Chapter Text
It was the sound of socked feet cautiously shuffling around on the wooden floor boards that woke Megumi up this time. However it wasn’t the first thing Megumi registered.
A wave of pure relief washed over him when his consciousness was not immediately met with a crushing headache. His muscles still didn’t feel quite right but there was a vast improvement from the last time he was awake.
The most alleviating part of all was he knew exactly where he was this time. He was in Gojo’s room. Tucked comfortably under the sheets of Gojo’s bed where he’d passed out the previous night. He’d never take the ability to recall things clearly for granted again.
Stretching his leg out down the mattress, still in a doze, he turned onto his other side. Opening his eyes to reveal the tiniest sliver of sight. The other side of the bed was empty and the sheets were crumpled. He shouldn’t be all that surprised. Gojo was a busy man. But his pulse jumped nonetheless.
Like a lost puppy, his first instincts were to scan the room for Gojo’s presence. He didn’t need to search for long before a tall white-haired man entered his field of vision. Gojo was standing at the very far side of the room, his back facing Megumi. From what Megumi could make out, Gojo was without his sunglasses or blindfold. He must have only woken up recently then.
The rustling of sheets of course altered Gojo. There was a hum of realisation from the man before he turned around. A soft smile arrived on his face. “Ah mornin’ Gumi. Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you,” Gojo greeted. His voice had reestablished its cheeriness but was still fairly quiet. The fact Gojo chose now to greet him carefully now instead of when he was extremely hung over was just typical.
“It’s fine,” Megumi replied, slightly hoarse. He sat himself up against the headboard and reached over to the bed-side table. A tall glass of water was waiting for him which he grabbed immediately. Sipping from it every few seconds.
Once Gojo had finished putting on his watch, he strolled over to the end of his bed. There was a tinge of awkwardness in the air. Neither one wanted to start the day off with anything too heavy. But neither knew how exactly to begin a conversation without rehashing what happened before.
Gojo ended up choosing the safest option by asking Megumi how he was feeling. “Better thanks,” Megumi said, and then “What time is it?”. He hoped Gojo would recover his usual annoying charm sometime soon. Gojo knew him well enough that being treated as something fragile pissed him off more than it helped him.
“Seven twenty-five,” Gojo answered while looking down at his wrist. Flicking his uncovered blue eyes at Megumi, he teased, “That was the longest I’ve slept in years. You gotta get hungover regularly so I can sleep for nine and half hours more often!”
Megumi’s face quickly shifted into a frown. He would actually like to retract that precious wish.
“You’re insufferable,” he huffed, staring daggers at Gojo. Not fazed in the slightest, Gojo just chuckled to himself. “Relax, I’m just messing with you, Gumi chan. Where’s your sense of humour?” Gojo drawled with a pleased smirk.
He gritted his teeth. Annoyingly, he didn’t have it in him to be mad at Gojo’s insensitive comments. After everything that unravelled last night, he could suck up a little teasing. Besides, there was a small part of himself that appreciated Gojo returning to his lively irritating self. Just a small part though.
“Shut up,” he grumbled, which made Gojo smirk harder.
“I hope you don’t have that terrible attitude for today’s classes, Megs!” Gojo, still giggling to his own words, whipped his sunglasses out of him. Sliding them over his mesmerising azul eyes in one brisk movement. A thought passed into Megumi’s head. Questioning why Gojo chose his sunglasses over his blindfold.
Truthfully, he preferred it when Gojo forgoed his blindfold for his glasses. Staring Six Eyes head on was overwhelming if you glanced at them for too long. And Megumi couldn’t even imagine the strain they must cause the user.
As a kid, he would’ve said otherwise. Gojo had only started wearing something that completely covered his eyes two years ago. What six year old him would’ve done for Gojo to have started that nine years ago.
But after more private interactions and examining his persona in public, Megumi learned all the tells of Gojo Satoru. He valued being able to read Gojo’s eyebrows furrow or how he squinted his eyes when he was actually mad. And when he’d go without blinking for seconds if he was anxious or scared.
Perhaps Gojo had picked up on Megumi’s knowledge of his emotional cues. Which may have factored into his choice. Or perhaps Gojo just felt like wearing his sunglasses now. And wasn’t Megumi related in the slightest.
Megumi wasn’t about to ask him about it though. He wasn’t that enthralled by it really. Just curious enough for a swift thought to be created.
“I gave you all the day off yesterday, so all of you should be right and ready to go!” Gojo’s enthusiastic voice broke him out of his head. He pursed his lips.
Right, classes. With Itadori. Fantastic.
They didn’t have any lessons today as it was Sunday. Actual classes were reserved for weekdays. The weekends were solely focussed on combat and cursed energy training. Which meant he’d definitely have to spare Itadori at some point in the day. Gojo would probably put them together against both of their wills anyway.
Facing Itadori was daunting to say the least. As much as Megumi wished it was something he could drag out just another day longer, he knew a proper conversation was in order. Not like he had a clue of what he was going to say though.
His mind was working overtime to formulate a suitable plan. Except it was extremely difficult to do that when what he wanted to convey wasn’t clear.
Should he confess that he likes him? Just last night he’d committed to that idea. However the commitment did not have a set time or date where this action was meant to be completed. He could wait until the two have processed it more and then tell Itadori exactly how he feels. Or should he just rip the bandaid off now?
“I just don’t wanna fuck this up,” he had said last night on the bathroom floor. Sore and emotionally fragile from every angle. Still, there wasn’t a word that he hadn’t meant. Every ounce of him was terrified of the possibility of screwing everything up so badly that Itadori would hate him. The reasonable part of his brain was reminding him Itadori didn’t operate like. The fear still lingered though.
With a slow inhale, he decided this was too important to figure out by himself. Sheepishly, with his eyes glaring down at the ruffled sheets, he asked “What should I do, you know… about Itadori?”
Both of Gojo’s brows raised slightly before quickly returning to their original position. The smirk on his face never faltered. Slipping his hands into his pockets, Gojo released a quiet breath.
“I can’t decide something like that for you, Megs. That’s something you have to do on your own,” Gojo sighed, sounding slightly apologetic. So now Gojo had nothing for him the one time he specifically asked for it. Screw him and his frustrating but albeit, understandable logic. Megumi frowned harshly.
