Chapter Text
Peace is not meant to last. You can't tame a wild beast. Or maybe you can, but not without pain. Not without suffering or failiture of any kind.
So why would anyone stay?
Hope, perhaps. Hope is maybe the right word. Maybe yes, maybe not.
Or people just have this much faith sometimes. No matter.
When you heal a beast, you can't expect not to come out without a few scrapes of your own.
And if you want to survive, you have to live first.
It was late evening.
The sun has already dissapeared behind the horizon, leaving flickering streetlights to light up the streets and cold, night air to force anyone back into the warmth of their home.
Shadow Milk and Pure Vanilla were sitting on a small meadow, surrounded by silvery white flowers - moonflowers.
The cool breeze was ruffling their hair, telling them they should go inside.
But talking the conversation they were having was more important right now.
They were talking about possible solutions to the problem with their Souljams.
As infuriating it was to admit, the knowledge Shadow Milk possesed wasn't of much help. And his knowledge, especially about magic was incredibly large. But, no matter how much he tried, he couldn't recall a lot of information about what was happening to him. He knew a lot about soul bonds, binding spells and reversing rituals.
Yet, none of it seemed exacly similiar to their situation. Their Souljams were silent - something that was once comforting to him, but brought only the feeling of unease as of now.
The gems also physically hurt to be separated, which was another thing he never heard before when it came to bonds of any kind.
From what he recalled, soul binding never hurt physically. Emotionally? Yes. But physically? It shouldn't.
It was also very obviously connected to the blue gems placed upon their chests. It confused him greatly.
They never behaved like this before - not when he was still imprisoned, not in the spire and not even when he tortured his other half.
Pure Vanilla also wasn't exacly sure what was happening. His knowledge about magic was mainly focused on healing, what he was taught in the Blueberry Joghurt Academy and what little he knew about sealing spells.
Finding an answer was going to be a long process - that much they were sure about.
But even with all their problems, some small part of them liked this. Not the whole pain situation, definitely not, but eachothe's company. Even if as temporary allies, even because of forced proximity, but they still did.
Pure Vanilla looked at Shadow Milk. Really looked.
He noticed how the other would start gesturing wildly when lost in thought, or how he would avoid his gaze whenever he showed him sincerity.
Maybe, just maybe, they could grow closer?
But alas, helping a monster get better is not that easy.
The sun was rising and the birds were singing.
As usual, they were both in the library, looking through it's resources.
Looking through every single scrap if paper talking about magic was definitely going to take them a long, long time.
Even if not alone, it would take months, maybe even over a year to look through it all. And there was no guarantee they would find what they were looking for.
Yes, they did have an eternity to solve this, but they did not want to spend an eternity like this.
Pure Vanilla was nervous.
There was an insistant though lingering in his mind, that has been there for quite some time. Maybe if he voiced it, he would ruin everything, or maybe it will make things easier?
He took a deep breath.
Nontherless, it was worth the risk.
Shadow Milk was flipping through a book with one hand, dragging his sharp nails over the table with the other one.
Suddenly, he froze. He could feel another hand being placed on top of his own, preventing him from damaging the wooden surface further.
His gaze snapped up, fixed on the one before him.
Pure Vanilla was looking at him. There was nervousness written all over his face.
"Shadow Milk" he said, his voice suprisingly steady.
"I've been... I've been thinking a lot lately. About this whole situation and..."
He trailed off, seemingly lost in thought.
"And what will we do after this issue is solved. I just wanted to say, that you're welcome to stay, even when all of this is over"
Shadow Milk's eyes widened and the jam in his veins turned to ice.
No... no, it can't be.
He was dreading the saint's next words, looking everywhere but him.
"I would like us to become friends, even when we no longer have to remain together. I would like to get to know you better"
Know him. Manic laughter was threatening to spill out of him.
The ice in his veins shattered, beginning to boil.
He slapped Pure Vanilla's hand away, floating up to hower above him.
"CURSE YOU!" he spat out, voice dripping with venom.
"You know NOTHING. You are NOTHING. I know what game you're playing. Trying to earn my trust, to what? Seal me away with the help of that half-withered friend of yours once this whole mess is over? You don't know ANYTHING. You pretend to understand me, but even after all I've put you through, yous still cling to that delusion"
"Shadow Milk-" he started, but was promptly cut off.
