of whatever He is about to tweet.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
hot. very hot. 10/10.
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Reebok ✪ @Reebok
@shanehollander come home right now.
Reebok ✪ @Reebok
@shanehollander for Pride month
#HockeyIsForEveryone #YouCanPlay #Pride🏳️🌈
Colin @colinmoore 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
is it just me or is 'lily' oddly similar to 'ilya'
lily @lilyhollander1221 🔁 Reebok ✪ @Reebok
@shanehollander come home right now.
alice @hollanov
not just you.
shayden @haydenhollander 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
you know ... if lily is ilya ... a lot of things would start to make a lot more sense starting with this:
lily @lilyhollander1221
wrong. have none of you people seen this photo? i want to bite him.
Reebok ✪ @Reebok
@shanehollander for Pride month
#HockeyIsForEveryone #YouCanPlay #Pride🏳️🌈
lily @lilyhollander1221
DELETE DELETE DELETE NO ONE LOOK AT HIM
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@Reebok #YouCanPlay #Pride🏳️🌈
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
i think i just passed out
lily @lilyhollander1221
you look very biteable here. come home now please i am losing my mind.
alice @hollanov
didn't even realize reebok sold swimwear until this very moment
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
NOT YOU TOO. DELETE!!
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
@ilyarozanov WRONG ACCOUNT
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@fishhavegills no one would've noticed if you hadn't said anything 😂😂
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@dutchman oops
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
@fishhavegills you don't sound very apologetic
luke 🔒 @fishhavegills
@shaneshusband it was gonna happen sooner or later. maybe you should have fewer accounts.
Илья 🔒 @shaneshusband
@fishhavegills fair enough
ruby @hollanderNYC 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
you know what, a lot of things are starting to make sense
lily @lilyhollander1221
@hollanderMTL a. change your username, b. you might be right (so long as you don't suggest shane is in any way romantically involved!!!!!!!☠️🔪)
katie @katherineholt97 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
using a secret stan account you have for your husband to threaten your husband's former team is such an Ilya Rozanov (tm) thing to do i don't know how to explain it
lily @lilyhollander1221
@VoyageursMTL you will not be smiling for long.
🌼🌼🌼 @BOS81 🔁 Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears
guys they were quote tweeting their own captain.
Boston Bears ✪ @NHLBears 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
hate to see hollander fans being correct. but we've gotta admit that this one got it right just this once.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
loverboy roz at it again
lily @lilyhollander1221
he's always been so pretty🥹😍🤩 montreal you did not deserve him.
shayden @haydenhollander 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
this was literally his first tweet. i'm in tears @haydpike35 what did you do to this man.
lily @lilyhollander1221
oh so you like being wrong? i see now why you are fan of pike.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@haydenhollander I got shipped with the man he refused to admit he was in love with for about seven years and he hadn't yet learned how to express emotions
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35 accurate. Also, you're a shit disturber so that might've had something to do with it.
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander I couldn't possibly know what you're talking about.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@haydpike35
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@shanehollander I probably should've known you'd have receipts...
shayden @haydenhollander 🔁 Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
he was given permission to rage bait and then got on here and called shane cute
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
I think we, as a society, need to be talking more about this picture.
max @holla.nov2481
well, this exchange is even funnier now
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
LOVERBOY ROZ 😭😭😭
lily @lilyhollander1221
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 lily @lilyhollander1221
right. i think i'm gonna go cry now.
lily @lilyhollander1221
@shanehollander i love you.
liv @ROZ81HOLLZY 🔁 alice @hollanov
YOU KNEW @hollanov!!!
alice @hollanov
happy birthday bestie @lilyhollander1221
alice @hollanov
i've known since May 18, 2017. just by the way.
shane 🔒 @dutchman
@hollanov you had an inside source it doesn't count
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
@dutchman it so counts
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
oops. anyways. this one's my favorite. now everyone stop looking at my husband.
Cliff ✪ @marlowofficial
Oh there's no fucking way.
Huff ✪ @greghuffhockey
YOU'RE JOKING
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
@greghuffhockey you found him during my FIRST game in New York.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@greghuffhockey @shanehollander had to scroll to find this one
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
@scotthunter what the hell is your contact picture for Hollzy?
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@bennettofficial
Eric ✪ @bennettofficial
@scotthunter God you two are strange.
* * *
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
Day One of our Ottawa Camps with @luke15hollander
* * *
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
The 'Hollanov Twins' (as they insist we call them) have finally been reunited @luke15hollander @haas72official
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
Final day of our Ottawa Day Camps with @haas72official
* * *
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
The coaches are arriving for our inaugural Irina Foundation Development Camp, we're excited for the week to come!
Bood ✪ @zaneboodramofficial
Day one of @irinafoundation dev. camp! Thanks for inviting me to coach @shanehollander @ilyarozanov
📍 Ontario, Canada
Meg @keeper_meghan
thanks for inviting me, too @irinafoundation!! so excited for this week!
Vaughny ✪ @vaughan19
coach hollander is ready for @irinafoundation development camp!
Troy ✪ @troybarrettNHL
Coach Hollander is asleep.
* * *
Luke ✪ @luke15hollander
HOLLANOV TWINS @haas72official
max @holla.nov2481
confirmation that luke and luca = hollanov sons straight from the source this is a great day
Ilya ✪ @ilyarozanov
the hollanov twins have switched sports, apparently.
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
I just reminded them they both won Rookie of the Year and they've decided they're coming back to hockey.
Scott ✪ @scotthunter
@shanehollander thank God.
Yuna @YunaHollander
My granddaughter is quite taken with the lake. She keeps trying to swim away.
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
kara @hunter21
even the Irina Foundation ships HollMac.
ruby @hollanderNYC
@hunter21 that's the name we're going with?
kara @hunter21
@hollanderNYC sure why not
Hayden ✪ @haydpike35
@ilyarozanov convinced @shanehollander to eat pizza that has fewer than three different vegetables on it. This might just be the most impressive thing he's ever done.
The Irina Foundation @irinafoundation
Coach Rozanova and Coach Hollander got their own room. The campers have also unanimously voted them as the favorite coaches.
Yuna @YunaHollander
My other granddaughter prefers staying on land. She's much easier to keep track of.
* * *
Yuna @YunaHollander
My girls are ready for a very special day ❤️
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 Yuna @YunaHollander
HOLLANOV WEDDING????
Yuna @YunaHollander
My girls are ready for a very special day ❤️
rosie ✪ @roselandry
my best friend's getting married (again) ❤️
max @holla.nov2481 🔁 rosie ✪ @roselandry
OH MY GOD HOLLANOV WEDDING.
rosie ✪ @roselandry
my best friend's getting married (again) ❤️
svetlana @svetrova
my best friend is getting married today♥︎ (again)
alice 🔒 @alice_richter
during the last hollanov wedding i was having a mental breakdown on my stan account. this time i'm a guest. what is my life.
@ilyarozanov✪
lucky enough to marry my favorite person twice. i love you @shanehollander.
@shanehollander✪
You're the love of my life @ilyarozanov. Я тебя люблю.
alice @hollanov
i love them i love them i love them i love them.
alice @hollanov
placed this brick in 2010 and here we are. i love u, hollanov.
* * *
Shane ✪ @shanehollander
My favorite person, my favorite place. I love you to the moon and back @ilyarozanov. Forever.
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