“However I don’t think you really need whatever my choice would’ve been. You already know deep down what you want. It’s just how to act on it, that’s the problem.” Gojo rattled off his assumption with confidence. His glare was zeroed in on Megumi with a stern smile. Biting the inside of his cheek, Megumi conceded that once again, Gojo hadn’t missed a beat.
For the longest time, Megumi was convinced he wasn’t allowed to want. Complacency and acceptance were what he lived his life around. Wanting things just left him in constant disappointment. Suppress and survive. That’s how he’d learned to live at five years old. All to protect his heart from picking up any more bruises than it's already sustained.
There were a lot of things Megumi wanted that he couldn’t have. Itadori was originally in that category too. Except, his ever growing feelings and desire for that boy had slowly tipped over the balance. The balance between his desire and survival instincts that was.
Because how could he not long for the first person, in a very long time, made him envision a future. How could he begin to persuade himself that only giving half of himself to Itadori was enough? He couldn’t. Not even for Itadori’s but for his sake as well.
To be with Itadori, that’s what he wanted. And it was entirely selfish on his part. But he was just following his guardian’s advice wasn’t he? So Megumi better act sooner rather than later. With sooner being today if all things fell in his favour.
His heart thudded rapidly in his chest and all this contemplating made beads of sweat form on his forehead. He hoped making a decision would ease his mind just a bit. But now it was buzzing with scenarios upon scenarios of every different outcome. He scrunched his hand into a fist, peering down at the sheets with uneasiness.
“I know what I have to do,” Megumi admitted quietly. And then with his voice unsteady and faint, he whispered, “But I’m still fucking scared.”
As his eyes were completely locked on the sheets below him, Megumi missed how Gojo’s features softened with his confession. A look of pride glimmering in his eyes. He carefully strolled over to Megumi’s side of the bed. Crouching down to Megumi’s level. Which was the exact moment that Megumi had realised Gojo had even moved.
Gojo tilted his head down ever so slightly and pushed his glasses a few centimetres down from his eyes. Allowing the top of his Six Eyes to peek over the top.
“Megumi,” he started, his voice strict, “There isn’t a single Jujutsu sorcerer that dies without regret. As I’m sure Yaga has told you before,” Megumi nodded cautiously. He remembered being fourteen and Yaga saying those exact words to him. It was only a few days after Tsumiki was cursed. His emotions were raw and all over the place. But at the time, the only thing he could feel was anger. So when he went to Yaga, informing him he was certain he wanted to be a Jujutsu sorcerer, those were the first words Yaga said to him.
He didn’t think anything of them at the time. All he was concerned with was seeking a cure for Tsumiki’s curse. And to him, Yaga was just stating the obvious. He only understood now the meaning behind that statement. Jujutsu sorcerers were always going to shoulder a deeper scale of regret than normal humans. Working in a job primarily focussed on keeping people alive would do that to you.
Groaning internally, Megumi wished he’d paid more attention a year ago. Maybe then he would’ve been able to process Itadori’s death better.
“But, this thing with you and Yuuji is not meant to be one of the causes for that. As the two of you have the power to create a successful outcome,” Gojo stated. His Six Eyes seeing right through Megumi’s soul.
“So don’t let your fear add onto the total pile of regret you’ll probably amount during your life.”
To any other person Gojo’s words would sound like a lecture. The twitch in his eye and his faltering smile told him otherwise. ‘Like how I did,' were words Gojo’s expression was secretly conveying to him. There was a sharp tug on his heartstrings. He vowed to himself right there and then he wouldn’t repeat the same mistake.
“I won’t, I promise.” Megumi swore earnestly. He even stared right back at Gojo to show just how set on his words he was. Gojo’s jaw clenched tighter but then relaxed again after a nervous breath. A calmer smile reappeared back on his lips. “Good kiddo,” was all he said as he stood up straight.
Megumi didn’t hide the faint grin on his own face. A small sense of pride fluttered through his body. Gojo let out a chuckle as he walked towards the door. “Anyway, see you at nine for sparring practice! You better not be late!” Gojo warned unseriously. Megumi only rolled his eyes.
“You’re always late,” he retaliated.
Gojo put on a betrayed scoff. He expected more of an overdramatic reaction and for Gojo to exaggerate his offence. Instead, the white-haired man just laughed off his insult. And with a loose posture he replied, “See you later kiddo. I’m proud of you.” He threw up a hand to perform a light wave as he exited the room.
The minute the door clicked shut, Megumi’s head fell into his hands. A pool of warmth rushing into his cheeks. If this was about to become a regular phrase Gojo would tell him then he was totally fucked. Because there were only so many times he could hide his reaction before Gojo caught him. Before he caught on just how much those words truly impacted him.
In all seriousness… was that really the worst thing in the world?
Itadori was avoiding him.
If the idiot was trying to hide that then he was doing a piss poor job.
It was unmistakable, the distance Itadori was trying to force between them that is. He first noticed it when he joined the other students at the main running track. Managing to arrive ahead of Gojo too. No surprise there.
There was a sudden shift in Itadori’s shoulders the second they both glanced in each other’s direction. Gone was the usual chipper greeting in Itadori’s voice. What he received was an awkward “Heyy Fushiguro,” as Itadori’s glance darted to everything but him. Whatever conversation he and Kugisaki were having before he arrived died a quick death. The only thing shared between them was everyone’s uncomfortableness.
He knew the blame was split amongst the two of them equally. As it wasn’t like Megumi made a conscious effort to relieve the tension either. But he couldn’t imagine a way to achieve that without bringing up that night.
Shoving down the paranoia that Itadori was repulsed by his presence now, he decided to focus all his energy on training. Well, attempted was a better word to phrase that.
When Gojo finally showed up, fifteen minutes late, he instructed everyone to divide into pairs. Informing them how they’d be mastering the use of cursed tools. He’d braced himself for Gojo to unsubtly coax him and Itadori together. Thankfully, Gojo decided to spare him of that discomfort. Allowing him to spar with Kugisaki with no objections.
