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  1. Tags
    Summary

    The fight on Boxing Day 2020 end with Ilya asking Shane for a break and Shane walking out the door. Ilya never thought that will be the last time he saw Shane, for a very long time. During this time, everyone Shane loved struggle to cope with the grief, some better than others. Ilya stays in Ottawa and watches over Yuan and David Hollander, grieving their only son, and each in their own, do not survive it. Hayden searches for answers in the wreckage of his best friend's disappearance, turning over events in memory, unable to shake the feeling Shane told him something before he vanished.
    When Shane finally reappears, enduring the unthinkable, broken and barely recognizable, what comes next is harder than anyone anticipated.

    Or: AU after the Boxing Day fight in The Long Game. It's a story of grief, found family, a love that withstands hardship and passage of time, and the most unlikely friendship. Recovery is slow and costly and nonlinear, but that's what makes the happy ending hard won. Major Character Death warning are not for Shane or Ilya.

    Updates Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    68,509
    Chapters:
    20/33
    Comments:
    867
    Kudos:
    832
    Bookmarks:
    305
    Hits:
    30,686
  2. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya tried desperately to hide his feelings, which he had kept buried deep in his heart for nearly nine years. A sudden trip to Russia stopped him just as he was about to say the three words he feared so much. Nine years of hiding, of descending into madness, and of longing for a feeling he could call home.
    If only he knew he wasn’t alone in this madness.

    In short: Ilya is struggling with his feelings and depression, and Shane doesn’t know that his feelings are reciprocated.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,172
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    1
    Bookmarks:
    1
    Hits:
    78
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Mama once said not everything beautiful is meant to stay.

    Like the green flash at the sea, gone before you can decide whether you imagined it.

    He realizes now it wasn’t about losing things, but about recognizing them in time to carry them with you.

    And that was all she ever meant.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,424
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    2
    Kudos:
    5
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    166
  4. Tags
    Summary

    Will Hollander's favorite person in the whole world is his big brother Shane. Determined not to spend his eleventh birthday without him, Will lies to his parents and bikes twelve miles to Shane's cottage....only to discover that Shane's "silent retreat" is considerably less silent than advertised. Along the way, he becomes the accidental catalyst for Shane and Ilya's relationship being revealed.
    Some birthdays are more memorable than others.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    15,302
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    33
    Kudos:
    314
    Bookmarks:
    73
    Hits:
    4,947
  5. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya knew that he was bad at being a vampire, and he liked it this way. He knew that he was cursed, that he was a monster, but not inherently evil. He didn't have to be rotten like his father as long as he held onto his principles and the knowledge that he had to stay away from humans, no matter how drawn he felt to them.

    Four Lessons. Four Beliefs. A simple construct of rules. Quite easy to follow.

    Or at least they had been, until Ilya met the head of the Montreal Coven, a vampire named Theriault. It had been a day like any other, an assignment to build connections with the Coven for his father's dealings. Nothing special. Until Ilya laid eyes on Theriault's thrall.

    Just like this, all of Ilya's lessons and rules were blown to pieces.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    84,031
    Chapters:
    7/?
    Comments:
    190
    Kudos:
    528
    Bookmarks:
    150
    Hits:
    12,624
  6. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya closes his eyes.
    He blinks back his tears. He wants to nod or shake his head or something, but he can't.
    This can't be happening.
    He blinks and blinks and blinks again but he's still in the hospital and he still feels like shit and his mom is dead and Shane is far away and he thinks he's depressed and there is something inside of him that he doesn't know what to do with.
    Fuck, he thinks, in russian and in english and in french, even. Fuck.

    Or, in 2020, Ilya has a (very) unplanned, (very) complicated pregnancy, Shane has to learn that sometimes things don't work out the way he planned, and some other things. Set in The Long Game, kind of.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    27,752
    Chapters:
    4/7
    Comments:
    125
    Kudos:
    614
    Bookmarks:
    150
    Hits:
    9,395
  7. Tags
    Summary

    Shane’s cheeks blushed at the memory and his intense desire to see his husband immediately if not sooner. He responded once more to Ilya’s last message before locking the door behind him.

    Shane 5:30
    Maybe next time you’ll listen to me

    Shane 5:31
    I know you won’t
    but I still love you

    His phone dinged.

    Ilya 5:31
    Love you more

    or

    Shane dies a hero and Ilya can’t live without him. Shane will literally move through heaven and earth and hell to be reunited with Ilya no matter the cost. Can their love find a way when it is impossible, with dangers beyond comprehension, might the effort take everything that makes them who they are and leave nothing behind?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,824
    Chapters:
    5/11
    Comments:
    1
    Kudos:
    17
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    574
  8. Tags
    Summary

    Going back to the beginning of their relationship.

    Sex-Wise, anyway.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,033
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Kudos:
    35
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    711
  9. Tags
    Summary

    Shane was an omega, or he was going to be, his test results were clear on that fact. It wasn't technically the end of the world, omegas were technically allowed in the MHL, but there were rules. Rules for safety. Rules like having to be mated. So he needed to suck it up, socialise and find an alpha who was willing to mate an eighteen year old who wanted to play ice hockey, a sport known for it's tendency to land players in hospital with permanent dissabilities.
    Enter Ilya Rozanov, an Epa alpha who made the unusualness of Shane's male omega status practically normal by comparison. But they had something in common, a frustrating safety rule barring them both entry to the MHL without a mating bond. Someone really should have thought that one through before letting two young dumb teenagers make one of the biggest decisions of their lives for the love of hockey.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,508
    Chapters:
    3/?
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    227
    Bookmarks:
    82
    Hits:
    2,643
  10. Tags
    Summary

    After a leaked video unravels his life, Ilya Rozanov arrives in Ottawa hoping a trade will offer a fresh start. Instead he finds an old house, a city he doesn't understand, and a presence waiting quietly in the spaces around him.
    It watches. It listens. It learns him.
    Ilya Rozanov does not believe in spirits.
    Not yet.
    Or: A Russian hockey captain learns municipal bin collection schedules, accidentally acquires an angel, a kitten, and something resembling a family, and handles all of it with varying degrees of competence.

