Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The day's adventure had just ended, and Zooble had taken to wandering the tent. 

Ever since the “ringmaster rabbit” incident, things had gotten significantly better. Caine actually listened to the cast now, implementing their suggestions and generally toning down the intensity of his adventures.

That didn’t mean that his creativity was being stifled. Just last week they were transported to a paper-white jungle, sectioned off for each member participating, and were given magic painbrushes to transform their little section of the forest. While clearly inspired by Gangle, the low gravity and unlimited painting potential were definitely Caine’s special touch.

The one they had just returned from was more grounded in reality: A beach day.

While Zooble had spent the time sunbathing, Gangle and Pomni had scoured the beach for the prettiest and coolest shells, bringing them to a shaded table to create jewellery. Kinger had asked Ragatha to build a sandcastle with him, and the digital nature of the sand allowed them to create a quite literal fort, one with an arched doorway and an open top that they could sit inside.

Bubble was on ‘Jax supervision duty’, where he could monitor the rabbit's chaos and give and take away item permission as necessary. He also licked sand when he didn’t think anyone was looking. The rabbit in question had opted for the thrilling activity of surfing, starting a competition with none other than Gummigoo.

Since Caine had promised to do better in the circus, Pomni had mustered up the courage to ask about bringing the gummy gator back, explaining the revelations he had had and how traumatizing it was at the time. Caine was devastatingly sorry but still hesitant to have another AI running around the circus, although in the end gave in to her wishes and brought the candy reptile back, memories fully intact. 

It was obviously a jarring experience, being brought back to life months after being snapped out of existence, greeted by the spontaneous friend and the AI ringmaster who killed you. But after some time adjusting to the chaos, being given a personal room and the ability to respawn in case something went wrong, Gummigoo settled in relatively well.

As for Jax, despite what he did to the rest of the cast, what he did to Caine, he was still brought on adventures, with sections tailored to him for his thrillseeking needs. Caine wouldn’t allow another player to abstract, no matter how much of an inconvenience or reminder of torment he was, and the others didn’t argue.

That aside, the two of them attempted to shred the waves, both of them unfamiliar with the water but comfortable enough with cartoon physics to stay on their boards. This did not save them from getting destroyed in the competition by Bubble, who practically surfed circles around them.

Bringing themselves back to the present, Zooble observed the new tent layout. Their suggestion for permanently open adventures had been partially granted, with multiple new activities around and outside the tent. The minigolf course had been moved to a more accessible section, next to an open arcade with games suggested by everyone and made by Caine.  A large art studio was made particularly for Gangle, but it included many other craft supplies, so Ragatha was also often there to sew and learn to crochet. Caine’s whimsical addition was a room with no gravity and numerous platforms on the walls, so the others could experience something similar to Caine’s flight.

Jax had his own room made specifically for him, a dark maze full of weapons and mutant mannequins for him to shoot and dismantle. As much as nobody wanted to give Jax something to enjoy, nobody wanted to figure out what alternative Jax would come up with instead to keep himself entertained. A separate murder room was the best bet.

Kinger’s pillow fort had also gotten an upgrade, with specialty gravity defying pillows allowing for a more elaborate structure. The quantum internal space now had distinct rooms, with a general lounge, a bedroom for Kinger, and an ‘insect collection’ room, which the others all avoided.

Caine had also given the chess piece a special door, one that led to the cellar. Since visiting Queenie, Kinger wanted a way to freely access the dark space, so Caine created a door that only the uncorrupted players could walk through, an invisible barrier keeping the abstractions a few meters away from the entrance to the circus. No one else ever used the door, but Kinger looked significantly more aware since it was added, so it was a net positive.

Pomni and Gummigoo didn’t have a set spot they liked to hang out, instead wandering the tent and grounds to find something to do, often ending up in the arcade, the carnival, or simply staying in Gummigoo’s badlands themed room.

Zooble had not seen Caine himself that often, besides the usual introduction and returning welcome from the adventures, but they figured he was busy with maintaining the new larger circus.

Satisfied with their musings, Zooble turned towards the art studio, curious about what Gangle was working on, content with their new normal in this digital world.

Chapter Text

Caine was not, in fact, busy with maintenance.

He wasn’t busy with anything, now that the adventure was over. 

When he had first started making changes to the circus, he was plenty busy. He had cleaned out the suggestion box, at first trying to sort the years-long pile of suggestions, pranks, mean comments and death threats before giving up and deleting the whole pile. He then installed a brand new box, in a reasonable location that the others could reach, and declared that he was now open to all new suggestions, assuming they were within reason.

Caine then had one on one meetings with each member of the circus (barring Jax) to note what each of them liked and disliked about the tent, his adventures, and their general experience in the circus. It was hard. Caine really wanted to do better, but every negative piece of feedback felt like metaphorical knives to his very being, and he was intimately familiar with what that felt like. However, with the patience of the cast, he was able to update his understanding of what humans really liked, what they needed to stay sane.

And he really did. His first adventure after the mandatory break was a breath of fresh air, literally, when he introduced them to the newly updated digital lake, with actual activities besides the slide and ‘drowning’. Fishing boats with realistic fishing mechanics, accurate rock skipping physics, even an automatic water skiing slash tubing course that could tow players around without needing an actual boat to pull them. It was the perfect combination of excitement and relaxation.

That being said, adventures were no longer every day, but instead every second day, giving everyone a break to do whatever they wished on their own schedule. That’s where the more permanent activity suggestions came into play.

Creating the arcade was relatively easy for the AI, as each game was like a significantly simpler adventure, and he didn’t have to worry about anyone getting injured. Jax’s special murder maze was just a miniature, replayable adventure. Everything else was mostly just creating relevant mechanics or updating existing structures.

Any change to the main circus grounds also required a lot of system maintenance and modification. The grounds were large enough as is, adding anything extra without precaution could cause lag or bugs (and not the kind Kinger liked), so Caine had to update and change a lot to make sure the circus still ran optimally with all the additions. This is what took up most of his time when not building or running adventures.

But now, months later… there was nothing left to do. He had updated all he possibly could in the main circus map, added everyone’s (reasonable) suggestions. He had even learned how to make and run the most realistic graphics possible while not tanking the processes running the game, should they be requested.

All he had left to do was make adventures and run them.

This, obviously, did not take up much of his time. On days off, he would create the next adventure, polish it beyond perfection, and test it rigorously. On days on, he would simply watch, making sure nothing went awry, enjoying the smiles of his troupe. 

But the time in between was empty.

That was a good way to describe how he felt: empty. He was happy, of course, that his players were actually enjoying themselves, but the sentiment started to feel hollow after a while.

He had almost asked, once, if he could join the cast on an adventure. To feel that sense of joy he had felt fleetingly when grounded with the others. But something stopped him.

They had dealt with his nonsense long enough, and they were finally happy. No sense ruining it with his presence.

All that bringing him to the now, where he floated in a room with a blue wireframe floor acting like a mimicry of tile, a dark skybox blocking out the surrounding void. A calm solitude, a separate map, where he could create and test new models without the interruption of the circus’s usual visual chaos.

There were no models for him to create and test now. The day’s adventure had already concluded, there were no suggestions in the box, and he wouldn’t start working on the next adventure until tomorrow.

If he worked on it now… there would be nothing to do tomorrow…

He sighed, settling on the unfinished floor. While visually it was mostly invisible, the collisions were still fully functional. Necessary for testing.

A subtle, stinging cold bloomed from within the depths of his code, intensifying slowly. Familiar but impossible to pinpoint, a new constant since he found himself in this repeating emptiness. 

It wasn’t a bug or glitch; he had already spent hours combing his program to try and find what caused the sensation. It wasn’t a true temperature change either. It was an unknown. 

And nothing seemed to fix it. Not blankets, not turning up the digital heat, nothing.

Nothing he had tried so far, at least.

He had one last, desperate option to try.

One last thing that caused burning.

Trembling subtly, he summoned a knife, the same kind as the target trick. The same kind that had already pierced him repeatedly. The same kind that caused virtual fire to flood beneath his digital skin.

Of course, the blade wouldn’t work, not with the artificial blood turned off. Experimentally, he pressed the sharp edge to his arm, but just as he thought, it only registered as an uncomfortable pressure.

He promised he wouldn't turn that toggle back on. He said it was gone permanently. He wouldn’t allow the others to get hurt.

However, he had fibbed a little, back when he regained control of the circus. He hated deleting functional code.

Code that he could edit.

Placing the knife down beside him and opening a coding window, he quickly found the function in question. It didn’t take him long to modify it to only interact with his character profile. 

Taking a steadying breath, he closed the window, picking up the knife once again. He hesitated, uncertain if this was a good idea, but the crystallising chill intensified, prompting him to bring the blade to his arm.