He and Itadori rarely ever paired up together in training. Both understanding their two distinct fighting styles were better tested against other opponents. So he tried to not take it to heart the way Itadori bolted over to Maki. Not even paying him a competitive smile the way he normally did.
Kugisaki noticed that something was up immediately too. Asking “Can you just kiss and make up already?” as she swiped his feet out from under him with her staff. His face went an embarrassing shade of pink. He didn’t even try to argue back either. Only telling her to shut up as he picked himself up from the grass. Which Kugisaki took as seriously as Gojo took the Higher Ups’.
Any breaks and lunch were spent as a whole group. Never giving him a chance to catch Itadori alone. Which the guy was making incredibly hard for him too. Itadori was dodging Megumi left right and centre. Jumping from person to group every time Megumi joined the conversation.
He hated how Itadori, the guy who never ran from anything, chose to run from him. He’d witnessed Itadori in countless situations possessing just as much fear as he had. Situations where injury and death were very likely outcomes. Yet he always faced them head on.
So what was it about him that broke that pattern?
It rightly rubbed him up the wrong way. Only increasing his drive to get this whole mess sorted hastily. Whatever result awaited him, even if it broke his heart, he could handle it. Well he could certainly handle it better than his brian trapped in a loop of confusion. What he desperately needed was clarity.
The minute Gojo concluded their training session, Itadori rushed off, saying something about wanting a shower. Megumi wasn’t enough of a creep to confront him in the shower. But he couldn’t deny the frustration had made him consider it. Kugisaki let out a muffled cackle as she observed Megumi’s dishevelled expression live in action. In retaliation, he pettily asked how returning the wedding dress was going. With Maki still well in ear shot.
After a narrow miss of a palm to the cheek, he promptly resided back to his own dorm. He tidied up the leftover beer bottles under his bed and changed his bed sheets. Distracting his mind from lapsing into theories and unlikely reasoning for Itadori’s avoidance. The stress cleaning lasted until he heard the door shut in the room next to him. That was his signal to take his second shower of the day. Because while he was yearning for answers, he’d rather receive them not smelling like sweat and dirt.
Please, he had some dignity.
That said dignity decreased as he hurried over to Itadori’s dorm straight after his shower. Some of his limbs were still slightly damp and clinging to his shirt and trousers. But that was incredibly insignificant.
He stood outside Itadori’s door. Attentively listening to the squeak of the floorboards. A sign that Itadori was actually in there. And therefore, unable to flee. Unless Itadori chose to escape through the back door. But Megumi knew he wouldn’t dare run if Megumi had him on his own.
With a shaking fist and a strained exhale, he knocked on Itadori’s door with purpose. The pacing immediately halted. And for a good second there was absolutely no movement reported. Megumi was even worried Itadori wouldn’t open the door.
However, just as his hope was beginning to wither, the door was slowly dragged open. A rattled looking Itadori standing to the side of it. Clutching onto the door handle for dear life.
The sight of Itadori’s uneasy demeanour knocked any words out of his lungs. His whole body stiffened. Figuring out how to restore that level of determination that took over him while he was being shunned.
“Oh, Fushiguro.” Itadori said, his voice hollow. Megumi stopped his brows from furrowing too prominently. Back to a last name basis between them he supposed. “Hi,” was all Itadori had left to say after hours of avoidance.
This wasn’t the time to be angry though. He was here for one reason only. So he just had to suck up any hurt that lingered in his chest.
“We need to talk,” he declared, leaving no room for interruption. Itadori’s eyes widened, his grip on the door handle tightening. Megumi felt a knot form in his stomach. “Can I come in?” he asked, swallowing down the tension lodged in his throat.
“Yeah, um come in,” Itadori replied with a hint of hesitation. He stepped aside to allow Megumi in. Briskly, he filled the space before Itadori changed his mind. The door was pulled behind him almost instantly.
Itadori’s room always felt warm and lively. Somewhere he could go to escape the raging quietness of his room. Though, this time the scattered manga volumes and the poster of that famous movie star taunting him from the wall; It made him claustrophobic. The overwhelming pressure weighing on him from every part of his body. He began to understand Itadori’s need to run more.
That wasn’t an option he was willing to go down though. Because even if they couldn’t be more, he’d settle for the air being dissolved of the tension. If that meant them being okay. If it meant not losing him.
Standing upright, his back rigid, he worked up the courage to take that first step forward. Drawing his fingers into a wound fist with his nails digging into his skin. “Listen,” he began, the word coming out with less sternness than he’d liked.
Itadori stood about a metre and half away from him. The gap between them felt like a chasm. Itadori’s gaze had finally focussed entirely on him. His pupils flickering around his irises. But he never tried to take a step back. The chasm shrunk ever so slightly.
“About that night… and the day after actually. You asked me–” his sentence that took him way too long to finally communicate was cut short. Itadori’s whole body flinched when he started talking. Then it was like a switch flipped in his head. As he flung a hand to the back of head with a self-conscious smile, Itadori finally spoke to him.
And boy did he speak to him.
“Haha yeah that night! Wow um it was crazy alright? Actually we did a lot of crazy things didn’t we? But you can just ignore whatever we did, because y’know! We were totally wasted!” Itadori’s rambling came out as a rushed jumble of sounds that Megumi could barely comprehend. But he got the jist of the rant through the mess of noise.
He didn’t want to hear it though. Although it felt like a knife to the throat, Megumi couldn’t allow Itadori’s words to lodge into his head. He’d discard and only let them bruise if Itadori repeated them once at a normal pace.
Because he knew Itadori well enough to recognise when he was nervous. And this was one of those times. He was standing completely straight instead of leaning against the wall. The vein protruding in his neck was also a dead give away. If the anxious rambling wasn’t enough of a sign already.
“Itadori,” he said in a low tone. Doing his best to keep his cool. But Itadori was in a whole other world. Ignoring Megumi’s call like it was pure static.
“Alcohol really messes you up huh? I’m never drinking again. Like don’t get me wrong it was so much fun but I’m really paying the price for that now. Paying the price might be the wrong words actually. But y’know what I mean right?” Somehow Itadori’s tempo had only increased. And Megumi couldn’t recall the last time he’d actually taken a breath since he started ranting.
“Hey slow down,” he tried again. Which was ultimately a waste of time.
