Chapter Text
Cragen parked the car at the entrance to Mercy General Hospital and turned off the engine, giving Olivia a worried look. She didn't move, just stared at the hospital door, as if bracing herself for something she didn't want to face.
"Liv?" he called softly. She blinked a few times, but didn't respond. Her fingers were digging into the sides of the seat, her knuckles white from the force of the pressure. The older man sighed and, with fatherly care, reached out to hold her hand.
"I know you're scared, honey. But we need to go inside." Cragen's firm, calm voice made her swallow hard. She nodded, but her body didn't obey. Her teary eyes remained fixed on the hospital door; he didn't press. He just squeezed her hand lightly, waiting.
After a few seconds, Olivia finally took a deep breath and unbuckled her seatbelt with trembling hands. As soon as she got out of the car, her legs felt wobbly, as if they would give way at any moment.
"Whoa, I got you," Cragen said quickly, grabbing her arm before she lost her balance. She closed her eyes and nodded.
"Sorry."
"No need to apologize, sweetie. Let's take it slow." He kept his hand firmly on her elbow as they walked toward the hospital entrance, each step seeming more difficult than the last, and the nausea that had already accompanied her pregnancy only worsened with her nervousness.
As soon as they entered, the brunette was struck by the sterile smell of the hospital mixed with something metallic and cold. The sound of the monitors, the hurried footsteps of the nurses, and the low voices of the patients and family members made her even more tense. She quickly approached the reception desk, gripping the counter tightly.
"Ed Tucker," she managed, her voice weak. "He's been in an accident. Where is he?" The receptionist typed something on the computer and looked at her sympathetically.
"Mr. Tucker has been taken to surgery. He's in the operating room now. The attending physician will be with you as soon as possible."
She blinked a few times, as if trying to absorb the information. Surgery. Her chest tightened.
"He's… He's alive?" Her voice was barely audible. The receptionist hesitated for a second, then nodded.
"Yes. But it was a serious accident." Olivia staggered back. If Cragen hadn't been at her side, holding her arm, she would have fallen.
"Let's sit down," he suggested gently, guiding her to one of the waiting room chairs.
She let him lead her, but as soon as she sat down, she began rocking back and forth slightly, pressing her hands against her stomach. Don sat beside her and put his arm around her shoulders.
"Breathe, Liv. He's strong. He'll get through this." She nodded, but didn't look convinced.
And then, time began to drag. Minutes turned into hours.
With each nurse who passed, Olivia sat up a little in her chair, her heart racing, waiting for news, but no one called out to her. Cragen tried to convince her to drink water, to eat something, but she refused.
"I can't," she murmured, hugging herself. "Not until I know he's okay." He didn't insist. He just stayed beside her, waiting.
A few more hours passed. Olivia could no longer control the tremors in her hands. Her stomach was churning, and the feeling that she might faint at any moment was strong.
Finally, a doctor appeared in the hallway, still wearing his blue surgical gown.
"Edward Tucker's family?" Olivia stood up so quickly she almost fell, but Cragen caught her.
"It's me," she said, her voice trembling. "I'm—his fiancée."
The doctor nodded, looking at her seriously.
"Mr. Tucker suffered severe head trauma from the impact of the accident. During surgery, we managed to stop the internal bleeding and stabilize him, but he's still unconscious. The next few days will be crucial to his recovery."
The word "head trauma" echoed in Olivia's mind like a deafening bell.
"Will he wake up?" she asked desperately. The doctor hesitated.
"We can't say for sure yet, but we're monitoring him closely. He's in the ICU now." Olivia felt her legs weaken. Don caught her arm before she fell.
"Can we see him?" Cragen asked. The doctor nodded.
"Only one person at a time." Cragen looked at Olivia and nodded encouragingly.
"Go, Liv. He needs you." She took a deep breath and, even though she was shaking from head to toe, followed the doctor to the ICU.
_____
Olivia donned the disposable cap, mask, and blue gown without really registering what she was doing. Her hands were shaking so badly it took her two tries to tie the straps behind her back. The nurse beside her offered help, but she declined with a brusque shake of her head. She had to do this, had to maintain control, even though everything inside her was in tatters.
Taking a deep breath, she followed the nurse down the cold ICU corridor. The smell of antiseptic and the low sound of the monitors mingled with the buzzing in her ears, each step she took seemed more difficult than the last.
And then, she saw him.
