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Surrogate: The Director's Cut by Kraiva, Somniate, Trin (ssjtrinity)
Fandom: Malevolent (Podcast)
- Mature, Teen And Up Audiences, General Audiences, Not Rated
- No Archive Warnings Apply, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
- Gen, Other, M/M, Multi, F/F
- Series in Progress
18 Dec 2025
- No Archive Warnings Apply
- Graphic Depictions Of Violence
- Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
- Major Character Death
- The King in Yellow & Faroe Lester
- Arthur Lester & John Doe
- John & Arthur Lester
- John/Arthur Lester
- Arthur Lester & Faroe Lester
- Arthur Lester & The King in Yellow (Malevolent)
- John & The King in Yellow (Malevolent)
- Faroe Lester & Nibbles Lester
- John & Arthur Lester & Faroe Lester
- The King in Yellow & Arthur Lester
- The King in Yellow/Arthur Lester
- (in SOMEONE’S mind palace anyway)
- Dis & Lori
- Nibbles Lester & Shub-Niggurath
- Dis/Lori
- Lori Rosewater/Dis
- John & Arthur Lester & The King in Yellow
- Peter "Parker" Yang/Yellow (Malevolent)
- John & The King in Yellow & Arthur Lester
- Peter "Parker" Yang & Yellow (Malevolent)
- Arthur Lester & Peter "Parker" Yang
- Peter "Parker" Yang/Sunny | Yellow (Malevolent)
- Peter "Parker" Yang/Sunny| Yellow (Malevolent)
- Dis & Faroe
- Tabby & The Keeper
- Dagon & the King in Yellow
- Arthur Lester/Frank Lamont (OC)
- John & Yellow (Malevolent)
- Kayne/Odd (Surrogate)
- Dagon/Hastur (subtle but there)
- The King in Yellow & Dagon
- John & Faroe Lester
- Hastur & Odd (Unless...)
- Hastur & Odd
- Hastur & Odd (Unless...?)
- Kayne/Odd
- Wallace Larson & the Librarian
- John & Sunny | Yellow (Malevolent)
- Odd/Kayne
- Odd/Hastur
- The King in Yellow/Odd (Surrogate)
- Kayne & The Keeper
- Hastur/Odd (Surrogate)
- Odd (Surrogate)/The King In Yellow
- The King in Yellow/Odd the Bard
- Arthur Lester & Aria (Surrogate)
- Peter "Parker" Yang / Sunny | Yellow (Malevolent)
- John & Arthur Lester...?
- Hastur/Odd
- Andrew Larson | Wallace Larson & The Librarian (Surrogate)
- The Keeper (Surrogate) & Kayne
- Kayne/Alternate Odd
- Kayne & Arthur Lester
- Um... - Relationship
- Peter "Parker" Yang/Yellow | Sunny (Malevolent)
- The King in Yellow (Malevolent)
- Faroe Lester
- Arthur Lester
- John (Malevolent)
- Kayne (Malevolent)
- Shub-Niggurath (Cthulhu Mythos)
- The Great Race of Yith
- Nibbles Lester
- General Cthulhu Pantheon
- John Doe
- Original Female Characters
- Kuranes (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Dark Young of Shub-Niggurath (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Original Female Character(s)
- The Yithians!
- The Keeper (Surrogate)
- The Dukes of Ishara (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Sadie (Surrogate)
- Lori Rosewater (Surrogate)
- Dis (Surrogate)
- The Trader (Malevolent)
- The Oracle (Surrogate)
- The King In Yellow (The King in Yellow)
- Peter "Parker" Yang (Malevolent)
- Yellow (Malevolent)
- Andrew Larson | Wallace Larson
- Dis (Malevolent)
- the enemy - Character
- Sunny (Surrogate)
- Sunny | Yellow (Surrogate)
- Sunny | Yellow (Malevolent)
- Nibbles Lester (Surrogate)
- Tabby (Surrogate)
- NIbbles (Surrogate)
- Dagon (Cthulhu Mythos)
- [REDACTED] - Character
- Dagon
- Frank Lamont (Surrogate)
- Ialdagorth (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Odd (Surrogate)
- Aria (Surrogate)
- The Librarian (Surrogate)
- Tabby Mormont (Surrogate)
- Cthylla (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Walter | The Dunwich Horror (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Walter Whatley | The Dunwich Horror (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Gloon (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Dagon (Surrogate)
- The Gears (Surrogate)
- Other - Character
- Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
- Martin Blackwood
- The King in Yellow and the King in Yellow and the King in Yellow and the (Malevolent)
- Cthulhu (Surrogate)
- Hasteenies
- Also Odd (Surrogate)
- Someone Else We Won't See For A While (Surrogate)
- Cthulhu (Cthulhu Mythos)
- Hasteenies (Surrogate)
- Tom (Surrogate)
- The Yithians (Surrogate)
- Yellow | Sunny (Malevolent)
- Revenge goes wrong
- Sort of a Happy Ending?
- It's Dark But It Comes Back Around Sort Of?
- No Little Girls Are Harmed
- Everybody Else Takes a Beating Though
- Forced Family Instead of Found Family
- No explicit suicdal thoughts
- But Arthur Is Low
- It's Miniseries Time
- Angst
- Fluff and Angst
- Angst with a Happy Ending
- Sort Of
- Queerplatonic Relationships
- kayne is also there but mostly just mentioned
- hastur is a petty bitch and tantrums about dumb shit
- arthur lester is trying his best
- john is mad because he is angry
- if Hastur doesn't want to be bullied WHY IS HE SO EASY TO BULLY
- tw: nonconsentually giving a child a puppy
- forced family
- Cthulhu Mythos
- John is afraid for Arthur and he should be
- Hastur's pretty damn good at breaking people
- Fortunately it seems Faroe is pretty damn good at putting them back together
- FYI there are a couple of sentences of graphic violence but I promise not too much
- this is a perfectly normal fanfic. come closer :)
- Whump
- Angst and Hurt/Comfort
- Heavy Angst
- arthur is EXTREMELY LOW
- brief attempt at self harm
- but it's thwarted don't worry
- the rumor mill is spinning
- Crack
- Just basic Kayne fuckery
- Very mild but potentially disturbing emotional manipulation
- Gaslighting an almost-four-year-old
- Consider this... an hors d'oeuvres
- /ominous foreshadowing intensifies/
- Ominous
- Soft
- Healing isn’t impossible
- But it does take time
- Can Hastur gaslight gatekeep girlboss his way out of this one? (No.)