“Everything was just outta control. Kugisaki bought a freakin’ wedding dress. We nearly got caught by Yaga-Sensei. And then we um, yeah. Which was my fault and if I made you uncomfortable I’m so sorry! Something just came over me, probably the alcohol, and I–”
“Itadori!” Megumi shouted, which practically echoed through the whole zone. Itadori nearly jumped out of his skin. An invisible zip sealed his mouth shut almost immediately. He was blinking at Megumi, rapidly and flusteredly. And Megumi couldn’t look away. He took a heavy step forward and a breath that matched that.
With his emerald eyes locked on Itadori’s amber pair, he conformed to the words battling to slip out.
“I don’t regret.” he confessed with sincerity. Itadori needed to know just how strongly he felt about that. So he added, ”Not one bit.” in a hope to set him straight.
Itadori’s mouth hung open. Megumi could hear all the cogs in Itadori’s brain rotating as they pieced everything together. His body had gone eerily still. The overtalker Itadori had vanished in thin air. Megumi was grateful for that. At least now he knew Itadori was listening to every word he said.
The beat of silence lasted for around twenty seconds.
“Oh,” Itadori mouthed. His facial expression returned back to being frozen instantly. But his shoulders unlocked. Making him appear lighter. Megumi’s heart pounded in his chest and into his ear drums. He gave Itadori the briefest nod of acknowledgement then closed his eyes. Just for a second.
Shuddering, he peeled his eyes back open. The sight of Itadori straight in his field of vision made the butterflies in his stomach restless. His well built jaw line and his freshly washed hair seemed even more stunning in the mellow evening light. And it was worth asking the question for. Even if it meant losing the right to be in awe of them.
Unclenching his fists and with his voice wobbly, he asked, “Do you?”
He thought he might throw up again.
Itadori’s shock flipped to horror in an instant. He moved closer to Megumi, the action filled with panic. Megumi looked him up and down, noting how he was trembling too.
Shaking his head and their eyes still not leaving each other’s. Itadori yelled, “No! It was great, it’s just-”
The corners of Megumi’s lips shot up. His heart slowed down but still made its presence clear. He let out a noiseless chuckle. Itadori stared back at him, dumbfounded. Oh how he hoped he’d read his situation correctly. The newly installed confidence was transmitted throughout every vein in his body.
“Good. So, I’m guessing…” he carefully brought his hand up, placing it on Itadori’s cheek. Then he leaned in, reducing nearly all distance between their heads. Itadori’s long lashes fluttered back at him. His brown eyes were sparkling and even though he wasn’t smiling, Megumi could see how at ease he was.
So he pressed his forehead onto Itadori’s. They were so close that he could feel Itadori’s warm breath on his cheek. Cupping Itadori’s cheek and with Itadori leaning into his touch was all he needed. “It’s okay to do this then?” he whispered. Itadori nodded without hesitation.
Megumi didn’t miss a beat.
He kissed Itadori with as much gentleness as he possessed. And Itadori was quick to return the gesture. He planted a hand on Megumi’s hip, pulling him in. The other grasped onto his shoulder. Tight enough that his nails would definitely imprint into his skin. Not like Megumi minded.
This kiss was the exact opposite to the first one. It was slow but every movement was carried out with a reason. Their lips gliding off each others’ as they adjusted their heads. Wanting to deepen the kiss as much as physically possible.
The increasing intensity of the kiss caused Itadori to wobble. Grabbing onto Megumi’s waist for support. Their lips still pressed against each other all the same. Instinctively, Megumi strided forward, leading Itadori to the nearest wall. There was a noticeable thud as Itadori’s back hit the wall. Fearing that he hurt him, Megumi parted the kiss to apologise. Before he could get the words out, Itadori shut him up with another kiss. The smile on his lips only widened.
About three minutes had passed where the two were chasing each others’ lips like a game of tag. Neither saying a word to each other as they supported each other with their touch. Intimate didn’t even begin to describe it. It was like they were living in their own little bubble. Where nothing else matters other than to keep the other near. Eventually, Itadori slowly dragged his head back. Gazing at Megumi with utter blissfulness.
“Fushiguro,” Itadori breathed, panting quietly.
“Megumi,” he corrected sharply. His content smile morphed to a sly smirk. Itadori’s eyes twinkled and then giggled softly as he secured his grip on Megumi’s waist.
“Megumi, so you liked it that much huh?” Itadori teased playfully. Looking beyond pleased with himself. Megumi sighed with feigned annoyance. Tempted to deny Itadori’s claim just to piss him off. But he stopped himself. Because as Itadori was holding him like this, the last thing he wanted was to upset him.
So with his cheeks flushed and the tiniest bit of awkwardness in his shoulders, he replied honestly, “Yeah, I really liked it,”
Itadori, briefly stunned by Megumi’s directness, sucked in a deep inhale through his nose. Then, his thumb brushed the blade of Megumi’s shoulder. The apple of his cheeks lifted and his eyes erupting with care.
Never in his life could he describe a time as perfect.
And there probably wouldn’t ever be.
But, this moment, in Itadori’s embrace after receiving the best kiss of his life. Where his brain was finally switched off. Not plaguing him with every doubt and insecurity he’d stored up for months. He was just purely enjoying himself. Allowing him that happiness he didn’t know he was entitled to have. This was the closest to perfect as it could get.
“I really like you, Yuuji,”
The confession came out naturally and most importantly, intentionally. He probably didn’t even need to say it. By the way they’d kissed each other and melted into each other's touch, Itadori probably knew.
Some things don’t have to be a need for them to be done though. You can just want.
And Megumi just wanted to. There was nothing stopping him either.
They way Itadori’s teeth were gleaming at him immediately proved that he had made the right call. He’d never seen Itadori’s hazelnut eyes beam this brightly before. The hushed rays of sunlight really made his shining presence pop too. Everything just felt so right.
“That’s great because, well, I really like you too Megumi,” Itadori gushed. It was ridiculous how much those few words filled him with joy. His hand gave Itadori’s cheek the lightest squeeze. Itadori laughed and made his stomach flip. Then his smile became more muted. Still there, just with a bit of worry wedged in there.