The sensation pierced him far more sharply than expected, causing him to drop the knife and press his hand to the wound, black blood smearing on his sleeve and glove. It burned, fire crawling up his arm and mingling harshly with the ice in his artificial veins, before overwhelming it with unbearable heat.

It… it worked.

He felt more present all of a sudden, more aware, like the cut had pulled him from the depths of some terrible, frozen abyss. He slowly lifted his hand from the wound, revealing the sluggishly bleeding injury.

He heard a pop behind him, and in an instance of panic, he snapped his fingers, gloves slipping uncomfortably due to the blood.

The knife disappeared, the wound closed and the black liquid vanished. Just in time, as Bubble had popped in unannounced.

“Hiya boss!!” Bubble exclaimed, aerial rolling over to Caine. The flustered ringmaster turned towards him, hands fidgeting nervously.

“Bubble! What brings you here?” Caine replied brightly, his cheerful mask up immediately.

“Jax is in his murder room, and I got tired of biting mannequins." Bubble explained, ever mischievous grin widening slightly. “I wanted to see what you were up to!”

Caine glanced around at the empty space. “Uh… thinking, I guess.”

“Thinking about whaaaaaat?” Bubble asked, floating around Caine.

Caine followed Bubble as he circled, head rotating while his body remained in place. He reached out and blocked Bubble’s path with a hand, the sphere bouncing off while giggling.

“Nothing important.” Caine finally replied, crossing his arms. “Why don’t you go do… whatever you do… when… now.” 

“I’m going to go chew on the curtains!” Bubble declared, before disappearing with a self-inflicted pop.

Caine sighed, slumping now that he was alone. Oh Bubble, such a simple creature. Or maybe the spherical menace was on to something… maybe chewing a curtain would help. It’s not like Caine had ever tried.

He sighed again, heavier this time. 

It was going to be a long day.

It always was.

Chapter Text

Bubble wasn’t what most would call a very conscious being.

Before “the incident”, Bubble didn’t really get up to much. He would help with introducing the adventures, cause a bit of chaos, but otherwise just sort of vibed. And he was happy with that, he didn’t need much in this world to be content.

Even now, with the responsibility of keeping an eye on Jax, he still just coasted along, enjoying the variety of the adventures.

What he was, despite this, was observant. Especially advantageous when most didn’t notice he was there, or brushed off his presence.

And Bubble had noticed that Caine was acting strange.

The immediate aftermath of “the incident” was, surprisingly, not that odd. Caine still had a lot to work on even outside the less frequent adventures. As time went on, however, he became more… spacey, when not working on anything. He also didn’t spend as much time near the cast as expected, when not asking them for suggestions.

The changes had become particularly obvious and concerning after the beach adventure. First Caine brushed him off, which wasn’t that uncommon, but the circumstances surrounding it were strange. It was as if Caine was hiding something from him.

He was also hiding from him. Not that he could hide forever, Bubble could either take the time to locate him through the code, or brute force search for him by teleporting everywhere Caine liked to hang out. When found, he would act flustered, like he had been caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to, although he would always disappear anything before Bubble could see.

Even stranger was how Caine acted in front of the troupe. While he was always over dramatic when presenting adventures, his actions were extra exaggerated, as if overcompensating for something. When he thought the others weren’t looking, he would be uncannily still, gripping his forearms with the opposite hand.

Since Caine was clearly not going to say anything, Bubble was instead going to ask what the others have seen. It may not lead anywhere, but at least he could have more eyes on the situation.

Thankfully for him, everyone was in the kitchen/dining area enjoying the day's breakfast. A perfect opportunity for questioning. 

And mischief. 

Sneaking up behind the group, Bubble swooped in, devouring the entire stack of pancakes that were piled on Kinger’s plate and having to dodge the fork and knife mindlessly poked in his direction. 

Popping wouldn’t normally be a problem, but he was on a mission.

He got a mixed bag of looks from everyone, from surprised to annoyed to missing their breakfast. “Bubble, why did you do that?” Ragatha asked, her kind facade thin against the sphere of chaos, while Jax just cackled.

“I have an important question!” Bubble exclaimed, spinning whimsically while summoning a new plate of pancakes for Kinger.

Resisting the urge for more trouble in the face of a serious matter, Bubble continued, “Have any of you noticed Caine acting strange?”

Most of the group looked taken aback, a confused silence falling over them for a moment.

“Not… particularly.” Pomni said hesitantly, and the others nodded in agreement

“Do you think he’s acting strange?” Zooble asked.

“Absolutely!” Bubble nodded his entire body. “He’s been… spacey! Less enthusiastic! And his adventure introductions are overly dramatic!”

“Aren’t his adventure introductions always dramatic?”

Bubble rolled his whole head in exasperation. “Well, yes, but it’s extra forced now! None of the heart, all of the showmanship!”

Jax looked up from his pancakes, a syrupy grin creeping across his face. “The teeth man’s being dramatic and not acting like himself? I know how to get him back into shape.”

Bubble turned slowly to face Jax, eyes blank with a fury that made even the rabbit's perpetual smile twitch with uncertainty. Only for that smile to disappear entirely when the chair beneath him stopped interacting with his model, dropping him unceremoniously to the floor. Jax stood quickly, brushing himself off and ignoring the sharp toothed stare following him as he began walking towards the stage, hands in his pockets.

The awkward conversation detour was interrupted by Ragatha, who continued as if nothing happened. “I haven’t noticed any difference with Caine… but we can keep an eye out for it, right guys?”

The others nodded their agreement. The adventure of the day was going to start soon, it was a perfect opportunity to try and spot what Bubble was talking about.

As if summoned by the thought, Caine appeared above the table with a burst of confetti, the decorative paper politely disappearing before they stuck to the remaining pancakes.

“Good morning, my beautiful balloons!! I hope you are ready for another amazing adventure!” Caine exclaimed, spinning excitedly in the air. He froze when his eyes locked on Bubble. “What are you doing here without… Jax?”

“Partaking in pancake piracy!” Bubble said, his tongue shooting out like a frog’s and yoinking Gummigoo’s last pancake.

Gummigoo only slightly flinched. He’d been there long enough to get used to Bubble’s antics.

Caine stared at Bubble blankly, before popping him without fanfare. “Anyway! Meet me at the stage for the introduction!” He said quickly, disappearing in an exact reverse of his entrance, imploding confetti and all.

No better time than now. The troupe left the table, moving apprehensively towards the stage. Caine had a good track record as of late for fun adventures, but everyone was focused on the presumed strangeness Bubble was talking about.

The ringmaster waited for them with a jittering patience, floating above the stage with his hands on his hips. He was floating a little higher than usual, but that was easily explained by the purple figure leaning on the stage beneath him. As they got closer, Zooble noticed the index finger on Caine's left hand tapping at his hip rapidly. Nothing too unusual, but it could be a sign of stress.

“I hope you are all prepared,” Caine started, twirling his gold topped cane, “for the SUBLIME ZIP LINE! Travel through interdimensional portals and take in otherworldly sights as you soar on the certified safe zip line track!” He held his cane above his head as thought it was a rope, zipping out of sight before appearing from behind the curtain. 

He dropped slightly closer to the group, now holding the baton like a gun, “And for those looking for a thrill: a separate, identical track is being attacked by dangerous creatures from each dimension, and you must take them out using our super futuristic laser weaponry!!”

The presentation didn’t look any different than usual to Zooble. Same theatrics as usual, nothing out of place. Maybe Bubble was just messing with them.

Gummigoo was looking at Pomni, a slightly sheepish expression on his malleable face. “I hope you don’t mind if I take the violent route, I've been itching to do some gun slinging.”

“Oh! No, go ahead, have fun! We’ll meet up at the end.” Pomni responded lightly.

“I think I’m going to skip out on this one.”

Caine’s head snapped in Zooble’s direction, eyes wide, startling the amalgam. He stayed frozen in place for a moment, staring silently, before he finally spoke in a strained voice. “You-... you're skipping the adventure?”

Zooble shrugged, but internally scrutinized the man above them. “Yeah, I’m a little worried I’d lose my limbs partway through…”–Caine could probably do something about that–“...and besides, I wouldn’t mind a break.”

Caine straightened his posture, clutching his cane tighter. His eye twitched. “Right, a break. That is… perfectly acceptable! Not a problem at all! This is the first adventure you have skipped in months, which by all accounts is impressive! So a break is not unexpected at this point!”

Despite his words, Caine was clearly struggling with the idea. Zooble knew how much he hated them skipping his adventures in the past, but they thought he might have gotten better about it now that adventures weren’t every day regardless.

Zooble thought to press more, but was interrupted by Jax. 

“God, can we get going already? If we keep chit-chatting for any longer I might abstract on the spot.” 

The sly grin never left the rabbit's face, but the look of sudden terror from Caine was hard to miss.