- This gets very intense
- Shubby knew what she was doing and is sharing Gardetto’s with Kayne
- At least Arthur finally got a full night’s sleep?
- Psychological fuckery abounds
- The word "catamite" is used but it does not apply
- Little pitchers have big ears
- Weaponized cuteness (we all knew it was coming)
- No Hastur that is not why your first plan went wrong
- Hastur stop
- (He won't stop)
- We can have a tiny divorce as a treat
- no goats are harmed in this fic
- but a fucked up lil creature is
- it's difficult when you're a baby and you get jealous for the first time
- kayne is here but he goes unnamed
- it's not super extended or anything but kayne is definitely a bit inappropriate with the protagonist
- Espionage
- Eavesdropping
- Just a little soft stuff to prepare for what's coming
- These are fluffy
- not too sweet
- Hastur's plan is... uh working?
- They are right to be nervous
- But it's okay to have a good time too
- it's still june 3 somewhere in the us HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOHN
- I HAVE GIVEN YOU A GOOD TIME
- john has a nice and fun time and nothing bad happens
- it's so kind of Harlan to put John's birthay during pride month
- happy pride everyone
- He hasn't forgotten
- Hastur sure has a lot of juggling props in the air doesn't he
- He has not at all forgotten
- he is Afraid
- (And he is right to be)
- Ignore the crossover
- It's just scenery
- CHEWABLE scenery
- Everyone's communicating so well aren't they (they're not)
- spring rite hm wonder what that's all about
- Rated "M" for off-screen monster-sex and Ravel's Bolero
- No really it's Bolero it's deserved
- also rated A for "aaah get me out of this"
- fertility rite
- It's all to honor Shubby
- Who wouldn't want her in their corner
- Two Drunk Gods and One Arthur Who'd Rather Be Anywhere Else
- No one is molested
- unless you count aggressive attempts at teddy-bearing
- you thought there would be no consequences for the rite? you thought wrong!
- in which john learns that even without a body you can get hungover
- arthur is doin better... for now
- maybe its something about it being a whole year
- errybody in the palace gettin tipsy
- holy shit we're at 20 parts in this series
- Oh sure this won't come back to bite anyone
- Yes Hastur this is a great idea it could never backfire
- Nibbles is also a baby and this is important to remember
- Ouch
- So sorry sweet Faroe
- heads up: violence to an amorphous eldritch creature (nibbs is doing her job)
- sad goat hours
- points and screams "SHE'S JUST A BABY!!!"
- hurt/comfort but in a parental way
- shub's a good mom
- but a human is a human
- Especially when taught to analyze their situation
- One might say it’s all coming to a head
- Not a divorce fic but some stuff comes up and realizations are had
- She's practically eight!
- Pity Dis is the only adult in her life shooting straight with her
- Warning for a little girl admiring her powerful father
- She doesn't know any better
- the boys can have a teeny tiny divorce. as a treat.
- not even a divorce really
- since arthur isn't really fighting back
- just a reminder that mental health is not a straight road
- even before you factor in the king in yellow
- soft boys. gentle. i love them
- The first of three pieces covering a few days
- covering some growth for Arthur and someone like Arthur
- beginning to explore the word... "broken"
- Warning for mention of Greek oympic foreskins
- Canon Typical Malevolent Warnings
- References to Past Child Abuse
- Religious Cults
- this is another nice and normal fanfic. come closer :)
- ignore my... friendship enabling stick. it is not a bat. it will not harm you
- content warning in the notes friends
- Who knew being bookended by two halves of an eldritch god could have a medicinal effect?
- Child death (mentioned)
- Starts heavy gets lighter
- We all knew this day was coming
- Complicated subjects
- Dark Stuff
- Is he a good dad or a bad dad I don't know yes no maybe both all none terrible go away hisssss
- (I am leaving that weird brain dump in the tags)
- everyone is trying so hard
- Nibbles can have a little wanton destruction as a treat
- this is silly
- just go with it
- It's improvement of a sort
- Yes I fully believe this idiot WOULD bleed out over stubbornness and a bowl of soup
- having fun isn't hard when you've got a library card!
- this girl needs some therapy
- nibbles is the best partner in crime
- goddamnit hastur
- hm! there's shenanigans afoot
- Oh those Yithians
- I mean it’s not like they’ve been read into what’s going on
- oh right this is FORCED family not FOUND family
- sometimes you gotta crack a few backs to make an omelette
- lowkey want hastur to crack my back tho it hurts so bad
- begone THOUGHT
- well you know this had to be coming eventually
- it's not as if Hastur has enough to deal with right now
- -shakes him like a ketchup bottle-
- John doesn't know what he wants
- Hastur doesn't know what he wants
- Arthur doesn't know what he wants
- They all need marriage counseling
- You might say the tension is Growing
- They really think she doesn't know what's going on
- They really think this intelligent head-strong little girl RAISED TO BE A LEADER
- is going to be fine with all of this
- "He fell" sure Hastur sure
- Okay to be fair the games are DAYS away and everyone is really stressed out
- But yeah these three chuckleheads need to get themselves figured out
- ...or three mildly sadistic writers are gonna do it for them
- NOTE: There is some physical violence in this one
- The answer was no
- She didn't believe them
- And this little girl doesn't know what to do
- i am NOT winding up a bat
- i am NOT preparing to swing
- shub! is! a! good! mom!