“I like you so much that I’ve been freakin’ out all day and night because I thought I lost you,” Itadori admitted, his head bowing with shame. The end of his sentence sounded raw with a hint of anxiousness.
Megumi just blinked at him. His left brow raised. “You really thought I’d stop hanging out with you if I didn’t like the kiss?” he questioned with both a mixture of hurt and stress. Itadori fidgeting against the wall. Megumi loosened his grip. Not wanting Itadori to feel like a caged animal.
Darting his eyes to the floor, Itadori replied, “I mean obviously I know you aren’t that much of a dick to do that but,” Itadori’s shoulders sagged. Then he picked his eyes back up to meet Megumi’s. “I don’t know, guess I just got scared that’s all. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to be scared,” Megumi fired back immediately. The instant reply sent Itadori into a state of shock. His chest rose and fell while he struggled to come up with a response. Fortunately, Megumi didn’t let him get that far.
“You have me, Yuuji. I don’t plan on leaving you any time soon unless you’re planning on leaving me,” he declared, giving Itadori the sternest glare he could muster.
“I’m not,” Itadori proclaimed without giving an extra time to even consider it. Megumi’s entire body exhaled a massive sigh of relief. He replaced his frown with a tame smile. Dropping his head on Itadori’s shoulder, allowing his nervous system to finally relax. A warm hand started threading through his hair.
He hummed and mumbled into Itadori’s shoulder, “Okay, that’s good because I just want to be with you for as long as possible.”
The hand in his hair stilled. His pulse shot right back up. Crap, was that too much? He thought it was best to be honest. Maybe that was too cheesy and Itadori–
“Fushiguro Megumi,” Itadori breathed. Anxiously, Megumi pulled his head off Itadori’s shoulder. For a second he thought Itadori would be glaring at him with disgust. Instead he was met with a wide and comforting grin. He returned the smile.
“Wanna go out with me?”
Megumi stopped breathing.
Internally, every neuron in his brain was screaming. Mostly with excitement and joy. There were some muffled yells of doubt. But they were muffled for a reason. And Megumi still hadn’t given Itadori an answer externally.
“Yeah, I’d love that” his response was matched with fake composure and a mellow smile.
He’d meant to say more. However, Itadori didn’t give him a chance. Smashing his lips against Megumi’s with no space for him to escape. As if Megumi would ever entertain that thought. He kissed Itadori back with purpose. Teeth grazing against each other. They just snorted as they battled for air so they wouldn’t have to break away from each other.
Itadori’s arms linked around Megumi’s neck. “I’ve wanted to ask you that,” he panted, giving Megumi’s bottom lip a quick suck. “For so long,”
“Me too,” Megumi rasped. He angled his head, opening his mouth wider as Itadori kept increasing the pace. A laugh from Itadori was released into his mouth.
“We’re such idiots. We could’ve been doing way earlier if we’d just fucking confessed!”
Or gotten drunk. Megumi decided not to mention that though.
“Speak for yourself,” he mocked jokingly. Itadori pouted while kissing him. Then he gave Megumi’s lip a swift and light nip. Not enough to draw blood but just enough to scare him. Megumi jerked with surprise but took no offence.
Itadori was his now. He could kiss Megumi however he wanted. Just having Itadori as his was all he could ask for. It still felt surreal to even think. Yet it was the only thing buzzing in his head. Which was definitely not a bad thing.
With a loud slam, the door flew open. Nearly ricochetting against the wall with the sheer amount of power packed into it. Before Megumi and Itadori could untangle from each other’s embrace, Kugisaki stormed in like she owned the place.
“Itadori you gotta make up with Fushiguro because he’s taking it all out on me! Guess what– holy shit,” Kugisaki’s scream was abruptly cut off the minute she set eyes on the two. Itadori with his back pressed against the wall and Megumi holding onto his side with a tight grip. Their faces flooded with fluster and also having only a few centimetres between them made it easy for Kugisaki to put two and two together.
“Wow, you really took my advice to heart huh Fushiguro?” Kugisaki said blankly.
Itadori glanced at him with perplexity. Megumi groaned, “In your dreams,” He was not letting her have an ounce of credit for his ideal new circumstance. Itadori just shrugged and the two broke away from each other. Kugisaki rolled her eyes.
“Whatever,” she sighed. Then after looking them up and down for the second time, her lips formed a soft smile. “I’m happy for you though. I was sick of all that pining anyway.”
It was Megumi’s turn to toss his eyes up to heaven. Like she could talk.
“So what happened?” Itadori piped up, utterly confused. He was so fucking cute when he was clueless. If Kugisaki wasn’t here he’d kiss him all over his lips and onto his cheeks.
Said Kugisaki threw herself theatrically on Itadori’s bed. Face planting into the sheets. They both climbed onto the bed as she complained about how Megumi nearly ruined everything. He didn’t. Maki didn’t seem to notice but Kugisaki was convinced she was just playing it cool. Megumi slumped against Itadori’s side. Extremely grateful that delusion and rationalisation was exorcised from his life now.
As the rambling and reassurance dragged on, the blue night sky filtering in through the glass. Tonight, the dark navy of the night was combined with a very subtle pink hue. Adding a tone of liveliness to the usual calm horizon. It shone directly into the room, illuminating the trio. Producing something commonly known as an afterglow.
Megumi turned up to gaze at Itadori. His pink hair appeared even shinier in this lighting. Actually all his features really dazzled as the mixture of light beamed down on him. And as the silhouette of Megumi’s hair casted onto the bottom corner of his cheek, they never dulled. Instead the contrasting lights blended together. Like a piece of artwork belonging to a national gallery.
Even after Megumi had once believed this reality was not destined for them; There they were. Sitting on Itadori’s bed side by side. Together, meeting in the afterglow.
Satoru slid the shoji door shut with no care in the slightest. Clicking his tongue with annoyance. Man what he would pay for Yaga to let him hollow purple The Higher Ups’ with zero consequences.
Those stuck-up old geezers had summoned him to discuss Tsumiki’s current state. That’s how they had put it anyway. What they actually wanted was to pull funding for her care. Since, in their eyes, it was a miracle if she’d ever wake up again. Satoru was undoubtedly appalled. Because it’s not like these bastards were stuck for money. Which he voiced very strongly to them during the meeting.