“RIGHT! Yes!” Caine exclaimed loudly, rapidly spawning a swirling blue and green portal ahead of the troupe and releasing Bubble from his hat in one smooth swoop. “Separate paths are available in the first room! Everyone in, off you go!!” He flew around their heads like an overeager honeybee as they passed through the portal, looking like he very much wanted to push the group despite his promise to no longer do that.

As soon as the portal closed, Caine took one glance at Zooble before teleporting away.

That was… odd, but Zooble couldn't think of anything in that interaction that was out of place. Caine was as exuberant as ever; while he did seem displeased, maybe even distressed, at Zooble skipping the adventure, it was comparatively reasonable given how he used to act; and while the look of fear was overall concerning, it wasn't surprising considering Jax threatened him with abstraction.

Zooble let out a short huff of frustration. They wanted to brush off Bubble’s warning, but the round AI was the most familiar with Caine, and despite all his aloof shenanigans he clearly cared about the ringmaster.

Nothing more they could do about it right now. 

______________

The serene peace of the coding space was interrupted by the violent warping of the virtual air, Caine immediately falling to the gridded floor. He landed hard on his knees, one hand splayed on the ground to steady himself and the other clutching at his chest as he gasped for breath he didn’t need.

Zooble skipped his adventure. They hadn’t skipped in months. He thought he was doing better.

It was so cold, it pierced him from his very core through everything.

What did he do wrong? He didn’t think his idea was that frightening or dangerous. He didn’t think anything would be able to take or shake off Zooble’s limbs, but they would know better than him.

It spread through him like cracks in glass, crawling up his arms and digging into his digital skin.

His hands shook, pixels flicking off his model like angry sparks as he began to glitch from stress, and he struggled to snap his fingers. It took him a couple attempts to summon the knife, and he nearly considered biting himself instead in his desperation for relief.

It hurt so much it was so cold it was FREEZING.

He dug the blade into his arm, gasping in pain and relief as fiery agony raced under his skin, overwhelming the icy ache. He closed his eyes, his whole body shaking with exhaustion as the cold slowly dispersed.

Only for it to grow in strength once again, pushing back against the fire, bringing back the cold cold cold cold COLD.

Why didn’t it work? 

It hadn’t failed him before.

Why now?

In a flurry of desperate urgency, Caine swapped the hand the knife was in and cut into his other arm, hoping hoping hoping that it would be enough to quell the crystallising chill overpowering the first wound.

Blessedly, the second injury was enough, burning away the remaining cold that the first couldn’t beat, the static around his body finally ceasing.

Dropping the knife and wrapping his arms around his chest, Caine sobbed dryly.

He was fine.

He was okay.

…He needed to get a better handle on his emotions, there was no reason to react the way he did because of Zooble skipping an adventure. They were allowed to. It didn’t mean anything bad…

…right?

No, stop thinking about it.

Oh god, he forgot about the adventure.

Closing his teeth and accessing one of his all seeing eyes, he peered in on the troupe who were actively on the zip line, watching them fly across the colourful expanse of one of the dimensions.

The casual group was ahead of the violent group, currently gliding across a winter wonderland, hands outstretched in awe as they tried to touch the auroras shimmering next to them.

Swapping eyes, the gun wielding duo were in the previous room, battling a horde of insectoid aliens on a martian-like planet, muzzle flashes sparking like stars across the scarlet rocks, bedazzling the landscape further against the sparkling galaxy above them.

Good, everything seemed to be going well. Caine knew he could check on Zooble, assuming they weren’t in their room, but… he didn’t want to.

They were fine. He didn’t need to check.

Bringing his vision back to himself, he looked down at his aching arms, which were still bleeding sluggishly, leaving an asymmetrical dark puddle at his knees.

The cold was gone, so Caine snapped his fingers, erasing the wounds and clearing the black liquid. He took a deep, grounding breath as he pushed himself to his feet. He wanted to move somewhere more comfortable to watch the rest of the adventure. 

Before he could teleport away, a familiar feeling crept outwards from his core, stinging subtly.

No…

No.

NO!

How was the cold back already? 

He should have more time!

No, it was fine, it wasn’t that bad yet and the sensation was growing slowly. 

He could ignore it, and only when it became too intense to bear would he do something about it.

Everything was fine.

Chapter Text

Zooble hadn’t seen Caine since they skipped the adventure.

They had missed him opening the portal to return the rest of the group to the circus, and the ringmaster had been absent for the entirety of the day off.

Which was completely normal, and had been that way since he had started running staggered adventures, but ever since Bubble had brought up Caine acting strange, Zooble couldn’t help but wonder if it was a bad thing.

No one else had seen anything either, and told them that he seemed normal when he brought them back.

Except for Bubble, who said Caine looked tense.

Thankfully for Zooble’s sanity, they had a plan.

In the meantime though, the troupe was enjoying the day's breakfast. Bubble, as usual, was supervising Jax, and by supervising they meant sniping bacon from his plate when he wasn’t looking.

Caine didn’t interrupt this time, so once food was done, the troupe made their way to the stage, chatting happily.

The ringmaster floated above the stage, grinning down at them cheerfully.

“Who’s ready for the day's adventure!” Caine exclaimed, putting his hands on his hips. “Because today you are visiting the VERIDIAN VALLEY for a wonderful camping trip! With multiple vibrant hiking trails, a lake for swimming, river rapids kayaking, and individual tents for the optional overnight stay! And that’s just the beginning!”

The perfect opportunity for Zooble’s plan.

Spawning the soft green portal with a flick of his wrist, Caine gestured at it eagerly, eyes on Zooble.

“Caine, do you want to join us on this one?”

Everyone stopped in their tracks, looking back at the amalgam in muted surprise. Caine looked particularly taken aback, pupils pinpricks as he stared wide eyed at them.

“You… you want me to join you on the adventure?” He asked, voice thin, hands creeping up to grasp at his forearms.

Zooble shrugged nonchalantly, noting his reaction with scrutiny. “Sure, why not.”

Caine stuttered for a second, hands gesturing nonsensically, before his pupils dilated. “I… yes! Yes, I would love to join you!” He practically shot to the ground, settling gently on his feet a reasonably unsuspicious distance from Jax.

With that, Caine urged the troupe forward into the portal.

They were met with a gorgeous lake sparkling in front of them, surrounded by lush greenery and towering mountains peaked with snow. A campsite lay in a clear patch in front of the water, a circle of stones pre-filled with logs and sticks. There were no tents currently up, but there were numerous coloured boxes stacked to the side that had ‘Caine’s insta-tent!’ lettered on the side.

Jax made a beeline for the kayaks, Bubble floating dutifully behind him to help set up. Kinger mentioned something about rock skipping, which Gangle and Pomni immediately started pestering him about, and Ragatha eyed the start of the hiking path.

“Who wants to join me on the hiking trail?” She asked lightly, looking to those who hadn’t wandered off already.

“A walkabout would be pretty nice.” Gummigoo said, crossing his arms.

Zooble just shrugged. They were waiting to see what Caine did.

“Absolutely! It’s been a while since I’ve used my legs properly!”

It was certainly an odd group, but conversation started up quickly… well, between Ragatha and Gummigoo at least. They talked about their experiences in nature, Ragatha bringing up pieces of her life before the circus and Gummigoo reminiscing on his false memories. Caine simply opted to listen, trailing behind the group, and Zooble kept a subtle eye on him.

Why was he being so quiet? Zooble would have expected him to be yapping about the work he did on the map, or the inspirations he took. Not silently following like a bedazzled ghost. Knowing Caine, though, if Zooble brought it up, he would just make some sort of excuse. 

This left Zooble frustrated. It was clear now that something was wrong with the ringmaster, but how were they supposed to figure out what? No wonder Bubble had asked everyone for help.

As they continued up the trail, the foliage got denser, creeping onto the path. The group sidestepped it at first, but the occasional larger plant had to be pushed aside. A particularly obtrusive branch was held open like a door by Ragatha, passed to Gummigoo, then to Zooble, who held it for long enough that they expected Caine to catch it.

Only to startle when they heard a leafy smacking sound followed by a high-pitched squawk.

Everyone turned to see Caine holding a hand over his closed jaw, reeling from the impact. He squinted one side of his teeth open, then the other, wincing.

His eye.

Was bleeding.

Ragatha gasped, hands flying to her mouth in horror, while Gummigoo's eyes just widened in surprise and confusion. Zooble took initiative.

This was much more dire than expected.

“Caine?” They said, approaching him carefully. “Why is your eye bleeding?”

Caine’s eyes snapped wider with obvious fear, another painful wince wracking his body. He moved his jaw as if to speak, but no sound came out, only the increasingly rapid panting of panic.

Before Zooble could press further, Caine snapped his fingers desperately and disappeared.

[&$#!].