- don't worry trin has a treat for y'all later if you're good
- this one's short but bittersweet
- This will go on for THREE DAYS
- It isn't gonna end how ANYBODY thinks
- including the "director"
- Final story arc of season one is GO
- Tiny divorces for everybody
- Arthur gets to be a little bit of a PI again
- Hastur faces his limitations and has Some Dark Thoughts
- Looks like things are changing for everyone
- and at least SOME chickens are coming home to roost
- we've all been talked into doing something foolish by a kid
- Someone clonk their heads together
- this fic is certified compliant with the HPL Dreamlands canon
- No I am not joking
- just mixin up a mini muffin for y'all since you've been good
- tho this is more like the whole dang 6 pack
- Faroe has a plan now
- Everyone in Celephais has a massive balancing act to pull off
- Lori has a surprise background
- Arthur finally has some decent clothes
- It's ALL happening in Celephais today
- WTNV spoilers sort of
- when there's somethin' strange
- in the dead god bodies
- who ya gonna call
- gee hm surely this will never come up again
- and this will definitely not make kayne feel more pissed
- it'll be fine i'm sure
- Hastur doesn’t find the divorces amusing
- he really would just lock them in a room
- He’s TRYING okay??
- (also what’s this juicy tidbit he just dropped?)
- (irrelevant I’m sure)
- oh no
- he told you he hated repeating himself.
- He couldn't just send a hurricane
- He had to send a MESSAGE
- I think we can agree: message received
- Tw: offscreen animal death
- alas
- it's time to put the little girl through the horrors
- Both of them
- really got to invoke my silent hill roots for this one
- anyway kindly sit on that x so i can hit you with the bat you know the drill
- Thanks
- So anybody remember that fish-man who tried to hurt Faroe and got away?
- Slightly lighter fare before heading back into the darkness
- I do!
- 0:)
- What are we here for if not self-indulgent plot-bunnies?
- Also: Investigator!Arthur is on the case
- Hastur is grumpy
- None of them can blamed for any of this
- Reference of religious trauma
- Dehumanization
- warning for judicious use of a pun
- in this one Faroe gets a break from the Horrors
- until i strike again
- me sowing: fuck yeah fuck yeah fuck yeah this will be great
- This Is Fine
- T H I S I S F I N E
- And YOU get some trauma! And YOU get some trauma!
- And then we lit it on fire. :)
- hey batter batter hey batter SWING batter batter
- i do not like the dukes of ishara
- don't worry they'll get what's comin' to them eventually
- time for more Horrors for the childs
- warning for an adult man manipulating a child
- the child turns out okay but he sucks
- kayne is mentioned briefly
- Just a minute of down-time between the Horrors
- (Even if that minute involves cleaning up after them)
- words cannot describe how excited I am to inflict this upon you all
- we're really in for it now ariana
- oh arthur
- You really don't see what's happening do you
- cw: manipulation of an almost-nine-year-old
- gonna be a lot of that coming up sorry everyone
- hope this fireside chat bodes as well as the last one did! (spoiler: it does not)
- hey nibbs what's your DEAL
- anyway don't mind me i'm just painting an x on the ground beneath this big anvil
- should be ready for y'all in a few fics :3c
- don't worry tho we SUPER DUPER promise we will fix it
- Perspective is a hell of a drug isn’t it?
- At any rate Arthur has some thoughts but like hell is he going to say them out loud…
- look we've been busy both with rl stuff and also busy cookin' up some grub for y'all
- it's gonna be super tasty be patient just a little longer
- mama's got a real treat for you i promise
- in the meantime: shoutout to the best character in the podcast
- the trader is love the trader is life
- Gaslighting
- Emotional Manipulation
- it's gonna be a bit rough for poor Faroe from here on out take that as a warning
- This one isn't too violent
- but i'll tell you what
- Hold Your Breath
- find your comfort blankie now
- Kayne's show is just about to wrap up
- Canon-Typical Violence
- Character Death
- Gore
- Grief/Mourning
- They all forgot what day it was... but Kayne sure as heck did not.
- Physical violence though offscreen
- Do Not Attempt These Feats At Home
- Larson Is a Sadist
- (Everybody already knew that)
- It's all about choices in the end isn't it
- Series-appropriate violence and language
- Fallout time
- Lots of drama
- no violence or anything much
- but everybody is VERY UPSET
- more fallout
- Explicit Language
- someone is drowning in grief
- Grief is a terrible thing
- Just a mini-muffin
- Part of Hastur's new plan NEARLY goes awry
- everything happens so much to these two
- but sunny is trying
- and parker is proud of him
- Uh-oh
- It seems Hastur has drawn... some attention
- Good thing Hastur is something of a pack-rat
- we don't talk about... you know what maybe we do
- Finally
- Part one of a very difficult conversation
- part two of parker and sunny having healthy communication
- we love this for them
- even if the conundrum of arthur lester is difficult to talk about
- its wild to think about how yellow was only with arthur for like two days
- brief discussion of faust
- Just a little talk
- nothing like putting the fear of god into someone
- Fun Times Were Had By All
- Are we at the bottom fo the mystery yet?
- definitely not
- But this is certainly... getting closer
- hey hastur hey buddy neglecting your physical needs probs isn't great for you
- gotta use the resources afforded to us
- arthur definitely won't think this is suspicious at all
- hopefully he's asleep wait a minute it'll be like... five minutes at most
- uh oh girls
- yeah arthur deffo remembers how that first one went down
- and they only JUST got here
- look at him go
- Some people don't have issues talking JOHN
- No rules just fluff
- This is crack
- This is a crack fic
- I don't know what else to tell you the King in Yellow is a hamster
- it's a nibbs fic i know y'all have been wanting one
- standard warning for violence done unto little creechurs who are up to no good
- certain people are starting to attract attention
- john is only there briefly being his bitchy little self sorry john stans
- half-rite: full rite consequences
- It's Time Everybody Hold On To Your Garters
- there surely won't be strange outcomes based on previous drunken conversations!!!