However, he didn’t refuse. As he also had more wealth than an average person could ever dream of. And he’d rather not have anything for The Higher Ups’ to hold over his head anymore. He would’ve been perfectly fine with paying her medical bills from the start as well. But she was registered under Jujutsu High’s billing address. Since technically, they were the ones in charge of providing her financial aid.
If he hadn’t been so run down with a swamp load of missions and keeping Megumi from falling apart, he would’ve changed that in a heartbeat. Except he had been and rewriting history sadly hadn’t manifested into his curse technique. The Strongest sorcerer of the modern day never made the same mistake twice though.
When Megumi was all beaten up and bloody from his mission in Sendai, Satoru asked Shoko for Megumi’s medical records immediately. Fixing a detail he should’ve fixed years ago.
Tsumiki was only sixteen. She had so much to live for and Satoru wouldn’t allow a bunch of old hags to cut it short for her. Not when they didn’t even know her. Not when they didn’t watch her dream about becoming a meteorologist since she was nine. Spending her (infinite) allowance on astrology magazines that she forced Megumi to read too.
Satoru wasn’t ready to let her dream die before she got an opportunity to carry it out.
He wasn’t ready to let her die.
The cool nightly breeze whooshed passed him. He promptly stuck his hands into his pockets. Strolling along the stone paths, he admired the clarity of the pond water. Nights like these were rare for him. Usually he was gallivanting off for another mission the second his meetings or lessons concluded. The withdrawal of curses in winter was probably the reason for his extra free time. Or maybe having just gotten back from South Korea warranted a night off.
Laughing humourlessly to himself, he felt foolish for even considering The Higher Ups’ cared if he was overworked.
Making the most of his free schedule, he studied the reflection floating on the surface of the water. A pale crescent glistened in the corner of the water. Satoru could identify its lunar cycle as a waxing crescent. A sad smile formed on his lips. Peering up to the sky, he whispered a quiet “Thanks ‘Miki,” to nobody but himself.
Then, he made a mental note to visit her in the hospital some time soon. Which he must remember to align with Megumi’s schedule. It had been a while since either of them visited. Which Satoru kicked himself for every time he checked his calendar. He wasn’t sure what Megumi’s reason for his absence but he had his suspicions.
Megumi was a lot like him in some ways. Turning up at Tsumiki’s bedside just to not have cure, to be utterly useless; it hurt more than scattered visits. Both him and Megumi have always been awful at sitting back and letting things happen around them. They had to be active every second of the day, to distract from their failures. Or rather, to make up for them.
It felt stupid to say Megumi inherited that trait from him. They weren’t even related. Megumi was his own person with his own ideals and belief system. The kid had always been so strong willed after all. But, Satoru knew he’d never develop such a mindset out of nowhere. And it certainly wasn’t from Tsumiki.
His chuckle came out as vapour due to the cold air. If sixteen year old Satoru could see himself now, concerned that Zen’in Toji’s son picked up one of his exasperating traits, he would’ve laughed in his face.
The truth was, when Toji told Satoru about his kid and his sale to the Zen’in Clan, he paid no attention to it. That man had almost killed him. Why would he do anything for him?
Actually, his words were “Do whatever you want with that” rather than clear instructions. Anyone could tell the implications behind them though.
He shoved Toji’s words into a vault secured by a dozen locks. It wasn’t until Suguru left that he undid one of those locks. Soon more and more locks became unbuckled. The words he’d been ignorant of haunting him every second his mind wasn’t occupied with Suguru related thoughts. This was his karma he supposed.
Curiosity and also just a fraction of guilt led him to that dingy and grimy alleyway. He’d done the bare minimum amount of research on the kid. Only knowing his name was Fushiguro Megumi, his address, his age and his cost. Any other information seemed unnecessary to learn. As it wasn’t like he was planning on spending too much with Megumi. Just offer him an unrejectable deal and get out of there. That was the plan.
His plan quickly went to shit the second he met Megumi though. The kid’s displeased pout and jet black hair threw him off his guard. A harrowing image of Toji flashed into his head for longer than was acceptable. And that wasn’t the only surprise.
For a first grader, Megumi was way too mature for his age. The way he spoke was filled with indifference. While he wanted to respect that, the strings in his heart were pulled just a centimetre. Kids were meant to be filled with overflowing emotions that they learn to control as they get older. Not when they were six.
And when a small scrawny girl with mid length brown hair emerged onto the balcony, the strings were tugged tighter. Waving down at her brother, seeming relieved he’d just made it home to that joke of an apartment. His first thought leapt to wondering how they were still alive.
Megumi was remarkably smart so Satoru didn’t bother sugar coating anything. The odds of him seeing straight through his lies was practically guaranteed. He liked how perceptive the kid was even if the likely reason was definitely tragic. He was also grateful Megumi cared even less about Toji than he did. Uncommitingly, he set a mental reminder to inform the truth about his father in the future. Only if the kid asked though.
When Megumi accepted his offer, being for his sister’s sake rather than his own, he gave his hair a hard ruffle. Assuming that the hard part of his job was done.
Boy, was he wrong.
Buying out Megumi’s contract to the Zen’in Clan posed little to no problem for him. Sure, the Gojo Clan weren’t thrilled with twelve million yen suddenly being vacant from their assets. But Satoru couldn’t have given less of a shit. This was just him following out the next steps to his plan.
Where his intentions had derailed was when Satoru unconsciously started to care for the two. Originally, he thought dumping the money Jujutsu High owed them on their rotting kitchen table was enough. As well as paying them the odd visit when he felt like it.
The kids never seemed to care whether he was there or not. Tsumiki would always welcome him with open arms. Greeting him with a cheery “Hello!” and would tell him about her day when asked. Megumi didn’t share her enthusiasm. He glared at Satoru like he was a piece of dirt on his shoes. The most Satoru could get out of him was a rare “Hey,” or one word answer about his lessons. Tsumiki would insist Megumi should stop being so rude but Satoru just laughed it off.
He enjoyed how much his presence seemed to bother Megumi. How he’d always act so tough even though he struggled with tying his shoelaces. Which always ended up with him reluctantly trodding over to Satoru, not saying a word as he frowned at his knotted laces. So Satoru started dropping by more often. His excuse was to see how far Megumi will go before he asked for his help.