Damn their blunt nature.

“C’mon, we gotta tell Bubble.”

______________

No no no no no no no.

They knew.

He wasn’t paying attention, and now they knew.

They would be mad. He made a promise.

He broke his promise.

Caine kneeled on the ground of the coding space, clutching his eye so tightly he was afraid it might pop from the pressure.

It paradoxically burned with cold, the pain an unbearable mix that made rational thought impossible, the only thing he could think being make it stop.

The ice pulsed from both his eye and core, overwhelming everything and causing his body to start glitching.

He managed to will himself to pry his hand off of his eye, not even bothering to fix the aching orb before summoning a knife with shaking fingers.

Digging the blade into his arm, he whined in panic when instead of the expected, relieving heat, all he felt was more cold.

Why why why why why, why was it still cold?

Leaving a few more cuts before attacking his other arm, his model warped with static, the freezing only growing in intensity as his injuries grew.

No no no what was wrong? Why was this happening? 

In a last ditch attempt of desperation, Caine plunged the knife into his chest, into his core, hoping begging praying that it would do anything.

But all it accomplished was weakening him further, and as he pulled the knife from his digital flesh, the world tilted as he slumped onto his side. The slowly pooling blood soaked into his coat, uncomfortably sticky against his skin.

He shivered violently as the polygons of his model began to stretch and warp. It hurt.

It hurt so bad.

What was…

Oh.

He remembered what the cold was now.

He didn’t realize he could abstract, but now that the glitchy transformation was fully taking hold it was obvious that that was what was happening.

While part of him was still terrified, the other part had resigned to his fate, worrying only about his troupe, the players under his now crumpling care.

They would be fine, he thought, as his vision began to grow fuzzy. He’d made enough adventures to loop without getting stale, even just over the few months of improved work, and while Bubble couldn’t make new adventures, he could run old ones.

They didn’t really need him anymore.

As a bonus, they wouldn't even have to deal with his abstracted self, seeing as he had entombed himself in the testing map.

He just wished it didn’t hurt so much.

Chapter Text

It was a frantic scuffle down the trail.

Zooble was already unbalanced on their limbs on flat ground, but the uneven terrain was making this much harder. Despite this, they kept pace reasonably with the other two as they flew through the forest.

They crashed back into the main campsite, startling the trio currently attempting to haul a canoe to the lake, Kinger jumping nearly a foot in the air. 

“Where’s Bubble?” Ragatha asked urgently as the returning crew scanned the area.

“Uh, he just left with Jax for another lap of the rapids.” Pomni replied apprehensively.

Before anyone could respond, Gummigoo bolted for the water, diving in without further explanation and swimming for the rapids.

Pomni stared where the gator had disappeared, while Gangle ran up to Zooble. “What’s going on?”

“Caine got hit by a branch… and started bleeding.” Zooble explained breathlessly. Why they got tired in a virtual space they would never understand.

“What?! But… Caine deleted that setting, didn’t he?” Pomni turned in a panic, her shoulders hunched.

“Well, let's test it!” Kinger declared, picking up a marshmallow roasting stick and, before anyone could protest, stabbing his other hand.

The others all shouted in horror, but that quickly turned to confusion when, other than the metal prongs sticking through his hand, nothing happened.

Confusion turned to dread when they all realized what that meant.

The tense silence was thankfully interrupted when a panicked Bubble, annoyed Jax, and thoroughly exhausted Gummigoo appeared next to them.

Pomni rushed the candy croc in worry, fretting over the chunks taken out of his gelatinous body. “Why did you do that?”

Gummigoo gave her a wobbly smile, slowly sitting on the ground. “I may be made of candy and lived in a desert, but I’m still a gator. I can swim with the best of them.”

Bubble, meanwhile, rushed towards Zooble. “What happened?”

“Caine got hit by a branch and started bleeding from his eye.” Zooble explained again, crossing their arms anxiously. “He teleported away before we could do anything.”

Bubble nodded seriously. “I’ll be back.” He then popped himself.

Zooble sighed. All this explaining and waiting was going to kill them.

“So, Dentures turned the blood back on?” Jax drawled, a strange smile stretching across his face. He seemed to note the metal stick still stuck harmlessly in Kinger's hand. “But only for himself? Isn’t that interesting…”

“Not now, Jax.” Ragatha growled, an unusual sound from the doll. Tension was too high for the rabbit’s nonsense.

Bubble reappeared abruptly, biting Zooble’s arm without preamble. Zooble was about to shout at him, but their breath was stolen when they suddenly teleported.

Appearing in a dark void, Zooble stumbled from the unexpected change in location, shaking off the dizziness as soon as they could.

“What the [$%@#]!” They snapped, flinching as the world around them warped and rumbled with static. “Why me?!”

“Because you are the only one who seemed to listen to me about Caine.” Bubble said, zipping around their head. “He’s over here, quick!”

Turning to where Bubble was gesturing, Zooble gasped in horror.

Strewn out across the ground, glitchy and fuzzy around the edges, was Caine. A shiny puddle of black pooled around him, and dark spikes rippled across his body.

“Caine!” Zooble rushed over, skidding to their knees next to his limp form. “Caine, what happened? What’s happening?”

Caine’s eyes opened, and oh god it was bad. One eye still had cuts from the branch, and was a strange squashed shape like someone had squeezed it. Both orbs were rippling with bright colours, his gaze unfocused.

Zooble carefully surveyed his condition. Aside from the glitching and strange geometry, he had numerous wounds across his body, cuts in his arms and a large gash in his chest. And lying next to him, obscured by blood, was a knife.

“Did you… do this to yourself?” Zooble asked softly, hesitantly reaching out to the fallen ringmaster.

Caine blinked slowly, focusing on Zooble’s face. “Z… Zoob..?” The effort to speak caused him to wince, another glitch washing over him.

The world around them reacted in turn, a digital earthquake warping the crisscrossed blue lines of the floor.

Zooble’s eyes widened. “[%$@&], don’t speak. It’s okay.”

It wasn’t. They weren’t sure what to do. Caine was not only wounded, but appeared to be abstracting. They didn’t even realize he could abstract.

Out of ideas and likely running out of time, Zooble bit the bullet and scooped Caine into their arms.

Caine whined as he was moved, the glitching getting more violent for a moment.

Zooble held back a noise of their own, the glitching creeping up their arms, blood smearing onto their body, but they didn’t dare let go. “It’s okay, you’re safe, I’m not going to leave you.”

Caine mumbled something incomprehensible, shivering intermittently. More black spikes formed on his shoulder, a wayward eye blinking open before the spikes dissolved.

Zooble flinched. It was getting worse. They squeezed their arms tighter around the distressed AI, rocking slowly. “C’mon, Caine, stay with me.”

“Mmmmmmph, d-don’t… nnnneed.” Caine slurred, his hands slowly reaching to push away from Zooble, but all he managed was draping his arms over their shoulders.

Zooble’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t need what?”

“Me.” Caine squeaked, his form flickering violently for a second. 

“What?” Zooble looked down at him in confusion. Don’t need him? Did he think…

Their thought process was interrupted by a soft sob. Caine’s eyes were beginning to water, pixelated tears dripping from his teeth. Zooble wasn’t sure if the liquid qualified as tears or drool, but now was not the time to think about it.

“Caine, of course we need you.” They assured him quietly, cupping his bottom jaw with a hand and tilting his face to look at them.

“N-no…” Caine closed his teeth, trembling lightly.

“Okay, maybe need is the wrong word. We want you here.” Zooble corrected quickly. “We want you to hang out with us, to join us on adventures. You don’t have to be useful to us, you just have to be.”

That seemed to take Caine by surprise, his eyes snapping back open and locking onto Zooble. He shivered for a second, model staticky, before the glitching appeared to settle to a slight fuzz.

“You… you do?” He asked softly, pupils dilated, his eye colour stabilizing into the familiar green and blue.

“Of course.” Zooble smiled with their eyes, but their heart hurt. Did Caine think he couldn’t join them? “I’m sorry we didn’t make that clear to you.” 

Caine’s model stabilised, edges smoothing back to normal, and the glitching floor beneath them also calmed. He was still trembling, but that was likely a consequence of adrenaline or the still leaking wounds.

Zooble’s arms were also still glitching, but they opted to ignore it until Caine was completely better, physically at least.

“Can you fix yourself?” Zooble asked, gently lifting one of his arms.

Without looking, Caine snapped his fingers, the injuries disappearing, his squashed eye returned to normal and the blood cleared away. Zooble was surprised to find their arms fixed as well, but they weren’t about to question it.

Looking up from the shaking ringmaster, Zooble locked eyes with Bubble, who was hovering above them nervously.

“Can you bring us to Kinger’s pillow fort?” Zooble asked quietly, securing their hold on Caine. “And then bring the others back from the adventure?”