- not explicit but DEFINITELY suggestive in areas
- the morning after
- poor kid needed a do-over for her ninth birthday after all
- the gang's all here
- warning: this one WILL give you a toothache from the sweetness
- tabby really is That Bitch tbh
- uhhhhhh things get a little gnarly but it's not too bad i promise
- Some things are coming home to roost
- but before that… baking
- it's the 100th fic we had to go all out
- Intrigue! Mystery! Attempted murder!
- ANGST FOR DAYS BE WARNED
- John is... Going Through Some Things
- cw: vomiting
- what you thought people wouldn't notice?
- i'm not a soup girlie so i had to consult outside help for which soup i should use
- sunny is trying and we're very proud of him
- parker is especially proud
- He is having a DAY lemme tell ya
- Ballet to the rescue
- fun animal facts with the keeper :)
- we had a lot of fun with the memes in this one
- meanwhile: the honeymoon ends
- this was gonna have to come up eventually
- It's easy to forget from the outside that John is going through it
- Tantrums hide The Pain Inside
- Warning for Dick Trac(ing)ey
- WWII mention... sort of
- Lore - Freeform
- I wrote this and drafted it on Parker's birthday so it counts
- happy birthday parker
- me writing sunny: i'm going to make an [entity] that is SO [fruity]
- actually managed to keep this one a mini muffin
- sometimes chapters with the Keeper are all 'oh hey lets all hang out and cuddle and watch movies!'
- and other times it's "HERE COMES THE KEEPER WITH THE STEEL CHAIR!!!"
- one step forward on the long painful road
- but the first step is always the hardest
- keeps: why are you critiquing me i'm right
- Cruelty afoot
- Kraiva did the last line don’t look at me
- hastur was gonna find out eventually
- plots upon plots upon plans upon plots
- all parker wants is a break from his enclosure lets see if he gets it
- one of my favorite bits in the series is 'pahkah'
- because no one in the dreamlands has heard a boston accent before
- Anybody order some angst?
- Gray-Asexuality
- At least the way I experience it
- You got angst in my fluff! I got fluff in your angst! Maybe they're better... TOGETHER!
- the mysterious [Redacted] has been REVEALED
- y'all don't get any more info on him tho :)
- anyway uh oh uh oh uh oh
- The girls have been... busy
- this particular bird has been clamoring to come home to roost
- oopsie whoopsie someone made a fucky wucky!
- Parker has a keen mind
- he's really good at what he does
- but it's true... he was not prepared
- Angst and Feels
- even the best relationships have speedbumps
- Not that we didn't know what he was doing
- but did he REALLY have to go that hard
- (yes yes he did)
- to be loved is to be changed
- and sunny is feeling the full effects of it
- this is challenging for anyone but gods aren't meant to change
- even tiny pieces of one
- everything's fine here
- don't look too closely
- thousands of years of habit don't go away overnight
- or even over a decade
- surely this is the BEST COURSE OF ACTION FOR ALL
- And Now For Something Completely Different
- gods being dicks in other ways
- i wonder why none of their other siblings like to hang out with gorthy
- yeah we call him gorthy b/c it's funny
- well Kayne wanted drama
- boy would this go differently if a certain someone hadn’t been here
- Get ready for some c o u r a g e
- it's not so good a thing that Hastur has time to think
- (His plans always work)
- so uh
- Most wholesome preparation for off-screen monster-sex imaginable
- i don't know what to tell you
- psst Kayne is a monster more in the next chapter
- no good deed goes unpunished when Kayne is in a bad mood
- off-screen activity REALLY IS consensual
- however waking up in the situation he’s in is not
- technically dubcon in latter half due to memory shenanigans
- Odd is traumatized but he is gonna be okay
- Look dude you had to know this was coming
- Clever conversations usually work better when nobody is hungover
- Hastur cannot complain he brought this on himself
- Odd is a superstar
- Warning for “ponies”
- aria is the embodiment of 'gaslight gatekeep girlboss'
- thank god she's good at lying since arthur canNOT
- Listen: Larson is a wicked man and brings it on himself
- Secrets never stay that way
- we are not sorry
- Also the music is as Kayne might say an earworm
- Intermezzo spoilers sort of
- We figured it's a good chance to lay out just where Surro departs from the main timeline
- Also Sunny is Liddol that is all
- Sort of spoilers for the whole show?