However, the more often he dropped by, the more the kids began to reach out for him. Making him realise that they were still in fact, kids. They weren’t capable of taking care of themselves the way that was required of them. This was displayed to him when Tsumiki asked him to peel a potato as she kept cutting herself on the peeler. Or when Megumi nearly fell off a chair when he was trying to turn on the hot water. It wasn’t long before Satoru began to worry about them.
His visits became daily. Even when some days he’d have missions that lasted longer than twelve hours. Megumi protested this decision profusely. Speaking to him even less than when he used to visit once a week.
But that was when Tsumiki truly started to open up to him. She blabbered to him about how delighted she was to have the same clothes as her friends. How excited she was when they started to learn about space in school. How exhausted she actually was keeping everything running smoothly each day.
He heard how shy her voice got at that confession. Like a reflex, he wrapped her in his arms. It was a clumsy hug if you’d ever seen one. He wasn’t quite used to them himself yet. Tsumiki didn’t notice though.
Her thin arms latched around Satoru’s torso, forehead pressed into his chest. He promised her that she didn't have to take care of everything by herself anymore. Tsumiki held him tighter, thanking him as her breathing started to even out. And for the first time since Suguru’s defection, he felt safe again.
Things really changed after that day. He stuck to his promise and took on the role as the prime caretaker for both kids. Tsumiki went from liking his company to trusting him. The road to getting Megumi on the same page took a lot longer though. Satoru was aware he’d be a challenge but not to the extent he was.
Megumi had become more polite with him over time. It didn’t change that he’d still shoot Satoru a questioning stare whenever he offered to help him. Maybe he didn’t help himself when he teased Megumi whenever he got the chance. It was just so satisfying the way his face would scrunch up with irritation.
Sometimes, he was tempted to give up. Accept that Megumi would never let him in and they’d only really get along when it came to fighting cures. But then he’d stop and think how Suguru would kill him if he heard that. Lecturing him about how he’s the one who chose to take care of two kids. And he better not half ass the job he put on himself.
So he kept trying to build some sort of a bridge with Megumi. No matter how many times Megumi would roll his eyes at him or call him some type of name, he relented. To his surprise, it actually paid off.
One sunny afternoon, about six months after he’d first taken the kids under his care, he was walking Megumi back from school. Which Megumi had of course protested to. Ordering him to leave him alone and nearly started walking the other way from him. Satoru would’ve let him as he knew the kid would eventually follow him home fairly shortly. But for some reason, Megumi begrudgingly turned to Satoru’s direction and began his walk home.
They had made their way down a sketchy lane when suddenly, a grade three cursed sprung out from the corner. Its sharp claws lunged straight for Megumi’s head. Satoru didn’t even have time to acknowledge how his stomach dropped at the sight. He put his whole body in front of Megumi’s. Who had let out a terrified yelp Satoru wished he’d never have to hear again.
In a blink of an eye, he blasted the curse with Blue and its body exploded mid air. Luckily, Satoru had activated limitless around them both, so none of the repulsive curse blood splattered on them. Once he was certain no other curses were near, he turned back to Megumi. His tiny body was trembling and Satoru could see the terror plastered all over his little face.
“Hey, it’s okay now Megs,” he reassured softly, crouching down to Megumi’s level. For a good second Megumi could only blink at him. Then after a violent whole body shuddering, his shoulders dropped as he threw himself at Satoru’s chest. His hands gripped onto Satoru’s shirt for dear life. His knees were digging into Satoru’s lap. Cautiously, he shifted Megumi into his arms and secured him tightly. Ignoring how his shirt was beginning to become soaked with small droplets.
He carded his hand through Megumi’s hair and nearly jumped when the kid leaned into it. A warmth mixed with uncertainty flooded into his bloodstream. “You’re safe now,” he whispered. That made Megumi sob even harder, his nail digging into Satoru’s chest.
“I- I was so mean to you– and,” Megumi croaked through his tears, “You still saved me. Without even thinking about it,”
His mouth parted but no sound emerged. He pulled Megumi closer into his chest. Trying to block out how his heart shattered just then. “Of course kid,” he answered, his own voice wavering.
“I don’t hate you, I-”
“Megumi, it’s okay. I know you don’t,” Satoru reinforced. Something in his chest contracted. Somewhere in his head he’d always had his doubts. He couldn’t let Megumi know that though.
What he didn’t want was for Megumi to apologise. He hadn’t earned it, he was just doing what every good guardian should be doing for their kid. Protecting them.
While there were times where Satoru had pouted after Megumi called him an asshole. Playing with the idea of an apology, but never expected to ever receive one. Most of the time, he understood Megumi’s apathy towards him wasn’t personal. He’d been served an unfair start to life. Resulting in him facing more hardship than an average person would have to go through in their whole life.
Understandably, Megumi was hurt. He was angry. And the most glaring fact of all, he was a child. Satoru would never allow him to carry any remorse for processing his very adult feelings like a child should. He knew better than anyone how lonely that truly was.
Moving forward, Megumi was more compliant to his assistance. It started out small. Not pushing Satoru away when he offered to help with his homework. Asking for his help to extend how long he could summon his divine dogs. Snuggling into his side when all three of them watched a movie. Every time Satoru noticed these tiny steps forward, he bit his lip to stop himself from making fun of Megumi. Not risking setting their progress back any further.
The day Satoru felt Megumi’s walls drop to just a low slab, was after he returned back to the apartment after a two day mission. After quickly checking everything was alright, he plopped himself down on the ragged sofa. He was seconds away from drifting off to sleep when he heard shuffling coming from across the room. Before he had a chance to overwork his already exhausted Six Eyes, a bony figure climbed onto the couch beside him. Resting his head on Satoru’s upper arm.
“Missed you idiot,” Megumi breathed, curling himself in on him further. Satoru’s heart swelled. Drosily, his voice barely above a whisper, “Missed you too bud,”. Megumi froze but didn’t get up. An overpowering feeling of vindication and soft snores lulled him to sleep that night.