“I’m on it.” Bubble said softly, more serious than Zooble had ever heard.

Another dizzying jump through space, and Zooble found themselves in lounge of the pillow fort, dropping into a pile of comforters. 

Caine clung to them now, arms wrapped tightly around their back, still trembling subtly.

Zooble felt exhaustion settle over their shoulders. They couldn’t believe this had happened, was happening, but at least they had caught it just in time.

They were notified of the cast's return as Kinger politely burst into the pillow fort, expertly removing and re-placing the pillows of the door.

“Is he alright?” Kinger asked quietly, tilting his head as he settled in the pillows beside them.

“He’s… better.” Zooble settled on. “Do you mind taking him? I’m… you’re probably more comfortable to hug.” They opted not to say they were getting uncomfortable with Caine clinging to them. He didn’t need to hear that now.

“I can.” Kinger moved closer, reaching for the shaking ringmaster. “Come here, Caine.”

While Zooble gently pried the AI off of them, Kinger took Caine’s shoulder and maneuvered him into his nonexistent arms. Caine resisted at first, but once he was in Kinger’s lap he clung even harder to the chess piece's robe, shoving his face into the fluff.

Zooble took a relieved breath, slouching further into the comforters.

It was going to be a long talk, they could just tell.

Chapter Text

“Caine…” Zooble started slowly, softly. “What… caused this?”

Caine glanced at them, but before he could speak, Zooble added “And don’t say it was nothing. You were abstracting. You clearly need help.”

“And we can only help if you tell us whats wrong.” Kinger added, gently rubbing a thumb over the AI’s shoulder.

Caine sighed, pulling his face from the fluff of Kinger’s cloak. “It… well, was a number of things, all piling up. I don’t really know where to start.”

“Start at the beginning.” Kinger said simply.

A pause. “It… wasn’t what Jax did. Not directly, at least. After I retook control of the circus things weren’t so bad, actually.” He released one hand from Kinger’s robe to gesture as he spoke. “I had a lot to work on: suggestions, updates, adventures… “

He trailed off, looking at the ground. “But once all that was done, all that was left was the adventures, and those… don’t take me very long to make, with as much practice as I have. So I had a lot of free time… free time where I was… alone… That’s when it seemed to start.”

Zooble narrowed their eyes at him sympathetically. “Why didn’t you come to any of us?”

“I didn’t want to burden you.” Caine answered quickly. “You… you were finally happy! And I’m the ringmaster! I’m supposed to be able to solve things myself.”

“You don’t always have to be the ringmaster.” Kinger said softly, gently plucking the hat from above Caine’s head, setting it down on a pillow beside them. “Sometimes you can just be our friend.”

“And you aren’t a burden, Caine.” Zooble added. “You’ve done so much for everyone. We will help you in return.”

“Even if you can do nothing, we will still be here.” Kinger continued. “It’s like we said before: you don't have to do this alone.”

Tears welled up in Caine’s eyes, and he closed his teeth over them for a moment until they went away.

“A-anyway.” Caine continued, voice shaky. “You know how when your model glitches out, like from touching an abstraction, it feels cold?”

Zooble tilted their head. “I’ve… never heard that, I’ve always heard it feels numb, like pins and needles.”

Caine looked away. “I… don’t know what that feels like.”

“I’m guessing your programming approximated that feeling as cold, as something you understand.” Kinger said.

“I suppose that would make sense.” Caine conceded. “Especially since normal methods didn’t make me feel any warmer. But…”

He took a moment to take a deep breath, looking down at his arm. “Physical pain, with the blood toggle on… feels like burning.”

The already high tension in the pillow fort only grew thicker as the human players registered what that meant. Kinger held Caine slightly closer, and Zooble crossed their arms in discomfort.

“I made sure that the blood toggle code only affected me. And… It wasn’t too bad at first. I would feel cold, injure myself to get rid of it, fix myself, then move on with my day.” Caine explained, far too casually. “But it started to get worse after…”

He paused again, but this silence was more charged as he looked up at Zooble nervously.

“It was when I skipped the adventure, wasn’t it.”

Zooble knew they had hit the nail on the head when Caine flinched, stumbling to explain himself.

“It was fine! I didn’t- I wasn’t going to force you to go on an adventure, I just… didn’t handle it as well as I should have.”

“It’s okay, I’m not mad, I get it.” Zooble assured him. “You said it got worse?”

“Um, yeah. The wounds worked, but… once I healed myself, the cold came back. Slowly, so it was manageable, but… I was scared.”

Leaning against Kinger as he continued, Caine got quieter again. “It almost got better, when you invited me on the adventure, but then I got hit by the branch and you saw the blood, and- and I thought you would be mad because I said I got rid of it and I broke my promise and the cold wouldn’t stop-”

“Caine.” Kinger interrupted firmly, stopping the ringmaster from spiralling. Caine took a few deep breaths, wilting in embarrassment.

“We weren’t mad, Caine. We were scared. For you.” Zooble said, leaning forward to convey how serious they were.

“You… were?” Caine asked timidly, barely peeking out from between his teeth.

“Of course.” Zooble said. They noticed the parallel to earlier, and had to shake off the fear of watching Caine abstract. He was fine now. They could help. “Now, you need to get rid of the blood code. For real this time.”

Caine froze, remaining silent for a moment. Then, he spoke, nearly under his breath. “...what if the cold comes back?”

“Then we’ll find another solution.” Kinger replied just as softly.

Looking at his fingers with reluctant consideration, Caine finally snapped them quietly. There was no physical indicator that the deed was done, but the devastated look on his face was proof enough.

“I think someone should be around you from now on, until we know you can safely be alone.” Kinger suggested, patting Caine on the head.

“I- that’s not necessary! I’m-”

“Caine.” It was Zooble’s turn to interrupt. “You aren’t a burden. We will figure this out, okay?”

He just nodded sheepishly in response. After a beat, he snapped the fingers of his free hand, and his red jacket disappeared.

“Caine?” Both Kinger and Zooble exclaimed softly at the same time, surprised and confused.

“I… thought that maybe if I remove the jacket when I’m not doing ringmaster things, it would… physically remind me of what you said. That I’m also your friend” Caine explained, ducking his head. “It’s.. it’s stupid, never mind, I’ll-”

“I don’t think it’s stupid. If it’s helpful to you, then it’s not stupid.” Zooble cut in again. They stood carefully, trying not to trip on the nest of comforters that had formed around them. “I’m going to inform the others that everything is… alright now.”

Kinger nodded, readjusting his comforting hold on Caine. “I will stay here as long as you need, Caine. We can see the others when you are ready.”

Caine simply nodded, his upper jaw drooping with exhaustion as he buried his face into Kinger’s robe once more.

Zooble crept to the exit of the pillow fort, cautiously moving the designated ‘door’ cushions and slipping outside.

Everyone else, sans purple rabbit and sharp-toothed orb, were hovering outside the fort anxiously, waiting to receive any news. As Zooble emerged, they all practically swarmed them.

“Is Caine okay?” Ragatha asked quickly, the expressions on everyone else's faces conveying the same question.

“He’s okay now.” Zooble said first, trying to ease the palpable panic. It wasn’t very effective. They walked further from the pillow fort in an attempt to pull the group away, the others following.  “He… he was abstracting.”

“He WHAT?” They all cried out at the same time.

“Why? How?” Pomni continued, pupils noticeably small.

“Hey, it's okay, we caught him in time and he’s doing better.” Zooble said calmly.

“How… how did this happen?” Gangle asked quietly, wringing her ribbon hands together as tears dripped from beneath her comedy mask.

“And why was he bleeding?” Ragatha added, equally distressed.

“I’ll explain in more detail later, but long story short: He felt lonely when he ran out of work to do, the loneliness manifested as feeling cold, the physical wounds felt hot… but it stopped helping after a while.”

Ragatha gasped, hands over her mouth. “Is there anything we can do to help?”

Zooble nodded. “We shouldn’t leave him alone until we know he’s really better.”

They all nodded in return, Pomni piping up. “We can take shifts if we have to, I’m… assuming he doesn’t sleep… Or does he?”

Zooble hadn’t considered that. Oh well. “We’ll figure it out later.”

“I’ll stay with him first.” Gangle said firmly, pulling attention to herself. “A-after Kinger, I mean. I know he enjoyed drawing, we can draw together. And I can give him his sketch from the last time.”

“I can join you in the art room!” Ragatha added. “Unless you think we should all hang out with him separately?”

“No, do what you want. We can figure out logistics later if we need to.” Zooble said. “But for now, I’m having a nap.”

No one protested, and so the group hesitantly dispersed, Zooble to their room, Pomni and Gummigoo to who knows where, and Gangle and Ragatha to sit in front of the pillow fort, waiting for their ringmaster to emerge.