- 'something something bodacious rack' was the working title i didn't mean for it to stick
- silly goofy nonhuman anatomy woes
- and then the power of acceptance
- uh oh odd youre getting lestered too arentcha
- And SunnyParks continue to win the award for best communication in this timeline
- Just some thinky thoughts from a deeply stressed individual who Has No Time
- It isn't every day a god wants to spoil a guy
- Pining
- ridiculous pining
- Really absurd ridiculous pining
- Self-pity too but whatever
- he's going through it
- This one ends in a.... PLACE
- At least Kayne feels it's all balanced out again
- Also Dis's cloaking device just slipped
- Dissociation and derealization
- everyone is goin' through the wringer in this one
- fallout isn't always bad
- also sometimes the drama one hoped for just doesn't happen and that's okay
- I don't have an explanation for this
- the toxic yaoi prevails
- kayne is in a snit the reasons will be revealed tomorrow
- can odd mansplain manipulate manwhore his way out of this one
- tabby: i've had just about enough of this guy
- sometimes you gotta choose the lesser of two evils
- You know what’s funny
- It literally does not even occur to them that separating would kill the other as a lever because
- they have zero desire to be apart
- Tagged for fantasized violence
- Fantasized torture
- explicit description of torture
- i enjoy putting the squid in situations
- keeps read up on a radical new way of dealing with snippy bitches
- she definitely inherited arthur's stubbornness
- sunny is going to help all these fuckers heal if it kills him
- he is using that as a threat to get people to cooperate
- so sometimes
- people who know damn near everything forget to double-check what they know
- Oops
- kayne forgor
- someone gon' be real embarrassed
- Just sibling stuff
- no really there is no trap being wound up here
- parker's goin' through it
- it's almost like someone who is used to caring for others isn't super good at caring for himself
- luckily his partner is not gonna let him drown
- heads up for fantasies/memories of violence
- it might be a mini muffin but i have filled it with rat poison
- enjoy
- the toxic yaoi returns with a vengeance
- kayne's having a bad series of days and so likes to show up and watch this silly little bard squirm
- not quite a kid with an anthill and an hourglass
- less destructive
- ...for now
- Faroe does a therapie
- One of her parents is doing it she might as well too
- (if only it was both)
- WARNING for this one
- There is discussion of sexual assault
- IT IS NOT GRAPHIC
- but it is there and possibly heavy
- It is a deeply needed conversation for the boys to have
- reminder: if it happened to you it is never ever your fault
- he's still in a mood
- that means it's time to poke around in things he has no business poking around in
- trauma is bad but sometimes... it leaves you more able to see traps
- and sometimes people are just assholes because their baby sister kicked their butt
- odd manwhored a bit too close to the sun
- kraiva: that's my boy
- -traumatizes him-
- kraiva: OH NO MY BOY
- at last the carnival comes to a close
- and with it a new beginning
- wow hastur is being so cool and magnanimous about this
- I hope thats real change and not a symptom of a larger problem
- anyway heres your vow renewals you animals. stop asking
- the NBM (nasty bastard man) strikes again!
- i've been chomping at the bit for a showdown
- the poor librarian here tho
- on one hand wally is his assistant
- on the other odd is ~THE BARD~ and SO fun
- on the other other OH BABY DRAMA'S A BREWIN AND THE LIBRARIAN HAS FRONT ROW SEATS
- sometimes two wounded people can find comfort in each other
- and can appreciate how things have changed and how fleeting this may be
- there's more battles to be won but at least they know they're not alone
- A moment of peace
- yeah no one is gonna see odd for a bit lmfao
- hastur has a lot of stress to work out and odd is happy to help
- he wanted to come to breakfast mostly to see the look on wally's face tbh
- a belated birthday fic for the birthday boy :)
- when trin mentioned her idea i lost it i love chocoflan
- no apologies from me
- I'm getting a root canal tomorrow and that stress is coming out as HOLY FUCK THAT CANDLE
- The slowest burn that ever burned is finally putting out some heat
- AKA Arthur had a spicy dream and has feelings about it
- Demisexual Arthur Lester
- nothing like an intimate ceremony to bring the freaks out of the woodwork
- lovingly but also not lovingly at all (you'll see)
- nothing can ever be simple in this family
- luckily odd is (mostly) up to the task
- off-screen hastur/odd sex but lots of on-screen nonsexual intimacy
- so be forewarned
- also there's a marking! which is kinda body-horror-y
- anyway we're so excited to be here and show y'all what this is SUPPOSED to be like
- we’ve been heading this way since the Wood so long ago
- time for some personal growth
- ig some spoilers for the dunwich horror if you haven't read it already
- and discussion of the traumas that may arise from a situation like that
- I swear we’re coming back soon
- no need to smite us!
- but we DO like working on the Malevolent Big Bang sorry Kayne
- Fourth Wall? What Fourth Wall?
- ah to be an outer god aware of the fourth wall yet unable to see past it
- versus kayne who is manifesting in my house as we speak
- season two is almost over
- I'm sure everything will be fine
- something something come closer we've got no bat to swing
- everyone just has to be moving so fast
- why can't the world pause while Stuff Gets Done
- arthur gets there in time as we all knew he would
- but maybe it's too late
- some things... have been getting worse since before Hastur even took Arthur to Carcosa
- some things can no longer stay under the rug
- we were gonna wait until after the mbb to post but we're too excited sorry
- why what's this
- a chance to catch our breath before the Big Show
- watch out tickets are very limited
- Mother made sure of that
- birth after all should be a private affair
- deep breaths everyone
- this is gonna be a bumpy ride
- Everybody is just a LITTLE IN SHOCK right now
- Overstimulation can happen to gods too
- overstimulation is no game
- neither is loneliness
- this one's going to take some patience... but it's worth the trip
- there's a specific kind of self harm where one keeps giving to the detriment of the self
- which odd should know
- but he loves his family too much to not try anyway
- one cannot pour from an empty cup
- All good things must come to an end
- though not necessarily an end
- its a long road ahead but odd is ready to face it
- he just hopes his family will be okay in the meantime
- warning for peanut butter atrocities
- reminder this is horror and can be horrible
- uh oh
- some bog standard kayne fuckery is afoot
- ofc on the night of baby's first gala
- sometimes we don't handle new feelings well
- and sometimes the new feelings echo olds ones too closely and we trip over our past
- nothing going wrong here
- nope - Freeform
- warning for flashing lights
- soooooort of
- will these idiots talk?
- no
- come on you knew they wouldn't
- john has a very simple philosophy
- "he who fucks around WILL find out"
- shame it doesn't apply to arthur in any way or they might TALK
- just an almost-eleven-year old trying to figure things out
- "precocious" means intellectually brilliant but really can't include emotional maturity
- treasure
- That is all
- there will never be enough time
- you knew he had to do it to 'em
- Return Of The Queen
- Identity can be really hard when you dont have the vocabulary for it
- But once again
- An outstretched hand can come from the unlikeliest of places
- And hope may win out
- we were overdue for a divorce i think
- poor john has to deal with his Big Boy feelings all alone
- or maybe he wouldn't have to if he uh
- talked to someone
- kings of communication here!