"Oh please. Lying to the Master of Deceit, are you? Nice try, Nills. But you gotta try a lottle harder than that"
He was circling around Pure Vanilla, as shadows started swallowing every last bit of light in the library. The large, glass windows were beginning to shatter, scattering glass across the carpet.
"Shadow Milk, please just listen-"
"Orrr are you going to get rid of me for good instead of sealing? A healer you may be, but you've got the nerves to kill if you had to"
"SHADOW MILK"
The room was swallowed by light for a split second.
Shadow Milk covered his eyes, hissing angrily.
When he opened them back, he could feel cold, sharp metal pointed against his neck.
There, Pure Vanilla was breathing heavily, pressing a tip of a metal petal lightly against Shadow Milk's neck.
The jester narrowed his eyes, pupils thinning into slits.
"I see" he grumbled, turning into a shadow and slipping away.
Pure Vanilla's hand went up, pressed to his brooch.
It was pulsing unpleasantly, filled with anxiety.
Three nights have passed since their argument.
Shadow Milk has been gone since then, his presence nowhere to be found.
The ache in his Souljam has returned, slowly worsening.
The last time, it had taken over two months for it to get bad.
Maybe it was the suddenly broken proximity they were used to? Or the circumstances they both separated in.
Nontherless, he was not happy with all of the events that have occured recently.
Especially with the fact, that just after their initial fight, he had to go to a meeting to discuss a political conflict happening between the Créme Republic and Parfaedia.
Pure Vanilla felt drained after having to hear them bicker for three days about a small island found on the outskirts of Crispia.
All he wanted to do was rest, but even that impossible with the dull pain in his Souljam.
He let out a long breath, walking inside his chambers. Dusk was setting, basking the room in last rays of today's sun.
The healer rubbed his eyes, tired. But something quickly caught his attention.
There, in the corner of the room, a figure emerged from the shadows.
Shadow Milk had dark circles under his eyes and his hair was trashing around, dripping onto the fluffy, white carpet.
"Missed me?" he snarled, floating in front of Pure Vanilla.
His face twisted into a wicked grin, showing off a row of sharp teeth.
"Why did you leave?" the healer asked, voice steady. He pinned the other with a sharp gaze, making him still momentarilly.
"I- what?" even through his unweavering grin, the ancient could see confusion showing through.
"Why did you leave?" he asked again, ignoring the slight crack in his voice.
"Because" ShadowMilk's eyes shone dangerously, as darkness swallowed the room.
"I am not something to be tamed. Domesticated, or to be trusted. I am a beast and you, dear Vanilly, have been ignoring that fact for far too long"
He floated behind the hero of truth, kicking the back of his knee.
It made him crumple to the floor, kneeling against his will.
Shadow Milk grabbed his face with one hand a wrist with the other, digging his sharp nails into the soft dough.
Pure Vanilla closed his eyes shut, trashing slightly as the sharp nails gripping him dug in deeper, drawing a bit of jam.
"Tell me, oh legendary hero, did you really think its that easy to fool me?"
The hand on his face lowered, tightening around his neck.
The healer gasped, struggling to free himself.
His Souljam was buring. Shadow Milk most likely felt the same.
After what felt like an eternity, the hands gripping him let go, making him stumble as he fell to the floor.
The darkness started receeding, as Shadow Milk feel down onto the bed, gripping the sheets so tightly they were starting to rip.
Pure Vanilla joined him shortly after, pulling him down with him.
He pressed their foreheads together, as fresh tears spilled down their cheecks.
"Why... why do you keep doing this? You know I'll only end up hurting you over and over again" the beast chocked out, hating how pathetic his own voice sounded.
The saint opened his eyes, looking at him. His gaze was gentle - impossibly so.
"Because I want to help you. I want you to know you are not just a beast. You never were just a beast. I'm sorry for bringing up the possibility of friendship between us. Seems like I did it far too soon"
The jester pressed closer, seeking the warmth of another body next to him.
Clink
The soft sound echoed, as their Souljams were accidentally pressed together. It made them both gasp softly - a warm sensation spread through their bodies, making their eyes widen. The two blue gems were glowing, pulsing faintly with magic.
It caused them sleepiness, making their eyelids heavy.
Just before letting sleep claim them, Shadow Milk whispered, voice hoarse and cracked at the edges.
"I'm... sorry. Sorry for... all of this"
Pure Vanilla replied, tone thick with sleep as a ghost of a smile crossed his lips.
"It's alright"
Blue and gold swam under their eyelids as they slowly drifted off, still pressed next to eachother.