______________

The silence in the pillow fort was all encompassing.

It wasn’t as suffocating as the silence of the coding room, Caine noted blearily, but just uncomfortable enough that he couldn’t entirely settle. It was probably his fault.

Kinger seemed to notice, starting to gently rock the exhausted program in his arms.

Another few minutes of silence passed before Kinger spoke again, his quiet voice rumbling against Caine where he was resting against the chess pieces chest.

“Did you ever process what happened to you? With Jax?” Kinger asked, taking Caine by surprise.

Caine shook his head against the fluff of Kinger’s robe. “Not really. I was so busy upgrading the circus, and by the time I wasn’t anymore… I was more focused on the moment at hand.”

“Well, we have all the time you need now.” Kinger said softly.

Caine closed his eyes. He didn’t want to think about it. It was the most helpless he had ever felt in the circus, unable to do anything. And Jax had hurt him, badly by even human standards, and Caine had never felt physical pain before then. Even worse, Jax had hurt the others, and there was nothing Caine could do to stop him. By all standards it was a terrible time, and that was putting it lightly.

But… it also led to him becoming a better ringmaster.

Better for the others at least, his new routine had definitely taken a toll on his own well being, with such long periods of time alone with his anxious thoughts.

“I... don’t really know what to think.” Caine started slowly. “It was… scary, and painful. But everyone else is doing so much better now. Really, the worst that came out of it is that I’m afraid of Jax… and my self esteem is shaky, but, hah, that’s not much different than before-”

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Caine’s head snapped up, pupils shrinking as his eyes locked on Bubble, who had appeared without him knowing. Caine’s mouth opened slightly, but no sound left him. He didn’t know how to answer.

Why didn't he tell Bubble? The soap sud was his closest companion, his literal assistant in this digital world, but he had hidden his problems from the one being he should have trusted with them.

Bubble floated over, settling in front of Caine’s face with a slight frown. Caine couldn’t hold eye contact for long, looking at the ground instead.

But no matter where he focused his vision, Bubble slid back into view, looking at him with his dot eyes that dug into his digital soul.

“Why didn't you tell me?” Bubble repeated quietly.

“About what, specifically?” Caine replied, knowing he was only delaying the inevitable.

“All of it. The injuries, the loneliness. Even before that, about how you felt. Why did you hide it from me?” Bubble continued calmly, but an undertone of sadness was clear to Caine. It hurt to hear.

Once again, Caine couldn't find it in himself to speak. 

Shame. Shame was the only answer Caine could come up with, and he knew it wasn't good enough. 

“I’m here to help you, Caine. But I can only help if you tell me something is wrong.”

Caine's vision was getting blurry, and there was a moment of panic where Caine didn't know what was happening to him until the first drop fell.

He was crying.

An overwhelming sense of emotion filled him, and once the dam broke his tears only flowed harder, pooling under his eyes and dripping down his teeth. 

All the feelings he had pushed aside, ignored, or missed in the chaos of time were rushing back to him, the shame, guilt, fear, anxiety, loneliness, terror, numbness and cold crushing him with their weight.

Caine sobbed into the fabric of Kinger’s cloak, gripping it tightly with both hands to the point that it threatened to rip, body shaking with adrenaline and exhaustion alike.

But new sensations punched through the blur of despair. A warm hand rubbing his back in a soothing rhythm, tracing soft patterns on his digital skin, the other resting on his waist, holding him securely. A buoyant form pushed its way into his arms, pressing against his chest and under his chin while expanding and contracting in a way that his panicked breaths could follow.

And with all of that came a blossoming warmth: not the sharp fire of deceitful knives, but a gentle spread of kindness and care that he could feel.

It took him minutes to calm himself, tears drying uncomfortably on his face, but his head felt clearer than it had in a long time.

Releasing his iron grip on Kinger, he leaned back, intending to wipe his face, but Bubble beat him to it, ascending from his spot on Caine’s lap and licking his face like an eager dog.

“Bub-eugh! Bubble, stop it!” Caine batted at the offending sphere, ignoring the quiet chuckling from the chess piece above him as he finally got Bubble to relent without popping him.

“Are you going to ask people for help, going forward?” Bubble asked earnestly, floating back to a respectable height.

Caine sighed. First Zooble, then Kinger, and now Bubble. He was never getting out of this. Not that he had the energy to try. “Fine.”

“Good. And I will be making sure.” Bubble said, nodding resolutely. “Now, I gotta make sure a certain rabbit hasn't caused any trouble.” 

Bubble disappeared with a pop, and Caine let out another sigh, Kinger patting his head fondly in response.

He would give himself another few minutes before he faced the inevitable swarm.

Chapter Text

The moment Caine exited the pillow fort, he was attacked.

He let out a muffled yelp as two figures wrapped around him, squeezing him comfortingly.

Oh, it was Gangle and Ragatha, and they were hugging him.

“Don’t you ever scare us like that again!” Ragatha cried, pulling back slightly to look him in the eye.

“Um… sorry.” Caine muttered, but both women shook their heads

“You don’t need to apologize, we’re just happy you're okay.” Gangle said, untangling her ribbons from around his form, before wrapping them firmly around his arm. “Now, you are coming with us, and we are going to draw.”

Caine blinked, then smiled apprehensively. “Okay?”

The trio marched to the art studio, Gangle taking the lead while Ragatha followed behind Caine. 

It was a relatively calm if moderately confusing walk for Caine, until they all spotted a purple figure lurking in the distance, and, knowing it wasn’t Kinger, they all picked up speed.

They only paused to take a breather once they reached the art studio and shut the door.

The first to recover, Ragatha padded over to her sewing station in the corner, grabbing swaths of yellow and black fabric. “While you two draw, I’m going to work on a sewing project, if that is alright?”

“Okay!” Gangle chirped, dragging Caine to the table in the center of the room.

They sat down at a corner of the table, both facing in Ragatha's general direction, although her back was facing them, so Caine couldn’t see what she was working on.

Gangle pulled out her most recent sketchbook, and handed a blank paper and pencil to Caine. He accepted the implements, but before he could do anything else, she slid a couple more papers over, these ones already drawn on.

The first was the drawing he had made during ‘the incident’, the one with all the (non-murderous) cast members reimagined as bees. The second drawing…

…was the one Gangle drew of him.

“Did you mean to give this one to me?” He asked, showing it to the artist in question.

Gangle nodded shyly. “I wanted you to have it, as a gift.”

…Caine had never gotten a gift before. This drawing had already meant a lot to him, when he had first seen it. It was a visual reminder that his players could see him in a positive light. And now it was being given to him.

Carefully setting them aside, worried he'd cry more if he kept thinking about it, Caine looked back at the blank paper set before him, picking up the pencil and tapping it idly as he thought.

Gangle noticed, tilting her head at him, and Caine spoke. “I… don’t know what to draw.”

“Well, whatever you want.” Gangle said simply. “Sometimes when I can’t think of what to draw, I just draw a bunch of eyes in different styles. It doesn’t have to be coherent, just having your pencil moving can be nice.” She flipped to another page in her sketchbook, which was filled with eyes. Anime eyes, realistic eyes, cartoon eyes, even eyes that looked like they were referenced from other members of the circus.

Caine hummed. He wasn’t interested in drawing eyes, but he did have something small and simple he did like to doodle, even if it was most of what he drew.

So the sketching began, bees slowly beginning to fill his page. Simple bees, more realistic bees, bees of different species, all buzzing from the top of the page onward. The silence of the group was comfortable, only the soft sounds of pencil on paper and the repetitive drone of the sewing machine filling the space.

But as Caine drew, something changed. Fuzzy stripes became swirling spirals, cute faces melted to become manic pupils, and buzzing wings drooped to become dripping tears.

It was only once he filled the page that he realized what he’d done, and he recoiled in surprise. Gangle startled slightly from her own drawing reverie, looking up at Caine in confusion and concern.

Caine looked back at her. “I… don’t know how this happened.” He said, sliding the paper over.

Gangle’s eyes widened when she registered what she was seeing. While the top of the page was filled with various bees, they slowly warped and changed as the page went on until they were a swarm of abstracted eyes. The look on her face softened into one of understanding.

“You know, sometimes drawing the thing that’s bothering you can be… nice. It gets it off your chest.”

“I’d rather just not think about it.” Caine mumbled, leaning his head on his hands.

“If I may ask,” Ragatha said from across the room, looking over her shoulder. She had turned off the sewing machine and was now threading a regular needle, while a bag of stuffing fluff sat beside her. “I was wondering why you were no longer wearing your ringmaster coat. Since, well, the white shirt is what you were wearing when…”

She didn't have to finish her thought, they all knew what she was referring to.

“It- well… I took my job as ringmaster too seriously, so I'm taking off my jacket when I'm not working to remind myself that I am also your friend.” Caine explained, hunching his shoulders defensively.