- tw in chapter 2 for intense sexual harassment
- details in after chapter notes of ch 1
- what can we say a LOT is happening
- will people use their words instead of cryptic nonsense? Time will tell
- gratuitous use of a binky (joke) (or is it)
- a flashback and a bit of a reprieve
- 'before what' you ask
- you'll find out :) - Freeform
- another case on the books for pahkah the wise and sunny the golden
- See you in season three
- :)
- kraiva: 'h-horse divorce...'
- we're so back babes
- a little appetizer
- if you will
- when two rivers mix they get muddy
- new OTP: muddy rivers
- trin and kraiva are that monkey meme rn
- ohhhh buddy you just gotta keep makin' the worst decisions possible huh
- startin' off season 3 going 200 miles an hour
- the problem with telling people hastur is taking the 'throw the baby bird out of the nest' route
- is that then john actually has to figure shit out
- luckily he's got the best people around to back him up
- while hastur's away his children must play
- otherwise people will think something is hinky
- everyone is being very brave and strong in this one
- even though that doesn't necessarily translate into good decisions
- warning for some attempted sexual contact as it were in ch 5
- Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism
- do not follow this example you genuinely can die
- no real warnings for this one
- unless you count sappiness
- (for which we will not apologize)
- the slowest burn of all has finally ignited
- well and truly
- at long last kraiva can officially use the / indicator in the relationships tag
- bless
- sexual dialogue and sorta-offscreen sexual content
- not explicit
- buuuuuuuuuuuuuuut
- some yithians: "we poppin the BIGGEST bottles when arthastur becomes canon in fic 200!"
- oh man i hope nothing ruins the honeymoon jarthur are going to have!
- looks at title
- anyway back to business as usual in the Dreamlands
- a mini muffin on the 100th anniversary of a certain someone's awakening
- dark things are afoot
- perhaps the situation is much more dire than anyone thought
- Body Horror
- bad things are happening kids
- more trauma for the trauma bus
- the toxic yaoi is at it again
- escalation is always a bad sign
- offscreen sexual content
- i mean kinda onscreen but its not explicit
- Mind the Tags
- As for everything else... youre gonna have to trust us
- let it be known that you reap what you sow
- a homecoming of sorts
- and perhaps there is a price too steep for wallace larson in the end
- kraiva's being cryptic because she finds it funny
- part 3 of 'everything happens so much' day
- we'll get to the end of it eventually
- now we have the canonically supposed to be very smart characters being dumb
- and a very surprising tattle-tale
- as it turns out you can have two sides of the same coin
- with deeply different experiences due to the sources of their knowledge and power
- Kraiva says she’s not a TMA writer but here we are 😈
- the love was there. it didn't change anything; but it was there
- stinky boys take a bath
- sunny is fine don't worry parker put water wings on him
- it's about time for an ensemble fic
- time for a rescue mission
- so glad that everything is finally going to be ok so we can get back to the fluff
- The trauma will continue until morale improves
- everybody knew that favor would come back to bite her eventually
- nobody expected it to bite quite like this
- CW: mention of child molestation but NONE happens
- FYI they are together now and there is non-explicit sex
- "jarthur" is Surro canon now
- also they may clown on Cthulhu but he is not actually a joke
- everybody's in trouble
- just a glimpse behind the curtain
- they have a battle ahead of them that belongs to no one else
- also uh
- there will be explicit stuff in sides shhhh
- .
- This one is nasty
- Mean
- Dark
- ouchy
- very painful KAYNE IS NOT GOOD OR FUNNY HERE you have been warned
- everyone else is here too but they're more referenced than anything
- yes this is just after they all got kicked out
- Thanks Oba... er Kayne
- Sometimes though you just need to sit down and have a good meal for normalcy to raise its head
- also
- jarthur is canon now as we said
- so is sunnyparks
- yes the title is a Star Wars quote so sue us
- amazing how we affect one another when we tackle our own damn issues
- oh it's little divorce time
- someone's growing up
- no one's sad about that
- but someone was supposed to be here...
- menses mention
- of course he's not FINE
- but there's this thing about relationships that need a lot of work
- if the work goes both ways... generally it's going to be okay
- Nibbles on the case!
- SPOILER WARNINGS: we’re addressing things now from part 54 on
- well technically. surro diverged at end of s4 but part 54 revealed some Things that Happened
- and have perhaps been weighing upon poor John
- we've been building to this conversation for a very long time
- remember this is a different timeline - some things will not be the same
- sometimes things that are different are worse!
- everybody hold your breath
- it ain't over yet
- Spoilers for Part 54
- this gets violent
- very not pretty
- someone is getting A Bit Tetchy as his own private plot line continues
- someone else needs five damn seconds to think but he won't be getting that today
- the neurospicy be neurospicying yes even gods can have that
- "beach day" does not mean what he thinks it means
- they're handling it well all things considered
- no Arthur can't catch a break what fandom do you think this is
- this is some OLD sibling rivalry
- only Arthur could create a situation to get them talking again
- but what’s this there are big things to talk about nobody’s said?
- I’m in shock I tell you
- the Mortal Coil is still their best-distributed fanzine
- no they don't know Hastur's seen it
- they would all die by implosion
- odd was one puff away from seeing the Hat Man
- instead he got Multiple Eldritch Monstrosities
- ofc he shrugged that shit off like it was NOTHING
Summary
The King in Yellow had a plan. It worked, and Arthur Lester broke.
Then it all went to hell.
A certain Outer God took issue with his favorite show's cancellation, and arrived with certain demands.
Hastur is furious. His adopted daughter is afraid. John wants to kill his other half; and Arthur has a lot of healing to do in rebuilt Carcosa, in the mystical Dreamlands.