     

    Inspired by Wings of Desire (1987)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    31,392
    Chapters:
    7/14
    Kudos:
    16
    Bookmarks:
    10
    Hits:
    620
  11. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya and Shane marry after Rookie season

    Due to Shane being a little more aware of himself thanks to Yuna, over-prepared mamma bear, explaining all types of sex/attraction to him from a young age (“He needs to be prepared for anything! I am not pigeonholing my son!”), Shane knows he’s crushing on, if not falling for, Ilya.

    The butterfly effect occurs; this has only one outcome really. It’s a small thing. Tiny. When Ilya is not there for Shane’s Rookie of the Year award after-party, Shane is worried, needing to track down the other man, instead of slightly annoyed/upset that he would be without Yuna’s lessons.

    This in turn leads him to not doing shots with Scott Hunter.

    Which means only one thing: other than the whole ‘definitely being aware of falling for your rival’ tiny thing. It shouldn’t change much.

    He is not drunk on that balcony with Ilya.
    -
    Ilya Rozanov is married, everyone knows this. His wife, Jane, is strict, perfect, stunning, pretty, boring, and Canadian. She’s always too busy to meet the team.

    Shane Hollander is married; some people know this. He doesn’t speak about his wife Lily much, but he’s absolutely smitten with her.

    FULL BLURB AT NOTES TOO LONG

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    30,828
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Comments:
    610
    Kudos:
    2,555
    Bookmarks:
    821
    Hits:
    50,622
  12. Tags
    Summary

    Ilya Rozanov hasn't listened to much Canadian music. That's about to change.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,227
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    10
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    261
  13. Tags
    Summary

    He could still feel it now, the warm-wet slide of Ilya's tongue as he licked a stripe from the sensitive skin on Shane's palm to the tip of his middle finger, shocking a laugh out of him. The head-rush of feeling how quickly his cock hardened against the warmth of Ilya's bare ass, Ilya's full weight bearing down on Shane's hips. The heat of the blush traveling from his cheeks all the way down to his chest in response to the smoulder in Ilya's eyes.

    Мой любимый, this is excuse to put sunscreen on my naked body, yes?

    Shane gnawed at the memories like a dog with a bone, allowed himself to get lost in them until he felt physically sick, at which point he realized that he needed to switch lanes to avoid hitting the fawn, still unmoving, still unblinking.

    After the Raiders v. Metros accident, Shane comes back different.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    39,319
    Chapters:
    13/14
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    681
    Kudos:
    785
    Bookmarks:
    316
    Hits:
    18,755
  14. Tags
    Summary

    David and Yuna come over for dinner, but Ilya has a surprise for Shane.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    542
    Chapters:
    1/2
    Kudos:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    282
  15. Tags
    Summary

    Rookie Roz has fucking nothing on the self-destructive bastard that spawns in the fall of 2016.

    The demon that has swapped places with Cliff's best friend has one goal, and that is seemingly to kill the body it has stolen. The CGM app looks like a goddamn mountain range, and for the entire first two weeks after The Breakup Cliff is waking up several times a night to call Roz and get him to deal with the high or low that he’s trying to sleep through.

    And then the notifications stop.

    (Or, 5 times and ways someone helps Ilya manage his type one diabetes + 1 time the world finds out about it)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,687
    Chapters:
    1/6
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    255
    Bookmarks:
    93
    Hits:
    1,481
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Their first vacation at the cottage is going perfectly. They're official boyfriends, they've told each other they love one another. Ilya doesn't think he's ever been this happy in his life. He's never been so close to happily ever after.

    Then, he convinces Shane to try his favorite fruit, and Ilya is swiftly reminded of why exactly he doesn't get happily ever afters.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,335
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    416
    Bookmarks:
    66
    Hits:
    3,060
  17. Tags
    Summary

    After making the decision to end his career with the Montreal Metros, Shane Hollander starts planning for his future as an Ottawa Centaur. But while Shane is busy planning his next move, Ilya has plans of his own. Shane's move to Ottawa doesn't just mean they can play together on the ice, it also means no more separation, and that they can finally move into the future they've been working towards together.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,592
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    136
    Bookmarks:
    34
    Hits:
    2,864
  18. Tags
    Summary

    A series of vignettes where Shane reminds everyone that he is ALSO the man in the relationship.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    28,012
    Chapters:
    24/?
    Comments:
    911
    Kudos:
    3,684
    Bookmarks:
    711
    Hits:
    89,392
  19. Tags
    Summary

    Life after Heated Rivalry from Yuna's POV, with lots of texting.

    Technically a sequel to "Shane's Lily", but you don't need to read that in order to understand this.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,488
    Chapters:
    33/?
    Comments:
    3,125
    Kudos:
    9,841
    Bookmarks:
    1,486
    Hits:
    256,519
  20. Tags
    Summary

    A simple weekend trip to visit Shane’s family turns out to be anything but when it’s clear Ilya isn’t feeling well. Cue the whole Hollander family stepping up to care for him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    37,107
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    63
    Kudos:
    640
    Bookmarks:
    165
    Hits:
    22,583

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