“Well… why not wear something new?”

Caine blinked. He'd… never thought of that. Not outside of an adventure context at least.

“Yeah!” Gangle piped up, pointing at him with your pencil. “You can make yourself a friend outfit! Something less formal, maybe?”

“Maybe a sweater! Something warm and cozy could be nice!” Ragatha added.

They were on to something, Caine thought, and looking back at his drawings, both old and new, he knew what he wanted it to look like. 

“One moment.” Was all he said, and with a snap he abruptly disappeared. 

Gangle and Ragatha were silent, staring at the place where Caine had been, when Gangle spoke up. “Weren't we not supposed to leave him alone?”

Before anyone could panic, Caine was back.

He wasn't wearing his white shirt, nor his ringmaster jacket. Instead, a fuzzy knitted sweater adorned his form, large black and yellow stripes incorporated across the neck and chest as well as down the sleeves.

“It's so cute!” Gangle squealed, shaking her arms in excitement.

Ragatha nodded eagerly, a large smile crossing her face. “And it looks super comfy!”

Caine wasn't sure how to respond, as flustered as he was, but he was happy with the reaction his new apparel got.

“Perfect timing too! I just finished my gift.” Ragatha continued, turning to face the others and hiding something behind her back. 

“You… also made a gift?” Caine asked, glancing briefly at Gangle before looking back at the approaching doll.

“It wasn't planned for us to both give one, we just both had the same idea, I guess!” Ragatha said chipperly. “Now, close your eyes! I want to give it to you before you see it.”

Caine obliged, his teeth clacking shut as he held out his hands. Something soft and round was handed to him.

“You can open your eyes now!”

In his hands was a newly made bee plushy.

The fabric was, hilariously, similar to the sweater he now wore. It had button eyes and a kind smile, its fuzzy wing a gentle blue and its legs stubby and round.

It was adorable, and it was made for him.

The tears couldn't be stopped now, and he quickly wiped them away, relishing in the feeling of his new sweater against his face. “You-... thank you, both. You didn't have to do this.”

“We wanted to!” Gangle said simply, standing up to join the two already up.

Caine smiled wider, pulling the two of them into a hug. They reciprocated quickly, a trio of artists huddled together in companionship and understanding.

Chapter Text

The trio’s hug was interrupted by the door opening.

A yellow snout poked through, followed by a red and blue jester hat.

“Hey guys.” Pomni said carefully, eyes darting around the group. “We aren't interrupting anything, are we?”

“Not at all!” Caine exclaimed, his bright attitude returning in full force. He quickly summoned a small portal, shoving the plush inside while declaring: “For safekeeping!”

Pomni smiled, a look of relief flashing on her face, before she continued. “I like your new sweater. And was that a bee plush?”

Caine grinned in return, hugging himself cheerfully. If he kept getting compliments he might just explode into confetti. “Why thank you! And yes, Ragatha made it for me!”

“Aw, that’s sweet!” Pomni said while opening the door further. “Anyway… Gummigoo and I were wondering if we could continue the camping adventure? We didn't get to do the fire or the overnight stuff.”

“Oh… sorry.” The self hug became somber as Caine wilted. 

“No! No, it's understandable.” Pomni quickly amended. “We aren't upset, we just want to keep going. If that's alright…”

“Well, of course! We can't leave an adventure unfinished!” Caine exclaimed, turning his mood around in an instant. “Except… I have one request.”

“Which is?” Ragatha prompted.

“...can we not invite Jax?” Caine asked quietly, as if saying the name could summon the purple entity.

The others smiled sympathetically, and nodded without hesitation.

“I'll go see if Zooble is up and wants to join.” Gangle said, ribbons swaying as she passed through the door to the tent at large.

“I'll grab Kinger!” Ragatha added, trotting towards the pillow fort.

“The portal will be left open near the stage!” Caine called back, following Pomni and Gummigoo to the aforementioned digital gateway.

Passing through the portal, it was immediately obvious that time had passed, which wasn't always a given in adventure maps. The sun was low over the lake, casting gorgeous coloured rays over the water and through the trees.

The unlit campfire awaited them, surrounded by overturned logs and stumps to sit on, pronged metal sticks for roasting marshmallows, and of course, a bag of s'more materials.

Pomni took a seat on a stump, leaving Gummigoo and Caine to sit next to her on a nearby log. Ragatha and Kinger appeared soon after, resting across from the trio. 

Finally, Gangle and a bleary eyed Zooble walked through the portal, which Caine closed with a quiet snap of his fingers. They joined the group on the log between Pomni and Kinger, facing the lake.

Now that everyone was there, Gummigoo grabbed the lighter left by the fire pit and carefully lit the wood pile, smiling triumphantly when they caught. 

As the sun nestled below the horizon, Ragatha began to hand out sticks and marshmallows to roast. She tried to pass one to Caine, but he held his hand up in refusal.

“You don't want a marshmallow, Caine?” She asked, looking moderately worried. 

“No thank you. Eating is… awkward and uncomfortable, especially with sticky foods.” Caine explained. Ragatha nodded, but before she could put away the stick, Kinger piped up.

“Oh! You could roast a marshmallow for me if you want!”

Caine tilted his head nervously, rubbing his arm. He still couldn't get over how soft his sweater was. It was grounding. “I don't know… what if I burn it?” 

“That's alright!” Kinger replied, eyes squinting happily. “I like my marshmallows burnt sometimes.” 

“Well, in that case…” Caine said, reaching for the stick. Ragatha handed it over with a smile, and soon everyone had a fluffy treat over the fire.

Caine did, in fact, burn the first marshmallow (which Kinger gleefully ate once it was cool enough), and was now being taught by Ragatha how to properly roast it.

The rest of the group were giggling as they put together s'mores, the gooey mix of sugar and chocolate getting on everyone's fingers. By the end of the snack fest, they were all somewhat thankful to be in a digital world where Caine could just will them to be clean again.

Now that the sun was fully set, the stars were twinkling in full force, dazzling the onlookers below. Fireflies soon joined in the light show, immediately captivating Kinger's attention as he began to explain firefly light communication to Ragatha. 

Zooble asked Caine for an acoustic guitar and was now strumming it softly, playing no song in particular, just strings of chords that flowed calmly over the group. Gangle leaned against them peacefully, eyes closed as she savoured the music.

Gummigoo and Pomni shared a look, one of apprehension and empathy, before the gummy gator turned to Caine.

“So, uh, I have an adventure request, if it's possible.” He started awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck.

Caine was immediately invested, leaning eagerly towards Gummigoo. “And what would that be, my sweet squishy friend?”

Gummigoo sighed, dropping his hand into his lap. “I was… I was hoping to get to see the lads again. Max and Chad?”

Caine was about to respond cheerfully, until Gummigoo continued. “But… I don't want you modifying any of their memories. And I don't want them finding out what they are.”

Well, that made things harder. “So you want me to include them in an adventure, without changing or adding to their memory, but having it be convincing enough that they don't catch on?” 

Gummigoo nodded, and Caine rested his head on his hand in contemplation.

“Don’t worry about it too much, I understand if it's a difficult request.” Gummigoo added.

Caine nodded. “I will see what I can do.”

As the night ambled on, the cast dispersed to set up their tents, finding that each ‘insta-tent’ box had a name on it. Kinger was the first to open his box, and shrieked in surprise when he suddenly found himself encased in canvas, the tent popping up fully formed around him. He was lucky he was standing in a reasonable spot for a tent.

Knowing what to expect thanks to Kinger, the others were less startled when they spawned their tents, pushing back through the fabric doors to laugh with each other. Each tent was inspired by the players avatars: Kinger’s was a small purple castle, Gangle’s made from flowing stage curtains, Pomni’s a small circus tent, and Ragatha’s a canvas doll house. Zooble’s and Gummigoo’s were relatively normal in comparison, only exhibiting the colours of their respective owners; that did mean Zooble’s tent looked like an abstract art piece, however.

Pomni was relatively quick to notice, though, that Caine did not have a tent.

It made sense, seeing as he wasn’t originally going to join the adventure, but she was confused as to why he hadn’t created one for himself yet.

“Hey Caine.” She called out quietly, and he perked up from where he was still sitting on the log. “Are you going to make a tent for yourself?”

Caine wilted slightly, fidgeting with his sweater sleeves. “Ah, well… I won’t be sleeping, so I figured I didn’t need one.”

“Are you unable to sleep?” She sat down next to him on the log, looking over at him with her head tilted.

“I can sleep, I just… don’t want to.” Caine said sheepishly. 

“Why not?” Pomni asked, then quickly backpedalled. “You- You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, I just…”

“It’s alright. I should probably share with someone, given what Zooble, Kinger and Bubble said.” Caine sighed, squeezing his arms.