Forced family is not, as it turns out, a good time for anyone.
- Words:
- 989,465
- Works:
- 225
- Bookmarks:
- 161
-
The Harbinger by yolkipalki
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game)
04 Nov 2025
Tags
- Graphic Depictions Of Violence
- Rape/Non-Con
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion
- Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon & Jaskier | Dandelion
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Lambert
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Jaskier | Dandelion
- Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon
- Triss Merigold
- Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
- Aiden (The Witcher)
- Eskel (The Witcher)
- Lambert (The Witcher)
- Ermion | Mousesack
- Vesemir (The Witcher)
- Baba Yaga
- The Witch of the Woods
- Valdo Marx
- Countess de Stael
- Zoltan Chivay
- Canon-Typical Violence
- Blood and Injury
- Sacrifice
- Self-Sacrifice
- Hurt Jaskier | Dandelion
- Emotionally Constipated Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Emotionally Hurt Jaskier | Dandelion
- Emotionally Hurt Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Family
- Found Family
- Political Alliances
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Whump
- Jaskier | Dandelion Whump
- Competent Jaskier | Dandelion
- no beta we die
- Minor Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
Summary
It rained the night that Jaskier died. No matter where Geralt went, the shadow of the bard always found him. Try as he might, nothing could chase away the ghost that lingered there.
I've had this collecting dust in my drive for years. It's time to let it breathe.
Bookmarked by Patrochilles69
14 Dec 2025
-
The Bards' Gamut by sanura for Nemainofthewater
Fandoms: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
05 Sep 2020
Tags
- No Archive Warnings Apply
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Jaskier | Dandelion
- Shani (The Witcher)
- Eveline Gallo
- Valdo Marx
- Priscilla (The Witcher)
- Adrien de Rouleau (The Witcher)
- Essi Daven
- Mozaïk (The Witcher)
- Geraskier Exchange 2020
- Mystery
- of a sort
- Poetry
- in excessively technical detail
- just a lot of medieval and renaissance poetic terminology
- Oxenfurt
- Academia
- musical academia
- even worse
Summary
Jaskier has always been ambitious. Sometimes he achieves greatness. Geralt can admit that, when he has to.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,533
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 219
- Kudos:
- 891
- Bookmarks:
- 364
- Hits:
- 9,281
-
Wit and Haven's Eskel Whump Dump by CreativWit, Rose_SK
Fandom: The Witcher, The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types, Wiedźmin | The Witcher Series - Andrzej Sapkowski
- Teen And Up Audiences, Explicit, Mature
- Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
- M/M, Gen, F/M
- Series in Progress
11 Sep 2021
- Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
- No Archive Warnings Apply
- Graphic Depictions Of Violence
- Rape/Non-Con
- Eskel/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Eskel & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Lambert
- Eskel & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion
- Eskel & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Jaskier | Dandelion & Lambert
- Eskel & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Eskel & Lambert (The Witcher)
- Eskel & Vesemir (The Witcher)
- Eskel & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Lambert & Vesemir
- Eskel & Jaskier | Dandelion & Lambert
- Eskel & Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
- Eskel & Vesemir
- Eskel & Aiden
- Eskel & Coën
- Eskel & Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Vesemir
- Aiden/Lambert (The Witcher)
- Countess Mignole/Vesemir (The Witcher)
- Eskel & Mignole
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
- Eskel/Triss Merigold
- Coën & Eskel (The Witcher)
- Coën/Letho z Gulety | Letho of Gulet
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Jaskier | Dandelion
- Eskel (The Witcher)
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
- Lambert (The Witcher)
- Jaskier | Dandelion
- Vesemir (The Witcher)
- Aiden (The Witcher)
- Coën (The Witcher)
- Deidre Ademeyn (mentioned) - Character
- Original Male Character(s)
- Lambert's mother
- Lambert's Father (Mentioned)
- Cirilla Fiona Elen Riannon
- Other witchers
- Triss Merigold (mentioned)
- Vesemir (Mentioned)
- Jaskier (mentioned)
- Aiden (mentioned)
- Scorpion (The Witcher)
- Countess Mignole (The Witcher)
- Letho z Gulety | Letho of Gulet
- Triss Merigold
- Eskel
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia (mentioned)
- Lambert (The Witcher) (mentioned)
- Vesemir (The Witcher) (Mentioned)
- Whumptober 2020
- Eskel Whump (The Witcher)
- Protective Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Canon-Typical Violence
- Angst
- Fluff
- Hurt/Comfort
- Feral Behavior
- Curses
- Psychotropic Drugs
- Feral Eskel
- Headaches & Migraines
- Brotherly Love
- Brotherly Bonding
- Brotherly Affection
- Fluff and Angst
- Angst with a Happy Ending
- Emotional Hurt/Comfort
- head massages
- Geralt is a Good Brother™
- Lambert is a Good Brother™
- Jaskier is a Good Brother™
- Eskel Has Self-Esteem Issues (The Witcher)
- slight reference to PTSD
- Self-Esteem Issues
- Self-Worth Issues
- Self-Hatred
- Emotional Talks
- Geralt and Lambert just really want to take care of Eskel okay?