Ed was there, lying on the bed, pale as never before. His face was marred by small cuts and bruises, and the bandage around his head indicated the exact spot where they'd performed the surgery. Wires and tubes were connected to him, monitors beeping softly around him. His chest rose and fell slowly but steadily.
He was alive.
That realization should have been a relief, but it wasn't. Not when he looked so fragile. Not when he hadn't woken up yet.
Olivia felt her stomach churn, and she placed a hand on her stomach in an automatic reflex, trying to contain the wave of despair that threatened to overwhelm her.
Without thinking, she walked to the bed and took his hand in both of hers. It was warm, but limp.
"Ed..." Her voice was weak, shaky, and she cleared her throat, trying to gather strength.
"I... I don't know if you can hear me, but I need you to hear me, okay?" She took a deep breath, blinking back the tears already clouding her vision.
"You can't do this to me. You can't leave us, Ed. I... I'm here, I'm with you, but I need you to come back to me." She squeezed his hand, waiting for him to respond. A movement. Anything. But he remained still.
Desperation grew even deeper in her chest.
"You promised, remember? You promised you wouldn't let me down. You promised you'd take care of me, the baby, Sophie, your grandson. The four of us need you. How can I do this alone, Ed?"
Her voice cracked, and the tears she'd tried so hard to hold back fell uncontrollably.
"We were doing so well, weren't we? We were starting over. I was starting to believe we could work again. That we could be a family."
She lowered her head, resting her forehead against his hand.
"I can't lose you. I can't..." The rhythmic beeping of the monitors was the only answer she received.
Olivia's heart was beating so fast she could feel it in her skull, fear tightening her chest like an invisible chain, making every breath difficult.
"I love you, Ed," she whispered, her voice breaking. "I love you, and I need you to come back to me." She stood there for a long time, holding his hand, crying softly.
The world around her disappeared. There was no more hospital, no more nurses or monitors. Just her and Ed.
And the waiting.
_______
Olivia left the ICU feeling exhausted, as if the whole weight of the world were on her shoulders. Her legs felt weak, her heart still pounding, and her mind was a mess. She had been so focused on Ed, so desperate to see him, that until that moment she hadn't even thought about anything else. But then, as she leaned against the hallway wall, feeling slightly dizzy, reality hit her like an electric shock.
Sophie.
Carrie.
They didn't know.
Her heart sank. How could she have forgotten that? Sophie was far away, going through a difficult time, carrying a baby born of trauma. And Carrie... Carrie was Ed's mother. The woman who loved that man more than anything. She needed to know.
The brunette closed her eyes, taking a deep breath to control the wave of guilt and anxiety rising within her. Before she could reach for her phone, she felt a hand land on her shoulder.
"Liv," Cragen called softly, his fatherly expression full of concern. "You need to sit down. You look pale." She shook her head.
"No, I... I need to call Carrie. I need to tell her..." Cragen frowned and took the phone from her hands.
"Give me that number. I'll call." Olivia hesitated.
"Dad, I..."
"You're going through enough already, I'll handle it." She exhaled slowly and nodded, handing him the contact.
Cragen pulled back a little and dialed the number. He waited, listening to the endless rings on the other end until finally the call was answered.
"Olivia?" Carrie's voice sounded excited. "Took you long enough to call, huh?" Cragen cleared his throat, realizing she was clearly expecting to hear Olivia's voice.
"Ms. Tucker..." He began carefully. "This is Don Cragen. I'm Olivia's father." There was silence on the other end.
"Dad?" Carrie repeated, confused. "Olivia never mentioned you..."
"I know. It's complicated." He sighed. "But I'm calling because there's something you need to know." Her calm tone faded.
"What happened?" The man hesitated for a brief second before continuing.
"It's about Ed." Her breathing immediately changed.
"What's wrong with my son?" Carrie's voice was more tense now, thick with worry. Cragen remained calm, trying to find the right words.
"He was in a car accident a few hours ago. He's at Mercy General Hospital, he's in surgery..." The scream on the other end of the line was instantaneous.
"No! Oh my God, no!" Cragen heard a noise, as if something had fallen to the floor.
"Carrie?" he called, worried. The sound of rapid breathing was audible.
"Is... Is he alive?" Her voice came out in a whisper, filled with dread. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment before answering.
"Yes. But he hasn't woken up yet."
"Oh my God..." Carrie began to cry. "This can't be happening... How... How was this? Was he alone? Was he badly hurt?"