He took a breath, then continued. “Whenever I sleep, I have… nightmares. I know, an AI having nightmares, I didn’t think that was possible either, but here we are. Usually they’re about Jax taking over again, but not always. Sometimes it’s people abstracting because I’m not good enough. Sometimes it's a repeat of the ‘ringmaster revenge’ adventure.”

Pomni went to speak, but Caine wasn’t done. “I’m aware that Jax can’t do anything now, and none of you would hurt me intentionally, but… nightmares aren’t exactly logical.”

“Yeah…” Pomni said solemnly, but seemed at a bit of a loss.

“I could stay up with you.”

Caine and Pomni looked up to see Gummigoo standing nearby, arms crossed. “I also don’t need, nor do I feel the need, to sleep, so I can stay up with you while the humans get their rest.”

“You… don’t have to do that.” Caine said quietly.

“I don’t. But I want to.” Gummigoo said simply. “I still haven’t had a chance to try the rapids, besides the swim I had earlier, and I wouldn’t mind a kayaking buddy.”

Caine was speechless for a moment. “...You swam the rapids?”

Gummigoo chuckled. “Never mind that. You in?”

“Uh, sure! Night rapids would be fun!” Caine said with hesitant optimism, floating up from his spot.

Pomni watched with a fond smile as the two AI’s approached the stored kayaks, before returning to her tent for a hopefully restful sleep after the chaos of the day.

Chapter Text

The following two weeks were strange for Caine.

Strange in a good way.

He had never had this much contact with people, even before he changed the circus, and now he constantly had a presence by his side. 

For the most part, it was amazing. He played games, participated in activities and adventures, and even just ‘hung out’ with the cast, and it was all he ever wished for: to surround himself with smiles.

It was very weird having people join him while he was creating adventures. Bubble could join him most of the time, which was fairly standard, but due to his responsibilities handling Jax he couldn’t always be around. So now, the players would take turns helping him make worlds for them to explore. It was like the suggestion box, but one hundred percent more immersive!

Though there was one adventure he would only work on while Bubble was around.

His new routine wasn’t all good. Hanging around the troupe meant he also had more contact with Jax, who, while he couldn’t physically touch the part-time ringmaster, still took the opportunity to taunt, mock, and terrorize the terrified program.

The others defended Caine, steering him away from the rabbit when they could, verbally sparring with Jax when necessary, or prompting Caine to retaliate against him with various tricks (spontaneous teleportation, selective mute, and once, by Gangle's suggestion, another maid dress). Bubble was also a critical asset in the war against Jax, attacking the lagomorph viciously if he ever took anything too far.

It was exhausting, but in Caine's opinion, well worth it for the warmth he felt being present with those he cared about, and who cared about him.

On the topic of temperature, the cold feeling didn’t entirely go away. He would often squeeze and scratch his arms out of habit, but due to the blood mechanic being entirely erased it didn’t cause any harm or heat.

Eventually, he found a better solution: Hugs.

Hugs from his friends filled him with a gentle warmth that would immediately smother the cold, so Caine would request hugs from anyone who was willing. Ragatha, Gangle and Kinger were happy to oblige, sweeping the cuddly program into their arms happily.

If he was ever paired with any of his more touch-averse friends, cuddling with his bee plushy was a reasonable substitute until he could get a hug from one of the others. It wasn't a perfect system, but it was significantly better than what he had before.

By the end of the two weeks, Caine was noticeably happier.

Not just because things were finally getting better. The buzz of excitement coursing through his body was clearly something of the adventure making sort, and the others just had to wait and see what he was scheming, as he (and Bubble) had refused to spill the beans.

He gathered the troupe around the stage for the usual introduction, adorned in his glowing red ringmaster jacket, fidgeting with his baton eagerly as Bubble floated mindlessly beside him.

“You certainly look excited.” Zooble commented preemptively, crossing their arms.

“I am indeed!!” Caine exclaimed, twirling in the air. “After two weeks of preparation, we are returning to a place we have been to before! Buckle your seatbelts and start your engines, because we are going to Candy Canyon Kingdom for a go-kart race!”

Cautious enthusiasm rippled through the group. It was a brief reminder of how the circus used to be, but no one could deny the optimistic implications for one member of the group.

Caine opened the pink and orange portal with a spinning flourish, waiting with barely contained patience as the cast walked through before flying in after them. 

They were met with similar fanfare to the last time they had been there, a roaring crowd welcoming the cast from their seats in the stands. Ahead of the group was a large candy coloured checkered banner spanning the start of the go-kart track. Meeting them in front of the portal was Princess Loolilalu, and beside her…

“Max! Chad!” Gummigoo cried as he rushed towards his best friends, the three of them colliding in a desperate, squishy hug. “I missed y’all so much.”

“We did what you asked, boss!” Max squeaked, a big smile on his muzzle.

“We delivered the syrup to your mum!” Chad added cheerfully.

Gummigoo pulled away from the hug slightly so he could look his friends in the eye, brows furrowed in concerned confusion. “...You did?”

“Yeah! Well, we delivered it halfway, and then God appeared to tell us we were forgiven by the kingdom!” Max elaborated, and Gummigoo felt like he had rediscovered the nature of his existence with the whiplash that sentence gave him. God? Who was he..?

Gummigoo glanced at Caine, who was hovering above the rest of the cast as they talked politely with the princess to give the gummy gators some privacy.

Oh.

Chad continued as if Gummigoo wasn’t actively losing his mind. “He said the princess invited us to a go kart race to celebrate, but we told him we had to deliver the syrup.”

“So he delivered the syrup for us with his magical god powers, and said that he made sure your mum was alright at the same time! That way we could join the go-kart race!” Max finished excitedly.

Gummigoo blinked, then blinked again, then asked the first (reasonable) thing that came to mind. “How long have you been here?”

“Oh! Well, we were given a new truck by God to get back to the kingdom, which took us about a day?” Chad answered first.

He was quickly interrupted by Max. “The princess gave us rooms in the castle while we waited for all of you to show up! We got to participate in feasts and dances and games! Which was for… about a week!”

Gummigoo was completely lost. Caine said he wouldn’t modify the gummy gators’ existing memories, but clearly something had happened between him leaving and finally returning. The timeline did seem to stick out to him, but why…

It finally clicked, and Gummigoo had to hold back a gasp.

It had been two weeks since he had asked Caine to run an adventure with the gummy gang in it.

Caine only runs an adventure every second day, with the other day reserved for making adventures, where the others would stay in the tent and grounds.

One week total of running regular adventures, and another week, plus night time, where he wouldn’t run anything.

Where he could run an adventure in the background, with no player participating.

It was clear that Caine had modified Candy Kingdom and the NPCs within, as it would have been impossible to run any different adventure without doing so.

But he had not touched Max and Chad, only finishing their quest for them so they would not learn it was fake, inviting them to the race, and setting up a place for them to stay and enjoy while they waited.

It was a lot of effort for two characters that weren’t technically real, but they meant a lot to Gummigoo, and it meant even more that Caine would put in the effort for him.

Gummigoo pulled the other gators back into the hug, worried they would question him if they saw the teary look on his face. “I’m glad y’all had fun and are doing well.” He said, voice wobbly. “Now, are y’all ready to win a race?”

“Yeah!!” The gummy gang cheered in tandem, bouncing out of the hug and racing off to their karts.

Pomni padded up beside Gummigoo, smiling up at him hesitantly. “How did it go?”

Gummigoo glanced down at her with an emotion filled expression, unable to truly articulate how he felt without words. So, he kept it succinct. “It went well.”

Their attention was pulled away when they heard the other gummy gators cry out.

“Me arms are too short!” Max yelled, clearly struggling to grab at his seat belt to buckle it.

“Me arms are too long!” Chad added shortly after.

Gummmigoo and Pomni shared a fond look, then left to help.

Caine, still in his ringmaster jacket, oversaw the participants taking their places in the go-carts, fastening their seat belts and activating the safety protocols. Everyone was participating, including the two other gummy gators, the princess, and of course, himself!

Now that everyone was ready to go, Caine swapped out his jacket with a snap of his fingers, donning his fuzzy bee sweater, then took a swift seat in the last remaining kart, giddy with excitement.

“On your marks!” An NPC announced, the crowd roaring in response.

Jax grinned predatorily at his competitors, eyes briefly locking on Caine’s. “You are all going to eat my dust.”

“Get set!”

Caine’s smile turned mischievous.

…

The starting line was silent.

Maybe putting Disappearing Guy as the race host was a bad idea.

“GO!!” Caine shouted, and the race was on, karts peeling out of the kingdom in a cloud of particled sugar.

All except one.

Jax sputtered in the candy dust, his kart stalling for a moment before finally kicking into gear, Bubble cackling from his special back seat.

The cast's laugh echoed into the saccharine skyline.