- Eskel better let them
- Blind Character
- Blind Eskel
- Family Fluff
- Wolf Pack
- Kaer Morhen
- Winter At Kaer Morhen
- Kaer Morhen's Fanon Hot Springs (The Witcher)
- Axii (The Witcher)
- Somne
- Graphic Depictions of Torture
- Torture
- Reopening of Scars
- facial scarring
- Repressed Memories
- Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
- Angst and Hurt/Comfort
- TW: Eskel is tortured
- Hurt Eskel (The Witcher)
- Anger
- Protective Lambert (The Witcher)
- They both love Eskel very much and Eskel loves them back
- Bingo
- The Writing Corner Bingo
- Prompt Fill
- Nightmares
- Self-Doubt
- Implied/Referenced Self-Harm
- Anxiety
- Anxiety Attacks
- Panic Attacks
- Men Crying
- Fear
- Abandonment Issues
- Fake Child Death
- Murder
- Dark Thoughts
- Death
- Graphic depictions of violence - Freeform
- Massacre
- Suicidal Thoughts
- Child Abuse
- graphic depictions of death
- Please let me know if I have missed any more tags
- There are quite a few of them
- The Writing Corner Bingo Event
- Suicidal actions
- Pre-Slash
- Gen or Pre-Slash
- Childhood Friends
- Childhood Memories
- Childhood Trauma
- Flashbacks
- Druids
- Druid Eskel
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia is Still a Witcher
- Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence
- Graphic Description
- Backstory
- Hurt Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Soft Eskel (The Witcher)
- Kidnapping
- Implied/Referenced Torture
- Starvation
- Dehydration
- Protective Jaskier | Dandelion
- Protective Witchers (The Witcher)
- Rescue
- A bit of shapeshifter!Jaskier
- He's very dramatic in this
- Not important but I thought you should know
- Light Descriptions of Self-Harm
- Self-Harm
- Jealous Eskel (The Witcher)
- Eskel Has Feelings (The Witcher)
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia Has Feelings
- Lambert Has Feelings (The Witcher)
- Insecure Eskel (The Witcher)
- Touch-Starved Eskel (The Witcher)
- Self Confidence Issues
- Wolf Puppy Pile
- Puppy Piles
- Cuddling & Snuggling
- Platonic Cuddling
- Brothers
- Brotherly Angst
- Eating Disorders
- Body Dysmorphic Disorder
- Anorexia
- Mild Sexual Content
- Winter at Kaer Morhen (The Witcher)
- Emotionally Constipated Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- POV Eskel (The Witcher)
- Sexual Objectification
- Emotionally Constipated Lambert (The Witcher)
- Parent Vesemir (The Witcher)
- Thoughts of Self-harm
- Distorted Body Perception
- Food aversion
- joking about trauma
- Exercise Fixation
- over-exercising
- Misophonia
- Past Child Abuse
- past suicidal ideation
- inappropriate use of signs
- Graphic Description of Weight Loss
- Bradycardia
- cardiac arrest - Freeform
- Temporary Character Death
- heart issues
- Vomiting
- Graphic Descriptions of Emesis
- Relapse
- Minor Aiden/Lambert (The Witcher)
- Minor Mignole/Vesemir
- Tough Love
- Reinforcement of unhealthy eating habits
- Timeline What Timeline
- Recovery
- Letho has a heart but he's mostly an ass
- Angst with a Hopeful Ending
- Child Neglect
- Implied/Referenced Child Abuse
- Adoption
- Anxiety Disorder
- Separation Anxiety
- Depression
- References to Depression
- Codependency
- Coming of Age
- Adultery
- Cheating
- Drifting Apart
- Siblings
- Sibling Bonding
- Gaslighting
- Isolation
- Car Accidents
- Good Sibling Eskel (The Witcher)
- Protective Eskel (The Witcher)
- Past Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
- Caring Lambert (The Witcher)
- Soft Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Soft Lambert (The Witcher)
- Yennefer is a Bitch
- Not Yennefer-Friendly
- Divorce
- Concerns about Suicide
- no suicide
- Therapy
- Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
- Coping
- loss of appetite
- weight loss
- Unintentional Eating Disorder
- Alternate Universe - Modern Setting
- Modern Era
- Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers
- Implied/Referenced Drug Use
- Ambiguous/Open Ending
- Possible Character Death
- possible major character death
- Regret
- Acceptance
- Major Character Injury
- Sad
- Sad Ending
- Drabble
- Loneliness
- imposter syndrome
- Depressed Eskel (The Witcher)
- Depreskel
- Background Relationships
- vent fic
- No Fluff
- Hurt No Comfort
- Not A Happy Ending
- Crying
- Abusive Relationships
- Mind Manipulation
- Mind Control
- Temporary Amnesia
- Rape/Non-con Elements
- Stockholm Syndrome
- Hostage Situations
- Pet Play
- Master/Slave
- Collars
- Leashes
- Accidental Monster-Fucking
- Implied Sexual Content
- Trauma
- Hopeful Ending
- Writing Style Switch
- Platonic Relationships
- Rape Aftermath
Summary
Once upon a time, Wit and Haven met on Discord. They bonded over their love for Eskel. Wit and Haven live in different time zones, so when Haven is asleep Wit spams the chat with Eskel angst. When Haven wakes up, she screams at Wit to make it fluffier.
Since we can't agree whether to make Eskel suffer or give him the fluffiest fluff that ever fluffed, Wit and Haven decided to let the readers decide which they'd rather read.
- Words:
- 160,187
- Works:
- 13
- Bookmarks:
- 41
Bookmarked by Patrochilles69
14 Dec 2025
-
I Had A Dream About You by kinodream
Fandoms: Wiedźmin | The Witcher (Video Game), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
01 Mar 2021
Tags
- Graphic Depictions Of Violence
- Major Character Death
- Eskel/Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Eskel (The Witcher)
- Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Dreams and Nightmares
- Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
- Survivor Guilt
- Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified
- Grief/Mourning
- Witchers Have Feelings (The Witcher)
- Implied/Referenced Suicide
- Canon-Typical Violence
- Hurt Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia
- Hurt Eskel (The Witcher)
- Everyone Has Issues
- Hurt/Comfort
- Post-The Witcher 3: Wild Hunt
- Post-Canon Fix-It
- The Witcher 3 Spoilers
- POV Alternating
- Domestic
- Fiber Arts
- Slow Burn
- It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better
- (but it DOES get better)
Summary
A love story about guilt, snow, and beetroot cultivation.