It didn’t take much convincing for Tsumiki and Megumi to agree to move into a new apartment. One in an area that wasn’t riddled with crime and disease. Satoru decided to relocate them to his flat in Saitama. As it was currently collecting a whole lot of dust. Shortly after the kids moved in, Satoru finally saw the place as a home.
Their home.
Kicking off his shoes at the genkan, he slipped into a pair of slippers as he entered the first year dorms. An easy smile on his lips. He really had gone and gotten himself attached hadn’t he? That was the furthest thing he’d anticipated to happen.
Seeking out those kids was an entirely selfish act on his part. It was only fair the two got him back by messing with his own conscience.
Shoko would always tell him not to beat himself up if he screwed up with the two. That he saved them from a life of poverty and misery. While she wasn’t inherently wrong, she’d also missed a very important part of that claim. They saved him just as much as he saved them. Filling the void Suguru left in his soul in more ways than he could count. Without them being a constant presence in his life, Satoru wasn’t sure if he’d still be standing tall right now.
While it certainly deviated from his initial ideals, he would do it all again without hesitation.
Sighing to himself, he really needed to stop being so reminiscent. Especially when he was on his way to lecture his kid and his two idiot friends for their wild night. More on the fact of being smarter about drinking and hiding the evidence rather than the act itself. It was comical how little the underage drinking affected him. He just couldn’t deal with having to cover their asses another time.
Admittedly, there was a large part of him that was delighted to know Megumi had let himself go a bit off the reins. He was finally acting like a dumb teenager for once. He wasn’t planning on encouraging this behaviour any time soon. But who was Satoru to take away a drunken adventure from the youth?
His eyelashes fluttered against his sunglasses. Those nights he spent with Suguru and Shoko, pissed out of his mind, were some of the best times of his life. With the following mornings usually being some the worst mornings of his life but he digressed. He wanted Megumi to experience the same chaotic nights before he’d barely have to breathe with all the missions he’d be shipped to.
As Satoru sauntered down the corridor, he detected Megumi’s and Yuuji’s cursed energy buzzing from the kitchen. Lengthening his strides, as he was immensely nosey to examine the fallout. Sue him for being invested in teenager drama. While he hoped it worked out for the two of them, he mainly favoured Megumi’s wellbeing in the outcome.
Good teachers shouldn’t have favourite students. Who classified him as a good teacher anyway?
Arriving at the doorway of the communal living area, his mouth was already open to make a grand entrance. It was immediately clamped shut. The main light was off, making the flashing pictures from the television being the only source of illumination. Whatever movie had been playing had the volume lowered almost to zero. And then he gazed at the couch. He couldn’t prevent his smile from mellowing.
Megumi’s back was slumped against the couch while Itadori used his shoulder as a pillow. Their hands were interlocked and rested on top of the blanket they’d thrown over themselves. There was no denying the two were extremely comfortable together but this was different. They looked cosy, snug and protected by each other’s love. They looked in love as a pair instead of just individually.
Oh Suguru. Inhaling, a certain feeling dulled the contentment in his heart. No matter how hard he tried, he’d never stopped envisioning himself and Suguru in Megumi and Yuuji. He knew it wasn’t fair to compare their relationships. Separating the two always posed a challenge to him when Megumi reminded him so much of Suguru and him.
Clearly, there was one difference between the two duos though. Megumi and Yuuji had become what he and Suguru never did. Even though there was the same amount of love shared between each person.
In another life, he wouldn’t have been a coward and confessed to the man he loved. In another life, Suguru wouldn’t have defected. In another life, Suguru would be here with him to take in this beautiful moment. But in this alternative life he was imagining, would he have become Megumi’s and Tsumiki’s guardian? And was that swap worth it?
He gripped onto the side of the wall. There was no point in daydream about other possible realities. Treasuring the sight of his kid snuggled against the love of his life was his main priority.
When Megumi finally noticed him, he turned his head to the sleeping Itadori and then back to Satoru. With his shoulders relaxed, he gave Satoru a shy, concurring smile. Satoru hummed with delight.
Excitement, glee, pride. Those were the three main emotions consuming Satoru’s mind. Megumi had come so far from the kid he’d first met in that filthy alleyway. He’d always been guarded and closed off. Questioned his own self-worth and disregarded his happiness in exchange for others.
However, it seemed like he’d finally figured out that a tad bit of selfishness wasn’t something to be ashamed of. Finally, he’d put himself first. And Satoru couldn’t be more proud of him.
Sticking up an ecstatic thumbs up, he mouthed, “Nice job kiddo,” which made Megumi’s ears turn red. Turning on his heel, he exited the doorway and started his commute back to his room. Whatever unserious lecture he’d prepared could wait for another day.
Satoru had never claimed to be Megumi’s father or even a parental figure at all seriously. He’d never tried to erase Megumi’s father from the picture. He was just simply present all throughout his childhood. Yet, there was a warmth coursing throughout his body that could only be understood by a parent.
Before last night, that feeling would’ve been considered ludicrous. Megumi didn’t think of Satoru as anything parental related. He had no right to claim it.
That idea was quickly pushed to the side when Satoru had let it slip in the heat of the movement. Calling Megumi his kid before he acknowledged exactly what he admitted. It was when Megumi hugged him with his full strength, crying with sheer alleviation, did he realise how he should’ve told him sooner.
He didn’t give two fucks about blood or what a piece of paper said. Megumi and Tsumiki were his kids. They were his family. And it wasn’t because he’d given his whole early twenties to raise them. No. It was the fact he would risk everything to protect them in ways that weren’t even plausible.
Yeah, Megumi was definitely his kid.
While Satoru was immensely aware he’d made countless mistakes when it came to Megumi. He could make peace with that knowing that he did one thing right with him.
Helping him do what he couldn’t do himself.
Breaking the most twisted curse of all time; Love. It was Megumi’s braveness that broke the cycle. But Satoru could take just the tiniest bit of credit for inspiring his decision. He knew it was egotistical of him but when was he not?
And since it resulted in Megumi’s happiness, did it really matter? He’d guided his kid to getting exactly what he deserved. The person who he loved, right be his side in the way he wanted. So if that’s what his kid needed to continue picturing a future version of himself, that was the thing that contributed to most of Satoru’s happiness.