"He had a head injury, but the doctors did what they could. Now we have to wait." Her cries grew louder.
"My baby... My Eddie..." Cragen's chest tightened as he heard the pain in her voice.
"Carrie, I know this is scary, but he needs you to be strong right now." She sobbed.
"I need to get there. I need to be with him. With Olivia."
"I know. Come as soon as you can."
"Oh my God... My granddaughter needs to know this..." Carrie murmured, as if speaking to herself. "She's pregnant... She's been through so much... How am I going to tell her this?" He sighed.
"Take it easy. The important thing now is for you to get here safely."
"I'm going. I'm going now," Carrie said, still crying. "And Don... Thank you for calling me."
"He's a strong man, Carrie. Don't lose hope."
She didn't answer, but he heard one last sob before the line went dead. He hung up and looked at Olivia, who was watching him with teary eyes.
"Is she coming?" Her voice was weak. He nodded.
"Okay." She took a deep breath and brought her hand to her face, trying to hold back the tears. He placed his hand on her shoulder again.
"He'll be fine, Liv."
She nodded, but the truth was, she didn't know if she could believe it.
_________
The room was silent, lit only by the dim light from the bedside lamp. Sophie slept soundly, her features soft and relaxed as they rarely were these days. Pregnancy was exhausting her, and nights of sleep were the only time her body seemed to give her a break.
Carrie sat on the edge of the bed, holding her granddaughter's hands in hers, feeling the warmth of her delicate skin. She took a deep breath, trying to find the right words, trying to find a way to say this without destroying Sophie, but was there any right way to tell her that her father was on the brink of death?
"Sophie... honey, wake up."
The teenager stirred, frowning before slowly opening her eyes. She blinked a few times, adjusting her vision to the dim light in the room, until her gaze met her grandmother's.
"Grandma...?" Her voice was sleepy. "What is it?" Carrie squeezed her hands a little tighter, feeling her heart hammer.
"There's something I need to tell you, my love..." Sophie frowned, feeling a strange shiver run down her spine.
"What happened?" Her voice was fully awake now, filled with alarm. She wanted to be strong for her granddaughter, wanted to find a way to soften the blow. But how did she do that?
"It's about your father." The redhead sat up in bed immediately, her eyes wide, her body tense.
"What about my father?" Carrie swallowed hard and cupped her granddaughter's face with both hands.
"He was in an accident, my love." Sophie's world stopped.
"What?" Carrie saw her expression change before her eyes. Shock, disbelief, panic starting to build.
"Is he... is he okay?" Her voice cracked, and her chest began to rise and fall rapidly, the older woman felt her eyes fill with tears, but she kept her voice steady as much as she could.
"He's in the hospital. It was a serious accident, honey. He needed surgery." Sophie's breathing quickened.
"Surgery? Oh my God, Grandma... what happened to him? Is he... is he going to be okay?" Carrie felt her stomach churn.
"The doctors did the best they could, but now he needs to fight."
"Fight..." Sophie repeated, then covered her mouth with her hands, her whole body trembling. The older woman pulled her into a tight hug, feeling her granddaughter start to cry against her shoulder.
"No... no, no, no, this can't be happening..." Sophie sobbed, her breath catching between words. Carrie ran a hand through her hair, trying to calm her.
"I know, my love, I know..."
"I need to see him. Now." Carrie cupped her face tenderly.
"I know you want to, honey, and we will. But you need to calm down. You need to think about your baby too." Sophie pressed a hand to her stomach, as if trying to feel something.
"But... I can't stay here, Grandma. What if... what if he doesn't wake up?" The pain in the girl's voice was too much for Carrie to bear.
"Don't say that. Your father is strong, Sophie. He'll wake up."
Sophie shook her head repeatedly, her chest rising and falling with her rapid breathing.
"I can't lose him, Grandma. He's all I have..."
Carrie felt an unbearable tightness in her chest. She could handle a lot of things, except losing her son.
"You won't lose him, my love."
"Are you sure?" Sophie's voice came out a broken whisper. Carrie wanted to say yes. She wanted to promise that Ed would get through this, that he would come home, that everything would be okay.
But she couldn't. Instead, she pulled her granddaughter into another tight hug.
"We'll go to him, sweetheart. We'll stay by his side." The redhead said nothing, just hugged her grandmother tighter.
And in that moment, Carrie knew she would do anything to protect her granddaughter from that pain.